#do not attempt

[bearotonin-international]

Can you kiss a polar bear?

uh.. if you don’t mind dying, then yeah probably.

[consult-sherlockholmes]

Do not tempt me. Maybe this would be a nice evening activity to stave off the boredom.

[malbecmusings]

Not today big boy - ©adrianamarine

[itsreaditandwow2]

It's crushing my belt into my belly bone.

Anthony Padilla

[spacevixenmusic]

Source: Avatar: The Legend of Korra [2014]

[p1nkparader]

How to make friends in college:

1. Meow

2. Wear cool clothes so ppl will comment on them and then you can then compljment them and then hug and tackle them to the ground and force them into being your friend

3. Meow

[yume-fanfare]

though i think last year's world cup semifinals were still more memorable because they happened the same day atlantis started. an absolute insane 2-1 match that had been 0-0 up until the last 10 minutes AND it was at the same time as bombshells such as "a second arranged marriage proposal has hit eichi tenshouin" were delivered. and i was on a hike. absolute insane energy

[nicosraf]

How to ask Lucifer on a date? Fuck Michael, I'LL worship him for eternity.

Depends on which Lucifer!!! Part 1 Lucifer you can just pick up and throw over your shoulder and take him anywhere nice. But if you want to ask him out, he'll cry a bit, and you'll have to convince him that you actually want to be his friend. He would enjoy going to watch a fight with you or cooking with you or anything fun really.

Part 2 Lucifer wants you to kiss the back of his hand and ask, softly, if he'll spare you a second of his precious time to dance. If you're cute, he says yes. If you fumble too much, he says he's too busy. Lucifer isn't interested in anyone who's weak.

You can try asking Devil Lucifer on a date but... I would advise you don't.

[c0l0rsp1k3]

I just feared for my life because of a fucking website jumpscare

Pro tip for anyone trying to acces Kekma(.NET)

TURN DOWN YOUR FUCKING VOLUME AND DON'T EVEN THINK OF ACCESSING THE SITE IF YOU'RE SQUEAMISH

My god

Thought it was just a cheap spook but oh god it is FAR from that

[pumpkingeorge]

Hoppy Easter

[therottenkingsreckoning]

God couldn't stop me and neither can you

[germaphobephysicist]

Lesson learned:

Car batteries don't like being used to melt metal. Also your car shuts off if you try to turn it into a welder.

[rioblitzle]

working retail

[cleelczipsybane]

WLC 4.4: Slaughter-in-Law

"Quick, while she's not looking, try to kill me," says Ling.

"I'd love to," says Angustias, "Is this a game to you?"

"Not like your a threat to me." Ling shakes her head.

"What is that supposed to mean?" snarls Angustias.

"She won't kill me. Ya can't."

"Why did you stop running?" Angustias slides toward Ling.

Ling ignores her and sits on the bed. She pulls out her magic orb and flicks it. "I've been trying to save this world again, but ya idiots chasing me making that a helluva pain."

Angustias towers over Ling. "Then why not just walk in. We both know you could have."

Ling continues flicking the orb, scrolling the images on it. "Would either of ya have just let me in? If it weren't her idea?"

Angustias rages, unable to find words.

"Keep hissing, snake." Ling's eyes stay on the images in her orb, scrolling onward.

For a moment, Angustias' hand twitches, as if she intends to conjure her weapons once more, but she relents, glancing back to the bathroom door. "You will not drive my daughter from me."

"Yeah, I know how much that sucks," says Ling. Subtle laughter comes out of the other room, by pure coincidence.

"You're responsible for that yourself, gex," says Angustias, slithering away and positioning herself toward the door.

"No s***e, demon," says Ling, "Don't worry, ya'll have gobs of chances to f**k it up yourself."

"Do you not fear death?" asks Angustias, folding her arms.

"Hard to fear it," Ling continues scrolling though pictures, "When I know ex-act-ly where I'm going." She raises a hand and wiggles her claws. "Viva~ Los Vicios!" She laughs. "So, my daughter's trophy wife's not breaking my legs anytime soon."

Angustias grabs her own face. "What is taking them so long? IS SHE SEWING HER A DRESS?"

[bacchuschucklefuck]

couldnt draw my thang for mid-autumn so treated myself to a calne redesign instead

[thekittyfox2999]

the image i had-

i will never be the same

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