#devil fish review

[thecraggus]

Devil Fish (1984) Review

A spaghetti wet 'un, this unabashed Italian rip-off of Jaws is more likely to make you die laughing than die of fright. The Devil Fish is in the details. #Review

[web-novel-polls]

Less Popular Danmei Character Tournament - Round 1 Bracket

Side A

Yan Hao vs. Xiao Chiye

Shen Zechuan vs. Wang Zhi

Gu Mang vs. Yan Zhengming

Side B

Wenren È vs. Song Qingshi

Yin Hanjiang vs. Wu Xi

Li Yu vs. An Zhe

Cui Buqu vs. Helian Ye

Exempt from Round 1: Yue Wuhuan

Side A of the Popular and Less Popular Danmei Character Tournaments will take place on the same day (Thursday, June 8, 2023) around noon CST and will remain open for 1 week.

Side B Polls will open on Tuesday, June 13th, 2023, at noon CST and will remain open for 1 week.

Character Information under the cut (subject to change) - CWs: sex mention, death mention, murder mention, slavery, sexual slavery, rape mention, animal mention, animal death mention, pet death/murder

Side A

Yue Wuhuan from Mistakenly Saving the Villain

A villain saved by the MC who is focused on revenge. The story seems to focuses on trauma recovery from his life as a s*x slave and handles mental health pretty well 

Technically a “yandere” character, but the Novel Updates reviews describe his possessiveness and dark thoughts as byproducts of his trauma that he heals from, realizing that he shouldn’t be thinking of the MC that way and growing

“Our ML’s journey embodies a major theme of MSTV, which is about redemption and rebirth. His tragic past shaped him into a cunning, ruthless, manipulative, and obsessive individual. His past and continuing struggle will make your hearts break. It’s a difficult and painful journey of overcoming past trauma, letting go, and subsequently achieving freedom and happiness.” - blackkoi on NU

Yan Hao from Vicious Male Counterpart Isn’t Competing Anymore

Submission: He’s p cute

Yan Hao was jealous of and competed with his younger brother, who seemed to be loved more by their parents. After he dies, however, he realizes he was a villain meant to contrast his kind younger brother and be slapped by the male protagonist. Once he’s reborn, he decides to ignore his brother entirely

“High IQ, low EQ” - Sugaminny on Novel Updates

Honestly, the story sounds super cute and interesting. Yan Hao seems to be a character “hated by everyone” in his past life who can’t figure out how to be loved but does love others a lot, especially in his second life. Skite on NU describes him as autistic and villainized due to his neurodivergency / attempts to be loved and praised (their review words it better, but it sounds super interesting). 

Xiao Chiye from Qiang Jin Jiu

Submission: Also an absolutely insane character but somehow not as deranged as his husband, shen zechuan, although he comes pretty damn close. i just wanna cause problems by putting them in the same poll 

“VERY cocky and arrogant (sexy of him), but also an extremely talented leader and fighter” - QJJ Carrd

Initially kicks Shen Zechuan, the MC, due to SZC’s father’s treason, but starts to fall in love with him (Enemies → Lovers)

Shen Zechuan from Qiang Jin Jiu

Submission: he just serves absolute cunt and is absolutely insane. like we joke about characters being crazy but shen zechuan is the 1st one where ive paused reading and said outloud oh bitch you are absolutely out of your mind. Give it up for ruthless chronically ill schemers with a sense of loyalty so strong it becomes a fatal flaw and who are also at all times 100% devoted to the ppl they care about

The son of the Prince of Jianxing, who betrays the empire out of cowardice, that must survive when his entire family is to be killed for treason. There’s actually a scene at the beginning of him losing his brother in a battle and (I believe) returning to realize his father has run away

Another of the “chronically ill schemers” type and incredibly ruthless when necessary

Refuses to die or despair; he WILL survive and will turn things around - fate can be damned

Wang Zhi from Fourteenth Year of Chenghua

Submission: Wang Zhi is the emperor's eunuch-assassin who spends the entire book and show crashing the main character's brunches. There's a scene where someone gets confused because they can't fathom why Wang Zhi would show up at someone's house if it's not to murder them. In the series he has a tiny gun. 

Gu Mang from Stains of Filth / Yuwu

Submission: He’s my little guy

He’s the tragic ML who betrayed the MC while also being the biggest fucking clown / the comedic relief

He truly believes he’s a fucking wolf at one point. 

Essentially, Gu Mang was a slave in Murong Lian’s household, which led him to meet the MC, Mo Xi, who is a noble of similar standing to the Murong clan. He eventually becomes the General-in-Chief of the Wangba Army (later renamed to the Northern Frontier Army bc it was a funny name) and fights for the Chonghua Empire. However, since the Wangba Army was made of slaves, not a single of his fellow soldiers were given a proper burial, which - along with other reasons - led to Gu Mang defecting to an enemy nation (that also killed Mo Xi’s father and may or may not be cannibals).  

The story begins when said enemy nation trades Gu Mang back to Chonghua as a prisoner of war with parts of his soul gone, causing him to believe he’s a majestic blue wolf. The summary is a tiny bit misleading, albeit not wrong - “they’ve slept together before” is actually more “they slept together multiple times while Mo Xi, at the very least, is incredibly in love with Gu Mang.”  

Gu Mang’s also pretty funny, even with his memories gone, albeit the inherent tragedy is overwhelming. Idc what “evils” he committed… the Lotus Pavilion thing or whatever was fucked up. The author is so brutal to him, and for what? Funsies? (<--mainly joking, but it’s a SAD story… I’ve cried so many times) 

Anyway, Gu Mang Did Not Deserve This 2023 

Yan Zhengming from Liu Yao: the Revitalization of Fuyao Sect 

Submission: Winner of the award for highest number of times I’ve called a man a “pretty princess” 

Apparently has a fantastic character development into the Sect Leader (I’m not that far), but he’s also just a pretty princess <2

He’s the eldest disciple of Han Muchun / Fuyao Sect who was born into a rich family. He ran away at age seven and became Han Muchun’s first apprentice/disciple. He’s similar to a spoiled young master character, but he doesn’t really bully anyone; he may try to bully/clash with Cheng Qian, but I don’t think he wins (been a while since I started it - he’s like 15, and Cheng Qian is ~9-10 at this point) 

“Strict with others but lenient on himself” → responsible Sect Leader pipeline, More at 10 pm

Side B 

Wenren È from Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know

The MC of Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know, Wenren È, finds a book that details the world around him where he’s the second male lead / love interest who dies to protect the Female Lead / protagonist. He is not in love with her, and he can’t imagine dying for her as is; he also doesn’t understand why his subordinate, who supposedly likes her as well, tried to kill her after his death. I think he’s tasked with addressing readers’ concerns with the novel, but there’s also a lot more going on lol

Submission 1: unhinged, no idea what romance is, has a feral dog with rabies for a boyfriend and thinks that boyfriend is super cute. Also, middle aged man. I love middle aged men.

Submission 2: Because Look, he is trying to get two characters to fall in love for Important Plot reasons and a: him and his main Minion have to look up what love is like in the shitty romance novels they're characters in, and then b: decide to make the two characters fall in love through the Cunning Use of Bugs. Also he got a copy of the book he is a character in, found out his fate, and was like I Think The Fuck Not. 

He also has pretty good morals, if not personality. He’s a much better guy than I expected him to be tbh 

Song Qingshi from Mistakenly Saving the Villain

A medical student who chooses to transmigrate into a sad Danmei novel to save the protagonist. He does not save the protagonist - he saves a cannon fodder villain named Yue Wuhuan. 

“Has a lack of understanding of social situations/an odd personality” - past submission (Danmei Tournament)

Very intelligent but dense to love and s*x; book smart; passionate about what he likes

Yin Hanjiang from Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know

Submission 1: He’s my little scrunkly

Submission 2: He’s my evil wife.

Yin Hanjiang is the second-in-command of the current Demon Lord Wenren È and the fourth male lead of Abusive Romance: You are the Unchanging One in My Heart, a novel Wenren È reads. In the novel, Yin Hanjiang blackens and tries to kill the female lead after Wenren È’s death. 

You would think Wenren È would be the craziest mf in this story, but it is, in fact, Yin Hanjiang. In the original novel, he tortured/chased the FL for quite a while to the point of being one of - if not the most - hated villains in the story; he was originally masked and revealed in a completely unseen twist, I believe. 

He was saved by Wenren È as a child and is obsessed with him, although their relationship changes more to friends than boss-subordinate WAY before they get together. 

Wu Xi from Lord Seventh / Qi Ye 

Submission: He is the roundworm in my stomach

Qi Ye tells the story of Prince Jing Beiyuan’s seventh life, which is a repeat of his first life. Wu Xi is the Great Shaman’s Shamanet and the Empire’s captive from Nanjiang who did not appear in Jing Beiyuan’s first life. 

From what I remember, he uses something similar to magic to make a court official become aroused / see a beautiful woman and embarrass himself in front of the entire court. As a child. 

He also has a vast array of dangerous and venomous animals, one of which he gifts to Jing Beiyuan after they become friends. 

Li Yu from Disabled Tyrant’s Pet Palm Fish 

Submission: He’s infuriating and I love him, also helped create equal rights in ancient china

Li Yu transmigrated into a carp tasked with stealing a mute tyrant’s heart (by the system). He does not know how he’s supposed to do this, but the tyrant - Mu Tianchi - is waiting for him to transform into a human, already in love(?) with him.

The reviews on Novel Updates are… mainly unflattering… but he appears to be a naive and sweet character with in a fluffy love story with the ML, Mu Tianchi 

An Zhe from Little Mushroom 

Submission 1: honest to god, he’s just a little mushroom

Submission 1: he’s just a little mushroom

An optimistic mushroom mutated into a human trying to find his stolen spores

“An Zhe is the only person who wholeheartedly believes in Lu Feng [the ML]” - Carrd 

Cui Buqu from Peerless

Submission: He’s mean, he’s disabled and unapologetic about it, he’s a genius and all his braincells escape him when faced with his rival, he’s a secret agent and has no martial arts, he’s deeply in love and will never say so unless pushed, he will liken his rival to his sun and then tell him he’s the most annoying person he’s ever met. He’s a bastard little fox <3 

Helian Yi from Lord Seventh / Qi Ye 

Qi Ye tells the story of Prince Jing Beiyuan’s seventh life, which is a repeat of his first life. All of his first five lives have been tied to Helian Yi - he helped him ascend the throne in their first life, he was an insect crushed by Helian Yi in his second life, he was a beloved dog killed to feed Helian Yi’s family in his third life, he was a neglected jasmine plant in his fourth life, he was a fox skinned by Helian Ye in his fifth life - but in the first and seventh lives, Helian Yi’s the Crown Prince of the Jin Empire while Jing Beiyuan is the Prince Nan’ning (a title; he’s not related to Helian Yi as far as I know). In their seventh life, Helian Yi seems to be treating him very well (from what I’ve read), but he’s not the love interest. 

He’s also in Faraway Wanderers (for, like, one chapter) and technically is Prince Jin in Word of Honor (but they’re pretty much completely different characters). Zhou Zishu is his most trusted aid who formed Heaven’s Window and then left. 

Idk, I haven’t gotten that far in Qi Ye; he sounds like the villain, but he’s really just Sad - Idk if he’s in love with Jing Beiyuan or what, but he’s SAD, okay? From what I can tell, he cares for Jing Beiyuan but can’t be with him because of his position as Crown Prince, but don’t quote me on that

“In that instant, Helian Yi suddenly wanted to take him into his arms, suddenly wanted to wholly throw out and disregard the home, nation, and world that weighed down on his mind and body, no longer brooding on and wishing for a liaison he didn’t dare to have. He wanted to say, from now on, come earthly blades of wind and swords of frost, I will do everything I can to block them or you. There is only one person in this life and this world for me, even without this extensive, partially mountainous, mostly oceanic king’s land.” - Source 

Feel free to submit propaganda in the notes or in my ask box!

[kingofbodyrolls]

Seokjin fic recs 2023

In honor of Seokjin’s birthday, I want to share my favorite fanfictions that I’ve read this year. Although I did not read as many as I wanted to, the list will be short. But! I’ve leave my ‘to read’ list at the bottom to make up for it 💜I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹

❗Most of these fics are smutty as hell or contains dark themes, so minors dni.❗ 

If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the original fic’s post 💜And if you want more fic recs you can follow me to stay updated 🙂

BTS fic rec index → May | Jun | Jul | Aug | Sep (jjk)(knj) | Oct (pjm) | Nov (*) | Dec (💜)(kth) |

Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻. 

⭐Knocked by @sailoryooons [10.6K] // ksj x f.reader // roommates to lovers // 🥵😂

📝 Living with people is difficult, but all things considered, your new roommate isn’t terrible. He cooks, he cleans, and if you had to be honest - incredibly attractive. But his habit of streaming until the early hours of the morning while yelling and making other questionable noises has pushed you to the limit. You’ve finally decided to risk your sanity and put it all on the line with a reckless bet in hopes of getting some peace and quiet at night.

🗨️ This was so hilarious, and the build up and pay-off was really good 👏

⭐Sleepover by @peachypinkygloss [7.3K] // ksj x f.reader x pjm // bestfriends!au, threesome // 🥵

📝 You spend a night with your two best friends at their dorm room. You should have known that they wanted to do more than just watching movies.

🗨️ Omg this was so good, the smut 😘🥵

⭐I Don’t Think I’m Okay by @ressjeon [4K] // ksj x f.reader // slice of life, idiots to lovers!au, childhood friends!au // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 With many chances wasted, you couldn’t even resist anymore.

🗨️ A cute little Seokjin fic 🥰

⭐The IKEA Test by @yoon-bug [9.1K] // ksj x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵🥰😂

📝 One review on IKEA’s website called the BRIMNES bed frame the leading cause of divorce due to its difficult assembly. You and Seokjin had laughed when you read it. Now, you weren’t so sure.

🗨️ Their banter and all the sexual innuendos are damn hilarious! I thoroughly enjoyed this very much 💜 

I’m really sad that I didn’t get to read more Seokjin fics 😭 I have a lot on my ‘to read’ list, so I’ll share some that I’m really excited to read when i have more time (and I know they’ll be great because they are written by amazing people!) ✨

‘To read’ list ⬇️

Fast Lane by @yminie [20.6K]

Cherry Topper by @kth1 [17.6K]

Final Sleigh by @floralseokjin [23.3K]

Stuck with you by @taleasnewastime [29.6K]

Small Tuna Fish by @floralseokjin [17.1K]

Off Limits by @floralseokjin [series; completed]

Raspberry truffles by @gukyi [5K]

Christmas Warfare by @gimmethatagustd [14.5K]

9 Months to Fall in Love by @floralseokjin [series; completed]

Redamancy by @jeonggukingdom [7.1K]

Sunday by @here2bbtstrash [5K]

Serve Me by @chateautae [16K]

Meet Me at the Bar by @eoieopda [7.5K]

Internal Conflicts by @yoongiofmine [series; completed]

Forever by @oddinary4bts [25.2K]

Thank you, Daddy by @ktheist [19K]

The Devil Wears Armani by @floralseokjin [series; completed]

Glazed & Dazed by @floralseokjin [30.3K]

Wet & Wild by @jamaisjoons [10K]

Warm this Winter by @jamaisjoons [51.6K]

Peach Parfait by @jamaisjoons [series; completed]

Borderlines by @jamaisjoons [series; ongoing]

All I Don’t Want for Christmas is You! by @minisugakoobies [23.7K]

Cupid’s on Holiday by @persphonesorchid [17K]

Don’t Go Baking my Heart by @candlewaxandp0lar0ids [14.7K]

Platonic by @joheunsaram [series; completed??]

Last November by @kithtaehyung [24.7K]

Sit. Stay. by @daechwitatamic [14K]

Turn Back Time by @raplinesmoon [13.3K]

Made-up Love Song by @floralseokjin [series; completed]

Lost and Found by @taleasnewastime [21.2K]

I’m so sorry that I didn’t get to read more! 😭 Life happened, and yeah. But all of these wonderful fics on my list sound so incredibly good and I really look forward to reading them and give them a lovely review 💜

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEOKJIN!!! 💜 🥳 🎂

[artemis-potnia-theron]

Hi 💙

I would like to worship Artemis, i've looking and investigate about hellenic polytheism and i have a special bond with the Delian triad (Artemis, Apollon and Leto), i love them, but i'm new in this and i want to start first with Artemis...

How i could start? How do you begin with her? I don't know how to start and what i have to do... Could you help me? I see how is your relationship with her and i love it ✨

Khaire! 🫂

So excited to hear about your interest in the trio!! They all hold very special places in my heart, so I love to hear when other people find them as well!

However, although I consider Apollo(n) to be my spiritual father and Leto to be my spiritual grandmother, the relationship I have with Artemis is an intersection of mother, sister, best friend, love of my life, spiritual mistress, queen, ect...so I will be approaching this from a more Artemis focused perspective lol. Hope that's okay!!

First, I would strongly recommend reading She Who Hunts: Artemis: The Goddess Who Changed the World by Carla Ionescu for a really solid, comprehensive overview of her worship. Understanding her history and domains can be very helpful in understanding Artemis as a goddess. Apollo(n) and Leto are featured in it, but mostly in relation to her.

Theoi.com is a good overall resource, but I would recommend sticking to 'scholarly' or peer-reviewed sources as much as possible when trying to get historical information about her cults, worship, and associated religious practices. The same goes for Apollo(n) and Leto.

In terms of personal practice stuff, it took me years to really forge the connection and relationship I have with her how. She can be prickly in certain ways. Her energy is as intense and wild as anything I've ever experienced. Early on, it felt like getting close to a roaming wolf or a hunting lioness. But once you bridge that gap, she's as protective and loves with as much ferocity as a mother bear. Apollo(n) and Leto were a bit less distant, even in the early days - at least for me. So take your time. Don't rush things with any of them, but most specifically not with Artemis lol.

In terms of activities/stuff she likes, I can list some random, everyday ways I connect with her!

- Being out in the moonlight, walking with the nightroaming critters 🌙🦇

- Going on nature walks, hikes, or just sitting outside! Touching grass really works haha

- Work on healing your 'inner child' through shadow work, but mostly importantly through therapy if it's accessible

- Taking care of and/or spending time with animals

- Reading her myths

- 'Ecstatic' dance. She shares a connection with The Mousai (The Muses) and to singing and music in general - a domain she shares with her brother

- Anything involved in childcare and/or childbirth

- Practicing archery

- Standing up for yourself

- Appericating solitude/independence

- Listening to folk music, lol. She loves The Amazing Devil

- Of course, connecting with others close to her helps! Apollo(n) and Leto are the most obvious ones, but she also has close ties to Hekate, Kybele, Dionysus, Persephone, Demeter, Zeus, Athene, Pan, and many more both inside and outside of her 'main' pantheon.

- In terms of symbols and stuff I've found she likes for her altars, she loves deer, bear, dog, fish, boar, and wolf imagery in particular. I associate green, brown, grey, blue, and purple with her. She's loves amethyst. And of course she loves any nature-related offerings!

- I also love connecting everyday stuff with her - albeit in a UPG kind of way lol. I associate the movies Beasts of the Southern Wild and Princess Mononoke with her as well as A Children's Bible by Lydia Millet and We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shriely Jackson and that's all super UPG! Personalize your practice to you, your life, and your beliefs.

What matters most is fostering a relationship with a good foundation. As cliche as it sounds, it really can be about the journey rather than the destination when it comes to deity work. Enjoy yourself, be respectful, decide what you believe, and listen to the lessons she has to teach you. The rest will come naturally :)

Don't hesitate to let me know if you have any other questions! May Artemis' arrow guide you always.

- Taylor 🌙🏹🦌

[insomniumstella]

spite her, spite me (7) | bucky x avenger!reader

summary: Steve’s silly joke happened to inspire the best, or possibly the worst, idea Wanda had ever come up with — send James Buchanan Barnes and y/n on an all-expenses-paid honeymoon in Hawaii. the problem? they cannot stand to be around each other.

warnings: enemies to lovers, forced proximity, explicit language, alcohol consumption, sarcastic!bucky, smut MDI

word count: 8,485

author's note: i cannot believe we reached the end — thank you for all of the comments and the love you've showed this series, it truly means the world! also, i don't know how the nsfw section stretched to be over 2k words and now i'm rethinking every smutty fic i've ever written

WHERE DREAMS GO TO DIE masterlist

series’ SPOTIFY playlist

“The dress is a bit much,” the sergeant’s eyes raked over her gown. 

The intricately beaded dress was black, and sensual, and outrageous, with a deep slit, which exposed most of y/n’s upper thigh. She might’ve seemed like an angel in devil’s clothing to those of unsuspecting eyes, but James understood better. The woman was a fallen saint, and as he committed the image to memory, he had decided that she was placed on this earth solely to tempt him in every way she could. Their story was never destined to be comforting, and easy, no, the story of James and y/n would always be difficult, complex, and shamefully sinful. 

“It seems Maui had been harsh on you, James,” she spoke, “otherwise you wouldn’t be here.” 

The cool touch of his metal arm brushed against y/n’s skin when he took a step forward, coming to stand beside her. It was bothersome, the closeness of his body as they observed the gala’s guests unsuspectingly dancing, drinking, or conversing about matters they had deemed important.

There was only a single matter on her mind y/n considered meaningful, and she had not seen him for the entirety of the night. Steve had been a nimble shadow, shaking hands with the leaders and first ladies of the world. 

“Perhaps, I was wrong,” the word felt foreign on his tongue, “and HYDRA ceased to exist.”

She angled her face to read his expression, but it was aggravatingly blank, “how’d you figure that out, Sherlock?” 

James noticed the sarcasm in her tone and nearly chose to ignore it, “reviewed some files, checked a couple databases,” possibly hacked into Sam’s iCloud to read the texts between you two. "Have any more theories you’d like to share?” 

She chuckled, then chuckled again from the bewilderment before breaking into a boisterous laugh; it couldn’t have been more disingenuous if she tried. “Why should I if the Winter Soldier will only trample on my ideas?” 

Though the dimly lit ballroom overflowed with chatter and soft sounds of jazz, a tense stillness settled between them. The looming threat of Steve’s assassination was not a time for games and stubbornness, and James was frustrated at the spy’s thorny attitude. 

“The Winter Soldier was blinded by bloodlust, but he’s ready to hear out his partner,” Bucky replied with a deep sigh, hoping she’d crack.

“Oh, we’re partners now?” The clench of his jaw didn’t go unnoticed, and she begrudgingly dropped the act. “Back when we attended Elijah’s yacht party, Mark was wary of you hence the fish tend to be vigilant around James comment. I might forget a name, but I always remember a face.” This time, she angled her entire body to face him. “Mark attended a gala in Germany a couple years prior, Steve had me monitoring the security cameras for hours then, and nothing was particularly interesting except for Mark and Wilfred Nagel’s unlikely friendship.” 

“Shit,” his flesh arm clasped around her forearm, “ Nagel’s the doctor CIA had recruited before he seemingly disappeared into thin air.” 

“Bingo,” she replied with a popping sound. “The accusations against Elijah, Mark’s presence on the boat, and the conversation between him and Wilfred months before Wilfred’s disappearance had me conceptualizing a theory of Mark and Elijah working alongside Nagel to produce super-soldiers.” A server boy approached the couple, and she promptly replaced her empty champagne flute with a fresh glass. “I’d assume Captain America would ruin those plans." 

“The theory’s still blurry,” James released the grip on her arm, smoothing out the invisible wrinkles of his black suit. “If they’re plotting to execute Steve, why wouldn’t they assassinate me as well?”

She drank him in — the sergeant’s black suit was made of satin, alike the dress shirt, matching her onyx gown. Perhaps he had willingly chosen to abstain from a tie, or perhaps, he had been too headstrong to admit she had been correct about HYDRA, subjecting James to a lack of time for elaborate preparations. She decided it must’ve been the latter, for Bucky had worn the outfit to a party Natasha had organized after the court had pardoned his crimes. 

“They could,” she agreed, “but they wouldn’t because you’ve been forgiven and have since retired, remember? The Winter Soldier enjoys a peaceful life away from criminals, Avengers, and fights.” 

“The sucker has a wife too,” James gawked into y/n’s eyes, and she tittered at his attempt at a joke. “She looks good tonight.” 

The glimmer in his expression she couldn’t understand.

She took a swig of champagne, peering at James over the flute for a single awkward moment too long, “was that a compliment?” 

“It should’ve been,” he pursed his lips together. 

James was allowed to feel frustrated, angry, and disappointed about y/n’s actions, he had decided after she had packed up and hastily abandoned the honeymoon. The woman had betrayed him by hiding significant information and biting her tongue on theories of HYDRA and its remains. Worse, she had fled Maui without as much as a goodbye, leaving James to sleep in the bed, angrily alone. Though his appetite had been ruined, he had chosen to order room service and watch terrible TV shows she had recommended to Wanda in the prior months. The sheets had been tainted with the scent of y/n’s perfume and lotion, a delicious blend of strawberry and vanilla. The Lovers’ Suite had been scattered with traces of her, and when he had ditched the room at last, deep into the night, even the beach had seemed to remind James of the bizarre yet pleasant memories they had shared. He wouldn’t have admitted it out loud, but he had begun missing y/n’s presence, prickly remarks, and the pointless arguments over the smallest of things. 

“Steve’s backstage," Sam’s voice was a muffled sound through the earpiece. 

She took a step forward, using Bucky’s body to shield herself from possibly prying eyes. “What about Mark Basso?” 

James paled at the closeness of their bodies, but remained professional, examining the ballroom of feasible threats. 

“I can’t find him, the dude’s been a ghost for the entire night, but,” there was a pause in his speech, “Elijah Williamson is backstage,” she could hear Sam drum his fingers on a metal surface, “they’ve been conversing for a good while.” A second passed before his words reached y/n’s ears once more. “Are you certain Mark’s appearance at the party is enough to incarcerate him?”

The woman recognized she should inform Sam of the situation without excluding certain details, and yet she couldn’t. If Sam understood the gravity of Elijah’s gala plans, he’d abandon monitoring the security cameras and would certainly place himself in danger to save the Captain. She needed the footage of the events that were to occur backstage, for she had already deceived James, allowing the soldier to believe HYDRA continued to exist. 

The eight months they had spent together, unraveling Elijah’s life, had been honest, on y/n’s part, but the last five days had not. James had pursued false leads and theories, and she had let him. Sam might punish her with a harsh lecture, move to live on Natasha’s floor or stop coming to Friday’s Tequila Nights at Barry’s if he discovered y/n’s incomplete truths, but it’d be worth it, for he’d be in the security room in case Mark had planned to delete the footage. James deserved peace, and she craved to ease his mind two criminals at a time. A former HYDRA officer and a corrupt politician behind bars was a good start to rid of the nasty organization and its remains. 

“The man’s a HYDRA operative,” she reminded, clutching James’ hand to lead him through the crowd of guests, “who just happens to be identified as deceased,” y/n maneuvered around people, dodging staff members and unsuspecting bystanders, “imagine the headlines and the public’s fear when it’ll get revealed the US government missed a dead man walking after the program to incarcerate security threats was implemented.” A corrupt program for a corrupt country. “President Ross would imprison Mark just to save face.”

The pair soon found themselves backstage. The stage was narrow much like the hallways, and though the space had plenty of overhead LED lights, it was painted a pitch-black color, and the confusing maze of corridors, entrances, and clothing racks seemed rather murky. She hauled James into the women’s bathroom and hurriedly locked the door. The soldier had seen women dragging men into bathrooms at clubs and parties. He was old, but he wasn’t dead — James understood what a couple would do in a bathroom together hence his confusion and reddened cheeks. 

She raked her eyes over his face, “we’re not having sex, Barnes.” 

“Is it because Steve needs saving or,” the smallest of smirks danced on his lips as James observed y/n step on the toilet to open a vent, “is it because you want our first time to be special?” Amusement colored his tone. 

She threw a miffed glare toward him before continuing to rummage in the outlet, “do you actually believe I burn with lust for you?” 

“Yes,” Bucky caught a pale yellow gym bag after she tossed it at him, “surely did during the honeymoon.” 

“We’ll always have Maui,” she smiled with faux sweetness, stepping off the toilet and on the sparkling white tiles. 

The smirk dropped from his lips at the comment because he had been open, honest then, and she just teased him about it. If time allowed for it, she might’ve apologized, guilt beginning to claw at her heart, but she ignored the strange emotion. 

“Sam,” she pressed a finger on the earpiece before squatting down to search in the sack, “James is with me,” y/n found an additional earpiece, standing up and taking a step forward to gently attach the gadget onto the soldier, “do you have eyes on Steve?” 

“Yes,” the Falcon murmured, audibly upset by Bucky’s presence. “James, hi,” he spoke through the intercom, “y/n, didn’t you say you'd leave the tin-man in Hawaii?”

“Obviously, I failed,” she replied, earning a soft smack from James on the shoulder, “when does the charity auction start?” 

“It should begin in fifteen minutes,” Sam spoke, inspecting the view on the monitors, “an incredible date with Amelie Barnes, a gorgeous New York City socialite, is fifth on the list to be auctioned, seven offers before the old-fashioned date with the handsome Captain America.”

She glanced up at James, studying his bewildered expression. “There might be a few things you’ve missed,” y/n grinned in faux innocence before promptly clarifying, "we needed access to the backstage areas. Do you have a gun?” 

“No,” James begrudgingly admitted, ashamed to have missed a crucial detail in his attire. 

The pair stood in front of each other without a sliver of space in between. She didn’t give herself a minute to think the action through, resting her hands on his chest as she hastily lowered into a squatting position to reach the bag. James sucked in a breath as y/n’s hands slid across the length of his body. She rested a single palm on his upper thigh for balance while she retrieved a set of pistols, but just before his mind had enough time to register the sudden stimulation, she arose, clutching his flesh bicep to steady herself. 

“Tuck it into the waistba—“

“Alright,” James interrupted her, “I’ve done this before.” 

She let go of his shoulder, taking a step backward. “There’s no need to be rude,” y/n shrugged. 

“I’m not being rude,” he rebuffed the comment, “just worried about where you’re planning to hide the gun.” 

A slight smile waltzed on her lips as she pushed the bottom of her gown aside, faintly exposing lacy onyx panties and a holster. James choked, once, at the obscenity of her response. 

“I’ve done this before,” she teased him, “sergeant.”

The charity auction had been a distant thought until she was standing on the stage with dozens of eyes upon her. She could hear the voice of the auction's host, describing the date she’d be forced to attend and the chatter of middle-aged men, hoping to secure the evening with Amelie Barnes, but y/n could only focus on searching for Mark in the crowd.

Nancy wouldn’t have lied to someone about Elijah and Mark’s wicked plans because the lawyer had zero motives to deceive a person she trusted. At least the woman hoped Nancy trusted whoever it had been on the other side of the phone because her whole plan revolved around Mark’s appearance at the gala. She’d never wish for Steve’s untimely death, but she did wish for the HYDRA operative and the politician to be caught on camera as they attempted to eliminate him.

“Let’s start the bidding at a thousand dollars,” the host announced, and she swallowed the lump of nerves in her throat.

A man on the left side of the ballroom raised his bid paddle. He seemed utterly too old to take y/n out on a date, and she shivered at the possibility.

The host beside y/n smiled, peeking at her. “We have a thousand, can we get more?”

“Two thousand!”

“Three thousand!”

“Five thousand dollars!”

She could barely register the number of voices, each interrupting the next to outbid the other.

A woman, close enough to the stage that she could see her face, raised the paddle. “Ten thousand dollars!”

“Ten thousand dollars for the woman in a green gown,” the presenter spoke cheerfully. “Amelie loves art galleries and tennis at The River Club of New York!” He encouraged the guests to aim higher. “The woman’s a real good company."

What the fuck did Sam tell them?

If she had ever thought that time spent in James Buchanan Barnes’ proximity must have been the worst thing the world could possibly offer, which she often would, she had been wrong. She was a spy, she had undoubtedly used her appearance to obtain certain information or opportunities on missions before, but the auction caused goosebumps to waltz on her skin — to be suppressed into an object, the perfect accessory for a date night, was one of the worst emotions she had ever experienced. 

James stood in the back, observing her panic-riddled expression. She had forgotten Tony’s credit card in Maui on accident, and though Tony would skin him alive if he spent as much as a dime on it, Tony and James had never been close buddies, so what further damage could his impending action legitimately cause if the damage of the two’s past had already been irreversible.

“Fifteen thousand dollars,” James raised the bidding paddle, grinning at y/n.

She stood on the stage perplexed at the sound of Bucky’s voice, frantically searching for his face in the sea of people.

“Ladies and gentlemen, we just got our highest bid of the night! Fifteen thousand dollars for the man in the back going in one, two, th-“

“Thirty grand for the man in blue.” A deep voice reverberated through the room.

She abandoned her search for James, locking her gaze on Mark. The spy had inspected the crowd once, then had inspected it for a second time, and the agent had not been comfortably sitting at a nearby table, peering at her through the top of his champagne flute. Mark must have sneaked in, which signified that either Steve was already dead or Elijah was waiting for Mark backstage, conversing with Captain America before commencing the plan of a brutal murder.

“Forty,” James challenged, studying in which direction y/n’s disgusted glance pointed.

“Fifty thousand,” Mark announced before the host had a chance to say anything, continuing to scrutinize her. The agent’s smile was cocky, overconfident, almost as if she was the victim and he was the hunter; as if he had discovered y/n’s deepest and darkest of secrets.

“Fifty thousand going in one, two—“

“A hundred thousand dollars,” James yelled, interrupting the ghost, and maneuvered to stand by the stage.

Silence settled upon the room at the sheer absurdity of his proposed bid. The truth was, the sergeant had spoken before he could think because the world, at that moment, had not existed outside the gala. She was standing on the platform, the glitter in her special lotion, as she’d describe it, glimmering underneath the fiery spotlight. She was clad in an opulent gown, dripping in pearlescent onyx beads and intricate patterns. She was reduced to nothing but an object in the auction, a good company auction's participants could purchase. 

She, the woman who’d never become a friend, for he’d always crave to be her lover. 

The spy averted her piercing gaze away from Mark and glanced at James. Concern was visibly displayed in his eyes, yet his grin, sweet and playful to steady her nerves, remained. A corner of her mouth quirked up, and she mouthed a silent thank you. James was attempting to outbid every person in the room to save y/n from a terrible date, and he was willing to do it in understanding that Tony would lecture, if not evict, him. 

The moment shattered as she returned her eyes to Mark, and her expression turned deadly. The spy might have played the role of an obedient, pleasant wife and woman on Elijah’s boat, but it was apparent he had acquired some kind of insight into who she verily was. It was useless to pretend she desired to be friends with Mark, a positively unsuspicious Elijah’s friend, who just happened to surprisingly specialize in foreign weaponry. 

“This is shockingly incredible,” the host trumpeted in amazement, pausing for a second, “a hundred thousand dollars for the man in the satin suit going in one, two, three.” Mark basked in the daggers she sent toward him, sipping on his second glass of champagne as James glided onto the stage, clasping y/n’s fingers in his gloved hand, and placed a chaste kiss on her knuckles. “The date with Amelie Barnes has just been sold to the guy in a lovely suit,” James and y/n exchanged amused looks at the host’s comment, “but don’t abandon your seats just yet ladies and gentlemen, because up next we have a cooking lesson at Daniel with the beautiful chef Olivia Stroud.”

“Thank you,” she softly acknowledged his sacrifice at the auction, "for what you did back there."

The pair hid behind heavy velvet curtains, a hairsbreadth away from each other, occasionally peaking through the crack to inspect the limited backstage area for Mark or Elijah. It slightly resembled a room suited for rehearsals, mimicking the layout of the ballroom and the stage on a lesser scale. The space was cluttered and messy, with tangles of cords littering the floor and racks of clothing lining the walls.

A date with Steve was the last to be auctioned before the break, establishing the perfect opportunity to catch him off-guard and without innocent eyes around to witness the gory sight of Captain America’s murder.

James smiled, shyly almost. “I couldn’t allow myself to watch and do nothing while creepy old men fought over a chance to spend time with Amelie,” he teased, adjusting a fallen strap of y/n’s gown, “my hatred for you doesn’t stretch that deep.”

Heat crawled up her neck and onto her cheeks. “Bucky, you are an old man,” the woman teased, “perhaps not creepy, but weird? Absolutely.” 

“I’m not weird,” he argued, suppressing a smile, “you eat ice cream with pickles for toppings.” 

False shock stained the edges of y/n’s expression, “it was one time, and I only tried it because Pepper affirmed it was the most delicious thing she had ever eaten.”

“Pepper was pregnant,” he reminded playfully, earning a light smack on the shoulder.

The two Avengers swiftly switched into vigilant agents at the sudden squeak of the door. It was Mark, who entered the room first, scanning over the area for unwanted people. Steve appeared in the room seconds later, an arm resting on Elijah’s shoulders as he vehemently laughed at something the politician had mentioned.

It would’ve taken a fool to miss the obvious problem at hand. 

Steve was seldom intoxicated. She’d know, for she had spent too many gatherings attempting to outdrink the man without real success. Thor’s Asgardian mead was deadly to mortals but pleasantly kind to gods and super-soldiers alike. Earthly alcohol, contrariwise, was harsh on him; the taste delectable, the effects on Steve’s modified human body meager. 

It abruptly struck y/n — guns signified blood, plenty of it, and an operative smart enough to fabricate files of his supposed status as deceased wouldn’t be reckless and leave a plash of evidence in the backstage area of a charity gala’s ballroom. 

“Good news,” Sam’s voice echoed in the pair’s ears, “I have eyes on Steve,” he paused briefly, “bad news, Mark Basso and Elijah Williamson are plaguing the Captain.”

James opened his mouth to speak, but she silenced him by placing a tender finger on his lips. “Sam, how closely were you monitoring the security cameras?”

It was a simple question she hoped the Falcon wouldn’t take offense to. 

He did. 

“I was observing the monitors like a hawk, y/n.” 

She refrained against an unnecessary comment and focused on the task, “and the video has audio?” 

“Yes.”

She took a step forward, closing the barely existent gap between them, “Elijah and Mark must’ve spiked his drink,” y/n hushedly whispered, circling a hand around James’ waist to touch the handgun she had provided. 

The pistol was securely tucked into the waistband of his trousers, and the sergeant cocked his head to the side. I’ve been on missions before, the glimmer in his eyes stated, and she could sense the early stages of his frustration, I didn’t accidentally drop it or nothin’. 

“At any point, did you notice Steve drinking a whiskey he had not ordered himself?” 

“Alright,” Sam clicked his tongue, “so I might not have an answer to that particular question, but I can say that Steve went into the bathroom twenty minutes ago, and his face seemed quite pale.” 

James placed a finger on the gadget, “did anyone accompany him?” 

“Yes, a line of beautiful ladies,” the Falcon responded, and James could nearly visualize Sam rolling his eyes in annoyance. 

The two men bickered some more, but she had tuned out the conversation, studying the scene onward. Everyone has a tell, y/n recalled. Though Steve’s words regarded lies and treacheries, the advice had not yet lost its meaning. It had been New Year’s Eve when she had gotten a nasty infection and had forgone Thor’s mead due to antibiotics. The compound’s residents had partaken in a friendly drinking competition then, and Steve had sworn the alcohol couldn’t exhilarate him, except his eyes had been droopy, and he had clutched James’ biceps for balance. 

Steve leaned on Mark, his laugh far less joyous than it had been before, so perhaps Nancy had been wrong, and they had not planned to eliminate him at the gala, but rather drug the Captain, sneakily transporting his unconscious body to a place, devoid of prying glances and curious endeavors. She wondered whether Elijah would linger in the room until the poison took its course. It’d be easier to carry dead weight, for Steve might fight against the operation.

The plan was meticulously calculated except for a single nuance. Why would the two men bring Steve into the backstage area in the first place if they could’ve used the narrow hallways and hidden exits to sneak out?

“We should slaughter Wilfred.” Mark spoke as if answering y/n’s concerns. “I specifically told Nagel he cannot be late.”

“It’s a slight blunder,” Elijah replied, oblivious to the surroundings, and the woman behind the velvet material, around him. Steve was barely awake. “We have Rogers and a bit of time before he’s supposed to appear on stage.” 

It was impossible to ignore James’ piercing eyes, and she hastily peeped at him. “Do we wait?” 

And she craved to have the correct response to his question, but, despite her usual confidence during missions, she didn’t have an answer. James had allowed her to lead, and she felt as if she was disappointing him, lingering behind a curtain as the Captain, a friend, clutched the very enemies they wished to incarcerate. The only thing y/n understood in great certainty was that Steve’s body couldn’t leave the premises of the establishment. 

“Did you see Mark or Elijah on the phone at any point in the night?” 

“Mark was a ghost,” Sam’s voice crawled through her earpiece, “but I distinctly remember Elijah in a heated conversation. The man arrived at the gala with his wife, presumably, and scuttled away into a lonely corner soon after, which I found interesting.” 

The former HYDRA operative’s phone dinged, and she lowered her hands to reach for the gun strapped to her thigh. Steve’s dormant body nearly hit the ground as he lost consciousness, and Elijah slithered his hands under Steve’s armpits to support the Captain’s weight. The woman’s heart clenched at the sight, of her confidante resting against Elijah’s chest like a heavy sack of potatoes, entirely unresponsive to the situation.

“Let’s move,” Mark clasped his ankles, and the unlikely allies hoisted Steve’s figure, “Wilfred messaged he’s awaiting outside.”

She could only comprehend Elijah's high-pitched shriek that rang in her ears, silencing the laughs, chatter, and footsteps sneaking into the space from the ballroom. James was the first to abandon the secure hiding spot behind the curtain, pointing his gun at the man, a stern expression on his face. A couple seconds passed before she trailed after him, shoving a pistol into Mark’s back as a threat. Steve’s body caused a harsh crash sound when it hit the ground, but she could only concentrate on Sam and the amount of time it’d take him to reach the ballroom backstage from the van parked outside.

“On your knees,” y/n instructed, firmly thrusting the gun against his skin.

The operative lazily raised his arms, making no effort to do as she had requested. “Amelie Barnes,” he chuckled, “what a stupid alias,” the situation didn’t afford contemplations on how he could’ve realized she was more than a homemaker, “though I must admit, I almost fell for the lovebirds' act by the way you two basked in each other on the boat.” Mark’s tone was tainted with smugness. 

Elijah landed a painful punch on James’ jawline, and he staggered back at the surprise of the action before he straightened up and kneed him in the stomach. 

She drew in a breath, “you’re wrong.”

The operative ignored the politician and the fight he seemed to be losing, “am I?”

She jabbed the pistol into his muscled back once more, hands quivering at the unspoken confession; it swallowed the room, knocking the air out of her lungs. “Get down on your knees,” she spat the warning.  

“A dozen names,” he snickered, “and not a single true. Mindy Phillips, Tara Marvin, Katherine Bailey just to identify a few.” 

“This is the last time I’ll repeat myself, get down on your fucking knees.”

“C’mon, y/n,” he spoke, lowering his arms a bit, “we can come to an agreement that’d satisfy both of us.”

She froze at the mention. The curiosity almost lured her into the biggest mistake she could make — playing along. “Elijah and HYDRA’s golden agent behind bars is the only agreement I’d be delighted about.” 

Mark suddenly turned around, grasping one of y/n’s wrists, and she clobbered him across the head with the hand that was clutching the gun. He wobbled, momentarily, before he tackled her to the ground, thighs resting on either side of her own, and gripped y/n’s wrist once more. The gun landed by her, and she writhed in his hold to reach it, but it was useless. Mark harshly pinned her arms above her hand, leaning in so close she could feel his disgustingly hot breath upon the skin of her neck.

He snickered, grazing the top of her ear with his lips, “we could’ve worked together,” Mark lightly nipped at the sensitive spot, “could’ve been a real good team.”

She found his eyes, amused and eerily hungry, and spat in his face, “fuck you.”

Mark laughed, but before he could sputter another comment, James was pouncing on the agent, resting his entire weight on him just as Mark had done to y/n, mercilessly pummeling the flesh of his upper body.

She averted her gaze from the bloody sight, searching for Elijah. The politician was sprawled out on the cement floor, by Steve’s feet, unconscious. A huge gash tainted his bottom lip, and purple had begun tinting his cheekbones. She glimpsed at James and the small cuts that adorned his handsome face; Elijah must’ve stricken a few great hits before the sergeant had stunned him cold.

Sam barged through the door. Besides the Falcon, she was the only person in the room without visible injuries, though her joints ached from the pressure Mark had used to clutch them.

“I called reinforcement,” he spoke, kicking her gun to a corner Mark couldn’t reach.

“Care to help?” Bucky’s teasing comment amidst a fight was almost comforting.

Sam rolled his eyes, joining James in the scuffle with the agent. She focused on Steve, crawling to his dormant body. Though it was dreadfully faint, his heartbeat remained. It was difficult to raise the top half of his weight, yet y/n succeeded, supporting his neck and shoulders as she inspected the back of his head for damage. She gasped silently, noticing that the blonde of his hair had been stained red. The split in his skin wasn’t deep enough to be profoundly alarming, but it'd require stitches. Speedily, she checked the time on his watch, creating a mental note, and lowered his figure to rummage in his pockets for a cell phone. The Captain’s head she placed upon her folded legs.

The woman’s fingers trembled as she typed in the emergency number. In the years they had worked together, never had Steve fallen unconscious, nor had he obtained a gaping gash in the back of his scalp. Elijah and Mark must've given him an alarmingly high dose of tranquilizer to knock the super-soldier out entirely, and she was scared.

The two Avengers had handcuffed Mark when the call between y/n and the local emergency service had ended. The operator’s voice has been soothing and calm, and she had turned the iPhone off feeling far more composed than she had been when she made it.

“An ambulance should be here in a few minutes.”

“That was quite dramatic,” Mark noted, a weak chuckle slipping past his lips, “Steve ingested sedatives, not poison.”

James placed a gun to his temple, and Sam planted a hand on the sergeant’s shoulder, “don’t engage him,” the Falcon advised, turning to y/n, “did you know?” 

She recognized Sam’s true question was did you know they planned to kill Steve?

“Yes,” she averted her gaze to observe Steve, “I’m sorry.” The spy was genuinely apologetic for hiding certain information. 

Sam drew in a deep breath, pursing his lips together, “why wouldn’t you tell me?” 

“I needed you to monitor the security cameras,” she answered truthfully, “I needed someone to transfer the footage into our database,” the explanation was honest once more, “I was afraid Mark or Elijah would attempt to tamper with it.”

“She was right, we had a whole plan 'n' everything,” Mark chimed in, and James pushed him down to his knees.

He sighed in frustration, the pistol lingering in its position against Mark’s skin, “stay fucking quiet, asshole.”

The Falcon ignored the commotion in the background, his expression strained as he continued to stare at her, “you should’ve told us.”

The statement disintegrated into thin air, the weight of it still heavy on her shoulders. She stayed silent, brushing away the sweaty pieces of hair that had stuck to Steve’s forehead. His face was eerily peaceful as he rested, unconscious, on the cement floor, head propped on y/n’s thighs. The gown Sam had chosen for the evening was sprinkled with blood in various spots, albeit the dark color disguised it. It was gorgeous and elegant, she’d admit, but it was destined to burn after the events that had unfolded during the gala.

“I’m sorry,” she repeated, her voice drained of emotion.

“The two of you should return to the hotel,” Sam suggested when a group of FBI officers spilled into the room, “shower, eat, rest. I have zero doubts it’s been an exhausting week,” he half-heartedly joked, referring to the faux honeymoon, “I’ll stay with Steve.” 

“Sam,” she spoke, “we want t—“

“Go,” the Falcon interrupted her, “please,” one of the officers firmly hoisted Mark, and James swiftly reached y/n’s kneeling figure, “I got this.” The tone of his voice had whispers of irritation at its edges. 

“Alright,” she agreed, helping a paramedic transfer Steve’s body onto a stretcher, “I trust you.” 

Sam glanced at James, shoving his hands into his pockets, and returned his eyes to y/n. “Good.” The look they exchanged was strangely comforting, the kind of look that conveyed Sam wasn’t angry, per se, but rather vanquished, and disappointment she could deal with. 

She offered him a weak smile, “I should shower.”

The Falcon chuckled, mouthing a silent go, and turned his focus to James, both of you. 

James stood in the hotel room’s doorway.

She was fidgeting with lavish jewels, her patience stretching thin as the necklace’s clasp remained closed despite y/n’s nimble fingers attempting to work it open. She glanced at him, once, before regaining focus. “Why are you here?”

The sergeant shrugged, though she couldn’t see it. “I forgot to book a hotel room.”

She ceased her movements, observing his awkwardness-laden body language. James’ long-forgotten suit jacket dangled over his bent arm, the other hand shoved into the pocket of his satin trousers.

“May I suggest driving back to the compound?”

The corner of his mouth quirked up into a small grin at y/n’s thorny response, “we’re in the middle of Manhattan, and the compound is a three-hour drive away.” James closed the heavy wooden door, locking it behind him. “Can I stay with you?”

“It seems you’ve answered the question before I had the chance,” she referenced the action, staring at him in forged disbelief.

The atmosphere stilled in a pregnant pause. It wouldn’t be harmless for the couple to sleep in the same bed. They had done it in Maui, and neither her skin had broken out in a rash nor had she perished. On the contrary, it was peaceful to relish in the warmth of his skin.

James dumped the jacket on an empty chair, slowly coming to stand in front of the woman. She could almost hear the thumping of his heart, his body a hairbreadth away. Sirens echoed outside the sealed window, saturating the silence in crimson sounds. New York City contrasted with the lush green of upstate New York. The living quarters at the compound were usually deprived of clamor, protected against harsh winds and white noise by thick cement walls. 

“Let me help you,” James cooed, sliding his hands across the skin of her arms upward. The soft pads of his fingers caressed her collarbone before he grasped the necklace’s clasp and easily worked it open. “We could be great together,” he spoke, turning to gently place the diamond choker on a glass desk, “great partners,” her fingers ghosted over the spots James had touched, “great lovers,” he toyed with the idea. 

The sergeant returned to his previous place and, “great lovers,” she teased, “you think we could fit together?” 

“Mmmh,” he concurred, “but we always extinguish the flame before it truly burns.”

She brushed her hands across the smooth fabric of his dress shirt, savoring the firmness of his muscled chest beneath the textile. We always extinguish the flame before it truly burns. Perhaps James was correct — she had been opposing a traitorous fire within the deepest pits of her heart, and body, long before Wanda had a terrible idea to send the two on a faux honeymoon. 

“Kiss me,” she spoke in an honest confession of lust. 

“What?” James’ voice was breathless as he gawked at the woman in foreign excitement and disbelief. 

Oh, the way he hoped she’d realize that the line between love and hatred stood thin, and they had surely blurred it in Maui, but never did James think she genuinely would. The fault was his, partially. It had been easy to fabricate false narratives for the compound’s residents, convince himself he loathed the woman despite the countless nights of wandering hands and shameful memories of her body. James had designed a malicious persona, but oh, the way he hoped she’d see through it. 

“Kiss me,” she repeated, “because just once, I need to get you out of my system,” her hands slithered to his biceps, “kiss me, so the next time I’ll touch myself at night, it won’t be your face I’ll be seeing.” 

James cupped the back of y/n’s neck, crashing their lips together. The world in the background ceased to exist at the moment. He swiped his tongue against her bottom lip, asking for permission, and she surrendered to the request, tangling her fingers in his copper locks. She gingerly pulled at the root, earning a muffled whimper from James, and he slid his metal arm down to y/n’s waist to bring the woman closer, to erase the barely existent gap between their bodies. She burned with arousal, and Bucky was equally as famished. It was only the lack of oxygen that pulled the couple apart, and James drew in a deep breath, capturing y/n’s lips once more seconds later.

It was a dangerous promise, the kiss. A wildfire that spread through the entirety of her body, stimulating every nerve ending until she was moaning into his mouth as a plead for more, tongues fighting for dominance. It knocked the air out of her lungs, and when she retreated, James didn’t meld their lips, opting to focus on y/n’s neck. He kissed, licked, and sucked the sensitive skin like a man deprived of the only thing he’s ever desired. She was a drug, and god, was James addicted to her scent and her silky skin, and her hands, sloppily untucking his dress shirt, to slide under the fabric and explore his taut muscles. Everywhere she touched scorched, and he messily searched for the zipper of her gown, discarding the dress to the ground as soon as the piece of metal relented.

She was the most beautiful sight James had ever seen as she stood in front of him in just a pair of lacy panties. Art, created by the world’s most talented of artists, an angel bestowed to him by the gods themselves. 

The sergeant brushed his flesh thumb across her lower lip, blending their lips together. His metal hand, the one she had always disgracefully thought was outrageously attractive, slithered between her plush thighs, and James moaned into her mouth upon discovering that she was soaked and aching for him. He shifted the undergarment to the side for access, dragging his fingers through her silken folds. 

Cool metal thumb pressed into her clit, and she broke the kiss, “inside,” she spoke, the tone of her voice laced with desperation, “I want you inside of me.” 

“Sweet girl,” James chuckled, inserting a single digit into her slick heat, “you need to be stretched first.” 

He thrusted his finger a few times before adding a second digit. She clenched around him, messily unbuttoning his shirt and throwing it on the carpeted floors. The pace of his thrusts remained steady and agonizingly slow as James basked in her pleasure-riddled expression. 

The woman clutched the waistband of his trousers, messing with the belt, her fingers trembling as James continued to stroke the sensitive spot inside her with two of his fingers. “Please,” she muttered, “faster.” 

A sly smirk waltzed on his lips at the request, but, instead of obeying y/n’s wishes, he halted the activity, removing his hand, and placed the metal in his mouth, sucking it clean, “such a sweet thing you are.” 

Warmth crept up her neck and onto her cheekbones. He hastily removed the trousers, placing his hands on the back of y/n’s upper thighs, hoisting the woman, and gently tossed her onto the spongy bed. She stared at him through curious eyes, lowering her gaze to observe the bulge in his boxers, and swallowed the lump in her throat. Judging by the outline in his underwear, James was huge, far bigger than the men she had fooled around with in the past. 

“I want to taste you,” she confessed, propping herself up on her elbows.

James shook his head no, hooking his fingers under the waistband of her onyx panties to tear them off, “next time, doll.” 

She wasn’t certain whether there would be a next time, for James had discovered a side to her, she had long buried. An alter ego, who was submissive, and pliable, and starved for the touch of a man she described as her enemy. 

James nestled between her legs, arms on either side of her waist, and placed chaste kisses on y/n’s mouth and jawline. His head dipped lower as he assailed her neck and chest, popping a nipple in his mouth. The sergeant sucked the sensitive bud before nipping on it, massaging her other breast with his hand and rolling the right nipple between his fingers. 

She writhed under him, eyes shut from the waves of pleasure racing through her. James didn’t linger over the area, choosing to concentrate on kissing the length of y/n’s body as he crawled to situate himself betwixt her thighs. Goosebumps painted the path of his eager kisses, and she grasped a handful of his hair when James gave her clit a kitten lick to test the response. 

“James,” she purred as he repeated the action and slithered two digits back into her dripping heat. 

“Use your words,” he grazed his tongue over the bud again, applying a little bit more pressure, “tell daddy what you want.” 

The woman’s eyes shot open at the term but then he was thrusting his fingers into her wetness, repeatedly hitting the delicious spot that made her toes curl, the insult toward James forgotten. 

“Mouth,” she mumbled, too lost in the delectation to form a coherent sentence. 

James snickered at her vague response, wrapping a pair of soft lips around y/n’s clit. The thrusting of his fingers persisted as he stimulated the area. James was spelling out his full name on her sex, she realized by the time he had started tracing a b for Buchanan, yet she abstained from further reflections, coming undone by his mouth and fingers seconds before James could complete tracing the s in Barnes.  

“Good girl,” he praised, helping y/n ride out her orgasm.

James withdrew his fingers, sucking them clean of y/n’s stickiness before he removed the metal with a pop, and peeled off his boxers, flinging the garment across the space.

The room was modern and opulent, with floor-to-ceiling windows exposing the ever-awake skyline of New York City, its sky-high buildings, impressive bridges, and countless lights. It was situated on the fortieth floor of the hotel, creating a perfect opportunity to indulge in a bit of a rush and leave the curtains wide open without a true risk of innocent bystanders witnessing the scene.

James kneeled on the bed. The usual glimmer of annoyance toward her in his eyes had been replaced by a feral kind of hunger, and, as she stared at him like a pray would observe its hunter, y/n decided that, just maybe, this wouldn’t be the first or the last time she’d let James treasure her body. 

She loosely draped her forearms over his neck when he slanted to capture her nipple in his mouth, “I know you consistently ignore my wishes,” she whimpered, “but for the love of god, sergeant, I need you.” 

He chuckled, showing attention to the other bud by pinching it, “my sweet girl wants to get filled, huh?” 

James’ throbbing weight rested heavily against the skin of her thighs, and she reached down to palm it. “Yes.” 

The woman’s nimble fingers caressed the reddened tip, spreading his precum on the surface before she dipped her hand a tad lower to gently fondle his balls. A moan escaped past his lips at her eager endeavor. 

“I like it when you’re needy,” James pulled back and she groaned at the loss of him in her hands, “and dripping,” his fingers ghosted over the velvety folds before he was manhandling the spy to rest on her knees and forearms, “willing to let daddy take care of you.” 

She ignored the name yet again but stored it within her memories to use for blackmail in the future. “Is he?” She questioned when Bucky clutched her hips and pushed his hand down on her back for a deeper arch. “Is daddy gonna fuck me, or is he just going to talk all night?” 

James understood she only used the term to mock him, but shit, did it stir his already aching cock. He palmed himself twice before dragging his length along her slick folds, the metal hand abandoning her hips to circle her waist and gently rub y/n’s clit from behind. She clenched around emptiness, pressing into his pelvis for friction, and Bucky ceased his movements, removing the fingers from her bud to harshly grip the flesh of y/n’s hips once more. James continued the torture, lazily teasing her entrance, and she painfully sunk her teeth into her bottom lip. 

“What do we say when we want something?” He taunted the woman, utterly enjoying her anguish. 

“James,” she mumbled into the crisp sheets. 

The soldier found amusement in the warning but showed mercy, sinking into her sodden heat. He’d fuck the brat out of her on a different day.

A strained whimper escaped past her lips at the delicious stretch of his cock, matching Bucky’s hiss at the way the spy’s walls drunk him in. James thrusted into her a few times, experimenting with speed and rhythm. A particularly rough roll of his hips seemed to rip a piercing moan from y/n’s throat, and he grinned, abandoning the hold on her hips to massage her clit again.

The room was saturated in vulgar noises of skin slapping against skin, moans, and desperate whines as James mercilessly pounded into her. She sobbed into a pillow as he led her to the edge for the second time, refusing to burst the bubble and let the flame consume her, thick fingers retreating just before the orgasm could ignite her body, over and over again.

James consumed every shallow breath and every wail, deciding that it would not be the last time he’d listen to the melody — she was a sin he’d gratefully burn in hell for, and an angel he’d break down heaven’s gates to attain. The soldier suddenly removed himself from her, already missing y/n’s silken walls squeezing around him, and shifted the woman, so that she rested on her back. He captured her ankles, draping them over his shoulders before he roughly thrusted back in. She wept at the overstimulation when he bottomed out, balls slapping against the skin of her ass. The new angle allowed James to reach far deeper. 

He groaned, “you’re so tight,” thumb brushing against her plush lips, “my sweet, sweet girl,” he cooed, “wanna worship this pussy all night.” 

And in his head, the statement stood true, but it was his body that opposed it, his arousal steadily creeping over the edge of an orgasm. 

She shut her eyes, expression drenched with pleasure, “I’ma cum,” she moaned. 

“I know, doll.” James wiped off the tear threatening to roll down her cheek and captured y/n’s lips in a messy kiss. 

“It feels good—,” she hiccuped when he pulled away, “—so good.” 

The world stilled. It was only James’ ragged breath and the heavenly orgasm she could focus on, washing over her body in syrupy waves and causing her toes to curl into the mattress below. She raked her nails over the skin of his back, leaving scorching marks in her wake. 

“Shit,” James cursed as his own peak approached, his strokes sloppy. 

It was a few thrusts later when he climaxed, painting her velvety walls white with a loud moan. He licked a sensitive spot on y/n’s neck, propping himself up on his forearms when the thunderous arousal began to quiet.

She brushed the hair that had gotten stuck to his sweaty forehead aside, “we don’t have evidence to convict Nancy,” she spoke when her heartbeat steadied.  

James sighed amusedly, pulling out his softened length and maneuvering to lay beside her. “This is what you say after we just had sex for the first time?” 

“Yes,” she deflected, refusing to admit she had fallen for the soldier and that it would not be the only time they’d get tangled in the sheets. 

“Alright,” he abandoned the bed with a laugh and gathered y/n’s exhausted body in his arms to locate the bathroom, “but let’s shower before we talk shop.” 

James observed the skyline of New York City. It was the place they had first encountered one another, back when he had brutally stabbed the woman. She rested on his bare chest now, peacefully asleep, soft snores falling from her lips. Times have changed, James realized with a heavy heart because change was uncertain and scary. It was worth it, though, if it meant the sergeant could love her up close and without barriers between them. It’d surely take a while to erase the tainted memories of the past, but they had been at war for five years, and he’d happily spend another five falling in love. 

An iPhone James had recently purchased dinged with a text. 

CAPTAIN AMERICA: guess Wanda and I won’t have to sleep with our eyes open after all:)

His mouth curved into a smile, elated Steve had not only woken up but was cracking jokes over the situation he had forced Bucky into. 

WHITE WOLF: debatable. 

It was not debatable — Steve and Wanda sending the couple on a honeymoon in Maui was the best decision they could’ve made, for the moon found his sun at last. 

TAGS:

@legohe4rts @missvelvetsstuff @browneyedgirl22 @gr33nleo @thatrandomcatoverthere @fiftywhore1 @buggy14 @nt-multi-fandom @physically-im-fine @marygoddessofmischief @fuckthealarm @nyutasgirl @cjand10 @stokzr @jesterstrange @youtubersshipper @oneshotofvodkaa @emily-roberts @desert-fern @itsyellow @love-of-less @melissareadsstuff @mcucatlady @xxwritemeastoryxx @lilbloggs @ambrosia1846 @verrahigh @skittle479 @she-wolf09231982 @wholesomewhorelol @tarotwitchy-main @barnesml @arsonfrogger @stray-npc @cremebruleequeen @do-double-g @cherrywinedarling @pono-pura-vida @kandis-mom @blueberry-birdie @unaxv @notsosecretspy @buckyb-stan @desert-fern @username199945 @umadirectioner @mistressofallthingsgeeky

[lifesarchive]

OUT THERE SCREAMING edited by JORDAN PEELE (REVIEW)

quickly: the ‘horrors’ of blackness have its natural and supernatural roots revealed (bad cop with a third eye / grandma’s love is deadly / wandering man running from nothing / in vivo alien invasion / unstable ex’s / sea siren with your sister’s face / dead man’s swamp revenge / serial killer targeting black robots / white men ruining the atmosphere / daddy’s secret / chaos in the dark / part woman part fish-devil / black magic as an HOA / grief and its blindness / games that ghosts play / negro folk tales as an american requiem / prison industrial complex goes A.I. / black magic as an addiction / whiteness as psyche and psychosis)

A fantastically original collection of short horror stories that span quite a range of horror sub-genres (sci-fi, thriller, romance, and even americana). All unapologetically Black. A superb addition to the limited number of Black horror anthologies (Tales from the Hood, anyone?).

My favorites were Wandering Devil (loverboy with wandering feet can outrun everyone but himself), The Rider (a dead man intervenes on behalf of two black women traveling alone), Flicker (an intermittent darkness unleashes chaos from the shadows), The Norwood Trouble (a group of black ‘practitioners’ will be damned if white rioters try to destroy their town), A Grief of The Dead (grief separates and reunites a pair of twin brothers), Your Happy Place (an incarcerated man must decide his reality after having it stolen from him), Hide & Seek (brothers learn to protect themselves with the same magic that wants to harm them).

★★★★★ Superb.

[ladyloveandjustice]

My Favorite New Manga and Graphic Novels I Read in 2023

It's time to take a look at the comics and manga I read this year! I read  a whopping 78 manga and graphic novels in all. Here's a link to my Goodreads year in books (the manga is at the beginning, the novels start with Siren Queen) and my storygraph wrap up.

I also read 36 novels! If you want to see my favorites, check out my reviews here!

And finally, I've got the continuing manga series I've enjoyed this year here, so check that post out too!

The Magic Fish by Trung Le Nguyen

This is a tale about a first-generation Vietnamese-American boy struggling with coming out to his mother. He connects with his mother through fairytales-- she uses them to express her journey as an immigrant, and he uses them to explore his queerness and identity as a Vietnamese kid growing up in America. It's an absolutely gorgeous book full of Trung Le Nguyen's signature stunning art. The fantastical, ethereal fairy tales are weaved beautifully into the lives of the characters. The book explores how fairy tales can form connection, can express culture, can tap deeply into something real and true, and can offer tragedy and catharsis. The protagonist uses fairy tales to write his own story, and the ending is lovely and moving.

Exit Stage Left: The Snagglepuss Chronicles by Mark Russell and Mike Feehan

You may know Mark Russell from his darker, socially aware re-imagining of the Flintstones, which made quite a splash on Tumblr with this post. Well, I had pleasure of meeting him at a local convention, and I finally got his comic re-imagining of Snagglepuss, also of Hanna-Barbera. He re-imagines the titular pink puma as a closeted gay playwright in the 50's dealing with McCarthyism. It's as wild as it sounds,but also really digs into the politics of the time, the struggle of standing against oppression and how art fights through suppression and censorship. It's tragic, hopeful, poignant and full of historical references. I enjoyed it ! Definitely be cautious if you're deeply disturbed by homophobia and suicide.

The Summer Hikaru Died by Mokumokuren

A story about a teenage boy, Yoshiki, who realizes that his best friend and crush Hikaru has died and been replaced by a strange eldritch being who is imitating him. But, missing his loved one and desperate to cling to any piece of him, Yoshiki decides to keep on having a relationship with this mysterious entity. This book's horror is visceral and sublime, especially the bizarre, creepy, beautiful body horror involving the being who replaced Hikaru. It's an exploration of anxieties involving grief, relationships, and sexuality that hits just right, and the atmosphere layered with dread is top notch. I love me some messed up relationships and unknowable queer monsters, and this book delivers.

Chainsaw Man, Look Back and Goodbye Eri by Tatsuki Fujimoto

Chainsaw Man needs no introduction, but I did end up really enjoying the story of the doggy-devil boy hunting other devils. It got so tragic and intense at the end, with lots of great surreal horror imagery and darkly funny moments. I'm impressed it went so hard, though the random powers that kept piling up made what was happening hard to follow at times, especially in fights. I'm also enjoying the current weird arc starring a class-A disaster girl and the demon sharing her body.

Look Back

I really do enjoy how Fuijimoto writes messy pre-teen/teenage girls. They ring so true. The manga follows the fraught friendship between two girls as they create manga, exploring the struggle of art mixing with real relationships, and how someone keeps creating after tragedy. It's a little hard to follow at times (especially since I have to differentiate the leads based on hairstyle), but it's a good read.

Goodbye Eri

Probably my least favorite of the three, but it's a fun read- a weird ride that examines the thin line between fiction and reality in art and makes good use of Fujimoto's cinephile background and signature gaslight gatekeep girlboss characters.

Is Love the Answer? by Uta Isaki

The story follows a teenage girl, Chika, who has always struggled with not being attracted to anyone. When Chika enters college, she meets queer people all across the spectrum of asexuality, and starts exploring her own identity. As an ace, this is the best story about asexuality that I've read. It was a nuanced look at asexuality and queerness and all the variations. Chika's journey and how she found her community was moving and poignant. It's a honest, moving look at relationships and identity, and how complicated and hard to define both of those things can be. I loved the moments of Chika imagining herself as an alien to explore and cope, and how she bonded with people through magical girl shows and other geekery. My favorite new manga of the year, it really connected with me!

The Girl that Can’t Get a Girlfriend by Mieri Hiranishi

Oh girl, I've been there. This is a fun autobiographical comic about a butch4butch lesbian's struggles finding a partner in a word that favors butch/femme, and it's just an honest look at the messiness of loneliness and relationships. I also appreciate that crushing on Haruka in Sailor Moon and becoming a HaruMichi stan was the beginning the author's queer awakening because uh...same! She has taste, and is truly relatable.

Qualia the Purple: The Complete Manga Collection by Hisamitsu Ueo and Shirou Tsunashima

See my review of the light novel here for my general thoughts on the story, since it's adapted pretty faithfully. I do think the manga is overall the best experience though, because the illustrations break up the detailed explanations of quantum mechanics a bit, and it includes a bit of extra content that fleshes things out, especially withthe ending.

The Single Life: 60 year old lesbian who is single and living alone by Akiko Morishima

Just like it says on the tin, this focuses on a 60-year-old single lesbian. And definitely the shortest thing on here, since only one 30 page chapter is out.  It's a grounded story about a woman looking back on her journey to finding her identity, touching on sexism in the workplace and other challenges. It paints a portrait of a proudly gay elder who's still perfectly content being single and feels fulfilled by the life she had rather than regretting past relationships. I definitely want to see more.

Daemons of the Shadow Realm by Hiromu Arakawa

Arakawa's latest, the story is about a boy who lives in a small village with his little sister is imprisoned and has to carry out a mysterious duty...but then the village is attacked, supernatural daemons awaken, and everything he knows might be wrong. I'm enjoying this fun romp so far! It delivers an really nice plot twist right out the gate (and an excellent subversion of the usual shonen "must-protect-my-saintly-sister" narratives). It boasts Arakawa's usual fun cast and interesting world (and cool ladies). There's some slight tone and pacing issues in the first part- there's so much time spent explaining mechanics the lead doesn't really get to react to his life turning upside down. But it starts smoothing out by the second volume. I'm excited to see what's next!

Superman: Space Age by Mark Russell and Michael Allred

This is a retelling of Superman set throughout the late fifties to early eighties that has Superman interact with the political and social upheaval of the time and question his own role in things. It explored the Superman mythos through a lot of cool new angles, and has a good Lois (why yes she would break Watergate) which is how I always measure a Superman adaptation. My one complaint is, while I liked some of the things it did with Batman, the ending with the Joker was pretty weak. The ending of the overall comic will also be bizarre for anyone not uses to how weird comics can get, but I think I dug it.

#DRCL by Shin'ichi Sakamoto

A manga retelling of Dracula that focuses on Mina as the protagonist and imagines the characters at an English prep school. It adds a lot of  diversity to the characters  and has exquisite, evocative art. I'm curious where it will go and what it  intends to do with all it's changes (especially Lucy), because right now it's mostly vibes and creepiness and the direction isn't clear.

[welcome-to-green-hills]

Do you think that we’ll explore the town of Green Hills, Montana in the series and Sonic 3? Like slice of life stuff or more history? I don’t think that there’s a whole lot to the town other than it being described as a “dinky backwater town.”

Hi Honey! ❤️✨

Believe it or not, the town of Green Hills is very fruitful in its foundation! It may not feel like it, but there’s definitely a rich history of when the town was established. (Whew! Now y’all get to see how big of a nerd I am. That’s either a really good thing or a bad thing). I’ll hyperlink all of my sources/claims to specific information so y’all can review it at a later date. Hopefully, this add a bit more detail than what the Sonic Wikis have for the films.

Down below are bullet points and photos of Green Hills, Montana:

Green Hills was founded in the early 1800's by a group of explorers surveying and mapping that state of Montana. The rugged explorers took nearly 30 years in making a complete map of the state and claiming the area as home. Green Hills is located in the middle of the state and known to have fascinating geological features. The town was called "Green Hills" due to the unique shades of green found in its flora. Essentially, the town was founded by chance because it took so long to survey between 1806 to 1835.

One of the town's founders, Morgan McConnell, specifically wanted to build a town in the heart of Montana because of the area's geological feature--checkered patterns. Morgan McConnell was credited for charting nearly a quarter of the state, including the town, and coined as as THE explorer of Montana. His favorite location to sit and work at was the Devil's Pinkie (the ledge that Sonic stands at in the first and second film). Unexpectedly, McConnell fell off of the Devil's Pinkie and died. According to town legend, McConnell's name echoed through the valley ranges for hours after he died. It's unknown if these are still heard in the area today.

Between 1870 and 1883, the town of Green Hills became one of the firsts settled areas along the Northern Pacific Railway. The transcontinental railroad system stretched from the State of Minnesota, the Pacific Northwest, and along the main line opening at the Great Lakes. A town plaque describes Green Hills as a "golden spike" by former USA president Ulysses S. Grant and viewed as an important hub. The town is credited as a supply depot, as well as known for bringing in large immigration populations. The railroad system is still a crucial necessity of the town today.

The first settlers of Green Hills, Montana didn't start making their migration to the area until the 1860s. The settlers were faced with hardships of the land, lack of infrastructure, and brutal winters. Families were known to mingle together in small dwellings and form small communities. Polygamous families were common until Christian morality arrived to the area in later years (Welcome-to-Green-Hills, 2021).

Main Street features the town's first general store, a feed and gardening supply store, and post office.

Green Hills, Montana takes pride in country hospitality. The warmer months have communal events such as hoedowns, harvests and festivals, fishing derbies, farmers markets, and horseback riding events. The business district features Dr. Maddie Wachowski's veterinary clinic, antique shops, a brewery (AKA, the Beer Gardens), a stationary shop, a butcher's shop, and the Mean Bean Coffee Shop (the slogan: "drink mean"). (Tails Channel, 2021).

The Green Hills Community Theater is a town gem. It was established in 1905 and has been known to put on spectacular and successful productions for over 100 years.

The Green Hills Bulletin (the local newspaper) says that they've been the hot spot for a classic car show for the past twenty years, have a "Dog of the Week" section, a local artist guild that does mosaics for the town, recently had a worker's strike on repairing the railroad system in town, and are in the middle of a movement for accessibility laws for disabled residents.

In the first movie's novel, Green Hills is known for its massive Blueberry festivals in the fall. This is an event that's welcome to all of the farmers in the state and neighboring states. Tom is known to actively take part of the festival.

In the 1900's, the town saw an influx of United States veterans occupy the area. It's seen as a "retirement community" to those not actively serving.

The town as a population of nearly 2,000 residents, as implied by the "Welcome to Green Hills" sign at the speed trap.

There's definitely more that the town has to offer in terms of history. When I have the chance, I'll give this post some more attention and add to it. Until then, enjoy some historical facts about our Dinky Backwater Town!

[danmeiarchive]

Danmei Recs (more plot / character driven)

Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know - Cyan Wings

NovelUpdates [link] My review [link]

Every Day the Protagonist Wants to Capture Me - Qing Duan

NovelUpdates [link] My review [link]

His Little Deer Wife is Very Fierce - Little Baldy

NovelUpdates [link]

How to Survive As a Villain - Yi Yi Yi Yi

NovelUpdates [link]

Silent Reading - Priest

NovelUpdates [link] My review [link]

The General’s Vampire Omega - Little Baldy

NovelUpdates [link]

The Last Dragon in the Cultivation World - Marshmallow Bunny

NovelUpdates [link]

The Virtuous Omega Disguised as the Vicious Colonel - Little Baldy

NovelUpdates [link] My review [link]

Where is Our Agreement to be Each Other’s Arch-Rivals? - Poplar Breeze

NovelUpdates [link]

Non-Human Sub-district Office - Drunk Long Song

NovelUpdates [link]

Peerless Immortal Surrounded by Demonic Disciples - Dao Xuan

NovelUpdates [link]

Record of the Missing Sect Master - A Lifetime Of Beautiful Clothes

NovelUpdates [link]

The Whole World Is My Crematorium - 比卡比

NovelUpdates [link]

They All Say I’ve Met a Ghost - Cyan Wings

NovelUpdates [link]

A Real Man Isn’t Afraid of a Little Demon - Little Baldy

NovelUpdates [link]

My Junior Still Hasn’t Killed Me - Zi Lu

NovelUpdates [link]

Something's Not Right - Cyan Wings

NovelUpdates [link]

Today Prime Minister Also Wants to Bang His Head on the Pillar - Bazaodashe

NovelUpdates [link]

It’s Not Easy Being a Master - Jin Xi Gu Nian

NovelUpdates [link]

The Omega Can’t Pretend to Be a Beta After Accidentally Witnessing the Major General’s Susceptible Period - Fei Tang

NovelUpdates [link]

Worship Me, I Can Make You Rich - 向远飞

NovelUpdates [link]

The General Loves to Collect Little Red Flowers - Kun Cheng Xiong Mao

NovelUpdates [link]

More Danmei Recs (lighter reading / more fluff)

A Guide to Raising Your Natural Enemy - Jue Jue

NovelUpdates [link]

Transmigrated As a Villain, I Rely on Sand Sculpture to Survive - Ma Hu Zi Jun

NovelUpdates [link]

Carrying a Hoe to Cultivate - Little Baldy

NovelUpdates [link] My Review [link]

The Disabled Tyrant’s Pet Palm Fish - Xue Shan Fei Hu

NovelUpdates [link] My review [link]

After Being Turned Into a Dog, I Conned My Way Into Freeloading at My Rival’s Place - Zi Jin

NovelUpdates [link]

Number One Lazy Merchant of the Beast World - Shuishan

NovelUpdates [link]

Transmigrated as the Villain’s Cat - Xishan Fish

NovelUpdates [link]

Do You Want to Touch My Fish Tail? - 系辭上

NovelUpdates [link]

Live Broadcasting Raising Dragons in the Interstellar - Yu Zhi Shui

NovelUpdates [link]

My Vampire Faints at Blood - Three Thousand Big Dreams To Narrate One's Life

NovelUpdates [link]

The Film Emperor’s Daily Live Cooking Broadcast - 砚楚

NovelUpdates [link]

((this post will be updated as I continue reading and if I write any reviews about specific series I'll link them here too))

[eregyrn-falls-art]

Here's my 2023 Art Year in Review!

Oof. Yeah, not a great year for output. As you can tell by my having to put in some photos I took for May and October, since I didn't have any drawn art for those months. What I used for January and Sept. is definitely fudging things (in a "hmm close enough" way.)

So, here's the damage: 15 pieces total (all but one full background and color); 54 individuals.

BUT.

I'm not going to be super hard on myself, because this year is when I organized a big fan project that I'd been wanting to see get done for years and years -- the "Trouble" multi-artist lyric comic. (Art here, video version here by the amazing @stariousfalls.) As I've said before, absolutely awesome seeing 72 people step up wanting to do a big GF fan project in 2024! I was truly blown away by what a spectacular job everyone did.

And while I'm noting some of the stuff I can feel good about, I was happy to finish the Stan Twins meet the Jersey Devil comic that I'd also been meaning to finish for years.

So, not a great year personally, but some things to feel satisfied about.

Saying it here: my new year's resolution is just to DRAW SOMETHING in every month. Even just one thing!

Links below the cut.

2022, 2021, 2020, 2019, 2018, 2017

(For this year's images, I am in the process of updating the original posts with image descriptions in the image ALT text. I should have all of them done by the end of tomorrow, January 4th.)

January: Fiddleford as Disney Mirrorverse Kermit

February: GF Finale 7th Anniversary

March: Not What He Seems 8th Anniversary

April: DTIYS: Mystery Farm AU Stan and Jackie

May: (a photo I took of a sunset that I didn't even post, lol)

June: The Pines family and Paul Bunyan Day

July: My Portal Ford page for the "Trouble" lyric comic

August: A pinch-hit Stan page for the "Trouble" lyric comic (collab with @stephreynaart)

September: My polaroid for the "Trouble" lyric comic

October: Sunset photo from LBI in October

November: Fiddleford Friday - father and son fishing

December: The Pines family around a Winter Solstice campfire

Template by @mossygator

[avillanappears]

godzilla x kong: the new empire

"For most of human civilization, we believed that life could only exist on the surface of our planet. What else were we wrong about?"

okay, I kind of fell off doing this, but we’re back! the best ever tumblr review series that’s written by avillanappears.tumblr.com! I came in not expecting much, but it turns out I really, really liked it, actually! I’m more pleasantly surprised than anyone, godzilla vs kong rubbed me very much the wrong way. godzilla and kong beating the ever-loving tar out of each other was fun, sure, but I have WORDS for the human stuff. I could fill a whole post with those, probably, but we’re not talking about that! we’re thinking good thoughts, about the one I liked!

it’s definitely a fun adventure film. hollow earth was a much more fleshed out setting this time, I loved the varieties of locales and creatures. giant, flying flamingo fish that shoot electricity? kong crossing a rickety bridge made out of the spine of a monster so massive, that it’s kaiju sized compared to him? this is exactly the sort of thing I wanted to see! it was fascinating seeing kaiju sort of “on their level”, in a whole giant sized ecosystem made for them. we got some of that in the atomic time of monsters by @tyrantisterror, and I think it’s such fertile ground to explore. godzilla’s flirted with the idea before in both its netflix animes, but this is them really committing to it. it makes my worldbuilding and specbio freak heart happy. we even got to see more hellhawks! I love those guys.

lookit that face

okay this is going pretty long, but anyhoo, I liked the character stuff too. kong was as lovable as always, you really feel for the big lug. even though he’s a living god the size of a mountain, there’s a real vulnerability to him. he’s just a sad, lonely guy who wants purpose and belonging.

he and suko had some kind of fast, but still very nice bonding. the human side was fun too, they fixed a lot about what I didn’t like from the last movie. jia had more of an arc going instead of just being “the one kong talks to”, bernie was a lot more enjoyable since they cut out the weird conspiracy theorist stuff, trapper was a fun guy. it was nice just seeing someone who loves monsters and weird nature stuff.

skar king surprised me with how personal of a threat he is, they really let him feel like a horrid, nasty piece of work. he’s more than just a big evil overlord, he’s a bullying control freak who wants everything his way, and it makes his wretchedness more tangible in a way.

shimo didn’t get all that much, but I love shimo. I love her, and I can barely even tell why, there’s just some kind of Vibe to her I resonate with. I think it’s how mythical she feels. the oldest of a line of gods, a great being of ice, controlled by a wicked devil….in fact it all felt very mythic. I appreciate that, I love it when kaiju works play out like weird mythological epics.

probably the most tangible complaint I can think of right now is that the godzilla stuff was pretty underwritten. it honestly felt like he was just….doing video game sidequests or something. like, it didn’t have Impact up until the very end when he finally meets kong and SPOILERS SPOILERS. and it feels a shame to kill scylla and tiamat off this early, I liked those two as unpredictable wildcards. with rodan and the others still mia, and two titans unceremoniously dead, it’s starting to feel like the monsterverse is sorta….flattening itself? now that kongs arc is done, I think we need to get back to a godzilla solo or two, flesh things back out a bit. but that’s for future peter to talk about, today we’re leaving things off on a high note. fun characters, dynamic locales, some great monster brawling, this one was a good’un!

godzilla cast monkeys into hell for their sins

[somaspice]

Disillusion, an Oneiric Dungeon Crawler

Disillusion, and its sequel DisillusionST, are games I've been following intently, ever since I found out about them on a niche vaporwave forum three years ago.

The sequel is still in the works, but recently has garnered quite a bit of attention as Vinesauce played it on stream. Such attention is well deserved, as the dev's artstyle has come into his own, and the game showcases many extremly charming vingnettes reminiscent of early 2000s point and click games.

However, for this post, I'd like to focus on the original work. While Disillusion is much more primitive in every aspect compared to the demo of ST, it still manages to be a very worthwile experience.

As flawed as it might be because of it's janky combat and color-vomit art direction, the execution of it's main concepts is still very worthy of praise.

In the original game we play as Golem, an amnesiac soul climbing a tower with the intent of achieving either nirvana or reincarnation.

(My interpretation of the MC, made in Blender)

As it turns out, there are many wayward souls in the same journey. Most of them, however, have become lost and succumbed to insanity, as the more time one spends in the tower the more one's memories begin to meld with everyone else's.

In our travels we meet and become allies with Melpomene, the muse of tragedy. She asks for our help in defeating Mara, the buddhist version of the devil, who has perched itself on top and trapped all of the wayward souls. She intends to use the tower to transform itself into a god and remake the universe in it's image.

As for the game itself it is mostly a silly, psychedelic romp through a kaleidoscopic dungeon. Even though it's main themes are spiritual and introspective, the game is mostly meant to be fun and light.

For example, there is a sidequest where in you have to smuggle sweet corn for the obese monarch of a fish kingdom.

Because of this, the game can go from an off kilter-joke to something quite somber in the span of minutes.

It's definitely weird, but it adds to the experience in my opinion.

Wanting to truly immerse myself (and make some fun content), I asked the dev the recipe for one of the game's healing items, a PBJ sandwich. PBJ stands for pickled pork, beans, and jelly. It's supposed to cure poison.

I cooked it up and felt a bit poisoned afterwards.

In any case, if you want to hear my full thoughts and see my culinary experience, you can check it out in the video review on my youtube channel.

See ya next time.

[canmom]

Indika (title puns? sorry i got nun)

I played that game that got a bunch of hype a few months back! Created by exiled Russian devs Odd Meter and published by the absolutely on top of their game right now 11Bit Studios, it's a uniquely AESTHETIC orthodoxcore meditation on religion and nihilism that has more than a little Tarkovsky flavour. If you've seen any review of this game you probably know the score: splendid writing and blending of aesthetic registers, spaced out by rather more orthodox (ha ha) game puzzle design.

It's very much a setpiece driven game, leading you through a series of absolutely gorgeously rendered snowy, industrial environments of increasingly surreal size, all carrying a three-way dialogue between Indika (a nun who hears the voice of the devil in her ear and seems to be experiencing some kind of psychosis), Ilya (an escaped convict who's convinced God is leading him to some great purpose, if only he can heal his rotting sepisy arm) and the devil (who only Indika can hear, cutting in with sardonic commentary every so often).

So it's a story about becoming disillusioned with religion and shaking off moralism, about desperation, about ostracisation - and a very confident one at that, full of great presentation and acting choices and provocative events.

I think the interesting question with this is like, what does it gain from being a game, rather than e.g. a movie or even a play - or for that matter a 'walking simulator' game with no challenges at all? The puzzles don't really factor into it, they mostly function as a speedbump... except, of course, that running into blatant videogame puzzles adds to the sense of unreality that is given by the strangely towering architecture and giant fish and so on, acting consonant with the chiptune/EDM in the soundtrack, the 2D pixel-art flashbacks and especially the mechanical representation of Indika's faith as a pixellated point tracker which incrementally ticks up for every religious act, a device which pays off in the final scene.

So - much like NieR, it likes to play around with the imagery of previous eras of game as symbols. The benefits of being a game are then in a sense mostly aesthetic invocations - but it does make interesting use of them, e.g. a monster-chase sequence unexpectedly seguing into an argument with the devil about the different motives of humans and animals as the camera rolls to follow the defeated boss around a water wheel.

Honestly, the camerawork in this game is really something special - making all sorts of clever uses of curved lenses and striking compositions that really allow you to feel the weight of the environments. Besides the well-shot cutscenes, you can sit on benches in various places and switch through a series of striking camera angles. But equally, you get a far stronger sense of the moody setpieces when you are walking through them to figure out a path, compared to if you simply saw them in the background of an establishing shot.

There is also the matter of taking the characters and environment, which you might take for granted in a film, and drawing them into the realm of something constructed. To film a real convent covered in snow is one thing; to meticulously build snow shaders which respond to footfalls and perfectly convey the sparkling mushy texture of melting snow is perhaps a different statement, much as animated a movement and filming it conveys different emphases. Perhaps this is just the tech artist talking, but a significant part of the expression comes in walking around as Indika and observing the wind catching her wimple and the carefully designed ways she stumbles and fidgets. So yeah yeah, the medium is still the goddamn message.

Environment design and rendering seem to be real strong points for Odd Meter - sure, anyone can take the off the shelf engine features of Unreal, but it takes a lot of skill to really make it sing cohesively. Their previous game is a VR archery game called Sacralith, and while it doesn't seem to have the same artistic ambitions as Indika, I'm terribly curious to try it out now.

Definitely recommend giving this one a look. It's a pretty digestible four hours to play, so basically two movies. Which feels appropriate for this type of strongly narrative-focused game - very much for short focused games these days...

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Monday October 28 - Tuesday October 29

Willow: Thanks for having me over, Buffy. Especially on a school night and all. Buffy: No problem. Hey, sorry about your fish. Willow: Oh, it's okay. We hadn't really had time to bond yet. Although for the first time I'm glad my parents didn't let me have a puppy.

~~Buffy Episode #29: "Passion" ~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Lingual Downtime (Willow, Xander, T, Devil May Cry xover) by madimpossibledreamer

Team Bonding (Willow, Xander, T, Devil May Cry xover) by madimpossibledreamer

Certain Admissions (Riley Finn/Buffy Summers, T) by captainamergirl

Sea Change (Pike/Buffy, G) by StrictlyNoFrills

The Family Itch (Spike, Angel, G) by Higgystar

temporary tattoo (Rupert Giles/Buffy Summers, M) by Skyson

V for Victory (Buffy Summers, Rupert Giles, Xander Harris, G) by Callarose_aka_FireDragon

Sacrifice (Angel/Spike, G) by MistressKat

Betrayal by omission (Buffy/Spike, T) by JSBirsa

Oh My Goddess, Chapter 9 (Buffy/Spike, M) by Maxine Eden

Tricked, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Maxine Eden

[Chaptered Fiction]

What's in a Soul Ch. 1 (Spike/Buffy Summers, T) by Iris_Dietrich

Hope is the thing with feathers Ch. 14 (Buffy/Spike, E) by wildflowerr_wildfire

Near to the Wild Heart Ch. 8 (Buffy/Spike, M) by toooldforthis_ef

Aegis Ch. 28 (Xander, T, multiple xovers) by dogbertcarroll, Narsil

I was a Zombie for the FBI Ch. 1-2/2 (COMPLETE) (Buffy/Spike, T) by Callarose_aka_FireDragon

Whoa! Not What I Expected! Ch. 6 (Xander, T, NCIS xover) by danu40k

What If Love Was Enough? Ch. 1-17/17 (COMPLETE) (Spike/Buffy, E) by Spikelover4ever

Fury of the Fallen, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, E) by CheekyKitten

reciprocity, Chapter 15 (Buffy/Spike, E) by HappyWhenItRains

Near to the Wild Heart, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, M) by toooldforthis

Just Two Lost Souls, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Holly

Nemesis, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, E) by scratchmeout

Not Ready to Make Nice, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, E) by tragic

One Loop at a Time, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, E) by hydranjenna

A Bite After Midnight, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Maxine

Always, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Spikelover4ever

The Neighbor's Point of View, Chapter 142 (Buffy/Spike, G) by the_big_bad

Perfect Clarity, Chapter 6 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Ragini

The Science of Being Yours, Chapter 5 (Buffy/Spike, E) by ClowniestLivEver

Blood and Fame, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Desicat

Psyer Ch. 10 (Xander, T, Psyren xover) by JoshuAB

It Started in Oxnard - How it All Began Ch. 13 (Xander/Tara, E, Highlander xover) by redjacobson

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork:Chosen One (Buffy) by glitch-h

Video: buffy the vampire slayer - this is war by Giulia Wonderwall

[Reviews & Recaps]

PODCAST: BTVS 605 - Life Serial by Another Buffy Podcast

PODCAST: The Yoko Factor by Buffy the Vampire Straya

PODCAST: Episode 47 - Death by Grape Soda (The Zeppo) by The Sunnydale Diaries

[Community Announcements]

Tuesday Prompts: Monsters & Magic by comment_fic

[Fandom Discussions]

How could the Shanshu Prophecy NOT have been about Spike in Chosen? by violettathepiratequeen

This is a Kendra headcanon that I like a lot but that I’m not sure will ever make it into anything I’m writing. by coraniaid

btvs 6x04 willow & giles kitchen conversation is so good it makes me feel so insane. by lesbianmarrow

For today’s fic back Friday, I wanted to recommend the fic To Live In The World by IvorySteel92. by noratilney

Why was Ethan Rayne such a wimp? by burrunjor

My alternative season 7 by hoponlilmama

Titles of episodes in English and other languages by Antho

Anybody find the “potential” melodrama and the squatting towards the end of Season 7 sort of unfit and strangely funny? by KENZOKHAOS

Season 6x18 Entropy by anon63171

I really loved the frenemy relationship of Buffy and Cordelia ! by Cailly_Brard7

What band plays at the Bronze in S6E6 "All the Way?" by Putrid_Humor4834

Did I Spoiler Buffy for a Friend? by aperturecake

Buffy season 7 by Prudent_Border5060

Would Buffy/Faith have been more interesting than Willow/Tara? by jogaforacont

Rewatching Buffy... Again by ALWS_0rweLL

S2E3 School Hard by Unimatrix_Zero_One

Just had a Buffy shower thought (season 6 spoilers) by jaduhlynr

Need Help Finding A Giles "Brain Bleach" Quote I Think Maybe Exists... by NikkolasKing

buffy the vampire slayer - this is war by buffy the vampire slayer - this is war

buffy the vampire slayer - this is war by buffy the vampire slayer - this is war

The most horrific thing in Buffy... *spoilers* by InternationalTeam605

Superstar hidden Easter egg spoilers for season 6 by soybeansms

S2 ep8 of Angel??? by Dismal_Present_8993

Loving all the late 90's/early 2000's fashion in my current Buffy rewatch by WerewolfBarMitzvah09

Do you think they were going for a love triangle in season 2 but decide not to ? by Cailly_Brard7

I Wish the Demon Had Finished off the Trio in "Flooded" by NikkolasKing

Disharmony episode... fun parts & newfound insights by sirtch_analyst

What's your favorite interaction between Spike and a character whose last name isn't Summers? by InfiniteMehdiLove

Does anyone ever think… by Kat-Attack-52

The board game by Anuk_Su_Namun

Slaying It Podcast? by becky119

So... Jasmine. by yukeee

Vampire martial arts by taylorscrews1

season 3 episode 2…. by thunpnz

One set of foils I think people sleep on a bit is Amy and Tara: by DeaththeEternal

Once more, With Feeling by Fuzzy-Reference1061

General Buffy to Chosen by Moon_Logic

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

PUBLICATION: Amber Benson looks back on 'Buffy's game-changing queer couple by Out Magazine

PUBLICATION: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Perfected the Halloween Episode With “Fear, Itself” by Den of Geek

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Join the editor team :)

[blizzardfluffykpop]

Partners

Summary: The two partners in crime that did everything together as a team for the team, were finally separated.

Oneshot

Fluff, Angst w/a happy ending, Mafia au, Hurt/comfort au

Trigger Warnings: Guns, Knives, Rescuing a spider or two, Murder, Death/Dying mentions, No main character or member death, Damnation, and Mentions of Drugs (none used or sold by reader).

Word Count: 5,582

Younghoon X Reader

[A/n: If my friend; @jinkoh never put this in my mind, my first fanfiction for the boyz probably would have probably been sweet and fluffy. Here we are… Anyways, after a few years of saying I’d write about them, now I have. And yes, of course, the reader had to be a badass. I'm still new to their personalities, so I am sorry if the characterization is off!! Fun fact: this fic starts on the same word it ends on: Another]

------

Another day, another successful mission. Your team was able to find another one of your rival's hideouts and kill off several of the dealers. You high-five Younghoon as you climb out of your lookout together. He lands first on the ground. He waits for you to jump and steadies you after you hop down. You thank him before telling him, “We're such a lethal team.” He grins, and you make it to the getaway car and sit in the back with him. He speaks first, “The shot you pulled off back there?” You hum as you smirk, “Yeah?” He smiles, “I can’t believe you managed to shoot that guy in the head! We were so far away from him!” You laugh and go, “What about you? Mr. I pulled off the ending shot. You killed the guy who we’ve been after for months!” He smirks, “I did, didn’t I?” You both laugh, and Sunwoo goes, “You lovebirds done? I almost got my ass kicked back there.” You roll your eyes, and Younghoon goes, “You’re just jealous 'cause Youngjae bested a big opponent in hand-to-hand combat.” “You two saw where I was and couldn’t kill the guy for me?” You shrug, “If you didn't have it under control, he would have been shot by us.” Younghoon continues, “We had bigger fish to fry anyway.” Sunwoo rolls his eyes, and Youngjae is the last to hop into the vehicle, “Alright, who’s ready for ramen!?” You all grin and yell, “Me!”

You all laugh as you eat a hearty meal before retiring to your rooms. You hold the door open for Younghoon, and he follows you in, groaning, “I’m ready to retire for the night.” You laugh, “Me too.” You wash up first before letting him have the bathroom. You hear a cry of, “Why is it always me?!” And you knock, and he goes, “S-Spider!” You laugh and open the door, and he covers up with the shower curtain, pointing and cowering away from the bug. “You may be a skilled sniper. But you certainly can’t take out a bug.” He pouts, and you smile, “I mean it kindly.” He nods, and you trap the bug and go, “I’m going to run this little guy outside.” He shivers, “Ew.” And before you exit, he goes, “For a person who shows no mercy to the devils, you certainly are gentle to bugs.” You shake your head and laugh as you leave and let the spider out of the balcony window before locking it back up.

The following morning, Sangyeon calls for a meeting. It starts well, reviewing your success of the last year. Before he sighs, “I’ve been thinking about this for a while. And how we’ve been trying to eliminate our rival. And after several talks with Kevin, I’ve decided what course of action to take.” Sangyeon locks eyes with each of you, “We’re going to have to take drastic measures to end this once and for all.” You all wait for him to elaborate, and he says, “(Y/n), I’d hate to burden you with this. But you’re our keyholder. You’ll be the one to infiltrate the devils.” You couldn’t believe your ears as he continued to talk. You felt someone grab your hand and hold it tightly under the table, and you squeezed it back, reassuring him that it was okay.

Sangyeon says, “We’ll talk further. But for now, that’s what I’ve decided.” You nod, “Okay.” Younghoon immediately protests in your favor, his hand leaving yours, but you know it won’t change anything. Sangyeon has made his decision, and while he was lenient. When something favored the team, it was more important than the individuals. Not that he would assign any of you anything outside of your capabilities. Younghoon slams his hands onto the tabletop, “We’re always together! I’m (Y/n)’s partner in crime!” Sangyeon’s lips pull into a firm line, “I know. I’m sorry. But (Y/n)’s our best bet. And as much as I’d love to send Chanhee who’s always behind the scenes. He’s not a skilled marksman, like you and (Y/n).” You were the team’s sniper and weapons specialist, along with Younghoon. He begs, “Send me instead.” And you have to fight your tears as he pleads. Sangyeon shakes his head, “I can’t. They know your face when you tripped that wire when you went on that solo mission eight months ago.” Younghoon groans, and Sangyeon looks at you, “You understand, right?” You hold your voice as steady as possible, “I do…” And Younghoon looks at you, baffled before he sees the tears in your eyes. And Sangyeon leaves the room with the rest of the team to give you both time to think it over.

Younghoon waits until the door clicks before he pulls you up and into his arms. “I know you’re capable. But I don’t want you to go.” You blink back your tears, “Unlike you, I’ve never been without you on a mission. What if I’m not as good without you?” He shakes his head at you, with tears brimming his eyes, “You’ve always been better than me. You never miss a shot. You’ve always been careful. And I know without me, you’ll be okay.” You wrap your arms around him, “I don’t want to go without you even though I have to.” He makes sure you’re looking him in the eyes before he says, “I have to tell you something.” You wait for him as he takes a deep breath, “You’re my partner in crime, right…” You give him a small smile, “Always.” He searches your eyes as he whispers, “I’ve always wanted you more than that. Not just in crime, I want you to be my life partner.” Your tears finally spill over at his confession. “I-I-” He shakes his head, “You don’t have to say anything back. I um- I just needed to tell you.” You cry as you finally say, “I want you too. You’ve always been my partner in more ways than I ever admitted.”

You wipe his tears as he wipes yours. You smile, “The rest of them have always called us lovebirds, it’s about time we make it true.” He laughs and agrees. Before placing his hands on either side of your cheeks and kissing you, as you quickly kiss back. You stay like that for a moment. You pull away and search his eyes, noticing the tears rolling down his cheeks. And you tell him, “I mean it, I love you.” He lays his forehead against yours, “I love you too.”

---

It’s the last day you'll be here, for a short while, you hope. You hug them all goodbye. It was hard to part with them after being with them for eight years of your life. Even with tears threatening to fall, they each do their best to make you laugh as they tell you goodbye. Hyunjae hugs you last, “You’ve always out-skilled me in marksmanship. When you return, we’ll compete, and I'll win, okay?” You laugh, “My ass you’ll win!” He winks, “I guess you’ll just have to prove me wrong when you return!” They all scoot back as you approach your partner. Your tears race forward as you see his tearful eyes. He pulls you into him and hides his face into your neck for a few minutes, just taking it all in, that this would be the last time you’d hug either for a long time or forever. You hold him to you, not wanting to go just as much as he didn’t want to let you go.

“I should have told you about my feelings sooner.” You cup his cheeks, “It’s okay.” Your tears are streaming down your cheeks as he chokes back sobs, “I know you can do it. But what if… What if I waited all this time… Just for it to be too late.” You shake your head at him, and he holds you tighter in his arms, “What if you die out there and I never told you I loved you.” You sniffle, “But you did. And I love you too, don’t you dare forget that.” He cries, and you lift his chin and pull his lips to yours. After a brief kiss, you tell him, “Then it won’t be all for naught. If we live, we’ll be safe. And if not, we’ll at least die knowing we felt the same for each other.” He pulls his lips from yours and shakes his head at you, “How I wish these were different circumstances.” You laugh as you wipe your nose on a handkerchief, “Me too. But that’s why when I leave. I’ll be damned and determined to make it back to you.” He locks eyes with you, and you smile, “I’ll do everything to meet you on the other side. I’m damned to have you by my side.” You kiss his nose, and you both start to pull away when he whispers, “Are you sure I can’t bar you from leaving?” You giggle and whisper back, “Sangyeon would have your head.” He laughs, “It’d be worth it.” You wipe your eyes before shaking your head at him. You kiss him one last time before pulling away.

You sigh as you take one last look at the world you grew to love. They’re all waving goodbye, and Younghoon is waving with tears streaming down his eyes. You give them the bravest smile you can. And with a wave, you disappear into the night.

---

It’s been a year since then, and you’re still in this damn place, waiting for the perfect moment to strike and get this over. All you wanted to do was to return to be by Younghoon’s side. While you were doing this for the team and you to be safe. You were also doing everything you could to thin out the mafia from the inside. From sending the crew out at the wrong place and time or committing inside jobs to move up higher in the rankings. And since you had help from the outside. The number of coworkers you have every day is less. Now, you're the kingpin's bodyguard, and when you're not guarding him, you're the head of patrol.

Your mind is in other places while standing beside your boss. You have to stay strong for not only yourself but your partner and friends. You straighten up as you imagine what shenanigans you'd be doing. Maybe Hyunjae and you'd be pranking Sangyeon. Or you'd be in your shared room cuddling with Younghoon. Holding him to you as you run your fingers through his hair. Your mind is drawn back to your boss, who is chattering about something he wants acknowledged.

He's telling you about his latest fling, and you're resisting your recoil of disgust as you nod along to him. When he finally shuts up, you go back to daydreaming. Maybe this time, unlike before, you'd share the bed instead of just a room. Perhaps you two would buy a queen-sized mattress, plop it in the middle of the room to share, and you'd be happy. You'd still have to go out and deal with the various missions. But at least it would be alongside Younghoon again. After all, it has only been a year and some months since you’ve confessed. You both didn’t know if you’d come back alive, and you’re wondering if you ever will. You’re still waiting for a sign that they’re ready.

Your mind goes back to the first few months. It wasn’t easy infiltrating the system, but you acted swiftly, getting in on training sessions in their gyms until they started to recognize you more. And then, one day, you ‘accidentally’ caught them exercising their crimes: exchanging drugs in plain daylight. So, of course, they had to make sure you kept quiet by dragging you in further. After all, you were already in their gym 24/7. What was another hour? You acted as if you didn’t know how to shoot a gun and went up the ranks rather quickly with your skills that seemed to them as natural talent. What they didn’t realize is that you weren’t naturally rising in the ranks like they thought. After two months of being the head of the patrol, you rose artificially to the main bodyguard after he mysteriously died. Now it was only a matter of time before you’d get alone with the boss without fearing interruptions from staff and fellow guards. You still had three other bodyguards to take care of. And it was still risky to kill them all when you didn’t have the signal yet.

---

You're up late, retiring to your single room after finishing your shift for the night. When you get a text from an unknown number, “New to Deobi.” Your eyes light up as you hide under your covers to text back, “How did you get my number?”

New: You know I have my ways. Your rank?

You: Main bodyguard

New: Good

New: Two days

You: No way

New: Yes, way. Now, get to bed. We got our side under control.

You giggle, almost too giddy to fall asleep. Soon you’ll be out of here. You just had to get rid of the others, an easy feat after knowing how strict everyone’s schedules were with a man who needed guarding 24/7. All you need Chanhee to do is disconnect the internal alarm system. And it was smooth sailing from there. With it still on, your boss can send out a distress signal to authorities or fellow mafias. And you couldn't risk that happening.

—Meanwhile, on the other side—

Younghoon is outside of the kingpin’s bar, just doing his nightly stroll. When one of the goons comes out talking shit about everyone in their rival's group and how the job sucked. And how his fellow bodyguards were even worse, always ordering him around, “Don’t even get me started on the piece of work that's (Y/n)!” The guy groans as he goes on about you and the other guards. How dare he talk about you like that? Without a second thought, he has his gun to his head, “No, continue. See how far that gets you.” The guy gulps, “Why would you even care? You’re in our rival’s mafia.” And he smirks as he cocks it back, “Why shouldn't I?” And that’s the last thing the goon ever hears. Younghoon drags him around to the back of the bar. He pulls the guy’s gun out, unloads the bullets, and sets the gun down beside him. He shoves the remaining ones into his pocket, fiddling with them as he walks around the bar. Even if they saw him shoot the guy, there’s not much they can do, considering how thinned out they’ve become.

It killed him to have to let you go since you had fallen into the world a few weeks after him. From then, you were always together, both of you learning the world together. Sangyeon told the two of you that while you were a team, the two of you would be partners in marksmanship. Combined, your skills had outranked the rest. Which wasn’t an easy feat, considering Changmin had been the former sniper. He stepped down happily to be on field work.

Not only were you two skilled marksmen, but you became weapon specialists together. You two would stay up in your shared room, learning about artillery together and fashioning your own. It was weird to return home and not have you there beside him. And when he’d roll over to say good night to you. You weren't there on your side to say goodnight. He misses staying up with you for hours when he found you still awake. The two of you would talk about everything and nothing at all.

The absence of you ate him away. He shoved his mind into missions, doing everything to not think about you not being by his side. Even when he’d make a shot and look for you to high-five, he'd remember you weren't there. He felt empty from the inside out. The rest of his members did everything they could to comfort him. But none of them were you.

You were his partner. And when he finally got to have you as his life partner. You had to leave. He should have confessed sooner. He had so many opportunities to tell you. He could have slipped it out when you’ve finished an enemy off, telling you that he’s never seen someone make shooting a gun look so hot. But whenever he went to say them back then, it never felt like the right time, let alone the right words. It never felt right to tell you until you were about to slip away forever. He pushed himself deeply into work, and the others couldn’t do anything but try to work faster to get you back. Younghoon was shaving time left and right by killing their goons just because they looked at him funny.

Maybe it was best that you couldn't see how low he went without you. Or how little care he took of himself. But back when you were together. Whenever one of you got hurt, you were always there to patch the other up. If either of you were feeling under the weather, you’d stay by each other’s side. If you weren’t able to go, he wasn’t either. Changmin could always pick up your guy's slack. He wouldn’t leave your side when you caught the flu and took care of you even though Chanhee and Jacob yelled at him more times than he could count for staying in the same room as you while you were sick. But you'd do the same for him in a heartbeat.

The reality he grew so comfortable with is out of his grasp. He misses how you’d jump into action the second he’d shriek and take the bugs he was scared of outside. Now, as a spider spins a web in the corner of the shower, and he screams for you to get it. He sadly remembers you're not coming to his rescue. He sighs dejectedly, heading to shower in a different bathroom. It was so lonely without you. Even though he had his brothers, he didn’t have you. He missed you terribly, just like you missed him.

---

The next day, as Younghoon doom scrolls, a knock comes on his door. Suspecting another mission, he rolls his eyes as he opens the door, but it’s not Juyeon, who usually doles them out. It’s Sangyeon. He moves back to let him in, “Yeah?” Sangyeon sighs, “I thought a lot about how to put this.” Younghoon waits and sits on his bed. Sangyeon stands, knowing better than to sit on your perfectly made bed, “In two days, this can go south very fast or end up in our favor. But we’ve thinned them out enough. And with Chanhee finally being able to hack into (Y/n)’s burner. We’re right at the precipice.” Younghoon gapes at him, “What?” He nods, “I know you wish to contact (Y/n)… But it’s not possible.” Younghoon sighs, “I didn't expect to. But two days? That's all we have left?” Sangyeon gives him a tight-lipped smile, “Yeah if everything goes right, we'll be home free.” He pauses before he says, “And I know you’re not a believer. But I’ve prayed that it’s all worked out. I want you to believe in us, (Y/n), and yourself even more now.” Younghoon nods, “I always do.” Sangyeon clasp his hand over his, “Especially now, okay?” He nods, “I promise.” And Sangyeon squeezes his hand one last time before getting up, “Come down for lunch, and we’ll have bigger plans to discuss.”

—Back to the devil’s headquarters—

You text Chanhee one last thing, “The alarms.” While Chanhee had it automatically deleting your messages off of the network, you deleted the texts off your device. You control your features into a deep frown, knowing if you give yourself a chance, you’ll be smiling with glee. You’re partially through your shift when he goes, “My alarms aren’t working! No one is reporting to me from the kitchens!” Your boss orders you to get their attention, “I’ll have someone come out this weekend for it. For now, I’ll use you four as my messengers. Quickly now.” You resist rolling your eyes, knowing you just had less than twenty-eight hours before all this was over. You go to the kitchen and order them to move it like he would so he can have his precious dinner. As you head back, you are thankful that Chanhee took out the alarms on your shift so your ‘boss’ didn't think you had something to do with it.

After the server brings in the meal and retreats back to the kitchen, another one of the guards comes in, “I’ve been looking all over, sir. And I can’t find Choi anywhere.” The royal fucker goes, “Where was he last?” “Probably one of your bars?” “Well, what are you waiting for? He's next on duty.” He rolls his eyes and looks at you, “Can you believe these imbeciles? Not being able to report for duty on time.” You shake your head, “No, sir. It’s painful to think someone would ditch their duties to drink through the night. I would never do such a thing.” He nods and pats your shoulder, “You never have. You never let me down. Always punctual and always there at my beck and call.” You agree, “Always.”

You don’t speak another word as he eats. It’s not for another hour until your fellow bodyguard returns, “I’ve come to report that Choi has passed.” He rolls his eyes, “Ugh, great, another one. You’re up for duty next, then.” “Yes, sir.” He shoos you away, “You’re dismissed.” You give him a nod before turning on your heel and marching out as your fellow guard replaces your spot. As you open the door, you politely say, “Good night, sir.”

You were giddy as you got ready for bed. One day, that’s all you have before you’re reunited with your best friends and partner. The worst year of your life would finally be over. And while there was no guarantee it’d be any better, at least you’d finally be able to take on the world with Younghoon again. The love of your life, you've done your best to stay alive to see him again. Having several close encounters, especially when you caught them in that drug deal in the first place. If you didn't suck up and beg to join them, you wouldn't have the chance to go back home. And now, with the day in your grasp, you can't wait for tomorrow, no matter what happens. You eat your dinner in your room as you always do on your duty nights and settle into sleep. You’d need a good night’s rest if you’d wish to pull off an impossible feat.

You wake up with a big stretch, wiping your eyes. You couldn’t help but feel glee, even though the worst part of the mission was today. You were about to return home. While everything could go south today, you were determined to pull through. You flick through your mind your plan, the last plan that Sangyeon, Kevin, and Haknyeon gave you. The priority being to get out alive after killing off the kingpin. The other men were secondary. They’d be helping you from the outside and inside. Ensuring no one that goes in comes out again.

You knew the patrol was weak because when you weren’t protecting his highness. You guarded the gate with only one person guarding the front door. Unlike when you first started, there were ten of you on guard. While your next kill is secondary, you know it'll save your ass in the end. You formulated the scheme months ago. All you'd have to do is kill off the guard on duty you were supposed to wake up and take his place as the main guard instead of heading to your scheduled location at the gate for the day. Now, it would be even easier for your team to get inside.

You shake off your grin and control your features into a perfect poker as you’ve done for the past year. You walk out of your room after arming yourself to code. You head to your fellow guard’s room. Again, you were supposed to wake him for his shift. You slip in and lock the door behind you. He starts waking up with a stir, and you shake your head, whispering, “Go back to bed. I'll take your shift.” You wait for him to settle back into sleep before you bring your knife up, and embed it into him, “I’ve always heard it’s better to pass in your sleep. Have good dreams.” You graciously lift a second blanket at the end of the bed over him, concealing the knife embedded in him.

You clean your hands in the attached bathroom and lock the bedroom door behind you. You head over to your boss’ room, and after scanning your eyeball, the door opens. And see him getting dressed for the day. You tell him, “I’d much rather serve today, sir.” He squints, “Why’s that?” “Well, I’d like Saturday off. It’s my birthday.” He nods, “I see. Why have you never mentioned it before?” You smile, “Well, I was too busy committing my life to your cause that I didn’t think of myself until it was right upon us.” He grins, “I admire that. You may trade shifts.” You hold your smile back. You just got away with murder, which will be his fatal mistake. Through the door, you tell your deceased coworker you’re taking his shift. He doesn’t reply, and no one thinks a second thought.

You lead your boss to his office, as you always do. He fiddles with his papers, “You'd think fentanyl would be selling better, considering how new this drug is.” You nod. He never wanted you to give him a reason, just wanted you to acknowledge his reports. You listen to him drown out as he flips through his papers. Like every day for the past year since meeting him, you’re resisting rolling your eyes. You always found it interesting how he’d always send people to complete missions but not go out on them. How interesting that as the kingpin, he'd never carry a gun and always have a bodyguard around him 24/7 unless he was in his inner bedroom.

Even then, the only way to enter the master suite was by scanning your eyes. His actual bedroom was off-limits to everyone, even his flings. He had an extra bed in the first room for such occasions. He didn’t trust anyone with the code, scared of dying in his sleep. And because of that, there were several to enter that room. One of which was a tongue scan. It was the safest place to be in the entire house, but you planned for that. You weren't going to let him escape to it.

However, you’d think he’d be smart enough to wear a bulletproof vest, which he required his employees to wear. Or at least carry a weapon better than the brass knuckles he always wore. While he was street smart, he certainly wasn’t home security intelligent. Considering you were right under his nose. And that would be his downfall. You hear a loud crash, and your eyes go wide as you reach for your gun. Your boss rolls his eyes, “You’d think those lousy chefs would know better than to be quiet while I was working.” You nod. Sure, that’s what that noise was, and not your friends breaking and entering. You move your hand from your gun, but your hand never parts from your side, knowing what's next to come.

It goes silent again, and that’s how it remains for the next hour. Until another crash sounds, “Because the alarms are out until Saturday. Yell out to them to knock it off.” And so you do. You open the door and yell for them to knock it off. You shut it and stand at your post just for the guard who was supposed to guard the front door rushed inside, “We’re under attack!” It’s not you who gasps it’s your boss who goes, “Fuck. I have to get out of here.” He shoos out the other guard, telling him to wake everyone else.

You rush to the door and lock it, “What’s the plan?” He sighs, “I can't get to my room in time. And I don't know if they're rigging bombs, so we’re going down the passage.” You tilt your head, “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” “Why’s that?” “Pretty sure, the boyz have already sealed it off.” “No one except for me knows where the passage ends. They couldn't possibly have.” You feel the smirk grow on your face before you can hold it back, he’s at your throat. Pulling you up by your collar, “I always had a sneaking suspicion that you were someone else. But I never had the proof.” You smirk, “Exactly. You let me in, not knowing my background.” He slams you against the door, knocking the air out of your lungs for a second. He sputters as he thinks, “But you-you’ve never gone outside of your quarters, I would know.” You laugh, “You’re right. I never did, never had to. We already planned out how to take you down.” He slams you again, and you hold back your groan, not giving him the satisfaction, thankful for the cushion that the vest provided.

You move your hand while he’s concentrating, “You never were smart, huh?” You grab your gun, put it against his stomach, and pull the trigger, “You should have reached for my gun when you had the chance.” He drops you from his hold. You’re glad your bulletproof vest prevented your shirt from choking you. He gasps, “You son of a bitch. I damn you to hell.” You shrug as he coughs up blood, “Oh well, you’ll be there first.” He heaves another breath, muttering something at you, and you sigh as you wait for him to bleed out. When his body freezes, you finally move. The hardest part is finally over, but you aren’t out of the woods yet.

You lean your ear against the door, listening for anyone outside, hearing nothing, you open the door. You quickly make your way to your room. You grab your last few pieces of artillery out of the room, knowing the boyz had probably already cleaned the place out. But you still don’t hear anything. It’s eerily silent until you hear a gunshot. You gasp as you rush out, and on the ground, you see the bodyguard who informed your newly deceased boss you were under attack. “Damn, someone beat me to him.”

That’s when you hear someone say, “(Y/n)?” You snap your head towards the voice, and there he is, the man you’d wait for centuries to see again, “Younghoon?” He grins, and you don’t think twice, dropping the spare pistol you were holding before rushing into his arms, “You’re here!” He smiles, tears pricking his eyes, “They barred me from coming in at first. But I couldn’t let you have all the fun.” You laugh as your tears come out, and he asks, “Did you do it?” You nod, and he kisses the top of your head, “I knew you could.” You both wipe your eyes, “One final sweep together?” He nods, “Let’s go.” You clear the wing you’re in, and he holds you tight to his side after you pick up your spare, “I already did a sweep of the rest of the building.” You nod, “Before or after Jacob did?” He laughs, “After.” You laugh as he moves a hand into his jacket. He pulls out his two-way radio, “You want to call it?” You shake your head, “Together?” He smiles and turns it on, holding the receiver down. And in unison, you go, “All clear.” He lets go of the button when you hear Youngjae’s voice for the first time in a whole year, “Fuck yeah! Bring it on outside, you two!” You both laugh, and he goes, “Let’s never do a mission like this again.” You sigh, “I couldn’t agree more.”

You kiss his cheek, “I’m so excited to be back home and be with you.” He grins, “Me too.” He kisses your forehead, “Let’s go home.”

And there, you returned to your routine of rescuing your lover from bugs, with him talking with you on your queen-sized mattress until you fell asleep. It was everything you daydreamed of. While you still went on missions, you no longer separated from each other. While, apart from each other, you were incredible assets to the team, but together you’re unstoppable. Now you can finally breathe again.

---

He kisses you after you shoot another bull's eye, beating Hyunjae in your mini-competition. Younghoon says, “Did anyone ever tell you that you look hot when you fire a gun?” You giggle as you kiss him, “Only you, my handsome sharpshooter.” Hyunjae groans, “Gross!” You two giggle as you flip him off. As Hyunjae leaves defeated, you kiss Younghoon again, “Oh, how I’ve missed you.” Even if you were separate, you’d make your way back to each other one way or another.

[mesaylormoon]

Upgraded: A Review

It has been almost 20 years since the debut of The Devil Wears Prada, and for that reason, the timing of Upgraded’s release is interesting. This movie definitely exists in the same vein as its counterpart, and I think it’s clever that this film capitalized on the similarities it shares with TDWP to reinvigorate interest in the genre. Camila Mendes is at times, a fun actress, and was the main selling point that ultimately convinced me to watch this movie, but…

Pros:

* Camila Mendes’ performance provides the main character with a well-developed personality. Instead of the usual wide-eyed innocent or fish-out-of-water archetype, the protagonist has a biting sense of humor, she’s down-on-her-luck, irresponsible, sassy, and even a bit vengeful

* It’s refreshing to finally see art history majors, and Irish folk, represented in film

* Ana and William (the film’s love interests) share decent chemistry

* The costume design is more grounded in reality than other films like it and most of the outfits are sophisticated while still looking achievable

* Marisa Tomei in anything is always a plus

* The film’s setting is extravagant and the cinematography in this movie perfectly captures what makes England such a tourist spot

Cons:

* Ana (the main character) is presented with very few obstacles that would make it difficult to achieve success in her career. She coincidentally makes connections with people who immediately elevate her position in life and there are few instances in which the protagonist earns what she has accomplished in the working world. Ana is also set up as a career-oriented woman, but once she meets Will, (the love interest), she becomes far too easily distracted by him and her character arc gives way to an underdeveloped romance

* Ana is characterized as a liar. Despite the level of dishonesty she demonstrates to her coworkers, each of them forgive her far too easily and she suffers no consequences for her actions

* Marisa Tomei is a great actress, but as a result of bad direction, her performance is not very strong. Her character, Claire DuPont, is described as terrifying and demanding to work for, but her actions and behaviors hardly support this characterization. Claire is the movie’s central antagonist and is supposed to serve as Upgraded’s version of Miranda Priestly. Unfortunately, Tomei’s portrayal of Claire DuPont is so much more “cushy” than Miranda Priestly that she does not give the movie a sense of conflict it so badly needs. Tomei is also forced to talk with a cartoonish French accent, which… ugh

* Two rival coworkers are introduced in this movie, but if they were removed from the script, nothing would change, and neither of them pose a real threat to the main character

Verdict: Upgraded is a film that tries and fails to create an upbeat narrative about achieving one’s dreams and finding success in a cutthroat industry. This movie had so much potential to become The Devil Wears Prada for a new generation, but there are many reasons Upgraded does not work on a fundamental level. I can appreciate its attempts to pay homage to a good chick flick, but despite the film’s great setup, its execution and payoff are disappointing. I can only lie in anxious wait for the next big-budget attempt to recapture the magic of one of the most iconic movies of the 2000s.