#despite yourself
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#captain kirk#tarsus iv#conscience of the king#nog#ar 558#the siege of ar 558#dr m'benga#j'gal#under the cloak of war#starfleet#the eugenics war#number one#dr bashir#dr culber#ash tyler#voq#despite yourself#mental health#trauma#ptsd#star trek tos#star trek the original series#star trek ds9#star trek deep space nine#star trek snw#star trek strange new worlds#star trek disco#star trek discovery#star trek#tv shows
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it's still you
#epithet erased#epithet erased prison of plastic#prison of plastic#prison of plastic spoilers#epithet erased fanart#lorelai blyndeff#epithet erased lorelai#my art#notice the difference in meaning#the original quote is âdespite everything (that has happened to you) it's still youâ#here it's#âdespite everything (that you tried to do to not have to face yourself) it's still youâ#:)
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the modern villainisation of demeter will never cease to enrage me bc it wasnât ENOUGH to just take a story of a girl being torn from her home from everyone who loved her and dragged away to be forced into marriage and twist and corrupt it until it was a romance story about female empowerment that wasnât ENOUGH they HAD to take the original hero of the story the mother who went to every length to find her daughter again to bring her home and demonise her character until she was this horrific overbearing unloving mother. overprotective controlling without love. they turn the story of her grief at her YOUNG daughter being torn from her without her knowledge into the story of a misunderstood bad boy and a horrible cruel mother who wonât give him a chance and i really find it sickening. itâs ironic, that the ever misogynist age of hellenistic greece, has a better grasp of how disgusting and horrifying this situation was that a modern, self proclaimed âfeministâ era.
#ovids version made me cry#imagine youâre just a nymph watching your friend torn away from you by the literal king of the dead#and despite knowing how powerless you are against him you still choose to stand up to him#to stand up for your friend#imagine being so torn apart by the grief of losing her you weep yourself to death#imagine turning that story into a good girl/bad boy romance#weird#anyway#the story of persephone is personal to me#bc i wish my mother loved me like that#demeter was a good mother#you all suck for portraying her as anything less#idc if you disagree#âoh myth is open to interpretation and reinterpretationâ#okay. well i donât care.#thereâs such thing as bad interpretations#making demeter the villain is a bad one#making hades a misunderstood protagonist is also a bad one
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I find the fact that the confrontation at the end of UTRH is often summarized as Jason asking Bruce to kill the Joker for him fascinating.
Because that's not what happened.
Jason holds a gun up to Joker's head, gives Bruce another, and tells him that if Bruce doesn't do something (shoot Jason), he will kill Joker.
Jason doesn't give the gun to Bruce so that he would shoot Joker. He isn't expecting Bruce to pull the trigger on the clown. He's asking Bruce to do nothing. To be inactive. Because that will still be a choice, and despite having done nothing, everybody clearly agrees that Bruce would still, at least in part, be responsible for Joker's death.
...And to me, this moment is a kind of- microcosm, of the rest of Jason's point. Because after being captured and carted off to Arkham, the villain will escape again, and will kill more people. The only way to truly prevent that from happening would be to kill them; Bruce refuses to do so, and I respect his right to choose such a thing for himself, but it is still a choice, and if we agree that Bruce's inaction during the confrontation would leave him at least partly responsible for the Joker's death, then we must also agree that his inaction in permanently preventing the Rogues from killing more people means he is also, partly, responsible for all of those deaths.
#my dc posting#batman#dc#bruce wayne#jason todd#joker#uhh is this like analysis or meta#anyway. to me this is the message that scene sends#if we say bruce doing nothing would mean he assisted in the murder of joker then bruce doing nothing about the villains means he is also#responsible for those deaths#ANYWAY yes b4 you come at me;;#bruce's belief in rehabilitation and that everyone can get better is central to his character#and i love it and no i dont actually think he should kill the rogues or whatever#but the question there is. Are you fine with the future victims your decisions will cause?#Are their lives worth the slim chance any of these people will get better?#batman says yes theyre worth it. red hood says no theyre not.#thats the fundamental moral difference there#its why jason challenges the batman status quo#which is why he cant be harnessed well after his initial return bc comics can never truly escape that status quo#anyway i sure am having some thoughts for someone not that smart so if you disagree please tell me!!! just be civil or ill just block you <#...anyway this is another thing BTAS succeeds in bc i always feel like yes these villains do deserve yet another chance#despite what theyve done. bruce's belief in them doesnt feel stupid and naive#its abt what you yourself can live with. bruce can live w the deaths of the ppl the criminals he doesnt get rid of kill#and jason can live with killing those criminals and preventing further victims
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my and my friends' tavs âĄ
#art#bg3#these kind of portraits will go up mid-march as comms if you wanna grab one for yourself!!#ok credits time: tief is mine#the dragonborns belong to suroseno and adragonswinging on twitter (respectively)#and the hottie is under the custody of galacticjonah and valsundo <3#despite everything all we're still posting art lads we MUST
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#. GIVE ME WHAT I WANT
featuring đșđ¶đ°đ”đźđČđč đžđźđ¶đđČđż đ
đłđČđș!đżđČđźđ±đČđż
fluff. he allowed himself to feel something he rarely did, peace and love because with you he got everything he wants.
happy birthday to my lover boy kaiser !! and happy christmas everyone !!
More awake inside of his dreams, the loneliness suits him better as he remains the only star in this cruel world. He doesnât know what he wants but itâs not this, these sugar-coated words don't mean anything when he says them with his lips, tongue rolling with venom when he sees the faces of despair, experiencing the depth of a personâs soul when they have been put in their place. The moment people give up and are left hopeless, desperate for salvation, sacrificing their talent for more tedious lives â they are weak, more or less dead.
Impossible. He hates and loathes upon hearing that word coming out of someone's mouth, which makes him want to prove himself even more. Nothing is impossible. He was the weak person who gave up at any given chance, curling up into a ball to disappear and become invisible, embracing what is dearest to him in all the vast space, a planet that shines brighter than any star, emitting its own light basking in the gravity of football.
I don't know what I want but I know it's not this⊠A blue rose on his neck traced down with chain-like intertwined thorns that made their way to the crown on his left hand. To remind himself, to never again fall into that weak mindset, a dark and deep rabbit hole that wonât lead you to Wonderland but straight to execution, and it's âOff with your head!â. A symbol that shows the impossible, he is the symbol itself, not the tattoo.
Was that really you next to me? Itâs cold even under the blanket, it's cold because it's winter ⊠But itâs warm when you kiss him, itâs warm when you love him. Sometimes it makes him sad when he receives a gift because he doesnât know how heâs supposed to react. Itâs his birthday and he doesnât like it. Christmas lights, a decorated apartment, food on the table, and a woman full of love. Giving him what he wants, then again who is he supposed to please?
âDon't you like it, my love? I-I can always return it if you don'tâŠâ Kaiser tried to play it off, masking his emotions behind his usual arrogance. But with you, he was differentâless rude, less cold. His eyes lingered on the gift he had just unwrapped: golden rings. Promise rings, you had said with a soft smile, assuring him that nothing could ever tear you apart. Yet, your expression betrayed youâyour face was full of sadness and regret. It hurt him more than he cared to admit, more than anything else ever could.
He watched as you looked down, fidgeting with your hands, retreating into yourself. You had given him so much more than he deserved. You gave him what he needed the most: a dream to hold on to.
Then, you felt itâhis colder, larger hands settling gently atop yours. For someone usually so brash, the touch was rather gentle and tender. He turned your hand palm up, brushing his thumb over your knuckles before sliding the ring onto your ring finger. An arrogant young man with a superiority complex, Kaiser had always been a fortress of pride and self-importance. But beneath it all, he was just a boy yearning to be loved. âI never said anything like that, Engel,â he murmured, his voice softer than youâd ever heard it. "Iâm just⊠not good at this stuff, okay? Birthdays and gifts, theyâre not my thing. Never have been."
He tilted his head, studying your face. His usual smirk returned, but it was softer now, almost boyish. Kaiser knows you are doing this with pure intentions, he knows he has ben truly blessed not on this day, but the day he met you. And even if he hides it, you can see the little boy's eyes waiting to hear those three words.
âI love you,â you whispered, leaning in to kiss him. Wrapping your arms around his neck, your lips met his, the warmth of your touch seemed to catch him off guard, and he instinctively stepped back. You both paused, glancing upâmistletoe. A sweet kiss for the birthday boy. A loving kiss for the gift youâd received from the universe. His lips were softer than you expected, and he tasted faintly of your lipstick, a reminder of just how sweet your kisses were. He loves you too. You are everything he could ask for: pretty, smart, loving, and caring. You are his.
As he kissed you back, his hands found your waist, pulling you closer. The motion brought him off balance as he hit the edge of the bed, pulling you down with him. You landed on top of him, both breathless, laughter spilling into the space between your lips.
âTime to unwrap your other present~â you teased as you caressed his face, and he felt the golden ring pressing to his cheek.
On days like this, angels are said to come alive. But you were born oneâhis angel, his most precious treasure. For someone who believed the world to be cruel, who found pleasure in proving everyone else wrong, you were the exception to all his rules. You made him want to be better, not for the world, but for you. Who am I supposed to please? He asked, more to himself than to you, repeating the question that haunted him. His answer was clear now. It wasnât about the world, the people who doubted him, or even his old self. It was you. It had always been you.
©2024 kaiser1ns do not copy, repost or modify my work.
#â§* ê on hiatus#â§* ê blue lock#â§* ê michael kaiser#this is being posted when im on hiatus but i just couldn't not post something for kaiser because he deserves all the love in this world#i wish i could kiss him fr and show him that he can be loved <3 hbd to one of my comfort charcaters !!#and as someone who relates to him please love and believe in yourself#despite everything that's going on or what happened â its going to be okay / you are going to be okay#just believe in the impossible because there is nothing impossible / I love yall <333#blue lock#x reader#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#blue lock x you#michael kaiser#michael kaiser x reader#kaiser x reader#kaiser x reader fluff#blue lock fluff#michael kaiser x you#kaiser x you#kaiser michael#kaiser blue lock#bllk fluff#kaiser fluff#blue lock michael kaiser
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okay hi so listen hear me out
sea snake is a bit too obvious (and too boring)
so i made him based on some kind of lionfish??? (bc something something venomous marine animal) also with a LOT of creative liberties i made with how the fish looks like
letâs also give his fins some rips and tears here and there bc what are the implications of that??? thatâs for you đ«” to decide
anyways chat i lowkey dont know what i was doing
i had no other thoughts but haha funny snake man i turn into fish
#mmm the quality is so crunchy#also his ass is under there i swear#a friend pointed out where it was and iâm just hfjjdjdjd#[ââŠ-#-⧠my art#twst art#twst#twisted wonderland#jamil viper#merjamđ#-âŠâ]#also hey hi tag readers#let's do something fun here#(if you don't like deep water/drowning(?) imagery please dont continue past this đ)#âdont go near the ocean they sayâ#âfor there are sirens that will compel you with their beauty and their seductive voicesâ#âhowever you find yourself being lured in by the sea with an enchanting soundâ#âbefore you knew it you're underwater sinking deeper and deeperâ#âdespite the water filling your lungs you find yourself still conscious but not in control of yourselfâ#âas you gaze into a pair of enchanting charcoal eyesâ#âthis creature... it's a siren. and somehow you can hear its thoughts and commandsâ#âfinally. you. you are the keyâ'#âthe siren yearns to be free from the dreary depthsâ#âyou're human aren't you?â âthe siren wants to be human tooâ âthe siren wants to be freeâ#âthe siren tried to hide it but you can feel that it was desperateâ#âyou /will/ take it onto landâ#âyou /will/ let the siren be a part of that world... or elseâ#(idk what im on tbh but mer AU đđđđ)
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That one post about how Kaycee Inscryption would get along with Kel VotV has never left my mind and now that the 0.8 update is out, I could no longer resist drawing this dream team crossover. I imagine Dr. Kel would be a lot less lonely if he had an equally insane friend living in the base with him and helping him keep the local cockroach population down.
#inscryption#voices of the void#kaycee hobbes#dr kel#votv spoilers#votv#we love two girlies (gender neutral) with matching hairstyles#despite votv being an alien job simulator game#and inscryption being a meta card game#they have a surprising number of similarities#if you've never played votv i highly recommend either playing the free pre-alpha or watch a playthrough on youtube#if you've never played inscryption i recommend just playing it yourself#very solid gameplay#my art
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Yearly reminder to myself that Veth died and came back wrong
#something something mourning a version of yourself you never thought youâd lose#like her body came back but sheâs been irreversibly changed despite it#alternatively just looking back at your younger self and the way your body changes naturally with age#anyways#I gotta watch mighty nein again Iâm feeling the itch#critical role#illustration#mighty nein#veth brenatto#critical role fanart
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Thinking about vampires, death, life, and the space they occupy in between
#to be or not to be. that is the question#ty adam for being my model for dramatic vampire moment#musings on the thinkings about:#when to live you are required to hurt others. you must repeatedly ask yourself what the value of your life is#To sleep... perchance to dream...#ah. THERES THE RUB.#ok I actually couldnt come up with too many thoughts. I had a lot more while I was drawing this but I guess I put them in the painting LOL#reading that soliloquy and being like damn this is just like vampires#the reality of course is that the soliloquy is a debate over suicide and ultimately making the choice to live#even if just out of fear of the unknown#and vampires are about dying and then in undeath choosing to continue to live#despite the fear of eternity and loneliness and hurting others#theyre not the same. but like let me thiiink come onnnn I'm allowed to thiiink and have incomplete thoughts#I would have to write like a proper essay about this to organize my thoughts. this is the tags on a tumblr post.#anyways finished episode 79#working on patreon stickers for this month (and next month soon)#and working on book 4. taking a pause from episodes cause I've got 3 weeks of buffer now... UGH#I'm so mad that they changed it. it would have been 5 weeks before but it's fine it's whatever#anyways yeah taking a break from episodes to make my book now!#its good stuff.#and this painting is good stuff#banger after banger from me tbh#this was a little relaxing giving myself a couple hours to muse#it's necessary for my health and I always forget that til I do a painting...#I loved doing the little landscape in the background too I should do that more! I love how plants are just like whatever shape you want#like you can make up any plant you want and not only does that plant PROBABLY exist somewhere#a weirder plant exists somewhere too. so. literally whatever you want#ok bye again for a few days while I get back to work
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Trans Curly headcanons are fascinating to me cause like⊠Jimmy would resent him more for it.
Masculinity is a weird underlying thing in their dynamic where Jimmy feels inferior to Curly about not only their job positions but roles in life. The idea that Curly is the better man who also made himself such would be such a blow to Jimmyâs already fragile and unstable ego. Like itâs not just that heâs just transphobic, he hates Curlyâs ability to craft himself into what he wants to be successfully, it not about Curly being afab but Curly still being the better man.
But then he wouldnât get the self image issues one can face, feeling like an imposter in a space you wanted to be in or even scared to be there. Heâd just think Curly always gets what he desires and thinks nothing of it like he always has.
#also like it would be horrifying post crash cause like the implications and themes in the game I wonât get into rn#but this was inspired but a cute ish fic where Anya gave Curly his T shot cause like thatâs just cute#and then itâs sad cause maybe Iâm thinking Curly didnât want to think or accept Jimmy would do such a thing because it means he couldâve#done something like that to him and the underlying fears that trans men and masc can have in male spaces of being found out and punished for#it and itâs an interesting thing to think about if it were canon or not cause like what if yknow? like trusting someone with a fact like#that about yourself only to see them torment and dehumanize someone in a way you easily couldâve been and still could be but this ainât bout#that like Jimmy would have envy and resentment about Curly no matter if Curly was or wasnât trans or if he disabled before the crash or#whatever cause he just resented Curly for being what he couldnât be genuinely#mouthwashing#but back to Anya doing his T shot itâs like sad and cute cause itâs like useless now but itâs also so important to him and sheâs such a good#friend and nurse to still do it and he has to think about despite all he didnât do for her she still is doing this little thing for him and#Iâll see myself out on my sadness
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but my heart is like a claw machine
#undescribed#bonk.png#great god grove#ggg#great god grove spoilers#ggg spoilers#isttvg spoilers#she/her for hector on this post please n thank you#i had a bunch of tags attempting to explain this whole thing n post game transfem hector hc but the og post didnt show up in the tags#n its like 5:30 something n i was already having trouble explaining it bc ive had like four hours of sleep so i sadly cant talk about gender#stuff like i wanted to in full detail so something something sanding self down to be nonthreatening n palatable#something something the way players (myself included) falsely believed king was a man despite many of us being trans or otherwise queer#n pre endgame king only being referred to with they/them something something men as the default as problem solvers as leaders the heroes of#the story something something hector's envy of the way king is loved n admired n able to be heard as herself#hector's fear of death n irrelevance driving her to do the shit she did n the main theme of isttvg (aside from transgenderism) being fear of#death n how denying yourself will cause you to become irrelevant in ur own life disconnected from everything as the years fly by#theres still time.#enjoy the bullet points its almost six am im gonna pass out#wiat also fixation on youth in both how we view n associate feminity n what is normally explored n portrayed with transgendering
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Something about how Rayla is his lightâŠ. And also the only reason he would turn to darknessâŠ.
Something about how Kosmo said if he ever did dark magic again his light would go out and darkness would consume himâŠ. But the very act of him doing dark magic would be him preserving his light in a very literal wayâŠ
#tdp#tdp spoilers#tdp s6#tdp season 6#tdp callum#tdp rayla#tdp rayllum#the dragon prince#the dragon prince spoilers#tdp s6 spoilers#something about how I think Kosmo is wrong despite being time blind#something about how choices and destiny is a book you write yourself#something about how Iâm going insane over them#something about how everything since season 1 has been exploring how the most obvious answer isnât always the truth#something
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A kindling of a swordless bloodshed,
The creaking of a voiceless door â
Another piece inspired by something @mincemeat-the-warforged said that absolutely altered my brain chemistry (the same 1 am conversation that sparked this in fact!)
#curse of strahd#rahadin#strahd von zarovich#sergei von zarovich#my art#curse of strahd spoilers#curse of Ă„sane#every day i wake up and think about strahd and rahadins dynamic#they make me sick#Rahadin being loyal to the von zarovich family rather than *only* to strahd is a critical detail to me#like aze said#wtf do u do when someone kills the only remaining member of ur âadoptiveâ family#ur stuck w him now. obviously. thereâs nobody else to turn to and u still love him despite the atrocities#esp since youâve done just as much against the people used to belong to. you cut yourself off and now heâs done the same#(through tears) do yall think Rahadin mourned Sergei or do u think he repressed and smothered all those feelings#ik we all laugh at the rahadin amber temple frog incident but despite its weirdness it still shows how much Rahadin *cares*#sorry sorry i have too many thoughts abt this old man#ugh. strangles him#anyway
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i finished rereading the first four vorkosigan books (+ "the flowers of vashnoi" because ekaterin!!!), and you really have to feel for piotr vorkosigan because what a nightmare life, truly.
imagine you are born just in time for your world to be unified by dorca vorbarra and rediscovered by people from wider galaxy. things are finally looking good, for the first time in 600 years of isolation there is no more feudal infighting, and the promise of galactic medicine and technologies being available lightens everyone's perspectives. sure, your grandpa is called count pierre "le sanguinaire", but who doesn't have terrible relatives?
then you are 15, and suddenly your planet is attacked by the aggressive eugenecist space empire hell-bent on subjugating your people and turning them into disposable material for unethical genetic experiments. you flee into the mountains, away from your family, and create guerrilla forces from locals sworn to your dad, and it's really terrible for a very long time. you have no high-tech weapons and no food, you sleep in a cave in the dead of winter, and the cetagandans try everything (from carpet bombing to chemical weapons) to murder you.
but hey, at least you now have your bff ezar vorbarra, and (from the bff's words on his deathbed) it sounds like you two had so much fun between unimaginable horrors and despair, and it's not surprising, since no one really believes in death after life at 20. then the emperor makes you a general at the tender age of 22. fortunately for him, you & bff make a frighteningly competent dream-team, and the joke's on cetagandans.
then, several years later, you ask the emperor for weapons, because you still sleep on the bare cave floor, there are little resources, and every ghem on the planet is trying to murder you. he offers you the hand of his granddaughter instead, like it's some sort of twisted fairytale, but you grow to love your olivia more than anything, and the tide of war is finally turning, and you allow yourself to entertain the idea of peaceful life, and then...
the space eugenecist empire nukes your hometown, killing your mom, dad, surviving brothers, and two hundred thousand of your people. plus your bff (ezar) gets a radiation doze large enough for it to cause severe cancer thirty years later. great.
but you win! your district is in shambles, your capital is an irradiated crater, your castle is in ruins, but you win! the old dorca dies, and yuri ascends the throne, but politicking is secondary to the fact that you are alive.
yes, you are probably not entirely sane, and you've long forgotten what the peaceful times look like, but you are alive, just under 35, and your entire life is ahead of you. olivia is alive too, and ezar, and you now have three wonderful children, and the extended vorpatril-vorbarra family that hosts regular get-togethers. sure, your mom-in-law is a betan with all sorts of crazy ideas in her head, but she is not pierre vorrutyer. small mercies.
but then the new emperor goes mad, and decides to murder your entire family overnight. your brothers-in-law are gone, one of your sisters-in-law too, and all your nephews and nieces except little padma. but all of this pales in comparison to the facts that olivia is murdered, and that your heir and daughter lay dead beside her.
all you have left of her, of your house, of the family you've lost in vashnoi not a ten years ago, is aral, whom you keep by your side throughout the bloody civil war to put your bff on the throne.
but you win again. you are 43, and ezar vorbarra is now the emperor. you are responsible for the imperium's entire ground forces. you are also responsible for a severely traumatized boy of 13, and the only children you've interacted with without olivia's genle guidance were little messengers of guerilla companies.
what a mess.
#vorkosigan saga#lois mcmaster bujold#piotr vorkosigan#i was also reading /the lives of wonderful people/ books about mikhail vorontsov and alexander benkendorf last month and these two in#their younger years have the exact vibes of piotr and ezar during the first cetagandan war#chase after some poor cossacks on mail duty because you have mistaken them for enimies & you're twenty and long for military glory? yes#fearlessly hang about very dangerous mountains despite the threat of ambush? check#ask your boss to let you travel to YAKUTSK of all places because his inspection of southern siberia is boring and you#want to prove to yourself how cool you are? yes#agree to be someone's second on the duel and then inventively sell it to the emperor? also yes#volunteer for the dangerous expedition to the aegean sea? conquer the unconquerable ottoman fortress? yes and yes#and like..... despite it all they were also competent!#benkendorf ended french occupation of the netherlands in 10 days#and vorontsov was a commander at one of the most dangerous positions during the battle of borodino#during the battle of craonne vorontsov led the infantry and benkendorf the cavalry and together they held their own against napoleon!#but yes general-fieldmarchal count vorontsov the imperial governor of everything between modern moldova and the caspian sea#and cavalry general benkendorf who was the feared head of the gendarmes and before that aide-de-camp of emperor alexander#were also once crazy (and crazely talented) twenty year olds#which is basically what guerilla piotr and ezar are
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I love the show The Librarians but I never can forgive the writers for making an entire episode about Ezekiel Jones going through trauma after trauma, learning so many things and growing so much as a person as he fights through a time loop looking for some way to save everyone, having him succeed in saving everyone but himself, and for his fellow Librarians who only know the last loop to bring him back BUT HE HAS NO MEMORIES FROM HIS TIME IN THE TIME LOOP!
Just a character reset and I was so pissed. They didn't even allude to him actually remembering but pretending not to!
#the librarians#the librarians show#Ezekiel was my favorite character and i loved the moments where they let him be genuine#my guy got an apple that turns you into the worst version of yourself and every other mc nearly destroyed the world when they had it#spent the whole episode saying dont let ezekiel touch it#he finally gets it and nothing happens#only person to willing give it up#and without any world domination plans#also saved a dying kid everyone wrote off#helped a girl who accidentally started a cult after being tricked into using an obsession potion#loves his mom and sisters despite them making fun of him for no longer stealing stuff#he saved Christmas with his mom after she almost ruined it and almost got them melted by santas brother#its been years since ive watched the show#but i still have thoughts if you coukdnt tell by the post and my tag rant lol#dont mind the rambles#Ezekiel Jones
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