#damn I really cried a lot while writing this
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why would Aaravos want a mortal vessel?
alright, so
I've watched the new season. I've already screamed and cried and rolled under the table and I have one final question left.
Why would Aaravos want a mortal vessel? Especially now, when the Archdragons are gone. He is supposed to be infinitely stronger than any other being on Xadia. Supposed to, yeah. Did you see the so called 'master of all six primal sources' show off his mastery more than once? Because I didn't. And it pisses me off beyond measure because it really seems like bad writing to me. He just fucking didn't do anything, just stood there, waiting for his enemies to charge at him. He was easily overcome by fucking human chains and ballistas- and one archdragon- when we were said that in the past he could easily hold off against all of them! Damn. Imo, Aaravos was seriously downplayed this season.
I know, perhaps this was his plan- to get himself killed and take all of the archdragons with him. Even so, he should've put up more of a fight. NOT JUST STAND THERE WAITING TO BE SMACKED!
And still why? Why want Callum as a mortal vessel? It doesn't make any sense. Maybe the Star Council or what's they're called- maybe they have a restriction prohibiting them to hurt mortals? Which sounds rather stupid but it's the only explanation I can think of.
The creators tried to do the build-up for arc 3 and in doing so they rushed and blurred the arc 2 finale. Putting together the archdragon drama, killing Aaravos drama and Rayllum drama was a mistake. Neither got fully developed. And were they seriously trying to tell us that the main cast would have survived the nuclear burst explosion of a star while being protected only by Domina's wings??? What are the wicked things even made of?? Oceanic mithril???
The final showdown felt like a series of Chekhov's guns which never fired. They just made a lot of drama around them, then showed them to us and- that's it. I suppose, Aaravos's plan was to get stabbed by the Nova blade, then take over Callum's body (for whatever reason) as his giant form was being destroyed. But then- we return to the question of why move to another body when there's nothing stopping Ezran from stabbing Aaravos in Callum's body (aside from their brotherly bond but that's no big deal, he just needs to ask Soren or whatever-).
As a result, we got Ezran with a Nova blade which never got to be used- Callum with his coin spell which was interrupted halfway because Aaravos got charged at by a dragon and Callum's gunsight was broken??? ??? That's- I'll be honest, this is so dumb. No Nova, no dark magic. Why even bring that at all?
And finally, what did Aaravos even die from? He did not sustain any lethal damage. When Zubeia and Avizandum were lifting him up (and yes, why didn't he stop them? did he forget all of his spells and telekinesis as well??), what were they thinking?.. What were they gonna do? It looked like they were about to drop him but- this is also so dumb. I don't think that would have worked because if Aaravos is so easy to kill- Why the fuck didn't they kill him 300 years ago??? "Didn't want to?". God damn.
I won't believe that Aaravos didn't have the power to take down the archdragons and that's why he simply decided it would be easier to go boom and set off the rebirth cycle. I refuse to believe that he is so weak. After all, one, he already killed two archdragons and that went fine. And two, even humans managed to kill one! They even survived!
Overall, I am absolutely in love with the first half of the season. I loved all the conflict everywhere, the part in Silvergrove was wonderful, felt like a real holiday- The adventures of Claudia and Co were also very exciting to watch!
But after that... It got rushed, blurred and very, very odd.
At least we got a white streak Callum. And a whole lot of 1 (one) interaction between Aaravos and Callum. That's an achievement, yeah. I love when the main protagonist and the main antagonist only have two interactions throughout all of the seasons (no, I don't, I fucking hate it).
That would be all. This is entirely my humble and angry opinion so- you are welcome to disagree. But I will stand my ground. This went very oddly and some parts I unfortunately didn't like. But I am all in for arc 3. Even angry and a little disappointed, I still fucking love this show and would be more than excited to see how it all goes from here. We still have so much to learn and see. The cube, Claudia, Rayllum, Elarion, grown up and talking Zym (it was such a twist!), Harrow in a bird... Please let us see this! Please, Netflix! Aaravos is not defeated, he merely retreated, please let us see how they'll deal with him in seven years!
#the dragon prince#tdp s7 spoilers#tdp spoilers#tdp critical#tdp aaravos#tdp archdragons#tdp opinion#thoughts#give us the saga#greenlightarc3#continue the saga#and I was genuinely surprised by the relationship between Claudia and Aaravos#an unexpected found family#I thought Aaravos would be more cold-hearted and manipulative#but it seems he warmed up for the poor girl#it doesn't seem healthy for both sides but- it was cute and understandable#upd: though now that I think about it-#it probably still was a manipulation#in claudia he prepared himself a hidden ally for his return#if claudia truly believes he thinks of her as a daughter#that would only make her work harder#and more loyally
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Darling and absolutely evil Phanie said they wanted the ending where sick Ron dies? Well here it is.
@aki-draws-things
Tw major ïżŒcharacter death! (Turned into all three of them dyingâŠ)
Iâm no medical expert idk if the sickness I give Ron is even possible. Sooo take a little bit of non reality juice and have fun reading.
(You should know I cried while writing this.)
Lung infection that moved to the blood.
The doctors say he might not wake back up.
Tom left when they were told.
Chris just held onto Ron tighter.
That was hours ago.
Chris has cried so much he has no more tears. He feels a light tug to his hand. He shoots up to see Ronâs eyes open. âHey pretty boy.â
Oh Chris was so wrong. Heâs got lots of tears left. Theyâre starting right now. âHey baby.â
âYouâve gotta take care of Tom. I since canât. I know this sucks. Itâs horrible. But itâll be okay. You two have each other and Jake. Just remember to be patient. God Chris Iâm so sorry.â
Chris lunges forward. He canât stop himself, he grabs Ron into a hug. Canât even kiss Ron due to the fear of it catching. âStop it. Youâre gonna be fine.â
Ron shakily brings a hand up to Chrisâs back. âYouâre not stupid baby. We both know this doesnât get better. Now.â Ron shifts up a little with a serious look in his eyes. âI love you. But I need you to not die along with me. I love you more then anything but youâve gotta live. Gotta get married to Tom if itâs allowed later. Gotta be the incredible dad to Jake you already are.â
Chris is sobbing. Heâs got his hands curled in Ronâs hospital gown. âPlease-â
Ron kisses his head. âNo. I know you. You know Iâm right. Iâm dying. Itâs okay. Iâll watch the three of you forever. Be happy with Tom.â
Chris nods. âPromise me.â
Chris shakes. âI canât.â Ron squeezes his arm. âPromise.â Chris letâs out another sob. âOkay. I promise.â
Ron relaxes slightly, leans back into the pillows. âGood. I love you so much.â Chris decides he doesnât care. He kisses Ron. Canât live without doing it one final time. âIâll love you forever.â Ron smiles at him. âCan you get Tommy? Wanna talk to him.â
Chris doesnât have the heart to tell Ron he ran. âCourse. Iâll be right back.â
When he goes to find a pay phone he almost trips over Tom. Tom whoâs sitting on the floor with his head in his hands. âHe wants to see me?â Chris goes on his knees. âYeah. Iâm gonna get Jake so he can say bye.â Tom shudders.
-
âHey baby.â
Tom sits on the bed. He hesitates before curling next to Ron. âWe need to talk.â
Tom shakes. âAlright.â
Ron looks down at him, he presses a kiss to Tomâs head before starting. âIâve known you for years. I hate that Iâm leaving you like this. Shouldnât be this way but itâs happening. You canât follow me to an early grave. It would kill Chris and Jake. Gotta stay with them. I know itâll hurt. But you have to stay.â
Tom is gripping Ronâs arm so hard heâs afraid heâs going to break skin. âStop. Stop it right now.â
âYouâre brilliant. Iâve loved you since I was 13. Thatâs never going to change. Youâll always have me. Because Iâll be gone but Iâll watch all of you. I love you so much Tommy.â
Tom sobs. He spins around to look at Ron. He kisses Ron. Canât help himself. âI donât know how to live without you.â Ron brushes the hair out of his face. âIt wonât be easy. But youâll do it. Manage until you join me. But youâve gotta love Chris as much as you love me.â
Tom so very gently smacks Ron. âI already do, Iâd do anything for him and Jake. I just donât know how to live without you.â
Ron shrugs. âWe never thought we would need to. But you can do it. Marry Chris. Be the incredible dad to Jake. Be an incredible leader. Iâll be there watching. Iâm so proud of you. I love you more then youâll ever know.â
Thereâs a sob before an answer. âFuck Ron I love you too. Iâll love you until I see you again.â
Thereâs a knock on the door. Chris leans his head in. âCan Jake and I come in?â
Ron smiles. âCourse. Iâll always see my chickie.â
The small blond child races over to the bed. Jake climbs up. âPapa? Youâre dying arenât you.â
Ron nods. He watches as Chris and Tom hold each other behind Jake. âBut itâll be okay baby. Your dads love you more then youâll ever be able to know. Youâve gotta know I love you more then anything. Youâre the best thing thatâs ever happened to me. You made me a dad.â Ron cries for the first time that day. God he wishes he wasnât leaving them. But he canât stop the slow drag he feels.
âYou be the best at whatever you want to do Jake. Iâll be watching. Iâll be there every step of the way. Youâll never be alone.â
Jake is crying. He doesnât want his papa to go.
âBut why canât you stay.â Ron wipes Jakeâs tears away. âBecause Iâve done all I can here. Iâve gotta watch you from somewhere else now. Gonna love you forever and be there for everything.â
Chris is turned away. His hands are covering his mouth. He canât watch this. Canât watch Ron tell their kid heâs never coming home. He sobs.
Tom isnât much better. Heâs still watching. Knows how bad this is going to be.
âPapa can I sleep with you.â
Ron knows if he says yes heâs not waking back up. He used all that was left for these conversations. âCourse Chickie. But youâve gotta promise you know I love you.â Jake sniffs. âCourse I know you love me. I love you!â Ron smiles at him. He pulls Jake closer and looks at Chris and Tom.
âI love you both. Thank you for the best life I couldâve ever dreamed up.â They both come over to the bed. They curl up on either side. âLove you Ron.â âLove you baby.â
â
He died three hours later.
Jake has to be pulled away.
Chris canât cry.
Tom is uncontrollably sobbing.
â
When they all go home Jake sleeps in their bed for the rest of the summer. Tom promises to never fly again. He canât. Wonât let himself. Chris refuses to go into fires. He quits his job, David follows right along with him.
-
When Jake joins the navy theyâre so proud. But they know he did it for his papa not for himself. He loves planes. Desperately needs to be close to what his father did.
-
When gay marriage is legal they get married. They canât stop crying. The court thinks itâs because theyâre so happy. Itâs really because there should be another man standing there.
-
Tom and Chris go to Ronâs grave every month.
Heâs not actually buried there. Was cremated, they all wear necklaces with his ashes.
Itâs been a long horrible few years. Chris got diagnosed with lung cancer. Fighting fires really fucks your lungs up. Tom is forgetting more and more.
Jake lost his leg in a plane crash. He retired early. Takes care of the two kids he has with Bradley.
They sit on the ground with their backs pressed against the grave. Theyâre holding hands.
âI miss him.â
Thereâs a small laugh.
âI do too. Wish he was here every day.â
âThank you for an incredible life Tom. This was a fabulous life. I love you.â
âThank you for always believing in me. For being there when I was horrible. I love you too.â
Suddenly they see a tall guy standing there before them.
âHey you two.â
Chris sobs. He reaches up and is picked up. âGod I missed you.â
Tom stands on his own. He wraps his arms around Ronâs waist.
âWe sure about leaving Jake?â âHeâll be okay. He knows itâs time for us to go.â
They walk off together to watch over their kid. Hell their grandkids.
But at least now theyâre all together again.
#ron slider kerner#chris seresin#ron slider kerner x chris seresin#tom iceman kazansky#tom x ron x chris#ron x chris x tom#tom kazansky x ron kerner#chris seresin x tom iceman kazansky#jake hangman seresin#young jake seresin#major character death#damn I really cried a lot while writing this#mac writes top gun
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I frequently feel completely isolated no matter how much I talk to people. So that's fun
#sorry if anyone sees these im tired of using my personal discord servet to vent. i always spiral too much#anyways i have an idea for a good poem to write for class because of recent events#ughhhh idk i just wish i wasnt so annoying about asking if i can open ip to people#or if someone would just ask if i was okay. i mean actually id probably lie i am not actually good at being open.#but like hey idk it feels nice to feel like people genuinely want to know#ughhhhfhfhf i do this to myself sometimes JSHSJSKDJDJD#welp its just how life goes. i feel lonely all the time and i soldier on#surely helping the next person will make me feel better! nope. surely helping yhis next person will make me feel better! nope. surely-#tgats me. thats what i sound like#yeah idk it feels like everyone is going through something worse than me so itd be a moral failing on my part#to ask them if i could just like. feel bad. noticeably#not even talk about it just look down and out of it for a day#yknow i emailed one of my teachers asking permission to go by a new preferred name#this is at like. a massive very queer and trans art school.#and i asked him permission to do this#and i was joking with my friends about how pathetic i sounded in it#and one of them patted me on the head and said âthere there buddyâ like very jokingly#but i almost cried because thats the first time in so long someone has like. really tried to comfort me#or shown me much physical affection#my mom gives me hugs and stuff but thats always about her. i dont blame her shes got a lot of stuff going on#but idk its really selfish of me but i just wanna have people see me and feel bad for me and it be about my pain for a little while#ill get over it im just being a teenager but shit god fucking damnit#i just want a break from feeling like my world is falling apart#then getting some footing#then it falling apart again#okay i feel a bit better now better stop the complain train JDJDJSKSJD#hey why do i never hear that it rhymes and everything thays so good#damn i gotta use that more#welp weve reached our stop sorry if anyone ever read thjs. hope you have a nice day tho lol
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This is new to me, this is new to you
- Ryomen Sukuna x Reader âą Word Count: 0.6k -
content warnings: singlemom!reader, early relationship things, talk of meeting children, playful banter etc
âSix months.â
âSix months? Thatâs a long time, doll.â
Sukunaâs lips quirk at your scowl, hand swirling his coffee absentmindedly across the booth.
âWell thatâs the rules,â you state firmly, fingers peeling at the label on your own drink nervously as you await a response.
âThe rules?â
Sukuna can tell his vague responses are beginning to annoy you; the way your eyes roll at his aloofness, your hands twitching nervously as you await his answer.
âOkay,â he finally relents, âsix months it is.â
He would normally be offended by the surprise that crosses your features, should be really. But he canât help but hold his normal snark back as you smile nervously at him.
âOkay?â You ask, âIt doesnât bother you?â
âThe fact that you have kids? Or that you want me to wait six months before I meet them?â
You frown at the question, eyes darting about to avoid his own leveled stare. He knocks his feet against yours, a subtle victory when you smile shyly at the act.
âBoth I guess?â You answer softly, âI know itâs a lot, so I understand ifâ
âCan I ask why?â Sukuna cuts you off, hands moving to grab yours once the label of your drink has been torn to shreds (youâve always had a habit of picking at your nails, and while normally endearing, heâd hate to see you anxious because of him).
âI just want to be sure,â you squeeze at his hand, fingers tracing a familiar path across calloused skin, âabout you. Us.â
Thereâs a warmth that settles deep in Sukunaâs gut at your words, but heâd be damned before he admit to the butterflies that flit in his stomach from something so juvenile.
âWhat do I always say?â
You roll your eyes, but the worry has eased from your bones. Dripping down the sides of your iced coffee as you smile brightly at him.
âAnything for you, doll,â you mock, voiced deepened to replicate him.
Sukuna moves his free hand to pinch at your nose (anything to avoid letting you go), laughing as you shriek and attempt to avoid his teasing. Your laughs settle, a fond smile widening across your features.
âAnything?â You ask once more.
âAnything.â
a/n: originally written for my beloved @euthymiya (i hope it is oki if i tag u again ily bad) finking about making this a mini series but also⊠writing⊠sobs cries screams etc etc tysm for reading <3 and reblogging <3 because you reblogged it right⊠hahaha⊠rightâŠ. đ«”đ
#writing.jjk#cottoncalicoes#sukuna x reader#sukuna ryomen x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader
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speed
ă pairing: c.s x f!reader, j.wy
ă genre: smut
ă wc: 1k
ă content: drug dealers! woosan, reader is sanâs gf and woo may or may not have a crush on her, voyeurism, voyeur! woo, no mentions of drug use or violence, backseat fucking, reverse cowgirl, pussy slapping.
ă a/n: had to take a break after seeing that woosan outlaw trailer and write thisâŠI literally canât stop thinking about it.
đ§ speed- kali uchis
Tensions were high, and it didnât help that Wooyoungâs delivery guy was 20 minutes late and counting. The exchange didnât go as well as he had hoped, and he figured some fried chicken from this new place that opened downtown would offer him some solace. He noted that this was the first and last time he would order from there.
His partner San had his own way of dealing with stress. A very loud and obnoxious way. Being forced to listen to you and San go at it like wild animals while rattling the van from side to side really didnât help make his hunger pains go away any faster.
âGod damn it, can you guys keep it down back there?â He spat, losing his count of the wad of cash in his hands.Â
Neither of you heard him, not over your loud moans. You were sprawled over Sanâs lap with your back facing him, his fingers grasping on to your waist tightly as he fucked up into your pussy at a harsh pace. You had started off slow and steady, mindful not to make too much noise so as to not bother your boyfriendâs work associate, but San was always impatient, especially on nights like this, and he found your pace a little too slow for his liking. So he decided to take matters into his own hands- literally. He was holding onto you so tight that you were sure it would leave a mark. And as for you, well you tried your best to be quiet, but it was hard when San used you like his own personal cocksleeve. He rolled his hips up to your cunt, his hard tip reaching deep inside your sweet spot, and you two filled the van with the sounds of your guttered moans and slapping skins.Â
Growing agitated, Wooyoung slammed his hand on the front dash of the van to grab both your attention. âHey! Wrap it up already, I got shit to do!â He waved the wads of cash in his hand so that San could see.Â
âShut up or itâs my cock down your throat next!â San huffed, his thrusts getting harder and faster. San always respected Wooyoung, but his obedience would disappear the moment heâd stuff his cock inside of you. There was no way of getting him to listen now, and Wooyoung knew that. Annoyed with his distasteful words, and too exhausted to quarrel any longer, Wooyoung slumped back into his seat and started his count all over again.Â
As he swiped each bill through his fingers, his eyes would occasionally glance up at the rear view mirror where heâd get a quick peek at you two. He always thought you had a pretty face, but your body was something else. He was mesmerized by the sight of your soft breasts bouncing up and down as San worked you open from behind. His gaze lingered down on to your wet cunt. He couldnât understand how something so small and delicate could take something so big and ugly like Sanâs cock. Maybe it was weird to think this way, but although Wooyoung was smaller, he thought his cock looked a lot prettier than Sanâs. Shaking his head, he looked back down at the cash and continued his count.Â
âFuck, Sannie, f-feels so good! Gonna cum!â You cried. Your moans grew loud and raspy, and Wooyoung had no choice but to look back up at the rear view mirror. Your sounds alone made his pants tighter but seeing you rub and tug your clit while San continued fucking you made a wet spot form in his boxers. Spreading his legs, Wooyoung couldnât help but palm over his erection while watching you in the mirror. He thought you were so tight and that you took him so well, and all he wanted to do now was cum at the same time as you.Â
âPretty baby gonna cum for me? Yeah? Gonna cum all over my cock?â San grunted into your ear. His hands slid up to your breasts, kneading them as continued thrusting. You were so wet now that Wooyoung could hear your squelches from up front, and god did it almost destroy him. He stuffed his hand into his pants, rubbed his thumb over his slit, and licked his lips as he watched you turn into more of a hot mess over Sanâs stiff cock. He noticed your eyes getting droopy and your breathing getting shakier.Â
âGo on baby, cum for me,â Wooyoung whispered to himself. âBe a good girl and cum.âÂ
Right on demand, your thighs squeezed together as a rush of warmth filled up your stomach. Your whole body crunched over as you came until finally your body gave up and you fell back into Sanâs chest. Your legs opened up again, giving Wooyung a great view of the milky white cum leaking out of your pussy.Â
âYes, yes, yesâ Wooyoung mumbled as he stroke himself. âGood girl,â he breathed as his hips jolted up. Your leaky cunt was the last push he needed to cum, forcing him to press his eyes shut and use his free hand to cover his mouth to mask his moans. Once he finished, he carefully peeled his eyes back open and hesitantly looked up at the same mirror, relief rushing over him when he realized neither of you noticed.Â
âGood fucking girlâ San praised, striking your sensitive cunt with his hand. You yelped at the impact before giving him a giggly kiss.Â
Up front, Wooyoung cringed seeing you two kiss. He felt good during his orgasm, but now he was annoyed again. Annoyed with the failed exchange, annoyed with the late delivery person, and annoyed with the fact that he has to sit around in his soiled underwear while listening to you two smooch each otherâs faces off. He thought it was more insufferable than hearing you two have sex.Â
âOfferâs still on the table, you know,â San winked teasingly. Wooyoung saw San looking back at him in the rear view mirror, a smug look plastered over his face as you kissed along his neck. Wooyoungâs face wrung up in a scowl once he remembered the gross comment San made to him earlier.Â
âFuck off.âÂ
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Chaos in Their Bones Ch. 6
Ongoing Series
Synopsis: All your life youâd listened to your friend, Usopp spin wild tales about pirates and adventure. Pirates werenât a thing that came often to Syrup Village, but one straw hat pirate and his crew changed all that the day they arrived. Now, you arenât so sure if your sleepy little village was always pirate-free or if no one had been paying attention. Â
Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader
Genre: friends to lovers, frenemies to lovers, slow burn (I hope yâall like aching) eventual smut
Words: 16.7+
A/N: I swear I donât start writing chapters with the intention of making them like this. The next chapter is probably going to be smaller because I get so much anxiety giving you guys these big beefy chapters. This chapter is HEFTY and full of angst. There are more one-on-one interactions with the crew members to start bringing everything together. I'm not going to lie, I struggled a lot writing this week because I started to think my writing was trash. I know itâs not necessarily true but ya. I prevailed enough to bring you this. As always, thank you, guys, for all the love and support. For always being so kind and loving my story as much as you do. I hope you all continue to enjoy this storyđ€ Much Love, Jenn
P.s. This chapter is sponsored by not really Halseyâs - YaâaburneeÂ
Chapter 1Â Chapter 2Â Chapter 3Â Chapter 4Â Previous Next
The background noise that rose and fell in octaves around you told you that they were all still talking; still arguing. Usopp disappeared to find Luffy who you could only guess was inside that damn kitchen. Nami continued to try and talk sense into Zoro who ignored every word she said by lazily running his swords over the wet stone heâd placed on the galleyâs island.Â
âAre you even listening to me?âÂ
Nami was struggling to keep her voice calm but she was losing. Sheâd looked over at you more than a few times since youâd all evacuated to the ship to help her, but what could you magically say to make Zoro change his mind? He didnât seem like a man who responded to pleading or demands.Â
He strongly held on to his beliefs. They were a system that guided him; molded him into the pain in the ass he was now. While you watched him continue to tune Nami out it was easy to see the dedication heâd given over the years to become who he was even at a young age.Â
Behind all that arrogance was a determination that sliced just as sharp as his blade. Zoro knew who he was and what he needed to do to succeed, and that was more than you could say for yourself at times.Â
SoâŠwho were you to get in the way of his dream?
The answer to that was as startling as a slap to the face. You were the woman whoâd fallen hopelessly in love with him, and he hadnât even realized it yet.
While you wanted to remain steadfast and devoted to the belief that Zoro had a chance and that the probability of him defeating Mihawk was high, the realistic part of you sounded like Naan.Â
âGet those foolish thoughts out of your head, girl.â
For once, you wanted to swat away all of her cynicism. All of her realism forced you to fight to still believe in magic and the good in the world around you outside of science and facts. You wanted to believe that Zoro knew what he was doing and that he was strong enough to beat a grown man almost half his age.Â
The other part of you, however, howled on the inside for you to stand up and go to him. To take his face in your hands and demand that he look at you and not turn away. Zoro didnât respond to pleading, but it didnât keep your own cries from weighing heavy on your tongue.Â
Donât do this. Stay with me. Make a new dream - with me.Â
All your life Usopp and you imagined what it would be like to get off the island. To put Syrup Village behind you, all the pain and unknowns that never received answers. You could both leave on your own adventures and replace all the painful memories with ones aboard ships and the open seas of possibilities.Â
You never imagined youâd meet people like Luffy or Nami. Like him.Â
Looking at Zoro now as he dragged his sword over the stone one last time you felt your heart sink. Zoro had placed all three swords neatly on the table and took his time giving them adequate deadly attention. He didnât seem bothered that you and Nami were in the room and sheltered out anything she tried to tell him.Â
Nami was begging in her own way. What could you possibly say that would change his mind? She was looking at you now, as your arms wrapped so tightly around yourself - constricting the breath from your lungs making it impossible to formulate words. You were holding on so tight because you knew if you let go, you might run to him.Â
âDoc-â the sound of her calling you jolted you out of your thoughts and back into the present. Back to where you didnât want to be. Nami was flying her eyes like a whip from you and back to Zoro as if you needed help knowing where to direct your pleas. âIs there anything you want to add here?â
FuckÂ
Zoro looked up. He actually looked up from what he was doing to look at you. Shit. Did he want you to say something? Or did he just want to know if you were going to be another obstacle in his way?
âI-â I donât know what to say.Â
What did she expect you to say? Everything you wanted to say wasnât meant to blurt out in front of her or anyone else. You were still trying to process that you were admitting to yourself that all the feelings you felt werenât just indigestion. That it wasnât just the liquor from the fishbowl that made you wish youâd laced your fingers in that moss-green hair and kissed him.Â
Luckily for you, Usopp came running back into the galley which told you all that Luffy was right behind him.Â
âOh great youâre here. Maybe you can convince him to call it off.âÂ
Zoro had gone back to examining one of his swords and making sure it was ready for the morning. He looked so deep into the edge of the katana you wanted to ask him if it was like a magic mirror and what did he see? Did he see a victory inside that blade as he polished it? Or did he see something much darker?Â
âI wonât do that.â
âDid you not see the size of that guyâs sword? He will slice you into sashimi.â
âWhatâs going on?â
âI have been trying to figure that out for the last thirty minutes,â you huffed.Â
Your words only earned you an exasperated look from Nami.Â
âYou were there when it happened!â She shot back, her voice incredulous.Â
âAnd I am still struggling to comprehend how we went from zero to a thousand in less than a minute.â
You hated this entire thing. The tension radiated like a volt of electricity between all of you. One minute, you felt fine, or as fine as you could be in this situation. The next, the anxiety from Usopp or Nami would set you off or you would completely close down like the indifference Zoro was currently showing all of you.Â
âIâm even more lost now,â Luffy muttered.
âIâll tell you whatâs going on. Your big, bad Marine grandpa sent a warlord of the Sea to bring you in, and instead of getting the hell out of here when he had the chance, Zoro challenged him to a duel.âÂ
âWhich he accepted.â
âYeah, that pretty much sums it up,â Usopp muttered to Luffy.Â
Usopp looked as nervous as you felt. Your body finally removed itself from the booth in the galley to stand beside him, linking yourselves arm and arm.Â
While Nami spoke, Zoro sheathed his sword and placed it back on the island. His arms extended out as he leaned his hands against it, his eyes boring a hole into Nami as she spoke.Â
âYou are a fly to him. Something to be swatted and forgotten.â
âNot if I win.â
âYouâre not going to.â
âYou donât know that.â
Your hand fell down to grab at Usoppâs and squeezed it lightly. Big brown eyes turned to look at you and, whatever he saw reflected in yours, was enough to make him squeeze yours back.Â
You knew Nami was trying to make a point. This dude was dangerous. He was a pirate warlord, for Christ's sake, but the idea of Zoro no longer existedâŠ
No. No. You wouldnât think it. Couldnât.Â
âGuys, guys, maybe we need more drinks,â Usopp offered.Â
A part of you wanted to laugh. You could feel it bubbling up inside your chest but the wildness of it let you know it would come out panicked; a sound that displayed the current breakdown of your soul.Â
No one else seemed to appreciate his attempt at lightening the mood.
âTell your first mate heâll get himself killed.â
âTell your navigator to butt out.â
For once, Luffy looked lost. A look of childish uncertainty replaced the care-free nature that lived inside him. You hated seeing him so unsure, but he was the captain. He was your captain and these situations called for him to make the best decision for his crew.Â
âMaybe this isnât such a great idea, Zoro.â
âWhen you met me tied up on that cross, what did I say?â
Oh, no. No. You knew where he was going with this. Luffy telling you the story in this very galley came flooding back in crystal clear clarity.Â
âWhat makes you think I wanna play pirates with you?â
âNo, the other thing.â
âI kill your kind for a living?â
âNo!â Zoro almost shouted the word. âComeâŠâ A groan of frustration left him as he finally looked away from Luffy. The desire to get Luffy to remember consuming him - to remember why he needed to do this.Â
And like a switch being flicked, a quiet, âOh,â sounded beside you, and you knew Luffy remembered.Â
âThat you made a promise to someone a long time ago to become the worldâs greatest swordsman.â
âThe only way to do that is to beat Mihawk in a duel and take his title. I intend to do just that.â
The words left him in a shout. All that determination rolled into a punch of syllables directed at Nami. At you. Anyone who tried to stand in the way of fulfilling that promise heâd made so long ago.Â
âCanât you just fight him without anyone dying?â
Your voice was sheepish, so small it barely carried over a whisper. Zoro wouldnât look at you. Youâd only earned a small flick of his attention before he replaced it back on the galleyâs island.Â
âTo be the worldâs greatest swordsman only one can live. There canât be two-â
âWhy not that just seems silly-â
âBecause that is just how it is!âÂ
Heâd dismissed you without a second thought. A teacher schooling an ignorant child who wasnât privy to how the world works. You wanted to throttle him.Â
âEven if you die in the process? Will you please do something?â
It hurt to see Nami so frantic. You were used to seeing her composed and smart. Maybe her anger when someone was doing something particularly idiotic. Never broken. Not like this.Â
Luffy regarded Zoro one last time and when you saw the soft smile press a hard line into his lips, you knew any chance of getting him to change Zoroâs mind was gone.Â
âItâs his dream, Nami. I canât get in the way of somebodyâs dream.âÂ
âWhat if I dreamed of being eaten by a sea beast what the-â
Usopp gently tugged on your conjoined hands to get your attention. His head shaking once to tell you now wasnât the time to make jokes or be angry. Wasnât it?Â
âWhatâs it going to take, huh? You want me to say youâre the best? Youâre the best. Okay? Youâre the best Iâve ever seen, but you are not better than him. And if you fight him tomorrow, youâre going to lose.â
Every word she spoke threatened to make your knees collapse. You didnât know anything about Dracule Mihawk, except his apparent love for overly large things. Big sword. Big hat. Big feather for said hat. There was no denying, however, the sheer power that radiated off him as he stood there unmoving while Zoro challenged him. The fact there hadnât even been a glimmer of worry that shifted through his eyes told you plainly he was more powerful than you could imagine.Â
And Zoro wanted to fight him. To the death. That manic laughter was beginning to bubble up again in your chest and you werenât sure if you were going to be able to keep it quiet this time.Â
Zoro finished sliding his last sword home inside his sash as he asked, âWhy do you even give a shit?â
âBecause you are my friend, you idiot.â
âYou said it yourself. You donât have any friends.â
If this was something Nami ever spoke of, it wasnât something sheâd shared with you. Maybe it had been true before youâd all met each other, but that wasnât true now. In that moment, it didnât matter if she remembered you were all there or not. His words hit a scab deep inside her and pulled and picked until he ripped it open.Â
Fresh blood from an old wound.Â
This time you werenât worried about accidentally saying anything. Warm fuzzy feelings were thrown to the back of your mind as your own blood thundered for you to come forward and defend her.Â
âAnd you are acting like a Grade A asshole.âÂ
You released Usoppâs hand to take a step forward. You had every intention of going to her and seeing if she would allow you to stand beside her. You never got the chance. Namiâs eyes looked at each and every one of you- her supposed crew mates - just before she turned on her heel and left the room.Â
Once she disappeared from sight it left only the four of you inside the galley. Luffy looked as if he was trying to process just what took place and Usopp, well, he was Usopp. He looked about as lost as you were in the grand scheme of things.Â
Your eyes flashed to Zoro and found him already looking at you. His wrists hung loosely over the hilt of the sword as he regarded you. He didnât soften as your eyes met his but seemed to harden further. A silent challenge for you to try and say something that he would only dismiss.Â
âWhat was that?â
âI told her the truth.âÂ
âNo,â you snarled. âYou told her whatever was most convenient for you and your feelings. You want to go get yourself killed, Zoro. Fine. But donât stand there and act like everyone is supposed to be happy about it.âÂ
âNo one told you that you had to be here or that you were even wanted here.â
âGuys-â Usopp interjected.Â
Neither of you were listening. You could feel your eyes narrow in on him. The pain that had moments ago made it impossible to breathe now hardened into stone. Â
âYou better hope Mihawk kills you, Zoro because if not Iâll make you wish he had.âÂ
A part of you meant what you said. Your anger was a living thing at how Zoro used his words as an extension of his swords. Your skin felt like brimstone with the current of fire underneath ready to burst free and set him on fire with how fucking angry you were at him. The way he spoke to Nami. To you. And yet, underneath all that building rage was a fear so palpable you could taste the cold sweat on your tongue.Â
You didnât want to hurt him. You didnât wish him dead. You just wanted him to admit that his ghosts screaming for battle also scared him too. Instead, you were locked in a staring contest you knew you would lose. Zoroâs eyes hardened until he was a mask; unreadable and untouchable. While you knew at any minute your regret was moments away from making itself known.Â
With one final look in his direction, you turned to storm after Nami. You needed to find her and make sure she was okay. She did have friends. She wasnât alone like she apparently thought she was.Â
You rounded the corner of the galley that led to Namiâs room. Usually, you wouldâve knocked or done something to announce yourself. Naan raised you to be aware of everyoneâs space and it was rude just to barge in but you werenât thinking. You were brimming with too many emotions; too many thoughts that fought to be the clearest. So, when you barged into Namiâs room an apology was already forming on your lips.Â
Until you saw her standing with a bag in hand.Â
âWhere are you going?â
The question hung between you like something fragile. Her own throat noticeably bobbed as she swallowed around something she was going to try and sell you.Â
âI was just going out-â
âDonât lie, Nami.â You moved the rest of the way inside her room and closed the door behind you. âNo one carries around an entire suitcase just because.â
Her tongue rolled around the bottom of her lip before she turned away from you. You took note that she was still holding onto her suitcase. She wasnât going to drop it, which meant however this went she planned on still leaving.Â
You didnât want another Zoro-style fight where insults were thrown to prove points or make someone hate you into letting them go. When she turned back to look at you, all the emotion was stripped from her and you prepared yourself for a fight.Â
âAre you going to tell Luffy?â
A sigh pressed past your lips as you shrugged.Â
âWhat am I going to tell him, Nami? You left because you got into an argument and someone said something you didnât like?â
âLike I give a shit what Zoro or any of you think.â
âIs that why youâre worried Iâm going to run and tell Luffy youâre leaving? Make it make sense.â
She turned on her heel and walked back over to a drawer sheâd left slightly open. Her hand pushed it back hard before she turned back to face you. The hand that held her suitcase dropped unceremoniously on the floor.Â
âI need to leave.â
âWhy? Nami, If this is about what Zoro said you know itâs not true.â
âWho are you kidding, Doc? We never chose to be a crew. We were all thrust together by circumstances and just stayed together.â
âUsopp and I chose you guys.â
Hollow laughter escaped her like she couldnât believe youâd claim this madhouse of a crew. Or maybe the joke was on you, and you just couldnât see you were the butt of the joke.Â
âYou donât get it-â
âHelp me understand!â
âI had a job to do before I met Luffy. I completed it and I need to get back.â
âIf that was true you wouldâve left a long time ago.â
âUgh, what is it with you? Why canât you just accept that Iâm leaving?â
âBecause I donât think you really want to go back,â you replied, cutting her off.Â
The two of you stood there in a silent face-off. Deep down, you both knew that you were right. There were plenty of opportunities for her to leave and go back to whatever life she had waiting for her, but sheâd stayed. Maybe it was because of convenience, at first, but somewhere along the line, it changed.Â
Nami was happy being a straw hat. Whatever life she had previously was one sheâd continue to run away from if she could, but something was calling her back. Whether it was family. Friends. Work. You would never know unless she told you.Â
âWhat makes you so sure?â
âPeople who want to sneak away in the night donât stay up showing a small town village girl maps they created in hopes of drawing a map of the world one day.âÂ
It was only a few nights ago when she had done it. Youâd been unable to sleep. Your stomach was tossing like the waves outside the ship. Youâd tried to make a tea to ease your stomach and it had failed miserably. Nami had found you curled up becoming one with the galleyâs kitchen and gently peeled you from the table. In the very corner she stood in is where sheâd sat with you under the light of a lamp and showed you every map sheâd ever drawn.
âThatâs just a dream, Doc.â
âItâs a good dream.â
She shook her head, her hand outstretched to take back the suitcase she'd discarded.Â
âDreams are just fairy tales for adults. Itâs better if you get used to disappointment now than later.â
You wanted to reach out and grab her as she moved past you towards the door. You still had time to do it. To shake her - yell at her - that they didnât hold the commodity on pain or a shitty life. Maybe you would never know what it was that Nami lost. She may never want to share with you that story of her life, and that was fine. You just wanted her to know she didnât have to keep running. That you would help keep her dreams alive and safe as long as she wanted them.Â
When you turned to follow her you found the door wide open and Nami gone. You couldâve chased after her, but it would only cause a scene. Sheâd made it clear sheâd meant to run in secret - you finding out was an unexpected accident. A part of you wanted to tell Luffy so you could both go charging after her and make her come back, but Luffy would never make anyone do something they didnât want to do.Â
How could it be in less than a day everything had gone to shit? Zoro was so eager to die and NamiâŠNami was just gone. With one last look around her room, you moved to sit in the chair sheâd been in earlier. The sound of her laughing as you tried on clothes brought the ghost of a smile to your lips and you wondered if youâd ever get to hear it again.Â
The Going Merry felt like a ghost ship.Â
Somewhere in the bridge, you were aware Usopp had run to hide there as the after-hours of fun began to take its toll. Luffy disappeared outside the ship and you wondered if anyone had noticed yet that the ship was one straw hat less.Â
Youâd been sitting inside Namiâs room since she left, unable to leave just in case sheâd changed her mind and came back. You wondered how long you could wait here before reality forced you to face it that the small family youâd chosen was falling apart.Â
Not much longer if the rising hues of the sunâs blood-orange tint on the night sky had anything to say about it.Â
With one last glance around the room, you headed back out onto the bridge. You didnât know where to go. You didnât feel like playing nursemaid, though you were sure Usopp wouldâve appreciated the help, and you didnât think you could keep quiet about a missing orange-haired girl if Luffy asked where she was.Â
You were starting to feel your own hangover begin to creep in and one thing was for certain, you were going to need some coffee.Â
Your footsteps sounded loud against the wood. The sound only reminds you of how empty the Merry had become. You pushed through the galleyâs French doors and found yourself walking into a Zoro deep in meditation. It was something he usually did in the confines of his room sandwiched between his crates of rum and the small window that looked port side. Youâd only ever seen him do it once on the stern of the ship in the early morning when no one was around.Â
Not that you were staring or watching or anything.
All three of his swords were set on the hanging baby blue table in front of the window seat where he now sat. His bandana was secured to his head about as tightly as his arms were to his chest. His eyes were still closed and you thought, maybe youâd be lucky enough to turn around and run back to the bridge. Youâd take your chances with Luffy.Â
âIf youâve come to talk me out of the duel Iâll tell you right now. Youâll just be wasting your time.â
He growled out the words from somewhere deep in his chest. It croaked in places as if heâd been asleep and your presence had woken him. Zoro hadnât opened his eyes yet, but he didnât need to see to know you were there.Â
Youâd come stomping in like a person ready to perform a verbal battle when all you wanted was some coffee and a little bit of calm beforeâŠ
âI came for coffee not to tell you how much of an inconsiderate asshole youâre being.âÂ
That got his eyes to open and focus on you. You only spared him a moment before you made your way to the cupboards. You were just going to focus on getting a cup and what you needed to make your coffee. You werenât going to acknowledge him.
Even as you reached the cabinets and started searching for the kettle, you could feel his eyes boring between your shoulders. It forced an irritation to set fire in your chest and that only seemed to grow worse until your hands were squeezing the iron of the handles. At any moment, you expected to see blood dripping from your palms.Â
You let out a deep breath and tried to push away all the things you wanted to say. To scream at him. You found the kettle and focused on filling it up and turning on the stove because if you didnât you would start yelling at him about how maddening he was. It was a good thing you had to look for the coffee grounds to steep them or else you wouldâve burst with how petty he was; the bitchest man alive.Â
If it wasnât for making your damn coffee you wouldâve crumbled into a sobbing mess as you struggled to find the words to make him stay. You were doing a pretty good job at ignoring him, but of course, Zoro could never just leave it alone. He always had to poke and prod and-Â
âYou seem to be struggling with that coffee.â
âAnd why does it matter to you? Are you suddenly in the mood to be caffeinated?â
âJust wondering how long itâs going to take for you to finish and get the hell out of the galley.âÂ
âOkay, thatâs enough! Enough, Zoro!â
You hated how your voice betrayed you. The way it broke as his name left your lips. What you hated more was how he responded to the exact sound as it touched his ears. His body language was still rigid but he sat up straighter. His arms dropped down from his body to sit in his lap.Â
âI get that this means something important to you. Itâs a lifelong goal and you want to accomplish it, but how can you expect to accomplish anything when you push people away.âÂ
âIâve accomplished plenty on my own before I ever meet any of you.â
âThatâs fantastic. Great for you,â you shot back, your voice dripping with sarcasm. âWhat Iâm saying is, you donât have to do everything alone anymore. We are all here for you-â
âWhy do you even care? What was it you said, that I better hope Mihawk kills me or Iâm going to wish he had.â
You knew saying that would come back to haunt you. How many times had Naan told you speaking out of anger never made a situation better? Zoro thought youâd said it because you hated him to the point you hoped heâd lose.Â
âI only said that because you are being an ass.â
âI didnât know you hated me enough to hope I died.â
âI donât hate you, Zoro! And the last thing I want is to see you get hurt or worse fucking die. Why canât you see what it would do to the people who care about you? Why canât you see that I like you, you idiot!â
The words stumbled out before you could catch them. Your chest felt like it was on the verge of collapsing while your lungs refused to release the breath it held captive. It felt like a lifetime passed between the two of you, and yet you knew it was only seconds. It was long enough for the sting of tears to crown your eyes as you waited for Zoro to do something. Anything.Â
What made it worse was how unmoved he appeared by your confession. Your words didnât seem to cause any reaction from him other than his usual empty stare. The cool look of emotionless stone replaced the teasing sparks of mischief that gleamed in his eyes or the smiles that warmed his face when he was surrounded by his crew.Â
You wouldâve given anything for any emotion besides the empty reply you received.
âYou donât even know me.âÂ
âI want to know you, really know you, but first, I need the chance to do that. I canât do that if youâre dead.â
âIâm not going to lose.â
âYou donât know that!â
âItâs obvious that you donât believe in me. Like Nami. You both think I canât do it.â
âOh my god, Zoro - enough! We are just worried for you. We give a shit about you still being alive. I want to be able to wake up and hear your grumpy ass voice or find you drinking on the stern. I want to be able to have conversations with you while you begrudgingly go with me to forge ingredients and put flowers in my hair. I want to see you look at me the way you did standing alone on the Merry like you did tonight.â You took in a shaky breath as you took a cautious step toward his seated position. âYou have infuriatingly crawled your way inside my bones, Roronoa Zoro, and have taken hold. I donât want to know what life is like without you.â
Your breathing was fast and shaky as if you'd been running. It didnât matter that the tears youâd struggled to contain fell freely down your cheeks or that your chest heaved, ready to cave in at any moment.Â
You were vaguely aware of the Sun beginning to peak its way inside the windows. The timer on what could possibly be the last time you were with Zoro coming to an end. Maybe that was why when he moved to stand you allowed yourself to hope. You let yourself believe maybe your admission meant enough to make him stay, but you watched as he silently slid each katana into their holsters on his sash and it felt like the ground opened up and swallowed you whole.Â
âWhy canât you just admit you have feelings for me?â
It was true that you didnât know much about the world or how it works. Youâd never been out of the village. Never had many friends outside of Usopp. The boys in the village are always ridiculous or sometimes cruel or just too stupid to look at. You imagined you had to be broken since all youâd cared about was becoming the greatest doctor you could be. So, maybe youâd read into the small glances too much or the way when you almost fell and heâd secured you close to him with his chin dipping into your neck. It was subtle but you felt it.Â
People didnât just do that when they didnât like someone, did they?
Once heâd made sure everything was secured inside his sash, Zoro came around the table and walked until he stood beside you. He wouldnât look at you and just kept looking at the battle ahead because now the sun had risen and he had a promise to fulfill.Â
âI donât give a shit about you.â His words stabbed into your chest and twisted. It felt worse than anything youâd ever felt; a storm cloud of emotions that darkened your mind. But underneath that, you could hear the tremor in his own voice as he forced himself to tell you. âYouâre just another one of Luffyâs little add-ons to an already big enough freak show of a crew.â
âWhy are you so scared to give a shit?â
âScared of what?â This time when he snapped it whipped his head to look at you. The soft touch of his eyes hardened into something wild and desperate. âOf you?â
âEither youâre scared or you are a coward. Only someone whoâs a coward canât admit to the truth.â
âOr maybe youâre just delusional.â
Maybe you were. You didnât know how the world worked. How people worked. Youâd traveled into uncharted territory when Zoro began to worm his way inside your brain and hold your heart hostage. It was possible youâd only seen what youâd hoped to see.Â
His jaw ticked to whatever irritated thought he had while he looked at you. You expected him to say something else. To finally tear you completely down until there was nothing left. Instead, he turned away from you and started towards the galleyâs French doors dismissing you completely.Â
You listened as he pushed through with the soft sound of the doors swinging on their hinges filling the space. You werenât going to follow. You couldnât watch him walk out knowing he may never come back.Â
It felt like an eternity passed before you heard the first clash of blades outside the Merry. You were still standing where Zoro had left you. Unable to move, at first, in case you take that move forward and restart time. As if you had the ability to keep it suspended and him safe.Â
It wasnât until that ringing of metal scraping against metal resonated inside the wood of the Merry that your body jerked back into the present. You already knew Luffy would be there with Zoro; believing in him and cheering him on. Usopp too simply because he knew the power of what support could do for someone.Â
And NamiâŠ
Nami had to be long gone by now and you? You were here cowering inside the safety of a vessel so you didnât have to see. The sound of a body colliding into the dock gave yours a jolt.Â
Sure, Zoro had ripped out your heart after youâd admitted what you hadnât been able to admit to yourself. Youâd done it, selfishly, in hopes that it would keep him in the confines of the safety of the ship, but that wasnât Zoro.Â
He wasnât about safety and backing down from anything. From the moment youâd met him, youâd seen the dedication he held when it came to his ability to fight. The fire drove him to consume and lay waste to those who stood in his way, but underneath the harshness of the fire laid something soft. Heâd defended that little girl in the bar. He stood up for those who preyed on villages and mercilessly attacked women and children.
For all the drinking and hard-headed idiotic things Zoro could do he was one of the best men youâd ever meet. There wasnât anything that Zoro hadnât proved he could do. So, why couldnât it be possible for him to beat Mihawk?Â
With your mind decided, you pushed your back off the island counter and took off running at full speed. You would support him no matter what was shared between you. Zoro deserved it: he deserved to be believed in.Â
You were going up and over the stairs to take the ramp down to the dock when you saw Mihawk stab something small into his chest. You could feel your knees buckle. The way your body went limp and forced your legs to collapse in on themselves as they smashed into the wood of the ramp.Â
Zoroâs arms were spread out in Y shape. The edges of his swords barely missed the armâs of Mihawk, the handles of his swords touching the design on his trench. He was close, but not close enough to do any damage and not far enough away from the small blade that Mihawk embedded deep in his chest.Â
âNo.â
Your denial came out in a hush and was carried away by the wind.Â
Mihawk told him something. Maybe about retreating and forfeiting the match to save his life. It was enough to radiate rage through Zoroâs body and hardened his eyes with determination.Â
Zoro would never run. It wasnât in his character.Â
Out of the corner of your eye, you watched Nami approach the dock. She came to stand between Luffy and Usopp and for a split moment, everything felt like it was going to be okay. Nami was back. The universe was working on fixing all the wrongs that happened in the last few hours.
Mihawk pulled the small blade from out of his chest and you watched as Zoro stumbled back. His swords helped him to stand back up on his feet to face him.Â
âIâll do you the honor of killing you with Yoru.â
No. No.Â
The word almost clawed its way out of your throat. A possession so deep to halt time ached through your veins until you thought it was almost possible to do it. As if the very fabric of the air would rip open at any minute just to save him.Â
You couldnât miss the satisfied smirk that curled Zoroâs lips.Â
âNow thatâs more like it.âÂ
You watched as he unsheathed the Wado Ichimonji and brought it up to his mouth. His body stood straighter as he connected the two swords as one and began to spin them. Youâd seen him fight plenty of times with just the two swords. The sheer strength he had just using them didnât seem to compare to anyone else. Youâd seen him use his three-sword style only once before and nothing compared to the sheer strength and speed that came from him placing that blade between his teeth.Â
Hope blossomed in your chest as you watched him spin the swords. His body took off moments later as Mihawk moved to rush forward, meeting him in a clash that rattled like thunder from the impact. Zoro came to a sliding stop just feet in front of you. His swords still lifted up to deflect the blow from Mihawkâs blade before they crumbled to pieces in front of him.
Zoro locked eyes with you, your body mimicking his, as he removed the Wado Ichimonji from between his teeth. You could feel fresh tears streaming down your cheeks turning your vision blurry. With his eyes locked on you, he used it to help him get to his feet.Â
If your voice wouldâve worked you wouldâve told him to stop. That he didnât need to turn around but you knew he would. This was Zoro. The most infuriating man on the planet and honored bound to his beliefs. You clamored to get to your feet. To run to him to try and keep him from turning to face Mihawk.Â
He must have seen it on your face. You were probably doing a terrible job of keeping your thoughts off your face. All the panic.Â
A soft smile slid across his lips. It wasnât big enough to crack his lips or show teeth. It never reached his eyes, but it didnât have to. It was a smile just meant for you. His way of telling you it was alright; to soothe you before the final blow came. Â
For one last fleeting moment, you looked at one another and you imagined yourselves back inside the ship. Zoro sitting in his hammock being his usual broody self while you clean up the wound on his chest. You could practically hear him mumbling some shit about you not being gentle against the lip of a newly opened bottle of rum.Â
It felt so real that, for a split second, you thought it was. Youâd been so caught up in your own daydream that you hadnât realized heâd turned his back on you. Now he was facing Mihawk his arms spread open wide giving him a perfect kill shot of his chest.Â
âWounds on the back are a swordsman's greatest shame.â
âMagnificent.â
In one swift motion, you watched as Mihawk sliced through the air with his blade cutting perfectly through Zoroâs chest.Â
âNO!â
This time you did find your voice and it was unhinged. All that panic you pushed to the side and all that hope youâd allowed yourself to blindly follow came crashing down like a wave. It strangled every last bit of feeling until all that was left was the crushing weight of despair. You were aware that Luffy was there at his side. You could hear him calling out to Zoro with his hands pressed at his body.Â
You were sprinting down the last of the ramp and onto the dock. You couldnât remember bending down to be at his side but your eyes could see him. It was Zoro but not the Zoro you were used to.Â
Already he was turning ghostly pale as the wound continued to bleed. We have to stop the bleeding. There was so much blood and he was in so much pain. The wound Mihawk created went from the left shoulder down to the beginning of his sash. It was massive. Zoroâs breathing was shaky and would quiet down until you werenât even sure if he was even taking in a full breath.Â
You reached over to feel his pulse. It weakly flutters against your ring and middle finger as you press down. When you pulled away you noticed your forearm streaked with blood.Â
âMonkey D. Luffy - what is your goal?â
âIâm going to become King of the Pirates.â
âKing of the Pirates, eh? Thatâs a much more treacherous path than even defeating me.â
âI donât care.â Luffy looked back at Mihawk. His usual determination in his voice, but it missed the warmth and it trembled with each word. Whether it was from anger or sadness you would never know. âItâs what I am going to do.â
âHmm. Maybe you will at that. This world could use a few more wild cards. Roronoa Zoro, Itâs too soon for you to die. Grow strong and come find me. Iâll be waiting.âÂ
You wanted to scream at him to go to hell. You wished you could send him there yourself, but Zoro was still alert. He was fighting and that meant maybe it was his fate to be the one to send the big feathered asshole there himself.Â
You wanted to tell him that. To make a joke. You owed him the one about the Marine and the Pirate walking into a bar. You just couldnât bring yourself to speak. Your hands were trembling violently every time you moved them to try and touch him. So, you clenched them down and kept them pressed into your thighs.Â
Usopp came to kneel beside Luffy and Nami slowly made her way to stand next to you.Â
âHeâs losing so much blood. Doc, what should we do?â
What should we do?Â
What were you supposed to tell them? You were the doctor. Their doctor. Itâs why Luffy had asked you to join. It was your job to heal them and keep them well.Â
Doc, what should we do?Â
You should know the answer. You should be the one ordering them around and telling them what to bring you to start staunching the wound.Â
âHeâs gonna be okay. Hey Zoro, can you hear me? He said it was too soon for you to die.â
âLuffy-â
Fuck. Zoro sounded so weak. All the broody, snarky asshole comments that heâd made were full of life. Each word was rich with the baritone of his voice that dripped down your skin like honey. That same voice now barely rose above a whisper. Â
âIf I fail to become the worldâs greatest swordsmanâŠyouâll be disappointed. Right?â
Each word came out strained. With each breath, he fought to take through the gash in his chest.Â
âYou could never fail me.â
Zoro opened his eyes and looked over at his Captain. The pain began to make tears spring into his eyes and run down the corners.Â
âNever. Again. From now until I beat him.â A grunt of pain burst from his mouth as he grabbed his body to the hilt of the Wado Ichimonji and lifted it up to the sky. His free hand covered his face as if he was ashamed. âTo become the world's greatest swordsman I will never lose again!â
Zoro swore it with such conviction you expected him to stand up at any moment and walk himself back to the Merry. Your assessment was wrong, however, when he suddenly went limp with the sword and his arm crashing down against the dock.Â
âZoro?â
This time he was unresponsive. The blood pooling around his middle and seeping into the front of his gi blossomed into a flower that grew ever brighter with each passing second.Â
âDoc!â Usopp shouted. It was enough to finally tear your eyes away from Zoro and focus on something else. âWhat do we do? Youâre the doctor here.â
âRight.â The word came out in a huff through your nose.Â
Your eyes scanned the scene that was laid out in front of you. It was time to be scientific about this. To focus on what was fixable in front of you and to put whatever feelings you had to the side.Â
Why did that feel easier said than done?
They were still waiting for you to direct them. Six pairs of eyes equally as lost as you waiting for direction on how to save their crew mate -Â their friend - in front of them. Your tongue lashed out to nervously wet your bottom lip as you scrambled to your feet.Â
âWe - we need to move him back to the ship. We have to stop the bleeding.â
âOkay, right good call, Doc,â Luffy offered as you all scrambled to grab a limb.Â
âJust make sure that when we lift him we do it carefully-â
Luffy and Usopp didnât wait for you and Nami to grab a hold of either leg. They just lifted and his legs flopped against the deck.Â
âJesus, she said to do it together and carefully!â Nami snapped.Â
âIâm sorry Iâm just nervous.â
Usopp was obviously as panicked as you.Â
âItâs alright, let's just grab him and get him back to the Merry.âÂ
The four of you grabbed a hold of Zoro and this time smoothly picked him up. Luffy and Usopp carried his upper body and thank god he did. You werenât expecting him to feel like you were trying to carry a sea cow. Scratch that. It felt like you were trying to carry a sea beast.Â
The first steps you took were good, but by the time you started making it up the ramp back into the Merry, you were all struggling not to drop your end.Â
âEasy! Easy! Jesus, be careful!â
Nami instructed the boys - mostly Usopp - as they took the last step down onto the bridge.Â
âGuys. I donât know how much longer Iâll be able to hold my end,â Usopp grunted.Â
âWe are almost there, Usopp. Just hold on.âÂ
âIâm trying but this guy is really heavy.â
To prove his point, Usopp started shuffling backward quicker than you expected. He shoved his shoulder into the double doors of the galley forcing you all to catch up with him. The movement causes you and Nami to bump into one another as you each hold on to one of his legs.Â
âEasy. Donât drop him!â
âI didnât. Heâs just heavy. I mean, heâs got a really big head. Itâs, like, freakishly big.â
âNow is not the time, Usopp,â you grunted as you all moved to set him down on the island.Â
âWhat does that have to do with anything?âÂ
The question came from Nami as she made her way around the galleyâs kitchen. She was searching through cupboards at a furious rate and you didnât have to ask what it was she was searching for. Sheâd heard you loud and clear about needing to stop the bleeding. You had some clean linens that were stashed inside your room. You shouldâve gone for them, but suddenly, seeing Zoro lifeless on the island of the galleyâŠyou couldnât recall any of your training.Â
âZoro? Hey, can you hear me?â
Luffyâs soft question was drowned out by Usopp asking where the first aid kit was.Â
âWhy would we need a first aid kit when we have a doctor?â Nami shot back.Â
âThatâs right. Doc, what are we doing?â
They were looking to you to direct them. You are the doctor. This was your time to shine to be able to prove that you were worth the space Luffy had offered you. So, why couldnât you move? Your brain was moving at a thousand miles a minute and yet every time it landed on free space it came up empty. If it wasnât empty, it was screaming that Zoro was dying and you werenât going to be able to save him.Â
Nami returned to the head of Zoro and was holding it in place. You werenât sure why. The wound was on his chest. Usopp was now thrashing around the room looking for rags.Â
âDoc!âÂ
This time Nami smacked your arm to get your attention. Your feet moved of their own accord to the edge of the island as you reached out and started peeling back the soaked fabric of his shirt.Â
There have been times when you were daydreaming in the privacy of your room that you imagined peeling back Zoroâs shirt just like this. To expose the taut muscles underneath. In all of your daydreams, it was never like this. Not like this.Â
A sharp hiss of air cut through your teeth as you exposed the large gash to the room. It was approximately two - almost three inches in width. The first and second layer of skin was severed leaving the third exposed and dangerously close to opening it to severe infection.Â
âThese towels are all I could find. Whereâs he bleeding from?â
âEverywhere.â
âNami, I need you to add pressure with the towels. I have to run to my room and get some supplies.âÂ
âOk, but Doc hurry.âÂ
Asking for speed felt like an understatement. There wasnât a soul alive inside that ship who didnât realize that Zoro was beginning to show fewer and fewer signs of breathing. His skin was taking on a grayish tone like a corpse making his green hair look sickly against the grotesque hue.Â
You didnât bother telling her you knew he was dying. You just needed out of that room.Â
Your feet carried you out of memory to your room which sat directly across the hall from Zoro. How many times had you gone to go inside your own room and paused, considering knocking on his just to see him leaning against his open door? The thought of never having the chance to make it a reality spurred you inside your room.Â
You knew you were going to need thread and a good stitching needle to close the wound. What you really needed was something to fight infection both outwardly and inward. The tonic would have to wait. Without further thought, your hands started going through every jar that held a gathered plant and salves youâd previously made. What you needed was the same Chiterra youâd used on Zeff mere hours ago. Itâd been left inside your satchel.Â
You ran to its place sat on your bed and upended the bag onto the mattress. Your hands flung everything off until you came to the jade-green bottle and held it up to the light. You didnât need the sunlight to tell you there wasnât enough in the bottle. Youâd applied most of it on Zeff.Â
With a scream, you hurled the bottle against the wall. All that panic was turning to rage and you couldnât keep it bottled in. You went to grab the things you did have and noticed on the small desk in the corner the snowdrop Zoro had placed behind your ear.Â
Suddenly, you were standing back inside that forest. The feeling of his fingertips gliding over your ear as he deposited the flower, hand lingering longer than it shouldâve. There was no mistaking the way he looked at you then was the same way heâd looked at you on the deck. The same way heâd looked at you seconds before Mihawk and tried to slice him in half.Â
No. Zoro wasnât going to die today.Â
Grabbing what you had, you rushed back out of your room and to the galley.Â
âWe need to go to the Baratie and ask if they have any supplies.â
âWhat are you talking about?â Nami asked, flabbergasted. âHow do you not have the supplies?â
âI used most of it last night, mending Zeff.âÂ
âWhy the hell were you doing that?!â
âIt was to help, Luffy-âYou took a deep breath and pressed your hands out, as if it was going to push all the panic youâd pressed down from climbing back up again. âIt doesnât matter now. Luffy, can you go to Baratie?â
âIâm not really hungry right now, Doc.â
âLuffy, no-â deep breath. Breathe. âI need something that is able to fight an infection. Something we can put on the skin.â
âRight! Right, I can do that!â
Luffy looked over Zoroâs body one last time before he sprinted out of the kitchen. It left the three of you waiting there until he returned but you were done with waiting. You were a doctor and it was about damn time you acted like one.Â
If only you could get your hands to stop shaking.Â
âUsopp, I need you to take this needle over to the stove and sterilize it for me, please.âÂ
âIâm on it, Doc.â
âWhat do you need me to do?â
Nami patiently waited to take whatever direction you would give her. You were sure if you told her to bring you fifty buckets of seawater she would do it without question.Â
âJust go back up towards his head and talk to him. Iâm going to sew up the wound and, well, itâs not going to feel too great.â
âOkay. I can do that.â
You both went to move around the other to get into position when you lightly grabbed her arm in passing. She turned to you with eyes too wide to be anything else but shocked and you wondered if you mirrored her expression.Â
âThank you for coming back.âÂ
You werenât sure why you needed to tell her that, especially at a time like this, but you meant it. No matter what was happening right now, Nami had proven to be the sister youâd never had. Without her here now you might have been lost.Â
You let your hand fall away as you came to the side of Zoro and began to unravel the thread. You had most of it unraveled when Usopp showed up beside you and handed over a very sterile needle. You threaded the black thread through the stitching needle and decided to start working on the smallest area.Â
Maybe by the time you finished with it the tremors in your hands might have disappeared.Â
Luffy arrived back from Baratie with Zeff and Sanji in tow. All three of them walked in just as you finished the last crisscross of stitching on Zoroâs chest.Â
âOy, I was wondering why he was asking for me,â Zeff huffed as he came around the opposite side of the island. âI couldâve sworn you said you were a doctor.â
âI am. I just donât have anything to put over the wounds to support healing or to keep them from getting infected. I asked Luffy to go in case you did.âÂ
Sanji set down a basket on the island and you couldnât keep your brow from quirking up in question.Â
âAre we having a picnic?â
âVery cute, smart ass,â Zeff shot back. âYellowtail skin is known to have enzymes in the skin that staunch the wounds and speed up the healing process.âÂ
As he explained it all to you, Sanji unrolled a set of very sharp-looking knives and handed the second largest to Zeff. Right after he unrolled the yellowtail from its wrapping and held it out for the older man to take.Â
Zeff stroked the fish in appreciation before he began to cut it. Once the head was removed and he sliced it in half, you all watched as he carefully thinly sliced the yellowtailâs skin in sections. Each section of the fish was cut and placed on a plate until the entire fish was flayed. When he finished with the last slice, Zeff motioned for someone to grab the plate as he made his way around to join you on your side of the island.
âItâs my turn to teach you a little something, girl.âÂ
You wouldnât deny that you didnât know about yellowtail skin being able to do any of this. As you watched Zeff carefully layer it over your stitch work, you wondered if Naan was even aware of it.Â
âIs he going to be okay?â
Usoppâs question was so soft you wondered if heâd even spoken. His eyes, like the rest of you, all focused on the motionless body of your crew mate.Â
âIâm not going to lie to you. Heâs lost a lot of blood. Iâm sure your doctor can even tell you that. It might be too late for him.â
âBut it might not be.âÂ
Luffy wasnât going to give up on Zoro. He refused to think of any possibilities where Zoro didnât wake up. You wish you shared the same belief as him. That Zeffâs words didnât sit heavily in your thoughts because it was the same one you had.
âHeâs got one foot in each world right now, caught between life and death. You have to find a way to keep him tethered to our world. Talk to him. Tell him stories. Sing him sea shanties for all I care. He may not reply, but at least heâll know his crew is still with him.âÂ
âThatâs ridiculous,â you scoffed. âSinging lovely little tunes isnât going to save anybody.âÂ
âItâs not about science or whatâs up here,â Zeff replied, a thick finger poking you dead between the eyes. âSometimes itâs the heart of the matter that saves people.âÂ
Naan wouldâve hollered about Zeff being the biggest idiot sheâd ever met if sheâd heard one word of that. A part of you wanted to ask if he could tell by the look he gave you.Â
âWe need to wrap him.â
âGod, does that mean we gotta hold him up again?â Usopp whined.Â
âYes,â you shot back. âUsopp it does mean I need you guys to help hold him up.â
âI can help you. If you like.â
Sanji stepped around Zeff to come to your side. All his earlier flirting was replaced by the genuine desire to help. You were sure if Zoro knew Sanji had helped him in any way he would implode, but beggars couldnât be choosers.Â
âSure. I would appreciate it. Thank you, Sanji.âÂ
You waited on bated breath to hear a cheesy pick-up line and found yourself coming up empty. You got your wraps ready as you motioned for Sanji to lift him and when you finished, Nami offered to let Zoro stay in her room. You didnât help carry him inside and figured it was only a few short feet from the galley to her room.Â
You needed air. You needed rum. You still needed to go fix up your room.Â
The only thing you did was the first on that list.Â
Youâd found yourself standing on the stern of the ship. Your arms hung over the railing as you took in the endless blue that surrounded you and the last few stragglers of ships remaining from the night before. You tried to let your mind relax by wondering who was on those ships; the stories Usopp could create would either leave you in wonder or hysterics.Â
That was what you really wanted. Your best friend to tell you a story as far-fetched as the one youâd all been a part of in less than twenty-four hours. You went to remove yourself from the rail when Luffy appeared beside you. His eyes scanned out over everything before him before he turned to smile at you.Â
âHey, Doc.â
âHey Luffy. Everything alright?â
He still looked shaken by everything that had happened. The smile heâd tried to plaster on his face while Zoro was still conscious on the dock was replaced now with something you never thought youâd see: fear.Â
Monkey D. Luffy was afraid. You wanted to reach out and hug him. To remind him that life came with no playbook and you were all just fumbling around trying to make the best decisions without ever knowing the outcomes.Â
âYeah. No. Maybe Nami was right and I shouldâve tried harder to stop Zoro.â
âLuffy, Zoro was always going to do what he wanted. I donât think you telling him not to do it wouldâve mattered. What he wanted to know was that you were in his corner believing he could do it. You did the right thing as a Captain. As a friend.â
As the words left you, you knew every single one of them was true. The stubborn idiot was going to go out and do this duel no matter what. Itâs what heâd trained himself to do and why he continued to train. Who were any of you to tell him all of that was for nothing?Â
While Luffy listened and filtered your words through his head, you could see the small worry lines that had creased his forehead begin to ease. The darkness behind his eyes lightened just enough that you could feel his sunshine beginning to peek through the storm.Â
âIâm always going to be in every one of your corners because you guys are in mine.âÂ
You tried to give him a weak smile. Something that could equal the one heâd given you. You could feel it falling flat and decided it was safer to look back over the side of the Merry or at your hands.Â
It was a mistake. How youâd missed the blood - Zoroâs blood - that had caked on your fingers and between them was beyond you. Instantly, you felt like you needed to bathe. To scrub your skin raw before it leaves a deeper imprint like an unwanted tattoo.Â
Luffy must have noticed your panic because he moved closer to you, shoulder to shoulder, and gently reached out to stop you from scratching through your skin.Â
âWhy are you out here, Doc?â
His question was light. Soft. A whisper that forced you to hang your head before a flood of emotion threatened to burst from the dam in your chest.Â
âI shouldâve believed in him more, like you do. I shouldâve shown him or had more faith in who he is.â
âThe Demon Pirate Hunter?â
That did make a snort of a laugh leave you as you looked up at Luffy.Â
âYour first mate.â
You were surprised when Luffy suddenly wrapped a long arm around you and pulled you into a tight hug. You thought you were going to have to tap out and tell him it was too much. Damn, could he give a good hug. But you didnât. You wrapped an arm around his waist and allowed yourself to be consumed for just a little while by sunshine.Â
âYou did an amazing job today, Doc.âÂ
You pressed a scoff into his chest before you pushed away and secured yourself back over the railing.Â
âThatâs really sweet Luffy, but no I didn't. I was sloppy. Unprepared. My response time was shit.â Your delay in helping Zoro could be what cost him his life. You didnât want to say it out loud. The guilt - shame - of that hard fact sat like stones in your gut. âIf Naan were here sheâd have my ass.â
âBut you saved him.â
Luffy looked so confused and you werenât sure you wanted to explain it to him. He believed in you more than you believe in yourself.Â
âNo. All I did was make him comfortable if he died.âÂ
It felt like you were speaking through molasses. The idea of him dying filled your body with such raw grief it threatened to topple you over.Â
âThatâs not true.â
It was true, and Naan wouldâve used this moment as another one of her hard lessons. One just to prove why getting attached to others was never good for a healer. Everything sheâd ever taught you had gone right out the window as you watched Zoro fall. All the training and knowledge wasted as you acted like a lovesick girl and not the one who maybe couldâve saved him if she hadnât been so lost in her head.Â
No. You werenât who Luffy thought you were or who youâd even thought you were. You shouldâve stocked up on ingredients more. Noted all the tools you were missing and got them instead of worrying about a world full of promise and adventure.Â
âIâm going to go wash up, Luffy. Iâll see you in a bit.â
âMake sure you stop in to see Zoro, Doc. I know heâd like to hear from you.âÂ
You didnât know what to say. Would he want to see someone who selfishly tried to keep him from being who he was? You could still hear the last conversation playing in your head. The way his voice cracked just enough to notice.Â
âIâll be sure to do that.â
You didnât mean it. You werenât sure if you could face him but another part of you wondered if the last memory you wanted to carry of him was him lying bleeding on Baratieâs dock.Â
The bath had been scolding hot and your skin was still slightly red from how furiously youâd scrubbed it. Youâd had no intention of going in to see Zoro.Â
Not yet.Â
But as you left your room you heard Namiâs voice raise and you bolted toward the sound. What if something was happening to Zoro? Instead of the possibility of you going into doctor mode, you noticed it was yelling of a different kind.
âAnd I would like it if Zoro wasnât dying in my bed!â
No! Not dyingâŠ
You came shooting around the corner and into the room. Your eyes take in a small-looking Luffy as Nami stands on the opposite side of where Zoro lies. Her eyes were piercing and sharp and full of anger directed solely at your captain.Â
âI canât get in the way of someoneâs dream, Nami.â
âWhatâs going on here?â
Namiâs gaze moved over to you and it made you want to stop in your tracks. It felt like she was almost blaming you for the dying friend in her bed.Â
âNothing. I was just leaving.â
âAgain?âÂ
The word came out before you could stop it. The irritation sparked from her in waves. You hadnât meant to say it but you were too emotionally exhausted to care.Â
âAgain?â Luffy asked, visibly lost.Â
âIt's nothing,â Nami quickly dismissed your words as she set down the book sheâd been reading. âJust a slip of the tongue. Right, Doc?â
She wasnât giving you time to answer her because she wasnât trying to have more conversation. Not with you and definitely not with Luffy. Somehow, youâd both ended up in the shit yard.Â
You turned to watch her retreat and didnât take one step forward until you were sure she was gone. You reached out to Luffy and touched his arm briefly before you dropped it back down to your side.Â
âYou okay?â
âYeah, I just-âÂ
He was back to looking lost. His eyes searched for answers ingrained in the wood of the ship and coming up short. He looked up at Zoro still lying motionless in bed and turned in your direction.Â
âIâm going to get the Wado Itchy Monkey ready for him when he wakes up.âÂ
âItchy monkey?â
âHis sword.â
Now this was the Luffy you knew. It wasnât as cheerful as it shouldâve been but you would take this smile over the wounded look any day.Â
âOh, right. The Itchy Monkey.â
You hoped somehow Zoro could hear this and was screaming.Â
âDo you want to come with me? I think Sanji is also with Usopp in the galley cooking something. If you want to eat.â
âMaybe later. I need to do an assessment first.â
âOh, yeah. Let us know how it goes.â
âYou got it, Captain.âÂ
âWhy do you call me that?â
âCall you what?Â
âCaptain. No one else does.â
His question took you back. Was there something else he wanted to be referred to instead of Captain? Heâd seemed to make it pretty clear his dream wasnât just finding the One Piece, but having a crew all his own.Â
âUhm, because youâre my Captain and that is false. Usopp does say itâŠsometimes. In between calling himself Captain Usopp.âÂ
You waited to see that infamous smile brighten his face. The one that reminded you of the good that was housed inside him and the painful realization he was still so young. What you got instead was a softer smile, one that still reached his eyes but spoke plainly of gratitude.Â
âMake sure that when youâre done you get something to eat. Thatâs an order.âÂ
You offered up a mock salute as you replied, âAye, Captain.âÂ
It felt ridiculous. It felt silly but it also felt good. Like you werenât standing in a room where Zoro was slipping in and out of death. Silly like sitting back in a restaurant. All five of you enjoying a meal filled with laughter and teasing conversation.Â
With a heavy sigh, you turned to face the unconscious man before you. He looked incredibly peaceful and if you didnât know any better you wouldâve believed he was just sleeping. But his breathing was still too shallow and there wasnât any eye movement indicative of dreaming or thought.Â
He looked like a shell of the man youâd fallen in love with. The color hadnât returned to his skin and there was a noticeable sheen of sweat to his forehead and upper lip. Gently, you pressed the back of your hand to his forehead and felt the warmth to his skin.Â
You figured there would be a fever, but not so soon. You werenât sure if it was a good or bad sign but you wouldnât dwell on it. A fever meant he needed medicine, which was your specialty. You set to work pulling what you needed out of your satchel and began to make something to help reduce the fever and hopefully help whatever infection was in his blood.Â
After you steeped all the ingredients through the strainer you walked over to Zoro and gently lifted up his head. You had some trouble wiggling the nose of the bottle between his lips when you remembered you still had to contend with his teeth.
âA pain in the ass even while dying,â you groaned.
You placed his head back down against the pillow and quickly ran through your options. You tried to prop him up as much as you could before you placed your hand on his chin and applied a small amount of pressure until you felt his jaw begin to open. Finally, you were able to deposit some of the medicine between his lips. Your hands gently coax his throat to swallow by running your fingers against the skin.Â
Once it was done you placed the jar behind you on Namiâs dresser and went to get a cool washcloth. You werenât sure if you were going to stay until you started wiping the sweat from his brow.Â
You found yourself sitting in the chair Nami no doubt abandoned and the book sheâd been reading to him. The tale of Noland. The liar. A man who claimed to have seen something and there was never any proof.Â
Liar. Thatâs what stuck out to you the most.Â
Youâd been staring at the cloth in your hands, fingers picking at the fraying pieces unable to look at him. Not until now.Â
You werenât sure why you felt so unsure of whether you should be there. If you should bother staying. The last time youâd spoken heâd made it clear what he thought of you and yetâŠ
Reaching out you took hold of his hand for the first time. It felt wrong doing it like this but what were the chances of you being able to do it again? Your thumb moved slowly over his knuckles as if trying to outline each one perfectly to memory.Â
âHow are you supposed to train me to kick your ass if you donât wake up?â
Zoro didnât show any signs of stirring at your words. You expected him to turn his head at any minute. His eyes flew open in horror at the idea of you ever kicking his ass. You could practically hear all the remarks heâd make.Â
âThe day you ever kicked my ass is the day hell freezes over.â
âItâll take a miracle for you to even get close.â
But they were the only ones that you heard in your head. Figments of previous conversations warped to fit the crazy narrative that he would be able to answer you back.Â
âYou know, if Naan couldâve seen how I acted today she wouldâve killed me.â
An empty laugh left you as you looked up at his face. There wasnât the usual dart of a raised brow in teasing. No hard stare that made you feel like he was silently yelling at you for getting on his nerves.Â
âShe wouldâve been disappointed. She taught me over the years that a doctor who canât think on their feet at lightning speed is useless. A doctor who got emotionally attached to their patients was equally as useless.â You tore your eyes away from him to look at the safety of your lap. Unable to look at him as you spoke, âI was useless at being able to help you when it mattered.â
The sob youâd been struggling to hold back erupted in a burst that forced you to cover it with your hand. You couldnât let anyone else hear you as you shattered.Â
âMaybe that was my final lesson from her. To prove that caring for all of you the way I do is only going to harm you later.â
What good was having a doctor who was only going to fail them later? But Zoro still being alive proved that it wasnât just medicine that kept people going, but their own desire to live. That was all you wanted. You didnât need him to wake up and proclaim his undying devotion to you. Even if he woke up still hating you, you would accept it. Anything was good enough for you if it meant youâd get to see him smile one last time.Â
Walking into the galley you expected it to be either quiet or at least filled with light conversation. Maybe even a couple of gloomy faces.Â
What you hadnât expected? For it to smell like Baratie inside the tiny space, and to find the reason for the smell to be Sanji talking away with Luffy and Usopp while he cooked.Â
âIt smells like heaven in here,â you mused, taking in a deep inhale of all the aromas floating inside the kitchen.Â
Usopp was leaning against the island - in the same exact spot Zoro had been in mere hours ago. His blood still stained part of the wood. You couldnât bring yourself to go near it. So, you made your way around it completely and over to sit with Luffy. Who was currently cleaning the Wado Ichimonji for Zoro just like he said he would.Â
Everywhere you looked Zoroâs presence was a constant reminder. A ghost haunting you that you hadnât signed up for.Â
âIf this is heaven then in walked an Angel.â
Instantly, all your sadness was quickly replaced with irritation - and relief.Â
âItâs a little too early to be flirting, isnât it?â
âNah. Itâs never too early to let a beautiful woman know just how breathtaking she is.âÂ
âUgh, I wouldnât let Zoro hear you talk to Doc like that,â Usopp chuckled nervously. âI think heâd probably implode.âÂ
âIâm sorry. Who?âÂ
Sanji either must have had the worst memory youâd encountered in a while or he was playing dumb for the hell of it. Usopp took a bit of the apple heâd grabbed from the fruit bowl. He held up a finger letting Sanji know he needed to wait while he chewed before he spoke.Â
âGreen-haired guy. Three swords.â
âThe one from this morning?â
âYeah, thatâs the one.â
Sanji cocked his head to the side as if he was questioning if Usopp was telling him a joke and heâd missed the punchline. He was in the middle of folding something in the middle of what looked like dough and you were tempted to interrupt their small discussion about your nonexistent love life to see what it was.Â
âI think Iâll take my chances.â
Sanji smiled warmly at Usopp and sent another eye twitch in your direction.Â
This guy was going to give you trouble.Â
You watched as Luffy softly ran one of Zoroâs clothes over the sheath of the blade. He was taking his time and made sure he didnât miss a single part. He was dedicated to making sure Zoro knew his things were safe here, with all of you, on the Merry. That he was a captain who would do what was necessary for the things you all loved and held valuable.Â
âSo, how did he look, Doc?â
Luffyâs question tore your eyes away from watching him do another round of polishing. He hadnât looked at you yet, but you knew the minute you started talking he would give you his undivided attention.Â
âHeâs doing okay. No real change in vital signs. A slight infection has set in and gave him a fever. I made some medicine to give him every few hours just to make sure itâs nothing major.âÂ
Luffy placed a hand on your shoulder and gave you a light shake. A smile graced his lips as he replied, âThe best doctor in all of the East Blue and soon, the Grand Line!â
You wish you could smile back brighter or maybe with something that looks genuine. Instead, a grimace meant to resemble a smile graced your lips.Â
âI donât know about the best doctor. I had no idea yellowtail skin had so many wonderful properties in them.â
âI donât think any of us did, honestly,â Sanji offered.Â
âIt makes me wonder if Naan even knew about it.â
âWhat? You mean the resident doctor in your village never used the wonder that is yellowtail.â
âI think if you told Naan to go fishing for an ingredient youâd end up fishing your teeth off the floor.âÂ
âOooh,â Sanji chuckled. âIs she really that bad?â
âWorse,â Usopp interjected. âNaan isnât really known for taking new age information or techniques very well.â
âHey,â you interject with a pout.Â
âYou know itâs true. She follows what her mother taught her religiously and makes Doc follow it too. Iâm not saying sheâs not a great doctor justâŠreally old school.â
âI mean, she is old, Usopp,â you deadpanned.Â
âYou know what I meant.âÂ
âYou two seem to know each other pretty well.â
Sanji was keeping himself busy still with scooping batter into a piping bag. You were so tempted to ask him what the hell he was making and how soon would you be able to get any of it. His statement was said with an inviting smile and a look of interest in his eyes as he looked between you and Usopp.Â
âDoc and I go way back. She was literally, like, my only friend in the village we grew up in.â
âThat is not true. You had Kaya. I had you and Naan and that was about it.â
âIâm sure a beautiful woman such as yourself has plenty of friends and admirers.â
God, please make him stop calling you beautiful.Â
âWell, youâre wrong. No one in the village liked me.â
âThey were actually scared of her.â
You loved how casually Usopp could just drop information without a care in the world. He was always like that since you were kids. You figured it must have been part of his ability to weave stories so intricately. Sprinkle truth throughout the lie and no one was sure what part was real and what wasnât. The only problem here? He didnât follow it up with anything else but the truth.Â
âUsopp!â You shot out in a groan.Â
Heâd taken a bit of the apple again so all you got in response was a shoulder shrug.Â
âWhy would villagers be scared of you?âÂ
It wasnât hard to miss the disbelief in Luffyâs voice or the small chuckle that clung to the back of each word.Â
âBecause-âÂ
âBecause she just showed up out of thin air on the island.â Usopp interrupted trying to swallow the remaining apple pieces in his throat. âNo parents. No nothing. They all thought that a Siren or something dropped her off on the shores. All the villagers thought she was a bad omen.â
âOh my god, Usopp! Iâm like right here I can tell it and, by the way, you are the reason why everyone thought I came as a curse from the ocean and that my mom was a Siren!â
âI was trying to help you. It got Johnny Fittsmore to stop cutting pieces of your hair, didnât it!â
âWow. Okay.â Sanji mumbled. âWerenât kidding on the friend's part.â
âWhy was he cutting pieces of your hair?â
You werenât surprised Luffy was confused. He was kind-hearted, and would probably never grasp the concept of people choosing to be mean.Â
âI just showed up on the beach aboard a small lifeboat. Naan said she could hear my cries from her house.â
âCries? As in a baby?âÂ
Sanji stopped all he was doing to rest his hands on the counter. His broad shoulders hunched forward as he looked at you through a small window of hair. He looked visibly upset and the last thing you needed was the new guy to think you were broken.
âI donât know if I was a baby. I just know I was small and Naan decided not to let the birds eat me.âÂ
âNo parents?â
âI mean, does anyone really have parents at this point?â
Usoppâs mom unfortunately passed away while you were both young. Heâd never met his dad, Yasopp, wherever that no good baby daddy of a pirate was and basically had Usopp chasing after shadows in hopes he would ever return. Luffy seemed to only have a crazy stalker grandpa and that left Nami and Zoro with the chance of having actual functioning parental units somewhere.
âThe lucky ones do.â
Sanjiâs reply was delicate, like his smile, as if he said it too loud it would spook you.Â
âI guess that makes us an unlucky bunch of misfits,â you replied.Â
âI think weâre pretty lucky,â Luffy interjected. âWe all found each other.âÂ
You were not going to cry.Â
In the few hours this all happened, you couldnât remember the last time you smiled and meant it. A handful of those times had been with Luffy and, just like the times before, you could feel your own smile curving your lips. A real one.Â
âI could drink to that.â
âFunny you mention a drink,â Sanji began as he placed something in the oven. âBut I think you still owe me one.â
You got up from your seat and made your way over to stand next to the sink. Your eyes watched as Sanji did, in fact, have a bottle waiting in the basket heâd brought back from Baratie.Â
âYou always carry a bottle around with you?â
âOnly when I get the chance to share a drink with a talented woman, such as yourself.âÂ
âDo any of these lines usually work on women?â
A full-throated laugh left him as he grabbed two glasses and began to pour the drinks. You would never say it out loud, not even if someone threatened to cut a limb off, but you enjoyed Sanjiâs company. He didnât take himself too seriously, except for his cooking.Â
He let you tease him and took everything you served in stride. AlthoughâŠyou did miss the way Zoro always seemed to have something equally sharp to send back your way. Sanji just liked being in the company of others, especially if that company happened to be the opposite sex.Â
âSometimes,â he answered honestly. âItâs usually my charm and not my words that do it.â
âI can see that.â
He was charming. He was handsome. There wasnât a point in denying facts just because your cup of tea was currently brewing on life support in the back. Sanji handed you your glass and lifted his up in a toast.Â
âTo the first drink and, hopefully, to many more.âÂ
You moved your glass to meet his and a light clink filled the space between you. You brought the glass to your lips and swallowed the liquid in a few gulps. As you set your glass back on the island you could hear a soft chuckle from Usopp coming from behind you. When you turned to look at him he was grinning from ear to ear.Â
âWhat?â
âZoro is going to be so pissed when he gets up.âÂ
You were about to tell him to shut up and remind him you were both very much single and in no way romantically involved. Even if you might have wanted that to happen, Zoro made it clear it wasnât what he wanted.Â
You started to open your mouth when Nami came crashing in through the galleyâs doors.Â
âLuffy! Luffy! The Arlong Pirates are at Baratie. We have to leave now.â
âWhat? Why? Why should we leave?â
âBecause they are looking for you!â
âJust fucking great,â you sighed as you grabbed the bottle Sanji had left on the table.
Her last words were directed at Luffy. Of course, someone was here for Luffy. When wasnât someone here for him? Stalker grandpa. Stalker grandpaâs war dog. Now another pirate who may or may not be working with stalker Grandpa.Â
âMe?â
Luffy seemed as surprised as the rest of you. A finger pointing at himself just to make sure we were all physically sure it was, in fact, him.
âAnd the map. Those fishmen will tear this place apart if Zeff doesnât turn him over.â
In a flash, all the joking and light conversation disappeared. One minute Sanji was beside you and then he was bounding around the island to get to his coat.Â
âWhere are you going?â
âIf Baratieâs in danger, I need to be there.â
You knew what was going to happen before Luffy even spoke. The goodness that was the core of who Luffy was would never abandon people to possible pain and suffering. It wasnât in whatever strange and stretchy DNA that made up who he was. It was why youâd joined him and why you would continue to be aboard this ship until he no longer wanted you there.Â
âAlright, Iâm coming with you.âÂ
âDid you not hear what I just said? They are hunting you. We need to run.â
âIâm with Nami on this one. Iâm really not trying to ruffle any feathers or scales.â
âUsopp. There are innocent people inside that place.
âHow do you know that, Doc? Itâs a restaurant that serves pirates!â
âUsopp - we,â you indicated between the two of you, âare pirates.âÂ
âOh, yeah. Thatâs a solid point, but still-â
âIâm not running,â Luffy cut in. âWeâre going to protect this place.â
âThis isnât your fight. Why would you do that?â
You could feel yourself waiting for the answer - for Sanji to experience the man that was Monkey D. Luffy. With a kind smile, he simply replied, âYou fed us.â
Kindness for a kindness.Â
âLook, I know this crew. Their captain, Arlong, has the highest bounty in all of the East Blue. You do not want to mess with him.â
âIt sounds like he messed with us first.â
âLuffy, please. Please.â
âNami. What are you so afraid of?â
You werenât sure what possessed you to say it or why you moved towards her. It didnât matter if she tried to deny it or cover it up with anger this time. Youâd seen her and the fear that rolled off her like a sickness appeared to cripple her.Â
âWhat do I have to be afraid of? You are all going to rush in there and get yourselves killed!â
âNami,â Luffy said, âI canât let innocent people get hurt because of me. If those fishmen guys want a fight, weâre gonna give them one.â He looked between Nami and you and walked over to her. A solid hand cupping her shoulder. âYou two stay back with the ship and protect the map. Hmm.â
âFuck that!âÂ
You stepped forward to the other side of him forcing him to turn from Nami to face you.Â
âIâm going with you.â
âDoc, itâs safer-â
âI donât care. Youâre down a man right now and, no offense Usopp, he isnât the greatest choice for backup.â
âHey! Iâm taking all the offense!â
âTake it all I donât care. Luffy, I may not be a three-sword-wielding badass but I can help you. Let me help you. Please.â
Luffy regarded you for one long moment before he slowly nodded.Â
âYou canât be serious?â
Nami regarded you like youâd gone insane. Maybe you had. You werenât a soldier. You didnât know much about fighting besides when you punched Isaki Quade in the nose in the lemon grove.Â
âIâm going with him, Nami.â
âItâs going to be alright, Nami,â Luffy interjected. âThe ship and the map will be safe with you.â
With that, Luffy turns on his heel and heads for the door. As you walked past the island you reached up and removed a pot from the upper rack. If Zoro could see you now, you could already hear what he would say in your head.Â
Seriously? Youâre bringing the pot with you?Â
âWhatâs with the pot?â Sanji asked.Â
You twirled it around in your hand as you both tried to keep pace with Luffyâs quick steps.Â
âItâs my weapon of choice.â
Sanji still looked confused but you didnât have time to explain. Luffy was already up and over the side of the Merry and walking towards the deck. If you didnât catch up fast he would be inside Baratie before you even made it to the door.Â
âThis is a bad idea. Such a bad idea.â
You knew Usopp was trying to whisper it to himself. Heâd always been one to talk his thoughts out when he wasnât even trying. You tried to soothe him as you passed through the door into Baratie with a pat on his back, and instead, he nearly became one with the ceiling.Â
âWe are going to be okay, Usopp.â
âYou shouldnât even be here, Doc,â he snapped back. âYou are the ship's doctor. What happens if we get injured and so do you?â
âThe good news is in that scenario Iâm just injured - not dead. So, I can still patch you guys up.â
âThat doesnât make me feel the least bit better.â
If the mood wasnât so serious you wouldâve laughed. The moment felt like you were back in Syrup village with Usopp rambling on and on about if he should or shouldnât tell Kaya he was in love with her. No matter what you told him, his head would still worry. It was his nature.Â
Everything froze in time, however, when Luffy pushed open the double doors and stepped inside the eerily quiet dining room.Â
âWho here is Arlong?â
That was one way to make an entrance.Â
âThat would be me.â
A deep voice boomed from below you and when you looked over the railing, immediately you wished youâd stayed on the ship. He was holding an older man by the collar, sharp teeth exposed at his throat. You suddenly wished Zoro was here.Â
âMy name is Monkey D. Luffy and I hear you're looking for me.â
âWhy, yes I am.â
You had to hand it to Luffy. Arlong looked terrifying to look at and overly confident. Luffy didnât seem the least bit phased by any of it as he led you all down the stairs.Â
âSo, this is the pirate Iâve heard so much about? You know? I was expecting someoneâŠbigger.â
âSo was I.âÂ
If you werenât so fucking terrified you wouldâve laughed. At least Luffy was able to smile for the both of you, because the minute eyes darker than the trenches of the ocean peered up at all of you ready to rip out your throats you swear you felt your soul exit stage left.Â
âDo you know who I am, boy? Iâm Arlong the Saw. Even the Marines flee before my flag.â
âNot ringing a bell. Howâs you find me anyway?â
A sickening chuckle that reminded you of gills taking in water filled the room.Â
âAn old friend helped me track you down.âÂ
He clicked his tongue right after he finished, and you hated the fact that you jumped. You hated it even more when Sanji moved to stand just a little in front of you to protect you.Â
In all of a second, the dirty blonde-haired fishmen reached into a black bag and took out a-Â
âIs that a fucking clown head?!âÂ
You wanted to scream but swallowed it down as it started talking and- oh god moving. The neck area actually wiggled as he shouted, âHeya, Straw Hat. Did you miss me?â
âBurpy? What are you doing here?â
âBelieve me, it wasnât my first choice either. But these fine fishy folk persuaded me to point them in the right direction, which ainât easy when you donât have any hands.âÂ
He let out a laugh like this was like any other day. All completely normal.Â
âHowâd you even know how to find me?â
âI told you. Iâve got eyes and ears everywhere.â
To prove his point, you watched in horror as an ear fluttered its way out of Luffyâs hat and back to attach itself to Burpyâs head.Â
âWhat is happening right now?âÂ
Your whisper was aggressive and you werenât even sure why you were even asking Usopp or Sanji like they even knew. It just made you feel a bit better when all three of you looked at each other equally disturbed.Â
Luffy, as usual, looked less shocked about the ear in his hat and more that heâd been listening.Â
âYou were listening all along? You heard everything?â
âEverything. And that got old quick, âcause you shidiots have no idea what you are doing. By the way, Doc, it's so nice to finally meet you. Youâre equally as delicious as Dreamsicle. Wherever she is. Hey, Lips!â
Burpy turned to yell at the fishmen who did have rather large lips to scratch his ear. You were still stuck on the fact a clown head was trying to hit on you.Â
Maybe you shouldâve just stayed with Nami on the boat.Â
The fishmen denied him his apparent scratch and Burpy went into full shriek mode. You instantly winced at the sound and tried not to cover your ears as his head was shoved back inside the black bag.Â
âListen here. I want my map and half of whatever you plunder as tribute. And if you bow down to me, I might even let you serve in my kingdom.â
Arlong was walking slowly towards you - towards Luffy. You werenât sure if while he talked he was smiling or snarling.Â
âI donât bow down to any man.â
âIâm no man.â
âOr fish,â Luffy corrected. âYouâre no king.â
âI will be when I get my Grand Line map.â
âThenâŠâ Luffy placed his hat back on his head and you already knew what was coming. âYouâre going to have to fight me for it.â
Shit.Â
Suddenly, coming in with a fucking cooking pot felt ridiculous, but you were gripping it tightly all the same.Â
âThen let the fighting begin.âÂ
Right as Arlong smacked his fist into his hand, the sound of a gunshot went off and your eyes traveled up to see a rather large Chefâs hat in the middle of the room. Attached to that hat was Zeff who held a small muscat in his hand.Â
The other fishman who sat at the table with Blondie immediately got up and kicked the wood of Zeffâs wooden leg. It broke without pause and sent the older man tumbling to the floor. When he looked up, the Fishman kicked him hard and sent him flying back through three tables.Â
âZeff!â
Sanjiâs voice was filled with so much pain your chest aches but it was also thundering to life with adrenaline. How the fuck did you think a pot was going to help at all against them? You could hear Zoro chastising you, calling you a dumbass and you swiftly pushed it away. Now was not the time to talk to imaginary Zoro.Â
Sanji ran down the stairs and kicked Blondie away and used the momentum to land on their table. He spun off and kicked the Fishman whoâd hurt Zeff.Â
âUsopp!â
He ran past you and shrank down small to get under the table. No one else saw him do it. They were too busy watching Sanji as he took on the fishman.Â
âUsopp, get bac-â
You moved down the stairs to get him and were greeted with Sanjiâs body landing on the exact table. It tipped over instantly and exposed Usopp underneath. He immediately clamored out from underneath it.Â
âGet the people out of here! Get them out now!âÂ
You rushed down what was left of the stairs as Luffy started shouting out his gum-gum pistol. You could hear his body stretching impossibly far back, but you were busy trying to get to Sanji. He was choking on the air trapped in his lungs and your body was seized in terror that he may have a punctured lung.Â
âSanji,â you asked, placing a hand on his face to bring him to focus on your face and the other gently on his side. âAre you alright? Does anything feel broken?â
âJustâŠmy pride,â he wheezed back.Â
You ignored the fact heâd placed his hand over yours and lightly began to move him towards Usopp who was now on the other stairs. You looked back and saw Arlong toss Luffy violently against the pillar.Â
âGet up!â
âLuffy!â
You tried to move down off the stairs and felt Sanji grip you tightly around your waist to keep you there with him and Usopp. He kept throwing punch after punch and Arlong took them all with stride. Luffy wasnât making a dent and to Arlong this was just a game.Â
Luffy tried to swing on him one last time and Arlong caught it. He tried to swing again to make Arlong let him go, and he easily caught that one. With both fists in his hands, he used them to pull Luffy to him.Â
You tried to wiggle free but Sanji held on tight and the feeling of Usoppâs hand on your shoulder joined in. Luffy looked so scared; so angry as Arlong told him something through sharpened teeth. One minute they were there and the next Arlong flung him up into the foray.Â
âLuffy!â
This time you did scream as Arlong took the stairs to reach him. The continued sounds of a body being thrown through stained glass windows.Â
âDoc, I know you want to go to him but you canât! It isnât safe.â
âFuck that I canât just let him die!â
You were nearing hysterics. Why couldnât they remember that Luffy was a Devil Fruit eater? That outside was miles and miles of ocean and Arlong knew it. All it would take is one splash, and one toss, and Luffy would be defenseless. All it would take is him falling over the dock and he would drown.Â
âHe isnât going to die!â
âUsopp, he ate a Devil fruit! Mother Ocean turns her back on those who do and what is outside with them?âÂ
You needed them to understand that it wasnât because you wanted to be a hero. You werenât that kind of person. You just wanted to save the life of your Captain.Â
You refused to lose two people on the same day.Â
âOh, shit,â Usopp mumbled and you felt your head shaking along with it.Â
âYes! Shit. I need to make sure heâs okay. Please.âÂ
Sanji looked from Usopp and back to you. Blue eyes desperately searching your face to come up with a reason to tell you no. Finally, he released the hold he kept on your waist and nodded up the stairs.Â
âGo check on our Captain.âÂ
You mouthed the words thank you as you bolted up the stairs. You took them two at a time and rounded the broken foray doors to see the sunlight coming from outside. That door too had been completely smashed open with Luffyâs body.Â
The adrenaline in your veins screamed at you to move faster; be quicker. Your feet thundering onto the dock just in time to see Arlong holding Luffy up over the edge of the dock andâŠwas that Nami?
âNami!â You called out to her. âWhat are you doing?â
âDoc! Stay back!âÂ
Each word that left Luffy came out choked and ragged. His hands weakly clamored at the grip Arlong had on his throat. Your eyes didnât know where to look. Luffy who was in danger or Nami whoâŠhad a suspicious-looking tattoo that looked like Arlong in tattoo form and the Grand Line map in hand.Â
âWhat is going on?â
âA business transaction, girl,â Arlong chuckled. âDonât be a pest and interrupt.âÂ
âI wasnât talking to you, asshole,â you snapped. You shouldâve cared when the smile left his face. When he looked like he would throw you into the ocean along with Luffy. âNami. I asked you a question.âÂ
She turned on you then. Her whole body facing you as she gave you a shrug and a look so icy it couldâve frozen hell slid across her face. For all her show of hatred, however, she couldnât hollow out the heartbreak in her eyes. Nami didnât want you to hate her but she would make you, and you wanted to know why.Â
âWhat is it that you arenât comprehending, Doc? I was sent to steal the map and bring it back to him. Iâve been a part of Arlongâs crew this whole time. I played you.âÂ
You didnât believe her for one second. Your friendship isn't something that could be faked. The way she cared and pleaded with Zoro to not fight Mihawk. Sheâd even pleaded with Luffy to run while Arlong was here and maybeâŠmaybe itâs because she was running too.Â
âI donât believe you-â
âBelieve whatever you want. Itâs not going to make a difference or make any of this less real,â she snapped.Â
She dismissed you by completely turning away from you and headed towards a Jolly Roger that held the same emblem as her tattoo. Arlong went to bite at Luffyâs neck and Nami called to him.Â
âWhy waste your time killing a Devil Fruit eater when the sea can do it for you.âÂ
No! âNo!âÂ
This time when the fear threatens to freeze you in place and to keep you from making that critical step forward, you don't hesitate to burst into a full sprint. Your words leave you in a rush.Â
âIâm a doctor! Do you hear me Arlong!? Iâm a doctor.â
âDoc, no-âÂ
âWhat good is a human doctor to me?â Arlong snarled in response.Â
You could hear the sound of his fingers releasing Luffy. The sound of his body edging closer to the lip of the ocean.Â
âColumnaria! Fish rot. I can cure it.â
That caused him to pause - for everyone to pause.Â
âHow? Youâre a human.â
âWe had fishmen who served one of the wealthy businessmen where I lived. They would get sick and Naan- the healer would have to treat them. She taught me how.â
Cautiously you moved towards him with your hands up. If he did decide to not take you up on your offer and drop Luffy into the ocean you wanted to be close enough to jump in.Â
âI can treat any of your fishmen who are sick with it. I can teach you how to care for it yourself. But if you drop him into the ocean youâll get nothing.âÂ
It was easy to see how much Arlong hated that you knew how to cure a disease that killed fishmen like wildfire. A human. You bargained his menâs life for the life of your Captain and that seemed fair.Â
âDonât do this, Doc.âÂ
âIâm sorry, Luffy. I have to.â
You couldnât shake the feeling that youâd failed Zoro somehow. You wouldnât fail Luffy too.Â
Arlong took all of a second to consider your offer. He showed you he accepted it by dropping a very weak Luffy back onto the safety of the dock.Â
âI accept your bargain, human. Welcome to the Arlong Pirates.â
_________
As always, thank you so much for reading. Comments and reblogs are always welcome.
_________
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#Chaos in Their Bones#ongoing series#one piece#opla#one piece live action#roronoa zoro#roronoa zoro x reader#roronoa zoro x you#opla zoro x reader#opla zoro x you#one piece x reader#one piece zoro#op zoro#opla fanfiction#one piece fanfiction#frenemies to lovers#idiots to lovers#slow burn#friends to lovers#mutual pining#reader is referred to as Doc
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Sometimes a saviour is a soldier afraid of peace
Levi Ackerman x Fem!Reader
4.4k words. Also on ao3.
He looks at her in quiet admiration.
He doesnât deserve her. But again, he doesnât really deserve anything. He already has gotten too much: spoiled by the sweet possibility of life when all his comrades have fallen, their bodies twisted, mangled by titans and enemies alike.
Levi hardly cries, but he wants to cry in that moment. She turns on the stove for him, and rummages through his cabinets. She finds two cups and a sob is trapped inside his throat.
He doesnât fucking understand why she stays, why she puts up with his sorry ass but, damn it. Damn it if he at least doesnât try.
The war is over, but the demons still haunt Levi. Luckily for him, the last member of his Squad seems focused on remaining by his side as they both face this new enemy: peace.
This was !!! My first fic written in English, actually. Also my first (and only time so far) writing for aot. Levi is such an angsty angel, and this story wouldnât leave my head, so I had to end up writing it, ofc. This has been in the drafts for... months. Too many months already. And tbh I'm not a fan of how it came out. But. Posting it in case someone else can enjoy Levi finally getting some love and comfort, sjsjs.
Content: Use of 3rd person pronouns. No use of y/n. Mostly Levi's pov. Reader was part of his Squad. Post!Rumbling Levi. Written with the manga ending in mind. A lot of fluff, rude Levi even if he doesn't mean it (but reader knows he means no harm). Healing. Spooning (Levi as the little spoon btw. He deserves it).
Warnings: depressive thoughts, self confidence issues. Mentions of past violence (but nothing gruesome, it's all in passing). SFW. No beta reader we die like everybody in Aot here.
They always meet. Every single day, she leaves her little flat to find him near the fountain in the Marleyan park, eager to push his wheelchair and pass some time with him.
Levi doesnât understand. When Onyankopon, or Falco, or Gabi let her take the wheelchair, he just ponders. He could understand why they would accompany him: because he is old? because they feel pity of him?⊠But her?
Nonetheless, every single afternoon, she comes to him. He doesnât recall when this custom began. Itâs like slowly, but surely, she started digging a place into his routine. She was part of his remaining squad, and he really didnât see any point to her bubbling-self still being by his side.
Still, he appreciates her visits. She exchanges pleasantries with Gabi, already smiling. Why is she smiling?
âHi, Captain,â she says. Should he feel mocked? He isnât a captain anymore and the title feels too much, even if itâs comforting in some way. Levi doesnât reply. He just nods, silently acknowledging her presence. âIs it okay if we go to the stalls for a while, Captain?â She inquires, as if it was the first time they did it, and not a weekly occurrence. His jaw tenses. He doesnât understand, still. She surely pities him. She has to.
He agrees to her proposal, though.
âSure,â he replies, barely any emotion on his face.
She smiles at him. For a moment, they look at each other. She sees that familiar scarred face, a grey eye gazing into her soul. He sees the older face of her remaining squad member, some wrinkles next to her eyes, her figure dressed in green. For some reason, he liked that colour on her.
He doesnât share that with her, though.
âLetâs get going,â she adds, a little chuckle in her voice â he can hear it â as she starts pushing the wheelchair. They check out the little shops that are already so familiar. Sometimes she signals a piece of jewellery or clothes. She asks for his opinion, or points at a silly artwork, in hopes of making him laugh.
When the cold starts to set in, she stops them in front of a coffee shop.
âWait here a second, Captain,â she tells him.
âWhere would I go, anyway?â He wants to say, snarky, but he doesnât really bother in opening his mouth. He stays silent still, perking his head up to see whatâs sheâs doing.
âOi. coffee?â He complains.
She directs her gaze to him and chuckles, paying the vendor.
âI know you like tea but itâs time to broaden your horizons,â she explains. She comes up to him again, and hands him one of the cups. He sighs, but accepts the drink still.
âWhat is it this time?â
âJust chocolate. Hot chocolate,â she answers, already sipping hers. She lets out a content sigh when the warmth of it starts to fill her belly.
âI donât like chocolate,â Levi mutters under his breath. He is lying and she knows it.
âTsk. Thatâs not true. Everybody likes chocolate.â
â⊠Fine,â he sips his drink and, admittedly, enjoys it. She hands him her drink so she can push the wheelchair again, and he takes it, guarding both cups on his lap, a familiar action for the two of them now.
âWhere do we go?â She asks.
Levi shrugs. âAs if I had a choice.â
She looks at him still, and when he can see her, barely from his peripheral vision, he sees a softer face. Sheâs waiting for his reply. He looks at her, looks at her lips. She isnât smiling anymore. Levi sighs, suddenly feeling guilty.
He doesnât understand still why she does this for him.
âCaptain?â She says, just above a whisper, since there are people around them and they both just want to have a calm evening, without the risk of being recognised.
Levi nods before he even opens his mouth.
âThe bridge.â
âGood,â she agrees as he sips from his drink again, guided by her. He does feel warmer. Levi inspects the people around him in silence, letting himself be carried, taken to a nicer place. âHange would have like this,â he thinks. He looks down to suddenly realise he is clenching his fist, hard. âIf you could even call it a handâŠâ
âWeâre here, Captain,â she announces, letting his wheelchair rest next to a bench, overlooking the water. She takes a seat next to him, and Levi hands her the drink. He wonders if she noticed how tense heâs been feeling today.
âBe quick with that, brat, or it will get cold,â he warns, as if to pre-emptively shut down any words from her. Heâs not sure he could handle it.
She just nods.
âItâs still warm,â she mentions after a moment.
The sunset is taking its place on the sky, a beautiful palette of oranges and pinks against a very flat horizon. A reminder of what was once lost.
âGood,â he says.
Levi looks at her. She is still looking forward, features illuminated by the falling sun, breeze caressing her face. There is something in his heart that aches, but he doesnât want to think about that. He doesnât dare to. Levi is old, too old, and too broken. And she only pities him.
He coughs to catch her attention, though.
âHmh, yeah?â She immediately says.
âI heard the Scouts were going back to Paradis tomorrow,â he begins, the question lingering in the air. The small group was leaving first time in the morning.
âYep.â
Levi blinks, expecting her to say more, but she doesnât. He doesnât want to ask. It feels⊠too much. He feels too exposed doing that, lower lip trembling.
âAre you going?â He finally dares to ask.
She turns back to him again, and looks at him with the sweetest gaze. Levi doesnât miss how she looks at his lips first.
âIâm not.â
âWhy?â
âI donât have anything there,â she replies, matter-of-factly. Levi wants to hit his head against something, still uncertain about what that means. Does that mean that she has something here? Someone?
She must notice his doubts, so she lowers her gaze. âI mean. You know I lost my family during my first years as a Scout. And knowing that we tried to stop Eren⊠All the military forces in the island wonât be very happy to see me. Or any of us. Iâve done my part. I do not want more fighting.â
â⊠Rightâ. That still doesnât answer his question, but it is enough to satisfy his curiosity without seeming to eager. He sips his drink again: itâs getting colder.
âYou didnât want to go, Captain?â There it was again, that fucking title that felt like a joke. He chuckles, not looking at her anymore but rather at the sunset.
âWhy do you still call me like that?â He spits back.
âCaptain?â
âYeah,â His tone is unintentionally rude, but he canât help it, not even around her.
âWell⊠Itâs a sign of respect, donât you think?â
Levi chuckles, amused.
âI never took you for a polite person.â He doesnât want to look at her still. She hasnât added anything, said anything else. What is she thinking of?
She looks at him. Thereâs a warmth in her belly which has nothing to do with the chocolate anymore. She knows: Her Captain has been way more vulnerable and open since the Rumbling. The little gestures that he could so easily hide before are now an open book. Or at least she feels that way, since she was always one to look at him.
It was so easy to just⊠stare at him. Admire him in every sense of the word, even now. When they were both soldiers they would fight alongside each other, against innumerable dangers. He was barely visible in the spectrum: always so fast, always so precise. A ray of dark hair and strong limbs, destroying everything to provide peace, to provide protection.
There was no point in denying how she felt about him⊠Except, maybe, to him.
âI donât think I would like going back to Paradis,â she finally adds, finishing her drink. He seems to reflect on that idea for a moment, before nodding. He wants to ask why but he doesnât dare to. âIâm just⊠comfortable here,â she finishes with a sigh. âThis is okay.â
âThatâs good,â he says, barely a spark of enthusiasm in his voice, but enough for her to notice.
She looks up at him again. And he feels tiny and scared suddenly, because she looks at him with wonder and care. Levi doesnât mean to, but he ends up letting his drink fall from his hands, whether due to his nervousness or the state of his hand after the war.
âShit,â he spits, upset.
âSh, itâs alright, Captain.â In a second she is picking up the cup, handing him a handkerchief to dry his hands. She walks a few steps to throw both cups into a trashcan and is again, by his side. Such a quick interaction so as to ease his shame, he could notice it. âAre you alright?â
Levi still doesnât know. He doesnât know why she still treats him with such respect, why she seems to care so much for him. But he wants to find out, somehow. He barely nods, but she notices it.
âGood,â she says, while taking the handkerchief back. She is about to put it into her bag again when she feels a hand grabbing hers.
Levi.
He doesnât even say anything. He doesnât know how. She seems to understand, though, squeezing his hand, softly. Levi quickly lets her hand go, his cheeks going red. She gets behind the wheelchair again, as the sun is about to disappear, and Levi can hear her chuckling.
âLetâs get you home, Captain.â
He stays quiet, unsure if he could even say something useful.
Thereâs so much he doesnât know how to say. How to do.
While she is pushing his chair he notices it again. A slight tremor in her right hand. âMy wrist seems to ache lately⊠Must be from holding the blades for so many years,â she had explained in passing a couple weeks ago. He realises that itâs probably taking a strain on her to push him every fucking day.
âOi,â he says.
âYeah?â
âStop pushing me. I can handle it,â he explains, tone serious.
âOh, no,â her hand is trembling still. âItâs fine, itâs no bother for me, Captain.â
â⊠Itâs an order,â he commands after a moment. She stops in her tracks and he can hear a gentle laugh coming from behind him.
âIt had been a while since that, huh.â Confidently, she places one of her hands on his shoulder, gently tapping it. Levi smiles. Barely curving his lips, but he does. He is about to be brave, hold her hand on his shoulder when she removes it from him. âShit,â he thinks. âToo slow⊠Too slow? Slow for what? Tsk.â
Despite his missing fingers, he can still push his wheelchair quite properly. It also helps that he can see his street far ahead. She walks comfortably besides him, a silence and gentle ghost as his most devoted companion.
Yeah. Thereâs definitely something aching in his chest. He had been noticing the past days, feeling getting more painful as they both approach his place. And it has nothing to do with his faulty joints or damaged body or excessive age.
When they reach his door, she asks for his key. Levi gives it to her, his hand lingering for a second too long, reflecting on the brief touch of hands as she grabs it to unlock the door.
He is tired.
And he feels incredibly silly when he realises he doesnât want her to leave.
âThere we go, Captain. I help you in?â she suggests with a bright smile, opening the door.
â⊠Yes.â
She steps inside and pushes the chair into his living room, almost getting it next to his couch.
âThatâs enoughâ he decides, in a semblance of independency he still wants to maintain.
She nods. âOkay⊠I guess⊠Iâll get going, Captain.â
Levi lifts up his gaze. He wants to ask⊠He wants to know⊠He savours her image for a moment, her tired expression and the way her dress now looks clumsy and wrinkled but he doesnât care. Before, before everything had ended up like this he would remind every single cadet to iron their uniforms, all the outfits presentable, so as to look like respectable soldiers and honourable bodies if the occasion arose. Now she can have the privilege of looking messy. Of not worrying about death so often.
âNo,â he mutters.
âHuh?â she inquires, taking a step forward.
âShit,â Levi thinks. âI⊠I want tea,â he makes up a quick lie.
âOh, sure. Yes, Captain.â She leaves her bag on the couch and goes into the kitchen, getting a kettle full of water.
He looks at her in quiet admiration.
He doesnât deserve her. But again, he doesnât really deserve anything. He already has gotten too much: spoiled by the sweet possibility of life when all his comrades have fallen, their bodies twisted, mangled by titans and enemies alike.
Levi hardly cries, but he wants to cry in that moment. She turns on the stove for him, and rummages through his cabinets. She finds two cups and a sob is trapped inside his throat.
He doesnât fucking understand why she stays, why she puts up with his sorry ass but, damn it. Damn it if he at least doesnât try.
He stands up. His body still holds that ability, though his legs get tired rather quickly. He can still walk, so he does until he reaches the kitchen. She is still deciding on the teas when she sees him.
âOh, no, Captain, please, just donâtâŠâ
He interrupts her, grabs her waist carelessly and pushes her towards the couch, barely moving her.
âLet me handle it myself.â
âLeviâŠâ She whispers, their faces inches apart.
âGo. Sit,â he mumbles, biting his lips and sending his eyes lower, so as to avoid her face.
âAre you sure?â She inquires a moment after, still close to him. He notices she has a hand on his waist as well, a protective aid making sure he stays on two feet.
âYes,â he says, more commanding this time. He grabs that hand of hers and pushes her away gently now.
She nods, understandingly.
âIâll be in the living room,â she adds.
Levi nods at her, making sure she finally gets that ass of hers in the couch. He is now faced with his kitchen. Most of the cups and teas, everything has been moved lower, so as to accommodate to his wheelchair. Slowly, he kneels, searching for a specific flavour for her. When he finally finds the peppermint and rose one, he mentally cheers. He stands up again, slowly, as if to show confidence, making sure from his peripheral view that she isnât coming to his aid.
She isnât. He catches her averting her eyes, though. A confirmation that she has been staring.
He decides to stare as well. Supporting himself on his weakened legs, he waits for the kettle to boil, while looking at her. Itâs as if she could notice that, because her head doesnât move, still fixated on an indescriptible point in his living room.
âOi, what you looking at?â He says, a bit more light-hearted.
A smile forms on her lips before she even turns her head towards him. She doesnât answer. Just keeps smiling at him.
âFuck,â he thinks when he realises he has also slightly curved his lips.
Quickly he turns towards the stove, the kettle already boiling. Levi carefully fills the cups with water, letting the leaves rest. He lifts his gaze up to her for a second but it is already enough for her to notice.
âNeed help with the cups?â Her, always so worried, so in tune with his needs. No need for words.
âOf fucking course.â
Still, the only answer he gives her is a polite nod. She stands up, approaching him.
âIâll handle it, Captain. Just take a seat.â
He lets out a sigh, taking himself to the couch and plopping himself there.
âItâs hard,â Levi thinks as he sees her come back to the living room, two cups in her hands. He accepts the drink, his gaze not leaving her features. âI⊠I canât.â
He knows he canât accept kindness: he doesnât know how to. Still, he tenses his jaw and forces himself to sip the tea as she takes a seat next to him.
âPeppermint, huh?â She hums mostly to herself.
 â⊠Yeah,â comes out of his mouth, unsure, less braver than expected. Is he insecure? Has he made a mistake?
âGood choiceâ She declares and he breathes again, realising that he had been holding his breath. âBet you already knew that, right?â She adds, cocking her head.
Levi looks at her again. He has been avoiding her eyes but he hadnât been trained as a soldier to back down in times of peace.
âI did,â he says, his tone firm, a very weak attempt at showing confidence still. âItâs the one you would always ask for when we would have meetings with the Scouts.â
âItâs good tea.â Her tone seems softer now.
Levi hums, too deep inside his mind to notice it.
She wonders. Wonders if he has ever realized that the only reason she would wander through the headquarters late at night was just to be found and reprimanded by him, the way she would be easily entertained by Leviâs stern face. Wondered if Hange had ever told him about the time she had fallen asleep in their office and woke up, mumbling his name, much to Hangeâs delight, though they had promised to keep it a secret.
He looks down at his legs, at his carpeted floor.
He wonders if she had ever noticed the way he would mindlessly lick his lips after looking at her, the boring uniform suddenly a beautiful outfit, making her stand out. Wonders if it was too late to tell her that, yes, after Hange and her had found him, and stitched him up, that he had heard every single word she had uttered near his heart, softly pressing her timid hands on his chest. There hadnât been time then to discuss anything or even think if it had meant anything else than old scouts being protective of each other, but nowâŠ
They finish their teas in silence. It isnât uncomfortable, rather the opposite, despite the fact that Levi has started nervously tapping his feet against the floor. It is dark outside already, the light from the lamps flowing into Leviâs house, a dog barking a few blocks away.
She stands up, makes sure to wash her cup in the sink and put it away before returning to him.
âCaptain?â She mutters. No need for more words.
Levi hands her the cup with slow movements, as if trying to prolong that insignificant action for as long as possible. And when she is already about to head into the kitchen, little plate and teacup in her hand, he decides to be brave. No more lying to himself, no more being a coward. Too many people have died, have bleed, have sacrificed the little they had for a selected group of survivors to be able to live. To enjoy the remaining Earth. For the little ones that survived to be able to find some meaning. Something worth all the pain.
Basking in the fear serves no one. In fact, makes all the death meaningless.
So, Levi looks up at her and grabs her hand, even if he is scared still. Trembling fingers dancing on hers until they secure her hand softly in his. He feels warm even if he doesnât know what to say, how to convey what he feels. Such a shadow of the man he was. So stupid now.
Levi just wants her to say.
She gasps at the contact but quickly composes herself. A shy smile showing up on her face. They stay like that for a moment, neither daring to break the silence.
âLevi?â She asks after a moment, moving closer to his face, as if asking for permission.
He can only look at her lips in reply.
She shortens the distance between them and kisses him on his lips. It isnât a big kiss, too flashy or provocative: just a tender contact between two broken people. As soon as he has processed what was going on, she has already moved forward, pressing a kiss on the tip of his nose.
And then, even higher, another kiss on his forehead, her lips remaining close to his face. Levi canât say anything. Barely reacting. But when she looks at his eyes, she is greeted by the sweet glimmer of tears in them.
Levi. Happy, at last.
And as if reading his mind, she utters: âDo you want me to stay, Levi?â
âYes. Yes, I do.â
She complies. In the quiet, late hours of the night, Levi wakes up, his body feeling too rested already. It was a habit hard to break, he wouldnât sleep much anyway. He sighs still, feeling her body pressing against his, holding him from behind. She has one hand on his shoulder, the other keeping him safe and secured, hugging his waist close. He dares to smile and grab that hand across his belly with both of his hands, so as to make sure that it is real: he is being held. There is someone else with him. Levi isnât alone. Someone is taking care of him. Someone heâs been devoted to for so many years.
He wants to nuzzle up closer, hide in her chest or neck and feel more.
But he doesnât dare to. He canât allow himself to do that yet.Â
So he stays awake in silence, hearing the soothing and steady rhythm of her heartbeat.
Levi still doesnât understand, though.
He doesnât want to think of why she has chosen him, how he got this privilege so late in his life, when all hope seems to be lost and the thought of a partner didnât cross his mind at all. He also doesnât know what to do with this gift, this blessing. Why? How? He is such a crippled shadow of what he used to be. Slow, so consumed by roughness and violence and so useless now.
He has always had something to fight for: his life, his friends, his Squad, Erwin, Hange. Yet since the Rumbling he has just⊠fallen behind. He is just existing and it seems like his body has finally caught up to his age: no longer agile and strong, but a weakened man, finally leaving the survival mode that has characterised every single aspect of his life. He doesnât have any goals or dreams now. Everything had been slowly trampled down like the titans destroying all land and all life.
He shivers, remembering that day and holds her hand tighter.
Once he had completed the promise made to Erwin, his last order, he had nothing more. No more commands. No more slaying titans.
Just existing.
He doesnât want that. He has been a fighter, a rebel, a monster his whole life. He only knew of endurance and compliance with the spirit of life, of resistance. He doesnât know of anything else: the calmness, the quietness, the routine walks and just reading books and sitting on his porch⊠That is not him. That isnât life. Being able to choose things for himself, devour life gently and enjoy it instead of painfully trying to keep it close, to grip it between calloused fingers⊠Peace isnât familiar.
He has nothing to devote himself to, nothing to prove or fight for.
âYeah,â he thinks. âEverything is⊠meaningless⊠Or it was.â
He closes his eyes, relinquishing himself in the warm body against his.
Some things⊠Some things have meaning still.
Her.
The way she would scrunch her nose when laughing or buy him drinks or attempt to make him laugh or wear that damn stupid wrinkled dress and â âFuck. I know her so much by nowâŠâ
She had been a Scout too. She had fought and devoted her heart and did everything a Scout had to do. She had fulfilled her duty in the same way he did. She has survived and she doesnât regret a single thing. Not even this life.
She is at peace.
He wants to sob.
He doesnât understand peace. Sure, it was his goal, what he always dreamed of, but, damn it. Levi had never thought he would actually get to see something resembling it. Unlike her. She understood what it was: she has accepted peace with open arms and a smile that â fuck, somehowâ has been shining on her face throughout the years. Despite so much pain and deathâŠÂ She still allows herself to fucking live in peace. She forgave herself for the death, for the pain and crimes and let go.
He isnât sure if he can do the same.
Peace is foreign, strange even. An oddity. And he isnât stupid, he knows that time would run up someday and that things would turn against them for a second time.
But, still, the promise of the rest of his life in peace lingers.
He could have it.
He fucking could.
Levi reflects on those thoughts for a moment, silent still.
He thinks he can get to an agreement. Maybe, when she wakes up in the morning, he can try to spill his soul to her a little. Try to understand how she handles this life, how she can get up in the mornings after killing so much, and just have tea with him.
But for now, in the quietness of the night, as the old warrior he was, he does the only thing he knows: he promises to dedicate his heart once more.
He finally has a reason, a purpose, something worth protecting again.
Levi lifts his hand, crossing it on his chest the way all Scouts would do. But he doesnât press it on his heart, but rather, moves it to hold her hand, the one resting on his shoulder. He squeezes it gently, suddenly feeling too overwhelmed by her. By the silent love she had been proclaiming to him all these years and that he couldnât reciprocate before.
Yes. Now it is the time.
Levi would dedicate his heart once more.
To her and only her.
That may have been the cheesiest ending ever written but !!!! He deserves it, I know. Also someone stop me before I write for Hange, the feelings got to me indeed. Dividers by @/cafekitsune @/saradika and @/vase-of-lilies
#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman x you#levi x reader#levi x you#levi ackerman fluff#attack on titan fanfiction#levi ackerman fanfiction#aot fanfiction#writer bee#mine#x reader#reader insert
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haru nsfw headcanons hand them over
(âŻÂ°âœÂ°)⯠ofc friend this damn near wrote itself. This is meant to be very general, I might try writing a fuller fic for him the future since he and MC deserve some alone time. Maybe they can leave the kids with Hyde for the weekend since he's supposed the be the advisor, make that loser do his damn job for once.
notes: they/them used to refer to mc, I have 0 experience writing smut so sorry if this is bad. I tried to keep things gn but a reference is made to face riding x-x this is harder than it looks. much like Haru-
I think Haru would be OK with casually hooking up, but the sex would be a lot less playful? You're doing this to de-stress and don't have a lot of time so no need to do anything extreme. It still feels good, Haru would hate to leave you unsatisfied, but there's a lot less experimentation and he doesn't laugh or crack jokes like he would with a long time partner. There is also the prosthetic to consider; if he has one I don't think he'd want to get fully undressed with someone he's just hooking up with. What happened to his arm is a sore spot even if he acts like it's not, so he doesn't really want to talk about it in a fwb situation even if you are close friends. That's not to say that he would never tell you about the prosthetic and the story behind it, it's just not something he wants brought up during casual sex. If he doesn't have a prosthetic then I don't see him having any insecurities about taking his clothes off with a casual partner, though he probably still ends up staying half dressed just to save time.
If you're dating and he has a prosthetic arm, Haru still needs to work up the courage to take off all his clothes even though he really really wants to. Part of him is afraid you'll think he's broken or ugly, he doesn't think of himself that way but it would really hurt if you did. Praise isn't so much one of his kinks as it is a key part of his personality, he wants you to know that he's with you because he is attracted to you and he loves you. He wants you to say it back to him, needs it really; please tell him how in love you are and how attractive you find him. Want him as much as he wants you and watch how much he gets off on your need.
Loud whiner Haru is so real, he knows he can be loud he's just not ashamed of it at all. He's seen those posts about it being sexy when men moan and he already thinks he's a total catch, that just solidifies it. It ties into his praise kink, he's super sweet during foreplay but he almost always loses the ability to speak once you start fucking, so to let you know how good you are making him feel he just has to make some noise. He only really cries if he's had a really bad day or you've been away for a long time, he missed you Ëâ Ë so let him hold you as close as physically possible.
He's stupid easy to turn on. Laugh at his jokes, pull him around by his tie, even smiling at him will get him hard if he stares at you long enough. The fastest way to get him up is to wear his clothes, it's not smart for an inspector to declare a house allegiance but you will be literally cold before you stop wearing your boyfriend's jacket and he loves seeing you tie yourself to him. It can be sort of hard to tell when he's horny unless he outright tells you because he can hold onto those thoughts for a scarily long amount of time. He'll see you snuggling his shirt while he's on his way out the door to milk the cow and think about that all day until you're done with classes and he can have you to himself. This also means he's really easy to tease, do anything mildly suggestive, he'll start whining and won't even punish you for it later. Unless you want him to of course.
Haru is very big on service, he wants to be the one giving you pleasure but he's not picky on how he does that. If itâs something you're interested in he's willing to try it at least once, but I can't see him being into harder bdsm/kink mostly because it takes too much time to set up. He's been busy and away from you all day, he doesn't want to wait to fuck you. Same with roleplaying, he gets the appeal but it's a lot of work especially if you want to bring costumes or cosplay into it. He also kind of sucks at roleplay, he really likes making you laugh so he accidentally turns things into a joke. It doesn't turn him off at all, but he understands that's not really what you were going for so it might ruin the mood. His one hard no is anything that could injure either of you, he doesn't like seeing you hurt or worrying you when he's hurt.
Or so he says, but if you sit on his face and break his neck he's not going to learn a single lesson from it and will brag about it to Rui and Romeo. He probably brags about a lot of things once he gets drunk actually, in the off chance you were wondering why Romeo isn't making eye contact with you anymore. Everyone in Darkwick knows you rode Haru's face like a bicycle seat and that he wants you to do it again, he has enough sense to know he maybe should pretend to have some shame but he can't bring himself to do it. You want him to be ashamed of making you scream that loud? Please it's not happening he loves you too much. I don't think he'd be super into exhibitionism either, he takes his job as Anomaly Ranger/Tamer really (too) seriously and getting frisky in front of the animals would be setting a bad example! He's less embarrassed about other people seeing, it's just that he really values his alone time with you and doesn't want to share it with anyone.
Other than those two things he's not picky. Want to fuck him in the ass? Just make sure you prep him first. Ride his dick until it falls off? His place or yours? Probably safer at yours. Having a horrible day and want to suck his dick to feel better? How did he get so lucky, you're the best MC. Want him to rearrange your guts remove your ability to walk? He'd love to! But with how overworked he is that last one might be sort of rare. Haru is a very go with the flow kind of guy so if you want him to take a more dominant role he can, but he really appreciates it when you take care of him. Especially with how things are in Jabberwock right now, you gently insisting on taking charge is so sexy of you he might cum without you even touching him.
I could see him maybe liking it if you tie his hands back or above his head with your tie. He'd like to do the same to you too, it's just the impromptu nature of it that he finds really sexy, and again he likes seeing you in his clothes. If you were to tie his hands back while wearing his uniform shirt unbuttoned just enough for him to stare at your chest he'd skip the praise and go straight to the whining; he'd really love to have a picture of you sitting in his lap dressed like that. He's also a big fan of lingerie, but more on his partner than himself and not anything that takes too much time to get off. If you want to put him in a set he won't protest, but he'd prefer you pick it out for him since he's not the best at that sort of thing.
Despite how single mom core he is I don't see him having a breeding kink himself. He likes cumming inside, but more because it doesn't make as much of a mess than because he wants to get you pregnant. He's very good at playing into it if you have one, and if things stabilize in his life to the point he can think realistically about giving Peekaboo siblings then he could really easily develop one, but for now that'd be way too stressful for him to think about.
He gets really tired after sex but takes aftercare super seriously, I keep saying it but he really does want to take care of you. To him sex is another way of saying he loves you, and he doesn't want you to feel like he only loves you by halves. It's not unsexy to him to clean things up, but he doesn't rush it either. He likes being there to hold you, and is always pleasantly surprised when you are the one holding him. If he had more time he'd like to stay like that longer, maybe kiss you awake for a second round in the morning but he knows he can't stay away from Jabberwock for too long. If you're ok with it he takes pictures of you naked in bed together to go with all the ones of you in his shirt, if he's having a bad day he just looks at them and he instantly feels better. He'll never show those ones to anybody even if you would be ok with it, their his little alone time treats.
He's shown everyone that picture of him with his neck brace on when you broke his neck though.
#<3 asks#tokyo debunker smut#n/sfw#tokyo debunker x reader#tdb x reader#haru sagara#haru sagara x reader#god imagine being leo and trying to figure out how to black mail haru or whatever but you can't#because he won't shut up about how good he is at giving head#he's never making eye contact with a ginger ever agin fr fr
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Spider White x Reader
warnings: spoilers for season 2!! also fem reader, since this works the most. (im watching the ep while writing lmao)
plot: basically, when Mr Voss comes back he puts bullshit in the guys heads-and Spider is affected by it a lot, so and so are you.
spiders changed. heâs went from caring about you, and constantly checking on you to ignoring you.
âwomen made men softâ
âspider what the hell.â
the coach is favouriting spider, mostly to make him break up with you.
youâre avoiding him, and youâre scared. scared that heâs going to start doing bad things to you.
so you break it off with him, its hard but you had to.
whatâs crazy is that he didnât care.
âi knew it, you donât support me being a cumlord.â
you tried to take that seriously-but it was too funny. anyway.
staring at him from afar after you broke up with him because you realize that you still love him, even after all the bullshit.
but you cant right now, since Mr Voss has basically convinced him that women are trash and men need to regain their power in the world.
timeskip a few months later, youâre sitting in your room and trying to sleep when who wouldâve guessed..spider walks in.
âhowâd you get in here?â
âyour mum let me in.â
âdamn it mum.â
he sits down and looks away, but you notice heâs a bit teary eyed.
well thatâs new. heâs never cried during the entirety of your relationship. heâs always been the strong man.
âspencer whatâs wrong?â
now heâs sobbing
heâs hugging you and he keeps apologizing, saying that he let all the bullshit get to his head and that he really loves you.
okay now youâre both crying.
for the rest of the night he tells you everything, from how he felt to how heâs really sorry.
he falls asleep beside you as he grips your arm in his sleep.
(HES SO POOKIE I NEED A SPIDER REDEMPTION ARC NOW FOR S2)
#headcanons#spider white#hcs#đ·ïž#HBH#heartbreak high season 2#fluff headcanons#x reader headcanons#amiere wadia#fyyyppp#harper hbh#heartbreak high spoilers
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hiiii !!!! it feels so rare to see a blog dedicated to just fluff so i love ur works sm đ«¶đ«¶
could you write abt reader who doesn't know how to ride a bike and the jjk chars teach them? specifically geto x reader pretty pls <33 thank you :} !
JJK MEN + TEACHING YOU BIKE RIDING
featuring. geto suguru, gojo satoru, itadori yuuji x reader
warnings. mentions of a little blood, scrapes, falling off a bike.
note. omg hii anon <33 thank you for giving love to my work, it means a lot to me. sorry this one took so long, i hope you like it, mwah mwah <33
GETO SUGURU. the first time you wanted to learn how to ride a bike was when geto took you bike riding during the weekends, and you were seated at the back while he was the one maneuvering the bike.
"suguru, teach me how to ride a bike."
and that was all it took for him to actually go 'teacher' mode on you, waking you up at eight in the morning to actually coach you from the basics to the most complex things on bike riding. geto is such a patient man, he coaxes you through your fears of falling â promising how he'd be there to catch you if you fall.
little progress is still progress in his eyes, he will ruffle your hair and call out praises to you. telling you that you did a great job and that he's pretty damn proud of your progress.
and believe it or not, he is a man of his words; every time he sees any signs of imbalance or the slightest bit of odd movements, he'd catch up to you by feet and stand by if you fall (which happens most of the time if he's already up there by your side).
for a couple of weeks, he was up early in the morning to teach you how to ride a bike. and hey, you could see the progress in those times, by the time you were able to steer the bike perfectly fine, geto was actually so proud he almost cried (he said he didn't, but he did, just a tiny bit).
"suguru, look!" just seeing the smile on your face as you pedal the bike made his stomach flutter, he is so happy.
after that, he'd always take you bike riding, same place, same time, this time with two bikes for each of you (although sometimes he prefers it if you sat behind him, hugging him tightly).
GOJO SATORU. i could see him being such a proud little shit when you told him that you couldn't ride a bike, it was embarrassing, but he told you he'd teach you how to. and well, he's not the best at teaching â or demonstrating how to ride a bike (despite him being a teacher and all).
since he could, and you couldn't. he ends up teaching you by actually riding the bike without explaining what to do, but heyâ he's a dedicated man.
"so you just kind of...do this, and then that, and then yeah it just happens!" he grins and you looked at him in confusion, but said nothing anyways.
it made you reminisce the days back at school when the teacher would ask if you understood what they're saying, and you tell them yes just so you could move on and get it over with. yeah, that was what it looks like during the whole time gojo was teaching you.
it took you a good four months. four. months. because gojo, how do i even say this? during sessions, he would steal your bike and use it for himselfâ giving it back to you when he feels satisfied, and so it took longer for you to learn.
in fact, it felt like the male was rather a distraction rather than a teacher. but hey, at the end of the day he still succeeded in teaching you how to ride a bike.
"i'm never going to ask you to teach me again," you mutter out, braking in front of him.
gojo gasps out dramatically, "why not? i did it, didn't i?"
he's totally proud of you and he just has to let everyone know, posting pictures of you and he'd write a long caption telling the world about your journey of riding a bike. like a facebook mom.
ITADORI YUUJI. the first time he found out you couldn't ride a bike was when he asks you about bike-riding in the mountains, and you straight up told him you never learnt how to ride one. so, he made it his job to help you learn, and he's not really great at it.
"i don't understand what you mean by that, but yes, let's try it out anyways," yuuji was nervous the first time his grip left the bike's seat, and you were off.
he was trudging behind you, catching up to your slow pace â but still, when he realizes how imbalanced you are, it was too late. one second you were still pedaling the bike, and then the very next second you were kneeling on the ground with a bleeding and scraped knee.
at the very first second he saw you, he was quick to be by your side. he grabs you by your waist and picks you up, muttering out curses under his breath and then apologizing to you non-stop â he felt like it was his fault, he told you if he had been more cautious, you wouldn't be bleeding.
"shit, baby, i'm so sorry. i should've been more careful," he mutters out, wiping off the blood off your wound while blowing on it softly so the pain wouldn't sting as much.
"'s fine, yuuji. it doesn't hurt as much as i thought it would," you chuckle at him, but no matter how hard you try to convince him that it doesn't hurt and it was fine, yuuji still took the blame.
he tries asking you if you still wanted to learn the bike with him, and when you said yes, he's delighted. and more alert, not letting the same thing happen twice. he's such a cutie, he bought you a helmet, a pair of knee protectors, and elbow protectors.
better safe than sorry, even if he bought you those, he was the one catching you when you were about to fall.
for a couple of days, yuuji also tried looking up tutorials on how to ride a bike so that he could explain it to you well, and he was actually quite surprised when you got the hang of it in the first two weeks. proud is an understatement, he's overjoyed that he could take you bike-riding now.
of course he praises you about it, telling how fast of a learner you are and how proud he is. also, he still feels guilty about your fallâ and he tries making it up to you by buying you food (which he didn't actually have to since you've forgotten about the fall anyways).
© CHURIPU 2023 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE !
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jujutsu kaisen x reader#fluff#jjk fluff#jjk#gojo fluff#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#itadori yuuji#itadori yuuji fluff#itadori yuuji x reader#geto suguru#geto fluff#geto#geto suguru x reader#itadori fluff
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Solar return chart observations (2019)
Scorpio rising at 29 degrees
đȘïžThat year was my most traumatic year.
đȘïžThere were countless transformations (mostly endings and also new life-changing beginnings) in that year.
đȘïžI lost many friends. I got gossiped by the whole class. The whole class didnât talk to me. I was slut-shamed and they even spread rumors about me being pregnant while I was just gaining some weight. I was notorious with bad reputation in my school. My first love left me. I tried to run away with my first love. My parents caught me and grounded me for several months. I was literally in solitude. I had no one by my side. Both emotionally and physically. I can even write a whole damn book about this year.đ
đȘïžHowever, I learned how to stay alone happily in that year. (It was not an option. The universe was like BAM you need to encounter THIS to achieve THIS success or whatsoeverđ).
đȘïžMy whole personality before and after that year was so different that no one couldnât recognize me after that year when I went back to school.
Moon in 1st house conjuncts ascendant (in Sagittarius at 0 degrees)
đȘïžMaybe due to these traumatic events, my emotions were running high all the time.
đȘïžEven though I tried to hide my pain and act like a typical scary silent scorpio rising, people still attacked me because I looked so vulnerable.
đȘïžI cried almost everyday in that year.
đȘïžAlso I gained weight like A LOT MY FACE WAS LIKE AN ENORMOUS MEAT DUMPLINGđčđčđč
**I also notice that I gained weight so easily last year when I had scorpio rising even though my moon was in 7th house in Taurus. Might be because of Taurus moon but Idk, scorpio rising year scares me hell a lot now.đș**
Jupiter in 1st house (in Sagittarius at 18 degrees)
đȘïžI gained tons of weight because of my only coping mechanism : binge eating and also due to covid and quarantine.
đȘïžI felt like food was the only escape in my life and I gained like 60 lbs.đ€Šđ»ââïž
đȘïžHowever, I had lucky academic opportunities.
đȘïžI had to change my tuition because everyone including the teachers slut-shamed me and only because of that transformation, I finished high school with high marks and now Iâm in medical school.
đȘïžThanks to my new teachers from new tuition and also those stupid bitches who believed everything they heard without clearly thinking as grown-up adults.đ
Saturn conjunct Pluto in 2nd house (in Capricorn)
đȘïžMy self-esteem declined so low that I rarely even went out in that year.
đȘïžI felt like no one wanted me and I questioned about my worth like thousand times.
đȘïžThroughout the year, transformations related to self-worth and self-love questioned my existence.
đȘïžI was always thinking like âdo I even deserve to eat this or go to this or be friends with them?â every damn time my mom asked me what I needed and every time someone approached me.
Neptune and Lilith in 4th house (in Pisces)
đȘïžMy whole family was very confused about me.
đȘïžThey even thought I was possessed by some ghost because I acted very unusual eg I couldnât control my anger and I kinda self-sabotaged and I just bursted out and cried so suddenly when I was at home (that was just my trauma response I mean I donât really know how they expected me to act after all those punishment they gave me and personal attacks received from my ex-mates)đș.
đȘïžMy parents kept really close eyes on me because they were worried that I would commit su-ici-de and they also had their respective assumptions about me but at the same time, they also outcasted me and thought I was really a slut who slept with lots of men because I did many reckless things without thinking about consequences.
đȘïžI also often had intense vivid dreams and nightmares.
đȘïžI was addicted to vapes and used them secretly in my room in that year.
đȘïžSo effed upđ«
Chiron in 5th house (in Aries)
đȘïžMy first love broke my heart.
đȘïžMy first serious heartbreak.
đȘïžI had to take about 9 months to fully move on from him.
đȘïžMy inner child got hurt and my creativity and self-expression left my soul in that year.
đȘïžI lost my silly child-like spirit in that year.
Uranus in 6th house (in Taurus at 5 degrees)
đȘïžAt first I was planning to study really hard to prepare for my matriculation exam but due to covid, there were huge unexpected changes in my routines and habits.
đȘïžMy plans got ruined.
Venus in 7th house conjuncts Amor (in Gemini)
đȘïžAmor asteroid represents soulmate.
đȘïžI met my first love and fell in love with him like a fool.
đȘïžEveryone warned me because they saw red flagsđ©đ©đ©đ©but I was blindly in love and was like âIâm gonna marry himâđđ.*dies of embarrassment*
đȘïžThat was my first time that I gave actual commitment to someone and I felt like he was my soulmate.
đȘïžI couldnât let go of him for so long.
đȘïžI wrote songs about him.
đȘïžI wrote short stories about him.
đȘïžIt was bitter-sweet but now itâs just a memory.đ
Sun in 7th house (in Gemini)
đȘïžMy main focus was on relationships relationships RELATIONSHIPS and I strongly desired to build meaningful social connections rather than superficial ones in that year.
đȘïžMy hidden enemies also pulled their masks off lmao I had to deal with them the whole year because they kept saying things about me that I didnât even know I did.đ©
Mercury conjunct mars in 8th house (in Cancer)
đȘïžI remember that I was fully in my hermit mode the year I had this placement.
đȘïžI searched articles about how to attack those arseholes spiritually but didnât really take an action because I believed in karma.đ§đ»ââïž
đȘïžI was always reading books about magic, detective, occult and death and I even thought about committing a su-ici-de because I was severely depressed.
đȘïžI was alone but also so blunt (I think I was just trying to protect myself) every time someone tried to befriend me.
đȘïžI cursed a lot and my anger issues were like high up in the sky that one time, the wall cracked because I punched while I was angry and Iâm just A GIRLđđđ„°).
Vertex in 9th house (in Leo at 15 degrees)
đȘïžMaybe because of all of this, I started to pray to Buddha every single day in that year.
đȘïžI suddenly became so religious and I felt like I only had him by my side.
đȘïžMy beliefs about religion expanded and I started to learn about other religions too in that year.
đȘïžAlso fated events occurred at my school so yeah vertex can say a lot about your upcoming year.
đȘïžImmediately CHECK YOUR VERTEX IN YOUR SOLAR RETURN CHART RIGHT NOW!!!đ„±
My scorpio ascendant was in my natal 5th house
đȘïžMy main focus was on relationships and dating as Iâve already said.
đȘïžI also think I was so fertile in that year or maybe horny?
đȘïžI wanted to get pregnant with my first love and I was only 14 at that timeđđđ (I know I was so silly but I was just a kid so I forgive myself for that *dies of embarrassment again*).
đȘïžSex education and vapes and drugs might be normal for teenagers in western countries but in my country, theyâre like really taboo topics and parents biggest nightmare was their drug addict children getting pregnantđ.
đȘïžAlmost everyone did not dare to discuss about those openly in those days.
đȘïžAlso I was just 14 at that time so itâs not my parentsâ fault that they stopped me and restricted me too much but however, their punishment was directed in a wrong way and thatâs why I had to find other ways to suppress my pain. I donât know who to blame, myself or those so-called friends or my parentsđ.
So in conclusion, it was a very hard year and very life-changing and unforgettable but it shaped me into who I am today so Iâm really happy to receive all of those new experiences. English is not my first language so please bear with me if I made some mistakes.đ«°đŒđ
Also you can ask me about two placements (maximum) you want from your solar return chart. Iâll answer them as soon as I get free time.â€ïž
My mood in 2019 as GIF be like:
#astrology observations#solar return chart#astrology#astrology notes#astro notes#synastry observations#scorpio rising#astro observations#asteroid astrology#venus in gemini#sun in 7th house#vertex
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Rewrite the stars
Pairing: Sirius black x reader
Summary: you and Sirius have been in love since you were mere teenagers, but life seems to have other plans for the both of you.
Warning: angst and heartbreak
AN: I hope this makes you cry because I cried writing it. This was supposed to be a song fic but I donât know how I feel about making characters sing I feel so awkward writing it so this is what it ended up as.
Your life had been damned since the day you were born. At a young age you Sirius and regulus would sit in the garden under the stars as you rambled on about random things. âI think our lives are written out in the stars.â You said laying on your back. Sirius and regulus turned to you âhow do you mean?â Sirius asked, regulus hummed along as he always does, heâs the more quiet out of the three of you. You smiled looking at the stars with so much adoration âwe all have a destiny right? I believe it was written in the stars, and we just cant read it how we would if it was in a bookâ seven year old you said. âI think each star represents one person's destiny, thatâs why some shine brighter than othersâ. Sirius smiled âdo you think were written in the stars?â He asked, causing regulus to sit up, also wondering. You giggled âI donât know silly, thatâs kind of the point.â You said, âbut, i like to think we areâ you said pointing to the brightly shining row of three stars. Two closer together than the other.
Now ten years later you sat alone at the end of the slytherin table, body rigid, just as anyoneâs would be these days. But for you especially, you were terrified, and the only person who could bring you out of that headspace was sitting across the room with his longtime group of friends. You stared at him, the light in his eyes made you envious, angry that your eyes no longer shone like that. But it made you happy that he got out, out of this life. At least one of you had. You and regulus hadnât been able to, now your parents are forcing you into a marriage. You and regulus are best friends with no romantic feelings for eachother whatsoever. But your parents had not one care and had been best friends with his parents since they were young and in hogwarts themselves. The deal had been set in stone some before you were born. Except it was supposed to be with Sirius. âYour staring againâ You hadnât noticed when regulus had sat down but you were happy he broke your trance before you had the chance to humiliate yourself yet again.
âHave i ever told you how grateful i am for youâ you joked, though your tone had nothing humorous about it. He filled his plate not even looking up at you ânot nearly enough as you should, but yesâ he answered. You huffed out a laugh âyeah well i amâ regulus hummed, like he did since you were kids. You never really minded that he was quiet, more so because you were too but also because it left you alone with your thoughts. âYou should eat, youâve been doing a lot less of that latelyâ he said pushing a plate towards you. You sighed looking down at the plate of food you werenât even aware he prepared. You ate a little over half of the food before you felt eyes on you.
immediately you knew where it was coming from. You looked across the room, meeting eyes with this brown ones your heart longed to wake up every morning to. You longed to be with him so bad it made your chest hurt physically. The only thing that had kept you going so far were the meetings you had in a room you didnât know existed until Sirius caught you walking alone in the halls and dragged you to it.
He nodded his head slightly, and you nodded back. That was the confirmation that youâd meet tonight after dinner. You broke eye contact with him and looked to the darke he aired curly head in front of you whoâs head was down as he read his book while eating. âCan you cover for me again?â You asked. His eyes looked up at you from his heads lowered position. Rolling his eyes he nodded âjust donât stay out as late againâ he said. You smiled âregulus black you are a gift sent straight from heavenâ you joked before finishing your food.
Now itâs around 11:00 at night and you and regulars were finishing your rounds around the school. Somehow (very obvious how) you both had been elected as prefects. So you had a little more freedom after the other kids went to bed. You not to subtly parted from regulus, when you reached the corridor that lead to the room you and Sirius had been meeting in.
When you arrived he was already there in all of his glory. He was sat with his head down and brown locks covered his face. You guessed he hadnât heard you come in because hes head remained down. âSiri?â You spoke, his head immediately shot up, his brown eyes slightly wide. âAre you okay?â You asked, he nodded standing up to walk toward you. âIâm fine, loveâ he confirmed. Your heart soared at the nickname.
he grabbed your hand softly and just held it examining your face with soft eyes. âI- i have a crazy, probably very idiotic idea.â He murmured, you giggled âyou have a lot of thoseâ you joked lightly, âi know i doâ he laughed but his expression quickly grew serious âBut i want you to hear me outâ
the air in the room grew tense, âSirius what are you on about?â You asked, growing worried. There were very few scenarios where Sirius was actually serious âIronicâ. Worry etched onto your face, and Sirius saw that. He leaned in to kiss your forehead bringing his hands to hold the back of your head. His lips were soft and gentle as always. He pulled away but the tip of his nose was still grazing your hairline âcome live at the potters with meâ he said. Your heart dropped, you pulled away to see if he was toying with you. He wasnât, his expression mirrored determination. âYou must be jokingâ you muttered, still not believing the words that slipped through his soft lips. He shook his head âi'm notâ.
you pulled away completely, turning away from him while running a hand through your hair, your heart raced with anxiety at the mere thought of it. Puting all of these people in danger. âSirius, that is absolutely insane, even for you. I mean you can't possibly have thought this throughâ you stressed. He rushed toward you and quickly but gently turned you face him again. âI have i swearâ he defended. You shook your head âyou cant have. All of the people that would endanger. All of your friends, regulus, you, me?â You listed. âIâve talked to James and his parents, love they miss you. I miss youâ he begged. You frowned tears filling your eyes âand I you, but you know the lengths my parents will go to keep me under their control, and regulus, i can't just leave him.â
âWe can bring him tooâ you laughed incredulously at his statement. âYou and regulus have barely spoken a word to each other since you left homeâ you stated. A silence covered the room like a blanket, both of you not sure what to say âi would do⊠anything⊠to have you backâ he murmured, his eyes were glossy and full of tears. âI would too, but i guess we werenât written in the starsâ you mumbled, not trusting your voice to speak at full volume.
At that moment you could see recognition and hurt flash in his eyes. The reminder of that night all that time ago, when heâd asked you if the two of you were written in the stars. So much had changed since then and you wasnât sure when it all started and you hated that it had to be this way but you had to protect him.
Sirius then dropped down to his knees, grabbing bit of your hands âY/n please. I am begging you, come with me. We can protect each other, weâll run away and hideâ his voice shook as tears flowed freely down his face. You held back a sob, tears clouded your vision and all you could see was a muddy outline of him. âThere is not a place in this planet that they wouldnât find me, if I go Iâm a danger to you all and I wonât let that happen.â You cried, Sirius dropped his head against your lower stomach and cried, you felt his tears soaking your sock.
You joined him on your knees resting your head on his shoulder, and he rested his on yours. âThere is nothing I want more than to spend the rest of my life with you. To have children and watch them grow up. To see them off to Hogwarts every year. Nothing.â You whispered broken.
âBut we canâtâ Sirius finished for you, you nodded âbut we canâtâ you repeated almost inaudibly. After a while of sitting in each other's embrace Sirius lifted his head from your shoulder, causing you to lift yours. You took in his broken expression. red eyes, rosy cheeks and nose, and you were sure he was doing the same to you. âKiss me, before we part ways Sirius pleaseâ you begged, you wouldâve felt pathetic begging for anyone else but Sirius was different. You were meant to be, just maybe not in this life.
He gently placed his hands on your cheeks, thumbs rubbing your skin âare you sure?â He asked. You nodded frantically, âyes just pleaseâ your tone pleaded. He nodded with a soft smile, he began to lean in and your breath hitched, you could feel your body tingling from excitement and desire. You were sure your cheeks were red from how hot your face felt. When his lips met yours butterflies erupted in your stomach. His lips were soft and you could taste hints of honey from the chapstick he wore all the time. Your lips moved in unison almost like a practiced routine. Your hands found his hair and the kiss deepened, nothing harsh you just poured your hearts into this one kiss. You pulled away, feeling your chest tightening from the lack of breath.
You both breathed heavily in efforts to catch your breath, your eyes eventually met, and the air released all tension. âIâm glad we did that,â he whispered. âMe too,â you replied with a smile.
âWhen this war is over and your parents are gone, Iâm gonna marry youâ he said. You smiled sadly, you both knew the possibility of the good winning the war were slim and your parents dying were even slimmer but it wouldnât stop you from keeping up hope. âI should goâ you forced yourself to say. Sirius frowned. He knew that this was probably your last spontaneous meeting and he wasnât ready to watch you walk away yet but in all honesty he wouldnât ever be ready. So he nodded âokayâ he said, he didnât fight or resist and you thanked the heavens above because is he had you werenât sure you wouldâve left. âI love you Sirius blackâ your voice broke. âAnd I you y/n l/nâ
#s0urw00lf#sirius black x reader#sirius black#sirius orion black#sirius black x you#sirius black x y/n#sirius black x self insert#ben barnes#harry potter x reader#mattheo riddle#the marauders#regulus black#regulus black x reader
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Part one. Part three.
SYNOPSIS:"Ghost" is your new neighbor in your apartment complex, everyone is afraid of him, but not you. You're the only one to be kind with him.
PAIRING: (Based of comic but that's not 100% canon) Simon Riley neighbor x FÂĄReader
WORD COUNT:3.212k
WARNINGS: Fluffy, angst, mentions of blood, war, s.a (not directly) etc.
NOTES:There we go, back to the crying season. I literally cried while writing this one, so i really hope you guys like as much as i did. Remembering, this is the part two of this mini serie. And i HIGHLY recommend to listen to 'happier than ever' by Billie Eilish while reading this.
PREVIOUS PART
Itâs been almost a month. Almost a month since Simon appeared at your door, he drinked some coffee with you, had a long talk that showed little things about him. And after he left your door to work, itâs been days since you donât hear footsteps on the apartment above yours. You canât help but worry, he said his work was hard, tiring and had big choices. You pace around your house, feeling a weird knot on your stomach, a strange sensation of anxiety consuming you, not seeing his eyes, hot hearing his chuckles, not smelling his unique scentâŠall of this makes you feel strange, heâs just a neighborâŠright? So why are you feeling this way? Heâs used to doing this, staying out, working and coming back, heâs fine thatâs right. Then why couldn't your heart understand this?
The only thing keeping you calm is your little cat, her fluffy fur on your legs as she brushes herself against you, looking for some caress. You sit down on the couch and sigh, trying to think better and your cat jumps on your lap, purring while your fingers brush her fur gently. Itâs almost like she can sense youâre not well at the moment, and tries her best to distract you.
ââYouâre a smart kitten, no?â A sad smile flows out, and you can only breathe deep for a moment. You don't know why youâre feeling like this, heâs only your neighbor whoâs a bit mysterious, you shouldnât be worried about him. And yet, your last talk with him made you think all those days about him. He seems like someone who suffered a lot, even if he didnât tell you what exactly. You can see it, his baggy eyes carrying a sad sparkle on it, like he saw so many things you canât even imagine. Somehow, you appreciate his bravery, without even telling, you supposed that he suffered, only from his eyes.
Heâs always using a balaclava, so there must be a reason for this. Maybe heâs insecure about his face, maybe he just wants to protect his identity for someone, or he just doesn't want people to read his emotions. If the last one is the answer, heâs terribly wrong, because only from his eyes, you could sense how this man carries a lot of weight on his shoulders.
Since when he moved in, youâre caught about his whole figure, everything about him was a mystery, like he canât really trust anyone. You look around for a while, looking at the pictures on your home, you remember how Simon was staring at them non stop the last time you saw him, his eyes were painful to see, his eyes narrow to the frames as his eyebrows furrowed as your voice called his attention back. Something about family pictures made him perplexed.
Itâs weird to say, but damn, you missed him. His raspy voice, his tall figure towering over yours, his short words, his eyes never leaving your face as you talk, heâs a great listener, you could say. Even without knowing much about him, you wanted to see him again, hear his voice, feel his scent, make eye contact, feel this weird human connection you two created quickly. You groan and roll your head back to the couch, staring at the ceiling while your mind donât stop not even for a second, your mind filled with Simon and everything you noticed about him, like how calloused his hands are, how he seems to be a terrible sleeper, how he looks to hold himself back while he talks, scared he will expose more about his life, how he has a habit of shakes his legs every time, how his eyes donât stop still, theyâre always looking around, as if heâs making sure heâs safe. Every little detail that you could think of, you paid attention to him, like you never did before, you never was this detailed about someone, neither that interested about someone. He has something special, something that curls you up in his hands.
As for Simon? Being on a long mission wasn't that easy. Staying hours awake, the reason why heâs a terrible sleeper, sleeping in uncomfortable tents, thinking only about his objectives all day. It was awful, but, the only thing that reminded him heâs still human, is his friends, his teammates, the only ones he can say some dad jokes sometimes, the only ones who remind him heâs only doing his job, and nothing else, and somehow, that made him feel better. Knowing heâs not alone in this, that heâs not the only one making his hands dirty with blood, the only ones who made him feel less guilty for the blood dripping on his mask. Besides that, sometimes he caught himself thinking of his neighbor, the only one who had the courage to talk to him, that looked him in the eyes, that listened to his short talk, his voice and saw his miserable life. And yet, you donât even know the whole story, if he did tell youâŠwould you still smile at him? Would you still look him in the eyes? Would you still not be afraid of him? Would you still think he deserves to be loved? Because, he, himself, doesn't think he does. After all he did, all he passed through and lost, he didn't have a chance to be happy and live an ordinary life, he always had to remind how useless he was at protecting his family once, how he was a cowardly kid, how he suffered in dirty hands, how he felt used. Nothing more than a war machine, a big, strong and scary man that everyone frightens, thatâs what he is, in his mind. As for you, such a gentle, kind and delicate womanâŠwhy would you listen to someone like him? He thinks he doesnât deserve your kindness.
For now, there he is, stepping back to his apartment, his heavy boots making some noise as he's not even looking at the way heâs doing. Itâs always like this when heâs back from a long mission, he felt like he was on automatic. His mask, a bit dirty like his gear, and he had some wounds too. He made his way on the halls, going to the elevator, itâs late, like 4AM.
And a soft voice calls for him before the elevator comes, the creaky wooden door behind him making noise.
ââSimonâŠ?â âItâs your voice, heâs already used to that sweet melody. He doesnât turn to face you, not wanting to scare you with his actual state.
ââHello.â âWithout noticing, you left a sigh of relief.
ââYouâre back. I was worried.â âYour words make him disbelief, he turns to face you, and you can see a mask on his usual balaclava, his eyes widened as his pupils shake.
ââYou shouldnât.â
ââIf I could control that. But I couldn't, and I'm happy youâre back." âHis eyes fall to your figure, rubbing your eyes as youâre still sleepy, your pajamas from that day, and your voice sounds like honey.
ââWhat happened to you, Simon?â
ââI was working.â
ââNot this, these woundsâŠâ â Realization crawls up to his mind, you shouldnât be able to see him like this.
ââShit.â â He mumbles under his breath and looks away. Your figure walks closer to him, itâs dark to see properly.
ââPlease, come in. Let me take care of this for you.â
ââNo need, I'm fine, thanks.â âHow could he say no to your cute little eyes, looking up and down on his body, looking for every wound. Your fingers go to his arms, gently touching and pulling him inside your apartment. Without a word, he just follows, he could easily get rid of your hands on him, and he didnât.
You close the door and make him sit on your couch, picking up a med kit in your kitchen, sitting beside him.
ââYouâre not going to ask why I'm like this?â
ââOnly if you want to say why.â â Your eyes meet him, looking for his approval before you lift up the sleeves of his gear, finding a very bad wound on it, how he wasnât feeling the pain? He just nods, and you lift his sleeves gently. He loved how caring you are, always searching his approval for everything, even simple things like this. He loves how gentle you were towards a man like him.
ââThenâŠcan we not?â
ââOf course, Simon.â
He always enjoyed how his name would sound in your tongue, in your voice. It made his heart skip a beat everytime. With caution, you clean up his wound, and he doesn't hisses, doesn't frown or groan, he just watches in silence, looking into your eyes all the time. Nothing matters now, not the pain, not the blood, no. Only you, and your kindness.
ââWhat were you doing awake?â
ââI wasnât. I heard your footsteps.â
ââHow did you know it was mine?â
ââI guessed. Youâre the only one who would walk around at this time.â âHis dark brown eyes were staring at your face, you looked so concentrated now, even while sleepy like this, you managed to do this. To take care of him.
ââWhy are you doing this?â
ââBecause I care about you, Simon.â
Those words, itâs been years since he heard it, seem unreal. Why would you care about him? What did he do to deserve such kindness? Is God finally hearing his prays he did when he was young? No, youâre only his neighbor, this is normalâŠright?
ââWhy?â
â"Do i need a reason?" âHe only looks away, his head nodding at your words. You were right, you donât need reasons to do what youâre doing. Though, he really wanted you to have one. He needed you to have a reason to help a man like him.
A comfortable silence creeps in between both, itâs a silence that yells inside, so many questions on both sides, but no one wants to ask it. Simon looks on your window, the curtain flowing and showing the moon bright in the sky, giving him a feeling he never felt beforeâŠlove, in its truest form, just pure love. Being taken care of like this, he doesnât even know why he accepted this, normally he would ignore it and go to bed, sleeping only two hours or less. But you, have your gentle fingers wrapping his wound now, gently patching it with a gauze, you had some talent for this, he wonderedâŠhave you ever taken care of someone else? Because you seem to be used to this.
ââWell done.â âYou mumbles under your breath, your eyelids blink slowly, youâre so sleepyâŠitâs adorable.
ââThanks.â âOh really? Is everything he can mumble after this help? He canât express anything more than this. Honestly, he didnât need to, his eyes locked with yours, your body painted with the moonlight and the dark blue sky, and you can see how he feels grateful for you. You smile gently.
ââNo need to, I was just worried when I saw you like this.â
Simon sighs, taking off the skull mask on his covered face, leaving only his balaclava as youâre used to.
ââItâs normal for me to get back like this.â
ââWith wounds?â
ââNot only on my body.â
ââYou know you canât live like this forever, right?â
ââI always did.â
ââAnd this will hurt you eventually, Simon. You canât hide emotions and think everything is okay. They will overflow.â
ââYou donât know me well for this.â âSimon gets up from your couch, his voice getting rougher, and looks at your door. You felt a twist in your guts, heâs worried you might figure him out, because youâre already doing.
ââIf youâre being kind only to know my past, forget it. Iâm not a storyteller.â
ââWho told you I wanted this? Iâm pretty sure it was yourself.â âNow itâs your time to get up and meet his eyes, his eyes canât lie to you.
ââYouâre tricking yourself with this, Simon.â
He hated this, how pretty you look while your skin sparkled with the moonlight, how your eyes made him nowhere to run, how you would read him like a book, even if you two donât know for a long time.
ââYou donât know me enough to say that.â
ââBeing cold wonât keep me away, if that's what youâre trying to do.â
The only thing Simon does is curse under the black silk on his face. He didnât like to look so predictable, so vulnerable like this. But at the same time, he just wants to be taken care of by you, and only you, no one else. He stays silent for what seems like an eternity, there's nothing else to say. What would he do now? Being cold wasn't going to keep you away, and he knows he will only hurt you, and lose someone like you would be dumb. All of his thoughts were making him dizzy, it was too much, he didnât feel like this in years, and now it just makes him confused, he doesn't know how to deal with this anymore.
ââLook, Simon, itâs okay. You donât have to agree with what I say. I just want you to know that even if I don't know you too well, youâre already someone I care about.â âYou whispered to him, this tone was enough to bring him back to reality. His heart skips a beat at your words, he didnât deserve you. At least he doesnât think so.
ââDo you even realize what youâre saying? Iâm a stranger at your house. Arenât you scared?â
ââNot of you.â âA cute smile spreads on your face, and poor Simon, he feels his legs weaker, his heart melt at the same second.
ââYouâre crazy. I canât understand you.â
Heâs being genuine on this, he canât understand how optimistic you are, how cute, pretty, kind you are. And damn, that hairs of yours, the smell makes him insane, he always tries his best to stay away.
ââAnd I can't understand you as well, weâre even now.â âSimon canât help but chuckle in disbelief with your words. Oh God, why couldnât he have a normal lifeâŠby your side if thatâs possible?
ââLook, [name], I appreciate the help. I should go now, I already messed up your sleep too much.â
ââWaitâŠcanât you stay just until i sleep? I canât go back to sleep alone now.â
ââUhmâŠsure.â âHe looks away, and you giggle. Quickly, you make your way to the couch again and make yourself comfortable there, laying your body and closing your eyes. He watched every movement, not really wanting to look like a perv or something, he wouldnât ever want to make you embarrassed.
ââGoodnight, Simon.â
ââNight.â âSimon clears his throat, looking while you find a good position to sleep, you look so peaceful. Maybe having him around makes you feel this way. His eyes are glued to your face, so delicate and calm while you breath slowly, it was an adorable sight, he thought to himself. His thick accent was the last thing you heard before falling asleep, quicker than he thought you would. Simon looks around and sees a blanket on another couch, he takes it and gently puts it above your body, making you nuzzle into it as the cold breeze was a problem your sleeping figure didnât know it needed help. âHow stupidâ he thinks to himself, heâs a war criminal, why the hell does he have a soft stop for a person he doesnât even know the age? His strong arms could rip you apart, since youâre so fragile like this. Correcting himself, he could, but he couldnât even think of doing it, youâre so delicate, he just wants to protect you, not the contrary. He sighs, and notices heâs been looking at your sleeping figure for a long while now. He walks to your door and holds the handle, but something curls on his legs before he can walk outside, itâs your kitten. That lazy female cat who decided to greet the man on his second visit here, her white and orange fur on his gear.
ââBloody hell.â â Simon caught himself watching his tone for you, not wanting to wake you up. The little kitten meows while twirling around Simonâs legs, he sighs and rolls his eyes up, one hand holds his mask, the other rubs the catâs chin with his gloves on, so rough, and yet, bent down to caress your cat.
ââNowâŠlet me leave, lilâone.â â His strong accent keeps there, while heâŠwhispers with your cat. He gets up and opens your wood creaky door with caution, giving a head nod to your cat and closing the door when he steps away.
Itâs so hard to leave, to leave that warm, cozy, happy place. To meet his dark and cold home, he can only sigh with the thought. Why is it so hard to leave? Why is his heart throbbing? Thatâs stupid, heâs not a teenager anymore, heâs a grown ass man that can deal with his feelings, he thinks so. Heâs only trying to fool himself into that idea, because he knows when he steps his foot inside his apartment, he will crave for the sound of your voice, your warmth and your damn smile, and mostly, your words. So well chosen like you know exactly what to say to make him fall. Youâre clever enough for his rudeness. He knows you will be just below, living your life peacefully and he will get back to his miserable life, alone, with his bad thoughts. If only he was open to his own feelings, he would see how fucked up he is now. Already missing you and wanting to stay by your side. His delusional mind wanders to a life together, you would say him goodbye when heâs out for missions, calls him, send letters, and he would keep a photo of you on his pocket, only so when heâs not motivated, he looked at it and remembers why heâs there, to make you safe. He would come back to your arms and stay beside each other, you would see his face behind that balaclava and smile, knowing the real Simon, while he leaves Ghost on the job.
Thatâs when he comes back to earth, being on his balcony, his balaclava lifted up a little bit as he smokes, taking a puff of his cigarette and sending it back into the sky with a blow. The breeze makes him shiver even with his gear still on, and the thoughts consume himself.
â"I'm fucked up."â Simon realizes when his thoughts wanders too much. He tosses the cigarette on the floor, stepping on it as his raspy voice talks to himself. Going to bed at 6AM, and not even being able to sleep, because his heart decided to throb about someone he doesnât even know well, his brain decides to play with his sanity once more. He canât take this feeling growing inside of him, itâs weird. Simon stares at the ceiling, laying at bed, his hands caressing his chest as he feels pain inside, right on his heart. Not even his patched wound would hurt like this.
What is this feeling...is he...falling in love? You leave him in tatters. And even while he's thinking you're perfect, you still have your problems as well, he's not the only one broken, and he will discover this soon.
#fanfic#fictionalslvr#cod mw2#cod x reader#cod mwii#ghost cod#ghost call of duty#simon ghost riley#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost x y/n#ghost x female reader#simon riley x you#simon riley x reader#angst#light angst
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hopes you don't mind be asked about headcanons!! but I adore how you write them!! What about Prime Assets and hugs? How huggable they are from 0 to 10? Would they hug each other?
Ohhh this one has the potential to be so silly and yet so sad... All of them could use a good hug (I'm hugging Coyle to steal from his back pocket :) )
COYLE
- Starting out mediocre, Coyle ranks at a 4/10 on the hug scale.
- His hugs are so stiff and so awkward, it's like hugging a plank. You might also get zapped so watch out.
- You know those awkward dad hugs? The ones where it's just a side hug? He can barely even manage those.
- If you gave him a proper hug, he'd keep his hands out to the side, no contact. You'd think he'd get handsy but no, he's so confused by the hug he just freezes up.
- Please don't surprise him with a hug he will suplex you.
- Also he is Not Soft, and his leather jacket smells funny. Not funny haha, funny weird. Mostly like cigarettes and sadness.
- Definitely mumbling something weird during the hug that makes you reconsider your decisions. Not weird enough to pull away but enough to make you think "damn was this really a good idea"
- Take this hug opportunity to fuck with his battery, he's too caught up in how awkward this is to notice. Steal his wallet too, for funsies.
- Would have a hard time chasing you after you hugged him. Not because he's developed some sudden emotional connection but bc that was Weird and he now dreads looking you in the eyes.
MOTHER GOOSEBERRY
- 15/10 for hugs, the most comforting hug you will ever receive in your entire life. If you consider Futterman's presence however it drops down to a 9/10.
- Futterman threatens you about 5 seconds into the hug, if you try anything funny you're getting drill to the face. This is why he affects the score so much.
- There's also the chance that he's going to whisper a question about your dental hygiene, and God help you if you answer no to flossing.
- Ignoring the goose demon, hugging her is sooo nice. She's warm and soft and bc she's so tall anyone who's short is getting surrounded by nice hug.
- She loves hugs, she loves to give and receive them. You can even potentially make her nonviolent for a minute or two if you offer a hug.
- Pray for your spine though bc she gives bear hugs. She will not hesitate to crush the life out of you with her squeezes.
- The kinda hugger that pets your head and calls you her sweet baby, or something like that. Again, most comforting hugs in the world.
- You can ask to hug Futterman but he'll just hiss at you. Man hates being hugged. Being involved in a hug is already bad enough.
- If you're small enough she will pick you up during a hug. She could very easily lift someone but if you're smaller she's more likely to think of you as a child.
FRANCO
- He's hard to rank bc how do you rank someone who either tries to kill you or cries when you hug them. I'm gonna give him a 6 or 7/10 because the hug itself isn't too bad if he doesn't go for violence.
- The violent reaction is mainly bc he's not used to anybody being kind to him. Most times he's had human contact it's been to hurt him.
- That's also why he cries. He's so unbelievably touch starved that an innocent hug can send him spiraling.
- You better hug him while he cries. He might track you down afterwards if you don't, nobody can know he cried like that. Also, you hurt his feelings :(
- If you DO continue to hug him, prepare to be crushed in his arms. He's shockingly strong, and he's clingy when he's upset.
- Also don't he surprised if he ends up in your lap tbh. You gave him the hug, you should've expected this to be how things would go. Man just wants some comfort.
- He's gonna try to bury his face into your neck, even if you're a lot shorter than him. He'll hurt his back hunching over, he doesn't care.
- He is constantly in a state of not wanting to be touched but also desperately needing a hug. It's like dealing with a cat.
- If you pet his hair or say anything comforting he will cry so hard he throws up I do not make the rules.
GROUP HUGS
- BAD IDEA.
- Franco and Coyle would rather die than hug each other. Gooseberry is going to make them be friendly whether they like it or not.
- She makes them hug and they're just whispering threats to each other.
- "Putting you in prison will be the nicest thing I do to you." "Good luck putting me in prison with a fuckin' incisor lodged in your shin."
- Gooseberry picks Coyle up when she hugs him and he freaks out. He doesn't know what to do so all he can do is Flail.
- On one hand, he's attracted to her. On the other hand, keep your hugs to yourself, woman!
- You know damn well Franco is requesting hugs from Gooseberry every single day.
- He is just a sad little boy and he needs a comforting hug from her. This is how he convinces her to hug him every single time (not like he has to do much convincing, she loves hugs).
- Futterman wants to turn him into a fine paste. He knows what that little shit is up to and he's not having it. Leave his daughter ALONE.
- He's stopped full-on crying after getting so many hugs from her, but he still gets a little teary-eyed. Especially when the head petting comes into play.
Ask me as much as you want! I will happily take 18 requests from the same person, I do not mind!!
#leland coyle#mother gooseberry#dr futterman#phyllis futterman#franco barbi#il bambino#outlast trials#outlast#outlast asks#fuel my brainrot it makes me happy :)
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Kenny reader x leorio, kurapika the phantom troupe hisoka and illumi
HXH w/ Kenny!Reader pt. 2
Characters: Kurapika Kurta, Leorio Paladaknight, Illumi Zoldyck, The Phantom Troupe Type: Headcanons, Gn!Child!Reader, Crack?
wrote for the phantom troupe as a unit because theres too many of them to write them individually
Warnings: death
Kurapika Kurta
he's shocked every time and swears to avenge your death/remember you forever
but you kinda just...come back every time and he doesn't remember it so he doesn't really do anything
he's another one who can't understand you but after one too many "Huh?"s on his end he'll pretend like he does
most times he just relies on Gon to translate...
he feels bad about your family situation
his entire clan is dead but he couldn't imagine having to take care of other kids while having neglectful parents, especially at your age
he probably offers you food or something to bring home to your siblings
Leorio Paladaknight
you piss him off
he can't understand you and he doesn't get why you can't just take the damn parka off
"hrmrhfr" "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SAYING" "HRRMMHF" "TAKE THE PARKA OFF IT'S LIKE 100 DEGREES OUT HERE!"
when he finds out you're poor he can relate to you more
and he kinda feels bad for yelling at you about the parka because it's probably your only jacket..
the death thing traumatizes him every time
he already lost a friend to some sort of illness but YOU DYING REPEATEDLY IN THESE WEIRD ASS WAYS??? WHAT THE HELL
since no one remembers your deaths he's just as scared and confused as he was the last time
bro cries over this đ
Illumi Zoldyck
canonically he would not care
like at all
you are just a random poor kid who he can't understand clearly...so you're of no importance to him
sry
The Phantom Troupe
uhhh...literally NONE of them understand what you're saying so good luck
Chrollo likes to pretend he does though
most of the og members relate to you when it comes to the being poor thing
which means they try their best not to overlook you
the others though...they sometimes forget you're even part of the troupe
you have kicked at least one of them in the shin before out of frustration...probably Phinks
and you quite literally had to run for your life
as for the dying thing they mourn you like they do any other troupe member
especially since you were so young
Nobunaga has a soft spot for you and leans down to your level every time you say anything
actually, I think a lot of them have a soft spot for you
and by a lot of them I mean Chrollo, Nobunaga, Pakunoda and Uvogin
don't know why but I think they care about you the most
again it probably has to do w your age
#hxh 2011#hxh x reader#hunter x hunter#hxh#hxh illumi#illumi zoldyck#chrollo lucilfer#hxh chrollo#chrollo hunter x hunter#chrollo x reader#gon x reader#gon hxh#gon freccs#hxh gon#gon freecs#killua hxh#gon#leorio#killua hunter x hunter#hxh killua#killua zoldyck#killua#hxh leorio#kurapika#leorio paladiknight#kurapika kurta#leorio hxh#kurapika hxh#gon freecss#hxh kurapika
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Confidence Boost
Okay, okay⊠I know I already posted a Wind Breaker fic⊠BUT LOOK OKAY? I recently started the manga and I freaking LOVE it. I thought of this fic while reading the manga and knew I wanted to write it. I tried to find a good shot of Suo and Sakura as a pic header but I couldnât so I just settled on a pic of grouchy Sakura <3
Warnings: None really but there are some manga spoilers in here so beware. Also this is a tickle fic so if thatâs not your thing then feel free to just keep scrolling lol.
Summery: Suo wants to help Sakura feel more confident
Suo smiled as he leaned back in his chair. âI donât know whatâs got you so fussed. You wanted to be leader didnât you? Didnât you want to climb your way up and stuff?â
Sakura glared at the earring dangled boy. âN-not like this! I.. I donât freakinâ know how to⊠lead a damn classâŠâ
Suo chuckled lightly. âOh Sakura, itâs just class leader, and itâs just for the first years too. Youâll be fine. Besides, Iâm your vice. I got your back, yknow?â
Sakura couldnât help the blush that colored up his cheeks. He glared more.
âI-Itâs⊠n-not like⊠I⊠um⊠sh-shut up!â He pouted a bit with anger and looked away. Suo could tell that meant a lot. But as usual the poor guy couldnât take a compliment or any kind words to save his life.
Suo just grinned, enjoying how embarrassed he got.
Deciding to take advantage of this moment and gently stuck his fingers into his neck, looking to mess with him.
As soon as Sakura felt the fingers touch the already warm skin of his neck, his eyes widened and he immediately scrunched up his shoulders in a feeble attempt to protect himself. A wave of heat creeped up his neck and ears as well. But even worse, much to Sakuras own horror, he let out the loudest and most high pitched squeal that he swore right then and there he would never make again.
Suo smirked. âHm? What was that Sakura? You okay?â The damn bastard started wiggling his fingers more into his neck. Sakura immediately thrashed in place and tried to pull Suos hand out. Unfortunately Sakura was rendered rather helpless.
âS-Suhuhuhohoho yohohohu bahahahastahahard!!!!â
As if the loud squeal wasnât enough, Sakura just HAD to start giggling like a five year old idiot.
Suo laughed as he knew he had him. âYknow for such an apparent âtough guy,â Sakura, you have quite an adorable laugh. Oh look, youâre blushing too!â
Sakura kicked around in the desk seat and thrashed more. He gave up on pulling at Suos hand and decided to just cover his face instead.
âD-DAAhahahahAHAmIHIHihit leheEhHehet mehehEHeHe GOHOHohoho!!!â Sakura protested.
Suo grinned. âFirst admit that youâd make a great class leader and Iâll think about it.â
âL-Lihihihike hehehell Ihihi WIHIHIHLLLHAHAHAHA!!!!â
As soon as Sakura started saying that Suo abandoned the neck and drilled into his lowest set of ribs.
Suo throughly made sure to enjoy each bout of laughter and squeals as he attacked.
âYou know⊠these little ribs over here tend to be most sensitive since there isnât much muscle protecting the area⊠isnât that funny?â Suo told him casually with a smile, as if the other boy wasnât completely falling to pieces beneath him.
âS-STAHAHAP STAHAHAHAHAP IHIHIHT!!!â Sakura cried out with piercing shrieks in his laughter.
âFIHIHIHIHNE FIHIHIHINE IHIHI⊠IAHAHAHAâŠ!!!â
He was sounding like he was really losing breath now. Suo could tell Sakura was trying to just say the words that he asked him to say and so he moved down to his sides, slowly squeezing gently to let him be able to talk while still tickling him.
âIhihi⊠ihihihi⊠ihihihihll mahahake⊠ahaha⊠g-gohohohohood.. c-clahahass l-leheheheahaderâŠ. S-stahahap..!!!â Sakura weakly pushed at his hands.
And so Suo finally decided to let him go.
When he retracted his hands, Sakura wrapped his arms protectively around his body as he gasped for air.
âWh-whahahat⊠whahat the hehehell⊠w-wahahas thahahat f-fohohorâŠ?â Sakura mumbles angrily, still in a slight giggle high.
Suo smiled and tilted his head innocently. âYou just looked like you could use it Sakura. Sometimes you just need a little motivation to gain more self confidence. And I mean it when I say youâd make a great class leader. Sure it can hold a great deal of pressure sometimes, but I know you can handle it.â
Sakura blinked. Then slowly the blush that was still left on his face grew, and his entire neck and face went red. He glared and looked away.
âAwww itâs nothing to blush overâŠâ
âI-I AM NOT!â
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