#curator of my reality

[lamusedhermes]

Curate everything.

Curate your hygiene routine, curate your clothing items, curate your home, curate your habits, curate your nutrition, curate your environment, curate your circles, curate you socials, curate the content you consume, curate your social skills, curate your financial situation, curate your emotions, curate the version of you that shows up in public, curate your hobbies, curate your knowledge.

[mellosdrawings]

noooo not the n2 ship 😭 omg people can be so weird sob sob you have more drawings of them as adults and frankly why does it even matter?!? it's not even an illegal ship sob (eg. incest or smth else that normally turns heads in fandoms) if you don't like it, don't read it???? (i personally like it tons!)

-🥬

(About this post)

Well, you know, it's the usual Leojami age difference discourse. I just delete those comments anyway, but I'm glad you like the N2 squad :3

I won't develop too much since I don't want this blog to be about discourse (I'm giving my opinions plenty on my sideblog) but here's what I think about these topics:

-I'm vehemently anti-censorship. I don't think something shouldn't ever exist and I will never push for something to be censored, even if it's stuff that makes me uncomfortable. I think warnings about particular contents are great, but in the end it's my responsibility to curate my experience with banning # and blocking people, etc etc. Even illegal stuff should be portrayed. If people can draw/write about murderers and conmen without a fuss, then they can also do that about taboo/illegal sexual topics. Depiction is not endorsement.

-I believe the reader/viewer is the one who injects meaning to art/stories. I'm an artist and all the things I do mean something, but that meaning doesn't prevail over the meaning my viewers inject in my art. I regularly see people "misreading" my comics in the tags, but it doesn't matter. Their interpretation is just as valid as mine, and if they wanna see ships where I didn't mean to draw ships, or if they interpret a scene as negative when I meant for it to be positive, then it's either my role as the content creator to be more explicit/obvious with what I meant, or to simply let my viewers have fun however they want with my stuff. I don't believe in the "there's only one valid interpretation and everybody who thinks otherwise is wrong".

(That's also why I don't really believe in DNI. People you disagree with will interact with your stuff anyway, caring about those things will just anger and tire you for nothing. I try to avoid interacting with people who have DNI that probably include me? But considering "proship" means anything and nothing it's hard to tell whether N2/LeoJami is considered a proship or not.)

Tldr: I'm anti-censorship and I think everybody should make and enjoy the content they want, even if it's topics that are usually frowned upon. Imagination is the one place one should be able to go hogwild without fearing retribution.

[bredforloyalty]

please god let me dj tomorrow

[tullycicero]

the funniest part of being in dark academia spaces etc online is that you do really begin to see how like fake all of it is when people are posting and reblogging pictures of your own university (and romanticising your own degree) and they've all just been... desaturated to high heaven like no the shortcut to your lectures doesn't look like that - nothing weirder than seeing people look up to what is essentially half of your life as an aesthetic pinnacle and meanwhile there you are doing studying the classics in an old british university and that is not the vibe

idk it just makes me laugh, seeing photos that can literally include the outside of my own student bedroom being romanticised when i can see very clearly that the sepia filter is blasted to 100 and there aren't tourists everywhere

[skinnypaleangryperson]

Wow, incredible. Back to back from night to morning I read the most unnecessarily rude, abrasive thoughts from a thread on Rick and Morty Reddit, and in the morning and even worse one from BoJack Horseman read (unsurprising, since they're always the worst). When it comes to these communities and the complete lack of "morality"when it comes to these parts of the modern world I'm starting to wonder if I'm in complete hell. When I rent about it on other platforms I'm much, much more deservingly abrasive about the way that these literal absolute abrasive terrible clones are constantly coming out with every day of their life like it's the same person with a different account in a slightly different body, but what's disturbing is that it actually is a different person every time despite the fact that they all have the same exact a morbidly terrible cheap awful malicious personality.

Of course it would be the two things that all of my passion projects, daydreams, and want for community have poured into for the past couple of years. It can't be a coincidence that the most morbidly unnecessarily rude, hypocritical, terrible and attempt at being "abrasive" people would be on these reddit communities. Obviously most of them are self-projecting or are being rude to complete strangers on TV show Reddit communities of all things, and the fact that they have even one minute in their life to do something so low and scummy the way that these people do just goes to show the kind of people that these people are in that they shouldn't be worth worrying about much less being affected by. They wish they had that kind of power.

Still-I've been inwardly 😬😬😬😬 for the past 24 hours. I don't even look at a single comment on these Reddit communities anymore because I know it's just full of either repetitive boring g***bage, or full of people that are so rude and terrible on top of that g****bage that you can't even believe that these people can even function. Every single day it's like they're trying to outdo themselves from how unnecessarily hypocritical, rude, and unnecessarily morbidly distasteful they are, and that's the generous Tumblr exquisite way of putting it, that they are with their excuses for what they call words.

It's amazing that no matter how much you tell these people that no one cares and to not bother their people with their low quality awful rude abrasive unjustified thoughts that nobody wants except for people as low as them, and no matter how many of these clones that I block they just keep coming out like little bugs battering at my face.

[dandyshucks]

blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl

[everytimewetouch-dot-mp3]

today has been such a good day 😭 it took forever to return my router to the wifi store, and i’ve got the worst headache + cramps combination i’ve had in a year, BUT:

tl;dr: so many good things have happened recently, and i’m trying to trust that sometimes good things happen and don’t have to be balanced out by horrible things. i’m so grateful for the good things that have happened, and i’m trying to acknowledge that i had a part in bringing them into reality

i got the keys to my new apartment, and it’s the nicest place i’ve ever lived. like i’m waiting for them to take my keys back and tell me it was a prank, obviously they’re not gonna let some WIC beans-and-rice, food stamps-raised, homeless in high school fuckhead live in such a beautiful building. but they are. they approved my cat, they’ve got my move-in fees, i’ve got the loading dock reserved for move-in day.

my new apartment isn’t infested with roaches. i cried just being in the space for the first time and feeling like. a real person. not like a shameful creature who can’t let their friends come over because of the infestation.

i got to see my best friend, the (platonic) love of my life. it’s not a rare occurrence for me to see her, since we live like 5 (soon 3!!!!) metro stops apart. and she came with me to see the apartment. she asked the questions i didn’t know to ask, and i was able to give her remote access to the building, which is as close as i can come to giving her a spare key

i got an incredible deal on a new bed. the mattress i have now has sunk in the middle and there are a few springs poking through, and it hurts so much to sleep on it. i was resigned to sleeping on my couch for a month or so while i saved to get a nice bed, because ive never had like a Nice Bed. and just idly checking wayfair, i saw a bed frame i loved that was at a $900 discount. nine hundred us dollars off. i never would’ve been able to get something like that if it was full price. and then i found a mattress that was well-reviewed and firm and also discounted. so now i’ll only be sleeping on my couch for like a week.

i was notified that they’re processing my upcoming promotion at work. it’s a $14.3k raise. that’s not a number that would ever have existed to me before, and now they’re processing it, and like. it’s real. that’s happening to me. they’re trusting me with a big like, mission-critical project and they’re increasing my pay and it’s because i earned the trust and the raise, not just because they felt bad for me???

i’m so overwhelmed. when i was a kid i thought all i could ever be was somebody’s wife and somebody’s mother. and now im neither of those things, and im loved and im safe and im finally moving out of this apartment full of shame into a place i can feel proud of.

[walkyjake]

Imdone lying to myself my first favorite gizz song intrasport my second favorite gizz song ambergris my third favorite gizz song tezeta. One day we'll all live.

[lem-argentum]

hes like a bug to me

[takeyourdailydoseofcyanide]

posting isn’t giving me any sort of sense of familiarity or stability in the foundation which makes sense given that everything has been replaced yet again but damn

[lamusedhermes]

Louise Hay: How to love yourself.

[manyblinkinglights]

all the disposable public dive bars in vrchat have fucking BOUNCERS now, ppl with earnest piping little voices asking you to confirm your AGE?! before greenlisting you by username to let you use a door prefab to get in. what has the proliferation of api and moderation tools mcfricking wrought

[writersstareoutwindows]

tagged by @theoxvest, thank you! making a new post just for tidiness’ sake.

Last song I listened to: Song of Durin by Clamavi De Profundis

Favorite color: Pink

Last movie I watched: Miraculous: Ladybug & Cat Noir, The Movie. Which means I’ve seen all Miraculous that there is to see until season 6 and I’m sad about that.

Sweet/spicy/savory: Sweet. So so sweet.

Relationship status: who’s to say

Last thing I looked up: “Zelda totk” in an attempt to learn about Zelda the NPC. Which didn’t immediately work because, well, that’s also just the name of the game. My eventual research did turn up the fact that this girl just can’t catch a break, huh, it’s always centuries of standing as a lonely sentinel with her.

Current obsession: Well Katie Pearlhead weighs pretty heavy on the brain for reasons that are obvious to some. Miraculous was pretty up there before I caught up. My newest Skyrim characters are simmering on the backburner. But truly the lion’s share of my attention goes to thinking about ttrpgs with my friends; one of the reasons I got hooked on Miraculous in the first place is because it would make such a good au for one of my D&D characters—

@within-infant-rind @sierradee @snizx @smallbitterman if you would like! all the other Oxventure people I know have already been tagged!

[nonokoko13]

<<DNI if you shame people for having "cringe" interests>> *proceeds to shame or disrespect someone for having interest in fictional stuff they don't like instead of using the block button even though that person has done anything to anyone*

[lgbttruther]

i like unsourced reposts of anime family guy fanart as much as the next person but 90% of the time if you check the OP's blog, it is full of the most racist "memes" imaginable.

[brainjuicey]

I'm not going to lie, this nytimes article about Val kilmer makes me cry when I read it!