#counting crimes
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me and bae and our matching vapes 🤞🤞🤞🤞
#girlblogging#coquette#lana del rey#besties#bestie#pretty girls#alana champion#coquette aesthetic#lilly rose depp#photoshoot#lana del slay#so lana del rey vinyl#mary kate olsen#mary kate and ashley#8 ball#counting crimes#nessa barrett#hell is a teenage girl#female hysteria#matching set
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Character Bio:
Dana Brooke
CHARACTERISTICS
Age: 18 / 22 Race: Human Gender: Female Eyes: Black Hair: Dark Brown / Pink changes on and off sporadically and without reason. Blood Type: O+ Powers: None, in fact they are at a disadvantage because of their anemia. Weapon: sword (unnamed) Fursona: Squirrel
RELATIONSHIPS
Azure Brooke (father / deceased )
Midori Brooke (mother / deceased)
Tokio Brooke (brother / deceased)
Reece (Reece’s Pieces / Recey / Scottish terrier / dog / dead)
Reiko Mashima (adoptive mother / aunt)
Taichi Mashima (cousin)
Teru Minamoto (ex-boyfriend)
Appearance
Dana is a very average looking girl. She mostly took after her father Azure and has rather plain features but unfortunately got blessed with her mother Midori’s huge rack. However she does have very large and piercing black eyes that have no colour in them. She prefers to dress comfortably rather than fashionably and actively refuses to wear dresses (she claims she’s not a pick me). When she lived at the Mashima residence after her parents died, she was not permitted to wear dresses so now she just has grown not to like them.
Personality
Dana is strong willed and will fight to the death for what she thinks is right. She can be quite stubborn and narrow minded for this reason, often refusing to listen to reason. She also has pretty low self esteem. However, she is a good listener and will instantly light up every room she walks in. Dana introverted than extroverted except when you catch her in conversation then she will talk endlessly about her interests (namely anime merchandise). Her hobbies are browsing Mercari Japan because she likes collecting anime merch but is too poor to do so. She is also a very bad student, that’s why she’s failed her grade 7 times at Cross Academy. Dana is not particularly graceful nor good with a sword but she is a hard worker when she wants to be. She also has a temper so do not anger her or else she will cuss you out with her sharp tongue. She loathes vampires because of what happened to her family and can be very standoffish towards them.
History
Please note this part contains story spoilers.
Childhood Dana was born to Midori and Azure Brooke who were both vampire hunters however she was anemic so she did not carry down the vampire hunter gene and was born as a human. When she was six years old, her family was murdered by an unknown group of vampires and her house burnt down. She narrowly escaped with her life. She also had a vague crush on her older brother Tokio and thought that one day they would run away together. After that she lived with Reiko Mashima who was Midori’s adoptive sister and a human. Reiko always resented Midori so she treated Dana very poorly in their household and did not give her any money for anime merch. However, her and Taichi her cousin were childhood friends and she also had a crush on him (it was one sided completely).
Teenager Years She was admitted to Cross Academy through her own persistence and Reiko allowed it as long as Dana eventually paid them back for her uniform. Dana also vaguely knows the future from her past life where she actually read Vampire Knight and shipped ZeKi that’s the actual reason why she is so driven to see her ship sail because she loathes the character Kaname and the shitty ending of Vampire Knight. So she makes it her entire goal to keep Kaname the hell away from Yuki through any means necessary. This could also be why she failed 7 years so she could finally be in a class with them (it definitely wasn’t because she is “dumb”.) Because her parents were vampire hunters, Kaien makes Dana apart of the disciplinary squad.
Relationships
Kaname Kuran Her enemy the reason for all of her suffering. She hates him with her entire being and wishes he would die in the fiery pits of hell. Kaname on the other hand claims to hate her too but does he…?
Zero Kiryu She admires him so much and thinks he’s so pretty. She often gawks at him and has a very obvious crush on him even though she obviously wants her ship to sail first and foremost. Zero almost never thinks of her except in relation to Yuki.
Yuki Cross Attend the same classes, are roommates and are friends.
Ray Was friends in childhood and has continued being friends today. Possibly the only vampire Dana actually likes. Ray sees potential in a relationship between Kaname and Dana and enjoys messing around in Dana’s life.
Hanabusa Aido Dana thinks that maybe they could be in a relationship one day. He cannot stand her because she is mean to his king Kaname.
Kaien Cross Dana likes Cross a lot and respects him. He, however, loathes her because he was slighted by her mother Midori and never got over it. Dana is completely ignorant of this fact.
Midori Cross Dana had a good relationship with her mom and liked her a lot.
Azure Cross Her father was largely absent in her childhood because of his duties as a vampire hunter.
Teru Minamoto Dana’s ex-boyfriend at her old school. Had a very toxic and bad relationship with him. It did not end well. She hates him.
“Die you sad pathetic rat man with a sister complex.”
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Magical orb that puts a crime count on everyone's head (while Arthur is king), counting the crimes based on the established laws. (Crime count in brackets)
Gwaine (127): this is an outrage
Arthur(3): I am as distraught as you
Gwaine (127): no, no. You don't get to say that! I've worked my whole life on this crime count and I've got less than THEM?
Merlin (847): *crosses arms* protecting Arthur comes with a cost. What I don't get.... Is THIS!!!!
Lancelot (1084): I can explain
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The police in Scotland have the chance to do the most funniest thing right now.
#anti jk rowling#jk rowling#come on grant her wish#though imagine seeing laws coming in to deal with hate crimes#and just instantly throwing a childish style bigot fuelled tantrum#cause you wanna keep being a bigot without consquiences#its all freedom of speech until theres consquiences for said freedom of speech#and of course her fellow transphobes are trying to say the truth isnt a crime...what truth? transphobia???#it counts as a hate crime now not sorry if your in scotland#enjoy getting consquiences for your bigotry#also shout out to someone saying it'd be funny if they only did so they could raid a literal castle#i too think there's at least someone on the force itching to do that
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Wait, how tf did I miss this.
Batman: Wayne Family Adventures #7
You're telling me Forever Evil happened in this universe? You're telling me SPYRAL happened in this universe? I'll have to hope that everything went down very differently because otherwise there's a lot to unpack there that clearly this comic isn't ready for.
#and here I thought this bruce wayne might be more excusable than the others#because if the crime syndicate happened that means spyral happened which means bruce beat up his son to go on a mission in this universe too#unless they changed at all and made it more family friendly (literally)#which I hope so#dick grayson#nightwing#crime syndicate#dc comics#dc#batfamily#batfam#wayne family adventures#batman wfa#side note: ouch because imagine your very traumatic experience that killed you isn't counted as your death#idc if it was only a few minutes it still was pretty damn bad#sure it's not the same as being dead for months#but c'mon
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imprisoned for his crimes
#his crimes are arson larceny murder tax fraud tax evasion serveral counts of aggravated assault and so many more#really glad this was in my drafts#digimon#tokomon#digimon adventure
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A compiled list of various severe crimes committed by one Mr Scar of the Good Times, exact counts pending. Cannibalism (Multiple counts) War profiteering Trading of Souls Grave robbing Fraud of multiple varieties Racketeering Arson (Like a lot of it) Unethical experimentation Acts of Terror Spiritual possession Contract killing Sale of human remains Ritual sacrifice Perpetuating Police Brutality Domestic Terrorism Oathbreaking Violation of the real life Geneva Convention Deceptive marketing Kidnapping Desecration of a sacred place Whatever tf Area 77 had going on Insider trading Extortion Patricide Matricide Unsafe building practices Holy war Desecration of corpses Market manipulation Treason Tax evasion Murder (Lots and lots) Large-scale extreme vandalism Mass enviromental destruction Political corruption Identity fraud
#goodcrimeswithscar#note: ALL OF THESE ARE CANON#if you want to ask about any of them send it to my inbox pls!#like it's all stuff I recall him doing at some point lol#I'm only counting crimes that are considered like reaaaallly bad. stealing and other misc stuff is not on this list for a reason#also going by the law of narrative significance (unless it's funny)#and including stuff that isn't technically a crime but also basically is#tyx is being silly#tyx’s ramblings#traffic smp#life smp#trafficblr#mcyt#hermitblr#hermitcraft#goodtimeswithscar#gtwscar#gtws#your honour it is impossible for him not to be a criminal
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Oh my god I forgot to post this. Hes sending Pin ups to the general!!!
#max klinger#mash#mash 4077#okay but garters and combat boots are absolutely a look. its a crime we never got to see the actual picture#mash fanart#does this count as sugestive?#m*a*s*h
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The Soos are all different brands of scary.
Lee Soo Hyuk comes off as a chill person at first, but he's scary when he gets serious.
Choi Jung Soo has that golden retriever vibe to him, but he does a complete 180 when things get serious.
Kim Rok Soo appears lonesome and lowkey depressed on first impression, but he's literally the most unhinged of them all.
#Kim Roksoo lowkey believes that the quickest and most effective way to cure his depression is by committing war crimes#and we're all here for it#lcf#lout of count’s family#trash of the count's family#tcf novel#tcf#kim rok soo#choi jung soo#lee soo hyuk
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#this is why we can't have nice things#woke is wonderful#donald trump is weird#trump harris debate#harris trump debate#Mary l trump#mary trump#trump is unfit#trump is a cult leader#vote for democracy#your vote matters#vote democrat#vote vote vote#vote harris#vote blue#please vote#kamala harris#harris walz 2024#Harris will make America greater#first female president#lies and the lying liars who tell them#trump is a joke#trump is a threat to democracy#trump is a criminal#trump is weird#Trump is soft on crime#34 counts#lock him up#blue wave
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I'm rewatching leverage out of nostalgia and some other emotion I haven't figured out yet, and I do think there's a story in "Maggie Ford Collins deals with having the most unhinged ex in her suburban book group, learns to hotwire a car, and gets her groove back, not in that particular order."
#nate's weird crime children (all of whom are grown adults) adopt maggie as their....something.#weird former stepmom? dad's ex-girlfriend who drove them to soccer practice once? loosely affiliated maybe-sorta aunt?#...this involves more lying and wearing tight dresses and carrying lockpicks than maggie's used to.#none of them listen when she says this is a job for sophie. they want to show her the benefits of crime!!!!!#she does tell her book club every detail.#currently said book club is trawling message boards and pinging distant facebook connections to get leverage their next case.#maggie is dating a nice art history professor from the local college. leverage is very disappointed.#nate is also disappointed mostly because he thought she'd pick someone terrible and he could ''''rescue'''' her.#unfortunately this guy is okay. he does no crime at all except sometimes taking a penny without leaving a penny#which the leverage crew did not realize was a an actual thing and therefore doesn't count.#......also I do believe that sterling and nate exchanged handjobs in a ramada inn bathroom once or twice#and that maggie does not know this but sophie does.#(maggie would not have been into it but sophie....sort of...is. she likes the mental image.)#leverage
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What not hating Kaname really means
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there was a swedish guy in like the early 1900s that literally just traveled to Australia, attended a funeral of an indigenous person and then HE CAME BACK A FEW WEEKS LATER TO DIG UP THE BONES TO KEEP IN HIS COLLECTION!!!!
DO YOU HEAR ME??!!!
HE WENT ON A FUNERAL AND THEN CAME BACK TO DIG UP THE BONES!!!!!!!
Thankfully the aboriginal people there had heard he had dug up bones previously and they moved the grave.
AND WHEN HE DISCOVERED THIS HE GOT MAD AND SAID THE ABORIGINAL PEOPLE COULDN'T BE TRUSTED
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
#the guys name was Erik Mjöberg for anyone wondering#he was absolutely disgusting AND SMUGGLED BONES OF ABORIGINAL PEOPLE OUT OF AUSTRALIA#If this doesn't tell you about attitudes at the time towards indigenous people from europeans#I don't know what does#Sweden#History#aboriginal#hate crimes tw#i don't know if this counts as a hate crime but I'll still put it there to be safe#regardless it's still definitely a crime towards and disgusting treatment of indigenous people
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Wait a damn minute Merlin is an actual nightmare of a servant. Imagine you're the Prince and all of a sudden and only two seconds after surviving an assassination attempt you're stuck with this scrawny, clumsy fucking dude with a really shifty air about him who spends literal days in the tavern with zero notice, steals your food, tried to spy on a guest, doesn't let you hunt, can never fucking be found when you need him even though he is the literal manservant to the prince, which you would think should be a priority but apparently he has better things to do, and is always talking like he's the only thing standing between you and certain death???? Then he gives you attitude? Literally I would throw things at him too. Arthur is misunderstood he's actually being too nice
#i actually love merlin okay this is a joke#but like damn he did suck at his job#disclaimer the author of this post does not condone mistreating your manservants in any way#if you have a manservant you should count yourself very lucky and show them appreciation#kiss them on the forehead#maybe ask them out#just throwing out ideas#being scrawny isn't a crime but merlin being scrawny is very personal to me#and to arthur i guess#merthur#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#bbc arthur#arthur pendragon
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THE KARATE KID (1984) / COBRA KAI (2018-2025)
#daniel larusso#kenny payne#johnny lawrence#anthony larusso#robby keene#terry silver#cobra kai#bro the parallels are insane#daniel and kenny not even sharing one scene together is a crime#not me now realizing 'lia' is just 'ali' rearranged 💀#i didn't add the arcade one because that was technically a daniel > robby parallel but it also kinda counts imo#i like how daniel hesitates on the apology because a part of him (probably) believes johnny deserves that#vs kenny who stutters while saying 'shit' because he clearly didn't mean to do that#i 100% believe kenny won't go to ~the dark side in part 2 and kenthony will do what lawrusso can't seem to!!! MAKE PEACE!!!#IN THIS ESSAY I WILL
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Cale when his people commit crimes: *shudders* "How vicious...!" Cale when Cale commits crimes:
#tcf#trash of the count's family#lcf#lout of the count’s family#cale henituse#cale#tcf cale#tcf humor#humor#meme#tcf meme#cale the hypocrite#solving all world problems through crimes and scamming#cale is a total clown#cale is a magnificent bastard
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