#comedic exaggeration

[therobotmonster]

Anybody remember when Velveeta ran all those ads telling people what queso dip was because somehow its existence was unknown to a demographically-significant portion of the populace?

Now we have to "Normalize ranch with chicken and meat?"

"Normalize Ranch?"

Ranch with meat isn't just normal. It's Hypernormal. It's been a standard condiment since the Clinton Administration. It's mayo for people who hate mayo.

RANCH FACTS:

They give you cups of it at wing places, you don't ask for it. You have to tell them to give you something else.

They do the same at pizza places, and also sometimes ranch replaces the red sauce.

Ranch is so American it invades food groups like its looking for oil.

I'm in Oklahoma. We still had dry counties up until the twenty-teens and even we've been dipping our pizza in ranch since videogames came in a plastic cartridge.

It's so basic we've gotten desensitized and we're mainlining Green Goddess and Blue Cheese just feel something.

If you have too much shame to put ranch on something, like meatloaf, that doesn't stop us. We just put the powder directly into the meatloaf.

The average Midwesterner is 17% ranch dressing by volume.

Ranch hasn't become a beverage yet, but it's still trying.

[stinglesswasp]

Overseas 🇺🇸

[artbyblastweave]

Elder Scrolls is fascinating to me because the vast majority of the background information of the setting is very obviously written by people with an admirably clear-eyed understanding of how history is mainly just groups genociding the shit out of each other before constructing post-hoc rationalizations of why that was a cool and good thing to do, if they bother justifying anything beyond the level of Might Makes Right. And then the actual main quest plots are often operating at Sword Hero Cleanses The Undesirables levels of These Are The Bad Guys, Kill Them Because We Said So

[ultramarinaa]

I hate this. I want to unsee it so desperately

I have witnesses I drew my jmart doodle before that episode aired…

I AM GOING TO DESTROY SOMEONE I HATE HOW SIMILAR THOSE ARE SIDE BY SIDE

EVEN THR COLORS OH MY GOD.

[civetside]

has anybody done this yet

[mellosdrawings]

Do you think in the N2 Squad, Jamil will just randomly get a burst of confidence and flirt with Leona and Vil, just for them to turn it around on him and he then gets so flustered he enters Caterpillar Mode™️ (pulls his hood over his face) for a solid hour?

I kept this one in my asks for a long time coz, while I thought it was a good ask and wanted to draw something for it, I am also plagued with the terrible curse of being both aromantic and autistic and struggling a lot with the very concept of ~*flirting*~

So first, gonna thank @aria-faye and @the-fab-fox for their insights and having the patience to explain to me the big strokes of flirting.

And now, I'm gonna quote aria-faye word for word cause he explained Jamil's flirting perfectly well in my opinion :

"I feel like Jamil is just... bad at flirting. He can tease and joke and all that, but when he's doing it with the intention of flirtation, i feel like he stumbles. His version of intentional flirting would probably be just... being overly straightforward. Saying what he's thinking for once."

"I feel like Jamil isn't very charismatic when it comes to flirting, so he isn't saying it [compliments] in any sort of way. Just pointing out a fact, which, to him, is flirting. Because it's not something he'd normally say aloud."

"Here's the thing: I think if they played the flirting game, and if Jamil said something intentionally over-the-top, teasing flirtatious, they [Leona and Vil] would match his energy and do it right back. BUT Jamil would be equipped to volley that back over and over. It's not flirtation that gets him. There's an element of disingenuous in flirting. It's all exaggerated, a bit untrue. It's an act - a mutually agreed-upon act that everyone in the group enjoys, but an act nonetheless. And Jamil is EXCELLENT at acts. He's no blushing flower when it comes to flirting. He would take that stuff all the way to bed if that's where it led him. But compliments? He has no idea how to take compliments. He has such a low opinion of himself for so long that he never learned. Compliments are what make him blush. Not flirting."

"Like, Leona could be like 'Damn Baby, what does that tongue do?' And Jamil would immediately respond by purring 'Come here and find out.' But Leona being like 'You look beautiful today' would have Jamil like "Oh, um. *blushes, pulls hood over his head* Thanks, I guess.'"

"I think something else that would get him flustered is physical affection. Like he gets all hyped up to shakily hold their hands, and they immediately respond by kissing his cheeks and being sweet to him. That would make him blushy too."

"Flirting is basically just manipulation. Jamil knows how to do that. He's really good at that. It might surprise him at first, but if he's the one initiating, he wouldn't do it unless he knew exactly what he was doing. Flirting for real is kind of fake. A teasing dance you do to get to a more intimate set of behaviors. And Jamil is great at this kind of thing. There are a thousand ways to make him blushy if he's not initiating. But if he's initiating, that implies a level of confidence, so the options for making him blushy circles right back around to honesty."

"Leona and Vil flirt by antagonising each other, so it might take them a second to realize that whenever Jamil drops an Honesty Bomb on them like this and speaks plainly, he's flirting. But once they know, Jamil will never know peace again, because they turn it right back on him and compliment him honestly until he's curled up and hiding in his hood and begging them to stop."

(Yes we had a very long discussion about it x))

[collidedscope]

there is a spectrum of ttrpg players. on one side is liam “i’m a martial class, so am i aware of what it looks like when someone casts a spell?” o’brien. and on the other end is ally “what do you mean a 14 acrobatics roll and a dance ribbon isn’t enough for me gain the ability of flight?” beardsley.

[sainteclectic]

in one ear and out the other with this guy. guess you'll just have to be a reluctant god, whole!

[wintvies]

my alone time is above everything else

[sp1resong]

mspaint soul ocd compilation (some serious, some nonsensical, some both, some neither)

[unhinged-snake-jaw]

patroclus in tsoa:

oh... i accidentally killed sarpedon??? i'm not built for violence, really. that's achilles. i guess he's always protecting me... i love him, i can't make myself argue with him— i'm so in love with him i don't know to be angry at him. ever.

patroclus in the iliad:

*invents gamer's rage by killing clysonysmus*

{kill count: so high that homer's just listing names at one point}

*kills sarpedon and then KILLS ANYBODY WHO TRIES TO TAKE HIS BODY* (the dead man's father ended up intervening i believe)

"hey patroclus... you're crying like a girl what's wrong??" "what's wrong? what's wrong??? what's wrong is yOU MOTHERFU—"

*knocks hector's charioteer onto the floor with a stone that fucking kills him* 10/10 my guy that was a perfect dive!! trojans seem awfully good at diving out of their chariots, don't you think??

"on my own? i would have killed TWENTY hectors, and you know that."

[askblueandviolet]

Lan do you use a lint roller for Macaques fur? How many do you go through a day . . .

MASTER POST

Asks Start 💙💜

Previous 💙

Next 💙💜

[laurrelise]

just discovered that while i was contemplating watching house md my parents have been fans of it for years and my dad rewatches it all the time

im in actual shock because the reason i would’ve wanted to watch it is for the characters and the possibly non straight (?) relationship between wilson and house and my parents are scared of gay relationships

so i guess the queer coding of the show kinda flew over their heads a bit

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

Wreck it Ralph fanart?? In 2024? More likely than you think....

I get way too insane about kids' movies, and I've been on a nostalgia binge watch lately, so here's a villain/hero swap AU

Does anyone even remember this movie??

[catvampire]

i love how the cvn fandom is just like. "olrox is a possessive selfish obsessive person. also he deserves better than mizrak. i hope they continue to fuck about it"

10/10 character writing

[suffarustuffaru]

the three idiots banter at the end of arc 9 ch6 had me sweating bc im so sure ottos internal dialogue was Very Different from subarus LMFAOOO