#cause i wasnt stressed enough before this

[nuclear-cowboy]

As if my work week wasn't bad enough. Bam! Ear infection and no sleep idiot

[deepwoundsandfadedscars]

Sat down to have a chat with my cousin before he flies home tomorrow to his wife, just cause I was anxious that she would try to twist it against me if she talked to him first, I explained my side of what the interaction was and the blatant lies she claimed, and he's not at all surprised and in fact is already planning on getting a paralegal when he gets home to start getting her the fuck out of his life

Me last night: hmm maybe I want another tattoo, I'm going to start talking to this artist *sends message*

My cousins wife: *sends an incredibly hostile message about how I've been ignoring her and she's gone above and beyond for me trying to be supportive of me, when in reality she hasn't texted me first since November and when I text her, she's very short with me and makes no effort to continue a conversation with me*

"Yeah hi, artist? Make that three tattoos"

[myfandomrealitea]

Your post regarding specifc places for things and some places dont need a vent channel it helped me realise that the people i follow online were damaging to my health. They were constantly sharing real people who died horrifically and saying things like "if you dont share you're supporting violence " while i only joined social media to view art.

I actively speak about real life events offline with my family, we always talk about whats happening in the world once a week and mention anything new within the local and worldwide news. I didn't understand why social media was worsening my mental health around these topics since i could speak about it in real life with my family. i assumed i was horrible for simply not wanting to see it online, When your post about a safe space came up i realised why it made me feel so bad, the artists i followed no longer were posting art and were just constantly sharing news daily about horrific events. It became inescapable and i was unknownly doomscrolling for hours on social media while hoping to see art (that just made me feel bad viewing after seeing so much death) , my only escape was going offline. I already made new accounts just for art and Im so thankful for your post since i did avoid everything that was about real world events since the account is only for art and i feel so much more.. i guess happier.. but definitely more mentally healthy if that makes sense? It felt like my mind was drained or foggy when scrolling through social media, and i wasnt actually paying attention before but now its a lot more, clear, healthy and positive. Im able to think properly and actually pay attention and appreciate the good things online

I'm so glad I was able to help you on your journey to bettering your wellbeing. Its an aspect of why I run this blog and talk about the things that I do.

So very often people don't actually register or realize what parts of their lives are causing stress. They attribute it to 'working too much' or 'not sleeping enough' without realizing that there are direct causes for things like not sleeping enough. And I'm not saying every single part of life comes back to activism, but very often we don't even realize how much negativity and forced awareness we're exposing ourselves to.

I used to religiously follow accounts on Instagram which posted about animal abuse. Other than a handful of celebrities my Instagram feed would be the most graphic videos you could imagine of people hacking into live dogs with axes, boiling cats alive in huge vats of water, jockeys tearing at horse's mouths until their teeth were loose and they were leaving a trail of blood as they walked the winner's circle.

I used to think if I wasn't constantly forcing myself to acknowledge that these things were happening, if I wasn't constantly reminding myself the extent at which these things happen, I was a bad person. I wasn't a real animal lover. If I truly loved animals why wasn't I sharing these videos? Why wasn't I sitting there with thousands of other people acknowledging what animals go through while I sit comfy at home doing nothing?

It got the point where I'd be throwing up constantly, I refused to sleep because I was terrified of the nightmares and my hands would shake as I opened up the Instagram app because I dreaded what I'd see today.

It wasn't helping me. It wasn't helping the animals. I'm just as aware now of what animals go through without having to see any of it.

But now, I have the wellbeing to actually devote myself to meaningful activism. Not just tormenting myself to no outcome. Now, I have the willpower and the energy to sign petitions and do research and take steps in my own life to better the welfare of the animals in my care.

Now I can sleep at night and wake up well-rested with the energy and the motivation to do things both for myself and for other people. Now, I can scroll Instagram and leave polite, correctional comments on misguided videos about animals. Now I have the knowledge to devote my attention and my efforts to where it actually makes a difference and changes animal's lives.

It is such, such a hard thing to drag yourself out of. We're so conditioned into thinking suffering shared is suffering lessened. We're so conditioned into believing that by spamming words anywhere we can we are the direct cause of change.

Its a hell of a learning climb. A steep one. But I genuinely believe the world would be better off for learning and changing as we both had the courage to.

[kurosstuff]

✨Vampire Sera x GNreader x Vampire Lute✨ I want it

Headcanons this time around~ and fluff with a HINT of angst~♡

Kinda short this time around♡

Warning(s): blood drinking, fluff, jealousy (?) Slight spice? Two small drabbles

Vampire sera x GN!reader x Vampire lute: headcanons

Having two vampire lovers while being a human wasn't always easy.

Especially if one just so happened to be hungry- thats when it wasn't the greatest. Especially since both are addicted to your blood.

Lute. When she drank from you? Wasnt always nice nor gentle. Cause unlike Sera. She can't be gentle. Bruises always from Lute- who didn't mean to but she did try.

She does know her strength knows what she csn do if not careful but she tries

"Quit moving~" Lute snarled out, holding your waist in a bruising hold you just knew was gonna hurt for days

"ok, ok- I'm sorry" you huffed out, tilting your head for her to chomp down on gasping as she fed clinging to her shoulders tightly tearfully at the stinging pain you felt "lute.. gentle~" you gasped out, feeling her Claws digging into your skin breaking it almost as if wanting to shred you

Once lute got feral- all blood thirsty for your blood Sera needs to step in. Or she'll drink you dry

Not like you mind

Each time it happens Lute hides. Refusing to see you go anywhere near you. No matter where you look you never can find her.

Sera knows, but she also knows lute needs to forgive herself first. Before she can go to their Mate again. Sera is annoyed given how often she's reminded her thst their mate is a human. A fragile human.

But when lute does come around you forgive her like always knowing she didn't truly mean too. She'll hold you close kissing any marks she left on you as gently as she can.

Now? Sera stays in the room as she feeds.

Sera, on the other hand? Is gentle. Rarely losing herself- always taking your hand whispering softly to you. Praising you.

Just being soft as she pulls you in her lap cooing before she drinks.

Unlike Lutes, it doesn't feel like she's trying to drain you. To eat you. She's as gentle as possible like a small prick if anything given how gently she bites to drink.

But there's days she's too thirsty.

Hungry

That's when you need to worry.

Seeing Sera stare you in your doorway. Like a predator, and you're her prey. You gulped knowing what was gonna happen. Covering your neck- your warnings and concerns falling on deaf ears as she pins you, kissing you roughly before biting you harshly holding you close as she gets her full.

So gone she didn't hear your cries. Or lutes yells before she was ripped away as lute screamed trying to cover your bloody neck sobbing as she drank way to much.

That made her snap out of it. Seeing your fear on your face

That was the first time and last time Sera ever lost control enough. She almost killed you. Never again will she allow it to happen.

To see your fear. Of her.

But not everything is stressful. There's romantic days where you show them modern stuff and have fun with that

Aka pranking them every now and again

You learned the hard way lute. Doesn't understand jokes at all. And to never prank or joke with much stuff with her.

Sera gets it and laughs(cause of Emily) but she prefers to keep it on the rare occasions

Both ladies insist on you sleeping in between them when it's time to sleep no matter what.

"To protect you!" - lute(she just wants to steal your warmth as well)

Now- when it comes to their bat forms?(and any other animal they decide to be)

Free hugs/cuddles. And they know it. How eager and happy you are to love up on them

Both ladies adore it-

Even going as far as turning back to tease you. Each time it works.

Lute does that a lot mire then Sera does- who prefer you to be happy and if that meant her being in one of her animal forms? Then so be it

[sunbedo]

Hey guys, just finished Fantasy High Junior Year. Crying and screaming forever first of all. I take everything back abt Squeem, Squeem is great. I take back nothing abt Porter he still sucks severely. Gorgug Thistlespring you will always be famous and i love you with all my heart. Very glad the Rat Grinders got revived they have so much potential as characters and i honestly kinda love them, and it wasn't explicitly stated if Kipperlilly was or not but i hope she's getting some therapy from someone other than Jawbone. I love you so so much forever the Bad Kids

Hey guys. Started to watch Fantasy High Junior Year. First thought was: who the fuck is Squeem. Next thought, cause I'm on episode 3, Porter sucks and I want to punch him

[voidbeau]

-+-+- Argos and Mr. Flower headcannons! -+-+-

---

I mentioned before that I like thinking that these two have a lot of similarities.

Not just in their issues though, but I also like to think they share a lot of similarities in their day to day lives as well and I thought it would be fun to compare and contrast how I see them!

Obviously I'll be comparing my own take on Mr. Flower with my Argos headcannons lol.

---

We know Argos is a busy guy. He's got a a lot of jobs and he's got his hobbies.

I like to think Mr. Flower is similar in that he bounces around between jobs at times too.

The difference is organization.

While I don't think Argos is without his methods for keeping things in check, I always get the impression Argos probably overlooks things, overbooks sometimes and is generally looser about his organization methods than even he would like.

But regardless, he makes things work and has a system all his own that's kept him going for years despite the fact that others might see Argos as disorganized in that regard.

Mr. Flower on the other hand always came off to me as a strict schedule keeper.

Lists, reminders and timers galore.

He's always checking and double checking ahead of time to make sure he's never taking on more shifts or tasks he can't neatly pack into his calender, along with whatever other routines he might have.

The funny part is, while Argos' more lax methods keep him on his toes, he kinda thrives off it, while I imagine all of Mr. Flower's strict schedule keeping kind of adds to his stress.

I can see him obsessively checking things to make absolutely sure he's remembered dates and times right and even though he's consistently punctual and is always seen as reliable by coworkers, Mr. Flower is always afraid he's somehow misremembered something.

He'd hate to disappoint anyone or cause trouble.

I like to think that for both him and Argos, keeping so busy is just how they best function in some way, but also because it helps keep the thoughts ™️ at bay.

---

Both are definitely tea drinkers!

Helps calm the nerves and also helps with all the pesky insomnia brought on by bad thoughts and haunting memories.

And also just from the general stresses of life.

Being that busy all the time can leave ones nerves a bit frazzled even for the most energetic of people!

We know Argos' affinity for plants and his green thumb?

He must also be pretty good at maintaining those plants he finds to the best of his ability when he brings them home!

I like to think Mr. Flower isn't that great at it himself- or just isn't that interested, but he tends to his little garden of herbs and spices and has various flowers that can be made into teas. Very common things like chamomile.

Meanwhile I like to think Argos finds more exotic flowers and plants for tea making that he's read up on or heard can only be found in certain voids during very specific times.

Hard to grow outside their respective voids but he's able to collect enough to keep quite a collection of bizarre but welcoming flavours at home!

---

We've seen Argos' uhm- *interest* in photography and we've seen he does some painting as well!

I love thinking Argos has a very artsy side he likes to indulge, even if majority of the time he only gets to paint with the kids when he's scheduling activities for them.

I like to think Mr. Flower is a great sketch artist.

As a child he'd always been interested in art but never had the opportunity to explore it or wasnt even really given the opportunity to entertain the thought of it much.

But he did occasionally find time in between classes, tutoring and all of his mother's other insisted after school activities to sketch and doodle for fun.

A hobbie he enthusiastically indulged in more when he was finally able to leave home to be on his own.

---

Stargazing and cloud-watching???

I think both of these guys find the time to enjoy the skies in some way.

Whether it's Argos counting and admiring the stars, either alone or with Mr. Plant or if it's Mr. Flower idly staring out the windows at work, picking out shapes in the clouds or admiring how slowly and carefree they float by.

I like to think he and Mr. Plant just kind of picked a hill to lay on one days and just quietly stared and watched the clouds roll by.

Mr. Flower really came to appreciate cloud watching.

And maybe clouds in general.

No rush to be anywhere and no specific way they needed to be.

Just fluffy, amorphous puffs in the air traveling wherever the wind takes them.

How nice that must be.

---

I like to think both Argos and Mr. Flower have trouble sleeping at night as I've mentioned.

Tea of course helps, reading books or going out for late night walks even.

Or in some cases, one might take late night secret ventures into anothers' void for photos.

Whatever helps get them their much needed sleep!

Because both are consistently busy and often working with less than the requisite amount of rest, I think that like Argos, Mr. Flower has pretty prominent eyebags as well.

The difference being that he is a consistent concealer user as part of any skin/petalcare routine he has.

While Argos also uses concealer from time to time, he's never been able to keep up with his own routines as much as he'd like to.

He has a before bed skin and eyecare routine but often times he has only enough time in the mornings to barely shower and choke down a fruit or piece of toast before he's dashing out his front door.

---

Argos seems to enjoy company and probably a little bit of attention.

We've seen him star in commercials and appear in magazines and has likely garnered some notoriety, at least in his little corner of the void.

Obviously though, any large amount of attention has its downsides and I'm sure Argos has had to deal with a creep or two as well as potential nasty rumors.

Nothing he can't get to the bottom of and cut out at the root though.

After that, Argos is fairly good at handling something of a public image.

He's done so much good for other creature's of the Void after all, who could possibly believe any awful hearsay about the ever happy, good Samaritan, sweet little Argos after all?

Certainly he'd be the last creature in the Void to be involved with awful accusations of stalking and alleged acts of violence and vandalism?

Argos has worked so hard to get away and find and maintain a peaceful way of living. He has no intentions of letting anything get in the way now. Not this time.

Mr. Flower on the other hand is great at dodging attention altogether.

He keeps to himself and goes mostly unnoticed by the general public and prefers it that way.

While he likes to mingle and socialize from time to time, he has a very tiny circle of coworkers and an even tinier circle of friends he likes to stick to and be involved with.

Mr. Flower is incredibly strict about who he lets into his life.

Even his friends have a very limited understanding of Mr. Flower's life and again, this is how Mr. Flower prefers things.

In turn though, Mr. Flower often doesn't let himself get too deeply involved with others either.

He has a base understanding of friends and, as I've mentioned previously, mostly keeps people at an arms length away.

Just close enough to get along with but not too close that they're learning more than they need to.

And certainly not close enough to grow any unnecessary attachments.

It may seem cold and a little rude when Mr. Flower shuts down any attempts to reach out, but it becomes excusable when people take in his sweet smile, supposed friendly demeanor and ability to stay on top of tasks and lend a hand to so many others.

Mr. Flower often goes above and beyond in the work place.

Even if it's just to keep up an image.

Afterall, Mr. Flower has worked hard to find and maintain a peaceful way of living, and he's not about to let anything get in the way of it.

Not this time.

---

I think Argos wishes he were more in control of things while Mr. Flower feels like if he isn't in control of things, he's risking everything.

And anything that doesn't feel like it's in his control or something he knows he can't control, he avoids it and somehow makes up for that loss of control some other way in his life.

Even if it isn't healthy.

Meanwhile Argos just kind steeps in the chaos of things. Less accepting of it and more like he thinks that's kind of all there is for him and the best he can do is mitigate the damage.

But it sure ad hell looks like he's fine with rolling with the punches. Heaven knows he's gotten good at it.

---

---

I really like thinking Argos and Mr. Fkower are almost a reflection of one another in a way. But one the other hates looking at, yet one side wants to draw it in and make peace with it while the other side wants nothing more than to never have to take a look again.

There are also other complicated feelings involved that I want to get into at some point as well, along with the clashing of morals and lifestyles.

Again , so much stuff I had reserved as part of fic ideas that will either collect dust as wips or take years for me to finish.

orz

I wanted to add some of this stuff with my previous half shitpost about "SMiLE" but it was late then and I was already on the verge of passing out so lmaooo.

I think this has gotten long enough thst its ended up deserving of its own post anyway tho.

Anyway I'm gonna go shovel food into my face now.

[clusterrune]

My Experience being diagnosed with bpd.

for me it was a relief to finaly have an answer, something to explain my thought process and behaviours, as well as confirmation for something i highly suspected.

the unfortunate thing is that i got diagnosed when i had a breakdown that scared me so bad i admitted myself to the psych ward behind my parents backs, having such a bad experience at the ward that being in that same hospital anywhere away from the er or first floor gives me panic attacks.

i went back to the er after my body shut down, my mom having to support me heavily as my body refused to cooperate and let me walk, they lent me a wheelchair and i was stuck in the er overnight till the afternoon the next day. when they finally got us in and did tests on me they couldn't see what was wrong physically but saw i had a bpd diagnosis so the psychiatrist there sat me down with my mom, gave us a booklet on bpd and told us it must have just been such intense stress from my bpd symptoms that my body couldnt take it.

i always thought it would be something like my spine defect to cause me a complete loss of mobility but knowing now that if i dont regularly take medication to manage my bpd and stress levels my body will decide on its own its had enough and stop responding.

losing my mobility slowly was scary enough, bpd symptoms giving me episodes of full immobility was terrifying. while im glad i had an explanation for it, i still wish they'd properly told me about the bpd diagnosis before when i was there self admited.

had i known any time earlier, i would have been able to better set boundaries and look after myself, recognize what didnt help me and what my symptoms and behaviours were and prevent such terrifying episodes from ever happening.

it was a relief when the psychiatrist i saw at the ward mentioned it off hand because i had suspected it already and that confirmation made my concerns feel even slightly validated. that was probably the only positive that came from that visit.

it wasnt what started my research on bpd but it sure as hell influenced me delving way deeper into it, and after one too many bad stressors and reactions to stress, i am still trying to do more research to help myself and others cope better and better understand ourselves.

hopefully my book "understanding borderlines" can do that.

[clockeyedtoy]

So disgusting how this fandom dogpiles on ppl like tomb n many others who have spoken out abt the bullying n ableism angelwowings/tulip and outkast has done against them, but ignores the real ableism happening. U guys were so quick to turn on tomb for lacking empathy, yet u support ppl who have openly n repeatedly emotionally abused ppl w mental health issues. How quickly u guys believed lies abt tomb how hes an abuser, nazi, ableist, etc while supporting the same people who MANY mentally ill ppl have spoke out against.

Tomb took responsibility for his actions. Tulip is doing nothing but lie n avoid accountability. U didnt let tomb breathe after 5 months of constantly stalking n harassing him w obsessive behaviour towards him, u insulted ppl dealing with paranoia, bpd, npd, u dehumanized and insulted those who lack empathy. Learn from n own up to ur mistakes. U dont get a free pass after all the harm u've caused.

We have literally been given proof from her old associate that tulip didnt gaf abt the real issues w/ tomb or actually wanting to see improvements, she was freakishly obsessed w deplatforming him n causing drama. Tomb has improved. N even if he hasnt, mentally ill ppl do NOT fucking owe u recovery or to be fucking consumable! U wouldn't shame a schizophrenic person for having delusions or a borderline for having mood swings? This is so disgusting to see ppl jump on the bandwagon n then turn a blind eye when multiple ppl have come out abt tulip and outkasts current n genuine ableism. It wasnt js a one-off or jokes in bad taste.

And for everyone who blindly believed cropped screenshots, twisted context, n straight up lies, shame on u. Go ahead pick ur sides but we can all see how u react in the face of the same mental health issues u guys love to romanticize in the creepypasta characters. Do better.

And before anyone says shit, yea we tried to "talk it out" but get over urself. U cant "talk out" rampant ableism w ppl who dont gaf abt u or ppl like u. Tomb is kindhearted forgiving and mature enough to talk it out but tulip only made her friend act like a messenger to avoid responsibility.

[fictionfixations]

playful land (part 2)

contains spoiler for the movie pinocchio so and like book 7 spoilers (its literally just 2 words relating to lilia and its a card that exists)

😭 as a glasses wearer i can relate. when i didnt have my glasses id squint a lot but the people around me just thought i had my eyes closed so they thought i wasnt paying attention D:

its even crazier to think that lilia, a war veteran and everything was legitimately stressed over this 💀 but to be fair if grim was in danger of getting out of like the seats that lilia had to hold him back id be panicking too cause who knows what could happen

heres your reminder that vil was kinda baby (well child but thats still baby to me) when being in the industry and considered good at playing the villain even though children (and teenagers) are literally known for changing, are in the prime time of their life to change and experiment and try different things theyve never done before and so typecast him is literally to stunt his growth and potential !!! and remember there were those kids who thought vil was an actual villain and like tried to attack him or some shit so he did play villains when he was younger. and it probably really hit him hard because kids dont (and shouldnt) be hit with the reality that not everyone is nice and that people can be out to get you for no reason other than 'you exist' and will run with any reason they can to hate on you even if its entirely fake and they dont even know you but they just think youre a bad person despite the truth and theres nothing you can do to change that because they dont want to be wrong. if you cant tell i have a lot of things against it. like. like child prodigies n celebrities are great good for you for being good at something and being recognized for it, but ohh my god its like suddenly they're an adult and cant make mistakes without people condemning them even though literally everyone has made mistakes before and children dont know any better until they do it and mess up and thats okay and i just. i just want vil to be ok cause hes still really young.

the text being like pLAcehOldeR TExT PLaCeHoLDer TeXt is so fucking creepy for the puppets 😭 why cant it just be normal like when like AIs or like the systems of shit talk (like like the navi system that was normal?? and i thought the voices for the rollercoaster was normal too but i mightve just not noticed considering im playing it right as the update came out and i havent slept yet so yippee)

JIMINY CRICKET IS THAT YOU 💀

the way i missed all these references the first time but now im actually getting them cause i saw the movie

heres where i say i already forgot like a part of the middle of the movie and what happened and why. i was watching it with friends so i got distracted trying to talk to them and im really bad at multitasking when trying to watch something (like reallly pay attention) and talk to someone at the same time so i forget one or the other and i forgot the movie so i dont remember what the apple core was about but i doubt it was good intentioned

i know that leona's older than them but i still like that he calls them kids like d'aww

flashbacks to kalim mentioning he didnt know how to pay for things or how cash registers worked and stuff like that cause usually merchants came to him also him mentioning he got like lint rollers for the carpet but he just kept buying new ones when he ran out instead of buying a new roll, and when being informed that he could buy a new roll instead of an entirely new roller he just called whoever thought of that a genius 😭 his obliviousness is genuinely harmful to him no matter how good intentioned someone may be to try to spoil him and make him live the most comfortable life ever because theres so much life experiences hes lacking. and theres so much i could say about this but ive yapped enough about this in other posts and ive also already yapped about vil so um

HES LICKING THEM BECAUSE OF THE OVERBLOT STONES ISNT HE? ???? ????? GRim PLEASE

…hes got a tail because he went to pleasure island and was slowly turning into a donkey like i mean i guess i can understand because in twst the stories were twisted so both the hero and the villain got a happy ending technically? like remember i think jasmine married like 'a street rat' or something (I cant remember exactly? maybe he was like a thief but changed his ways?), while jafar caught someone who was pretending to be a prince to marry her (described as two different people btw)

THIS. THIS IS WHAT I MEAN. he is so unaware that hes going to make dumb and insensitive comments that could definitely offend someone but he doesnt understand what the problem with it is this boy is like the heir right?? someone please teach him politics and like diplomacy shit ???? like ok you want him to have the best life. his best life is not making mistakes in front of important people that can fuck things up without him realizing and ruining relationships because HE DOESNT KNOW BETTER. like theres only so long you can baby someone and i know hes baby and still young but stop coddling him. like i mean i want to coddle him i want to wrap him in bubble wrap but like come on. and i know hes smart, he knows people arent the best because people have tried to poison him and tried to kill him (even some of his family have tried) but come on. like what if he comes off as insincere? as a person who couldnt possibly understand? HE ALREADY DOES COME OFF AS THAT HAVE YOU SEEN JAMIL?? and you know what thats gonna breed? RESENTMENT. aAAAAAAa AND PEOPLE ARE GONNA TAKE ADVANTAGE OF HIM BECAUSE HE WANTS TO SEE THE GOOD IN EVERYONE EVEN THE PEOPLE WHO DO BAD SHIT TO HIM AND ITS JUST. i dont want him to be hurt and hes gonna get hurt and he already has been hurt and hes still managing and i feel so bad for him and i just. ..you can tell i have a lot of feelings over thsi fhaidwsuiahfd

d'aww hes hugging him 🥺

yknow kalim probably has the funds to get like a water breathing potion and explore underwater like i mean tbh it kinda scares me. wasnt there that story during like one of the halloween events one of the leech twins mentioning how they saw like one of them?? except it wasnt them. and that like people went missing or some shit??? the coral sea (..that might not be the name i forgor) has its own dangers i hope he stays safe during so

wouldnt it be the coolest for a hometown event with the leech twins and azul and kalim is there actually i wonder what kinda outfits they'd wear. also in caters birthday bloom vignette floyd mentioned that he could take cater to the coral sea and show him places land people dont really get to see (then warns him to watch out for shark attacks) to which cater replies that he'll pass. …still i think itd be really cool for him to go too. maybe we could make it a pop music club trip! has lilia been to the coral sea? i cant remember 🤔 i dont think caters phone is waterproof though (hes also mentioned it in that vignette) and hes mentioned it in this event where he was scared his phone would get waterlogged during the whale rollercoaster cause they were getting drenched in water and he didnt get time to prepare

leona. you get me.

kalim just automatically being worried about poison makes me feel really bad for him cause he always has to be cautious like i know he doesnt say it but its implied and it makes me sad

FIGARO MY BELOVED I LOVE YOU SO MUCH YOU PRECIOUS BABY AHFDASUDIHAIUDHW i love cats so much the moment he showed up on screen i just couldnt pay attention to anything that was happening in the movie and i just love the way he was animated he looked so fluffy and cute and i just wanted to pet him so fucking much aGHHHH

leona: I REFUSE to ride the carousel no matter what right after leona: on the carousel

so confirmed kalim does have a magicam acc huh

[buggybugkilo]

just thought abt this so half made thought thats actively developing while writing

theres seven dorms, so theres seven house wardens + seven deadly sins

and also seven overblots (which could change but ya never know) cause the whole thing with the 🔥deadly sin brothers🔥 (/ref) is that it can easily be a downfall thing/weakness (i think??) and that downfall being their overblots

i yearn to warn thee of my lack in knowledge and to take thy with a grain of salt (both in sky daddy knowledge and bc of how long its been since ive even looked at any of the chapters other then the recent one...)

greed: azul (the contracts often unfair) (though i could see an argument for lust for power)

sloth: leona (...i think cutting corners instead of working hard? bc of the potion?? i don't remember that chapter well enough...like..i think they get caught cheating..?)

envy: vil (his envy towards niege caused his overblot)

wrath: riddle(?)

honestly even after looking at this from a few perspectives i still have conflicting feelings- personal feelings say pride, logic says wrath

pride: not fully sure honestly

i have been going back and forth on this the entire half hour ive been thinking abt this- i think i can pin it down to idia or riddle though

gluttony: malleus

feel like this might be a hear me out...so hear me out- bc he put everyone into the dream shit that gives them their deepest desires (?) and all is that not gluttony to an extent? forced but nonetheless

along with stopping lillia from leaving bc *he* was scared

( kilo irl rant coming: which, valid- had a health scare with my very old dog recently and kept him with me in my room for multiple nights until he was better despite the fact our other dog was howling keeping everyone else up and probably stressing our other dog i refused to let him stay down there bc i was scared of what would happen if i wasnt there next to him..it was selfish and keeping lillia from leaving was a selfish move ANYWAY)

lust: probably jamil (his lust for being head dorm/power)

not a whole lot of thoughts on this one honestly- before seeing if anyone had thought abt this i was thinking vil bc being overtly comfortable with most things considered fem beauty is often put with sexuality..i also forgot that envy exists though so. i feel like this is a pretty cut clean one in general though

thats all i got;w;

edit: upon looking i think there may have been more thought on it before

[dateamonster]

im suuuper intrigued by mikotos second trial song/audio drama. despite liking his first trial song i wasnt very into the character before because like. guy with DID whos alter is a murderer is such a shitty played out trope lmao. and like i still sorta feel thats true but i like that milgram is at least doing a half decent job subverting expectations with it.

i love john becoming more his own character, getting WAY more personality than i thought theyd allow him, and im especially fascinated with the implication that the reason or at least part of the reason for his development is because the stress of being ruled guilty in the first trial has led to john fronting much more than he usually would, so of the two of them he is much more like cognizant of the full situation. whether thats totally a good or bad thing i guess is still up to opinion but it does imo introduce the interesting idea that ruling someone guilty might have unexpected positives as well as negatives.

as always im prepared to be proven wrong, but my current theory is that john is lying to cover for mikoto. thats his role after all. he makes it clear in both the interrogation and the song that everything he does is for the sake of preserving mikotos wellbeing, which also seems in line with his behavior during the first trial. so i think mikoto did kill someone, and possibly the horror at what he had done is what caused john to emerge in the first place. even when mikoto is fronting he doesnt always seem the most... grounded. i dont think its a stretch to presume johns emergence couldve served the dual purpose of dissociating mikoto from the events of the murder and creating an apparently violent, rage-fueled alternate identity who could serve as the scapegoat for mikotos own actions and who was strong enough to manage the fallout.

after all, as has been established, its not actually john who is a prisoner in milgram, and while milgrams interpretation of what a "murderer" is can be a little shaky, everyone who has been chosen has been involved in a death of some form. since whatever forces dictate the experiment recognize mikoto and john as separate people, theres no reason mikoto would be imprisoned and john not if john were the sole culprit as he claims.

anyway banger song as always and i do begrudgingly have to hand it to em for making me this invested in this type of plotline. johns heartfelt desire to protect mikoto even knowing that if he does succeed mikoto might no longer have a use for him i felt was genuinely pretty touching, and the line where he wonders if it mightve been better if he had stayed purely as a "monster" really struck me. looking forward to seeing where it goes!

[chuuyascumsock]

Okay first of all HI i hope you’re having an amazing day so far and are hydrated and well rested,

Two,

I JUST SAW YOUR ‘MECHANIC CHUUYA DEFINITELY SAYS ATTA GIRL/BOY” POST AND AND AHHHH IM FROTHING IM BITING A RANDOM BUS SEAT IM BARKING IM DEAD

Imagineeee

You’re riding him in the back of his garage just after he’s closed up shop and as you fuck yourself dumb on his cock he slowly purrs put a “good girl(boy)” as he angles his hips so you’ll hit your sweet spot.

Oh and also

Imagine suckin him off after he’s had a stressful day at work (karens and kens can take a toll on the best of us✊😔) and you can practically feel him relax as you wrap your lips around his length,first taking in his tip and then as much as you can take without suffocating.and he tangles his hands in your hair guiding your movements and when he feels his release coming along he lets his head fall back as he lets out a low “good girl/boy~” before thrusting his hips just enough to hear you gag-

(I hope this wasnt too out of pocket😭)

(And could i please be 🧀 anon please?)

I hope you have a great day!!

The way my jaw just dropped—

ANON YOU HAD ME BLUSHING AND COVERING MY MOUTH, I HAD TO STEP AWAY FROM MY LAPTOP FOR A MINUTE—

You’re right— you’re absolutely right cause there’s no way Mechanic Chuuya would not do those things. ALSO IMAGINE—

Riding his mouth as he cups your ass to press your pussy/dick further against/in his mouth while calling you a pretty girl/boy and demanding you come on his tongue 🥳

Also— just thinking about him bending you over the hood of one of the cars he’s working on and fucking you stupid on his cock cause you were whining too much about how you needed him 😋

(I love that I’m getting reoccurring anons that I now get to have names for them— thank you for your contributing thoughts 🧀 Anon! Stay well hydrated and fed cause you certainly just served some major cunt with this post 😭)

[definitelynotshouting]

a thought. grian's described (in litd) getting blacklisted as a death sentence, and while a big part of that is probably his self loathing & his blacklisting induced desire to not go hang around idk hypixel or somewhere, if the bad end fic by scarabies is any indication grian's picked up some of watcher culture (enough to speak in galactic while under stress). he might've picked up the "leaving the group and not coming back is a drawn out suicide" idea. making a blacklisting an execution.

While me and Rabi's fics differ a bit in some aspects (i hadnt come up with a huge amount of lore when they posted their bad end fic), i do enjoy the idea of Grian knowing how to speak Galactic and sometimes reverting to that when extremely stressed. Theres also the matter of Watchers having different mouth parts than your typical Player, so Galactic i think is more suitable for that in particular!!!

Tbh, the reason it was a death sentence wasnt just because of the way the Watchers stressed interdependency (although thats DEFINITELY a factor). It had more to do with the logic of the situation: the hermits would likely tell the other life members, and Scott in particular knows a lot of people. It wouldn't be out of the question for him to keep an eye out for Grian, and get him preemptively blocked from high-traffic servers like Hypixel. And Grian wasn't in the position to disguise himself at that point, so he wrote it off as a lost cause before even trying, and stuck to the outer edges of the server cluster Hermitcraft S9 is located in.

[the-s1lly-corner]

So... your probably allergic to honey, your mouth is too small for your teeth, your skin sometimes eats itself and overgrows back, and I believe I vaguely recall you saying you have a newely exposed nerve in your tooth that you did not notice.... I need to study you because theres no way your human

Cracks my knuckles

Allow me to offer more info

1. I dont know if I'm actuallg allergic to honey, but I think it's odd that when I eat it in any form (in food, on food, straight up, raw honey, not raw honey, ect) it ALWAYS leaves me with a sore throat that's itchy and swollen for about a week. Mouth tingles as well... oddly enough I can handle having it on my skin which ig isnt too weird since I know some allergens only become dangerous when entering the body

2. My mouth is small because of genetics there isnt really anything to it, teeth are crammed in a little tighter but it (usually) doesnt hurt... I AM worried about when my wisdom teeth come in if they do... it already sounds like a nightmare but to have it happen when my teeth are already crushing together?? No thanks! I didnt even know teeth could shift after growing until my last baby tooth was pulled- not even just to close the gap but the adult tooth that was meant to be there slowly inches to the gap. It's still under my tongue but before it was nearly in the middle of my mouth. Now its pressed against the other teeth. Fucking insane

3. I have plaque psoriasis!! It sometimes flares up whenever- usually caused by stress or impact wounds (bumps, falls, hits, ect). Its been a while since I've had a full flare up and I hope it stays that way for a little while longer!!!

4. I've got bad bad teeth. Idk if theres anything going on or what but the AFAB folk in my family on my moms side have oddly brittle teeth... tooth got a cavity, rotted, cracked, and I wasnt taken to a dentist until YEARS after the initial cavity. Dentist was working on cleaning it up to put like... I forgot what it was but hes basically filling and glue to keep everything together until we figure out what to do long term. He says the rot went so deep that he could SEE the nerve under what was left. Oddly enough it wasn't as painful as I thought itd be- sure I'd have aches and be sensitive to temperatures but it was... like baby pain. I've had worse headaches than tooth pain soooooo make with that what you will: damaged nerves or I was insanely lucky

Theres probably more stuff but my brain is being goopy <\3

I am allergic to carrots though, holding them for a few minutes makes my hands really red and itchy for a few hours. Which is WEIRD because that never used to happen before when I'd eat baby carrots as a kindergartener. I know allergies can develop later in life so??? Maybe that's what it is??

[pinkyjulien]

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT Actually I'm going to share my fresh, sleep-deprived thoughts that I wrote yesterday- or more like, this morning gfhhgf bear with me cause I was loosing it :>

⚠ Heavy spoilers under read more!

As a heads up as to why the formating is all weird, this was sent to a friendo who worked on PL :3 Did a list of things that stuck to me in those 4-5 first hours right before falling asleep! I stoped at the little hideout with Myers, didn't met Reed or Kurt or MrHands or Anybody elses yet really 👁👄👁✋ taking my sweet time with it!

The start : I LOVED the glitchy holocall with songbird, it set the tone immediately

God walking up to the gate and seeing all those cars and npcs waiting to enter- THE BIT with the cops who cant go in ?? omg loved it, again its such a tiny thing that set the tone right up

Songbird introduction oh my goddddddd…. HGJG I love HER SHE'S SO COOL… When she was like "were going to crash so I woobled into your relic" I was???? Ok so How and What and What and What UH… Also I can see why people won't like her, already just cause she mute Johnny and isnt a Samurai fan fhdjbqg BUT I PERSONALLY REALLY LIKE IT

Dogtown itself???? Holyshit. Like, I remember dev saying that Night City itself was a character, the main character even, and they nailed it hardcore with Dogtown too- all of the civilians are fucking so memorable too??? how good the random crowd npcs look as well!! Its a glowup from vanilla and it shows (special kudos to the netrunner kid vendor, and the flame thrower elbow guy and his little dance ghdjs)

I wheezed when trying the AR googles HGKHQ

The crash : God. Even tho I knew what was going to happen, the amount of chills I had during that scene!! It reminded me of one of my favorite DLC from Mass Effect 3, Citadel, there is a scene where Shepard eat shit and fall through a big aquarium / building and is truly alone, hurt and all- gave me the same vibes of "the world is too big, too Much and I'm just one Guy" ??? It got me so hookt, god. ALSO THE TITLE POPING??? UUUGGGHHH. GOD.

Rush to the crash, the sneaking to the ship and getting Myers got me Alert and excited

Escorting Myers feels nice cause she's not useless, she knows how to handle herself (DUH!) but I mean her A.I as a NPC, I like that she also sneak attack on ennemies when you do, like Jackie did

Part I had struggle with was the Driving Myers to the Garage bits, was getting frustrated- I love driving in FPP but with this car, in those streets and in this stressful situation YUOOOCK it wasnt IT FHFJJG switched to TPP and managed after a few tries UwU

OK GOD. The museum- amazing visuals and lore crumbs ofc BUT THE CHIMERA???? HELLO???????? THEY FUCKING POPPED OFF. I havent felt this stressed on a boss battle in FOREVER! Funny enough it reminded me of my first time against Nefarious from Ratchet and clank 3, and its positive HKGJ I was a wee kid back then and its my favorite game from the ratchet serie (which is my favorite console serie tbh) and it made me so nostalgic of that time??? REALLY Comf, really challenging, I shat myself.

District itself is FUCKING INSANE. Of course, it looks amazing, the sound design, the VIBES- I thought everything was already done in night city, how much different nuance of CyberPunk can you do when you already have such a big city with such different districts?? but dogtown is so different and yet fit perfectly

I LOVE. THE. NOMAD DIALOGUE OPTIONS… One of my big "fear" was being left out of the fun cause yeah Nomads really just have the badlands kinda hfjdjg but!!! I already been fed from the few choices I had, especially the one when cutting out the tracker from Myers neck, mentioning the uhh ritual thing, I was !!!!!!! AAAAAH FOOD FOR THOUGHTS AND ROTS I LOVE IT

talking about Nomads I LOVE THE DIVERSITY in the new garments!! Had a lot of corpo and barghest armor loot at the start, so I didnt expected to see some cool denim harnesses, practical jeans and worker gears OwO Excited to see more cause AZHHHGFH

[veys-mood-of-mentalbreakdown]

Aaaaalright i feel like this would probably be perfect for r/amitheasshole but i couldnt be bothered to put it on reddit. But I’ll formulate it like i would if i posted it there (EDIT: tried to post it to r/AITA but it wouldnt let me cuz its over 3000 characters)

Am i the asshole for wanting to tell a birthday party guest to not come anymore

This weekend March 11th 2023 the body will be 19 years old, to celebrate this we’re having our first actual birthday party with friends. We’ve invited 5 friends and all of them are coming some of them also sleep over as they come from far. Including the person id love to tell that they arent welcome anymore, we’ll call this person K.

As i said before this is the first time we ever thrown a party, so we are understandably stressed to get everything perfect. We don’t ask for help of the guest because we want to get it all ready ourselves (which as of now we have succeeded in and almost have everything ready).

K from day one started complaining about everything and anything. First it was about alcohol. About if we had vodka, and if we had different vodka than a certain brand because they only like that kind of stuff. Then it was about food, constantly making a problem about the snacks ans foods we were getting, i would share screenshots but i cant for privacy reasons so i’ll put it down as a list

- will there be enough food?

Yes there will be enough food

- will it be cold or warm, we only like to have warm food for dinner

We will make sure there will be cold and warm foods and foods you can eat both cold and warm

- yea but will there be enough

Yes there will be enough

- snacks dont sound like food to me

We call it snacks because we’re going to get tapas like dishes, meaning many different kinds of food

- will there be enough??

Yes K there will be enough

- i just dont have a right feeling about this

About what? The party or the food?

- the food at the party, i have a bad gut feeling about this

She then also started getting upset about the people we invited to our birthday party and the fact some of them are system’s like us (she is fully aware we are a system) saying that she thinks it’s going to be too much to handle, which i can get, i just don’t understand why she didnt tell us up front and said she wasnt going to come instead of getting angry at us for it.

She then said it would be a rollercoaster of emotions for her, and wanted to have a moment where she could just talk to our host privately about her emotional baggage at our host’s birthday party, and ofcourse like the good friend our host is, he agreed to play therapist because he’s afraid she’ll leave and bitch about him to others.

We made a playlist for music for the party, inviting everyone that will come to add music so theres a bit of everyone’s music tastes, we asked if everyone could add party vibe music and asked to not add music sorts that are triggering to us or others coming to the party (we specified what triggers us and asked everyone to specify if they have any music that can be negatively triggering)

Full knowing this, K asked us if she can add Reggae and added a few too, knowing full well that this is one of the things that is highly triggering to our host as one of the big ab*sers in our life only ever listened to that stuff, they got upset when we told them rather not and then our host said “okay but not too many, 1 or 2” to satisfy her, knowing it would most likely cause flashbacks of some sort. She then said “you know what its your party” and deleted it from thw playlist under the condition that she gets to have moments at the party where she can listen to her own music, which fine by us ig.

She then said she wasnt sure if she was going to come after all because of all the things she spoke about before that made her feel uncomfortable and feel it might be too much for her weren’t fixed. So we said alright.

Then she said she knew it would be too much for her and said she was going to come later.

I really want to tell her in a polite manner that she needs to fuck off and isnt welcome anymore at the party, she single handedly made the pressure and stress so high and blames us for it when we told her we were handling it and it was stressing us out.

After which she also said “im sorry, i feel like im too much in our business”

So are we (am i personally) the asshole for wanting to tell her she no longer is welcome?