#but who clearly had (despite everything) similar experiences and feelings to me

[yo9urt]

in other news i started reading l0u sull!van (avoiding search results) 's diaries today and its been very <3

[paintbrushnebula]

Just now realized that we're gonna get to see what Gwen intentionally *trying* to flirt looks like

bc like the few times when she said really sentimental things to Miles in ATSV weren't her intending to be romantic. Like the part where she said "What I always think: You're Amazing" was the most affectionate thing she's said to Miles so far, but that was her being unusually candid out of the heavy emotion she was feeling at that moment, not genuine flirting (at least not to her).

But if she's gonna be trying to make up with Miles and maybe doing some mmhmmhmm rizzing...

And I just think that will be Very Funny to watch.

Because you see the thing with Gwen is that she's not used to being open and vulnerable, so she isn't used to just saying how she feels about someone. I think that's why her love language is physical touch.

This is probably totally me projecting, but I always interpreted that physical touch is Gwen's default way of showing affection because expressing affection with words is much more difficult for her to do. It's like her way of expressing love where words fail her. It's kinda all she thinks she's capable of giving.

(Anyone who knows me knows I'm rather touchy too. With my siblings, parents, family, etc. It's always kisses, hugs, gentle arm squeezes, all that. So I relate to this aspect of Gwen's character a lot)

But obviously, physical affection isn't enough anymore. It's cute and highly appreciated, but it won't reveal everything that lies in the heart, or explain what she believes. It's pretty clear by the end of atsv that Miles will need some words from her. Some good words.

Now what's funny to me about Gwen's rizzing potential is that we've seen what it looks like when Gwen is trying to impress someone without knowing how good her chances are. She tried to make a good impression with Miles' parents, but got really awkward and cringed at herself after every attempt at banter or friendly conversation. This was different from how she interacts with the people at the Spider Society because superheroing is her element. It's something she knows she's good at, so there's no self doubt. But Gwen's a fish out of water in domestic situations. I mean, think about the scene where Gwen invites Miles for a swing around New York. The scene that follows very clearly resembles a date, despite the fact that it's not what Gwen meant when she called him out of his window. I think that Gwen had thought about how this could've looked like she was asking him out, then proceeding to shut down any thoughts like that, denying herself that they were on a date, despite that that might've been where her mind had been. Sidebar, I headcanon that during that scene, Miles did allow himself to pretend they were on a date. But anyway, this moment still has Gwen in her element because she's calling him out to swing around the city as spider-woman. It's certainly not the same as asking to casually hang out in civilian clothes to grab a bite or whatever, which would've been much more domestic, which would've been much more difficult for Gwen to attempt at. Gwen knows what the odds are when she's Spider-Woman, but she doesn't know the odds when she's Gwen Stacy.

Gwen not knowing the odds of something working out is what actively keeps her down throughout ATSV before she returns home. She acted with pessimism, and if the chances weren't high, she didnt want to commit herself to trying something that might not work out in the end--a similar outlook I had and still kinda do have, albeit toward my creative endeavors, not romantic relationships (I don't really have experience in that arena tbh)

But now after ATSV she's throwing caution to the wind with Miles, she's gonna face the music and use words this time. And some of those words, might be romantic! Gwen is gonna have a lot to say to Miles, there's so much she'll want to express to him--has been wanting to express to him for 2 years now! A lot of gushy mushy sweet stuff perhaps! Perhaps some rizzy words, yknow? And knowing Gwen, they're probably gonna have a hard time coming out the way she'd like! And it'll probably be very funny!

for us anyway

Ahh, the mythic struggle beauty of being an introvert.

[ayeforscotland]

Trying to limit and monitor kids’ social media usage would make so many problems so much worse and I need people to think about it objectively and not take it into consideration just because the concept is a knee-jerk reaction from a grieving mother being exploited by everyone around her.

— Kids already lie about their age, so an age limit is already unenforceable unless you literally require legal ID, which is an incredible breach of privacy with even further safety risks.

— Vulnerable children including LGBTQ kids living with bigoted families would be put in real-life danger of abuse or homelessness if their families had a way of knowing when they’re seeking support.

— The internet and technology is a requirement to navigate the world around you at the most basic level. That is a fact and schools know it too. Limiting access to that in this day and age would be massively limiting one’s knowledge, safety and basic life skills, especially if their family is neglectful or abusive.

— What constitutes as social media cannot necessarily strictly be defined. Some people consider WhatsApp to be social media despite the fact it’s a texting app, and the people you communicate with there are presumably people you’ve spoken to before if you know their numbers. Kids need a way of communicating with people for both practical and safety reasons, and blanketing almost everything as ‘social media’ and limiting access to it inhibits that.

— If you put a ban on all ‘social media’ until the age of 16 and then suddenly allow access, what you end up with is a child who has zero knowledge or experience of something suddenly being thrown into a world where anything is possible. It’s like when teens are forbidden alcohol their whole lives and the day they turn 18 they go on a massive binge not knowing their limits and end up either sick or in the hospital. It’s a recipe for disaster. They NEED exposure so they can learn.

— Let’s be real, kids would find a way around a ban through VPNs or other means anyway. We all figured out how to dodge the website blockers at school when we were 12. I doubt this would be any different.

While the fact that one of the killers watched gore on the dark web is indeed concerning, I really feel the spotlight is being shone on entirely the wrong issue here. Their conversations about the murder were all on social media and provided significant proof for the case. What kids need isn’t for adults to try to control them and read everything into their lives, it’s for adults to communicate with them and make them feel comfortable enough to talk to them when they have a problem. And that’s ignoring the, you know, whole transphobia thing.

(Sorry to write a dissertation in your inbox but despite my deepest sympathies and compassion for Esther seeing people put any stock into her awful, awful idea when that’s so clearly not the problem does quite frustrate me and I need everyone to know just how illogical it is)

I don’t need to add anything to that besides saying this line of argument is very similar to the people who campaign for an internet where no one can be anonymous, it puts so many additional people at risk.

Thanks for taking the time to share!

[blueiight]

“what can the damned really say to the damned?” is what this episode asks. and well… “nothing.” is what the show answers us with.

we are introduced to louis and claudia as ultimate outcasts to the mortals around them and vampiredom: louis attempts to maintain the illusions of humanity in similar structures once more, casting grace as his lost wife and claudia as his daughter, as claudia seeks to find other vampires. armand, clearly pissed about the interview as is, decides to draw upon 150 years of prior work experience as a playwright toward the end of this episode, which is quite frankly, a bit much considering how daniel’s already scared shitless. and theres a terrible romantic specter in europe following louis thats named lestat. its a lot going on here, and im bound to not cover everything. i do want to cover dreamstat, and me and you(5x) but i will wait for the season to progress to do that^_^

‘He asked me if we could go home. Home? Can there be a more offensive question? Run back to New Orleans. Pry up his bones, why don’t you? Louis de Pointe du Lac, dead weight.’

louis and claudia’s tension in this particular episode revolve around the killing — or the betrayal that prevented the killing — of lestat. et tu, louis? stowaways on ships, trains, and wagons and a totally alien environment where even the blood is hostile to them, is it any wonder louis dreams of lestat? is it any wonder, having access to louis’s mind, in pursuit of some understanding of vampires beyond the facismile of the nuclear structure, that claudia continues to feel betrayed? i always think to myself, if claudia had qualities that made the average fan more sympathetic to her, would they understand how she was betrayed by louis specifically that night? would they be able to sympathize with claudia’s incredible perserverance despite, and because of, everything thats happened to her? and how that betrayal is the underlying tragedy and romance alike of the narrative that made 1940 mardi gras’s aftermath so haunting that louis in dubai did not remember it or was made not to until the other night?

following that in the flashbacks is when dreamstat first appears, clearly an extension of louis’s own mind at this own point, and he asks louis:

Four years of grim wayfaring, and still no sight of the benevolent vampire. So how does denial manifest itself tonight? … Was she worth it?

its so telling that lestat is the image louis calls upon to embody his most bitter feelings toward claudia in this sequence. dreamstat deserves his own breakdown, especially in relation to louis& claudia’s conversation when she first finds the revenant, as well as the wider events in dubai…

speaking of revenants, morgan in the show is a proto-daniel of sorts an abandoned journalist whos interest in photography exposes the illusion of grace the wife and claudia the impossible daughter, and tries to understand louis through the perspective of the mortal hes been given — did he go AWOL, or is he a black bolshevik? louis when questioned absconds, and closes up what little of himself he’s sold to morgan. its a smart way to include him in the narrative, as morgan is witness to emilia’s beheading after she was attacked by said revenant… and louis turns his head, truly embodying the detachment of the vampire in this moment. human affairs, their problem. this is a really good example of whats meant by ‘human affairs’ in the show, by the way. this episode features claudia & louis facing racism from military to children, and thats not framed as a ‘human affair’, but as one of many haunting aspects of their immortal existences.

claudia, in the pursuit for vampires, continues the metaphor of adoption in how she tries to find some sort of companionship and her current understanding of romania as this ancestral home to the vampire. whats also noticeable here is how claudia trying to make sense of centuries of legends is a striking parallel to how louis in the present day attempts to make sense of whats ‘true’ and ‘untrue’ from her diaries. claudia’s private accounts in the present that she never intended to be so deeply analyzed as anything other than her internal narrative in the moments she wrote them has become, to louis, a similar sort of legend thats necessary to decode for his own sense of self.

She writes here, ‘I do not dream.’ I can confirm that. At least, that’s what she said to me once when I was talking about one of my dreams which were erratic and often in those years. Of course, she might’ve just said that to shut me up, but yet… she writes it here so… let’s believe it. She continues. ‘We traveled light in our ancestral home. We slept in the earth, took circuitous routes around the mad army goose-stepping its way toward mother Russia…’

I woke that night to the sound of chaos erupting nearby. Claudia was, uh.. . she was dreaming. Her head twitching like you would. […] No, I can feel her. I can feel her next to me. She’s having a nightmare. What’s worse than a nightmare? If your soul’s projecting out its fears, at least it’s up and running. But the absence of anything? The void, the nothing, pieces… coming back. Hours, nights, objects surfacing in water… It was just something she’d wrote. But it wasn’t true. She could dream.

dubai louis’s recollection of claudia and the existential dread of eternally being damned, the terror of lacking a soul, a rather catholic fear but still having a sequence of memories that cycle back into an immortal brain, replay in this inversed sleep cycle, can be malleable, forgotten, poke a hole in louis’s attempt to utilize claudia’s diaries as but an extension of his own narrative, and offers a glimpse at what is truly at stake in this second interview.

[senblades]

Just realized that Crow and Violet enter the Phantom thieves group with the same condition, though not the same circumstances.

They both first Joined as a fake of themselves, fooling everyone. Then they were a 2-phase boss fight, where the true self gets revealed. Then they join the team, for good and for real.

Hmmmmmmmmm

ANON YOU'RE SO RIGHT I'M

I'll always be a little sad that Atlus never went all-in on the SumiGoro friendship/parallels potential... o7 another fallen dynamic for the pit

in all seriousness, though: many people have talked about the Akechi and Sumire parallels far better than I ever could, but I'll talk some more anyway!

I think the most obvious parallel is in who they admire/resent. Sumire, obviously, admires Kasumi in every way- undercut with resentment that she's scared to ackowledge. Akechi, meanwhile, resents Joker to hell and back, undercut with layers of admiration that he refuses to admit to (+ uh. shauke angst HAHA)

Both are lying to themselves about their other halves, but even more interestingly: Both Kasumi and Joker see Sumire and Akechi respectively as their equals/rivals, despite everything, and even though it may seem that one half is clearly better than the other at first glance.

Sumire's coach, during the Faith confidant, tells Sumire how Kasumi had worked so hard because she knew if she didn't, Sumire would catch up to her- that Kasumi was jealous of Sumire's grace (Ironic, as meanwhile Sumire was desperate to emulate Kasumi's boldness)

Joker's a bit different -silent protag, and all- but, even still: "I'll hold onto you're glove", "I won't lose"- so much of Joker's dialogue about Akechi makes it clear that he takes the other seriously. Plus, the consistent reminders that the promise for a rematch hasn't been fulfilled: clearly, Joker doesn't consider the interrogation room nor the engine room 'fair fights', or true indicators of either's skill (stop me before I go on a tangent)

It's not just Joker=Kasumi and Sumire=Akechi, though. The fact that both sides of each equation are equals means that some lines get crossed. I'm thinking Kasumi's "Because that's my right, as the elder sister!" vs. Akechi's "Going all out against a junior seems a bit gauche, don't you think?"- both Kasumi and Akechi seem to have this idea that they have to be better (a bit of speculation on my part, for Kasumi)- they have no excuse to lose; it's only natural if they win, and incredibly dissapointing otherwise.

back to crow/violet parallels, they also act as excellent foils for each other in the royal trio dynamic: Sumire, when faced with low self-esteem and terrible circumstances, latches onto people that she considers "better"- imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, after all! And Sumire has imitation in spades.

Akechi, meanwhile, distances himself from pretty much everyone. He seems to value shallow praise of people that don't really see, rather than experience the mortifying ordeal of being known, and whatnot.

but even then, Akechi does have some similar tendencies to Sumire- he just hides it under layers of deflection and lying to himself. He claims to absolutely hate Shido and Joker, and while I don't doubt that, necessarily, it's clearly far more complicated than that. Akechi, no matter how he feels about them, lives and dies by the will of his obsessions- and by the time of the third semster, he's had enough. (while, conversely, Sumire hasn't quite learned to stand on her own)

Actually, speaking of the third semester; Maruki's reality also highlights some similarities between the two, as the two people most egregiously edited by the false reality: Sumire, back to believing she's Kasumi, and Akechi as "I've never had a violent thought in my life!" pleasant boy. Those two are the only members of the PT where Maruki goes straight for the personality.

whoops. long post HAHA

[anishenanigans]

When Monkie Kid said you can't change what you were in the past, but it's never too late to change now. and when it said you have to learn to make peace with the parts of yourself that scare you. and when it said only you get to decide who you are. and only you can decide what you will become. and when it said you should never give up on life, because even though it will all come to an end, because even though it hurts so badly, it will only get better if you live to see it happen, and there is so much left for you to experience. and when it said that no matter how helpless you feel you are not doomed to die like this and you do not have to feel like this forever. and when it said changing for the better is scary but you don't ever have to do it alone. and when it said it's all going to be okay in the end.

Idk. Something about this show. It's got me in a chokehold.

In a similar vein, there was so much love and emotional catharsis in Season 5. Hugging and holding hands without reservation. The genuine concern the others express for MK's wellbeing, the support they offer in their own unique ways. MK working on accepting the things he's repressed the most (after 4 seasons of bottling it all up). The sincerity with which even Red Son talks about love. The blatant "I love you" from Pigsy. The "I don't want to lose you" from Wukong. The multiple instances of characters breaking down and taking a moment to truly cry, to let it all out. All the things left unsaid but so clearly felt. The promises of togetherness, no matter what happens. They've all come so far.

Yeah, season 5 made me fucking sob. I'm not much of a crier and I've never actually been brought to tears by a piece of fiction before, but here we are. There's a first time for everything, I guess.

This season wasn't at all what I expected. I'm not sure it was what anyone expected. But it was delightful. And it hit hard. And it did what it set out to do, even if things didn't quite happen the way they were supposed to.

It really wasn't that long ago that the theme was presumed dead in the water. And now... we're five seasons in. Not many Lego themes, or animated series, can claim that milestone.

We are watching what is arguably Lego's most ambitious and unique story unfold, despite how badly it's been screwed over time after time. Despite the fact that nobody thought it would make it this far. Despite the fact that everything the show is doing goes against what's expected from the hand it was dealt.

Is that poetic? Maybe.

Overall, Season 5 has quickly gained a special place in my heart. Especially after a few hours of letting it marinate in my brain. Man I love this show. Is it a silly Lego cartoon? Yes. Is it also genuinely poignant and beautiful and made with so much passion? Also yes.

And this concludes my thoughts for now. I'm so glad we had another incredible season, and I can't wait to see where it goes from here.

[karasuno-planet]

Long Distance + Prying Eyes- Oikawa Tooru

Post-Timeskip Oikawa x fem!reader

genre: a little bit of angst w/jealousy, but mostly fluff <3, sfw

wc: 0.6k

a/n: wow i wrote for a character that's not a Karasuno player?? Are you shocked? amazed? proud? thanks guys. my requests are open, enjoy <3

(gif not mine)

You had always felt like long-distance was a little harder on you than it was on him, despite his constant reminders that he misses you just as much. When he moved to Argentina he was swept up in the sport he had always been so devoted to, and who knew there would be just as many fangirls in Argentina as there were in Japan?

You were the only one who got to know Tooru in the way that you do, though. You have everything those girls want but could never have, but there was always still a lingering tinge of jealousy for the fact that they got to be physically around him while you were constantly reminded of his absence.

You sat in your apartment, eagerly tuning in to an interview Oikawa was doing. You opened your phone to see Tooru had sent you yet another picture of himself, this time showing you the outfit he had chosen for the interview. Soon enough, you see his tall frame walk on screen and sit down with the interviewer.

The questions had been pretty normal, asking mostly about his sport and his experience as an olympian. But your attention was particularly grabbed when the interviewer started asking about his personal life.

"So, Oikawa, it's no secret that you're the attracting force of a new fanbase, particularly a lot of girls your age have been tuning in since you joined the team here in Argentina."

He kept his sincere composure, seemingly unfazed by the question and still flashing his million-dollar smile, "Yes, I've had the opportunity to meet a lot of fans lately, which I'm grateful for."

"Oh, you have? Anyone in particular? I know our viewers are dying to know if someone has captured your heart."

"Well I hope I make it come across clearly that I'm in a serious relationship..." He responded using a light-heated tone, but he still came off a little defensive. You didn't mind that.

"Really? Tell us more!"

"I try to keep that aspect of my personal life a little more private, but I have a beautiful girlfriend back in Japan. I hope to show you more of her soon," He smiled so confidently while talking about you, and the respectful way he always spoke about you made your heart melt.

"How do you feel about your fans then? Are you creeped out?" The interviewer seemed to be asking questions to probe him for drama rather than discuss his career, which felt so skeevy to you. Thankfully, Oikawa was more than equipped to handle the questions.

"I'm always grateful for the support, and honestly flattered, but I always call for fans to respect my relationship and it hasn't been a huge issue." He smiled and nodded his head, "I just find myself so in love that it doesn't even faze me anymore. I don't give a single look to other girls." Upon hearing this your cheeks flushed red; there was no better words he could've said to the world to solidify how he felt about you and push away prying eyes.

A similar rush was given to you as you saw the words "I just find myself so in love that it doesn't phase me anymore" printed at the top of a news article the next day with your boyfriend's smiling face right below.

Long distance was not easy by any stretch, but having Oikawa Tooru as your boyfriend made it so worth it.

[masterlist]

[mallahanmoxie]

one thing about ham dani that nobody seems to get and why I'm always fighting for my life in the webtoon's comment section is that in all her fear and reticence around opening herself up with her friends, believing she belongs in this world, trusting in her place and relationships is that SHE'S NEVER WRONG ABOUT THE NEGATIVES. i think it's very easy to look at dani a hundred chapters in still going on about her place as a side character and what she can expect from them realistically, what she can allow herself to feel for them, and feel frustrated, like she's being deliberately obtuse. but dani. is. not. wrong.

one thing that many isekais do is that they will take the premise of "being transported to a novel" and use that simply as a vehicle for the FL to use her knowledge of the future to her advantage and turn the odds on their head. beyond the initial "ehhh why is the ML flirting with me??" which tends to wear off rather easily, there is little questioning about what being in a story means. and inso's law takes that question seriously. because dani IS inside a story, her friends ARE characters AND THIS IS EASILY PROVABLE SINCE THE BEGINNING. How? because she leaves.

it has happened to her before! It happens multiple times in the novel! that's why march 2nd is SO terrifying for her, because everything she's built can be taken from her in the blink of an eye and SHE will be called crazy and SHE will be left grieving and nobody else will remember what ONLY SHE LIVED. she is effectively, practically, tangibly separate from each world by this experience. when dani insists on the labels of main character, side character, the tropes and the narrative possibilities happening within them SHE'S NOT WRONG!! because those things are TRUE!!! I know it's easy to gloss over it bc we as readers just take everything in as a story, but the crazy plot points? they're insane to her too because SHE is a real person and others are not! They're characters! That's why it's called The Law of Webnovels because dani is making sense of the rules of a world which factually functions distinctly different from hers. she's not making that shit up, it's not (entirely) an emotional hold up. that's shit's fucking real.

the nuance is brought on by the fact that the characters are, in fact, also people. they behave like people (albeit inside the margins of wild webnovel logic), they feel like people and they see her as a person. but she does not entirely reciprocate, because to view them as people means assuming the hurt that will inevitably come when 1) she gets sent back into the real world and loses them all or 2) the plot to the novel finally kicks in and who knows if the guy she liked was the ML and will end up with her best friend and all her love and all her trying were for nothing. No matter what, dani loses.

there's also the fact, which i think is exemplified very clearly in her feelings towards her grades and being compared to yeoryung, that even outside the character/real person dichotomy, ham dani and the boys come from WILDLY different backgrounds. when they graduate high school, they will go to different colleges and they will get different jobs and the wide wide gap which dani had managed to bridge due to the magic of webnovel rules will be opened once again. in the social hierarchy of modern korean society, dani will be left behind. ban yeoryung is somewhat immune to this despite sharing similar socioeconomic status because she has 1) better social capital in the form of her beauty and intelligence and 2) plot armour immunity bc she's destined to be with one of the boys anyway (and again it IS destiny bc she's the FL and according to the genre clues dani's been gathering that seems to be the most likely outcome). yeoryung has resources and tools beyond the story that dani cannot access. even IF this wasn't the world of a webnovel, if they existed in the real world, yeoryung COULD feasibly climb her way up but dani? she's realistic about her prowess and she knows very well that being a good friend and a good person does not mean she will get to remain close to her friends who are much much much richer. my point here being that even if she weren't under the assumption (WELL TESTED!!! SCIENTIFIC, EVEN!!!) that she's in the world of a story ruled by story laws, she wouldn't be silly for guarding her heart against the possibility of drifting away from byr+the boys.

all of this is why i love dani's character arc and her as a person. she doesn't act irrationally. she only acts very, very humanly. it's why i loved the kidnapping arc and her confrontation with choi yuri. she has to learn to treat them seriously, as human beings, because despite factually being characters, they don't have the awareness of it and their lives are every bit as real as any other to them. it's part also of dani learning how to be a person herself, because she's still a kid growing up and learning what's what, and doing so in an environment much more stressful than the usual. i think people are being irrationally mean towards her simply because they do not make the effort to understand her.

[mimikoolover]

https://www.tumblr.com/mimikoolover/758285045353136128/i-havent-seen-any-hate-or-negative-comments

Hard agree on all this🙏

If anything, i expected more “awkwardness” than we got, and not because they aren’t comfortable with each other but because of the filming. It’s a weird experience to be on camera like that. Sure they’re used to it but at that point it had been a long time since they filmed something like that, and they never did it just the two of them before. Plus them both being kinda sick, it wasn’t ideal.

Despite that though I think it was super clear how close they are and they’re really giving old married couple who know everything about each other and are used to dealing with each other’s quirks and habits, mixed with goofy best friends. Which honestly, if they are in fact a couple and have been for a long time, that dynamic makes a lot more sense than them being all lovey dovey or whatever some expect. Not that I would expect them to show anything overly romantic in a show anyway because duh, but most couples who have been together for years are a lot like them. Obviously their situation is quite unique, and I’m not even saying I believe they’re comparable to any conventional relationships, but still.

Also, as an Audhd’er it often saddens me to see people misunderstand Jungkook. I can’t diagnose him with anything ofc, but his brain seems to work similar to mine in a lot of ways. And Jimin seems to understand how he functions. Of course he’s gonna still be annoyed with him sometimes, that’s human, and they clearly have a dynamic where they’re very okay with joke roasting each other and teasing and just laugh it off. But at their core it’s super clear that they have a deep understanding of each other and accept each other the way they are. It’s beautiful to see. People being offended for Jimin because of how Jungkook expresses himself or how he appears in certain situations always rubbed me the wrong way. @ those people: Jimin gets him and loves him, you don’t, shut up.

And the other way around, well anyone hating on Jimin for anything in that show or any other time he’s around Jungkook can choke. Nothing they ever said about him makes sense. So I won’t even get into it lol

It’s funny how jimin saying he had to push for the show to happen or it wouldn’t could be taken so differently than how I see it. To me it’s the same as when Jimin said Jungkook wouldn’t have travelled around if he didn’t come, or when hobi and namjoon said Jungkook doesn’t like going places but Jimin always drags him along, in BV. Seems like Jimin knows some things that are easy for him might be more difficult for Jungkook. And he doesn’t seem to mind taking the leading role when it comes to these things. It seems to work out perfectly for them. If Jungkook is anything like me, he’d just be happy these types of bigger plans are being set up without him having to take charge himself. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love spending time with Jimin lol those are two very different things.

oh I completely agree with you on everything.

I feel it's funny for people to say that jikook were awkward when you have them sit on a sofa holding hands right at the start. I'm lowkey convinced the awkwardness was cause jungkook had to reel himself back a bit for the cameras. he should share whatever he's comfortable sharing with us and people have no right to demand more. idk if people expect him to for example say how much he missed jimin and how sad he was without him etc. this could be what he tells jimin in private. he doesn't have to tell us this cause it's none of our business frankly.

jikook totally understand each other and are in tune with each other's emotions and you can tell when for example jungkook was upset after kayaking, jimin was speaking to him in a way that helped him get over it and not only that but jungkook was receptive to that which is lovely to see. atp they know each other well enough and how they treat each other is for the other's sake not to make fans happy or show fans what they want to see.

I also think if we think back to their Japan trip in 2017 that was organised by jungkook so it's not like he doesn't want to travel with jimin or anything like that. but going to the company and getting the travel show rolling is a lot different to that and jimin was happy to take it upon himself to start the process of the show so I don't see what anyone's issue can be. jungkook probably appreciated that loads and he was so enthusiastic about it, I think that will be even clearer in future interviews they did where they talk about where to go but even him saying they should do this until they're 50 shows it's not a chore to him and that he really enjoys it.

[epickiya722]

Now that the manga is over, I thought over my previous feelings about the little interaction Kenjaku and Yuji had and...

Nothing changed.

Especially when it was already too late.

I don't mean too late as in "Gege now can't have them interact" I mean as in "exactly, what good is it going to do for either of them after Kenjaku clearly is a terrible parent".

Yuji being told Kenjaku was his mother would only make things worse for him.

I'm all for a good tragedy and whatnot, don't get me wrong and I would have liked more interactions.

But in this story, I know nothing good would come of it.

And it ties into how parents... they're not the greatest in this story. Name a character in this story who actively had a present parent in this story that they actually had a good relationship with.

Junpei. That's it, Junpei.

And maybe Panda, if you count Yaga as his dad.

But guess what they have in common?

Parents are dead.

Let's be real here, parents in this story are either terrible, dead or absent. Sometimes even a mix of two or all three.

Kenjaku and Yuji would not have been the expectation. It was clear that Kenjaku saw Yuji as another experiment, another tool in their plans.

The relationship between Kenjaku and Yuji is slightly different from Kenjaku and Choso because Kenjaku is Yuji's mother and Choso's father.

Mothers would sometimes have a different relationship with children than fathers would.

Kenjaku carried Yuji while using Kaori's body. Kenjaku didn't carry Choso, who loves his mother.

But here's the thing!

Given just how tragic and heartbreaking as a story JJK was... the absent bond there between Kenjaku and Yuji is one of the most heartbreaking things yet somehow crafted well enough that it makes sense when you sit and think about it. To me though, I don't know about anyone else but whatever.

Mothers are expected to love and nurture a child more than fathers. Yet, when they don't, it's like "how could a mother not love the child she birthed"? It happens.

Maybe, just maybe that's what Akutami was aiming for. Maybe the mangaka wants us as an audience to feel frustrated they never got to talk as a mother and son. Maybe we were supposed to feel saddened Yuji didn't get to know what it felt like to have a mother. Maybe we were supposed to be angry that Kenjaku never told Yuji directly that "Hey, I used to possess the body of a woman to birth you. Yes, I am your mother!"

Stories are written for the audience to feel, after all.

Hell, thinking about it, maybe Kenjaku wanted Yuji to figure that out like how Choso did. Otherwise, why didn't they ever say anything to Yuji but could say something to a normal person who had little connection to him (Sasaki)?

Had Yuji been told, it would have just been extra information for him. He probably wouldn't want anything to do with Kenjaku even with the knowledge of they're his mother. He didn't when Wasuke tried to tell him about his parents.

Choso didn't know Yuji was his brother and once he did, he did everything he could to be the best big brother he could be.

Kenjaku? Knew this whole time who they were to Yuji and yet did nothing, but play games and abandon him.

The mangaka may have wanted to indulge more with what could have been when it came to Kenjaku and Yuji, but at the same time... I doubted he would have portrayed them forging a bond or even Kenjaku getting away with being a terrible parent.

But something else that I do love is that despite the lack of a bond, Yuji is like Kenjaku in some ways.

His interests, his charm, his aura, the way he gets excited and talks about something, how they even fight is a little similar!

I can think of four instances where I pointed out their similarities.

Here

Here

Here

Here

[queerplatonicshipshowdown]

Round 3, Match 3

Crowley and Aziraphale (Ineffable Husbands) from Good Omens vs. Camilla Hect and Palamades Sextus (Campal) from The Locked Tomb!

Propaganda for Ineffable Husbands:

They are each others everything; they discarded their former affiliations to form their own sides; they are the best of friends and so close that they can't imagine life without each other. But they also *canonically* (at least in the books) do not experience sexual attraction, or romantic attraction, at least not in the same way humans do; their relationship *cannot* be defined by something as simple as romance, and this is a view the author (Neil Gaiman) has endorsed. Hence, queer platonic.

EEEEEEEE they're so CUTE and they LOVE each other and the fact that this love doesn't have to be specifically romantic doesn't make it less REAL and that warms my aspec heart.

those bitches are qpps for sure

In the book they’ve been friends for thousands of years and are v involved in each other’s lives (routinely have dinner ‘dates’, Crowley frequently hangs out at Aziraphale’s bookshop, generally hanging out and stuff.) Since their not human, they don’t really understand human relationships, love, and gender which makes their relationship v queer. They’re mistaken as a couple by other characters despite not being in a romantic relationship. In the show the same things happen and new scenes are added showing how their friendship grew, them becoming much more devoted to each other, and various struggles they’ve had in their relationship. (ei. Sorta breaking up, them each wanting different things out of life)

they've known each other for over 6,000 years. they saved the world together. they have saved each other over and over again. they love each other so deeply and you can see their love for each other in everything they do. as an aromantic queerplatonic person they embody what queerplatonic love means to me so perfectly

Propaganda for Campal:

They're two people who have spent their whole lives together and are hopelessly devoted and loyal to each other. While some people do read their relationship as strictly romantic or platonic, it has way more going for it through a QP lense! They've been lifelong friends, and in their culture are essentially non-romantic life partners as a necromantic wizard and his bodyguard/champion. It's actually strictly taboo for them to engage in a romantic relationship because of this. But nonetheless they remain close to and devoted to each other, going so far as to use necromancy to keep each other close after one of them dies, and then going on to share a body until it becomes physically impossible to do so any longer. So they burn both of their souls to merge together into one new entity, creating a walking metaphor for queerplatonic partnership. They endlessly support and encourage each other, they're a perfect team when it comes to both peaceful study and combat. They know each other inside and out, long before they had to share a body, they were inseperable.

They're two halves of one whole, literally, and nothing about that intense closeness and partnership is written to be romantic! Especially because other, similar characters in the series ARE written to read as romantic, and there's a distinct tonal difference to those relationships! Basically, they're two peas in a pod, two halves of a whole, clearly not quite platonic with it, but certainly not romantic either.

The author of The Locked Tomb has a long term queerplatonic partner! She even dedicates the books to him and signs those dedications with a <> (which is a Homestuck reference, denoting a non-romantic partnership that a number of fans associate with QPPs!). You can feel the influence of her own experience with queerplatonic attraction in a lot of the series, but it really comes through especially in Cam and Pal!!

[desertfangs]

Do you think Marius ever viewed Daniel's turning through the blood and noticed the similarities, how his own experience of turning Armand was replayed 500 years later by his child with another mortal boy who wanted to live in darkness forever?

Do you think he was proud of the care Armand took with Daniel in his final hours and moments? That he may have reflected on his own traumatic turning and been glad that he was at least able to prevent Armand, and by extension Daniel, from receiving the dark gift in the same way?

Help I made myself emotional ☹️

You made me emotional! 😭 When I first read this I just stared at it for a bit and thought 'damn I really love these three.' So thank you for that! I do think Marius must have seen Daniel's turning through the blood but also, I can imagine Daniel told him all about it, too. What we got in DM is beautiful but I'm sure there are plenty of details left out and I can see Daniel talking about it one night when he's feeling emotional about being a vampire, maybe not long after his recovery.

I think at lot about that elusive time after Daniel is healed from his madness, before PL, when Marius and Daniel's relationship is evolving. I don't know how close or distant Armand was to them at that time--clearly he was not with them, but what kind of contact they had and how regular it was is anyone's guess. But I imagine Daniel spent a lot of that time reflecting on being immortal and how that came to be, and everything that transpired, and I can see him telling the whole story of his turning to Marius one night while they're cuddled on the sofa or just having a quiet evening.

And I do think Marius must be proud of Armand for how he did Daniel's turning, the way he shaved him and prepped him for immortality so lovingly, the way he used his illusion of the garden, etc. (I also wonder if it's something Armand and Marius ever talked about it, either on Night Island, or later. Harder to see that coming up, although then again, when Marius sees Armand again for the first time in centuries, he's got this shiny new fledgling, so maybe they did discuss it.)

But I especially agree that he probably loves that despite what may have happened afterward, both Armand and Daniel were born into darkness in the most loving and gentle way, nothing like how Marius was taken against his will and tortured and forced into it. And his own turning of Pandora, too, was sort of foisted upon him and done hurriedly, without preparation or planning, so having been able to give Amadeo that ritualistic, loving turning was probably so important to him, even though it was done under the pressure of Amadeo being on the brink of death. And knowing Armand did similar for his only fledgling must warm his heart.

These three have so much love between them. There's a lot of trauma and mess passed down, too, but having such a pivotal thing be done to them out of love is just.. so important. No matter how much Armand and Marius may come at odds, or how often Armand and Daniel fight, they will always have that and know they were brought into immortality with love and adoration. And that makes me emotional AF. 🤧

[jewish-vents]

My entire life, I've yearned for the kind of community the Jewish community and Judaism have provided me. I found out I had Jewish ancestry when I was a kid, I looked into it more later and realized my most recent Jewish ancestor (like three-ish generations back) was almost certainly forcibly converted out, and decided to convert to like. Make amends for that I guess and also because I really vibed with the holidays and how we turn up everywhere in history bc we keep doing cool stuff despite consistently shitty circumstances.

But I digress.

I have waited my WHOLE LIFE trying to experience the joy becoming Jewish has shown me, and that gets shit on constantly.

My sister has started making a truly obscene number of Jew jokes. My mom scoffs at all the 'nonsense rules' and has said repeatedly that she thinks choosing a 'restrictive' religion is dumb and I've made a mistake. She even said it's an insult to HER parenting skills that I would seek out religion after she tried to teach me to know better.

My dad is dead but I never ever in a million years would have told him even if he were alive, and my sister thinks it's funny to threaten to 'out' me as Jewish to his relatives even though they're basically KKK-adjacent so she actually enjoys threatening mg safety at this point. (Yay family right?)

My friends have turned everything into an Israel/Palestine discussion lately and I know damn well what they're doing when they start saying truly horrible shit about Israelis and looking at me. They get mad if I try to temper their extremism so I've given up. I barely talk to them anymore and I spend more and more time with other Jews from temple and I don't want to like. Isolate myself from all non-Jews I guess bc I've always felt like that leads to weirdness and perpetuates shit about Jews being unfriendly I guess idk?

Anyway I digress again. My point is I'm really sick of constantly being expected to tolerate it when people think I shouldn't be Jewish.

Other queer people think I'm somehow compromising my queer identity by being Jewish, leftists think I hunt Palestinian children for sport now apparently, right-wingers think I traffic good Christian babies for organ harvesting or some shit idfk, my friends think that if I'm not being more vitriolic in my hatred of Israel than they already are I'm some kind of secret rabid Netanyahu fan, my family think I've been recruited into a cult apparently and the only other people who show me even an ounce of compassion or regard are other Jews and Gd knows there's like ten of us and that number is unlikely to increase.

Just. Fuck. I've put blood, sweat, tears and money into this, I invested more time and emotional commitment into this than I have into going to college or choosing a career, I love it more than anything and have only loved it more the more I learned about it, and all I get when I express this or even just let slip that I am Jewish and chose to be, I get nothing but hatred. I will never understand how a religion that has spent all 5000 years of our existence minding our business and arguing about the same book over and over can possibly have offended this many people with our existence.

Dmn anon, that is a lot you're dealing with right now. I'm so sorry you're surrounded by people who clearly don't respect you. Because yes this is a lack of basic respect, and it is antisemitic. Now I don't know how old you are and how safe you are, but if you can safely do so, set very hard boundaries. Do not tolerate this amount of disrespect towards who you are. It is hard, and many of us have had to go through similar situations, as you can read all over this blog. But I think having to spend your life surrounded by people who make you feel unsafe and disrespected is worse. I know sometimes there are situations in which people cannot safely set these boundaries, I hope it's not your case, but if it is feel free to come here to vent again.

I know you don't want to isolate yourself from goyim. Many Jewish people don't want to. Sadly, when people disrespect us like this, they're the ones isolating us. It's not your fault. Seek people who love and accept you. Sadly, a good chunk of goyim won't - I'm not saying everyone, obviously, but a portion. Having a good Jewish support network seems to be more and more important, whether it's irl or online.

I hope you can soon be in an environment that's safer and more accepting

- 🐺

[tollingreminiscentbells]

Hi there! I just finished devouring your accu au and just. Wow. I had to say something, because I haven't enjoyed a fic like that in a while. I'm very, very, VERY picky with my smut - especially when it comes to alastor, ESPECIALLY when he is actively being tagged as ace - and I am pleased to say that the emotional and physical intimacies of your writing truly astounded me. Not only did I, as an ace, feel comfortable with the scenes, but I enjoyed them and the way Alastor interacted with them. His "delusional" not-sex moments were my absolute favourite, and I found myself smiling when he would defend his view of sex. Obviously everyone is different, but for me personally, I feel like you are one of very few writers who actually got the asexual-but-not-sex-repulsed bit perfect. I truly related to some moments and the relationship between Al and Lucifer was so understanding that it made everything feel fluid and real. To me, smut is something that I find boring half the time - the times I do enjoy it are always when there's some juicy character growth mixed in, and your writing has that in spades. I applaud your skills. Accu made me so happy to read; it was an absolute delight. When I saw on your tumblr here that you're working on another fic, I thought I might be in heaven. I am so terribly excited to see what you've been working on, especially with all the history and research you've mentioned putting in to this new fic.

I also read your Alastor selfcest fic, and as someone who is quite easily swayed by selfcest, I must say that I enjoyed that one, too. I would love to hear what other fantastic Alastor ideas are in that intelligent, magnificent brain of yours.

In the interest of forcing this to become the norm instead of hiding behind my anxiety, I am extending a formal invitation to chat about hazbin or whatever else if you so desire. I would love to talk about ships and fics and be friends. Of course, no hard feelings if not!

I wish you all the best and hope this long-ass comment finds you well. May you continue to write what pleases you. Thank you for your time.

Love and Support, Loliqua

Oh, thank you so much for this message! It's delightful and made my day! I've said before that I consider A Terrible Beauty, specifically, some of the best writing I've done in probably the last 5 years, and that whole AU is very special to me. It makes me happy beyond words, really, when other people love those fics like I do.

It's funny. When I started writing for this fandom I didn't talk about my own asexuality. I actually didn't consider it relevant information at the time. I've talked about all of this since then, but I write Alastor's relationship with sex in a way that is similar to my own. I write sex scenes for the character development and these particular sex scenes are a reflection of real lived experience. Genuine ace rep, you could say. I think that's what resonates with some readers and I'm just so glad that it landed with you!

When people talk to me about All changed, the two things most frequently mentioned are "I love him violently", and the delusional not-sex. And you know, if that is my legacy in this fandom, I will feel like I did my part and made a worthwhile contribution.

And I am indeed working on another fic! A Momentary Radiance, wherein Alastor sells his soul to Lucifer while still alive, kills a few people, and romance ensues. A lot of references and homages, as well as the historical fiction aspect, which you'll see most clearly in the content of Alastor's radio show. I took a more traditional approach with this fic, so I've been working on it quietly since early July. Despite my major international move not long ago, we are finally almost across the finish line.

Then there are . . . several other fic ideas that I'm trying to ignore for now. It's getting out of hand. And if you want to hear about the madness, I am always more than happy to make friends!

💜

[theadventurerslog]

Side Quest: King's Quest 1 AGDI Remake

Hey, guess what? New kind of entry. Sort of: my KQVI replay screensharing fits here too but tagging-wise, new, because I didn't think of it then.

There are sometimes going to be games I play I want to talk about but not do a full let's play style journal on, so that's what side quests will be.

In this case I got curious about the fan made remakes of King's Quest 1 - 3, which can be acquired here: https://agdinteractive.com/games/games.html.

So yeah here's yet another version of King's Quest 1.

Story and structure it's the same game. It's very faithful in that regard. However, it uses a point and click interface, although you can also walk with keys. It's essentially the same interface as V and VI down to config options and saving. There is also an option to turn off dead-ends. I don't know exactly how that affects puzzles but no doubt a worthwhile option for people who don't want to worry about that.

Visually it's very similar to and clearly based off KQ V and VI as well. Some of the screens have visually changed environmentally, which did cause me some confusion with my map.

And some things are still entirely familiar.

There is voice acting including Josh Mandel for Graham as he was in KQ V and the tiny bit in KQVI which was very cool of him to do. Although, his audio quality is noticeably different from the rest. He only speaks at the beginning and end however. All the descriptive text is decently narrated as well, though I am, I admit, spoiled by KQVI's narrator. I just love him.

Characters also have portraits.

The troll's an interesting take...

Here's the rat.

It's a bit of a mix of the AGI and SCI versions, more SCI than AGI. The Rumpelstiltskin puzzle uses the AGI solution with the backward cypher instead of simply his name backward. The stairs from the cloud land are the scarier SCI stairs however.

The beanstalk is still my enemy, though I had an easier time with it despite the SCI version also letting you click to move. I only fell a couple times!

On the other hand I had a lot more trouble with finding the path on the clouds and fell several times there...

Weirdly, the game in a way felt emptier to me. I think because Graham barely talks in the game and there isn't the text parser to play around with, so there isn't the opportunity to just try as much or type silly things. And there isn't a whole lot to interact with in ways beyond looking at them. (no talking to everything in sight like KQVI for example). Obviously your mileage would vary depending on how much you do goof around.

Some of the hot spots feel super finicky, so that could get irritating. I did discover when I was double-checking the help screen for something else that icons have a tiny red dot that act as the hit box point. Knowing that helped, but I still could have done with some broader or more generous hit boxes.

I think it could be good for people who want to play it but don't want to use a text parser and/or want to use the ability to turn off the dead ends. A bit more of a modern experience. Personally I think the SCI version is my preferred version, but it was an interesting jaunt anyway. II and III from what I've read and heard will have more interesting diversions and changes from the originals.

That all said impressive work for a fan project!

Three versions played now and I didn't get perfect points. I missed grabbing the slingshot. Hmph.

[good-beanswrites]

Eheheh! The anon who sent the ask on the Lights, Camera, Sing Your Sins here! Happy to hear you like the silly thought I made up, bonus on making a small drabble on it! So happy! >w<

So I guess when Mikoto's condition is revealed during his first interrogation, everyone's like "Ooooooh that's why..." over it. And uuuuuuh, does Kotoko feel bad for bashing Mikoto back then? I think it's not scripted according to that post you made back then, but no hard feelings between them, right? And I guess Shidou wouldn't be happy that the prisoners are getting into actual fights ;;

I really did! :D Thank you so much for reaching out, I love hearing people’s thoughts and ideas!!

I'm always very committed to keeping any canon hatred accurate -- I won't sugar-coat a relationship that has been stated to be terrible. However. This is not canon, and I am employing every fix-it in my arsenal >:3 So yes, there are absolutely no hard feelings between them and after every trial they hang out and make up!!

It pains me that all the violence in Mikoto’s interrogation has to be real, but yeah, neither of them pull any punches. Of course Red doesn’t want to hurt Es, but I picture all the prisoners really driven by the desire to tell their stories. Unlike in canon, the au characters are very aware that they’re going to represent a larger social issue/group of people. So when Mikoto is instructed to really sell it, he does it for the sake of accurate experiment results for others like him – and clings to the trust that Es signed up for this. 

And Kotoko’s interference is such a core part of her character: she’s observant, she’s clever, she’s used to and skilled at breaking rules, and she’s such a protector, even to the person who’s holding her imprisoned. It felt unfair to take that away from her by making it something Milgram scripted, so her reaction had to be real and just as violent ;-;

Okay so you know when you’re playing a game with friends/family and you feel very real anger at them for their decisions/actions? Then after it ends you can cool off and acknowledge it was just a game and there’s no hard feelings at all – but you can still clearly remember what made you upset and know it was valid? That’s what I'm picturing when the prisoners write their t2 plans. Kotoko’s anger towards the guilty prisoners is genuine by the end of the first trial. She’s very hurt that Mikoto wouldn’t tell them the truth about himself, after all the secrets they’d collectively shared. She’s disgusted by the others’ actions. She’s not actually planning on beating them up, but she recognizes she kinda wants to lol. Amane does hate Shidou. Yuno is tired of everyone. 

But a few days after the first trial ends, they start interacting in a setting that isn’t immersive anymore. They’re able to relax and talk through everything with clear minds. Kotoko apologizes profusely for hurting Mikoto during the interrogation, admitting that she’s not entitled to anyone else’s secrets. Amane apologizes to Shidou. She may not be as friendly to him as he was hoping, but she tells him that she understands they live under different codes and she shouldn’t hold hatred in her heart. Yuno gets a bit of time to refresh herself while they’re debriefing and collaborating with the writing team. She’s excited to be around the others by the time filming starts up again. Anyone who has anger towards Es lets it soften, feeling bad that they’re allowed to get a fun break while Es must remain asleep.

And I think Red and Kotoko would actually get really close in the au, despite their rocky start! They have very similar ideas on protecting the people they care about and being disgusted by those who abuse their power. Koto-koto duo is real!! 😤I can’t say for sure because so much could change in t3, but I’m hoping to write the two of them bonding over being labeled “the scary violent one” and slammed with a guilty vote next time ;-; 

If anything, Blue is more upset that she attacked Red than he is himself. (“That was our interrogation, what was she even doing there?”) And like you said, Shidou doesn’t want anyone to get hurt for real, so he pleads with them to keep their violence as staged as possible, going forward. He’s also extremely upset with Milgram that they’d let Es get hurt (since he’s the one who treated them afterwards). It takes such long time to assure him it won’t happen again, and that it was a one-time twist that Es signed off on beforehand.

Although I think the violence is going to get worse during this next hiatus, the au characters will actually feel less emotional, in my mind. After doing this for so long, I'm sure it would get easier to regulate which emotions are real and which result from too much immersion -- so there will be less to apologize and make up for this time, they're already very close and happy :')