#but uh. we got some other things
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shoshiwrites · 9 months ago
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7 from the February Nosebleed Club prompts for Jo/Egan🖤 - @lostloveletters
7. "pinky," Bucky Egan/war correspondent OC. @mercurygray or @basilone didn't know they were collaborating with me on this but they did:)
If she’s keeping count, this is the second time Bucky Egan has acquainted his fist with someone’s face on her behalf. 
That she knows of. If she’s keeping count.
Someone. William. Her William. Was. If he’s anyone’s William he’s not hers anymore, as he stumbles back, his fingers grasping at the worn, smooth wood of the bar. Rubbing his jaw as it makes a noise that curdles her stomach. He tries to hit back but he’s too stunned, too fuzzy from the beer, and Bucky just leans back and lets him miss.
His shoulders slope towards her like an aside, as he demonstrates with his hand. Behind them, the publican starts making noises, about the lack of respect, the threat of throwing them all out. It’s all true. She’s seized by a sudden flight in her feet, but he’s standing here next to her, and she doesn’t move. “See, just like I told you, gotta keep the thumb in like this-”
William runs his tongue over his teeth, his voice ragged and angry and different. “Jo.” 
She opens her mouth to speak — to say, she doesn’t know what — but all John does is stand between them, the threat of more should someone dare try, the blood rushing in her ears.
The woman William had been chatting up — the one in the blue dress — the one whose name she does or doesn’t know — is gone. 
And he leaves. Turns and leaves like a coward before she’s had the chance to throw the ring in his face. Not that she's one for that kind of display, but considering that her companion, tall enough that he has to watch his head for the beams, had just been moved to fisticuffs completely sober, well-
It all sounds different now, in her voice. Breaking, light. “John.”
“You alright, Captain?” he says, before he catches himself, realizes what she’s just called him. She’s not a captain tonight anyway, and maybe that’s one in her army of mistakes. Her trousers, her blouse, the medallion beneath the neckline. She wears it now instead of keeping it safe.
Is it raining outside? It smells like it will, or did, when she pushes through the door, the air thick and almost warm. He follows her out, the bike or two parked outside and a jeep. Around the side of the pub, a quiet path.
“Jo.”
What is she supposed to say? William doesn’t think she deserves to be here. William doesn’t think anything she writes is any better than anything any man with a byline could spit up. And she’d agreed to marry him. She’d thought that was ok. 
And John-
The day they’d come back from the scrapped mission, the one she’d been allowed to observe. Observe. A miracle she can hardly still believe, in more ways than one. Dumb luck, more like. It still sets her heart racing, if she thinks too hard about it. 
The ground beneath their feet again, and her knees knocking together and her ankles, the relief. The scarf damp against her collarbone. I knew you’d get up there, he’d said. You don’t let us tell you no. Mention how good I looked flying past you n’ Buck, alright?
Like it wasn’t a question. 
“Jo, tell me you don’t think he’s got the right to do that to you.” She’s frozen, like something could wind back what just happened. Her eyes fill with tears. He sees them, she knows he does. She’s still wearing the goddamn ring. She shakes her head, the smallest noise.
"What do you want, Jo, huh?” The question moves through his whole body, his arms, his hands. He means it, every word. You want me to find him and hurt him? I’ll do it. You want me to go kill a guy, I’ll go kill a guy. I do it all the time, it’s easy. “What do you want?" 
You.
It’s a shock in her chest, for the times she’s thought it before. Like a match lighting in a dark room.
Quieter now, his eyes trained on her. “What do you want?”
“You to kiss me.”
He stops. Only a second, trying to see her in the dark-dusk, against the trees and the tangled hedges, the last slivers of fading light. 
She’s looking up at him, watching him, before he stoops, so close that she can feel the curls against his forehead. A breath, that shaking pause, before he presses his lips against hers. Seeking her. He doesn’t taste like the beer he hasn’t drank, only toothpaste and the smell of aftershave, and warmth, and a little sweat. 
Her top lip in both of his, her hands at his jacket, her fists balled like she’ll drown.
“Easy there,” he says, the words dancing with a laugh, the complete absence of meaning it. She can’t help it, the stupid grin on her face, his hand cupping her jaw, his thumb on her cheek. The way he doesn’t stop kissing her.
The smallest stuttered noise in the back of his throat, the kind she feels in her hips. God-
“John-”
“Say that again.”
She whacks her palm lightly against his shoulder, pulls it back slow as his tongue catches at her front teeth. “Won’t push my luck on a Bucky, then-”
“Since when-” she says, and he wants to laugh again, how breathless she sounds. He’s here, he’s here, for how long, for how long- “Since when don’t you push your luck-”
He smiles against her mouth. The noise of people leaving the pub, or coming in. She straightens up, but he doesn’t pull all the way back. “If that’s all it took to get you to smile-" The back of his neck is warm under her hands, the short hair. He’s a little breathless too, the kind that stops her heart. “Am I better?”
Her lips press the soft spot against the side of his mouth, so firm she feels the gums beneath.  “What do you think, Major?”
He’s beaming, here in the dark. “I think I like it when you call me Major.”
“Do you, now?”
“Or John.” He presses his thumb against her chin, her bottom lip.
“Or Bucky.”
Soft against her ear, his voice. “Or Bucky.”
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magpie-rogue · 4 months ago
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My commissions are open!!
I really hate pulling out the labels card for help; but if you could help at least spread this so two transwomen and a disabled transmasc (me) can afford rent, food, gas, and to pay off whatever extra nonsense a few ER visits this past 1-2months has stacked up because one of our insurances is acting dumb. One is between jobs, another is trying to find a better paying one that will give her more hours, and I'm too disabled to work. We're doing all we can, but we need a bit of help.
So let me do art for you about it! You can find all my information on my carrd and here on my tumblr . You can find all my art and more examples on my blog or on my instagram . If you have any questions, please feel free to email me and I'll get back to you asap.
Thank you so much <3!!
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skrunksthatwunk · 2 years ago
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something he can't put into words.
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#ANOTHER DAIGO POST!!!! <333#also sorry for being like teehee yaoi dojima anyway daigo can't/probably shouldn't be close to his bio dad and latched onto this random#20 year old but Doesnt Quite recognize what is so wrong about sohei and so right about kiryu and how he should feel about either#meaning he cant fulfill his true desire (baby duck around kamurocho with his babysitter who's probably got better things to do bc people#always have better things to do than take care of him but at least kiryu pretends he enjoys it#for hours and hours and hours. some of the others ask him how he is or what he's up to at school but they don't really reach him like kiryu#does. he wants to impress him soooo bad. aughhh baby daigo you're annoying but you're also so emotionally neglected#haha latching onto mentors bc they're more involved/easier to connect to than parents haha who would do that not me ahem uh anyway#(skrunks be normal about and not project onto a kiryu + child dynamic challenge: impossible)#anyway he can't just say sohei's his father bc he's a big crime daddy but he hasn't really.. accepted? whats going on with kiryu yet either#i dont think he knows kiryu's his dad is my point#rgg#ryu ga gotoku#yakuza#dojima daigo#like a dragon#daigo dojima#ykz#i accidentally saved over soo many versions of this so i had to be like fuck it we ball. thats the final version of that panel now#gonna schedule this for later today bc i dont wanna stifle the kazumi posts but i also uh. am impatient#anyway more little daigo content he's such an ass but it makes so much sense why he's like that and he deserves a whole lotta love#also i just realized i used different name orders for kiryu and yayoi... sorry idk im just incapable of writing kazuma kiryu#uhOOPS POSTED IT EARLY NVM#yer gettin a loootta skrunk content today ig#skrunkart
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arctic-bookclub · 1 year ago
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i have a wild thought that i’m just throwing here so that y’all can do whatever you want with it
y’know how current blue team has two members working for the eye? forever, infected with the virus, and elquackity?and how they both were in the same team at the start?
what if the team they are in isn’t the cursed one but whoever the other team competing against them is? because if the team they are in wins and ”saves” the eggs, they can kill them at the eye’s command? what if red is the cursed team solely because red losing ensures the team with the traitors having the lives of the eggs in their hands?
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seventh-district · 6 months ago
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not even gonna tag this properly bc i don't wanna get Involved but i do have some Thoughts i need to get out into the void so here we go
(aaa quick edit: CW for mention/discussion of Boothill leaks)
#today's gone Badly and i'm upset but instead of venting abt it i'm gonna channel that energy into doing a bit of tag rambling abt Boothill#well. less abt Him and more abt uh. self-analyzing my anxiety surrounding contributing to fandoms. he's just today's catalyst#like. i know it's mostly a me thing. i'm hypersensitive to criticism and very conflict avoidant + socially anxious + perfectionistic etc.#so I'm the one that keeps myself from posting more stuff out of fear of being criticized or called-out for what i've made#bc inevitably Someone's gonna see it and think its OOC or a problematic take or they'll misread my intent. etc etc what have you#but like. that's inevitable. there's no way to communicate every single thing with all of the nuance required to avoid misunderstandings#and other times it's not a misunderstanding it's just a difference of opinions and that's Fine!! there's no accounting for personal taste#there's no accounting for several things actually. taste‚ bias‚ lore-knowledge‚ differing levels of chronic-online-ness‚ etc#so this isn't me complaining abt the state of fandom culture (although i do think. sometimes. ppl take shit a bit too seriously)#but anyways all of this is mostly just anxiety-fueled. it's not like i very often actually even receive negative feedback or anything#if anything ppl tend to tell me that i'm overthinking it and killing my own fun and worried that my stuff is more OOC than it is#which like. yeah. Yeah u right :) but that's just the way that i am! always losing the idgaf war i suppose#anyways what's Boothill got to do w this ur wondering. well. i've been thinking abt the quickly emerging concept that he's illiterate.#and it just. has me feeling a lot of ways. and watching ppl disagree over it has me feeling some Bad ways. bc it's def a loaded topic!#if you'll pardon the pun there. and i don't rlly have anything new to add other than that i'm conflicted abt it.#like yeah i saw the leaks days ago. of him mentioning 'not hitting the books' much as a child when we ask him why he sends voice messages#or voice Transcriptions ig. ykwim. and like. *braces for impact* ...i liked it? like. it doesn't feel right to call it endearing#i'm not trying to infantilize him. ok that's not the right word either but ugh. you know? what i mean?? who am i kidding even i don't know#it's not quite right to say that it feels like Representation either. but it's something close i guess#as a southern person myself who didn't receive a 'complete' education due to factors that weren't to do with my intelligence#the concept of seeing him as a capable force to be reckoned with and respected who also happens to have not received much formal education#i like that. i do. but there's so many issues w it at the same time. like. as i said‚ being southern myself has me Wary of the way Hoyo is-#writing him. as well as of the way that the fandom is taking the bits of his lore and running away w them. and i'm Very aware of how ppl-#will see a southern character and be All Too Eager to agree that they're lacking intelligence based on our Redneck™ stereotype#sigh. and before we even go too far with this. it's not even confirmed that hes completely illiterate. which is a valid criticism i've seen#there's Multiple reasons that could make him prefer voice to text. but regardless. i'm just worried that ppl will misconstrue my intentions#like. example: that edit i made the other day of him saying 'no thanks i can't read'. wasn't me playing into the stereotype of-#'haha dumb country boy can't read!' it was. in my eyes. something he'd say as a joke to make light of a potential insecurity#like. i think there's far more depth to Boothill's character if ppl could look past the surface. and i dont wanna contribute to the problem#but sometimes ppl Will have stereotypical traits and i wish the same could apply to characters as long as it's done Thoughtfully.
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alackofghosts · 2 years ago
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anyway. ardbear and bear of light
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a-dash-in-the-middle · 9 days ago
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wanting to visit the archives without looking like a fanatic bc nobody likes posting government documents online apparently
#this is why i hate politics people do shit without proof all the time#and they do it from the both sides so even if i hate one i have to look at the other one and be like please get some proof just because the#are known liars does not put you in a pure truth position simply by disagreeing with them and i really need to like you#so i have to dig for the information myself bc i am done jumping to conclusions after watching reels and then jumping to news articles#created either after the reel or by some random sentence somebody said and then it gets picked up by bigger news outlets#bc NOBODY FACT CHECKS ANYMORE its all abt speed first ig#so i have to check credentials i am not blind hating and fearing anymore#like my dad said information is the most valuable thing rn and the problem is when the government hides it#also get your party out of the protests<3#it is made by the citizens to fight injustice not to put you in charge you have to work on that yourself not by simply being -the others-#bc that is how we got into this mess in the first place#and it discredits the people's concerns so much bc now it's party moves and not citizen unhappiness with the system#which is a story they could not have spun if they did not get involved so clearly i mean dude#will not even going to get into the fucking embarrassing kind of gaslighting the government is doing#they are literally looking at photos and saying nuh uh when faced with bullet proof evidence and then bullshitting#which is so offensive bc at least fucking care enough to lie well but they know they can say the sky is green and they will still stay in#power so why give a fuck i guess#0 notes to me#i am sorry for the rant#i just have to let this off my chest somewhere
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danielnelsen · 9 months ago
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there’s so much i wanna do this week/month/etc but i’m just too sick, i have no energy, i can’t sleep, i’m constantly nauseous and headachey and on the verge of a migraine, i’m stressed and irritable and impatient and panicky…….how tf did i survive nearly 5 years of high school untreated if i can’t even manage this when i don’t have any major obligations rn
#at least i finally got my meds so hopefully i feel a little better soon#although i’m now on 20 pills per day which is Just Great#whenever i’m in remission it’s nice to just. forget sometimes that this can happen at any time#kinda wish i had the typical kinda chronic illness that people talk about with ‘flares’#or at least triggers that i can plan around#the other times have all had an easily identifiable stressor tho tbf. idk what caused this one#the first time was whooping cough and the next few were all very major life stressors like my cat dying right after i started uni#and i think also towards the end of my honours thesis?#but this…….there’s no major stress right now. nothing wildly beyond normal#i’m a little concerned about my joints tho. they’ve been so much worse than normal the last few months#so i’m kinda worried i’m developing rheumatoid arthritis (also an autoimmune disease and it runs in the family specifically)#so if that’s happening then it could set my thyroid off? probably should get to the doctor at some point#obv i’m seeing my endo for thyroid stuff. but i should see my gp and get her to run all the autoimmune blood tests again#i’ve done that before but it’s been a few years and my ankles and knees are so painful i can’t even walk properly a lot of the time#BUT I JUST WANNA DO THINGS I ENJOY AND I CANT AND I WILL CONTINUE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT IT#‘oh you’re so lucky you don’t have as many obligations because you’re chronically ill�� ha ha ha please swap lives with me immediately#personal#but seriously. i wasn’t diagnosed until i was nearly 17 and we can trace it back to whooping cough when i was 12#so it was the last half of year 6 and then all of years 7-10 and the start of year 11 of just being. uh. ‘very lazy and complaining a lot’#and TEACHERS joking about me and my sister (who was dealing with an arguably more severe undiagnosed disease) missing so many classes#wow so funny pdhpe teacher who’s supposed to be teaching is about health#and the thing with being a mentally ill teenager is that hyperthyroidism can just look like a very severe anxiety disorder#so i didn’t go to the dr until i was too sick to go to school at all. and luckily had a good dr who did a blood test#i’m just rambling now because i can’t sleep and i don’t wanna lie here doing nothing#might go play pvz or something. that’s been keeping me entertained
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starpros-sunshine · 2 hours ago
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You can use a lot of words you know? You don't have to talk yourself around stuff like "It's famous Nazi code for an abbreviation for their popular motto which I won't be repeating here" when you really can just explain that 88 is supposed to represent the Hitler salute because H is the 8th letter in the alphabet? You don't even have to say the words but I mean wouldn't it make more sense to actually explain something instead of vaguely talking around it for some sense of...of what? What's the use in nor calling the thing by it's name? Won't that do more harm than good? I mean if people know they shouldnt do something but don't really know why then they won't take it that serious no?
#sorry very stream of consciousness type of posting (and is there ever any other kind on this blog?)#and if it's about the actual word then you can use those uh#goose feet#the uh#'''''<- those#usually in text you put quotation marks yes thats the word around words with complicated historical connotations#thats how I've been tought at least#I'm not sure if that's how it goes in america but I've been tought that you never use words like the Nazi “the Jew'' without quotations#because they are historically and socially critical and in a text it would look like you're actually kind of a nazi yourself if you just#threw words around like that#yanno?#i think thats better than not using words because they might me triggering#i will respect it if asked of course but I'm not going to censor myself for the sake of seeming more sanitised or whatever#i hate that kind of trend that seems to be in media nowadays#whatwith unalive and grape and all#we have words for that. use them. do you not hear yourself. ''why are we glorifying corn on paper'' do you not feel shame writing like that?#it's all very. idk#almost performative it feels like#you know how I mean?#we're not going to say the evil evil words because people might be triggered (as if they'd be less triggered if you added one letter i don't#quite think thats how reading works) but are we actually going to fill the shoes we want to walk in and take the same attitudes#away from the Instagram comment section on a video of someone talking about zeus the mystical figure being depicted as attractive and#acusing them of glorifying a rapist when yeah no the guy was considered attractive can we stop conflating good looks with moriality can we#all just think?#like normal people?#some things you're just meant to be grossed out by why are we trying to make everything seem soft and harmless#''hes a pdf file'' grow a pair will you and talk in a way people will actually understand it's actually good if you're a little upset#by the idea of someone grooming kids that's a good response to have why are we tryinh to minimise that?#this got a tad beavy you don't have tk read until.here but if you did I'm sorry#I'm barely even awake i don't do well like tjis
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drinkingbitterboy · 9 months ago
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note to self: post more alex closet cosplays when i need a pick me up/ego boost.
thank you to everyone for being so nice to me 🥹
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trying to decipher if the overwhelming dread & Thoughts are cause of the state of the world or cause i need a shower.
vent post in the tags. idk. do whatever 👍
#sorry bros im about to ventpost in these mf tags 👍#im so fucking tired man. im already suicidal to begin with but the Everything happening is making it Worse. Yippe Yahoo Hooray.#therapy in a week though so ive got that at least.#this is the worst time of year for shit to go south.but Uh Oh saying that makes me feel like a selfish fuckass because other people -#- have it worse. like. god fucking damn. i get Extra suicidal around september -> march range sure. but other people are literally suffering#like as we fucking speak. and ive done fuckall to help cause i dont know HOW to help. but thats not a fucking excuse#im just being comfortable in my lazy ass depression spiral cause im a selfish fucking prick. “i cant spare the energy to vett things”#other people are fucking dying and im over here like “noo im too tiwed :( i cant do anyfing so im not gona do anyfing cuz im wazy and tiwed”#what the fuck is wrong with me lmao. knowing me im not gona change shit anyway despite fucking complaining about it cause im just. fucking#Like That.#idk. i was reblogging some of those “hold in there dont kill yourselves” posts cause like. yk. suicide bad or fucking whatever. but someone#on this site said something along the lines of “ok but how many people reblogging/posting these told jews to kill themselves” and like.#i dont know. i dont fucking know dude. so i guess im not reblogging Those anymore.#theres bigger issues out there and here i am focusing on some queer people who might kill themselves. idk. i should just join them yk#cause i never fucking focus on the bigger shit cause “i dont know how” and “i dont want to make things worse so i just wont do anything” so#im not doing fuckall other than just being part of the fucking problem here.#i should probably just delete social media for a while and see from there.#or just fucking drink about it thats the other option. its worked for me before (lie) so i may as well do it again am i right#im sorry i never like. boost gofundmes or fundraisers and shit i just.#i dont have a fucking excuse. im just a lazy fucking bastard in my own stupid fucking comfort circle.#“oh no seeing that people are dying makes me uncomforyable :(” ok well people are fucking dying you self absorbed douchebag. why cant you#get off your stupid fucking ass and do something. get a job so you can fucking help people or *something#its not like you have to pay rent and shit.#<- all about myself. cause yk. self centered douchbag. hooray.#i dont pay rent and i dont have to pay for my own food. i still live with my parents. im fucking useless to society so i may as well get a#job and send the money i dont fucking need to somrone who DOES need it. but here i am.#in.my stupid fucking bed til noon cause “the world is scary and jobs are hard :(”#its fucking retail. retail isnt as fucking hard as like. construction and shit but here i am anyway “unable” to do shit.#i fucking could if i just fucking ballsed up and put up with shit. but no. here i fucking am going “nooo i should just kill myself instead”#vent post
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tariah23 · 5 months ago
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The live action commercial celebrating the release of JJK VOL 27. Is so 😭!!!
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eats-the-stars · 2 months ago
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everybody who went to a private catholic school name the craziest personal belief an instructor lectured the class on.
i'll go first: mentally disabled people are free of original sin, just like animals, so they get a free pass to heaven
#bonus points if the lecture was not-so-subtly referencing you specifically#ye i was the only super obviously autistic kid in my class since we did not have special ed classes or accommodations of any kind#and yes this teacher did seem to believe that i fell into the category of 'mentally disabled people who are like animals'#oddly enough this kind of made me her favorite student#she was really big on infantilizing ppl who were a certain level of mentally disabled#and yeah i guess dehumanizing too#except like how people says 'all doggos are good boys'#and even if a dog bites someone you can't like claim that dogs know the difference between good or evil#so it's not like...a fucking sin or something#so yeah she did openly express this stuff in class#i can't remember her explanation for mentally disabled ppl being free of original sin#but it was like tied in with the whole 'tree of knowledge' thing#and how not having that knowledge/sin is what makes us like innocent and dumb#got compared to a dog and also a lamb. not directly. like she did not call me out by name#but the entire class was super uncomfy because it was really obvious she was indirectly talking about me#at the time i was also like 'huh that explains some of her behavior around me'#and also thought it was hilarious that i got a free pass to heaven in her mind#also thought it was funny that she thought i was mentally disabled#because at this point i just thought i was a deeply weird person being mistaken for a mentally disabled person#but uh nope. i was like. really autistic. like lots of classic negative shit too like biting other kids and self-harmful stims and stuff
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e-adlirez · 1 year ago
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Actually made a drabble this time
Summary says all, haha
If you need a bit of context, Professor Plotfur is a character from the Thea Stilton Mouseford Academy books, as part of the school's new Performing Arts department :3
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sysig · 7 months ago
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Still normal don’t even worry about it (Patreon)
#Doodles#ADHD#I was Very nice to my fixation - when it was fixated on the thing I wanted it to be lol#Honestly I wasn't even that mean about the two (2!!) other things it wanted to brain-focus on#Mad about it but in that dopamine way lol#''Can we please get dopamine from this thing and not those other things? Please'' ''Lol''#That is not an answer!#It is honestly still really interesting data :0#I've still never successfully forced a fixation but this is at least the second time I've continued a falling fixation#I wonder what the through-line is hahaha <knows the through-line#I was actually very resistant to fixating on the other things because my pride got in the way again lol#To the point where I didn't even write them down until recently pffft yeah that's how that works#''If I don't write them down then they don't count'' Uh Huh#Even if there are Some similarities to the last time I forcefully refixated there are still enough differences to make for interesting data#Like how the last time I had three in conflict did Not go well it was very rough on my brain - but this time was nice :D#Probably helps that the two-pair were kinda-sort from the same source so really I guess it Could be argued that it was just two in conflict#But I'm not counting it that way and since it's my brain and I make the rules that's what matters lol#The next set is one of the fixations you all saw the TV Guide for this week it's fine lol#The other - it's another video game but hmmm I might see about making fanart if/when I actually get to play it myself#It's very silly so I'm gonna hold onto it for a bit longer haha
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rotzaprachim · 2 years ago
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a wild flavor of tumblr user is a certain kind of white American self id’d leftist or commie who reblogs and posts things about I just think all liberals and centrists should DIE (*guillotine* meme) and then posts things needing to be nicer to demographics that vote 80% Republican and are very systemically involved in the structural and practical oppression of people of color and the whole US hegemony like brooo I get having a seriously messy relationship with your own cultural background but who are you talking about? Guillotining everyone at mawmaw’s thanksgiving?
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