#but she kept stalking him
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moonsaurora · 8 months ago
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i havent watched the doc but it’s all over my fyp so i know everything…and good lord. brian peck’s charges are actually INSANE. 16 months is not enough that mfer needs to be locked up for LIFE. that’s the least he deserves
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mylittleredgirl · 3 months ago
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great news everyone, by rewatching babylon 5 i have rediscovered the exact moment of my bisexual awakening and it was ten minutes and thirty seconds into the season two episode “spider in the web”
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(talia is witnessing the telepathic horrors as usual)
director of photography john c flinn i owe you about five years of sexual confusion
the scene above takes place in a dark alley and i don’t know how to color correct it (ancient prayer to the benevolent hardworking giffers of the universe 🙏), so here she is in a fully lit scene in the same episode so you can better appreciate what happened to me at a vulnerable age
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this is why i can never watch fox news btw because a proven cheat code for rewiring my brain is a platinum blonde in dark lipstick
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stardustedknuckles · 2 months ago
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My roommate's girlfriend (buzzed) and my roommate (blitzed) woke up to cats yowling in the alley last night right around the time I got home, and in a convincing display of her assertion that it's not CERTAIN we're getting a new cat soon (we are) my roommate asked if I wanted to go outside (it was midnight) and help them catch the one that seemed like maybe it was new to being outside. So I grabbed the carrier I've kept by the door in case our last project (Pete the tuxedo) came back (chewed a hole in the window screen and ran) and followed my roommate outside where her gf was lying on the ground with a tin of wet food trying to coax the cat from under the dumpster (nowhere near garbage day) and meowing (comfortingly?).
We ended up walk-chasing the cat down the street and Carolyn (roommate) actually got hands on her at one point, but the cat escaped (she didn't remember to zip the top of the carrier after she put the cat in) (this was when I realized she was drunk af and not just sleepy) so we spent another 20 minutes crawling around with phone flashlights on (still midnight) and eventually had to give up.
As we were walking back to the apartment (half a block away) I rolled a high enough perception check (permanent disadvantage due to adhd) to see that there was a man sitting nearly motionless in his SUV with all the lights off, lit only by the blue glow of his dash controls.
I said (quietly) "there's a whole-ass man who's been sitting in his car right here this entire time."
The other two (limbs a drunk and sweaty pretzel) processed this for a moment and giggled together. "oh well," said Julia (the toothpick keeping this thing together). "this is Chicago. He's seen weirder."
"oh for sure," I said, picking off leaf litter stuck to my elbow (humid). "I mean I feel like three lesbians chasing pussy at midnight is pretty normal around here anyway."
A (drunk) pause, then laughter so loud that something streaked from the bushes (cat) bolted across the road, and disappeared under a fence (welp).
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gravesung · 6 days ago
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curseless suguru is honestly gripping me so fucking hard In general tn. don't get me wrong, i love canon geto, but there's something about being able to explore him in a grounded setting without taking away his knowledge that there is something so so so so dark and rotten inside of him. what he thinks of it, what he does with it, depends heavily on catalysts and influences, which is why he ends up a relatively not-garbage person in musician/chef aus but goes down suuuuch a dark path in yakuza au.
but like... take his idol/producer verse for example. kenjaku (@harerazor <3) is still the head of the yakuza clan, but suguru got out early early — even so, everything he touches becomes potential collateral damage, and he knows that, but he touches anyway. in addition, though he's working freelance as a producer after his scandals kill his idol career, he's still working with an agency that produces idols in the same shitty way he was produced. he's perpetuating that cycle (until he breaks away with chiaki and helps her go solo-solo, but even so, the collateral damage issue...)
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cookinguptales · 2 months ago
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From the Halloween asks:
✨ - Best Halloween memory?
Ohhhhh hmm. I had a lot of fun trick-or-treating at Disney World while I was a teen, but admittedly the people I usually went with... make it less of a positive memory, in retrospect. One year we did all make homemade Lock, Shock, and Barrel masks and we looked fantastic. lmao
I also have really, really loved some of Sleep No More's Halloween parties, but I've never actually gone on Halloween proper, I don't think...
I lived on a floor full of Ancient Studies/Museum Studies majors when I was a freshman in college and we all watched The Mummy and wrapped each other up in toilet paper and that was fun, too...
Honestly, though, if it comes to like Pure Joy, there was this one year I went trick-or-treating with my best friend in Ohio. We were probably like... idk, 8? And it was the absolute apex of the Wonder Ball craze.
(For my non-American followers, they were sort of like Kinder Eggs but usually had toys relating to popular children's brands like Disney. The toy version was eventually made illegal here just like Kinder Eggs are, lmao. They replaced the toy with shitty candies.)
My dad never let me get one at the grocery store when he let me pick out a treat because they were so expensive (a whole dollar, lmao) so I desperately wanted one. They still had toys in them back then and everyone wanted one. But I'd never gotten one.
So Jody and I go trick-or-treating and we come to this quiet cul-de-sac that apparently no kids went to...? And there was this nice couple there who had clearly decided to go all-out for Halloween and they'd bought an entire box of Wonder Balls. Since no other kids had shown up, they let Jody and I take like five each and it was glorious.
I remember going back to her house and her dad had the Simpsons Halloween special on TV (fun for me as I was not allowed to watch The Simpsons back then) and we broke open our Wonder Balls and had a great night. :')
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folkloristico · 1 year ago
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been reading some weird takes on movie!Adrien and i gotta say, as much as you’re entitled to dislike him as much as you want, it’s very weird to frame him as the nice guy trope/as a misogynistic jerk with incel vibes for having called Ladybug his sidekick, when show!Chat Noir spent countless times trying to get Ladybug to reciprocate his feelings and got upset when she didn’t (which is exactly what ‘nice guys’ do btw).
“show!Adrien is nothing but nice!” if you cherry-pick what you like from the show, of course he is. if you cherry-pick what you didn’t like from the movie, of course Adrien comes off as a jerk. aside from the fact that the differences between show!Adrien and movie!Adrien are easily explained—the former basically grew up segregated in his own house; the latter didn’t—their difference doesn’t mean movie!Adrien isn’t kind or even a jerk. because he thought one time that Marinette was a little weird? well, she was. because he called her his sidekick? how is that any less troublesome than constantly hitting on her at inappropriate times, which is something Ladybug was clearly uncomfortable with during the entirety of season 1 and 2?
this isn’t me trying to salt on Adrien because i love him, but no matter where your stand on the movie vs show stuff, both versions of the main characters had their flaws and to state that movie!Adrien is a jerk for having dealt with his loneliness in a different way is very off-putting. also because people seem to have a very narrow definition of kindness according to which if you misbehave even once, you’re a bad person. people have been saying they don’t like movie!Adrien shutting people off as opposed to show!Adrien being eager to connect to other people, and while i get why that is, i do find it’s an understandable reaction—remember that movie!Adrien wasn’t kept from going to school and meeting new people, so he’s more used to it. still, the facts that sometimes he can be less of a ray of sunshine and more angsty doesn’t take away Adrien’s kindness.
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blunderpuff · 3 months ago
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apparently i have a half sister???
what the fuck???
#???#the secret world of merry mac#apparently my mom facebook-stalks her????? ''oh yeah she looks just like [your dad]'' ??????????#does she???? i don't know????? turns out i don't know what my dad looks like either i guess?????#i've always coasted through life thinking that everyone else has family drama but not me...#and now there's 2 whammo! situations in this one week right here#wham sitch no. 1: danny uninvited me to his wedding bc he's mad that i said Bad Words on the phone to him while i was driving#(we were supposed to meet at an exit on the freeway so i could hand over some stuff he'd left at my mom's house. literally the only info#he gave me was: ''meet me at Ridgegate Parkway exit'' and it turned out there's FUCKING NOTHING at that exit. there wasn't#anywhere to even pull over. no parking lots no nothing. so i was talk-to-texting and i'd already been driving for 6 hours and I HAD#KEPT HIM UPDATED AS TO WHERE I WAS so there was no lack of information on my part. APPARENTLY i was supposed to psychically#intuit that i should have gone to the Park N Ride parking lot off the exit. i did not intuit this and therefore had no idea i should have#been looking for that. so i was upset and driving around in circles in rush hour traffic in Lone Tree CO where everyone drives $50K#SUVs and they drive them aggressively. Danny of course thinks this is MY fault because i didn't pick up the phone to call him and#ask for more information apparently. reminder: i was driving. 99% of my driving was on the mf freeway doing 80mph. i wasn't going#to open the phone then open my contacts and then scroll down to his name and then make a call. talk to text was already dumb and#dangerous to do but it was a lot easier to glance at the phone or make it read a text to me than it was to make a phone call and play#20 Questions about where the fuck i was supposed to meet him.)#y'know if he had just said ''hey meet me at the Mod Pizza by the IKEA'' that would have been fine!! literally all the info i needed!#but noOo he had to be the smartest smuggest person in the chat and give me only partial information)#wham sitch no. 2: apparently i have an older half sister who looks just like our shared father. huh.
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dunadaan · 4 months ago
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i'm thinking about the time 4 years ago when i was rping with a girl and we shipped blackwall from da:i and créa and it was fun until her personal life exploded and ended our friendship. and right in the middle of that i had gotten a commission of our characters...and by the time the sketch came back from the artisti was like. welp. i dont even talk to that person anymore. but ill still pay you for this commission bc you worked hard on it and it really is beautiful
so now i have this really pretty commission for a ship i dont even ship anymore and have never posted anywhere LMFAO
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jewishbarbies · 1 year ago
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my mom has been very vocal about how much she doesn't like that i'm a horror fan for several years, and now she laughs when i mention anything about the Barbie movie because she "can't believe i like Barbie" since it's so different, like, if she only knew what i post about on the internet. oh boy.
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ostwitchsheart · 1 year ago
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Sorry to start complaining but its my tumblr
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2024skin · 1 year ago
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For 2 years I've been wondering which one of my best friends lied to me about the events surrounding their final breakup and I just fucking realized it was that moid. Always believe women 😭
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yourplaceinaugust · 1 year ago
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my sister and her boyfriend are so supportive of me it's amazing like if someone i was once friends with does awful things to me they both immediately hate that person and they're constantly encouraging me to ask out the cute guy at the dairy queen and every time we go thrifting they help me pick out cute clothes and encourage me to buy them like i appreciate them both so much
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didhewinkback · 2 years ago
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colton underwood put a tracker on his ex's car after she broke up with him & stalked her for weeks ... won't be forgetting that !
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my-thoughts-and-junk · 2 months ago
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once again in my rickard and mortyanne era. if you couldn't tell
#random thoughts#guess what motherfuckers it's blue man time#you ever think about how rick probably knows bp inside and out since he stitched him back together#he has literally been inside that man biblically#from seasons 1-3 it's really easy to tell they were originally planning for rick to have been divorced rather than a widow#and if you keep in mind abc's of beth that means he left after tommy got stuck in froopyland#but before beth got put in therapy for it because you know it was her mom who put her in therapy#since rick invented froopyland just to keep his daughter occupied i think he and diane were seperated at the time#which may be why beth struggles so much with leaving jerry#because in her eyes the divorce was what caused rick to leave her life which she then resented her mother for#and she doesn't want to be the reason her kids don't see their father and resent her for it#i think diane died either before summer was born or soon after#she was alive long enough to see beth and jerry wed i think. probably played a hand in planning it#which beth also resented her for because her wedding wasn't really about her at all#i think she died when summer was too young to remember her. probably shortly after morty was born#summer has a couple memories of her but they're more impressions than anything#she babysat while beth was in school and jerry worked#and wouldn't let her hear the end of it#she faked her death btw. was swept away by a space pirate. straight out of a bodice ripper#if her and rick ever met again he would shoot her fabio straight through the head right in front of her#he'd secretly be a bad guy and morty would be like 'gee rick how'd you know schmabio was a slave trader?'#and rick'd be like 'idk morty i'm just that good' (he didn't they were just arguing and schmabio made a point and looked smug)#(shot him right in his smug face)#i think the crew needs more friends. they need more reoccuring side characters#i am of the opinion jerry should have kept his job for longer and there should have been an office spoof#none of those characters would reappear again ofc because jerry would be fired soon after but he'd mention what they're up to in a sad#'i'm stalking them on facebook to feel like i'm still at work' way#morty should have more school-centric episodes. he should have friends his own age! who rick then isolates him from. tragic.#summer has like. two friends who need more screentime.#beth should also have her own office drama but it's about how she hates it and doesn't want it to affect her worklife
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arolesbianism · 4 months ago
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I should rly start eternal gales posting again I need to make sure the ppl who follow me know how much Tali and Aris make me to insane so that the isat au can have its full effect but alas I am allergic to drawing the human eg cast like 99% of the time and rn the only thing stopping that from being 100% is that I like fucking around with different art styles sometimes
#rat rambles#oc posting#eternal gales#honestly most of the times that Ive drawn them in recent memory has been either because I needed to remake their refs or because I wanted#to change smth abt my human artstyle and needed to use them as my test dummies since making dure Im still calable of drawing them is vital#shout out to them for forcing me to start learning how to draw humans so I could neglect to give them basic features for years until#something or another forced me to give them another facial feature#but nowadays they have successfully earned noses eyebrows ears eyebrows again noses again and also fingernails ig#maybe I should try to redraw some old eg art at some point that might be easier#but yeah aris and tali are the favorite children most of the time I love putting them through the horrors#longggg story short aris's mom was abusive towards both of their dad and that lead to him rebounding onto tali's mom and then tali's mom#died during childbirth and tali has a bunch of health issues which lead to him becoming even more depressed and stressed and that's on top#of his ex stalking him and harrasing him while abusing aris whenever she had custody and while eventually she lost custody she still kept#threatening their dad until he died when the two were lil kids and the two moved with their shared grandparents who took the death of their#son rly poorly and it sparked a bunch of conflict between them leading to them divorcing and aris chose to stay with her grandpa while tali#left with her grandma and the two didnt interact for years until they ended up in the same online friendgroup and had an awkward reunion#the two have a complicated relationship for many reasons but one of the roots of their disconnect is that aris' mom Hated tali and heavily#demonized her and tried very hard to drill it into tiny aris' head that both tali and her dad were people she was supposed to hate#and while aris never hated either of them she did feel the pressure like she was supposed to even after her mother was gone#and she felt even more that way after tali left leading to her feeling very uncomfortable upon her popping up again#tali on the other hand never had this but did have some resentment towards her for not coming with her as she tends to see aris as the last#remnant of the happy family she feels she was supposed to have but lost#and after her grandma died and she was left to go through some horrific shit alone that comfort that the idea of aris brought began to#override any anger she may have felt towards aris and she clung onto aris rly hard after the two reunited even if for the first few years#aris was deliberately distant most of the time#aris ends up being struck Hard by guilt once the two actually meet in person again during the main plot due to a variety of reasons#but the big initial one is that first moment she has where she goes wait. did she always have prostetic legs. uh oh.#tali getting to play that fun game where she lives in enough of a high tech environment to have fairly fancy prosthetic limbs but not w#enough for them to feel like more than a hinderence most of the time#theyre heavy and clunky and it sucks to try to clean them because she has to keep one arm on at all times and this has lead to infections
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mostly-imagines · 2 months ago
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La Vie en Rose
jason todd x fem!reader
aka jason wildly preferring you over everyone else
4 in 1 blurbs
warnings: standard batfam arguing etc.
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You sit curled up embarrassingly close to Jason on the couch, head on his shoulder. The team is still in their gear as they filter into the living room, masks and helmets discarded in scattered locations between here and the cave. The mission had been fairly simple and with all of them together it only took a couple hours to finish up.
As you waited, Alfred had kept your mind busy in the kitchen while he taught you how he makes his famous ice cream from scratch.
The clamor of the heroic party’s return had made itself known sooner than later, and you think your face must have displayed your emotions nicely because Alfred nodded you away with a small smile and no second thought.
You’d walked into the living room, weaving through the mess of siblings until a hand snuck out on your left and grabbed your wrist. You barely had time to look at him before Jason pulled you down to sit next him on the sofa. He wrapped an arm over your shoulder, pulling you in and leaving virtually no space between you. His armor sits heavy against you, but a welcome weight on your shoulders.
Tim plops down on the couch across from you and you can just make out a bit of blood on the side of his head, aptly accompanied by an irritated look sprawled across his face. It’s not enough blood to be concerned about—not for them—but you can venture a guess that whatever they were up to shouldn’t have called for any injuries and his pique is likely directly related to that.
Though Dick’s goading aura might have something to do with it too, as he comes crashing down next to him a second later, partially sitting on Tim’s cape and pulling him into an awkward angle. 
Nightwing doesn’t seem too perturbed by the younger vigilante’s agitation and curt manner of pushing him off.
The others are too caught up in chatter to pay much attention to you, and you can be certain that’s why Jason takes that moment to press a kiss to the side of your head. He lets his lips linger there for just a second as you lean into him.
Alfred’s own entrance is the only thing able to subside the flurry of conversations skirting around the room.
“A job well done,” he commends with a nod. “A selection of ice creams awaits you in the kitchen.”
He gives you a sly wink before retreating back through the swinging door, leaving Stephanie and Cass to practically trip over themselves trying to beat each other to the kitchen. Robin follows after unhurried, mask still on, with his hands behind his back.
Jason kneads your thigh before pushing himself up to stand. He turns back, looking down to you. “What do you want?” he asks softly.
You hum, "Just strawberry's good."
Tim sits up, "Can I—”
"No, you've got legs,” Jason grumbles, stalking off to the kitchen.
Dick barks out a laugh and you bite back a smile.
Tim looks absolutely aghast. 
“That’s such bullshit. You know, he used to be nice.”
“No he didn’t,” Dick laughs, shaking his head. “Not since you’ve known him.”
Stephanie stumbles out of the kitchen then, the door hitting her back on the way, as she mutters a curse behind her. You can vaguely makeout Jason grunting something back before she rolls her eyes.
Steph looks at you, shaking her head as she returns to her seat, “You live like this?”
You shrug, “He’s nice to me.”
“Yeah, I bet,” Tim grumbles.
Jason returns after Cass a minute later with a bowl of strawberry ice cream and two spoons. He expertly ignores Tim’s unwavering glare as he resituates himself beside you.
He scoops your legs up over his lap and positions the bowl in between you, wrapping the sleeve of his jacket around it so that the cold porcelain doesn’t make contact with your skin.
The others have set themselves up so that the four of them are stuffed up against each other on the sofa adjacent to you, very obviously examining you both. 
And while you’re willing to acknowledge the amused stares and singular glare, Jason only sighs heavily, rolling his eyes as he glares at the coffee table.
Only a few seconds of this are allowed to go by before he pulls over a throw pillow and sets it over your knees, so that it rests atop your heads like a mini-fort, successfully blocking out his siblings' view of the two of you.
You smile and press a light kiss to his shoulder as he simmers.
Regrettably, you miss the way Damian side-eyes the pillow above you as he re-enters the room, perching himself atop the back of the couch behind the others.
“This is so nice,” Dick preens. “He used to just leave the room when too many of us gathered in one place. Now he has to stay.”
Stephanie watches the makeshift fort with wary eyes, scooping ice cream into her mouth. “Yeah…I don’t wanna freak you guys out but, uh…”
It’s quiet for a moment and you guess Cass is speaking. 
You’re proven right when Stephanie starts up again, “My thoughts exactly.” Her voice drops into a raspy whisper that isn’t really meant to go unheard, “I don’t know who the hell that is, but it is not Jason.” 
“This is unprecedented,” Damian mumbles, dipping into his own chocolate cup.
“Do they always talk about you like you’re not here?” you ask Jason quietly. 
“Yes,” he grumbles with a scornful look directed at the bowl.
A low hiss can be heard immediately after, “I’ve never heard him whisper before, what the fuck?”
You can’t hide your laugh as well as you mean to, but you know Jason’s light swat to your thigh is nothing more than a rib.
Mumbles continue along the other couch, mostly going unacknowledged, until Tim busts out, “He doesn’t even like strawberry!”
Jason snaps the pillow out of the way, “The fuck do you know about what I like?”
Tim resets his posture with one hell of an attitude, snarking, “Well I can name one thing you really seem to fucking—”
Jason grabs the pillow harshly and chucks it at Tims head which connects with a loud thwack.
Damian swats it away before it can knock him off balance, though his scowl is only half worth what Tim’s is. 
“You’re unbelievable,��� he says with a sneer. “This is why you don’t get invited to movie night anymore.”
Jason doubles back at him, “Sorry, is this not your own fucking house?”
Tim huffs, “Yes, which i—”
“Then get your own goddamn ice cream!”
Tim huffs as he stands, sending Jason a pointed look. “I’m going because I want to.”
Jason barely gives him a sardonic nod as he stomps off.
“Get me some too!” Dick calls back, only for the back of his head to be met with a sideways grimace from Tim.
As he leaves, the focus of the room seems to shift towards Damian dripping chocolate onto his cape and it fades away from there.
You turn to Jason, lowering your voice to just below a whisper, “If you don’t like strawberry—”
“I like it,” he tells you, leaving no room to argue as he takes a bite.
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Voicemail. 
Voicemail.
Voicemail. 
Voicemail.
Declined.
Voicemail.
Declined.
Declined. 
“I swear to God, he better be dead,” Stephanie mutters to herself.
She shuts her phone off and tosses it into the passenger seat with a huff. Her fingers drum against the steering wheel as she scans the sidewalk across from her car.
The night before the majority of the team had been involved in a less-than-successful plan, which some have called “a display of complete idiocy and inability to circumspect.”
Then Tim had to go and make a joke about that word choice in what was apparently a bad moment. This gave way to a harsher punishment of the team being forced to clean the batcave foot by square foot—notably, an impossible task.
So naturally, they had to retaliate.
The plan was to dismantle the batmobile piece by piece and leave it a collection of parts for Bruce to find. Problem being, the group as it stood didn’t possess the capability to do so without doing a great deal of damage to the parts. Damage, that the family was not willing to face extra retribution for.
Fortunately, they knew just the man for the job. 
Unfortunately, said man has devoted his life to ignoring their messages, favoring to live peacefully and distantly from them. And because that peace and distance does come with an add-on of borderline complete secrecy from his family, no one had any idea where to look for him.
So, Stephanie decided to do the next most rational thing and track down your location. She’d hoped he would be with you like he always is, but for seemingly the first time in the last year—he’s nowhere to be found.
Now, was revenge for a minor-slight by Bruce so important that it required Stephanie to take all of these steps to get a hold of Jason? No, absolutely not. She’s pretty sure that the others have already given up on it by now and started cleaning. But it’s about the principal. And also, she does not want to clean the floors of a cave.
She jumps up in her seat when she spots you exiting a store, scurrying to unbuckle and pry the car door open.
She’s across the street in half a second, running directly into your line of sight. It actually would’ve been very difficult for her to miss your line of sight, considering she’d landed only a good six inches in front of your face. “Hey!”   
“Oh, fuck—” you jump, grabbing your chest. You take a breath when you realize who it is, less surprised now by the theatrics of the introduction. “Hey Steph.”
“Hey,” she smiles casually, like she didn’t do what she just did. “So Jason’s been ignoring us and I need to get a hold of him,” she tells you.
You nod, still collecting yourself. “Oh. I don’t know where he is—”
She shakes her head, “That’s fine. Can I use your phone to call him?”
You frown, “Is something wrong?”
“With him, yeah,” she snarks. “I called him, Tim called him, Dick called him, Cass called him, Damian called him, we used Bruce’s phone to call him—that was a bit of a long shot, but still. This is our last option. Well, not our last option, if this doesn’t work I could get really invasive, but—” She shakes the thought from her head, “Nevermind.”
You nod blankly, taking in the mountain of information she’d just handed you. “How’d you know I was here?”
She scans your eyes back and forth for a second before her own widen in realization and she’s shaking her head. “No, no, don’t worry we’re not tracking you! I just hacked into the traffic cameras to find you.”
“Oh!” you exclaim, nodding some more. “Okay.”
You hand her your phone without any further questions—for your own sake—and she happily accepts. 
“You know I texted him 115 times?” she tells you as she scrolls through your contacts.
You furrow your eyebrows, watching her click his name and press the phone to her ear. “Did you count?”
“Well, I had the time, di—you son of a bitch! One ring?” Stephanie scorns into the phone.
You can hear Jason groan on the other end of the line. 
He says something to Stephanie that she follows up with a firm shake of her head.
“No,” she says defiantly. “She let me use it.”
Stephanie rolls her eyes, not pleased with his response. “What if it was an emergency?”
She listens for a second, skeptical look on her face.
She gasps suddenly, “I am not overstepping, we thought you were dead!”
Over the course of about ten seconds the shock on her face drops into just-been-caught guilt. “Well, I mean we considered it.”
You imagine Jason’s telling her to give you your phone back as she stands her ground, pushing, “If you promise to text me back.”
A short response on his end.
“Promise to text me back!”
There’s a brief lull before she’s giving a self-satisfied nod and jostling your phone back into your hands. “Here ya go. Thanks, babe!” She smiles wide at you before jogging back across the street, not waiting for the cars.
You smile as you watch her go, putting the phone up to your ear, “Hey Jay.”
You can hear the relief on the other end of the line. “Hey sweetheart. You know if you see Steph in public, you can just walk away?”
“I’m not going to walk away from your family.” You look again across the street, “Also I don’t think that was an option for me this time.”
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“That thing is fucking scary.”
Cass smiles fondly, signing, “I think he’s cute.”
Tim eyes the way Salem traipses around his feet, yellow eyes staring up at him. “Why’s it even here?”
Jason rolls his eyes, continuing to scroll on his phone. “He’s hers. Deal with it.”
Tim scrunches up his mouth. “She knows I hate it. And she, unlike you, wouldn’t subject me to this just for the hell of it. So again I ask: why is it here?”
Jason huffs, looking up from his phone. “What do you want me to say? He wants to be.”
Tim scoffs at that, “‘It wants to be’? You’re the one who put it in the car.”
“No, I didn’t,” Jason says factually.
Tim looks at him sideways as Salem leaps onto Jason’s lap and nudges his hand up. Jason follows along as requested, petting the top of Salem’s head with an open palm. 
Tim squirms to the other side of the couch with a look of disgust on his face. Salem watches him the whole time.  
A smile adorns Cass’ face as she signs, “She says he can read people’s energy.”
Tim huffs, resting his head against his fist. “What does that even mean?”
The conversation is cut off by the clatter of you and Dick stumbling into the room, carrying a freshly painted headboard. Blue paint coats both of your hands and has no doubt stained your clothes.
You’re clearly struggling a bit to keep your grip on your end, the weight of the wooden frame dragging your arms down.
Jason stands and Salem flows along with his movements easily, leaping down onto the hardwood. He comes over and helps you lift your end of the frame with a stupid amount of ease, to the point that you’re not even holding any of the weight up anymore. The three of you—less so you—move the headboard and lean it up against the wall. After it's set down Jason steps back and looks over it gingerly.
“It looks good,” he murmurs to you, quiet enough to not give his brother the satisfaction of his approval.
Dick had asked you over to help him paint Damian’s bed frame as a surprise for him for not getting in any “altercations” at school this semester. You’d decided on coating it with his favorite color first and then fill it in with a collection of what Dick has “on good authority” are his favorite animals. It’s a fairly random assortment that you’re not sure adds to or disproves Dick’s credibility. You’d spent the better half of the afternoon googling animals you’d never heard of just to make sure you projected their likenesses accurately. Dick had been very clear that you had to be precise on the details because Damian would know if he was really looking at a komodo dragon painting or if it was “some common lizard.”
You sigh, “I hope he likes it. I’m worried we did it too childish for him.”
“He is a child,” Jason says plainly.
“But he is not childish,” you counter. And he sure isn’t. You’d had a hard enough time convincing Damian to watch cartoons, adding a colorful animal mural to his bedroom might be one step too far. You’re still trying to figure him out.
“He’ll like it,” he says firmly.
You smile, slipping around under his arm and tucking yourself into his side.
Not a moment later, Dick slings an arm around Jason's shoulder, grinning as he pulls his brother in close.
Jason’s immediately louring. "No, get away from me."
Dick, unfazed and still smiling, removes his arm and takes a big step to the right. You do the same, figuring he needs his space, but you get caught by the wrist before you can do more than sway to the side. 
“Not you.” 
He pulls you back under his arm, wrapping it around the front of your shoulders. You hook your fingers around his forearm, letting your hand hang.
You hear a double-clap from the other side of the room that has you both turning around to face Cass. 
She signs something to Jason with a fond smile on her face. 
You look back and forth between them as Jason waves her off. “What?”
He shakes his head, “It’s nothing. She said—she said we’re cute.”
You smile up at him and he deflects—not so subtly—and starts nudging you back towards where the group is gathered, now all standing. 
Dick’s quick to start bragging off to the room about how great of a job the two of you did and how really complex and daunting it actually is painting animals for a child.
As he talks, your eyes find Jason, who’s definitely about to roll his eyes any second now. A bit subconsciously, your hand comes up to brush Jason’s white streak of hair back, away from tickling his forehead. 
On the other side of Jason, Tim does the same, sweeping Jason’s hair back in a much more mocking manner. 
This gives way to Jason smacking his hand away, harder than he needed to.
"Wha—You let her do it!" Tim protests, overplaying how much the slap hurt.
Jason scowls, "She can do whatever she wants."
Tim drops his shoulders, looking at Jason as if he’d been scandalized. “Oh but I can’t?”
“Not if it involves touching me,” Jason grumbles.
Tim steps closer, putting a finger to Jason’s chest. “You’re such a—”
From the floor, Salem hisses up at Tim, successfully startling the teenager. “Auahh—”
He stumbles backwards, grimacing at the cat. 
“Fucking demon,” he hisses, walking away.
When Tim’s far enough away and Salem’s seemingly satisfied, he brushes up against your leg, purring. 
You peer down at him with a furrowed brow. 
“What’s Salem doing here?”
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“I’m not doing this shit with you.”
“No, come on, 9 out of 10 times is what you said. How ‘bout just once? Beat me one time at anything, Jaybird.”
“Anything?” Jason asks like he knows damn well Dick can’t swear on that word.
Rightly so, Dick backtracks. “Something agreed upon.”
Jason throws his hands up, partially in exasperation, partially relenting.
Dick smoothly turns his back to him, announcing, “Opening up the room for ideas.”
Damian’s eye roll is almost audible from the corner armchair, where his attention is unmoved from intently sharpening a blade he’d recently come into possession of.
Bruce similarly remains unbothered in his seat, trying to read despite the distractions. 
“Ooh, okay. Okay.” Stephanie wiggles up a little on the couch. “You could race!”
Dick shakes his head negatively, “I literally just busted my knee up two days ago, Steph.”
“Convenient,” Jason mumbles.
“You were there!” Dick exclaims with an open mouth.
Steph continues, “Um…”
Cass waves to the room from her position upside down on the couch, head hanging down next to Stephanie’s legs. Attention successfully acquired, she signs, “Staring contest.”
Jason grimaces, “That sounds like a nightmare.”
Dick gives him a faux-smile.
“You should play chicken,” Damian chimes in, holding up his knife.
“No,” Bruce drones monotonously as he flips a page. 
“Tic tac toe?” Steph suggests.
Cass is already shaking her head as she scrunches up her mouth in thought.  
Jason rolls his eyes, “What are we, five?”
Dick nods, cracking his knuckles as he thinks. “No, we need something that really proves our worth.”
Bruce looks up from his book, staring numbly through his brow, but remains silent.
“You could arm wrestle,” Steph suggests.
The elder brother twitches at that, “Uh, no.”
Cass moves past that before a joke has the chance to be made. “Handstand contest?” she suggests.
Jason shrugs, “Yeah, sure.”
The elder brother looks at him incredulously. “You’ll do a handstand contest with me?”
“That’s what I just said.”
Dick scoffs, “Jaybird, I’m an acrobat, you’re just some guy.”
Jason, not giving him the courtesy of eye contact, pulls his sweatshirt off from his back. “Well, you’re a lot of things, aren’t you?”
Dick throws his head back with a squint.
Jason fishes his phone out of his pocket and Dick follows suit, offended stare maintaining all the while. 
No exchange is required as they both toss their phones across the room, landing together with a rough clatter on Damian’s lap. Damian’s resulting glare is borderline disgusted.
Dick starts them off, “Alright, go. One…two…”
Both men push up onto their hands, muscles flexing as they find their balance. Dick’s form is better, of course, but Jason looks to have a stronger foundation.   
They both hold strong as several minutes go by with the brothers only maintaining the attention of some of the room, and the interest of none of it.
Stephanie huffs and tilts her head, thoroughly unentertained with the consistency they’re both managing. 
“Starting to wish they’d picked something that moved along a little faster,” she murmurs to Cass.
Dick glances over at the younger brother, clearly displeased with his lack of trouble keeping up with him. He shuffles closer one hand at a time, using the decreased distance to poke at Jason with his foot, trying to knock him over.
Jason kicks him back harder, “Hey! Don’t be a dick—”
“Very funny,” Dick leers.
They both end up finding a struggle to keep balance and are forced to mind their own.  
A chime rings out from the corner that has heads turning briefly in his direction before coming back to the competition. 
“Whose was that?” Dick calls out.
Damian leans over and inspects the screens with disinterest. “Todd’s.”
Jason adjusts his position, “Who is it?”
Damian responds with your name. 
“And?”
He picks up the phone shrugging like he couldn’t care less, “She wants to know if you want to go see some movie.”
There’s a brief silence before Jason drops out of the handstand, standing up. 
Dick’s blood-flushed face peers up at him, bewildered. “Wait, what?”
The family watches with wide eyes as Jason picks his sweatshirt up off the floor and tugs it back on.
Stephanie gawks, bordering on laughing. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah,” he says simply.
Dick lets himself fall into a kneeling position with a huff, “You would rather go to some movie you don’t even know the name of than win a bet?”
Jason moues at him, “Uh, yeah.”
He tosses a twenty at Dick, and plucks his phone from Damian’s hand as he strolls past him, typing out a reply.
Cass sits up a bit and signs up to Stephanie, “Does he even like movies?” 
Bruce, now attention now fully removed from his book, watches Jason exit with the slightest hint of a smile. Dick sits dumbly on the floor, staring after him with an open-mouth. 
Damian twists the knife in his hands around contemplatively before rising to stand. 
“I will go,” he announces, dropping his blade onto the seat of the chair. Jason grumbles a no but Damian follows after him just the same.
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you know what happened to the last guy that didn’t reblog? … 🔪🧨💥😵⚰️🪦
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