#but make out scenes may not be for everyone soooooo

[tadc-harlequin-au]

Touch-Starved (canon)

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otherwise known as; the part where The Puppetmaster finds out he has THE FEELINGS(™, patent pending) for the Combat Harlequin. lmfao

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"Almost..." His hand trembled at the last piece required. He carefully slotted the optics in place, and twisted the eye multiple times to stick it in place. Within moments, he steps back, and Bubble flared up alive again, checking out his new, updated vision. “Wow! I can see more colors now!” The Blimp spun in place.

“Those new eyes should allow you to broadcast anything you see to me, if I so wished.” He explains, pulling out a small, thin black screen from one of the the desk’s many compartment. He switches it on, and Bubble’s eyes suddenly have a tiny red dot blinking in the middle of it.

So far, so good. The device was working as intended and he could see the top of his dentures from Bubble’s perspective, making Caine grin proudly.

“You may proceed to do your chores once more, the upgrades are done.” He sends the blimp to his merry way, and Bubble only nods before turning away to make his way out of the office. He leans back with a content sigh and closed eyes, satisfied with the work done for the day.

At that very moment, Pomni also opens the door.

She looked… disheveled, to say the least.

“Oh hey Pomni!” The butler blimp greeted with his usual reply. The Harlequin only sent him a look of acknowledgement, knowing that it’s useless to try to spark up a conversation, as Bubble was already making his way out.

Caine blinked once, and then he blinked twice just to make sure he’s seeing things right.

Was she always this… dazzling? Literally? He could see sparkles forming everywhere.

She flipped her hair in a messy attempt to get rid of the strands currently stuck to the skin of her nape. Her trademark golden ponytail missing, most likely a B.O.S.S.’s doing. She made her way to Caine’s desk and he swears he could feel his heart beat faster and faster with each step she took. The Harlequin’s trademark squinted brows with half-lidded eyes meeting his own wide stare, a gaze that would typically make any person with a still-functioning sanity cower in fear.

She took a seat on his desk with her legs crossed and her back turned against him and leaning on her right arm, as she usually did.

“Here’s the die you asked for. Took me a bit, but still got the job done.” She checked her left arm for damages after she placed the multi-colored puppet heart in front of him, while she flashed her teeth with a victorious, smug smile. His words are caught in his throat and her entirety shines too brightly for him. He couldn’t understand it.

Why… did she seem like a flame, and he felt like an unsuspecting moth, drawn to her light?

He shook his head clear and forced his stare away from her direction, clearing his throat while clutching the die. “I-I see, thank you, Pomni. You-you’ve done… a… wonderful…” Her hand grasped his own and his heart leapt at his own throat. Her synthetic, calloused fingers felt so rough, yet so gentle against his own gloved ones that he considered taking them off.

“...j-job.” His breath hitched as he struggled to finish the end of his sentence, unable to tear his attention away from her eyes. He found himself gawking at her intense, golden eye matched with blue and red pinwheel ones.

“Aren't you forgetting something, Puppetmaster?” Her expression questioning, yet with a slight and subtle undertone of mischief glinted at her optics. 

He couldn’t speak. He struggled to form coherent words. It felt like he was being strangled by an unknown force clutching at his neck, yet there was clearly no malice behind it. 

“Wh… What am I forgetting…?” He asked in such a feeble tone that made her chuckle in such a low rumbling tone, snaring his full attention.

“Well, I think that I deserve a reward for my services. Don’t you think?” She stands up. Warm hands suddenly felt so cold and empty, and already he missed the warmth present just about a second ago. The Harlequin made her way towards him as he spun his chair to meet her halfway. Hand at her hips as she towered over his sitting form. He’s all of a sudden clutching at the armrest so intensely.

“Y-yes, of course! H-how could I forget!” He nervously chuckles, he would pull on his collar right about now. “What is it you wish to be rewarded with?”

He offers her his best smile, and she giggles as she shakes her head. Without any warning, she took a seat on his lap, and he went frozen. As if making one single move would shatter the very fabric of the universe. She leaned her head to his shoulder, fiddling with the collar of his shirt then her fingers trailed onto the underside of his chin to make him look at her. He shivered from the contact.

“You.”

He trembled as his face warmed up to uncontrollable degrees, and produced visible heat waves. Not even his self-installed coolants were helping him tone down the sudden rise in his body temperature in the slightest. He couldn’t control his shakes, making the Harlequin smirk, knowing that she had the Puppetmaster all wrapped around her finger.

He didn’t know what came over him, because now his own hands were making their way onto her thighs to pull her closer to him entirely, the other shakingly placing itself onto her shoulders and he could feel the way she sighs contentedly against his touch. He exhales a shaky breath himself, attempting to steel himself.

“M-my dear, a-are you positive that… that is what you’d like?”

It was better to be safe than sorry. She sits up straight, and for the first time, he regrets ever asking that question in the first place.

“Actually…” Her voice trails off playfully, while she stands up. “... Maybe I’d like something more.”

It only took her a finger underneath his chin to pull him as she leads him to a nearby wall. As if his own body had a mind of it’s own, he pins her in place with both arms adjacent to her head. His face leans in closer and closer to her with eyes closed, and she’s leaning up close to him, fully ready to accept his advances.

Pomni’s soft lips met his teeth, and Caine could smell the faint traces of grass and sweat rolling down from her synthetic skin, evident of her hardships from the recent battle. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and his loops around her waist to pull her closer, while the other cups at her face intensely. He savored her mouth as their breathing became heavy and fast-paced, only breaking apart for a mere second, gasping for air before delving back in to their desires.

Desire…

Quite the accurate depiction of how Caine truly felt for the Harlequin at this moment. He couldn’t quite decipher when this had started, though.

As if her intentions were to pry him away from his overbearing and unnecessary thoughts, Pomni pushed him away to pin him to the wall this time, continuing the liplock. He grunts from the impact, but gladly returns her enthusiasm with fervor as he loops his arm around her back, pulling her flush to him once more. Her hands made their way to the lower sides of his jaw to caress so gently, and he finds himself melting at every contact their touches made.

Without breaking the teeth-on-lip-lock, he steered their bodies onto the direction of his desk, leaving the Harlequin laying on it as he loomed over her, ravaging her mouth once more like the touch-starved man he was. He adjusted her thighs just enough to make room for him without making the position uncomfortable for the both of them, their heated make out session felt like it could go on forever as he gripped her waist tightly.

It felt like if he let her go, she would disappear all of a sudden. And he didn’t want that.

He made sure to not lean too much of his body weight onto her by propping himself up with his elbows, both hands find themselves cupping her face to keep her in place as her hands trailed all the way up from the lower arms to his shoulders to do the same to him. He broke the kiss to gasp for air, a string of saliva being the clear proof of their heated action, but quickly delved back into the riveting sensations of their activity. 

Her touch against him were like magic; every contact sent shivers and jolts down his spine as she switched from holding his shoulders to holding his chest just above where a collarbone would traditionally be, pushing him away to let herself up. For a nanosecond he thought that maybe he went a little too far with his advances, until she disproved his theory by shoving him to one of the nearby long couches, only a pillow to cushion and soften his landing onto the furniture.

Quickly making up for lost time and contact, she quickly crawls to straddle his waist, clutching the back of his head to make him look at her, and her only. His hand found itself gripping at the back of her waist tightly once more, the other clutching her own head just to make sure she’s still there with him. Both were panting heavily, the room temperature very much heated as a result of their affairs.

His eyes looked at her longingly as he breathed heavily. “Pomni… I… I don’t think I want this to end.”

She flashed him a consoling smile.

The alarm rings, deafening the surroundings as he jolts awake, falling from his chair comically with a loud, slightly high-pitched scream emitting from his throat. He groans from the headache he had received from the impact to the ground, clutching at the top sides of his jaw, as he leans his head onto the desk for support.

His false heart was beating faster than when one would run; His face was flushed and he frustratingly ignores the heat from the rest of his body with a grumble.

He shifts his eyes to look around. Nothing’s changed. Everything was the same since Bubble left to do his daily chores.

He shakes his head and slams his face down onto the elegant desk, groaning depressingly and half-sobbing.

What the fuck? Was… WAS IT ALL JUST A DAMN DREAM!?

Oh, he could scream and cry into a pillow right about now. But the panicked angry screaming of a certain someone being bothered by the recent addition; the Ragdoll Mannequin that was “Ragatha”, suddenly grabs his attention. Now, he’s looking outside into the manor grounds from his office’s windows with a tired and questioning gaze.

“GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!”

“But Mistress! You still haven’t tried out my trademark cookie recipe!! It’s GUARANTEED to be your instant favorite!”

“STOP CALLING ME MISTRESS! FOR THE LAST TIME, I DON’T CARE, GET THE FUCK AWAY-”

Caine sighed disappointingly to himself, dragging his hand across his eyes.

God fucking dammit. He actually feels something for her.

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I would say I'm sorry, but we all know I'm not. :)

[erraticalart]

Saw Fortress II

Well, is this what you've been waiting for?

So, as some of you may or may not know, Saw is getting a new movie, Saw X, in two days and I'm so excited for it to come out! I decided to pay tribute to this movie by making a crossover between Saw and, of course, Team Fortress 2. I've been getting interested and invested in the Saw franchise, from its story to the characters and especially the creative but deadly traps. Took me about 22 days to create as I had classes and needed to take breaks every once in a while, but I finally finished it and presented it to my brother as a birthday gift (as well as an official Fallout cookbook).

Now, for the fans of both Saw and TF2, I'll explain the reason why I chose the characters and their designated roles. It's time to play a game.

Character Comparison and Roles

Warning: Spoilers for the Saw franchise

RED Engineer: John Kramer aka Jigsaw - Well it's pretty much obvious why. They're both engineers. They both are talented in creating many different unique contraptions that are beneficial, but deadly and dangerous. Engie also has his morals, although it's way different from John's. Let's not forget that Engie can be somewhat a little sadistic and loves seeing his enemies go down, although John hates sadistic people despite the irony in his traps. Also, are we gonna ignore his Gunslinger taunt kill and his sinister, evil laugh? I'm not sure if Engie should have the Gunslinger with him, but I think it would be pretty cool to have it on him. Maybe in this version when he attempts to commit suicide and fails, but all he's left is a completely maimed hand, he cuts it off entirely and replaces it. It would be a pretty cool backstory as to why he has it and would make a really cool reveal to show to the audience. I wonder what Engie sounds like saying the iconic line "Game Over"?

BLU Medic: Dr. Lawrence Gordon - It's also pretty obvious why. He's a doctor. (Can you guess the reference?) Dr. Gordon is my favorite character in the series, and I love seeing the change and progress in his character from a doctor and trap victim in the first Saw film to John's favorable accomplice and in his words, "My greatest asset" in Saw 3D/Saw: The Final Chapter/ Saw VII (Yeah, I can't believe that movie has multiple names). In a way, it makes sense to have Medic as Dr. Gordon because just like how it was shown at the end of Saw VII that he and John worked great together, Medic and Engie are also seen working together in Expiration Date as lab partners. They both would work great as an amazing sadistic duo. Also, I think it's kind of cute to have Engie give Medic a prosthetic foot after he too cuts it off entirely. Not only would it make sense because Engie knows a thing or two about prosthetics, but it would show that Medic and Engie both have something in common: cut off what's unnecessary to help with your survival. Medic would also try to justify and reason Engie's actions. Also, I love Dr. Gordon's "Game Over" line, it's soooooo good!!! It's my personal favorite (Of course nothing beats John's iconic classic version). I could totally imagine how great Medic would sound saying that line!

BLU Spy: Detective Lieutenant Mark Hoffman - Ok, this is where things start to get a little interesting. Hoffman became John's accomplice after replicating his ideas and making his own traps that John never made himself. In a way, he's becoming Jigsaw. Just like how Spy can become and replicate any class, Hoffman also became more mysterious and secretive to his fellow colleagues and tried to frame Special Agent Peter Strahm as Jigsaw. In the end, when he gets caught, he goes against everyone and executes them, so the secret never comes out. Also, another reason why Spy is Hoffman and please tell me if I'm not the only one here who thought this when watching Saw: Did anyone else get Hoffman and Strahm mixed up because they almost look like the same person and it's always confusing when there's a scene that focuses on one of them but it's actually the other? I decided to have two Spies in the story with the BLU Spy as Hoffman and the RED Spy as Strahm since they look the same minus the color.

Miss Pauling: Amanda Young - You're probably thinking, "Why her? Is it because she just so happens to be female and I just filled her in that role?" Well yes, but actually no. It's because Amanda was very loyal to John, looking up to him, defending him constantly, and was very close to him. Miss Pauling fits that role when it comes to the Administrator, but here she's loyal to Engie. I feel like she likes Engie the most out of any other class, so she would definitely help him out as well as get advice from him. She also can get shit done when being asked to accomplish a task. Sadly, we know what's to come for Amanda. Just like how in the comics Miss Pauling fails to bring the Australium, Amanda fails in John's tasks as he reveals to her that she's part of another game. I do feel like Miss Pauling was stuck playing around in the Administrator's game and it was also implied that every year the Administrator sends people to assassinate her to see if she succeeds as if it's an employee review. So, yeah, Miss Pauling and Amanda both are stuck in pretty tight situations.

RED Pyro: Billy the Puppet - Ah, yes, who could we ever forget? The main icon of the series. Both Pyro and Billy have terrifying appearances that'll leave you quivering on sleepless nights. I used to fear Billy as a kid, but now I see him as endearing and strangely, but freakishly, adorable. Pyro is freaky-looking, but he's such an adorable bundle of flames. I could definitely imagine seeing Pyro riding on Billy's iconic tricycle. That would be so funny, cute, and scary. As for Pyro's voice, since Billy is voiced by John (and Hoffman, I think? Idk), I'm not sure if Engie (or Spy) should voice Pyro since Pyro speaks in muffles. Maybe they should, idk. I also don't know if Pyro should speak in mumbles from time to time or whether he should have the ability to move and just walk around or just remain seated. And, of course, I don't know if Pyro should do his iconic laugh (maybe sometimes, idk). What I do know however is that Pyro should definitely have the iconic Billy laugh.

RED Balloonicorn/The Combustible Cutie Cosmetic (Yeah, I know it's pink, but it's the RED team's version which is why it's pink): Pighead Mask - Oink! Or in this case, Neigh! The mask that John and his accomplices dress up as with the iconic robe (though I'm not sure if this robe should remain red and black or pink and black, maybe the first option should be for Engie since he's the leader while the accomplices get the latter, or not, maybe they should match Engie, idk). At first, I chose Balloonicorn since it's related to Pyro and I know he'll love seeing everyone dress up as one, but then I remembered that there's a cosmetic for Pyro as a mask called "The Combustible Cutie" that resembles Balloonicorn, and boy does that mask look freaking scary!!! It's really fitting for both Saw and TF2 as a whole! It's pretty funny and scary to imagine getting kidnapped by a herd of pink unicorns all because you've been very naughty.

I hope fans of Saw and Team Fortress 2 enjoy this lovely piece of fanart as this has become one of my all-time favorites to create. I was also listening to the Saw soundtrack specifically the Zepp/Main Saw Themes. My favorite being, of course, "Hello Zepp". It fits Engie and John's character theme even though it's Zepp's (although you can argue that it IS John's since it's his perspective since he's saying hello, which I agree). But my actual favorite is "Zepp Overture" because to me it sounds like a holy church. I especially like the way the string instruments sound. Yeah, I know you can argue that Dr. Gordon has a theme at the end of Saw VII called "Dr. Gordon Montage" and "The Final Zepp" but to me, I think this theme fits Medic the best because, y'know, he replicates that sound by playing an actual saw when you taunt which is both funny and adorable. And it really fits his character to be seen as a holier-than-thou and especially a God. This might also fit Spy, but idk. I'm not sure which themes work for Spy and Miss Pauling or even Pyro (if you want Pyro and Engie to share the same theme, then that's fine by me). I might need to go back and listen to all of them depending on the movies that Hoffman and Amanda appear in. Maybe some of you can suggest one. But anyway, please go listen to the Saw soundtrack, especially the Zepp/Main Saw Themes, it's soooooo good!!! I might as well argue that it's one of, if not, THE best horror themes out there!!!

Here's a link to listen to it while you look at the art or whether you are interested in the Saw series and its music:

Welp, like I said before, I hope you fans enjoy it!!! I just can't' wait for Saw X to come out soon on September 29!!! I just hope and pray the movie is good though. Well, let's just wait and see. But until then,

GAME OVER!

[angst-is-love-angst-is-life]

Can you recommend me some good fics where Barry Allen gets kidnapped :) since in one of your tags you said you read a lot of them lol

I read them, I write them, I live and breathe them. Absolutely anon, allow me to dive into my bookmarks.

Just a reminder, always be sure to check the tags and warnings to know what you're getting into. Stay safe out there folks!

Juncture by @pennflinn may be my favorite fic of all time. Technically he gets kidnapped before the story's events but that's because it's an alternate ending to Escape from Earth-2 (and he is held captive for pretty much the entire fic so). The whump is SUPREME and the overall story is so well written. I will always recommend this fic.

One Second by pennflinn. Another one by penn because she is an incredible writer and HOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS FIC!! It takes my favorite premise for a fic "What if Barry was kidnapped in this scene/episode when he wasn't in canon!" and brings it to a WHOLE nother level. This one is diverges from 1x14 "Fallout" where, instead of everyone getting away semi-safely, Eiling kidnaps Barry and whump ensures. BUT there's another twist to this fic that (in my opinion) makes it stand out from many others-- every once in a while, there's a glimpse of a parallel universe where the events were different and let's just say some of those universes h u r t. Also, I wanted to kill Eiling so bad after reading this that I wrote a ficlet with the sole purpose of murdering him :) Anyways, go read; it's amazing.

Miles Through The Night by @hedgiwithapen. First off, this is an everyone whump fic, Barry is not the only one who is kidnapped but 1. IT HURTS GODS IT HURTS SO BAD I'M DYING. 2. The writing is spectacular, all the characters are super well done, and the story is INTENSE I'M STILL DYING SORRY I'LL STOP NOW. In this one-- actually nvm, the actual summary will do it justice. "With Eobard Thawne dead, life in Central City can go back to normalish. But Barry’s greatest enemy is not a speedster from the future fixated on him, and Eobard’s threat may have been the only thing keeping Team Flash safe from someone who doesn’t consider any meta to be human." THAT'S RIGHT-- AN EILING FIC! Just. Go read it, it's so good and I'm dying.

Lightning Bug by Hedgi. The writing in this was SUPERB and Eiling is a fucking bastard as always (count your days general.). And this time we have another speedster in the mix-- a toddler Wally! Ngl, I just reread this while getting the link and it was SO GOOD-- and once again my words can't seem to do it justice so I'll leave you with the summary "Months after the defeat of Zoom, Barry's main concern (aside from the odd metahuman attack) is helping Joe and Iris raise the four and a half year old Speedster Wally West, Cisco-named "Lightning Bug." And while that's hard, it's nice to have this speedster as family, not an enemy. Things are pretty easy.

Unfortunately, that doesn't last. After all, General Eiling's deal was only good for as long as their mutual enemies were still a threat." Eiling needs to die in a ditch as you can see, but there's some really sweet whump in this and it's because of him soooooo-- anyways, go read; it was fantastic.

Can’t Take That Away From Me by SophiaCatherine (or @sophiainspace on here). DUDE. DUDE DUDE DUDE-- I LOVE THIS FIC. I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS FIC. EVen once the whump passes, the A N G S T is so delicious! From the beginning of the first chapter alone; you'll see the sweet whump AND angst this fic has in store. Oh, and it's Coldflash which I somehow forgot to mention even though that's a foundation of the entire fic lmao. I love it, go read. Also, there is a sequel but it's not Barry being whumped this time... double also; there's a prequel and it's really sweet (no whump in that one fyi)

I Never Told Him by messedupstargazer. I am SCREAMING. THIS. FIC. Fyi, it's Coldflash. SO MUCH ANGST THE WHUMP-- IT'S SO GOOD I HAVE NO WORDS. DYING DYING DYING I AM DEAD I HAVE PERISHED.

Looking through all of these at once has filled me with many emotions and I apologize if some parts were incoherent. I'm probably missing a few and may add more as I find them but for now I'll finish with these two I wrote.

12 hours Barry's kidnapped before the events of the story but I think it still counts. He's trapped in Zoom's lair and forced to run for twelve hours every day :)

Trophy this is my beloved and the entire fic is a Barry whump fest (and angst. a lot of angst.). (or will be, There's one chapter posted atm) Technically we haven't seen the kidnapping yet but in the first scene he is in a cell so. Premise is that Zoom wins in the season 2 finale and everything goes to hell from there. I do feel obligated to warn though that there's not a happy ending for this one.

Thanks for asking! I'm always eager to share Barry whump! :D

[zhouxiangs]

i saw that you're currently reading my stand-in novel but you're not really spoiling anything. how are you finding it so far if i may ask? is it as angsty as people say it is?

(i waited until the end of the day to answer this because as i thought i've already finished the novel, so much for self-restraint lol also sorry this got a bit long... oops?)

i enjoyed it a lot! and it made me get over my reading slump, so i will even excuse it getting into some tropes i'm not particularly fond of at the end. it got cheesy…er, and not even in a way i like. amazingly, that didn't make me like it any less.

from the synopsis of the series and the tags in novel updates (and i only skimmed those because i didn't want to get spoiled) i had a pretty good idea of what the novel was going to be like, which is why i decided not to really liveblog since, transmigration aside, i'd say it's a pretty straightforward story. i could be persuaded to make a recap if there's interest though, since there's still over three weeks left until the series starts airing and i'm probably going to go over everything again and take notes anyway...

and oh, is it angsty! the whole thing hinges on zhou xiang (joe) being a sweet angel baby and yan mingxiu (ming) being a fucking idiot, and it's pretty much what you can expect from any dogblood/makjang with the scum ml, misunderstandings, heartbreak, regrets, etc. i have to say i'm not usually a fan of the misunderstanding trope bc i tend to find it annoying, but as with most tropes i don't particularly enjoy it's because of the way i often see it done. here it was painful for everyone involved, so i really liked it. also, please keep in mind that i'm a huge fan of big character development and characters redeeming themselves, so. there's that. wink wonk. (i've been reading some reviews and think for some people it may be best to know what kind of story this is before going in, other than because of triggers–which, very important if you need them, at least in the novel–because of the whole. scum ml more than anything lol even though yan mingxiu is not that scummy really!)

i love my stories character-driven, so having them being this well fleshed out and compelling was a joy, and being able to see so clearly what both zhou xiang and yan mingxiu were thinking and feeling, sometimes a lot earlier than they themselves could (please bl gods keep at least some of the internal monologue in the series, i am begging), was soooooo ugh. you're supposed to hate yan mingxiu allegedly but i just couldn't, not even in his scum era, because he was so obvious and so oblivious and so set in his own ideas he kept gaslighting himself into not noticing things. this could have gotten frustrating pretty easily, but again, everything feed into the delicious, delicious suffering. that being said, and because it doesn't seem to be a popular opinion... i think it's important to empathise with both of them, or at least sympathise, for maximum enjoyment of all that angst. you cannot cry over yan mingxiu's pain if you want him to get hit by a bus.

oh and the relationships (not only the cp's, though their progression is really good) are very important in this story, which is something i hope we get to see more of in the series because i ended up missing certain side characters in the later chapters. not tan yin though, i hope that fuck ass didn't make it into the series. how is a character so annoying while being in maybe six scenes total.

i can't say if it's good or not but it was extremely enjoyable, zhou xiang is my sweet darling angel baby, yan mingxiu is okay too (if you see me in the trenches defending him in about a month…), and i can't believe i am now, somehow, even more excited for my stand-in.

[unhappy-day-in-hell]

The Dissection of Hazbin Hotel, Episode One: part 2

We got through the opening monologue and here we are in the show proper. Now, we finally get into the episode itself and explore the boring middle. Everyone ready?

CW: This part will briefly touch on Angel Dust's SA.

Part 1:

Part 2: //

Part 3:

Part 4:

--Aaaa ew there it is. This is the first bit of real animation we get from the show, when Charlie lifts up the key.

Somehow, just this one little motion looks awful. As the key moves with Charlie’s hand, it doesn’t look like it’s physically in the world with her.

The animation department was fucked over so badly. It really, really shows.

--Lilith has been missing for 7 years.

Because of course she has. We can’t make the twists with her character TOO subtle!

This is really just trying to make us feel bad for Charlie, but Charlie and Vaggie’s voices sound so lifeless and disinterested that it elicits no emotion from me. (If I was a new watcher, it probably wouldn’t elicit any emotion from me if anyway, since we’ve JUST met Charlie and we haven’t gotten to know her yet; we have no attachment to her and thus can’t immediately care about her Sad Backstory. Missing Mom is a stock sad backstory anyway. We also don’t care about Lilith enough yet, because she was only a vague figure in a fairytale, we don’t actually KNOW her; in fact they even neglected to tell us what her dream was, or what she actually did in Hell, so we don't even have a vague idea to see her as a GOOD figure. And, if her empowering demons IS the reason for demonkind being so terrible, she may be a terrible person. So her missing status means nothing to us.)

--Soooooo……. The extermination just happened, but we’re not going to see any of its aftermath up close? We’re not going to look at the streets of Hell to see the carnage, or the damage? We’re just getting some overhead shots of the city smoking? Okay.

In the pilot, we had a long sequence where we saw the carnage and destruction the exterminators left behind. It was so much more impactful.

But we’re not doing that here. We’re staying up in this cozy penthouse just looking down at a still image of the city. Which means we’re not going to learn about the world at all. No establishing shots, no interesting or visceral imagery to get under our skin and make us FEEL for the sinners. This is very bad storytelling.

Also: If I didn’t know what the exterminations were like from the pilot, I might not even realize the smoke and fire coming off of the city was meant to be DAMAGE – I might just assume Hell was Just Like That.

Terrible job everyone. Terrible opening sequence.

--Vaggie: I enjoy your theatrics.

But Charlie didn’t do anything…

She didn’t even get to light the fireworks like she did in the pilot, which were the signal that the extermination was over and the sinners could come out.

--We go from the opening lore dump… to even more lore dumping!! Yay!!

This is so boring. It’s boring composition and boring animation and boring dialogue with actors who sound sleepy.

Vaggie and Charlie are sitting in a room talking. They’re not even doing anything interesting to look at. This is telling and not showing.

They mention their love for the kingdom, but again, we don’t have any scenes showing the streets, the deceased, and the normal citizens, which might make the AUDIENCE care about it. As of now, the audience doesn’t care because we aren't seeing anything. Throughout the opening fairytale and up to now, we haven’t learned a single thing about how this version of Hell functions. (And we don’t learn that through the entire episode.)

--This dialogue is also so stilted. “I just hope what I’m trying to do here will work.”

Can you have any personality in your lines at all? In the pilot, Charlie says “I don’t know if I’m going to make a difference, I don’t know what I’m doing”, which is just a bit more personal for her; she wants to MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

In the pilot, Charlie’s voice was so much more energetic, and sounded optimistic. Here, yeah she’s SAD and obviously being sad will make her sound softer, but pilot Charlie had a bright, optimistic tone that showed her optimism was unshakable.

--Alastor’s commercial. He really shouldn’t be making this. He’s the radio demon. The conflict is that he doesn’t want to make a TV ad, but was forced into it. This is a dumb conflict. Alastor would never do something he didn’t want to.

Afterwards, the B Plot of the episode will have Vaggie filming a commercial (a second commercial to be better than Alastor’s), and eventually she’ll coerce Alastor into helping her film it. So THAT MEANS Alastor’s first commercial was entirely pointless! Why not streamline this entire B plot? Skip Alastor’s first commercial; the gang gather together and discuss ideas for a commercial; Al is against it, Charlie has too many grand ideas, Vaggie is down to Earth, and Angel offers himself as an actor; then Charlie gets called away, so she gives the responsibility to Vaggie; Vaggie struggles but then Al steps in to help because he knows an empty Hotel will be boring; he then uses his radio powers to create broadcast an advertisement through the airwaves.

Alastor’s voice is also so tame now too. I dislike it heavily. Every line lacks the insane edge it had in the pilot and the radio filter is toned down.

They massacred my fave.

Raggle Fraggle.

--Alastor should never say “daddy issues.” That’s just way too modern. ALSO NOT REALLY? It’s not daddy issues?? If anything, Charlie has talked much more about Lilith in this version, saying it’s her mom’s dream. Daddy Lucy has nothing to do with this. Get your words right, you stupid script.

--The animation is just really bad, especially the part with the rafter falling down from the ceiling.

Also wasn’t it Alastor’s job to use his magic to clean this place up? He did a horrible job.

--Uh huh. We’re continuing the trend of nothing being explained. How the Hotel came to be, and how the crew was amassed, is not going to be explained at all.

We’re dropped in here blind with it already having happened.

It’s true you can’t just recreate the pilot for episode 1, but this is the worst way they could have possibly reintroduced the world.

If you didn’t watch the pilot, then you’d have NO idea what was going on in this place.

--Alastor: So, what do you think?

When I first heard this line it made me sad.

When I hear this line now, it makes me sad.

--Vaggie: I’m sorry, what the fuck was that?

There it is, the unfunny Fuck word being used like a joke.

Pro-tip: just saying the word Fuck does not make a joke. We as humans grow out of this when we stop being high schoolers.

--Why does Alastor look mad when Charlie says the tone of the advertisement is “a bit off?” Nothing should be able to shake him. If anything, he should revel in their discomfort (he reveled in their discomfort in the pilot.) In the pilot, he probably would have made the advertisement like this INTENTIONALLY just to get a reaction out of them and to see them squirm. Here he acts like he wanted them to like it and is upset they don’t.

It makes him look pouty. And making him pouty makes him look weaker.

The heck’s up with this shot? What a weird angle.  

--Alastor hasn’t been active in Hell for some time, huh? It’s because he was hired by Rosie, who is Lilith, who went missing 7 years ago. Viv can’t keep a plot twist secret.

Also, the animation for Alastor when he says he hasn’t been active in some time is weird. It… I wanna say feels kind of noodley? It has a different quality from the rest of the animation.

--Alastor: So I had a little fun with it.

That was a good shot of him passing his microphone from one hand to the next. It’s a second long but I’ll give them that. Maybe Al will get the few scraps of anything decent that come out of this. (Probably not. The leaks say otherwise.)

--Vaggie: well this is NOT what we want to represent us. …. Instead you’re MOCKING us.

These words are oddly stilted again. It’s like when characters speak like they know too much therapy language, when they really shouldn’t.

--Oh Angel. There he is.

….After Viv blew the budget on hiring expensive voice actors, I think all the remaining shoestring budget went into animating him, because he’s way more fluid than the others.

………….Because of course more attention is given to Angel (male) than to Charlie, the actual main (female) character.

--Angel wants to have a porno where he’s sleeping with Alastor. Alastor replies: “Haha. Never going to happen.”

This line lacks any of the manic energy that Alastor had in the pilot – there, when Angel said “I can suck your dick!” Alastor had a short moment where he was shocked, but then he replied with an energetic “HAH! No!” where he still sounded like he was having fun. In Episode One, Alastor sounds tired and annoyed, which takes away his feeling of power. He’s supposed to be this big Overlord; if he had actually laughed heartily and said “~HA HA HA HA! NEVER going to happen, my dear fellow!!~” with oomph, it’d be more in line with how in control he is of everything – but he’s not. He’s whiny. He’s weaker.

This moment shows that OTHER CHARACTERS have the ability to get under his skin when nothing should be able to get under his skin. He's the one who makes everyone else's skin crawl and loves it.

--“This body was MADE to be exploited!”

Alright, show, I’m going to stop you right there.

There's too much to unpack here. People better qualified than me already have.

So let’s begin by saying: Angel being sexual is not the problem. Using sexuality as a coping mechanism is not the problem. However, this crosses the line right from the start.

Angel is the victim of SA, which this has given him trauma. Remember Addict, one of the highest points in Vivzie’s career? Addict showed how BAD he feels by his exploitation; it actually took his situation seriously. At the end of Addict, Angel had frank lyrics where he finally admitted to himself that he was addicted and helpless, and was reluctant but willing to try for something better by staying in the Hotel. Everything Hazbin-related leading up to the show was Angel wanting to ESCAPE his sex-trafficked life.

So for Angel to joke about his body being made to be exploited… Just… How could you possibly think it’s okay? There is no tact here. There is no plausible deniability because of Angel’s history with SA; he’s saying his body is made to be SA’d.

If Angel had replied something like:

Charlie: I don’t want to exploit you in that way!

Angel: Aww, dame! I wanna help ya out, and this is just what I’m good at!

It wouldn’t be so heinous.

Or Angel could be shown to be a little socially intelligent about how Hell works:

Charlie: I don’t want to exploit you in that way!

Angel: But dame! Dame, ya gotta listen. This might be a squeaky clean joint for prudes, but Hell’s full of sexy, sex-loving freaks! And I’M the most famous sex-loving star is all of Hell! If you put me on your advertisements, you’ve got a GUARANTEED audience, and boy is it a massive audience! Your Hotel’ll make it to ALL those sinful, lusty sexlords who get off to me! I mean, you’re the one tryinna redeem ‘em, don’t you think some of THEM might be interested?

(I do kind of like that now that I’ve written that down; at least in that version, Angel actually has something going on in his brain. And Charlie can either concede and be like “yyyyyeah… I guess… you’re right…” or she can go “no Angel you left that life and I won’t be an accomplish making you go through that anymore.” Or something. SHOW SOME FUCKING CHARACTER.)  

There isn’t even anything to joke about with the line as it is. It’s just… thoughtless.

(And... from episode 4... God. It's sickening. This is just a taste of how BAD it is going to get.)

--Angel’s joke about his body parts goes on way too long. The joke overstays its welcome.

--Why is Angel drawn with pink lines on half of his body while all the other characters have full black lines???

--“Oh Trust Me, I can!” Man… it was a glimmer like this shot that makes me miss what Alastor used to be. It’s actually kind of fluid, and it’s like seeing a tiny bit of what the character could have been. But it still, again, completely lacks the raw DANGER and unhinged-ness the originala brought to the show.

--Oh Husk. Oh, Husk, no. Your voice. Oh Husk. They fucked you up. Where’s the exhaustion, where’s the jadedness? You don’t sound burnt-out and hollow (like a HUSK) like you’re supposed to. Good lord.

Also… “Why do you think I’m here? You think I’d be cleaning bottles and listening to you fucks whining if he wasn’t forcing me?” So much telling and not a single ounce of showing.

--Nifty: I like being forced.

………… A little too close to Angel Dust's thing to be saying that, Nifty.

--THIS IS TOO MANY CHARACTERS ALL AT ONCE. This is a huge overload of information. How is a newcomer to the series supposed to register and remember all these guys? (We haven’t even gotten to Adam and Lute yet, meaning even more are on the way.)

Husk and Nifty don’t even do anything in the episode. They don’t need to be here.

--Apparently, Angel has a habit of harassing Husk. I’m worried. Listen: sexually harassing anyone is not okay and it’s not funny. In the pilot, Husk showed disinterest in Angel’s flirting, but nothing super outright or angry – here, he sounds angry. He sounds serious. He doesn’t want to be flirted with. But Angel doesn’t stop. This is not okay.

Why doesn’t Angel understand consent if his entire character arc is about SA and escaping exploitation. Of ANY character, he should have some modicum of self-awareness about this. At the least, they needed to dial back his lines. He’s already gone too far, as we’ve mentioned.

(...From the rest of the episodes, and the leaks, god it gets so much worse.)

--Vaggie: We can’t force sinners to stay here. They have to choose to.

Wow, can you sound ANY deader, Vaggie. This line is miserable.

--Angel thinks the hotel’s idea is stupid. So… why is Angel having this conversation with VAGGIE? This is Charlie’s show! This is Charlie’s dream! This is Charlie’s endeavor, the thing SHE believes in! Charlie is the main character; she is the one who is fighting for redemption!

Why isn’t it Angel and Charlie having this conversation, so Charlie has to defend her stance and Angel can challenge her, and it’ll be our first sign of Charlie facing opposition?

As it is, Vaggie doesn’t even sound convicted in their idea. Her voice is just fucking dead. And Angel cares nothing for the Hotel as stated, so he doesn’t bring any life into this discussion. Charlie is NEEDED in these scenes to bring energy to it.

It's because Charlie isn’t the main character. Viv doesn’t like female characters. She’s the main character in-name only. The male ones like Angel, Alastor, etc, are the ones that are the focus. This becomes more apparent with further episodes too.

--Angel: Crack is expensive.

Angel just coming out and saying that to Vaggie, when like, being off drugs was one of the conditions to staying in the hotel. He says he wants keep staying at the hotel rent-free, he should be hiding that he’s doing it so they don’t cut him from the program and tell him to get lost.

----------

So that was our first look at the show proper. I think that’s a good place to pause, because now, we’re coming into the worst part of the episode, where this train wreck just fucking falls over the edge of a cliff. It will have my most intense thoughts, and explain how Hazbin destroys itself before it can even begin!

Stay tuned!

[wine4thewin]

Any tips for writing smut/romance? Because yours is delicious!

Thank you ☺️

Well, I’d say it’s a long process of trial and error within finding your voice in writing. I’ve been at it for probably 20-ish years and when I first wrote smut maybe a decade ago…it was soooooo bad 🤣 even to this day I will post something with a scene and feel extremely insecure! I’m like, oh God, was it bad!? 😅

Take all of this with a grain of salt. What I feel strongly about, other people may not feel the same. The writing process is different for everyone.

It also depends on your goal. Just regular p*rny smut or thought-out erotica?

1. Emotional Payoff: I find myself writing giant slow burns more than anything these days. Why? Because I want the cumulation of events to feel impactful to the reader. I don’t even mean “oh, the characters have fallen in love” emotional payoff. Sometimes, they aren’t in love. Sometimes, they are struggling with feelings, with beliefs, with conflicts…and I want the first erotic scene to be impactful to the plot, not just ‘thrown in for the hell of it’. It must add to the story and I want it to be a turning point or realization of sorts for the characters…for better or worse. Can this be done without a slow burn? Yes. But it takes a very precise prose to do it in a short piece.

Essentially, beyond my long-windedness, I am saying the smut should mean something to the story to be emotionally impactful to the reader, even if the act is meaningless to the characters themselves at that time. That is the difference IMO between erotica and flat, emotionless p#rny writing.

More below the cut - 18+ for some scenarios mentioned, but nothing crazy or offensive.

2. Sometimes Less Crude is More Sexy: This depends on your goal. Are you aiming for just how many dirty words you can cram in a paragraph? Seems a bit wild, but sometimes certain words can make a smut scene more impactful. I used to write every single gory detail with blunt, crude words. Did it work? Sure. Was it the sort of writing that made people feel a flutter or emotional response aside from ‘ooo dirty smut’? Maybe not.

Back to emotion. Emotional words can take your smut to the next level. You could say your male character ‘grabbed her thighs and spread them quickly, his huge *insert crude word* hard and ready to stuff her dripping *insert crude word*’.

Or, you could say instead, ‘the calloused tips of his fingers ghosted across her skin, making her shiver with anticipation. The tremble in his touch betrayed his inexperience, even as he moved slowly between her thighs. She could feel that he was eager for her, pressed as he was against her own desire…and she would take all he had to offer and more.

There would be no going back from this.

“Am I what you want?” His voice was an utterance across her lips, gaze dark and questioning. Pupils wide, consuming her.

There was no need to answer aloud. She shifted her hips and took him for herself.’

The above is me setting the stage for the act itself, all while putting in words and sentences that reveal small emotions, details, insecurities, dominance, and desires. Idk, you tell me, I just made that whole scene up on the spot 😂

When you read something that makes you react, remind yourself of the words the writer used that made you feel. Was it because they pulled you into the scene, had you feel with the character you love? Or was it because they said dripping vajayjay twenty times? Different strokes for different folks!

3. Don’t Be Repetitive: Refer to genitalia in different ways, but don’t be obnoxiously flowery like the harlequin novels of old and their “his staff of love quivered in her touch” sorta thing. More like, “his desire was velvet covered steel under her grasp / his firm length” or “she was swollen against his fingertips, ready, glistening with arousal”. You can get away with saying d#ck a few times, but it gets annoying and eye-rolling if it’s every sentence. You can check out this list for ideas!

4. Use Location/Situation to Your Advantage: where are these characters? Semi-public? In private? Are they forbidden being together? Or is their love considered illegal or shameful in your fantasy/sci-fi country? Bring feelings of ‘could we be caught, excitement, the thrill, shame, struggling with own beliefs, reluctance yes, even reluctance’ into the smut to amp up the stakes.

5. Not All Sex is Perfect: hey, we don’t always get it right the first time. I’ve written one character having the time of his life from his POV, only to find out his partner didn’t exactly find him as awe-inspiring 🤣 but, his partner gave him another chance, what a saint jk jk, and the emotional aspect of this previously very selfish character realizing he feels strongly about pleasing someone other than himself for the first time ever was a huge plot point with the smut.

Don’t be afraid of awkward sex, reassuring sex, figuring things out together sex…they can always get it right the next time!

6. If You Write a Kink, Go Deep: size kink, BDSM, A/B/O, etc. if you are going to do it, really commit to it. Don’t mention it vaguely, because if people are looking for that in your smut because you tagged it as such, don’t leave them hanging! I had to study BDSM terms, read blogs of those in the life and their experiences to even come close to writing authentically about it (and I mean stuff beyond generic spanking, such as the risks of edgeplay, knife play, wax play, sensory deprivation, subspace, etc).

Closing thoughts before I ramble you into the abyss from whence you won’t return:

Overall, writing is to have fun! Don’t be hard on yourself, it’s always a learning process. Ask for feedback on your smut, observe what you like about your favorite authors, practice practice practice.

Much of my advice may be considered advanced (or maybe it’s all shit LOL) but I hope some of it helps bring food for thought and helps others on their ever-continuing journey of creative writing!

[puzzlevision]

update

hello, yoko here.

so some of you may noticed that i changed my username, you can still call me as yoko but once the revamping is started, you will no longer call me by that name. i want to seperate myself from that name that made me known on the smg4 fandom.

this is a very long explanation so its under the cut, and note to people on tumblr around: it contains controversal stuffs happening on glitch productions

this change is because of the smg4 controversy that happened recently, with the main one being taris old va (celeste notley-smith) being replaced by a new one. which is okay at first because celeste is a mother and a teacher and needs to focus on other stuffs and yadda yadda, until you found out that she fired from glitch after 6 years.

6.

FUCKING

YEARS.

now picture this: you are one of the first voice actor/actress from a recently new company, only to get replaced by a new one after years of voicing a character that you dearly love. the new tari va (lottie baurne) almost sounds like her old va and thats okay, but this situation is awful. not only that, robyn (smg2s former voice actress) is stepping down from glitch because of that. she recently made a video about this controversy on her channel "anime america", so please make sure to watch it.

yeah yeah i know jasmine yang (the voice director) made an apology, but that… is just not that good. sometimes we always forget things, but her apology? this is meh. im hoping to see celestes respond about her apology so the situation will be calm once again (like it was used to be… back in the early years). im also looking forward for the lerdwichagul brothers' responds as well.

and about the other controversy, we got glassdoor ratings about employee mismanagement coming from ex-workers, thanks to the ceo… aka kevin. i dont understand why kevin was hated by everyone back then, but it turns out that they are right. kevin is a completely different person with cameras OFF. that one scene from the episode "smg4… are you okay?" where smg4 tortures toads into manipulation by making videos for his channel became more obvious with this one. the good side is we havent heard about luke (smg4) yet.

on the other hand, i will probably start a career as a utau producer once i have speakers for my pc, dowloaded utau, and practiced how to use that software (hence the "prod" on my url). there is a chance that kikyuune aiko will be my main. smg4 stuffs will still be around, however you will see less smg4 stuffs here due to the controversy and the fact that this is a multifandom account aside from my likes. buuuuut that does not mean ill stop working on pandemic love distortion. (for those who didnt know about this one, its a wip smg34 fanfic made by me that was put on developmental hiatus due to irl stuff)

and for those who havent heard of it already, i will permanently post all my future arts to @blueberry-arts, but previous arts from my main will still be here and remain. so if you want new arts from mine go to my other account pls 🙏

soooooo i guess that will be all. thank you for reading.

signed, yoko. 🫐

[icharchivist]

icha!! I finished awakening moon :) it was very good and i can see why u love chikage! I have two BURNING questions up top though.

1. do we ever learn what the exact job of the organization is. I guessed espionage/assassin/various shady business before even starting this act so personally i’m very very happy i got there at least. hmph. I’m pretty good. but do we ever learn more about… actual job details?

and 2. do we ever get a real explanation for chikage’s “I don’t like women” line. it’s so abrupt that it’s funny but also this is the one information my sister has about chikage and it’s not easy to defend against lmaoooo. I don’t for a second believe chikage’s story abt his mother is the right one because first… if that is real it’s a bullshit excuse. like hello dude. have u ever talked to One More Woman than ur mother. izumi can’t be that special. i feel like that isn’t supposed to be totally untrue since he like… shoves izumi away after making sure she doesn’t get run over that one time? but my working theory is that izumi startled him so badly that one time he was like “i have to make sure she never touches me again” and decided the best way to do that was… whatever he said. and then he keeps being standoffish to izumi when they’re alone bc he’s already gone past the point of no return so may as well just drop the pleasant act. that line is so wild to me though because like really apart from that he is pretty normal around izumi. like. what’s going on here it’s going to haunt me.

ok now onto the chronological stuff… this is a lot more chapters, so I’ll be quicker, and anyways I feel like i set up my initial feelings and thoughts pretty well in the last ask so i don’t need to say too much stuff. anyways i feel like here a whole lotta stuff Happens but it was mostly playing out things i’d expected to happen for the most part? but i might also jump around time a little bit because of that…

anyways when they were practicing that thunder scene I was thinking that he sounded as easygoing as always. so it was nice to hear izumi back me up on that one. you're correct the voice acting here is really wonderful. wataru hatano you're amazing! and well. i mean. listen. shaiapouf as a character Is. a Character but the voice acting for him is pitch-perfect so yeah. skill. i felt like chikage goes through a Lot this arc but seriously, the voice acting for him throughout just like, consistently impressed me.

izumi’s thinking to herself he isn't good at showing emotion bc he just sounds shallow and empty. wow u really did not hold back there. i've been thinking this for a while but i want to throw homare at chikage. it would be fun for soooo many reasons. like chikage has to contend with how homare is around hisoka and everyone but also the whole homare deal of like “i’m incapable of being a normal human!” i imagine that would strike a chord somewhere. even now that he’s like reconciled with hisoka it would be rather interesting.

love the deeply hassled sigh chikage lets out when izumi asks him to stay back for a moment. I still think its crazy that izumi literally hasn’t said a thing abt how weird he’s being including tsuzuru when he was struggling with his script. also when he dropped that small bottle? My guesses were “dangerous poison serum” and “august memento” and im glad to say i was right on BOTH counts. and the way he goes "If you touched that, I would've never forgiven you." when izumi goes to pick up… chikage is so fun/interesting to me because he’s got this very placid mask for his emotions but the moment that drops he’s soooooo obvious. goes like 0-100. like he does not recover well. i would ask how he survived previous espionage missions etc. but i guess previously he did not have to deal with august and april being dead. But anyways the moment i saw that i was like “hm… hisoka didn’t wash up with it so he probably drank it… did it give him amnesia?” soooooo :) smug smile.

i do like izumi being mad at this whole thing. I mean even up to the end of this event she’s still so confused abt chikage’s women hater thing which. fair. but mostly i really like izumi’s relationship with chikage because it feels like it’s the most antagonistic she’s been towards other troupe members? like when chikage invited her out on that date i audibly said to myself “hell yeah, PvP” and well. he kidnapped her and then she antagonized him by acting out the entirety of the wonderful charlatan of oz (which, love that she knows the entire script by heart).

the spring sleepover, part two! i thought it was nice that like. itaru and banri were gaming together here and it was banri who was like “um… where the fuck is ur roommate.” it reminded me of how itaru would knowingly be like ah. I don’t think u can just skate by in akigumi. like itaru… yes chikage looks like he wants to leave but i think u are being a little. unwelcoming. tsk tsk. glad tsuzuru and the rest of harugumi react appropriately. sakuya’s "chikage always looks at me when we're acting together, but it feels like... he's not actually SEEING me, you know?" was sooo insightful. thinking about how yuzo said sakuya has that stupid innocent part of rick down pat. i've got to think. that's probably the only part of him that chikage knows too, huh… but obviously sakuya (and rick) are more than that! the “it feels like he's acting opposite to a doll instead of a person” line really makes me want to sit down with chikage and be like. oh my god. I mean i know the organization u work for is for sure illegal but i also think it’s bad for ur mental health.

the moment they decided to prank him by tampering with his food i Knew that chikage was gonna get mad lol. like as an assassin / whatever multi-talented job he has i doubt he’d take kindly to it. and then he laces izumi’s food later. lol.

hisoka going “I’m scared to fall asleep” made me really worry… but his flashback scene was so fun to watch. I don’t have much to say abt it since we get the full explanation of that last scene with august later, but i am confused about them mastering japanese…? like, my assumption has always been that they were natively japanese since um… i feel like. people would point that out otherwise right. and it wouldn’t make sense for their names to be japanese otherwise either… maybe they are and were just like. out on the streets in a foreign country u probably wouldn’t learn japanese, huh… or is it just like. anime logic.

anyways izumi got kidnapped that was so fun. quoting from my notes when i realized it was gonna happen “oh he's totally kidnapping izumi. this is the best possible outcome actually. i wanted to see them fight.” I was confused as to why chikage was getting seen by Literally Everyone bc it’s like. didnt u research their schedules. but then i realized it was on purpose lol. I really liked that izumi figured out the chika-usa thing, like, immediately! and started gushing about it lol. it was nice to see chikage open up a bit. and then she quoted august which i’m sure was sweet and not at all doing irreparable damage to chikage’s psyche. well rip to her for a while. i do think it is sooo funny how muku is like maybe they ran off and eloped! same vibes as juza seeing sakyo and his mom and thinking theyre together. i’d say its a sakisaka/hyodo thing but no. i think like at least 50% of the troupe is just like that.

chikage never being able to sleep unless he’s like totally alone because he can’t feel safe otherwise is… sad. also its such a fun contrast to hisoka! i have been thinking abt this a lot actually bc like both these characters have their own sleep quirks and also this episode is called awakening moon? which i think is obviously like. that bright moon over august’s death… but it’s also like, an awakening, which i think suggests like, the recovery of hisoka’s memories as well as chikage’s awakening to like… the truth of that night and that hisoka hadn’t betrayed them at all… but i think it’s such a fun word because like some of the most important breakthroughs in this episode don’t center on waking up at all. in fact they hinge upon the opposite: sleep! hisoka sleeping to remember and chikage sleeping around sakuya… speaking of that scene where hisoka sleeps, winter is SO SWEET throughout this entire episode. like genuinely every time they show up they’re so sweet. the way homare says he’ll keep a lookout and pay hisoka back for mmmbm! and the way later when hisokas like i have to do something. on my own. all of winter troupe comes to him and is like hey i noticed ur sleeping less… can we share ur burdens? and the way tasuku catches him when he immediately falls asleep. so good. also azuma SPECIFICALLY being the one to wish him sweet dreams! considering… everything, surrounding azuma’s own troubles with sleep and the whole good night sweet dreams from nocturnality… that got me.

december 2nd being the night before they did their plan makes me think like??? is Hisoka’s bday literally just the day he lost his memories? what a day. like did he pick that as his bday after losing his memories or was that. but goddd. what a day. love chikage and izumi in that hideout room like izumi really went “I’m gonna annoy u through my acting. fuck you.” until hisoka showed up. him doing the whole putting himself in someone else’s shoes with chikage… inspired by homare… that made me clutch my heart. especially with homares line of “you will be fine. I am sure you will know what to do” like the SURETY in that!! now I’m very glad hisoka didn’t end up drinking the amnesia serum bc chikage’s shout of “don’t!” was so distressed like wow. this is the last piece of his family he has left. but OH MY GOD. could u imagine the alternate universe where chikage did not stop him and hisoka drank that potion. and winter loved him again and again and again. like my god the drama there. also chikage seems like he would spiral so incredibly deeply because of it and it would be incredibly angsty but also it would be so interesting. I do no think a3 has the time for that since they have like, plays to do and can’t properly pull that off and make it sincere with the proper amt of time but oh my god could u imagine… on the other hand I think chikage has so much love for his family of august and april that he would never have let hisoka drink it.

I love how when they get back though izumi decides that she can totally just LIE to a troupe of ACTORS when she’s proven she’s not that good at acting… it’s good hisoka backs her up or stuff would’ve gotten crazy… I hope ppl do get to know more of the truth eventually not because I want people to be mad at chikage. mostly because I want to know the full details of his job already and bc I think it’d be nice if he had more than like One Person to share his thoughts with. it’s good he does have the one, though. and I love spring troupe reaffirming that they’re family! that rly carried throughout the whole of awakening moon, it was so good.

chikage trying to leave was one of my favorite bits of awakening moon! like itaru u are SO funny. first its like "hi chikage :) u are the best roommate i couldve asked for" (and i think he calls him sempai?? wild) and then the moment chikage leaves he calls up sakuya. pfft. he knows what he’s doing. and then sakuya!!! I KNEW that coin toss was gonna come back and I KNEW sakuya was gonna get it right The Once!! and see through his lie! and right when chikage was abt to leave!! play parallels secured hehe. also sakuya’s "isn't there anything we can do for you? isn't there anything we can do to help?" the hisoka&winter parallels! I loved how sakuya was just like. u and me. sleep on the stage. like wow… I laughed at tenma for naively going “let’s all sleep together!” as the solution for summer troupe but like clearly this technique is working well for harugumi. chikage going "I... can't be your family. I betrayed you. I don't have the right." though… my god. I have to think this is very telling in terms of how he perceived hisoka, too, in that after his betrayal he was no longer allowed to be part of chikage’s “family”—but he still tells tsuzuru he has 2 siblings, in that conversation he has with him, so I assume he was really struggling with how to feel about hisoka—as far as chikage knew, hisoka had betrayed them, but he was also the Only Family chikage had left… that’s wild. it was cute to see sakuya recount spring’s first three plays but very strange to see sakuya talk abt clockwork heart, unknowing of the entire mizuno situation. I mean, it makes sense he wouldn’t know it well, but it’s still wild to me. I also like how chikage’s sprite isn’t wearing glasses here! also when he said "When I'm playing Oswald, it's like I'm drowning in all his emotions, too. It's suffocating." I was like ah. tsuzuru did his job well, then. for real that play sure did work well on improving chikage huh.

sakuya phrasing his relative situation in terms of like. him as the audience and everyone else on stage is such an apt and compelling comparison! and then chikage and sakuya sleeping together and then the whole of harugumi piling in… that cg was SO CUTE. everyone’s just so adorable there! sakuyas expression! citron sprawled on top of them! everything!

as for the play performance, I’m glad closing night went well! the costumes for this play are sooo good. I’ve been thinking abt itaru and citrons in particular like hello? hello? yuki great job. although I wonder why masumi is wearing just like a regular fucking jacket under his scarf deal. he doesn’t look that magic to me. gosh I imagine the prop work for this play would be insane tho like. how’d they deal with the hot air balloon and stuff. and the magic. I also listened to the corresponding song and liked it a lot! for some reason it reminded me of gusty garden galaxy, like the mario music? oh and hisoka almost calling chikage april and then the teasing lilt in hisokas voice when he says "chikage, they're calling you an ape" that was so cute. but also like cmon guys. chikage's birthday is Right There. that could be such a normal nickname. I also loved homare’s et tu, tasuku?! line. that was so funny

I loved that tenma sincerely did not realize chikage kidnapped izumi. and then he, taichi and sakuya all totally believed chikage’s lie. which I did not fall for even a bit. tsumugi going "I'm glad all the loose ends have been tied" though made me sit there though like okay what the fuck does the Organization do tho. huh. that’s a pretty loose end. also does chikage really hate women. they haven’t touched that as of this line. but then hisoka saying he wants to tell winter his memories even tho it could be selfish! so sweet! and loved how tsumugi and azuma are both traditionally supportive while tasuku and homare are like you're worried about being selfish NOW? i love you that way anyways.

and THEN the last cg with chikage and hisoka reminiscing. that scene was. oh my godddd. the way u can like Hear chikage going from fond reminiscing to having his voice break down into crying… it’s soooo good. and his sad smile!! and the moon!! I’m so glad these two were able to find each other and reconciled really… the only reason I didn’t cry was bc hisoka said that family was "inseperatable and irreplacable" and I had this moment of “oh. citroncore” bc I’m like 99% sure that inseperatable is not a real word and hisoka meant inseparable instead. I’m taking it as a sign that he did not 100% master Japanese even tho it’s definitely just a super minor localization error/typo. and then chikage helping izumi wash dishes in the morning :) like I said before I like that these two r a little hostile to each other like.

chikage: you're shamelessly optimistic

izumi: why thank you.

chikage: that wasn't a compliment

that exchange was so fun. like wow okay. I also liked how izumi was like hm. let’s throw chikage into opening night. I’m sure he’ll feel frustrated by how he doesn’t measure up and just Lets That Happen. I think it’s a sort of fun difference since she’s usually pretty gentle and sweet to people. not that she isn’t to chikage! she definitely is I mean he kidnapped her and she was worried abt his sleep schedule. but I think she like is more challenging towards him and that’s a rly fun dynamic. and then chikage making up a lie to justify his women hating. I’ve already explained my confusion on this so I’m just gonna conclude with ITS KUMON AND HE WANTS TO JOIN AKIGUMI!!!!! WHOOO!!!!!!! I’m SO hype for that like. I feel we’ll get some fun juza (and possibly banri?) bits that way… I actually have heard a bit abt kumon in that I feel like I’ve read smthing abt him having a kind of weak body? so we shall see about that but I’ve got a feeling that may be the reason he’s unable to join akigumi—since that’s an action-based troupe and all… I’m very excited since it seems like he hadn’t even thought abt joining summer troupe initially!! also I am so excited to see summer in full force again. hands clasped in prayer tenma & juza main story interactions? my secondary color trio? I don’t think that’ll actually happen but 1) I can dream and 2) I can write abt it. lol. I would also love to know the flower meanings of what chikage sends to hisoka pre act 2!!!

HELLOOO FRIEND OMG! so quick to finish it!! congratulation!!!

AND DLKJFDL GLAD TO SEE THEN IT ALL MAKES SENSE. Chikage. Good.

For the two questions.

Pretty sure the implication is espionage/spy works with various level of shady involved. In the EN server we get a little more glimpse into what Chikage does in particular, other than that i think in the JPN server there's been various events just talking more in depth about the Organization and their involvement in it.

Okay so I'm on a whole different level on it because i legit heard his story about his mom and went "yeah makes sense". While he's never that mean to anyone ever, he is deeply uncomfortable around women in general in others backstages especially and i remember a backstage late in the JPN development that mentions it's really a gut feeling and he's trying so hard nowadays to improve on that, and improve on knowing "if Izumi doesn't make me feel this unwell around women then maybe i'll be able to solve this gut reaction i have around women". I think the way he violently pushed Izumi away was definitely to keep her away because he had no reason to play nice with her, and usually he behaves just, normally, but he's really uncomfortable around women still. I would be inclined to believe he didn't tell EVERYTHING regarding his family situation but to me i would assume that something bad happened when he was a child enough to make him think as a defense mechanism "women=bad". To me there's abuse involved. The Organization is hinted to be all male and Chikage is hinted to have been recruited very young, so it's possible that the turn of event is, Chikage had a toxic upbringing and, esp with a child mind, blamed his mother for not protecting him, then he moved in an all male organization and meeting women was so anecdotical until late in his life that this defense mechanism truly got worse since then and now he has a hard time getting rid of it. Personally i can't see his argument fully as bullshit because hhhh i had my mom get me from household to household by getting in relationship with abusive men who were abusive toward me and my reaction was more to blame my mother for not listening to me and doing as she pleases than to specifically get mad at those guys, so, the whole reasoning Chikage is saying in this part (if we take it as a truth) to me makes sense. It's not fair nor reasonable but trauma, especially experienced as a child, rarely is.

On a more practical level, i think it's just meant to be a romance trope lol. While a3 is more found family focused a lot of backstages, esp SSR ones, and every 3rd mini chat, involves the characters flirting with Izumi (as a self insert more than a character), not to mention it happens as well on homepage's lines for like, vday or bday and stuff. And Chikage is definitely built around the trope of "he can't stand women (for traumatic reasons) but he makes an exception for you/you make him feel safer/he's willing to grow past his trauma as you make it easier for him.". It's pretty cheesy and i do dislike that it's the trope he was plagued with but that's kind of the reasoning. So yes Izumi "can be that special", that's the trope ahah.

but yeah no personally i'm team he must have had a deep trauma and at best he says the truth and it's only because he felt abandonned when he needed help by a parent, and at worse, something much worse happened for him to be this uncomfortable with being touched by women (because he generally handles conversation with women just fine, like, he treats women pretty normally, and it's when they get touchy or invade his personal space that he gets visibly uncomfortable. and even there he never gets physical in reclaiming his bondaries, he generally lies his way out in a pleasant way, it's really only with Izumi in the intro chap that he is this violent. When he really told off Izumi it was to make sure she kept her distances and else it's really only when they got physical that his reactions were a little more pushed, in general he handles being around her like a normal person. He was mostly violent because he didn't want to play nice with Hisoka's found family, in any other circumstances he takes upon himself.). And that's kind of a horrifying thought DLKFJDF the cause of the behavior was never extended on though.

On another note he does work on it a lot and came to acknowledge that he can't just let his trauma response get in the way of his life and interractions with 50% of the society, and he's been working on getting less uncomfortable around women. but yeah it's not "hate women" in a misogynist way sorta, it's really just, yeah.

anyway back to the chapter,

DLKFJDLFK RIGHT Wacchan is incredible, truly has a Voice Range. He really has such a nice voiiice and it helps building Chikage as a character so much i love it so much.

Izumi literally doesn't hold back against prick i love that for her <3 I find his acting really interesting as to inform us on his character, and you're right, i feel like Homare would be a good person to lock him with. (Hisoka's next evil plan i'm sure. Now that they're reconsiliated he can be evil on purpose like a little brother <3). I feel like the difference is that Homare is just like that while Chikage is probably just… something he forced himself to be so much it became as natural as breathing, as a spy and everything, and that's why once Mankai pried him open like an oysters he had a really hard time sorting it all out. Like what do you MEAN his mask doesn't protect him anymore. And i think having Homare being all nodding about the lack of human emotions esp now that the dam has been broken would just have Chikage stares into oblivion like, this is my life now.

GOD YEAH about his mask. IT's so fucking cool. It's really just, as long as he can act detached and pleasant he handles everything just fine but the moment things go awry he's struggling a lot more with his emotions and i just muah But yeah you're right, for the intense reaction to the potion i do think it's a mix of still grieving August so much that anyone touching a memento of him would be like fingers in his gapping wounds, and the fact Izumi is the person that "took Hisoka way from him" with the whole theater, or, at least, so heavily linked to how Hisoka "moved on", he especially becomes more irrational with that. Since at this point he still blames Hisoka for August's death, it's having an extention of Hisoka taking the last bit of August he still has away from him. And thus, irrational behavior. Basically yeah i think he handled spying much better in term of lying and all ahah but at the moment he's still grieving and handling it in the poorest, least healthy way, that anything that ends up touching the grief itself makes him act irrational.

you really got it all figured as you read ahah i'm amazed!!!! congratz!

I do love Izumi's behavior on it. While a lot of the others actors have been prick in their own way, they at least contained it at throwing it at each other and never at Izumi. She never really had to deal with any of them being antagonistic toward her and it was interesting to see her dynamic with Chikage when Chikage basically decided to be A Menace. And I love that she's allowed to be angry and frustrated about being treated like that and how much she had to handle when Chikage became even More Of A Menace.

Spring sleepover. Always good. I do love that Banri was able to see it too and like, Banri&Itaru, the duo of "tried to leave the Mankai company" being both "huh. your roommate isn't really trying to stay in the company. That's bad.". Meanwhile yeah, remember how in the Autumn Chapter when Banri is about to leave Sakyo tells him "you can leave but don't think you'll be allowed to come back" and Banri leaves anyway and he has to beg Sakyo to come back? Like i feel like Banri was really MHMMMMMMMMMMMMM WE DONT DO THAT HERE. I ADORE Sakura's comment though, yes. It was so insightful and Sakuya is so perceptive i love him so much. Sweet son. Yuzo's comment is so funny god. yeaaaahh agreed on the comment for Chikage, the org cannot be healthy. Like, man. This is not a healthy way to live his life.

I didn't even notice the parallelism between Spring putting thing in his food VS him putting stuff in Izumi's food LMAOOOOO, payback in the worst way possible (assassin style). I loved to see Spring do something that stupid. They want to bond with him so bad!!! but he's still A Menace so this was the worst plan they had in a long while.

Oh Hisoka not being native Japanese was pointed out actually? in the Winter chapter during the spy arc, Homare mentions that Hisoka indeed sounds shady as a "foreigner no one knows the origin of". in the anime i know they took it one step further with the spy confronting Hisoka and saying "it's true you entered this country illegally and are laying low in this theater company to escape crimes?". Hisoka and Chikage are definitely implied to not be Japanese. They can still be East Asian so people wouldn't pick it up as easily, but they're not Japanese. (there was a lot of talk back in the days about the possibility of Hisoka being Russian, both because of the descriptions of intense Winter from his youth and because he is compared to a Russian Short Hair Cat in the Christmas play. Do of that as you will.) And "Hisoka" and "Chikage" are not their birthname either, they're codenames August gave them for the mission. The only reason Hisoka remembers it as his name is that since it was a name given by August, it was the only time he was given a name out of love, and as such, he held on to this name. But it's also why Hisoka and Chikage's name have the meaning they have. Hisoka's is "Secretly" and Mikage involves "shadow" in its imagery, similarly for "Chikage", and "Utsuki", Chikage's last name, is a way to say "April". August didn't really think too far about all of this lmao. That's one of the reasons i mentioned the organization to be International in a previous ask tbh. And yeah they both learnt Japanese for the job, but it's implied they both speak a lot of others languages. Chikage says it a little more obviously (and he talks about "flying aboard for work" a lot) and for Hisoka we know he's very good at English as well. Hisoka fearing falling asleep though is so :(((.

"THIS IS THE BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME ACTUALLY" LMAOOOOOOOO You're right. yes. But yes Chikage is just shady on purpose, he's so stupid i love that about a man. But yess i love how Izumi figured out the Chika-usa thing right away. It was really her moment of "Chikage redemption arc". And then he kidnapped her and it was just, ah. but yes it was so nice to see Chikage open up and Chikage getting some emotional and psychological warfare from Izumi reminding him of August.

yeah no it's a 50% of the troupe is like that. TO BE FAIR TO THEM THOUGH. THIS IS NICHE KNOWLEDGE BUT I NEED TO SHARE. But in Azuma's birthday SSR that came out like, a month before Chikage's intro chapter, Azuma…… kidnaps Izumi to a resort island with him and then specifically sends texts to the Mankai company to say "heheh we're on a date" and then leave them on read and take Izumi's phone when Masumi and Sakyo start to send death threat. Of course it's, not the same kind of kidnapping, Izumi was mostly conscenting to joining Azuma but didn't expect the trip and didn't expect they'd stay up the night, but MY POINT IS that IN RECENT MEMORY they had Azuma and Izumi "eloping" and leaving everyone on read because Azuma is a MENACE. So IN THEIR DEFENSE i think they have reasons to jump to the wildest conclusions since they can at least go "well. It did happen once." and then look at Azuma with a look of reproach while he's just 😇

yeah Chikage not being able to sleep is sad :( it is indeed a fantastic contrast with Hisoka yeah. For the record the official nickname for April/December/August is "Gekkagumi" because "Gekka" means both "month" and "moon" ("gumi" is troupe). In Chikage's song he talks about being alone under the shadow of the moon and the word he uses for that is especially "Gekka". (he also talks about "tears falling in secret" and the term for "in secret" there is "Hisoka", which also would express how his emotions and vulnerability is something he can only afford with Hisoka,at this point at least.) I think this is also the tongue-and-cheek reason why the Moon is such an important illustration for those two, since it's a wordplay on the fact months and moon is the same thing. Which therefore adds further to how their own sleeping cycle add to it yes. I really love how much Hisoka and Chikage are built as foil to one another. Even on their designs! Like, Chikage has green hair and clear eyes, Hisoka has white hair and green eyes. Their hair part in the opposite direction to one another, like it's mirrored. And i don't remember where it's mentioned but the state of Hisoka's hidden eye is a secret and it's not impossible that it's because he's blind from this eye, VS Chikage wearing fake glasses (he doesn't need them) giving an illusion of perfect vision. With the irony, of course, that it was Chikage who was blind to the truth. and ofc Sugar VS Spice and their general personality and, of course, their sleep patern.

But yes in Sleeping we trust. I think it's such a sweet way to show that Hisoka's "quirk" which Chikage mostly frowned upon, ended up being both of their salvation and the indication that they can both lay down and rest. Chikage being kept awake is a shown of his lack of trust and amount of things to work on which shows the toxic hold the Organization has on him, and as such, Sleeping is instead associated with the safety of being able to rest around people who are here for you. It's really such a nice thematic they work on here.

WINTER IS SO SO SWEET I COULDNT STOP CRYING. Literally the whole scene about how "just how heavy is that sin you bear?" "perhaps it's heavy enough for the five of us to carry together" IN TEAAAARS IN TEARS IN TEARS LOVE IS REAL LOVE IS IN FUYU im fine im fine BUT YOU GET ME. They're all here for him in their own way and it really showcase their arc so far too. From Homare learning to read his emotions, Tsumugi ready to be here to carry his troupe with confidence, Tasuku being there physically to do that, and Azuma helping him find solace in his sleep… It's just. God Winter is so well written. The payup to their arc was so good.

Hisoka losing his memories on his bday is so sad goodness. BUT GODD YEAH. YEAH THIS WHOLE BIT. YEAH. Between Hisoka going to confront Chikage and just, knowing Homare had supported him this whole time, and this surety like you said!! god i love Fuyu i love Fuyu i love- I love Chikage's reaction to it all god. Like, i think he convinced himself he wanted to destroy December because it was the normal thing to want right? He thought Hisoka killed August, and faked his death, he blamed Hisoka for the distress he was in, and so, he put all of his distress and turned it into rage and revenge to carry on. But he never actually wanted harm on Hisoka and it's only when harm almost happened that he realized that. So blinded by revenge he was about to destroy the one thing he should have been happy to still have. His pure despair when everything sinks in and especially that Hisoka did nothing wrong is just. Everything to me. Like seriously i wasn't too hot on Chikage at first because i was so pissed at how he was treating Hisoka, but the moment the line "what do i do now…. in the end the one who was betrayed by his own family… was you by my own hand" was uttered i did a 180° and was just oh okay i would die for Chikage actually. Thanks for your time. Just the absolute devastation of realizing he was becoming the monster he had seeked to destroy, and turned the destruction he felt was righteous as a way to cope against the only person he never actually wanted to harm? God this is good angst. This is SUCh an interesting character bit. (his chara song also kinda confirms it, "rather than fooling others, i'm better at fooling myself" i'm putting my fist in my mouth)

BUT YEAH GOD the alternative universe where Chikage was just a little too late and Hisoka had drank the potion is just. GOD. Winter would love him all over again, they'd be here every step of the way, and Chikage would probably be spiral so damn much because of the guilt. I see why a3 didn't do it, like you say, but holy shit what an amazing angst fuel this idea is. but yes, agreed, Chikage loves his family too much to let it happen. Everything he wanted about Hisoka's destruction was just his grief lashing out and was never something he actually meant.

i think it's actually a good time to mention the flowers Chikage sent? the first bouquet he sent were Marigolds. They represent "Jealousy, despair, grief" in the Japanese flower language. (in other flower languages it can also means happiness, joy and good luck, but it depends how much Chikage knew that) There's a clear mix there, but to me it seems Chikage was basically sending his anguish to Hisoka. His Jealousy that Hisoka could move on (or how close Hisoka and August used to be), the despair he's been into ever since they both left, this grief. But also perhaps a part of him was wishing him happiness, joy and good luck. The second bouquet was of Zinnias. Zinnias, in the Japanese Flower Language, means "thoughts of absent friends, I mourn your absence". This one is far more explicit. Could it be about August? Of course, but i don't think so. I think it was a way for Chikage to call for help. He was genuinely mourning BOTH of them. He also lost Hisoka himself, in his mind. He saw Hisoka bloom on stage and befriend more people, and he lost him, he was no longer part of his life. No matter how they were before, Chikage loves Hisoka dearly and he still lost him.

(and i mean it for the call for help, do listen to his song: he keeps calling for help in it. Song is set before the conclusion of Awakening Moon so it's still his revenge self singing.)

So yeah it's just. a lot. I love them a lot.

LKDFJLKDF Izumi lying to everyone sure was funny. She tried. Thank you Hisoka for the back up. But yes i'd love more people to get to know about Chikage's background at least. And yes!! Spring is a family! and that includes Chikage, who lost his family, who was about to destroy the family he had left, being forcefully adopted into his own new family. fun fact! the flower associated with Chikage is the lilly of the valley, which means "return to happiness". It fits doesn't it? He lost his family but now he can have a new one. He can return to being happy….

yeah Itaru calls him Senpai, he's very cheeky about it. Itaru facing him was indeed so funny and i do love the whole thing keeping in mind Itaru almost left the company, it really was "okay time to unleash our secret "stay in Mankai" weapon. Sakuyaaaaa we need yoouuuuuu". AND THEN SAKUYA!!!! YEAH WHEN YOU FIGURED OUT FOR THE COIN TOSS I WAS EHEHEHEHEH!!! Sleeping together sure works super well for Harugumi. It's really so funny. And god yeah it sure tells a lot about how he saw Hisoka doesn't it…. man those guys. I think it's also that, just… Hisoka has been his sibling for a huge chunk of their lives when Hisoka betrayed him. Like i mentioned i think a part of him knew all along and he was fooling himself, that he still cared too much for Hisoka to turn this betrayal around. It was still his brother, no matter the amount of pain they went through. But Spring is a new family, Spring is barely getting to know him, and it's not fair that he would join this family while he only ever joined to hurt them and betray them. And also, to be fair, at this point Chikage flipped the script around as well in term of who betrayed who. He sees himself as the one who betrayed Hisoka for being unable to listen to the truth. I think it's also a case of Chikage holding himself to another standard. It's okay if his brother betrays him. That's his little brother, of course he can accept it. But it isn't okay that Chikage betrayed him, and everyone else who tried to be a family with him. Like Chikage is taking the blunt of his actions more brutally. And i think it can reflect on the idea of Chikage mostly taking it all upon himself, that he's the one who has to manage and know not to hurt others. If he says the truth about his living condition with his mom and step dad, it could be indicative on how stuff happened there, but because of what i said earlier, i'll leave it at that.

It was nice to see them discuss the Spring troupe's play but what i love about it is that, Chikage replies about it in awe on some levels? like "what Clockwork Heart wasn't finished until the very last day? could never have guessed", it means that, he didn't just come to see the Winter troupe plays. Probably because it was easier to hide his attention from Itaru by taking tickets for all the plays, or at least also Itaru's, and also perhaps to collect information on everyone. But it also feels like he got to care about those plays still enough that he's surprised by all of this. Like esp Clockwork which is also a story about grief to an extend. Knowing to lock away something to bring both of you peace until the System stops hunting you down and all. Considering Chikage threatens Hisoka telling him that if the Organization learnt he was alive, they'd destroy everything Hisoka cared for, i wonder if he could project there. Learning to lock away the knowledge that the one he cares for is still alive because the "system" isn't ready for it yaknow? But yes it's weird to see mention of Clockwork without talking about Mizuno, so wild.

Speaking of plays and the way Chikage must have felt watching them: i mentioned how i think seeing Hisoka playing characters uncaring about death/assuring that avoiding death isn't an option, probably messed Chikage up in that level of grief he was into. But i need to remind that MMMBM is a story where Hisoka investigate a murder that happened between siblings, with one of them seemingly "betraying" the other, only then to learn that the death was a mean to free them from the prison that was the obligation the sibling was tied to. I don't think Chikage would have been fully receptive to the whole plot other than "sibling kills siblings" that could have fired him up, but the whole scope of it is so daunting.

Anyway back to the scene itself, i also really like Chikage's sprite here, he looks so nice. AND HELPP. Tsuzuru's thearpy session via Theater winning once again.

i loved to see Sakuya express all of this, it's so good. AND THE HARUGUMI ILLUSTRATION IS SO GOOD. THEY'RE ALL SO CUTE. cat behavior. And the fact that despite all of them piling in, Chikage didn't wake up. That all of them makes him feel safe enough that he can sleep with all of them!! and the way all of them nuzzle next to them. also Tsuzuru's "oh well if you can't beat them." before joining them is so cute to me, the one person who could have opposed to it went, yknow what, fuck it, nap time with the family. They're all so adorable i love this CG so much.

the play was SOOO GOOD. the costumes were all amazing, indeed they all look so nice. Masumi probably was such a lazy wizard the laziness carried to the design ahah. The effects must be incredible yes, it must be a blast to see. I want to see it so bad!! and especially i love Citron's voice acting? like man it really shows how much he improved with Japanese he's so good. and omg for the music. I can imagine yes. Fun fact on the Blooming Live stage what they did for the hot air balloon was that they had a plateform that could move in the crowd in which they sang many songs (a lot of the group songs, but also Captain Sky's pirate song with the platform looking like a pirate ship), and they had a hot air balloon's prop attached to it, it looked SOOOOO cool. I doubt a3 in universe could do that but i still think about it so fondly.

Hisoka teasing Chikage is EVERYTHING, i love it so much. I wonder how everyone sees it now like, Hisoka was clearly distant with Chikage at first, sometimes downright distressed, and now he's there teasing the fuck out of him in pure little sibling behavior. i love them so much. And Homare is always so funny god.

HELPPP the trio of Guillible Kids. to be fair Tenma is going to fall for Chikage's lies a lot. There's a minichat later about how Chikage/Itaru/Citron all team up to lie to Tenma and Tenma is genuinely "i didn't think it was true but the three of them says it is so it must be right???" like. baby. Who allowed them together they're a menace. AND HELPPP. Tsumugi just knows of the loose ends at the company!! as for the Org well. Well! That's a problem for future them! BUT YESS WINTER'S REACTION IS SO MUCH. I love Hisoka worrying, Tsumu and Azuma reassuring him, and Tasuku and Homare teasingly roasting him. They're my troupe i love them so much……….

And the CG is SO GOOD i love the amount of emotions these two show there it's guuuh :(((((. BUT HELP FOR THE TYPO. i'm sure it's a typo but i'm taking the HC of Hisoka stumbling on Japanese as well, because why not, that's so funny.

and yess the hostility between Izumi and Chikage is so funny. they really have a neat dynamic, i love it very much.

One last thing about Chikage i don't know where to put but, Izumi jokes about how Chikage can now help them carrying Hisoka around and Chikage goes dark like "i did that all my life i'm not doing this again" < he says while lying because of course he would do it again, it's Hisoka.

and funnily enough, the very first time Chikage appears in the whole story is when Winter is doing a street act and right after it, Hisoka falls asleep and Tasuku catches him, and it's right when Izumi thinks THIS that Chikage slides into the screen:

IT'S SO SPECIAL TO ME LIKE. Hisoka's own personal taxi forshadowing. But also possibly Chikage seeing Tasuku taking care of Hisoka the way Chikage used to take care of him and having a hard time with the fact that he has to see his little brother, whom he was mourning, having easily replaced him.

(also also also pleaaase read Chikage and Hisoka's Coin talk. They're so freaking cute.)

ok now we can close the book on Chikage, now,

AND KUMOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!! it's going to be fun, how could it not be! I'm of course not saying anything but Kumon's plot is really neat so i hope you'll enjoy it! I hope if it doesn't give you Tenma&Juza content it gives you some fuel to imagine more Tenma&Juza content, this is the best we can hope for!

And for the flowers i shared them earlier when it made sense to share them eheheh :3c but yeah, here's a trip!

Congratulation on knowing more about Chikage!!! Here you go, here you know him, my Menace of a man. God what a good chapter.

Hope you have fun with the others chapters and i'm still looking forward to see your reactions :3c take care!

[eatnightmares]

1.12 fiddler's feast time :)))))))) (<- can't fucking do this anymore i'm at my limit i can't do it i can't-)

they're so cute :((( they're soooooo so cute :((((((((((( but also paigggge :(((((

(guy who works at a restaurant voice) i need that hog dead

THEY'RE SOOOOOO CUUUUUUTE I'M NOT GONNA FUCKING MAKE IIIIITTTTTTTT

"does not require a fleshly sacrifice" bro i hate it here 😭

the state of tech is so interesting like early internet era but some things are still held back bc of the gods' whims...

as if she's already thought about it 😭😭😭

"asked for a gift to be given, offered a gift in return" makes me so crazy when they use the word gift for sacrifice. not what that means!!!! win for religious pseudo cannibalism at least

GWUUUHHHH CARPENTERRRRR SOUNDING SO EXCITED TO EXPLAIN HOW HER FAMILY DID IT. MENTIONING EM BY NAME.

GRINDING MY TEETH INTO DUST. (with a certain loyalty) i can't stand them he wants to give her the right answer and make a good impressionnnnnn. carpenter having one of the few things she enjoys about her religion being sharing food...even back in ep1 when she's egging faulkner about getting pancakes...

SHE HAS A LITTLE JEALOUSY IN HER VOICE. KILLING MYSELF 👍👍

exploding exploding exploding. "we're talking about ancient history, laws from 50 years back" PAIGE THAT IS NOT ANCIENT HISTORY

DRIVING ME FUCKING CRAAAAAZYYYYYYYY OH THE WAY THINGS CHANGE OH THE WAYS THEY STAY THE SAME. SO VERY FUCKING NUTS CARPENTER WAS THE FIRST ONE TO OBJECT TO LEGALIZATION.

oh carpenter oh carpenter oh carpenter. i don't even know what to say oh my babygirl

devlin drowned dragged delivered tho am i right...am i right guys...

faulkner wanting to have a proper goodbye for paige is doing things to me. never having had that for his family, his final goodbye with carpenter...

GRAAAAUUGHH. A GODLESS GREETING/FAREWELL. I HOPE YOU CAN FIND A WAY FORWARD THAT MEANS NO ONE ELSE HAS TO GET HURT. FAULKNER'S FINAL INTERACTION WITH A MAIN CHARACTER OTHER THAN CARPENTER AND IT'S THAT. TAKE CARE PAIGE. OUR PAIGE. MAY YOUR PEACE WALK ON WITH YOU FOR A WHILE. WALK ON UNTIL YOU'RE LOST FROM ME.

head in my hands. paige.

listen this is very touching with how she goes on to open up to him but u have to understand how it reads like that fucking sonic fandub bit. "just me and the ocean...just alone with my thoughts..." "hey silver-" "GODDAMNIT"

ok i have to start limiting screenshots b4 i just cap the whole scene but. oooowaaagghhhh. it was refreshing to see some fire in you when you came to speak of the faith. i used to be very much like you faulkner. you can call it a compliment, if you like - but I always forget that you converted. oh, there's always entanglements. I don’t think I feel the same way I used to. i don't understand, but that's okay. 💥💥💥💥💥

liquefies into paste.

head in my hands. the siblingssss

he's so normal. something about carpenter not necessarily taking that last part as a red flag. correcting herself from had that to have that. like to her it's a feeling that's necessary to have at some point but then needs to be let go. she really does see so much of herself in him...she isn't even out yet and she knows he needs to get out too...

(big red flashing sign held up to the audience that says STOP LISTENING NOW U ARE GOING TO GET HURT)

HEY. HEY CAN WE CIRCLE BACK ON THIS. WHAT'S THE ONLY OTHER SACRIFICE WE KNOW HE'S MADE. HEY FAULKNER WHAT DOES THIS MEAN HEY HELLO?

giggling smiling tearing out the floorboards eating drywall etc etc. how very s1 carpenter-core he is in s3. she takes that. accepts it. perhaps he only wishes for me to prove once and for all that i have the courage to finally let you go. yeah, perhaps that's it. do you?

banging my fist against the floor. it's faulkner not understanding her but trying to give her kindness. an escape. paige and carpenter, the unfaithful, the ones who are going to leave him, but he still has love for them and doesn't resent them. what does that make everyone else?

fiona apple voice i resent you for being raised right...i resent you for being so sure...i resent you presenting your life like a fucking propaganda brochure!!!!!! but i know if i hate you for hating me i will have entered the endless race!!!!!!!!!

i know they're picking grass and putting it in each others laps i know they are

oughh this episode...another top 3 of s1 for me i think...and it's all downhill (emotionally) from here lads 🫡

[1d1195]

oooooooohhhhhh sam you. did. NOT.

both me and harry are so mad at you right now because WHAT ?:?:!/?/?/?- WHEN I TELL YOU I ALMOST CRIED WHEN I SAW THE DIVIDER AND REALIZED THAT WAS THE END😭😭 (all jokes ofc we all adore you)

OMGGGG THAT WAS SOOOOOO GOOD I CANT😫 meeting her dad and everything he said was adorableee, and, ofc i didn’t like them arguing but it was very realistic !!! and i love how you wrote it bc it is hard to be vulnerable with things like that especially when you’re already stubborn and not someone who opens up😭 and him !!! i knowww that man wanted to cave so bad but he just couldn’t WHICH IS ALSO SOOOO REAL WHEN YOURE SUPER STUBBORN i understood both sides (can you tell how hard headed i am lol)

OK NOOWWWW MY THOUGHTS ON THE PREVIOUS DING PARTS YAY (i’ve been writing them down until i could send this): WHEN HE DIDNT EVEN CARE ABT WINNING HE WAS JUST LOOKING FOR HERRRR OMFGGGG I MELTED (there’s a taylor swift lyric abt this she says: “where’s the trophy? he just comes running over to me !!☺️” ITS SO THEM), the way they’re so obsessed with each other they can’t focus on anything ??😫😫😫 i feel so bad MC keeps getting dragged into remembering that shitty date and i am SO interested in her backstory !!!!! THE WAY YOU SET THAT UP ??? I WAS SO INTO IT I NEED TO KNOW RIGHT AWAY OMGGGG just everything you do is perfect honestly thank you SO MUCH for your writing, you have NO idea how much i look forward to it, like seriously when i see that you’ve updated i make SURE i get some alone time so i can enjoy that fic😉

i cannot wait until the next part bc i was def hooked but now im hooked 😭😭

i don’t have much to update on but one of the weddings happened !! it was so much fun getting to see everyone i used to know, lots of people flew in and it was amazing we all kept saying how it felt like old times. i caught ANOTHER cold :(( it came out of nowhere its just a sore throat and stuffy nose but omggg is it annoying, ive never really had bad allergies or anything like that before so idk what this is but its pissing me off😭

howve you been ??? tell me everything i hope you have the best day ever today <3

~🎶

“Me and Harry are so mad at you” that’s so real 🤣

I am also insanely stubborn and hide stuff. I hate being vulnerable. No one has ever let me—including myself. So it was cathartic to write that scene tbh. But I am stubborn through and through for sure.

I love the T-swift analogy. That’s so cute! 💕 they are obsessed with each other at the end of the day. They’re sweet I think 🥰

I feel like recently I have gotten more creative in setting up backstory and showing not telling kind of thing.

Honestly, May has been really rough. I’m kinda struggling. But I’ll be okay. Just a lot at once. That’s great about the wedding. It sounds like a lot of fun! A cold is no good. That’s how I feel rn. I think it might be allergies because it seems to be subsiding already from yesterday.

I hope you have a fantastic rest of your week 💕 can’t wait to hear from you again!

Xoxo

[oneofthepowerful]

May 22nd 2024 - Blog 5

Hi everyone, and welcome to the next development blog!

First of all...

I apologise for not being consistent in my upload schedule! I wanted to upload a blog every week or so, but it's been over 2 months! Though I have been working on things which we shall discuss in this blog!

Rigging

Since the last blog, what progress has been made to Hoshi's test head rig? I mentioned last time I was working on the turnaround, so what progress have I made since then? Well... nothing noteworthy sadly. Life got pretty busy and there was other things I needed to put time into which we shall get into in a bit.

Though that doesn't mean I haven't need rigging at all! Quite the opposite actually!

For starters, I wanted to make a full body rig of my avatar for a animated short that is in indefinite hiatus, so I don't know if I will finish it or not. For this project, I wanted to practice rigged animation for One of the Powerful, however I didn't get too far. Though I learned a lot making this full-body rig, which I will put into future rigs!

After that, last week I wanted to make a rigged animation of a character who I will not elaborate on due to spoilers and well... here is what I made:

I made the rig for this character in a few hours, a lot quicker than Hoshi's head rig, that's for sure! While this rig is very unpolished and can't turn her head and can only bend what you see in the animation - as a test rig, I am pretty proud of this!

This was also a lot quicker to animate than if it were frame by frame although I will admit... I struggle to animate in Blender. I've noticed that animating rigs in Blender at this point in time is difficult, as there is soooooo many things to keep track off, and if you aren't careful the animation can easily get messed up with parts of the character deforming and moving when you don't want them to. T-T

However this is what the final series could potentially look like! Just a lot more polished as this rig and animation was a super quick job. (The final series will look better I promise!)

Outline Rewrite

So during the last month or so, I have finally decided to mostly rewrite the current outline of the series. I wrote the original outline back in 2022 during my free time at school, and I honestly didn't have as many things planned out as I do now. For an example the antagonists didn't have much a reason for doing what they are doing except: "hehe I want Powerful to suffer!" really basic and not well written. Where as now, I have all the characters a lot more fleshed out! So far I have only touched up the first two seasons which I shall elaborate on:

Season 1

The first half of season 1 (the first 3 episodes) have basically stayed the same writing wise! The only major change being Hoshi's fight in Episode 3. At the time of storyboarding it last year, I was very stumped and not very inspired. Now however, I have a much better idea of how I want the scene to play out, to add to the mystery of Hoshi's backstory.

The later half of season 1, mainly the finale has changed a lot from its original conception. I won't say much other than... things happen! season 1 has more of a focus seeing a snippet of Powerless Territory in episode 1, to then seeing how Powerful Territory (near the boarder at least) has it's own problems from dealing with the Powerless conflict.

As well as this, season 1 focuses mostly on Hoshi and his whole deal. With each passing episode, him getting more and more on edge about... something! And by the end of season 1, you see an inside to a little bit of his problems which he will continue to overcome and confront in season 2.

Down below is some concept art of Season 1!!

Season 2

Season 2 has more of a focus on Seaside as well as focusing on the main trio! We see Erin learn more about... things... we get a proper insight to Cassidy's problems, as well as Hoshi trying overcome things from his past!

We get to meet some of the residents of Seaside, and a snippet of the lore of the location! Seaside is a paradise for Powerful and Seaside born Powerless. and So it is important that it is protected at all cost! This season is around 17 episodes, as we focus on many things that will be built up as the story progresses! Season 2 is a lot of fun! and I can't wait to eventually start working on it!

I can't really say much on season 2 for obvious reasons and as of right now I am re-outlining season 3! I won't say much either, except this is the season where Erin starts to go down a darker path, and the season 3 finale is really exciting and ends on a big cliff hanger!

Which takes us to season 4, where we finally see the Erin with the short hair! I am debating whether this to be the final season or not (I guess we will see when I outline it all!)

Upcoming plans

After the series is fully outlined, where does that take us? Well... I want to take some time to flesh out the environments of Powerful Territory and Seaside, as I felt like my background designs are bland and can be more creative and unique! So each location the trio visit in season 1 will (hopefully) be more distinct and memorable from one another!

Aside from all of this, I have been working on updating character references for the trio to keep them on model!

Ever wanted to know the Erin, Cassidy and Hoshi's height? Well here is the height chart for them:

Yes they are all super short XD I will mention that Hoshi is tiny for a plot reason, a hint is that he does not take care of himself, but starting from season 2 - when he is mentally in a relatively better place and has a much better support system. Hoshi will gradually become taller and broader as the series progresses!

I recently finished a turnaround + expression reference sheet of Erin! This took me forever to draw as I was trying to keep it all consistent, and I felt the pressure to make this as good as I could for my portfolio. XD

This turnaround will be used as a rigging guide, so it's important it is as consistent it can be for that purpose!

And alas, that is what I've been doing since the last blog! Thank you for reading! Until next time!

[orpheuslookingback]

okay some general oscar nomination thoughts i guess lol:

Like most everyone else, I do think it's dumb that Greta Gerwig didn't get a directing nomination. Dumb that the Academy seems to be operating on a "one woman director" cap (there's literally only been one year ever I think when 2 women were nominated in the same year and I think it was the year Emerald Fennel and Chloe Zhao were both nominated?) when there's so many great films directed by women this year. I haven't seen Past Lives yet, but from what I've heard Celine Song probably deserved a nomination, too (maybe even more than Greta Gerwig). And I also haven't seen Anatomy of a Fall, but I am happy Justine Triet got in there for a nomination. Also at least that last spot didn't go to Bradley Cooper instead lol.

But in all honesty I don't really think Barbie was super snubbed otherwise? I know some people think it was but honestly I think 8 nominations is a really strong amount. And in all honesty, I'm kind of lukewarm about it getting a screenplay nomination, I don't think its really close to as strong as some of the other nominees in either screenplay category. And as much as I really like her and think she did deliver that monologue really well, I'm not sure America Ferrera should have gotten in over some of the other performances that could be in the Supporting category (especially I'm thinking of Julianne Moore and Rosamund Pike both getting left out for what were imo overall stronger performances)

I guess Maestro did get nominations in both lead acting categories and like. I admittedly haven't seen it. But based on word of mouth it probably shouldn't have lol. Also was it getting a screenplay nomination at all expected??

It seems like the actual Best Actor race is probably gonna be between Paul Giamatti and Cillian Murphy, but I am glad that Jeffrey Wright still at least did get a nomination. I loved American Fiction and he was soooooo good in it.

I've already said this but the biggest disappointment for me is no Charles Melton in Supporting Actor. He's so fantastic in that film. I like them both and they both gave good performances but I would've liked to see him there over either Ryan Gosling or Sterling K Brown (glad Brown is getting his first oscar nomination at least though he is a great actor) (and I can't really judge it against Robert De Niro or Mark Ruffalo since I haven't seen either of those movies, though I will say it might've been nice to see someone new get a nom vs people who have gotten several already, regardless).

May December getting snubbed in general sucks. It's a great movie. As I already also said, Julianne Moore is also so good in it and probably also should have gotten a Supporting nomination. Natalie Portman is also really good in that film but I'm less upset about her not getting a nomination than I am about the other two. Also in the Supporting Actress race, I'm not sure Emily Blunt should be there? She has one really great scene in Oppenheimer but idk other than that, I think there were other stronger performances this year that could be in this category (again see Julianne Moore and Rosamund Pike).

I haven't seen Elemental but it seems pretty clear that it shouldn't be in the best animated category over something that seems like a much better film like the newest TMNT movie. Kinda tired of the sense that Disney-Pixar often get an obligatory nom just for like. Making something, regardless of its actual quality. Happy for Nimona making it in though.

Based on what I've heard about Past Lives (which I know I really really need to see) it seems like honestly Greta Lee not getting a Best Actress nomination is a worse snub in terms of quality of performance than Margot Robbie not getting one, which honestly...I'm not super mad about? I think she's really good in Barbie but I also don't think its one of those performances where it feels like a massive injustice that it didn't get nominated, in terms of the actual quality of the performance.

I don't think its gonna win much but I am rooting for American Fiction in general.

Those are my main thoughts rn? Idk they'll probably change/grow as I watch more of the nominated films, which, right now on top of my watchlist are Anatomy of a Fall, The Holdovers, Past Lives, and Poor Things, and I guess eventually I'll get to Killers of the Flower Moon even though I am. Not usually the world's biggest fan of 3 and a half hour films lol.

[evansbby]

Heyyyyyyyyyyy!

Read ur new fic today bestieeee😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Ohk tell me are u soooooo amazing I just can't get enough of every thing u writeeee😵‍💫😭😭🤤🫡

This was soooooo chef kissesss🤌🤌🤌🤌

I liked every second of the fic sooooo much , I read it in the morning and now again Im gonna re-read it again

And the detailssssss👁️👄👁️

Not him making making her climax for 4 timessss

Sdhkdghhjkkkjjkkkkkk

And the repetition of he deserved this??

Was he trying to supress his conscience or whatt???

Honestly I don't know for some strange reason I found that hot tooo🤤

Telling her to call him captain then commanding her to call him daddyy

Sdshjkhhdsghjjkk

And then his thoughts about being her daddy , wanting to take care of her🥺

I'm in love I'm in love I'm in loveeeeeee I'm in loveeee I'm in loveeeeeee I'm in loveeeeeee I'm in loveeeeeeee💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

This was an awwww momentttt, my heart got all squishyyyyyyy🥹🥹🥹

Also my sizeee kink went brrrrrrrrrrrrr😮‍💨

And the kisssssssesssesssss scene

OMG OMGG OMGGG OMGGGG OMGGGGG OMGGGGGG OMGGGGGGGG OMGGGGGGG

Him kissing her again and again and again was soooooo cuteeeee🤭

My heart swelledddl😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫💗🥹🫡

The smearing her blodddddd wasssd soooo fucking dirtyyyy omgggg I loved ittytt I was seeing stars behind my eyes on God I swearrrrr it was soooooo hotyyy sooooo sexyyyyy sooooooooooo sexyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy uhhhhhhhhhhh I got so truned in bestieeee 😗✋😗✋🫡🫡🫡🫡

And him waking her up when she passed outtttt and then she passed out again in the enddddd

Asdgsjakakahaaahnshsjksk

Bestieeeeeeeeeeeee how do I literally write my the dirtest deepest fantasy of people soooooo fucking wellll.....u have to understand that was way tooo hot to handle and put it into words about how I wassss feeling I was feeling like I'm burning upp like I'm sitting in am ovennnnn the temp was fucking rising and itsss December 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫🫡🫡🫡🫡😵😵

I loved the ficcc soooo muchhh ,u have to understand u r my fav I'm literally in this dead fandom for just for u otherwise I would have deleted the appl I loveee everything u write evry fuckinggg peiceee u writeeee,

💗💗💗💗🥹🥹🥹🥹💗💗💗💗

I love ur Andy slander tooo 😂

And also when u said this was gonna be dark fic I assumed it will be veryyyyyy dark but honestly it was sooo much better than poyt 1 part likeas in this Steve was a Lil Lil teeenyyyy tinnyyyy but betterrr than poyt Steve, less dark more softttt , and I bought poytbsteve because I can't help it I'm obsessed with his mfing toxic ass💀 I can't help but compare everyone with him ok may be this Steve be more dark but like he was a Lil softer than him during sex like in this stve kisses herrrrrrr I mean that countssss and not once but again'and again and he was entirely enjoying itttt omggggg skkkkkkskkskkskssookkkkkk soooooooooooooo cuteeeeeeeee

The spiting scene was wasss veryyy hot bestieeeeeeeeeeeee 👁️👄👁️

Sending loveeee 💗💗💗💗

-💗(is this emoji take)

omg bestie this is so sweet! I love your enthusiasm and all your emojis! Thank you soooo much! 🥹🥹🩷🩷🩷

anddd omg did he make her orgasm 4 times??? Or was it 5 times??? I don’t remember hehe

I loved writing them kissing so much!!! I wasn’t planning on it but I went with the flow and Steve really seemed to be into kissing reader 🩷🩷 again and again and again as you said 😂😂 she was just too cute to resist 🥹🥹🥹

Also bestie pls come out of the oven!!! Omg 🤭🤭🤭🥹🥹🥹🥹 no but seriously I’m so happy you liked it so much!!! It truly means the most to me!

I don’t think this Steve is any softer than poyt!Steve but THIS Steve kinda knows what he wants, so if he wants to kiss her then he’ll kiss her and he won’t suppress that for himself!!! Hehehe

I’m so happy you’re still in this fandom for my blog bestie it means the world! 🥹🙏🏼🩷

[dominikadecember]

I FORCED MY LIVEWATCH ONTO MY FRIENDS NOW Y'ALL GET TO ENJOY

Okay, I got pizza, i've got a drink, i've peed, lets start this

omg i knew they chose the perfect alex via taylor cus of his BDE but holy shit dude can do sensitive too and we're just a minute in!!!!!!!!

omg the blank was hilarious in the trailer but it's soooooo much funnier in full speed. I AM CACKLING

their interactions are perrrrrrfect!!!!!

the cake scene, is so uncomforttable. i cant watch this but i need to watch this but OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is the best thing that has happened since sliced bread

you may want to put me on mute bc holy shit i don't know i how ill get through two hours of this mornons

the opening credits are a perfect choice for this movie/book

sarah shahi just keeps getting prettier

uma is the perfect person to be cast as alex's ma and us prezzie

Best line ever 'There is no getting out of this." 'What if I set myself on fire?' 'We'd ship the ashes to Heathrow.' I LOVE ZAHRA!!!!!!!!

DAVID THE DOG IS MENTIONED I HOPE HE IS IN THE MOVIE LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS

ugh loads of london sights, so boring SHAAN IS HOT AS FUCK

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD ENEMY ACT I LOVE IT I CANNOT WAIT FOR THE FREINDS AND THEN THE LOVERS OMG OMG OMGGGGGGG

henry needs all the makeup bc he's a pretty boy but alex is fucking FAAAAAINE

ughhhhh i love this movie so much imma cry

lmfao alex just called queen victoria 'vicky' in an interview and henry looks like he had a stroke

this is so good, the book closet vs movie closet scene is so well done i am so happy

taylor's. fucking. eyelashes. someone made this boy a maybeline ad from birth

AMY THE BODYGUARD DESERVES HER OWN SHOW

OMG THE MOMENT WHERE THEY REALISE THEY MAYBE POSSIBLY ARE NOT ENEMIES BUT JUST MISUNDERSTOOD EACH OTHER I AM SWOOOOOOONING

yaaaas ppl owning their privilege and being honest they may not be perf is mah jammmm

is alex in this movie not supposed to realise he is bi before he hooks up with henry like in the book? bc taylor has chemistry with EEEEEEEERRRRYBODY

omg they're starting to be friendsssssss

THE TURKEY SCENE OMG OMG

I love how they filmed the messaging scenes. So interesting.

alex's political career! i love this plot!!!

Zahra is srsly so fucking pretty

Nora is gorgeous as hell tooooooooo!!!!!!!! Everyone in this movie is absolutely perfect and pretty and i love them

Henry is just a dorky dork with dorkdom

THE CINEMATOGRAPHY IS EXQUISITE!!!!!!

ummm how did alex not get mono at this damn NYE party???

THE KISS THE KISS IS HAPPENING THE KISS OMFG THE KISS OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG I AM OMG!!!!!!

Nora is great but she's like a mix of Nora and June and idk how to feel about it.

OMG ALEX IS DESCRIBING THE KISS AND HOLY SHIT

WOW

Nora and Alex being besties works rllllllly well

lmao alex ignoring an ex for henry was the most obvious thing ever how did no one realise?????

OH MY GOD I CANT THIS MOVIE IS GONNA KILL ME

THE LONGING HOLY SHIT

THE FUN FLIRTY THING IS HAPPENING NOW AND I AM HERE FOR IT

HENRY IS VERY MUCH INTO BEING ORDERED BY ALEX AND I LOVE IT

THIS

IS

VERY

STEAMY

HOLY SHIT

Wow, someone said 'I'm bisexual' and it feels really fucking awesome.

THEY ARE SO CUTE AND HOT

casual hooking up' stage YOU TWO ARE IN LOVE STAHP LYING TO YOURSELVES

OMG OMG OMG MY BRAIN IS MELTING

my cat keeps on walking in and out scared cus i keep shouting OH MY GOD SO SORRY TYMEK ALSO NICHOLAS GALITZINE ON A HORSE IS ABSOLUTELY A FANTASY OF MINE

HOLY SHIT THAT IS GUNNERSBURY PARK THEY FILMED IN GUNNERSBURY PARK AND NO ONE THOUGHT TO TELL ME?! RUDE AS FUCK!!!! I COULD HAVE BEEN THERE AND MADE NICHOLAS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME!!!!

'I think we should make love tonight'

'Um...yeah...I'm down' BOY PLS HOW DID YOU EVER GET LAID?????? 😂😂😂😂😂😂

I can't they are so fucking hot and cute and how is this okay??????????????????????

sorry heteros, no movie will ever have a love scene as beautiful as this movie

oh shittttt an argument between alex and ellen and alex going 'yes madam president' instead of 'yes mom' DAAAAAAAMN

Alex excited about stuff is lovely and Taylor is a very pretty boi

The CGI is pretty crappy but thankfully it doesn't feature way too much.

THEY ARE SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!

THE ZAHRA SCENE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED

OH MY GOD THIS SCENE IS EVERYTTTTTTHING AND IS SO FUNNY OMG OMG OMG OMG

Shit. Alex coming out to his ma scene was beautiful and it hurt and it was perfect.

omg they are all so cute and perfect and cowboyy??? i am 100000000% into the cowboy!!!!!!!! and nicholas' voice, i forgot thhat the boy can sing!

ALEX YOU ARE IN LOVE IT BE OKAY

They changed from the book that alex's parents are together and not divorced and i think it works so well.

THEY ARE DOMESTIC IN THEIR BUBBLE AND CUTE AS FUCK AND TAYLOR IS GLISTENING WITH WATER AND I CANNOT HANDLE THIS

Oh no, this bit, this bit is sad, there is sad angst coming

THE ONLY REASON WHY I AM NOT CRYING AT RN IS BC THE CINEMATOGRAPHY AGAIN IS FUCKING GORG

1 hour and 17 minutes in. First fucking sighting of David the dog. Unbelievable. HE IS THE TRUE STAR OF THIS MOVIE!!!

sad angsty angst ☹️

'what if he won't see me?' OMG MY HEART

aw man, i wish we would have seen the dramatic scene where alex is at the palace gates screaming to be let in like that eric andre meme

there better be thousand deleted scenes

wooooooooah this confrontation is so much more powerful than in my book, these boys are such good actors omg

alex boy you're gonna catch a cold with that wet shirt 🙁 i think most of it is your tears than the rain

THAT BETTER BE ALEX'S BLUE HOODIE!

ugh, so jelly they got to have a museum all to themselves at night no less

also the V&E has never looked that nice whenever i've been there

'just a daft pubescent fantasy' BOY THAT'S HOW I LIVE

OMG THIS IS SO

OMG

'HISTORY HUH?! BET WE COULD MAKE SOME' THEY DID THIS SO FUCKING PERFECT OMG

WHEN DOES THE HAPPY EVER AFTER HAPPEN???? HENRY JUST WANNA KISS HIS BOY IN PUBLIC OMG

DAVID THE DOG IS BACK

Oh right, this fucking thing

The boys being outed by asshats

ofc miguel is involved, fuck off dipshit

Alex is fantastic at politics and I am in love with how fiercly he is protecting his and henry's relationship

ZAHRA IS SO DONE WITH THIS LOVESICK PUPPY SHIT I LOVE HER

ZAHRA IS MY HERO

OH MY GOD

I AM NOT OKAY EITHER HENRY

lmao you gossipy bitches

stephen fry in DA HOUSE!

lmao homophobia in the royal house here plaaaaay!

lmao when the king says 'i have read your emails all of them' alex is tots thinking 'they were hot weren't they' and henry is thinking 'fuckityfuck alex talks about my crack ☹️'

ALEX STANDING UP FOR HIS BOY IN FRONT OF ROYALTY GETS ME EVERYTIME

OMG YAAAAAAAAAS DA PUBLIC LOVES THEIR GAY PRINCE BOI!!!!

lmao philip 'you can't go out there' WHAT YOU GONNA DO? STOP THEM FIT BOYS WITH YOUR PASTY ASS STICK ARMS???

THEY. ARE. SO. CUTE.

you know it's fiction when texas has become a democratic state

THEY ARE SO FUCKING CURE

ARGHH THE CINEMATOGRAPHY IS SOOOOOO PRETTTTTTY

That is absolutely not the house I imagined.

OH NO IT'S OVER 🙁 BUT I LOVED IT SO MUCH OMG OMG OMG IT'S SO GOOD EVERYONE WATCH IT IMMEDIATELY!

lmao there's a bit at the end of the credit with the cake scene and alex going 'do you think anyone noticed?' i love this idiot so much

[thatonegayship]

Dear LORD, have I been holding on for this gracious fic to float into my hands, and I am slurping it up like water in the palms of a dying man. Just letting everyone know that I got to peep the earlier concept and play a bit of paper doll with OP because I am so special and cool and sometimes we brush each other's hair while swapping secrets :3 It's like I was let into a Very Exclusive Club and now I get to point at little things like "OH! OH! I KNOW THIS THING I KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING!!!" I loved seeing your vision for this un-muddled by outside input- it's such a reward reading what makes your brain churn and do a little happy dance!!!!!! Very much a Fan of the build up, and now I must gush about it all to you because you are so important.

The way you set the scene is SOOOOO good. I was already kicking my feet at the knives and gore warning at the top, but your little sprinkles of scenery really added to the ambiance! Very much a Dark and Foreboding place poor Dipper has been born into. His parents are even worse NOW than they were in his previous life if they willingly let their baby boy just LIVE in that sort of environment! Seriously! No enrichment at all!!! Very mad, very sad, this place is bad, poor little lad :(

I love the subversion of expectations with the whole Human Sacrifice thing going on, at least at the start. It makes sense that they would value humans at least somewhat over livestock and not just go all willy-nilly slasher style on their volunteer, when all they really need is a bit of blood. I don't know why, it's the fact that Dipper was forced against his will, but ultimately didn't expect things to escalate to the extent that they did that makes that eventual payoff so nice. I was reading through it at first, and for a moment I was like ??? Why isn't he freaking out more? It's a HUMAN SACRIFICE!!! Freak out! Scream! Bite someone's ear off if you can! It didn't occur to me that Dipper might not be freaking out that hard because he didn't think it would be that *bad.* Of course, human sacrifices are hard to get people behind generally, but it's worse when your cult is already small. The "sacrifice" is more symbolic than anything. Like donating blood! Only there are no needles or sweet treats at the end and also they decide that your offering wasn't sufficient enough and now they need to de-juice you.

Being a sad, angsty girl myself, I was actually a massive fan of the whole blood letting thing, and now it has taken over my brain. You're telling me they just pulled Dipper's arm out and slashed him like that??? Ohhh mama, I am ENJOYING this. Firstly, because now Bill's gotta get all fussy over his little injury and bandage it all up and give Dipper confusing feelings since No One Has Ever Done That For Him Before. And also??? THE SCAR???? Presuming Bill doesn't just magic it all better, nothing gets my dick harder than a big, fat scar that symbolizes soooooo much pain and anguish. That was the day he almost *died.* Hear that? They were gonna hold him down and slash his other arm out of zealous frenzy and Let Him Die. I'm embellishing since we don't know for *sure,* but we do. Deep down, we do. And Isn't it just fantastic that I get to let my little brain run wild in your story and turn everything dark and sad because Dipper's just sooooo pathetic, he needs kisses to keep going? I love how you set this up more logically; I just expected them to hold him down and for the priest guy to ready his knife over Dipper's heart with some blah blah yada yada prayer about spiritual nourishment, before BOOM! Bill kicks down the door and makes out sloppy style in front of the zealous on-lookers.

NGL, had my heart pounding just before the letting. Like, of course I can't actually feel it, but I could *feel* it, you know? Amazing descriptive powers, you beamed me with the pain on full blast and I instinctively clasped my wrist out of sympathy. May whoever pushed Dipper out of line always be out of toilet paper and have severe stomach problems.

It's funny that the priest didn't actually expect any of this to work. You'd think the leader would have more faith in his own religion, but it likely started getting to his head that maybe *he* was a sort of god, too, or at least a Very Special Human. To be fair, it seems he's convinced them to go pretty dang far down the rabbit hole of craziness, and farther still to the point that they actually suggested *Bleeding Dipper More.* Okay, okay, so it's clear from earlier texts that Dipper was a clear nay-sayer throughout this whole experience, and likely asked some Not Easy questions that got the other cult members in a tizzy, so I'm assuming some of it was just plain ol' meanness and wanting to punish him more, because screw THAT guy for thinking for himself when they have a perfectly good latin book full of outdated facts and several torn out pages. I get the feeling the congregation was against him from the start, and it just so happened they saw an opportunity to make shit worse for him, because why not? They ALREADY cut his tongue out! Might as well go the full mile and ruin what little life he has left, right?

God, I am EXCITED to see Bill's reaction once he realizes Dipper's tongue is missing. Honestly, I'd love to read about Dipper actually *losing* said tongue- yes, I am an angst junky, I want to read about him screaming and fighting and sobbing and begging and fighting some more while he's being held down and the crowd sings over his screams with various verses in blissful indifference. I want him to SHAKE afterwards, and to be so freaking traumatized, mentally and physically. How long does it take him trying to speak to accept that no one understands him, and no one's listening? Do they sew his wound with a needle and thread, or cauterize it to stop the bleeding? Does he lose his appetite? Does he still feel his non existent tongue in his mouth? How long does the pain last? Does it ever truly go away? These are the important questions I offer you today.

Yes yes sorry, so Bill is blissfully unaware that his lovely husband has been properly de-tongued, and now he can't get frisky and french kiss his freaking face off, not unless he wants to feel like a worm in a bowl. To see his reaction once he realizes would be AMAZING, but I'm also looking forward to the miscommunication, because you just *know* he's gonna get suspicious real quick over Dipper's vow of silence. Huh? Can't talk at *all?* Come on! He's your sticking god, for christ's sake! He's giving a green light here! Say what you like! Have a blast! Run wild with it! Just freaking SOMETHING! Dipper is very >:( about his god openly mocking him for his tongue-less-ness, since- well, turns out this god IS real, which likely means a chunk of what he learned about him would *also* be real. So of COURSE Bill knows his tongue was cut out! It's hard to miss the first couple of weeks he spent curled in on himself, moaning with pain and aguish and shame while healing from his injuries, and the months proceeding that he had to get used to the idea of never speaking again. At the very least, he heard the snide remarks his fellow cult members made on Dipper's behalf, since this is all just Their God exacting Revenge on him for Speaking Out of Turn. Bill is so, so cruel for his little game.

Oh, but how SWEET that stab was! I actually squealed. Short, sweet, inconsequential. Bill dusts his hands off and goes on with his day, because he gives zero shits about some hack running a sub-par cult in his name, when really, the guy just had a massive ego and enjoyed ordering everybody around. Didn't even use one of Bill's artifacts! That's how you KNOW he's a poser! Talk about a let down! Bill lifts his spirits by making the cult members do the chicken dance, before giving his husband's new form a decent look! Huh! STILL cute, as all the other ones were! A bit shaken, and looking pretty pale from the blood loss, but if there isn't something in those eyes! His soul's just swimming around in em! Bill can't wait to pamper and annoy him in their new life together! I am very excited to see how it comes to pass <3

Incredible, stellar, kissing you kissing you kissing you!!! I truly enjoyed the whole thing- sorry if I missed any crucial details, I am very tired sadly and typing this moments before blacking out, so I will just say it again: LOVE IT!!!! Eating it out of your hands like a skittish, hesitant horse who, up til now, hasn't taken a liking to any of the riders on pa's farm, but for whatever reason, lets you near enough to brush my matted mane.

Here's a thing! Reincarnation of Dipper who's not in the best of situations. (A Cult)

Got some gore and knives in here so watch out!

In the room of ritual, everything is ready. 

Off in that wide and majestic space, the candles are lit. The circle is drawn. The altar spread with gold and trinkets, little offerings of delight and whimsy, tomes of knowledge. Along with the remnants of the latest sacrifice, dried in long trails down the stone.

The tomes, though. If one looked closely, they would see mostly encyclopedia volumes from like, sixty years ago. Because, yeah, those are going to be so tempting for a being of infinite knowledge.

Long chanting rings through the hallways, preparing the way. The ritual is in less than an hour. In preparation for the service, the servants of their lord make themselves presentable. 

Dipper adjusts his robe - too big for him, by at least one size- and pulls at the neckline. It always drags up against his throat, in a tight, uncomfortable way. He tugs it down again, glaring into the small mirror on the otherwise bare wall.

Bill Cipher is the most powerful being in the universe, and his reach is infinite and his discernment of the mind and mastery of mysteries is unquestionable, yadda yadda yadda. 

Dipper just. Doesn’t know what everyone else here expects to happen. Especially with the setup unchanged from the one he saw last year. And the year before that. And the one before that. 

Odds are, this ritual is going to end up the same as every other one. 

Pointless.

Dipper adjusts his robes again, and smooths out the front with slow strokes. As long as this is going to happen, he might as well avoid drawing attention to himself. He’s had enough ‘attention’ for more than a lifetime.

There’s a rhythm to these ceremonies.  Dipper hears the footsteps, and easily tucks the hood of his robe up, only semi-stumbling as he joins the twin lines of robed figures leading into the ritual room. 

As he tucks his hands together, covering them with long sleeves - Dipper spends another moment to silently sigh. 

He joins the line, ducking his head as he joins in formation. The two lines of followers shuffle on with their long robes brushing the floor. He can hear them whispering to each other; varying levels of excitement, boredom. Talking about plans for after the ritual. He thinks he picks up one of the more devout members, almost humming with anticipation.

Despite the murmurs, the sight itself could be quite impressive. An all-seeing eye, if it was real, might even appreciate it.

Still, all these dramatics are so over the top. Just as fruitless and stupid as every other prayer, or ritual. Never worked before, not gonna work now. Dipper’s not sure why they’re trying the same freakin’ thing, over and over again.

For a bunch of people obsessed with the infinite power and knowledge Cipher represents, they haven’t accrued any. 

And for that matter! If Bill Cipher’s eye is truly all-seeing, why hasn’t he ever responded? His triangle is emblazoned on every wall, and on their robes. You can’t look at a surface without seeing it staring back at you, and there’s no short of devout worshipers, constantly praying and doing rites. 

Dipper dares a glance at one of the long scrawls on the walls, seething slightly at the handwriting. And the grammar.

If he was watching, surely he would have spoken up by now. Even if it’s just to critique the decor, which is tacky as hell.

The main ritual room fills up with warm bodies, and Dipper stands in an inconspicuous place. Just to the left, and not quite entirely in the back. At the front of the room, he can see the priest nodding approvingly, hands tucked behind his back. 

Hidden under the sleeves, Dipper clenches his hands together. Breathing out a silent prayer of his own, to nobody particular. He can stand stock-still through one or two more ridiculous rituals, if it means no more prayers to a blind idiot god.

A week. Maybe two. That’s it.

Then he’ll be out of these robes, and far, far away from here. He’ll never see these people again. He’ll never have to chant a single verse again in slightly incorrect Latin. He’ll never have to kneel, or go before that stone altar again, not even once.

The outside world is - there’s a lot of talk about it. There’s always a lot of talk, more or less colored by personal experiences and levels of permission to go ‘outside’. Dipper’s learned, now, that well over ninety percent of the gossip is lies. 

If his palms still sweat at the prospect, it’s because it’s… New. Different. But it can’t possibly be worse than here, and, like. Novelty is condoned by his not-really-a-god. Trying new things should be standard doctrine - if the priest wasn’t a total idiot.

Not much longer, now. 

Out there, things will be better. Out there, Dipper will have a chance at having a life. 

And there won’t be any trouble, since he’ll keep his mouth shut.

 “Children of Cipher!” The high-pitched voice of the priest rings tinnily through the air. “We are once again assembled!”

Dipper bows in concert with his fellows. Staring at the ground is a good way to not roll his eyes. 

A chant rises up, and he keeps his lips clamped together as he mirrors the ritual bowing and scraping and general genuflection. The priest will go on and on, no matter what he does. 

All it takes to get through this is time. Another round of kneeling, then standing, then kneeling, until they stand at the last word in a thronging chorus.

“Brothers!” A louder, shriller call, now that everyone has been drawn close to a fervor. For all his faults, the priest does know how to read the mood - “Tonight is a special evening!” His arms thrown up, spindly and bare as the sleeves drop near to his shoulders. “Who will bleed for our god?”

The only thing that prevents Dipper from flinching is how much attention that would draw.

He hardly dares to breathe, lest some wayward motion be taken as ‘enthusiasm.’ 

Dipper keeps his head bowed, as murmurs start up around him and  his forehead starts to prickle with sweat. 

Sacrifices happen all the time. Mostly animals. Last year they got a goat, and that was considered a pretty big one and the stew afterwards was filling, and probably tasted pretty good. 

Human blood, though. That’s - They haven’t done this in years. 

The susurration of voices in the background grow louder, and Dipper stays bowed in place. Of course nobody wants to volunteer; ‘willing’ isn’t easily found when it comes to getting a knife in your flesh - but someone’s going to bleed, tonight. The ‘volunteer’ bit will be justified by whatever’s convenient.

Around him there’s murmurs, a few, low arguments. Tension is starting to rise, but for the most part, he’s being overlooked.

He nearly thinks he’s gotten away with it, too, when a hard shove on his back sends him stumbling forward.

“Here, brothers!” The voice rings in Dipper’s ears as he tries to backtrack, slipping on the robes of the person in front of him and dropping painfully to the floor. “The provider!”

Shit, shit, shit. 

Dipper tries to glance back at whatever asshole pushed him, but the crowd’s already grouped together into a bunch of faceless clumps, drawing back from his fall. 

He levels the worst glare he can manage, even as both his arms are seized by two of his so-called ‘brothers’. The big ones. 

Gritting his teeth, Dipper digs in his heels. Struggling’s ineffective, protesting’s impossible. Gesturing wildly, including a raised finger in the general direction of the asshole who pushed him, Dipper gets dragged to the foot of the altar. 

“See how he offers his flesh! See how he shakes with joy!” The priest jogs his arms in the air. Dipper shakes his head rapidly holding up his hands. “His arms, already offered!”

And for a moment Dipper’s simply annoyed at how obvious it is that the whole damn ritual is a farce. 

“Tonight, we call upon the god! Tonight! We-”

Whatever else he’s yelling about, Dipper doesn’t pay any mind. He’s busy trying to use the loose robes to worm his way out of the guards’ grip. It halfway works, until one of them gets him by the bare wrist and painfully pulls it out.

The cold stone hits his waist. One of his sleeves is drawn to his shoulder. His arm pinned, bare and wrist upraised, on the stone. 

Damn it, if he finds out who shoved him, he’s going to - he arches up, but firm hands hold his shoulders. There’s little time to think about revenge when he’s trying to find a way out of this. Arm, stuck. Shoulders, held. The exits, totally blocked by a bunch of crowded figures. 

In a way, Dipper can’t truly blame them. After all, if the current sacrifice got away, who knows? 

They could be next. 

The priest seems pleased, at least. He paces in front of the altar, gesticulating wildly, and rambling on about god and blood, and other nonsensical bullshit.

Great. They have their ‘sacrifice’ for tonight. So, so super ‘willing’ too, what with how he, quote ‘rushed to offer himself’, end quote. 

Dipper takes a long breath, holding it for three beats. Then he lets it out. 

Okay. If this follows most other ‘human sacrifices’, it should be bearable. Some bloodletting, a nasty scar. Maybe a missing finger, but he’s learned to deal with worse. Push through the moment, wait for it to be over. Soon enough, he’ll be on the other side of this entire godawful situation.

Focusing on the transitory nature of pain helps him steady his breathing. And more importantly, slow his heart rate.

Calming meditation. He can work on that. Though it’s difficult, with the way the priest keeps going on and on about an ‘auspicious night’. Also, the very large, curved, very sharp-looking knife.

Dipper tries his best not to stare at it. Or to linger too much on the thought of knives and flesh and blood. If he could stop thinking, for once in his stupid life, it’ll be over before he knows it.

That’s totally not not the usual knife, though. He wonders where the hell it came from.

Last time, it was some basic utilitarian repurposed chef-thing, with a crudely engraved triangle on the hilt and the blade. This one’s much more… Ceremonial. Sharper, too, with a wicked curve and a gleaming edge, and covered in runes that Dipper’s never seen before.

He mouths a swear as one guard uncurls his fingers from the edge of the altar, turning his wrist back upright. The priest waves the very, very sharp blade around, yelling something that Dipper doesn’t bother parsing, even as his mind races. He can tell it’s definitely not Cipher runes on that thing, and not the old Latin their god prefers. Did someone go outside to find this? Another random artifact that the priest got his hands on? Seems like he’s always picking up useless semi-magic items.

The knife doesn’t feel ‘useless’, though, even from a glance. It radiates a pure and terrifying purpose. 

Especially as it comes down, and rests against his wrist. Almost gently, its point bites a drop of blood from his skin.

The fetid breath of the priest pants over the altar. Dipper turns away, neck twisting as far as he can manage, eyes shut.

Please let this be just a bit. Just a drop. A small, tentative cut to fill a bit of the channels on the stone. There’s a sting to the metal, a slight burn, and though Dipper’s not one of the main Holders of Mysteries or anything, he feels like that’s a very bad sign.

Then he feels. Cold.

It runs down his inner arm, lingering for an instant before blossoming into sharp, bright pain. He nearly chokes on air, cringing into a hunched position as he feels the knife slide.

The catching drag of the old knife would have been painful, but that was mostly used for taking a finger, or maybe dragging across the back of the arm, in a more decorative than productive way of drawing blood. 

The ease with which this knife cuts sends a deep, swirling nausea straight to the pit of his stomach.

“Behold, the flow! The magic gathers, my children!” THe priest’s voice warbles a bit as “With this tool, with this magic, our god will hear our call! He will behold our devotion, and raise us to glory! He will answer-” More and more words, variations on encouragement. Zero substance, all hype. A fanatical motivation speaker, Dipper thinks, half-hysterically. 

Vapid or not, the result is effective. The sight of blood has certainly spurred everyone into a kind of frenzy, whether from fear or fervor, Dipper doesn’t care.

And they’re certainly getting a lot of blood. More than required.

Dipper struggles up against the hold, but it’s pointless. He ‘s stuck there for a few long minutes, oozing out for an audience that can’t even see half the damn thing, and it hurts. 

The red trail gathers, slowly pooling down and into the engraven triangle. Enough to fill the shallow channels easily, which, uh. Dipper’s never seen before. With the other sacrifices it kind of stopped and clotted, but this moves like it’s being wicked along the surface.

He makes a face as  his blood slowly travels through the lines, but can’t see any surface changes, or feel anything that might have been put on the stone.  

Until it connects at the top point. Then it meets, completing the image of Bill with a strange, too-bubbly ‘blorp’. 

Okay. Weird. But that’s plenty, right? Ritual done, blood offered, and now, he should get going.

Lurching upward gets the grip to loosen up on his arms, as the guards loosen their grip a bit. They already have what they need, and hell. Dippers deserves a friggin’ break. With the immediate attention off him, he can dare a glance at his arm - 

And instantly averts his gaze to absolutely anything else. 

The priest turns around, arms raised. Pumping them  in the air, knife glinting in the candlelight. “Yes. Yes!” He swings the blade around, nearly catching one of the big brothers in the side. “See how easily the liquid flows. The power builds! I can feel it - the summoning, in this room tonight!”

The crowd calls out their enthusiasm, a high rising ‘oooh’ noise. 

Dipper sighs, and tries to scoot back away from the altar. It’s done, at least; he’ll just have to cope with the aftermath. Could be worse.

“The other arm, brothers!” A loud, clarion call. Dipper whips his head around,  as the priest lowers his arms - and turns back around. Pointing at Dipper. Again. “I feel the blade crave more!” 

Uh, hello? What?

Dipper glances up at the knife. At how the slight sheen of blood has dipped into some of the runes, the faint glow -  and goes ‘huh’. 

Alright, he’ll admit. It’s definitely magical. 

But he’s beginning to suspect it has less to do with Bill, and a lot more to do with other forces. Ones that might, say, make a ritual flow smoothly. Or make a fanatical asshole even more bloodthirsty.

Behind him, he almost feels the guards shrug, right before he gets shoved against the altar again. One of the assholes even dares to pat his side, in a brief bit of unexpected sympathy. Not that it means anything. 

Dipper longs to curse them out, to scream at every single one of these absolute jackasses. Every one of them is just watching this happen. Nobody thinks about what happens next, ever, including - 

He grits his teeth instead, hard enough that he thinks something might crack.

Everyone follows orders. The words of their supposed ‘god’, filtered through a man who’s fallible and frail and frankly fucking stupid.  Always getting stupid magical trinkets. Always trying to find a link to that demonic god, constantly pursuing magic, and power, and influence. No matter the cost.

Why would he care if one of the too-few worshipers pays the price?

And fuck that.

Before, Dipper struggled as much as he could. Partly from fear, sure. But mostly to make a point. That this was stupid and painful, and wasn’t going to do anything anyway. Knowing that with enough kicking and protest, he might get them to cut things short.

Now, seeing the priest whip the blade back around, raising overhead with both hands - he fights.

A solid kick lands in the left guard’s groin, and he gets his wounded arm back. Dipper clutches it to his chest, but the other’s still pinned and being twisted, now. Another kick gets something softer, and he hears a huff from the priest. Then a loud, angry order to ‘Hold him down!’.

Dipper’s shoved into the stone, stomach digging into the edge of the altar hard enough to make him gag. His head hits the surface, more dizzying than painful. There's a hand gripped in his hair. Then his other sleeve is drawn up, his healthy arm extended over the table. Bare skin exposed, lying over the bloody surface. 

He breathes heavily, nose nearly against the altar. It quickly grows hot from his breath, and moist, too, which is probably why his face feels wet. He doesn’t hear anything but his own harsh panting. 

He never wanted to be a part of this, he never wanted to grow up like this. In a week or so, he was going to get out, and now he’s going to get hurt again, so soon, and he only has so much blood in him. He doesn’t want to die. He shuts his eyes, tucking up against himself. Hoping the weight of his body will drag his arm away where his own strength couldn’t, choking back a tightness in his throat. He was nearly out. He was nearly safe.

He was almost free. 

He breathes harder, shutting his eyes tight. He presses his forehead against the runes, and the blood, and just wishes he wasn’t here. 

Metal clangs on the floor, ringing bright as a bell. 

There’s a sudden intake of breath. Dipper feels the hands release him, a shocked sound. Then the ‘flump’ of a lot of draped fabric, all at once. 

Dipper keeps his face against the stone, breathing slower. That’s. That’s not how any ritual goes.

He can’t waste the opportunity, though. Now that his arms are free, Dipper pulls his sleeve back up, bundling it around the cut. Shit. Does he clench his fist or leave his grip loose? Which one slows blood flow. 

Whatever interrupted this isn’t going to last. He’s only got a few seconds before everyone comes back to whatever passes for their senses, and tries to ‘complete the summoning’, or whatever the hell they were after.

Gotta act. Gotta - Dipper wheels around, panting for breath. 

In front of the altar, all the robed figures in the room have fallen to their knees. The priest’s dropped the knife. Dipper scoots it a little closer to himself with a foot, watching as the zealot raises his arms in devout praise. 

Dipper pauses. Still clenching tight on his wrist, though his sleeve is starting to feel damp. Things don’t just stop like that. The ritual has to continue. People should be surging up to keep the momentum, but the entire room is -

Oh. 

Yeah, now he sees it. 

All the candles were lit before. They give a little light to a room that’s never seen electronics in its life, dim as it is. 

Right now, they’re bursting with flame, rising high enough to cast weird shadows over the cavern - 

And it’s a very bright blue. 

Shit.

Dipper whirls around, unsteady on his feet. Staring at a long, long trail of rising blood. Almost a string, or a reverse droplet, floating up from the triangle carved on the stone. In midair it spreads into a thin web, shapeless and vaguely pulsing. 

Okay. That is definitely magical. And absolutely up to no good. 

He fumbles around - where did he kick the knife? Maybe if he breaks it, it’ll interrupt this whole thing. Who knows what the hell that idiot priest did, or where he got the artifact, or what it does. 

Dipper doesn’t know much about gods, or spirits, or demons, but anything that gets pulled in by a blood sacrifice can’t be a good sign. He spots the damn thing near the opposite corner, and braces himself on the altar. It he’s careful, he can reach it without alerting anyone. Maybe.

Which is when the entire hall fills with bright, loud laughter.

“Well, well, well, well, well!” The voice rings just as brightly as the laugh. Dipper jerks towards the sound, involuntarily, only to see a single eye open inside the breath web of blood. “What do we have here?”

There’s a resounding groan from the crowd. Various people start chanting, but they’re all using different verses, and the priest starts his own, presumably improvised, wail of praise and devotion. The end result is an ear-rattling clamor. 

Dipper looks back at the altar. Watching the blood twist in this way, and that. The eye alights on him for a moment - he freezes - but it moves on from him quickly, examining the room.

There’s a lot to see, too. Maybe terrified, devout worshipers isn’t weird for a supernatural entity, but it’s thoroughly freaking Dipper out. Even the priest is on his knees.

“Boy, it’s been a while since I’ve had this kinda summon!” The net stretches, almost elastic; twisting into limblike shapes, and fractal forms. The slit-pupiled eye rolls back and forth. Then it blinks twice. “Might as well get dressed for the occasion! Hold on a sec.”

The eye shuts into nothingness. Moments later, the blood starts getting really active, pulsing faster, twisting into shapes like it’s alive.

Dipper spares a terrified check on his wrist, but. No, he’s not feeding it, or anything. This is something else. Someone else, taking the material and lending it power enough to grow. 

Even as he watches, there’s a spreading arch of bone and the twist of veins. A fairly glorpy assortment of something between and below what looks like ribs, a strange thick blackness tinged with yellow…

He cringes back, and shuts his eyes. Shit, watching this is deeply unsettling. 

Not that it’s gory, per se - that would imply that something’s being taken apart, when it shouldn’t be. This is something being put together, a way that it shouldn’t ever be.

He backs up a step from the writhing mass, getting more fleshy by the instant. Then grimaces, teetering in place. Blood loss, right. From the asshole who started this whole thing. He levels a glare at said asshole - 

But. Beside him, the priest is quivering with tension. Trembling like he didn’t expect this to happen.

Frankly? Neither did Dipper. For all the times they’ve done a ritual, there’s never been a reaction like this. 

This insane mass, forming insanely out of nothing. Or well, from blood, that spread out in a weird three-dimensional - triangle, oh shit -

He should have known. Should have noticed. This was a summon, and while the object used wasn’t for the right being, maybe that doesn't’ matter with so much gathered intent. 

This is….

Dipper falls, awkwardly, to his knees. Then ducks down in as low a bow as he can manage, pulling the hood of his robe back over his head.

Part of him thought Bill didn’t exist, or at least not in the way these guys talked about him. Maybe they’d latched onto some other spirit or deity, and completely misinterpreted everything. Maybe they’d made it all up, including some of the really old texts. There was never any evidence that their lord and master was real.  

But given what’s happening here…

Like hell is he gonna look like the only person who doesn’t. 

Something - two things - go ‘clack’ on the altar. A few series of taps. 

Then a long, pleased sigh, and the sound of soft movement, like cloth.

Dipper keeps looking down. The hood keeps him anonymous, another faceless shape in the crowd. Just one more figure genuflecting before his - 

Before a god. 

One that might not even deserve a capital letter on the word, perhaps, but still an entity that he should not, under any circumstances, piss off. 

There’s a tap that sounds like a shoe, and a low hum. Something lands beside him with a thud. In the brief moment that he raises his head, Dipper catches sight of black loafers, and long fingers on an oddly human-looking hand. 

He quickly lowers himself more towards the floor, holding his arm tight. 

Yep, just one more super-devoted believer, same as all the others. Super not important enough to notice.

“You know, blood’s usually for blood gods!” Bill Cipher’s voice rings through the room. It’s higher than Dipper expected it to be. One of the fancy-looking black shoes kicks the knife up into the air, where it’s caught by the long fingers of that hand. “Pretty wild for you guys to pull this. With another guy’s artifact, of all things!” A chiding tut, and the knife twirls. “And pretty disrespectful, I gotta say.”

“My lord.” The priest’s voice is dry, even for a guy who already sounded half-dessicated. He rises to his knees, hands clasped together. “We meant no disrespect. We are here to serve you, master. As we always have.”

“Uh huh,” Bill says. In Dipper’s limited sight, he toys idly with the knife, pressing the tip against the finger of an opposite hand. A bead of something dark wells up, and he rubs his fingers together. 

The priest recites several lines of a chant, making a triangle with his fingers. So eager, and so totally missing the disinterest in Bill’s tone- “We have always been searching for you, our worship unending! You honor us with your presence. You shine upon us your infinite glory!”

“Sure you have,” Bill says, sounding, if anything, bored. The blade in his hand flips around between his fingers, then back again. The motion reminds Dipper of a very deadly fidget spinner. “Do tell.”

Which is when the priest surges up, nearly grabbing onto Bill’s thigh. He’s only stopped by a rapid sidestep. 

Dipper cringes back out of secondhand embarrassment. Bad move. Dumb move. ‘Devoted’ or not, Bill was bored already - and infinite beings of pure energy do not like being manhandled by mortals. 

“Let us use this connection, and the blade! Let us complete the sacrifice.” The priest continues, undeterred. Shuffling closer on his knees, he spreads his arms wide, inviting and eager. “The blood could grant you all your power, that you might grant us-”

“Pass.” Bill says dismissively. The knife flashes, and there’s a wet, solid ‘thunk’. 

Dipper catches a brief glimpse of the priest’s face - stuck in shock, pale and lined with age - just before his body falls to the floor, as limp as a ragdoll. The knife handle in his chest props him up at a weird angle, before a swift kick from a black shoe sends it tumbling down the short three steps of the dais.

Dipper cringes into a smaller ball, trying to scrunch himself into invisibility. He watches Bill pass in front of him, standing in front of the crowd. The hand rests on a hip, while the other is raised out of site. Still far, far too close.

On the one hand, Bill’s examining the congregation. Distracted, for a moment. Staying out of his attention is so, so great. 

Dipper curls up in a much, much tighter ball despite that. 

In every single one of his plans to get out of here, Bill Cipher existing wasn’t a factor. Much less his actual, physical presence. All he’d ever thought about was how this was bullshit, that the people he knew were awful - and how hopefully, nobody would notice if he left. Now the ‘god’ himself is here. Standing so near Dipper he could, if he wanted, stupidly touch the hem of his pants.

A distant, insane part of him chimes in with the stupid idea that it’s nothing to really worry about. 

Like, compared to how he’s still losing blood, for example. 

Right. Staunch first, panic later.

Dipper wraps his sleeve around his arm, as subtly as he can, teeth gritted. His first priority is to stop bleeding. No escape plan - or any plan for that matter - is going to be useful if he dies. 

The immensely powerful nightmare god is also a problem, obviously. But in this moment he’s not the immediate threat. 

“Hmmm.” Bill lets out a low, contemplative hum. It resonates in the room, with how deathly silent things have become. “Let’s see here…”

After a pause, he snaps his fingers. “Stand!” 

The entire congregation leaps to their feet. One of them stumbles and gets a swift kick in the side.

“Sit!” Bill commands. Everyone drops to the floor. A low chuckle, then, “Turn around three times and bark like a dog!”

Oh, now that won’t - 

Or maybe it will. Dipper cringes, back pressed against the altar. Don’t just comply, what the hell. Sure it’s a magical god-being, but - fuck. He watches the scene with a grimace. 

Bill, though, seems to be having a great time. He’s bouncing in place, voice bright with enthusiasm. “Do a little dance! Twist yourself until your joints snap! Hell, start a fight with the guy next to you!”

There’s havoc in the room of ritual. Robed figures practically fall all over themselves, and Dipper notes with a nauseating turn that some of them have drawn knives of their own. Chaos reigns; an entire scramble to do each possible thing, all at once. 

And Bill’s laughter rings out over everything, clapping his hands in delight.

Dipper’s trapped in this room with an insane madman, leading a horde of equally insane idiots, and he doesn’t have a way out. He hopes he’ll stay out of notice. He hopes that he’ll live through the next five minutes.

There’s no controlling the situation, but he can improve his odds.

The altar’s pretty close, and Bill’s turned away, for the moment. Dipper scoots back, inching himself towards the corner. With enough shuffling, he might be able to move behind it and get out of sight. 

“Welp,” Bill claps his hands again, this time with finality. Some of the chaos stills. “You’re all annoying, boring little vermin, but maybe you guys could improve. I noticed the blood you used to summon me was real choice stuff!” The exaggerated sound of a kiss. “Very nice.”

Dipper feels sweat building up in his robes, and tries to be very still. Basically part of the ritual scenery. Anonymous furniture, at best.  

“In fact. It was so nice.” The voice continues, at a lower tone. Almost a purr. There’s a clack of shoes on stone. “Let’s see who this little treat is!”

The god seizes Dipper’s wrist - the wounded one, sending a bolt of pain down his arm - and clamps his palm around it, incredibly tight. 

Before he knows it, Dipper’s standing again, involuntarily, staring past his hood into a bright, glowing eye.

He’s meeting his god. He’s been noticed by Bill Cipher. 

So far he’s not trembling, so. That’s one thing he has going for him. 

Bill’s eye flicks down, then up again, almost thoughtful. Any question about his power is quickly tossed aside, because holy shit; the magic is nearly palpable, thrumming into Dipper’s skin and making his heart race. 

He’s also sporting a bright, wide grin, in a face that makes Dipper do a double-take.

Like. He thought - he glances at the triangle on the back of the wall, then to the person in front of him. 

Okay, it’s said that Bill Cipher can take any form he wants, human included, but, like. What?

Thankfully, Bill doesn’t seem to notice any of the insane, stupid things Dipper is thinking. All he does is raise his hand, and with one quick motion, sweep the hood off of Dipper’s head. 

Dipper flinches back. Jaw clenched, eye shut. 

Shit, shit, shit. Special attention. All the scenarios he can think of say ‘not good’. Best case scenario, it’s because Bill wants to thank him, for... Whatever his blood did. The rest of them involve increasingly terrifying ideas about what ‘nice blood’ means, and how much of it Bill might want. All of it, say. Maybe immediately. 

Dipper can’t pull away, not with such a strong hold on his arm. Fighting is downright dumb. Trembling’s happening, despite his best efforts, and the intrusive thought bubbles up that, hey, at least there’s lots of pressure on his wound. Could be worse.

Nothing happens. For several seconds.

Eventually, Dipper peeks an eye open. 

There’s Bill Cipher, looking back at him. His eye is literally lit up, the pleased grin wide on his face. 

Dipper waits for an order, but the god doesn’t speak. He just wiggles his eyebrows. If anything, he looks oddly… expectant?

Fuck. Dipper has to do something. 

What the hell, there isn’t any doctrine for this.

Sure, he knows all of the catechism, and each chant he was taught. He’s got an encyclopedic memory of everything he was taught about this powerful interdimensional god-being, he knows every ritual back and forth. The tenets spring to mind, unbidden: Be obedient, speak his words, serve him in all ways - and most of all, don’t think. 

But Dipper can’t chant. He hasn’t been told to do anything yet. And though it’d be a death sentence, if serving involves more bleeding he’d be tempted to kick again. Hell, he literally just watched everyone else trying the other bits. They did exactly what they were supposed to, and that was ‘boring’. 

He never could stop thinking, though. 

Now, his mind is racing.

A little-known and never-preached fact about Bill Cipher is that he doesn’t, actually, like rules all that much - 

So. 

Dipper offers a hesitant, closed-mouth smile. He wiggles the fingers of his free hand, a bit awkwardly, in greeting. 

Then ducks his head again, wishing he still had a hood to cover his face.

That didn’t make it weird, right? That’s a normal, devout thing to do. Coming from a totally religious guy, who’s only slightly damp from all the sweating.

“Oh.” Bill’s voice lowers to something like a purr. He tucks a knuckle under Dipper’s chin, lifting him to meet his single eye again. An eye that’s glowing now, bright gold and  half-lidded. “Ten outta ten on the offering, guys. Very cute.” 

Which is a little weird, but probably - 

“Y’know what?” And Bill’s grin widens, bright and wild, as his thumb strokes Dipper’s chin. “I like this one.”

Uh oh.

Dipper tries sinking down into his oversized robes, but Bill just fishes around inside them until he can pull Dipper up again by his undershirt. 

“In fact,” Bill declares, sounding proud. He pulls Dipper in closer, hand still clamped painfully tight on his wounded wrist. “I’m gonna keep him.”

What?

Immediately after that declaration, Dipper’s tugged in close, thumping against his side. Bill turns to start barking orders at the congregation, a sneer in his voice and a 

Dipper can’t quite parse it. He’s still running over the words in his head. 

In the ritual room, the candles flare even higher, temperature rising to an uncomfortable degree. Dipper watches two worshipers collide with each other in their frantic obedience, and can’t even laugh about it.

‘Keep’, Bill said. 

What does that mean? Everything here is already ‘Bill’s’, in a way. But the way he said it sounded… oddly specific. 

A hopeful part of Dipper chimes in that it might just mean ‘not let him bleed out’, but he’s never been that lucky before, and there’s no reason it would start now.

With everything else going on. With the presence of a god. e. 

The cultists are bustling about; a few of them deposit things near Bill’s feet, like gifts upon the altar. Boxes, totems, more lit candles that Bill idly kicks over onto one of their robes, watching them flail at the sudden burst of fire. 

Eventually, Bill considered the task ‘done’, or close enough. He sighs, shaking his head. “About time, guys! Talk about slow. Hard to get good followers these days.”

Bill clicks his tongue in distaste, then snaps his fingers.

Dipper hears a weird ‘zmmm’ sound to his left. He notices that Bill’s suit is really soft material, and also that he probably shouldn’t be grabbing it like this. 

He doesn’t dare look at the sound. Not when Bill’s turned towards him with smug pride, like he’s pulled off a plan without a hitch. 

“Man, it's only been fifteen minutes, and I’ve had it with these losers.” Bill gives the congregation a look of disgust, then turns back to Dipper. That grin reemerges like the sunrise. “Screw these guys, am I right?”

This time, Dipper’s smile is involuntary. He quashes it fast, but not before Bill notices.

“That’s what I thought.” Bill says, with deep pleasure. He takes a step closer to the altar, pulling Dipper along with a surprising lack of force. “So! What’d’ya say we ditch this joint?”

Dipper doesn’t know what that means. He doesn’t know what’s been happening, either, other than it’s all been going way too fast.

But Bill Cipher is looking at him, still. Present, powerful. Eager for a response. 

Dipper just shrugs.

He wouldn’t know what to say even if he still had his tongue. 

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Bill says, eminently pleased. Pulling Dipper in closer, with an arm suddenly around his waist. “Hold on tight! It ain’t a bumpy ride, but it’s a weird one.”

Dipper follows as he walks. Partly on automatic, and partly because what the hell else is he supposed to do?

About three steps in, he realizes they’re both walking on thin air, towards and over the altar. 

He jerks his head over, blinking at the source of that ‘zmm’ sound. 

Because of course summoning am interdimensional god-being would leave a remnant. He had to come from somewhere. 

Like, say, a weird red-yellow gap in space, with nonsense things flung around in a black and bizarre starscape. Dipper catches a glimpse of something with two many limbs, and of a series of screaming mouths with no bodies, and a duck and a grandfather clock, tumbling through the air. 

It’s almost like it might be a nightmare dimension. Who could have thought.

With nothing else to cling to, his free hand clamps Bill’s shoulder, tight. 

“You’re my guest for the next while, sapling.” Bill says, squeezing him tight in return as he steps in - and drags Dipper alongside him, stalking into the portal. “Glad to have you!”

[lola-andheruniverse]

ok, I know by now everyone on the caryl fandom probably watched 11x01 and analyzed the shit out of it because that's what we do 🌟 and we are very good at it

I'm pretty late to the party but I really want to give my two cents as well, mainly because I've seen a few negatives reactions to the episode

soooooo one thing I've learned reading @my-mt-heart blog, our TV genius, is that everything that makes the cut is probably pretty important to the story being told, and that includes costume choices, and background music, and lighting, etc etc..right?

well, I think we all agree that MMB is a beautiful sexy goddess but that's not how Carol was portrayed to be until season 10 when our ZA queen got a glow-up (a new pretty wig, more visible make up, new clothes that fit her body nicely, etc)

that happened because now Carol is not only a main character, but a lead character, with a "possible" romantic connection to the another lead character, Daryl endgame

we can also call it post-divorce glow up if we want ha

so yeah TPTB wants us, the audience, to see Carol as a beautiful woman on purpose so she can fit on the roles above

but 11x01 took it to another level, and you can call me delusional and say that I'm looking at these tidbits of scenes with my caryl googles, but

LOOK AT HER (beautiful gif by @carolsdixxon )

ma'am who gave you permission to look like this? damn

guys, just look at this shot of Carol - how she is positioned, her posture, the way the natural light hits her face, and the fact that her hair is flowing with a little breeze

where is this fucking breeze coming from? I watched this scene a few times and no one else's hair is doing this

did they put a little fan next to MMB's face just to get this effect on the shot?

and here you say lola you crazy, it's not that deep, TWD doesn't do this kind of stuff, they're lazy as fuck

yeah

but the same thing happened at the beginning of the episode, see

(beautiful gif edit by @dixonscarol)

and, again, where is this particular breeze coming?

well, I don't know where the breeze is from, but it made me think

both scenes our beautiful Carol is being observed by no one else than her soulmate, Daryl Dixon

I may be reaching probably am but the timing of both scenes makes me think that Carol looks this ethereal and pretty because we are seeing her through Daryl's eyes and perception

and we know he doesn't know how to approach her right now because of their fight and unresolved feelings, but when she looks like this, it's damn hard no to reach for her, isn't it, Daryl?

and, of course, when we see Daryl by Carol's perspective....

who are you giving this angry and hot 'let's fuck' stare, Mr Dixon?

(another beautiful gif edit by @dixonscarol)

and when Carol doesn't agree with Maggie's suicide mission, he's worried/disapointed/puppy eyes/she's so pretty don't know what to do so I'm leaving, all at the same time

(@dixonscarol giving us all the feelings)

so yeah, maybe it's my caryl colored googles and the outstanding beauty of MMB clouding my judgment but AGAIN no one else looks that hot on the rest of the episode

I think these shots were done with the very intent of portraying Carol as pretty as ever, private breeze and all, just to show us how he sees her and what he will be missing while playing spy with the Reapers

and the whole reference of taking of their armors by Princess, God bless her and her little shipper heart, when we just saw on Diverged that Daryl has a comic book named Man of Armor with a super power couple on the cover because I may die with the foreshadowing