#i cackle and laugh at varying volumes

[dominikadecember]

I FORCED MY LIVEWATCH ONTO MY FRIENDS NOW Y'ALL GET TO ENJOY

Okay, I got pizza, i've got a drink, i've peed, lets start this

omg i knew they chose the perfect alex via taylor cus of his BDE but holy shit dude can do sensitive too and we're just a minute in!!!!!!!!

omg the blank was hilarious in the trailer but it's soooooo much funnier in full speed. I AM CACKLING

their interactions are perrrrrrfect!!!!!

the cake scene, is so uncomforttable. i cant watch this but i need to watch this but OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is the best thing that has happened since sliced bread

you may want to put me on mute bc holy shit i don't know i how ill get through two hours of this mornons

the opening credits are a perfect choice for this movie/book

sarah shahi just keeps getting prettier

uma is the perfect person to be cast as alex's ma and us prezzie

Best line ever 'There is no getting out of this." 'What if I set myself on fire?' 'We'd ship the ashes to Heathrow.' I LOVE ZAHRA!!!!!!!!

DAVID THE DOG IS MENTIONED I HOPE HE IS IN THE MOVIE LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS

ugh loads of london sights, so boring SHAAN IS HOT AS FUCK

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD ENEMY ACT I LOVE IT I CANNOT WAIT FOR THE FREINDS AND THEN THE LOVERS OMG OMG OMGGGGGGG

henry needs all the makeup bc he's a pretty boy but alex is fucking FAAAAAINE

ughhhhh i love this movie so much imma cry

lmfao alex just called queen victoria 'vicky' in an interview and henry looks like he had a stroke

this is so good, the book closet vs movie closet scene is so well done i am so happy

taylor's. fucking. eyelashes. someone made this boy a maybeline ad from birth

AMY THE BODYGUARD DESERVES HER OWN SHOW

OMG THE MOMENT WHERE THEY REALISE THEY MAYBE POSSIBLY ARE NOT ENEMIES BUT JUST MISUNDERSTOOD EACH OTHER I AM SWOOOOOOONING

yaaaas ppl owning their privilege and being honest they may not be perf is mah jammmm

is alex in this movie not supposed to realise he is bi before he hooks up with henry like in the book? bc taylor has chemistry with EEEEEEEERRRRYBODY

omg they're starting to be friendsssssss

THE TURKEY SCENE OMG OMG

I love how they filmed the messaging scenes. So interesting.

alex's political career! i love this plot!!!

Zahra is srsly so fucking pretty

Nora is gorgeous as hell tooooooooo!!!!!!!! Everyone in this movie is absolutely perfect and pretty and i love them

Henry is just a dorky dork with dorkdom

THE CINEMATOGRAPHY IS EXQUISITE!!!!!!

ummm how did alex not get mono at this damn NYE party???

THE KISS THE KISS IS HAPPENING THE KISS OMFG THE KISS OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG I AM OMG!!!!!!

Nora is great but she's like a mix of Nora and June and idk how to feel about it.

OMG ALEX IS DESCRIBING THE KISS AND HOLY SHIT

WOW

Nora and Alex being besties works rllllllly well

lmao alex ignoring an ex for henry was the most obvious thing ever how did no one realise?????

OH MY GOD I CANT THIS MOVIE IS GONNA KILL ME

THE LONGING HOLY SHIT

THE FUN FLIRTY THING IS HAPPENING NOW AND I AM HERE FOR IT

HENRY IS VERY MUCH INTO BEING ORDERED BY ALEX AND I LOVE IT

THIS

IS

VERY

STEAMY

HOLY SHIT

Wow, someone said 'I'm bisexual' and it feels really fucking awesome.

THEY ARE SO CUTE AND HOT

casual hooking up' stage YOU TWO ARE IN LOVE STAHP LYING TO YOURSELVES

OMG OMG OMG MY BRAIN IS MELTING

my cat keeps on walking in and out scared cus i keep shouting OH MY GOD SO SORRY TYMEK ALSO NICHOLAS GALITZINE ON A HORSE IS ABSOLUTELY A FANTASY OF MINE

HOLY SHIT THAT IS GUNNERSBURY PARK THEY FILMED IN GUNNERSBURY PARK AND NO ONE THOUGHT TO TELL ME?! RUDE AS FUCK!!!! I COULD HAVE BEEN THERE AND MADE NICHOLAS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME!!!!

'I think we should make love tonight'

'Um...yeah...I'm down' BOY PLS HOW DID YOU EVER GET LAID?????? 😂😂😂😂😂😂

I can't they are so fucking hot and cute and how is this okay??????????????????????

sorry heteros, no movie will ever have a love scene as beautiful as this movie

oh shittttt an argument between alex and ellen and alex going 'yes madam president' instead of 'yes mom' DAAAAAAAMN

Alex excited about stuff is lovely and Taylor is a very pretty boi

The CGI is pretty crappy but thankfully it doesn't feature way too much.

THEY ARE SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!

THE ZAHRA SCENE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED

OH MY GOD THIS SCENE IS EVERYTTTTTTHING AND IS SO FUNNY OMG OMG OMG OMG

Shit. Alex coming out to his ma scene was beautiful and it hurt and it was perfect.

omg they are all so cute and perfect and cowboyy??? i am 100000000% into the cowboy!!!!!!!! and nicholas' voice, i forgot thhat the boy can sing!

ALEX YOU ARE IN LOVE IT BE OKAY

They changed from the book that alex's parents are together and not divorced and i think it works so well.

THEY ARE DOMESTIC IN THEIR BUBBLE AND CUTE AS FUCK AND TAYLOR IS GLISTENING WITH WATER AND I CANNOT HANDLE THIS

Oh no, this bit, this bit is sad, there is sad angst coming

THE ONLY REASON WHY I AM NOT CRYING AT RN IS BC THE CINEMATOGRAPHY AGAIN IS FUCKING GORG

1 hour and 17 minutes in. First fucking sighting of David the dog. Unbelievable. HE IS THE TRUE STAR OF THIS MOVIE!!!

sad angsty angst ☹️

'what if he won't see me?' OMG MY HEART

aw man, i wish we would have seen the dramatic scene where alex is at the palace gates screaming to be let in like that eric andre meme

there better be thousand deleted scenes

wooooooooah this confrontation is so much more powerful than in my book, these boys are such good actors omg

alex boy you're gonna catch a cold with that wet shirt 🙁 i think most of it is your tears than the rain

THAT BETTER BE ALEX'S BLUE HOODIE!

ugh, so jelly they got to have a museum all to themselves at night no less

also the V&E has never looked that nice whenever i've been there

'just a daft pubescent fantasy' BOY THAT'S HOW I LIVE

OMG THIS IS SO

OMG

'HISTORY HUH?! BET WE COULD MAKE SOME' THEY DID THIS SO FUCKING PERFECT OMG

WHEN DOES THE HAPPY EVER AFTER HAPPEN???? HENRY JUST WANNA KISS HIS BOY IN PUBLIC OMG

DAVID THE DOG IS BACK

Oh right, this fucking thing

The boys being outed by asshats

ofc miguel is involved, fuck off dipshit

Alex is fantastic at politics and I am in love with how fiercly he is protecting his and henry's relationship

ZAHRA IS SO DONE WITH THIS LOVESICK PUPPY SHIT I LOVE HER

ZAHRA IS MY HERO

OH MY GOD

I AM NOT OKAY EITHER HENRY

lmao you gossipy bitches

stephen fry in DA HOUSE!

lmao homophobia in the royal house here plaaaaay!

lmao when the king says 'i have read your emails all of them' alex is tots thinking 'they were hot weren't they' and henry is thinking 'fuckityfuck alex talks about my crack ☹️'

ALEX STANDING UP FOR HIS BOY IN FRONT OF ROYALTY GETS ME EVERYTIME

OMG YAAAAAAAAAS DA PUBLIC LOVES THEIR GAY PRINCE BOI!!!!

lmao philip 'you can't go out there' WHAT YOU GONNA DO? STOP THEM FIT BOYS WITH YOUR PASTY ASS STICK ARMS???

THEY. ARE. SO. CUTE.

you know it's fiction when texas has become a democratic state

THEY ARE SO FUCKING CURE

ARGHH THE CINEMATOGRAPHY IS SOOOOOO PRETTTTTTY

That is absolutely not the house I imagined.

OH NO IT'S OVER 🙁 BUT I LOVED IT SO MUCH OMG OMG OMG IT'S SO GOOD EVERYONE WATCH IT IMMEDIATELY!

lmao there's a bit at the end of the credit with the cake scene and alex going 'do you think anyone noticed?' i love this idiot so much

[fluff-a-nutter]

Tickled Pink

((Ler Eugene & Lee Varian))

“VARIAN YOU ARE SO DONE FOR WHEN I GET YOU!!”

Eugene Fitzerbert stormed through the halls of the castle doing his best to ignore the weird looks and muffled snickers directed at him. Why was he the laughing stock of the palace, you might ask? Well, a certain streaky haired alchemist had taken a prank war too far and added bright pink dye to Eugene’s shampoo. The result was hair that was going to match the color of Varian’s face once he was through with the boy.

Throwing open the doors to the lab, the ex thief stormed in. Varian seemed eerily calm. That was until he saw the color in his mentor’s hair. Choking on giggles, the alchemist grinned as innocently as he could at Eugene.

“Hey, Eugene. Bad hair day?”

Eugene narrowed his eyes at the boy.

“You did this, did you not?”

Varian smirked.

��Yeah, and what are you going to do about it?”

If it had been anyone else, Varian might have thought to be a little more worried, but this was Eugene. They messed with each other all the time. Surely his friend/older brother figure wasn’t too upset. At least, that was what he thought until he saw a familiar, evil gleam in the ex con’s face. That did make him nervous, but at the same time, a giddy, excited thrill jolted through his nervous system.

“Oh, I know exactly what I’m going to do to you, Hairstripe.” Varian let out a nervous giggle.

“O-oh yeah? What?” Eugene smirked at Varian.

“Well, Goggles, I couldn’t be more happy to tell you, in fact I’m just TICKLED pink!” With those final words Eugene pounced pinning Varian down.

“Wahaihaihait! ‘Gene pleaheaheahease! Can’t we talk about this?” Varian pleaded, already giggling up a storm. Eugene shook his head.

“Sorry, kid. It’s too late for that.”

That was the last thing Varian heard before his own laughter. Eugene didn’t waste any time going for the kill, immediately clawing both his hands and vibrating into his tummy.

“OHOHOHOHOHO GOHOHOHODS! ITS SOHOHOHO BAHAHAD!” Varian cackled, kicking his legs frantically trying to gain purchase and escape.

Eugene chuckled,

“Is it? Does it tickle real bad?” Varian felt his face heat up at the sound of that evil word!

“NOHOHOHOHO!! NOHOHOT THAHAHAT WOHOHORD!”

“What word exactly? Tickle? Am I tickling you, Goggles? Am I tickling you real good?” Varian simply responded with a squeal. Eugene chuckled to himself and stopped tickling Varian.

“Thahahat wahahas cruel, Eugene.” Eugene smirked.

“Oho no. I’m not done with you yet.”

Varian was about to ask what exactly Eugene meant before he felt his vest and shirt being rolled up, followed by a loud inhale.

“No! Nonononono! Pleahease! Nohot that ‘Gene! Ahahanything but that!” The alchemist pleaded, but it was futile. Eugene flashed him a grin.

“3…..”

“Nononono!”

“2……”

“Please, Eugene! I’m sorry about your hair!”

“1……”

“Ihihll make a reversal serum! I swear I will!”

“PFFFBBBTHT!!”

Varian tossed his head back and screeched with laughter as Eugene blew raspberry after raspberry on his tummy and belly button.

“GAHAHAHAHAHAHA! STAHSHAHAHAP! I CAHAHAHAN’T STAHAHAND IHIHIHIT!”

Eugene simply grinned and blew more raspberries of varying size and volume, while Varian pounded on his head and shoulders to get him off.

“NOHOHOHOHO MOHORE! PLEAHEAHEHEHEASE!”

The raspberries were bad enough alone, but Eugene was also using his goatee to his advantage, using the scruffy facial hair to add to the tickly sensations, all while spidering his fingers up and down the alchemists sides. And it really tickled! Poor Varian was certain this was his doom.

“Do you promise- PPPBTHT- to make- PPPBTHTH- the serum- PPPBTHT- and change my hair back to normal? PPPBTHT!” Eugene asked blowing raspberries in between every few words to keep Varian shrieking and squirming.

“GYAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YEHEHEHEHEHEHES! YEHEHEHES! JUHUST STAHAHAHAP! IHIHIHIHI CAHAHAN’T BREHEHEHEHATHE!”

Eugene narrowed his eyes playfully and blew one last extra tickly raspberry right on Varian’s navel, making the boy arch his back with a deafening shriek before falling into silent hysterics.

“Alright, deals a deal, Goggles.” The ex thief said, stopping his attack so the boy could breathe.

Varian didn’t respond. Instead he yanked his shirt and vest back down quickly and hugged himself around the middle, letting out a stream of hiccupy giggles.

“Deaheaheal. I’hihill work on it.”

“Good. And if this happens again, well,” Eugene reached over and scribbled gently on Varian’s stomach eliciting a peal of cute giggles.

“Okahahahay! Noted.”

Not even an hour later, Eugene’s hair was back to its normal shade of brown. His skin however-

“DAMNIT VARIAN!! WHY ARE MY HANDS FRICKEN’ BLUE?!”

Let’s just say it didn’t take long for Eugene to have the alchemist sprawled out and shrieking with laughter again.

[ask-kimerako-therapycarpool]

Turbo, I hope you're excited cause now you get to see the violence we Anons are capable of. Also I missed out on doing this earlier. Glad to get a second chance. *summons all the needles and drills and sharp bits right into Mind Shadowys skin, though none to the point of piercing Turbo*

[He's struggling in the OVK Shadowy Venomous clone's grasp, trying to kick him away.]

You better put up a hell of a good fight...!

[He grunts in effort. Since the kicking has no effect, he allows the anon to make their first move of this half of OVK. The clone knows something went into him, but he doesn't feel it. He frowns, and and continues to make an effort to squeeze TKO's head off.]

[The clone's head is forced to face Anon!TKO. He blows him a raspberry before it's snapped back in place.] T̶h̸o̵u̵g̴h̶t̷ ̴I̶'̶d̵ ̶e̵v̵e̴n̵ ̶t̷h̶i̵n̷g̶s̴ ̶o̸u̷t̶,̵ ̴d̸u̴e̴ ̷t̴o̵ ̸t̵h̸e̷ ̵f̸a̷c̴t̵ ̴o̷f̶ ̴t̸w̶o̷ ̶k̷i̵d̴s̷ ̵i̷n̷ ̸m̶y̵ ̵v̸i̴c̷i̷n̵i̸t̶y̷.̵ ̵

[This has zero effect. OVK Shadowy clone sneers,]

A̶n̵d̵ ̶y̶o̴u̸'̷r̴e̸ ̵g̵o̵i̷n̶g̶ ̵b̸a̴c̸k̷ ̵t̶o̸ ̴n̵o̵t̷ ̵i̷n̶t̴e̷r̴f̴e̴r̷i̶n̷g̵.̵

[Before another snarky reply could be made, his legs are chopped off, the parts from it dissipating. He growls with much annoyance, and lifts up the clone about three feet in the air, eyes closed with concentration. Pathetic, he thought to himself.]

–

–

[KO shouts moments after being batted upwards, and then utters a falling yell as he quickly descends back to the ground. He quiets almost immediately reminding himself that he could stop the hard landing, so he catches himself via levitation, just barely inches from hitting the mindscape grounds.]

Phew...!

I dunno how good that'll work out... Maybe you guys can give it a try...!

–

–

[Back at the other side of the battle, still fights to free himself, when he spots the anons preparing for their full-on assault against the OVK made SV clone. He smirks and elbows him hard in the gut, then being released as the clone hisses at him. TKO floats himself several feet apart from him, not wanting to get caught.]

Do your worst, scrubs.

[Both versions of OVK growl as they both receive the hits. But they don't even seem to react to the hits.]

[They both let this happen, tanking heavy hit after heavy hit.]

[A barrage of violent attacks after, the two OVKs are surrounded in pinkish smoke. KO and TKO stand there and watch, waiting with silent anticipation. The smoke then clears out, revealing the results. Mind Shadowy's left half of his torso is taken out, the left leg is nothing but a stub, three holes or varying sizes are left on his chest. As for the actual OVK, he physically appears to be in worse condition than his creation: the bottom portion of his body is absent, the abdomen mouth is all cracked and crumbled, pterodactyl wings are severely tattered, five out of six arms are blown away, and his right eye, including the remaining side of that face, is steaming. All damaged parts of him are steamy, so it's safe to say that he looks nearly decimated. He's visibly shuddering in shock and anger, looking around himself and the clone. KO gasps in surprise of his own and covers his mouth while TKO chuckles at the misery on both their faces.]

Y̴-̴y̶-̶y̷-̸y̷o̴u̵.̶ ̵Y̵o̴o̴u̵u̵.̴.̵.̶.̷

[His amused giggles then grow, continuing to laugh.]

I̵t̷'̶s̶.̷.̶.̴ ̷n̷o̸t̶ ̶f̸u̶n̴n̷y̶.̵.̶.̶.̵.̸

[But it doesn't stop. His head throws back, laughter quickly escalating into full on cackling, increasing in volume. Why is TKO enjoying this so much?]

D̴o̵ ̷y̸o̸u̷ ̶T̴H̶I̶N̸K̴ ̶t̶h̷i̵s̷ ̷i̴s̴ ̷F̸U̶N̷N̶Y̴?̵!̷?̴!̴

[He genuinely does believe so, as he continues guffawing uproariously. It was so hard to stop.]

T̵h̷a̴t̴'̷s̵.̵.̶.̸ ̸t̸h̶a̶t̸'̷s̷ ̴n̴o̴t̷ ̴f̴u̴n̴n̵y̴.̶.̶.̵ ̵a̵t̷ ̴a̷l̷l̶.̷.̴.̶!̴

[His working eye shuts, wincing. Once he lets TKO laugh a minute longer, he slowly blinks it back open, and gives him a look.]

I̵t̷'̶s̵.̵.̶.̴ ̴i̸t̷'̴s̷ ̵r̶e̵a̷l̸l̶y̴.̷.̵.̴ ̸n̵o̷t̷ ̸t̵h̸a̴t̶ ̸f̶u̸n̷n̸y̶.̷.̴.̴ [He smiles, and drops the act, grinning at the two Kincaids.]

Â̵̰ş̴͌ ̵͈̇y̷̛͓o̶͇͊u̶̱̍r̶̯̾ ̶͔̒f̶̺̈ả̶̤c̴̨̓e̶͕͝s̴̙͆.̵̦̕

Huh...?

[TKO's laughing attack starts to ooze with confusion, staring at OVK that should meet the emotion.]

[OVK lets out a single "hah", and follows his retort with every little bit of his virtually destroyed form harshly jutting out back into place, regenerating everything back. And the clone follows suit, also flashing the same look. They flex their formerly eradicated parts, like as if nothing ever happened. TKO's laughing dies completely, and the boys stare in horror.]

[mashep23]

Traffic Jam Session

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Female!Reader

Word Count: +1.5K

Warnings: Nat being ridiculously confident and flirtatious? I think that deserves a warning. This is just pure self-indulgent fluff.

Summary: Stuck in a traffic jam, another commuter requests that you turn your music up

Inspired by this meet-cute prompt:

We are caught in an extreme traffic jam and have been sitting next to each other, parked, for the last five minutes. Your radio is playing my absolute favorite song so I ask you to turn it up. We spend the rest of the slow traffic aggressively singing along to the music at each other.

Prompt list found here

A/N: I tweaked the prompt just a little, hope it's still enjoyable. This was so much fun to write!

Thank you to @river-soul for her incredible beta skills and endless patience 😭❤️ and @whisperlullaby for workshopping with me 💗

Disclaimer: gif not mine

It's a decently warm day, sunny and clear, and the azure blue sky is dotted sparsely with clouds. A breeze blows through the car windows, playing with the feathers on your dreamcatcher hanging from the rearview mirror while you're stuck in traffic. You had been creeping along for the better part of 20 minutes, but you've been at a standstill now for almost five.

Typically one to drive home in silence to decompress, today the stillness and lack of road noise makes you want to turn on some music instead. Since nothing playing on the local stations feels right, you sync your car Bluetooth with your phone and scroll through your music streaming apps. A playlist you made simply entitled "Happy" seems to fit your mood and the gorgeous weather so you press Shuffle All and settle back in your seat.

The soothing, light-hearted Put Your Records On filters through the speakers and you can't help the smile that curves your lips as you close your eyes. Propping your arm on the window, head on your hand, you bask in the sun's warmth. You periodically crack open an eye to check on the car in front of you but there's no change. Everyone on the road has parked and resigned themselves to the long wait.

Your playlist contains a wide variety of genres, cherry-picked songs that unfailingly lift your mood. They're radio hits, usually well-known songs, and easy to sing along with. You happily bop your way through your playlist, getting a little more energetic, singing along to each song.

Walking on Sunshine just finishes and the next song is cueing when you hear a sweet voice ask lowly, "Do you mind turning it up a little?" You grin and twist the volume knob so I'm Gonna Be (500 miles) plays louder before looking to the eavesdropper that's enjoying your tunes.

Holy shit. How did you not notice the car next to you? There is no way they were there the whole time. They're all beautiful. Two men, two women - blondie is driving, two brunettes are in the back seat, and a redhead is in the passenger seat. She was the one that spoke and she grins gratefully, leaning closer, head tilted out the window. You turn it up a little more as she starts singing along.

You grin widely and start singing with her. Her companions in the car laugh and join in good naturedly, cheering as the two of you belt the call-and-answer part of the song.

When the song ends, you're both breathlessly laughing, smiles wide. You turn your stereo volume down even as the next song starts to play and stretch out for a high five. She gives your hand a satisfying slap as she laughs joyfully.

"That was so fun! Thank you so much, I love that song."

"I do too! You're a great partner! And the back-ups were awesome!" You playfully finger-gun point at the driver and backseat passengers. They cheerfully laugh and thank you. You don't remember the last time you smiled this hard.

"I'm glad you didn't mind - I could barely hear it. I had Steve try to get closer but that didn't really help much, so I just decided to ask you." She gives you a sheepish but pleased smile and you return it.

"Oh no I don't mind! I haven't had this much fun in ages!" You can't seem to stop smiling but maybe it's okay because she's smiling at you, too.

"I'm Nat," she says suddenly, and you don't hesitate to tell her your name. She repeats it quietly, still smiling softly at you.

There's a stretch of silence, you're both just looking at each other and one of her friends clear their throat, causing you both to blink. You think maybe you should be embarrassed but she doesn't appear fazed in the slightest.

"In the spirit of introductions, hello beautiful. I'm Sam." The male brunette sitting behind Nat says smoothly after his light cough. "This is Wanda, up there is Steve." He gestures to the woman beside him and to the driver, respectively.

Your gaze never leaves Nat. You can't tear your eyes from her even as Sam speaks, catching the quick tightness around the edges of her mouth before it relaxes again as you smile and respond to her rather than Sam.

"It's nice to meet you," you say sincerely to Nat. Her answering pleased expression as she returns the sentiment warms you. A pleasant tightness fills your chest as her lips quirk at something Sam mutters under his breath. The woman next to him, Wanda, laughs quietly.

"So, you know, we're gonna be here for a while. Let's see what else you got to listen to." Nat grins expectantly at you with a raised brow and you mirror her expression as you turn the knob.

You're pretty sure you've found your soulmate when her eyes spark in delight and she belts along effortlessly to Sweet Caroline, arms spreading dramatically as she almost nails the driver, Steve, in his face with the back of her hand. Sam and Wanda cackle as he shoves her arm away in mock affront and she sticks her tongue out at him.

You can't help but laugh at their antics, watching her perform, directing her friends' involvement ("bah, bah, bahh") before she turns to you ("so good, so good, so good!"). This is quickly becoming one of the best times you've ever had.

The song continues, both of you sharing the lead, absolutely ridiculous and uncaring of the scene you're making. If anyone in the surrounding cars felt disgruntled at the impromptu concert, you'd never know it. The girl in the car next to you has your undivided attention.

You're not sure how long it's been, how many songs you've played and sang along to, but after a while, traffic slowly creeps to life. Steve taps Nat on the arm during a lull between songs and you lower the volume as she turns to him. He gestures at the line of cars ahead, the ones directly in front still unmoving but in the distance you see brake lights releasing, vehicles rolling forward.

She turns back to you, chewing the inside of her lip as she looks at you thoughtfully. She seems to make a decision and reaches her hand out to you.

"Here, let me see your phone real quick." She makes a single gimme motion, fingers flicking closed then open as you hand the device over. Your lips spread into a wide smile at the triumphant look that crosses her face.

She beams at you before dropping her gaze to the phone, fingers moving quickly across the screen. You hear an unfamiliar notification tone and she pulls a phone from her lap, holding it up to show you.

"I text myself from your phone. Now we have each other's numbers. I wanna be able to call you later." She's unabashedly smug as she hands your phone back and you wonder if your face shows just how pleased you are.

You look down at the message thread she left open for you, the unsaved number displayed at the top.

"Traffic Jam Hottie 😍"

The single line of text and emoji sent from your phone to the number makes you bite your lip and shyly cover your smile with your fingertips. You look at her with raised eyebrows and she correctly interprets your unasked question and shrugs.

"That's your contact name. I'll probably never change it, not even after we get married."

It's sly and nonchalant, how she slips that in there, smooth as you please. Your jaw drops and her friends all seem to choke on air but her gaze, locked on you, is unwavering. The flirtatious expression on her face is simultaneously sincere and mischievous as she watches for your reaction.

Butterflies erupt in your stomach, your chest feels tight and pleasantly warm. Your smile stretches so wide your cheeks hurt as she winks and you're so giddy, you don't care how eager you look in this moment.

You quickly save her contact information and smirk, wiggling your phone at her.

"I'd hope not. I think having matching contact info is pretty cute and kinda romantic. A fun story for the wedding toasts." You grin cheekily.

Her expression shifts, full of mischief, a quirk of her eyebrow that makes your breath hitch and sets your heart racing as her friends whoop with glee at your banter. Her lips spread in a sly smile and you can't help but return it. You're positive you've never smiled this much in your life.

Too soon, the gridlock lets up and you both start moving with traffic. The cars in front of you begin to roll, the lane speeds varying enough to cause you to separate. She's still grinning at you as they get further ahead. You can faintly hear their teasing and you catch a glimpse of her profile, smiling and laughing, before she's no longer visible.

They take an exit as you continue on and you barely have a moment to mourn that they're out of view before your phone vibrates in your lap. Picking it up, you grin madly at the screen, the contact "Traffic Jam Hottie 😍" scrolling across the top.

Accepting the call, you hear it connect through you car speakers, her friends still audible in the background. Your heart stutters when she purrs her greeting.

"Hey hottie."

-----------------------

Tagging some of my amazing discord family: @buckyownsmylife @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog

[milkyplier]

I was watching My Hero Academia and there was scene that made me laugh but instead of a regular laugh it was this deep villain cackle and then I spent the next minute wheezing and cackling at myself in varying forms and volumes

[baticorngirl]

Title: In Mother’s Arms

Fandom: Batman

Characters: Damian Wayne, Talia Al Ghul, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Dick Grayson, Ra’s Al Ghul (Hallucinated), Tim Drake,

Relationships: Talia al Ghul & Damian Wayne, Bruce Wayne & Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson & Damian Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth & Damian Wayne, Batfamily Members & Damian Wayne, (Minor) Talia al Ghul/ Bruce Wayne, Titus & Damian Wayne, Damian Wayne & Original Dog Character

Summary: Damian Wayne had went through so much effort to finally go on patrol by himself. But once he achieves this, it almost immediately backfires. With Scarecrow standing in front of him in victory, and all his fears coming to life, how will he get out of this mess? Who could manage to save the scared little boy now?

A/N: So... a while back, I was looking for Damian Wayne Fear Toxin fics, but unfortunately, none of them had any Good Parent Talia. So yeah, this is my self-indulgent fic to make up for it. And fittingly enough, it's also Mother's Day!

Fair Warning that there's panic attacks and hallucinations in this fic, so if you're sensitive to that stuff, please don't read it.

Also, I'd like to thank @mac-attack5 for helping me flesh out the details of the plot.

Click HERE to read it on Ao3

Click HERE to read it on FF.Net

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Damian felt a drop of sweat roll down his face. He tugged his cloak around himself, the night suddenly feeling so much colder. The boy's breath was stuttery and shaky. His heartbeat loudly thumped in his ears. Dropping on to his knees, the poor child watched as his vision became blurry with tears.

He wasn't sure why he felt the undying need to never listen to his family when they told him these things were too dangerous. All he knew was that he certainly wouldn't be out here, fearful and cold, if it weren't for it.

Just earlier that day, he had been so very happy. Rain had been pouring outside, and clouds had swarmed the sky, but the gloom had not ruined Damian's mood. In his arms, lay a soft, playful, little puppy with golden fur named Warrior. Damian had adopted the puppy fairly recently, and he had already fallen in love with him. Everyday since his adoption, Damian always found something new about the puppy that was just absolutely amazing in his eyes. That specific day, it had been his speed.

"I timed him, Grayson. He could run 25 miles per hour!" Damian had informed his elder brother, with a proud smile on his face. Dick reached down and ruffled his hair, smiling back. Nighwing turned his attention towards the puppy that sat next to Damian.

"Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?" He sat down near the puppy and petted it. The dog woofed and jumped closer to Dick. Damian joined the two of them on the ground, getting out treats for the puppy.

"He is!" Damian tossed the treats next to the puppy. "And no matter what happens, he always will be." He wrapped his arm around the dog, pouting stubbornly to prove that nothing would take him away from his new pet.

Even that pout, though, had been a happy, loving, one. And in addition, his joy seemed to only continue. Damian had felt incredibly confident that afternoon. He carried himself with his head up even higher than usually, and he had a stern, strong look on his face. So just like any other time the boy felt incredibly confident, he would argue with his father over everything.

"I am undoubtedly strong enough to go on my own." Damian insisted, looking up at Bruce adamantly. His arms were tightly crossed over his chest. "You are just being paranoid, Father."

"You're ten years old. If you want, you can partner up with Dick, but you're too young to be without a partner." Bruce responded, his mouth resting in an apathetic frown. He glared down at the boy to make it clear that debating wasn't going to change his mind. "Come on, Damian. Are you coming, or not?"

Damian picked up his mask and adjusted it on his face, "I'm ready, but I refuse to go if you're going to treat me like an infant." He pivoted around to face a wall. Bruce sighed, putting a hand on Damian's shoulder.

"Fine, Damian, fine… Stay home, then." He began to turn around, walking over to the batmobile. He jumped, springing himself into the driver's seat. Turning back towards Damian for one more moment, Bruce sighed again. "Just... be good for Alfred while your siblings and I are gone."

Whoosh! The batmobile and the other batkid's motorcycles began to speed off, leaving Damian and Alfred alone together. They turned to look at each other for a moment, but looked away again just as quickly.

"Very well then, Master Damian. I'll go upstairs, and you may join me if you please." Alfred spun around and began to march into the elevator. Damian watched silently, not daring to move until Alfred was completely gone.

The minute Alfred had fully exited, he raced towards the exit. He jumped on to his motorcycle, and immediately turned it on. It sputtered out a loud, attention-grabbing vroom, but fortunately, Damian was able to turn up the speed before Alfred came back down.

Whoosh! Alfred came down just quick enough to see a blur zooming out. "Master Damian…?" He called, a worried tone in his voice. He ran over to the batcomputer, quickly turning on the communicator. "Master Bruce, it seems Master Damian has… left."

"Left?" Bruce repeated. The communicator went silent as he processed this information. For the third time that night, he sighed. As thoughts spun in his head, Bruce quickly made a realization. "Damian, do you have your communicator with you?"

Meanwhile, Damian had just jumped off his bike. His boots aimlessly kicked the pebbles in front of him. Suddenly, though, Damian felt a buzz near his waist. His eyes widened abruptly. Sound… or more, his father's voice... was crackling out of it. Panic ran through his head, but he picked up the communicator anyway.

"Damian? Hello? If you respond, I might allow you to continue." Bruce persisted with fishing for Damian's response. Tempted by the thought of being permitted to continue, Damian slowly pressed to unmute himself.

He pulled the communicator up to his mouth. "Father…?" He muttered into it. On a rooftop somewhere else in the city, Bruce snapped back to attention. "I have responded. May I now proceed?" Damian continued.

For the fourth time that day, Bruce sighed. "Fine... but tell the rest of us if you need anything." Him and Damian both muted themselves. Damian smirked, making a small cheering gesture with his arms. Pulling out his grappling hook, he latched it on to a nearby roof. His eyes widened as he stared down at the sparkling lights of the city in awe.

But not everything could go his way. Nearby, Damian heard a soft cackle. It was soft like a whisper, yet clear and coherent. Turning around, he felt his boots clacking underneath him as he ran towards the sound, sword in hand. The maniacal laugh happened again, followed by talking, which unfortunately was too far away to be audible.

"Freeze, criminal peasants!" Damian burst into the door to the building he'd heard the suspicious sounds from, kicking it down with as much force as a 10-year-old could manage. Inside, a criminal and his henchmen were working together to rob the building. The criminal had an eerie mask over his face that looked almost like a light green sack, except with holes for his eyes and mouth. Ropes held the odd fabrics to the villain's face, crossing over his mouth as if they were teeth. On top of his head lay an old, stitch-covered hat, similar to one a witch might wear. Scarecrow, Damian thought.

He ran over to the criminal, swinging his sword nearby. But just as Damian was about to hit Scarecrow, gas swarmed the air. The boy clenched at his throat and nose, instinctively dropping his sword as he did so. The muscles in his limbs tightened, the gas seeping into his body. Damian reached for his gas mask, only to have a wave of nausea stop him before it was too late.

Damian unmuted his communicator "I may… need… just a little bit… of backup." The world flickered in front of his eyes, forcing him to drop his communicator out of confusion. In the distance, he saw the dark, shadowy, figure of a man coming towards him.

"Good luck with that..." He heard Scarecrow whisper, the last bits of reality starting to fade out. In front of him, the only thing he could seem to see (or at least focus on) was the man. As the figure came closer, Damian could see he was wearing an iconic green cape with golden trimmings. Once his face began to show itself, it became obvious who it was. His hair stuck up a bit, the top of it being black, and the side being more of a white or light grey color. Thin beard hair creeped out from the sides of his chin.

"Grandfather?" Damian mumbled. The man nodded, an aggressive frown on his face. Damian reached for his sword again. "What are you doing here? What are you planning?" Ra's seemed content with the idea of just standing there silently, but after a moment, he finally opened his mouth to answer.

"I'm not planning anything, my grandson… my traitorous grandson." Ra's responded, his voice varying in volume as he spoke. Some words were spoken eerily softly, while others boomed into Damian's ears, sounding as startling as hearing a toilet flush in an otherwise silent night. "Plans are for the future. My past, even just my immediate past, holds much more value event-wise."

"What do…. What do you mean?" The boy stuttered, slowly pulling his sword a little higher in front of himself. The sword's smooth yet pointy blade perfectly covered Ra's, hiding him from Damian's vision. But just as he felt a small ting of relief from the illusion of security it gave him, it seemed to become translucent. Damian's eyebrow rose, puzzled at why he could still see Ra's despite the sword seemingly blocking his vision.

Ra's took a step closer. The sudden movement made Damian look up from the sword in surprise. He stared up at Ra's, glaring in anger. Ra's simply smiled menacingly and began to explain. "I have hundreds of assassins, Damian… You know that. It's about time I used my abundance of them to do something productive. So with the family of detectives split into groups out for patrol, I could easily assign a few assassins to deal with each. You don't think I, The Head of the Demon, would've missed such an extraordinary opportunity, do you?"

Damian stumbled backwards fearfully. He looked down at the ground, attempting to deny what he knew Ra's was saying. "You k-" He swallowed back tears. "They're d-"

"Yes, Damian," Ra's made a small motion to Ubu, who ran back to get something. Ubu came back with other assassins, all carrying corpses… corpses of Damian's family. "See for yourself."

Meanwhile, on the other side of the still-unmuted communicator, Bruce was yelling out questions. "Damian? I thought I heard the scarecrow in the background. Is everything alright? Did he intoxicate you? Damian! I can't hear you. Can you hear me?" He kicked a crook's head to the ground before quickly looking at Damian's location. It was way across the city from him. Quickly, Bruce jumped into the batmobile and began his long drive over.

"He got gassed, didn't he?" Tim questioned over the communicators.

"That's what I'm worried about… and from what we could hear, it seems likely." Bruce confirmed, looking down only for a moment before focusing back on driving. He pressed his foot firmly on the pedals, but no matter how fast he went, he knew it would take far too long to get to Damian.

Back on the other side of Gotham, Damian stared at the dead bodies in front of him. Every single one looked pale, not a single bit of life on their faces. He wanted to be with someone, hear a loved one's voice, but every single one of his loved one's in front of him. It was obvious he would never hear their voices again.

Just to be sure, he began to count under his breath, "Father, Grayson…" Everyone in the batfamily was certainly there. But it wasn't just them. "Goliath? Warrior… Mother?" He gritted his teeth even harder. That monster had really gone out of his way to kill every single person Damian cared a smidge about.

Damian turned back towards Ra's, about to make him pay for this, but his eyes glanced back towards his family just won more time. Suddenly, his teeth felt too weak to grit. Everything he loved about every single member of his family seemed to flash through his mind, making him dizzy. They were gone.

Cold sweat rolled down Damian's forehead. His legs felt like sticks as he stumbled on to the ground. The boy attempted to breath, but he stuttered and coughed instead. His head leaned down as he curled up in his cloak, tears streaming down his face. The only noise coming out was soft, miserable, sobs.

"I've taught you better than to be this weak." Ra's stated, frowning at the ball-shaped boy that was in front of him. "Didn't you know this was going to happen? What else did you expect after such a betrayal as your own? I couldn't just allow you to get away with it. Making your life miserable was just what you deserved."

Damian covered his ears, thinking back to the impossibly translucent sword. "This is all just an illusion…" He mumbled. "Just an illusion… Just an illusion…" He attempted to console himself, but felt his breath become even more shaky every time he spoke.

Slowly, though, he got up the courage to uncurl a little. Still moving at a slow speed, he began to turn his head back towards Ra's and the corpse.

"Noooo!" At the sight of his family's dead bodies, he immediately curled back up. Ra's sighed, turning away from Damian in disappointment.

Not far away, Talia had been jumping from rooftop to rooftop, looking for Wayne Manor. After getting a break from her assassins duties, she had immediately decided she wanted to visit Gotham to see her son. Damian's screams startled her, making her immediately head in his direction.

"Damian?" She asked, a worried tone in her voice. After only a moment, she burst into the building. Inside, her eyes darted right towards Scarecrow, who was smiling wickedly at a terrified Damian. She ran over to Scarecrow, throwing him on to the ground with all her might. "STAY. AWAY. FROM. MY. SON!" She shoved her foot up against his face, squishing him on to the floor.

With his head still crammed downwards, she took out her sword and put it up to his neck. "Forget what I just said… I don't think I should even let you have the choice." She carefully moved it even closer to his neck than before, hearing muffled yelps from him in response.

"Pleeeease… don't… hurt… me." Scarecrow managed to gasp out from the awkward position. Now even closer to the neck, she began to put it through. But just as she was doing this, she turned towards Damian. He was still curled up near a corner, sobbing. Knowing Scarecrow was already too scared to harm Damian any more, she ran over to her child.

"Grand… father… I'm sorry." Damian mumbled in between sobs. "I'm.. sorry." His head was curled downwards, not daring to even look up to see whoever had come over to him. Even from a couple feet away, Talia could hear his shaky breath. Even his loud heartbeat was slightly audible. Her mouth partially dropped, her heart breaking at the poor, small, child in front of her.

"Damian…" Slowly, as if to not startle him, she wrapped her arms around him. She carefully weaved them through his cape until they were all the way around. Feeling the warmth of her, Damian leaned closer to her. He hiccuped as he did, tears still rolling down his face.

She gently nudged him to lean on her shoulder, "It's going to be okay… no one can hurt you." Talia moved her hand on to his cheek, gently turning his head to face her. A soft, solemn, smile was now on her face. "I won't let them." Damian looked up to her, still visibly miserable, but at least happy for her comfort.

As soon as she let go, he wilted back down onto her shoulder, cuddling into her arms. She squeezed him tight, the soft smile fading to just a look of concern. Talia bent an elbow to massage and ruffle his hair relaxingly.

"But- but I'm not the one he's going to hurt." Damian whispered fearfully. He attempted to get out from her hugs, not wanting to be seen as weak. "Grandfather's going to hurt Father… and you. And everyone. There's nothing you can do."

"I'm… I'm really sorry, Damian." She whispered back, looking down at him sorrowfully. "Your grandfather is in the past, though. Or at least your time with him. Now that he's away from him, I'll make sure he stays away from you… and the rest of your family. But if it's me you're worried about, just know that he wouldn't dare actually kill me.. And I'd like to believe he wouldn't kill you, either." She turned around slightly and kissed Damian on the forehead.

Damian hiccuped again. Tears rolled down his face even faster than before. Still shaking, he buried his face into her shoulder. Talia rubbed his back, slowly trying to calm the boy down. After a few moments, he began to calm down and sob a little less.

Sighing, Talia wrapped her arms back around Damian firmly. She scooped him up off the ground like you might hold a toddler. His head continued to lean on her shoulder, but now, his body was farther in front of her than before, with her arms carrying it.

Talia continued to rub his back as well as she could, while carrying him outside the building. She pushed his cape around him tighter as a breeze trickled through. Beginning to close his eyes, Damia felt his consciousness drift away. His mother carefully dropped him down onto the ground again once they were outside.

Damian shook himself back to consciousness, "Mother, I'm too old to be carried." He complained, but there was a hint of exhaustion in his voice. It was obvious that after the emotionally-draining hallucinations he just experienced, he wasn't really going to get into a full-on argument.

Talia ignored his complaints, "Are you still seeing the hallucinations?" She asked him worriedly. Damian then realized that his eyes were still partly squinting, so he opened them farther. In front of him, he could still see a blurry vision of Ra's.. and some of the corpses, too. And faintly, he was still sure he could hear his grandfather whisper something menacing.

"A little.. But I… I can handle them." He shook his head again to try to get them to get away. Unfortunately, they only seemed to grow more vivid. Damian's heartbeat thumped, and he momentarily forgot to breath as Ra's started taunting him again.

"Now it's only a matter of time before you make new allies... certainly not ones my army can't defeat, though." Ra's stated matter-of-factorily. Damian made a small yelp, making Talia instinctively wrap her arms back around him.

"I don't think you can…" Talia mumbled, "I'll call up a-" Just as she was about to speak, a car zoomed by. It was mostly black, but with small yellow tints in some places. From inside, a dark figure popped out. She moved herself in front of Damian, but immediately smiled when she was the person's face. "Beloved!"

"Talia?" Bruce's eyes widened at the sight of her.

"You don't happen to have the fear toxin antidote on you, do you?" She asked, getting straight to the point. Talia scouched her son closer to Batman so he could see him better. "Damian got gassed, and he's not doing very well." She laid Damian onto her lap.

"Considering Scarecrow's such a common villain, I always do." Bruce slid down to a kneeling stance. Talia shifted Damian and herself to face Bruce, positioning Damian's arm higher so it was easy to inject into. He pulled out the antidote as quick as he could, and pushed it straight into Damian's arm.

Talia and Bruce both held each of Damian's hands, leading the sleepy boy over to the batmobile. She strapped him in just before Bruce began to drive off. As they rode, Damian's head gently bounced with the car's movements, rocking him to sleep.

When Damian woke up, he was back at the manor, curled up in bed. His mother, father, and siblings (plus Alfred) were all huddled around his bed. He yawned, suddenly turning to see the dogs beside him. Titus and Warrior both reached in to nuzzle Damian. Warrior, being the younger one, playfully bounced on to Damian's lap, meanwhile Titus simply stood at his side, and gave him a soft lick on the cheek.

"You're awake," Everyone responded, not at all in unison. Some said it fast and excitedly, while others said it slow and disappointedly. Either way, Damian was sure that every single person there said it, even if it was in their own odd way. He watched as Alfred set down some cookies and milk in front of him as a comforting treat.

Overwhelmed by the sound, Damian pulled the blankets up over his face. But as the dogs continued to lick at their owner, the blanket didn't stay up for long. Damian sighed, wrapping his arms around the dogs to nudge them under the covers with him. They quickly went under, making Damian hold back smiling from all the warmth it gave him.

"Let's just let him rest…" Talia suggested, standing up. She quickly motioned for the rest to leave the room. They slowly began to do what they were told. Bruce stayed to ruffle Damian's hair, but followed the rest immediately after.

Looking to his side, Damian sighed. Even as they left, he could still hear their rustling. As annoying as they were, they weren't going anywhere any time soon. Yes, his humongous family would stay by his side for a long while… and there was nothing even Ra's could do about it.

[kasey-writes-stuff]

It’s not much but here’s part two! It’s basically the after math of the dinner and shopping trip!

You, Sam,Sapnap,Dream and George had just gotten back from a nice little dinner and shopping trip! Things were great everything went great you all even met a few really nice fans at the mall and it was just a really nice time with your friends! While at dinner though Sam happened to say some information that caused the situation you’re in right now.... what’s the situation you ask? Well ehe I’ll let it speak for itself...

“DREHHEHAHAHAMMM NOHOHOTTT THHEEEEE SAPNAP NO!” Dream and sap giggled happily they were wrecking you “Awe what’s the matter y/n can’t take a few little tickle tickle tickles?” Dream grinned smugly as sap did as well “yea are they too much for you y/n? Hmmm are you just too ticklish?” Your face was already very red but it turned even redder with the teases “SSSHUHUHUTTT UHUHUPPP” Sap scoffed “Well! That wasn’t very nice was it Dream!?” Dream shook his head tsking ���no it wasn’t nice at all, I think that’s deserving of a punishment” sap nodded “yes yes it is” he smirks as he pushes your shirt up to just shove your belly button and Dream smirks as he leans towards your neck before Sam speaks up

“Uh Dream hate to break it to ya but that won’t work” Dream stops and raises his head to look at Sam “what” Sam looks at him “It won’t work their neck isn’t ticklish” Dream scoffs “no way literally everyone has a ticklish neck” Sam shrugs “okay sap don’t do anything just let Dream try” sap shrugs and gestures for Dream to go on, Dream leans his head down and blows the biggest raspberry he can mange... you as ,Sam knew, didn’t react... Dream blinks and starts blowing more smaller ones but gives up after a few and switches to wiggling and scratching and then shakes his head in disbelief “no way no freaking way” Sam laughs softly “I told you so dude”

Sap smirks softly “What about raspberries here though do you think they’d work here?” Sam grins smugly “Oh I don’t just think they would work there I know they would work there” Sap claps excitedly “alright then let’s go!” He leans down and leaves the biggest raspberry he can manage right on your belly button! You shriek and fall into loud cackles legs kicking out behind you uselessly, Dream and George laugh in slight surprise at your volume and everyone jumps slightly as you scream before falling into silent laughter

“AAAAAAAHHHHHHH................................” Sap kept blowing varying raspberries all over your stomach and sides while also nibbling softly and on top of all of that? He began squeezing your hips! His thumbs slowly beginning to dig in gentle circles! He only kept this up for a few more seconds before stopping to be sure you wouldn’t actually die haha, you lay their slowly curling up as you catch your breathe... Dream cautiously and slowly runs his hand through your hair “Are you okay y/n?” You attempt to take a few breathes to help stop the giggles but it’s no use the tingly feelings still there, you giggle as you nod your head “ihihihimmm ggohohohoddd”

Sap smiled smugly “good to know I didn’t fully kill you nerd I’d hate to have a murder charge be the end of my career” you rolled your eyes softly as you finally felt the tingles stop, you sit up and lightly glare at him “oh sap I’m sorry to break it to you but your career is definitely ending in murder” he stared at you curiously, you smirked as you tackled him “It’s gonna end in your murder!”

And so with that it was sweet sweet revenge time!

The end

[olivia-ivy]

what were Remus and Virgil doing during the last episode?

AO3 | Ko-Fi

Virgil was sitting in the center of his room. Not his bed (or the couch, rather, as Thomas was standing in his living room), that was too bouncy, moved too easily, wasn’t stable enough. Not good for his plan of curling into a ball and not moving until the world ends, and maybe not even then.

He was exhausted from the wedding. All those people, all that social interaction ... okay, sure, there wasn’t a lot of social interaction (almost none from the bride and groom, in fact) considering Thomas just sat on his phone the whole time, but still! There were a lot of people there and Virgil didn’t like it. Of course there would have been less people at the callback ...

And that thought only made Virgil sink further into his anxiety-ball form, hugging his knees closer and tucking his head in further. He couldn’t remember if he started rocking in place before or after he started crying, but that’s where he was when he heard a soft pop and smelled Axe body spray — and lots of it.

“SO,” Remus said settling next to Virgil’s huddled form, his extravagant outfit rustling loudly, “it turns out all the video games they’re gonna reference are rated E for Everyone. Lame.” 

Virgil squeezed his eyes shut, more tears leaking out. He bit his lip to keep his whimpers in and willed himself to stop shaking, which didn’t do a whole lot. Remus was quiet, which is never a good sign (but neither is him not being quiet so who really knows).

“... Is it a Bad Day?” Remus asked, a touch softer than his regular volume, and Virgil’s heart seized. Back before Thomas was aware of any of them, the Others would help Virgil on his Bad Days. It usually had varying degrees of success, but it was better than nothing. He hadn’t told any of the Light Sides about it. He didn’t want it to get back to Thomas that he used to be on the other side of things — of course that ship officially sailed. And sunk. Worse than the Titanic. “Is it a no talky day?” Remus continued.

Virgil didn’t move for a long time. They had a whole system worked out before Virgil left, before Janus kicked him out, before the Others figured out something was wrong with Virgil Before. For days when he didn’t want to talk, didn’t want anyone around him. He still remembers all of those signals. He knows that if he just holds up a closed fist, Remus leave him alone.

He slowly releases one hand’s grip on his legs (ow his fingers are stiff. How long has he been in that position?) and raised one finger. Their old signal for yes. 

Remus hummed. “Well that works for me. I have an idea for a nightmare I’m working on, so I’m gonna use you as a soundboard. So it starts with Thomas falling into an abyss, usual stuff right? But then he lands in the middle of that horror movie he saw when he was twelve that scarred him for life, you remember that? Of course you do, you’re the one in charge of the Deep-Seated Issue part of the brain.”

And on and on Remus continued, talking about first his nightmare idea then whatever random thought drifted into his brain. Even though the content of his rambling was often violent, disturbing, or both, just having another voice in the room to listen to, to drown out the static in Virgil’s brain and the loud voices coming from upstairs (it sounded like Roman, Patton, and Thomas were fighting) was helping.

At one point, there was a soft pop and the room smelled faintly like a nail salon. Virgil turned his head, still huddled in his Virgil-ball, and saw various nail polishes spread out before Remus. He had acrylic nails on (did he have those when he came in?) and had a bottle of nail polish remover at his lips. “Y’know, the liquid is blue, but it tastes green.” Remus said matter-of-factly.

“Dirt tastes red.” Remus had said once when they were younger when things were easier.

Virgil frowned. “But you said Janus’s pancakes taste red. Do his pancakes taste like dirt?”

“No, that’s a different red,” Remus said like that made all the sense in the world.

“Okay, but what does red taste like?” Virgil asked, still thoroughly confused by the conversation taking place.

“Like pancakes and dirt!” Remus cackled.

Present-day Remus shrugged, took another swig, and screwed the cap back on the bottle of nail polish remover. He picked up a bottle of black nail polish and beat it against the palm of his hand. “Gimme your hand,” Remus said, but made no move to grab it. Virgil mentally checked himself on how he was feeling about touch. Twenty minutes ago, it would have been a hard no. Now, however, he limply offered his left hand to the other Side and reburied his head in the Virgil-ball. 

He felt the cold varnish spread over his fingernails. He was vaguely concerned over what Remus was going to put on his nails, but he knew Remus was too proud of his creations to make a mess (unintentionally, that is. Intentional messes were still a possibility). Plus his nails were always chewed down to the quick, so there wasn’t exactly a large canvas for him to work with.

Remus was just finishing his other hand (“Don’t immediately put it back in the Virgil-ball,” Remus lightly threatened when he finished the first hand and placed it on the carpet next to him. “No smudging my masterpiece.”) when they heard it. Deceit’s tune, coming from upstairs, sounding like it had some kind of retro game filter over it. Virgil tensed (but didn’t move his hands) and Remus snapped his fingers and turned on the TV. The music came through the speakers, louder and more clear. Remus was quiet for a moment (again, not a great sign) then muttered, “Did I drink too much nail polish remover, or is Youth Pastor Ryan a giant frog?”

Virgil peaked over his knees at the TV screen and ... no, Remus didn’t drink too much nail polish remover (well, no, he had, any amount of nail polish remover is too much to drink, but Patton was a giant frog). The others were all pixelated and looked to be standing in a broken version of Thomas’s living room. Patton and Roman were on one side, and Thomas and Janus were on the other, Janus standing protectively in front of Thomas. Virgil’s breath caught in his throat.

“Janus please, don’t do this,” Virgil pleaded. “I’m only trying to protect Thomas —”

“So am I,” Janus said, his voice frustratingly cold and collected. He was standing at the threshold between the two sides of the mindscape, holding the door open and “encouraging” Virgil to go through it.

“I can’t go over there, I’m not one of Them!”

“But you’re not exactly one of Us either, are you?” Janus said, his mismatched eyes narrowing in accusation.

Virgil laughed once, incredulous. “All this because my name is different from you guys?” He thought it was just an innocent observation Janus made. When his insomnia sentenced him to another sleepless night and he threw on his gray hoodie before heading downstairs for a two AM cup of coffee, when he got down to the kitchen and saw Janus sitting at the table looking pensive about something, when he started talking to Janus as just a thing to do, when the conversation shifted from friendly chatting to an interrogation, he had no idea it would end like this. With the man he once thought of as family kicking him out in the middle of the night.

“It’s more than that and you know it!” Janus yelled, his control slipping just slightly. He caught himself and lowered his voice (though he didn’t have to. Remus snored louder than anything and the other one’s room was the furthest from the threshold) and repeated, slowly, “It’s more than that, and you know it, Virgil.” Something like sadness flickered across his face, briefly. “Don’t make this any harder than it has to be,” he murmured.

Rage boiled in Virgil’s gut, and he exploded. “It doesn’t have to be this way! You’re the one doing this! What happened to ‘family’, huh? What happened to ‘it’s us against the world, now’?” Virgil’s voice caught in his throat and his vision blurred. “Or were those all lies, Deceit?”

Janus’s eyes hardened. He opened the door wider. 

Virgil scoffed. “Whatever,” he muttered. “Whatever.” He stomped across the threshold, jostling Janus on the way even though there was plenty of room to avoid him. He blinked harshly. That side of the mindscape was always brighter, even in the middle of the night. That’s why Virgil’s eyes watered and leaked down his cheeks, no other reason, just that.

He glared over his shoulder one last time at Janus. Was that regret in his eyes? Remorse? Whatever it may or may not have been, no words were spoken between the two as Janus closed the door, and locked it once again.

“Look, look!” Remus said, bumping against Virgil, bringing his attention back to the present. On the TV, everyone was un-pixelated and back in Thomas’s in tact living room. Deceit took off one of his gloves, and held his bare hand up flat, like a witness swearing in to testify in court.

“My name is Janus,” he said. Virgil and Remus looked at each other wide eyed. It was Janus’s idea to keep their names hidden from the others in the first place (hence why Remus blurted his out right away. Someone tells him not to do something and that’s the first thing he does).

Their shock was interrupted by the sound of Roman snorting. Virgil winced, reminded of when he revealed his own name and Roman (badly) stifling laughter at his expense. “Janice?” the prince said incredulously, laughing behind his hand. “What are you, a middle school librarian?” Remus snorted at that joke but otherwise kept quiet. Roman laughed some more then reasserted, “It’s a stupid name.”

Janus huffed in exasperation. “Oh, Roman, thank God, you don’t have a mustache,” he simpered, “otherwise, between you and Remus, I wouldn’t know who the evil twin is!”

A bottle of nail polish remover flew threw the air and crashed into the TV, breaking the screen and stopping the scene unfolding in front of them. Any other time, Virgil would have freaked out at such a display of violence, but he was too busy staring at Remus, now standing and breathing heavily. 

Virgil knew why. Way back Before, the four of them had sat down and made a list of things never to call each other, not even in a fight. Virgil’s list was the longest. Remus’s was the shortest. It only had one thing on it, one thing that Remus never wanted to be called under any circumstances. “Re—” Virgil started, his voice croaking from how little it was used all day.

The others and Thomas didn’t know what that phrase meant to Remus, but Virgil knew. And Janus knew. Janus knew, and even though he wasn’t saying it to Remus, he still said it. 

“Whatever,” Remus muttered. He waved away his nail art supplies and put the TV back in its place, this time turned off. He whirled around and stormed out of Virgil’s room. “Whatever,” he said again before slamming the door behind him.

Virgil slowly leaned to the side and laid down on the floor (careful not to smudge his nails which, though creepy, came out very good). He laid there as Remus slammed his door. He laid there as Roman sank into his room and turned on loud music to drown out his sobs (it didn’t work). He laid there as Patton and Logan and Janus went back to their respective rooms, Thomas’s dilemma apparently solved without ever needing to call on Virgil.

Fuck. 

[reigningdameoftherealm]

Dog Eat Dog

Carlos can’t afford to look out for anyone but himself. 

Warnings: kidnapping, violence, blood

Carlos hunched in the alley and stuffed the bacon into his mouth. The taste of grease, char, and fat exploded on his tongue and filled his mouth with saliva. What he wouldn’t give to eat meat every day. He licked his fingers and wiped them on his shorts.

Cackling laughter echoed somewhere along the alley, quiet and mad.

Carlos licked his greasy lips and hobbled out of the alley. He should probably find Mal. His collected tribute wasn’t enough, but it’d been a slow month. Maybe she’d overlook his measly contribution to pound some other poor sap.

His ankle panged as he made his way to Mal’s hideout. He grimaced, one hand out to steady himself against the wall. Hopefully it was just a sprain. He’d have to have Evie take a look. If she wasn’t too preoccupied with groveling at Mal’s feet.

The elevator cranked its way down and he stumbled inside.

Voices grew in volume as he ascended. Jay, Evie, and Mal’s voices made up the hushed clamor. Carlos’s heart sank. He must be last. Great. Nothing to distract from his pitiful tributary.

He braced himself as the elevator stopped.

“Carlos!” Jay’s eyes lit up. “Get in here, you dog.”

Carlos limped inside, frowning at the semi-darkness that shrouded his gang’s faces. “Uh, guys? Somebody forget to pay the electric bill?” He joked, wincing.

Evie raised her brow, her hair artfully flipped over her shoulder. “Carlos. We have a guest.”

Carlos blinked. “We do?”

“We do,” Mal pronounced, chin raised. Her hands rested on her hips as she turned around, powerful in her black and purple leather. Eyes glinted green as she smirked. “I believe you’ve met Captain Hook’s idiot offspring?” She gestured with a gloved hand.

Carlos’s mouth dropped open.

Harry Hook, Uma’s right-hand man, sat propped against a pole. His head rested against his shoulder, his black-lined eyes smeared and closed. Blood dripped from his mangled brown curls down his face and neck and bloomed into red stains on his shirt. His legs laid strewn before him in a heap. Red and purple blossoms dotted his face and neck and the skin exposed on his chest under his torn shirt.

“Harry Hook?” Carlos looked frantically to his companions, who all met his incredulous look with varying degrees of smugness.

“Uma let him off his leash,” Jay all but purred, crossing his thick arms, “and he thought he could wander into our territory.”

Evie gave the pirate a pitiful look. “It’s just sad, really. No fashion sense, and no common sense.” She met Mal’s gaze and they shared nasty smiles.

“What are we going to do with him?” Carlos asked, lip curling as he leaned back.

“Kill him, trade him, hold him hostage – the possibilities are endless, Carlos.” Mal gave Carlos a condescending smirk.

“Uma would give anything to have him back,” Evie agreed, nodding. Her blue curls bounced.

“But what does Uma have that we don’t?” Jay drew himself up to his full height and squared his shoulders.

“Nothing,” Mal simped, eyes glinting in the dim light, “but it’d be fun to watch her dance.”

Evie laughed.

“C’mon, let’s figure out a ransom note.” Mal and Evie headed towards the table littered with broken pencils and ink bottles.

Jay bumped shoulders with Carlos before going to join them.

Carlos spared one more glance for the unconscious pirate. His gut twisted.

Harry gazed up at him through half-lidded, cloudy eyes. He winced as he drew in a breath.

It couldn’t be easy to breathe. Jay knew how to tie someone just loose enough to let them draw in short, shuddery breaths.

Carlos grimaced at the memory.

They’d kill Carlos if he loosened Harry’s bonds.

Harry gritted his teeth through another nasally huff.

“Don’t,” Carlos murmured to his shoes, then he joined the others at their work.

[angelicblackwolf]

Sander Sides Fanfic: Shenanigans

My first fanfic, please be nice!!

Summary: Logan’s taking a snack break while working on Thomas’ monthly scheduling, but walks into a certain...scenario...that he wasn’t expecting at all though he probably should have.

Word Count: 1388

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Logan looks up to his now ringing alarm clock, informing him that it was time for his bi-hourly work break. After giving a quick glance down at the schedule for the next month (now over halfway done, he notes with a satisfying nod), he pushes his chair away from his work desk and starts preparing to go to the common room. At this point in the day, Patton has probably prepared a small, mid-afternoon snack for everyone, most likely the sugar-filled cookies he’s so fond of baking for the others. Everyone always enjoys it whenever Patton makes anything in the kitchen, all the boisterous laughter and loud bickering always echoes through the Mindscape when everyone is in the common room, and the mayhem had increased near tenfold when Remus had joined in; Janus mainly (thankfully) provided a more quiet contributions to the daily chaos, but still contributed nonetheless. 

So it would certainly stand that Logan was understandably a bit surprised at the silence that met him when he left his room. He only furrows his brow in slight confusion before heading towards the stairs and down to the commons. It could be possible that there were currently no occupants in the commons; either not everyone was there quite yet or everyone having already finished the mid-afternoon snacks (Logan was secretly hoping for the former, though if the later had occurred he had a slice of yesterday’s snack--a vanilla cheesecake--hidden in the fridge for his consumption) and when he descends the stairs he is greeted with the dining area and...something that certainly was not the scenario he’d been expecting.

Rather than the typical scene of waving, gesturing arms and heads thrown back in laughter, there were the creative twins, Roman and Remus, half-standing up from their chairs and glaring at each other as if one told the other that they were straight. Everyone else was there too of course, but they were in varying stages of distress.

Virgil’s sitting on the farthest side of the table, half ready to bolt from the tension in the air so he’s halfway leaning out of his chair. Janus was nowhere in visible sight, leaving Patton sitting in the figurative no man’s land with a shaky smile plastered on his face, sitting in front a plate on which the object that was causing such a standoff between the twins. Roman and Remus in question each less than an arms’ reach away from their prize:

The last cookie left from Patton’s double dozen, chocolate-chunk cookies, with both of their hands hovering over said cookie.

No one moved, nor even appeared to breathe, and Logan almost figuratively felt the tension in the air as thick as fog. He nearly jumped at the sudden voice of Roman, low and threatening, as he addressed his current combatant.

“You’ve eaten nearly all the cookies like a pig, you disaster dunce, don’t think I didn’t notice! Let Patton’s final cookie be treasured by someone with more... refined tastes.” Roman’s jabs had only caused Remus to let out a mocking scoff and smirk at his brother.

“Puh-lease, you’ve had more of these goodies than any one of us combined, don’t think I wasn’t counting too, so who’s really pigging out, huh?” Remus jabs back, his fanged smirk only growing at Roman narrowing his eye at the words.

Neither letting up on their intimidation acts nor their hands yielding an inch away from the cookie, with Patton stuck in between glancing at the two twins but trying to keep his gaze firmly on the plate in front of him, not to look at either twin too long so as to not appear to favor one over the other. At the sound of Logan coming down the stairs he glanced up towards the other bespectacled man and gave such a wide-eyed, pleading look at the other male that Logan almost felt compelled to intervene.

Almost.

He stays by the base of the stairs, firmly wanting to stay out of...whatever was happening here.

Logan notices movement coming from the other side of the room and sees Janus peeks out from hiding in the kitchen, having enjoyed his fill of the cookies and had moved his snacking on a small bag of potato chips; very much enjoying the impromptu showdown between the two creative sides with a raised eyebrow.

Patton, realizing that Logan is just going to remain a spectator along with Janus, tries to offer a compromise that, hopefully, wouldn’t end up with rainbow fire and fingernail clippings everywhere (such an occurrence happened when Remus had swiped the TV remote from Roman’s hands and it took nearly two weeks to get everything out of the carpet. Never again.).

Janus ate another chip. Patton takes a quiet breath to slightly ease his nerves before speaking.

“H-h-hey guys, um...why not...ya know...split...the cookie? In half? That way you both--” Patton wasn’t able to finish his sentence before Roman lets out a loud noise of offense that--in what was a silent, tense moment--had the volume equivalent of a bullet going off (that certainly made Virgil halfway leap out of his chair).

“Split the--Patton! I--You would ruin a perfect form of near ambrosia to satisfy this heathen’s endless appetite!? Have you no pride in your craftsmanship? Your passion?? Your--” and it was at this moment Roman realized that in trying to convince Patton to not pull a solemn Solomon, he had taken his hand away from the cookie-grabbing range in order to gesture dramatically as he usually does. And it seemed that Remus realized this at the same time.

The other brother then gives a dangerous smirk, his hand drifting closer to the cookie slowly, almost tauntingly. Roman gave his brother a near murderous glare as he started to stand up even further in his seat, summoning his sword for good measure.

“Remus, I swear, don’t you EVEN--that cookie is MINE!!” Remus stops his slow assault, never taking his eyes off of Roman’s own, smirk still in place.

Janus eats another chip, the crunch echoes in the silence of the room. No one seems to notice.

Virgil is sweating bullets and Patton’s not faring well either, his gaze filtering between the plate in the middle of the table and the twins at mental war with each other.

Logan’s just watching all of this go down and wonders if his study-break snack is even worth it.

Remus is staring at his twin brother dead in the eye as he freezes with his hand just barely hovering over the cookies, so close to his prize and oh god they’re still warm like freshly drawn blood, how can he resist--

But to everyone’s surprise, he slowly but surely retracts his hand from hovering over the plate, maniacal grin downgrading to a tight lipped, deranged grin. Roman, upon seeing his brother’s submission, lets out a huff. 

“Well it’s good to know that not all of your brain cells have completely rotted away,” he says, un-summons his sword for a second and-

-and all it took was that one second.

And in just one second, the cookie is swiped off the plate and shoved in Remus’ grinning mouth. In the next second the man is leaping out of his chair  and booking it towards the living room while maniacally cackling, not caring that he let his chair fall backwards with a clatter nor the crumbs he’s most definitely spreading all across the carpet, because in the same second Roman’s sword is back in his hands and he’s hot on Remus’ tail, yelling out profanities towards his fleeing brother.

Janus is now on the floor, clutching his stomach from how hard he’s laughing, his bag of chips dropped on the floor next to him.

Virgil face-plants onto the table, his nerves finally crashing so that he didn’t bolt for the stairs like he initially suspected and now too exhausted to even try.

Patton just lets out a sigh of resignation, already making a mental checklist of cleaning supplies he’s going to have to bring out when the twins are done with their fighting that they were currently doing in the living room, given the amount of crashes and thuds coming from that general direction.

Logan just decided that the cheesecake wasn’t worth it and went back upstairs, leaving the others to their...shenanigans.

[devnny]

HAMBURGER SUSHI.

Devi, Tenna, and Johnny walk back to their car. | 1650 Words

I wanted to put this in CH11 of JTRM, but couldn’t get it to transition right... so I made it a drabble instead! :]

(Don’t let the fluffy start fool you, this is a comedy!)

“I bet you broke his fucking nose.” Tenna remarked nonchalantly while they walked, picking at the remaining food on her plate. Devi only hummed in reply, but Johnny smiled to himself at the idea. He hoped that she had – the stupid fucker had earned more than that.

His heartbeat fluttered in remembrance of the small blood splatter that he had noticed on the wall as they left; the spot where that heckling douchebag’s face had rebounded from the force of Devi’s blow before he hit the floor. A silent, content sigh eased through his nose. She was so wonderful.

Johnny’s eyes wandered to the side to watch Devi as she ate. His mouth bent up adoringly in response to the slight curl of her lips over her chopsticks. She was so happy just a few minutes ago, gleaming and laughing about something he had done – he still wasn’t completely sure what, exactly, but it had pleased her so much, whatever it was, and he was delighted that her joy was his doing. The fact that she was still smiling faintly only made him feel warmer inside.

“Hey! Nny!” Tenna’s voice distracted him from his thoughts, and his pupils snapped in her direction. She looked confused, and a little annoyed.

“Have you tried any yet?” She asked, in reference to the bizarre ‘hamburger sushi’ she and Devi were eating. Johnny grimaced.

“No.” He said flatly. He had very little interest in trying such an odd sounding dish – sushi was not his thing, and he could barely recognize any of the ingredients from what he could see off of Devi’s plate, let alone tell if the meat was cooked or not. Tenna gasped in horror.

“YOU GOTTA.” She demanded, surprised that any mortal could resist the delicious allure of hamburger sushi. She snatched up one of the remaining, mangled pieces of her roll with her chopsticks and shoved it in his mouth faster than he could comprehend what she was doing. Devi leaned back in surprise when Tenna’s arm jutted past her face in order to reach Johnny’s, and she stopped in unison with him to watch his expression twist uncomfortably.

Johnny stood in shock with his hands held up in front of his chest, his fingers locked in varying levels of disjointed-looking curls. His eyes winced as he tried to comprehend the pure disgust he was undergoing, and his mouth wrung and twitched uncomfortably as it strained to adjust around the uninvited wad of food without touching it any more than it had to.

He hadn’t even bothered to absorb any tastes or textures of this ‘food’ – he was too focused on the fact that Tenna had just jammed her used chopsticks into his mouth, as well as the fact that he had no idea how much she had handled the particular piece that was now unwantedly cradled between his teeth.

Had she bit it previously? Did her saliva get all over it? He had no idea! DISGUSTING!

Devi made an ouchy face as she watched Johnny’s face twist further and turn an odd, green color. He turned away from them and spit his undesired snack onto the sidewalk with a loud, overly dramatic PTOOEY!

“HEY!” Tenna exclaimed in offense. Johnny only gagged and hacked, coughing and spitting any and all remaining moisture out of his mouth for good measure.

“AUGH – REVOLTING!” Johnny languished with his eyes squeeze shut in disgust. Tenna huffed.

“It is NOT!” She rebutted, jabbing her finger in his direction. “It is a street DELICACY.”

“I’M NOT REFERRING TO THE FOOD, YOU FOOL.” He wretched back around to stare at her with hostile eyes. “I potentially have your SLOBBER, and all manner of whatever filthy cultures live inside your mouth, IN MY MOUTH!”

Tenna’s jaw hung open in insult as he went back to spitting on the floor.

“I am NOT FILTHY!” She yelled. “I SHARE MY FOOD WITH YOU, AND THIS IS WHAT I GET?”

Devi broke into a new set of laughs from the stupidity of this disagreement, and Tenna’s brow creased in annoyance. Johnny was lucky that Devi was still in a good mood from the night’s ‘success’.

“Here, Nny.” Devi eased out her last laugh in a sigh, and handed him one of the napkins that she had jammed into her pocket. Johnny took it gratefully, and scrubbed his teeth and tongue with it before wadding it up and throwing it away from him in revulsion.

“Oh my GOD, SHUT UP—” Tenna barked, but was interrupted by Devi patting her hand in her direction.

“Don’t think too much of it, Ten.” Devi chuckled again. “And, you know damn well how he feels about being touched, so I don’t know why you thought spoon-feeding him would go over well.”

“Okay, WELL, I didn’t think he was a total germaphobe! FORGIVE ME.” She crossed her arms as best she could with a plate in one hand.

“And he called me a fool!” She added. Johnny turned his nose up with a huff.

A light, but firm, tug on his leash made him aware that Devi expected him to respond, and he grumbled, crinkling his neck as he lowered his head into his shoulders.

“I apologize for calling you a fool, Tenna.” He said blankly.

He still felt like she was – what kind of person just puts a dirty utensil in someone else’s mouth without warning? – but he could appreciate, with some prodding from Devi, that Tenna had bothered to share with him in the first place. Tenna only snorted, but seemed placated for the time being.

They continued walking back to where they had parked at the Camera, and Johnny sulked in silence, annoyed about being disrupted from his lovely thoughts about Devi with such a random, stupid event. He felt like he could never get a moment’s peace, even now, when life was so much easier and untainted by the influence of otherworldly demons. Well, besides Reverend Meat, of course.

Tenna dropped her now-empty plate into a streetside garbage can, and Devi paused to finish what remained of her meal so that she could dispose of her plate as well. Johnny watched her pluck up the last piece of her roll, but was surprised when she pointed it in his direction instead of popping it in her mouth.

“You want the last one, Nny?” She smiled. “I promise I didn’t lick it.”

Johnny’s mouth dipped, and his cheeks warmed from her additional, playful comment.

He had shared things like chips or cookies with her before, but never any kind of completed dish, and certainly not with her ladling it into his mouth. The mild intimacy of the action made his heart beat wildly, and he squirmed in place, uncertain about if he wanted to accept or not. The fact that Devi’s lips had touched her chopsticks didn’t repulse him as it did with Tenna, but he was still very wary about whether he would even like what she was feeding him.

Johnny leaned his head further into her space and opened his mouth hesitantly, deciding to take the chance, if only for the memory of Devi offering him her food by hand. Devi turned her wrist, lifting the piece up for him to take, and Johnny closed his lips over it cautiously. He stood upright while he chewed, and Tenna stared at him in incensed astonishment.

“Hmm.” He hummed. “It really does taste like a cheeseburger.”

“WH— YOU JUST MADE A HUGE DEAL ABOUT ME AND GERMS AND—!!” Tenna threw her arms out in his direction several times, but Johnny only chewed and watched her wordlessly.

“That was good.” He looked back to Devi, who smiled snidely as she threw her trash away. “I almost feel badly for spitting the other piece on the ground.”

“YOU FUCKING SHOULD!!” Tenna yelled at him, but was again ignored. She continued to try to argue with him while they rounded the corner of the theater, with no success.

As they approached Devi’s car, however, something dawned on Johnny, and he jumped out in front of the group to point at Tenna with wide eyes and a large, vindictive smile.

“SHOTGUN!” He screamed at her, and Tenna gasped.

“NO!”

“—I CALLED IT, I CALLED IT.” Johnny taunted, vindicated in using the rules that he thought were so ridiculous against her this time. He tugged Devi urgently to the passenger side and smacked his hands on the roof of the car like a drum.

“NO!! I CALLED IT FOR THE WHOLE NIGHT!” Tenna demanded, trying to shoo him away, but Johnny wouldn’t budge.

“I CALLED IT, didn’t I, Devi? I called it!” He turned back to grin at her, and Devi stared at him incredulously before breaking into another set of snorting chuckles. She wedged between him and Tenna, and Johnny stood back with his tongue sticking out past his smile as he watched Devi unlock the passenger door.

“Yes, Nny. You called it.” She exhaled a few more puffing laughs, and Johnny made a victorious, high-pitched sound from his throat, before throwing open the door and scurrying inside, lest Tenna attempt to steal his rightful spot.

“DEVI…” Tenna groaned as she took the handle of the back door, and Devi laughed again.

“STOP LAUGHING AT ME. I liked you better when you were stoic and unfun!!” Tenna cried out from the backseat indigently.

Johnny cackled maniacally as he settled his hand on the radio. He waited for Devi to start the car, then cranked the volume up as high as he could stand, just like she liked it. Devi smiled approvingly at him, and he pressed himself comfortably, and smugly, into the fabric of his seat.

“—And I liked YOU better when you were the crazy guy Devi HATES!!” Tenna yelled at him.

Johnny closed his eyes blissfully and pretended he couldn’t hear over the music.

[slushrottweiler]

Vesuvia University Institute of Medicine and Magic: Kink and Fetish Study

Chapter 3: The use of vibrating paraphernalia and its effect on improved phone interactions

The latest chapter in my smutastic sex study fic, featuring every one favourite Disaster Doctor, and apprentice Terra. For today's @smutember entry "Quickie" and "Toys"

...

Holy fuckstick that is a lot of cock!

Laid out in a neat row on her bed was the largest collection of sex toys Terra had ever seen outside of the internet.  The assorted rainbow of coloured paraphernalia varied wildly in shape, size and materials. From simple peach-toned dildo to a sleek glass phallus, to the three-pronged pink monstrocity with a variety of attachable ridges, textured sleeves and seven-speed vibration settings; it would seem that every kind of penetrative sex toy had been included in Terra's recent parcel. 

She picked up a vibrator at random; this one a stylish mauve with artistic curves meant to pleasure both the clit and g-spot. After fiddling with the settings, the device began to whirr softly and Terra let out a bark of laughter. She dug her phone from her back pocket and dialled the most recent number on her register. If she was honest, her call and text log was mostly just this one number.

The call was answered on the second ring, and Terra didn't wait for a hello before chiming in.

'Why the fuck did I just receive a bouquet of cocks?' 

Terra heard Doctor Julian Devorak choke on the other end of the line. She was beginning to enjoy startling the man.

[[MORE]]

'Terra! I ahh... um well you see... ah hang on.' Julian stuttered, and Terra switched off the purple vibrator as she flopped down amongst her new presents. A technicoloured toy shaped like a 'roided out flower bumped into her forehead and she batted it away.

She could hear the doctor shuffling, then a door closing tightly and Julian clearing his throat. 'Sorry, I'm in my office now. Did you just say you received a severed appendage?'

Terra cackled, 'No! I got a box of dildos, you twit.'

'Oh! Well that is far less disturbing. Why didn't you just say that my dear? You know how to scare a man!' Julian's voice relaxed noticeably and Terra let a smile start to form on her lips.

'We sent them to you to try out. Experiment with alternate stimuli, that kinda thing.' He continued.

'You want me to use ALL of THEM?' Terra sat bolt upright on her bed and looked around at the sea of dicks that surrounded her. 'I don't even know what some of these are! Like, what the actual fuck is this spirally one supposed to be?'

Terra picked up a glittery silver vibrator, that tapered off into a corkscrew. It had a heavy knob at the base and what appeared to be a large suction cup. The button at the base triggered the motor, and it began spinning wildly, startling a cry from Terra. She could hear Julian laughing on the other end of the line.

‘I think that one is supposed to be a unicorn cock?’ he chortled.

‘What?’ Terra squawked, tossing the toy across the bed.

Between chuckles, Julian managed to respond. ‘I thought you’d enjoy the whimsy of it.’

‘You picked me out a magic horse dick!’

He choked on his own laughter and Terra grinned from her side of the call. She switched off the unicorn dildo and pushed it to the far side of her penis rainbow. If she was honest with herself, she’d always been fascinated by the creative variety of sex toys but had been too chicken to purchase any of the more outlandish models. With that in mind, she could guess that a few other toys were based on the reproductive organs of various mythical beasts. 

‘Well they’d make a good talking point for dinner parties.’ Julian suggested.

‘Yeah,’ Terra laughed, ‘I’ll just place this flower dick on a bookshelf and see how many people think its modern art.’

‘I genuinely dare you to do that.’

The two snickered together at their own joke. Terra brushed her hand over the toys, eventually settling on the rabbit-eared one that had caught her eye. This one was a smooth silicone toy, the kind of high end design that tried its best not to appear like a penis. Deep, luxurious red; she stroked the length of it, pleased to find it had no seams on the shaft, or clit stimulator. She turned it over in her hands, pressing a button at random. 

A soft hum filled the space. This toy didn’t rotate, simply quivered in her grip. She could control the speed of each independent motor of the toy, and she experimented by rotating between intensities and rhythms. She switched her phone onto speaker to test out the sensation on the palm of her hand. 

The vibration tingled through her fingers and up her arm, a rolling rhythm that made her eyelids flutter when she pressed it into a sore joint of her hand. 

‘I think I’ve found my favourite.’ She mumbled absently.

There was a sharp gasp from the phone. ‘You’re trying them out now?’ Julian asked.

Terra turned and flopped down on her pillow beside the phone. She waggled the toy at the device, as though Julian could see it.

‘Just against my palm. If nothing else, it’ll do wonders for my hand cramps.’ 

‘Well that’s something. Which one is it?’ Julian asked.

Rather than answer, Terra scooped up the phone and snapped a quick picture of herself, posing ridiculously with the vibrator held against her cheek. A few of the other toys could be seen at the edges of the frame, but mostly it was just a closeup shot of her goofy pout and the red vibe. Without thinking, she sent the photo to Julian.

‘I don’t know the name, its this red one.’ She explained.

‘There are three different red ones.’ 

‘Yeah I know. Is red your favourite colour or something?’ Terra teased.

‘Mahogany actually, but red is rather –’ he trailed off when the bing of an incoming text signaled, and Terra grinned at the ceiling as she imagined his gobsmacked face. She thought she heard a strangled groan, but it was gone in a rumble of chuckles. 

‘That is… unreasonably adorable.’ Julian declared. His voice was pitched a bit lower, possibly to keep the volume down. 

‘What can I say? I am just a bundle of cuteness.’ She replied sarcastically. 

‘Yeah...’ Julian trailed off with a sigh. 

Moments tricked by in silence, and Terra checked her phone to see if the call had dropped. Tapping the still-active toy against her shoulder, she asked, ‘So, do I need to take notes on them or something?’

Julian cleared his throat before responding. ‘Yes, if you like. Otherwise you can call me, and I can record the data. You could film it if you were comfortable with that.’

‘Yeah, nah.’ Terra said. ‘So you’d guide me through it?’ 

The line between them seemed suddenly heavy with tension. Julian hadn’t been present for any guided masturbation sessions since ‘The Car Incident’, as Terra had been calling it. They’d still met up plenty, but their experiments had been self-guided, with Julian taking on the role of silent observer. It hadn’t yielded as consistent a response as their previous tests, and a part of Terra was itching for the doctor to have a more active roll.

‘Um no.’ Julian answered, and Terra tried not to feel disappointed. ‘But we can angle it a different way. I’m looking to progress the angle that you respond more to the actual speech than who is saying what. Less instruction kink and more a voice kink. So we can try you describing to me what you are doing, and I can take down the notes.’

The idea of describing herself getting off to Julian did have some appeal, but not as much as she would have liked. Still, she was being paid to try these things out, and the idea of Julian listening in as she got off had its perks. She wondered if maybe, late at night when he was tired and not thinking quite so straight; did he get off on the images of her he had seen that day? Did he think about her touching herself, think about touching her himself . 

She turned the vibrator over in her palm. Terra knew she shouldn’t be hoping for things like that. Julian was her supervising doctor for Christ’s sake. But… she still wanted him to want her. Just as much as she did. Which was cruel and wrong and not something she should be thinking about. She needed to get this out of her head, focus her mind on something else.

‘Are you busy now?’

‘Huh? Wha, no not really.’ Julian stuttered adorably.

Terra reclined back on her bed, kicking the other toys onto the floor and settling comfortably in a warm patch of sunlight. She switched the vibrator onto its lowest setting and touched it gently to the exposed skin of her thigh. The tiny tremors were pleasant and just a little naughty, and she let out a low hum as she traced the vibrating tip in random patterns.

‘That’s good doc. Don’t want you working too hard.’ Her own voice had slowed, turned thick and smooth like honey.  

‘I’ll have you know I maintain a very healthy work/life balance.’ 

That earned a lazy snort from Terra, who let her eyelids flutter shut -- to focus completely on the sound of Julian’s voice and the rumbling vibrations. 

‘Which is why you’re constantly found asleep at your desk?’ 

‘Well maybe my desk is just surprisingly comfortable.’ 

‘I’ll have to test that for myself doc.’ Terra purred, and she heard Julian swallow thickly over the line. With a shiver, Terra dragged the toy up her thigh until it skimmed the edge of her denim cut-offs. She skimmed the tip against her inner thigh as goosebumps trailed in its wake.

‘Would you like that my dear?’ Fuck, Julian’s voice had taken on that deep tone he used when he instructed her. She couldn’t tell if he did it on purpose; if he was teasing or serious, but the sound had anticipation coiling in her stomach and heat pooling between her legs.

‘And if I did?’ Terra purred back, ‘Maybe I want to imagine being laid out across your desk. Spread across it like a dream.’

Carefully, so she didn’t jostle her phone from where it balanced on the pillow beside her, Terra unsnapped her shorts and kicked them away. Her underwear was already damp, and she immediately pressed firmly down on her aching clit. A low groan escaped as she massaged the aching bud through the light cotton, her other hand still ghosting the vibrator against her skin. 

When Julian spoke again, he sounded torn between arousal and frustration. ‘Damnit Terra, that’s not --’

‘It’s just a fantasy doc. Isn’t that why you sent me this box of toys? To let me play?’ This was the first time Terra had taken such a talkative role in their sessions, and the sound of Julian’s breathing growing laboured was a jolt to her system. 

‘Is that what you’re doing? Playing with me?’ he groaned.

Terra smirked. ‘Well, right now I’m playing with myself.’ As if to punctuate her words, Terra turned the vibration setting up, so the rumbling buzz sounded louder in the quiet afternoon space. She slid the tip under the seam of her underwear, stroking it back and forth until a full body shudder rolled over her. She heard Julian curse quietly.

‘How about it doc? Wanna play with me?’

‘Terra…’ he dragged out her name, a warning mixed with a plea.

‘Come on. For science…’ Terra knew she was treading a very fine line. She was probably stepping over it. But right now, with the ache between her legs and the sound of Julian’s breath in her ear, she couldn’t seem to help herself.

‘Fuck. You will be the death of me.’ Julian hissed and a breathless laugh escaped Terra as she realised she had won. As if this was the signal she had been waiting for, Terra pulled aside her underwear and finally pressed the vibrator fully against her clit.

Her back arched off the bed on impact, a shaky gasp mixing with Julian’s groan. Not wanting to go slowly, she rubbed the rumbling vibe fully against her clit, hips bucking up to meet the toy. It wasn’t hard to imagine Julian’s attention fully fixed on her, knowing he was listening with rapt attention from the other end of the call.

‘Tell me what you’re doing Terra.’ Julian asked. His words shook as he spoke, and it only egged Terra on. 

‘For science?’ She teased and revelled in the snarl that echoed through the phone.

 ‘Just tell me, please.’ he begged and oh, that was a new and exciting sound.

Terra dragged the toy down over folds until it was coated in her slick. Lining up the shuddering tip with her entrance, Terra pressed the toy into her slowly, letting the pleasure of her being stretched fill her voice.

‘It’s inside me.’ she panted once it was pushed to the hilt. The two soft ears settled easily on either side of her clit, and she quickly cycled through the patterns to find a roiling pulse that made her toes curl. ‘Fuck it fills me up so well.’

‘Gods Terra.’ Julian huffed and she started to move.

Keeping her wrist action steady, Terra slowly eased the toy in and out of her. As she panted, she quickened the pace, letting the toy press up against her g-spot with ever push. She was so wet, it glided easily in and out.

‘I’m going slow. Its… fuck, its bigger than I thought it would be.’ humming low in her throat, she sped up slightly, meeting her own movements with a thrust of her hips. Julian groaned, and a loud thump sounded, as though he had just slammed his head back against a wall.

‘It feels so good doc. Reaches all the right spots.’ she murmured, turning her head so it faced the phone beside her head. Julian’s voice was tinny through the speaker, and was muffled, like he was holding the phone close to his lips. God, now Terra was thinking about his lips. Firm and pink, and so quick to quirk into a sly smile. She could see him in her mind’s eye, leaning over her on all fours as she plunged the toy deeper, pressing the ears more firmly against her clit.

Julian swallowed hard. ‘Does it fill you up darling?’

Terra’s reply was a whimper and an increase in speed. Her hips jerked up as she fucked herself harder with the vibrator Julian had picked out for her. The steady buzz mixed with the wet slap of silicone meeting skin. Her own gasps seemed to reverberate off the walls of her bedroom, but she was focused solely on the quiet sounds coming from her phone. There was a clack of metal and fuck… was that a zipper.

‘Julian…’ Terra gasped and the doctor gifted her with a full blown moan that had her grip tightening on the toy. ‘Julian, are you…’

‘Don’t.’ he groaned, and she strained to hear the sounds in the background of Julian’s call. A steady thumping blended with his panting breaths, keeping time with her own actions. 

‘Just,’ Julian continued through his teeth, ‘Just dont stop.’ he groaned.

Terra moaned, her free hands gripping her hair as she fucked herself harder. ‘I won’t. I can’t stop.’

The sounds of sex bounced between them, Terra’s moans turning to heady pants as she pushed herself higher. She was so wet now, her own slick coated the toy and her own fingers. Sunlight warmed her quivering legs as her imagination melded with the sounds Julian made. 

With a particularly strong thrust, Terra all but squealed and arched of the bed, throwing her head back as the vibrations pulsed through her. Her actions disrupted her phone, which slid away and fell off the pillow. Instantly she whimpered at the loss, eyes snapping open to flail madly across her bed until she could scoop it up again. Quickly tapping it off speaker, she pressed the mobile against her ears and whimpered in pleasure at effect. It was like Julian was panting right in her ear, like he was pressed against her and the sounds pumped heat into her blood.

‘Don’t go.’ She begged without thinking. She pressed the phone harder as she slammed the toy into her aching cunt. “I’m getting close…’

‘I’m not going anywhere darling.’ Julian groaned on the other end of the line. ‘I’m right there… with you.’

“Fuck Julian. Fuck, fuck, fuuucckkk…’ Curses and pleas tumbled from Terra as she neared the edge. Julian moaned along with her, his cries muffled like he was biting his lip. Screwing her eyes shut tightly, Terra let herself sink into the vibrations of the toy and his voice, until she felt like she was wound so tightly she would snap.

‘Oh fuck, I’m cumming!’ The words ripped out of Terra and she came. Her orgasm smashed into her, hot and quick, with the sounds of Julian's gurgled moans filling her head. Her whole body seemed to shudder as the vibrations pushed her over, mouth open wide in a perfect silent O.

It took a minute for Terra’s brain to reboot. She slid the toy out of her with a quiet squelch, turning it off and letting it drop beside her without a care for the sheets. Considering how wet she was, she would have to change them anyway. Heavy panting came from the other end of the line, and Terra wondering if it was just an echo from her own ragged breathing of if it was really Julian who was so out of breath. 

‘Well,’ Julian cleared his throat before he spoke. He did sound a little out of it. ‘I think we’ve found your new favourite toy.’

In her orgasm-fried state, Terra just threw her head back and laughed.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

 

Julian stared at the phone he had just hung up. The standard call screen closed after a moment, revealing the last thing he had looked at besides the call. Filling the screen was a picture of his patient, pouting ridiculously. Her hair was spread out against her pillow in a vivid green halo, amber eyes flashing with mischief in the afternoon light. And poking her in the cheek was a deep red vibrator, its dual ends just visible in the shot.

The very same vibrator he had just listened to her get herself off with. A sex toy he had bought her.

Because she was a Patient in a Study HE was supposed to be supervising.

Looking down at himself, Julian cringed at the sight. His fist was still clenched around the base of his cock, softening after he had come hard to the sinful sounds coming from the girl he couldn’t seem to get out of his head. His own cum was splattered against the dark denim of his jeans, hanging low on his hips from where he had pushed it out of the way just enough to free himself. 

Dropping his head back against his shut office door, Julian covered his eyes with his arm, and groaned.

He was well and truly fucked.

[moonlightmadnessreviews]

Don’t Look Now

  You know what the air feels like towards the end of September? Where it’s breezy, but not enough to cool you down or whip your hair into your face? That’s what this night was like. I’d left work much later than usual, so even on this summer night, I’d already missed the sunset. There wasn’t a trace of the pinks and purples in the sky that people sit out on their porch to enjoy. Parking spots for paralegals were lined up about 10 or so rows behind that of the lawyers, meaning I had quite a walk back to my car. The parking spots sat in front of a line of thick, tall trees. They looked like bodyguards standing watch over the varying vehicles. I usually didn’t mind the walk back to my car but on this particularly cool night, I’d noticed the light closest to my spot was out. As I saw this, my eyes followed the post downward catching sight of some shattered glass. Instantly, something just didn’t feel right to me.

  My pace quickened and I fumbled inside my bag searching for my keys. Reaching my old Volvo, my fingers finally felt something familiar. Just then I heard a rustling coming from the tree line. I scanned the tree line, unable to tell exactly where the sound had originated, but I could hear what sounded like footsteps, and they were growing louder. My hands were shaking and I could feel the blood pumping harder with each passing moment. I was trying to keep my breath steady and I could feel sweat beginning to bead up on my forehead. As I finally pulled my keys out, I heard the sound again but this time there was no confusion as to the source. The sound was coming from just beyond my Volvo, only a few yards in front of me. I stared into the tree line and heard a loud, phlegm filled cackle. Having been startled, my nervous hands lost their grip and dropped my keys. I bent down quickly and searched for them as I now heard the sound of something exiting the tree line.

  Nerves made 3 seconds feel more like 3 hours and the sprint from behind my car to the door seem like a marathon. My heart was in my throat and I felt like I could hardly breathe as I unlocked the door. Praying my car old car would start, I jammed the key into the cylinder and turned. Nothing. Looking back I know how typical it all sounds; A young lady fearing for her life gets stuck in a car that won’t start up. But in the moment all I could do was slam my fist into the steering wheel, my eyes welling up with tears. Again and again I turned the key, growing more hysterical with each attempt. I could have tried it 100 times in all, but once I finally heard the engine turn over I almost wished it hadn’t. As my lights came on, they shone on the image of a hooded man. He had what looked to be a hammer or an axe in his hand. I could feel the screams already forming in my throat as he began approaching the car. His strides were long and calculated. His form, now free of the flood of light from my car, was a tall silhouette. The screams made their way out of my throat as he began banging on the glass and flashes of light blinded me as I tried to push my body away from the window.

  I screamed until I was sure I would pass out. “The locks! Kim lock the God damn-“ I thought to myself, just as the door swung open. A gloved hand reached inside and grabbed at my wrist, squeezing hard enough for me to hear the leather creaking. My lungs could hardly take in air quickly enough and as I grew lightheaded, my scream grew weaker, dying down in volume. This meant it was just quiet enough for me to hear a familiar sound. Laughter. But this wasn’t the cackle I’d heard earlier. It was a very familiar laugh in fact. I was still seeing stars from the flashes of light, but I could hear just fine, if not better than normal due to my heightened awareness in the moment. “Happy Anniversary babe!” shouted my husband. Scott was laughing and holding back tears, unlike myself who was letting the tears flow freely at this point. My entire body felt locked up and tense in a strange combination of fear, confusion and anger. “I wish you could have seen your face! Wait, you can, but you’ll just have to wait for the Polaroids to develop!”  He stopped to catch his breath, and then continued. “Kim that was so much better than I’d even imagined it would be. How did you not recognize me when the lights came on?”, he said through loud chortles.

  I had been so wrapped up in the case I was assisting on that I’d completely forgotten our 2 year wedding anniversary. Through my tears I finally managed to put together a somewhat coherent string of words. “Scott how the hell?... The lights!... How long where you in the trees Scott?” This was the opportunity he’d been waiting for. He was so excited to give me the details of his plan that he stood with his feet shoulder width apart, knees bent and hands out in front of him as though he was going to pitch one of his movie ideas to a studio executive. “Okay so once you called me to say you’d be late, I figured we wouldn’t be going out to dinner. I thought I’d drive to the florist and come down to surprise you instead. I wound up parking in the client parking just in front of the building, so as I walked back to your car, I noticed the lights by the tree line and the gravel. I started trying to shoot out the closest lights with a couple of stones and then I just waited behind the trees. I couldn’t have been out here for more than… 20 minutes? I’m not sure, it may have been closer to 45 minutes but it was worth it in the end. Oh! The Polaroids are developed! Here! Take a look!”

  My husband Scott was a jerk. Don’t get me wrong, I love him, but being my husband, he knew just how to get under my skin. Scott worked in special effects and had worked on a number of horror movies, as if that were a surprise. He and his brothers were raised on Romero, Carpenter, and King, whereas I was raised on Disney movies. He’d tried to get me to watch some movies with him when we’d first started dating and seeing how I reacted to each scare with an ear piercing scream, he quickly realized he could make a game out of this. It really did bring him great pleasure to see me frightened, no matter how mad I’d get at him afterwards.

  It wasn’t that he couldn’t tell that these tricks didn’t amuse me, he simply didn’t care. On one occasion, he’d placed a fake head in the pantry. The material this severed head was wrapped in looked just like human skin and the blood that oozed out of the mouth sent me stumbling backwards into the wine rack. Having also spilled my coffee all over the floor, a laughing Scott cleaned up, made me pancakes and began brewing another cup of coffee. Scott would put effort into apologizing to me after each of these pranks, but he eventually grew to learn it was better keeping his distance afterwards, unless he wanted to resemble the prop head in the pantry. As mad as I could get, the apologies were simple, but appreciated. The downside was that Scott felt he could get away with this behavior, leading to worse pranks as time went on. If he’d hide in the laundry room with a creepy mask on, he’d cook me salmon for dinner. On one occasion he’d sent me a video of a puppy, along with a caption that read “Did you hear the cute little noise it made at the end? Turn the sound up!” 15 Seconds into the video, the face of a demon popped onto the screen and let out a scream nearly as loud as my own. That earned him a night on the couch, but I ended up with a brand new purse.

  People say that you shouldn’t accept behavior simply because you’ve grown accustomed to it. Over time though, Scott’s behavior began to wear me down, and it was showing. I was tired of this routine, so I decided it was time to have some fun of my own. We were now nearing the end of September and going into Scott’s favorite time of year: The Halloween Season. Fox Hills was a small town, so the costume shops were already opening up. I bought some glow in the dark fangs, a white wig to cover up my big brown curls, and some prop intestines to cover with some of Scott’s homemade prop blood. I’d left everything wrapped in a white dress and stuck it under our bed. I had a leg up on Scott since every now and then I would be long gone by the time he’d wake up for work. Slowly shimmying my way out of bed, I grabbed my “Scare Kit” and crept into the garage. I made sure to unscrew the lightbulb that hung just over Scott’s pickup to help give me just enough cover, then, once my costume was on and I was sufficiently covered in fake blood, I climbed into the bed of his truck. When I finally heard Scott making his way down the hall and into the garage, I tried to be as quiet as possible. I knew that if I gave myself away, there would be no way of me getting a second chance at this.

  The light switch flicked on and off 2 or 3 times and I could hear Scott’s confusion manifesting itself in the pauses between each try. With a frustrated huff, he made his way over to the old Ford. As the doors unlocked with a loud KA-THUNK, I loaded my mouth up with fake blood. The stuff tasted horrible and I grimaced as I accidentally swallowed some. The old Ford’s engine turned over and that was my cue. I slammed my hands against the glass just behind Scott’s head and let out a scream worthy of a banshee as I spewed the fake blood from my mouth. The look on his face as he saw me in his rear-view mirror was exactly what I’d dreamt of. He let out a scream I didn’t even think he was capable of and punched the horn of his pickup so hard I was surprised the airbags didn’t deploy. I’m sure I lost some of my hearing in that moment but once the horn finally died off, I couldn’t help but laugh hysterically!

  I’d done it! I’d gotten him back for all those times he’d nearly made me wet myself! Once Scott realized what was going on, he couldn’t help but join in my laughter, as nervous as his sounded in comparison. “Kim I could kill you right now!” he screamed. “What goes around comes around.” I said, waving the fake intestines at him. He stepped out of the cab and grabbed my face in his hands. “I don’t think I’ve ever been more proud of you babe. Despite the heart attack I’m in the middle of, I have to admit, you did good.” My cheeks were nearly numb from how hard I was smiling when I saw a look come across Scott’s face. My smile quickly began to fade as I realized just what that look meant. “You do know this means war right?” said my husband. “With Halloween just around the corner, who knows when I could enact my revenge.” Scott’s evil grin curled up at the edges, but softened a bit when he saw the dread on my face. What had I opened myself up to? How could he possibly do any worse than what I’ve been through in the past? Seeing I was already worried, he kissed my forehead and wished me a good day as I climbed out of the truck and headed back in the house for a shower.

  Surprisingly, the next few nights went by without incident. Scott was being extra sweet which only made me grow more and more paranoid. The days turned to weeks and I got more uneasy as the time passed. One night I’d come home to boxes of chocolate waiting for me and Scott laughed as he saw me check each one for bugs or some other kind of rancid trick. A few nights later he took me to the movies and when his truck suddenly broke down on him on a long dark stretch of road, it took him nearly an hour to convince me that his brother’s weren’t going to pop out of the trees with chainsaws. After that night I realized that Scott had switched up his tactics this time and was getting a kick out of seeing just how paranoid and on edge I was, so I decided to let it go and just relax.

 It was Halloween night and my phone rang as I was sitting home alone on the couch.

“Hey babe, I’m sorry I’m calling you so last minute but I’m going to be stuck here on set a little later than I’d anticipated.” said Scott, his voice sounding genuinely disappointed.

“That’s fine. I get it. The food will be in the fridge so feel free to make yourself a plate whenever you get in.” I was disappointed of course, but this wasn’t the first call like this I’d gotten during our marriage. “What do you want me to do with the bottle of wine you bought for tonight though?” I asked.

“Enjoy it. I don’t know when I’ll be home so take it as a sign of my most sincere apologies. I love you Kimmy.”

“I love you, too. Just try not to wake me when you get home. Bye.” I hung up, disappointed to have movie night ruined but not disappointed enough to keep me from opening the bottle of wine. I decided I’d catch up on a few shows I had lingering on my DVR, and let all the stress from my latest case wash away with the night. Now truth be told, I wasn’t really much of a drinker. In fact, I only ever drank if Scott and I were heading out to dinner. Well into the night, I was on my third glass of Merlot and began feeling a little buzzed and more than a little tired. I’d figured I’d hop into the shower to complete my night of relaxation and then head straight to bed.

  Pulling the shower curtain aside, I let the water run for a couple minutes. A nice hot shower always helped me to relax for bed and the last few drops of wine certainly helped. In our shower was a beautifully framed window made out of thick frosted glass. I always loved the way it looked on nights like this, the moonlight adding an otherworldly glow to it. Not wanting to fill the bathroom with steam, my showers were usually on the warmer side, I cracked the window open an inch or two at the top. I undressed and stepped into the tub, sure to let my feet settle as I was feeling somewhat off balance from the wine. I began to shampoo my hair and laughed to myself a bit as I closed my eyes. I had a habit of shutting them as tight as I could to avoid blinding myself, but I would often speed through working the shampoo in and rinsing it out so I could open them back up as quickly as possible. This only got worse after I’d watched “Pyscho” with Scott for the first time. It had obviously left an impression on me.

  I could feel a cool breeze making its way in through the top of the window, only to be stopped dead in its tracks by the steam. The blue moonlight was shining through the window and my eyes, blurred by the running water and wine of the evening, were taking in its beauty. I continued washing off, my dark skin glowing and taking on the look of polished obsidian as the moon shone through the frosted glass. Then, ever so subtly, I noticed the light wasn’t shining through as brilliantly as it had just moments before. “It’s only a passing cloud Kim. No need to start getting yourself all spooked,” I reassured myself. “Just a big passing, autumn cloud.” But there hadn’t been any clouds in the sky just a moment ago, had there? “Just a cloud Kim. Nothing but a cloud.” I said to myself, feeling more confident this time. I smirked at the thought of myself getting all spooked over nothing.

  It was the sound of rustling leaves that shattered my confidence. Rustling leaves and the sound of footsteps approaching my window. A cloud couldn’t make that sound, now could it? Hesitantly, I began to turn my head towards the frosted glass window. My head was moving so slowly, I was sure I could hear my neck creaking like an old wooden door. When my eyes finally fell upon the window, I could make out the outline of a tall man. His lanky figure was accentuated by the backlighting of the moon. He stood there like a statue, cold and stoic, with fewer than 10 feet between us. I heard the rustling again and tried to steady myself as, through my opaque shield, I could see him closing the gap between us. As statue-esque as he’d been just moments before, his strides were long and graceful now. He moved with ease and, though I could hear the crunching of leaves as he approached, he seemed to be floating.

  I felt myself wanting to back away but my body simply wouldn’t let me. “Don’t move a muscle Kim. He might ignore you if you can only manage to stay still.” I said this to myself as if I wasn’t already aware that he could see me thought the frosted glass, if only in distorted shapes. The figure had made it to within a few feet of my window now and I could see it examining me through the glass, it’s head tilting in childlike curiosity. Now I was the one as still as a statue, frozen in fear. With every ounce of will I could muster, I managed to reach behind me and move the shower curtain aside. Though I was sure no man as tall as he was could make his way through the 2 inch opening at the top of the window, I would lock the door to the bathroom from the outside, just to be sure. With the curtain out of the way, the lights from the bathroom were now illuminating his features. Though distorted through the glass, I could make out stringy hair framing his face. I could hear a popping and cracking sound as its willowy chin moved from one side to another, as though adjusting its jaw. His head was tilting back and forth now and I was positive he had a better view of me that I of him. I grimaced and covered myself up.

  Then I noticed the large dark circles around his eyes. My God it looked as though he hadn’t slept in ages. The man seemed to be so tired the dark circles around his eyes drooped down onto his cheeks. Could this be some bum wandering through back yards, hoping to steal some food from an unlocked house? Or could he be looking for more than just a meal? God his eyes… his eyes seemed wrong. How I wished I could just run out of here but his eyes had cemented me in place. The dark bags around them seemed to grow bigger, taking up half his face. They just seemed wrong, unnatural. Oh God. Those were his eyes. Just as his eyes had grown to cover his face, I saw the dark circles disappear as he blinked, the pale face becoming featureless only for the great big circles to reappear again and stare at me. Over the sound of the shower, the water still beating down on the porcelain, I could hear the horrible sound of him breathing. He sounded sickly, his breath shaking as he inhaled. His exhale sounded just as labored, the air whistling as it exited his lungs. I finally managed to take a few steps out of the tub when I let out a deafening scream.

  I’d been startled when the figure slammed his hands against my window. “Go away!”, I screamed, this time my voice not just in my head. “Go away! My husband will be home any minute!” I was lying. “He’ll be home any minute and he carries a shotgun with him in his truck!” Another lie. I just wanted to scare him off, to get him to back away and run back into the woods or wherever it was he’d come from. I was crouched down on the floor now, hiding behind the tub. As I reached in to turn the water off, I glanced up at the hand that had slammed against the window. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end as I saw a hand nearly the size of my head pressed firmly against the window. A pale shriveled palm adorned with 3 long slim fingers was groping at the glass, almost as though it was trying to grab at it. Almost as though it was trying to grab at me! What the hell was this thing? Where had it come from? I could see what looked like a mouth on the end of each finger. Each one was opening and closing as you’d imagine a leeches mouth to do when it grabs hold of your skin. “I swear to God my husband will kill you when he gets home! Leave me alone! Just leave, Please!” My voice was becoming horse from screaming. I was still crouched on the floor of the bathroom when it now pressed its face against the glass, the big black eyes staring in and blinking, its jaw moving from side to side.

  With nothing between its sickly skin and the glass, I could make out the nightmarish features even clearer now. One feature in particular made me wish I could somehow tear my eyes away. As it adjusted its jaw from side to side, I could see what look like lips folding back. Snarling. They revealed a set of teeth who’s size was only rivaled by those big black eyes. A regular set of teeth this size would have been disturbing, but this thing had a mouth as inhuman as its hands. It had rows of teeth, overlapping one another. But they weren’t sharp, not like a sharks teeth. They looked almost human, though this thing was far from it. They were big and yellowed, flat at the bottom which made them look more like cleavers than serrated knives. The further it’s lips drew back, the more rows were exposed, and just then it began making an awful sound. It was like a tree full of cicadas. The teeth began to chitter, crashing into one another violently enough to be heard. Every now and then it would take a sickly breath in and start chittering its teeth together again, sometimes they’d even click against the glass. All at once, it stopped. It was motionless. It took another deep breath and its attention seemed to be drawn upwards above its head. It looked at the opening at the top of the window and its hand, with its long leech like fingers, began making it’s way through.

  It’s fingers were wrapped in a thin, slimy skin. It was thin enough to make out purple and red veins running the length of its appendage. The leach like mouths at the tip of its fingers opened and closed as though begging for food. Each one was lined with needle like teeth, much different from the ones in it’s mouth. There was a sickly yellow puss oozing from each fingertip and a foul stench beginning to fill the room, something like a corpse left to decay in a hot room. I gagged as the smell grew fiercer. The chittering started up again and I could hear the beast’s sickly breathing, but there was a different tone to it this time. It was more like the sound of a rabid dog who got a hold of a scent it was quite enjoying. The breathing was accompanied by a slurping sound, like it was trying to keep from drooling all over itself.

  I don’t know if it was the fear finally mounting and pushing me or if it was the smell making me nauseous enough I could feel myself swallowing vomit back down my throat, but I jumped to my feet and slammed the window shut, managing to just miss the leach like fingers reaching for me. The beast let out an unnatural shriek, a strange combination of a howl and the shrill cry of a banshee as if coming from two different creatures. Its hand flailed around in pain while I backed up, the figure still howling from behind the window. I began backing up, not even bothering to grab a towel, I had far more to worry about. As my hand grasped the doorknob, the figure began to bash its face against the window. It battered the window again and again, cracks forming in the thick frosted glass. Should this thing break into my home, would anyone come to help me? With the beast shrieking like a wild animal caught in a trap, someone had to have heard it, right?

  I turned to run and heard a crash of shattering glass behind me. As I ran through the hall leading to my bedroom, I could hear glass crunching under its feet. The chittering started again, the sick, ragged breathing, the slurping noise. My wet feet fought for grip against the cold hard tiles, slapping with each step. I made it to my room, slammed the door behind me and hid between my wall and bed. I could hear heavy footsteps approaching, the ragged breathing and cicada’s chittering. I grabbed my pillow from the bed as I sat against the wall, my heart beating in my ears. It was all I could hear. The silence was all I could hear. With my face buried in my pillow, I realized I could no longer hear the breathing, or the footsteps. Was it right outside, simply toying with me or had it gone? Would it try to sneak in through the windows which sit just above my head? As I turned to look out the window, I was half expecting to see that face staring back at me, clearer this time.

  The sound of the rattling door knob shot through the dark and silent room like a shot gun blast. It wasn’t about to let me leave this room. I screamed, hands and face digging deeper into the pillow. The figure threw its body against the door, each thud ringing louder than the last. I could feel my tears and spit soaking into the pillow case, but I couldn’t tear my face out of it. In that moment, it was like a shield to me, and I wasn’t letting go but my heart stopped within the next second. Two cold hands grabbed at me, digging into my shoulders. They shook me violently back and forth, and through my screams, I could hear a familiar voice.    

“Kim! Kim relax! Kim, God damn it, what the hell is wrong with you?” It was trying to fool me! I refused to open my eyes.    

“Kim, please, calm down. You need to stop screaming. What happened to the window?” It couldn’t be Scott, It couldn’t be! But as the hands brought me closer to the voice, I could finally make out my husband’s face through my waterlogged eyes. That thing couldn’t have been Scott- the body, the hands – they didn’t match up. It hadn’t been him. But how could I attempt to explain anything to him… How could I explain it to myself?

  Attempting to gather my thoughts, I felt the words get lodged in my throat. The look in Scott’s eyes told me it hadn’t been him and he wasn’t just playing dumb. No level of special effects prowess could bring that nightmare to life.

“Scott… there was… I was in the shower… It was through the window… The sound was…”

  I looked up. I was frozen in place. The chittering, that disgusting chorus of bugs filled the room. My eyes locked on Scott’s, I could just make out a figure crawling on the ceiling above him. With a beastly shriek, the figure dropped down. My head slammed into the wall behind me and my vision grew blurry. Scott’s screams were the last thing I heard before everything went black.

November 3rd , Fox Hills, NY-

   A Fox Hills woman is being questioned by authorities in the suspected butchering of her husband on Halloween night.  Kimberly Allen, 28, was found naked and laying in a pool of her husband Scott Allen’s blood. Mr. Allen, 30, was found dismembered from what looked to be repeated blows from a cleaver, which is yet to be recovered. Mrs. Allen was found unconscious from what is suspected to be a self-inflicted blow to the head, a blow authorities suspect she carried out to help support her story of an intruder. First responders made it to the scene after a concerned neighbor called in what they suspected to be a domestic dispute. The caller, who wishes to remain anonymous, say they called the Fox Hill’s Sherrif’s Department after hearing Mrs. Allen’s screams and what sounded like shattering glass. They did say Scott could be heard yelling shortly after, but exactly what was said is unclear. Mrs. Allen is sticking to her claim that there was no such dispute and Mr. Allen was attacked by an intruder, the true culprit of the attacks on her and her husband, and has in fact asked for higher security outside of her cell. No foreign finger or foot prints have been found at the scene and no other arrests have been made.

  They’ve moved me to the Fox Hills Psychiatric Center. As I sit here now, crying through interrogation after interrogation, all I can do is wonder why. Why didn’t it take me? Was it the sirens? Did the first responders scare it off somehow? I don’t know if anyone will ever believe me. Despite his jokes and cruel pranks, my Scott was a good man. The figure though, that otherworldly abomination, is still out there and I would be foolish to think it won’t find me again somehow. I got lucky that night, as sick as that sounds, but next time, that may not be the case. Next time there may not be sirens or concerned neighbors to scare it off. Thankfully, the authorities have taken my one request seriously. Just this morning, they added another guard outside the door of my room, and two guards just outside the frosted glass window that sits above my bed.      

[sharksabrejr]

You and Finn

Warning: Explicit and angsty and love triangles

August 2013

Finn is not the type to remain in bed long after waking up. No matter how tired he was or how late he came to bed or if he was in someone else’s bed, years of training and learned discipline had instilled in him that he spring out of bed the moment that he was awake.

But seeing you still asleep next to him, Finn pauses, and instead of jumping to his feet, he props himself up on his elbow to face you. He nuzzles closer, gazing at you and brushing back the hairs that fell on your face. Not for the first time, Finn thinks of how he’s already broken several of his self-imposed rules for you.

“You’re watching me,” you mumble into the pillow.

“I am.”

“Stop it.” You open an eye and groan. “I must look horrid. I forgot to remove my makeup before I fell asleep.”

“Can’t.” He kisses your bare shoulder. “You’ve bewitched me, woman. I can’t look anywhere else.”

You draw the sheets up to your chest and place a hand over your mouth when Finn leans down to your lips. Undeterred, he kisses the area where your jaw and ear meet. “Finn, let me brush my teeth first,” you whine. “Morning breath!”

“I don’t care.” Finn’s words are muffled, lips still buried in the crook of your neck. You let him move your hand aside and graze your mouth with his tongue, opening your lips slightly to let him in. He kisses you deeply, drawing back only when you’re gasping and smirks at you with some satisfaction. “Babe, you should see what I’m looking at right now. You’re beautiful.”

You bite your lower lip shyly. “It’s been a while since I’ve done this,” you admit.  “I’m not used to having a man in my bed.”

Finn runs his hand on your inner thigh, enjoying the hitch in your breath whenever his fingers brush against your mound. “It sounds like we should take more time to familiarize ourselves with each other then.”

July 2013

Finn joins his friends at the table during the midst of a heated debate. “A girl does not dress like that and just come in a place like this to read a book! I bet you, she’s just waiting for a guy to hit on her,” Gallows insists.

“I have some breaking news for you Gallows, women dress up and put on makeup sometimes because they feel like it,” Matt Jackson fires back. Except for Finn and Nick Jackson, the rest of the table laughs.

“Who are we talking about?” Finn asks curiously. Discreetly, Nick jerks his head in the direction of the bar where you’re sitting. Oblivious to the conversation taking place, you flip to the next page of your novel.

Fale squints at the title. “Remarque. Good taste.“ He scowls at everyone’s nonplussed stares. “What? I read! Fuck all of you!”

“Oh wait, she’s not reading now,” Karl remarks. Finn looks, and sure enough you’re now looking in their direction, more specifically, his. Seeing you’ve been caught, you flush and set your eyes back to your book, appearing a bit more determined in reading than before.

“Fuckin’ hell, how long did that take?” Gallows cackles righteously at Finn.

“Ah, she can’t help herself. Just take a look at this mug!” Karl nudges Finn good-naturedly. But Finn’s not listening. He’s still looking at you intently.

Across the room, your finger traces the spine of your book, cheeks still pink. Finn can’t think, can’t move, can’t breathe.  His chest feels like he just got the wind knocked out of him. He’s vaguely aware he’s staring, but he’s frozen in place. You overwhelm all of his senses.

His friends watch him with varying degrees of humor and bemusement. “Finn!” Nick calls him, to no avail.

“Shit, I think he’s a goner,” Karl says with a laugh.

You’re paying the bartender for your absurdly pink drink and get up from your stool, ostensibly to leave, and Finn crashes back down to reality. He could not- would not- let you disappear into the night. Ignoring his friends, he runs to catch up to you but you slip out the exit and fall from his sight.

He runs out to the street looking around wildly, but you’re nowhere to be found. Despondent, Finn dismisses the idea of returning to the club and keeps walking.

The idea of him running after a girl sounds laughable. Finn’s never had to chase after anyone- it’s not an exaggeration when his friends joke about how he has to swat away female attention. He just literally ran after a woman he didn’t even know. What in the hell had just happened that made him abandon all reason?He’d only seen you for a few minutes and he could not stop thinking about you.

Finn continues to walk around in circles, for how long he didn’t know when he suddenly scoffs. This was ridiculous. How could he be feeling this much… loss  over someone he didn’t even know?

Ignoring the pang in his chest, Finn decides it’s time to turn in. He heads to the direction of the railway station, only to see you walking out of the adjacent ice cream parlor.

Finn does a double take. It is you, licking a cherry blossom cone and still cradling your book. You approach him slowly, shyly tucking a lock of hair behind your ear. Finn just watches you, trying to commit as much of you as he can to memory. Your body pauses but your eyes- bright and vulnerable- betray your thoughts.

Finn reads you easily. Relief.

You’re looking at him expectantly now with those eyes and Finn realizes your lips are moving. “What?”

A corner of your lips turn up. “I said, how long have you been waiting for me?”

October 2013

It’s not perfect. You’re indecisive- it’s impossible to take you out anywhere without you taking an hour to decide on which pen to buy or which coffee to order. You’re flighty, taking up yoga as a hobby one week and then giving it up for piano lessons the next. You’re terrible at pretending to be interested in Finn’s comic books or Legos, and your taste in music is godawful.

But damn if Finn isn’t falling hard for you.

He’s the first one to say it. Several ex-girlfriends had told him “I love you,” and a few times he’s responded in turn. This is the only time where he’s certain his feeling is genuine.

You spend more time in Finn’s flat than your own nowadays, so he’s not surprised when he finds you with a book on his sofa when he comes home. Finn doesn’t say anything to you just yet, familiar now with how grumpy you get when you’re interrupted from your reading. You don’t acknowledge his arrival, but toss the cushion on your lap aside. Finn kicks off his shoes and lays on the sofa with you, resting his head on your lap.

Finn pulls out his phone, just to have something to do until you put your book down, but you’re freshly showered and he can smell his conditioner on you and you’re running your fingers through his hair and it’s all too distracting. He peeks up at you, observing how your lips move to mouth each sentence you’re reading and the way your granny glasses are perched on the bridge of your nose. Light freckles are scattered in the area where your nose meets your cheeks, barely perceptible even when you’re not wearing make-up.

“You’re staring at me.” You don’t take your eyes away from your page. Finn hums affirmatively in response. Finally you finish your chapter and after taking care to place a bookmark before you put your book away, lean down to kiss his forehead. “It’s just as distracting, you looking at me like that,” you scold him, but you’re smiling and you lean down to kiss him on the lips this time.

It was something that had been gnawing at Finn for weeks, almost immediately since he’d met you. Every time your lips meet, he’s sure. “I love you,” he says when your lips part. “I know it’s hardly been a month and I don’t want to scare you off, but I do.” Your face falls. “I want you to know. It’s okay if you can’t say it back.”

“That’s the thing.” Your eyes speak volumes to Finn. “I can say it back. But you know as well as I do. We’re on borrowed time, Finn.”

April 2014

“No no no brother,” Karl tells him repeatedly. “You’re not throwing your career away over some girl you dated for four months.”

Japan is fourteen hours ahead of the States. You’ve been gone for three months now. There’s been a lot of texts, phone calls, and Facetime, but it’s not the same. Coincidentally, or maybe not, the amount of phone calls from Matt Bloom since you left has increased.

Your eyes widen in shock when you open the door and see him on your doorstep. Finn is dismayed by your reaction. It had been months since the two of you had seen each other in person. He wants to hold you, to kiss you, but you stand there with your arms around your shoulders, as if shielding yourself from him.

“Finn…” you start to say, but your expression tells Finn what you’re going to say next so he beats you to it.

“Just wait. I want you to know it’s taking all of my willpower not to take you in my arms right now and kiss the hell out of you, but I want you to hear me out first. Will you do that for me?”

After a long moment, you nod slowly. You hold your door open and step aside to let Finn into your apartment.

August 2013

Finn and you plan on him meeting you at your apartment and walking to the restaurant together. So far, you have only able to meet for coffee once before his schedule for the G1 made it impossible for him to make any plans until now. Although you hadn’t had a chance for an actual date until tonight, the texts between the two of you have been frequent, and steamier with every back and forth.

Finn takes a couple of deep breaths before knocking, trying not to appear too eager. You cock your head to the side and grin when you open the door for him. “Hey there stranger.”

Finn smiles back, licking his lips as he eyes you up and down.  He takes a long moment to appreciate your outfit, a sheath dress with a sheer neckline that stops high above your knees. “You’re stunning,” he compliments you. “That dress… wow.” He pretends to fan himself.

“Thank you.” Your blush shows under your makeup. “The dress is my roommate’s. I’d introduce you, but she volunteered to spend the night with one of the other teachers when she learned that I had a date. She’s very optimistic-” Too late, you realize that you’ve said too much and your flush deepens.

Finn chuckles. “Well, I like her already.”

“Can I get you a drink before we go? The restaurant’s a bit of a walk.”

“A glass of water would be good.” Finn follows you into your tiny kitchen, his eyes glued to you. Not unintentionally, he stands close to you, so that when you turn to reach for a glass, your face is inches away. Instead of backing away, you stay rooted in place, meeting his lusty gaze unflinching.

“I’ll stop if you tell me if I’m going too fast,” Finn says. “It’s been a really long three weeks. I could hardly wait to see you tonight.”

“You seemed so busy, I was worried I was texting you too much.”

Finn’s hands circle your waist and beckons you closer. “No, talking to you was always the highlight of my day.”

“Really?” You purse your lips, trying to contain your delight.

“Yes. I can’t tell you how much I… appreciated the last few photos you sent.” He wags his eyebrows.

Your cheeks feel like they’re burning. “You seemed so stressed I thought you’d like some distraction.”

“Yeah, I definitely liked the distraction.” Finn pins you against a nearby counter top, never breaking eye contact. You close your fingers around his wrists.

You close your eyes at the first brush of his lips. It’s a sweet kiss. Chaste. Gentle. Incomplete. His hands tighten around your waist, and you feel him trembling. You could sense that Finn was holding back, that he was bursting to do more.

“I won’t break you know,” you say when he ends the kiss. “Kiss me- the way you want to.”

It’s all the permission Finn needs. A little more roughly, he traps you among the counter, his left hand wandering to the small of your back. You look up at him through your eyelashes with bated breath.

It’s a hot embrace. Finn’s lips move on yours fervently, plying your mouth open with his tongue and leaving your mouth searing. His fingers spread along your jawline, stroking your cheek. You submit to his caresses easily, and- to your own surprise, you press yourself against the front of his pants in invitation.

You break apart, a little worse for wear. “Are you hungry?” Finn asks you huskily.

“No,” you gasp.

You never do make it to the restaurant.

You take Finn’s hand and lead him to your bedroom. Teachers quarters are notoriously cramped, and your tiny bed takes up more than half the bedroom. You beckon Finn to sit on the edge of your bed. You waste no time straddling him and joining lips again, your hands busy unbuttoning Finn’s dress shirt. Unexpectedly, you giggle when you see his chest and torso.

“What’s so funny?”

“It’s silly I know, but my god Finn…” You marvel at the hard, sinewy muscles of his abdomen. “Have you ever had a carb in your life?”

Finn pretends to think about it. “Not really.” He flips you to your back and works on the nape of your neck, his knee nudging your thighs apart. Your back arches off the bed at the first touch of your panties, his forefinger and thumb rubbing at the crux of the damp lace. His attention turns back to your lips simultaneously, and you write beneath him.

You pout at him when he pauses. “Babe, stand up.” He helps you to your feet, your legs much shakier than when you first got on the bed. “Turn around. Brace your hands on the wall.” Finn reaches up your dress, tugging down your panties.

You help him pull your dress up to your waist, and then you have to bite your arm to muffle your scream. Finn spreads your rear cheeks apart, his mouth going straight to your inner lips and laps at your wet folds with gusto. Humming, he pulls you closer, his tongue darting into your cunt. You’re quite unprepared when he suddenly slaps your bottom, the sting resonating through your core and forcing a shudder.

“Please, please, please,” you beg. Finn acquiesces, the underside of tongue rolling against your swollen nub. He reaches around to hold you steady you when your knees go weak, pressing down on the skin beneath your belly button. This amplifies the sensation, and you ground against his face. He smacks you again, and the simmering in your lower belly heightens until your legs are so wobbly you’re about to fall forward. Finn draws you to the bed, instructing you to get on your knees above his face. Your palms on the mattress behind you, you rock yourself on his mouth until you’re squealing.

Finn gives you a break to get rid of your dress and bra completely and hardly gives you a warning before his arms reach under your thighs and pull you back over his face. “Relax,” he murmurs when you stumble on the bed. “Lean into me.” With little effort, you succumb to his mouth.

His pants now within reach, you make quick work of the buttons and run your fingers over his bulge. You savor Finn’s sharp intake of breath below you when you pull his cock from his boxers, grasping the base and massaging him softly.

Finn grunts, and his assault on your clit quickens. You laugh, drunk with pleasure, and lean forward to skim your tongue on the length of his cock, rewarded with a deep groan. You close your lips over the head. “Mmm.” You suck your cheeks in and slide your mouth down slowly, flattening your tongue against his shaft.

He slams his head back on the mattress. “Fuck. You want me to blow my load before we even get started, woman?”

Elated by his response, you repeat the motion several times, alternating your hand and mouth. Finn tries to distract you, palming your breast and flicking your nipple but you’re implacable. You’re about to claim victory when Finn inserts a digit into your pussy and you regretfully retreat.

He adds a second finger and pumps them in and out, until you’re ready to scream.

“Condom?”

“Second drawer on the desk.”

Finn hastily slides the latest over his cock and flips you back on the bed,  positioning himself above you, and enters you in one swift stroke. You take a deep breath, it had been a while since you’d been with a man, and it takes a minute for you to adjust. He waits for you patiently, tracing your jaw and planting soft kisses on your neck and collar.

“Okay.”

He starts slowly, to ensure your comfort, and you spur him to go faster. His pace is maddening, thrusting into you almost languidly, maintaining a rhythm that would build you close to ecstasy, but always withdrawing at the very last moment. To no avail, you try to press him closer, but Finn’s hold keeps you immobile.  “Fuck you,” you grit your teeth at him, frustrated to no end. He replies with a cocky smile and an abrupt roll of the hips that causes you to whimper.

“I’m having as hard a time as you are. You feel so good, love.”

Your arms and legs cling to him when he finally allows you to come apart, an explosive release that almost has you swooning. He heightens the intensity, his movements against you becoming faster and more erratic until he shudders and collapses into the crook of your neck.

Arms intertwined, you lay there for a time, enjoying the close proximity of your bodies. Finn shifts his head up to give you a long, lazy kiss. Automatically he goes to get up from the bed, but your arms grip his shoulders in protest. “Don’t get up.” As a rule, Finn doesn’t stay overnight at a woman’s place- it disrupts his routine, and your twin bed was much too small for the both of you. You join your forehead to his, eyes hopeful. “Will you stay?”

May 2014

The contract is on the desk in front of Finn, and one of the most important men in the industry holds out a pen.

Your voice echoes in the back of his head. It’s not going to work! I love you, but I’m not coming back. I don’t want to be so far from my family again. I received a really great job offer here, and… I think I met someone.

“So what do you say?” Hunter asks him. “We’d really love to have you.”

December 2013

You spend your last days together in Finn’s apartment, rarely leaving his bed. It goes unsaid, but it’s a last minute attempt to drink in each other as much as you could. On the morning your flight is set to depart, Finn opens his eyes to see you already dressed and ready to go.

“Shit, I’m sorry babe. Why didn’t you wake me up? Just let me throw something on and-”

“No Finn,” you say gently. You sit on the space of the bed next to him. “I’ve already called a taxi, it’ll be downstairs soon.”

“I told you I’m going with you to the airport.”

“You have a show tonight! The last thing you need is to waste five hours in Narita waiting for my flight to take off.” Your eyes shine with unshed tears and you try to joke. “It’s not as if phones doesn’t exist, we’ll talk to each other all the time.”

Finn erupts. “I don’t care if I’m there all day! Fuck my match- you’re leaving and I’m not going to waste a single second that I could be with you.”

“I’ll apply for a travel visa as soon as I can. We’ll take turns visiting each other-”

“I’ve been in my line of business for fourteen years. You think I haven’t seen how long-distance relationships go for my lot? You’ll be there two months and then you’ll tell me you’ve met some prick-”

“What about you!” You scream back. “Even when I’m with you those wannabe models are throwing themselves at you and don’t even have the decency to wait for me to have my back turned-”

“I’ve never paid them a lick of attention! It’s only been you since I met you!” Everything that you hadn’t discussed comes out. “I told you I love you and I meant it and you’re goddamn looking at me like you’re saying goodbye. You really suck at hiding your feelings, babe.”

“Half of your buddies are fucking around on their wives and girlfriends. I’m being realistic. They told me what you were like before.”

“Why are you throwing this at me now! Tell me to my fucking face, do you want to end this?”

You bow your head. “I don’t want to go,” you sob. “I’m in love with you. I’m sorry it took me so long to say it. I was trying really hard not to- this was all supposed to be temporary, I never planned to make a life here.”

You lean into Finn’s shoulders and automatically his anger dissipate and his arms circle you protectively. “This is me being selfish. I don’t want you to go with me to the airport. I’m not going to get on that plane if I don’t leave now, Finn. Please don’t make this harder for me.”

possibly more to come if I don’t delete my tumblr… 

[franklyshipping]

Movie Magic ~ A Jacksepticeye Ego Fanfic

A'AIGHT sooooo this lovely prompt was sent in by @magicleemarvlerous aaand it’s pretty darn cute. All I can say is, @jackleeboy-man is gonna wish he had more control over his giggles! LET’S BEGIN!

Oh the scene was perfect, I’m actually almost jealous. Settled on the beige couch were two enamoured gentlemen, to be specific, one magician and one superhero. Jackie-Boy Man was lying on said magician, his body spread out on the furniture comfortably as he stretched his arms and rested his head on them. Marvin smiled at him softly, internally awwing because come on.....when someone trusts you enough to lie on you.....isn't that just so adorable? Marvin had one hand nestled in Jackie's hair, whilst his other casually rested on his torso. Yes. Casually. Why what were you thinking? Did your mind just jump to how Marvin's fingertips must be casually tracing Jackie's ribcage, but in a mindless way so it would totally be perceived as accidental? Well......you'd be correct. Despite the fact that an enrapturing superhero movie was playing, Marvin's metatarsals seemed to have a mind of their own with their patterns and absent geometry.

Now, I imagine you are civilised. So, you will know that when you are watching a movie with company it is common courtesy to maintain a quiet volume. No outbursts or continuous noise that could otherwise distract others who are trying to enjoy the film based media. However, in this instance, Jackie seemed to be having a bit of difficulty. As in, he was encased by a soft, but constant, stream of giggling as he tried to maintain his focus on the TV screen, as well as keep his body still. The hero nibbled his lip with a wide smile, and was determined to try and ignore the swift tingles and sparks shooting through his ticklish system; his efforts were in vain of course. Now as you can imagine, Marvin was heavily displeased. How dare his boyfriend be so rude, making so much noise and disruption like this?! Marvin glanced down at him, and was withholding a smirk as he saw Jackie's raw determination at work......not that it was working, but the effort was commendable. Marvin still couldn't believe it though, I mean even AFTER he'd let Jackie choose the movie for the third time in a row too? Such rudeness.....

'Pffffttttt......'

Marvin was brought from his thoughts when a soft, spluttered laugh came from Jackie; oh.....that was it. Marvin reached for the remote and paused the movie, which made Jackie freeze up and gulp with evident nervousness.....he slowly looked up to Marvin, and whispered lightly in the wake of Marvin's intense stare.

'.......are uhm, are you okay?'

Marvin stayed silent for a moment, pondering his reply. He was practically emotionless too, but that soon changed as a soft smirk started to take over his features.

'Well I would be. I was looking forward to spending time with you, watching a nice movie and relaxing.....but you just had to giggle didn't you? Honestly love I think you might have a problem.....'

Jackie couldn't help but blush, and have to fight back even more giggles at the teasiness that laced his boyfriend's tone. Nevertheless, he replied indignantly.

'B-But it's not even my fault! You're the one.....wh-who's.....'

The hero trailed off embarrassedly, suddenly remembering that Marvin's hand still rested on his ribs......he had to be careful. From Marvin's point of view though, he hadn't been careful enough. Marvin fractionally narrowed his eyes and leant forward, so he was partially looming over Jackie as he growled.

'Are you actually......blaming ME, for your lack of self-control?'

Jackie's eyes were widening at how.....intimidating Marvin was becoming, and it rendered him silent. He could feel his heart beating faster and his cheeks growing hotter as the anticipation built in the air. However, and this is extremely important so please take note. He was still lying, with his arms behind his head.....all exposed and open; he had made no move to change his position, which Marvin noticed, and found incredibly precious. The magician smirked wider, and continued speaking in his low, gruff tone as he shifted so he straddled Jackie's thighs.....it won't surprise you to know that Jackie blushed a hell of a lot more at that.

'Oh you have no idea how much I'm going to enjoy punishing you right now.'

Jackie's eyes widened as Marvin leant closer to him, and they were almost nose to nose when Jackie finally tried to push him back.....but Marvin only grabbed his wrists, eyes sparkling. Without another word, he dove in. His lips and scruffy facial hair scratching wildly at Jackie's neck, all the while he nibbled the....extremely ticklish, skin too.

'Nahahaha oho gahad nahat thihihis! Thihihis ihis ehehevihihiiil!!'

Jackie cried out as he burst into immediate, high pitched, squeaky giggles. Without his hands he had no way to fight back against Marvin's diabolical onslaught. He tossed his head about as he smiled, and let me tell you that smile was amazing. Whenever Marvin saw it his heart skipped a bit, it was the sort of smile that had magic or healing powers.......the kind that you just know is special. At Jackie's words though.....Marvin chuckled, for this had opened up the perfect opportunity. 

'Hmmm.....for a strong hero, you seem to get yourself into a lot of evil scenarios don't you? I'd have though you'd know better.....than to rile up a villain.'

Marvin had purred in Jackie's ear as he kept nuzzling, and he felt the immense joy build up when a strangled noise of embarrassment came from Jackie's throat. Since this particular little ''trope'' had quite the effect on the hero.....his shivers and stammers proved that I think.

'B-Buhut y-yohohou're n-nahat aha vihihillain!'

Jackie exclaimed, squirming as nervous chills shot down his spine and whimpers cut through his giggling. Marvin had to work hard not to 'aww' and litter his boyfriend with kisses there and then.....but he had a malevolence to maintain. He administered a final nip to Jackie's neck before rearing up and simultaneously pinning Jackie wrists above his head; he kept them down with one hand as he spoke.

'Ohh but I am. I'm the most evil villain you could possibly imagine......and, this is only the beginning of your punishment.'

Jackie gulped as he looked up into Marvin's eyes, which twinkled beautifully, but Jackie could barely focus on their beauty due to how unbearably flustered he was. He couldn't lie. He'd imagined this so many times. The thought of Marvin turning on him like this, being so intimidating and teasy and......oh lord. Jackie was only flustering himself more with his own thoughts. He was soon drawn out of them though, since he could feel something.....start to scratch his tummy. Ah. He'd forgotten that Marvin had a free hand. The scratches were sudden, fast, and unrelenting against his poor sensitive tummy.

'NAHahahaha nonono dohohon't doho thihihis Ihi cahahan't!!'

Jackie cried out with a squeal, he wriggled about in vain whilst also tossing his head so he didn't have to looked at that handsome, and yet maliciously teasy, expression above him. Marvin smirked as he cooed.

'Awwww, coochie coo my little hero booooy! Well aren't you just adoooorable!'

Marvin was having the time of his life as he let his fingertips splay and scribble randomly, relishing in Jackie's unbridled giggling as well as his immense embarrassment. Seeing how he'd try to hide away at the sound of his teasing.....it was just so perfect. However......he hadn't started this just to end up with giggles; he planned to coax out way more than that, which Jackie began to realise when a fingertip flicked over his belly button.

'NOHO M-Mahaharvy Mahahaharvy behe nihihice! Pleheheheeeease!!'

Marvin paused, which encouraged Jackie to take in some air.....he was going to need it after all. Jackie waited nervously, but then he swore his heart actually stopped when Marvin finally spoke.

'Oh but darling......Villains. Are never. Nice.'

With that, Jackie squealed and fell into loud cackles as one of Marvin's fingers burrowed into his navel. Or, as Marvin perceived it, a cute bundle of nerves that had to be exploited no matter what.

'FAHAHAHACK NAHAHAHA!! MAHAHAHARVY NOHOHOHO!!'

Jackie wailed as he thrashed about and bucked wildly, the jolts of ticklishness that passed through him from that one little spot were almost more than he could fathom. Marvin kept up his wriggling, since he was determined to go all out.

'Tickle tickle tickle! Awww, does someone have a ticklish tummy buttoooon?'

The teasing was the last straw. Jackie's filter broke as he wailed like his life depended on it.

'SHUHUHUHUT UHUHUP YOHOHOU BIHIHITCHY AHAHASSHOHOOOLE!!'

Marvin did indeed shut up, and even relented on his torment of Jackie's poor belly button. But he still kept his wrists pinned. Ohh.....oh this was the perfect excuse.

'Do you have any idea......about how unwise those comments were?'

Marvin spoke slow as his eyes shone. They shone and twinkled with mischief that Jackie knew all too well, and as he looked into them nervously through his gasps for air.....he knew he was done for. He still tried to stammer though, in one last hope.....even though he could feel the magician's fingertips begin to shift, moving away from his tummy.

'N-Noho I-I didn't m-mean it I-I'm sorry I s-swear!'

Marvin, to be perfectly honest, almost melted at the sound of Jackie's desperation.....but he didn't stop. His fingertips had started their journey, wandering and occasionally fluttering and they traversed up Jackie's torso....to their destination which lay at his underarm. Jackie was a squirming, whimpery mess as he tried to tug at his wrists.....but nothing would dissuade Marvin now. His fingers had found their destination.

'I know, but now I have an excuse to torture you properly!'

Jackie properly, and I mean properly, screeched as Marvin's evil fingers scratched and scribbled and dug in to every last inch of his hollow; the magician varied in speed too, just to keep Jackie on the edge of sanity. To be perfectly honest though, I'm pretty sure Jackie was close to teetering over that edge.

'NAHAHAHAHAHAHA NAHAHAT THEHEHEHEEEERE!!'

At Jackie's cry, Marvin couldn't help but laugh softly along with him.....seeing him smile so wide, laugh so hard, blush so deep; god he never wanted it to end. Especially since he got to be a teasy shit.

'Oh? Not under your arm? Huh.....weeell how about under both?'

Marvin smirked as he released Jackie's wrists so he could give both his hollows the same evil, diabolical treatment. Now let me tell you, Jackie screamed. However fear not, it was a scream of complete and utter unbridled joy before he descended into the wildest hysteria that you ever could hear; all the while his arms crashing down as his body writhed at the intense sensations.

'MAHAHAHAHAHAHARVEHEEEE!!! MEHEHEHEANIHIHIIIIEEE!!!'

Marvin snickered, and he hummed as he pondered the decision to torture him further. Because have no doubt, there were many more spots on this poor hero that Marvin could exploit.....but, perhaps not today. Marvin was a kind-hearted soul, and he knew he would never forgive himself if he actually ended up driving Jackie insane. So.....his wiggling stopped. Jackie was already taking advantage and gulping in air like there was no tomorrow, and as Marvin removed his hands he leant closer to Jackie and purred soothingly.

'Awwww, I'm not a maaaajor meanie am I?'

As Jackie regained himself, he nibbled his lip and carried on blushing at their proximity. Marvin grinned and leant in to kiss him, softly and carefully; and the magician felt butterflies flutter in his own tummy when Jackie giggled into his lips. When they withdrew, Jackie mumbled with a bashful smile.

'I-I guehess nohohot.....'

Marvin grinned with satisfaction, and decide to switch their positions so that he could have the hero nestled into his chest whilst they both lay comfortably. Marvin went to reach for the remote.....but then he smirked one final time, and subtly whispered in Jackie's ear as the hero looked to him nervously.

'I may not be mean, but you still must beware......Marvin the Malicious could come back at any time.....'

Jackie squeaked and giggled as he buried his face in Marvin's chest, to which the latter didn't hesitate to ''aww'' at audibly. And they cuddled. For a while actually, as they un-paused their movie and let it play on. I could say that the rest of that movie continued without any giggly mishaps.....but would anyone really believe that?

HoPE U GUYS LIIIKED IITTT MMK LUV YOUS XD XX

[ebonetnoir]

LAUGHING IMP BOOKPLATES, Exclusively Designed and Handcrafted by Ebon et Noir Protect your treasured books with these whimsical bookplates featuring a cackling, impish little fiend. These bookplates are sure to delight little ones and adults alike. Bookplates are ideal for safeguarding the volumes in your library and make a unique and thoughtful gift. Bookplates are crafted on 50# White English Finish Gummed Paper and hand-cut to size. Gummed paper is coated with an adhesive backing that requires water to activate (similar to traditional stamps). Once the adhesive is activated, the paper will adhere to the front pastedown of your book.

$25, BUY ON ETSY

Historically, bookplates have been printed on gummed paper for a variety of reasons. First, the glue is water-soluble and can be removed by steaming or wetting without damaging your book. Second, gummed paper dries flat and without residue and eliminates the waste of sticker adhesive backings. Third, the finished bookplate has a refined look and feel. ITEM DETAILS • Dimensions: 4in x 3in, 10.16cm x 7.62cm • Substrate: 50# White English Finish Gummed Paper • Adhesive: Moisture/Water activated • Quantity: 30 Bookplates • Turn around time: 3-5 days • Each bookplate ships in a hardback envelope with instructions. • Each bookplate is handcrafted and cut to size and may vary slightly from the rest • Option to Personalize: Yes PERSONALIZATION These bookplates can be personalized with your name(s). You can choose either first name or both first and last names. The font used is an adjusted version of Diehl Deco Regular in all caps as shown in the photos. A maximum of 25 characters is allowed. INSTRUCTIONS/HOW-TO On a clean surface, moisten the back of the bookplate with a damp sponge. The bookplate will curl up a little, this is normal. Affix the moistened bookplate where desired, smoothing the paper from the center outwards to eliminate any creases and wrinkles. Gummed paper dries flat and smooth. I recommend you perform a test on a paper surface before applying to your book to get a feel for the moisture/glue. Don't moisten the front of the bookplate as inks are not waterproof. If you opted for blank bookplates, write your name in before applying. Store unused bookplates in a dark, dry place. SOME HISTORY A bookplate is sometimes called an ex-libris meaning “from the books of” in Latin. The earliest known example, dated to 1480, is the bookplate of Hilprand Brandenburg, a Carthusian monk. At first, most bookplates were designed to safeguard the property of nobles; thus, they were adorned with coats of arms and other indicators of inherited prestige. This was the case through the 18th century, though styles changed with artistic trends. The 19th century saw the rise of the middle class. Scholars, professionals, and other educated individuals became interested in bookplates and commissioned works in a pictorial vein. Since then, ex libris have been used to denote personal property, and as a form of personal expression. Since ex-libris stamps were generally never seen by the public, the artwork varied tremendously from intimate erotic scenes to darkly expressionistic styles. Thank you for supporting my small business.