#but like. it’s true
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because i needed the reminder today:
it is okay to adapt & improvise “normal” tasks to work for you. it is okay to break them into smaller steps. it is okay to take breaks. it is okay to approach in a “nonsensical” way.
if it works for you, and it isn’t hurting someone, breaking a law (caveat in tags), or going to lose you a job/get you kicked out of a school that you need (bend rules as far as they’ll bend, but don’t hurt yourself/your future in the process if you can avoid it), do that.
do what works for you.
yeah, do this for more complex tasks.
do your homework one question at a time if you can. use a premade sauce to make your favourite food if you don’t have the spoons to make it the “normal” way.
make the steps smaller and do them more frequently. take longer breaks in-between.
but i’m talking ‘simple’ tasks too.
wash every outfit the day you use it, as soon as you change. ¿is it more water? maybe. but you deserve clean clothes. if it’s difficult to remember or rely on your spoons/energy/physical limits to be able to wash things once a week or once a month, then adapt. find a way that works for you.
also, if you’re also recently discovered autistic &/or ADHD, or you’re newly physically/mentally disabled (or recent ish & still coming to terms with it), I see you.
it’s frustrating to simplify or give up on things you could’ve done before. it’s exhausting to find all the things you can’t do that you always could, especially if you never thought you would see a day you can’t do it.
you are still worthy of love and care. yes, even now. especially now.
(more personal examples & also direct comfort/reassurance below the cut)
i can’t do long staircases anymore. i used to love running up them, running or hopping down the steps. now I shakily take one step at a time, leaning heavily on a cane, and my ankles/knees still tremble and hurt. (i’m hypermobile & some of my connective tissue is deteriorating.)
i can’t read academic texts by myself anymore. there’s so many feelings about that, and it’s the most recent curve of acceptance.
i realized 3 or 4 days ago that the reason i’m falling behind on the readings for astronomy & human development (which I find fascinating) is because of the length of the readings. i keep up in sociology, but it’s smaller chapters & less reading, & I can usually skim for terms & catch enough info to participate in class. but in order to pass my classes, in order to succeed, that requires me to use a text-to-speech website or app, or to have a friend read for me.
for those who don’t know, i’m a creative writer. i write fiction and poems like it’s nothing. i also love the feel of a physical book. i’ve stayed in denial, thinking that i just need to break it into small chunks.
but i got a traumatic brain injury in November of 2019, that most affected my prefrontal cortex. i need that to focus, to self-regulate. i need it to read effectively, let alone long amounts of text.
i’ve stayed in denial about how bad that injury was, because i had enough to deal with due to everything else that nasty concussion did (shaking trauma memories loose, breaking masks & layers of amnesia within trauma disorders, breaking autism mask, severe emotional dysregulation i’m still recovering from).
but i can’t keep up with university classes if i keep trying to force myself to read the same way i did before. i need to use screen readers or text-to-speech, i need to rely on friends or family. i need to accept help.
and it sucks. it’s a terrifying loss of independence. it’s frustrating. there’s a lot of grief.
but this is my life now. i have to adapt.
all this to say, be gentle and kind with yourself. treat yourself the way you want to be treated. learn to tolerate yourself. (i would say ‘accept & love yourself’ but that’s its own learning curve.) adapt your space & your actions to match your current capabilities. prioritize completing self-care tasks, even if you don’t/can’t do it perfectly.
you deserve to, and can, accommodate yourself. the world around you may not be accessible, but as much as you’re able (to your degree of independence & financial limits/budgets), find ways to accommodate yourself.
and treat yourself once in a while. it doesn’t have to be expensive or difficult. sitting in your car (if you have one) in the lot of a nature park is better than never seeing trees. a poor-quality drawing is better than never drawing again. a cheap thrifted or dollar store plushy is better than no plushy. whatever it is you want to do or have, within your limits, do it your way. treat yourself to your favourite things if you can.
we weren’t put into this world to suffer. we weren’t put in this world to lose all our dreams.
we arrived to live. we arrived to have fun. we arrived to create. we arrived to play. we arrived to love (platonic, romantic, etc.). we arrived to dance and sing (even “badly”).
and maybe your disabilities steal some of these from you. but if you can find even one thing that makes it worth it, if you can make one thing accessible again....do it. make it happen. you deserve happiness and relief and love, especially now.
and if you don’t believe it right now, that’s okay. i’ll hold hope for you until you can. 💜
~Nico
#caveat#break the law if it isn’t harmful & you won’t get caught#just don’t put yourself at risk of misdemeanor/criminality if you can avoid it#this got away from me#but like. it’s true#and heartfelt#i love you all#even strangers. we’re alive together & that’s beautiful.#~Nico#disabled#trauma#disabilities#traumatic brain injury#long post
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It didn’t hit me until recently that people genuinely think Kamala Harris was a police officer because of all the people who call her a cop online.
Like I think maybe it’s important people should know she was a prosecutor. She was once a district attorney and later an attorney general for the state of California. And we can discuss how related that is to police work and how tied she is to the carceral system etc etc (but for fairness would have to include her record of pushing for lowering incarceration rates through programs helping former prisoners + her office refusing to jail folks for low level weed offense). But she was never a police officer. Like people should get that clear. Kamala Harris was never a police officer. She was a district attorney. She was never a police officer.
#Kamala Harris#us politics#like genuinely seeing people say she was an actual cop#that was never true#and it’s kind of embarrassing#like please her wiki page is right there
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local ladies man’s signature move totally useless against autistic monster enthusiast. more on Kabru’s fumble era at 6
#i’ve seen so many interpretations of that 1 hr freeze frame of Kabru’s smile in ep 16#he’s meeting his long time crush of course he’s trying to charm him#Kabru so obviously has a big fat giant crush on Laios#like atp in the story he’s tried to talk to him and get his attention so many times agjdjajdj#Laios is the human rubix cube he’s been searching for his entire life#everyone else is almost too easy for Kabru to pin down#Laios on the other hand … a treasure trove of autistic mystery#Kabru is so locked in#Kabru used signature move: charming smile#Laios: no effect!#there’s something so beautiful about the popular pretty boy entering his fumble era when his one true love turns out to be autistic#labru#laios touden#kabru of utaya#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#wasabi rambles#seen so many clock that smile as nefarious and machiavellian#baby no Kabru is just dialing the charm up to 100 and what we’re all feeling is second hand embarrassment LMAO
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There’s this guy in town who owns this little house, and a while back he rescued a street dog that was going to get put down. Turned out she was pregnant.
Problem is, he has mental health & drug issues and couldn’t afford to get them all spayed & neutered, so now there are 6 grown bitches with 15 puppies total, and they’ve dug under his fence in multiple places but he can’t afford to fix it so they go roaming all around town. (When I say can’t afford it, I mean his house is currently running on a generator because he can’t afford his electric bill.) He’s also a day laborer so he cannot take multiple full days off work to take them to the vet an hour away. He’s in a really rough spot.
He’s not a bad person. He’s just overwhelmed.
And this little conservative town with 6 churches for 300 people, have they tried to help their neighbor? Have they adopted the puppies he’s been trying to give away? Have they offered resources?
NOPE! All they wanna do is talk shit about him and complain about the dogs but never lift a finger of their own. And they come to his house to yell at him and cuss him out about the dogs, which does not exactly engender in him a cooperative attitude, as you might imagine.
So after a while of this going on, my mom gets fed up with all the NIMBY bullshit and starts talking to the guy, because she’s done animal rescue for 20-odd years and has Connections. He’s resistant at first, but when he realizes she’s not being an asshole to him on account of his addiction or the dogs, he decides to let her help.
She gets to work organizing and networking. Finds a non-profit that will cover vaccinations, spay/neuter, and flea treatments for all the dogs. Talks the next-door neighbor into paying for materials to fix the fence, since this guy can do the work of it himself. Gets him in touch with another non-profit that will adopt out the adult dogs.
Less than 2 weeks after she decided to do something, all puppies have been to the vet, 10 puppies and 4 adult dogs have been adopted out, and the second non-profit is coming by next week to pick up the remaining 7 dogs to ship them out for adoption.
I’ve learned a lot of things from my mom—some good, some bad—but I think the most important positive message she lives as an example of is this: sometimes, when something needs done and no one else is willing, you gotta stand up and say “I’ll do it.”
#dogs#animal rescue#liveblogging the texas hill country#pets#d’ye like dagss#true story#blog together queue alone
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My Mane 6 Redesigns all together! I was going to post them separately but ended up finishing them all before I got around to it lol
#mlp#my little pony friendship is magic#my little pony#mlp fim#mlp redesign#earth pony twilight truthers where are you#bat pony fluttershy truthers where are you#dark color palette rarity truthers where are you#ALL OF YOU RISE WITH ME#im ESPECIALLY an earth pony twilight truther ever since I saw the old G5 concepts#I love the idea that Twilight's bonds with others are her true magic rather than beams or spells and I feel earth pony twi fits that well#since “the five elements brought together creates the sixth element magic“ aka friendship since FIM she embodies ”magic“ in a#more metaphorical sense#the star in her eyes is also a reference to the first ep when twilight says “the spark” ignited inside of her heart#plus the earth pony to alicorn pipeline is so cool and i like the idea of an earth pony being the bearer of the element of magic as a#fun contrast/its unexpected
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So usually when an imaginary friend is a real thing in a story, it’s either a demon or a ghost or some supernatural boogeyman that probably wants to eat the kid they’ve befriended (Mama, a couple of the Paranormal Activity movies), or “imaginary friends” are just treated as a real thing in the setting, and if a child just thinks hard enough they can manifest a friend into existence (Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends, Happy).
And somewhere in the middle is an area where the imaginary friend in question is real and they are supernatural, but they aren’t malevolent, and they aren’t entirely honest about what they are. Like maybe they’re a fairy or a god or some kind of boggle from mythology, but they just got caught by a six year old and they don’t have time to get into it, so they just go “…Yes. I’m your imaginary friend. We haven’t met. How do you do.” And then they stick around because they do love this kid, and if you’re a boggle from mythology in the modern day good food is really hard to come by.
And at some level. That’s what I think Hobbes is.
#imaginary friends#calvin and hobbes#hobbes lives in some kind of level of existence calvin isn’t aware of#but fundamentally calvin doesn’t seem to care#to calvin hobbes is a particularly well spoken and occasionally insufferable friend who happens to be shaped like a tiger#and who he loves to the very bottom of his soul#all of which is true and so hobbes isn’t in a rush to correct him#10k#20k#30k
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WE'RE SO BACK
#tim drake#nightwing#dick grayson#hey this took under 7 hours to do and that was so much faster than the last attempt. that other tim drake one with cleaner lines took me#days to finish and i was coloring it like that one white boy with pulsing veins on his forehead. i was watching one video about how the#thing stopping you from creating is being too obsessed with perfectionism and this is true. we must go forward. GO FORTH. CREATE.#EMBRACE FLAWS AND ACCEPT THAT SOMETIMES IT MAY LOOK ASS. I wouldve been happier with more frames between it but it is a sunday.#M-F employed people you know that means no staying up til 3 am doing little projects because it will mess u up so bad. finished before 12
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*I worship you Tumblr please don’t remove it
傳達不到的一些東西
Dumb school girl crush
#I know a lot of people say Marcille is down bad#which is true#but it feels like she’s intentionally trying to view Falin is a child#even though she was also just a teen/kid when they first met#and Falin always protests but fell silent immediately#it’s just… interesting#dungeon meshi#farcille#falin touden#marcille donato
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr#warm up#idk . having trouble writing rn#ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum#i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for#i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography#like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days#furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will#actually ever happen#ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum
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how it feels to use the word diegetic
#sorry i like talking about diegesis even though theres like a dozen more common words to use instead.#avpost#yeah i know about the arts i guess you could call me a true scholar of film 🤓
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hey um queer desi people if you think you're alone, i promise you're not. i'm here, we're here, and we exist. i love you.
#desiblr#lgbtqia#desi queer#queer poc#you are not alone okay?#it's going to feel like it#more often than it should#but it's not true#weirdly specific but ok#asmi#maggots
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William is the most divorced man in the FNAF universe
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#michael afton#william afton#ballora#fnaf sister location#fnaf 4#been a bit since I’ve done an unserious comic#I actually just really wanted to draw Ballora again ngl#William Afton is the most divorced man in that fnaf universe#not saying it actually went like this or anything#BUT THE IDEA William out of him missing his wife#makes ballora to basically belittle him for his failures#IS so funny and plankton coded that I just wanna believe it’s true#and the idea on top of all that Michael is there#like Michael is the one who stays with William the longest#I can only imagine the horrors he has witnessed#of his dad just missing his wife and Henry etc#men will make robot wife before going to therapy
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if viktor was a worm jayce would build the most beautiful enclosure for him and would spend all his free time staring at him and feeding him leaves and i think this is deeply devastating. he loves him in the purest of ways and the affection was NEVER one sided jayce and viktor always loved each other and they always will to some extent
#jayvik#jayce talis#viktor arcane#arcane spoilers#viktor the machine herald#arcane#like. even should viktor never go back to his true self. the version of him that was fully himself loved jayce and forever will#they are so dear to me
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#fresh memes#memes#savage memes#lol#memesdaily#meme#savage#dank memes#funny memes#funny#omg#best memes#no chill memes#no chill#relatable memes#relatable#comedy#hilarious#true memes#it be like that sometimes
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“A thousand generations serve to praise…”
#listening to the 1996 ending and getting emotional at the last line#thinkin bout how even literally thousands of generations later we’re still making new adaptations of this guy#and still talking about everyone’s favorite lil monkey guy#and after all - isn’t that true immortality?#sun wukong#jttw sun wukong#journey to the west 1986#journey to the west 1996#havoc in heaven#monkey king#monkey king reborn#lego monkie kid#lmk sun wukong#lmk fanart#digital art#my art#journey to the west#I’ve been wanting to make a piece like this for a while#thank god for the symmetry tool…#I’ve been really locked into work lately so this was a relaxation piece#my only regret is that I didn’t have enough stamina to shade it#but I still like the vibrant colors a lot so it’s cool 👍#I ordered it by timeline#some of my favorite Wukongs :)
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