#but ive done it at least a couple other times
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Truly stunning how good Luca is at playing Guys With Something Wrong With Them.
true!! i imagine playing Guys With Something Wrong With Them is somewhat more compelling than Average Normal Well-Adjusted Guy. and also more difficult lending itself to a more interesting performance. i say as someone who has 0 acting experience. but it's about the Diversity of Guys With Something Wrong With Them.
take villainous roles only. fabio's dramatic and flamboyant and obsessed with fame and the manifestation of what's Wrong With Him is a lot of screaming and dancing and also mass murder plots. and violent killing. diabolik, in contrast, is a guy who was very evidently raised around a bunch of criminals until the age of 22 and therefore has 0 social skills. and also likes crime and killing. what's Wrong With Him is much more subtle but still very clear. and primo is. well. primo. his problem is everything (been a while since i watched trust but specifically power and ambition and all that). guess what? also kills! but can act nice when he wants and violent when he wants. a real enigma of a Guy With Something Wrong With Him.
and yet? all the Same Guy. same actor. without even getting into like, paolo il padre d'italia, which is another one of my favourite performances of his for personal reasons. and other more restrained dramatic roles. for my top 2 compare martin martin eden to pietro le otto montagne and they are both super different from each other AND paolo. and again even though i know in theory they're played by famous actor luca marinelli whenever i see the movie i am less like 'wow that's famous actor luca marinelli' and more like 'wow that's my good friend pietro le otto montagne'. which is not true for all actors. super diverse range of roles super skilled actor very good at his job. oscar when
#and yeah like all of this is Acting. which is the job. but some actors i think fall into similar archetypes in a lot of their roles#it takes a lot of skill to be able to play that many different people and do all of them well#like i dont think hes done a bad job in anything yet. not that ive seen all his stuff but as a diabolik 2021 defender til the day i die#he's literally never missed. you know#and now the mussolini series!! sky get your shit together and get your advertising and emmy campaign going#im so serious. you've got the pride and prejudice guy. limited series category RIGHT now.#starting my campaign today.#(i say all this with 100% confidence like i know shit about acting. i don't i know little. my qualifications are Likes Movies A Healthy#Amount and my part time acting as line reader for my brother but always reading them in the least helpful way possible)#neon answers#materassassino#like there are a couple other actors i can think of who can pull this off!! and don't get me wrong a lot of people are very good at it!!#but the thing i keep coming back to is the sheer range. you know how it is. drama action comedy comic book adaptation etc#villains heroes whatever. crazy stuff
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[ID copied from alt text: A full body digital drawing of my OC Petrichor (she/her), also known as Petra, set against a light purple background with lighter purple fish scale patterning. Petra is a young, chubby Water Genasi with wavy, water-like blue hair with vibrant green bangs, purple eyes with black sclera, and bright teal lightning streaks scattered across her body. She is wearing a dark purple corset top with detached matching collar and sleeves, as well as a gradient dark cloud skirt streaked with lightning, purple flats, silver rimmed glasses with blue tinted glass, and a silver floral holy symbol with a staff at its center. She is stood in three quarters profile, facing to the left but looking to the right. She has her head slightly cocked and is smiling. End description.]
My newest baby girl! Been wanting to get out more and found out that my local library holds a D&D campaign once a month so I made this lovely little Tempest cleric (and secret Swashbuckler rogue) for the game!
#Eli's Art#LibD&D#i think thatll be my tag for it for now lol#Petrichor#she's baby 💙#she's very nervous cause she's currently on the run from some pirates she kinda fucked over#but i think that may be the least of her concerns rn#cause we had session 1 yesterday and we ended the session in hell! fun!!#im so excited for this campaign#everyone was super sweet and it was cool getting to play in person#which ive only done a handful of times#our DM had props! it was v cool#cant wait for next month 🥰#expect a couple other pieces of her before theb#*then#one will be fancy dress cause the session was at a masquerade ball#and i think i also wanna do her old pirate outfit#might change her design here and there wanna play around with it
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for like 3 weeks i was wondering why i was sleeping so much and felt listless. and just now I managed to email 3 people and responded to a month old message in the span of an hour because I got back to TAKING MY FUCKIN MEDS..........
#MOTHER FFFFUCKER#to be fair. my doc said I could stop taking them while im on break since i wouldnt need to be constantly pumped on stimulants#im not sure if it was a side effect but i managed to take like 3 different naps in one day and STILL managed to sleep thru the whole night#at least 2 days into my break. the weird thing is i didnt feel more or less rested afterwards. but mentally i think im in a good place rn#to really put the level of awakeness im at rn i feel weirdly confident i could start one piece. also bc of that sick new opening it BANGS#the song is really good and im in love with the animation style. did some digging and it seems one of the lead animators is masato mori#but i could be wrong. it seems he also did some work on mp100 which could explain a lot lol.. he uses smear frames really well to convey#consistent movement and fluidity!!! someone else might have done color design but it works really really well esp with odas style!!#just love the overall vibe and aesthetic and id really love to study it and incorporate a bit of it into my art.. especially the thick#outlines which i think helps to separate characters and objects on screen. though i have to say the style is definitely more suited to#animation bc of the simpleness and smears. maybe that will help me explore shapes and perspective when i draw... i wanna get better#at drawing poses and angles but i have a hard time wrapping my head around space and using perspective guide lines NGHHHH#i wonder if it has to do with my dogshit ability to judge distance. not depth perception but like. judge how far smth is in metres etc#im also wearing an N95 for the first couple weeks back bc of the wave. absolutely NO BODY is wearing a mask its so fucking over#where im sitting ive heard 5 different people coughing probably not into their elbows!!! and im just. head in my fucking hands#there was a kid sitting a couple seats away in class coughing as he pleases and i wanted to grab him in a chokehold so badly. PLEASEE#ive been annoying my family by asking them to mask up and reminding them to bring masks when they go out and showing them news articles#but at least its working bc we ordered some KN95s and my mom is at least taking me seriously so. please dont be afraid to speak up abt your#health. take care of yourself and others however u can!! wear that mask indoors at your maskless friends house!!! stay home when u can!!#im wearing a surgical mask at home too bc my parents have '''a dry throat cough''' and they are so bad at coughing into their sleeves#also im pretty sure dry throat isnt transmissible bc my brother started coughing too so.. i also tested negative but they havent tested yet#im also not a doctor but i have to keep reminding ppl whenever i can that covid and flu work differently. covid is new and too recent to#have nearly as much research done on it. it seems its also compounding so instead of building immunity it weakens the body and spreads to#to other systems which might explain brain fog and muscle weakness. i remember someone early in the pandemic got infected and it messed up#their smell/taste receptors so bad that they cant eat most foods and that stays in the front of my mind when i think abt covid. christ#yapping
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reread a bunch of idw for my own nefarious purposes and i only came here to look up one specific thing but ohhhhh baby.
they just hand this shit right to me man. silver platter.
#'splendid' indeed. i am COOKINGGGGGGG#in my head at least. god knows how long any of this'll take to come to fruition‚ if at all#dont ever get interested in shit i say ill do until ive done it 'cause im great at abandoning anything that takes more than 2 days#and these are UH. quite a bit more ambitious than anything ive messed with in the past#n the writing has been...very daunting and a lot less clear-cut than i'd prefer. but. i do want it to happen. on GOD i want it to happen#my time with pizza has taught me that i AM capable of spending a couple months at a time on one project/comic#even if again those were FAR more simple...but should i get things properly figured out i do welcome a challenge.#so we'll see. we'll see.#sonicposting#but anyway christ yeah this is the biggest 'holy shit that is so FREE' bit i came across#but i found like 4 other completely unrelated things i can directly pull. steepling my fingers evilly.
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oh btw update on klapolly tsums project, I did actually start gathering materials for it (there's spring sales at craft stores rn >:] ) however I am now struggling to find skin (fleece) for them 😔
#i got some fleece#almost all the felt i need (forgot to grab red and purple though. for some reason skdhdkdjdj)#i actually got old shirts from a thrift store for more fabrics to use#(felt bad abt buying them just to cut them into tiny reactangles but ppl have done worse gentrification shit ig)#theres a couple other stuff i gotta get but its not immediate#esp since i need to first make a sewing pattern for everything#i did track down an online sewing pattern im taking notes from for developing my own#im thinking i want to actually. release the klapolly tsum sewing pattern when im done 👉👈#for free of course i dont want to make ppl spend even more money when getting the fabric is already costly akdjfkfkfkkf#though idk ive never done anything like that before#I'll try the best i can to make these patterns though#OH YEAH THE SKIN FLEECE I WAS GONNA TALK ABT THAT. SORRY GOT SIDETRACKED#u see this is where its hard bc i need felt and fleece that matches in color but im having . a hard time doing that <:] ...#which i knew was going to be a problem at the start#AND IM SCARED !!!! i was almsot considering having to polly lighter toned just to get some colors close enough#but i want to stand firm on polly not being super pale I REFUSE TO MAKE HIM SO WHITE !!!#at least klav would have his darker skin tone either way ig.... preferably i want them both to not be pale tho#rando thoughtz
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Blah blah blah I'm a sham blah blah blah terrible person blah blah blah. You've heard all this before so let's just pretend that I've apologized and made promises to be better only to break that promise like next week knowing me. We're all in agreement then? Perfect. Let's just continue then shall we!
That being said, while I would love to do nothing more than share some writing with you all...yeah I ain't got none of that 😅 Ran into a problem like a month ago called 'I decided to watch the owl house and now I'm once again in a new hyperfixation that I've been trying to fight off and have been failing miserably at'. While unlike ud it hasn't inspired me creatively as of yet, it has inspired in me an insatiable need to absorb literally ever bit of fanart and fanfic ever done, and seeing as that fandom is just slightly bigger than until dawn's, it has meant that that's literally all I've been doing the past months oops. So writing has kinda sorta been on the backburner for me sorry 😔 Hell, I only finally just got back the urge to start sewing again just this past week!
And while I would love to say that writing should hopefully pick back up in the near future, just the fact that I apparently have to move AGAIN in the next couple of weeks to a month means its probably not gonna happen 😒
Anyways, seeing as I've at least been able to start doing at least *one* thing creatively again, here's a cross stitch update woo! Except this time you can see what the front of the that pic of the back I shared a couple of hours ago looks like lol.
#wip wednesday#cross stitching#god i am so done with moving#change is terrible and moving is the worst change of all#hopefully once i find a new place and move in i'll actually be able to stay there for more than a couple of years#already know that when i inform my parents that i had to move again so my address changed again#that my dads gonna start on about staying in one place for more than a couple of years#as any of this is stuff i wanted#i would love to do nothing more than just rent on place for like 5+ years!#but when your previous landlord decides that he wants to sell the condo your renting#and then your roommates deciding that they want to move to another city entirely a couple of years later#i really don't have much of a choice in the matter you know?#the upside to this at least is that my job pays enough that i'll be able to get a place all on my own i guess?#means that i'll be able to actually be able to take everything that i own out of my room and spread it around finally#cause im way too self conscious and worried that i'm just shoving my interests in other peoples faces#even the people that ive lived with for the past like almost 5 years and they *know* what my interests are#same reason that this is the first time i've mentioned that i got into toh#cause i don't want to bother you guys with shit that i know almost none of you have interest in lol
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Ignore
#delete later#as awful as the past couple of weeks have been in terms of intrusive thoughts and random waves of panic and intense emotions and#blankness. there have also been random patches that have been. okay. and that is how i know my medication is working#bc the times ive been like this and not medicated? there has been no reprieve#like although i feel. awful and useless and am internalising my work failures in a non helpful way that im trying to fight#i am having moments of#hey we're okay. they raised an issue in a way that was gentle bc youre a good employee usually. and honestly although you#feel terrible for fucking up. someone you care about very much died a month ago. you have been experiencing a mental health#almost crisis (i refuse to call it a full crisis bc im not self destructing really badly) and quite frankly the fact that you're functioning#at all is. pretty decent. youre trying. i am of course having moments where im convinced that they hate me and want to fire me immediately#but that has no evidence. and the fact that i know it has no evidence is a pretty insane piece of progress#shout out to my therapist from two courses ago who drilled the moral shit into my head.#she genuinly helped me a lot with this.#also was really really hoping for the usual christmas bonus this year bc my finances are tighter than usual but the company had a#lean year so no bonuses for anyone. so dont have the leeway to try out sliding scale therapy for a while. but it is what it is.#this will pass. its just been a rough four months and i havent had a break. ive also been waiting fir thr other shoe to drop at work#and it finally has so i can at least stop torturing myself over maybes. im getting my meds. i can refer myself to nhs depression#therapy. which will be mostly useless and the same as it always is but it tends to help me feel like im trying to progress which is still#helpful in some small way. it will be what it will be. one day at a time and all that jazz#this is also how these things go for me. i lose it slowly over a month or so. have a horrific couple weeks until a day of a genuine#full breakdown. i survive that day and the day after and then slowly start clawing myself up again. ive just had a few breakdown#days this time. what can ya do. is what it is. im sure I'll have another breakdown soon as i can tell im not done crying#and will almost certainly have a breakdown at my parents bc i am not good at hiding the dead eyed look and mum will#definitely clock im being weirder than usual with food and touching things. so there'll be a#anyway nevermind. ill do what i must
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There's smth rly fun abt having stories based off of dreams because you just have a bunch of dream based worldbuilding that you just sorta have to work with now. Like oh a ring of infinite dragons run through the earth eternally consuming eachother? Guess I have to explain that now. Also that's sick as hell why didn't I think of that while awake
#rat rambles#oc posting#that damn dream story has captivated me deeply every since Ive had it even if I havent rly done much with it#I have been brainstorming some stuff relating the worldbuilding today tho#mostly what the actual deals of two main characters are#aka grim and the unnamed doggy#because Ive taken stabs at explaining them a couple times but have never rly landed on anything I rly care for#and theyre like The reason this dream stuck with me so hard so that is important#long story short theyre both god created beings that have been in a eternal brawl for what for them has been about 5 years for them#externally its been much much longer since anytime one of them successfully defeats the other they both go dormant for abt 50 years#they dont feel any of that bonus time tho so for them theyve been at this for ages with little to no break#grim usually wins since she was specifically trained to be the victor of the two everytime#but she isnt guaranteed a win by any means and has lost at least once#she likes to not think abt those times tho and pretend they never happened because if she acknowledged them then shed have to think through#the implications of that and she does not have the emotional or mental stability to be able to handle that#shes like. 16 to be clear.#the dog is about 21 or so Id say? Im still figuring things out so idk for sure yet#the basic premise of the story is that after so long of fighting they've both been gradually getting weaker and more exhausted each time#and after one iteration where they were both fighting high in the sky the two in the next iteration find themselves fallen very far apart#grim spends the story trying to find the dog and accidentally getting adopted along the way#and the dog ends up allowing some children to take them home so they can hide and recover and they end up getting attached#it's mostly just abt the two learning to exist as individuals and not weapons and finally beginning to process the trauma this whole cycle#has left them with and eventually breaking the cycle and chosing to stay with their respective new families#this was all stuff that was actually like in the dream which is why it stuck with me so hard but also that dream was mean to me for#dropping all of that and only giving one character a name. god.#tbf its kind of made up for by it being in like the coolest scene in the dream since it was grim naming herself that while talking to the#dog at the end since she had been referred to as a grim reaper or as just a reaper in the dream before that point so it was like a moment#of defiance and also claiming an identity for herself that wasnt just her title#shes a silly billy she also has a scythe that can shoot lasers
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Hey, could i get someone to do me a favour please?
Just, send me an ask or reply to this post or something and tell me to kick my ass into gear (or however else you'd prefer to tell me to Do The Things, phrasing doesnt matter lol)
For context: im joining what amounts to my first real D&D campain on monday, and i still haven't made my character 🙃
basically the problem is that im SUPER excited but that excitement means more anxiety and the lump of meat i call a brain has noticed that trying to work on my character causes anxiety, so now every time i even try to think about it i hit a wall of executive disfunction WHICH JUST GIVES ME MORE ANXIETY ABOUT IT AAAAAAAAAAAA
Anyways.
TLDR: i have Things I Need To Do, but the executive disfunction is hitting HARD rn and i could use some encouragement from anyone who's up for it
#please help i haven't done anything even remotely productive today#didnt even get out of bed till about 2:30 pm#dnd#d&d#dungeons and dragons#a little bonus venting for those who want it (cause i cant NOT elaborate if given the chance):#also like. okay so the ĺast time i joined ANYTHING at all in the physical world without at least one family member right there beside me was#when i volunteered in an understaffed kitchen for a week a couple years ago and i still had a close family friend with me the entire time#before that? the swim team in THIRD GRADE (8-9 yrs old)#and tbh even then my mum was usually THERE she was just sitting on the bleachers rather than in the water#and like. im in my lower TWENTIES now#wich i know is still quite young#but its still been a fuckin WHILE (debatably my entire life!) since ive done anything on my own#also i only met the DM last saturday and ive never met any of the other players!#also also the DM? technically works for my mom.#like okay he's a couple rungs below her so they dont interact very often afaik but it still seems at least a little weird#or maybe thats just my anxiety that is very possible
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this assay is so fucking fake......
#same one ive been working on for like 3 months. every other assay ive trained on took me a couple goes to get but ive done this one ~45x#and i keep getting 2 good runs and then 1 fail. which SUCKS bc i need 3 passes in a row to sign off on it#and its so sensitive that changing even tiny things like using a different brand same volume beaker. or a 0.5cm longer flea#anyway i had another 2 good runs this week so this was my 3rd but bc its a friday afternoon im tired as fuck and keep making dumb mistakes#like overstirring it + one of my samples leaked which is soooo embarrassing bc ive already had to ask for more before bc its taken me-#almost 50 fucking attempts already#anyway. hour and a half into prep and im at the most crucial time sensitive part which is pipetting thr enzyme into the substrate#and i manage to do it all w even time spacing (u have to replicate the exact same pace at the end of the timer or it doesnt work)#and then realise id picked up a different identical model pipette that was set to half the volume i was meant to put in FUUUUCK#by that point i was like fuck it im almost 2 hours in and nothing else to do the rest of the day. so ill work around it + see what happens#i figured well its half the volume. so if i add the same half volume again at the 5 minute mark and leave it for 12.5 instead of 10 mins#then itll hydrolyse the substrate to the same degree. IN THEORY in practice this stuff never works bc of error margins etc#bearing in mind this js like 30 seconds of thought bc it took me a couple mins to realise what i did#but the thing abt working in a lab is u make these split second decisions constantly bc everything is so time sensitive#so u have to be quick thinking on ur feet#anyway long story short got to the end of the 3 hour process. which i was carrying out v sloppily bc the chances of it working were-#slim by that point lmao. but lo and behold it was completely fucking fine. all cvs less than 5% and averages <5% of spec#which is awesome bc it means after THREE MONTHS and like. 45x3 whats that AT LEAST 135 HOURS OF FOCUSED TIME ON IT#not counting attempts i gave up on halfway thru bc id alreaady fucked them up bad#i can FINALLY sign off on it lmfao. but im just so mad like why does it play these mind games with me. it shouldnt have worked#whatever chemistry is such a fickle stupid science. anyway wahoo weekend time baby#gorgeous weather here + im gonna get pizza on the way home...... maybe life doesnt suck sometimes 😇#mutuals if ur still at work stay strong soldiers#.diaries
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365 Days of Writing Prompts: Day 258
Adjective: Scattered
Noun: World
Definitions for those who need/want them:
Scattered: occurring or found at intervals or various locations rather than all together; (informal) (of a person) distracted or disorganized; (physics) (of electromagnetic radiation or particles) deflected or diffused
World: the earth, together with all of its countries, peoples, and natural features; all of the people, societies, and institutions on the earth; denoting one of the most important or influential people or things of its class; another planet like the earth; the material universe or all that exists, or everything; a region or group of countries; a particular period of history; a group of living things; the people, places, and activities to do with a particular thing; a person's life and activities; human and social interaction; secular interests and affairs; a stage of human life, either mortal or after death
#today was rather busy#work was kind of a lot but everything seems to have turned out okay#and im taking some time off tomorrow (sadly not the whole day tho) which is definitely needed#and ive been working on an art piece tonight#i havent done art in the past couple of weeks so im glad im doing another piece#as for this prompt i like the ways it can be interpreted#is the 'world' 'scattered' because it is literally fragmented into pieces#or because the people of the 'world' are separated from each other#or because the people of the 'world' are 'scattered' across other 'worlds'#i honestly like all of these options and i may try to find a way to make them all fit together in a single poem#thanks for reading#writing#writer#creative writing#writing prompt#writeblr#trying to be a writeblr at least
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opened my doc for HWC to make some character changes and there's...an entire chapter-by-chapter outline for the book?? when tf did i do that??? i literally have only done that much outlining for stories that i am currently/plan on writing soon and HWC was never intended to be high on my priority list
#my original stories#os: handle with care (fragile)#i literally do not remember writing this out at all#i mean. its pretty good tho#gotta take a couple big chapters out bc they wont fit the changes im making to the main trio#but damn ig? at least i'll be ready to hit the ground running when i DO want to work on that story#also like i cant figure out why id latch onto it enough to write that#bc the only other times ive done that have been w/ stories/characters that i HEAVILY relate to#and that doesnt quite fit this story? like themes of recovery/growth are big for me bc it helps me w my own trauma#but everything else doesnt really apply to me as a person
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The Four Times You Say His Full Name
Am I any good at writing? Not really. It's all over the place in my opinion, but I had to get this thought out one way or another.
The four times you called him by his full name.
This first time you called him "Kenji" instead of a nickname, was back in LA. You were working a wedding up in Griffith Park, a beautiful little affair under the strawberry moon. It's all the witchy vibes you adore, a little wedding mixed with a baby shower, good vibes, blessings and tides. They'd offered you some food, which you wouldn't turn down as a known foodie, and that was when you got the call.
Ken had been riding home from the party in the hills and crashed his bike. He wasn't too far from Griffith, that had been the good part of taking this job, and he's been taken to Silver lake, a quick drive from the park. The couple is understanding, eventually becoming good friends with her later on, but that's a story for another time. She's racing through the streets, down the hills and to the hospital. They hadn't given you much information, just that he'd crashed and where he was. And when you get there, you ask the charge nurse for him, only to feel his arms throw themselves around your shoulders, a slightly pointed chin resting atop your head. You immediately smell the alcohol, and it's almost instant that a rage fills your chest.
"Babe! Baby! Sweetcakes~"
It takes everything, and you mean everything, not to implode then and there. You look at the nurse in front of you and take small controlled breaths.
"Is he free to go home?"
He was, having been checked over and kept under observation for two hours before they called her. According to her it's just some bad scrapes and bruises, no contusions or anything super bad, he had actually been wearing his helmet at least, just not his jacket. His bike is totaled, helmet cracked, it really is surprising that he didn't have a concussion at the very least, but through even your anger and worry, you're glad he's ok.
You drive him home, and the way there is silent. He'd sensed something was up the way you were being so cold with him, pushing his hand off your thigh, turning your head when he tried to kiss your lips, avoiding eye contact with you. And when you guys get to your shared home, and you help him in, is it the only time since the hospital that you look him in the eyes.
He sees it immediately. That rage that's practically sobering for him. The hurt. Disappointment.
It's not the only time he's ever done this, and he's not particularly tempted to tell you those two words he just knows would just set you off even if it were true.
"Mina, emergency vital check."
The floating AI robot scans him as she stands there for a moment, looking over him herself. The tension so palpable, if she chose to raise a hand at him in her frustration, she could very well slap him with it. But that wasn't her. She was the sweetest thing, practically a Disney princess, so the anger in her eyes is surprising, and new.
"He has two deep road rash injuries, and a large scrape down his side that isn't as bad as the other two. No fractures and no concussion. I suggest monitoring for any latent signs."
"Get him hooked up to a banana bag, then look up flights to Japan."
He shouldn't try to joke, or anything, but the soft scoff leaves his lips before he could stop it.
"Japan? We goin-"
"We, are not going anywhere. I'm going home to see my dad. Maybe we'll talk. Maybe we won't."
His small smile falls, a slight wince given when the IV is put in.
"Is something...is he ok?"
You shoot him a look because you know he's smart enough to understand what you were saying. You didn't want to say it, but you were done. With the empty promises, the lies, the hospital visits. You were done with it.
"Sabine-"
"Kenji, I'm done, ok? I've had it."
And there it is. He thought his parents splitting up was the worst pain, but seeing you stand at the doorway, teary eyed in anger and barely breathing steady, it shatters his heart because he can see it. You are done.
"I only ever asked you for two things. Two. And I am grateful you can at least follow one. I'll give you that, you have never cheated on me and I thank you for that. But if you constantly break this one? Constantly do this shit? How do I know that'll last?"
"H-hey, hold on-"
"No, I am done. I love you. I love your mom. You two are...the only people I consider myself close to here, but I cannot deal with this anymore. I can't deal with thinking one day I'm gonna get a call and have to identify your corpse instead of picking you up from an ER."
"It's just a couple scratches, I'm fine-"
He's done it now. He's said it.
"Forget it."
She grabs her wallet, and just her wallet. It's the only thing in her bag that she's bought herself as her bag had been a gift from him. She heads out and he tries to follow her, not able to get to her before she's speeding out of the driveway. She feels like a hypocrite, because while she isn't drunk, she is speeding like she's a NASCAR driver, and in a residential no less. She doesn't care to look at the time when she arrives at the airport, hoping to find at least one flight outbound to Japan soon. The car can stay in the parking structure for all she cares at this point, he would get a call to pick it up at the end of the month, if she decides not to come back. Her phone vibrates incessantly in her pocket for a bit, even as she's paying for the ticket she's managed to snag so last minute. Her passport is always in her wallet, so she doesn't particularly worry about how she'd get there without it. She turns her phone off, and soon enough, she's on the plane, watching LAX turn into a massive black splotch with dozens of tiny lights speckled across it in almost neat lines, as the plane departs. She's glad for the little privacy her seat offers her in first class. It's a long flight, the seats recline into a bed and everyone has their headphones on, so she isn't particularly worried that they'll hear her already quiet broken sobs.
By the end of the month, your mind is made up. You'd started accepting his calls sometime in the middle of his season. You know you shouldn't have been watching the games, it would only make the hurt worse, but it was better than ignoring him completely. And that wasn't really possible when you get notifications about him on all your social media, all which say he's in a slump and you are nowhere to be seen at his games. Everyday since you'd left, there had been a voicemail. Apologies, checking in messages, more apologies, declarations of love, and to your utmost surprise, a recording of his introduction at an AA meeting. That one particularly stuck with her. Everyday, roughly at 8 pm, a call and a voicemail with his introduction.
Maybe that was why you started taking his calls. Maybe that was why his game was getting better, back to what he usually is at. His averages get better and you, for the most part, find your anger having dissipated. By the end of the month, you're hesitantly standing in his living room as he tries to clean up the bit of clutter he had around. His shirt rides up a little and you see it. The slight scarring from the massive scrape down his side. Your lips quivers and he stops completely, dead in his tracks. He's startled by the sight of those huge wet tears that build in your eyes and his arms are around you instantly, tightly wound to prove he was ok. That he was still there. He was safe.
You cry again that night, held in his arms. He misses the game the next day. He has his thirty day chip to show you after all, and he doesn't want to leave your side to make up for lost time. He swears a promise not to do it ever again. Drink and ride he means. He isn't an alcoholic, and the AA meetings were necessary to get his license back, but he wanted her to see he regretted his decisions wholeheartedly.
The second time you said his full name was at your wedding. A year from the date he proposed to you, rather clichely you'd admit, at your monthly trip to Disneyland. The team had won a game, they were given a PR trip to Disneyland and she was an annual pass holder. She met them there, and during the cavalcade with them, he stepped off as they got to the castle, where she stood watching, and he popped the question, on one knee with a simple little ring she had spotted in a jewelry store. The team, having been in on it, cheering them on when she tearfully said yes.
Now she stands at the alter, in a gorgeous dress that fits her like a glove, his mother as her maid of Honor, and her dad as his best man because let's be honest, he thought of him as a son at this point, the way his mom thought of her as her own daughter in the time they'd all known each other, and the ceremony is relatively small, less than fifty guests, very intimate.
It's during her vows, her promises to him and vice versa that she says it. Beautifully charming smile on those lovely glossy lips of hers.
"I, Sabine Baji, take you, Kenji Sato, as my husband. Through sickness and in health, through the good times and the bad, till death do us part."
It's the sweet and short of her vows, tearfully said as her emotions run rampant. The rest of the night spent energetically celebrating.
The third time is a little more...non PG.
It's off season, he's been training here and there, enjoying some time off in their big house up in the hills. She's spending the weekend babysitting between gigs and she's been...quiet. Maybe it was the fact that she was around them so often. Maybe, it was the fact that her friends just had a little one she was watching currently, that clung to her so jealously when Kenji came around for a cuddle too. Maybe she was ovulating. The exact cause of this scenario was a blur to her really. She just recalled, well, he recalled and told her it was how it went down. Swears by it that she, as the family was driving away with the baby, fast asleep curled up in a hoodie it wouldn't let go or give back, that she looked up at him and said it.
"Kenji." It's the first time in a long time that she says his name, so he worries maybe he did something wrong again without noticing, but the look in your eyes in determined, is heated...pleading. "I want a baby."
The night didn't end for you two there. You both lost count somewhere after three, overstimulated and yet continuing like bunnies in heat. You blame the baby fever, and maybe the wine during lunch, but the venture is fruitful two months later, when four pink lines, two on each stick, and the word 'Pregnant' in bold on the digital test are laid before you two on the bathroom counter.
The same counter he would quickly have you laying against as he spread your thighs open wider, held you closer, got a little rougher with his thrusts, aiming to make the baby in you twins, according to him. Something not fruitful, unfortunately for him, but enjoyable at least.
And that takes us to the fourth and perhaps not final time you ever say his name.
Seven months later, you feel like a ship. The little peanut, you two so kindly nicknamed the baby while looking for a name, kicking around, shifting about, giving you some of the most ravenous cravings you'd ever had. Braxton Hicks, you came to be brutally informed of when waking in the middle of the night in a labor scare, had finally died off.
Or so you had thought.
When the first stab of pain shot through your side, you'd simply grimaced and sighed, shifting on the couch during the somewhat humid autumn day. You had decided to stay the Halloween weekend in, instead of going to a party while you felt like a boat. Kenji immediately notes the discomfort and tries to help.
"You want your little heart ice pack?"
You shake your head, yawning softly because yeah, it hurt, but you were too tired. You just wanted to go to sleep already.
"Ngh...no...just wanna go sleep already...come with me?"
How could he say no? He takes your hand when you ask for help getting up, and you both feel it. The sudden rush of water on your legs, his slippers. Your face is beet red and he's confused for all of two seconds before he's scrambling for the "go" bag. A Dodger duffle bag that the team's wives/significant others had decorated for them. He'd filled it with extra clothes for them, babies first outfits, washed in baby detergent, and a picture of his mom and her dad, both who couldn't be there today. You groan in annoyance because that was your favorite rug now covered in amniotic fluid, and now you would probably stain the carseats because you were not about to try and change your pants in active labor.
(Kenji had that covered, gingerly pulling your panties and pants off and helping you out new ones on, after cleaning you up with a damp towel after all. Kiss to your belly and all.)
You say it, however, sixteen hours into active labor. Minutes before midnight, almost Halloween day, like your baby wanted to share a birthday with you, which you would never mind as long as you get to hold her. It's when a particularly sharp labor pain hits that you yell it, gripping his hand so tightly you swear you hear his hand crack.
It's angry, and pained, and you swear, just after saying his full government name, that you would make him feel how this felt. No amount of epidural helped this pain, no amount of Lamaze Breathing or doulas helped prepare her or take this pain any better. She'd find a way for him to carry and birth the next one even if she'd have to become a mad scientist. She isn't good with pain already and this isn't helping.
"Kenji Sato! You are having the next one, got I-ngh!!!GOT IT?!"
He just about passed out when they announce you're crowning, because for some gods forsaken reason, he decides to look beyond the blue sheet. It's a horror he will never forget, and he swears he won't put you through another round of whatever your anatomy was doing to push yours and his little princess out of you.
And then she's there.
She's in your arms first, he's busy gathering his emotions as they cut the umbilical cord for him, and you need the first few minutes of skin to skin with her before she has to get cleaned up and given her first dose of vaccines. He holds her after, eyes bleary with tears as he does so so gingerly. He doesn't want to hurt her, doesn't want to accidentally harm her tiny little fragile body. She's a perfect amalgamation of you two. His eyes, a grayish blue, but the rest, he will happily and readily proudly admit, is all your looks. Tousled full head of soft pinky fuschia hair, eyebrows to match, rosy cheeks and little pouty lips. He swears, on everything he loves, she smiles when he is told to do skin to skin with her as well. When she curls into his warmth while you are cleaned up by the nurses. And when you two are able to take her home, when you are given the all clear and she passes her car seat test, and you three are finally back in your house, settling her down in her side sleeper by your bed, it's clear that the few times you use his full name can be bad, but most of them?
They're worth it.
#kenji sato#kenji x reader#ken sato#ultraman rising#ultraman#kenji sato x reader#kenji sato smut#technically
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Hello, I absolutely love your work. iv re read your stuff so many times that it's getting concerning.
Can I request the cullens x artist reader who made a painting of them I just think that would be cute
The Cullens with an Artist! Reader
Thank you?!?! I suggest seeking mental help for rereading my bad stories tho
Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy!
Edward:
We all know that he is an artist too
He made Bella a whole song on the piano
As someone who can play the piano, that’s not easy
So he definitely loves that you’re also artistic
For you, he’s a muse
I mean, how could he not be
Literally the definition of perfect
So obvs you sketch him a lot
When he finds an almost finished painting one day of him, he is floored
He can never seem to wrap his mind around the fact that you are just as obsessed with him as he is with you
He hangs it up
Even if it’s not finished
If you insist on finishing it, he will begrudgingly take it down and give it back
But as soon as it’s done it’s all his
Alice:
She’s also an artist
But more with fashion
And design
She’s not so well-versed with the classical arts like painting or sketching
So she always loves seeing your paintings
She’s a coexistence girly
She loves to just be doing something while you’re painting
You know just sort of existing in the same space at the same time
The day you give her the painting, she is so surprised
It was so difficult for you to hide this from her
Especially with her gift
She absolutely loves it
She hangs it in the main room of the Cullen house
She wants absolutely everyone to see it and acknowledge how talented her s/o is
Jasper:
He loves the arts
They’re relaxing to him
Some of his favorite classes he’s ever taken in all of the schools they’ve been at have been art classes
He’s not good by any means, but he loves it anyway
Art dates with him are a must
He would love that tiktok trend where you and your partner trade paintings every couple of minutes
Never misses an opportunity to tell you that he loves your work
He honestly almost started crying when you showed him your painting of him
You made him look so happy, so peaceful
He’s used to being perceived as a monster
Definitely hangs it up
But only in his room
He wants to be the only one to see it
Rosalie:
She’s more of a technical, sciencey person
Not to say she doesn’t like art
Just that she doesn’t necessarily enjoy making it
She can definitely appreciate good work tho
And she loves everything you make
She buys you new supplies all of the time
If just one pen ran out of ink in your favorite set, she would buy you a whole new set
When you give her that first painting though, she’s obsessed
She wants at least 20 more by tomorrow
But actually, she knows that she’s beautiful
But something about the way you capture her is just so different she loves it
Emmett:
He’s not an art person either
He’s a bit of a meathead
But he can appreciate art
Probably not as deeply as other people can
But he know when it looks good
And he genuinely thinks you’re the best artist ever
He will gladly put all of your little doodles in the clear pockets of his binders
And hang them on his locker
When you give him the painting of him he’s actually dumbfounded
Like awestruck
What do you mean the best artist in the world just made a painting of him?
Get ready to be cuddled for the rest of the night
Esme:
Resident artist
We already knew that tho
I’m pretty sure it’s said that she’s the one who made the grad cap piece?
Idk
Either way she loves art
Pottery dates, painting picnics, date nights at the art museum
She loves it
So if you were to ever paint her and give it to her?
Yeah she’s gonna start crying
She just loves art, she loves you, and you put them together and she’s so in love
She hangs it in the main room
It doesn’t matter if the colors clash
And it’s never coming down
Carlisle:
Another appreciater of the arts
I mean, he probably knew Da Vinci on a personal level this guy is so old
So it’s no shock
Whenever he’s home and hanging out with you, he loves to watch you paint or draw
Especially if he’s doing some paperwork
I just feel like he would like the company while he’s working
Now I don’t see Carlisle as the type of guy to necessarily enjoy pictures or paintings of himself
The only portraits he has in his office are either him in a crowd or family photos
So when you give him a portrait of himself, he’s a little shocked at first
He doesn’t want to seem narcissistic, but damn you made him look good
He hangs it up in your shared bedroom
Even though he knows he will likely never have guests who would see it, he wants to make sure it’s hidden
He just doesn’t want people to think he’s vain
But he secretly loves it so much
Vampire! Bella:
I think I’ve talked about it before but this girl would have loved deviantart
Rip Bella you would have loved fan art of your favorite characters
But she totally had an artsy phase
I don’t think she’s necessarily good or bad
She just prefers to look at art rather than make it
So that’s where you come in
She loves just watching you work
Every once in a while she paints with you
But she always feels inferior when she looks at what you made vs what she made
So she usually just sticks to admiring
The first time you give her a portrait of herself, she doesn’t even know what to do
She’s still getting used to actually perceiving herself as beautiful
And then you capture her like she’s a goddess?
She needs to lie down
She loves it tho
#alice cullen#bella swan#carlisle cullen#esme cullen#edward cullen#emmett cullen#jasper cullen#jasper hale#rosalie cullen#rosalie hale#alice cullen x reader#bella swan x reader#carlisle cullen x reader#esme cullen x reader#emmett cullen x reader#edward cullen x reader#jasper cullen x reader#jasper hale x reader#rosalie cullen x reader#rosalie hale x reader
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never enough, virgin!wonbin x reader
! endurance training, handjob, overstimulation, edging, slight dacryphilia
note : FINALLY something is done with the virgin wonbin thoughts ive been having for a week ..... 🙂↕️
"can i please at least be inside just once?"
"nope. not until you can hold it better."
"you always say that... i've done well the last time, when will it be enough?"
"it will never be enough. not until i say so."
wonbin lays back on his seat with a pout. he's glad the bus is mostly empty so no one can catch a glimpse of your conversation. you both sit at the far back of the bus, away from all the people going home at this hour. wonbin looks outside the window just to be met with the heavy droplets that pour outside, and he turns his head to look at you. he's still sulking, and the serious glare you throw at him makes his heart jump in his chest.
wonbin is your classmate. actually, he's more than that, but you like the "classmate" title, even though the boy doesn't think the same. he'd rather call your relationship "friends with benefits but he's the only one getting benefits". when at school, wonbin is all talk about how good he's in bed, he laughs at his male friends for being virgins at their age. he has the pretty face to make anyone believe his words, but little do they know he actually turns into a puddle when you get your hands on him. you wanted to see for yourself how good he is, he's handsome, and since he said he fucks well, why not? but when you dragged him behind the lockers, wonbin turned into a blushing mess, he didn't even know where to put his hands when you kissed him. he was moaning in your mouth in no time, so hard in his pants he felt like he could burst only from your lips that left his to pepper kisses on his jaw. he begged you not to tell anyone, so instead, you exposed you plan to him. he loses his virginity, and you get to fuck him and with him.
wonbin had no idea at first that fucking with him would mean hours of playing with his cock and nipples, jerking him off so slowly it would make his thighs tremble everytime your fingertips touched his skin. you asked him to keep the count, but he can't recall how many times you made him cum anymore. each time, he would be a shaky and whiny mess, he'd beg you to finally give him what he wants. you always promised it for next time, and thinking of the reward of being inside of you always made him harder than ever.
but now it's been weeks since you started to play with him. wonbin is over at your home almost everyday, and he's never getting his way. the way you would taunt him to reveal his little secret always made him comply and fall to his knees so you could stick your thumb in his mouth until he's drooling all over it.
the bus that's taking you and wonbin home finally reaches your stop, and you take the boy's hand to get down. to anyone, you would probably look like a cute couple walking back from school together. but the grip you have on wonbin's wrist and the tension he's feeling all over his body say otherwise. he can already feel the warmth painting his cheeks red and the anticipation building in his lower stomach. you both walk in silence until you reach your apartment. when the door opens, wonbin doesn't even wait for you, he gets inside and walk straight to you room. he wouldn't want to mess up his routine. you take your time, put down your jacket and bag before joining him.
wonbin sits on your bed with large puppy eyes, he's still upset at how harsh you were to him on the bus. he can't tell you how much it turns him on, or you'll have another reason to mess with his head, his secrets getting heavier each time you see each other. you walk to the bed and let your hand travels his face, from his jaw to his pretty lips, your fingers mess with his hair. you tug on his locks lightly to make his head fall back and give you a prettier view of his neck, his smooth skin almost perfect under your hungry lips. wonbin sighs heavily at the contact of your warm mouth, he grips the sheets in his hands, his legs rub together to get some frictions on his clothed dick.
you get away from his skin and push him down on the bed, his back gently hitting the blanket. wonbin knows what's next. his hands reach the hem of his shirt before taking it off, he then hurriedly opens his pants to get rid of any clothes that stops his cock from finally breathing. he doesn't care being naked in front of you anymore, he's used to your eyes burning his body when you look at him. wonbin takes a deep breath when he slides his underwear down, his already red and leaking dick hitting his stomach. you sit next to him and watch it twitch with anticipation, wonbin is almost moaning just from your warm presence next to him.
"are you ready?"
"if i do well, can i finally fuck you next time?"
"depends on how long you last today."
wonbin rests his head on the bed, his chest heaves with his sharp breaths. you let your fingers travel his faintly toned stomach and wonbin already squirm under your touch, shivers covering his whole body. your nails graze his skin down his thighs, his cock drips some more precum when you get so close to it. you could watch him for hours and drive him crazy, your hands massaging his inner thighs enough to have him cum untouched. with one finger, you draw slow circles on his lower stomach, going all the way up his length and rubbing his slit, his arousal quickly coating your finger. you lay next to wonbin and wrap your hand around his dick, your mouth finds one of his nipple and you suck eagerly on it.
the boy on your bed is already a moaning mess, his back arches on the sheets and his hips buck into your hand to get any kind of friction, but you stay completely still, only giving attention to his chest. your tongue twirls around his hardened pink bud, it makes wonbin cry out your name. he claws at the bed desperately for more, and after one more kiss on his chest, you sit up next to him again. you finally give attention to his cock that's calling for you, and stroke him at a dangerously slow pace. wonbin tries to steady his breath as much as he can, his eyes closed and concentrated on the pleasure you give him.
it doesn't take long to break him apart though. once you start paying more attention to his leaking tip, his hips jerk up constantly in your hand and you have to pin him down. the cries that come out of his throat are broken by your name rolling on his tongue over and over again. the way his thighs are shaking when you pick up the pace tell you everything you need to know. you give wonbin one more stroke before letting go of his dick. his knuckles turn white from how hard he's holding the covers under him, his cock twitches desperately. you rub your thumb on his slit and wonbin's back arches again on the bed.
"stop moving so much, that's how you get tired so fast."
"p-please.... give me m-more..."
"you will cum so fast thought."
"i won't i-i swear i won't please keep g-going..."
you want to believe wonbin's weak promise and you wrap your hand again around his length. you watch him close his eyes again and put all his willpower in stilling his hips for you. you give him lazy strokes again, your hand covered in the sticky precum that keeps rolling down his cock. you rest your other hand on his thigh and he jumps in your touch, his lips parting in a silent moan. for a while, only the wet sound of your palm around his dick and his heavy breathing can be heard in your room.
since you started your little training with wonbin, he never really got better, he would always cum awkwardly fast especially if you started teasing him. he lasted longer the last few times though, and you couldn't wait to have him inside of you and feel him filling your insides after a few thrusts. you loved watching him cry out your name each time he ended up fucking your fist, his hips desperately bucking up to meet your hand after you edged him for hours so he can finally gets the sweet release he's begging for.
every once in a while, you leave wonbin's cock to watch him from your place, you sit crossed legged on your bed and smile at the boy's desperation. his black hair stick to his forehead and his chest shines with a thin coat of sweat, his hands weakly rest next to him as he got tired from holding the sheets so tightly. beads of precum form on his slit and roll down his cock or drop on his lower stomach. it stains your bed, it makes your hand sticky and wet, and it gives shivers to wonbin each time you blow on his dick with a chuckle.
it's always when wonbin is the less ready that you start to jerk him off again, you barely listens to him as he speaks about his day so his mind would focus on anything but his throbbing cock. you grip his dick out of nowhere and hear his breath catch in his throat. his thoughts get lost in the pleasure, unable to form a single word but the desperate "please" that escapes his lips over and over again. you pout at his sensitivity and you tighten your grip around him, your palm very slowly making its way up and down.
"are you close already?"
"mmhh... p-please..."
"can you hold it a little longer? just a little."
"i'm n-not... not sure... it's s-so..."
"just a little more, i know you can do it."
wonbin hides his face in the sheets when you quicken your pace, his hips buck up again in your hand and you instantly let go of his cock. wonbin's head jerks up to look at you with a pleading whine, only for his head to drop back when you flatten your hand on his tip. his back arches and his hands find their way in his hair to push away the strands that cover his eyes. your palm rubs the sensitive head of his cock, wonbin's breath gets more erratic and louder. you give him a few pumps and check your phone that sat next to you on the bed. he's actually handling it well, probably the best he has done yet, but it's still not enough for you. you just want to make sure he could last when fucking you, you're just helping out! you feel wonbin's dick pulse in your hand and you stop all your movements again to squeeze it. his voice breaks into a high pitched cry, the tears that had been filling his eyes finally flowing down his cheeks. it's always been your favorite sight, he's such a wreck when you get your hands on him and he's never been more beautiful to you. you massage his thighs and from the way his cock throbs constantly, you can tell he's so close just a touch could make him burst.
"p-please... i'm gonna- i w-wanna cum please... i n-need to cum s-so bad..."
"hmm... you've done well... but it's not enough you know that."
when you start stroking him again, you see his head dig into the mattress and deep in the blanket, his fingers clawing at the sheets, his parted lips let every moan escape his throat. you can't tell if his cheeks glisten because of the sweat or because of his tears that roll down his face and down his neck.
"you know wonbin... i might just let you fuck me next time..."
"a-ah please... i-i'm cumming p-please i'm c-cumming..!"
you jerk him off faster and watch the ropes of hot and thick fluid hit your fingers and his tensed stomach, you make sure to grip his tip through his orgasm that has his thighs shaking. his hips stutters in your fist until he weakly shoots one last drop of cum on your hand. wonbin tries to get away from you and your teasing hand that keeps playing with his sensitive cock, he turns to the side and burry his whines in the sheets, he can't control the desperate thrusts of his hips until you finally let go of him. you check your phone again while wonbin catches his breath, he sniffles audibly when he finally sits up next to you. you look at his messed up face and push away gently a few strands of hair that stick to his forehead, your hand then resting on his cheek so you can wipe away his tears. wonbin looks at you with shining hopeful eyes that could make you melt.
"did i- did i do well? d-did i hold it long enough?"
"you know it's never enough to me... but you did well, i might actually let you inside me next time. you'll do well this time too, right?"
wonbin's cock weakly twitches at your words and the smile he gives you have you burning inside. maybe he could actually hold it when he fucks you. you couldn't wait.
im crazy wonbin is all ive been thinking about for the past few days im CRAZYYYYYY thank you cee for supporting me through the wonbin breakdown
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I don’t think I’m gonna be able to put it into the right words, but I can’t tell you how happy it makes me to watch that final episode of miseinen. bc it is one thing to mention marriage in a show about two men in a country where that’s not legal; it’s one thing to mention it as an inevitable, as just a waiting game, and leave it there, just as it’s one thing to mention it as a fantasy, or as something a couple doesn’t need to prove or certify their feelings. it’s another thing to show, even for just a short 30 minute episode, what that waiting actually feels like, and the kind of feelings being in that no man’s land of wanting but not being able to have can bring up. bc i can’t think when ive ever seen a bl touch on it so explicitly, at least not off the top of my head, or at least not to the extent of dedicating a whole episode to that feeling. bc you really feel how complex and indescribable that feeling is for jin in that episode, and while it’s mixed with that still lingering fear of haruki leaving and one day suddenly not being there, you feel that it’s not just for that certainty that he wants to be married. he wants the whole package of it, because he truly loves haruki. he sees his friends have relationships and talk about marriage, he feels the pressure from his mom and the rest of the people around him to think about marriage. and that’s exactly the thing of it. it’s not just that he can’t get married, it’s the fact that he has to hide the fact he wants it, and hide his relationship altogether. it’s not simply just marriage, it fits into a wider thing of him initially accepting his queerness and now not knowing if or how he wants to share that with other people. it’s just like- i really don’t want to gush but holy fuck it’s just so excellently done. bc you feel how different it is from haruki too, and it goes back to their differences in upbringing, bc haruki, after the difficulties he’s gone through, now finds it easier to accept and share these things bc he’s never exactly had anyone that would be impacted by this, but not only does jin have people to tell, he’s also been raised to follow a very traditional path in life, the one with least resistance, which very much means marrying a woman and having children and all of that. and it’s not that he can’t accept that he won’t do that, bc we’ve seen throughout the show how he has always faced what he’s been told is right with the open mindedness to question whether it is right, or right to him. but we’ve also seen through the show that the people around him do not have that same openmindedness, it’s why he never shared his friendship with haruki with anyone and now doesn’t want to share his relationship. but what i want to stress most is that the show perfectly shows that it’s not black and white. he is not choosing not to say anything, but he’s also not forced to stay silent. you see the greyness not just bc the situation is nuanced, but also bc at the end of the day it’s a human making this decision, and a human does not simply take in inputs and output the right decision and stick by that. you see him want to say something, you see him pull back, you see him be resentful of the way things are but also learn to accept that that’s how they are at the moment. you just… you see him live through having that in his head and what it feels like on any particular day and it’s just so incredibly amazing and important to see that in a character. it feels so fucking human. and i didn’t expect to get so emotional over a special ep about marriage, esp bc ive never much cared for marriage, ive never found it necessary, but when you take the time to show that it’s what 2 characters want, dedicate a whole ep to showing it, instead of just using it as a default happy ending, well… it’s just the cherry on top to a show that’s been absolutely fucking phenomenal. i will stan this show till i die thank you very much.
#miseinen#our youth#I don’t know what else to say about this show other than bravo it’s incredible#ive kind of run out of words#but you know a show is good on a whole other level when it has someone like me getting emo over marriage
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