#but i cant sit at my computer
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When you finally have the motivation to be productive but your chronic illness has decided that you can't even sit up today.
#Pots is fun#postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome#pots#i just want to write!#but i cant sit at my computer#so instead im making dumb posts in bed rather than actually writing scenes for these characters#i hate it so much#chronic pain#chronic illness#chronically ill
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HI MIEKE TRICK OR TREAT PLEASE :D
HI LEA AND FELLOW NOEL ENJOYER HAVE SOME NOEL
#HEHEHE been sitting on that one a while#so many noel sketches on my computer you have no idea#(also everyone who sent an ask: I will respond in a second i just need a bit i have a friend over and cant draw for another 2 or so hrs! <3#malevolent#my art#noel finley#charlie dowd#fanart#art#ask
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I looted some closets! Original idea goes to @jollierot!!
They put their lamb in different outfits and haddddd to jump on that! It was so fun (Y'all... Excuse me if I misspelled anything I'm dyslexic af)
outfits are as follows: @runningwithscizzorz , (I forgot the bell and actually turned my computer back on. You deserve better king.) @unwri-ten , @aychama , and @xmajordumps. Yall have some BEAUTIFUL OUTFITS !
uhhhh pics with out my unnecessary ass comments under the cut LMAOOO
(its 430am)
#cult of the lamb#my art#cotl lamb#digital art#OMFG yall#LMAOOOO my mf HAND#but lmaoo#so worth it#i think these look dope as hell#i might do more#why not?#uhhh#UHHH#i cant believe i did this in one sitting#i need to go to be#pinetree stop yapping in the tags#ok#i EVEN PUT A REMINDER#dont forget to color the bell#make sure to go back#JMFC#i deadass booted my computer back up#to fix that#i would not sleep othewise#okay fr gn#or morning
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aughhh okay FINE ill draw traditionally
#cat stole my seat so i cant sit at my computer anymore. hers now#ill have to draw in bed instead. sketchbook time#or i could... play on the switch...#shut up dave
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Are u ok? It be a bit since u posted and I’m a bit worried, sorry if I bother u.
All good! Wlb is on posting hiatus until october 6th, so no posts for pages.
and im away from home for the next 7 days, so i dont have pc/art access for a little while
im house sitting for this guy
(thank you tacobellabae for editing photos of my favorite dog, Kilo.)
#Answers#But yeah just house sitting for my parents and I didnt want to hassle with moving my whole computer#It is driving me nuts to not draw comics though#Also cant answers asks that i want to add art too btw
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i'm feeling a pathological need for attention right now but it probably won't make me feel better so i'm about to get out a coloring book and listen to a narrative podcast whilst i color. to do something concrete with my hands. i am so mentally healthy. everyone clap <-this is technically giving me attention but that's fine.
#this is a better plan of action than sitting here for another hour going 'why do i feel baaaad'#announcing it to the world so i actually follow thru in putting my computer away.#autoimmune tag#tangentially. in that i cant really write or do anything more productive right now
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hey chat not gonna lie, the fact that i decided to post DYWTK chapters twice a week means that i've already written like three fucking weeks of content and I am so fucking impatient guys. Im so impatient. so uh, yeah. I might be upping that to three chapters a week for my own sanity lmao
#do you want to know#dywtk#radioapple#duckiedeer#hazbin hotel#hazbin fanfic#no for real though#i have so much plot planned out#and no motivation to write it#because im still hung up on making sure the other chapters look good#and#they do#but that will not stop me from editing and re-editing them forever#i have literally spent hours and hours sitting in front of my computer just tweaking already written chapters#instead of actually writing lmao#i need to share my work#i cant help it
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YOU KNOW WHAT. YOU KNOW WHA T. IM GOING TO FUCIGNJH. FINISH. THIS BLIND FAITH CHAPTER 3 TODAY. IF IT KILLS ME. AND IT MIGH T. I CSNT LOOK AT IT ANYMORE I DONT CARE IF ITS GARBAGE. IT NEEDS TO BE OUT OF MY SIGHT. I HAVE TO I HAVE TO I HAV E T O
#IM GOING TO STARBUCKS AND IM SITTING UNTIL MY HEAD EXPLODES OR I FINISH THE DOC#itll only be like 3k words anyways i can yap that out np#i think#I jUST#WANT TO FINISH SONETHING FOR ONCE#THE LAST 2 WEEKS HAVE BEEN SO UNFOCUSED#ive also had a migraine for 5 days#but anyway#HANDCUFFING MYSELF TO THE COMPUTER UNTIL ITS DONE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJJSJJFJVJRJGJ#caspost#I JUST CANT ANGMOR E
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AHAHAAHAHJAAJSBSMDJDNDKMXBWHXI???1??!?!!??
#WHEEZING#I CANT YALL IM DYING#YOU CAN DO MANY THINGS WITH THE BUTT-BOUNCE#omfg#im losing it. i am Losing it#pacman#pacman world 2#this would prime streaming material im talking to myself a lot as play but to do that id have to sit in chair and then id have to shower#and i dont wana ;u;#anyway i remembered that the flinstones bowling game exists yesterday#and found it today - it was on ps1 not on computer as i feared#so i found it!!!!#and remembered WAY more of the dialogue/sound queues than i thought i did-which was already a lot#i got all da pins (ง•̀_•́)ง#other than 2 in the final bonus stage cos oH MY GOD????#THE *CAMERA* THE *BULL* THE FUCKING *SNAKES* NOT WORKING TO GET YOU ONTO LEDGES LIKE THEYRE SPOSED TO HALF THE TIME#when i unlocked the first bonus and saw the map/title card screen i was like 'ohno...oh i remember being horrible at this..'#but then it wasnt that bad#cos i was thinking of yOU final bonus rounnd FUCK YOU#EUARGH#its fine im fine im chill im normal#also this is my post so i can ramble in the tags all i want ha#ive always been So so enamoured with old games#that load in chunks and have horrible misaligned textures that are a little blurry cos theyre scaled up#the bowling game is a Prime example of that cos the map is constantly moving forward lMAO so its like .. half a screen of map#and then just VOID that will eventually load in another chunk of half a map as it gets closer but always the Void#stupidass little seagulls too i love them#gop think drag queens are radicalizing us? no...no the capitalistic asshole boss in the flinstones bedrock bowling circa 2000 radicalized m#anyway pacman is FAR too fucking agile in this game its offputting#and the SLIDEY back and forth he does everywhere ooooh my lorde
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bugs when you pick up a rock that are honestly chill as fuck
#im having troubles theres just too many ways for me to draw things i just cant decide.#those posts of scribblings i do here and there are me trying to let myself do something low effort and just draw however it comes out#ive been trying to dabble in Just drawing and seeing what it looks like. some right doodling. and just having only the time or energy todra#with computer mouse for a little bit#but here i try ..... i draw and i enjoy it ...... love to draw ...... when i get ample time to sit down its nice#this actually is pretty clear in my head i dont have many worries. theres just many ways i could stylize them and their features ....#their heights are funny. tetia is a bit taller and richeh is a bit shorter. i need to move coco up an inch to match agott
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this week has just. not been a good week (it's only Wednesday)
#i cant see my butch i had to take my grandma to the hospital last night im just so irritated i just want to stay at home but i have#a million things to do. i just spent £100 trying to get my laptop fixed but its impossible because the serial number is missing#and the manufacturer of my laptop doesnt let you see it via BIOS 😐 thats £100 i could've saved since i don't#have a job anymore and ive been without my laptop for a week while having to ship stuff off and it's rlly hard#without my computer! i don't want to go outside anymore i want to sit in the house and watch tv all day!!!!!!#like im blocking out the fact that i have to find a new job soon and soon that will bring anxiety and sadness 🙏#it never ends
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at what point am i to blame for what adhd does to me. at what point is it "adhd made it fucking physically impossible for me to focus today so i didnt do much work and hate it" versus just "i didnt do much work." am i allowed to feel shitty about it or is that just wallowing
#genuine question honestly#like. it feels like fucking shit to not have anything to show for sitting at a computer for 8+ hrs#but like thats My Fucking Fault for not doing the work#like god i tried but it just wasnt good enough#and like. what am i allowed to say about it? oh my adhd meds ran out (5 months ago) thats why it didnt work out?#but the reason i havent gotten new ones and let these ones run out is bcs of the same exact reason#i just couldnt bring myself to refill them just like i couldnt work today#so thats again my fault and it Sucks SoBad#i base a lot of my self worth on being productive and adhd makes mr feel like im not worth much when i cant do anything#UGH ANYWAY thats dramatic but. idk. bums me out i really was looking forward to working a long time today#adhd#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#actually adhd#adhd problems#adhd brain#vent#rant#adhd rant#neurodiverse stuff
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I've got too many games I want to play and not enough free time 😭 I still need to finish my BG3 playthrough but since Endless Ocean: Luminous came out I've been playing a lot of that instead. Also just got back into Wizard101 last night. Started playing House Flipper again last weekend. Still need to finish BOTW so I can start a TOTK playthrough and finish Pokemon Shield so I can start on Pokemon Violet. I've been fighting off the urge to start up a new Skyrim playthrough for weeks. My brother just told me that Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door is getting ported to the Switch. And now I'm suddenly feeling inspired to replay DAI... And throughout all of this I'm also playing the hell out of DragonVale on my phone. Someone just pay me to play video games all day please
#and before anyone suggests it: no i cant try to get into streaming#the way i play video games is extremely frustrating for other people to watch ahdjsksl#no one is going to give me money for producing a video where i spend two hours checking every barrel in the map while juggling my inventory#and then immediately give up on a puzzle and just sit in silence for 30 minutes while i look up a walkthrough instead#i need a situation that pays me $200 a day just to be autistic at the screen alone in the comfort of my own home#rambling#a few years ago i made it a mission to play all of the dragon age games and dlcs in order and i did not complete it#i got all the way to inquisition before i quit#i had already played it on ps3 but i wanted to replay on my new gaming laptop and unfortunately my computer decided it was too complicated#and also i just wanted to play as an elf again and i was resisting that urge bc i played as an elf the first time and wanted something new#so i didnt connect to my character as much#BUT ive learned a lot about optimizing my games from getting bg3 to run on my computer#so i think i could get it to handle dai now. especially if i upgrade to ssd like ive been wanting#and i just saw a dai post on my dash that made me daydream about possible characters and i was struck with inspiration#when i first played through on ps3 i didnt know anything about da lore. it was my first dragon age game#i was just doing whatever i thought seemed coolest#so i basically modeled my inquisitor after my dnd oc and then just picked a vallaslin i thought was pretty#and then when it came time to pick a specialization i was just like 'i mean my hand has rift magic right? seems obvious enough'#but now i know the LORE. and the dalish really interest me. and i want to make an inquisitor thats their own character#i didnt want to replay another elf mage bc i thought it would be too similar#but at the same time i wanted to re-experience dai (and experience trespasser for the first time) now that i knew more about the dalish#(with mods that fix the annoying bits where your character seems to not know about their own religion of course lol...)#i was thinking about that and i just got hit with some inspiration#instead of 'my dnd character but with a cool tattoo and rift magic and they kinda roll with the inquisitor stuff bc idk whats going on'#what if i made a more intentional character with a much different personality and their own backstory#theyre still the first of their clan but i know what that means now so theyre not really into the herald of andraste stuff#theyre a devotee of falon'din with his vallaslin and fittingly choose necromancy specialization (tho theyre annoyed by all the maker talk)#they can look cool and goth and maybe they even make some different choices about the well of sorrows 👀#i could keep rambling but im running out of tags gah#anyways ive got lots of ideas now and i think the playthrough would be unique enough to be worth it
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God I've been thinking about the KNPS Inika stuff a lot lately which is GARBAGE because that's not something that's happening for literal years in-universe and I have no idea if I'm ever going to write that stuff BUT ALSO if I don't get this stuff out of my head it's going to give me brain rot so here we go (spoilers for main KNPS fic ahoy)
So I figure they become Toa in their last year of high school. The former KNPS students have largely drifted apart by this point. They still see each other in classes and stuff, but with a few exceptions they kinda got their own lives away from each other once they weren't the only seven people their age that they knew. Some of them started hanging with the kids a year younger than them more once they got to high school, too, but largely they're kind of scattered. Takua and Jaller are still best friends, but Jaller and Hahli have drifted a lot, to the point where both of them have tried dating others. Hewkii and Macku, on the other hand, had a very tearful goodbye when he graduated, then a miserable year apart, and then they got back together when she got to high school and have been very happy together since, but now there's a lot of stress and anticipation for his upcoming high school graduation and what that might mean for them. Kongu has an entirely separate friend group, Nuparu too, and Matoro mostly hangs around the library with Kopeke. All of them, however, the ones from a year behind included, are still friends with Takua.
I haven't figured out all the logistics yet, but they still get struck by lightning and become Toa at some point. So they're having to go through their senior year of high school thrust back together with powers they don't understand or know how to control and their main mentor is Takua of all people.
Vakama has such a headache.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the Toa Mata are doing their own thing. Some of them have gotten married. Onua and Lewa bought a house that Onua has turned the entire front lawn of into a massive garden. There's also some large trees in the backyard that Lewa likes to sleep in, draped over the branches like a leopard. Vakama, Nokama, and Matau have long since moved in together. Onewa retired about a year ago but comes in to supply sometimes and he complains about it every time but won't take his name off the supply list.
Things have been quiet at Kini Nui since the events of the main fic, but trouble is brewing and our new Toa are just the team to deal with it. Maybe. Look I'm gonna be honest most of what I've been thinking about here has been character stuff and not plot stuff. Half of it has been shoving Matoro at various characters to figure out who I want to ship him with and picturing Nuparu in shop class because that's where I'm at as a person right now.
#bionicle#ficblogging#knps#my back hurts and i cant sit at my computer to write rn so yall get this youre welcome
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hi i’m sick so no posts for a few days 💔
#i feel like such garbage i want to SCREAM#i cant even sit at my computer i just wanna lay in bed#gonna go cry now bye#druidberryspeaks#dl
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i miss these netbooks sometimes man even tho they'd suck nowadays cuz everything (websites, files, etc.) now is too big, bloated and heavy
#ok nini#these came with 2 gb of space and windows 7. and a few custom stuff like a camera program thats friendly for kids#and a few games with a penguin...something like that#oh! and pivot animator. some came with that. but mine didnt :(#i would emulate from nes games to gba ones on these bad boys..#i think...my memory is a bit blurry so....i cant recall correctly#i was careless with technology as a kid so these computers fell straight to the floor from time to time#BUT STILL WORKED JUST FINE !!!!!!!#also broke the power button once oopss haha#but still did fine so lol#that netbook also did survive my 7 year old self downloading around 200 images of mlp (plus another 90 images sitting in the recycle bin)
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