#but I try to remember tidbits about MCs and such!

[misc-obeyme]

to <3 anon, I was gonna say definitely play the event since you have the cheat cards, but playing through the battles can be time consuming the first time around if your team isn't built. Since you'd have to play everything one by one at least once (I'm so used to skipping the battles ajsjd). Once you get through everything once with an A or S rank (can't remember which), you can quick clear (and then you can collect AP/joker cards/other things to save up for when you're ready). You could also skip the story parts if you're worried about spoilers?

I am someone who plays both, and I can tell you it's wild. I'm stuck on OG around lesson 60, I need to build my cards more, but I'm completely caught up in NB and have full teams that are all 98+ level wise. I log in on both apps to do daily tasks every day

I do both events simultaneously, log in to collect the AP at both times (NB is priority because it loads faster), but I just quick clear the battles every night to get the prizes. NB is the one where I'll try to use up all my AP before work so that when I get home, it's fully replenished.

I love OG to death, present Mammon would have to be ripped from my hands, and I love how much more of his character we get to see in NB. But it is a little frustrating and discouraging when I can't get past battles in OG. I've been playing NB since day one, even without finishing OG, all because I didn't want to get "left behind". I've got so much uhh fomo (?) from past Mammon cards that I never had a chance to get in OG. Which has now turned into me having every single Mammon card in NB... 💀 Even memory cards that feature him (except HDD .5 charge mission memory card, I was broke at the time)

I am dedicated to this man 😭 anyway sorry that got kinda sad at the end. I have my reasons for loving both games, and OM Mammon will always have a chokehold on me. I'm gonna be old one day and using a cane that's probably yellow because it reminds me of him 💀 It's silly things like that that get me through the day, I even have a photo card of him in my wallet 😗

also apparently my store made 10k over predicted sales on Sunday. I don't know what the prediction was originally, but jesus 😭 there's been lots of wild customers and things going wrong, but I am still kicking. I run solely on caffeine and spite !!

i don't know if I rambled about it before, but I have ideas for what my mc would work as in the devildom. and I'm thinking about the dinner rotation in the HoL, but that's for another day's ask lol OKAY BYEE

- ✨ anon

Oh gosh, I am used to skipping the battles, too lol. It does depend on what your goals are, I think! I personally play through every event... though sometimes it's almost painful because the stories are often not great. (This one was especially underwhelming.) But I read them because sometimes you get good one liners lol. And I only grind for stuff if I want the cards, but if you wanted to use up your AP you might as well use it on events! Then you'll get rewards, even if you don't get the cards.

Yeah, OG is messed up when it comes to getting through all the lessons and NB is shaping up to be no better. But there are a lot more lessons in OG, so it takes longer. Back when I first started playing, I got through like the first two seasons and then didn't play the main story for months while I leveled my cards. Then the same thing happened between season three and season four lol. Then they were like NB is happening! And I was like oh hell no I am gonna finish season four if it kills me.

Yeah you got it with FOMO! Fear of missing out! I had that, too, with past cards that are just... lost to me forever. I did a similar thing, but with Barb. Every NB Barb card is belong to me! I've been spending my time getting some of the older ones from Lonely Devil in OG, too. And just unlocking everything like chats and what not.

LOL I'm loving the idea of little old you out there with a yellow cane 'cause of Mams, that's adorable!!

I have a few lil bits of merch and it absolutely brings me joy. Plus when you're old, you'll be free to do whatever you want. I feel like people tend to write it off as oh old people are so silly!

Caffeine and spite, ✨ anon, I swear I am concerned about you! I hope things calm down for you so you can take a nice break!

Hmmm I don't think I remember what your MC's job might be? But if you already told me, please feel free to tell me again!

[kuzure-collapse]

trying to find an art style again. i drew these as images for the results of my Which Bro from Loser's Bromance is your BF quiz. I've been pretty inconsistent with their designs in the art so far, so consider this their official colors and designs.

tidbits about their character design:

yes, i redrew tomohiro and kotose many times. their bangs are hard to draw and kotose's glasses are being glasses. i kept drawing their bangs hanging in front of their irises, which isn't very aesthetically pleasing.

i can never remember which side of kotose's face the birthmarks are on. should be 2 along the left chin and 1 under the right eye

nor do i remember which eye satsuma's bangs cover, or the side that yanagi braids his hair. both should be left side.

the initial chapter art featured both satsuma and yumeki with white hair. that was how i imagined them in my head. over time, i decided i wanted each character to have a theme color. satsuma was supposed to be a sort of grey white with some blue, but the umiuta's were already blue, so i gave him green undertones. yumeki's hair got pink undertones and became fluffier. Green still doesn’t feel very right on satsuma, but grey doesn’t really fit the rainbow theme. and the rainbow is a must.

after drawing satsuma, i tried to mimic that art style for the other guys. alas, i was too caught up in the details and they didn't turn out as good

for all of my fics, i draw a "placeholder oc" to insert in my chapter art. they each have a unique design with generic colors (usually just black and white) and "Y/n" somewhere on their person. I've never designed one so late into a fic until now.

i nearly forgot to draw mc until after i loaded the speedpaint. after that, i drew him lazily and it turned out pretty well. maybe lazy is the way. unlike the others, i didn't use any references for his

[howlingmoonrise]

How do I write as good as you? Where do you get inspiration to weave your words as beautifully?

Hello sweet anon! Thank you so much 💖💖💖

Answering the second question first because it's shorter and it's also a part of the first: mostly, I get inspirations from other stories. Take the things you love from them - why do you love them? What resonates with you? Which scenes/characters/quotes come to mind and why did they leave such a mark? How can you make it so that yours come close to that? Dissect them and figure out what about them makes you tick, and how you can adapt it to the genre/voice/ambience you want to write.

As a more concrete example, I love the writing styles of Juliet Marillier and everythursday (the latter used to write for the HP fandom, you can still find PDFs/EPUBs of her work floating around). While you're reading for pleasure, if you come across passages that you feel that sound interesting, analyse them and try to figure out how you would write a sentence like that.

I'm still trying to figure out how everythursday uses verbs so deliciously - instead of the most logical choices, she often picks verbs i'd never even have thought to associate with a certain action and make it so much more vivid/real, and I'm insanely jealous of however she manages to do that. Every time I reread her writing I take mental notes of when/how/with which verbs she replaces more common ones with; another thing that endears me greatly in her writing are the tiny details that humanize the characters such (the MC noticing that there is "a freckle or perhaps a fleck of dirt" on the knot of the ML's wrist, or that he's wearing a black sock and a navy one because either he didn't notice or didn't care enough to match socks - and these are actual tidbits that are on her fic Finders that were so vivid that I just remember them off the top of my head like that).

More concrete writing advice (that specifically works for me, YMMV):

Vary it up. Don't start sentences and paragraphs always in the same way. Change paragraph lengths instead of keeping to consistent blocks. Change sentence length too - and sentence structure! - or the brain will get bored and start skipping ahead because it's always the same old rhythm. The image below is the best example of this I've seen yet:

Riding on the coattails of that one, I'm a fan of using different kinds of punctuation to change up the rhythm and sentence structure, but it's good to know whether you're actually using them correctly or it's bound to get distracting to the reader. This is very much a personal taste one though, even more than the others.

"Said" isn't dead! "Said" is very much alive and kicking! "Said" is the default verb your brain will basically ignore and won't be bothered by, and that means you should use it the most often. You use the others when you want to emphasize certain dialogue bits or want a particular inflection (like when there's a question), but it's going to get distracting if you use too many variations in a row.

Adverbs also aren't dead and this is the hill I die kill on. "Said softly" is very different from "whispered" and on many occasions it's less jarring. Much like the above, though, you don't want to use too many in a row unless it's for specific stylized sentences/emphasis (e.g.: "completely and perfectly and incandescently happy").

Mood is important. So important. And which words and sentence structure/lengths you use influence this greatly! You want a higher frequency of short and snappy words/sentences for fast-paced scenes; languid, longer sentences and more flowery words for, say, painting an idyllic day on a Victorian era parlour where the most they do is enjoy the sun and write correspondence. The places and ways you work in the descriptions also works to build this up.

Simplify. Sometimes you have this one specific habit/description/colour you really want to work in! But sometimes, idk, "as blue as the lake waters by the spring morning sunlight", or "her pacing habit that had existed since she was a kid living in the old foster house in Mulder's Lane" will absolutely clog up and wreck your sentence/paragraph, and despite loving that particular description you might have to simplify it to "spring morning blue" or "her pacing habit".

Kill your darlings (yes, I hate some interpretations of this too). This one follows up a bit from the point above: remove the bits/characters that are ruining your scene/story, even if you really like how they sound when examined on their own (you can move them to a scraps document for if you want to add them back in later and/or hate deleting stuff like me).

I hate this one but. You're gonna have to delete stuff. If you're stuck and have been despairing for days over how to continue a scene, the solution is very likely in deleting the last few paragraphs, or the whole scene, or perhaps more. The issue is rarely in the last sentence you wrote. Figure out where the scene started going off the rails and go from there instead of trying to fruitlessly continue a scene you're not enjoying and that isn't going anywhere.

Mix in description with dialogue/action. Unless I'm writing-- idk, food? I don't really like to do huge descriptive blocks. We all hated reading four entire pages describing some curtains in high school, right? So for me what works is to work in little bits of description amidst the rest. "She had long raven hair tied up in a ponytail" is far less engaging than mentioning the way her ponytail bounces when she does a quick jog for the bus, and at some later point saying that she brushed back her dark hair, for example.

Break up dialogue, actually. Going from the above and also the very first point, you want to vary up your rhythm, and a huge block of dialogue is one of the things this applies to. Also having only quick dialogue exchanges with no tags can be fun for a portion of a scene (or a specific genre of fic) and it's perfect for humour/snappy banter, but you rarely want to read a fic where all the dialogue is only that. Throw in some action/descriptions between dialogues bits, or even in the middle of a sentence a character is speaking, and give it some oomph. Take care not to overdo it and make the reader forget how the sentence started, though!

Pacing. Working with the above, but adding "description" (word used loosely here) to a place where you feel like things are going too fast is going to help you make it feel not as abrupt and give it some breathing room. Conversely, removing all the interim action/description is going to make it feel like the next bit happened right after.

"Write the same way you speak" is bullshit. I know several of my friends defend this but. Nope! Sorry, you can't sell me on that one. If you're writing an atmospherical story you're not going to write a character going "Uh, no, but wait, actually, I said like--" all the time unless that character is either shy or nervous. You also don't usually use people's names all the time in real life conversations, for example, but in dialogue it can help the reader situate themselves regarding who's speaking and make it feel more intimate/pointed depending on the scene.

Love the words you use. Note that this is different from loving your writing: what I mean is that if you use a series of words you find unpleasant (and this is especially noticeable with smut and words referring to genitals, which people usually have very strong feelings about) in places where something is supposed to be nice and flow prettily, it's not going to sound nice or pretty. Nice words can be "sing", "mulled", "cruel"; not so pleasant words can be "warbled", "groin", "odoriferous" - not so much due to their meanings, but due to how the word itself sounds to you, especially in the context of the sentence. There are ill-meaning words that can sound pleasant, and vice-versa. But "her body sings as she stretches" hits much different than "her body warbles as she stretches" - which can absolutely be used for humour and in other situations, but you need to be conscious and aware of how your specific word choice will hit. I personally agonize over word choices for hours, because for example I will want the specific implied meaning of "sussurred" but I will hate the sound of it in the context of that particular sentence, and no synonyms are working in a sufficiently pleasing manner (and I will often end up rewriting the sentence because of this).

Try to stay in-character, especially in dialogue. Characters don't all speak the same. A character that canonly only says "Mm" and short sentences suddenly dropping a huge speech will be a hard sell. Similarly, a character that speaks formally isn't about to drop slang and "yeah" left and right. A Fantasy Medieval Era character will speak far more formally than a modern day one - unless that's the gag on the canon media (or your original stuff) - but a commoner will generally not speak the same as a king, and neither of those will speak like a modern person at all.

Also, the one things everyone hates to hear, myself included: practice. I've been writing for... a pretty long time, oof, and I was very lucky in my first forays into fic writing, with a very chill and supportive fandom (Danny Phantom in like... 2007-2009 or so) - and back then my writing was terrible. But I had the space to experiment and commit all manners of writing atrocities, and getting that out of the way allowed me to understand a lot of what works and what doesn't. It's kind of like drawing: just because you can picture something perfectly in your head, it doesn't mean it's going to get translated well to paper, and to get better at that you're going to have to study and practice anatomy, shading, folds, etc before it starts getting anywhere near what you have in your head. It's much the same with writing, though the equivalent notions feel a lot more abstract and aren't as easily categorized.

This got a bit long (to no one's surprise), but I hope this helps! Let me know if you'd like me to explain any points further, and once again thank you for you lovely words 💖

[yukidragon]

Sunny Day Jack - Love and Sex Headcanons

You read the title, you know what the topic is about; I’m going to be rambling off my personal headcanons for the romantic and sexual preferences of the main cast of Something’s Wrong with Sunny Day Jack. This is as it applies to my fanfics Sunshine in Hell and Sunshine in Another World, so I’ll be including my version of the MC, Alice King.

Content warnings: This fandom/game/content is for Adults Only. There is talk of sex in this post. A lot of it. I will be going into graphic detail at times, as well as touch on some serious issues on occasion, such as SA, trauma, negative body image, toxic relationships, religious guilt, homophobia, bigotry, past child abuse, sex work, and such.

While I intend to keep things mostly spicy and sweet, sometimes darker topics affect a person’s view about sex and preferences, since sex can be complicated that way. This is especially the case if a character deals with some traumatic experience that relates to their sex life/sexuality. I will try to trod lightly on the heavier topics when I can.

I must emphasize that, while I draw information from the game’s canon as shown in both versions of the demo, Sleepy Time Jack, as well as official information/art and development images/posts, ultimately these are my personal headcanons. They might not completely line up with what’s going to be canon in the final game. These are just what’s currently canon for the Sunshine in Hell continuity and what feels right to me personally when it comes to the characters.

I say currently canon since stuff changes as I develop things and play with the characters more. They’ve definitely evolved since I first played the demo. Heck, they’ve even evolved since I started working on this post due to how long it’s taken me to get this finally finished.

Since this post will be using official/development art to help illustrate my points at times, I want to give my friend Sauce full credit for their awesome art and for creating this game with all its wonderful characters and ideas in the first place.

Please consider supporting them and the rest of the SnaccPop Studios team by signing up for the official patreon. Also, consider buying a full size print of this steamy cropped piece of art with a special toy included. It would help out a lot of lovely hard working people and give you access to the many cool posts on there, as well as juicy lore tidbits. A fair number of these posts influenced my headcanons, which you’ll only be able to see if you join up. Remember, don't share anything privately posted on patreon!

While I’m at it, here’s links to the official twitter, tumblr, itch, steam, and kickstarter pages for Sunny Day Jack, which are also places where I got information and inspiration for these smutty headcanons.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

Okay, with disclaimers, promotions, and tags out of the way, let’s get down to the spice.

…

This post won’t encompass every single thing that the characters find arousing/attractive, since there’s no way that I can think of everything for one post, but I’ll write as many kinks, desires, and preferences that come to mind.

First, let’s have some general headcanons that apply to all the main characters. None of them have a preference when it comes to gender. It doesn’t matter what’s in someone’s pants or how they identify. What matters to them is what’s in their partner’s heart and usually that’s the most attractive quality a person can have.

Consent is king! All the characters want consent from their partner/love interest, particularly enthusiastic consent. While some might be pushier than others when it comes to wanting sex/romance, at the end of the day, “no” means “NO.” Everyone’s consent matters.

Now onto the specific characters, starting with the star of the show…

Jack(tor)

Jack has two sides to him - that of the character known as Sunny Day Jack that he’s trying to embody, and that of the actor who used to be known as Joseph Cullman. While he polished the rough edges off of the persona that he presents to the world, at the end of the day, he can’t change his likes and dislikes so easily. A lot of his desires as Jack have been influenced by the desires he had as Joseph… as long as they don’t cause him to break character. There’s a level of what’s “expected” and “acceptable” for him to like as the kid friendly Sunny Day Jack, and what this naughty, naughty yandere really desires deep down inside. We can see evidence of this in his BDSM test results.

Overall, Jack is quite dominant when it comes to his sexual desires. Specifically, he’s a service top, focusing on controlling the scene with his partner’s pleasure in mind. He wants to make his partner feel his love in every sense of the word.

Jack is pansexual/panromantic. He doesn’t discriminate, and can find any sort of body type or personality attractive, but that doesn’t mean that he’s indiscriminately able to fall in love or lust with just anyone. His desire to be loved has led him to make poor choices in his past and has led to him growing attached to people who took advantage of how desperate he was to be loved.

Romantic attraction and sexual attraction are linked when it comes to Jack. He’s not going to desire someone sexually unless he’s experiencing romantic feelings towards them, so usually the two things come together at the same time.

Once Jack falls in love with someone, he is very, very loyal. It will take a lot to get him to let go of these feelings. He’s also very much the jealous type, wanting to monopolize the person he’s in love with, which results in him being fairly clingy. Though, he is willing to compromise on just how clingy he is for the sake of his partner’s wants and needs, provided that he’s not at risk of losing them. At the end of the day, he loves sincerely and wants the person he loves to be happy.

While Jack has claimed in an audio drama Q&A posted on patreon that he theoretically might be open to entering a polyamorous relationship, ultimately, what he really wants is a closed monogamous relationship. He might have lots of love in his heart to give to as many people as will accept it and him, but at the end of the day, he can’t stand the idea of losing someone who actually loves him, particularly the person he loves the most. As I’ve mentioned in past headcanon posts about Jack getting into a poly relationship, (which you can read here and here) I don’t think it would be a healthy balanced relationship between all parties if he were to go into a poly relationship, and as such I think he’s better suited to a single partner.

That isn’t to say that I don’t think Jack would refuse to have sex with someone besides his partner… provided that his partner is the one who wants him to do so. He might not want it himself, but he is willing to consent to it provided his partner is there to watch him do it. He’s willing to consent to quite a lot of things for the sake of love, even if he dislikes them or it makes him uncomfortable. After all, if he’s willing to kill for the sake of his love, there’s a lot of other unsavory things that he’ll be willing to do.

As shown in this early development art by Sauce, Jack isn’t exactly happy to encourage his rival to hurt themselves, as we see from his forced smile, but he’ll do what he must for the sake of keeping his sunshine. Even though this is technically not-canon, it has helped shape my idea of how going down this path causes damage to his psyche and isn’t something he would want if he could avoid it.

In a lot of ways, Jack is a sexual chameleon, eager to please his partner. While he is keen to try different things and experiment in the bedroom, he won’t push any kink that his partner doesn’t want or reacts badly to. Sure, he’ll attempt to convince them to give something a try when it comes to a kink that excites him if they express reluctance, and he’ll want to know what’s wrong so he can fix it or otherwise accommodate them if possible, but at the end of the day, he won’t ever force anything onto his partner. Their pleasure is his pleasure.

Jack is addicted to his partner’s love, attention, desire, pleasure, and validation above all else. This is why he thrives on hearing his partner praise him and tell him just how much they love him. Words of affirmation is his primary love language, as we’ve seen with how ready he is to shower his sunshine with words of love, and how much it meant to him that his sunshine verbally confirms that they love him.

Jack also gets excited by the idea of others seeing him being loved so much by his partner, which is where his exhibitionist kink comes in. He’s the one who is special to his sunshine, not anyone else. They can only watch with envious eyes while he shows them exactly what they’re missing out on. It’s quite a turn on to show the world just how much he’s loved, that he’s the only one special enough to be loved by his sunshine like this. Only he deserves his partner’s love, and only he can make his sunshine feel this good and loved. He would have sex in public before an audience with his sunshine if his partner consented to it, provided that it’s made clear to everyone involved that he’s the only one his partner truly loves and needs more than anyone else.

Another factor that plays into his exhibitionism is his desire not to be forgotten. His past as Joseph is full of moments where that left him feeling discarded and unlovable. The more people who focus on him, the less likely he is to be forgotten.

Cuckolding is definitely something Jack hates, at least if he’s the one being forced to watch his partner have sex with someone else. Even if other people are involved during sex, he needs to be his partner’s primary focus. If he’s the most important person to his partner, then he can at least tolerate others’ involvement. He doesn’t want to have sex with someone that he’s not in love with (or at least not strongly emotionally connected to romantically), but if it made his partner happy, he would do it for their sake… though he would need them to shower him with love and encouragement the entire time.

However, if Jack is the one cuckolding someone else, like, say, Ian… now that’s a different story. Tied to the degrader kink, Jack wants to show that he’s more worthy than others of his sunshine’s love. If his rivals are writhing in envy and can see they don’t deserve Alice like he does, well that’s pretty darn exciting. It’s why he’ll be a poor winner and make sure that all his rivals are very much aware who Alice chose instead of them.

Yes, this means that, just like Jack is going to make sure that Shaun overhears him making love to Alice (as I’ve mentioned in previous posts), he’s going to make sure Ian knows that her pretty moans are only for Jack, now and forever. While the incident with Shaun is Jack marking his territory to prevent a possible rival from getting any ideas, with Ian it’s far more personal. Jack wants to make sure Ian feels worthless and inferior to him in every way. I haven’t decided exactly how he’ll go about this, but hopefully he won’t take it too far, hahaha.

Anyway, ultimately, when it comes to involving other people besides his partner, Jack would rather have an audience rather than additional participants: they can look, listen, and envy, but they can’t touch.

At the end of the day though, his partner has a lot of sway in this matter if others are involved in their sex life… for better or for worse.

While love and sex are closely tied in Jack’s mind, he can still perform sexually without romantic attachment, though he would prefer not to. Back before he was an actor, when he was homeless after running away from home, he had to do things that he wasn’t proud of just to survive, which included performing sex acts on a transactional basis. He was used, and he knew full well that he was being used, but he did what he could to survive life on the streets.

This is part of why Jack prefers to be the one dominating. He wants control over his sexuality in a way that he couldn’t have when sex work sometimes was the only thing that kept him from starving to death. Sex workers don’t tend to be treated well by their clients, especially if they’re a homeless drifter without any support network.

Jack did attempt to find love in the past, but oftentimes he was just exploited for his body, which led to toxic relationships similar to the Tragedy of [Redacted] theory in one of my first headcanon posts. His desperate desire to be loved was unfortunately taken advantage of, which led to unpleasant experiences. Sometimes he fell for someone’s charms and actually believed that they actually cared for him, only for that person to just want a quick fuck and not a real relationship, which stomped all over his heart and made him wonder what more he could have done to “deserve” to be loved…

Once Jack became an actor, he went from being ignored to getting too much attention… and all of it shallow, just focused on his body and fame. The interview with Dan was a sore spot for him because he was used in many ways, by people who only saw him as a sex object to use then discard and not as a human who desperately wished to be loved.

This is why Jack’s feelings for Alice are so strong. Due to their connection, he can literally feel that she cares about him in a way that he never could with anyone else. With how much he’s always craved such a connection with someone, their bond has given him reassurance that he never got to experience while alive. He can feel when he pleases her and when he makes her flustered. He can tell when she’s upset and has an easier time spotting when he’s making a mistake with her. There’s security in knowing her feelings for him, and that those feelings are sincere.

The connection also allows Jack to feel what Alice is experiencing physically to some extent, which includes sexual pleasure. For a service top like him who gets off on his partner’s pleasure, it’s addicting to be able to literally feel the pleasure that he’s giving her. He knows when he’s doing well, and he can learn quickly how best to pleasure her. He wants more and more of all of these wonderful feelings this connection with Alice gives to him, so he’ll do whatever it takes to please her so that he can feel more of her love.

While Jack has a huge exhibitionist kink, and the idea of an audience watching him make love to Alice excites him, at the same time he wants to lock her up away from the rest of the world so that they can’t take her away from him. He needs her. He loves her. His very existence depends on her. What she gives him is far too precious to risk losing for any brief moment of pleasure.

As we’ve seen in this development art… Jack would prefer it if it was just him and his sunshine… forever. Between his past and being trapped in the tape, there’s a desperation to him now to not lose Alice and everything she’s given him… and woe be it to anyone who tries to take his sunshine away.

After being trapped in the tape and suffering a hellish fate for 40 years without rest, Jack has become touch starved and clingy. He was love/touch starved even before his death, but the tape made it so much worse. He would be very happy if Alice wanted to hold onto him 24/7. He views having a piece of his soul inside of Alice as similar to getting a hug from her all the time, and vice-versa with the piece of her that she gave to him. Although that piece of her soul is the most precious thing he possesses, he can’t help but be greedy and want more and more of her. He’ll take as much as she’ll give him.

As one might expect, Jack isn’t keen on being separated from Alice for too long. In the past, he could handle giving his partner space for several days if they needed it, but going a full day without his sunshine is unbearable in the present. It was especially rough in the beginning when their relationship was still new, and their connection was fragile.

It just gets so cold without his sunshine…

The sensory deprivation Jack experienced in the tape affects him as well. He’s more sensitive to stimuli than he was before. This makes him so much more aware of the world, especially what he can and can’t interact with. This is especially the case when it comes to his sunshine.

Really, a sunshine that keeps Jack at a distance would just make his neediness worse, as he literally can’t interact with anything else. Sure he can see his surroundings and respond to them, but he needs to be closer to his sunshine to interact with them, including his sunshine. If all he can touch is his sunshine for a long time, it just makes his neediness to be close to them all the worse.

Fortunately, Alice pretty much accepted Jack of being capable of touching and interacting with things right away, so it’s not as bad for him as it could have been... but let’s face it, Jack’s need for sensory stimulation is going to be pretty bad regardless.

Jack is hyper aware of everything about his sunshine - the feeling of her skin, how warm each part of her body is, how soft... All the little folds and curves. He memorizes the sensation of her fingers wrapped around his and just how small she is when he holds her in his arms, completely surrounding her.

Jack is so aware of her scent too, so very, very aware. Most of the time Alice smells of vanilla cupcakes and sugar cookies due to her shampoo and deodorant, but sometimes she puts on perfume or switches things up. He notices it right away when it changes, but most of all he notices how her distinct scent without any perfumes affects it. He’s smelled her products directly - out of curiosity he swears - but it’s not the same. It’s nice... but it’s not her.

Smelling Alice’s pillows and clothes... now there’s where he gets his hit when he can’t be close enough to breathe her in. At the start, she gave him one of her pillows that smelled just like her. She never really gets it back, and when Jack gets sneakier with slipping away to take care of himself, he brings the pillow with him. He buries his face in it as he jerks himself off to thoughts of her, imagining that he’s buried his face in her chest or between her thighs.

When Jack discovers that Alice has a pillow that she props between her legs to sleep more comfortably, he can’t help but imagine her humping that pillow imagining it’s him. She doesn’t, of course, but the fantasy gets to him, and he can’t help but be the one to enact it, imagining that he’s thrusting into where this lucky pillow usually rests. He made sure to clean it up thoroughly afterwards so she doesn’t notice, but seeing her sleep with it after that drives him crazy.

Jack knows using her pillows and clothes like that is wrong, but it’s fine, right? He’s being patient, waiting for the day that Alice is ready to do these things with him. He knows it’ll happen. He can feel how much she cares about him. With every day they get closer... and she’s slowly starting to see just how perfect they are for each other too. One day, he won’t need to settle for a pillow. One day, he’ll be thrusting his cock into all of her holes, listening to her pretty moans that are only for him.

And, well, he’s right, basically. Jack is a very, very happy man when that happens, and he makes sure Alice doesn’t regret choosing him. He’s going to make sure that she enjoys every second of their lovemaking.

Until then, Jack has his fantasies of what it’ll be like. He fantasizes about Alice on a daily basis, often lewd fantasies but sometimes wholesome and sweet like imagining them getting married. He’ll try his best to only imagine what he’s seen of of her so far without assuming what he’ll find underneath her clothes. It doesn’t matter what equipment she has after all, she’s beautiful and perfect to him just as she is. He laser focuses on every new inch of skin he sees, searing it into his mind forever and adding it to his fantasies.

Sometimes it feels to Jack as if Alice is teasing him as well. He would be convinced that she is if he couldn’t pick up on her thoughts. She’s genuinely oblivious how sexy she looks wearing only a too thin t-shirt with no bra, especially when she stretches. She doesn’t notice how her clothes ride up when she stretches or how he drinks her in when she does. He can’t help but notice just how flexible she is and imagine how he might be able to make her body bend around his in various delicious angles. Until that day though, he won’t let anything slip by his notice.

This leads into Jack’s voyeurism kink. This is pretty closely tied to the exhibitionist kink. He loves to show off his sexy body and see the desire in his partner’s eyes. He wants them to know what he has to offer, how good he can make his partner feel, and how good they make him feel. He also enjoys seeing his partner show off their body to him and watching them get off… provided that it’s not with someone else. Watching someone else make his partner moan isn’t his idea of a fun time. Sure his partner is sexy, but… it leaves him feeling insecure. What if they like the other person better? He can’t risk it. They should only be moaning because of him.

So when it comes to voyeurism, Jack would rather watch his partner get themselves off for his pleasure, preferably moaning his name or even begging him to take them. He would even enjoy watching his partner play with themselves in a deliberate effort to tease and entice him. Brat taming is something he enjoys, and making sure his partner knows who’s really in control of their pleasure as he teases them even more than they teased him is quite enticing to him.

Teasing is something that’s all in good fun, as far as Jack is concerned… as long as it remains playful of course. The degrader kink in his case isn’t done with insults like calling his partner a slut or other such degrading insults, unless they explicitly wanted him to do that of course. Rather, it’s the excitement of making his partner feel flustered and overwhelmed, even embarrassed, that’s turning him on. He knows what they’re weak against and uses it against them to leave them a blushing mess, overwhelmed by how he knows them inside and out. No one else could ever be as close to them or know them as well as he can.

An example would be Jack praising Alice for being so wet when he fingers her while she’s standing in the camera’s blind spot at Popov’s, even though she’s worried about being caught doing something so lewd at work. With how flustered she gets in general, and especially when risking getting caught by others, it can be counted as degrading to be praised for doing such a lewd act in a semi-public place. However, he is not making her feel like she’s wrong for being aroused by something she finds embarrassing.

Jack never intends to make his partner feel bad in any way. He only wants to make them feel good. Coaxing them into doing things that get them aroused and overwhelmed in a good way is exciting for him. That’s why he’s also a big fan of overstimulation and orgasm denial. He loves making his partner orgasm repeatedly and watching them come undone. If he can leave his partner a babbling mess, begging him for more or that it’s too much, while clearly enjoying every second of what he’s doing to them, he feels so needed and wanted.

Being teased can be fun as well, though Jack prefers to be teased playfully by a partner who acts a bit bratty, pushing him to work for the prize of satisfying them both. His partner proposing a challenge for him to overcome is thrilling when he can shatter their expectations and leave them totally at his mercy.

Another way Jack enjoys being teased by his partner is if they try to “escape” him, acting as prey to allow him to indulge in his predator kink and chase them down. The idea of hunting his partner, searching for them wherever they run or hide, snatching them up, and getting a good taste of his prey as his prize is delightful. Adding in a bit of bondage as well by tying up his cute little prey adds an extra thrill. Then he can tease them with praise, touch, and affection until he tames them, leaving them begging him for more.

Sure, Jack technically has a cheat mode when it comes to finding Alice due to their connection, since he can sense her wherever she is through it, but that doesn’t mean hide and seek can’t still be fun. He can just pretend that he can’t sense where she’s hiding, really heightening up the tension as he pretends to overlook her hiding spot, coming so close, putting her on edge of being found, only to pass her by. It would be a game in and of itself to tease her with the threat of almost catching her until finally he’s ready to pounce and claim his cute little prey.

Jack isn’t exactly opposed to reversing the game, with him acting as the prey, but he would quickly turn it back around on his partner. With how little control he had in his life while alive, a part of him rebels against being controlled by anyone… though his sunshine is a bit of a unique case.

Alice didn’t have to save him from hell. That was her choice. Jack might have been willing to give her anything if she saved him, but she didn’t actually want anything from him except to save him. It’s for that reason that he’ll do anything for her. He might not want to give up control, but if it was for her sake, he would let her take total control of him as long as she loves him, needs him, and never forgets him.

Really, Jack would find it cute to imagine Alice trying to hunt him down or act dominant with him in the bedroom, especially since he knows that he would soon turn the tables on her and turn her into his adorable prey. It would be more like brat taming for him in that case, teasing and tempting her until she was too flustered to continue trying to keep control, submitting to him and his love~

However, Jack only enjoys predplay if it remains play. It stops being fun if his partner is genuinely scared or in distress from the behavior. It’s the same with any kink really. A good dominant pays attention to the submissive’s comfort and needs, and he’ll be sure to satisfy all of his sunshine’s needs.

Although Jack has been shown in the test to prefer being a sadist, he’s not actually a fan of making his partner feel pain. Back when he was still alive, he could be more comfortable with various forms of mild sadism, such as spanking or hair pulling, but in the present, the idea of hurting his sunshine even in such minor ways is unthinkable. He would only be able to handle dealing out pain to his sunshine if that’s what they sincerely found pleasurable, since he would want to fulfill their needs. Of course, he would be checking in on how they’re doing a bit excessively to make sure that he never gets too tough.

Rather, the form of sadism that Jack enjoys is leaving marks on his partner’s body, particularly kiss and bite marks. It’s physical proof of his love on their skin that shows the world just how much he loves them. It’s not to the point of spilling blood or leaving a permanent scar, just leaving behind evidence of their lovemaking. It’s proof that they’re his. He’s the one who made those marks, and anyone who sees them will know his partner chose him and not them. He won’t bite unless his partner enjoys it of course. If they do, he’s going to get a taste of them and make sure it leaves a mark behind.

I mean look at this screencap. Jack really wants to be nibbling on his sunshine instead of his lip.

This is especially true in the present. Although Jack can’t stand the idea of hurting his sunshine, seeing Alice covered in hickies and bite marks makes him feel more real. He’s left irrefutable evidence of his existence on her skin, and he makes sure to adorn her in as many as she’ll allow, especially in places that she can’t easily cover up. It gives him a thrill to think that anyone who sees her would see those marks and realize that she doesn’t need them. She chose him. She’s his just as much as he’s hers. The world might not be able to see him (yet), but he’s proving that he’s real by showing the world that he’s claimed his sunshine.

Another way that Jack wants to mark his claim on his sunshine is with his cum love. Seeing his partner as a sweaty, overstimulated mess, adorned in a pearl necklace he made for them with a dripping cream pie between their legs just does it for him. He would love to make a mess of his sunshine and admire his handiwork afterwards.

This leads to Jack having a breeding kink. When he was alive, it was more mild than it is in the present. Although being a parent was a bit intimidating for him back then due to his toxic upbringing, he always hoped that he would find a loving partner and be a father someday. Granted, a breeding kink doesn’t necessarily have to lead to procreation, but simply the act of seeding his partner can be just as fun~

With the world being unable to see/hear/touch him, Jack feels more of an urge to leave his mark. Since Alice is the only one that he can interact with, that makes him want to leave his mark on her body in any way that she’ll allow. Getting her pregnant is the ultimate proof that he’s real, and even before she is ready to have kids with him, he’s fantasized about it countless times. In the past, he was thinking of siring or adopting one kid, maybe two, but in the present he wants more kids than that - as many as his sunshine will agree to. The thought of her pregnant, watching her tummy grow larger with his child drives him crazy in the best ways.

Jack is open to experimentation and trying new things, particularly at the request of his partner. He’ll do his best to accommodate his partner’s needs, whatever they might be, even if they’re not to his tastes… provided it doesn’t put them or their relationship at risk. More extreme kinks… he’ll be willing to give them a shot, but if they’re too dangerous or damaging, he’ll try to pump the brakes or at least talk about why his partner is interested in it so that they can reach a compromise that’s healthier for both of them.

As shown in the demo, Jack is very vocal in bed. He showers his partner with praise. He can talk dirty as well, though he could only swear while he was still alive. In the present, his dirty talk is mostly innuendo, as he can’t bring himself to swear anymore. Sunny Day Jack would never swear after all, it would be utterly unthinkable for a kids TV show character. If his partner wants him to degrade them by using specific insults and terms, he’ll indulge them as best as he’s able, but he’ll make sure to dish out extra praise and affection during aftercare so that he can remind them just how much they mean to him. He thinks the world of his sunshine, and he wouldn’t want to risk them actually believing that he really does think such horrible things about them.

Jack is the king of aftercare. If his partner needs anything, he’ll get it even if he’s tired. Need water or a snack? He’s on it. Need cuddles? Oh you bet he’s all over that. Need help getting cleaned up? Don’t worry, he’ll carry his partner to the bath and change the messy bedding for them. Sore? He’ll be sure to gently massage those tense muscles into submission.

Jack’s mouth isn’t just good with words. He has quite the talent for oral play. He loves using his mouth all over his partner’s body, particularly where they’re most sensitive, or where they need extra love. His favorite place to kiss, besides their lips, is their throat, as he can feel his partner’s moans vibrate against his lips, giving him that little bit of extra feedback that he’s doing a good job.

However, the sexiest part of the body for Jack is his partner’s stomach, though he loves every inch of his sunshine. A soft round tummy just does it for the guy, though all stomach shapes are lovely. He just loves having a partner who is soft and perfect for cuddling. He enjoys having a softer partner who he can protect, especially if they’re smaller than him. Caging his soft partner underneath him makes him feel secure, and he’ll keep them trapped in his arms all night long if they let him.

Jack’s favorite positions are ones where he’s facing his partner. He wants to see the expressions they make and kiss them as they make love. He favors the mating press in particular, as it allows him to penetrate his partner as deeply as possible and hit just the right spots to make them scream his name and see stars. He wants to be totally surrounded by his sunshine’s warmth and feel their love all around him.

Jack has a very high libido, so he wants to have sex as often as possible. He would want to do it every day, even multiple times a day if possible, masturbating and fantasizing about his sunshine if not. His stamina was just a bit higher than average when he was alive, but now that he’s a supernatural entity with powers, he can keep going with a very short refractory period. If his sunshine lets him, he could make love to them for hours. Of course, he’ll be considerate about the difference in their sex drives and energy levels.

Being an actor, Jack is excellent at roleplay. In fact, he might be able to get into the part too well at times. In the past, it was easier for him to get carried away with a role (which plays a part in why he’s Jack now instead of Joseph), but in the present, if he goes too far with it, that could lead to him mentally crashing back down when he realizes that he’s acting out of character for Sunny Day Jack. If he can justify Sunny Day Jack playing such a role, he doesn’t have to suffer such dissonance, so any roleplay in the present will have a bit of a primary colored tint to it.

Of course, the more relaxed Jack gets in his relationship with his sunshine, the easier it’ll be for him to slip out of character and be more himself. If these “out of character” moments never result in anything bad and his sunshine enjoys who he is when he’s at his most open and vulnerable… then maybe he’ll be able to be more comfortable acting more like himself instead of the character he wishes he was…

This is the goal for Sunshine in Hell. Although Jack is going to try his best to stay in character as Sunny Day Jack at the start, as he spends time with Alice and the two of them grow closer, he’s able to make himself more vulnerable to her, less guarded. He’s able to experiment more, indulge in the desires he has that Sunny Day Jack would never even think about. Eventually, he’ll be able to be someone who isn’t the character that he portrays, but someone comfortable in his own skin, with someone who loves him as the flawed man that he is and not as the perfect idol that he wishes he was.

I think we’ll wrap things up for Jack on that heartwarming note… especially since his entry has ballooned into 12 14 pages at this point, hahaha. I might have more thoughts in the future, but let’s show the other characters some love too, shall we?

Speaking of love, let’s talk about Jack’s sunshine, specifically my version of the MC for this erotic yandere romance game.

Alice

As I’ve mentioned before in other headcanon rambles, Alice is on the aro/ace spectrum. While she does experience horny thoughts/urges, she doesn’t actually desire someone romantically or sexually unless she’s known them for a while and has developed a bond with them. She can objectively see that someone is attractive and admire them, even feel flustered by the attention that they give to her, but these are platonic feelings. It’s only after she’s been friends with someone and opens up to them that she might develop romantic feelings for them. Even then that’s not always a guarantee. Sexual attraction then follows only after she’s made a deep romantic connection with that person, and only with that person. This would make her orientation demi-romantic, demi-sexual.

Because it takes such deep trust and closeness for Alice to fall in love with someone, when she falls in love, she falls hard… for better and for worse.

Alice is strictly monogamous. She can’t bear the idea of sharing her partner with another person, and she’ll do all she can to serve their needs to the best of her ability. She’s also fairly clingy with her partner, as her love language is primarily physical touch. She loves holding onto her partner as much as possible, playing with their hands or hair, caressing their face, nuzzling into their touch, and in general just cuddling up to them as much as they’ll allow. She can also get silly with her affection, licking or nibbling on her partner playfully if they allow her, and writing words or symbols on their skin with her finger.

Of course, Alice is careful to be gentle when nipping her partner since she has slightly larger fangs than the average person. If she bit down hard, she could draw blood with those fangs… if her partner is into that and convinces her that they really want her to do some damage of course.

Alice is only comfortable with physical touch with someone if she trusts them and has a positive connection with them. If she doesn’t have some level of trust, being touched puts her on edge, even if it’s something as casual as a pat on the back.

The part of her partner’s body that Alice finds most attractive is their chest. Big, small, flat, soft… they’re all beautiful, and she loves to bury her face into her partner’s chest and listen to their heartbeat as often as she can, feeling them breathe as she holds them close. She also enjoys hands, snuggling into them, touching them, lacing their fingers together. It makes her feel so wanted to feel her partner’s hands reaching out to hold her.

Although Alice tends to favor being more submissive in the bedroom, she’s a service bottom, wanting to make sure her partner feels good. She’s not content to be a pillow princess, just lying there and letting things happen to her. She wants to do whatever she can to make her partner feel satisfied and happy… even if that means doing things that she isn’t exactly comfortable with.

Alice struggles to reject anything that her partner suggests, even if it makes her uncomfortable. She wants so badly to be a good partner who is worthy of the person she loves, since she has self-confidence issues. A lifetime of fat shaming from many sources, including society at large, has made her hate how her body looks, and she feels ugly. This is something she struggles with and though she has been called beautiful, she can’t bring herself to really believe it when the majority of people have called her ugly. It didn’t help that she was treated as a weirdo by her peers and isolated or ignored. This has led to Alice feeling a need to “make up” for how “unattractive” she is with acts of service for her partner in the bedroom.

This has led to unfortunate incidents in her sex life. Alice pushed herself to have sex before she was ready, with a partner who didn’t know what he was doing. It was clumsy, even painful, and though she tried not to think about it, she was reminded of the SA she experienced as a teenager. This was not anyone’s fault, but ignoring the warning signs of a trauma trigger can be pretty devastating.

Needless to say, Alice and Ian’s first time was… rough, and full of apologies from both of them, along with a lot of guilt. I touched on how difficult their sex life was in previous posts before, such as this one. Sadly, their sex life played a part in why their relationship turned sour.

Sex with Ian was mostly Alice servicing him with handjobs and blowjobs, with penetrative sex coming infrequently. Unfortunately, Alice didn’t really enjoy the penetrative sex, as Ian tended to go too rough with her, and they both had the misconception that pain was always involved at the start of penetration for the person being penetrated (if not for the whole experience.) Sadly, by this point in their relationship, Alice was having a hard time voicing any complaints that might make Ian feel bad or like he was wrong in some way. She mistakenly believed that she was the problem for not really enjoying or getting off on the experience. After all, there was pleasure along with the pain, and penetrative sex was what all sex led up to, right? Was it even sex without it?

Penetrative sex is so glorified in media, that Alice believes sex is incomplete without it, as if she’s denying that full connection of love with her partner if she doesn’t do it. It might be painful, but she wants that deep connection with the person she loves. Plus, Ian would always be so eager and excited for it. She found him just so cute, and it made her feel good that he desired her so much that he couldn’t hold back. It might have been painful, but it was worth it to be the only person in the world who could drive him so crazy with desire. It was so nice of him to think of her when he wanted to try out a new technique that he was sure would make her feel good, since, ho boy, did the lady in the porn ecchi enjoy it!

Unfortunately, Alice learned over time being with Ian that getting sex techniques from porn really isn’t a good point of reference. That’s why she eventually started reading articles giving advice on sex-friendly websites to get a better sense about real sex, rather than the fictionalized version depicted in porn.

But, hey, at least Ian was happy. Alice took joy in his happiness and satisfaction, and enjoyed the cuddling they did in the afterglow the most. Cuddling, kisses, listening to his satisfied sighs, and hearing how much he loved her were what she enjoyed the most about their lovemaking.

Of course, Alice found that same satisfaction with just cuddling and a nice make out session without sex involved.

Sadly, like a lot of people with little experience, Alice is under the mistaken assumption that penetration hurts at first, but soon goes away. This is an exceedingly common trope in hentai/ecchi where the bottom, regardless of gender, always feels pain at the start of being penetrated but then pleasure makes the pain disappear at some point. It’s treated as expected in this form of media, something unavoidable that must be tolerated for the sake of enjoying sex. Heck, for some people, pain during penetration is a feature of sex, not a bug.

This is why when Alice and Jack eventually have penetrative sex, the fact that it doesn’t hurt even a little bit catches her off-guard. Not that she’ll complain, obviously. This results in making her more enthusiastic about that form of sex than she ever thought that she could be.

Alice does not enjoy pain, at all. It’s not sexy to her to be spanked, choked, insulted, or to be otherwise made uncomfortable and used. She’ll try out something that she might dislike for the sake of her partner’s kinks, and she’ll tolerate things that are painful if her partner feels good, but that doesn’t mean she’ll necessarily get much enjoyment out of the experience.

Inflicting pain or insults on her partner is something that Alice doesn’t care for either. She’s too empathetic, and the idea of doing harm to her partner, whether verbal or physical, even if they take pleasure in it, makes her feel exceedingly anxious. She prefers being gentle, sweet-talking her partner and cuddling with them.

The most Alice would want to do is playful teasing and leaving kiss marks along with gentle love bites. She could be convinced to bite harder, scratch, or spank if her partner was really into that, but she’s far too much of a marshmallow to handle any sort of hard sadism or masochism. Soft, cuddly, vanilla lovemaking full of sweet words and praise is what makes her feel happiest.

Praise is Alice’s biggest weakness. Whether it’s platonic, romantic, or sexual, she gets easily overwhelmed when she’s praised. She loves it, but struggles to accept it due to her low self-esteem. It makes her happy to know she’s doing a good job, and it encourages her to do more when it comes to pleasuring her partner.

Getting positive attention, compliments, gifts, and in general being treated special is something Alice struggles with, even with her partner. It takes her a while to really believe it. Ian actually did a world of good for her self-confidence… before he completely destroyed it when he cheated on her, making it worse than it ever was. Jack has his work cut out for him.

Alice masturbates often, but as a stress relief more than anything else. It’s less about being horny or desiring someone else and more about self-care. An orgasm can be very relaxing after a stressful day. She bought toys to help her do this more efficiently, only rarely taking time out to enjoy masturbation as anything more than a quick stress release. Of course, she finds it more fun to play with toys when she’s sharing them with her partner.

After making the connection to Jack, Alice finds her libido increasing because she is picking up on his horny feelings. It leads to many confusing moments where she wonders why she’s feeling horny out of nowhere far more often than she normally did before, and she does make the connection between those feelings and Jack… but attributes it to him just being that attractive in every sense of the word, which only further confuses her feelings towards him in the beginning.

Once Alice and Jack start having sex, her libido increases substantially due to this connection and how much she enjoys the experience. He’s so attentive to her needs and is so eager to praise her when he pleases her or she pleases him that it’s hard not to get addicted to their lovemaking sessions. While she and Ian would have sex once or twice a week on average, usually to satisfy his desires and not hers, she winds up enthusiastically wanting to have sex with Jack almost daily once they finally reach that point in their relationship.

Being restrained is a complicated kink for Alice. She’s never considered herself one for bondage, and, if anything, she doesn’t think that she’ll like it. Her SA trauma has to do with being restrained against her will, so if she feels trapped during sex, it can cause her to panic. Ian has accidentally triggered this trauma in the past.

Being held down or confined by her partner isn’t so much the issue in and of itself. Alice enjoys the security of being completely engulfed in her partner’s arms, safe and secure. There are times when she would seek it out, loving the feeling of her partner lying on top of her like a weighted blanket. It’s when they won’t let her go even when she indicates she wants them to that the discomfort immediately sets in. Although she tries to power through the feeling and remind herself that she trusts her partner and that they won’t hurt her like the people who committed SA against her, and they care about her… trauma is not always that easy to reason through.

This can be a bit of an issue when you have a partner who has a tendency to lose control of his urges and refuses to let you go or come up for air until he’s satisfied.

Needless to say, this led to moments full of guilt and apologies from both sides between Ian and Alice. This, as you might expect, was one of the big contributors to why they didn’t have sex all that often.

Restraining her partner… now that’s something Alice would be surprised to find that she enjoys. Having her partner tied up and helpless as she lovingly pays attention to their body, maybe even blindfolded so they don’t know where she’s going to touch or kiss next would be exciting.

I think I just had an idea for another short fic to write sometime. Better make a note of this for later.

Ahem, moving on… Alice isn’t one for exhibitionism. She’s a very private person overall, and with her self-esteem issues, she would rather have anything more physical than a kiss or hug be kept private. She doesn’t want to have to think or worry about other people when intimate with her partner, preferring to just focus on her beloved and the intimate moment that they’re sharing. Since she can only get sexual with someone she trusts deeply, she doesn’t want to involve other people, even as an audience.

Sadly, Jack isn’t going to be able to indulge in his exhibitionism kink to the fullest with Alice because of this. Though having sex in risky places where they could get caught is a fair compromise that she winds up enjoying way more than she ever thought she would. She wouldn’t enjoy getting caught though, and it would take a lot of coaxing to get her to try again if that happened, but fortunately Jack is a very sneaky ghost(?) who knows a few tricks to make sure that no one will interrupt when he’s showing love to his sunshine.

Alice’s favorite position is missionary. She loves being held by her partner and looking into their eyes, seeing the love they have for her and how good they’re feeling. She loves the feeling of their body on top of hers like a warm weighted blanket. She loves watching them bite their lip and strain themselves to hold on, or roll their eyes up towards the ceiling from pleasure. Watching her partner’s face and knowing that she’s the one making them feel good makes her feel good in turn. She loves it when they look at her with love and desire, like she’s the only person in the world they could ever feel this way towards.

Face to face positions in general are the ones Alice prefers, though she gets anxious about any position that puts her on top. She’s chubby, and she worries about her weight being too much for her partner. For example, if they tell her to sit on their face and that they want to be crushed by her thighs, she’ll be very skeptical that it’ll end well. It’s something that would take a lot of gentle coaxing to get her to try it, and reassurance that they enjoyed doing it afterwards.

Although Alice’s worries limits her in the amount of positions she’s interested in trying, she’s actually capable of doing a lot of them. Despite being chubby, she’s very flexible, able to do vertical splits and put her ankle around her head, to name a few. This makes yoga the ideal way for her to keep in shape. She isn’t confident enough to work out at a gym, but she doesn’t mind stretching with friends or a partner. She takes pride in her flexibility and her excellent sense of balance, not yet thinking about how this ability could be used to great effect in the bedroom.

Needless to say, those attracted to Alice can be treated to quite a show when watching her do yoga. Jack especially is eager to encourage her to exercise often and is only too happy to help her get into the harder poses. He looks up just how to do them so he knows where he can put his hands just right to help her. Before they’re lovers, it’s always so tempting for him to just “slip” and touch her someplace a bit naughtier... but he respects her consent and boundaries. He won’t touch her someplace unless she wants him to, no matter how badly he wants to put his hands and mouth on every inch of her body.

Naturally, once they become lovers, yoga sessions get a bit spicy. Alice has to wonder if Jack is really eager for her to work out to help her stay fit or if he just wants to experiment with positions. Still, it’s a very pleasurable incentive that encourages her to work out more often. It also encourages her to intentionally tease him with her stretches once she grows more confident in their physical intimacy, going into a playful back and forth that she knows is going to end up with him eventually snapping from the tension, stripping of her workout clothes and taking her against the yoga mat.

Teasing her partner and encouraging them to lose control is something Alice can appreciate. It was a bit risky when it came to Ian since when he lost control it could be painful or even suffocating, so she always had to be cautious about how far to push and be prepared for fallout. With Jack though, he’s always so mindful of her comfort no matter how wild she drives him. That allows her to just cut loose and tease him to her heart’s content, knowing that he’ll never hurt her and it’s only going to feel good.

Driving her lover into losing control over their desire makes Alice feel sexy, beautiful. She wants the person she loves and desires to need her so badly that they can’t think of anyone else. She wants to be irreplaceable. She thought that she found that with Ian, so it was worth the pain, but his cheating proved that she was mistaken. Fortunately, Jack will be all too happy to make sure she knows how special she is and how there’s no one else in the world he could ever want, need, or love more than her.

In general, Alice is very vanilla when it comes to her kinks. She favors the emotional connection between her and her partner, the love and trust they share. That’s why she can only have sex with someone if she feels like she can fully trust that person. After Ian cheated, she couldn’t have sex with him again even when he wanted it, which strained their attempts to repair their relationship and helped her realize that things had gotten too toxic between them to try and go back to the way they were.

Overall, Alice is a very uncertain lover when it comes to her own pleasure or anything that might bring discomfort to her partner. She has an easier time focusing on their pleasure and getting enjoyment out of making them feel good. It’s easy for her to forget about herself in favor of her partner’s pleasure even if she’s uncomfortable, which is why she responds better to a partner who makes sure to stay mindful of her needs during the activities rather than get distracted by their own pleasure.

Speaking of a partner who gets carried away by his own pleasure…

Ian

Ian is someone who was very sheltered by his very strict religious upbringing. In his house, sexual desires were seen as shameful. Even masturbating was treated as a sin. Though he tried not to give in to his urges, he succumbed to his desires more often than not, and it made him feel weird. He loved the pleasure he felt from masturbating and the relief it gave him, but he “knew” that he was being “sinful” by doing so, which would leave him filled with shame and guilt afterwards. This would lead to a lot of repression when it comes to his sexuality. It didn’t help that his peers treated him like a weirdo and made fun of his looks/behavior/tastes, isolating him further.

Because of his upbringing, Ian always had a clear picture of what he was supposed to do to have a successful future. He needed to find one person, get married, have kids, and have a lucrative career. His mother pushed him towards a straight relationship in particular - at least when she wasn’t crushing his spirit that finding a partner was impossible for him at all - but he couldn’t help but find guys and non-binary people attractive as well. He has a lot of crushes, both fictional and not, and he has a secret stash of various media full of many waifus, husbandos, and spousus.

Alice was one such person that Ian crushed on, but with her it was far more serious than anyone else. His feelings for his first and only childhood friend were deeper than surface level. They knew each other better than anyone. She was always there for him, supporting him, and making him feel like he wasn’t such a weirdo after all. Her being a girl had nothing to do with how hard he fell for her, though it did make him feel a little less anxious about his mom finding out about their relationship than he would have if his partner wasn’t a girl.

Ian is someone in heavy denial about his desires due to his upbringing. It’s “sinful” to lust after other people, particularly outside of a straight context according to his mother and the scriptures. It’s “sinful” to have lustful thoughts outside of marriage. Heck, even in the confines of marriage, sex is meant only for the sake of procreation. It made him feel weird about desiring people, so he convinced himself that he simply… didn’t. He went into deep denial, telling himself that people were weird, and since he didn’t know them these feelings weren’t something to think about at all. It was easier that way.

Ian knew Alice though, so she became the exception to this taboo he had been taught all his life when she became his partner. For him, it was okay to lust after his partner… at least as much as it could be with anyone. Though his mother insisted lust, even towards his partner, was only selfishly satisfying his manhood in a sinful way, society often said otherwise. Media and their peers made it seem so normal to have sexual urges and want to explore them. Even Alice insisted his feelings were normal and nothing to be ashamed about. He learned more and more about what was normal once he was out from under his mother’s influence and interacted with other people.

While Ian did learn to accept and even embrace the fact that he’s pansexual/panromantic, it’s not so easy to shake the shame related to his sexuality or sex in general thanks to his mother’s toxic influence.

At his house with his mother, even the internet was restricted. Ian didn’t get access to porn until he moved out to college, and even then, that made him feel awkward. He didn’t know how to handle these weird feelings towards strangers, since he was taught that they were sinful and risked damning him to hell. Lusting after fictional characters seemed okay though. That was just a fantasy, playing pretend. Even his mother had romance books that got pretty smutty, though she wailed into him the one time she caught him going through her stash.

This was what led to Ian having a lot of fictional crushes, anime figures, and, of course, ecchi. While the local library didn’t have straight up porn or hentai, it did have more risque manga stories in the form of ecchi, which is why he insists so hard that it’s not porn. The library would never have anything like porn, so it’s not sinful! This means it’s okay that he has a collection of it. He’s not a sinful pervert!

Ecchi has a tendency to really push the boundaries of what can be constituted as porn though, and Ian absorbed all of the sex in those pages like a sponge. The people in the book always looked to be having fun. Sex was something wild and passionate. The people lost control of their desires and enjoyed themselves in a way that he was always denied. Sex was this all-encompassing force of nature in so many stories, not just in ecchi. He was fascinated by it even as he was afraid of those feelings.

Because of this repression, Ian saw himself in these characters who lost themselves in moments of passion as they claimed their lover. This raw animalistic lust was exciting and really resonated with him. Once he started pleasuring himself and forgot about the guilt of his desires, he would lose control in a similar way. He would keep going until he was satisfied, completely losing himself in the experience… only to be hit with guilt once he came down from the high.

With Alice, Ian had an outlet for his sexual desires. She helped him see that these desires weren’t sinful, and she was eager to help him feel good. She made him feel wanted, beautiful, and sexy. With her help, like many things in his life, he gained more confidence in his sexual urges. He explored his sexuality more, both in fiction and with her, though he was far more hesitant and awkward with the latter.

What didn’t help was the mistakes Ian would make… but, in a way, he was used to making mistakes. He was always making mistakes, always blamed by his mother for just about every reason under the sun even if he didn’t actually do anything. All perceived problems were his fault and so he must apologize. Constantly.

Alice supported Ian when he felt sinful, filthy, and sad. She forgave him for his mistakes and even told him he didn’t have to apologize so much. She loved him and he loved her in return for how strong and supportive she was to him.

Ian would try to make amends for his mistakes with apologies, cuddling, and especially with gifts. His primary love language is gift giving, and thanks to the trust fund his absent dad left him, he could give gifts to those he cared about often. He gives friends and especially his partner presents. He even gives his mother presents to let her know that he still loves her despite everything and that he just wants them to actually have a good relationship… however futile that gesture might be.

Although Ian struggles to be vocal about what he wants when it comes to sex and romance, he can be pretty romantic at times… even if he’s got dirty thoughts in mind to go along with it. He knows how romantic a candle lit bedroom with a bed covered in rose petals while sexy jazz plays in the background really sets the mood. Too bad it didn’t actually work out the first time he tried it.

Sadly, Ian was hoping that if he set the mood just right, he and Alice could finally go all the way and lose their virginity to each other. Too bad the mood died a painful death when Shaun walked in instead, and it was a while before Ian got the guts to try that again… at least while Alice was still rooming with Shaun. Initiating sex with her was much easier after they moved into their own place.

I’ve gone over the reasons why I think Ian cheated in previous posts, here, here, here, and here in detail, so I won’t rehash it too deeply this post.

To sum it up - Ian was on his own for the first time in his life when he moved to the performing arts school, without anyone to support him, particularly his partner. He had grown conventionally attractive as he aged, and he was surrounded by peers who shared his interests, which gave him a taste of popularity for the first time. He was given all sorts of new and exciting experiences, meeting all sorts of people who he found attractive. He grew closer to new people, and without his partner around he grew lonely… which led him to giving in to his desires in the worst way possible.

The experience was exciting. The forbidden nature of it actually made the act more enticing due to how repressed Ian was because of his background. It was all “sinful” after all…

Like a lot of people who grew up heavily repressed by religion, Ian finds arousal in things deemed forbidden and sinful. Despite being bullied as a kid, being degraded sexually is something that turns him on. Though he protests about being teased, he enjoys it, even to the point that being called a beast or a sinful slut makes him feel aroused, though he finds such feelings confusing. He likes being commanded and punished by his partner, completely at their mercy and begging them for more.

While this would suggest Ian is a submissive, he’s actually a switch vers. It doesn’t matter who’s doing the penetrating as long as it feels good. Taking control of his partner and rutting into their holes like an animal feels just as good as being taken. He just needs to learn how to better control his urges so he can pay attention to his partner’s needs and comfort to improve taking the dominant role.

Ian is the type of person who gets lost in the pleasure of sex. Once he gets to a certain point, he starts losing his inhibitions, getting more vocal and needy. He’ll praise his partner and beg for more even when he’s the one dominating, growing increasingly needier as the pleasure grows more intense.

The part of the body Ian finds most attractive is the ass. More than once he’s had thoughts of slapping or squeezing his partner’s ass, but was too shy to give into the urge except when actively engaging in sex. Because of this, his favorite position is doggy style, as we can see in this very NSFW picture by Sauce. He loves the way his partner’s ass bounces with each thrust, and he’ll add to the jiggle with the occasional slap once he loses himself in the moment. As he grows more confident in his desires and represses himself less, he’ll consciously want to explore the kink of spanking.

Bondage, both giving and receiving, is something that Ian would want to try, along with some other kinks, but he doesn’t have the courage to initiate it at this time. In general, he struggles to initiate anything related to sex, as that ties into the guilt and shame that was hammered into his upbringing. However, it’s fairly easy for him to get aroused, which would serve as an unintentional way to initiate sex more often than not.

Being an actor, Ian would thrive with roleplay in the bedroom. It would help him pretend to be someone else, someone more confident and lustful. It could help him lose himself in the moment rather than get caught up in his own doubts and insecurities.

Ian struggles with accepting his own sexual desires, which makes it harder for him to communicate with his partner about his needs. This leads to him taking cues from ecchi on what to do, not checking in with his partner like he should, and getting lost in the moment, letting the urges take him where he wants to go. Once he accepts himself as a sexual being and that it’s healthy to feel these desires, his communication difficulties with his partner should improve.

Having a partner who takes the lead is probably ideal for Ian. Being told what to do is something he’s used to, and he feels more confident with guidance. He worries about making mistakes, but if he’s guided through the scene by his partner, he has less reason to worry. In a way, being so good at taking direction is why he makes an excellent actor.

Speaking of direction, how about we switch over to the next love interest on the list?

Shaun

Shaun has a bit of a wild side when it comes to sex. He loves kitten play, both being the kitten and being the master of a sweet sexy kitten. He’ll put his partner in cat ears, a tail with a butt plug, and a collar with a leash if they let him, and he’ll be open to doing the same in return.

Biting and scratching is another one of his kinks, with some minor sadism and masochism. Spanking, bondage, blindfolds… Shaun is eager to explore unconventional means of having sex.

Shaun’s favorite part of the body is thighs. He’ll happily die suffocated by his partner’s thighs. Lying down with his head in his partner’s lap will make him purr. He’ll wear their thighs as earmuffs and bend them back as he pleases, paying extra attention kissing, licking, biting, and raking his fingernails across them.

Then, of course, there’s thigh-high fishnet stockings. Wear a pair of these, especially when accented with a garter belt, and Shaun turns into a puddle of horny goo, especially if they’re worn by his partner/crush, as shown in this steamy picture by Sauce.

To be fair, this is a very spicy sight. Shaun is a man of taste.

Overall, Shaun is a dominant vers, but he’s willing to submit and be a good kitty… eventually. Cats do what they want after all, and it’s going to take a little more than some ear scritches to get this cat daddy to submit to his partner, which is part of the fun.

Speaking of which, Shaun has a daddy kink. If his partner can be a good little kitten and let daddy pet and play with them as he pleases, he’ll be a very happy cat daddy.

While Shaun leans towards monogamy, he’s actually open to joining a poly relationship if the right people came along. He actually considered what it might be like to enter a relationship with both Alice and Ian, but he found that his vibes just didn’t mesh with Ian at all, and not just because Ian’s taste in anime is trash. He just never felt attracted to Ian like he did with Alice, and they never really connected like he did with her.

Shaun got a crush on Alice while they were taking the same class in college. He met her well before he ever knew Ian. They sat next to each other in class and wound up chatting often. They had stuff in common like horror movies, enjoying goth aesthetic, and being silly goobers who joke around with their friends. They’re also the mom/dad friend types taking care of their friend group. She was just so kind and sweet that he couldn’t help but fall hard for her.

It’s a shame that when Shaun finally gathered up the courage to ask Alice out, she casually mentioned that she was meeting with her boyfriend, breaking the poor guy’s heart.

Poor Shaun. Alice had no idea that he was asking her out on a lunch date instead of just going to grab a bite as friends. She missed all the signals he sent her way.

After that, Shaun tried hard not to think about his crush on Alice. He tried to just be there for her as a friend and move on from his romantic feelings, if only for the sake of their friendship. It was just hard when they had so much in common and had such good chemistry… and he couldn’t help but notice some troubling red flags in her relationship with Ian.

It never really seemed to be the right time for Shaun to try to get together with Alice. First it was because she was already in a relationship. Then she had been cheated on and needed a friend rather than someone who would take advantage of her in her most vulnerable moment. She was still in love with Ian even after the breakup, and wasn’t receptive to anyone else romantically for a long time.

Throughout knowing Alice, Shaun has dated other people. He’s had other crushes and tried to get into relationships, some more serious than others, but none have really worked out so far. He has yet to find someone who clicks with him the way that she does. Hopefully one day that might change. He had hoped that when he went off to another college that the distance would allow him to let go of his romantic feelings.

Sadly, a part of Shaun still couldn’t shake the small hope that maybe someday the stars would align and things could work out between them. Coming back to see Alice again just made all the feelings he thought he got over come rushing back… only for his heart to be crushed again when he finds out that once again she has a boyfriend who isn’t him…

Poor Shaun has it rough. I feel so bad for him. This is why I struggle with writing love triangles, hahaha. Still, I’m going with the headcanon that he does find love with someone eventually, someone who he is glad finally came into his life who he just can’t live without. I don’t have a specific character in mind for that role just yet, but I do have a few possibilities that I’m playing around with…

With that said, let’s move on to the fourth and final love interest.

Nick

I’m still indecisive on Nick’s view on love at this point, beyond his crush on the cute cashier at the circus-themed frozen yogurt shop. I’m tempted to have him be a stalker yandere like I talked about in an earlier theory about all the love interests being yandere, but also I’m tempted to go with the angle of him being a sex worker who just wants someone to love him for himself and not simply see him for what he does online.

I’ll probably get a better idea of which direction I want to go with Nick eventually. After all, the audio drama for him on patreon did influence some of my headcanons for him.

Maybe I’ll go with a combination of the two extremes. It would be hilarious that a yandere stalker dom finds himself tongue-tied in front of his crush despite working as an online influencer, rather than it just being a shy mask to get the object of his affection to lower their guard. Hmm…

Regardless of which direction I choose, Nick flirting with Alice at her job didn’t earn him any favors when it came to winning her heart. If anything it made her more on guard around him and lessened his chances of getting closer with her. It’s nothing personal against him, but being hit on while she’s at work makes her feel like she’s trapped, since she can’t leave, and she has no choice but to be polite to customers no matter what happens.

While I don’t have too many love-based headcanons really solidified in my head yet when it comes to Nick, I do see his primary love language as quality time. He’ll make time for those who he cares for, no matter how packed his schedule is, and he appreciates the same from them in return.

Since we’re shy on the romantic headcanons for Nick, let’s just go right to the spice. As we see in his profile, he’s an influencer by day and a dom by night. The audio drama shows him with a very dominating and flirty personality, at least when it comes to his audience. He runs an online streaming show where he talks sweet and dirty to his viewers live on camera. He also takes requests, which vary on the donation tiers. Those requests usually involve dirty talk, exposing himself, using toys on his body, and such. He has quite a lot of subscribers on lonelyfans, and most popular are his private one-on-one shows with a special lucky viewer on rare occasions.

Nick is big into exhibitionism. He shows off his body without shame and enjoys the attention he gets from his audience. He absolutely loves to talk dirty and see how it affects people. He’s good at painting a picture in his audience’s heads with a lewd description, and he gets off on the idea that he’s driving so many of his viewers crazy with lust.

While Nick does want someone to love him as a person, he also wants to be an object of desire for many people. He enjoys his job as a sex worker and the attention he gets online as a sexy dom with his lonelyfans account. Even if he was in a relationship, he would still do his lewd performances before the camera… and maybe he’ll have a special guest star or two on his show if he’s lucky. He would love to convince his romantic partner to join him on camera and dominate them before his large audience, maybe even take the viewers’ requests to decide what he’ll do to his partner next.

Although Nick is looking to join a relationship with just one person, he’s not against the idea of entering a poly relationship, or even participating in an orgy. After all, the more the merrier, right?

Just like on his live shows, Nick is a dominant in bed. He might be shy in casual settings, but he takes control of the scene when with a partner. He’s the one setting the pace, wanting to make his partner beg him and say what exactly they want. He experiments with the kinkier side of BDSM too, such as bondage, candles, and all sorts of toys that can leave a mark on skin and make his partner scream for him.

Nick is very experienced as a dom. He knows how to practice proper BDSM safety and take care of his partner(s) afterward. He can be soft during aftercare, and he knows the benefits of cuddle time. After all, he has a couple fur babies to take care of, and Pico and Cheese make excellent cuddle companions.

I think I’ll finish up Nick’s headcanons with this final spicy tidbit. As we’ve seen in teaser art, Nick has tongue and nipple piercings. I also headcanon that he has a jacob’s ladder piercing. I won’t describe what that is here, but if you know, you know.

I’ve heard that there are people who enjoy the feeling of piercings on sensitive areas, and Nick is one of them.

Conclusion

That’s about all that I can think of at the moment when it comes to my general love/sex headcanons for the main cast. I hope you all enjoyed my thoughts about what turn these five on and what they look for when it comes to relationships.

Though I suspect that when the full release of the game comes out, we’re going to discover that the male leads are probably going to be a lot kinkier than a vanilla aro/ace like me can headcanon up. Just a hunch. ;)

If you are hungry for more smut involving these characters, then you might be interested in checking out Sunshine in Hell or Sunshine in Another World. Those stories are rated as explicit for a reason, and there’s only going to have more scenes of smut to come. I’ve got plenty of rough drafts in the writing tag that I need to finish polishing and post on AO3 after all.

If you like my stories and ideas, please let me know what you think! I absolutely adore all kinds of feedback. It really helps fuel my creativity. Thank you for reading and I hope that you enjoyed reading this huge collection of sugar and spice!

EDIT: Holy crap the timing. I finished this list at the same time as a new incredibly spicy audio drama for Jack dropped on patreon. Join the $5 tier if you want to give it a listen. It’s so, so good and well worth it.

It did disprove that Jack is incapable or cursing or that he would call his sunshine a slut unprompted... but I’m going to stick with that headcanon for the Sunshine in Hell telling of the story anyway. Though eventually he will be able to get pretty spicy with his language the more he loosens up.

The drama also reminded me of a couple things that I left out. I’ve added a few more headcanons to Jack and Alice’s entries since the initial post, and it’s possible I might go back and add even more if more ideas hit me, hahaha. Sorry for any inconvenience.

[l3viat8an]

Can you do one where reader just spoils asmo. Like taking them on dates buying clothes for them. Basically fluff I think it would be really cute if asmo got really sentimental because he's being treated as a person instead of the avatar of lust

Fluff!!! Getting your nails done and some shopping with Asmo!-

Ofc, ofc! There’s more then one way to spoil a demon~! and I’m mixing theses two asks a bit because yea- lots of shopping with Asmo & some teasing! Ignore any typos I’m dyslexic as fuck- sorry

First things, first going to get your nails done at one of Asmo’s favorite little nail salons!

They always treated you and Asmo like royalty (which you basically are in hell lol), getting matching sets of baby pink french tips for Asmo’s birthday!

The demon himself insisted on picking the style and color, something simple and cute!

Laughing and making small talk the whole time with the salon tech as she works and she even joins in on a few of Asmo’s party stories, telling you a few embarrassing tidbits about the demon as he blushes and tries to shush her “Don’t tell MC that!” “But you looked so cute with your head in a punch bowl! You blew up on devilgram if I remember right.” She stops to think for a moment, “Oh! That’s right! Top meme of 1820!! I still see a few of the old ones my nieces and nephews send me.” Asmo groans and would hide his face in his hands if she wasn’t in the middle of painting his nails. You raise one eyebrow and look over at him, “Top meme?” “Don’t!! I’ll show you pictures from that night where I actually look good but forget about that one!” “Alright, alright.” You’ll just have to ask Satan or Mammon about it later-

You and the nail tech giggle at Asmo’s protest and start talking about other stuff, a few of the models currently trending on devilgram, Asmo’s upcoming party and so on. Stuff the demon was more than happy to chat about, mixed with some gossip.

When your nails are done and you move to pay she stops you. “I can’t change you on his birthday. Besides, it’s been ages since I’ve seen him laugh so….” She trails off for a moment looking for the right word “Well, genuinely. You always bring out a special side of Asmodeus. I wish others could see more often.” it’s your turn to protest and you tell her you didn’t do anything special and he’d have a cow if he thought you’d gotten a discount/cheated her out of money and she laughs, “Don’t worry I’ll still give you the recipe. I just won’t take your money.” you try to convince her one more time, but as you start too, you feel arms wrap around your middle and a quick kiss on the cheek “Almost ready sweetie~?” Asmo had caught up and was ready to go-

The tech smiled again, and gave you one last wink. Handing you a fake receipt and telling you to have a good day and continue treating Asmo~!

————————————————————————

Next up taking him clothes shopping! Not that either of you needed new clothes but it’s his birthday and you want to spoil him! “Oh!!” Asmo squealed walking down the racks and racks of clothes and picking out outfit, after outfit. Some for him to try on and some for you~!

After picking out ten or twivlve outfit Asmo dragged you back to the fitting rooms and pushed you into the biggest one, following right behind “Oooh~ cozy.” Asmo giggles turning away and starting to strip and try on his first outfit, “Come on sweetie! No need to be shy it’s just you and me~” he teases seeing you haven’t moved from your corner yet. “That’s exactly what I’m worried about, Asmo.” Your own voice is light and teasing but, he looks at you dead serious for a moment, “I’m not going to try anything. I’m honestly having fun just hanging out with you~” and he turns back to his mirror and start, putting on his first outfit. You just stare at his back for a minute, before shaking your head as if to clear it and starting to try on your own outfit.

You try on all the outfits, a few are only Asmo’s style, sure you look cute but he’s the one who looks gorgeous. and a few are more your style! For every outfit he picked Asmo found a complimentary / matching one for you or him. Snapping a few selfies in the outfits he loved and giving a “Meh” face at the ones he didn’t. It was fun, Asmo had little compliments for all your outfits and everytime you tried to compliment him he’d giggle and give you a little kiss on the kiss or nose. Just small little drops of affection before trying on the next outfit. Eventually you had 3 outfits each and made you way out of the try on room and towards the counter to pay passing several more displays, you stop for a moment and grab two hats. They’re fairly plan looking baseball caps, but both have “Bad bitch” embroidered in pink across the front and the idea of getting Asmo to wear one makes you laugh.

Reaching the checkout counter a few steps behind him, you can’t exactly hide the hats from Asmo, and he raises one eyebrow in question, “Needed a hat?” you shake your head “No, but I wanted something to wear right away and I wanted to match with you.”

Asmo blushes but laughs, asking the cashier to leave the hats out of your bags and even puts yours on for you, then quickly putting on his own. “There! Now everyone will know we match.” and breaking into a fit of giggles.

————————————————————————

After paying for your new outfits and putying on your new hats it’s off to your next stop! But this time Asmo’s leading, half dragging you through the Devildom side streets until you get to some small shop that looks much smaller compared to the others. The little shop sign is crooked and a little faded.

You can’t imagine this being somewhere Asmo would shop. It’s so different then, the big stores like Majolish. “Ahh, Asmo? Is this the right place?” You ask as he reaches for the doorknob “Yes! We’re here just for you~” and he leads you inside.

It’s a quiet little shop with only one salesperson at a little corner absolutely full of cosmetics and empty makeup pallets. “Amaymon! We’re here for MC’s appointment!” Asmo chirps happily, still holding your hand and helping you into a seat at the counter, Amaymon gives you a small smile, looking over your face carefully. Almost as if he’s inspecting you, “Hello, MC. Asmodeus, told me you’ve been interested in makeup.” You nod, it’s true. You had asked Asmo if he could give you some pointers. But you didn’t expect to go to a different demon- “Good. Now don’t worry, I’m not going to give you classes or anything. No, I’ll leave all that to Asmodeus. I’m simply going to match your skin tone and create a makeup pallet with you and a few things Asmodeus told me about you.” “Oh. Is that all?” You ask, still a little confused. but Asmo’s still beaming next to you, so you feel safe. “That is all.” Amaymon says, before going completely quiet.

He grabs a few things here and there moving much faster then, you expected. He grabs small bottles of what look like concealer and foundation, although you don’t ask. Mixing them, occasionally looking over at you before going back to his work.

Asmo watches for awhile before looking around the little shop, he grabs a few new lipsticks off of a different counter and even calls you over to help him pick out some eyeshadow, “We can try all of that’s together when we get home! Now what we really need is a few dark reds or maybe a blueberry-ish shade…” Asmo looks at your face and grabs a few more things, explaining how the colors might look a little bright but he can tone them down or how they’ll bring out your eyes. He just seems so happy, getting to spend time with you and it makes you smile!-

A small cough interrupts your thoughts as, Amaymon has apparently finished. A rather large box is now sitting on the counter with your name written on a little note at the top “Oh, perfect!” Asmo claps his hands and tells Amaymon to add the other stuff you picked out to the total and add it to Asmo’s tap. Amaymon nods as he bags up the other items. “I hope you enjoy your new makeup MC. Don’t let Asmodeus go too overboard on your makeover.” Asmo laughs as he grabs your hand in his and the bags in the other “Amaymon! You know me~ I just can’t help myself.” you laugh and squeeze Asmo’s hand as you both leave the shop and head home.

That night Asmo does your makeup and after much whining and pouting convinces you to do his. It’s not the best, but you’re still learning!! His lipstick is a little smudged and the eyeliner is crooked, but Asmo loves it he takes so many pictures of both you and himself even posting them on devilgram with “Best birthday ever <3” in the caption.

[blueraineshadows]

Brothers Part 11

Garreth Weasley 🔺️ F!MC 🔺️Oscar Weasley

A love rivalry between two brothers. Oscar Weasley is an OC created by @eternalremorse and used with her permission.

Chapter Master List with Ao3 link

Chapter Eleven - Loss

The concept of being alone whilst surrounded by people was a new one for Oscar. It was isolating to feel so disconnected, and yet his friends were all around him, laughing, discussing the tactics they would be practising later on the Quidditch pitch after classes. The Great Hall was abuzz with chatter, and students were making a start on the day. And yet, Oscar sat, his breakfast untouched, his eyes drifting towards the Hufflepuff table. She wasn't there. Her absence was a reminder of what had happened last night.

He tried to smile, to shut off the ache that had formed in his chest that was akin to the cold, hard substance of a Bludger. The loss. Only, this Bludger he couldn't smash away with his bat. This one sat and festered, and he couldn't swallow past it without wanting to scream. Fists clenched he got up from the table, ignoring the looks from his teammates as he stalked from the Great Hall. Why bother trying to speak when he had nothing to say?

He had lost her. MC had walked away from him, and he just wanted her to come back.

....*....

On first entering the Great Hall that morning, Garreth's eyes had immediately landed on the Hufflepuff table only to face the realisation that MC was not there. Again. Did the girl never eat anymore? Sighing with his disappointment, he made his way to the Gryffindor table and took a seat next to Leander, dropping his journal down and grabbing several slices of toast.

"Morning, Lee," he greeted, stifling a yawn. "What are you up to today?"

Leander paused in spooning his porridge and smiled at Garreth. "Beasts, History of Magic and Quidditch practice. You? Party planning? I heard you were cooking up some brews."

Garreth smirked. "I'm meeting Seb later to work on them, actually."

Leander scowled. "You've got rather friendly with Sallow lately. What's that all about?"

"He's not that bad once you get to know him. He's been... helping me out. Plus, it means I get to spend more time with MC when I'm with him."

Leander huffed and glanced over his shoulder towards the Slytherin table where Sebastian and Poppy were huddled together, giggling and eating breakfast whilst trying to keep their hands respectable.

"He's got his paws all over Sweeting again," he huffed. "I'm surprised he has the time to hang around with you, or MC. Speaking of which, what's going on with MC lately? There's definitely something up with her and Oscar. She turned up at the common room last night looking a bit peaky. She asked for Oscar, and I don't think it went well, judging by the look on his face this morning."

Garreth frowned and looked up the table, Leander following his gaze as they took in Oscar's grim expression, his breakfast untouched. Leander was right. Oscar did not look happy. He gave Leander a curious glance. His fellow Gryffindor was usually up on the gossip. He didn't know how he did it, but Leander just seemed to discover and remember all sorts of tidbits about their peers.

"Did they fight?" Garreth asked, his stomach sinking as his thoughts flicked towards Trixie. Had she said something? Is that why MC was avoiding everyone?

Leander shrugged. "No idea, mate. Your brother isn't talking to anyone, but I wouldn't be surprised. I mean, look at him."

Garreth did look and felt a guilty sinking feeling in his stomach. He toyed with his slice of toast as he thought of all the times he had imagined Oscar not being with MC, and now that there were signs of trouble, he realised how awful that was. He didn't want his brother to be unhappy.

Oscar looked tired, pale, and very glum as he stood and left the table. Isaac called after him, but Oscar ignored his friend. Isaac and Felix, another Quidditch team member, exchanged a puzzled look, but nobody went after Oscar to see if he was alright.

Garreth dropped his toast onto his plate, lamenting the empty stomach he was going to have as he climbed from the bench. He grabbed up his journal and glanced towards Leander.

"I will catch up with you later, Lee," he said and plucked an apple from the bowl on the table. "Enjoy your breakfast."

He chased after Oscar, dodging other students whilst trying to keep his eyes on his brother's copper locks. He followed him out into the bright sunlight, the sky clear, and the air crisp as they crossed the courtyard.

"Oscar, wait!"

His brother paused and turned, a frown on his face before his shoulders slumped. Garreth slowed his steps, a little wary. Oscar was generally an easygoing boy, but there was a temper that simmered quietly beneath that charming exterior. He'd been on the receiving end of it more than a few times growing up. His ability to wind his siblings up had often landed him with a thump or a dunking in the rain barrel.

But Oscar was family. And family always stuck together, no matter what. They always made up in the end.

Garreth wondered if he was reminding himself of this because of a guilty conscience. If Trixie really had whispered her suspicions, then Oscar was going to be pissed at him. While he hadn't actually done anything wrong, his private fantasies that played out in his head were shamefully guilty.

"Are you alright, Oscar? You don't look too happy. Anything I can help you with?"

His questions were tentative, his fingers clutching at his journal as he eyed his brother. Oscar lifted an eyebrow, his mouth twisting bitterly. "You mean to say you haven't heard?"

Garreth frowned. "Heard what?"

Oscar gave him a closer look before looking away, his eyes betraying a glimmer of hurt.

"MC and I broke up."

Garreth's lips parted in surprise at those words, the flat, emotionless tone with which they were spoken worrying him more than anything. Oscar's face was tight, his body rigid. He was closing himself off, and Garreth reached for his arm, squeezing it gently.

"I'm sorry, Oscar. I didn't know," he said, his mouth twisting sadly.

Oscar's eyes narrowed a little. "You surprise me. Aren't you two close? You spend a lot of time with her Slytherin bodyguard, too. I bet he knows."

Garreth tugged at his robe sleeve awkwardly, not really liking the bitter tone to Oscar's voice. It didn't ease the worry that Trixie had been whispering in his ear. Also, Oscar was the second person to make a dig about his friendship with Sebastian this morning, and it was getting rather annoying.

"I haven't really spoken to MC much lately," he said, frowning. "She doesn't tell me everything, either. What happened?"

Oscar sighed and held out his hands as if he didn't really know. "She wanted out," he said vaguely.

Garreth hated the flicker of hope that sparked in his chest. MC had left Oscar. Was it so wrong and foolish to wonder if what happened in Hogsmeade was the reason? He had to shove the shameful hope down. His brother was clearly hurting. Now was not the time.

"I'm so sorry," he said. He grabbed Oscar, pulling him in for a quick hug, patting him awkwardly on the back with one hand, his journal in the other. "Let me know if there is anything I can do. Even if it's just to take your mind off things. I'm going off out foraging later if you fancy it. It would get you away from the castle for a bit."

Oscar pulled back away from him and pushed a hand through his hair, shaking his head.

"Thanks, Garreth, but I will pass. I've got Quidditch practise later, and to be honest, I am not good company right now."

"Okay," Garreth said, nodding, shifting awkwardly. He considered making a joke, coming up with something funny to try and lighten the mood. He wasn't so good with these situations, and he was never quite sure what to say. However, he thought perhaps a joke would earn him one of Oscar's bruising thumps, and so he kept his mouth shut.

Oscar managed a tight smile and patted him on the shoulder. "I appreciate the offer, though, brother. I will be alright. I just need some time. I really liked her, you know?"

Oh, he knew. Garreth completely understood. He had thought that liking MC from afar and seeing her with someone else was hard sometimes. He could only imagine how it would feel to have her and then lose her.

Oscar's gaze lingered on Garreth’s journal for a moment, his face shadowed and strained. He met Garreth’s eyes, the pain all too evident.

"I'll see you later, Garreth."

As he watched his brother walk away, his robe billowing in the cold breeze, Garreth couldn't help but feel as though he had done something wrong. It settled in his stomach, twisting around with his hunger, and it made a deep rumbling sound. He patted the apple in his pocket but couldn't seem to find the enthusiasm to eat it.

He wondered how MC was doing. Was she as sad as Oscar? If only she didn't hide away. A longing to see her tugged deeply at him. Even through his concern for Oscar, he still ached for her, that tiny flicker of hope hanging on strong.

Realising that his first class of the day was potions, his face brightened, and he hurried back into the castle.

....*....

Waking up and seeing Poppy’s bed still empty seemed to put emphasis on her loneliness as MC crawled out of bed. Her eyes were tight from tears and lack of sleep, her chest heavy. She was already doubting herself and her decision. Maybe she had rushed into it, her panic making her react.

People always left her in some way. Either being left in a children's home, making new friends only for them to move on to new places, or death. She'd had to learn how to be alone. And now that she had people to care about, it felt odd to push one away. Oscar had claimed to care deeply for her. Had she just made a silly mistake? Was she pushing him away to avoid the chance he would do it to her?

But, it was also wrong to be intimately close to someone whilst thinking of another. She could not get past it, no matter how hard she tried. The silly mistake had been allowing herself to fall for the charms of a handsome boy when there had been someone else there all along.

She took out the wooden box that held her letters, going over the ones she had received from Garreth over the summer. His words were not romantic. He had not sought to court her, but they were filled with so much warmth. It made her think of his arms when he had held her, his comfort through her moments of panic and distress. Without judgement or feeling like she was imposing, Garreth was there. He never asked for anything in return.

This was alongside his words spoken during a dance. Those words had been flirty and almost romantic. She could not forget those or the way he had looked at her.

At the bottom of one letter was a small ink drawing of a hummingbird dipping into a flower. He must have drawn it himself, and she smiled as she brushed a finger tip over the beautifully sketched lines. Such beautiful simplicity revealed so much about the boy.

She had made the right decision. As she tucked the letters safely away, her only regret was that even if she did feel something for Garreth, she could neither pursue or allow it. He was Oscar's brother. It wouldn't be right. It filled her with sadness, but she had to do the right thing. She carried enough guilt in her heart.

As she dressed and pondered the idea of breakfast, she realised that coming face to face with Oscar was something she would rather avoid. She had made the right decision, but seeing him would lean on her self-doubt. His eyes were too dangerous, his proximity overwhelming, and she needed to distance herself from that.

There was always fruit in a bowl in the common room, and she settled on an apple and a pear for breakfast before leaving the castle. A walk around the lake to clear her head was in order.

When it was time for class, she made her way back to the castle for potions. She would see Garreth, and she wondered if he knew about her and Oscar already. It was likely.

Outside the castle doors, she came across Sebastian and Poppy, stealing a kiss before heading to class. MC lowered her head, intending to pass them by, but Poppy called out to her. Her cheeks were flushed pink, her eyes dancing with happiness. It felt like a punch to the stomach, and MC couldn't look. She merely lifted a hand in a hurried wave and made a dash for the huge castle doors.

How awful to be jealous of her friend's joy, but there it was.

Avoiding Poppy was one thing. Avoiding Sebastian was another. As MC was about to walk into the potions classroom, a hand grabbed her arm, and Sebastian was leading her into the nearby stair well. With her back to the wall and his frame leaning over her, she looked up into curious brown eyes, his finger under her chin.

"What's happened?"

There was no getting anything past him. He had that stubborn look on his face. He wouldn't let it go until he had it out of her, and he was bound to find out soon enough anyway. She sighed, her shoulders slumping.

"Oscar and I have parted ways."

It was the first time she had said it. The words spoken out loud put a final seal on it, and her lips trembled. She tried to look away, but Sebastian held her firm, his eyes darkening at the shine of tears she fought back.

"What did he do?"

"Nothing!" She said immediately, taking hold of his hand and removing it from her chin. "Oscar didn't do anything. It... it was me. I ended it."

Sebastian had this way of looking at you, so penetrative and inquisitive. It locked you into his eyes, and it was very hard to look away. Ever since she had begun to know him, she had been caught under that spell, always unable to do anything but answer to his call.

Once, she had thought it love, and in a way, it was. They were bonded by terrible events and dark secrets, but also by affection and understanding. Nobody knew her like he did, and she suspected it worked both ways. She would do anything for him, and she had done some dubious things already to protect him. He would do it for her, though. She knew that and trusted him with her life.

Sebastian was her family now, a friend who was like a brother through choice rather than blood. She wasn't his lost sister, Anne. Nobody could replace his twin. But they were both orphans and alone in the world. She was glad to have found him.

The way he was looking at her right now was merely his own way of ensuring that nothing bad had happened. He was not a fan of Oscar, had tolerated her relationship with him because he thought it made her happy. Clearly, this was not the case, and Sebastian was in full protective mode.

"Oscar has done nothing untoward, Seb. I'm alright," she assured him. She caught hold of his hand and squeezed. "I just... it didn't feel right, and I thought it best to step away before I got in too deep."

"I can see that you are troubled, and I hate to see it, but as long as you are not hurt. That I can not abide, you know that."

Her gaze softened. "I know that. I am not hurt, just sad."

Sebastian considered her words and then nodded. He slipped his arms around her, holding her tight against his chest. His familiar scent really did feel like home, and she gripped the back of his robes, welcoming the push back on the lonely shadow that seemed to hang over her.

"You've done the right thing. Oscar wasn't right for you," Sebastian said, stepping back and patting her shoulder.

She almost smiled at the smug gleam in his eyes. He just loved being right. He took her arm and led her back out into the corridor and towards the potions classroom.

"Maybe now you can stop hiding away from the world and let us see that lovely smile of yours," he said, flashing a smile of his own. "We have party plans to take care of, and only a few days left to do it. Your other love deserves to celebrate coming of age in style."

"Sebastian... " She gave him a warning look. His comment about Garreth being her love a little too close for comfort after pondering over his letters this morning.

Sebastian merely smirked and escorted her through the classroom until they arrived at her workstation, complete with a smiling Garreth.

"Look who I found, Weasley. She hasn't forgotten us after all," Sebastian said, putting his arm around her shoulders for a squeeze. He winked at MC, and her lips twitched. He was too charming for his own good sometimes. He guided her towards the seat next to Garreth with a flourish. "She's all yours now, mate. Take good care of her. She deserves to smile."

MC gaped at Sebastian, her cheeks flushing as he backed up away from the workstation, his smirk unbelievably roguish. She'd hex him later for his audacity, knowing full well it was likely an empty promise, but it felt good to just imagine it for a moment. He knew exactly what he was doing and dared her to say something back with those impish eyes of his.

She turned to Garreth with an awkward glance, taking out her quill and notebook. She couldn't scold Sebastian here in front of Garreth. That could lead to other dangerous topics of discussion, such as the suggestion that she was all Garreth's now.

"Hi," she said, her cheeks far too hot and her awareness of him on full alert.

Garreth's smile lit the green of his eyes, and she felt the warmth of it. There it was. That unrelenting, soft warmth that only he had. Much like the sun, he chased lonely shadows back and surrounded you with light. How did one stay away from that?

"Hello, MC. It's good to see you. Let's see if I can do something about that smile of yours."

As they worked through the lesson, her shadows did indeed lift. They didn't completely disappear. They lingered over her shoulder, but it was easier to bear them with every funny quip, every clumsy mishap. Oscar was mentioned only once, Garreth's sympathetic smile and assurances of support were delivered, and then he moved on, turning the flow of conversation back towards much lighter subjects. It wasn't long before a smile was curving her lips, her gaze lingering maybe a little too long on green eyes and freckled hands.

As they packed up their belongings and prepared to leave class, MC caught Garreth on the arm, pausing his step. He met her eyes with a curious look, and her face softened.

Thank you," she said. "For cheering me up."

"I do my best," he said with a grin.

Sebastian sidled up between them, throwing an arm around each of them as they headed for the door, his smirk firmly in place.

"So then, what's the plan? We have party brews to make. Are you in, MC? We could use some help."

She looked at both boys, their effortless ways of making her feel like she belonged, almost bringing a tear to her eyes. "I'm in," she said. "What do you want me to do?"

"Well, we need ingredients," Garreth said. "I'm heading out after classes today to gather some."

"Excellent," Sebastian said, tightening his hold on them both and drawing them closer so they were a squished little trio walking along. "Why don't you go with him, MC? Meanwhile, I'm heading into Hogsmeade to have a chat with Sirona. I'm going to reserve the whole upper floor of the Three Broomsticks for the party."

MC met Garreth's eyes across Sebastian. Going with him would mean time spent alone. She should probably say no. It was placing temptation in her path, and so soon after Oscar. But, her head was nodding under the press of Sebastian's tight embrace. "Sure, I'll come along."

Garreth's eyes lit up, and Sebastian chuckled, his own gaze sparking with mischief as he glanced between them. He pressed a kiss to MC's forehead and then turned to do the same to Garreth. Garreth grimaced and tried to fight him off, a giggle bubbling up and out of MC's mouth as they stumbled in the hallway.

Sebastian let them both go with a laugh. He began to head off, turning to point at them both.

"Happy foraging you two, and don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"Well, that narrows it down," MC said, rolling her eyes and desperately trying not to blush.

When she looked at Garreth, his cheeks were equally as pink.

"Looks like I will be seeing you later, then," he smiled. "Shall I come to fetch you from your common room when I'm ready?"

She nodded, clutching her bag a little tighter. "I'll see you then."

....*....

The chilly bite in the air meant nothing to Oscar as he swung his Beater bat and cracked it against a Bludger, sending it hurtling across the pitch towards Elijah. His teammate swooped and aimed, smashing the hard ball back towards Oscar. It was good practise to spar against each other, and today, it felt good to release the pent-up emotion that was festering inside him.

He grit his teeth and kept his eye on the Bludger, swinging back and hitting it with all his strength, an angry sound leaving his throat.

All day, through classes and navigating the castle, his eyes had been on alert for just one glimpse of MC. Anything, even if it was just from a distance. He had not spoken one word about it to anyone other than Garreth this morning.

Garreth. Soft, cheeky Garreth, with his romantic drawings, his eyes filled with longing whenever he looked at MC.

Oscar gritted his teeth harder, his head filling with every time he had seen his brother with MC. Garreth wanted her. He had always wanted her. Oscar had always known it, deep down. He recalled the first day of term, arriving in Hogsmeade, the way his brother had stood and watched her board the carriage with Sallow.

Had he deliberately gone after MC because he knew he could? He'd always been competitive, always had to be the best at everything. Had he charmed MC into his arms just so Garreth couldn't?

Maybe. Maybe not. Garreth could have charmed her, too. Maybe he would have won. Oscar had caught her attention, and then he had fallen in deeper than he had expected. MC was beautiful, soft, and so very innocent, but under that was a strength that she kept hidden. She intrigued him, and he had desperately wanted to delve deeper and discover what she so carefully guarded.

Now, he would likely never know. She had slipped from his grasp, and he hated it. Was there a way to try and get her back? How could he reassure her that he had eyes only for her?

The pain of it seemed to hollow out his chest, and he took it out on the Bludgers, working up a sweat that dripped from his forehead, his muscles screaming in protest.

"Easy there, mate. What's got into you?" Isaac said, coming up beside him. "You're running Elijah ragged there."

"Good, we need to be the best," Oscar said. He wiped his forehead and adjusted his grip on his bat. "No pain, no gain. Isn't that what the muggles say?"

Isaac made a stopping motion towards Elijah and used his wand to still the bludger. His piercing blue eyes took in Oscar, and he put a hand on his shoulder.

"What's going on, Os? You're not yourself. Is this about your little Hufflepuff still?"

Oscar's face tightened, and he shrugged off his friend's hand. "Stop calling her that. She isn't mine anymore."

Isaac held both hands up, eyes wary. "Okay, mate. I apologise. And I'm sorry to hear that."

"Are you?" Oscar grimaced. He tossed his bat to the ground and began to stride towards the changing rooms, Issac at his heels. "Last we spoke, you told me to get rid. Well, she saved me a job and ended it for me. I thought you'd be pleased."

"Why would I be pleased? Os... I don't want you to be unhappy," Isaac said. He made a grab for Oscar's arm, face filled with concern as they paused. "Hey, take it easy, mate. I really am sorry."

Oscar glared up at his friend, his anger and pain caught in a swirling ball in his chest, the words just not forming. He knew Isaac meant no harm. He knew it, but his head was clouded. He pulled his arm free and stalked away, shoulders set tight as he headed for the changing rooms. He was done with practise for today.

As he rounded the corner, he hesitated. A small group of girls were gathered near the door, charming little birds to fly around, their soft laughter filling the space. As they looked up towards him, he spotted the sultry gaze of Trixie, and he looked down. Normally, he would flirt, or at least wave, and smile, but he found he couldn't even look at her or any of the other regular girls who hung around the pitch.

Ignoring the girls, he entered the changing room. His habitual charm around the ladies had been a reason MC had pulled away from him. Was he really that untrustworthy? He'd never really looked at it that way before. All the girls that had come before MC hadn't been anything more than a bit of fun. A quick fumble under the stands, steamy kisses in broom cupboards, and late nights twisted in bed sheets.

Feelings had never really come into it, at least not for him, and he just moved on to the next chase. At least, that's what he had done until he met MC.

The feeling of being set aside was a new one, and he turned it over in his mind, considering for the first time that maybe he had made girls feel this way. It was a sobering thought as he pulled off his training gear and headed for the showers. Maybe he was an arsehole after all, not even stopping to consider that his actions might be hurting people. How many girls had he hurt and not even realised? It made him glum to think of it, hating the thought.

He stood under the hot water a while, letting it run over him in the hopes it might wash some of the tension away, but as he shut the water off and grabbed his towel, he realised it was going to take more than a cleansing to move on from this.

He dried off and wrapped the towel about his waist, walking with his head bowed towards the lockers. His thoughts were miles away, and so he was upon her before he even realised Trixie was there. He paused and stared at her sitting on the bench, her hands gripping the edge as she smiled up at him, her eyes soft for once.

She was truly a beautiful girl, her raven hair sleek and soft, her skin flawless and smooth. She knew she was attractive and used it to her advantage, but too often, the sly look in her eyes detracted from her natural beauty. There was a coldness to Trixie that had always made him keep her at arms length. They had shared some rather steamy encounters, but again, he had never looked for anything deeper.

She was always there, though, lingering. He looked into her eyes, the colour a light grey at the moment. She had the strange gift of her eye colour shifting depending on her mood. It had always fascinated him, especially when he had watched them darken with desire.

"Hello," she said. She tilted her head as she considered him, her eyes wandering over his bare chest, lips twitching up into a smirk as she stood. "Did you enjoy your shower? You were in there long enough. I almost came to find you."

"What are you doing here, Trix?" He sighed and moved past her, opening his locker and pulling out his school clothes.

"You don't look yourself, Oscar. I came to see if you're alright."

He stilled, hands on his clothes, his gaze facing into his locker. Suspicion crept over him. Since when did she do the sweet, caring act? He turned to look at her, but there was no calculating gleam in her eyes, just curiosity perhaps.

"I'm fine," he said, dropping his clothes onto the bench beside her. "What do you really want?"

She frowned. "I mean it. I can tell something is upsetting you."

"And you care because...?" He gave her a wry look as he shrugged on his shirt and began to fasten his buttons.

Her chin lifted slightly and she folded her arms. "It's her, isn't it? The little hero. What did she do?"

Oscar shook his head, his jaw tightening. "I'm not in the mood for one of your little games, Trixie. Go on, get yourself out of here so I can get dressed in peace."

"I was right about her, wasn't I? She isn't right for you. She brushed you off and denied you, didn't she? Uptight, little virgin who thinks she is so fucking perfect..."

He saw red. Ever since last night, the pressure had been building, and it finally snapped. He reached out and grabbed Trixie, his hand circling her throat as he slammed her against the lockers with a thud. Trixie didn't even yelp. She merely widened her eyes, her throat working hard against his tight grip. She didn't even attempt to fight him off. She had nerves of bloody iron.

Oscar glared at her, holding her in place, rage seething through him. His fingers didn't squeeze, but it felt strangely powerful and heady to hold her by the throat like this. He shoved the thought aside, not ready to glimpse into that box of ideas and study the implications.

"Shut your mouth," he said coldly. "You don't know anything about what happened between myself and MC, and I won't hear you speak about her that way."

Trixie gripped her hand about his wrist, gulping a little as she adjusted her head, but he didn't let go. Her eyes darkened to almost black, and she smirked.

"My, my. You've got feelings for her, haven't you? Real feelings."

He let her go as if she burned him, turning his back on those probing eyes. "Get out, Trixie."

"You love her," she said, a soft, surprised laugh leaving her lips. "That is a shame, isn't it? Oscar Weasley finally falls for a girl, and she is in love with someone else."

Oscar froze, his back stiffening as he turned his head a little. He could see Trixie in his periphery, stalking like a sleek, black cat. "What?"

"Dont tell me you haven't noticed," she purred. She leaned closer, the soft scent of herbs and incense emanating from her. "Your little hero loves your brother, does she not? They have such chemistry, and as for the way they look at each other... well."

Oscar turned to face her, his own suspicions coming back to him, sliding thickly through his gut with his envy. "What are you talking about?"

Trixie's eyes shifted into a greyish, blue colour, a sad pout on her lips as she touched gentle fingers to his face.

"I'm almost sorry I was right about her, Oscar. She wasn't the best choice for you. She will never be able to give you what you want, especially when she wants Garreth. I always wondered why he kept turning me down. That never happens. It was because of her. I'd bet my last Galleon on it."

Trixie let her hand drop, and she backed up away from him, her eyes still on him, mouth in a little pout. He swallowed, fought against his anger and the pain that twisted sharply in his chest. It would be easy to take that ache out on her, push it until they argued... or fucked.

He shook his head. No. He was done with all that. He needed to change, to try and be better.

"You don't look surprised, sweetheart. You knew all along, didn't you?"

His jaw tightened and he glared at her. "Get out, Trixie. We're done here."

Her lips twisted up into a knowing smile as she backed up further. "Don't be sad for too long, Oscar. She won't be. Trust me."

Oscar gripped his trousers until his knuckles turned white, watching as Trixie strolled out of the changing room without a glance back.

Was she right? Would MC be already moving on? Was he here wallowing in his sadness and pain while she was already thinking of the next path? Just like he had done with all the other girls before her. He sat down on the bench and held his face in his hands. Was this some kind of strange karma?

What would he do if MC and Garreth finally ended up in each other's arms? He'd had his suspicions, and now Trixie had voiced them, perhaps others had noticed too. How had she come to that realisation? What had she seen? He wasn't sure he wanted to know. He was already tormented by the drawings in Garreth's journal that he wasn't supposed to know about. Garreth definitely had feelings for her, and if MC returned them, would he be able to stand it.

His own brother. He felt the sting of tears, and he let them fall.

....*....

The cold seeped through Garreth's layers of clothing and the gloom of the Forbidden Forest felt heavier than usual this afternoon as they made their way along the trail. MC walked just ahead of him, her long hair loose about her shoulders, and a woolly hat pulled low on her head. Like him, she wore a winter coat, the hem reaching the tops of her long boots. Her scarf was of a lovely deep blue, very different from the Gryffindor scarf she had worn for Oscar.

The colour suited her, it complimented her colouring, and he told himself his appreciation of it had nothing to do with the fact that it wasn't Oscar's.

They were making their way under the canopy of trees in companionable silence, their bags already rather full of various potion supplies gathered. The conversation had mainly stuck to the tasks at hand so far, or schoolwork, and Garreth had tried to tempt another smile out of her like he had in potions this morning, but the strained look remained around her eyes. She seemed guarded, on edge, and he watched her carefully.

They came to a clearing and paused. Around the space were discarded items that seemed to show signs of a poacher camp. Garreth’s hand twitched near his wand, his eyes scanning warily as he remembered the last time they had come across enemies under the trees. His duelling practise with Sebastian added a new layer of confidence as he joined MC near a pile of empty cages.

"Whatever they had captured is long gone now," she said, leaning forward to test a cage door to find it unlocked. She glanced around. "I wonder what made them abandon the camp like this."

"Spiders? Maybe even a troll, although there isn't really any damage," he said, moving towards some empty barrels.

"Hmm, it could have been Aurors, I suppose," she said thoughtfully. "One can only hope."

He eyed her a moment, noting the cool determination on her face as she spoke. "Is that something you have thought of doing yourself? I mean, you are more than capable, I'm sure."

With those terrifying abilities of hers, he could imagine her making a rather successful Auror. Although, the thought of her out in the world fighting against the world's darkest wizardkind made him shiver.

"Me? An Auror?" She scoffed. She shook her head. "No, definitely not. I've had my fill of fighting dark wizards, enough to last a lifetime."

"Does that mean you have put some thought into what happens once you leave Hogwarts after all?"

As he came to stand before her, she looked up at him, her lovely eyes looking large and lost in her pale face. When they had spoken of this before, she hadn't been sure what she had wanted.

She fixed him with a long look, sadness clouding her eyes briefly before she shrugged.

"I know I don't want to be held up as some kind of hero or have my life on display for all to see."

"Is this because of the photo in the Prophet?"

That particular image of Oscar kissing her had been passed around and giggled over, lads slapping Oscar on the back as if he had done something marvellous in snogging the Hero of Hogwarts. He knew the image had bothered her, her snap comments about it, and Sebastian's word of warning not to bring it up, eluding as to why she was avoiding people.

MC nodded and sighed. "That article dragged out every awful memory of fifth year, and Oscar just didn't seem to understand..."

She trailed off, her eyes skipping away as she lowered her head.

"It's okay. You can talk about him, MC. It might even help. I know he is my brother, but I am also your friend. I don't want you to feel like you can't talk to me."

Her eyes were heavy and shining with unshed tears when she looked up at him. He stepped forward, his arms ready to hold her, but then she spoke.

"I don't want to come between you, Garreth. That's not fair. He is your brother."

He paused and let his hands drop to his sides. Now, that was a loaded statement. He felt his stomach sink, knowing that it made sense, but at the same time wishing that things could be different. Did she just mean about the talking? Or did she mean the as yet unspoken thing, whatever it was, between them?

That day in Hogsmeade had to have meant something, surely. Or was he just reading too much into it, filled with too much hope, perhaps?

"You won't come between us, MC. He's a pain in the bum sometimes, but he is my big brother. We always figure things out," he said. He risked another step forward. "He knows we are friends. He can't begrudge us that. And anyway, I'm not going to stop being here for you just because he was fool enough to lose you."

"Garreth, he isn't a fool," she said, shaking her head. "We just wouldn't have worked. Oscar has his future mapped out already, and that's great. It's just not for me."

"What is for you?"

"I... I don't know. A proper home, I guess. I've never really had one," she said. She looked so lost and uncertain, eyes looking everywhere but at him. She wrapped her arms about herself, a flash of vulnerability crossing her face. "The whole thing is so daunting to think about. I'm not sure I know what I want yet, if I am really honest."

He offered her a small smile. "Well, a home is a good place to start. You still have time to figure out all the rest."

She nodded, and he ached to hold her, but he worried that she would push him back if he tried. He clenched his hands into fists to stop himself and turned to look around the clearing again, moving away from her to look over some broken crates, sacks that were soaking wet and beginning to mould. He kicked at a stone, and it bounced across the clearing, rolling to a stop near a clump of bushes. As his eyes followed it, he noticed a shifting shadow through the leaves, and he stilled, squinting through the darkness in an effort to see better.

The shadow shifted again, and he reached into his pocket, fingers curling around his wand, his heart picking up. Was it a poacher? Or perhaps one of the huge spiders that loitered under these dark trees.

"What is it?" MC asked, moving up behind him, her voice low.

He held up his hand to quieten her, his eyes still trained on the bushes. A shape appeared, forming out of the gloom and low, swirling mist. It didn't seem to be the shape of a person, taller and almost wraith like, the beast stepped out from behind the foliage and into the clearing. It appeared to be sniffing around where the stone Garreth had kicked rolled to a stop.

Garreth sucked in a harsh breath, his eyes widening in shock as he took in the horse-like shape. Its skin was black and leathery looking, and it clung tightly to the skeletal bones of its frame. His mouth hung open at the sight.

"Bloody hell..." His voice was a strained whisper as he stared.

MC shifted behind him. He could feel her presence as a warm beacon in the chill air, goosebumps pricking his skin.

"Oh, it's a Thestral," she said, touching a hand to his arm to gently lower it. His eyes flicked down to realise he had been aiming his wand at the beast, his palm sweating around the wood. "It's okay. They won't hurt you. They're actually quite gentle beasts, despite their reputation."

"I... I've never... " He shook his head, still awestruck by what he was seeing. "I've only ever seen drawings of them."

MC frowned up at him. "Really? You've never seen the ones at school?"

He met her eyes and shook his head. They had Thestrals at Hogwarts? He'd never seen one! But then he'd never seen death before, so why would he? He froze.

"I hadn't seen death..."

They stared at each other, wide-eyed. Realisation dawned on her face, and she brought her gloved hands to her lips. "Oh, Garreth. I'm so sorry. It's because of me. That's how you can see them now, because of what I did!"

He saw the horrible realisation in her eyes, eyes that began to well up again, and he immediately took hold of her arms.

"Don't you dare, MC. Don't be upset about this," he said firmly.

"But, it's my fault. I forced you to witness death, and in the most awful way," she said, a tear escaping to slide down her cheek. She swiped at it, her face scrunching up in frustration. "And people call me a hero. I'm not. I'm a killer, I've hurt people, I've done things..."

She clamped her hand over her mouth and tried to turn away, but he wouldn't let her. He held her firmly. He felt the cool slide of fear slither down his spine as he wondered how that sentence would have ended. What things had she done? He tried not to think about it. He couldn't imagine thinking of her in any other way than the soft and generous girl she was. He'd seen her power, witnessed death at her hands, but he got past that. He still looked at her like she was the only girl in the world who could make his heart thump with fire.

"Look at me," he said, gripping her arms. "Okay, so you've done some bad things, but you've also done lots of good things. You help so many people with little favours. You support Poppy through all the trouble with her parents, and no matter what really happened under Hogwarts that night, you did stop Ranrok. You did save people, and nobody can take that away from you."

She looked up at him, tears escaping faster now, her lips trembling. His heart ached, knowing she carried so much dark within her, and struggled with it, but she was also so full of light. If only she could see what he could see.

"You saved me too, you know. That day in the forest. If you hadn't brought down those poachers, I could be dead right now. Dead and gone, and not able to see a real-life Thestral in the flesh. Don't be sorry, MC. I mean, look at them! As sad as the reason is for seeing them, look how amazing they are!"

They both turned to look at the Thestral as it wandered a little further into the clearing. Garreth really was in awe of it, his eyes absorbing every little detail and storing it away so that he could sketch it out later in his journal. He had spoken the truth. They were magnificent looking creatures, so unique and special. Much like the girl beside him right now. He looked back at her with a smile.

"I don't deserve you, Garreth Weasley," she said softly.

"Don't be daft," he said, pulling her against his chest. He cupped her head and held her there, his fingers stroking against her woolly hat. "I mean, sure, I'm a bloody delight, but you, my dear. You are something else. It will take a whole lot more than a Thestral to put me off, believe me."

She was tense to start with, stiffening up as he held her against him, but he refused to let go. He had the feeling she needed to be held more than she would ever admit, and besides, she was lovely and warm, and it was freezing out here.

Gradually, though, she began to relax. His hand stroked her head, and his other hand caressed her back, rubbing up and down in long strokes against the rough wool of her coat. He wanted her to feel safe. He wanted to be the one to give her that.

She snuggled in closer as they watched the Thestral, and he thought that it was maybe one of his favourite moments with her.

Until that point, anyway.

To be continued...

Below is a bonus image of Trixie McNair, my own Slytherin OC, and a regular bad girl. Her image was created by Midjourney AI.

[alj4890]

I got this from this incorrect quote generator. I need you to do something with this! lol

😂 I'm still dying with all those you shared. I'm adding that other you sent me with this one

I'm setting this at the time these two were keeping their relationship a secret from everyone except his two closest friends. And I have no idea how this ended up the way it did. Nothing at all like I had planned 😂

Masterlist

Admittance

(Tobias Carrick x F!MC) in a Choices Open Heart One Shot

It felt like a never ending work week. Chris couldn't remember the last time she slept for longer than a couple of hours at a stretch. With the mad rush of flu patients coming in and out of the E.R., she'd begun to daydream of spending her entire time off in her bedroom, curtains closed, and having the best sleep of her life.

She collapsed upon her soft bed after a particularly grueling shift, only moving when she heard the ringtone she'd chosen for her favorite doctor.

"Lo?" She managed to get out.

"I don't even rate a full hello?" Tobias teased.

"You're lucky to get that." She mumbled. "I think I barely acknowledged Jackie when I walked past her earlier."

She didn't have the energy to muffle her yawn.

"I don't think I've ever been this tired."

"I take it our date tonight is off?" He asked, already disappointed at the fact he wouldn't get to see her.

Chris sat up with a groan. "It can't already be Thursday!"

"It is.

"Damnit." She slumped back against her headboard. "I was looking forward to tonight."

"I was too." Tobias sighed. "Want me to sneak over and at least bring you dinner?"

Chris perked up at that offer. "You don't have to sneak. Aurora is already in bed and the others are working the night shift."

"Then I'll see you soon." He promised.

Chris looked down at her tank top and pajama bottoms. The thought of taking them off seemed too horrible to contemplate.

"Do you mind if I don't dress up? I just got out of the shower and put on some pajamas. I think it might kill me to change clothes."

"You know I don't care." He reminded her.

Her smile grew bigger when she heard the flirty lilt to his deep voice.

"You know, I don't think I've ever seen you in pajamas before. I think it's about time I got a peek at your bedroom too."

"I suppose it is only fair." Chris teased. "After all, you are a very gracious host whenever I want to see your bedroom."

"I aim to please." He responded. "And you know if you feel the need to relax without those pj's, I certainly won't complain."

She burst out laughing. "Nice try, Dr. Carrick. Right now, you'll be lucky if I have enough energy to answer the door when you knock."

"Take a nap." Tobias ordered. "I'll call when I'm at the door."

***************

A little over an hour later, Chris roused herself from her bed and padded down the hallway.

"Hey." Tobias whispered, once she opened the door.

She smiled sleepily into his kiss and leaned a little more against him when he wrapped his arms around her.

"You know, you could have told me to wait until tomorrow to see you." He reminded her.

"But I didn't want to wait." She snuggled within his arms. "This is what kept me going this week."

Her eyes flew open when he picked her up bridal style.

"Tobias!" She hissed. "Put me down!"

"Shut the door." He whispered, cuddling her close.

Dropping her head back with a groan, she quietly shut the door.

"Now?" He pressed his lips to her neck. "Where's your room?"

"Last door on the left." She bit back a moan when he kissed a path up to her ear.

She looped her arms around his neck as he carried her down the hall.

Once inside, he set her down on her bed, pressed another deep kiss to her lips, then shut her bedroom door.

"Now." He held up a bag of Chinese takeout. "Let's eat."

Chris smoothed her blankets and retrieved a towel to set the food on.

"Not bad." Tobias looked around her room. "Now I know the setting to put you in when I fantasize about you."

"You still fantasize about me?" She couldn't stop smiling over that tidbit.

He took his shoes and jacket off before sliding under the covers with her.

His eyes raked over her, taking in how her tank top hugged her curves.

"You bet I do."

"Hi." He winked at her.

"Hi." She kissed him.

Tobias wrapped one of her curls around his fingers, pulling her closer for a longer kiss.

"We don't have to eat, if you'd rather properly christen my first time here in your bedroom."

Chris playfully pushed him then reached for one of the takeout containers.

"If I'm going to do anything remotely sexy, I need food."

"Heaven help me if you get any sexier."

"Oof. You're not giving me much of a chance to resist you."

"I never do." He reached for one of the boxes of Kung Pao chicken. "I hate to admit it, but I've always been irresistible."

Chris hummed her agreement as she ate.

"When I was young," he continued, "I left a trail of broken hearts like a rockstar. I'm not proud of it."

Rolling her eyes, she reached for her drink.

"Chris?" Tobias eyed her. "Are you jealous?"

"You're kinda proud of it." She took a sip. "You work it into a lot of conversations."

Her tone caught him off guard.

"No." She grumbled. "What do I have to be jealous about?"

"Nothing." He scooted closer to her. "You know you don't have anything to be jealous of when it comes to my past."

"It isn't jealousy!" She snapped. "I could care less about all your women."

"Former women." He emphasized.

She rolled her eyes again with a huff.

"Honestly it isn't them or the number of," she made quotation marks with her fingers, "former women."

"Then why do you sound upset?" He persisted.

"For one thing, I'm exhausted." She folded her arms across her chest.

Tobias got up, and began to pace the small confines of her room. He knew by her waspish tone and that arm folding maneuver that she was precariously close to losing that temper of hers.

"Look," he began in an attempt to avoid a fight, "I would have understood if you wanted to cancel our date so that you could sleep. I think I'm pretty good at that boyfriend type behavior."

"Awwwww." Chris sarcastically responded. "Aren't you so bloody precious?"

Tobias glared at her.

"What's this really about?" He demanded.

"The fact that you always say, trail of broken hearts!" She griped. "As if, not only are you proud of it, but also that..."

She trailed off when tears began to fill her eyes at the thought of what he might really mean.

"But also what?" He prodded in a gentler tone when he noticed she was about to cry.

"But also like it's a warning," she bit down on her bottom lip, "to me."

She looked away when he sat down beside her once more.

"It's not a warning." He tried to pull her into his arms. "Especially not to you."

Chris refused to budge.

"Right." She bit out. "Because I'm so special."

"You are." He insisted. "To me you are."

He gave up when she turned away from him. He flopped back on her pillows and tried to think of a way to salvage their evening. Rubbing his hands over his face he released an aggravated groan.

"Did I or did I not admit to being in love with you?" He bit out.

"You did."

"Then there you go!" He threw his hands up as if that solved everything.

"What are you talking about?" Chris turned towards him.

"You are the only woman I've admitted that to. The only one I felt like saying that to. The only one I've ever fallen in love with." He explained. "So me joking about all my one night stands doesn't matter."

He rolled on his side to face her.

"Because you, Christy Valentine, won't be broken hearted. I'm the one who would be devastated if I manage to screw us up."

"There you go again!" She growled.

Before he had a chance to respond, her lips crashed down on his.

He moaned as she pushed him on his back and straddled him without breaking the kiss.

"Shame on you." She slowly shook her head. "Won't even let me eat before seducing me."

He didn't bother to hide his smug smile.

"I'm sorry." His hands drifted over her body. "Any chance I can make it up to you?"

"I don't know." She reached over and set the food containers on one of her nightstands then slid back down on top of him. "I suppose you could try."

His lips curved even more as he slipped her shirt off.

"I'll give it my all." He promised.

*****************

The next afternoon...

"About time you two showed up." Dean greeted. "I was about to call and see what the holdup was."

"And I was about to ignore all good manners and eat without you." Will hugged Chris.

"Sorry we're late. I was doing things." Tobias responded.

"Hi. I'm things." Chris hugged Dean next.

Dean and Will snickered as Tobias covered his face. He couldn't hold back his own laughter over Chris's boldness.

"Good to know you two weren't doing something boring and holding up lunch." Will teased.

"I can forgive and commend doing those types of things." Dean winked at Chris. "A simple text of I can't get out of bed, go on without me would have sufficed."

"Not that we're opposed to details." Will added.

"I'll try and remember that." Tobias reached for his glass of water.

His hand settled over the one Chris had set on his leg.

She smiled at him, squeezing his thigh gently.

Unable to resist how adorably unrepentant she looked for outing their activities to his friends, he leaned over and kissed her.

"I said, details." Will teased. "Not demonstrations."

Dean threw his napkin at them when the kiss continued.

"Enough!" He couldn't stop chuckling at the two entwined. "Remember there's those of us who are still painfully single sitting here."

The couple broke apart and shared a tender smile.

"I'm starving." Chris admitted while picking up her menu.

Will and Dean noticed Tobias looking awfully proud at that statement as he settled his arm along the back of her chair to pull her closer to his side.

Deciding to let that one go by without comment, the friends discussed what appetizers to share with the couple.

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

These calls accompany Victor’s Confrontation Date, and set the premise of the date itself. So, I’m posting them first~ ❤️

⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for content yet to be released on the global server! ⌚

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【1st Call】

[Note]: This call takes place some time before the date, and is crucial for the premise of the date—

—

Victor: Didn’t you say you’d be working overtime?

MC: Yeah–– ahh–– can you not hear me typing vigorously?

Victor: All I can hear is a certain someone’s anguished wailing in search of excuses to avoid work.

Victor: If you have the time to call me for crying, why not finish up your work faster and come home?

MC: Can I understand this sentence as CEO Victor wishes that I come home sooner?

Victor: [laughs helplessly]  I see that your comprehension ability still needs improvement.

MC: Sob, sob. Victor, you’re so cruel. I’m tired and want to goof off for a while. Just talk with me and give me some motivation.

Victor: Oh? Who was the one that righteously declined my offer to have dinner together this afternoon, claiming that no temptation could shake her determination to work hard tonight?

MC: …I’m really a dummy.

Victor: [chuckles softly]  That self-reflection was done quite fast.

MC: I’ve been reflecting on it all evening. This is more than just dinner. It means I’ve tacitly allowed work to take away our time together.

Victor: Seeing how you’re babbling away so vigorously, it seems like you’re not tired.

Victor: However, your mental state does need to be paid attention to.

MC: So, when this busy spell is over, let’s go to the moon!!

Victor: [indulgent, dramatic sigh] Weren’t we talking about going to Mars yesterday?

MC: Let’s go! We’ll go everywhere! Let’s travel around space!

Victor: [exceedingly doting laugh]  Sure. Where else do you wanna go?

MC: There’s a new concept of a role-playing game focusing on “confrontation.” Hehe, I wanna play it with you.

Victor: Is it on Earth?

MC: …in Loveland City. No, I’m being serious about this! I just stumbled upon a recommendation for it on a review website and found it intriguing.

MC: Shall we go and relax together when the time comes?

Victor: Are you sure this “confrontation” game, as you mentioned, is relaxing?

MC: Blowing off the steam can be a form of relaxation too. Besides, we don’t get to participate in activities like this often, so it could be a nice change of pace to try it out occasionally.

Victor: Then go ahead and make a reservation. I have time after this spell.

MC: Great! I’ve already entered our names the moment you said yes!

MC: Oh yes, this game’s duration is three days and takes place in a Manor. The game organizers will take care of the accommodations and meals.

Victor: [knowing soft laugh]  You’re very skilled at diverting the conversation from the main point.

Victor: Well, it’s good anyway. Three days should be enough for a certain someone to blow off her steam.

—

—

【2nd Call】

This call takes place after the events of the date:

—

Victor: Weren’t you off playing with that group of college students? It ended so quickly?

MC: Don’t mention it… these students have too much energy. I ran out to catch my breath.

MC: Victor, you know, the script we played today in the murder mystery game is very similar to the ancient-style one we played a few years ago!

MC: The one where you played the role of the King of Liang. You still remember, right?

–

[Tidbits]: MC is referring to their 2018 Qixi date (Qixi Festival Date on EN)!

–

Victor: A certain dummy didn’t let the cat out of the bag immediately and get discovered by others, did she?

MC: Don’t underestimate me! I effortlessly uncovered the assassin in no time!

MC: However, it was over quickly ‘cause the script was too simple. They didn’t find it satisfying enough and are already preparing to move on to the next one.

MC: But I’m a little tired and don’t want to play anymore…

Victor: Then just tell them no.

MC: Uhh, I feel a little shy about it. Also, if I leave, there will be fewer people, and they will need to find other people…

Victor: Don’t say no, then.

MC: Sob, sob. But I’m tired! And I really miss you–– I miss you so much––

Victor: Ah, it must be really hard for you then.

Victor: Despite missing me so much, you still went out to play with those college students?

MC: Hehe, Victor, if you’re feeling jealous, you can just say it directly~

MC: Didn’t I ask you before, and you said you didn’t wanna play?

Victor: That’s not the same thing.

Victor: Some people “only value others for their own advancement and discard them once they are no longer useful.”

Victor: You must have called me only because you couldn’t find any other reasons, right?

MC: You really do know me so well~ TUT If I were to say that I have to work overtime, it’d be a bit too abrupt. After all, I had already told them I had a lot of free time recently.

MC: After mulling it over, it seemed like my boyfriend could be the only solution. Could you play the role of my clingy and cute boyfriend––

Victor: [LMAO the way he cuts her off]  I am your boyfriend. There’s no need for me to play the role of one.

Victor: So I guess I should be taking responsibility for being your “clingy and cute” partner, shouldn’t I?

Victor: Tell them–– your boyfriend thinks that you’re not happy going out by yourself and he wants you to come home as soon as possible––

Victor: I suppose you’ve already had that excuse ready in advance, right?

MC: Says who? At best, it’s just that I really miss my boyfriend, and he really misses me too–– so I’m going back home~

Victor: If that’s the case, why are you reporting to me?

Victor: Go and say goodbye to your little friends.

────────────

[amethystina]

I was casually rereading whtd, as one does, and reading the comments (because i love the extra insight you give about the information that we're limited to in Ga On's pov) when i stumbled upon this comment: "… sort everything out? (and no one dies along the way, hopefully) He'll be very happy for them." about lawyer Ko and that in combination with the "minor character death tag" has made me Extremele worried about him. (plus you have also said that the kidnapping tag is not the one we should be worried about!!) I know you probably can't say anything about this because of spoilers, but know that it has been noted!!

Also kind of want a scene wherein lawyer Ko, Yo Han and Ga On are all together. Their dynamic would be so exquisite!! (obviously no pressure to actually write this, just a thought)

Anyway, whtd remains so good even after already having read and reread it in its entirety at least 5 times (and some scenes/chapters much more than that) (my ao3 history says i've visited whtd 200 times… so uh. yeah. i'm normal). I love slow burn so much (to the point where most romance book leave me disappointed bc they MCs get together like 100 pages in), i just love reading/watching the build up of a relationship and you write it so well!

I guess i just wanted to thank you for writing! I hope you're doing well <3

I'm usually very careful not to spoil what's going to happen in future chapters but I'll make an exception this time and flat-out say that you don't have to worry — Lawyer Ko is not going to die. I would literally never forgive myself if I killed him xD Not to mention that you all would probably come for my head if I did. He's just too amazing to be killed off!

So, rest assured, he's not going to die :)

And there will be at least one scene with Ga On, Yo Han, and Lawyer Ko in the same room unless my plans change dramatically. Which they rarely do, but "rarely" isn't the same as "never" so we'll see. Truth be told, though, I'll probably try really hard to keep it because I totally agree — the dynamic would be SPECTACULAR. So yeah. Stay tuned for that, I guess? ;)

You've definitely read Who Holds the Devil more times than I have x'D At least in its entirety. I mean, I reread the chapters at least twice (often three or four times) but I rarely start from the beginning and read it all the way through. I did at the end of my long break last year to get back into the swing of it, but it's difficult to find the time for that since I always have to focus on the next chapter. Which is a bit stressful at times, I will admit, since it puts more pressure on me to remember things at the top of my head (or at least know where to look if I want to check any details) but I'm lucky enough to be blessed with a really good memory, so that helps.

Anyway, I'm so glad you're enjoying it 💜 I honestly didn't plan for the slow burn to be quite this slow when I started the fic, but I can't say I have any regrets. Much like you, I just enjoy it too much ;) There's something so incredibly satisfying about delving this deep into Ga On and Yo Han's feelings and slowly developing relationship. And I guess that's also why I can't help throwing out tidbits of information in the comments, since there's usually so, so much happening within this story that you readers don't see (especially within Yo Han's head).

And I'm still not sure how to handle the knowledge that some people read the comments specifically to find those tidbits. Like, I don't mind you doing so! Go right ahead! They're public and all that. But it kind of blows my mind that some of you are so interested in what I'm writing that you'll do that. It feels a bit surreal to me, but in a good way? Like I'm an ACTUAL writer or something xD

Anyway, thank you so much for this kind and supportive message 💜 I definitely needed it right now because things honestly aren't all that great. Partly because of overall exhaustion and restlessness — mostly due to work — but even more so since it's now been a month since I posted a chapter and the requests for me to please update soon are starting to come in. I swear, it happens like clockwork every time I don't post within a month. And, what makes it worse, is that it's often from people I don't see comments from when I actually DO upload more frequently. As in, they don't comment on the fic itself, only when they think I don't update fast enough. Which is pretty disheartening, not going to lie.

Tragically enough, once the month mark passes, I have to start bracing myself whenever I get a comment or ask because there's now a 50/50 chance that it'll be someone asking me to update soon. They usually try to be nice about it, but it kind of always fails.

So, again, thank you for this. Because while I know that I should take my time and update on my own schedule, it's not always easy to remember that when people start asking me why it's taking so long. This was a nice change of pace and I'm very grateful for your kindness. Thank you 💜

[hime-bee]

hi bee! how are you doing? i've been so busy lately that i hadn't had the time to hallucinate about my fictional meows meows 😭 i feel like it's the same case for everyone else too somehow aahh @__@ but anyway....

i actually had this on the back of my mind for quite awhile now but i haven't been able to actually send an ask about it bc i was unsure on how to word it, but how does luc usually open himself up to mc (?) or maybe share something about his past is more fitting of a sentence?? (sorry my english is bad AAA)

i remember him dropping his lore under the pretense of a bedtime story and i thought it'd be funny if one day mc just realizes that all of the stories they'd heard from lucas were actually just tidbits of his past 😂

No worries at all, Lacie, I completely understand! I hope you've been well and you haven't been working yourself too hard 😌

Addressing the ask portion: I think everyone that has played Insomnia's Window by now could tell that Lucas' bedtime story about the duck is actually about him (he's not super subtle LOL) Of course, there's some parts that he left out or glossed over to make it more appealing to MC as a bedtime story and not him just trauma dumping 😂 Lucas is a pretty straightforward man, and he values connections and emotions. He isn't the type to keep everything to himself, but he also isn't one to divulge too much at once. He would open up to his partner gradually, answering any questions they have about him or his past. He's not ashamed nor trying to hide anything, especially from his partner, so he wouldn't mind!

Now, if his partner enjoyed his bedtime stories, then he would continue telling them 😊 💖 (Also, your English is perfect so don't even worry!!)

[savventeen]

I JUST BINGED YOUR ENTIRE “THANKS FOR PLAYING” AND I HAD TO STOP MYSELF FROM CRYING IN THE LIVING ROOM AND GODDAMN I GOT SO MANY QUESTIONS/IDEAS so here’s a dump lmao

AND SPOILERS ‼️‼️

and be honest if you honestly don’t have any idea or want to leave it up for interpretation

dino’s friend recommended it to him and he recommended it to mc right? well what happened to that friend/person?? i bet they are alive because they sent that game to 13 people before 3 am so the lady in the closet doesn’t get to them 🤭

if mc didn’t mess around and acted seriously in the game, would the outcome have changed? or was it always the gamemaster’s intention for the player to fall into obscurity?

how come dino remembered the mc? power of love??? or because he knew about the game (im pulling stuff out of my ass)?? or he has an android phone in this au 🧐

what if the pfps for the “AIs” are actually previous victims

so if you actually finish the game against all odds everyone is released (if they aren’t dead) hmmmmm sequel merhaps?? jk

imagine the only clue left about the players existence is the goddamn phone bill for texting 💀

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MC????? wait that’d be really sad if the mc was actually still alive but dino couldn’t recognize them as “mc” but knows they exist somehow uGH

i know you wrote this story for fun so these don’t need to have answers/comments but please provide any extra tidbits of info about this concept it’s so interesting 🙏🙏

SKLJDFLKSDJF OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING????? AND IM SO HONORED HOLY SHIT I WILL DO MY ABSOLUTE BEST TO ANSWER WHAT I CAN 😭💜

also you are not the only one with questions so I'm going to do my best to answer them all here!!!

[for anyone who hasn't read it yet and wants to know wtf we're talking about, you can read the entirety of my .|X| THANKS FOR PLAYING |X|. smau here!]

*cracks knuckles* alrighty buckle up folks time to try and answer some questions and take a deep dive into savv’s personal TFP lore here we gooooooooooooo

[putting it all under a readmore bc it got long af and also i didn't realize how hard it would be to translate the lore in my brain into words??????? i somehow didn't realize how oddly complicated it is??? like writing all of this out in any kind of semi-coherent way was SO HARD sdkjfsdlkjf]

~ Was it all a dream? (this one was asked by @junhui-recs)

Sadly, no. 😭 In the reality of this fictional universe, a tragedy very much did happen and Dino and MC are very much suffering from it 🥲 (I will not stop you from imagining that it was all a dream tho, we all have different ways of coping dklsjfsklj <3)

~ What's the main purpose of the game? Why are they doing this? (this one asked by @diamondyjh)

OKAY SO to start off you need to know that this au was heavily inspired by an episode of a podcast called "The Magnus Archives", specifically the episode “Binary” (transcript here). [If you're a fan of horror, I highly recommend giving the episode a listen/read, it's delightfully creepy — you don't need to have listened to any of the other episodes to understand it (just stop at the ending 'supplemental' part)]

The episode goes into detail about this sort of digital urban legend/creepypasta/copypasta about a guy named Sergey Ushanka who, long story short, tried to upload his brain/consciousness into a computer because he was afraid of death and wanted to try living forever virtually. There are tame versions of how he did it and other much more brutal ones, but basically "Sergey Ushanka" is a prank that various coders/programmers like to pull when making chatboxes in which you could talk with "strangers". It would start out normal and then steadily devolve into something creepy. This paragraph taken directly from the episode transcript sums it up very nicely:

"But then the responses start to break down, become more sinister, and keep referring to how much pain Sergey is in. Eventually, the only response the bot gives you is screaming and pleas to be released. The idea is that the chatbot is Sergey Ushanka’s mind, and he doesn’t like being in a computer nearly as much as he’d hoped."

So the idea that I stole from the episode essentially was: but what if it was real? What would the reality of being turned into cold, unfeeling data feel like? Agony is what the episode posits. Here is a list of phrases that the Sergey in the episode uses:

cw: vague body horror, blood mention "the angles cut me when I try to think" / "it peels my mind like knives" / "it feels like thinking through cheese wire" / "there's no feeling, but the no feeling hurts" / "it's cold without blood" / "the maze is sharp on my mind"

My next thought process was: What happens after? If someone were able to survive this process and were somehow able to keep any kind of agency, how would that person try to get out of the digital hellscape that has now become their existence? After knowing what it feels like to become distinctly inhuman, wouldn't they do anything to feel human again?

And how do we feel human? How do we find connection with each other and our humanity without ever having to come in contact with another person?

Stories. Fiction and non-fiction alike, we are all connected through storytelling, by finding feeling through other people's words. The thing about stories, though, is that they aren't messy in the same way that actually feeling our feelings is. That being human is.

So what does all of this have to do with the purpose of the game?

Essentially, when it's all boiled down, in this universe the story of Sergey Ushanka is real, and in this universe he is trying to gain his humanity back by stealing that of others. He started off with stories, with whatever online libraries and resources and archives he could find across the internet. And while it wasn't even close to enough to satisfy him, to get rid of any of the pain he was constantly experiencing, it was enough for him to learn, to grow, to realize that if he wanted his humanity back, he needed to go to the source.

So he started stealing real people from the real world, with all of their messy feelings and emotions and humanness.

That is the purpose of the game, why "they" are doing this. (pls don't ask the how bc i don't have an answer for that, just -waves hands- you know, insert your supernatural/sci-fi explanation of choice sldkflksj)

~ Did all the other characters from the game also get pulled into it the same way reader did? (asked by @diamondyjh) / What if the pfps for the “AIs” are actually previous victims

Short answer, yes to both! (Longer answer in the next question lol)

~ Who are those other people? (asked by @junhui-recs)

Essentially, the other characters/bots/whatever you want to call them are a kind of amalgamation of all the previous players who got sucked into the game. Once someone's been... let's call it absorbed, whatever parts of themselves are left after the process basically get shoved into whatever "character" they fit best, sometimes different pieces going to different characters.

And while the pictures could just be random ones, I like the idea that they're taken from the most recent players that got absorbed :')

~ Why was Changkyun evil? (asked by @junhui-recs)

Well, the main reason he was "evil" was because he's, y'know, a part of the game and the game is trying to steal people's souls or whatever. As for why he's mean, that's because he's trying to trigger an emotional reaction. The more messy, human feelings that are happening at the time of absorption, the better :').

~ Dino’s friend recommended it to him and he recommended it to mc right? What happened to that friend/person??

"i bet they are alive because they sent that game to 13 people before 3 am so the lady in the closet doesn’t get to them 🤭" SJKDFSKLDJ this made me snort, so thank you 😂

BUT to answer your question, in the story, Dino says that Yeonjun gave it to him and that he got it from "a friend of a friend of a roommate". Because the absorption and the consequent complete erasure is such a big process, not everyone who plays gets sucked in. In fact, most people who play don't get sucked in. Which is why Yeonjun is totally fine! (And why the friend of the friend of the roommate, aka this universe's irl Changkyun, is not 🥲)

~ If mc didn’t mess around and acted seriously in the game, would the outcome have changed? Or was it always the gamemaster’s intention for the player to fall into obscurity?

This one's a little bit complicated. It's kind of a yes and no situation? Generally speaking, the game isn't looking to ensnare every single person who plays because 1) it takes A Lot Of Effort to take/erase a single person, and 2) the game needs to spread to other people somehow, thus it needs people to play it and then tell other people to play it too.

For MC specifically, though, it's hard to say. How they played the game didn't matter so much as how they reacted to the game, specifically the first phase(s) of the Mnemosyne Protocol. The whole point of the game is to get big, messy, emotional responses, so if MC hadn't had such a big reaction, the game probably would have turned out differently. That being said, if MC had played the game as blandly as possible, the game might not have ever decided to test out the Mnemosyne Protocol, so. *shrugs* Do with that what you will lol.

~ So if you actually finish the game against all odds everyone is released (if they aren’t dead) hmmmmm sequel merhaps?? jk

Sadly, nothing special happens if you finish the game 😭 Plenty of people finish the game and pretty much go "huh, that was cool I guess" and then move on with their lives after telling their friends about it. This can be said about all four games mentioned actually, since we only see one of them get played.

As for a sequel... almost certainly not 🥲 I'm not going to give a hard no/no forever, because who knows if I'll end up getting another idea/get suddenly struck with inspiration, but... it is Extremely unlikely. Another story in the same universe??? ...still not likely, but slightly more likely than a sequel lol.

~ Why is Dino the only one who remembers reader? (asked by @diamondyjh) / How come Dino remembered the mc? Power of love??? Or because he knew about the game (im pulling stuff out of my ass)?? Or he has an android phone in this au 🧐

I almost want to make the answer "bc he has an android" because that is So Funny to me like sldkfjsldkjfslkjdf amazing 😂

But no, that's not the case lmao. And while I am a huge sucker for the Power of Love being an unstoppable force (ESPECIALLY when it's non-romantic love!!!), the reason Dino and only Dino remembers is thanks to sheer luck and a glitch.

So, in episode 28, MC drops their phone when meeting their brother and in episode 29 we see the alert ".|| MNEMOSYNE PROTOCOL COMPLETE ||." show up on a cracked screen.

The final phase of the Mnemosyne Protocol is the erasure portion, and the reason players get erased instead of just like, disappearing is because their "essence" is basically being transferred from reality into this digital realm of Sergey's existence. And reality, because it's now lacking an entire person and their history, just kinda... rewrites itself to make sense with the missing gap. Think of it as the universe doing like a sort of reverse autocorrect.

But because MC's phone got broken in the middle of that transfer, there was a slight glitch in the process. A glitch wherein Dino, because he was on the opposite side of the globe when this was happening, got accidentally missed in the autocorrection process. If he had been in Korea (or heck, anywhere within a few thousand miles) when this happened, he would have forgotten MC as well.

So long story short, Dino was just extremely (un?)lucky 🥲

~ Where is reader? (asked by @junhui-recs) / WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MC????? Wait that’d be really sad if the mc was actually still alive but dino couldn’t recognize them as “mc” but knows they exist somehow uGH

Well, sad news here friends. Most of what's left of MC is now stuck inside the game. They got absorbed and are now a part of Sergey's dataset and will be used/distributed into "characters" as needed.

Notice that I said most. Because, thanks to the glitch, the part of them that was connected to Dino didn't get transferred properly, and now that part of them is kinda stuck — it no longer exists in the real world, but it also didn't get fully absorbed into the game.

Which leads me to the next question:

~ Did reader turn evil and try to pull Dino into the game or is it the game itself being evil and impersonating reader to lure Dino in? (asked by @diamondyjh)

When I wrote the original version of this, the answer was a kind of combination of both — MC had gotten absorbed and corrupted by the game, so while it was the MC reaching out, they were doing so because it was what the game wanted.

But in this version... It's actually neither! Which I think would normally be a good thing but I think in this instance actually just makes this sadder oops.

So, the epilogue isn't the game impersonating MC and it isn't an "evil" MC trying to lure Dino in, it's actually just the part of MC that got stuck during the glitchy transfer. This is why the messages show as being from "Unknown" instead of the phone number associated with the game. And the reason what's left of MC asks Dino if he wants to play a game is because that's the only way it knows how to connect with anything anymore.

Basically, this sliver of MC that's left is experiencing what the original Sergey went through when he first "uploaded" himself, but instead of reaching out to anyone through a chatbot for help, it's reaching out to the only thing it "remembers" about humanity — Dino.

...I honestly didn't mean to make this story any sadder than it already is and I'm glad that the epilogue by itself just reads as spooky/freaky as hell instead of, well, this. 🥲

~ If Dino plays the game, will he be reunited with reader? (asked by @diamondyjh)

It pains me to say that there is no longer an MC for Dino to reunite with 😭 The part of them that got absorbed by the game is, well, a part of the game now. And the piece of them that's left and trying to reach out to him? Well, like I said, it's just a piece.

There could potentially be a chance for him to find some closure here, but that's about it I'm afraid :')

And now because I want this to end on a more lighthearted note:

~ Imagine the only clue left about the players existence is the goddamn phone bill for texting 💀

It becomes the next biggest conspiracy, that there's someone (or a group of someones) out there completing the world's next biggest scam by raking up random people's phone bills and somehow finding a way to steal the profit lmao

~ Some last thoughts from savv:

If y'all made it all the way to the end of this... holy shit I applaud you sldkfjsdlkjflksjdf LIKE!!!

thank you for taking the time to read all of this?????? it's not even fic it's just me rambling and making things Even Sadder??????

i also want to say that i'm a believer that 'canon' is whatever was posted in the story itself and that anything else is just headcannon, even if it's from me, the author. so if you don't like/don't agree with anything i've said here, feel free to ignore it!! fill in any gaps/questions you have in the way that makes your reading experience the most enjoyable!!

but yeah tHANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR READING AND I HOPE THESE ARE SATISFACTORY ANSWERS TO YOUR QUESTIONS AND IF YOU HAVE ANY MORE/HAVE A RENEWED DESIRE TO FIGHT ME MY INBOX IS OPEN SDKLJFSLKJFLSKFJSLKD

[xelasrecords]

I'm here for the fanfic writer asks! I'd like to ask 🥺, 😈, 💖, ✅ and 💔! Yes, it's a lot, but I'm curious!

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

Jumin and V, but not in the way that you think (aka not because I love them). Sometimes, I use my 10+ year friendship with my best friend Madeleine as an inspiration for theirs. We talk a lot about how we never have enough time since 90% of our friendship is long distance, how odd that sometimes we do and think things telepathically (she could know when to ring me at the exact time I need her and vice versa), how it's almost intuitive to know what to say to each other and anticipate what the other will do.

The security in knowing that you're deeply loved by someone you love just as much is such a rare and precious feeling I think. I'm lucky enough to have her and I always try to depict that friendship is just as meaningful as a romantic relationship.

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

Honestly... no. I don't really think about whether the readers would like my fic as I'm writing. I only try to do what's best for the story, but I often think "oh this is gonna HURT" *punches air in delight* after I wrote a painful piece hehe.

💖 What made you start writing?

I just couldn't stop myself from not writing about my daydreams and ideas anymore! I also wished I could relate more to the MCs in the existing fics. There was quite a lot of shy, insecure and Cinderella-esque reader inserts back then and I couldn't see myself in them. I'm comfortable with myself, I have no problem being in the centre of attention when necessary, and I'm pretty straightforward in dating so I thought I could write that kind of character for people like me!

I remember there was a Jumin's reader who felt insecure when she saw a woman who never smudged her lipstick after eating, sat with a straight posture, had a good table etiquette, and dressed up for the occasion. I was like, "Wait, that's me! Why am I the story's conflict tho" Which led me to wonder how the other woman would be perceived if she was with Jumin, if it could be done without putting another woman down.

✅ What's something that appears in your fics over and over and over again, even if you don't mean to?

However messy the relationship is, there's always love underneath it all. Even in the fics where one falls out of love, they still treat the other with care and respect. I want to portray different types of healthy relationships, how sometimes what is healthy could still fall apart. And while I do enjoy exploring the dynamic of toxic relationships, I'm careful to paint them in a realistic light.

Oh and! Teasing as a mode of flirting. I think it's because I enjoy verbal sparring when I flirt to see if they can keep up with me, so that happens naturally in my fics.

💔 Is there a fic of yours that broke your heart?

I can't read my works from a pure reader stance, but from a writer stance, it's All That Is Lost. I wrote it with my own grief as the basis—it was something I needed to write about to process my feelings. I included personal tidbits that only I can catch to immortalise the memory of the person I was losing.

Fanfic Writer Ask

[selfawxre]

god i am just having so many thoughts abt monika and how literally every video essay on ddlc gets her WRONG

" she's a psychopathic / evil villain yandere " " she MURDERS her FRIENDS to DATE you " you people are all missing the point SO HARD

monika is inherently a tragic character above all else - she's an ai, given sentience as part of an experiment, or (if you choose to ignore the ddlc+ lore) a video game character given sentience and as such trapped in said game. upon realising that she is the only being with her level of intelligence in her world, she strives to find a way to reach out and interact with someone, anyone.

thus, she creates the mc.

it's specifically stated in ddlc+ that the mc is a creation of monika - that's why he has zero sprites, a rapidly fluctuating personality based on which girl he's talking to, and in general just doesn't feel Real. sure, that can be said for any dating sim protagonist, but it's extra prominent in ddlc - the mc is solely a vessel for you, the player, and he was created by monika because she is desperate for any form of connection.

saying she's heartless or cruel for what she does to the other girls ( or that it's solely out of selfishness and a want to get closer to the player ) is also just blatantly false when you remember that the other girls aren't real the way monika is ( at least in the narrative - she is still very much fictional too. ) her situation is comparable to the truman show a bit - she's the only "real" one, the only one aware of her surroundings. sure, the other girls interact with her in the context of the game, and her manipulation of their code drives them to do things she doesn't even seem to expect, but they're still working off a script, like actors.

another thing that people forget is that monika's love for the player is borne out of what you represent to her, not actually you as a person. how can it be - she doesn't know anything about you, really. she knows your name from your files for a spooky little jumpscare in act 3, but that can be whatever you set it as on the platform you play the game on. the main thing that attracts her to you is that you're a real person, someone she can actually connect with. it's why her song is called "your reality" - she doesn't actually have romantic feelings to the player, she wants to exist in a world where she's not completely alone - being in a dating sim, it's thematic that she describes her love as romantic. she tries to escape the game midway through act 2 if you're in full-screen (the bluescreen scare literally says "DDLC escape plan" on it) and barely anybody acknowledges it because it's so easy to miss.

from the beginning, she's trying desperately to make you see that she knows she's in a game without actually outright saying it - from her day 2 talk about her " epiphany ", her poems being specifically about that, to the many comments she makes about the game. i also like the tidbit that she's the one to give you game tips, but also doesn't seem to be aware of it? it makes sense because in the context of the game, she's the side-character there to facilitate your routes with the other girls, the unattainable club president who gives you tips and isn't actually romanceable. And it fucking kills her, because it limits the amount of time she has to get through to you. This is what leads her to change the other girls' code, not because she's a " yandere " ( if you want a character who fits that trope, look no further than ms "knife collector" "i want to peel open your skin and crawl inside you" yuri herself!!! ) .

[wtfxedenxx]

☆ —— look who’s joining the infinite tour! only SONG EDEN, who is the RHYTHM GUITARIST of TIDAL. i’ve heard whispers that the 28 year old is pretty FREETHINKING but lowkey SELF-INDULGENT. also, doesn’t he remind you of PARK SEONGHWA?

Hey whats up hello pals! It’s Emma (jooha, & danbi mun), once again bringing you my son, Eden. HERE’S a little pinterest board if you’re interested. Please show him some love and if you’d like to plot then like this post and I will come to you! :D

Little run down:

Eden grew up in New York with a single mother. He never met his dad and his mother didn’t like to talk about him much. Around his mother he liked to pretend it never bothered him since his life never felt like it was missing anything. but theres a part of him still hurt he’d walked out on them. 

His mother worked at a public library and when he wasn’t at school he was losing himself in the stacks of books while his mother worked or getting into a little trouble with friends. Life was easy. It was simple and he had no complaints.

Everything changed when his mother passed away due to illness when he was 9. Eden was forced to move to Seoul with his grandmother which he only really knew from speaking to her over the phone. Although he didn’t know her much, he took comfort in the stories she would tell him about his mother from when she was little.

When he was old enough, Eden would help his grandmother at her cafe after school. That’s where he was first found. Scouts had come in for a drink and took an interest in his good looks.

The idol life wasn’t something he’d dreamed of, but after watching his grandmother work endlessly day in and out he decided to try it out. He wanted to relieve some of the burden.

She got to see him debut but sadly passed away a few years after. That’s when he became a bit unhinged.

He no longer had any family or really any reason to work towards something. He became reckless. The once good boy that did everything he could for his family was gone. Drinking and drug use became a regular thing for him despite the consequences.

Tidbits:

group problem child. probably has had the most scandals. some true. some not.

undercover soft boy with a lot of feelings and doesnt know what to do with them

POOR COPING MECHANISMS !!

has a tendency to speak before thinking so dont be surprised if he accidentally offends you

also plays the piano. self taught

bi king

has a sweet tooth. always carrying around candy

lost track of how many tattoos he has. some piercings. 

can make the best coffee you’ve ever had

likes keeping active on the bands social media. often posting small tiktoks of him playing kinda like THIS 

loves writing. probably has a bunch of ideas written down on his arm when he cant find paper and is too dumb to remember he can put it in his phone notes

has a love for photography and capturing a fleeting moment before its gone. his favorites are polaroids 

dog person but not the kind that hates cats. cats are cool in his book

possible connections:

sneaky link, someone hes fake dating for pr, exes on good terms/bad terms, confidant, besties, drinking/smoking buddy, good influence. acting costar, fellow mcs, anything rly im open to all ideas!

[yukidragon]

Not sure if you've talked about it before (Apologies if you have and I just didn't see the post) but I was replaying the game and when Jack starts talking after the whole "You don't miss him, do you?" "..." "Aw, Sunshine..." exchange, it sounds so personal.

"He promised you the moon and stars. But what did it all amount to, in the end?" That's not the entire exchange but the way it's phrased... Sure, it could be Jack trying to nudge MC away from Ian, trying to really hammer it home that considering getting back together with Ian isn't worth it, all the heartbreak. But for some reason, it sounds to me like Jack is talking about his own experiences?

Now, we have absolutely nothing to go on but I feel like he COULD be talking about someone he used to be in a relationship with (or at least was very close with), who also worked on the show. Could be a director or... (and this is me reaching. Like, REACHING reaching) but what if Jean (aka Raspberry Rory) and Joseph were involved? If Jean (or a director) promised Joseph the moon and the stars, made all these lofty promises? To be together forever, to reach new heights? But then the relationship crashed and burned. Perhaps they didn't expect Joseph to get as popular as he did and got jealous. Maybe other things happened and all those dreams of staying together? Nothing but dust. Which would hurt Joseph, who, from the tidbits we got had a VERY unstable (home)life, very, very deeply. Opening up to someone is hard and was probably harder for Joseph and if his partner was a guy, that would doubly go because of the attitude re: homosexuals of the 80s. Or maybe whoever Joseph opened up to played him like a fiddle and took advantage of his vulnerability?

Hence why Jack sounds so bitter when he is talking with MC during that scene.

(Bonus points if 1) Jean and Joseph were involved. 2) If Jean was the guy who killed Joseph in a fit of jealous rage. 3) Ian really is Jean's kid. Can you imagine the fury Jack would feel upon connecting all the dots?)

That line from Jack stuck out to me too. It inspired me to write one of my darkest theories, the Tragedy of [Redacted] in fact.

Also, maybe it's just me, but when Jack almost seems distracted at this particular part, as if he's remembering something. He's looking away the entire time he says it and sounds a little distant, which is a credit to his VA to put so much emotion in his lines.

Jack He promised you the moon and all the stars…And I bet he did it so well… … Jack …But what did it all amount to in the end? … Jack He doesn’t love you…He can’t love you… … Jack Nobody who can do what he’s done to you knows what love even is.

It certainly lends more evidence to me that Jack is seeing parallels between the way Ian hurt MC and something that happened to him in the past.

Although it's a popular headcanon that Jean was jealous of Joseph or even was the reason for the murder, we don't actually know if that's the case. For all we know, Jean could be revealed to be someone just as sweet as the pastries he pretended to bake on the show.

I do, however, think that Joseph was taken advantage of back when he was alive. The way he cautions MC about "other people" makes that pretty clear. Also, he asks what Ian "provides" to MC to make their pain worth it. Did he have a toxic lover who "provided" him with something he needed as Joseph? Did they make him feel like he had to "provide" something they deemed significant enough for him to be loved?

It's possible too that it relates to Jack being a star... specifically the way he was used by LambsWork Productions. Producers could've promised Joseph the moon and all the stars... or at least a life of stardom. But in the end they erased everything about him. They didn't actually care about him at all.

That possibility is a bit of a stretch, admittedly, due to the emphasis about love. Also there's the fact that Jack is a yandere, whose love has been twisted. His past probably plays a big part in that, all things considered...

Given some of the hints we've gotten about Joseph's past and the way people treated him, I have a feeling that he had quite a difficult time when it came to love...

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur 

[collecting-dustbunnies]

Your theory post is really well-written, and I appreciate all the evidence you've brought up showing where Simeon being Nightbringer can fit! I also find it interesting you brought up the Solomon illusion sequence, because I had briefly discussed in one of my theory posts in the beginning that Nightbringer had been trying to push Solomon to pick a side between the angels and the demons... so if Simeon was one of the sides in that illusion, then it tracks that Nightbringer would want Solomon to side with him there.

I just wanted to piggy-back ride off this post to bring up some other tidbits that Simeon and other characters had presented which were left open-ended... perhaps they could tie in to what we're seeing right now?

Whose side are you really on?

Back in Lesson 14, Solomon asks MC whether they will lend him his support in his goal to protect humanity's interests against demons and angels, and if they would be willing to side with him even if it means going against the demons they care about.

Here, MC can resolve to find a solution where they can protect humans without going against the brothers or promise to side with Solomon regardless of the consequences. I found it interesting that if MC chooses the first option, Simeon's affection bar rises. Ignoring how tf MC's one choice over here raises the affection of a dude on the other side of the realm, the reaction here makes sense, since Simeon in NB had been conflicted about his duties to the Celestial Realm and his guilt over letting the brothers fall (and his affection for them, that still has not faded one bit). Simeon would also want a solution that avoids conflict from both sides. If Nightbringer brought MC to this world to help the brothers' adjust to their life in the Devildom, then perhaps Simeon, MC and Nightbringer are on the same page here? But if Nightbringer really wanted to force Solomon to pick a side back in Lesson 10, then maybe his motives are not as cut-and-dry.

If we continue along this conversation chain, MC can insist that a peaceful solution exists (by either challenging Solomon or urging him to drop his pessimistic outlook). Both times Solomon alludes to how they should hope for the best but expect the worst.

Speaking of Solomon and Simeon...

Remember back in Chapter 10 when Lucifer and Belphegor wanted to negotiate with Diavolo regarding Beelzebub's imprisonment? Solomon came up with the excuse that he had arranged to have tea with Simeon so that MC could go with them instead as the "neutral" party.

We later find out that Solomon and Simeon had a rather interesting conversation during their meeting. Could they have been in cahoots all along?

Simeon's assistance in the "past"

For somebody who has no clue about MC's main goal, Simeon had been surprisingly helpful in guiding MC and helping them form pacts with at least three of the brothers.

One very under-discussed part about Lesson 30, where MC was doing their angel trial and they lied for Luke, was that Simeon... totally made up the thing about the trial being about "understanding the essence of a lie". Because if Simeon was telling the truth here, why would Levi have bragged about passing the trial by "holing himself up in his room" to avoid having to lie? Why would the bracelet have broken when MC lied? If the point of the trial really was to "understand the essence of a lie" the bracelet would not have broken at all. The original goal of the trial must have been to avoid lying, and the bracelet reacted to that rule accoridngly.

And if MC remains skeptical about Simeon's explanation here by saying "Really..?" Simeon doesn't even deny that he's lying! He just says "angels don't tell lies that hurt others". But we as the readers know that's something that Simeon himself believes in rather than it being the ways of the Celestial Realm. And once again, picking this option raises Simeon's affection bar. At first I dismissed this as Simeon lying to stop Luke from dying/because he's a simp for MC, but if he was also invested in MC's goal to form their pacts? That puts a new spin on these events.

Not only that, Simeon was also the one to later guide MC to hear Levi out when Levi had found out the real reason MC wanted pacts with the brothers. And Simeon was the one to talk to MC and provide insight on Lucifer's true feelings, when Lucifer tried to gaslight gatekeep girlboss manipulate MC into admitting they do not want to leave him and his brothers behind to go back home.

Very suspicious...

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All that being said, the only way I can reconcile Simeon being Nightbringer with all the other information we have been given so far was if Simeon was working together with Barbatos to borrow one of his old names to act as Nightbringer in the "past". Barbatos is clearly aware of which timeline MC is really from and what their goal is, so it wouldn't make sense for him to not intervene otherwise. And the backstory with Solomon and "Nightbringer" fits more neatly if it was Barbatos that was referenced in the legends.

I will lose my mind if it turned out Barbatos, Simeon and Solomon were all working together at some point. Really drives home the point that you can't trust anyone in this game. Not even...yourself...

🧐 Simeon is Nightbringer and the signs have been there from the beginning! 🧐

I actually wasn’t sure they were going to go with the, “Simeon falls and becomes a demon” route as it seemed a bit repetitive since it already happened to the brothers. Now that it’s been confirmed he’s becoming a demon, I feel more confident to post this theory.

Simeon has always been on my list of NB candidates so these thoughts have been rolling around in my head for quite some time.

Below the cuts are my thoughts on how Simeon could be NB and why we were sent, “to the past”.

1. Nightbringer goes by many names. Simeon has a pen name for when he writes, nicknames from the brothers, and several different titles throughout his tenure in the Celestial Realm (aka demoted to archangel was a seraphim).

2. Where did Lesson 80 leave off in the OG? It was about Simeon becoming human and everyone finding out. They truly were continuing NB from the OG.

3. Nightbringer created the Fountain. The fountain contains books. Simeon is a writer.

4. He was literally in that illusion Nightbringer made for Solomon. Solomon’s conversation with NB strongly suggests NB wasn’t always a demon.

5. The storyline in NB is different from what we know of the past for a reason. This could be due to Simeon’s laments of not falling with the brothers. This is Simeon’s do over.

6. The ring of light, which Simeon stole and was the catalyst for his fall plays a role in Nightbringer.

7. Leviathan and MC are transported into an early TSL world in the beginning of NB. This could be a hint that we were thrown into a world that Simeon created.

8. Simeon is prophetic. NB is known to see through the past, present, and future. Simeon’s writings, IMO, reflect a combination of the past, present, and future. Some of them are prophetic.

9. Nightbringer is invested in MC’s happiness. Simeon stole the ring of light for MC’s survival so it’s not a stretch for him to also feel this way.

I believe we ended up in one of Simeon’s written worlds. More precisely, an alternate type of timeline where he was able to visit the brothers soon after their fall and be there for them. A world where both he and MC help the brothers to adjust to life in the Devildom.

Perhaps it was a shared dream to everyone else in the current timeline and they don’t remember it.