#but I still wanna finish it bc there’s a lot I like
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𐙚 i want it ⋆ h.js x fem! reader pt. 2
part one ⋆ part two
pairing: han jisung x inexperienced! reader genre: smut, smau warnings: swearing ⋆ spit kink⋆ virginity ⋆ needy han ⋆ slight perv!han ⋆ reader is called “baby” and “pretty girl” ⋆ no use of “y/n” ⋆ reader is referred to by she/her pronouns ⋆ piv ⋆ munch jisung ⋆ oral sex (fem recieving) ⋆ fingering ⋆ light cum play ⋆ lots of praise ⋆ dialogue heavy wc: 3.2k synopsis: a week after jisung eats you out, he takes your virginity at your eager request. author's note: i feel like this is a safe enough space to say that i kinda didn’t wanna write this pt 2. i struggled a lot, but it’s finally finished!! didn’t wanna leave you guys hanging so i pushed through and delivered! if you like it feel free to reblog or comment bc those make my day <3
© dollracha do not copy reupload or repost.
a pit of guilt grows in jisung’s gut. he promised you months ago that he’d take it slow. he broke that promise the moment it got too difficult to keep his dick in his pants. months ago, you would barely make out with him. you were so shy when it came to being intimate. but slowly, you got more used to it. slowly.
he promised you that your first time together would be at the right moment. and he begged to get your pussy in his mouth before you were ready. he was such an awful boyfriend.
at least, that’s what he thought.
jisung was oblivious to the lust that clouded your mind the following days. the way you’d wake up in the morning, only to feel slick between your thighs from the wet dreams the night before. the way you’d be going about your day, and suddenly the image of your boyfriend rubbing his dick on your pussy flashes in your mind. or the way you fantasize at night about how it’d feel to experience it all over again–his tongue, his fingers. how you'd fall asleep to the thought of his cock inside you.
he started a fire inside you without even knowing, and he needed to quell it before you lost your mind.
he’s barely even went further than kissing you since he ate you out. you know that jisung is scared to force you. but you also know that you’re ready.
instead of asking him to fuck you, like any rational person would do, you decide the best way to what you want is to seduce him into it. it isn’t hard. really, it’s stupid easy. even a virgin can do it.
⋆ ⋆ ⋆
when jisung gets into your apartment, all he wants to do is cuddle you while you stroke his hair. it’s one of the tamer things he’s been dreaming of all day.
“baby?” he says, and shuts your apartment door. it’s silent. “baby?”
“bedroom.” is all you reply. when he opens the door, he pauses. he definitely had something to say with the way his mouth hangs open, but as soon as he sees you it’s thrown out the window. you see his adams apple bob as he swallows, and takes in the sight of you: naked except for a thin, cropped camisole and panties, your sweatshirt barely covering your arms before it falls to the floor.
“jisung.” you try your best to keep the amusement out of your voice.
“shit! sorry, baby.” he snaps out of it quickly, adverting his gaze to the wall behind you. half of his thoughts for the past week come back to him all at once. seeing you barely covered makes the blood rush to his face, and his dick. it’s an instant reminder of how he had you just a week ago. he doesn’t look back to you, he might be strong enough mentally, but his dick sure isn’t. traitor.
“how was your day?” you're so casual about it, sauntering up to him and hugging him like you're not practically naked in front of him. like your tits don't press up against his chest when you hug him tightly.
“good. it was good. i missed you.” he's trying to stay calm. keep his dick from flying out of his pants like some deranged, horny adolescent who just discovered porn.
“yeah? still wanna cuddle like you wanted to earlier?” you ask, referencing a text he sent you a few hours ago.
screw his dick, his heart needed you more.
jisung sits on your bed, his back resting against the headboard. he watches as you climb into his lap, bare thighs against his sweats. you're so warm, and you smell so good… you're gonna kill him one day.
the moment your hands are in his hair, he's taking a deep, grounding breath. he loves when you play with his hair, it's the perfect stress relief for him. his girl, all pretty in his lap, running her fingers through his hair. dream come fucking true.
jisung can't help the low groan that escapes his lips as he adjusts his position. his arms wrap around you, shifting you in his lap so you're not sitting on his dick.
“fuck, baby.” he mutters. his eyes are shut, teeth biting at his lip to keep himself quiet.
it's cute, really. how worked up your boyfriend gets over you. you can't help but kiss the corner of his mouth, your hands cupping his cheeks as you try to push things further.
“kiss me, jisung?” the way you ask him is so sweet, so innocent sounding. like you don’t have a plan (you do) and all the pieces aren’t falling into place (they are). he can't resist, leaning up to kiss you short, sweet, and chaste.
it's not enough. you take charge, kissing him and shifting in his lap to get a better angle. he gets the message, and lets you lead the kiss. in no time you're deepening it, your tongue in his mouth, and jisung's quick to pull back, your unusual boldness finally catching him off guard.
“you good, baby?”
“mhm.”
“really?”
“you haven't kissed me in forever.” you're quick to defend yourself with a pout. forever, a week… same thing.
“c'mon, baby. you know i don't wanna rush you… i wanna take it slow with you, you asked me that and i'm doing my best…” he's looking at you like you’re too good for him, or he’s too bad for you. “you really don't know how hard that is for me, sometimes.” he mutters, eyes averting away from you. his hands come to rest on your hips, and it illustrates his point: he can't keep his hands off you.
“you're so gorgeous… prettiest girl i’ve ever seen. and you've got no idea how badly i just wanna push you down on the bed and fuck you sometimes.” jisung takes his hands off you, like they'll betray him. his hands ball up into fists at his sides. “you deserve someone who's able to wait for you, patiently.”
you don't like the implication of jisung's words. that you might ‘deserve’ someone better than him. your hands reach for his wrists, and guide his hands back to your body where they currently belong.
“i don't want anyone else, jisung, only you. it felt good when you ate me out. i liked it. i want more.” you cup his cheeks, forcing him to look at you. “fuck me. please?” you ask, thumbing over his cheeks. your eyes are so warm, so full of love for your just slightly perverted boyfriend.
“i don't wanna make you wait anymore. i'm ready now. please? i want it.”
jisung can't resist you: his dick is throbbing in his sweats, his mind clouded because you look so damn good on his lap. you're begging him to take your virginity. you’re clearing up the doubt and guilt in his mind. who is he to deny you any further?
“i love you.” he grins, shaking his head. his hands travel up from your hips to your waist, and he presses a quick kiss to your cheek. “lie down, baby. let me take care of you.”
you’re quick to push yourself off his lap, and lie down beside his sitting form. there’s an air of excitement bouncing between you two as he kneels between your legs. he sits back to admire you beneath him.
the way your hair lies behind you, the eager look in your eyes, the gloss of your lips from the messy kiss you shared. the way your top scrunches up beneath your tits, the strap barely falling off your shoulder. It’s the little nuances of your appearance that have him feeling like the wind’s been knocked from his lungs, and he wants to commit that beauty to memory, write about it like he’ll ever find the right words to describe you.
debauched. hot. perfect. ‘mine’.
he can’t control himself, hands wandering your body to brush up your thighs. they reach your ribs and begin pushing up your top, freeing your tits for him to grope and tease. he takes in the way your breath catches, notes the things he does what makes you react. you’re so reactive and all he’s done is feel you up.
“shh… baby, i know…” he whispers as he takes your nipple between his thumb and index finger to give it a rough pinch. “want it so bad, right? want me to just put it in?”
you nod. he’s worked you up quickly. “not yet. my girl deserves a special first time. i can’t just put it in. what kind of boyfriend would i be?”
“but, ji–” jisung’s hands trailing down your ribcage to your hips. his thumbs soothe over the skin, but his grip is firm, and keeps you in your place.
“don’t be a brat.” the sudden sternness in his voice has you shutting up immediately. you don’t think he’s ever spoken to you with such strictness… it turns you on. with that, he stands, and pulls you to the edge of the bed.
“let me take care of you.” his voice is softer as he speaks and drops to his knees on the floor. he ends all your thoughts of impatience the moment he begins kissing up your inner thighs. “gotta prep my girl first, okay?”
there’s a gentleness in his touch, as he spreads your thighs a little wider, taking in the sight of you. as if he didn’t make you cum on his tongue with no regards for your virgin status just a week ago. “relax f’me.”
he spreads your pussy open with two fingers, and in seconds there’s a slow, wet trail of his spit dripping down your clit. jisung starts with slow, gentle licks that have you melting into his touch. he works up a fire inside you that spreads with every deep shallow breath, every barely audible whine from your lips. when your wetness and his saliva are all glistening across his chin, he pulls away. “how’s it feel, pretty girl?”
“good.” you breathe out, and suck in a deep breath. “want more.” you roll your hips, desperate to get his mouth back on you.
"yeah? more what?” jisung rubs your thighs, giving you a break whether you like it or not. it’s a form of self control for himself as well, he can’t get lost in eating you out if he stops. “what do you want more of, baby? tell me.”
honestly, you don’t know. you just want more of the feeling he’s giving you, the fire that builds slowly and threatens to take your breath away. luckily, jisung is more than happy to give you options. “want more of my mouth? or do you want to try my fingers?”
“just wanna feel good.” you decide, and jisung smiles. you’re cute, and you trust him with to make you feel good, even if you don’t know what you want. he’s eager now, your plea spurring him on. jisung teases his finger at your entrance, and slowly inserts it as he begins to suck on your clit. it’s not enough, not for jisung. as soon as he feels you relaxing around one finger, he’s quick to insert anther. it’s not a hard stretch. not when your pussy’s being so greedy, sucking in his fingers as he sucks on your clit.
all the while you’re moaning his name so sweetly, rutting your hips up into his mouth like he’s just a pillow for you to hump. “fuck, baby…” he’s moaning into your pussy, reaching his arms beneath your thighs to pull you closer.
“ji…” the way you moan his name is obscene. he wants to hear it again.
“cum on my tongue.” it’s somewhere between a command and a plea. however he asks, he needs to see it again, feel it again–fuck, he needs to taste it again. “cum on my tongue and you can have my dick, baby. ‘s all yours.”
it’s not lost on him that you’re close when your hands reach for his hair, tugging in a way that makes his eyes roll to the back of his head. he knows before you do, and he’s doing all he can to make you tip over the edge.
“please–”
the fire he coaxes within you builds and builds. until you’re warm to the touch and can’t speak anything but his name in broken moans. he holds you down when you cum, your hips fighting against his strength as his fingers fuck you through it.
“good girl… that’s my good girl…” he praises. his eyes are glued to your face, taking in every frame of you as you come undone on his fingers. once your breathing calms, and you lie still on the bed, his eyes trail down to your pussy. his fingers gather the wetness of your cunt and pull out in tandem with your whine of “too much!”
“look at you, baby…” he coos as he stands. “that’s my good girl, cumming on my tongue so pretty for me.” his clean hand trails up your body, and rests against your throat. his hand is warm, almost weightless as it rests above your throat. it’s oddly grounding for you.
“made such a mess, though…” an idea pops into his head. “you ever taste yourself, baby?” you shake your head no. jisung brings two fingers up to your lips. “go ahead.” he brushes the slick pads of his fingers against your bottom lip.
“clean up the mess you made.”
jisung groans as you take his fingers into your mouth. He can’t recall seeing a sweeter sight in his life. the way you look up at him, eyes wide and glossy as his fingers hit the back of your throat. you don’t stop though. you keep sucking, even beginning to bob your head a little and it goes straight to his dick.
he’s enjoying this too much.
jisung slides his fingers out of your mouth, and runs the same hand through his hair. “feel good?” he takes note of the look on your face, so fucked out already. you nod. it’s not a good enough response for him. “talk to me.” he’s gentle as he speaks, and brushes your hair out of your face.
“feels good, ji.” you sigh, and shut your eyes.
“yeah?”
“yeah.”
“want more? or are you done for the night?” jisung’s thumb caresses your cheek, the other hand sits softly at your waist.
“more, please?”
“of course, baby. you did so good for me. i promised you i’d give you my cock, didn’t i? gotta give my pretty girl what she wants.” it makes him impatient, to know that he has you prepped and eager for him. but he has to start slowly.
he pushes his sweats down beneath his thighs, too impatient to fully take them off. he fists his heavy cock in his hands as the tip prods at your entrance.
“gonna put it in now, okay?” he doesn't give you much time to think about it and before you can reply, he's pushing in.
“jisung…” your eyes shut as you moan his name, and jisung watches the way your pussy welcomes him. you watch jisung: the hungry look in his eyes, the messiness of his hair, the way he breathes deep and slow as he takes you. half his cock is nestled inside you when he finally breaks the silence.
“you're doing so good, baby…” he mutters, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “taking me so well…”
it's then that he starts to thrust. calculated and slow strokes that have you gasping as clenching around him. jisung is captivated. his eyes are glued onto the way you suck him in. he's barely able to keep himself from fucking into you deeper.
your eyes wander down from taking in jisung's expressions, to the way his hips fuck into you with all the restraint he has. it makes you want more, want to feel him completely.
“more,” it's not an ask or a plea. it's a demand. you keen into his touch, and your eyes lock. “i want it all.”
jisung laughs. he can't help it, you're cute. “more, baby? you want all my cock?” he teases and slowly begins to pull out.
“yes!” you whine, “jisung, please?”
it's cute. you're so desperate for him. it's hypocritical almost. he's using all his self control trying not to fuck you like he's a fucking rabbit in heat.
without any warning, he's grabbing your hips and pulling you closer. he slides into you, slowly. he groans as he bottoms out. you reach out to grip the sheets, but he's quick to grasp your hand instead.
“good job, baby. fuck, pussy's made for me–hold my hand, pretty girl…”
jisung pulls back and he swears he sees stars. “fuck…” he doesn't know how much longer he can control himself. his thrusts are deep and slow, falling into the familiar routine he fucked you with earlier.
it's not enough for you. not enough pleasure to satiate the fire hes stoking inside of you. “more.” you demand. “more, ji.” something snaps in him. he’s quick to fulfill your request, fucking into you faster.
“so dirty, baby. never been fucked before and already can’t get enough.” you can’t deny his words, or respond. all you do is moan his name again and arch into his touch.
“close?” you mutter, almost unsure of when your own orgasm is coming. with that, jisung spreads your pussy open with his fingers, and spits right on your clit. the high pitched whine that leaves your lips makes him smirk.
“i know, baby.” his fingers work fast circles against your clit, and he feels the way you tense and squirm against his touch. “too much!” and it’s not. jisung knows it’s not. it’s just enough.
“cum for me, baby.” and you do: with little whines and moans of his name, with little rolls of your hips to chase the pleasure he’s giving you. you’re clenching around him like a vice, each flutter of your pussy brings him closer to cumming, and he’s already trying his best to hold off.
he can’t take it anymore. jisung pulls out quickly and fists himself as he cums on your tummy. “that’s my girl… did so well.” he praises, his free hand soothing over your hip.
jisung watches as you come down from your high. you're so pretty. his pretty girl. all ruined. your hair's a mess. the thin sheen of sweat on your forehead. his cum all over your tummy.
“how are you feeling, baby?” he asks with a soft smile on his face.
“good,” you nod, a barely there smile on your face as you reach for his hand. “more than good.”
you tug his hand, trying to pull him down to cuddle you. it's a signal that jisung responds to immediately. he's pulling you to the side to spoon you.
one hand rests against your tummy, and he rests your head against his other arm. he kisses your nape, then your shoulder, then rests his head against you. it’s peaceful.
“i love you, jisung.”
“i love you, baby.”
© dollracha do not copy reupload or repost.
#dollracha#han smut#jisung smut#han jisung smut#skz smut#stray kids smut#stray kids x reader#skz x reader#stray kids x reader smut#skz x reader smut#han x reader#han jisung x reader#han x reader smut#han jisung x reader smut
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𝐊𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐁𝐚𝐤𝐮 𝐱 𝐅!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐇𝐂'𝐬
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐇𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
• definitely made them match cute hello kitty pj's, though Eijiro n you loved it way more than Katsuki did for sure 😭 (deep down he does it bc he loves you both I fear) (he wears those hk pj's almost every night but no one knows this).
• don't ever try and talk down to yourself bc they will be all up on you!! And they will scold you for thinking and saying such things about yourself.
• Especially if you have an 'unacceptable' body type, they are soo all over you. Don't let them hear someone saying anything remotely bad about you or they will lose their shit.
• Kirishima def brings both you and Kats a snack or drink from the venting machine whenever he gets himself something.
• bro, if you're wearing something more revealing or showing more skin, they're dead and feral😩 (especially if you don't show skin a lot or rarely wear revealing clothing.)
• anyone you hate or don't like? Omfg same! They don't either! (If u do they do too).
• will not hesitate to beat your ass when training together. They're both hard on you because they want you to fight and use your quirk to your full potential, though, Eijiro is slightly more careful since he doesn't wanna badly cut you with his hardening. Katsuki is extremely caring tho if he does end up going too far with you or Eijiro.
• they're so loveable. Eijiro is always trying to hold hands with Katsuki and you, even if it's just pinkies. wants to wear y'all's clothes, gives y'all matching bracelets, those things.
• Katsuki though just complains but does do wtvr you ask him too! Def big on acts of service and making sure y'all are not overdoing or overworking yourself, eating enough, resting enough, etc. Although, he lovess loves when Eijiro or you give him head scratches, only in private tho! (He won't fight it if he's tired).
• you're cold? Don't worryyyy they've gotchu! You will be wearing both of their jackets/coats at the same time, AND wearing an extra pair of gloves Katsuki brought (if you're outside, Winter time..) Now you're overheated!
• even if they aren't interested, they'll still watch whatever you put on to watch on yt. They don't know who tf Jaykubscoutz is but hey he's kinda funny..
• if you're too full to finish the rest of your food or wtvr you're eating, or don't like it, give it to one of them and they'll eat it for you.
• if you wear makeup, they love watching you put it on and get ready. Eijiro is the only enthusiastic one if you suggest putting makeup on them. Katsuki won't let you go anywhere near his eyes.
• you're sick? Oh no! That's okay😊 you've got Eijiro comforting you, cuddling and giving you head pats while Katsuki makes you soup and gives you medicine; water, crackers, the good stuff. You get better within 2 days thanks to them!
• if you're on you're period they don't want you doing too much tbh. They know you have to go to your classes, train and stuff but if they can help it they'll get you your food instead or bring it to you. Just ask and you'll get it! They just want to make your period easier for you. They're very understanding.
• youve painted their nails a few times, and Eijiro loves black or red (sometimes both) in him while Katsuki...let's just say he'll only wear black, orange too if you beg him or bribe him enough.
#sssugarplum stories#bnha headcanons#bnha fluff#bnha x reader#bnha x reader headcanons#eijiro kirishima x reader#mha fluff#mha x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader#denki kaminari x reader#hanta sero x reader#kiribaku x reader#poly!kiribaku x reader#eijiro kirishima fluff#katsuki bakugo x female reader#katsuki bakugo x y/n#bnha eijiro kirishima#bnha drabble#bnha imagines#kirishima eijiro x reader#kirishima eijiro x y/n#bakugou x reader#bakugo katuski x reader#mha drabbles#mha headcanons#mha x y/n#my hero academia#bnha#bnha x chubby reader#bnha x you
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CBS Ghosts is my new guilty pleasure so take my new OCs. The Blanchet family were distant French cousins of the Woodstones who visited the house in the early 1900s, only for a violent house robbery to take the life of their youngest daughter, Mercedes, and her loyal self appointed guard dog, Horse. Only 8 years old, it takes some time for Mercedes to understand her fate, and for some time she’d be very distressed that her family seem to be ignoring her. On the bright side, the other ghosts are there to try and make things easier, though the misfit collective have a hard time caring for a child given their circumstances, and conflicting ideas on how best to raise a little girl.
Of all the ghosts, she is closest with Thorfinn. He has a soft spot for the little girl.
#‘why does her dog have an English name’ because he didn’t have one at first he was just dog. and then they died#and thorfinn who had watched this dog take a bullet in attempt to save his owner#took one look at this thing and went “’AHA! Dog strong like horse!’ and that became his name#he’s also a Great Dane#I chose these names for comedic effect due to all the confusion they could cause#Hetty: oh here comes the horse drawn carriage#Mercedes: horse cannot draw a carriage! he does not know how to hold a pen :(#also as the years go by people mistake Mercedes for a car lmao#and bc horse is a Great Dane she continuously mistakes Thor’s anti-dane rants to be about her dog#art#my art#digital art#fanart#doodle#drawing#cbs ghosts#ghosts#thorfinn#thorfinn ghosts#ghosts thorfinn#ghosts oc#cbs ghosts oc#she could also work for bbc ghosts but I haven’t finished that show yet#and honestly it’s not reaaaallyyy my sense of humour#there’s a lot I like more than cbs don’t get me wrong but in general I find shows where the humour comes from watching everything fall apar#more stressful than entertaining#but I still wanna finish it bc there’s a lot I like#anyways imagine cbs ghosts but in every other scene thorfinn has a child on his hip#oh also Pete becomes very attached to her once he shows up bc dad#OH AND she doesn’t speak much English at first but by the time sam and jay show up she’s actually pretty fluent
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Zelda goes mushroom girl
#tloz#a link to the past#zelda#link#my art#I was happy with that first one but for some reason decided it still needed a companion piece so I spent way too long on that second one...#I don't think there was any time during the progress where I was happy with it but hfduhdfu at least I got to Attempt drawing moss hell yea#I also at some point sat in Pyu's art stream and said I enjoy drawing legs As I was being murdered by the infamously impossibe (imo) squat.#it's ok I had fun !! but I need to learn how to let doodles be doodles or I'll never finish stuff at this rate dfsuhfd#if everything in my tloz tag looks like it was drawn by different people uuuh 2023 was art crisis year ngl......#I'm falling back into my old ways rn though#anyway I think about these two a lot I think they're both stone faced and awkward ppl in different ways but they try rly hard to be friends#like I like to think it starts out so incredibly awkward and a bit sad bc they keep stepping over each other's toes accidentally the harder#they try but idk they find comfy middle ground idk in my brain they have a very interesting friendship I wanna get around to drawing it#in a proper way that might make sense....#if I don't write 200 tags I will die maybe it's bc I grew up on dA or smth#and yes I know how to find 1 (one) type of mushroom /I/ am not mushroom girl unfortunately smh
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so i'm leaning toward briala-celene [ugh] or public truce*. but i wanted to know ...
*I've been reading posts/articles that state that public truce isn't best long run ... but it isn't like the inquisitor would KNOW that.
#dai spoilers#for my mooties that wanna play but havent yet#dragon age#grapecase plays dai#wicked eyes and wicked hearts#aka wicked headache and wicked annoyance#grapecase polls#dai poll#grapecase complains#lmao#i feel these posts dont give briala enough credit#unless im missing something#idk that working with gaspard would long run [or even short term] be better for her and the elves than working for/with celene#[i feel it would be with but a lot of people seem to believe it will be for]#yes celene is dismissive when you show her the [REDACTED] but she KEPT it#the dismissiveness matters sure - bc the type of masks matter - but the fact that she secured it matters as much if not more#and what celene did was heinous but let's not act like gaspard wouldnt be as bad if not worse#i feel briala would be smart with both [but with celene i feel she wouldnt let sentimentaility get her as much as people think she would]#and off chance she did - doubting it - her people would be smarter. i feel they'd be on higher alert with celene#now it is a matter of what power they could milk#and okay i do think immediately she could probably twist gaspard's arms harder bc of the blackmail and celene is still worried of coming of#too soft maybe?#but i think celene is smarter - or should be at keepiing balances. like she owes briala more than a debt. and i can see briala carefully mi#king that. i can see both of them slowly building things right under the nobles noses#idk maybe im being idealistic#i do think celene would try and do better in general and for the elves alone#but idk i nee dto finish to play and see#im mostly measuring this off vibes
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And thus, with the passing of 24 hours, Caeru's ambition truly comes to an end. Major Nemesis spoilers below the cut- we're talking endgame ambition business here. Mostly on a character RP front.
The Doomed Scientist made quite a few... choice decisions, in the end. Killing Cups once and for all, recording his story as one of grief-
And sparing what little remained of Mr Mirrors, leaving it free to roam Parabola as it sees fit.
Some of them, he can explain. Others, he's still left to feel... discontent.
Cups needed to die. That much was certain from the start. It was a tyrant, as all Masters are, and complicit in the bargaining and eventual destruction of four (potentially five) cities, as all Masters are. It was an obstacle. A murderer. A petty monster that felt no remorse even on its deathbed, and it went out of its way to ruin multiple lives just because it felt owed its own sick and twisted idea of revenge.
It killed his first love. It looked him in the eyes and he knew what it had done and he knew from the start it was going to die.
Perhaps, in the end, it knew too. And yet it still pleaded, and wanted to live, and-
It made a bargain.
A bargain Caeru didn't take.
Not because he didn't want to. Gods, he wanted to. He wanted it. He wanted it more than anything else in the world. To have Greylu back, to give him the gift of life, of love, to show him the wonders of the Neath and the beauty of the correspondence and all of the people Caeru has met and loved and found home with along the way-
But. He couldn't.
Because Cups was a monster. And no matter what, it deserved to die. And he could not, in good conscience, allow it to live.
Even if sparing it meant everything he's ever wanted.
So he's left here, now. With a bloodied traveling coat, and a bloodsoaked knife, and a favor finally fulfilled.
And nothing to live for. No resurrected lover, no charming visits to Helicon, no slow dances in the living room, no memories to rebuild and lives to live and he won't live again-
Nothing. All he has is a coat born of obligation, not to his love, but to people he's never even met. To lives he's never even touched. To a paramour, still alive, with hair of rose-pink, who doesn't even remember her own brother's existence.
Cups didn't die for Caeru's sake. Cups died for the sake of all who wanted it dead. For the revenger's court, and the ghost screaming in his ear, and the reckoning that will not be postponed indefinitely.
And Caeru, who acted as a tool to carry out their wills? Who all but betrayed his own lover, just to satisfy a cause he never knew existed?
All Caeru is left with, is regret. Regret-
-And grief.
#yin-thoughts#fallen london#fallen london spoilers#nemesis spoilers#so! nemesis huh!#i have. a lot of thoughts#overall i think heart's desire remains closest to my heart#but that's almost certainly bc of the obvious ''you always remember your first'' bias#there's a lot of problems with nemesis that have been talked to death by other people way more eloquently than i could ever express#(the big notable stopgates littered throughout. the weird pacing at the end. the fact you never meet your actual nemesis til the finale)#but overall i still liked it a lot!! i loved it actually!!! it singlehandedly made me like cups as a master!!!!#not because of anything nemesis actually DID mind you. i just really liked making up things about it#in place of nemesis. actually featuring it.#which could either be a plus or a minus against the ambition depending on what angle you look at it from#but. yeah. i'd say i enjoyed it. i enjoyed it a whole bunch#and now that ive played 2 out of the 4 ambitions and my FL hyperfixation evidently isnt letting up#it's safe to say we're all here for the long haul#tune in (insert miscellaneous time in the future) for when i finally after like a year and a quarter#get to find out what the fuck truly goes down in light fingers#and also keep an eye out for that caeru-centric fic ive been unsubtly alluding to and still need to write.#ive got a whole outline for it and it's. well#you'll all see when (if?) i finish it#i have some ideas abt how i wanna play around with the nemesis endings + what they mean to caeru#(and i do mean endings as in both of them)#and it all may seem. insane. when we get there#but i swear i have a direction plotted in my head#i swear#scoundrelventures#<- the scoundrel isnt mentioned At All in this post but that works as a general FL oc lore tag
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Okay you're making me obsessed with Sabosan- I'm in need to posts about them
Just an AU where they meet during childhood, like, Sabo and his parents go to Germa bc of some politic shit and he don't want to be there so he just walks around.
And be accident he finds Sanji outside the castle, crying, and he knows he is one of the princes since they were already presented to each other. But the boy is hurt and crying so much that Sabo can't not help him.
In the beggining Sanji is scared, but soon he notices the other blonde don't want to beat him like his brothers. They talk all the day and for the first time in Sanji's life, he feels like he made a friend.
When Sabo's family has to go back to Goa, both kids are sad but hope to meet again soon. After this, everything in Sanji's past happens (Sora's death, he being locked and running away).
Month's later, the nobles from Goa go again to Germa and Sabor receive the terrible news that Sanji is dead. This broke's his heart 'cause the boy was sweet and kind and even just being with each other during one day he was sure the prince was amazing.
Since Sanji were 8 and Sabo 9 during this, ge just meet Luffy one year later and all he can think sometimes is how much the two would love each other. But don't matter now, his friend is dead.
Everything happens, and years later he remember everything and all he can think is how he forget them? How he let other person he loves die? The boy is broke bc he lose another person.
And he is going to meet Luffy's crew, hearing his young brother talk about them when he says about a guy named Sanji and- Sabor freezes, he ask about him and this boy is identical to his dead friend- but can't be him, right...? He can't have hope.
When they arrive in the ship, he's knowing everyone and then he go to the kitchen with Luffy to meet said boy and- it's Sanji, alive. Breathing, older and so much beautiful.
And Sanji is looking at him too and- both are in shock. Luffy is there, confused and looking at the two. "Luffy, can I talk for a moment with your friend?" Sabo asks intenting to not show how he is emotional.
"Uh? You know each other?" Luffy ask but go outside the kitchen anyway, they still are silent during some minutes. Sanji is read to say something when Sabo hugs him.
"I thought you were dead" is all he says and the blackleg hugs him back, feeling bad for making Sabo think this.
Both don't say much, but they are happy they're together again.
Agh, you all know I am extremely weak for childhood AUs!!!!! This is beautiful :(
I can't stop thinking about Sanji obviously getting forced to meet Sabo, but he doesn't really want to because he always hates it when important people come over. Yes, his father is more distracted with them, but that leaves them a free day from training, and sometimes those are even worse than regular days. Because even if his brothers already make fun of him and beat him up when they train, whenever they're not doing anything it's even worse because they take their time and it's a complete nightmare. Besides, introducing himself with the name Vinsmoke has always made him want to throw up, even from a very early age, and there's this uneasy feeling inside of him whenever Judge speaks about him normally instead of saying how much of a disappointment he is. He prefers that rather than him lying to strangers because he knows what he says isn't true. He doesn't consider him his son, and he doesn't see him as his father either. It's nauseating.
When Sabo and Sanji get introduced along with the other Vinsmoke siblings, Sanji doesn't want to look up. He has to, of course, but he doesn't feel like being there at all. But he's even more scared of what might happen if he doesn't do what Judge says. When he looks up, he can tell that the kid in front of him doesn't want to be here either. He's good at pretending, though. He smiles politely and shakes their hands and it's obvious that he's been trained to act that way, but he doesn't look at all like a noble. He has a missing tooth and scratches in his hands and face and it's quite obvious that he tries to cover it (not him, his parents) but it isn't working for Sanji. Besides, there's this rage in his eyes that Sanji can't quite place but he knows something is going on with him. That just scares him even more, because, even if it's not the same rage his brothers have in their eyes, it's still rage. If he was a simple kid like all the others that have come to their kingdom with their families, Sanji would not be that worried, but he isn't. And Sanji fears the worst because he can't figure him out.
On the other hand, Sabo wants to jump off a bridge. He would rather drown than be here. Get the kid out of there!!!!!!!! He didn't want to come at all but his parents wouldn't stop pressuring him and tbh it was easier to end this quickly so he could go home even quicker (home being Gray Terminal and next to Ace, thank you very much). So he's on his best behavior so he can just quickly go back home. He hates them. The kids, he means. Rich, spoiled brats that are modified to be that way. To be selfish. To kill. It's disgusting and he despises how the father talks with so much pride about it. But- But he never, not even once, mentions the blond. He talks praise about all of his kids except him, but he also doesn't even mention him. Sabo can tell his name is Sanji because his brothers won't stop teasing him about stuff Sabo can't understand, but he knows enough to get that something's off. Whatever. Not his fight. Not his siblings. Not his responsibility.
But his sense of responsibility and morals are already strong enough to make him overly sensitive to this stuff, so he watches the behavior of the kids carefully. Their parents tell them to go do whatever because they're talking about "grown-up stuff" and they need to form "royal bonds for future needs" or whatever bullshit they keep making up. And, uh, Sabo fucking hates it. The kids are scary as fuck. Like, creepy. Type of thing he wishes Ace were with him for because this is way worse than the things they've seen happening at Gray Terminal. The way they speak about the staff and human lives is just disgusting. With no emotion in their voices other than plain selfishness and cruelty. They show Sabo around the castle and- And Sanji isn't around anywhere? Apparently? When he asks where he might be, that's when his brothers start trash-talking him. Calling him a coward. A weakling. Worse things Sabo does not want to repeat but- But it's just extremely fucked up. But again, not his fight. He can keep an eye on them but not intervene because he really, really wants to go home soon. And he's pretty sure this is just the way siblings talk about each other. Rich, noble siblings, at least. Even if Sanji seemed different, he's still one of them.
Sabo eventually gets bored of them, and also they're disgusting to be around. So he just disappears and hopes they don't give a fuck about him to look for him. That's when he finds Sanji crying outside of the castle. He really knows he shouldn't intervene. He never does when he goes to these meetings. But Sanji seems different. He's crying. These kids, in theory, should not be able to feel like this, right? There's just something so human about him, from the first second they saw each other, that Sabo can't help but want to protect him. He's not much older than him, but still. Sanji looks way weaker and shorter in comparison, and,, And in need of someone. Like he's always asking for help.
And so they talk. Sabo approaches him and the first thing Sanji does is flinching. He thinks Sabo is going to hit him, apparently? What the fuck. Sabo instantly kneels beside him to tell him that he is definitely not here for this, and why the hell would he even think that?? Sanji doesn't reply, of course, he just hugs his knees closer to his chest and looks away, hoping for Sabo to not ask more questions. But Sabo notices this glint of hope in his eyes that he doesn't want to show. Like begging for him to get him out of there. Sabo just sits beside him in a very nonchalant and very not noble way and starts talking. He tells Sanji how he doesn't want to be here either, and trash-talks his family and nobility and starts saying all of these things he only tells Ace about. He usually doesn't trust people so easily, and Ace would kill him for this, but Sanji needs this. And apparently, it doesn't bother him at all to give him this. Sanji starts opening up little by little, hope in his eyes and excitement starting to come out of his voice when they change subjects. Sanji, apparently, isn't like his siblings. In any way. And he likes cooking and sea creatures too! Sabo has a lot of stories to tell about those! And they keep talking and talking and hours pass and suddenly Sabo doesn't want to go home. It's not only fun to be here, but scary to leave if it means never seeing Sanji again and leaving him here. Especially when he tells him about everything his family does to him (because they end up talking about that) and he has to hold Sabo back from yelling because he has never been angrier in his entire fucking life. What the hell does this family think they are? Sanji doesn't deserve this. He's nice. Cute, too. Smart. Extremely sweet and empathetic. Selfless. Kindness itself.
But time moves quickly and they have to return to their ship. He hates leaving Sanji. He really does. But they promise to see each other again! He even gives Sanji his white handkerchief. The one he likes. The one that's all ripped and worn out. Because it's the one he uses the most. The one he uses when he's with Ace! And it has his initials engraved there, but the S is the only thing that can be seen, so it's okay! Sanji keeps it like a reminder of freedom and the fact that they'll for sure see each other again!
But they don't.
Because the news of Sanji dying reach Sabo and he's devastated. It's so unfair. And it's true. He knows he's dead and he can't do anything about it. But he also knows his family had something to do with it because he's not stupid. He has to move on past the rage, though, even if it's extremely infuriating and frustrating. He has to move on. Sanji, on the other hand, doesn't let go of the handkerchief and Sabo's words, even if he has lost all hope. Yadda, yadda, yadda, you know how the story goes. So Reiju helps Sanji escape and he knows he'll probably never see him again, but he still hopes. Sabo thinks, meanwhile, when he meets Luffy, that he'd love Sanji. With how much he keeps talking about food and dreams! And Sanji would love being here too. Well, not really, because Gray Terminal doesn't seem at all like something Sanji would enjoy, but it for sure would be better than Germa. And Sabo would be able to protect him too. It doesn't matter now, though.
Time-skip moment. Sabo remembers his childhood and his brothers and Sanji. And Ace just died. So great. It seems that the world is always against him. He doesn't have much time to think about Sanji because right now the only thing he has in mind is Ace, his fruit, and finding Luffy. But Sanji's image, for some reason, keeps appearing in his mind. He isn't sure why, but it's still engraved there. He tries to forget him, but now that he truly wants to forget, he doesn't. Fuck it. Well. Dressrosa happens. Yay! He got a brother back and Ace's fruit. Yadda yadda. We know how it goes.
He doesn't actually get to meet Sanji in Dressrosa because I'm trying to be loyal to the timeline, so let's say that this is post-wano and pre-egghead (and Sabo is fine and he isn't in the huge mess he's in right now). Sabo goes "oh, I want to pay an actual visit to my brother's crew. I didn't get to meet everyone properly" and that's when the cool stuff happens.
You know, he tells Robin first about it and she informs the crew and stuff. When Sabo gets there, the only one on deck is Luffy, so of course he gets all excited and jumps to hug him and keeps talking about his crew and how much he's gonna love everyone! Like Nami because she's super smart like him!!! And Usopp because he has the coolest inventions!! And Sanji because he is the best cook-
Wait, Sanji?
And it can't be, because his Sanji is dead. His Sanji can't be Luffy's Sanji, right? Impossible. He guesses it might be just a coincidence and tries to move on from Luffy's words. But then he starts meeting everyone and Sanji gets out of the kitchen to greet him and- Oh. Okay. Yeah. That's definitely him. He has not forgotten those eyebrows and blue eyes and bangs. He could tell it's him from a mile away. Sabo thinks it's his memory playing with him, but then he remembers Sanji's sudden death without any explanation and blames his young self for not realizing sooner what truly happened. What's funny is that Sanji had the same reaction, because when Luffy talks about Sabo for the first time, he freezes at the name. But he guesses it can't really be him, and Luffy doesn't talk enough about him for Sanji to make the correlation.
But no, yeah, it's definitely him.
As you said, they both freeze. And it's actually kind of weird because everybody is looking at them, but they're only focusing on each other so it's also extremely romantic. Sabo tries to act calm and collected when he asks Luffy if he can speak to Sanji in private, and Luffy instantly says:
Luffy: It's to ask for extra food, right?! I am not going to steal yours like when we were kids! I don't do that anymore! Usopp: He still does that. Luffy: But Sabo can have whatever he wants! Sanji will make it! But not more than me. I'm sure you're gonna do it just to piss me of- Sabo: Luffy, you can have all of my food if you want to. Just let me talk to him for a second. Luffy: ?? But why?! It's been so long. I want to be with you! Sabo: Because- Sanji: If you let us talk in private I'll give you two desserts. And more meat. We'll have whatever you want tonight. Luffy: OH! AWESOME! Nami: What is this about again? Franky: Yeah... It looks like you two know each other. Sanji: Who says we don't? Luffy: YOU TWO KNOW EACH OTHER? Sabo: No. Not- Luffy. Give us a moment. *They go into the kitchen together* Zoro: First he's a prince and now he's fucking Luffy's brother. Are we sure Curly doesn't have anything else to tell us? Luffy: He's not- Nami: Shut up!! I can't listen to their conversation through the door if you keep talking!
(She doesn't hear them at all, actually, because the others keep talking and Sabo and Sanji are pretty quiet and she gets bored of trying to spy on them).
They don't really know what to do except to stare at each other. Sanji is about to make some joke or something to make things lighter, but Sabo goes and instantly hugs him tight. Sanji feels he's about to start crying. Especially when Sabo says "I thought you were dead" / "Well, I am not" / "I can see that" / "I- I'm sorry. I truly hoped we could meet but- Things have been a little- Fuck. Just. I'm sorry. Judge- My-" / "Yes. I know. I mean. I don't know, but it's obvious you don't want to talk about it now and I know it's your shitty father's fault. Don't worry about it" / "... Alright" / "Is it weird if I don't want to let go of you?" / "Shut up. You're the one making it weird" / "You grew up. Quite a lot. Remembered you so tiny and cute" / "Oh, fuck you, I am not-" / "Still cute, though" / "You were nicer to me back then" / "You were less sarcastic" / "Touche" / "Hey! So you finally got to be a cook! And for the future king of the pirates! How does that feel?" / "Tiring. Exhausting. Frustrating... A dream come true" / "....... You look happier" / "I am.... Hey? Can you keep like- Holding me for a while? Because-" / "It's okay. Yes. If I let go of you I might start sobbing. This is fine. As long as we don't move, we're fine" / "Great". (Also have in mind that this is post-wano so Sanji is extremely sensitive and wants to kind of sort of die. This is probably the best thing that has happened to him lately. Or ever)
And this is getting reaaaally long already so to end this just say that they definitely end up kissing at some point and dating and then uh, things™ happen. But just think about them having a happy ending. I- I want to write a fanfic now. You can't do that to me. Ughhh. What if I did- What if I did write this fic- Thinking thoughts.
#they're my absolute beloveds#they make me go insane yes#aaaaaaa i love them so much i am so sorry this is long kjwefkbfkjeb#i got a bit carried away and i still have more ideas#like sanji telling him he still has the handkerchief like wtf gay people#also sanji cooking for him i am gonna die#and them staring at each other during dinner#and then seeing each other at night while everybody is asleep because sabo stays for a while and#and look can i write this please this was such a good idea and i need it right now in my veins#i know i say this a lot but this time i want to finish this#IF YOU WANNA WRITE IT THO YOU CAN DO IT IT WAS YOUR IDEA AFTER ALL BESTIE#but if you do tag me bc i am in desperate need of sabosan#one piece#black leg sanji#revolutionary sabo#strawhat pirates#sabosan#sabo x sanji
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Tally still isn't quite back to 100% yet, but she's recovered a lot in general. Every time she does one of her normal habits that she'd stopped doing while she was sick, my heart just squeezes with gratefulness. Stuff like her yowling like I died after I go to bed, her climbing onto my lap while I'm sitting on the toilet and/or watching me from on top of her litter box, her jumping onto furniture, her getting up in my face and sniffing my breath as I slowly blow air at her, her trying to eat the plants, her PLAYING.... and of course, her eating.
I also discovered the coat rack toppled over onto the couch after getting out of bed today - surely her doing. Didn't break anything so im just glad she's back to being at least some semblance of a chaos demon, even if she's not totally recovered yet.
It's the little things, sometimes. All her little habits, some harmless and some annoying, that make up who she is and her presence in my life. When all of these stop, so she's just a lump on the couch, barely eating and barely getting up... it was unsettling. And worrisome.
But I've got my baby back. She's still not super high energy, but she's got enough to feel like herself again. And I'm so, so grateful.
#speculation nation#i had a vet appointment scheduled for yesterday for blood work if she still wasnt better by then#and on monday when they called to confirm the appointment she was still really lethargic. only starting to act better.#so i didnt wanna cancel it yet. but on tuesday and wednesday she was acting a Lot better. actually mostly finishing her dry food!!#and returning to a lot of her old habits. i was really glad.#of course since it was new years eve and new years day i couldnt call the vet to cancel the appointment on the 2nd. bc the office was closed#but thankfully when i called earlier in the day yesterday they were completely fine canceling the appointment day-of#a lot of places dont let u do that so it was a relief bfmsbfm#so im watching her to make sure she doesnt get worse again. but i think she'll be fine.#i feel like it likely Was the same thing that june had. but a different manifestation. and more worrying.#bc june was just sneezing for like a week ish. i felt rly bad for her but she was still eating fine.#and she was up and playing and such. but when tally got sick... it was like she was a whole different cat.#i never want to see tally so stiff and lethargic and refusing to eat food like that again.#i know theres a good chance i will. eventually. but i hope it's not for a good long while. at least a decade.#my baby's normally the picture of health so it just feels so wrong...#and ultimately. i think the trip to the vet to get their vaccines is what caused this. the stress lowering their immune systems#and potentially smth they picked up while they were there. idk.#it was still important to get them their updated vaccines. but God i could've done without the reactions and sicknessss hfkshfnd
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I hadn't even realized just how much I drew them this year before I put this together 😳
anyway nobody asked but here's (almost) every jeanpiku art I made in 2024 🥹🫶🏼
this was a big year for me in terms of developing my art style 🥺I was also finally able to update OOML after 2 years! overall I'm just really happy with my creative journey this last year 😭
thanks to everyone who's stuck around and supported my stuff 🥹 here's to more creative pursuits in 2025! 🫶🏼
#I'm ngl 2024 wasn't easy#but looking back there's still a lot of good that's come out of it#and I'm happy I was able to draw as much as I did#this year I think I wanna focus on my writing a little more#maybe finally finish OOML too 😭#been thinking about going back to trad too bc I feel like I've been too reliant on references in 2024 :/#I need more practice#but anyway we'll see!!#not me rambling in the tags#jeanpiku
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letting myself unmask has been so nice at times because i'm seeing my boyfriend express joy much more readily too. who knew me being expressive and all that would do so much good!!!
#today was touch and go but overall much better than yesterday where i was watching a musical (not my thing) and it was legally blonde (cool)#but everyone's voices were so shrill (ouch) and the audience was clapping (ouch) and talking a lot (ouch)#and i was three rows back from the stage so the lights were bright (ouch) and there were strobe lights (ouch) and the person seated next to#me kept touching me when she turned to talk to the person next to her..... AND my joints were killing me but we had to walk everywhere from#the theatre to the restaurant we ate at for dinner. which was a byob. and i didn't know we were going to a byob or i would've b'd my own b#but my bf's family doesn't drink so it would've been awkward anyway. and no one talks to me and i don't talk to anyone but yet i'm expected#to be there for some reason (??) i'd rather stay home honestly. horrible time. i couldn't even vape because of said family#so i had zero pain or anxiety relief that whole time. and i had the longest meltdown in the theatre. and i couldn't finish bc intermission#so i had to just like. force it down so i could sit there in silence for 15 minutes while everyone else talked to each other.#and then after all that we still had a 40 minute car ride back home. with my bf's mom.#and then today she invited us to the park with her and my bf was like 'do you wanna?' and i couldn't say no in front of her so i said yes#and then felt SO anxious because god. i just needed A Day. so then i shut down. but then i communicated what i was needing to my bf#and we had a nice walk at a different park on our own. phew#i do Not mean to complain but goodness. pre-autism i would've blamed myself for everything that happened#but now i can properly commiserate with people who understand me LOL anyway. look at some of the crazy shit i went through yesterday
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also I keep doing the thing where I have an interaction. astarion disapproves. I sigh. I reload the save before the interaction. I kick him back to camp. I do the thing. I pick the lad back up.
#eve lae’zel likes me better than him it’s kinda funny#him and karlach like. she’s a surprisingly tough cookie#I also picked her up? kinda late?#it was a case of I was scared to do stuff on the map#I also didn’t pick up wyll for a hot minute bc I coudlnt find him#I’m better now about looking around + talking to everyone l#I spent like. an hour and half talking to people around last light#I still don’t have halsin#ALSO IM SO SORRY GAMERS#I accidentally killed minthara. so she is uhhhh MIA from my current game#I do want to play w her one of these times#I might have to make a different oc for it tho#I know I could have knocked her out and she would show up ;—;#I was. so anxious about the goblin camp that I kinda jsutjddudjdjdjddj#on the list of things to do now that things in the game are less scary#I ain’t going back anytime soon tho like I wanna finish the game first I think#gosh act 1 is huuuge compared to act 2#I’m waiting for the we fix the problem and turns out there’s a lot worse problems going on#unless act 2 is just truly as short as I’m imagining#but we’ll see! don’t tell me tho I wanna find out obviously#owen plays bg3
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Just some further character pages I did for ocs (Soul eater Fancharas) that belong to my friend @lilliesofinspirationvalley ;;;;
#I'm not really the type to post Ocs here on tumblr bur aay;;;#my art#friends ocs#chalk has friends???#unrealistic#i didnt post the other outfit alts tho bc don't wanna spam pictures;;;#soul eater fancharacters#soul eater fancharacter#soul eater oc#soul eater ocs#please check her rewrites out tho!#she puts a lot of thought into them uu#ocs#oc#fancharacter#fan character#also wether I have pink or green text really just depends on the daily mood btw-#one is in a depressive cycle and the other if I feel like usually-#I don't say which is which uu#still for the love of Knuckles I STILL need your silly billies weapon forms so I can finally finish the rest of your meister Ocs Lilly >:0
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my favorite edits - 2023 edition 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9
#ts4#simblr#once again i don't know how to tag this so...#i'm just gonna use the same tags i used last year ig#2023 was apparently the year of the monster boyz#only 3 of these are not mb posts & i'm ok with that actually#ik i've said it a million times already but#i had soooo much fun doing mb stuff this year!#i'm really excited about all the stuff i have planned for the AU tbh#like. i have a list#i'm hoping................... to get the origin stories done at some point.#probably gonna do some writing here soon ish.#i've gotta make all of the side characters still & finish the character page so idk. i'll figure it out. i have a lot of ideas#i really wanna start sharing more about the story & the boys' actual personalities so that's probably what i'll focus on this next year#edit-wise i mean. like doing lore edits & stuff. idk#making cricket's was really fun so i think i'll like making stuff for everyone else too#i just have to not try to do a whole story bc then i'll lose interest. it'll be like the degenerates all over again lmao#idk why i just hate making story posts#lore posts are fine but story posts? mm no. not for me. idk how but they are different in my brain ok#n e way#i rambled. sorry. bye lol
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19, 30, 39 for the handwriting ask game wahooo !!!
19) AAAAaaa so hard to choose fave songs…! but recently I’ve been listening to Bunny Girl a fair bit, started humming my clematis today so went to listen to that as well…Oh wait fave songs uhh RGU op is lovelyyy! also the song I want to be your lover appears in my mind a lot…wait also song I found on bilibili that does an ouchie to me is (mainly the first part) are you lost AAAAAA if I keep going I am going to fill 10 pages (of these short pages) but uhhhh a doll of lapis and erica’s sorrow and also karen’s cleanup are good! essentially there are too many nice silly songs and I am just really bad at making up my mind >:( (I think I will have links to the YT of these)
30) Thank youuu for sending in a silly ask >_O (It looks a lil goofy but its okay!) I think because of the pens I am using my handwriting looks slightly “nicer(?)” but oh well! I might have to add a transcript because my handwriting is still kinda messy :3 (aaa all my silly written faces are messed up in this page :c)
39) I have an egregious amount of stationary supplies and also really want to go back into sewing a bit! aaa or spending time making those silly friendship bracelets (would be silly to make some based on mutuals colors) Oh and also learning how to sew and embroider enough to make silly cotton dolls :ccc (so many things I wanna do yet so many horrors yet still)
#silly rambles#for i want to be your lover its specifically raon cover but I forgot to write it lol but I still put the cover’s link#also to be fair I used to loop that song a lot a lot so makes sense it would sometimes start playing in my mind#aaaa i didnt even get to mentioning that one cover of carnivorous plant aaaaa#i really like the mao sasagawa cover of carnivorous plant i listened to it a lot (and also it doesn’t have the ringing of the original which#i cant always handle/enjoy)#wait wait woswald is nice tooo aaaaaa#i’ve found a lot of songs on bilibili that aren’t from it#AAAAA like i’m falling in love with my teacher WHICH AAAAA does not need to be as nice as it is#wait also GURU and bereavement#those also bc (idv stuff) bilibili I found and quite like#also on revolutionary girl utena its not just the opening but that was foremost in my mind#oh also in finding the en names for the last two songs I wrote down (I genuinely didn’t know before hand bc I got them va yt recommendation#and had them in a playlist to find them) I realized dongdang covered both of them which is lovely#will be adding those covers into my current playlist#i really hope the links work pls pls pls plssss#also is this indicative of how j-music comprises of most of what I listen to#oh also as much as my brain thinks in silly words I cannot spell/handwrite most of them so I did check to make sure I got some of those corr#correct lololo#AAAA I FINALLY FINISHED THE TRANSCRIPT AAAAAAAA#i’m so eepy I wanna go sleer mode…Zzzz
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I meant to write more for a pt 2 lore post earlier but didn't end up doing so, so pls take these AU sketches(Mark & Jense and then some assorted sketchies)
#i should never have drawn them as catboys bcs now they appear as catboys in mind half the time 😭😭#its only on paper but i drew more catboy sketches of them than whats included here 😭#seb reminds me of my cat where hes being all nice and cuddly and then will bite you out of nowhere#seb in his frilly nightgown is very important to me!!!#i meant to draw both of them in nightgowns but brain wasnt worked too well tonight#so thats why these are mostly half finished#the bottom seb is too remind myself i have a regular art style 😭😭😭#mark in this au is so funny to me. bro is tortured by having to be with seb like practically every waking moment#he basically is a offically provided live-in bestie 😭😭#*based on real life thing. i think its funny how you can be royalty yourself +#but bcs youre not part of the imperial family you can still be reduced to the job of having to dress the emperor 😭#^ so thats mark in this au#seb promoted him to an important role when he became emperor but still makes mark do his old duties 🤭🤭#jense is in charge of all the horses and transport and things. thus: ye olde horse girl#im sorry but in historical AUs all f1 drivers are legally obligated to be horse girls. its literally canon#so sorry for the catboy sketch. it will happen again.#but ig i dont wanna go too deep into lore stuff in these tags cause yeah. another post in the works!!#i think about it and have talked about it a lot. but its hard to like contain all of it to bullet points and such#my brain is not built for writing fic i think so idk of youll ever get that from me. but lore yes i will deliver#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#jenson button#mark webber#f1 fanart#formula 1 fanart#catie.art.#formula 1#boy king au
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i hate when i really like a song sound-wise but when I actually sit down to look at the lyrics, they're just. let's say, clumsy at best. i miss my misheard version...
#seele.txt#u know when a song is trying so hard to be deep but when u actually look at the lyrics#they're just half connected phrases glued together with cheap rhymes#like it's the kind of thing where u can just see them going 'no one is gonna notice right?'#but i know....#(i know bc that's exactly the kinda shit i would do just to finish smth already dhhxkxzkjx)#this is about several cla*ro songs#<- just dont want it to show up in their tags but i still wanna yap#and it's like. i still like the songs. they're melodious. some of the lyrics *are* nice but#a lot of the lyrics are just. trying too hard ig which makes them clunky
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