#but I see so many people so happy that they’re okay physically

[thisgingerhasnosoul]

Let me apologize in advance for being super fucking depressing.

On the one hand, I’m so, so glad that some of the hostages were released. I’m so grateful they’re safe and home. But on the other hand… I also know that those kids who were kidnapped will never be the same again. It will stay with them their entire lives, and they will never fully get over that trauma (I don’t even want to think about the kids still being held). I experienced 1/1000th of what they went through and I am still dealing with the extreme traumatic effect it had on me. So I know—I know—how all of them must be feeling right now. I know how those weeks must have felt as a captive, ripped away and isolated from their security, put into the hands of complete strangers and abusers. And to still see so many apathetic or outright justifying what was done to them… I really don’t have the words to describe how furious I am. How sorrowful I am. I really, really don’t.

Especially because I know that if they hadn’t been Jewish, more people might have cared.

[feistyvirghoe]

•*¨*•.¸¸☆*･ﾟ𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫, 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲’𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮? ﾟ･*☆¸¸.•*¨*•

pick a pile u feel most called to, the one u cannot look away from, the one that is pulsing, go with your gut, always trust yourself, and if u feel called to more that’s cool baby boo! there more for u!

these are general and for a vast amount of ppl, don’t get ur undies all twisted up bc it’s not resonating, it’s normal and it’s fine, this just wasn’t for u! <3

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 1 - i see your future partner will see you as someone who has been through a hell of a lot, whatever u have overcome just makes them look at you as like this strong individual, someone who has suffered a lot probably at the hands of others too. they see you as an extremely fair individual, you don’t back down from a fight or challenge, whatever comes your way you still persevere and continue to move forward, it’s like u have been through so much strife but you’re still positive about life, the circumstances, like you try not to let that get to you, you’re an honest person, they see u as someone who’s fire is still there after all the weird conflicts you’ve gone through, you don’t let it break you down, still standing strong, but even though u may be very assertive and someone who seeks the truth, like a whistleblower, but u look so happy and vibrant on the outside like u kind of deceive people with that soft, warm, joyful exterior but if anyone tries you, they get like instant karma or just karma in general, like you’re not the one to fucking mess with, there is this passion within you that needs to be shown off, like letting yourself be seen.

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 2 - your future person sees you as a bit naive but not in a bad way, there’s this innocence to you guys, you’re very okay like the lovebirds but then there’s sadness and a lot of fucking grief, maybe it’s coming from losing friends, family, lovers, pets, could be anything sentimental and close to your heart but they see u as so gifted and just as someone who doesn’t really break the rules, they see you as someone who may need some compassion in their life, like more support, i mean you’re extremely supported by the divine but u probably don’t feel that way in the 3D, like here physically IRL, do u not have many people that you can count on? like you have to do it all alone which you don’t and i’m sure your person will see this as well. there is so much good out there waiting for you, they’d want to see you and help u move on from whatever has happened that affected you so heavily, almost like u feel like you have no one on your side, but they’re there babe, it’s okay and completely harmless to obey and let yourself change for the better, for your highest good! they don’t want you holding onto this pain, i was very jokey about it earlier so maybe u guys can be the ones to brush it off but no, sitting with what happened and reflecting and not looking backwards at a past that you can’t change may help some. you’re worth so much more than whoever or whatever fucked u over, you deserve to be happy and feel happy and full of positive LOVING ENERGY! i feel like tapping back into spirit and becoming closer with the divine will help..easing the discomfort emotionally, you’re always loved and protected!

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 3- okay my p3s, it took me a minute to feel out your energy, idk i was just getting really frustrated and now im sweaty and i just took a shower, so im feeling like your future lover may see you as a “hothead” no, you just have a temper, it seems like you like things your way, like you’re not the one to let shit slide, you stand up for yourself, something about you is just very fast moving, like go go go go (cue the cringey ass carnival song 💀) okay so yeah you have a temper and can be quick to jump the gun and just fucking move people out of your way. i see they see you as someone who can’t stand when other people are just slow moving, like you need to be stimulated and engaged with whatever you’re doing, like you will keep doing something over and over until you reach your desired outcome. i like yall, u guys don’t play around, and that’s what it is, your fucking feisty ass, my pile that seems to embrace change whether you like it or not, it’s like it is what it is…i hope your person is strong as fuck and not just physically i mean mentally, you’re in your own fucking world, it’s like they may even have to ground you and bring u back down to earth to help u stabilize yourself, let yourself take a break from the fucking overachieving i don’t wanna say it like that but if you keep working yourself hard to the point of no return you’re gonna crash and i feel like u don’t mind bringing others in the mix, it’s like if i go down we all going down lmfao…just breathe, relax, take a minute to go outside and embrace your surroundings even if it’s shitty, there is always something around us that is so small but it puts a smile on your beautiful face. you don’t always have to keep your guards up and yes people may wanna try to come after you but just know you don’t have to do much to fend these weirdos off, they could never really reach ya level. your future lover sees all of this, you stand up for yourself and u show out too, like don’t fucking mess w me is y’all’s vibe, HAHAHAHA FUCK AROUND AND U GON DEF FIND OUT 💀

(this pile took such a turn lmao, it felt so chaotic ahhh, i hope u guys find some time to seriously just CHILL..no worrying about nothing just woosah baby, idk like whatever calms you down do it! rfn haha 😆ugh i wanted to write more but i promised myself to make the piles shorter, but pls lmk if u guys like longer more detailed ones or straight to the point, i mean either way it’s up to me but i wanna hear from you guys 🩵😚)

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 4- you guys are my leaders, even if you don’t see it this is all about ur future lover and how they see you, you seem to have a very strong head on your shoulders, you guys are so fucking courageous and extremely fast moving again similar to pile 3 but not quite, they’re like the energizer bunnies (i’m sorry to pile 3 that’s not a jab lmao) but you guys are more strategic, the other pile is more so spontaneous, okay if u feel called to it just go for it and head to that pile but you guys my lil babies hahaha, u may not like that, the lil cutesy names, but i mean underneath it all is just a sweet ball of sunshine, you guys like control and your future lover will automatically see it, it’s like you guys may not like to see things out of place, no matter what it is, like you need a schedule, you can’t just free ball it, you guys are like methodical and you’re not giving up without a fight, you’ve come so far and for some random ass weirdo to just come on in and try and undermine you is a very wrong chess move, you’re ten steps ahead bitch, i feel like you know more than you let on, like yes you may be cool calm and collected but oh do your words have people either checking themself or they’re in a corner crying from what you said, maybe u can be a little blunt with the way you interact with others, but i don’t think it’s coming from such a bad place, that’s just in your nature, you know how to tame your inner demons, the beast within, u can look at your own mess and take accountability, very honest straightforward, cut throat ass person, and your person is digging that shit, they like your dominance and how assertive you are, like the fucking boss, mommy/daddy/authoritative energy!

THANK U FOR FUCKING BEING HERE U AMAZING ASS QUEEN/KING/GOD/GODDESS !!!!

i appreciate you for stopping by and letting me read for you, i have been gone for some time but im back bitch and im here to fucking stay! idk if anyone else has been feeling this weird ass energy of people like not wanting you to succeed or see you doing well, i’ve been feeling that and a mix of my own pent up shit i need to deal with but i hope you liked this reading and if you don’t that’s literally fine babe, just don’t be an asshole about it, if it doesn’t resonate what??? LET IT GOOOOOO ! i have to say that!

these are extremely general readings and they’re meant for entertainment purposes, please don’t take things so seriously and also realize my readings are for people above 18!

[nvuy]

I saw the Boothill text messages leaks and he physically can not cry. How does this info make u feel 🎤

GIVE ME THAT 🎤

“Theoretical question…” Boothill gratefully takes the glass of wine you hand to him before you sidle up next to him in the grass. “…But say the sun was g’nna blow up tomorrow, and you were the only one that knew about it. What would you do?”

He pulls off his hat and rests it by his feet. He feels you staring at him. Your gaze is warm, yet something about it bothers him. Like you’re trying to read him.

He presses his lips together in a thin line.

“That’s definitely a question,” you murmur beneath your breath. “Why?”

He says nothing for a moment.

The warm breeze is gentle.

He’s still staring at the sunset when he replies, “dunno. ‘M curious.” His words are accompanied by a casual shrug.

He hears you shift, maybe slightly uncomfortable. The wine in your glass sloshes.

He takes a sip from his own glass. It’s not his favourite, but you can’t really afford anything to his tastes. But, for what it’s worth, the wine is nice, and good enough to take his mind off how his metal fingers still seem to tremble when he mentions the end of the world.

Sweet and benign on his tongue, just like you. He hums and studies the drink through the glass. Maybe cheap booze ain’t too shabby.

“I guess I’d spend it with my family,” you say. You, too, shrug.

“Would you tell ‘em?” He turns his head to look at you. “That the world’s endin’?”

He watches as you inhale.

Then, you say, “no.” There’s a light shake of your head to accompany your words. “I don’t want to scare them.”

That’s what he did, too. Many, many years ago.

He remembers seeing red smeared all over her little face. How it slowly turned a deep purple as she held her breath. How it then faded completely with its colour, and he lost sight of her gorgeous pinkish cheeks when she took her final breaths.

“What would ya say to them in the last minute?”

He can’t remember her voice anymore.

That lump in his throat swells, and it feels like a cold marble. He’s so tired of trying to swallow it.

“I think I’d be too busy crying like a baby, but…” It was a lighthearted joke as you nudge him in the side. He only lets out a humourless puff of air through his nose. “I’d tell them I love them. That they’re the best people I’ve ever known.”

Something heavy weighs in his chest like hot iron, burning and bubbling at the base of his throat. “Yeah. I get it.”

You touch his cheek gently. “You okay?”

He’s not. “‘M fine.”

“Would you stay with me?” you ask him. “Theoretically. If the world ended tomorrow?”

That cracks a smile on his face, though it’s light. “Sure I would. Theoretically.” The sun always felt nice on his face.

Your skin was even nicer against his. You rest against his shoulder, and he leans his head to press his ear to the side of your face.

“If my metal body’s good for anythin’, I’d try to shield you from the blast.”

You snort. “I appreciate it, though I don’t think even a cyborg can withstand the sun exploding.” You reach up and pet his hair. The white strands pool along your fingertips like running water.

He leans into your touch. “Still. I gots ta try.”

You sigh and flick his forehead lightly. “All theoretical, Boothill.”

The cowboy hums, and you feel it ripple across your skin like waves. “Course.”

“Hopefully the world doesn't end tomorrow,” you add. “You still haven’t taught me how to play the guitar.”

Boothill turns his head so his nose presses to the side of your face. Although his skin is cold, you feel warm and fuzzy. “Even if the world ends, I’d be happy right here.” He reaches down and pats your lap firmly.

He feels your face heat up and you groan. “You’re terrible.”

His cold lips press to your temple and he snickers. “You like it.”

[hotluncheddie]

high masking autistic steve harrington follow on from this post

ao3

wc: 2.6k | rated: T | cw: description of a meltdown with semi aggressive stimms | tags: autistic steve harrington (and eddie and robin but this is about stevie), hurt/comfort, stobin soulmates, steddie, steve Harrington has shitty parents

.𖥔 ݁ ˖

he failed. he graduated. but he failed. those unsaid words between him and his parents. some get said. the bad ones, about him, they get said. over again like he’s 5 and being told is behaviour isn’t acceptable. that how he is isn’t right. ‘shape up or ship out’, basically. steve knows he can’t go anywhere new, not right now. only freshly recovered, physically at least. mentally; he’s still unacceptable. 

when steve works at scoops. it’s so fucking bright in there. so fucking bright, all day and he can’t focus and talking to people gets so much harder. it’s not like school where he can zone out in class and turn it on during lunch, in between, keep up his face with the people around him and sink back into his head during chemistry. no. now it’s all the time, customer after customer. that he has to talk to, put on a smile for, read so he gives them what they want and they leave happy. it’s exhausting. girls don’t like him anymore, they don’t react to him the same way. he doesn’t think he likes them much either though because they’re so much more annoying when it’s so fucking bright. 

but robin (robin who cycles to work with sunglasses on and doesn’t take them off till she has too) she turns the lights down during open and close. so those couple hours, it’s not so bad. not so stressful. a little bit less loud. 

after the mall burns down steve starts letting her in. tries too. she makes it obvious enough to him that she wants him there. she asks him to stay and calls him at night and he just wants to be enough for her. eventually he’d swallowed his pride and bolstered his courage and called her after a string of nightmares. asking her to stay the night. but then she was there, and it was like everything was thrown off. she was grating on his already freyed nerves but he didn’t know what to say. how to fix it without upsetting her. 

but that night, a mirror of the mall bathroom played out in steves en-suite. steve had freaked. hidden. but she didn’t leave. and he tried to explain. 

he needs her but he doesn’t know how to have her as a true friend. ‘i dunno how to talk to a girl if i don’t wanna date them. i uh, maybe, don’t really know how to talk to someone as myself. as a friend. sorry.’ 

‘well i don’t know how to talk to jocks so. same boat.’ and she has this glint in her eye. like she knows. and it’s okay. 

because robin, she made it simple. she makes it easy. she says just ask and she’ll be honest and give him a yes or no. she’ll say if she can’t be touched right now, or if the movie he chose is pissing her the fuck off. and she wants the same from him. if the music is too loud, if she needs to let him not speak for a while. wants him honest and present and real. real friends. someone close. finally. 

it’s rocky at first. she’s honest and he’s not used to it. it feel like criticism more often than not. makes him see red and lash out, like he was never able to with his parents. but he apologises and she stays. and he’s learning; that’s it’s okay, he’s not perfect and that means she’s knowing the real him. and she’s still his best friend even if he has to tell her to stop picking her nail polish off around him because it makes him want to die. and she laughs at him the first time she sees him in real recovery mode; hair not styled and he has on the only sweatshirt that ever feels good when he’s like this. 

they lay on the floor in darkness and silence. it’s perfect. they share a tin of soup and a grilled cheese. it’s perfect. 

being around robin as much as he is, its so new, having someone see so many parts of you. sometimes she laughs at him asking steve ‘why’d your voice change?’ but steve didn’t even know it had. he was, he was just talking to someone else quick, being nice like you’re supposed to, attentive to make them feel good. he didn’t know his voice changed that much. 

‘girls would like you more if you talked normal to them. how you do to me.’ 

steve swallowed thickly. he just. he just doesn’t know that thats true. nancy left, he talked to her about lots of things, too many things. she like him better at the start. before some of his black tar innards spilled out. before he freaked. before he was able to paste himself back together and she saw him for what he really is. 

he thinks of his parents. how they don’t know him and still don’t like him. anxiety prickles at his fingertips at the thought of those times they do come home. 

because with them there the routine he’s carved for himself, those quiet moments of darkness that he so craves. they’re gone. now it’s tv static and plates clanging and having to show his face at dinner again. but he’s not ten anymore. now he’s an adult whose still drowning in the tension of the room, never able to say what’s really going on, never allowed to ask how they really feel, never taught how to figure his feeling out. no listening ear for steve as a child, and the ice only grew thicker with time. 

it’s his skin itching at his mother stirring her tea across the house, spoon agains porcelain. it’s the hair on the back of his neck standing up at the sound of ice clinking in his fathers scotch glass. it’s triggered memories playing over and over again. it’s being plagued, by ghosts who haunt him, who left but come back every so often, like poltergeists. polietgists with the deed to the house, and ownership over steve, through blood and fear alone. 

‘when they get back you come to mine steve yeah? you come home.’

because now theres not just robin. there’s eddie. 

he sees everything. and more. even when steve’s trying to hide. eddie sees. 

he noticed steve squinting at the hospital and asked the nurse to turn the lights down. he saw how he started zoning out at a diner with the kids, their arguing reaching a pitch, asked steve to keep him company for a smoke break. once they were outside eddie said he just needed a moment, ‘those kids can be animals’. said it and looked a him like he didn’t need an answer, let steve just breathe a focus on the sound of the wind. 

it’s like there’s a million tiny moments, a million tiny cracks in him forming the more he’s around eddie. like his soft underbelly is mewling any time he’s around, wanting attention, wanting to let eddie see. let eddie touch. 

eddie used to look at him sometimes, across the lunch hall. stare at him with an expression steve couldn’t really make sense of. he used to think it was judgment, annoyance. now he wonders if that face was confusion or interest. maybe eddie’s always been trying to figure steve out. 

once it starts. them. eddie’s everywhere. more somehow, maybe, than robin because, you know, they go there. but it’s different, from those time, with those girls. instead now he’s there and his brains off and on in a, like, magical way. a new way that makes him feel whole and, and beautiful. 

this thing they have. it’s fragile. it’s not perfect. he messes up, takes him a moment to grasp how eddie can be so so himself, always, no matter what. especially when it causes him problems. ‘why not just try and fit in?’ but the stone faced reply told steve that was the wrong thing to say, he didn’t get it but he needed to respect it. respect eddie and his choices. ‘i’m not like you steve, even if my brain shit was all gone i’d still be poor, i’d still be othered. still be a gay weirdo little freak.’ 

and steve is trying to get it. he’s learning to recognise that it’s sadness and confusion in eddie’s eyes when he visits him at work, knowing steve is having a bad day and watching him pretend. watching that mask form thick and fast, hiding the real him, protecting but also keeping everyone far far away. steve thinks maybe they’re living parallels. finding different ways to survive. neither better, neither worse. both far from perfect. 

then that pinched sadness in eddie’s eyes. watching steve pretend. cover up. that damn breaks eventually. eddie sees all of him and more. those bits he always kept locked inside. between he and himself. it all comes spilling out. 

they were supposed to be going out soon. but eddie wasn’t feeling it anymore ‘let’s just stay here, be cozy a little longer. what do you say, sweetheart?’ it does sound nice. steves so tired. but they decided. they had a plan. 

‘we said we would. and i have to buy that thing eddie. we had a plan. and i have to go to work later, so we have to do it before. like we said and then i have to work eddie.’ and before he knows it there’s tears prickling his eyes and the ceiling fan is so loud and the desk lamp is too bright and he smacks a fist to the top of his head and it hurts a little but he’s so frustrated and so overwhelmed and so confused and embarrassed, suddenly. and he can’t breath. why can’t he breath? they had a plan. 

they were supposed to go see hopper and pick something up and he has to talk to him and ask about the game because he needs hopper to like him because it’s better when el can come when all the kids hangout. it’s important that she’s happy so hopper needs to trust steve so steve was going to talk to him today and pick something up. it was the plan. hopper makes him nervous but that was the plan. and then he had to go to work. but now he can’t breathe and he feels like he needs something to hurt. 

‘but he already trusts you with el stevie. hop trusts you with anything.’ 

‘i can’t know that. not for sure. when i talk to him it needs to be perfect.’ steve paces. a pinch at his arm. a tug at his hair. pivot. pace. repeat. 

‘i heard what he said to you steve, on your birthday, he was calling you son all day. you don’t need to prove anything to him.’ 

‘i do eddie! you don’t understand. people, they lie. adults lie. they don’t say things the way they mean. i can’t fuck up talking to him. not like i always fuck up talking to my parents. i need to do it better. do it differently. because everyone always leaves. and i just don’t want to be alone again.’ and the tears really start to fall and steve can barely breath and he’s so embarrassed. shaking hands try and cover his face but the tears slip through. 

and all he can think about is the plan. going to work. his vest hanging by the door. the way the plastic tapes feel in his hands. the smell of the bleach they mop the back room with. the day stretches before him. so many things in the way. so much anxiety still to come. if he can’t start, it can’t end. he gnaws at his lip. thumps a hand to his chest, trying to breath right, trying to ground. 

‘i have to go to work’ he mutters. like a prayer. speak it in to happening. taking him away from the now. thump thump thump at his chest. ear ringing. 

eddie’s holding his arms out, giving steve the option. he speaks so calmly, so earnest. ‘you can’t go to work steve. not like this baby.’

steve rounds on him. angry. when did everything get so messed up? if he was just left alone. he should’ve stayed on his own. ‘i cant just call in sick eddie! i’m not sick and and i hate the way they’ll sound when i say it over the phone and knowing what they’ll be thinking about me. they’ll know i hate the job and think i’m lazy and realise how stupid and useless i am and fire me. i can’t afford to get fired eddie. i’d rather just go in.’ he know it comes out garbled, his cheeks on fire. 

‘i’m not letting you go in steve. i’ll sort it. i’ll go pick up robin before and she’ll cover for you, she’ll explain. and she would never. ever think that of you.’ eddie’s voice dropped octave. he speaks clearly and plainly and finally there’s a new plan to follow. a new rule for the day. 

and all steve can do is curl up in a ball and sob. curl up in a ball against eddie chest, in his arms, squeezing his t-shirt between his fingers. clenching his muscles tight, his teeth grinding together. grunting out some of the decade old scream, still stuck there but more visible to him now. 

until finally finally, he relaxes. spent and exhausted. too afraid to open his eyes and face the lamplight, face what could be in eddie’s expression. he drifts..

eventually he gets up, blows his nose and splashed water on his face, turns off all the lights and get back under the warm blanket. fills his lungs. sighs. whispers, ‘m’sorry’ 

‘don’t say that. there’s nothing to apologise for’ eddie’s so close, so warm. 

‘no one’s supposed to ever, see that.. it’s okay if you want to leave’ 

‘steve. why the fuck would i leave you right now?’ 

‘who’d wanna date someone who acts like that? it’s. it’s not good eddie. but, but it’s okay. i’m used to being alo-.’ 

‘please stop stevie. your breaking my heart here. i want to stay, i want to be here with you. i really really like you steve.’ and steve’s cheeks feel wet again. he feels flayed open and young, like a little kid who fell off the swings and everything is different suddenly. 

later later when eddie picks robin up from work she stalks in to where steve’s wrapped up on the couch. curls up into his side and exhales. she bites into his bicep. huffing a sad, annoyed little ‘dingus’ before grabbing his hand and fiddling with his fingers. 

steve feels his eyes prickle again. looking up at the ceiling he croaks out a small ‘sorry.’ for the day. for everything. for anything he can be. and everything he can’t. 

robin kneels on the sofa right next to him. growling a little and placing one of her hands at his sternum and the other at the same height on his back. like she’s forcing herself inside him, holding him together. her hands start to rub up and down quickly, frenzied and grounding for both of them. steve let’s his head hang. eyes closing at the sensation. he grunts. robin grunts back. 

eddie joins. sitting at his other side. slipping a hand in steve’s hair, soothing his scalp with long scratching fingers. and steve humms, sighs, keens. eyes closed he drifts but not away from his body, instead into it. with gratitude, and warmth. at the centre of the two best things that ever happened to him. willing to try again. be just, better. never perfect. 

.𖥔 ݁ ˖

pt 3 snippet

a little happier for u @pearynice <3

ty @spectrum-spectre @vampyreddiemunson @fangirlycupcake @grandwretch for ur tags and additions, it was very inspiring

and tags for lovely @irethsune @willim-billiam-byerson @2jug2head

[prongsfish]

@jegulus-microfic / feb 26 / bed / 576 words

“No fucking way.” 

It took James a few seconds to place the voice. He was barely awake, only just aware of the warm body flushed against his own, the eucalyptus scent his nose was buried in, and Barty Crouch Jr, who he thought was trying to whisper, but was really just hissing words louder than most peoples’ standard volume. He pushed his face deeper into soft hair, feeling Regulus pull James’ arms in closer to himself where he wrapped them around him. 

“Are you seeing this shit, Ev?” Barty continued, and James struggled to resist groaning. He wanted nothing more than to be left alone, basking in the blissful feeling of waking up next to Regulus for as long as physically possible, but he knew that his chances of being left alone would decrease greatly if he showed any sign of wanting it. He didn’t know Regulus’ friends very well, but you pick up a few things about people when obsessed with their best friend, and Barty and Evan seemed like the kind of guys who would cut their own arms off if they knew it’d so much as slightly inconvenience you. 

“I am,” Evan confirmed, mock horror blending with amusement.

“They’re shirtless.” He practically gasped, and James thought Barty sounded far too offended for someone he’d seen sticking his tongue down Evan’s throat many times over breakfast.

“I can’t wait to tell the girls about this.”

“Oh, absolutely,” Barty said, and the two lead into a long conversation about just how hilarious Dorcas and Pandora’s reactions would be. James was seconds away from cursing both of them into oblivion for disturbing his peace when Regulus shifted from in front of him. He let out a distressed noise, gripping tighter to stop him from getting out of bed, and Evan and Barty fell silent for the first time since waking, seeming to finally notice that the pair they were talking about were awake.

“Let go, James,” Regulus mumbled, voice still not fully recovered from sleep. James just whined again. “I’ll be right back, okay?”

James huffed, still not entirely happy to let Regulus leave, but loosened his grip nonetheless and felt as Regulus slowly got up.

“He’s never this bloody nice to us in bed.” Barty grumbled, quickly followed by a shout of “Ow, what the fuck!” and the sound of something being thrown across the dorm. 

“If you value your lives, you’ll leave. Now.”

Evan and Barty just snorted. “Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Evan laughed, and Barty called “See you at breakfast!” as the door opened and they clambered out. 

Regulus sighed as he stepped back closer to the bed again. “Sorry about them, they’re idiots.”

James finally opened his eyes to see Regulus looking down at him from above, light framing his head like a halo, as beautiful as ever. James, despite all his prior whingeing, couldn’t help but smile up at him. He could barely believe he was really here after so long of never letting himself imagine it, limiting the way his stomach would flip over the boy to impossible fantasies and daydreams, but there he was. The dungeons were much colder than the Gryffindor dorms, but James couldn’t deny the warmth that spread through him anyway. 

So, when Regulus sat down on the edge of the bed and James rose to lean into his side, he knew he was telling the truth when he said, “S’alright baby, just glad to be here.”

[snoopyliker]

Pepito pulled Bad aside from Pomme and Dapper had a conversation | QSMP - The New Year Approaches… 2:03:10

Pepito: Uncle Bad I don’t want Pomme or Dapper to read this. I want them to feel that I’m growing :-D And that I’m not so small anymore. Today I felt a lot of fear for Leo, Sunny, Richas D: I want to protect them like how they protect me. I look smaller but I’ve learned a lot. And now I can protect them. I want when Apa Roier returns for him to be proud of me and also Apa Quackity :-D I’d like you guys to know that you don’t need to worry so much about me :-D To prioritize being happy :D If they’re happy then I’m happy too.

Bbh: I understand Pepito if you want your siblings to be happy.. I understand Pepito.

Pepito: I promise that if I’m in danger again I’ll be stronger.

Bbh: Aw Pepito! That’s- Look that’s very sweet of you. I know you are very tough, a very tough little guy, okay? I mean you’re not that little you’re a month old now. And obviously being a month old means you have more responsibilities, you have more things that you have to do, um, and so I think this is good that you want to take on more responsibilities Pepito. And so obviously yes I will trust you to help keep an eye on your siblings, um, and making sure that they’re safe. But Pepito! I also want you to keep this in mind, okay? Is as your parents, and your aunts, and your uncles, right? It’s our job to keep an eye on you guys. So, I will allow you Pepito to help protect me, okay? And all of your siblings as long as you remember that we’re also going to help protect you too, okay? So just keep that in mind, that we’re going to keep an eye on you and you watch our backs as well, okay Pepito?

(Pepito nods & jumps in agreement)

Bbh: Okay. We can all take care of each other cause we’re all one big family aren’t we? Aw, I’m so proud of you Pepito. Aw you’re growing up so fast! Just don’t grow up too quickly little guy! Aww.

Pepito: I met Apa Quackity :0 I felt a great need to make him smile. I think there are many ways to take care of others :D And how to make them happy.

Bbh: That is very mature Pepito. That is very true. There are lots of ways to take care of other people. You can make them happy, you can keep them physically safe, you can make food for them, theres tons of ways you can help take care of people. ... I think just by playing that game, uh, with Quackity, by spending time with him by hanging out with him, you made your papa so happy. Because as parents we’re happy when our kids are happy. It brings us joy to know that we’re doing a good job raising you and taking care of you.

Pepito: Do you think I can achieve that with Apa Roier?

Bbh: Hmm. You know what? I definitely think you can Pepito. In fact, I’ll say it certainly. You certainly will be able to.

Pepito: In the photo Richas gifted me you can see Apa Roier smiling.

Bbh: Yes, um, I think Pepito your Apa Roier has been through a lot, right? Um, the older you get Pepito, um, life kinda hits you over the head with a hammer periodically, sometimes a lot sometimes a little, everybody’s situation is different. Um, but uh I do think that with time you can be healed of pretty much everything, okay? Almost everything. And I think with time your papa will smile again. So don’t lose hope little guy. Keep your spirits up and just trust that your dad will be happy again. And just be there for him. That’s the best you can do.

Pepito: I will try >:D

Bbh: And that’s all you have to do, don’t be upset, just try. And keep your hope up, okay? You’re doing great already. I definitely think he’ll smile again.

Pepito: Thank you Uncle Bad :-D I’m going to sleep now.

[wickjump]

Idk if ive ever asked this or if it was someone else

but what are your thoughts on child!dream!!! like he was still six when he got out of stone

i think its such a fun trope because theres so many possibilities

like angsty, where he keeps the facade of being an adult, with so many people putting pressure and their expectations onto this poor child

or fluff where its just him with found family (im more partial to star sanses and error with that part,, its my errorinkberry truther side)

but i think theres so many fun dynamics with it!!!

i think it’s fucking incredible. not only because he deserves to have a good childhood and also trauma, but also because it implies the existence of teenager dream and by god i want to see that.

child!dream would listen to first love/late spring by mitski and bawl. ‘I was so young when I behaved twenty-five, and now I found I’ve grown into a tall child’ yeah okay dream sans give the mic back. him being a child and forced into battle, desperately crying out for his brother and hoping to god he can be with his brother again, not grasping that his brother is gone, he’s dead and not coming back.

but god i also love the fluffy side too. like he deserves a happy childhood. ink swap and error hiding the truth of nightmare from him, fighting it on their own to give dream a happy childhood. nightmare knows dream is out there, and tries to find him, but ink swap and error refuse to let him find dream bc they basically adopted the kid now ain’t no way you’re taking him from us!!!!!!!

they excuse their absences (fighting) with the excuse of them trying to find nightmare, because dream won’t stop asking where his brother is and when he’s coming home.

and if we want to be self indulgent and happy we can have them save passive someway somehow and they’re raised together as brothers n get a happy ending idk… id pay someone to draw that but alas im broke and all my money’s gone into advil and cat food. maybe ill write it one day who knows

i also really like the idea that nightmare is mentally and physically a child because he inhabits the body of a child so the the positivity vs negativity war is just two six year olds fighting over an apple

[hailmaryfullofgrace55675]

"Changing the well-established definition of “trans woman” to accommodate people who were assigned female who are bigender/genderfluid/nonbinary/detrans/retrans makes it harder for trans women to talk about themselves, their experiences, and their identities without constantly clarifying their AGAB."

"Changing the well-established definition of “woman” to accommodate people who were assigned male who are transfeminine makes it harder for cis women to talk about themselves, their experiences, and their identities without constantly clarifying their AGAB."

Literally no difference between what you're saying and terf rhetoric 🤨

Thanks for sending this ask, because I’ve actually been preparing a post about this exact take but it felt kind of “look at me, I spend 16 hours a day borrowing bad posts from the future to complain about” to post it unprompted.

So, the superficial persuasiveness of this ask relies on an unfortunately common misunderstanding of what this whole “transgenderism” project is about.

The understanding that a lot of people work on is that transgenderism is about “identifying how you want to identify”. This works okay for most encounters with trans people. It appeals to a basic libertarian impulse that also works for a lot of other stuff. Generally, people should get to do stuff they want to do and define themselves how they want to define themselves, and when applied to transgender desires this results in people expressing their felt relationships with the social construct of gender and transitioning.

This is not actually what transgender political activism or transfeminism are about. The project of transgenderism did not start with the application of the general concept of personal liberty to the sphere of gender, it started with the concerns of actually existing people: people whose felt and lived relationships with gender were contrary to - crossing - “trans” - the male or female roles they had been assigned.

The transgender project is the project of transgender liberation. It is the project of enabling access to social and biomedical transition. It is the project of enabling escape from the coercive social process of gender assignment. It is the project of creating space in which people who desire to cross the boundaries of their assigned genders can live fulfilled, happy, dignified lives; openly or quietly. Maybe sometime in the next few centuries it will become the project of total liberation through gender abolition, but for now it is the project of making gender work for trans people.

“Changing the well-established definition of “woman” to accommodate people who were assigned male who are transfeminine makes it harder for cis women to talk about themselves, their experiences, and their identities without constantly clarifying their AGAB” is a poor, transphobic understanding of the history of gender and of the impacts of trans activism on cis women, but to the extent that it is true, it is good. It is the transgender project. It is the transfeminist project. It is the gender-liberatory project. Cis people SHOULD have to specify that they’re cis. They SHOULD see it as not the only way to be a woman or a man. Cis women should adapt to understanding that they were not merely “born female” but rather assigned femaleness at birth. They should adapt to understanding that they do not have “female bodies” but rather whatever physical features they have and that these features are shared by people of many gender and not shared by all women. Is it inconvenient to learn about marginalized people and adjust your language to accommodate them? Sure, it can be. It’s also the right thing to do.

The TERF logic in “saying trans women are women is inconvenient for cis women” isn’t “uses of language can cause inconvenience for groups of people”, it’s “transfeminism is bad because it says cis women are privileged and not the only real women”.

There is no such implication in “using trans woman to mean a woman who is trans regardless of assigned gender is inconvenient for trans women”. Aside from sentence structure, these are not parallel statements. The underlying logic of “trans women are women” is the underlying logic of the transgender project: that trans people’s relationships with womanhood and manhood are as legitimate as cis people’s relationships with womanhood and manhood. It is the transfeminist claim that trans women ARE women, real women, that womanhood includes trans women and actually always has. It is the historical analysis that for as long as there has been gender assignment there have been people who crossed those assignments and for as long as there have been men and women there have been people who were told to be men and became women instead. The underlying logic of “AFAB trans people who identify as women are trans women” is “the words trans people use to talk about trans stuff don’t really mean anything, so I can use them for whatever”.

Quite simply, “AFAB trans people shouldn’t identify as trans women because it causes intracommunity problems for trans women, the assigned male kind” is not TERF logic because it is an argument in defense of trans women, in defense of the legitimacy of trans women’s identities and experiences as particular and meaningful, and against transmisogyny. “Trans women shouldn’t identify as women because it causes problems for Real Women, the cis kind” is TERF logic because it is transmisogyny with a feminist gloss.

[sublimeinal-messages]

OKAY OKAY SO THE TRAILER’s DROPPED AND WHILE IM SO BEYOND PSYCHED TO SEE EVERYONE I HAVE SOME OBSERVATIONS. (With pictures). Apologies for the long post lol

First off:

Powers confirmed coming back for everyone!

Five is teleporting, Viktor’s powered up, Ben’s got the horror, Luther has his muscles again

Speaking of Luther, he seems to be all over the place. In some shots he has his muscles, in some he doesn’t, in one shot he’s donning spacegear, another he’s in a ballpit, and they even make him sit in the back of the van for old time’s sake

No Sloane tho?? No sparrows at all as far as I can tell :| idk how to feel about that

Another little detail I noticed was when they all pile in the van together, Lila calls shotgun and is promptly shoved aside by Five out of sheer pettiness. And then she has to sit in the middle

They seem to have a bonding moment in the subway with Lila sobbing as Five holds onto her, which I’m very curious about (and scared)

Diego’s shown at a birthday party taking care of a little girl!! With braids! Possibly their daughter? Talk of a rescue mission makes me think their daughter might be kidnapped

Allison shown with a kid also has me thinking Claire returns which makes me so happy

Allison also doesn’t seem to be shot in a villainous or shunned light, so it looks like this season isn’t intent on bashing her (yet. As far as I can see, which honestly thank goodness…)

The dark circles under Ben’s eyes worry me, almost as much as the shot of him in prison(?) and him seemingly being out of sync with the others. Is this Sparrow Ben perhaps? Does it have anything to do with the possibility of there being another Ben? (Maybe he’s accused of identity theft?)

There’s also Another Tentacle in the promo image shared yesterday which I noticed. Maybe a second horror?

I thought maybe it had something to do with Jennifer since there’s been an actor hired for a character with that name, but now I wonder with the two Bens situation…

Reginald might have his Umbrella academy in the woods again? aligning with the comics. Unless this is someone else’s house. But the windows and white brick match.

Really curious how the academy has been rebranded in this universe to be a house for boys. Six, specifically. Seeing as how Allison is the only umbrella-born girl, it’s interesting to see how this universe has shifted to accommodate them all

Viktor might be a bartender?? The area looked familiar but it could just be my eyes. But apart from his Direct Interview with Reginald, (oooh scary) he seems to get in a physical fight with someone. Which is a new approach for him as a characater

Forgive my shitty captures but if it’s not Luther, diego, klaus or five I’m guessing it must be Ben?? But it’s hard to say, but he sure is going at it tho

Who are the square dancers??? My heart wants it to be jayme and Alphonso but the people here look older to me, so it could be Nick Offerman and Megan Mullalley.

Actually upon inspection the fuzzy square dancer has a matching beard pattern to Nick offerman Exactly. So that’s absolutely him.

Klaus really seems to be struggling again, and has those plastic gloves in almost every shot I see. Him dressing dark and drab also says something about his state of mind as well as the panic attack he seems to have :( but at least they’re all back together 🥲

Looks like they also seem to celebrate Christmas together? And a birthday. Honestly I’m just so happy to see them together for events like this I love these dysfunctional dorks so much

There’s so many more things I’m sure I missed and I’ll be rewatching this a few more times until the season drops (three months!!) but in the wise words of Diego: Let’s Fucking GOOOOOOOO I’m so excited for this. HELL YEAH, THE UMBRELLAS BACK TOGETHER AGAIN BAYBEEE

[diningchairs]

dewmac thesis? please? for the sake of the people of course

OH BOY, YIPEE!!

i am going to be so annoying, so for all the dewmac enjoyers (hi taylor and katie) and dewmac-curious people, let me explain

some people may ask WHY i ship them and the answer is simple: i am a freak enjoyer, delusional and these are my barbie dolls.

first, i’m gonna go over the lore…which is very limited but when had that EVER stopped me from shipping??

October 30, 2021 - nate goes after dewey after dewey lays a dirty hit on bo byram. they’re both bad at fighting, so it’s funny. love the quote, “down he goes, duhaime on top of him”. (x)

now all the way too

March 7th, 2024 - Brandon Duhaime gets traded to the Colorado Avalanche

March 12th, 2024 - Attack Dog. During a game against the Calgary Flames, Dewey goes after a player who was bothering Nate. NOW THIS IS WHAT I LIKE TO SEE!! That is exactly what you’re supposed to do, Dewey, good boy. Connor McGahey had this say about it in an episode of Peak Access:

“There was a Calgary player who was wacking at Mackinnon and immediately, Duhaime recognized the situation and went to the Flames player and tried to track him down and made sure that he was leaving Nathan Mackinnon alone and then went back on the bench and gave Nathan Mackinnon a little tap on the knee and said, ‘I got you, I got your back’ and that’s the time of player Duhaime is, he’s got you back” (x, 5:53 is the bit about Dewey)

SO FUN, RIGHT?!?!?!!!!

March 30th, 2024 - I have no videos for this but just know that I saw them laughing on the bench together and everything felt right. Now as a Nate supporter first, human being second, I felt very protective over Nate and certain people claiming that he was going to “ruin” Dewey. So when I saw them laughing and having a good time, I was just happy because believe it or not, Nate isn’t some evil person devoid of fun, happiness, and sugar.

April 8th, 2024 - DEWEY’S FIRST GOAL AS AN AV! And guess what… he points to Nate RIGHT after (x)

Okay so now onto my thesis.

Obviously a big reason for shipping them is seeing two freaks and thinking, “ooo, they should fuck nasty” but there’s a little more to the narrative here.

Dewey was traded away from HIS TEAM, from his team that meant to much to him. He even said in the Peak Access episode I mentioned earlier that he was excited to play for Colorado but sad to leave Minnesota. He was also RIPPED AWAY from his best friend, Connor Dewar, who was then ripped away from Minnesota. Not to mention, Dewey was brought here because we needed a physical player for our playoffs roster.

So. Dewey’s now in Colorado, all alone. (Yes, we’ve all seen the arrival and airport photos where he looks miserable, which i’m not denying he wasn’t but also: That’s Just His Face)

And just a few games after being traded, he becomes an attack dog for Nate. And GOD, it was just hot and kind of unexpected?

Dewey takes all of his anger/frustration/sadness from the trade and puts that into defending his new team—especially Nate—by getting physical and going after other players.

In my mind, they’re friends with benefits. And they absolutely know that they are NOT each other’s first choice. But they still fuck nasty. And Dewey was never intimated by Nate at all. He was so pissed from the trade that he just doesn’t GIVE A FUCK. And then he plays with the Avs and is like, “ohhhh okay, I will lay down my life for Nate I guess. Also I want to fuck him to fuck me.” And so he’s using Nate as someplace to put his emotions again.

And Nate is all for it. Another fun thing is that, *slaps Nate*, you can fit so many terrible love situations into this bad boy! Is he fucking Dewey because his love for Sid is unrequited? Is Cale ignoring his texts? Was he reminded of his thing with Tyson Barrie? Or Burky?

More on their relationship dynamic:

So yeah. In conclusion, dewmac nation NEEDS TO RISE because they are so mean and nasty to each other yet they need each other to balance out their emotions from stupid trades and playoffs and other hockey related problems.

I hope you enjoyed! It’s kind of hard for me to explain ship dynamics sometimes because I will just keep rambling. And ships are always evolving in my head as I get more comfortable with writing them.

Okay, now i’m gonna go write something about these freaks

[didyoupainthis]

One thing I see on bylertok way too much is people pointing out that even though Will told Mike it’s “not possible” that he’d ever join another party (replace Mike), Mike still went and joined Hellfire after he told Will to grow up and move on from D&D in S3 (which Will ended up doing)

It takes everything in me not to summarize the situation every single damn time I see someone mentioning it as if it’s proof that Mike ‘doesn’t deserve Will’ or something because it’s so frustrating that people just don’t understand anything about Mike and try and cling to any bit of ‘fault’ in his actions to justify why Byler wouldn’t work and why they don’t ship it

Because this whole ordeal had nothing to do with Mike and Will’s friendship, it was bought about in the first place by Mike and El’s ever incompatible relationship

Mike loves D&D, he loves writing, he loves being DM for the Party, he loves being with the Party. He never stopped loving these things, he stopped pursuing his interests because he was so over invested in being ‘normal’, which in his mind means ditching his friends for his girlfriend. El doesn’t like D&D, she doesn’t share Mike’s interests in his favourite things and because of that, Mike dropped all of it in favour of making out with El. Because that’s what you’re supposed to do in a relationship, and so that’s what he did

Of course, none of that is El’s fault either; El is learning the world and will eventually learn what she likes personally when she befriends Max whilst Mike is lost in juggling between what he should like vs. what he actually does like

All that is to say;

Mike dropped D&D because of El

(again, not El’s fault I’m not trying to blame her for anything it just is what it is)

So circling back to the “not possible” moment, I wanna point out that Mike’s insecurity in that moment specifically is Will leaving him emotionally because Will already is physically leaving and Mike blames himself. He’s mentioned himself obviously that he’s afraid of losing Will but he’s also made it clear many times. After their fight, Mike just wants to know that Will would still choose him and Will assures him that he wouldn’t be replacing Mike. Will placed no expectations on Mike when he said this, he just wanted to reassure Mike that they’re okay and that they’ll be okay which is exactly what Mike wanted

After Will and El left, Mike joined Hellfire because he could focus on doing the things he liked again without having to devote himself to being El’s boyfriend. I was happy for Mike to have D&D back when I first watched S4 and I know Will would be happy that Mike is finding himself again. And while we’re on the topic of Mike finding himself, since he’s joined Hellfire he’s started slowly accepting himself and accepting that he doesn’t care anymore if he fits into the standard or not. He doesn’t care about popularity or people liking him. He is growing and he’s been getting his character development

Anyway that’s all I just love analysing Mike it’s so interesting, but in this case I don’t think it even needs to be analysed. Mike isn’t himself around El and that’s got nothing to do with Will— that’s just Milevens relationship dynamic

[soiarsys]

i sometimes see people say things like, “nobody has a role in my system. we dont fit into any because we’re more like, “guy who is sad” and “girl who is productive”.” or even, “i can’t be [role] because sometimes im weak/sad/self destructive/etc etc”

firstly i want to say, this is okay!! don’t use roles if you don’t want to! make up your own, even!

but i also want to remind everyone that fully formed alters (as in, not fragments) are full, multidimensional people, and people aren’t always consistent. we’re also all traumatized, and that shows sometimes no matter who is fronting. protectors can be scared. trauma holders can be happy. persecutors can be kind to their system. the definition of the role doesn’t have to be the definition of you as an alter. protectors are just alters who feel protective over, and sometimes physically protect their system. that doesn’t mean they can’t be scared sometimes, that doesn’t mean they automatically can handle a traumatic situation well, that doesn’t mean they never feel depressed. same goes for any other role.

also, there absolutely are roles for things that are more complicated too, if you want to use them. some people like being “guy who is sad” while others like being “trauma holder” or “depression holder”, even if it might mean the same thing to them. roles don’t have rules, they’re created by us, and what is making you [role] can be anything, depending on how you interpret it. and you can still have one even if you don’t feel like you are any of the “common” roles. even if what you do in the system is hyperspecific and uncommon, you can still find/make a role for it. but you don’t have to. it’s also just a descriptor.

this is getting long and im not entirely sure this gets my point across, but i have been seeing more and more stuff like this, and i think people shouldn’t be scared away by roles just because they’re so broad and there can be so many. just like nobody should have to identify with roles, nobody should be intimidated or scared away if it might be beneficial or fun for their system.

also if you are looking for roles, there’s pluralpedia (keep in mind this is an endo friendly website, whether that keeps you away or pulls you in to the website isn’t what this is about i just know it’s commonly mentioned). there are also lots of instagram accounts and tumblr blogs who coin (create) roles! you’re bound to find some if you look under the tags or even scroll through a system blog long enough. if anyone coins roles on their blog or knows any other role lists/carrds/docs/etc plss reblog with them!

[nburkhardt]

Love is…..

An angst feast 🥳

The idea of someone loving every bit of you is a dream, the feelings you get from someone’s smile aimed at you makes you fearless. Seeing their happiness, it can make your heart melt and you‘re happy just because they’re happy.

Love is something so powerful, so beautiful, so strong.

It’s something not to play with.

1984

“This is bullshit! You’re bullshit!” Nancy’s voice is slurred, she’s swaying slightly and her face is red. Eyes not focusing properly, drunk and angry.

Steve freezes, arm raised up to clean her shirt. “What?”

“Bullshit” Nancy repeats herself and sways again, dangerously close to falling. She’s not even looking at him now, just staring ahead with unfocused eyes and anger coming off her in waves.

He doesn’t know what to do, he’s frozen in his spot. The silence of the room with muffled music coming from the rest of the house is suddenly too quiet, he looks at her in disbelief. Unsure how to take this, hurt and confused. She mumbles about Barb, mumbles something with his name again and repeats bullshit over and over.

His original plan was gone, spilled out of a cup with juice and alcohol. Being a normal teenager isn’t a possibility now, his ears are buzzing and he feels numb. The words repeat in his head, it’s the only thing he can hear as he rushes out of the bathroom and then the house. It takes too long, too many people are around.

He needs out of this house, needs to be alone.

He doesn’t bother with his car, just walks home. The cold air hitting him, he uses that as an excuse to let the tears fall. It shouldn’t hurt, she was drunk and he did play a part in Barb’s death. He knows this, it keeps him up at night, it’s why his pool is drained and covered. Calling their love, his love bullshit? It hurts even though she was just drunk.

There’s a whisper in his ear, sounding too much like his mom: “drunk words are sober thoughts”

Getting to his empty house, doesn’t help his already overwhelmed head. He doesn’t bother with lights or kicking off his shoes, just go straight to his room and curls into a ball on his bed. Letting the breakdown he held back, work its way out. He’s finally alone, he can break. He falls asleep with tears falling, a heart breaking while curled in a ball.

Nancy thinks it nothing, that they’re okay.

He asks her to say “I love you” and she doesn’t, looks like she physically can’t say those words. And that’s it. No more relationship.

Maybe it wasn’t supposed to last, maybe they weren’t good together. Maybe if Barb hadn’t died or the upside down wasn’t around, they could’ve made it further.

All Steve knows is, he was in love with her. Maybe even still is in love with her. Love everything about her, from how smart she is down to her pretty blue eyes. He was ready to stop the world for her. Now he knows she didn’t feel the same, he wants to believe she did at one point. Just, not anymore.

The rest of his senior year is spent with his head down, alone and staying far away from Nancy Wheeler.

1986

Making it to nineteen years old is a miracle.

Spending his last few birthdays alone is embarrassing, but no one knows it and at this point he wants to keep it that way. It’s only been two years, but he’s realized how much it hurts to let people in only for them to break his heart.

Whether it be romantic or platonic love.

After the Russian drugs and actual torture together, he and Robin are closer than ever. Even if she didn’t mean to, she solidified his opinion on himself and relationships. That they aren’t for him. The people he’s fallen for just keep breaking his heart and his heart has so much love to give.

Maybe too much love.

He spends the first two months of the new year having quick fun dates to get laid and that’s it. Even with his heart screaming at him to find someone to love, he can’t bring himself to let anyone in.

He’s not completely happy, but he’s okay. At least, that’s what he’s telling himself.

March rolls around, the start of the month is easy. No upside down surprises and only the kids asking for rides a few times. Then spring break rolls around suddenly things aren’t okay anymore.

One second he’s watching the news about a murder then the next time he blinks, he’s being pinned to the wall of a boat house. He’ll be honest, the whole trip to the upside down he blacked out. Defeating Vecna and making it back top side is too blurry, happened too fast.

Everyone is alive, they all made it out.

He doesn’t know how but they are and he’s so goddamn thankful for it. Didn’t want to lose anyone else, even Eddie Munson who he didn’t even care about not even a full week ago.

But he has a bleeding heart, a need to love more and having one more friend is fair game. Even if that friend only tolerates him and probably doesn’t consider him a friend and that’s okay, he knows the rules now.

He can put his everything into friendships and doesn’t expect the same in return. He’s not greedy, he’ll take what he can get.

Apparently his heart on the other hand, doesn’t know the rules. Because four months later, it hits him.

It’s like a punch to the gut, the realization. One second it wasn’t there and the next he’s frozen with his heart beating out of his chest. He can’t breathe, his mind racing with all the thoughts of this realization.

It races as he tries to think, how did he miss this? How did he not know? How did he fall in love again? He wasn’t trying to, he was fine.

Things were fine.

His friendship with Eddie Munson was enough. He was happy with the hang outs, trading joints, eating pizza and poking fun at the kids. He knows on his part that they’re friends, knows that he’s not even in Eddie’s close circle of friends.

They’re just trauma-bonded friends.

It wasn’t never said out loud, but it was there. He knows that.

Yet.

Yet, here he is. Sitting on the floor of Eddie’s room, swapping stories and enjoying a few joints together. Listening to Eddie laugh about something Jeff did during their last band practice, and it’s then. That’s it.

The sound of Eddie’s happiness.

That’s the realization and he can’t breathe.

“Man, I’m telling you that guy is amazing” Eddie huffs another laugh, a smile spreading on his face then a shake of his head, “if he was single, I’d so grabbed him up. He’d be everything”

Steve’s ears are burning, his heart is breaking and he only just realized his own feelings and they’re already breaking.

Swallowing down the heartbreak, he huffs out a laugh and goes, “yeah? Jeff- uh, Jeff’s the one for you?”

“Well yeah, he’s been my best friend forever! He’s hot, smart and likes metal? The whole package that one” Eddie’s smiling and looking up at his ceiling, “He was the first person I told that i like men, then it was this giant crying feast. It was so nice to finally have a person, someone who understood me, ya know?”

It’s slow but he nods, his heart beating out of his chest, something in the back of his head is screaming at him to leave. “Yeah- yeah, that’s amazing!”

It sounds fake to his own ears, but it seems Eddie’s just high enough to not notice a difference. It’s quiet now, the only sounds coming from outside.

Eddie’s smiling and smoking his joint, content and happy.

Forcing a smile, he continues sitting in the silence with his heart breaking and his brain screaming at him to run away, get far enough away to lock the his heart away.

To break down in peace, alone.

Eventually the high really hits and he falls asleep to the sound of Eddie humming and laughing, it’s lovely, it’s his favorite sound. It’s heartbreaking, it’s the worst thing to fall asleep to.

It brings dreams of hope. Of Eddie smiling at him, saying he loves him and he wakes up after a dream of Eddie throwing his arms around him and going in for a kiss.

He’s panicking and he’s tearing up. Looking at Eddie, sound asleep on his bed, he forces himself to swallow back a sob before walking out to finally have that breakdown.

Before he can even make it out of the trailer, he freezes as he’s met with Eddie’s Uncle Wayne sitting at the little table nursing a cup of coffee. “Mornin’, leaving this early?”

Clearing his throat, he nods, “yeah, I- uh, gotta get Robin later and she’ll um,” he shakes his head and moves closer and closer to the door, “I’ll see you around”

It’s a lie, he can’t bring himself to come around here anytime soon. This is too much all of a sudden, he’s quick or at least he thought he was quick at wiping his eyes.

Wayne is up and next to him between blinks, his lips in a frown, “Boy, what’s the tears for?”

“It’s nothing, Mr. Munson” he lies, opening the door, “I really need to leave now”

His hand is on the doorknob, Wayne is still staring at him with a confused expression. It’s quiet, it’s late and he needs to leave but he’s frozen in place. It takes him minutes to finally turn the knob before walking out and to his car. With Wayne’s eyes following him.

Once he’s at home, alone in an empty house.

He breaks and cries.

Love is heartbreaking.

———

Oh hi. I broke my own heart and I never actually used the prompt that inspired this whole thing. But I couldn’t figure out how to turn it around 🫠

So that means, a second part with a happy ending will happen 🥳 but for now you get tears, sorry about that.

Permanent tag list: (sorry everyone 🫣) @spectrum-spectre @itsfreakingbats @mysticcrownshipper @artiststarme @harvesteee @thereindeerlady @justforthedead89 @ronniescontinuum @freyaforestafay @littlewildflowerkitten @sierra-violet @estrellami-1 @gregre369 @zerokrox-blog

[kataraslove]

katara isn't sutble at all in her interest in aang i think zutaras have their blinders on if they can't see how much she was into him. its why i find that fandom so frusterating i've never seen a pairing that was so obvious and yet they act like it was one sided.. when katara was all into him since ep 1 to wanting to run off with him when he got banished. if that dont scream girl is gonna fall in love with main character i dont know what does.

in order to understand katara’s feelings for aang, you need to understand katara’s character at a fundamental level. unfortunately, many, many people in the fandom do not and refuse to understand. for an example, a common misconception is that katara crushed on jet because he was the tall, good-looking “bad boy” archetype. while she did have an instant infatuation for jet because he was tall and good-looking, he was also brave, charming, and heroic and a natural leader to her - all components that katara’s described about aang throughout the series.

“You’ve been training for this since the day we met. I've seen your progress. You're smart, brave, and strong enough.” Katara in Nightmares and Daydreams.

the depths of katara’s love for aang can be seen in the ways that she speaks about him:

“Aang is the bravest person I know!” (The Storm)

“Please don’t go, Aang. The world can’t afford to lose you to the Fire Nation. Neither can I.” (The Winter Solstice Part 2)

in the ways that she’s fiercely protective over him:

in the ways that she’s physically affectionate with him:

in the ways that she gets immensely happy when he acknowledges her power or calls her heroic:

in the ways that she cries when they’re apart:

and in the ways that she cries when they’re reunited:

or when he tells her how much she means to him:

I mean, after they get through a really emotionally charged moment, or overcome danger or death, just look at the way she looks at him. look at the way she hugs him.

only in the atla fandom will someone look you straight in the eye and say that character A kissing character B (after the characters literally had an implied cave kiss) on the cheek before they’re separated isn’t meant to be romantic, but rather maternal.

and okay, I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt: it’s true that katara’s feelings were intended to be “ambiguous” up until the climax so that we don’t get any canon verbal confirmation that she was in love with aang. i am critical of that. but nothing in the narrative suggests that katara ever viewed aang as a brother or worse, as a son. katara herself does not admit to that when aang brings it up in the ember island players episode, even when she had time to state that she did view him as a brother or, at the very least, did not see him as a love interest.

if you believe that the ambiguity of katara’s feelings for aang is far too much for you to ship them, that’s fine by me. but at the same time I’ve seen people say that katara had feelings for haru just from one blush. or feelings for zuko from their conversation wherein they bonded over their mother’s deaths in crossroads of destiny. if the hug at the end of the southern raiders can be read as romantic by these same people, why not the many hugs, cheek kisses, face touches, and emotional reactions katara feels towards aang? i do have to believe that the reason why it’s so hard to view these as romantic for people is because aang does not look the part of the stereotypical romantic lead, ie he’s bald, younger than katara, and shorter than her.

[crazylittlejester]

RAHH your wars smile post has given me so many thoughts

first off it’s sad that the fact that wars is at his most genuine the time he really smiles just because he feels happy is when he is literally alone and by himself.

second off the FIC THIS COULD MAKE DONT GIVE ME IDEAS BRO like wars thinking he’s alone when they’re all at the ranch and wind and twi are having fun outside, legend and Hyrule and wild are causing mischief, sky’s taking a well deserved nap, fours reading by a tree, and time gets to spend TIME (pun haha I hate myself grr) with his wife. And wars is just, happy genuinely because everything’s fine he’s on the porch alone in a rocking chair, the most relaxed and happy he’s ever been in forever and they’re just this goofy little grin on his face because my man is happy LET HIM GRIN. and if time saw it from the corner of his eye out the window then that’s his business. and yes eventually legend and twi have to drag him in cus he took a snooze but shhh they’re all happy

okay first of all i love absolutely everything you’ve just said, but wanna add somethin’ cos I ran out of the ability to add more pictures to that post so the yap was cut a bit short, but you reminded me of another thing I’d meant to say alkhgfjhfdg SO I HOPE YOU DON’T MIND THE YAP:

Yes for the most part, Warriors’s real smile is almost a ‘hidden’ thing, it only comes out in full when he’s alone or no one’s looking. HOWEVER: There are a few instances where his little crooked smile is a bit more clear, even when he’s still talking with the others (not fully 100% his real smile, but you can see the one same side of his mouth a tad higher than his fake straight smile). And it’s always moments where he just seems a little bit more relaxed. Specially in ‘Regroup’ when he and Hyrule have just come back and Legend has his bright pink hair and Wars is teasing both him and Sky. When he first comes in and he’s being a bit over the top his smile is clearly more even and straight, even when he’s teasing the others a bit

@/linkeduniverse

but the thing i find interesting about this is he’s standing up talking to a group of people sitting down. He’s the center of attention, he’s aware of it, they’re all looking at him and he knows it. He’s probably a lot more focused on how the others are looking at and perceiving him, they’re LITERALLY physically looking up at him. He’s taller than them because he’s the one standing. On the page AFTER this one, however, once he’s sat down and towards the end of his conversation (including the entire page so people can see how everyone else is physically existing in the space):

now here he seems a little bit more relaxed, and while in the first part of the page the way he’s acting and speaking still comes off as performative, that last panel of him on the bottom seems a little bit less of an act. He doesn’t come off quite as (for lack of a better description) cocky, he seems a little more genuine and down to earth and chill in the way he teases Sky right there, and his smile is a little more crooked than it usually is when he’s joking around with the others. He just went on this whole thing about how he and Hyrule totally had it handled and the two of them were very badass, but he’s poking fun of Sky in an extremely lighthearted way and now that he’s reaching the end of what he has to say he seems… Not like he’s running out of ENERGY, but like he’s just taking the dramatics down and acting just a bit more like himself

Also: He’s no longer standing above them and being intentionally larger than life. He’s still acting a bit, he almost always is, but he seems much more relaxed, and he’s actually put himself in a position where he’s physically beneath the others with the only other person sitting on the ground is Legend. And as someone who is a certified YAPPER, I know when I have a yap coming, I stand up and I say my shit but when I’m getting to the end of the yap I sit down and take a chance to be quiet. And this might just be me, but that does seem like what Warriors is doing here. He’s done his bit, he got his yap in, but he’s done now and probably tired after battle and walking all over the place, and he’s bringing himself AND his energy down to get ready to eat and calm down for the night

The others may not have really seen his REAL smile (or if they did Wars has no idea because he wasn’t aware he was being watched), but they’ve certainly caught glimpses of it in moments where Wars is able to relax just a little more. And I feel like maybe they’re even able to recognize that. Maybe it makes them feel a little bit sad when they realize that Wars’s flashy obnoxious grin isn’t a ‘real’ one at all, because I’m sure to an extent he probably does feel a bit happy when he’s laughing and joking around with the others but that straight, even smile is a controlled thing and not a true expression of his happiness

Now this may be completely a headcanon of mine: But I do feel like Warriors is a person who greatly values his physical space. He likes being alone (not being lonely), he likes getting to take time by himself to just breathe and appreciate what’s around him, and he doesn’t have to deal with the crushing pressure of being the person everyone thinks he is. He can smile at things and not worry about the fact his real smile isn’t perfect because no one’s watching him. He can allow himself to maybe actually be happy for a second when he’s alone because he can really just relax

IF YOU WRITE THAT FIC AND SHARE IT ANYWHERE IM ON MY HANDS AND KNEES BEGGING YOU TO SEND ME A LINK 🥺 I love the idea of him just falling asleep on the porch in a rocking chair OUGH. IM OBSESSED WITH IT.

anyways sorry for yappin, i turn into an unskippable cutscene when people mention Wars

[transpersian]

Doc 3 is about PZ's kid

And yes, that means what you think it means. We've been talking. A lot.

From my Twitter thread:

Needed some time to think.

I've been trying too hard to make too many people happy, even with contradictory needs. I've been letting people jerk me back and forth on what they think is right. I've been trying REALLY hard to be nice.

Biding my time. No more.

PZ’s kid is okay.

Back in October, after months of worrying about optics, we decided that it was too important: we had to see if Poppy’s kid was okay. They’d literally ESCAPED, ffs. They’re 23, but still.

And before anyone says anything, I WAS RIGHT. This is the first thing they said to me:

Yes, I understand the delicacy of the situation. Yes, I understand how this looks. But please understand: I’m not just some internet rando who’s in way over her head. I’ve been supporting abuse survivors in deep and intense ways for decades, and I’m damned good at it.

I’d fuck off if they had a negative response. I’d push for them not to be involved in any efforts against their mom. In the end, what ended up being our priority was making sure that The Kid (no real name plz) was okay and knew we were there if they needed help.

Fuck the optics.

I helped them clean up the tracks that led to them, then we started talking. Initially, I insisted on this being strictly for support. They wanted to get involved and I pushed back. Said if they really wanted to, they could send me screenshots, not thinking they’d apply.

Oh boy.

First they sent them to me to illustrate their points, but they insisted that I was free to use any of them. That first batch of 12 was jarring enough.

Then, unprompted, they sent me 70 more.

They want me to tell their story. They want me to show you how PZ lie.

And they’re not in a rush. They want me to be thorough.

So in a move I was barely okay with, they gave me access to their 3200-message Signal chat log so I could figure out where relevant screenshots are and have them take them.

I’m taking my time because they’re hard to read.

My mother left when I was 3. My father remarried 4 years later and she was abusive to me for the following 16 years.

I felt unwelcome in my own home, incapable of doing anything right, constantly eggshelling.

Zena makes my experiences with my stepmom look like Sesame Street.

There are little things you notice when you have texts in DB format.

Like how Poppy said “I love you” to her kid eight times from July ’21 to June ’22.

Only twice from July ’22 to June ’23.

Watching them be believed less and less over Zena, who started blatantly lying.

For the past couple of months, when I’ve been able to, I’ve been studying a way-too-intimate look at the death of a mother’s empathy for her child. I’d chat with them sometimes and give them what support I could. Figure out how to respond to ones like this:

I know I’ll only get one shot at this, so here’s what the doc will consist of:

A more complete intro about the above

Transcripts of when PZ have cited The Kid’s abuse on stream

A tally of claims to track

The screenshots

Examples of the “assignments” they were given

A 3.5-page long, single-spaced list of what they deemed unacceptable treatment, which PZ promptly wrote off as bullshit and complained to their friends about

Screenshots from those friends

Direct rebuttals against PZ’s on-stream claims

Additional context from my conversations with TK

Somehow forgot to mention a major chunk: dozens of screenshots from TK’s personal discord with a few close friends, serving essentially as a diary of their experiences. Purely testimonial on that front, I know, but…

I feel like maybe it's worth seeing what a young adult in their early 20s says to their close friends in private about in what's essentially a group chat.

See, PZ’s 23-year-old kid has POTS, a circulatory disorder that affects your body’s regulatory systems, including respiratory. Things that negatively affect POTS:

Skipping meals

Excessive physical labor

Heat

What if I told you PZ would punish them with food restriction?

What if I told you of at least three separate mentions of TK being worked to collapse or illness? That they ignored TK’s symptoms and scolded them for not just eating better? That they worked TK for 8+ hrs some days?

What if I told you that TK is 5’1” and 80 lbs (unrelated)?

What if I showed you when, on-stream, Poppy accused TK of intentionally crying so intensely that she dissociated? Or of abusing Zena?

Can you imagine being pushed so far by your parents that you're in wailing tears, and they don't stop until it reaches that point? And then they accuse you of manipulation?

If you're like me (and what I'd imagine is many members of The Foundation), you don't have to imagine it.

What if I told you that what PZ called “intentionally faking forgetting instructions” when TK was really just having a hard time?

What if I told you I knew what the mysterious psych test Poppy trotted out as proof on stream actually says? What if I told you that Poppy harassed the kid until they gave it up, even though she’s not legally entitled to any of it? Even though she’s abusing the authority of her license?

Remember how Poppy talked about having to rush to the bank to make changes to her accounts because TK withdrew all of their own trust money? What if I told you I have proof that she was talking to them as early as the next morning and TK was completely cooperating?

I’ve heard a lot of horrific testimonies about the things that Poppy has done, but this… This radicalized me.

And it’s radicalized anyone I’ve shown it to.

TK has asked me to use everything I can from them to expose @ZenaandPoppy for what they are:

Abusive Hypocrites

So ultimately, how does this incredibly personal violation of privacy factor into the big picture? Yes, I know what this is. I know what it looks like.

But these are abusive parents who have been using their platform to use their own victim for pity points. That’s how they win.

What I’ve been trying to prove is abusiveness. PZ are recklessly abusive people who hide behind victimhood (and what they used to disdainfully refer to as “idpol”).

This is extensive proof not just THAT they’re abusive liars, but also HOW.

This is what Zena is like with power.

This is a ways off. Still lots to do. But I just want everyone to finally know why I’m still in this.

I know what Poppy and Zena are. Intimately. Not because I’m a “stalker.” Because I’ve had people come to me about how PZ hurt them. 20+ of them with claims from the past year.

I can’t share all of their claims because they only have so much proof. But I believe victims. And this? This I can prove, extensively.

This is why it’s funny when people accuse me of clout-chasing: I have no online brand to care about, and if I did, this would be insane.

People have asked me what the end goal is.

My goal is COMPLETE deplatforming.

For nobody in this community to trust them with their mental health ever again.

They are justifying their abuse with therapy speak and TEACHING THEIR FANS TO DO THE SAME.

They’re dangerous.

Oh, and Zena! Zena! Yeah, right here. I know you were really sad about being left out of the abuse allegations, but trust me, there will be #noZZerasure on this one. You’re a solid 80% of this one, sweetie! How’s that monkey’s paw working out for you?

And in closing, I’m just going to give myself this one additional… treat.

If you’ve been following for a while, you know this reference.

But this one’s for the abuse mob:

You still don’t take us seriously, do you?

Or rather…

Are you taking me seriously yet?

Because you will. I promise you, you fucking will. Because you’re about to understand that this has never been for me. It’s never been about me.

It’s about making sure you two have as few avenues as possible to prey on this community ever again.

See you in school.