#but he gets one so its okay
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high masking autistic steve harrington follow on from this post
ao3
wc: 2.6k | rated: T | cw: description of a meltdown with semi aggressive stimms | tags: autistic steve harrington (and eddie and robin but this is about stevie), hurt/comfort, stobin soulmates, steddie, steve Harrington has shitty parents
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he failed. he graduated. but he failed. those unsaid words between him and his parents. some get said. the bad ones, about him, they get said. over again like heās 5 and being told is behaviour isnāt acceptable. that how he is isnāt right. āshape up or ship outā, basically. steve knows he canāt go anywhere new, not right now. only freshly recovered, physically at least. mentally; heās still unacceptable.Ā
when steve works at scoops. itās so fucking bright in there. so fucking bright, all day and he canāt focus and talking to people gets so much harder. itās not like school where he can zone out in class and turn it on during lunch, in between, keep up his face with the people around him and sink back into his head during chemistry. no. now itās all the time, customer after customer. that he has to talk to, put on a smile for, read so he gives them what they want and they leave happy. itās exhausting. girls donāt like him anymore, they donāt react to him the same way. he doesnāt think he likes them much either though because theyāre so much more annoying when itās so fucking bright.Ā
but robin (robin who cycles to work with sunglasses on and doesnāt take them off till she has too) she turns the lights down during open and close. so those couple hours, itās not so bad. not so stressful. a little bit less loud.Ā
after the mall burns down steve starts letting her in. tries too. she makes it obvious enough to him that she wants him there. she asks him to stay and calls him at night and he just wants to be enough for her. eventually heād swallowed his pride and bolstered his courage and called her after a string of nightmares. asking her to stay the night. but then she was there, and it was like everything was thrown off. she was grating on his already freyed nerves but he didnāt know what to say. how to fix it without upsetting her.Ā
but that night, a mirror of the mall bathroom played out in steves en-suite. steve had freaked. hidden. but she didnāt leave. and he tried to explain.Ā
he needs her but he doesnāt know how to have her as a true friend. āi dunno how to talk to a girl if i donāt wanna date them. i uh, maybe, donāt really know how to talk to someone as myself. as a friend. sorry.āĀ
āwell i donāt know how to talk to jocks so. same boat.ā and she has this glint in her eye. like she knows. and itās okay.Ā
because robin, she made it simple. she makes it easy. she says just ask and sheāll be honest and give him a yes or no. sheāll say if she canāt be touched right now, or if the movie he chose is pissing her the fuck off. and she wants the same from him. if the music is too loud, if she needs to let him not speak for a while. wants him honest and present and real. real friends. someone close. finally.Ā
itās rocky at first. sheās honest and heās not used to it. it feel like criticism more often than not. makes him see red and lash out, like he was never able to with his parents. but he apologises and she stays. and heās learning; thatās itās okay, heās not perfect and that means sheās knowing the real him. and sheās still his best friend even if he has to tell her to stop picking her nail polish off around him because it makes him want to die. and she laughs at him the first time she sees him in real recovery mode; hair not styled and he has on the only sweatshirt that ever feels good when heās like this.Ā
they lay on the floor in darkness and silence. itās perfect. they share a tin of soup and a grilled cheese. itās perfect.Ā
being around robin as much as he is, its so new, having someone see so many parts of you. sometimes she laughs at him asking steve āwhyād your voice change?ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½ but steve didnāt even know it had. he was, he was just talking to someone else quick, being nice like youāre supposed to, attentive to make them feel good. he didnāt know his voice changed that much.Ā
āgirls would like you more if you talked normal to them. how you do to me.āĀ
steve swallowed thickly. he just. he just doesnāt know that thats true. nancy left, he talked to her about lots of things, too many things. she like him better at the start. before some of his black tar innards spilled out. before he freaked. before he was able to paste himself back together and she saw him for what he really is.Ā
he thinks of his parents. how they donāt know him and still donāt like him. anxiety prickles at his fingertips at the thought of those times they do come home.Ā
because with them there the routine heās carved for himself, those quiet moments of darkness that he so craves. theyāre gone. now itās tv static and plates clanging and having to show his face at dinner again. but heās not ten anymore. now heās an adult whose still drowning in the tension of the room, never able to say whatās really going on, never allowed to ask how they really feel, never taught how to figure his feeling out. no listening ear for steve as a child, and the ice only grew thicker with time.Ā
itās his skin itching at his mother stirring her tea across the house, spoon agains porcelain. itās the hair on the back of his neck standing up at the sound of ice clinking in his fathers scotch glass. itās triggered memories playing over and over again. itās being plagued, by ghosts who haunt him, who left but come back every so often, like poltergeists. polietgists with the deed to the house, and ownership over steve, through blood and fear alone.Ā
āwhen they get back you come to mine steve yeah? you come home.ā
because now theres not just robin. thereās eddie.Ā
he sees everything. and more. even when steveās trying to hide. eddie sees.Ā
he noticed steve squinting at the hospital and asked the nurse to turn the lights down. he saw how he started zoning out at a diner with the kids, their arguing reaching a pitch, asked steve to keep him company for a smoke break. once they were outside eddie said he just needed a moment, āthose kids can be animalsā. said it and looked a him like he didnāt need an answer, let steve just breathe a focus on the sound of the wind.Ā
itās like thereās a million tiny moments, a million tiny cracks in him forming the more heās around eddie. like his soft underbelly is mewling any time heās around, wanting attention, wanting to let eddie see. let eddie touch.Ā
eddie used to look at him sometimes, across the lunch hall. stare at him with an expression steve couldnāt really make sense of. he used to think it was judgment, annoyance. now he wonders if that face was confusion or interest. maybe eddieās always been trying to figure steve out.Ā
once it starts. them. eddieās everywhere. more somehow, maybe, than robin because, you know, they go there. but itās different, from those time, with those girls. instead now heās there and his brains off and on in a, like, magical way. a new way that makes him feel whole and, and beautiful.Ā
this thing they have. itās fragile. itās not perfect. he messes up, takes him a moment to grasp how eddie can be so so himself, always, no matter what. especially when it causes him problems. āwhy not just try and fit in?ā but the stone faced reply told steve that was the wrong thing to say, he didnāt get it but he needed to respect it. respect eddie and his choices. āiām not like you steve, even if my brain shit was all gone iād still be poor, iād still be othered. still be a gay weirdo little freak.āĀ
and steve is trying to get it. heās learning to recognise that itās sadness and confusion in eddieās eyes when he visits him at work, knowing steve is having a bad day and watching him pretend. watching that mask form thick and fast, hiding the real him, protecting but also keeping everyone far far away. steve thinks maybe theyāre living parallels. finding different ways to survive. neither better, neither worse. both far from perfect.Ā
then that pinched sadness in eddieās eyes. watching steve pretend. cover up. that damn breaks eventually. eddie sees all of him and more. those bits he always kept locked inside. between he and himself. it all comes spilling out.Ā
they were supposed to be going out soon. but eddie wasnāt feeling it anymore āletās just stay here, be cozy a little longer. what do you say, sweetheart?ā it does sound nice. steves so tired. but they decided. they had a plan.Ā
āwe said we would. and i have to buy that thing eddie. we had a plan. and i have to go to work later, so we have to do it before. like we said and then i have to work eddie.ā and before he knows it thereās tears prickling his eyes and the ceiling fan is so loud and the desk lamp is too bright and he smacks a fist to the top of his head and it hurts a little but heās so frustrated and so overwhelmed and so confused and embarrassed, suddenly. and he canāt breath. why canāt he breath? they had a plan.Ā
they were supposed to go see hopper and pick something up and he has to talk to him and ask about the game because he needs hopper to like him because itās better when el can come when all the kids hangout. itās important that sheās happy so hopper needs to trust steve so steve was going to talk to him today and pick something up. it was the plan. hopper makes him nervous but that was the plan. and then he had to go to work. but now he canāt breathe and he feels like he needs something to hurt.Ā
ābut he already trusts you with el stevie. hop trusts you with anything.āĀ
āi canāt know that. not for sure. when i talk to him it needs to be perfect.ā steve paces. a pinch at his arm. a tug at his hair. pivot. pace. repeat.Ā
āi heard what he said to you steve, on your birthday, he was calling you son all day. you donāt need to prove anything to him.āĀ
āi do eddie! you donāt understand. people, they lie. adults lie. they donāt say things the way they mean. i canāt fuck up talking to him. not like i always fuck up talking to my parents. i need to do it better. do it differently. because everyone always leaves. and i just donāt want to be alone again.ā and the tears really start to fall and steve can barely breath and heās so embarrassed. shaking hands try and cover his face but the tears slip through.Ā
and all he can think about is the plan. going to work. his vest hanging by the door. the way the plastic tapes feel in his hands. the smell of the bleach they mop the back room with. the day stretches before him. so many things in the way. so much anxiety still to come. if he canāt start, it canāt end. he gnaws at his lip. thumps a hand to his chest, trying to breath right, trying to ground.Ā
āi have to go to workā he mutters. like a prayer. speak it in to happening. taking him away from the now. thump thump thump at his chest. ear ringing.Ā
eddieās holding his arms out, giving steve the option. he speaks so calmly, so earnest. āyou canāt go to work steve. not like this baby.ā
steve rounds on him. angry. when did everything get so messed up? if he was just left alone. he shouldāve stayed on his own. āi cant just call in sick eddie! iām not sick and and i hate the way theyāll sound when i say it over the phone and knowing what theyāll be thinking about me. theyāll know i hate the job and think iām lazy and realise how stupid and useless i am and fire me. i canāt afford to get fired eddie. iād rather just go in.ā he know it comes out garbled, his cheeks on fire.Ā
āiām not letting you go in steve. iāll sort it. iāll go pick up robin before and sheāll cover for you, sheāll explain. and she would never. ever think that of you.ā eddieās voice dropped octave. he speaks clearly and plainly and finally thereās a new plan to follow. a new rule for the day.Ā
and all steve can do is curl up in a ball and sob. curl up in a ball against eddie chest, in his arms, squeezing his t-shirt between his fingers. clenching his muscles tight, his teeth grinding together. grunting out some of the decade old scream, still stuck there but more visible to him now.Ā
until finally finally, he relaxes. spent and exhausted. too afraid to open his eyes and face the lamplight, face what could be in eddieās expression. he drifts..
eventually he gets up, blows his nose and splashed water on his face, turns off all the lights and get back under the warm blanket. fills his lungs. sighs. whispers, āmāsorryāĀ
ādonāt say that. thereās nothing to apologise forā eddieās so close, so warm.Ā
āno oneās supposed to ever, see that.. itās okay if you want to leaveāĀ
āsteve. why the fuck would i leave you right now?āĀ
āwhoād wanna date someone who acts like that? itās. itās not good eddie. but, but itās okay. iām used to being alo-.āĀ
āplease stop stevie. your breaking my heart here. i want to stay, i want to be here with you. i really really like you steve.ā and steveās cheeks feel wet again. he feels flayed open and young, like a little kid who fell off the swings and everything is different suddenly.Ā
later later when eddie picks robin up from work she stalks in to where steveās wrapped up on the couch. curls up into his side and exhales. she bites into his bicep. huffing a sad, annoyed little ādingusā before grabbing his hand and fiddling with his fingers.Ā
steve feels his eyes prickle again. looking up at the ceiling he croaks out a small āsorry.ā for the day. for everything. for anything he can be. and everything he canāt.Ā
robin kneels on the sofa right next to him. growling a little and placing one of her hands at his sternum and the other at the same height on his back. like sheās forcing herself inside him, holding him together. her hands start to rub up and down quickly, frenzied and grounding for both of them. steve letās his head hang. eyes closing at the sensation. he grunts. robin grunts back.Ā
eddie joins. sitting at his other side. slipping a hand in steveās hair, soothing his scalp with long scratching fingers. and steve humms, sighs, keens. eyes closed he drifts but not away from his body, instead into it. with gratitude, and warmth. at the centre of the two best things that ever happened to him. willing to try again. be just, better. never perfect.Ā
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pt 3 snippet
a little happier for u @pearynice <3
ty @spectrum-spectre @vampyreddiemunson @fangirlycupcake @grandwretch for ur tags and additions, it was very inspiring
and tags for lovely @irethsune @willim-billiam-byerson @2jug2head
#hope this is okay#i know the comfort isn't like loads but#unmasking is fucking hard#and hes simply doing his best#autistic steve harrington#steddie#platonic stobin#hotlunch#my fic#steve harrington needs a hug#but he gets one so its okay#feel nervous about posting this but letās fucking go my dudes#pls let me know if u like it šš
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sleep cycles
#so im getting really into the concept of how much of silver's life has been lost to sleep. um. it's delicious. awful but delicious#this poor guy. u know how the avg person u might stay up later than u should so u can rly maximize the hours? 24 isnt enough let alone 16#silver feeling every accidental nap cut that shorter and shorter. days weeks months of time built up that is gone. that he cant get back#repeating the cycle endlessly in frustration and misery and there's NOTHING he can do about it. yea#ANYWAYS im posting this on the clock but its okay we havent had a new ticket in almost an hour it should be fine#i have 2 other drawings done but tryna focus on life a bit#twst#twstćć”ć³ć¢ć¼ć#twisted wonderland#twst silver#yes there are over 20 silvers in this one post. im crazy. and?#suntails
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#disco elysium#disco elysium fanart#kim kitsuragi#harrier du bois#harry du bois#this is probably one of my fav conversations in the game...#sad that not many people get to see it(?) cause you need like 7 in empathy?#comics#comic art#trans#cw blood#blood#cw smoking#my first time making a comic i hope it looks okay lmao#ough i have so many thoughts about kim and his complicated relationship with his name#im interpreting the dialogues in a very transgender way but its definitely about his racial identity too#cause its a *seolite* name#another factor of him not being seen as a revacholian#and its one of the only things he has left of his parents too#i wonder if the name kim is seen as more masculine or feminine in seol and in other isolas?#im definitely *not* projecting haha#i read once in a fic that kim *attempted* to translate his parents' letters when he was young#10/10 fic made me cry#thats why i decided to add the seolite dictionary - i dont think kim would have *tried* to learn seolite otherwise#he definitely has some kind of internalized racism he needs to get over#sorry for rambling#my art
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New idea: Shinsou is supposed to be babysitting Eri but he has to do something so he leaves Denki in charge for a little bit, he comes back expecting the house to be burnt down but instead he finds Eri begging Kaminari to let her re-dirty up her room so they can clean it together again
#kaminari is good with kids i just know it#got this idea while listening to the Mary Poppins classic Spoonful of Sugar#he turns it into a game and she forgets its a chore#at one point he turns it into a race#āif you can clean your side of the room faster than i can clean my side ill get you icecream!ā#she excitedly starts cleaning the room and once shes super focused he stops cleaning his side#he was gonna give her ice cream anyway#when she finishes her side he goes āgreat job! now help me finish my side and we can get some icecream!ā and they both work on that side#hes a tricky guy#he may not do great in school but hes still VERY clever#then when theyre done he goes āOkay! Now we can take an ice cream break and clean the closet after!ā and she is having so much damn fun that#she begs to finish the closet FIRST#i love them#i wanna see her love him and him being a surprisingly good babysitterrr#denki kaminari#eri mha#eri my hero academia#hitoshi shinsou#mha#bnha#dadzawa#shinsou is amazed#and when Eri rants about it to mic and aizawa later they are also amazed#erasermic#shinkami
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respost separated from the og post bc I really liked this silly little thing I made
And a little extra of my own
little binghe has a goal in this life and it only gets worse once he mets sqq, no one dares to threaten his position as sqq's future wife, he literally was born to be his spouse!!
#scum villain's self saving system#svsss#sillies#bingqiu#äŗŗęø£åę“¾čŖęē³»ē»#svsss fanart#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#tianlang jun#I like to think little bunhe asked his father to let him write letters to his misterious future husband#to get to know him more before their wedding#and tlj hopeless romantic that he is of course says yes#zzl! go for a reliable mailman of the court!#so one day sqq still is on the way to become peak lord and start recieving letters apparently from tlj's child???#so weird but eeh its okay its a way to check on how the protagonist is doing!#so he displays his full autistic caring mother rizz on those letters#and binghe swoons everytime he reads his poetry#and his tales about monsters and artifacts and some weird stories sqq makes up for him#(he is telling him about anime)#idiots in love#binghe thinks they are courting from distance#sy thinks he has a very adorable pen pal#sxy is in the corner probably keeping an eye on everthing to be sure her son is safe#tlj is living this arranged marriage like a telenovela
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idea!
more in op tags for those that see this post reblogged (unless reblogger included the ideatags)
#alan becker#animator vs animation#ava#ava tco#ava the chosen one#ava tsc#ava the second coming#ava yellow#OKAY tagsplaining time#so basically my idea was that tco was unaware that he was in rocketcorp#and also unaware that hes being watched and/or kept an eye on via the box#victim purposefully made sure chosen doesnt see the box's door open#keeping chosen unaware of whats outside or the fact he could escape at any moment if he was quick enough to run through that door#(even though hed most likely get paused again before he could go anywhere else)#because if chosen knew there was a way to get out it was most likely that he would just. want to leave and not cooperate more#but since he DOESNT know... sure he still wants to leave but to him there is seemingly no way out and the only other thing there is victim#sure the box door opened when victim got the memory scanner but then again tcos face was on the floor or something (view the box 12:45)#so he wouldnt be able to see that#hed hear something yeah but the box's door barely makes a noise so its prooobably unlikely tco would think that a door just opened#this idea is so so fun teeheehee#lilacsart
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Thinkingā¦
#mostly thinking a daemon au is the perfect opportunity to make buck the loneliest man on earth because he just doesnt have one#no physical manifestation of the soul. what a freak#heād be truly pretty feral by the time he got to the 118 i think#no idea why hes like this. thinks hes just super broken. and the rest of the world seems to agree#(of course it was the buckleys doing some sketchy as hell shit to try to save daniel but i think Maddie doesnt even know that here)#anyway eddieās soul absolutely adores him so its okay. its getting better#my art#daemon au
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in honor of our first byler set leaks and pride month
i present to you: the romantic goth byler i was yapping abt
#this is my version of happy byler#its the most lighthearted im gonna get guys#sorry#i find beauty in the darkness#omg im so edgy#joke#i love horror romance or whatever you call this#hes fine btw#BEFORE YALL START CRYING#HES GONNA BE OKAY#hes just taking control of the UD/vecnaās army by using vecnaās vines!!#yk the ones he gets attached to in the creel house in the UD#its a theory me and crud (iykyk) made up last year and i think its rlly cool#byler#stranger things#will byers#mike wheeler#byler fanart#stranger things fanart#fanart#will byers fanart#mike wheeler fanart#stranger things 5#st5#st5 speculation#romantic goth#irisart!!!
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Kenji Sato + nervous habits ā finger tapping & leg bouncing
#sorry for overanalyzing a fictional character's mannerisms in an animated kid's film. do you still think im sexy#ultraman rising#ultraman: rising#also fingernail biting i guess but he only does that ONCE so im not calling it a habit#kenji sato#ken sato#mine#i do fear this makes me a freak#i just love the attention to detail that the animators put into this okay#the last one is crazy subtle & the camera moving makes it even harder to see but its there i swear on my life#omg quality assassination. ill get you tumblr#ultraman
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Ray of sunshine
(pre-launch page for their comic)
#I can not wait to make this comic#I have to stop thinking about it or else I cant focus#every time I start thinking about it I get all jittery. I wanna make it so fucking bad its unreal#hope to GOD I can do it full time omfg#I'll need like 500 people on my patreon paying to read ahead. ish. minimum. which is scary ahgkjsahgkjagh#but! I'll be able to put that on patreon! I cant do that right now. so thats cool!!!#just a lot of people AJGLKJGLKJASLKGGA#like it has to do well or I'm gonna have to get a different job#cause. I am NOT working for webtoon again#I cant do it they are killing me#and I'm not getting paid enough for it#I pitched this comic btw and they said they liked it but they wanted me to simplify the plot.#cause it was 'too complicated'#its literally just like. a murder mystery + a romance + a fetch quest#like its extremely not that complicated lmfao#they thought that people wouldnt be able to follow cause theres too much going on.#and I am not interested in simplifying my stories to this extent. I respect my readers and I trust they can follow plots#just. omfg I'm doing it again!!!#I cant start talking about webtoon without going off again!!!#they PISH ME OFF ! HAHAHAHAH#okay. anyways. I have to get back to work now this took me longer than I expected#like 4 hours#I'm enjoying this new illustration style I've been doing though. its fun.#its like 1 layer and then a ton of effects HAHAHAH#we were legion#zagan and luciel#zagan#luciel#how did I make zagan so hot... I'm a genius...#if he isnt hot then no one would put up with his behavior at the start of the ccomic HAHAHAHA
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How's that possible? Since when did you start eating spicy food? I told you I'd do it for real next time. ...Don't touch me, orāI'll kill you!
KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 12
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#uservid#userspicy#userrain#userspring#pdribs#userjjessi#*cajedit#*gif#chen yi is really sitting there the whole time with only one thought in his mind and it is: i am gonna kiss this man. and then he does!!#okay but heres where i gotta get analytical about it bc ppl will say blah blah theyre so good at miscommunication and im sorry but NO#THEY ARE THE OPPOSITE. when ai di runs away at the end of ep10 after chen yi says he's figured it out and next time he'll do it for real-#chen yi does not seek ai di out Once after that nor does he try to force him into any admissions. HONESTLY HE DOESNT SINCE THE EP10 BAR#he LETS AI DI COME TO HIM EVERY. TIME. he lies a little to keep ai di from running but he doesnt ever actually force ai di to return to him#any time AFTER he CONFIRMS ai di has real feelings for him-which he does during the bar scene. there was no miscommunication there#it was only listening and observing. and chen yi doesnt push farther than offering gifts or that little lie because he wants ai di -#All of ai di. the truest parts of ai di.... he wants the REAL AI DI the one he knows and loves - to come to him of his own volition#in Whatever Form That May Be. because he loves him!! & in this case the form is in torture and accusations bc chen yi's lie has been caught#but chen yi is nothing less than DELIGHTED. bc AI DI STILL CAME. its further proof of ai di's feelings for him and chen yi loves it#& now it's chen yi's turn to show ai di all the ways in which he loves and belongs to him. its time to play his hand after waiting so long
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the only reason Tim Drake and Damian Wayne don't get along is because if they did the writers wouldn't be able to come up with a plot contrived enough for them to struggle with.
they would be the ultimate team if they could just work smoothly together.
but they cant so balance is restored to the world i guess.
#batfam#batfamily#batman#dc robin#tim drake#damian wayne#tim drake wayne#they would be unstoppable#they would be feared#they would enable each other#the only thing stopping them from taking over the world is the fact that Tim is too lazy to run everything and B would be dissapointed#tim drake is so underrated and deserves to be a menace#damian wayne has so much potential and people write himi off as 'angsty' and a 'brat' so easily#okay he is a bit of a brat but like he is 10#have you ever met a 10 year old?#let alone one brought up in a assassin ninja cult where you kill or be killed#he is growing and getting better leave him alone#its called character development#this is just a bit of fun lmao#tim drake is my favourite damaged genius - sherlock sit down you superpowered mf
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canāt talk about it
[ID: Black and white comic of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. The comic starts with the sounds "thud, thud, click". Vash, mid-action of peeling an apple, turns to the sound, noticing who it was that entered, and says, "Oh, Wolfwood, you're back." He resumes back to his apple in the next panel as he speaks, "Where'd you go? You snuck out of bed quickly this morning..." Wolfwood's hand then enters the panel, hovering over Vash's cheek and Vash looks up as Wolfwood asks, "Can I?" Vash responds, "Not going to talk about it?" while using a hand to gently hold Wolfwood's hovering hand and presses a kiss to his inner palm.
Vash then gets up fully, setting down the knife down on the table and the apple onto a plate, He leans into Wolfwood as Wolfwood explains, "Had to meet someone. Nothing interesting to talk about." Vash kisses Wolfwood's left cheek and a hand moves to cup his other cheek while muttering, "You're being vague." Wolfwood says neutrally, "If yer really that curious, keep askin'. We Ā can talk about that instead of doing this." Vash leans back and responds, "Let's talk after, since... You look so tired."
The panel pans to a close up of Wolfwood's downcast eyes, bags heavy underneath his eyes. He doesn't allow Vash to sit in that moment for long though, then saying, "Yer not helping, Spikey. Being all slow with it... I could fall asleep right now." He moves his hand to start unclasping Vash's coat, starting from his collar. Vash with red cheeks, responds briskly, "Oh, shut up. I'm worried about you. I can't be worried?"
The final shot shows Wolfwood's back to the viewer while Vash's softened expression can be seen as he holds gently onto the side of Wolfwood's face and a hand firm on his waist. Wolfwood responds, "I'm fine, seriously," pausing for a moment before continuing, "Is it okay to still..?" Vash responds, "Yeah, it's okay."
The next image is a shot from later that night after the previous comic. Vash and Wolfwood are now in bed, half naked. Wolfwood's buries his face into Vash's chest, his arms wrapped around him, while Vash is petting at his hair. Vash reminds him, "Hey. You said we'd talk about it." Wolfwood pauses for a moment before piping up, "In the morning? I'm sleepy." Vash says, "Okay..."
The next two pages start from the morning after. Wolfwood is already fully awake, pulling on his outer jacket as he says to Vash, whos' still bundled in his blankets, "Breakfast is on the table. Make sure to eat it. I'm going to grab some things in town and then we're leavin'. Got it?" Vash says, "Mh." Wolfwood responds, "Good. See ya in a bit." The dialogue starts to shift into Vash's inner thoughts now, as he gets up and eats toast, thinking, "Wait. Weren't we supposed to... talk about it?" The next shot then shows him fully up, meeting Wolfwood in town. He carries a half worried expression with him while Wolfwood slides on his glasses for him. A quick panel shows Wolfwood's tired expression from the night before and quickly juxtaposes with Wolfwood in front of him who's smiling gently, the shades covering his eye bags. Wolfwood asks him, "Still not awake yet?" Vash pauses, his thoughts stirring, thinking, "Oh. I guess I was getting ahead of myself... thinking you owe me that kind of honesty." He smiles at Wolfwood and responds, "I'm awake!" His thoughts continue, "Maybe one day, you'd trust me enough to share your burdens."
The final image shows Wolfwood pulling at Vash's cheek and Vash complains, "Owwwww why..." Wolfwood quickly says, "You were thinking something stupid, right? It's all over yer face." Vash mutters, "Nooo, I wasn't..." END ID]
#vashwood#trigun#trigun maximum#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#Theyre both thoroughly exhausted tired individuals -- vash having to fight this lonely battle for over a hundred years and getting dragged#back into inevitable situation with knives after a 2 years hiatus of being a gunslinger. they both need so much Rest and comfort in this#department... .SIGHS. BUT I JUST THINK ABOUT WOLFWOOD . AND HOW... LITTLE He has existed on no man's land. how majority of his years being#alive is being used as a weapon and to kill when him at his very core is the most giving and selfless individual ever#badlands rumble inspired me a bit but i do think wolfwood gets dragged into occasional tasks from the eye of michael while on his duty of#guiding vash -- or i think that one chapter where we got to see other members of eom -- there's like a clear division within the eom too#i think.... so i figured similarly to vash but not to the same amount -- there are people that look for wolfwood too. but most of the time#it's probably wolfwood that has to look for someone else and take them out. i feel like it happens ever so occasionally.#evidentially these two don't talk enough canonically but they always know how to express things properly to affirm that they're okay#they have the worst time ever sharing burdens - can't willingly burden the other and has neeever asked for help or reprieve in their#desperate situations... vw is a huge case of right person wrong time syndrome so they just. in the time they get to spend together -- even#if romantically - they don't have enough time to heal to get over that kind of hurdle. They've just never asked for help in all the years#they've been alive -- they don't even know how to and its just aughhhsgskg#and well! they don't even need to ask! because they'll be there for each other anyway at the end of the day -- company and presence alone.#ruporas art
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finally giving fem danyal her own au and fulfilling my 'danny is an animal whisperer' agenda at the same time: mother of monsters danyal 2.0
i say "2.0" because TECHNICALLY 'mother of monsters danyal' is an au I made back in June for Dark fem!Danyal (who I promptly named Layal). However, I haven't posted much for her yet, and I like the "mother of monsters" premise too much to leave it only to Layal. Plus Danyal in that au was going to become the mother of monsters anyway, just with significantly less world domination and mass extinction.
'Animal whisperer' Danny has been something I've been thinking about since my latest DP 'wolfpack au' post and it's! So fun to think about, and who no better to assign the idea to than Danyal Al Ghul? Who comes from a family infamously known for their love of animals and nature?
Fem Danyal is just purely self-indulgent. *gestures wildly at her* i just lomvb,,, her,,,, I've only really mentioned her in context of the 'Things in Threes' au/my first Danyal al Ghul au with the facial scar, but she's!!! I love her. She deserves her own au <33
So kill three birds with one stone! Make a post about it.
Anyways, Danny has a large lair. Similar to cult leader danyal, her lair is a giant mountain region resembling nanda parbat with a big temple/palace-like area built into the mountain. It's large, it's overflowing with natural flora, with its own mini-floating islands hovering over some areas, and it's also completely empty.
Danny takes one look at her lair upon first meeting, -- noting that it looked relatively smaller from the outside -- and promptly, with the elegance of an Al Ghul, goes "What the hell??" Because yes, while she does enjoy her own solitude and privacy, this is a bit ridiculous.
For heaven's sake, there's even a massive lake in there! What's she going to do with all this space? Can she make it any smaller? Why is it so big in the first place? This looks borderline like one of the mega-islands!
She finds out later that apparently, the amount of ectoplasm a ghost has can have an effect on the size of their lair. And since she has such a large core, her lair reflects that. Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff, it's bigger on the inside so it doesn't take up "too much space" on the outside. Don't worry about it too much.
Danyal isn't totally opposed to having such a large lair, she's just... a bit baffled by it. It feels like so much wasted space is all. All this flora and no fauna to enjoy it with. It's practically eerie.
She decorates her temple-palace area, transforming rooms to match her needs as she sees fit. In the center of the inner gardens is a massive tree that she likes to climb, with twisting, winding branches. Sam and Tucker have honorary rooms, even if they can't safely leave the specter speeder for long periods of time, even with proper safety equipment. So does Jazz. Ali (Dani) has one too, but he can actually use that one, and Danny brought him to her lair so he could decorate it himself.
She has a personal garden, but for the most part she lets the flora exist as it is. Too much space to cultivate it en masse anyways.
Skip to a few weeks later, on her next visit to Clockwork. She developed a habit of going to see him semi-regularly just because. She enjoys his wisdom, and he has a lot of stories to tell, and when he's not being the cryptic and esoteric timekeeper, he's a bit goofy.
(pushing my dadwork agenda here,,, i think Danny deserves to go 'hey, Lord Clockwork, do you want me to buy you something' while she's at walmart, only to receive a singular glowing sticky note that says 'cucumber gatorade'.)
(She insists on referring to him with his proper titles even for the most mundane of things because it's proper, but Clockwork sees a future where she eventually calls him "Cee" and by all things in existence is he determined to get there. Anyways,,,)
On her next visit to Clockwork, just as she is about to leave, Clockwork stops her and goes; "Ah, I have something for you. Hold out your hands."
Danny does as such, and Clockwork doesn't give out things often, so her curiosity has spiked to the highest levels. He turns away from her for a moment, using his staff to summon whatever it is he needs, and when he turns around.
He drops a fish into her hands. Granted, a fish in a small glass tank. But a fish nonetheless. A small one, roughly about the size of her finger, with a blue-black, eel-shaped body and four sets of glowing eyes. She can see thin, almost translucent, but spiny fins down its back and the start of bioluminescent markings. It's swimming around in circles in its small container.
"Lord Clockwork." Danyal says all too calmly.
"Yes, Danyal?"
"What is this?"
"That is an adolescent leviathan, Danyal." Sheās transfixed onto the tank, but she doesnāt need to see Clockworkās face to hear the smile heās stifling.
The myriad of emotions that runs through her all at once threatens to overwhelm her, and she canāt tell if the feelings are negative or positive. So she carefully closes her eyes to breathe in through her nose.
āClockwork.ā
āAh, I see youāve dropped formalities.ā
She ignores that.
āWhy have you given me an adolescent leviathan?ā
She's expecting the trickster to look amused when she opens her eyes. Instead, he just looks endeared. "I know you're fond of animals," he says, "and you always look amazed when you come across an animal of the realms. So I thought you might enjoy taking care of the young beast, it's mother is dead so it has no one to care for it."
Oh.
"But, if you don't like it," Clockwork's hands reach out for the tank, "I can simply take it back--"
Danyal shifts the tank out from his reach and hugs it possessively. "I never said that. How do I care for it?"
And so clockwork gives her a list, and when Danyal returns to her lair, she sets up a large tank in her room for the leviathan to swim in -- it's much too small for the lake right now, she thinks. She'll feel better if it's somewhere she can find it. She names him SuhÄ.
SuhÄ grows quickly, and by the end of the mortal month she transforms one of the rooms into a large pond for him to swim around in. He's a very loyal beast, recognizing her as it's mother of some kind. Danyal takes great care ensuring that her beastie gets quality care, and SuhÄ swims to the surface to see her when he senses her in the room.
It spirals from there. Somehow, Pandora catches wind that Clockwork gave her a leviathan, and so the next time Danyal visits the Greater Athens, she gives her a baby chimera. It's eyes are still sealed shut, Danyal can't bring herself to say no. She names the little beastie Firas.
Frostbite hears about it too, and not to be outdone, gives her an animal she's never even heard of. Infinite-realms born, apparently. A fox-like creature with two small horns like an impala, four eyes, and tall legs. The name isn't something she's quite sure how to write down, and she's positive that her friends won't be able to comprehend it. She names her Eira.
Getting the three of them used to each other was... interesting. SuhÄ tried to eat Firas when Danyal first introduced the two, and they've hated each other ever since. Firas and Eira are seemingly getting along. Her island already feels full enough with the three of them on it.
Of course, that's not the end of it. With her luck, she begins stumbling across other monsters. Realms-borne or otherwise. An injured hydra in the Grecian islands that, through lots of trial and error, Danyal is able to rehabilitate and heal. It routinely comes to visit her afterwards.
A griffin with a broken wing that she moves permanently to the island that likes to keep to itself, but tends to come down when she's near. It gets along best with Firas.
A panther-like monster from the Shades Woods that had six legs and three tails, with ends that reminded her of a venus flytrap. It stuck around the heavy foliage and she can only make out where it was when she saw its golden eyes reflect.
She befriends a young indrik with its leg injured, and much like the hydra it follows her back to her island, and stays there in the mountains. It comes out when she's alone, much like her other beasts.
She receives two more leviathan -- one from clockwork, and one she finds herself while exploring the deeper and darker recesses of the Ghost Zone. It was huddled against the carcass of its mother, and she managed to befriend and get close enough to it to bring it back to her island. SuhÄ is fully grown by then, with a head bigger than Danyal herself and he still likes to stick her head out of the water for nuzzles when she's near.
He's not very happy with his new siblings, but he's not trying to eat them when she's not looking. So she calls it a win in her book.
And it's not just large beasts either; smaller animals begin popping up when she's not looking. Bird-like creatures and small mammals, and she swears she saw a doe (or something resembling a doe) grazing in the forest while she was walking by.
She takes back with her a lone snake egg once, and it grows so big it wraps around her island and sleeps with its massive head on the mountain beside the temple, like some smaller breed of Jƶrmungandr.
And on and on it goes. Some of the beasts she comes across never step foot onto her island, some of them follow her back, while others she has to carry back. Not all of the ones that follow her stay, and Danny rehabilitates the injured and releases them when they're fully healed.
It's hectic, and busy, and frankly she loves it. Some of her rehabilitated beasts return to visit her, or to have their children somewhere on the island, or whatever it is they need to do.
She becomes a bit infamous for it. She goes to visit Dorathea once, and as she's walking through the streets she can hear some of the denizens whispering while she walks past.
"Is that her?"
"Her highness' friend? Yes--"
"--that's the one--"
"--Mother of monsters--"
Danny's not sure how to feel about that.
Although, she can't say she's opposed.
Danyal Al Ghul, Mother of monsters, raiser of beasts. It has a nice ring to it.
#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#danyal al ghul au#dpxdc prompt#fem danny fenton#fem danyal al ghul#mother of monsters danny#if anyone wants to hear about Layal specifically I'd be HAPPY to tell you about her. she's inspired by the song 'scylla' from epic#you can't leave me with dark danny for too long i give him depth if i do. anyways i gave layal mommy issues. she has a complicated view on#danyal and both loves and hates her in equal measure. she killed her out of mercy. she's her mother her sister her other half.#she despises her. she misses her. she'll never see her again. she sees her every time she looks in the mirror. she's 24. she's 10 years old#can you tell that i made layal during a time where i was thinking about the 'dan is danny's kid' dpdc trope bc that's exactly what happened#*holds dad!clockwork up like potato.* 'i just think he's neat :)'#i am incapable of making things only cracky. i must make it meaningful in some way or another.#MMMM i have to cut it off here before it gets too looooNNGGG.#if this flops i'll be sad :((#i just think the idea that danyal has her own little world on her island is neat. she's got dragons and wyrms and serpents and giant wolves#and griffins and one time there's a sphinx although she doesn't stay permanently. Danyal has a blast answering her riddles though.#that panther is based off the dnd displacer beast. there's little salamanders and gazelles with three eyes. there's more sea monsters than#just suhÄ and the other two leviathans but i couldnt think of any. im obsessed with the sea serpents if you havent notice LMFAO.#there's pegasi and a manticore and a ton of infinite realms monsters that are just an assortment of animals slapped together#the shades woods are a mega-island idea that i had. they're where a bunch of the āshades ghostsā are from. Its this large forest area with#megaflora trees similar to the redwood forest with canopies so thick and wide that no light can reach the bottom. so all of the native faun#living there have adapted to live in the shadows. there are a few villages that live in tall tree houses like the ewok villages that outsid#ghosts can go visit. the panther that's from there is very fond of danyal honestly. anyways yEAH ANIMAL WHISPERER DANNY.#her beasties are all animals up until she's like. 19. where she promptly steals an infant minotaur from a Legends Islands near Pandora#he wasn't being treated well okay!!! she couldn't stand by and watch. his name is asterion. he's a year old. and she'll kill for him.#i dont have enough tags to talk about Damian or her family >:T. just know that i am leaning into her assassin bg as usual :)
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It's looking like there's a growing divide between Campaign watchers and Tlovm watchers in terms of like. We're here for the characters. 12-episode seasons aren't. They can't be. I'm already making peace with everything we'll lose in the Mighty Nein show, and I know I will enjoy it for what it is but I also know that almost nothing that made the story so special will translate to the screen, because turning it into a show automatically means (in this day and age) that plot must be the number one priority. They've already come out and told us it's going to be different, the characters we know and love but new stories.
Because that's how this has to work. And I feel bad for campaign one lovers, because while it is certainly the easier of the two to translate to a big, overarching story, even though it's a more "traditional" high fantasy story with easier archetypal characters, the archetypes and the plot aren't what cemented most people's love for the campaign. So much of the love for critical role is stored in the interpersonal dynamics and the payoff that comes from hundreds of hours of tiny interactions that one day become cornerstones of development and even affect or dictate the plot.
There's no room for that. There's no room for Bard's Lament in a story that cannot afford to remove and replace a main character. A lot of tlovm is for people who have been here for all of campaign one. Most of it, however, isn't. It's for a new crowd. While CR may have creative control, you can bet your ass that there were months and years devoted to figuring out how to map a character-focused love of the show into a plot that hits the right beats to be viable in the show market.
And it worked. Tlovm has consistently high viewing numbers, and its popularity has brought and will continue to bring new people into the universe who have never interacted with CR previously. That's not a bad thing - imagine finishing your favorite show and discovering it has another FIVE HUNDRED HOURS of the equivalent of behind the scenes content. That's incredible for these newcomers. But man, it is in many ways a loss for us.
#Tlovm spoilers#In some ways it's like looking into a dark mirror#And this is again with a story that's relatively easy to plot with clear arcs and themes#The mighty Nein was a sandbox that was entirely character driven in terms of where they went and what they did#It has a few loose arcs but even the fact that molly died so early#The fact that he haunts the remainder of the show#That's going to be lost. Its impact on Yasha and on beau who spends the rest of the campaign looking for a chance to do what he did#The fact that his death tied narratively into Caleb getting the spell for their hut - their home - and nearly crying#Knowing he had a way to keep them safe after they lost one#None of that is plottable#I'm losing my thread of thought and I have to work but. I don't even know if sad is the right word#Because CR has gotten so far. So much further than anything of its kind.#There is much joy here and I will adore seeing the Nein#But it's okay to acknowledge that capitalism strips away the ability to focus on the heart of critical role#And that's why the live play media is so special#That's literally what makes it special and what makes the story so impactful#Critical role
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a what if
paralleling this
#alan becker#animator vs animation#ava#ava the chosen one#ava tco#ava the second coming#ava tsc#ive had this thought for a good while now and finally had time to actually make it#i like to call the āholding hands and then start to glow and. um. do something with your powersā as āconnectingā#āconnectingā with another animatormade-sticks with the same animator code can give you a bit of a powerboost#ive mentioned this in an au-post but for those that havent seen it (its another hc i have.btw)#animator codes are basically codes that are linked to a specific animator#like...for example. victim tco dark and tsc all have the same animator code since they were all drawn by alan#OKAY BACK TO THE THEORIZING#when tsc and tco āconnectā then its a special case#since theyre linked in the sense that tsc is āthe chosen one's returnā#when they āconnectā not only do they get a powerboost but they also awaken in the sense that theyre able to access every bit of their power#tco already does that (kinda? i dunno) so tsc is affected by this awakening powerboost the most#sure. tsc already awakened before in showdown but he couldnt remember it then#but noow with this āconnectionā tsc is fully conscious. soooooooooo#i think ive ran out of theorizing wordings juices ohlird the effects are starting#lilacsart
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