#but I WAS the problem! who couldve guessed!

[ej-artyarts]

Day 6 - VIDEO GAME

"I'm gonna tell you something you don't want to hear. I'm gonna show you where it's dark, but have no fear." — NIGHTCALL - Kavinsky

[anna-scribbles]

they should've been at the club(infertility treatment centers)

[lord-squiggletits]

One of my favorite parts of phase 2 (and indeed one of the few moments I resonated with IDW Prowl) was when the neutrals were coming back to Cybertron and Prowl said that he refused to let Autobots be pushed aside and overruled after they were the ones who fought for freedom for 4 million years (the exact wording escapes me atm).

And I mean, that resentment still holds true even once the colonists come on bc like. As much as it's true that Cybertron's culture is fucked up, and as funny as it can be to paint Cybertronians as a bunch of weirdos who consider trying to kill someone as a common greeting not important enough to hold a grudge over.... The colonists POV kind of pissed me off a lot of times, as did the narrative tone/implications that Cybertronians are forever warlike and doomed to die by their own hands bc it just strikes me as an extremely judgemental and unsympathetic way to deal with a huge group of people with massive war PTSD and political/social tensions that were rampant even before the war?

Like, imagine living in a society rife with bigotry and discrimination where you get locked into certain occupations and social strata based on how you were born. The political tension is so bad there's a string of assassinations of politicians and leaders. The whole planet erupts into an outright war that leads (even unintentionally) to famine and chemical/biological warfare that destroys your planet. Both sides of the war are so entrenched in their pre-war sides and resentment for each other that this war lasts 4 million years and you don't even have a home planet any more. Then your home planet gets restored and a bunch of sheltered fucks come home and go "ewww why are you so violent?? You're a bunch of freaks just go live in the wilderness so that our home can belong to The Pure People Who Weren't Stupid And Evil Enough To Be Trapped In War" and then a bunch of colonists from places that know nothing about your history go "lol you people are so weird?? 🤣🤣 I don't get why y'all are fighting can't you just like, stop??? Oh okay you people are just fucked up and evil and stupid then" ((their planets are based on colonialism where their Primes wiped out the native populations btw whereas the Autobots and OP in particular fought to save organics. But that never gets brought up as a point in their favor)) as if the damage of a lifetime of war and a society that was broken even before the war can just magically go away now that the war is over.

Prowl fucking sucks but he was basically the only person that pointed out the injustice of that.

And then from then on out most of the characters from other colonies like Caminus and wherever else are going "i fucking hate you and your conflicts" w/ people like literal-nobody Slide and various Camiens getting to just sit there lecturing Optimus about how Cybertronians are too violent for their own good and how their conflicts are stupid, with only brief sympathetic moments where the Cybertronians get to be recognized as their own ppl who deserve sympathy before going right back to being lambasted.

Like I literally struggled to enjoy the story at multiple points because there was only so much I could take of the characters I knew and loved being raked over coals constantly while barely getting to defend themselves or be defended by the narrative so like. It was just fucking depressing and a little infuriating to read exRID/OP

[violasmirabiles]

what IS it about doctors appointments and such being so fucking DRAINING. the doctor was nice and i got my prescriptions renewed just fine everything went fine and now im like. ive got no energy left and also i kinda feel like crying. all because i told them that yes i am in fact depressed and yes it is in fact exhausting.

[my-thirteenth-reason]

kicking my feet and giggling (<- just got apologised to)

[angustully]

so when does my relationship with my dad stop being so fucking fraught. oh never? not til one of us dies? oh we both have to kill each other to satisfy the themes and motifs. whatever

[catmask]

your Laila’s comet character quiz was actually so great? I love the way your questions were worded. They were so clear and descriptive that I was never confused as to what I they meant or what answer I should pick. A lot of uquizzes have questions like “pick a song” or “which photo are you”, which I just find confusing; am I supposed to pick based on preference, how well they represent me, or something else? but your questions were clear and I loved that!!! and there weren’t too many, and they all visibly had some sort of meaning that didn’t seem arbitrary in the slightest! goddd and the result section was so well-written too!! I got algernon and now I can’t wait to meet them because I already relate quite a bit. not one-to-one but a lot closer than most quizzes get to accurate!!! there isn’t a point to this I just thought your quiz was, like, remarkably well-made

thank you so much!!! ahghgg yhis sort of thing makes me happy to hear. i have this same problem with quizzes ive taken before too so, i wanted to try to remedy something while also using it as a chance for character study.

obviously you guys cant see it on your end, but theres actually no single answer thats only one character. for example - i saw someone say they thought laika wouldve picked the action figure, but thats not actually true! two characters who werent laika would pick the action figure.

i think part of writing a good character exploration AND quiz is realizing that peoples choices change if slight variations of our lives were to occurr. that someone who might turn left today couldve turned right if something different had happened. or sometimes they might just be interested in exploring another part of themself.

i guess in this way id encourage people to take the quiz more than once, because even a small change in answers will yield a different result. but thats because every laikas character overlaps at the corners, just like real people do. none of us are as different as we think, but we're not all the same either.

[billkaulitzwife]

The Outsiders Coping With a Breakup

(ps guys im not over it leave me alone(i also watched the notebook and i hate myself))

Ponyboy

Reading or writing.

How could you ever hurt this little freshman boy he‘s such a sweetheart

He would probably silently cry into a pillow until he thought his lungs were about to collapse or cave in

if this was now … he‘d chain smoke and listen to lana del rey while looking out a moonlit window

he definitely listens to Elvis to get over it.

I don’t know what exactly he would read to get over it but probably some sad ass Edgar Allan Poe. Annabelle Lee lookin ass.

He‘d write the most heart breaking

tear dripping

heavy breathing sad poetry ever.

show him a romance novel.

he’d never stop reading them until he got over it.

just the bare thought of it drives him nuts.

so he reads.

Johnny

if you hurt this man he would probably hurt himself.

he would dream bout it and wake up in cold sweats, tears running down his face.

in all honesty

i think he‘d be artistic with it

he’d somehow turn each and every single tiny thought into something about you

whether it be thinking about a teddy bear then contorting it into nothing but an image of you and him.

he would never be able to look at the places you went together the same.

he would be an artist.

hand him a pencil and he’ll make your heart break and ache.

might etch and sketch on himself to see if you still care.

ps you obviously do.

Dallas

Doesn’t know how.

All this man does is sleep, drink, fuck, repeat.

being honest this manwhore is probably gonna screw every hoe in Tulsa to try and get his mind off of it,

but every path leads back to what he knows best.

he would smoke more,

party more,

drink away all his problems, etc before facing a problem head on.

people may see him as this

uhh

violent gang member hoodlum kid guy man

but deep down hes really just a kid who wishes he couldve given his momma one more hug

a kid that needed to be loved.

a kid that was never taught how to be loved.

Adelaide

crier.

she’s a big ol’ crier, but it doesnt matter since thats not the only way she copes.

she loves to paint and puts every emotion into her paintings.

she may’ve become a kleptomaniac since she needs the supplies.

the curtis boys would

PERSONALLY

kill you if anything happened to her

one heartbreak and shes done for

love? whats that? it isnt real?

dont hurt her no matter what.

she would also turn to cigarettessss (as if she doesnt smoke enough).

adelaide would develop stage five lung cancer before even admitting that love could in the slightest exist anymore.

Sodapop

working.

soda seems like the kinda guy to go through a breakup and cry a lot

but the only thing that really helped was work.

he’d probably get a raise

yk with how hard and how much he’d be working to get over it.

his siblings would warn him about not overworkimg himself

and guess what.

he didnt listen and got really sick from all the stress.

i know for a fact he would keep away from cigarettes even if someone said they help and he believed it

he would only ever listen to the radio

hoping and praying that when he’d hear a love song he‘d hear your voice

Darrell

probably the most sane of everybody while dealing with his bs

he wld obviously be heart broken

but not to the point he needed some insane coping mechanism.

he would probably meditate.

i mean this is the sixties cmon he’s either gonna do wxxd

or meditate.

as soon as a thought of you came up and his mind started to panic he would sit on the couch and

well.

relax.

he probably has the healthiest coping mechanism he’s definitely got his life together

the others are jealous as fuuuuck

Steve

bro wouldnt eat.

every time he thought about the breakup

he thought it was because he was strong enough

or that he was too chubby for his girl.

one time he passed out while on the way to work and the gang freaked out so bad

they couldnt take him to the hospital so they carried him home and stuck a juice box in his mouth

eventually his ass woke up and they all cheered like the war had just ended “HIP HOORAY!”

but then in all seriousness

he needed to get his weight back up so the curtis kids make him eat at their house

even if he says he ate.

theres always snacks for him laying around thay house from then on out

Two-Bit

drinking.

do i have to explain.

in the novel pony said two-bit was famous for shoplifting and his black-handled switchblade…

but for some reason i know he wouldnt shoplift any more.

(he sure did teach adelaide how to tho)

along with his love for “shopping” you gotta remember he’s a heavy alcoholic

he’d drink away all of his problems and thoughts until he blacked out.

his buddies would think its just your average keith

but in all reality he’s really struggling

even though he seems like the usual drunk happy joking guy

HE IS HURTTT.

okay thanks for watching todays vlog

if u ever need to vent please dont be scared to message me bruv im sure Ik how to help.

[thatdeadaquarius]

This is riding off the language stuff in sagau but I just cant get it out of my head a reader who uses tumblr slang every once in a while. like they meet the Traveller and they're like "Omg I'm so cheesed to meet you!!" And the Traveller is just like "???" meanwhile Paimon integrates that into her vocabulary. And then maybe at some point, if the reader has a vision they're like "MAIMING AND BITING YOU" "THAT'S IT! I'M SENDING YOU TO EEBY DEEBY!" while their poor teammates are so confused. Just imagine going over to ppl like Razor, Klee, Chongyun and going "Awwww my lil scrunglos"

Just a very chaotic reader in general lmao

HEY WASSUP ANON

MY BRO THIS IS SO OLD BY NOW IM SO SORRY LMAO- SO ANYWAY HELLO!!! A DESSERT FOR UR PATIENCE 🍨🍧🛐

FOR WAITING SO LONG HERE IS SUM ASS WRITINF MY FRIEND HOPE U GET SMTH OUTTA IT

Bro imma be honest i missed out on some slang on tumblr bc i was off of it for awhile before i refreshed this old blog 

So my reaction to these slang words (except for scrunglies/scrunglos ik that one) is just as confused but also its rlly funny that im in the same situation as them LMAO 😭

☆

I would think honestly, even if ur doin it on purpose, 

I feel like some slang or refs r too ingrained into my soul to not make

So i would just accidentally use slang/memes, esp around funny ppl like Kaeya or Beidou, and then just give up eventually 💀

♤

So i stg everytime Xiao shows up in a event or smth it surprises me everytime lol

With his teleporting ability i would guess that if ur just chillin around Liyue anytime, Xiao just… shows up lol

Tea with Zhongli? Oh jesus Xiao’s here now.

Watching Xinyan and Yunjin play? Hes on the roof.

Picking ingredients with Xiangling to help her cook yall some amazing food?

Hes in the tree u were just picking Sunsettias in-

◇

So ur in Mondstadt, and ur like,

“oh well no Xiao here, huh kinda feels weird now”

eventually ur dumbass trips over nothing and goes tumbling down a hill, u know, as u do

Ur at the bottom like, 💀 

And its kinda hot and ur tired, and r selfaware of ur own goofiness so u just-

“I can see the end of the horizon, is this an internal dialouge-”

Xiao comes around the hill ur splayed at the bottom of.

UR STARTLED BC WTF MONDSTADT?? XIAO??? SO U JUST

“HATSUNE MIKU-”

CRYING-

AND XIAOS LIKE-

“??? No. It’s me. Xiao. The Yaksha Adeptus, my liege?”

HAHFLAHHAHA

AND HE KEEPS ASKING U WHO HATSUNE MIKU IS THE WHOLE WAY BACK TO THE CITY AS HE ESCORTS U LFMAO

♧

U see those scary ruin machines the ones with the fucking legs in Sumeru,

Cyno is ur bodyguard for the day, 

And at first he doesn’t see it, like its behind him, but it just like came around a corner, so it hasnt locked in on yall yet

(i headcanon that even if u r the Creator, these are machines, and dont have the sentience to even be self-aware let alone process wtf u are, ig if Khaeynriah made hella AI that is aware maybe it could fathom u)

◇

And u try to warn him but not scare him, so

“CYNO.

CYNO, THE HORSE IS HERE-”

Cue Cyno like

“A horse??? In the desert, Greatest Lord what the fu-”

Almost gets stomped on 😭 rip.

♡

U see Scara for the first time and u befriend him

Ur the only god besides Nahida he’s ok with aw

and one day he’s bodyguarding u around Sumeru 

He gets a little too into it and goes ham on several ruin machines

Like full on elmo burning anarchy meme, he's literally cackling floating above the pile of flaming metal-

And ur just clapping like: “that’s my skrunkly :) <3"

He literally interrupts his own cackle, its the most expressive youve ever seen him 

😶 😑 😶 ?????¿¿¿??¡¡?!!

HE WILL NOT STOP HARASSING U ABOUT WHAT IT MEANT LMAO

U usually define the words/memes as best u can but u specifically just call him that and never explain LOL

☆

🎵 HI. ITS ME. IM THE PROBLEM ITS ME. 🎵

SO SORRY ANON MY BEAUTY- I HOPE U CAN FORGIVE ME FOR TAKING SO LONG 🙏

I dont even mean just replying with a real thing^

I probably couldve posted ur ask w/o even adding onto it tbh

I dont think its anywhere near as chaotic as what u described but ya boy isnt the good at writing 😔

so i just focused on the memes 🤲

Have a good week anon :O !!

♡

Cheers,

🌒🌧🌊 💀Aquarius ♒️🌌🌘

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

[couldbeglorious]

theres aaa malevolence womence momence rn and uhhh to me it's not rly a problem that there arent voiced women / women without heavy voice distortion, it's perfectly possible to have good characters that are spoken of / read about in letters / otherwise nonverbally present, it's that the characters who are women aren't well-written, rounded characters. they're ideas and concepts (often cool ones!) placed as set dressing or information posts or a wall to bounce a ball off of for the story arthur's doing at the moment, they arent people with agency and drive. and then they die. Sorry, they Have Died. Amanda could have written more letters where she had a personality, she couldve have interacted with the woman who became the wraith, she could have stayed alive and written letters directly to arthur, emily could have been someone beyond a backstory gory detail, anna stanczyk could have... been a character instead of being periodically alluded to as "existing" (and have her name pronounced correctly sometime). Marie was pretty close ! then she went and discarded her own sister being brought back from the fucking creature that took her husband in favor of suddently making arthur her surrogate son and how shes such a lonely old woman who has only need for a little guy to be special. Hattie? just a vessel to the end i guess, never a person. and that's not to say male characters have it much better, what with the "instantly being so enamored with arthur at first sight it's literally incomprehensible if you took your shipping glasses off" , "throwing all secondary characters in the laundry chute in the s4 finale" which wasnt even needed at all since arthur was going to time-travel ANYWAY , but , thing is, they obviously are people with a past and a want and a story. thought experiment : take your general idea of the characterization of noel, or oscar, or even Parker, remember we never heard him speak either!, and apply it to an avatar with a woman's face. does this new OC feel different than how the women who have been present in the show feel?

[urbestestwindgod]

full concise thoughts on the vengeance saga now that its seven am and not twelve—spoilers ahead!

im not sorry for loving you—calypso’s bitch ass whiny cunt song that she was lonely so she deserves to violate someone without him complaining :( its not faaaiirr like girl shut up. you shouldnt be sorry for your feelings—be sorry you sexually harassed and held a man captive with rapey implications, knowing it made him suicidal? you suck here dont go crying you manipulative evil awful woman (sorry chat i hate her)

dangerous—ok damn tonal shift—aside from everything else im obsessed with the wind back coming back. “we went through so much to get this” my theory is hermes spent hours begging aeolus to make him another one for his great grandson, “raging storm inside” aeolus put his windussy into this one huh? love sending out some winions for backing vocals for hermes, the bag has poseidon’s storm which makes a lot of sense bc there’s two versions of wind god aeolus, the odyssey where he’s the son of hipp…smth i forgot the rest and is said to be beloved by the gods or smth idn he’s just rlly chill like that and then another version (which to someone who can see a great lake from their backyard thinks makes a lot of like sense weatherly) where aeolus is poseidon’s son. so i believe whole heartedly poseidon’s storm couldve been stored there no problem—anyways hermes put more moly into this one i feat cause godsdamn!

charybdis—another poseidon child, this is just facing off poseidon’s bloodline for 13 years huh? (not counting the 7 with calypso bc there aint any immediate relation) love how excited odysseus is that he doesnt have to kill her. he just has to get away. i know that felt so good to his conscious, so so good and then the enddddd aghhh

get in the water—me and my friends (again we live literally next to a great lake) always joke about poseidon beckoning us forward into the water so its like jorge knew i guess? nono im kidding erm thats kinda crazy like…i would have thoughts but i blanked out so uh its like really super ultra mega cool

six hundred strike—THE THE BEGINNING??IS THAT AEOLUS’ MUSIC MY EARS HEAR???? windbag jetpack is craaazyyy and . the big part. stabbing a god with his own signature weapon. 😨ill take ten pls. then the iconic line u know the one

[mazzystar24]

hi its birthmark anon! weird lore from me i guess i dont mean to trauma dump because my dad is fine lmfao but i HATED that scene because of the “your dad is still alive” line. my dad had heart issues when i was a kid to the point he needed open heart surgery and i remember so clearly my aunt saying something similar to my mom in front of us when he was hospitalized. my mom said she couldnt make thanksgiving dinner because my dad was in the hospital and she had to take care of me and my 3 siblings who were all pretty young kids (i was 11 i think and my younger brother was 9. i remember thinking my dad was gonna die) and my aunt was like “at least you have a family”. we didnt see her for like 5 years after that lmfao

also the “you guys need your own hospital wing” line also frustrated me because i had my own health problems as a kid (im alright now) and people ALWAYS made those sorts of comments to me. i didnt even register the daddy shit until later and that only made the scene worse because while it felt like buck was trying to lighten the mood and make it something they have in common but tommy dismissed it AGAIN. like its not even about sexual jokes to me its about him being an asshole in every scene he’s in 😭

anyway thanks for the birthmark clownery i doubt kim will return but we had fun 🫶 this whole discourse is dumb because the scene just sucked. if they wanted me to believe tommy gave a single fuck they shouldve had him come to the hospital abd they should also address the role he played in the gerrard shit for hen and chimney because they HAVENT and it drives me NUTS

anyway love you bye

Hi birthmark anon!!

Dw Im always down for a good trauma dump like one of my friends and I legit never spoke to eachother before despite being in the same class for a year but only became friends because a cancelled class led to us trauma dumping to eachother for our first proper conversation for like 2 hrs

Omg can’t believe your aunt said that that’s actually so iffy, but yess exactly the “your dad is still alive” line was just so so bad and I hated it sm like idk if you saw my replies on my other post or not cos I put it in much more in depth way there but like I too am a traumatised girlie and if someone said that shit about my bio dad I would literally lose it cos it’s one of those things that get said so much to traumatised people and it’s honestly a big no from me

Like sure SOME traumatised people MAY regret not fixing it but also it might not be fixable and you don’t know the situation and also maybe they won’t either way that’s their prerogative

and sometimes what’s right for them at the time isn’t what’s right for them long term and all these things are fine

Like me personally if my dad dropped dead right now I would genuinely celebrate and feel not a single ounce of regret and that’s fine and id deck anyone who said it’s not

Like if Tommy has his own trauma and feelings about his dad and their relationship then that’s fine but this sort of imposed rhetoric on another traumatised person is just a no from me

The hospital wing line is another thing that I didn’t see mentioned but bucks face DID flip but that’s a whole other debate yeah

See that’s the thing like I know I have Tommy loving followers but I personally dislike him cos they haven’t gave him (imo) substance or like enough other than sardonic comments and shit

Rip our fun with the Kim and buck parallels you’ll always be famous🫡

But yeah like even if people liked Tommy and bucktommy I feel like they can blame the writing or execution or context but like overall not liking that scene it’s not just about hating Tommy or bucktommy imo

YES THEY COULDVE PLAYED IT SO DIFFERENTLY IF THEY WANTED TO DEVELOP TOMMY AND BUCKTOMMY AND IT DEEPLY CONFUSES ME WHY THEY HAVENT IF THEYRE CARRYING IT INTO S8

Anyways also love ya byee🫶🫶🫶🫶

[theosconfessions]

The Miscellaneous questions for River and his man/child, i mean husband.

i actually loled haha!! thank you for asking, love.

MISCELLANEOUS: Is money a problem? River: its not. i think we're lucky that blake got drafted and makes a good amount of money playing football. we literally got married while we were still in high school and a good majority of kids that do that are NOT in the same position we're in right now.

How many cars do they own?

Blake: we own two. one for riv to take the kids around when im not home and one for me to take to practice/games all that stuff.

Do they own their home or do they rent?

Blake: DUDEEEE if my apartment couldve magically grown with every kid we had ..then i would still be renting. good memories in that place

River: better memories in a place where we actually have room for kids..and me.

Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside?

Blake: we're balls deep in suburbia right now. his parents live out in the country and FUCK I WANT IT SO BAD.

Do they live in the city or in the country?

River: suburbs ..for now.

Do they enjoy their surroundings? River: i was fucking DYING in that apartment. i think having the house kinda gives me space so i dont really necessarily feel like im suffocating.

Blake: you feel like your suffocating?

River: in your man cave apartment i did yeah.

What’s their song? Blake: i gotta do it' so high school'-taylor swift

What do they do when they’re away from each other? River: we dont constantly text eachother but little pics through the day i think. gives us time to be you know separate people and lets us enjoy whatever we're doing at the moment without being glued to our phone all the time.

Blake: i demand sexy riv pics every night im away [smirks]

River: demands a strong word.

Blake: you know what i mean. i APPRECIATE sexy riv pics every night.

River: dude. looking like a douchebag.

Where did they first meet? Blake: we went to school together [smirks] friends first.

How did they first meet? Blake: we were in the same gym class and he fucking PELTED me with a dodgeball man. love at first sight. for me.

Who spends the most money when out shopping? Blake : *points to riv*

River: treats.

Who’s more likely to flash their assets? River: oh my god blake. he does it during games. FINED ALL OF THE TIME.

Blake: worth it [smirks]

Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? River: me. hes not coordinated at all. youd think he would be but....

Any mental issues? Blake: oh god yeah. i mean...

River: i have depression. the past years been kinda.. i dont know. but i am doing better. im getting better

Blake: my boy.

Who’s terrified of bugs? River: i think both of us? fuck that shit.

Who kills the spiders around the house? Blake: Nellie

River: definitely Nellie.

Their favourite place? Blake: [smirks] theres this little ranch up in chestnut ridge. i love taking him there. just me him. no kids.

River:thats a good place [smirks]

Who pays the bills? Blake [raises hand] and proud of that shit

Do they have any fears for their future? River: i think that...we went through a lot of rough stuff in our separation and i just..do not want to go through that again. i think we're on a good path right now and i want to stay on that path

Blake: i think what riv said yeah. the last thing we both wanted when we were having problems was a divorce. and its something i do not want. i guess thats my fear for my future. i just wanna be good for him. i know i wasnt in the past.im trying to be now.

Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? Blake: me for SURE.

Who uses up all of the hot water? Blake: again me for SURE. but he can crash the shower whenever

River: me time,babe.

Who’s the tallest? Blake: me. rivers a short shit.

Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? River:thats definitely blake. i LOVE showering alone but hey.

Blake: wont turn down that DICK.

River: gross.

Who wanders around in their underwear? River: [points to blake] he hasnt learned.

Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? Blake: River for sure.he has a pretty voice though. love to hear that shit.

What do they tease each other about? River: i like to tease him over how much of a pussy he was for me back in our first starting dating days

Blake: i cried after we fucked for the first time. for real. and id do it again.

Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? River: me. blakes taste is .....

Do they have mutual friends? River: not anymore.

Who crushed first? Blake: oh me for sure. unless riv is about to say something i didnt know

River: i never really considered that AT ALL until you kissed me that one day. you werent on my radar at all i was so into my girlfriend at the time

Blake:until ....

Any alcohol or substance related problems? River: no we both quit that stuff when teddie came along.

Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? Blake: we are good boys [smirks]

Who swears the most?

River: i think me and its purely because of my dads influence i swear to god.

[qoldenskies]

Yes yes yes I love ask games :3

14, 21, and 76? (for CL specifically on the last one!!)

14. how do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

i am a verrrryyyy sensitive person who's had a fair share of panic attacks (my record was uhhh three in a row in one school day! i think i was in seventh grade? but it was once a day for pretty much my whole sophmore year it was NASTY, especially because i had fits that could last hourrsss) so i really claw deep into my own experiences when i write guilt and spiraling thoughts, it's not really cathartic or triggering for me but it helps me get into their brains a little!! although i HAVE cracked at couple of scenes, never into tears but sometimes i find myself holding my breath or feeling a pit in my stomach. i was actually hyperventilating a little when i wrote cw ch11 it was craaaazy

really i think the thing ive tried to emphasize the most was to go out of my way not to make it... detached, i guess? its a limited third person pov so im thinking in the way they see the world, how things go in and out of focus, etc etc. it can fuck with the prose but i think punchy simplicity works well especially when it comes to scenes with despair/fear (i think of that one line "He was feverish and delirious. He was scared and alone. It was so dark." in CL because goddd he's just a kidddddd.,,,,,)

idk im mostly eyeballing like everything i dont have any concrete advice

21. Would you ever collaborate with another writer for a story?

oh for sure at some point, maybe!! although i go at an extremely fast pace and my mind is always racing, and when i used to try to collaborate with my friends with ocs and stuff i always got. frustrated always having to consult them, so i would end up in my own little bubble and i always felt like such an asshole :( im worried i would end up doing something like that if i did, although i dont think i had problems doing it back in like 2019 so maybe? fanfic might be different, especially since its a lot more linear

its an appealing idea for sureeee, especially if i have a lot of synergy with the other person and i dont feel awkward presenting ideas LOL

76. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [Fanfic Name]?

ive gotten some ideas that i thought up AFTERWARDS, but when it comes to CL as i was writing it hmmm yeah i actually cut a couple of things because i put it out a little precooked,, originally i thought i was gonna release it on halloween!!

it was mostly in regards to the early stuff, little scenes that i thought would round out the pacing that i cut because i couldnt find any inspiration for them, but when it comes to the nasty abuse i will say: i was originally planning to show the beatdown in the hallway, and i wanted to rewrite the family meeting to make it worse. i've ACTUALLY been cornered like that by my family before (for uh. asking for therapy of all things, it's in the Traumatic Experience log, but its been years and they've all apologized and changed dw), although not to that extent, so i felt like i couldve made it longer. just make it crueler and crueler and crueler. and then i thought about it and was like Ehhhh raph wouldn't allow that he's not that far gone yet LOL. dude i was originally going to make them tear into EVERYTHING i could possibly think up. down to his little verbal quirks and the way he stands (and that's less from MY personal experience and more the way that i've seen people ONLINE shit talk others, especially neurodivergent lolcows. it was a very good source of inspiration). it was very close to getting nasstyyyyy.

OH and i wanted donnie to stay with april a little longer but it didnt turn out that way, i got her into the story like i wanted so success (and his absence gave them space to plan the murder attempt)

[eternalera]

my problems with jjk 271... beware of spoilers- if you havent heard them already lol

surprisingly im fine with the ending part of the ending, like what gege was trying to do. with gojo no longer needing to be the strongest because he's trained the next generation to be what he was saying the higher ups were so scared about. he said that the next generation of sorcerers were gonna be extremely strong so much so that basically the higher ups couldnt do anything against them so more gojo's in terms of strength and stuff like that.

gojo changed jujutsu society and while it is present and it does show it as in his dream does come true its done so in such a... a bad way. the whole reason this manga was started was because yuuji swallowed the finger but it continued because of gojo's ideals and gojo's dream.

but he's thrown away the second that it's convenient. i get not liking characters that are too strong or that youve made. but if theyre that impactful and that important to the story then... suck it up and write

you cant just throw away everything that theyve done because you dont like them, thats gonna make for a shitty ending and thats what happened.

gojo shouldve gotten a funeral, at least a scene of a funeral or at least a grave. maybe one even next to nanami where the trio could stand there and possibly talk for a moment to try and end the chapter. then we couldve gotten the flashback with yuuji and gojo with gojo telling him that yuuji has to forget him.

that wouldve worked so much better rather than them going on some random ass mission. i get that its supposed to be them returning to normal, but at the same time maybe you couldve ended it with them receiving that mission smiling and then going off to do it as the manga then ends all after you resolve everything.

trying to show that everythings back to normal and then ending it is like trying to read a book backwards. it spoils the ending. the ending being that everything has been resolved after a long journey.

it would give a somewhat satisfying end to gojo's character and what he was trying to accomplish and hell maybe you'd even get some sort of scene with all of them thanking him. i still want a scene of megumi or yuuji thanking gojo for everything and yuuji thanking nanami. but we just dont get that.

what gege was trying to do, make it seem like everything was normal again and that they were returning to it after such a long battle wouldve been fine with me. but how he got there really bothered me.

not to mention that i wouldve liked that whole mission bit to be cut out. it adds literally nothing except them being the main trio and fighting off curses (which i'll always love but like... maybe not in the last chapter when the main battle has already happened).

that couldve been for gojo's funeral like stated earlier. it couldve been used for them thanking everyone who's helped them along the way.

i guess we dont have all of the pages but still... kinda hard to come back from that.

these are all just my thoughts on the jjk ending though. i might rewrite it to fit this later on :)

if i do i'll post it too so dw :D

[fatatoes]

M’kay I have some thoughts about the witcher and wlw representation in the Witcher book series!

CW for sexual abuse and spoilers

Tbh when I had just read the Last Wish and half way through the first book I just gave up on the series. The women were just written so weirdly to me. Ciri was so innocent it was almost fetishised and the long and meticulous description of Triss and her sexual history was really unnecessary.

IN FACT when Triss’ “experiments” with women were mentioned it was almost explained as like ‘she tried EVERY deviance. EVEN *gasp* the THAT’ :| it was weird.

That’s not to say the writing didn’t get better later, like I guess Sapkowski spoke to a woman since finishing Blood of Elves.

BUT. He insisted on pointing out gay people exist in his world. Which is fine. He also insisted on telling us how people of his world felt about gay people. Also fine. You can write homophobia in your stories, not the worst thing I haven’t been warned about.

But in the entirety of the literature I’ve read from the Witcher series, I haven’t come across one i think more about than the Mistle and Ciri sex paragraph.

For anyone wondering how they’re supposed to feel about this: NOT GOOD. It was a not good thing that happened :||

Mistle took advantage of Ciri’s vulnerability and fear and, yes, practically raped her. But it was written???? As if it was a good thing???

I didn’t expect any better from Sapkowski having read the previous Witcher books, but I still feel like this is a fascinating part of Ciri’s story.

Were I not more aware of tone armour surrounding this event in the book, I would’ve said it was an interesting study on queer youth because IT COULDVE BEEN RELATABLE.

From my own experience as a queer woman: as a teenager, finding a queer friend group with people who are actually interested in you was everything! Even if those initial friend groups are full of lying and manipulation and violence and yes, sometimes even sexual harassment, you finally feel safe, why would you ever give that up?

I feel like a lot of my friends ended up being dragged into problems with vandalism, drugs, sex addiction etc exactly because they stuck in the environment that raised them to be used to that as a price of love of their chosen family.

Mistle and Ciri are a toxic couple. Ciri WAS just a child when she joined the Rats and having peers who harness her skills and treat her as one of their own was a treasure to her. Even if that family came with drug abuse.

I have no doubt in my mind Ciri loves the Rats and that she loves Mistle, just as I have no doubts Mistle loves her just as much. But they are hurt queer kids in a homophobic world that feel like they have nobody else, who else would they love?

I am SO SURE Sapkowski didn’t write them in with this in mind tho pffff. Honestly? The Rats feel like an afterthought in the books.

If I were to write the Rats arc into the Witcher series, honestly I WOULD have the Rats survive, but Ciri to still be taken away. Them dying might’ve felt like a resolution to some people, but I would argue that having Mistle survive to break up with Ciri would’ve been a better resolution.

I’m not done with the book yet but it seems as though they are going for a familial love angle where Ciri will not take any of her remaining love interests, but it would be so cool if she were to face her sexuality and admit the toxicity of her past choices.

Idk sounds like a *lmao libtard* kinda ending, but it seems to me like Sapkowski just wrote that relationship in there to be able to say he has a bisexual character in his books so I’m no more shallow than that kind of thinking.

Also also

This is kind of why I would’ve loved to see the Netflix version of this story. As much as I hate how much they changed the story, as a standalone piece of media, it isn’t that bad. At least it has more believable women. Were they to adapt the wlw relationship with Ciri and Mistle though, I’m sure they would’ve sanitised it, which isn’t the BEST adaptation but at least one that doesn’t make me want to die