#bsd ship rambles

[bsdrambles]

Akutagawa is always freezing. Like, shivering in the spring and only feeling warm in the summer. Atsushi is always warm. Even in the winter, he's always warm.

Akutagawa and Atsushi cuddle to balance each other out

[sskk-manifesto]

Bungou Stray Dogs: Dead Apple and how “ability users” (opposite to “normal people”) learning to accept themselves through the acceptance of their own abilities is a queer metaphor of acceptance of own's sexual orientation and gender: an essay by me

[deluluzai]

Am I the only one constantly sad about the fact that Kunikida's and Dazai's partnership isn't focused on enough instead it's abt Dazai and his ex partner, Chuuya or Fyodor and so on?

Like, yeah this doesn't have to be in the ship sense but I've seen so many ppl in this fandom summarise Dazai's and Kunikida's relationship that Dazai is a smart, silly, perfect character who does what he wants, and Kunikida is the annoying, stuck up, fun-ruiner who hates Dazai with a burning passion, unlike Soukoku.

We need more Kunikida appreciation, and more Kunikidazai acknowledgement bc yeah Dazai's past is focused on a lot, but ppl seem to forget his current partner who Dazai also means a lot too :((((

Anyway I'm rambling sorry ppl I'm sleep deprived

[e0nssadrift]

I wish people would not reduce characters down to just their gay ships… it’s honestly the most aggravating things about fandoms, and it’s not just one 😭

I can list several ships off my head that, for some reason, the fandoms (specifically fanfic writers and fanartists??) will just reduce to “gay twinks in love” or whatever trope their relationship is??? that or they give the characters NO individuality?? like looking for art of my favorite character and all I get it is ship art or fanfic of them with their ship and it’s like??? Enjoy what you want but trying to find cute art of one character and constantly getting ship art is INFURIATING ESPECIALLY WHEN THE SHIP ART IS LIKE??? SUPER NOT IN CHARACTER?? idk now I just sound like a bitch BUT I THINK SOME OF U WILL UNDERSTAND ME

also this whole post is not directed anyone, it just irritated me and idk where else to post about it 😔

[marichild]

my friend and I were talking about the soukoku "discourse," if it can even be called that, and we concluded that both soukoku enthusiasts and soukoku haters should do a stint in rps/rpf. it'd change you as a person trust

if yall are taking the creator saying one (1) thing about a pairing so seriously you'd never survive the insane household we were raised in 🤩

[esmiara]

What do you mean Chuuya's official character song (Darkness My Sorrow) indirectly refers a few times to Dazai and tells he holds the key to the bird cage that is his world. Wha- why is official content always the gayest and gives the most amazing symbolism??

[purrfectlycontent]

me when people start doubting dazai and chuuya’s trust in each other after chapters 101-105.5 (which has been established over and over again by asagiri, and probably for this very moment)

[deimosatellite]

laughing so hard the only reason i started shipping fyodor bsd and steinbeck bsd is bc theyre my two fav authors and have very thematically similar works and now finding out people fw it ... though tbh its kind of a banger ship GS9Y8DUFPIJHDSIFJK

[shibusawaz]

actually I think that fyodor and nikolai ARE friends, that fyodor genuinely intends to be a friend to nikolai. That nikolai genuinely does value fyodor.

but I also think that friendship is really, really fucking codependent. I think that fyodor needs nikolai to rely on him. I think fyodor provides nikolai a sense of acception and belonging because nikolai will return this with wholehearted belief in him. I think that fyodor needs a challenge, a challenge that nikolai provide without becoming a driving problem for fyodor. I think the spirit of their friendship is "if you accept my flaws and quirks and oddities I'll accept yours. I'll feed into them and enable your behavior" I think that, if anything, fyodor is dazai's opposite. the reason fyodor is so bad, the reason fyodor is a "demon" like dazai was, is that he has no one to form a balanced relationship with him. He has someone who accepts him and his flaws and supports him. He has many, many people who try to challenge him on his wrong beliefs. I think he needs someone who does both. I think the reason fyodor, as a person, cannot develop is because he is so trapped in this loop of competition with those on his level and manipulation of those below it, is because he hasn't realized all of this. Unlike dazai, fyodor hasn't realized, or doesn't completely understand, that even some "godlike genius" such as him or dazai can enjoy the company of others. I think the same goes for nikolai too. I think, even though he's not on the same iq level as fyodor, I think they both have the same low emotional intelligence. Nikolai just responds to this "outlandish idea" of enjoying someone's company much more violently. I think that Nikolai wants to kill fyodor not out of a desire to be free, but out of a fear of being trapped. I think that he's, like fyodor, hasn't processed the value of being friends with someone. However, I think that nikolai, instead of ignoring this like fyodor, takes action and blames it on his mentality. I also think they're both mentally ill

[slayerkid]

Kunikidazai headcannon ramble

(Mostly written back in January of this year)

My ramblings will be based off what I've seen from the anime. But from season 1-3. So my bad if I miss anything to factor in. And mostly just for now me rambling about how they got together.

CW: Very minor mention of suicide

I think the idea of a punctual guy who is just normal getting paired up romantically with a playful yet chaotic and tactical character is funny to me and I'm all for it to be honest.

I like to think starting out Kunikida didn't really see Dazai more than just a coworker. And then kinda didn't like him once Dazai started messing with him. So he started kinda hating his guts sometimes because when it comes to just doing the work, Kunikida respects Dazai because he knows Dazai will actually do his job.

Dazai meanwhile had some interest in Kunikida, but more so with teasing him a lot once he noticed that Kunikida was the partially gullible type. And he enjoys Kunikida's reactions whenever Kunikida realizes that Dazai gave him misinformation or tries to mess with his schedule.

Dazai did at some point date Chuuya when he used to be in the Port Mafia. But he obviously broke up with him around the time he left Port Mafia.

So when Dazai first met Kunikida, he felt a similar energy that Kunikida shares with Chuuya. Dazai definitely has a type, and it's people he can get away teasing and still be yelled at.

Kunikida is more of a bi icon and he does have 58 criterias for a spouse. But he says woman because he doesn't wanna out himself just yet. And even though he says they're criterias, he doesn't actually want all those criterias met. Because he's still unsure of if he should have a partner who he'd risk having them worry a lot for him since being in the Armed Detective Agency is a dangerous job. So he uses the 58 criterias as an excuse to reject people who either make the attempt to ask him, or to stop himself from pursuing someone.

Dazai once took a peek at Kunikida's notebook and flipped through the 58 criterias page on Kunikida's "ideal woman" and noticed that it wasn't titled 'Ideal Woman', it was titled 'Ideal Partner'. Which Dazai found interesting on a more gender neutral use to refer to someone instead of a gendered one like he kept verbally saying. And the more he looked at the criterias, the more he noticed that a good amount of the stuff listed, were not at all linked to a specific gender or anything that he'd expect a man like Kunikida would say he'd want in a woman.

It wouldn't take long for Dazai to deduce that Kunikida may also be interested in other genders besides women. He also took into account that a lot of criterias written down seemed too unrealistic for one person to have. So Dazai was convinced this was because Kunikida was not allowing himself to be in a relationship.

After Dazai got a good scolding from Kunikida after getting his notebook back, Dazai decided that instead of simply teasing Kunikida about his 'unrealistic preferences' he would wanna see what is actually Kunikida's type if it were a man. And what better way to start than with himself. Dazai did think Kunikida was handsome and didn't mind the idea of dating Kunikida. Although he'd not push it too hard if Kunikida didn't reciprocate.

Kunikida would be pissed off that Dazai looked in his notebook long enough to have read something. And was concerned that Dazai might've actually found out that he wasn't exactly straight. Kunikida knows that Dazai is no stranger to blackmail. And it would be a pain in his ass if Dazai used it against him.

Kunikida wasn't concerned about some people in the Armed Detective Agency finding out, but he also doesn't want someone else to out him because it's neither their right nor business to do so. He'd keep an eye on Dazai and see if there's an attempt. But nothing really happens at first.

At first.

Eventually Dazai seems playful or teasing towards Kunikida. And the poor man doesn't get why Dazai is being more annoying than usual.

Whenever Kunikida gets paired up with Dazai for a mission, Dazai would do some slight flirting banter and Kunikida either doesn't pick up on it or is flustered by it because he's not used to being flirted on, especially not by a man.

Kunikida does believe that Dazai is conventionally handsome but he didn't have a crush on him. So when Dazai started flirting towards him, he wasn't sure how to feel because on one hand, he doesn't think co workers should be flirting on the job. But at the same time, he didn't mind it.

It would be a blessing and a curse that he tells Dazai to only do that outside of missions.

Because now Dazai is flirting towards Kunikida discreetly.

It starts with simple sticky notes being placed at his desk. Some of the official workers start teasing that Kunikida has a secret admirer and it leads to some light gossiping on wondering who it could be.

Atsushi would ask Kunikida if he has any idea on who it could be. Kunikida does have a good idea on knowing that it's Dazai given how he's been behaving lately and isn't even trying to hide it. Yet at the same time Dazai is doing it in ways where he'd be the only one to notice. However, Kunikida only tells Atsushi that it is someone he knows. This only made the office workers more interested.

The office workers would attempt to bribe Ranpo with sweets to tell them who it could be. Fukuzawa catches wind of this and asks Ranpo to not say who it is since it's not their business to know. Fukuzawa is basically Ranpo's dad so he listens and doesn't say who wrote that love note to Kunikida. Yes, he still takes the sweets.

Ranpo would at this point watch Dazai and Kunikida's interactions from a distance. But he wouldn't do much. At most he'd just say, "Ya seeing this Yosano?" or "Atsushi, take my place for this case, there's a show I'd rather watch".

It takes a bit for Atsushi to figure out Dazai's attraction to Kunikida. Dazai casually tells Atsushi that he's unsure if he'd want to commit double suicide with Kunikida since he knows it would go against Kunikida's ideals.

Dazai would unintentionally developed more proper feelings for Kunikida and start feeling inadequate in the sense that he wants the opposite of what Kunikida's ideals are.

This causes Dazai to feel a bit down but makes attempts to hide it.

Leading Kunikida to pick up on this and bites the bullet to ask Dazai if he's okay since this feels different from his normal antics.

Dazai's chest feels tighter hearing that.

He says nothing but desperately hugs Kunikida. The blonde man is taken back by this however he decides to just confront the brunette in front of him.

Kunikida is confused what's gotten into Dazai. He'll admit, he did think the hug felt nice, and he could tell the hug is sincere.

Kunikida: May you please tell me afterwards what's wrong?

Dazai burrows his face in Kunikida's shoulder

Dazai: Some other time. I just wanna be like this for a bit longer.

They both stood there a bit longer in silence.

The blonde could feel a slight tremble from the brunette. He felt that it was correct to hold the other slightly tighter. He tried gingerly brushing his fingers' through the brunette's locks, in an attempt to calm him down.

More additional silence.

Dazai shifts himself briefly where he looks directly into Kunikida's eyes.

Dazai places his head on Kunikida's chest, hearing his heartbeat.

The brunette closes his eyes and slowly exhales.

Dazai pulls away and gives Kunikida a genuine smile and walks away before Kunikida could say anything.

This felt different from the Dazai he's some to know.

He's unsure if the world is ending or if he got a small glimpse at Dazai's feelings. But he wants to understand what's going on.

The following day the blonde asks Atsushi if Dazai has said or done anything off.

Atsushi didn't see much different from Dazai.

It takes a moment for the silvered haired young man to recall.

Atsushi: He might've mentioned something about your ideals? I'm not sure what he meant at the time.

Kunikida: My ideals? He's never seemed to care about them.

The blonde man started to think.

Meanwhile in the distance Ranpo is witnessing his new soap opera. The events unfolding in front of him-

Kunikida checked the sticky notes that he put into a stack and compared writings from both Dazai's unfinished paperwork and those sticky notes. Yes, they seemed to be a match.

The blonde took a moment to think until it hit him.

...Did Dazai...? Like him that way...?

The thought made his cheeks lightly flush.

Sure, he thought Dazai was conveniently attractive. But he never at that point felt much for the guy in the romantic department.

Looking back at that moment where Dazai hugged him felt nice. It gave him slight butterflies in his stomach as he's trying to recall.

Kunikida texts Dazai to meet him at the park in about 30 minutes. Dazai replies as his usual goofy self. Something Kunikida doesn't argue with in that moment, seeing as how Dazai seems to be avoiding his feelings.

Kunikida grabs his notebook for his ideal woman and heads off to the park.

Atsushi noticed and was about to stop him until Ranpo latched onto him, ordering him to get him some snacks at a nearby store.

Kunikida sits at a park bench and thinks things over several times. Each time made him nervous.

His thoughts would get interrupted when Dazai sits down next to him.

Dazai: My, this is the first time you ask me to hang out.

Kunikida: I wanted to talk to you about something.

Dazai plays dumb and cocks his head slightly to the side.

Dazai: Hm? About what.

Kunikida: How you've been acting recently. Your feelings.

Dazai's face falls to a frown.

Dazai: You have quiet the imagination Kunikida. Leave that to only me and the other kids.

Kunikida scoffed at that last part.

Kunikida: I think we both know what you're talking about.

Kunikida turns his gaze to Dazai and asks sincerely

Kunikida: Do you... Have romantic feelings for me?

Dazai: ...

Kunikida tries studying Dazai's body language. Noting that Dazai is somewhat playing with his hands.

Kunikida: Your handwriting matches the ones on those sticky notes and before that, you even teased me about my ideal woman. Something as of recent bothered you somehow.

Dazai: Oh wow you didn't pull anything back. Something I'd expect from you.

Kunikida: Please answer-

Dazai: So what if it's true? What then?

Kunikida: I'm not sure either.

Dazai: Then I don't feel like answering.

Kunikida: Huh?!

Kunikida was confused what Dazai was trying to pull here. The blonde haired man was trying to clear things up for the two of them, but Dazai doesn't seem to wanna clarify?

Kunikida: That hug the other day... I felt the Dazai that doesn't easily show himself to anyone. Now tell me whats wrong.

Dazai: ...

Dazai: ...

Dazai: ...

Kunikida got frustrated and cupped Dazai's face.

Kunikida: Back there, I felt you tremble. I felt you hesitate on something. That isn't normally like you. And your behavior has been off more so than usual. Please, just tell me.

Dazai takes a moment to examine the blonde.

There was silence between the both of them until Dazai broke that silence.

Dazai: Why should I let myself fall in love with someone who wants to live?

Dazai's face falls to frustration with himself

Dazai: Why bother when we're both too different?

Kunikida: So you're admitting it?

Dazai: ...

Kunikida: I think I understand now.

Kunikida holds Dazai's hand gently. He feels he's vaguely understanding Dazai.

Kunikida: It's okay to want to choose life.

Dazai looked into Kunikida's eyes.

Kunikida: This book, is just a fantasy. I don't expect for such a person exist, if there was, then I must be dreaming.

Kunikida pauses.

Kunikida: You know, it's okay to be different from the person you like.

Dazai's heart ached. Tears threatened to fall.

Dazai: I class to hard-

Kunikida: What does your heart want?

Dazai: ...

Dazai: ...

Kunikida sighs: Here's what mine wants.

The blonde holds up Dazai's hand and gently places his lips on Dazai's knuckles.

Dazai's eyes widen. Tears start pouring from his face.

Kunikida: I... I love you.

The blonde used his thumb to wipe away Dazai's tears.

Dazai: Is it really okay for me to feel this way?

Kunikida: Of course.

Dazai smiles.

He proceeds to mimic Kunikida and held up the blonde's hand. And gently kissed Kunikida's hand.

Dazai: I love you too.

[daz4i]

oh wait i did promise a full dazai and nikolai comparison post didn’t i. time to deliver. no keep reading button, we’re clogging everyone’s dashboards like men. enjoy

clowning

so. i doubt i need to elaborate much on nikolai’s clowning - it’s very plainly put in the text, he along with other characters constantly call him a clown, and he obviously takes on a clown persona.

nikolai’s method of clowning is to take it to the extreme - everything he says sounds like a joke or pure nonsense, making you doubt everything that comes out of his mouth immediately, even when he’s saying the truth.

dazai’s is only slightly more subtle. i’m basing this on no longer human, given that so much of his character is based on yozo. dazai puts on a mask of a carefree, funny, lazy guy, especially to the agency, just like yozo does

his method of clowning is to seem genuine. pepper in just enough truth to make others believe him. seem reliable enough to make others trust him. but never showing his full self, so you should doubt everything he says

ultimately, the same outcome, done with different methods

so, we all agree they both do it. now, let’s analyze why. dazai’s is more obvious imo, so let’s start with him. 

with the agency specifically, it makes sense, gotta appear nonthreatening n all, seem like a normal guy with absolutely no past in the mafia (at least at first). i’d also say it can be used to make his enemies underestimate him - no one expects the goofy silly guy to pull a knife on them, after all, and you definitely don’t expect him to be a mastermind.

on a deeper level, if we go back to the yozo train of thought, it’s also to protect himself. no one can leave you, hurt the deeper parts of your soul, attack you personally if they can’t figure out who you are. no one can get close enough to matter to you then get taken away, the way oda was.

nikolai’s reasoning is less grounded in canon or external works (that i know of), so feel free to disagree with that part (with any part of this post tbh.) but in my interpretation, he does it for multiple reasons:

same as dazai, not letting anyone close enough to get him to care. nikolai sees bonds as something chaining him down - he cares about fyodor and sees him as a friend, and that’s why he wants to kill him. if you see him, he will care about you, and he can’t have that. better to have the self inflicted cage of a mask than have the key in someone else’s hands, if you wanna be poetic about it.

chaos! a lot of what nikolai does is to subvert expectations, be illogical, to prove the existence of his free will. nothing more chaotic than a clown

to contrast dazai, rather than make his enemies underestimate him, nikolai’s intention is to make his teammates underestimate him. he’s trying to throw their suspicions off him - oh, he defied the plan fyodor set up? well, can’t blame him, he always does silly shit like that. look how crazy that guy is, obviously he can’t follow orders - so he can freely do what he wants and only have them catch up way later.

already, we see a lot of similarities, as well as opposites-within-the-same-action. let’s continue

death

tldr: both are supposedly willing to die, yet still avoid death.

dazai sure managed to survive a lot of suicide attempts, huh! weird how all of his on screen attempts - especially since oda’s death - have been using methods that are easily to survive, like drowning. that’s so strange guys i wonder why’s that (psst i wrote a whole post just about that already)

and nikolai sure did give a dramatic speech about how dying will set him free, very convincing! weird that he faked his death, then. hmmm.

granted, nikolai’s speech might’ve been The Page’s work, but tbf it does align with his views on this topic so i’d like to believe there was some truth there, just like there’s some truth in dazai’s suicide attempts - yes, they want to die, but... there’s more to be done first.

both of them seem to hold a high value in the act of dying, and both see it as being set free. both feel trapped in their own life - nikolai outright says so, that he feels caged inside his own head, and if you dig into dazai’s character song you see him describe life as a “never-ending today”. both see death as salvation from their situation, but won’t get down to achieving it.

this is actually a good place to transition to our next topic,

meaning

since i mentioned dazai’s character song, one thing he seems to focus on there is looking for meaning, or rather being frustrated that he hasn’t found one yet (he also brings up this internal conflict in the dark era, but the song solidifies it as relevant even in his current state). dazai tries so hard to find meaning, but can’t.

nikolai’s fixation on free will, i’d argue, is not quite a search for meaning, but rather a struggle to prove there is no greater meaning in life, in order to ease his own guilt. none of his murders matter at the end of the day... right? then why does he still feel this way?

ironically, both can find meaning in their bonds - dazai has many at this point, with oda being the main one he might’ve found meaning in before, and nikolai has fyodor - but this is scary. they’re not used to having meaning, to caring. and so we circle back to the clowning, to pushing people away, to wanting to kill fyodor, to the comfort and familiarity of no meaning. 

guilt

like onions and ogres, clowns have layers. bear with me here.

on the surface, you’d expect them both to feel guilt for their horrendous acts. peel a layer, and it seems neither of them particularly does, otherwise they would stop doing it, you’d assume. peel back another layer, and... honestly, i think they do, but are just repressing it.

this is smth i get less from the text and more from their real life counterparts, tbh. going back to the yozo comparisons, he does outright say “i’ve lived a life filled with guilt” which. is very fair to expect to hear from our dazai. meanwhile the real life gogol straight up died because of his guilt. i don’t think asagiri would overlook stuff like that when turning them into characters.

nikolai also does outright tell atsushi he feels guilty for the atrocities he committed - though, pretends he didn’t mean it immediately after, putting back one of those layers we tried to peel.

going back to dazai’s song, it’s the “the tainted past, too, begone!” line that i feel is nodding to it. dazai obviously knows the things he’s done while in the mafia are wrong, seems like he knew while being in the mafia as well given his conversations with oda during the dark era. but this really does make it seem like he regrets it, imo.

they’re both repressing their guilt for the same reason they won’t die. there’s more important shit going on. dazai outright tells atsushi that wallowing in guilt is pointless, and we see him move forward and execute plans even if he’s still feeling guilty throughout, and even when he needs to do some dirty work to make them happen. nikolai is the same in that regard - he’s just hyperfocused on this goal of proving his free will, and guilt is another thing that’s keeping him caged, so he must break free from it. wallowing in it will simply be counterproductive.

sorry i gotta talk abt fyodor now

but it’s gonna be short i promise

so we’ve got this all knowing, unbeatable, super smart guy, right? anyway what if the only people we see outsmart him were 2 suicidal clowns. wouldn’t that be funny

so, it’s a bit tricky to call it “outsmarting” with dazai considering how their whole Thing is give and take that’s not going to end any time soon, but fyodor obviously views him as someone on his level so i’m counting that. he wouldn’t put this much effort into someone he didn’t think was less smart than him. and, he calls him a worthy chess opponent for a reason

nikolai did outsmart him, though. nikolai was supposed to die. nikolai wasn’t meant to survive the plan, let alone come to meursault and put fyodor in a death game when he could’ve escaped using the vampiric guard he planted in the prison instead. nikolai is throwing an unpredictable wrench in the plan of the guy who knows how everything is gonna turn out because humans are so predictable.

clearly they both affect him a lot, more than we see others have. both of them are the only ones so far we’ve seen get on the same level as fyodor

and, both of them are seen by fyodor. nikolai explicitly says fyodor is the only person who sees him, and dazai is seen because they are the same, on a certain level. fyodor understands them, which is why it’s even more impressive that they can outsmart him, imo

in conclusion

asagiri i am on my knees begging. make them interact properly please please please

fr tho, i’m curious if this means something. because this is a huge amount of similarities, especially when they’re not really related in any way and barely ever talked. does it mean anything?? how about nikolai being able to use his ability on dazai, does that mean anything????? asagiri please give me some answers i am asking so nicely

anyway. thank you for reading! lmk if i missed anything, or reblog with your own additions and analysis. if you disagree with anything i said, feel free to express that as well, just be respectful. hope i managed to infect you with my brainrot as well. have a great day :3!

[bsdrambles]

Dazai and Chuuya use(d) the caesar cipher to talk on missions where important information couldn't be sacrificed. They would also pass notes during meetings and when they got caught no one knew what was said. They also wrote on each other with random notes in the caesar cipher

During an ADA and PM meeting-

Dazai - "Hmzzdf nx xt xmtwy!!"

Chuuya - "Mfm? Xmzy zu, Rfhpjwjq."

Dazai - "Dtz qtaj rj ymtzlm."

Chuuya - "Bmfy?"

Dazai - "N qtaj dtz!"

Chuuya - "..Qtaj dtz."

(shift five letters! or read the tags)

[nouveauxamoris]

excerpts from miyuki’s sketchbook <3

RBS APPRECIATED!

[x-itzzzzzz-x]

thinking about Atsushi Nakajima and kicking my feet while giggling gleefully

[kyouka-supremacy]

Like technically I know chuuaku as a ship has a great angst potential too. Not to me though that ship is sugar spice and everything nice

[frankenjoly]

if i had a nickel for every time i ended up literally crying my eyes out over a character i love tons that gets fucked fairly shortly after they adop a girl i'd have 2 nickels which isn't too much but holy shit it's happened twice