#boy my brain hates me 👍

[eeveekitti]

anyone know how to stop procrastination [or rather i think the term for this is autistic inertia??] cause i want to draw more than anything but can't get my brain and body to actually do it

[catgirlkirigiri]

I am once again posting furry satosugu

[uranium235s]

it occurs to me I've actually never done anything to introduce my courier despite posting about him 400 times I just kinda made everyone witness him so here's some basic stuff + his lore under the cut (long and probably very boring post incoming)

chester was born in Utah and lived there til he was almost a teenager when the Legion swept through his village and took him as a slave. his parents were much older, and were killed, and his other family (older brother) had left for California some months prior, leaving chester the sole support of his family. he does not remember his birth/original name

chester had some decent experience (for an 11 year old) of fixing machines because his father collected pre-war cars and motors and sold them and their parts for a living and so was sent downriver to Arizona to serve as a repairman and technician. while Legion property he was given the name Chiron

Chester lived in Arizona with the legion until he was 20 years old, hating every minute. a boy around his age by the name of Attilius was charged with keeping watch over him and bringing him new projects, and during the duration of their time together had developed a rapport over Roman poetry and literature, the only thing they could stand to talk to each other about.

Attilius was watching over him when Chester staged his escape and made it out. the two fought with Chester emerging victorious, believing he had killed Attilius, and escaping despite some severe injuries, including a spinal cord injury that ended up giving him brain damage, causing him to live with hallucinations, seizures, and worsening eyesight from this point on

Chester escaped via the Colorado River and came out on the other side in Nevada. he started wandering aimlessly, ignoring his injuries until he began becoming faint and passed out in a toppled semi truck and was discovered by some well intentioned folks that were traveling up the way to Vegas. they got him medical help before leaving him in Primm, at which point he took up a job as a courier with the Mojave Express at age 21, taking on a new name which he now cannot remember.

the freedom of being a courier was something Chester lived for. every day was a good day, he could go anywhere, meet lots of people, and got paid pretty good for his efforts. he was, and I cannot stress enough, perfectly and utterly happy with his simple mailman life, and misses it every sinnggglllee day during the game events. this continued on for ten happy years, in which time he learns that his older brother, Tomás, has become a trooper with the NCR. he avoids reaching out for some years after the discovery, wary of what his brother would think of him for his years in the Legion (even if it wasn't his choice.) when he does reach out, the only thing he receives in return is his brother's dog tags, learning he was killed in the battle of hoover dam 😀👍

the day after his 31st birthday is when he took the platinum chip job and ended up in a shallow grave in Goodsprings. after his brief coma and stay in the doctors house, and picking a new name again (Chester) and after resolving tensions with the Powder Gangers, he immediately cut a path to Vegas on the hunt for Benny. at first, he wanted revenge, but the anger turned to confusion, turned to helplessness. on his way through quarry junction, he was attacked by an injured deathclaw that had been abandoned by the rest of its pack, and recieved the scratches that blinded one of his eyes

after the attack, he managed to run as far as the NCR sharecroppers outside of the Strip before he collapsed and crawled his way to Freeside, where he was discovered by an unsuspecting Arcade, who took him in with haste and stitched him back together. the following day when Chester finally woke, Arcade gave him a full examination and decided it was medically unsafe for him to be alone and decided to follow him to keep an eye on him, though the two get a lot closer over the game events. Arcade also decided it'll be easiest if they make their way back to Primm and start the investigation from where it all began, rather than trying to break into an expensive, well armed luxury district and demand answers from a complete stranger. Chester agrees.

Chester has questionable memory of his past. he more or less remembers being a courier, in fact it's the period of time he remembers best (in comparison) about his life and kind of sensationalizes it and how badly he wants to return to that stage of his life, but the future marches ever onward. he doesn't remember any part of his life before the age of 15, and therefore only remembers he was part of the Legion and not the circumstances as to why. he avoids and detests them, scared that he's forgetting something awful about who he was and what he did, and keeping the information close to his chest. he remembers being Chiron, and doesn't know the limitations of his Chiron persona, and therefore has been renaming himself and reinventing himself every chance he gets (this is made worse by the fact that he remembers "killing" Attilius and fears that it proves he was as evil as the rest of them)

after the game, and because he had formed a strong relationship with Arcade, he elects to join the Followers of the Apocalypse, offering to help find and restore medical supplies across the desert. this arrangement lasts for about a year and a half until the events of Dead Money take place, and chester has a severe downward spiral upon returning home. he gives all his money from the Sierra Madre away immediately, tried to keep the severity of how bad he was doing mentally under wraps so as to not draw any concerns or questions from his friends but ended up breaking down and having a less than stellar confrontation with Arcade involving holding him at gunpoint (I must stress he was not in his right mind!)

after that they grew distant for a few months when Chester was back to patient status amongst the Followers, skirting around camp, talking mostly to some of the better suited doctors about what he was going through, before him and Arcade inevitably made up! and the rest is happily ever after. kind of

other misc things:

• chester playlist

• favorite wasteland animal: bighorner

• favorite radio song: johnny guitar - peggy lee

• lives in Novac and in Freeside

• closest relationship with Arcade, but also with Lily, Julie Farkas, and a decent partnership with Boone, though he gets along better with Manny and talks to him more often when in Novac

• he doesn't remember the dog tags he wears are his brother's, but he keeps them on because he feels like it might be important. I think he rediscovers this fact when he revisits Utah much later in life

• he hates wearing his glasses and pretty much only does so when Arcade or Julie insists he must (and insist they do)

• Attilius did not die in their fight, he was found unconscious and badly wounded and was punished by having his tongue cut out (with the claim that having those talks with Chester made him too weak to do his job.) the two met again during the second battle and he was killed in combat

• he develops a fondness and eventual passion for energy weapons after visiting the Silver Rush with Arcade and taking an interest in why he likes them so

• never returns to the Lucky 38 after the events of the story, so that casino is just rotting eternally. would ideally give the property to anyone who needs it but doesn't know who needs it to begin with

• low intelligence high science and medicine because of how invested he gets in learning from Julie and Arcade, and medicine in particular he finds passion in when speaking to Lily and examining her condition

• high perception because of paranoid hypervigilance

• clothes were given to him by The Followers after he showed up post-deathclaw attack, originally had a denim jacket but it was ruined in the conflict

[diagonal-queen]

sorry for coming again but i’m the one that asked you abt the dazai ranpo and chuuya make s/o one! if writing abt a male s/o is difficult you can do gn reader who wears tang tops if that’s alright!!

hi again! no need to apologise- i love having folks in my inbox! i got a little worried when i saw the male reader lol. i'm so sorry my love but unfortunately i don't write male readers simply because i do not know what it is like to be a boy/masc-aligned. i would hate to write something that makes male readers uncomfortable or dysphoric.

Reader who sleeps with a tank top

♡ pairings: Dazai Osamu, Ranpo Edogawa, Chuuya Nakahara x gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: How do these boys react to reader who sleeps in a tank top?

♡ cw: Fluff with a bit of suggestive (damnit Dazai), ~intimate touching~

note: Never had one of these types of requests before so I was excited to start writing this one! Apologies for errors, hope you enjoy x

Dazai:

Dazai is highkey a pervert. He's the kinda guy to sneakily grope his partners in public and is generally pretty handsy. This doesn't stop in the bedroom! In fact it ramps up by a billion

He was veeeery excited to learn that you shed most of your clothes when you sleep.

He claims that he can't sleep unless he's cuddling you, which itself is kinda sweet, but in Dazai's head cuddling just means fondling lmao

If you have boobs he's ABSOLUTELY copping a feel. If you don't have boobs he's still copping a feel. It really doesn't matter what gender you are or how large your chest is he is obsessed and always holding it tbh

Even if it's super cold he'll insist that there is just no need for you to wear any more because he'll keep you warm! Subtle 👍

Nah he's not gonna stop you if you do decide to put on a long-sleeve shirt or something, but his hands are still gonna find their way under the shirt. Man just needs his physical contact and that's okay!

He WILL use this opportunity to kiss your neck/shoulders and give you hickeys. I mean it's RIGHT there

He probably uses this method to try and instigate sex with you (whether or not it works is entirely up to you. If it were me though-)

Ranpo:

Ranpo likes clinging to your arms, skin-to-skin contact, and just generally clambering on top of you and holding you like a koala. Safe to say, he's very happy about your choice of jammies

When he first slept in the same bed as you and you wore a tank top he probably didn't even notice. The most important thing in his brain was 'must cling to Y/N', which he did!

But it felt nice having another person to cuddle with :) especially because it wouldn't get too hot when you did cuddle, as opposed to if you were wearing like flannel pyjamas or something

Ranpo honestly doesn't really care too much about what you wear when you sleep (he is going to hug you either way) but he's not complaining.

Ranpo probably doesn't wear many clothes to sleep either (autistic things <3) so he doesn't really see it as a sexual thing as much as Dazai does. In his head nobody really wears thick pyjamas to sleep so to him it's totally normal

He likes to nuzzle his head into the crook of your neck and inhale your scent, because he finds it comforting.

Also probably nibbles/bites your neck lol

Would he start wearing a tank top as well? ...maybe

Chuuya:

Chuuya isn't a pervert like Dazai (at least not as blatantly, anyway). But he's not at all gonna object to you wearing a tank top because it highlights your chest and torso and that is his favourite place to put his hands when y'all sleep

He's one of those guys who puts his hands under your top and like rubs your stomach/hips (in a comforting way ofc)

The first time he slept with you he was probably a little red faced at the amount of exposed skin, but he eventually got used to it and now he loves it

Chuuya is certainly a cuddler but if it were summer and you were dressed in a tank top he might not touch you as much because he'd understand that you might get a bit too warm.

Chuuya is so polite- he always asks if you're alright with him holding you, and doesn't really let his hands wander too much

Chuuya is not a man who has received very much physical affection, like ever. Like Ranpo he probably really cherishes the fact that you're comfortable and willing to let him be close to you

Traces little patterns on your shoulders :')

Always compliments you on how soft your skin is and how nice it feels to caress. If you have freckles on your arms/shoulders he thinks they're adorable too <3

btw i'm cool with writing suggestive stuff like this- just not like EXPLICIT smut. not only do i feel awkward writing it but i'm also just so bad at it lmao. ya girl loves a bit of sensual cuddling/making out every now and then

[ruumirmir]

𝘐𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘔𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘘𝘶𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘗𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘣𝘰𝘺

ੈ♡˳ Author's note - I simply have too many unfiltered thoughts about them Sorry not Sorry. This is entirely self-indulgent and completely male-reader centered. Don't worry ladies,, If you're imaginative enough!! You too can self-insert into this yaoi!!! If any of these don't make sense to new readers Don'tttt worry about it :) Probably didn't make sense to ME either but the vibe matched. @eluxcastar my trusty co-pilot for this ship,, do you have any memes to add perchance 🎤🎤 I'd love to compile everything here.

If you think Pantalone isn't a possessive prick you're WRONG. Lucky for him some people are into that.

Being gorgeous and evil go hand-in-hand one cannot exist without the other

*Sighs dreamily* Dont we all

Synopsis of my first two Pantalone x Male reader requests everybody:

Im sorry but it would be fucking hilarious for the plot. Loverboy being soooooooo normal about the rumours going around that Dottolone are Such Close Business Partners,,

but actually dottolone fucking hate each other. Group projects tend to do that to people. Its the biomechanical malpractice doctor vs business unethics banker. And dottore getting a massive kick out of this one fatuu agent hating his guts . Idk Just a Thought :0

What being microwaved does to a man. Dont worry guys Pantalone can manipulate and gaslight me into a killing machine anyday bc he's hot <3

Hoyoverse canonizing Pantalone's anger-issues is the best thing that happened to me. you can never trust an anime snake with a (^‿^) face

One does not simply work in close proximity with a hot guy and Not think about getting boned atleast once.

Somebody save childe

Makes zero sense in hindsight but the lore is coming. trust 🙏 Something so delicious about finding your way back to the person that changed you forever.

Hes just a pathetic little guy your honor. Let us all enjoy his extreme sad boy demeanor and sopping wet meowmeowism before we put him through the HorrorsTM.

Synopsis of literally the most recent Loverboy one-shot by riri:

Something something blatant favoritism.

Reminder that Loverboy joins the Fatui as a part of mandated service right after graduating school at the fresh age of 18 and kills a guy roughly 3 years later :D

Peak dynamic btw. He can be your angle or yuor devil. As long as he's behind over your shoulder 👍

"I learned my passion in the Good Old Fashioned School of Loverboys"

Thankyou homoverse they made Pantalone a certified Yapper. Him and Loverboy are just the "Talks a lot" vs "Listens" ship

No caption. This was just funni

Hey guys can anyone tell that I love a good corruption arc.

Despite his increasingly worsening state of ethics, don't forget that deep down hes still going to be a sopping wet meowmeow💕

Idk blame @/eluxcastar riri they put the devil's temptation thoughts into my brain

[mysticcollectionbee]

Loki season 2 Ep.5

(SPOILERS)

This just gonna be a list of things I’m obsessing over in the new episode by order of importance to me (I’m sorry):

GOD. OF. STORIES. Buildup. YES!!! From the episode title to Loki specifically mentioning saving their stories (only other time he mentioned stories to represent a person’s life was in the very first episode of this show I think). I’m way too excited.

Mobius…I’m sorry this will be mainly Lokius based. *Ahem* Mobius a single dad who can’t shut up about being single and the only person he talks about stuff that isn’t just Jet-Ski related is Loki. Everyone else he meets he kinda just stays on topic but Loki; “Hey, stranger who might of followed me from work, want a beer? I’m also a single dad.” And two things I feel like I see differently than a lot of the fandom: a) I don’t think Don (Just remembered that’s his name) has a dead wife. Like, who describes your wife being dead as ‘Long gone’ and immediately tries to pawn off a belonging that you used as a couple? b) People saying the kids act like Loki and Thor which means Mobius represents Odin but…Odin kinda sucked as a dad? And Frigga was a MASSIVE part of raising the kids, so an Odin variant being able to step in is. Unrealistic. Oh and Hela? Hi??? Hela exists. So nah, I think they made it that way the same way they made Thor adopt Love, to fix the mistakes of the past generation with the new ones. Thor is raising Love unlike how his father raised him. Loki could raise the brothers to not have the same issues he had with his own brother, and what they both had issues with when raised together by Odin.

(Last one was long) I think I made a theory a long time ago that Casey/Frank was related to the unsolved case of the guys escaping Alcatraz. Could be wrong, if not, hey one of my theories was right!

O.B. my baby boi was a failed Sci-Fi writer that ended up inspiring the god of stories to save all the stories across the multiverse. He’s secretly the most important writer character in the MCU :’)

B-15 being a nurse makes a lot of sense and explains why she became softer and more focused on helping others after she got her memories back. Her true nature of helping others came back to her, which probably ask explains why she really hate the idea of pruning people again.

I want to talk about Sylvie and all the neat stuff about her…But my Bi brain keeps getting distracted by that scene of her without her jacket…She’s- she’s great here too 👍

Final unimportant thing: Any Doctor who fan get time explanation flashback the moment O.B picked up that mug with pens in it? “I’m a pen in a mug?” “Yes you are, Donna Noble.”

[arkhamjack]

Thank you everyone for the reblogs on my "how some of the fandom sees wolfwood vs how I see him" lol I wanted to continue the conversation bc I am very annoying about this stuff and it grosses me out bc I am sensitive or whatever but um yeah 🤓

It's pretty long so TL;DR stop being weird about Wolfwood thanks 👍

I'll talking about objectification, hypersexualisation, and prejudice so a warning I guess --->

The Gaze has been working overtime on Wolfwood's ass (and tits) and it's making me a little nuts. This is not to say his character cannot be presented in a sexy way, or that he cannot perform sexuality without being problematic, it's just... ask yourself: why.

It can be subconscious, you might not even notice it, but media tropes have a way of worming into people's brains to be regurgitated into fan art, especially if the character presents or is coded marginalised in a way you are not. (I do it too!)

It starts from young. I had an adult call me a "hot head Latina" as a child LMAO (I am not even Latin)

Characters and actors that looked like me were worked into typically these roles - If feminine, desired, sexy but crazy, dangerous. If masculine, similarly sexual, either hot or ugly, suspicious.

I feel silly and attention-seeking for speaking up about this kind of stuff, especially as I feel I'm not in a place to cry 'racism' specifically because I'm more 'ethnic' than POC.

I'm a Balkan mongrel - Greek, bits from Turkey, Albania, and fuck knows what else. I've always kept my head down about people being weird to me but it comes to a point like the point of a classmate comparing my hair to an animal's, where I feel I gotta go "ok yeah lets unpack that."

Now about Wolfwood, he's our classic racially/ethnically ambiguous smoky sexy guy. Particularly in the 98 anime, he's pretty bosomy. He's a struggler - swindling Gunsmoke with his charm and portable confessional. This swindler trope, I've observed, tends to go hand in hand with 'suspicious immigrant out for your money'. Again, maybe I've pulled that out my ass and I'm being oversensitive, but I notice things. Tastes left in my mouth. Anyway. Brings to mind the time some other classmate jokingly called me a 'hustler' for *checks notes* making sure my work is submitted on time.??

Now on the subject of NSFW fanart... oh boy I am so uncomfy writing this... I rarely see him depicted.. receiving. You can place the issues here pretty easily. Give him a break. Please. Also I did note this on my original post and also completely my own opinion but PLEASE that man is not bigger than Vash, and I don't mean like not taller, like, thiccer. Calm the fuck down.

I hate having to write this bc it makes me uncomfy and reflects my own experiences of objectification by other people which sounds all very "oh noo its sooo hard being attractive :'((" but I trust y'all smart enough to see where I'm coming from.

The gaze. Othering. Marginalised masculinity (not to mention my intersecting trans identity thats a whole other unrelated convo). Hypersexualisation. Objectification.

But back to Wolfwood!! - are these tropes perpetuated by the original creator? Personally, I don't think so. (Wolfwood's design is based off a Japanese guy btw - musician Tortoise Matsumoto) The 98 anime? Maybe?? Am I reading too much into it? It's hard not to - naturally I'll latch onto the ambiguous guy and go "alright let's see how they do this" so naturally certain things stand out to me.

But when some of that fanart starts rolling out ... Jesus Christ ... MY EYES

On the flipside, I've seen great fanart out there! And I've seen quite a few Latino headcanons for Wolfwood too!(like I mentioned before I am not Latin, I am also not American in general I am a filthy freak Australian with our own colonial racist histories and intricacies) (There is also Latin diaspora here but I don't wanna speak for anyone aaaah)

I'd like to think most of the fandom is cool about him. But um. Yeah.

I said what I said but if I did say anything out of line I am so sorry and PLEASE let me know - I am using my own experiences as reference and acknowledge the intricacies my own privilege

Yap session over 👍

[selfcontrolskey]

My Knight.

❗️Plot wasn’t mine but I wrote it❗️

One shot Rafe Cameron imagine

( sorry I’ve been gone for so long also this is short l’m gonna try and post more now )

Rafe Cameron x Reader

You were at a kook party with the pouges when this guy grabbed onto your arm.

“Excuse you!” You said as you tried to pry yourself from his grip.

“I know you,” he slurred

“I don’t think so,” you replied as you looked around trying to find anyone.

“No, no I do. You swiped left on me.”

“What?”

“Why’d you do it? Because you think you’re to good for me or something?”

Was this guy okay?

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you finally managed to get out of his grip only to stumble into another guy, dressed in a flannel but a couple of buttons were undone at the top and a nice jacket on over it.

“Please please please, act like my boyfriend. Kiss me or hug me I don’t care but do anything that’ll show that weirdo I’m taken.” I mutter just enough for the mystery guy to hear me.

Without a word, his arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you closer into his hard body. “Since you said please.”

Then he kissed you.

The kiss lit a fire within you that you weren’t aware existed and all too soon it was over and he was leaning away but still remained close to you.

“Wow. You go from flirting with me to kissing another guy?”

Your mysterious kisser stepped away from you and faced the creep. “We have a problem?”

His voice was deep and it caused goosebumps to form over your body.

"Because if we do," he shrugged off his jacket and rolled up his flannel sleeves.

"I'd like to take care of it. now. Man to man." He studied the other guy. "Or, boy. Since a real man would never accost a woman like this.”

The other guy gulped, looking visibly shaken.

"Whatever. She isn't worth it." He stumbled away but not before your knight in shining armour grabbed his arm.

"That's where you're wrong. If you have one braincell in that brain of yours, I'd suggest you say sorry for being an idiot then leave."

The guy mutter a quick ‘sorry’ then ripped his arm away and sped walked out of the party.

Your knight turned to you and slowly approached you.

"You okay?"

"l am now." You say smiling up at him.

I honestly hate this so muchh but I need to post. 👍

[toasterhasabucket]

I HATE THE infantilizing OF TOBY AND I HATE TUE DEMONIZING OF HIM TO. PLEASE HAVE A OKAYISH MEDIUM.

he's not an ABSOLUTELY horrible person but of course he's not a sweet angle sent from heaven either, duh he's done some things but of course it's not entirely his fault. In my opinion almost NONE of it is his fault, I will not fight about this.

Also by infantilizing , what I mean is people making him as if he can do no wrong and is completely innocent and SAY it's Canon. I GUESS it's not as bad if you know it's not canon, i joke about him doing no wrong because hes my favorite character of all time, but I know it's not canon and I would never think it was.

Like the whole sweet boy waffle boy toby thing. I remember that. Oh god, I remember. I was a fan in elementary school, (in 10th grade now) I used to think him being annoying, loud, "hey masky" and so so so so bubbly was canon and nobody told me otherwise. But as I got older, in 7th grade I realized "oh that's not canon. Huh. Okay cool 👍" and I went about my day, I wasn't like OH MY GOD my sweet innocent baby boy is- is evil???? No. I just moved on.

and more recently, less people have been 'babying' (I'm really not sure if this is the righhttt word) and more peopoe have been demonizing him. If you have tiktok or have been paying attention to creepypasta drama you'll know there was someone telling their "realistic headcanons" and it all was just demonizing toby and his mental illnesses. They talked about how he would be abusive and drink and hurt you yada yada you guys get it. But I think everyone who was a toby fan in like 2016 just IGNORED (Natalie) clockwork and tobys relationship or just hates it so much they forgot it was HEALTHY. Toby Rogers had a HEALTHY, CANON RELATIONSHIP.

I cannot express how much I love love love toby and how much his character has meant to me over the years. Don't judge me please please please please please please please please.

Okay so In elementary I was obsessed with (fanon- but what I thought was canon) toby. I loved him so much I took his personality, yk the loud, annoying, "I'm the favorite hehe" mindset, weird obsessed with waffles (now I hate saying the word waffles, I cringe just thinking about it.) And I had a BEST friend who I assigned as my 'masky friend' so I annoyed the ever living hell out of her. "Hey (insert girl name here)! Hey (insert girl name here)! Hey-" so much I'm surprised she didn't kid curb stomp my brains out.

I loveddd fanon tobys personality so much I thought everyone else did too but, rightfully so I guess, everyone thought I was annoying and weird (that was the plan but in like- a loveable way I guess if you know what I mean???)

I just want to say I loved toby then, I love him now and it will continue as long as I LIVE.

👍

EDITTTT IN ORANGE! OKAY I USED TRG WRONG WORD! THANK YOU FOR CORRECTION

[our-trans-youth-experience]

Can you give me some advice as I'm questioning my gender yet again.

So basically, I'm an AFAB teenager, and up until about 8 I went with girl [and was very feminine], then 8 til around a year or two ago, I didn't really care cause it just didn't matter to me. Then I identified as demigirl, then genderfluid, and now nonbinary, and I was just considering starting to use he/they pronouns when I started to get stressed about gender. I feel dysphoria sometimes, and I was so upset when I got my period and stuff, though I don't know if that was just not wanting to grow up. I don' understand women, or why you'd want to be one, but occasionally I feel more fem, but I don't want to be a girl. If I could have been born a boy I would've, and if I ever think into the future, I'm only happy if I think of being a man. Sometimes i don't feel dysphoric saying 'I am a woman' and sometimes [usually] that feels so wrong and stresses me out. IDK,I'll probably just stick to being non-binary, but I also want to be a man, and I wish that I'd been born one. Also,i've been quite depressed lately, and I've hated myself since I was 11, however, because I only started questioning my gender a year or two later,it can't really be connected to that, can it?

Hope you're doing good, and thank you for taking the time to do this.👍

Hey there anon, thanks for sharing your experience!

I don't know your brain so I can't tell you a specific label, but I can try give you some possibilities. From what I've understood, you are NOT a girl but occasionally feel more feminine, you feel non binary and also male at the same time.

Have you heard of bigender before? One of my friends is a bigender guy, meaning that he has two genders (male and non-binary).

Another one of my friends is aboy (agender boy) which means that it doesn't have a gender but wants to be perceived as a boy.

You could be a demiboy (someone who partially identifies as a boy), or genderfaun (fluid between multiple genders, but never female/feminine)

Or you might be like me! I'm a transmasc person. This means that I am a very masculine non-binary person, but not male. I use masculine and neutral terms, but obviously that is completely up to you.

About your period, being upset about your period definitely counts as dysphoria, you are not just afraid of growing up. If having a menstrual cycle becomes too distressing for you and you are in a situation that allows you to do so, I'd recommend that you look into ways to stop your period.

Hope this all helps a little, happy gender hunting!

[deritosmi]

Do you have a spidersona? If so, wanna talk about them?

OH MY GOD I LITERALLY KICKED MY LEGS WHEN I SAW THIS!!!!!!

HEHE YES I HAVE A SPIDERSONA YES I WANNA TALK ABOUT THEM OMG

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

HAHAHAHAH OKAY SO

his name is dolce (for now)

For like seventy million years I didn’t know that you could make a spider sona that wasn’t extremely similar to yourself so I might change a lot of stuff about him pls be patient:)

I have yet to design eir suit buuuuut I HAVE drawn their face (trying to mimic spiderverse style)

I’ll say I think it was pretty good for the first time but I think the lineart was a bit too thick and the eyes weren’t really faithful to the spiderverse style so I’m probably gonna redraw (and redesign a little bit)

BUT ANYWAYYYYY (tee hee)

here he is!!!

My spider-sona 👍👍

Earth-143

Preferred name: Dolce (pronounced Dol•che)

Surname: Patal 

Nickname(s): 

Dookie 

he protested against this

Dolly 

he protested against this

Cheche 

he protested against this

Eight 

only used by fellow heroes

Phanny 

he absolutely hates this 

Cryptid name(s):

Eight Eyes

Explanation for Eight Eyes

The back of Dolce’s suit has a design that resembles a set of eight eyes. The first person who ever saw him only saw his back, hence the name.

Hero name: Phantom-8 (or just Spider-Man)

Pronouns: He/They/E/It (spivak)

Background 

Personality: INFP-T

Zodiac: I don’t know yet :)

He was bitten by an UNDEAD radioactive spider and now he fights against ghosts (in secret).

Rather than being seen as a hero, he’s seen as a cryptid(and his presence has caused more business and tourism in his little town.)

Living in a suburban neighbourhood in Atlanta (but don’t worry, he can roller-skate to get to crime scenes quickly.)

Powers and Skills

Skills

Skating

He can skate at 70mph.

Lying

he’s actually good at it 

Only does it for his secret identity

Spider Related

Spider-sense 

Tingling feeling in his brain that tells him something bad is coming (and what direction ‘something bad’ is coming from)

 High pain tolerance 

See: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MajorInjuryUnderreaction

Natural web fluid

spinnerets developed in his arms when he was bit

Shoot web fluid when they are pressed

Super strength

He can lift 10.5 tons

Ghost Related 

Intangibility 

allows him to phase through anything (except ghosts) at will

Allows him to touch ghosts 

Invisibility

self explanatory 

At will

Doesn’t work on ghosts

Relationships 

Earth-143

Wade Wilson - librarian.

Dolce is apart of the teen advisory board of the public library.

Wade is like a weird uncle figure.

(I love deadpool!!!)

Dolce is super distant with pretty much everyone. He doesn’t hang out with anyone.

Spider-Society

He’s still really distant but he’s a little more willing to be open since everyone there is like him.

He doesn’t really like the idea of making sacrifices to maintain the canon but he doesn’t really have anywhere else to go after being outed to his parents as a trans boy.

Dolce’s Feelings Towards Certain People 

Miguel O’Hara

avoids

Slightly dislikes

tries to be friendly 

Lyla

Friendly

Neutral

Jessica Drew

Avoids

But treats nicer than Miguel

Neutral

Peter B. Parker

Does not avoid

Friendly

doesn’t want to talk much 

Neutral

Pavitr Prabharker

friendly 

doesn’t talk much

Good impression 

Likes by association (Hobie)

Gwendolyn Stacy

friendly

doesn’t talk much

Good impression 

Likes by association (Hobie)

Hobart Brown

very friendly 

Talks a little bit more in comparison to other people 

Likes 

Margo Kess

don’t interact much 

Neutral

Miles Morales 

doesn’t know anything about him

Likes by association (Hobie)

Web slinger

Kinda Likes

Shy-ish

Likes the horse too

Spider Noir 

Unsure

Never talks

Peni Parker

Likes

Talk about interests frequently 

I JUST WANNA SAY TYSM FOR ASKING THIS THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOUUU

you have NO idea how happy this makes me

[tiddiesoutwhenthetisout]

i read a fic once about achilles being the early-riser in the relationship.

idk about you but i think not lmao. i mean, i see the vision. it's cute, but my brain insists he sleeps 16 hours a day plus 3 naps (yes, like a cat, yes) and then gets zoomies at 2am (moreso in modern maybe bc it can be hard to fuck up your sleep schedule in ancient times)

since i can't resist yapping, here's some

sleep headcanons!

sleep is a really important thing to me obviously.

patroclus: sleeps last but wakes up first. light sleeper because he grew up hypervigilant when referencing tsoa specifically. otherwise, i think he's sort of a heavy sleeper (bc tired) who would wake up when roused by achilles in the middle of the night, would give brief gestures like chuckle or pat his head before going back to sleep but he doesn't remember any of it in the morning.

has a harder time going back to sleep, but he's normal about it. just gets up and does something. can get grumpy at unwanted interruptions but only when he's absolutely sick and tired of being alive (modern hc: a doctor or something so since sleep is hard to come by, he has rough days). sleeps mostly on his back, may start snoring so achilles has to slap him (gently) awake.

when entirely modern, i think he adhered to a routine when he lived with menoetius. so he's kinda used to that too, waking up before the sun is completely up. don't know what to give him as a traumatic experience (like pushing a boy to his death) since obv we can't have that here and i'm kinda bad at hcs, so... let's just say he used to have nightmares about it when he was younger, but not anymore.

big spoon status wearer

achilles: sleeps first, wakes up last. isn't really sleeping deeply sometimes, he just has his eyes closed and his surroundings blurring in and out through sense of hearing. sometimes he also stays in bed in the morning because he knows patroclus likes to stare at him like that, and he enjoys that 100% focused attention before the other decides it's time to do some work. light sleeper, though. glowing green eyes shooting open in the middle of the night and when patroclus is still awake he sometimes gets a scare.

sometimes the greeks would hear shuffling outside their tents and it's just achilles scrabbling around instead of sleeping. sometimes humming. has definitely given one or a few soldiers a heart attack at some point. happened more often when he stopped fighting bc he had all the day to sleep.

can get really irritable when he's sleepy. can also get really irritable when a person he fucking hates (aggy?) yells or makes any noise and he wakes up with a start. ("who the fuck was dropping spears at dawn?!" "agamemnon" "oh if it wasn't him i would have been fine") day ruined, patroclus has to calm him down because his soldiers are quaking in their sandals.

modern: will sleep with a plushie or not at all. anything to hug. patroclus or something.

i intended to end this here but now i have to ramble so read on if you're interested 👍 will have less lighthearted topics.

still modern, sometimes he wakes up because he doesn't want to be on his own defenseless and vulnerable (applies to tsoa because of how he had pyrrhus with deidameia. basically grape. he also said it was dark, so it's not too far off the mark when i assume she went into his room at night and suddenly went at it. his attitude when asked was also giving dissociation, especially after i read this fic on Ao3, bless the author wherever they may be now, that his stay in skyros really impacted him a lot).

or because suddenly the other side of the bed feels cold. he turns around to grasp at his lover's clothes or skin depending on whether or not he slept shirtless, and his hands snatch air. he's expressed his mini heart attacks when this happens, which patroclus acknowledges, but achilles knows he has things to do.

so one day on a particularly rough patch for achilles, he wakes up, finds patroclus gone, and starts to cry until the latter hears this and drops what he's doing in a panic to come see what's wrong.

achilles doesn't speak at first. just clings on to patroclus like he's scared of losing him. and he admits that later on when he's calm enough. that sometimes it just really scares him patroclus has been taken away from him. he doesn't want to say "dead", but it's stuck at the back of his throat and he swallows it down. he does not know where this comes from, but there is a hollow ache in his chest whenever it comes to haunt him.

or, achilles says, is scared of the illogical prospect that he himself has been taken away by god-knows-who or what. scared of waking up among strangers who do not have the best of intentions (again i believe it to have something to do with smth like deidameia incident-- thetis has either a role or is not involved but she has passing remarks that made achilles too shameful to say anything to anyone until patroclus).

but the constant is patroclus being gone.

and patroclus just doesn't know what to say, because he wakes up in the middle of the night sometimes from weird feelings of deep-seated fear, checking with every single one of his senses if achilles is still beside him. he can only calm down when he has checked once, twice, thrice. and he moves to hug him as if it isn't an option to not do so. he is careful not to hug him too tight, as he has done that at one point and it was not a nice awakening for achilles. but he just wants to hold on to him as tight as possible so he does not suddenly vanish.

i guess you could say it is in patroclus' favor that he sleeps last (to see if achilles is still there), and wakes up first (to see, also, if achilles is still there).

but he doesn't say this. instead hugs achilles tighter now for he is awake, and they decide to take that morning very, very slowly.

brainrot so bad it probably wasn't a very pretty read (vocab bad, arrangement bad-) but i had to finish it 😫

[flying-jukebox-01]

Brain Damage/Eclipse by Pink Floyd👍🎶

brain damage

The lunatic is on the grass The lunatic is on the grass remembering games and daisy chains and laughs got to keep the loonies on the path

The lunatic is in the hall the lunatics are in the hall the paper holds their folded faces to the floor and every day the paper boy brings more

And if the dam breaks open many years too soon and if there is no room upon the hill and if your head explodes with dark forebodings too I'll see you on the dark side of the moon The lunatic is in my head The lunatic is in my head you raise the blade, you make the change you rearrange me ' till I'm sane you lock the door and throw away the key there's someone in my head but it's not me

And if the cloud bursts, thunder in your ear you shout and no one seems to hear and if the band you're in starts playing different tunes I'll see you on the dark side of the moon

eclipse

All that you touch and all that you see all that you taste, all you feel and all that you love and all that you hate all you distrust, all you save and all that you give and all that you deal and all that you buy, beg, borrow or steal and all you create and all you destroy and all that you do and all that you say and all that you eat and everyone you meet and all that you slight and everyone you fight and all that is now and all that is gone and all that's to come and everything under the sun is in tune but the sun is eclipsed by the moon

[autisticempathydaemon]

hihi im here for the redacted matches thing, if its still open :)

What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why? “Perhaps Vampires Is A Bit Strong But…” by Arctic Monkeys! ive always loved indie rock music, and this song in particular just scratches that musical itch in my brain

What is your Enneagram type? Type 2, The Helper

Do you love gargantuan Youtube video essays, and if so, which is your favorite and why? nooo they’re too long :(

Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend. i was supposed to have a childhood imaginary friend? nah fam i played with calico critters all day, i dont think i ever had a childhood imaginary friend

What is your go-to way to fall asleep? usually just listening to comforting audios, or taking melatonin 

If you had to change your name, what would it be, and why? (In tandem, if you have changed your name, why did you pick that one?) it sounds cool as hell, and if the person i stole it from isn’t using it anymore, imma yoink that shit and claim it as my own

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why? "Your Boyfriend's a Flirty Vampire Prince and ALSO a Cheeky Dork". heart eyes at Vincent rn

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.) Yandere!Ivan and Regulus who genuinely makes me uncomfortable, i only ever listened to Yandere!Ivan for lore reasons and i have refused to even go near Regulus bc that mf is CREEPY. i dont get the hype for either of them really

Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to. OOOH okay SO theres this book called Just Ash by Sol Santana, and the main character is intersex!! ive only ever once seen an intersex character in a piece of media, and that was 7 years ago. Just Ash kinda details the struggles that some intersex people can go through, and i learned a lot because of it (i didnt even know that salt wasting was a thing before reading this book). Just Ash also inspired me to start doing research on disabilities that arent as well-known throughout the world, such as scoliosis or ostomy.

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend? Huxley. i need some good hugs in my life man. and Porter for queer reasons (that man is GAY you cannot tell me otherwise — plus you already know that he has some great sarcasm with the whole gag reflex quip)

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.) when im low on energy, i either go nonverbal or start saying random silly things

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo. despite being white, i have never had the classic white experience of visiting a gas station and terrorizing the cashier with my friends. i dont have a specific gas station that i like, but i looove the cherry slurpee omg that shit goes hard

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment. i have ceremoniously named it ♥️ good shit ♥️ because it has good shit in it (imo). Arctic Monkeys, Laufey, Mitski, Lovejoy, The Orion Experience — basically any indie rock band/soft-voiced sad girl that goes hard

What’s your guilty pleasure media, and why? boyfriend asmr that surpasses asmr because its chocked full of lore and likable characters and world building and

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are! i loveloveLOVE pink omg best color ever fr. also. i eat lore for breakfast, literally my favorite thing ever. i will listen as you info dump about those silly little characters that run around in your head. im also autistic btw if that counts for anything 👍

(ive done this before, but i dont think it sent last time 😭)

Oh, this is easy peasy lemon squeezy. If you’re an autistic person with a love of lore and stories, there’s no better match for you than Guy, our resident storyteller!

One, we love an A4A relationship, and Guy has got to be the dictionary picture of an AuDHD dude, you know? Two, Type Two’s are characterized as being friendly, giving people who want to love and be loved, and Guy would be a good match for you because he is just so loving, so affectionate. I also love him for you because Guy is kind of as far from a yandere as I can imagine, and that feels right.

The more I think about it, the more I realize just how much fun you and Guy would have. He, of the Redacted bois, strikes me as the most likely to listen to Redacted, so couldn’t you just imagine it being a shared special interest between the two of you? You could listen to early access together and scream about it on tumblr, because let’s be real, Guy 100% has a tumblr. He’d also adopt popular lines and the Redacted ringtone as vocal stims, and I can imagine you finding that charming and funny because it would be.

Song:

Every time I think of you/ I feel shot right through with a bolt of blue/ It's no problem of mine, but it's a problem I find/ Livin' a life that I can't leave behind/ There's no sense in telling me/ The wisdom of the fool won't set you free/ But that's the way that it goes and it's what nobody knows/ Well, every day my confusion grows

I’m not gonna lie- I don’t super know what this song means, and neither would Guy. I do know that it’s fun, it’s a love song, it’s indie rock, and it’s a classic. This strikes me as the type of song that Guy knows all the words and can perform without a second thought, thus he loves turning it up and singing it at you whenever it comes on in the car.

Runner-Ups:

David is a runner-up for you because I love A4A pairings, and David is my favorite Redacted boi to headcanon as autistic after Guy. However, I do prefer Camelopardalis as a runner up; he’s not autistic, but I think his nature is more outwardly effusive and affectionate than David’s which would be better for a Type Two.

note: thank you for waiting~ you did send this before, and it came through; it just took me some time to get through the entries before you 💛

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[eastgaysian]

dragon age white boy rambles ⬇️ i need to revisit his siblings...

see my original vision for caden trevelyan repressed homosexual was always that he was homoerotically obsessed with his superior officer who viewed him as a little brother and after that superior officer died tragically at the conclave this immediately got transferred onto cullen. but this was a failed attempt to try and change the fact that cullen has always been deeply uninteresting to me. like i'm keeping it because it's central to my white boy vision but i've realized now that it's much funnier to focus on the fact he wants to phantom thread solas.

basically he has a Repression Framework for fellow templars/soldiers where attraction is more-or-less acceptably translated into intense devotion/idealization, being weirdly invested in hearing about past exploits, fantasizing about dying in each other's arms etc. with solas, caden has reasons to like/respect him - solas kept the anchor from killing him, he's chosen to aid the inquisition of his own free will despite any reservations, he's a knowledgeable older man with relevant expertise and genuinely impressive capabilities, to some degree even the fact that he's an apostate who knows this much and has avoided being found by templars is something caden finds fascinating.

but at the same time solas is an elven apostate who no one knows anything about and is too mysterious to really trust, so logically caden Can't like/respect him, and he doesn't have any established framework for dealing with these complicated feelings. before he recruits the templars/becomes inquisitor their relationship actually gets off to a tentative good start because the Fundamental Moral Disagreements haven't come to a head yet. caden is technically a very recent ex-templar but he's polite and pragmatic, he puts the work in to help people, and he's always curious to learn more, which are qualities solas can appreciate.

after becoming inquisitor solas immediately disapproves of essentially All of caden's major decisions, while still feeling obligated to stay with the inquisition for the greater good. weirdly, solas pretty openly disliking him is what allows caden to justify liking him, because it's not like he's friends with this elven apostate, they're comrades by necessity, he appreciates the qualities that make solas a necessary comrade, and that's fine. at the same time solas is an older male authority figure who is forced to abide by caden's decisions even if he fucking hates them which is opening up crazy new pathways in caden's brain of being able to, from his point of view entirely justifiably, defy the wishes of an older man he respects and wield power over him. all this clicks into place in caden's head and he's like. I want him flat on his back helpless tender open with only me to help.

what this means in practice is they'll go out a-questing and have what seems on the surface to be a cordial conversation about history or whatever but they're both imagining killing each other with hammers and on caden's side it is sexual and on solas' side it is not. he is fully aware that solas wants to kill him with hammers but honestly this kind of makes it more sexual. he's going to punch solas at some point, immediately apologize for losing his temper, and then be unable to sleep for hours that night touching the bruised knuckles feeling something he can't name but knows isn't quite guilt. because he feels guilty for feeling it. this is the gayest thing that will actually happen between them except for the confrontation at the end of trespasser maybe which can be gay if you think about it. normalest guy in all of thedas 👍

[enlighten3d]

sending two asks instead of one combined for reasons akdhkshd

do you have any silly josh hcs? (or any of my characters however i think you might have more for josh idk idk)

OKAY. third time trying to answer these asks (my brain is Stupid) sry its taken so long /g

FUCK YEAH DO I. OKAY. ive probablement mentioned a couple of thesebahfjdjdk. i love making shit up about him

- josh is claustrophobic!! he hates enclosed spaces and therefore avoids the subway like the plague if hes in a place that has one. busses are better but also Bad bcs well. heres the kicker. HE ALSO HAS CLEITHROPHOBIA !! thats the fear of being trapped. these two work in tandem a lot for him. he does not do well on a lot of days bcs well,, weve been over this. hes a bird in a birdcage, ergo he is trapped. he suffers ):

- hes like, reallt bad at minecraft, and video games in general. hes just Not a gamer boy /silly

- hes autistic in my heart. (idk if this is canon or not HEHDJS)

- he like, reallt doesnt like coffee .... chamomile tea and honey guy 👍👍

also, hcs for others !!:

- huan lin, if he could, would get into fashion i think. he seems like a fashion guy ! hed be shittalking ppls outfit choices as a ghost that haunts janette ...

- janette is a coffee girl through and through. drinks too much of the stuff.

- BEFORE THEY WERE ENEMIES, WHILE THEY WERE FWB AND ADELE THOUGHT THAT THEY WERE ROMANTIC DESPITE JANETTE MAKING IT CLEAR THAT THEYRE NOT (thats what happened right). SO DURING THAT TIME. adele. adele gave josh yellow flowers the night after right (as i decided in the poem i sent earlier. its canon to me Ɛ>). SO. ..she also later gives janette blue flowers (maybe the same sort thst kills them??) in a weird Move bcs theyre romantic in her mind and yes yiu can give flwoers to friends just shes like. clear thst thars not what she thinks and janette is weirded out a bit but yeah.

I AM INSERTING FORESHADOWING INTO YOUR STORY. i love foreshadowing. (im rly sorry if im. making too much shit up shdjdjfb; i HAVE judt kinda ran with sun stuff...)

- adele reallt likes iced tea. idk why. she jhst does.

- carmela, for some reason, gives me the vibes of someone who likes baking, so. in my head she does lots of that when/if possible [:

👍👍 i like making things up..... djdjskfn