#block me and hate me and never talk to me again

[my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction]

One For The Road [6]

Cecil Dennis x afab!Reader • Rating: 18+ pals •Masterlist• ao3• want to be tagged? | requestinfo• ko-fi •

Series Masterlist

Summary: You need to get some answers.

A/N: Ahh, we have reached the end! A massive thank you to @thexsanctuaryx for beta reading this series! <3

Warnings: Cecil crying (a lot), talk of pregnancy, anxiety, there's a happy ending, swearing, please let me know if I've missed a warning!

Word Count: 1319

Your first instinct is to leave. Just go. Walk out and drive home and delete his number and never talk to him again. 

But then his panicked face and pleading eyes echoed in your mind, reverberating to the point of madness. 

Just go. Walk out and drive home and delete his number and ignore him for a few days.

But that seemed cruel too. 

You’d only just been doing whatever the hell you and Cecil had been doing recently. Neither of you had talked about what you actually were and besides, it definitely seemed like Danielle and him were no longer seeing each other, or sleeping together. Or…

You needed to know. At the very least, you owed yourself answers.

So, instead, you moped around the house a little, picking halfheartedly at the pancakes Cecil had been making, the ones he’d finished now cold. 

In the rush he’d left his phone upstairs, so it wasn’t as if you could message him about when he’d be back. 

You didn’t know when Harry would return either. Part of you toys with the idea of leaving a note or message for him to contact you when he gets back, just so you could go home and sidestep any possible awkward conversations. 

Just as you are considering what to write, the front door slams open with the kind of force that should have, but luckily didn’t, rip it off its hinges. 

Cecil bursts inside, wide eyed, sweaty, and panicked. He looks delirious, like he’s run twenty miles in the desert with no water. 

He almost doesn’t notice you sitting at the kitchen table as he falls inside, but he manages to stop his body from running up the stairs and grabbing his phone when he sees you. 

Your name falls out of his lips nervously, a whispered mumble that breaks a little at the end. His eyes teary. 

He takes a step forward, his hands twitching at his sides as he goes to reach out for you, but he stops himself. 

“She’s not pregnant.”

You don’t get a chance to answer as all his words come out in a rush of sound. 

“She’s not pregnant, I promise, look I even got the doctor to give me proof.” He pulls out a folded piece of paper from his jeans. “It’s got her signature and the doctor’s contact info, you can check it all online too, make sure it’s real. She said you can call her to confirm that Danielle’s not pregnant, I explained to her, to the Doctor, she was really nice, she said she’d talk to you and-”

“Cecil,” you say softly as you stand and take his shaking hands in yours. “It’s okay.”

“Danielle– we slept together a few times about two months ago, but I always used a condom, always, and they didn’t break. And then we stopped hanging out because she’s…”

You wait, giving him space to finish as you stroke his hand.

“She’s kind of mean, and then we don’t talk, she blocks me and suddenly a few weeks ago she messages me saying she’s pregnant and I’m the Dad and I need to send her all this money.” He looks up at you hopefully. “I, I don’t have that kind of money… She wanted me to go to the first doctor’s appointment and, I think she really did think she was pregnant, but she wasn’t. And, and she told me the date, it was next week. For sure. I remember, I have the message, I can show you. It wasn’t today. Otherwise… otherwise…”

“It’s okay.” You give him a reassuring smile and take the doctor’s letter out of his hands and place it on the table. 

“You hate me…” His voice completely breaks at the end, his face crumpling as the dam bursts and tears start to flow. 

“Shh, shh, shh,” you wrap your arms around him quickly, holding him close and squeezing him tight. You rub his back as he weeps into you, burying his face into your neck. “How could I hate you, hmm?” You kiss his temple and he cries harder. 

“You hate my kisses that much? They make you cry?” You tease lightly, trying to cheer him.

He shakes his head rapidly, still sobbing, but trying to stop. “I love them.” He insists through tears. 

“Yeah?” You kiss his temple again, and then his cheek.

“Yeah, yes, I love them so much, I love you.” He blurts out and then sobs harder in the beat of silence that follows. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m-”

“Shhh,” you lean back so you can hold his face in both of your hands and look into his eyes. “Why are you sorry, sweet thing?” 

“I, I, I,” he hiccups and swallows trying to force his tears down. “I thought you’d be gone and never speak to me again, and I ran all the way here back from the doctor’s because I didn’t want to be in the car with her for a second longer, and you hate me and now I said I love you and I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

You stroke his cheeks with your thumbs and kiss his lips lightly. His breathing hitches. 

“Cecil,” you say softly, “take a seat and I’ll get you some water.” 

He shakes his head, “Can I hold your hand while you get water?” 

You smile, your chest heavy and you nod. 

He holds your bicep, pressing his forehead against your shoulder as you fill a glass. He sits when you guide him to the table and takes the water when you offer it. He drinks quickly, trying to swallow as much as possible to please you. 

“Hey, don’t choke.” You say gently, taking the glass out of his hands - half full - and sit down next to him. 

He looks at you sadly from under his wet lashes, little shudders of his cries echoing on his body. “I get it… if you don’t want to ever see me again.” 

“Cecil,” You stroke his hair and he presses his head to your hand, closing his eyes. “It’s okay. I promise.” 

His eyes snap open as he looks at you, confusion and shock plastered all over his face. “You…?”

“Me…?” You tease a little. 

“You don’t hate… you want to…?” 

“I want you dummy,” you smile and kiss him again gently, a soft brush of your lips to his.

He moves after you quickly, deepening in kiss and moaning softly. The moment he pulls back he’s crying again. “Sorry, sorry, sorry,” he waves his hand and wipes at his eyes, “happy tears, happy tears.”

“You’re so sweet.” You give his hand a little squeeze. 

He shakes his head. “I’m a piece of shit. I should have told you… I just didn’t…” He sighs, “I didn’t want to put you off. You’re already so kind and hot and put together, and I’m just-”

“Shh.” You grin and he smiles back. “Besides, we’re not… we never talked about being… you know. We never set any boundaries.” 

He nods. “I’d like to… be like… going steady.” 

You can’t help but giggle at the sincere way he says it, the honesty in his tone just causes joy to bubble in your chest. 

His smile widens as you laugh. “Is that a yes?” 

You nod. “Yes.” 

He grins wildly and kisses all over your face repeatedly until you're laughing so hard you almost can’t breathe. 

“Sorry, sorry,” he chuckles as he moves back. 

“Stop saying sorry.” 

“Sorry.” 

You snort and then pause. “Would you still like to come over to mine?” 

His eyes widen a little, glittering in the light. “Three day food and fuck weekend?” 

You let out a bark of laughter and nod. “Three day food and fuck weekend.” 

He kisses you again, sweetly this time. “I don’t deserve you.” He whispers against your lips.

“That’s okay. I don’t deserve you either.” 

Thank you for reading!

@pleasurebuttonwrites @raven-rk @campingwiththecharmings @alexxavicry @whatthefishh

@romanarose @strangerhands @saturn-rings-writes @lonelyisamyw-0love @queerponcho

@steven-grants-world  @eyelessfaces @angel-of-the-moons @minigirl87 @lunar-ghoulie

@silvernight-m @autismsupermusicalassassin @apesarecuul @reallyrallyauthor @basicalyrandom

@alwaysmicado @mangoslushcrush @marc-spectorr @spxctorsslxt @novarosewood 

@pygmi-cygni @hammerhead96 @emma23 @sub-aro @killerdollz

 @maplemind  @mwltwo @loonymagizoologist @dameronshandholder @queerly-anxious

@homuraak3mi @swiftiegirliepop @oscarssimp @milkypompon @eternallyvenus 

@mandytrekkie @lounilu @avengersinitiative2012 @pigeonmama @marcsb1tch 

@iolaussharpe-24 @chaithetics @DowBaStan @ominoose

If you'd like to be taken off the tag list please let me know here

[notmorbid]

woman, eating.

dialogue prompts from woman, eating: a literary vampire novel by claire kohda.

people have appalling night vision.

i've marked crosses where you need to sign.

where did you say you live? anywhere near ____?

you hate me, don't you?

you won't make it without me.

it's hard to know what's real with you.

i did everything for you. everything was for you.

i don't like eating alone.

god wouldn't want to help a demon survive, and that's what we are.

this place is beyond new beginnings.

what do you see yourself as?

demon is a subjective term.

i'm not very good at goodbyes. or any form of greeting, actually.

how are you? i miss you. i want to hear about your life.

everything in everyone's life is temporary.

just imagine i'm dead.

people are like flowers: seasonal, wilting, and finite.

am i the only other person who can see you?

it sounded like you were dragging a body across the floor.

we cannot have any more catastrophe.

don't talk back to me.

my body isn't mine. it isn't a good fit for me.

you were very human. that was what i liked about you.

you never told me how ___ died.

i have to do everything for you, don't i?

give it time. you just haven't found yourself yet.

i don't really get contemporary art.

i'm trying to figure out what i want to do with my life.

how come you stopped ____?

what does the winner get?

it's kind of like being a kid again.

i don't want to be walking too late.

just be careful.

watch out for ___.

we're the same.

sorry if i said anything bad or embarrassing.

everything looks different, but it's hard to pinpoint how.

i like your look.

will you swap with me? can i be you for a bit?

i guess i feel small. undervalued.

it's hard to see what's beautiful anymore.

taking is not good for the soul.

what are you doing? lost?

did i make you feel bad?

i feel like i've been standing completely still.

i'm not sure what i feel when i look at you.

sorry. i'm not good at talking about it.

what are you going to do?

i'm really sorry about the ____.

when you left, you took something of me with you.

i'm sorry. i don't know what's wrong with me.

life is a line, not a circle.

i think i like you.

i don't want to feel at home in the dark.

take me with you. please.

i can't take you with me.

memories make life.

move away. i'm dangerous.

i don't know who i am anymore.

are you high or something?

i don't think i ever hated you.

can i do anything to help?

i wish i could be honest.

i don't want to bring you down with me.

i can't tell what it is i want.

the other night was a mistake.

you don't like me?

i am completely alone.

will you let me in?

i think i've known for a while.

you can't just listen to one side and block out the other.

neither side of me can be separated from the other.

i don't have sides at all. i am two things that have become one thing.

are you okay? do you need help getting home?

i'm not sure what i am anymore.

for the first time, i feel like i'm exactly where i'm meant to be.

this feels like the first time i've really seen you.

[glitchychara]

Amnesia

Tyler One Shot, 3,384 words

I really hate puzzles. It's weird, because I'm more of a problem solving girl, but puzzles just piss me off for some reason. I hate TVs too. I don't know what it is about them, but they just bug me. Mario's always watching some stupid thing on the TV, which kinda makes me wanna smash it to pieces with a hammer. Again, it makes no sense to me since I don't mind playing video games with them, even when I keep losing to everyone because I've never played before. It's just the TV in general, I guess. Although I recently learned my biggest trigger is TV static. I don't know why, but I get weird flashbacks everytime I hear it. Even though it was only once since I've been here. I started seeing images and they filled up my head and I didn't know what was going on and then someone reached out and I couldn't see who it was so I swung but it turned out to be Meggy so she blocked me and she asked me if I was okay and then-

And then I got up. And I left. And I came back a few hours later. And they never brought it up. Nor have I heard any TV static since. 

But anyways, Meggy and Smg4 took me to the doctor yesterday, which I don't know why a centaur would wanna be in the medical field, nor did I trust the guy, but at least he was gonna tell me exactly what was wrong with me….until he gave me my doctors note and it was literally a scribble. Like, excuse me sir, what the HELL is this supposed to be? Chicken scratch?? Anyways I gave it to the axolotl looking guy who was working at the pharmacy and somehow HE KNEW WHAT IT SAID?? I swear I'll NEVER understand doctors. Anyways, he gave me this bottle of pills and sent me on my merry way. Guess who STILL doesn't know what's wrong with her? Me :). So I figured I'd Google what the pills were for and guess what? Apparently I have something called “Amnesia” which, according to Google, means “permanent or temporary memory loss.” 

Huh??

add “doctors” and “pharmacists” to the list of things I hate.

I talked to Three recently, and he asked me if I was going to get my own house. I told him I didn't plan too. “Why not?” he asked, stacking cups next to the coffee machine. I shrugged and continued my task-cleaning out the new pastry display. “Smg4 lets me live in his guest room for free. Why would I wanna pay for a house?” He laughed and asked if I wanted to live with him forever. “Well, not forever, obviously. Just until I go home.” I replied, now adding pastries to the display case. “Tyler. About that…” I turned and looked at him, confused. It was the first time I've ever seen him look sad. “Tyler, you don't even know where you're from. How do you plan on getting home if you can't remember how you got here? Might as well get used to living in the Mushroom Kingdom, you know.” I rolled my eyes and ignored him. What would he know? I'm completely fine living in the castle. It's not like Smg4 does much anyways, other than making videos. Which he should make better, by the way. I mean, he lacks creativity, and a story in general. The whole point of making something is to entertain your audience. How is he going to do that if he's so focused on his “it doesn't have to be perfect” bs? I swear, some people don't deserve their fame, or money, or power or reviews or stars. 

5. stars.

What am I saying? I don't know anything about true art. I've never even made anything myself. Maybe those doctors were right.

Damn Amnesia…

(tagging @its-a-me-mango and @psychologistlemon bc I thought you guys being the doctor/pharmacist was funny)

[bunnihearted]

i hate that im scared of complimenting ppl bc i have prettyyy much always been rejected in everything and that's why i have avpd 🙃 it doesnt make sense to normal ppl i know but im literally terrified of calling someone pretty or saying that idk i like their shirt or they're cool or whatever. im genuinely soooo scared of even saying nice things. because for some reason im so off-putting and repulsive the nice things i've had to say to ppl are only weird and unwelcomed 🙃 so most of the times i wont say anything nice or supportive or comforting because im scared that i'll upset them. when i actually do give someone a compliment im either out of there asap and wont listen to their response or im just sitting there shaking waiting for them to get mad bc i said they were pretty or cool 🙃

[valewritessss]

Guys I just found an account that is dedicated to being anti percabeth and anti annabeth and only making content about that

I’m so happy I don’t feel so much hatred towards something fictional that I make a whole account to be negative about that thing instead of just finding things I do like and being positive about those

[rutadales]

Seeing a lot of twitter refugee posts about Tumblr etiquette, here's all you need to know (in my experience)

People will assume ur a bot if u don't have an icon, get an icon. if u need one but don't know where to one a lot of artists here are totally chill if you use creds

Dreblr is for c!dream positive fans, dreamblr or dtblr is for cc! centric stuff, but there is a lot of overlap in the community

NEVER!!! tag any mcyt post Minecraft, the Minecraft fandom has it hard enough dont clog their tags

Personally I avoid the main tags like dsmp and mcyt bc the larger communities are pretty hostile to dream fans. our little corner is safe Godbless 🙏🙏

If you send anon hate ur a loser so don't do that

The rivals fans here are the coolest and nicest people in the world

People unfollow and block all the time, if someone blocks u it's not personal do not stress over it. Blocking is everyone's best friend

No one cares about ships here this is not twitter

You can be blocked even on anon, so again, don't be weird

There is no algorithm so there's no shadow banning or anything like that. Most posts are spread by reblogs so a lot of fan creators on here really prefer reblogs over likes. Idrc either way and in my experience dreblr has been some of the best about reblogging compared to other fandoms but ya know, just to be aware why you might see reblogs>likes on someone's post

Don't stress about notes or followers, it can be cool to get a lot but not at all something worth worrying over

Here's a screenshot of my dashboard settings, follow my footsteps I've been on Tumblr forever this will give you the best user experience (or mess around to find what works for u ;P also yes I use the pumpkin color scheme it pleases me)

[jamiethebee]

I don't know what to think, but of the League who made it to the second half of the manga, Spinner is the only one who's family backstory/circumstances we never hear of.

Dabi is a Todoroki

Toga's parents rejected her

Twice's died

Compress has his family legacy

Shigaraki is a Shimura

Spinner is ??? Does he have siblings?? Parents? Grandparents? Anyone? No one? An orphan? We get nothing about him specifically, nothing that can't be related (or parallels drawn) with other characters.

And with the weakest quirk of the League, he's left alive? Like he's not even a threat to the heroes as himself? The complete lack of care that he's given in the story is...

[g0thsoojin]

🤍💬2

[daz4i]

i think that unless you're talking about stuff that's like purposely and maliciously created with the goal of endangering people (e.g. nazi propaganda or cult recruiting etc) you should probably retire the term "irredeemable media". like i don't think this cartoon meant for children or niche webcomic or barely known indie game are as dangerous as you think they are

[altruistic-meme]

............ i want to come out.

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

not my online friend trying to have the "not all zionists" conversation with me rn

[bunnihearted]

🧸♡ ⋆｡˚

[zannolin]

gonna be brave and work on outlining perhaps

[always-a-slut-4-ghouls]

On tumblr when you post you’re just playing Russian roulette with your post getting attention, but it’ll probably get ignored.

On Reddit any comment you make outside of some very niche community will immediately have someone downvoting you and calling you like, three different insults. Then they will wonder why you only log in every couple months. Like, it’s a very helpful website when you have a question for another community you’re in, but you’ll also get someone being immediately hostile when you make an innocuous post on a garden subreddit 😑

At least on tumblr people have to actually seek out your random ass text posts and go out of their way to start shit, and you don’t have the up and down vote system that feels like playing with my self confidence and worth issues.

Both websites are toxic part of the time (what social media isn’t?) and both are actually more useful for weird people, but holy shit does Reddit feel more aggressive about shit. Maybe it’s just the devil you know, but at least on this mess of a website half your hate will be for the most random shit and misunderstandings that people have to seek out finding if your blog is a normal size. Reddit is either posting on a dead sub or getting immediately thrown to the, well, sharks and wolves aren’t actually super aggressive towards humans under normal circumstances, so something else that could tear you apart instantly for just existing in the same space as them.

[starswallowingsea]

god i hate living with my parents. "We're doing this for you. You need to get a job that can pay for your insurance because when you turn 26 you're getting dropped off of ours." I know this. I have known this since I was 16 and it has been looming over my head. I happen to like my summer job though and unfortunately it's hard to find winter seasonal work in a similar field and it's not like the parks are looking for more full time people. I'd love to be the second person in our costuming department just making clothes and helping out with that full time but unfortunately its not in the fucking budget to do that and keep me on as an interpreter. I might see if I can get in there for a winter job and find an apartment though just because living with my parents makes me want to constantly blow something up or throw something. I hate this stupid country and I hate how my parents don't seem to see that I'm just so fucking lost and drowning and I hate that I feel like I can't talk to them about this because they'll just talk down to me instead of trying to help me.

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

Chapter 10 done \o/