#bitch live ur life!!!!
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There will not be a single moment next week in which Iām not running around doing something
#full time studying / volunteering at the refugee center / volunteering at two clinics#literally ab to have a meeting ab shadowing a doctor whoās researching ftd dementia in like 50 minutes#organic chemistry research 5 days a week bc ur bitch is trying to get published#hitting the gym 6 days a week. Iāll probably have to move it to mornings soon#meal prep#trying to snag a lowkey part time job#trying to read 30 minutes before bed#somehow have 2 fit a social life into this#Iām excited bc I finally feel like my time budgeting abilities are being put to the test BUT holy fuck .#studying will be my no 1 priority always. literally catch me doing anki cards in any pocket of free time I have#but I better live up to the challenge of juggling everything else too#ik I got this. and these are all things im choosing to do. not things I have to do#and I love being busy so itāll be so fun#just had to be in awe for a second bc I used to admire girls whoāre like this. and I am officially about to be one of them#p
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i am not immune to launchpad sol and albin thoughts
#ramble tag#its so like. okay.#launchpad was when they 'peaked'. best years of their lives#the . i think what we canonically know happened at launchpad was like.#laquidditch (fun!) christmas special adventures (fun!)#and then . also#getting deeply bullied. sol lightly kidnapped to launchpad. lizer. claudius. 'you made us run until we threw up' 'im pretty sure he got off#on torturing kids'. literally what the fuck was their deal#getting stuck in a spiders web ???? for a semester ?????#......??? getting chased down by a vaccum cleaner ..........#'it got a lot darker near the end' ... fun pretend child endangerment#like . man.#not to sound CRAZY or anything. does anyone get the impression launchpad was like. a bad ? time ? for them ?? like. it just straight up. bad#by god does it rlly sound to me like#the feeling of when high school was so bad it made ur life a living hell to be in. and u were truly just. surviving#but then youd b goofing off w ur friends in a little dorm. and the stress and the exhaustion seems to color everything that isnt that.#in a beautiful hazy rosy golden film#it hurt but the hurt was monotonous and dull. so all u remember were those shining bright in betweens#sol and albie sneaking into the kitchen and enchanting the self moving cookingware and just seeing what happens#and watching mothership approved saturday morning cartoons in bed#and studying together late at night n sol tucks albin in after hes crashed from hiss allnighter#and passing notes in class#and all that free time over crittermas breaks to do stupid dares and long rambling conversations abt nothing#sol knits albie his first sweater#they have their first beer together#they come back after a really bad day for the both of them and lie on the floor and talk abt anything but that#albin practices spells on sol and its not a good or safe idea but its probably fine#albin pettily bitching about his assigned partner for an arcana class project and sol blindly tsking his side always#only wizards can check out library books and albie checks out all sols books for him#...... anyway
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aye can i get a fuckin uuuhhhh
break. on my burger
#shit chat#family cw#got sicker than i have been in years my bank closed my checking account on accident work is nightmarishly busy#and my mother is sending strings of long voice memos in the family group chat again#i simply will not be listening to them. at most i'll ask my dad or brother for the sparknotes version#bc her pattern for the better part of this year has been radio silence. no attempt at communication whatsoever#and then BAM like 5-10 min worth of voice memos screaming crying sobbing shaking#I DON'T KNOW WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO GET MY CHILDREN TO FORGIVE ME. I'M CRAWLING ON MY KNEES ON THE DESERT FOR A HUNDRED YEARS REPENTING#WHAT THE FUCK IS FAMILY FOR YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING AND I'M SUFFERING SO MUCH AND I'M ALONE BECAUSE#MY FAMILY ABANDONED ME. I HAVE NO ONE. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT I'M BEGGING. I NEED HELP I NEED MY KIDDOS AROUND ME PLEASE I'M DYING#followed by several minutes of sordid updates on her shitty miserable life#which is tbf pretty shitty & miserable. she's extremely physically disabled & mentally ill#her partner had a severe stroke a couple months ago and is still recovering. they've both been in & out of hospital#neither working. partner's adult son who lives with them is the only income in the household#partner's permanently disabled mother also lives with them. plus 2 large dogs 6 cats and 3 each of chickens & ducks#they're in court suing their landlord bc he's trying to evict them but the property is an uninhabitable shithole to begin with#but like. whenever i do make the mistake of responding to one of her groupchat tantrums#she's just like 'oh you know me im a survivor :) i just miss yous is all :) now that you're here i'm gonna bitch about my life for an hour#and ignore everything you have to say and show active disdain & boredom whenever you tell me anything about yourself or your life :)'#and if i offer help she refuses it#like it's just a bid for attention. expecting unconditional love and absolution and salvation from us bc That's What Families Do#she doesn't actually seem to give a shit about any of us as real people. just this ironclad delusion of unconditional family support#that she frankly has not earned#my brother actually did go visit her in the hospital on thanksgiving. driving 2hrs out of his way to do so#and she was a raging passive aggressive bitch to him and threw the gift he'd brought her back in his face#ma'am i know you're Going Through It but so are the rest of us & frankly you've given me zero reason to want to interact w/ ur caustic ass#plus this is petty but yet another way in which she doesn't listen to me & makes no attempt whatsoever at genuine relationship#i've told her numerous times that responding to groupchat voice memos is hard for me. that i love & miss her#and if she wants to see me or needs help or whatever to please contact me one on one either by call or text#nope. refuses to respond to/initiate individual contact. ONLY traumadumping in the fam chat. TLDR MY MOM IS A DISFUNCTIONAL TOXIC NIGHTMARE.
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EY you silly nosy man i LoVe yOu SM but pls let them have their father-son bonding/reunionš
#maybe he's jealous?š¤ or maybe he could tell hj was feeling uncomfortable and offered him an outš¤#the way eunyung is just so shameless and non-chalant in these situations sends me (in a very endearing way)#like Yes You Go Girl. go be a problematic bitch and live ur best life#no home#no home manhwa#ģ§ģ“ ģģ“#webtoon#eunyung baek#haejoon goh#ey hj parallels
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girl help im trying to fight the urge to consume problematic media
#at least i think its problematic? people on tiktok have said so a while ago#anyways.#wanna know what it is#its#ranfren#so uh tell me what to do#in the notes#do i consume the media and get weird or do i go on w/ life#the urge grows stronger every day and im fighting for my LIFEEEEE here#ok im done rambling. post#nevermind im not done ramblkng . im back bitches. i lived#i have the urge to scream just a little bit#the longer i go trying to suppress the interest the more it keeps fuckin me up#its like oobleck but worse and also can shape itself into something that hurts#like if oobleck had fists#the more pressue i put on it the more pressure kt puts on me#FUCKIN VOODOO OOBLECK#VOOBLECK??#voobleck#or voodoobleck??????#im not choosin. callkn g it both instead#anyways i have the song california gurls stuck in my head and its 4:21am and jm tired goodnihjt eveeyone hgnzghrfngzzzzzzhzhhhzhznzmmzbzz#snork mimimimimi#honk shoo honk shoo#etc.#gnightm everjlnhye#california girls were unforgettable daisy dukes bikinis on top syn kissed skin so hot well melt ur popsicle uouou o uououo#clifornia girls weee undeniable fune fresh fiefde ww got it ln loxk weat coast eepewse t how mur youy hand up uouou o uououo#etc. etc. yeag goodnight
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I love my best friend so much literally want to chew that girl and swallow her so she resides in my intestines like fr
#riv rambles#we randomly talked once and deadass have been talking every single day since then#I could tell her the grass is pink and sheād be like no ur right I think itās been looking a little pink too#jk weāre not that delusional but#literally sheās so cool so funny so smart like so smart you guys donāt even know how smart sheās so genius that brain of hers is huge and#so lovely and she is just. the coolest. the coolest. I mean it sheās the coolest#and I love her I want to squish her into a ball and bounce her does that make sense#and#idk#I just love that bitch#sheās my fav human ever ever ever ever and I never get to see her bc she lives states away but she is my person you guys donāt even know#so crazy how I went my whole life without her until just a few yrs ago#if she got no fans Iām DEAD#6 feet under#if sheās got 0 lovers I have been erased from existence and deleted from the universeās records of life forms#and sometimes sheās horribly naive and stupidly bad at putting her foot down and my hair starts balding but#I will rock the bald head for her sake idc#thatās my girlie literally soulmate we are true soulmatism
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*gently takes your hands* Tumblr is no better than Twitter. There is a swath of negativity, holier than thou, stuck up attitude on this website just like there is on Twitter. At least on Twitter, people like that are called what they are: trolls. Do not feed the trolls. There is literally no reason to log onto this website to feed the machine of doomerism and negativity, then pretend we're better than other sites because "we touch grass." I assure you, majority of the blogs in every tag you can imagine, are not touching grass.
#nym speaks#I was thinking about this last night#every time I log in here everyone seems unhappy#If I look in the tags for posts about a shiny new thing it's filled with people bitching about it or throwing tantrums or harassing other#ppl. that's not a great way to live lmao. hiding behind ur manufactured moral ocd doesn't make you an enlightened person putting down#corrupt bloggers...some of y'all are just trolls and you think you can get away with harassing real life people (strangers!)#because you think what you're saying is right!!!!#when I was giffing the other night and this isn't rlly related#but kind of it is#I was like. Oh I shouldn't gif this no one will like that I'm including Damerey#and like fuck that attitude man#a lot of you are just burning yourselves out for no goddamned reason#and signing yourself up for a very miserable time and life#I cannot FATHOM wanting fandom to simply be nothing but temper tantrums and harassing people#you aren't any better than dudebro trolls!!!!!!!#'art is dying' 'x franchise is dying' YOUR INTEREST IS DYING#tHAT IS LITERALLY IT#no more no less!!! accept that and move on!!!!#my motto in life is to be relentlessly positive#that doesn't mean I don't kvetch or criticize when it's earned#but I've lived a hard enough life that I know the importance of small joys#and not leaving room for people who just want to make you miserable in it
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mfw i was watching a video by a white trans girl and she just got very racist out of nowhere
#she was talking about how a ton of ppl were being shitty to her for being non passing so i was like girl live ur life i support u#and then BAM she hits me with the 'just let me listen to my white bitch music'. man#no white girl you cant say that i was rooting for u...#being a black trans girl must be so unbelievably ass every transfem e celeb has at least one racism moment#š½
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No, actually what is wrong with some ppl in this fandom???? 0 reading comprehension, 0 media literacy, 0 brain cells in that head of theirs. One thing I will never get is watching smth u DONT like or running around shitting on it to ppl who CLEARLY like that media??? Like omg. Why r u such a fuckin loser?? And going around screaming ur unwanted opinions while no one asked for it AT ALL. Telling others u can write better than the creators...??? I WOULD LIKE TO SEE U TRY, BITCH. no cos u don't know the ACTUAL process of writing and what it takes to be a writer... And u can't even respect someone's HARDWORK and efforts. U think u can run around saying stupid shit without thinking twice AROUND the FANS that CLEARLY enjoy the show???! I miss when ppl were allowed to like a thing without everyone jumping their asses just bc they wanna hate on smth so bad. How about u try finding smth u LIKE instead of shoving ur unwanted opinions and thoughts about a show in our faces when no one asked for it.
GOD. HELP ME. UGH.
#Delete later#YEAH THIS IS ABOUT THE ML FANDOM#Ngl I wanna bitch slap some ppl#This is pathetic#Yall are actual losers#Genuinely how r most of yall older than me??? They were right age is just a number. Cos ur dumb behavior at that big ol' age???#Literally EMBARRASSINGGGGGGG#I feel bad for u#That's actually sad#Go find smth u actually enjoy and leave ppl tf alone#U live once. Stop harrassing others and live ur life instead of being a bother. GOD.#UGHHHHHHHHHHHJHHHHHHHHHH#kai talks#text post#ml fandom salt
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my life if i got to live on college campus and make actual attempts at friendship instead of being stuck at home because its too expensive
#sorry i got a taste of what my life COULDVE looked like this summer and now im. back to same old and depressed about it lol.#if i start bitching more on here blame school starting bc i go back tomorrow......... yaaaay..........#this is the part of life where ur supposed to make meaningful relationships and YET ššššššshoot me#ALL OUR LIVES IF WE COULD LIVE IN TOWNS WITH COMMUNITIES AND SHIT. beating capitalism to death with hammers#skulltxt
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i hate living here
#i havent talked to my mom literally all day and she came home and is just PISSED at me#like. what the fuck#also. also! shes pissdd that i have ocd that SHE gave me#the definition of homegirl i get it from u!!!#and ive dealt with urs my whole fucking life!!!! and when mine gets worse u fucking hate me#why did u have a kid!!!!#what did u expect!!!#and uve literally never let me do anything in this house and now when i dont volunteer to like clean or move stuff ur surprised#bitch u threw my barbies down the stairs when i was a kid#bc i drew on one of those black felt things (do u know what i mean? i cant remember what they were)#and then touched them without washing my hands#YOUUUU made me this way and our living situation this way#YOUUUUU were the adult#(this isnt to say im like. nasty and not cleaning anything. this happened bc i didnt put the coffee maker back together)#like she wouldnt have ripped my head off if she hadnt wanted it put together#i dunno. just hate it here#and i wanted to rant but i hate to rant to my boyfriend about her bc the nuance to understand what shes like is ridiculous#hence all. ^^^ that.#and yet i dont leave because i dont want to leave her alone#because sometimes we're like best friends. which i dont GET#bc its like u hate me and then sometimes ur happy to have me around#i dont know. anyway.#love u if u read all this <3#tw parents#tw abuse#<- maybe? just in case#rebeccaspeaks
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I went to my 30 yr high school reunion last night and two grown assed women got into a fight and got kicked out of the restaurant. We are all 48. Who has the time to fight at 48 years old? The popular girls is who. One of them wore sunglasses inside at night. The whole time. The other one, full of Botox, told the whole party that sunglasses was ātrashā.
Weāre 48.
Donāt peak in high school, babies.
#I put this here because itās the safest social for this kind of bitching#and I need to tell everyone#like I cannot believe that Iām complaining about this and yet#I wanted to punch a theatre girl who decided she was in charge#there is a LOT more that I need to complain about and this place is my only safe space#omg#my advice is to live your life in a way that people donāt want to punch you at your 30 ur reunion
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m'gonna fight eddie's dad. btw.
#live#liv reads foi#LITTLE BITCH!!! COMPLICATING MY BOYFRIEND'S LIFE!!!#UR A SHITTY DAD AL#i would stand up to him i would protect eddie#me and wayne#we'd kick al's ass together
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what if instead of messaging me in the middle of the night about your stupid fucking girlfriend and your stupid fucking problems with her you actually act like my fucking friend and message me like how you message everyone else in our group
#bye ignore my venting bigger problems what fucking ever#im sick of her ass she only messages us for us to help her with her fucking girlfriend problems like we arent even friends atthis fckn point#and i love her shes so funny whatever but god shes literally the worst because i just want to be friends i dont fucking care ab her goddamn#selfish ass gf thats shes obsessed with. be obsessed tell me about it but cant we be friends ab other stuff too#we used to be her 'favorite friend' cause we shared so many interests and we hung around what fucking ever but fuck that right#get a gf and just use us to help better yalls relationship without even telling her you're sharing her private msgs w us huh yeah sure#what fucking ever im so done with this bitch and i cant even get my contacts out cause i have long nails and im js poking my eye#AND SHE WOULD NEVER BE SORRY if our friendship fell apart she would tell everyone i was jealous of her gf or what ever i literally dont care#she was like an older sister before i dont get why getting a gf would have to change shit like ok good for u but what ab us#what about me its not even fucking fair like is it that hard to keep up w ur friends?? NO its fucking not#taking me so long to write a post bc im still fucking helping her with her stupid dumb selfish idiotic gf omfg#just BREAK UP i literally dont fucking care just leave her if she makes u unhappy its literally online tf is she gonna do to u nothing omfg#why am i the one being punished when shes the one with the stupid dumb gf that hates her and herself i dont fucking care i js want m friend#and i cant tell any of our mutual friends cause she dont do that to them its js me so itd be like im being dramatic#and like shit i guess i am but i dont care atp thats all she ever talks to me ab like ok i get it i helped u but stop jfc#but if i said that we'd never talk again bc what fucking ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cause im just dramatic whatever#if u cant resolve these simple problems of communication on ur own then maybe u shouldnt be in a relationship idk js my thoughts! die#sry the 1 person who knows what xactly i mean is asleep and im so tired of getting late night msgs being like hii can u help me SHUT UP#id love to help if we were actually still fucking friends but we arent so js leave me alone bruh#post#nickpost#will delete in morning my mom keeps telling me to put my phone down bt i need 2 say smfh 2 some1#i hate change i hate slight differences in my normal day to day i hate everything i hate not having smth to rely on i hate change i hate it#sry im alg now im js sick of her ass js leave bruh#nimbhe my moms yelling im tired anyway i need to js isolate myself forever no problems if im on an island alone#living my best life in the shade drinking idk water or whatever and just talking to myself bc who even needs friends right!!!!!!!!#its 11:11 make a wjsh#adding more cz whatever im deleting this ltr anyway#its so clear where i stand with everyone cause its always close but not close enough friendly but not friends and i guess its the same w her#bye im out of tags etc whatever nobody matching my freak ever never comfortable in any friendships
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"it's ableist to be scared of losing your memory" bestie what the fuck are you talking about. ur all giving me diarea
#actuallydissociative#did/osdd#y this shit on my dash#''people with memory loss are real people'' and????#im seeing a really weird trend in targeting people with ocd and health anxiety etc with this shit specifically#when they aren't even being ableist about their fears (which ofc is also a thing) but like theyre literally just#saying it's a fear that is taking over their life#people saying theyre scared of losing their mental faculties and autonomy are not automatically painting mentally ill ppl negatively#chat am i ableist for being prepared to kms if I ever get diagnosed w alzheimers as someone who already has amnesia#like. the people ur making up dumbass discourse about are real people with real lives and problems. please calm down#there is more going on in relation to this too like the healthcare system being shite#there is a difference between telling ppl its not a death sentence vs bitching about how theyre problematic#for being scared of an objectively scary life experience
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i wear a lot of skirts and pink and whatnot as my style has developed with me & my personality but when one of those age regression girlies latch onto me....i do not like that
#like oh....you think im one of them...bestie no im freshly 23 and im happy i made it this far i dont wanna go back#sometimes i hate being 5'2 with a small frame you have to be very careful and kinda vet everyone you interact with#idk there's a complex discussion to be had. i am someone who has went through what they fetishize and i know a lot of girls in that#community have too. so i worry a lot if if my behaviors and preferences accidentally align with that community in ways i don't realize#bc trauma will always reveal itself. idfk. when i was 20 i got in a relationship with a man who was 30 because i misheard him and thought#he was 24. i thought he was okay until we were at this giftshop and he wanted to get me something but as giftshops are super expensive#i mentioned i could fit in childrens clothes and it saves me a lot of money ($60 shoes are $30 for kids) and tbh fit my frame better#so he was āprove itā so i did and mf said āTHATS HOTā ??????????? BITCH#my style wasn't even feminine in the slightest at the time š it feels like a curse to have this kind of trauma then never outgrow this body#believe me ik how trauma changes your brain but how#as a woman#can you ever be apart of that community? why do you allow this to continue and not persecute these men for existing?#you're inherently enabling it and saying its okay this happened to you and its okay that other adults can hurt other kids#when my rapist got put in prison i screamed i yelled i sang i danced my friends set off FIREWORKS for me#when he got out i cried more than i ever have. i moved STATES (not the sole rzn but nonetheless) not that i was in the one he was in prison#in anyways but i was so fucking petrified he'd find me again. its embarrassing but i started sleeping with a chastity belt again.#i made more phone calls i ever have in my life to people who have and will get their hands dirty#i understand the self hatred those girls have. i understand the girls who sleep with everyone to take some of their power back.#i even understand the girls who want to get raped if they got assaulted but it never felt like enough for the pain they're experiencing#but please stay the fuck away from me. as someone who has tried to heal and wants every man like that erased from earth.#do not give them an ounce of attention. ostracize them like they're meant to be. leave it to god for their karma they will be dealt with#reckon with your pain and make sure it never happens to anyone else. only the harmed can make the greatest teachers#tbh bro i am disgusted with myself at all that those are the kinda vibes i put out.#what are you supposed to do as a woman when feminity is equalized with infantilism? i think its tone deaf and misguided whem girls are like#i dress this way to contradict societies views!!! babes its a whole cultural issue that requires reviewing and reforming#you are not doing anything revolutionary by wearing frilly skirts and saying im not like them bc they see you and ur automatically boxed in#i dress how i want and say what i want but i know as a individual im not the beacon of a groundbreaking movement#singularily flipping society on its head. dress how you want but be aware of the connotations. you're living in this society here and now#there's consequences that may not be in your favor and youll be assumed to have values that dont align with you and it may break your heart
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