#been reading her stuff since 2009

[briebysabs]

Mochijun is amazing and I feel like ppl don’t understand how much she’s worked. PH began in 2006, had long chapters a minimum of 40 pages. I wasn’t there for the run but to release 104 chapters in 9 years you can assume there were almost no breaks. If you’ve read Brocante which is a sketchbook that comes with special edition of vol 11 (I strongly recommend getting it if you can). You would know she’s been planning VnC from 2009-2015. So essentially for 6 out of those 9 years of PH’s run mochijun was working on two manga at the same time. That’s crazy.

And mind you, she didn’t take that long of a break after PH. It ended in March of 2015 I believe and then she had to compose the PH final artbook soon after. And vnc started in December. And went on with few breaks until a few years ago. Then you include supervising the 2009 ph anime and VnC’s anime when they came out. Then include the ph and vnc collab, the ph 15th anniversary cafe, the now mochijun 20th anniversary online lottery. Then you include interviews, signings, covers of GJ magazines. She worked on a shoujo rei MV. She makes all the additional items that come with volumes. I think she released 3 light novels for PH (though idk if she wrote them or overlooked its creation by another writer). There’s likely stuff I forgot depending on her role in stage plays. Or art she did in miscellaneous magazines or art she did for other creators. Or much more I just don’t know about. Jun Mochizuki is not a company or a small studio. She has assistants thank god but most of this will fall on one woman.

I know it’s sad we haven’t gotten vnc since April but firstly, we got a lot of shit in April. So the hiatus is sad but I’m not surprised. And honestly when I found out she worked on ph and vnc around the same time, I was so shocked she hadn’t broken down for that long. On a final note, both PH and VnC are not simple manga with straight-forward plots. They have so much planning and detail and foreshadowing placed into them. She gave us two complex manga basically back to back.

[fancyfade]

Objectively correct list on which Batfam members would swear

Bruce: no clue if he swears canonically or not outside of miller's all star b&r, but he should not. Look I am very opinionated on this. I do not think Bruce swears. Bruce values control over his own mind so much you know he would not want to do things that would make him look as if he is not in control of himself, even when he is not in control of himself. However, I do imagine that teenage bruce swore, as when Damian cusses Alfred out Alfred is like "Ah, memories" or something. Bruce was an angry teenager.

Damian: Canonically swears and would swear. him meeting the batfam by cussing out alfred is iconic i will not hear a word against it. he can be mean to people without swearing, too, of course. he just has a lot of tools in his arsenal.

babs: look, does Barbara canonically gamer-rage? Not really*. but she deserves it let her swear in anger when people are doing stupid stuff.

dick: I don't think dick is opposed to swearing on principal, but I don't think we have a lot of panels of him doing it in proportion to how long he has been in comics and not done it. I imagine it being more of in the "What the fuck" instances like when something weird or unexpected happens (and only when he's an adult or teenager, b/c as younger robin he was doing the 60s exclamations or whatever that everyone did)

stephanie brown: like dick I don't imagine her being opposed to swearing but I don't see her doing it a ton. I see her doing it more often in anger, since she's got quite a lot of anger locked up pre-Batgirl 2009 and possibly still in batgirl 2009

cass: cass isn't opposed to swearing, but given her propensity for mimicking the speech she sees around her in batgirl 2000, I don't think she'd do it a ton until she sees it on the videos she watches to figure out how 'normal people' talk. then she does do it, though I imagine it's less in anger and more just casually, since i headcanon that cass gets less verbal the more overwhelmed emotionally she is (which... IIRC is supported by canon? She stopped talking at some point in batgirl 2000 when she was on the outs with Bruce if I recall, it's been a bit since i did a read through)

duke: duke is another character I don't see as opposed to swearing, but I don't think he does it out loud on account of his mom clearly not liking it (at least he doesn't do it around his mom, or didn't back before she got joker-ified XD). he does in his internal monologue though sometimes

Tim: Tim canonically censors his own internal monologue IIRC in Robin 1993 you know he does not swear. possibly inspired by whatever cheesy 50s/60s exclamations his icon dick grayson made when he was robin.

*We do see her yelling and saying things she'd regret over comms, but also saying things you regret is like batfam 101 if you don't do it they kick you out.

[witchhazelevesque]

I just finished rereading The Lost Hero and here are some notable things and stuff I’d forgotten:

Will had a quiver of arrows on his back when the trio arrived at camp- so his characterization was changed for BoO

Mr. D left a veritable forest of grapevines in the living room ‘to remember him by’

All the Hephaestus kids have Murphy beds except for Beckendorf/ Leo

3 Hypnos kids

Rachel has a prophecy pit crew that get her a stool and take care of her when she swoons from oracle business

Annabeth made an oath on the Styx to Jason not to tell anyone yet about Thalia being his sister

Piper is a really quick thinker

Jason is very good at reading people

Leo wishes Madea goes back to the fields of punishment “where she belonged” (resentful lil guy 💕)

Leo DID get to attend his mother’s funeral, glad to hear

In the 5th grade Leo made a ‘steam powered chicken chucker’ as a science project (precursor to the chicken nugget smoke screen mayhaps)

At least 12 Hephaestus kids at camp

At this point summoning lightning almost makes Jason pass out

There’s a parallel of Lityerses not being able to beat Jason’s Roman style sword fighting and the Romans not knowing how to combat Percy’s Greek style in SoN

Jason jokingly calls someone ‘General Eisenhower’, so a hint about him having military knowledge and knowing it so well he uses it as insults/jokes

He recognizes TV news broadcasts, so he prob watches those

Jason vaguely recognizes Piper’s dad in a picture because he has seen him in some movies

Piper calls Hedge by his first name by the end?? Leo uses Tempest as a power source- just plugs an electric saw into him and vroom vroom

Jason fought two different giants in the same day and both times literally went “guess I’ll die”

Jason refers to himself a praetor of the First Legion, though it is officially called the Twelfth Legion. Unclear if this is a mistake/ oversight or if it relates to Jason’s desire to change the Legion’s name that is later mentioned in SoN. Probably a mistake since it’s not brought up again to clear it up

Jason got back most of his memories, except for the location of Camp Jupiter (or the name actually)

Piper sleeps (at least once) with her dagger under her pillow

There’s a reference to 2009 and 2010 Party Ponies events

Hedge is Piper’s dad’s life coach

Piper tells Jason she’d follow him anywhere, paralleling how Frank later says he’d follow Percy anywhere

Chiron calls Lupa his ‘counterpart’

Leo was the one to figure out that Jason and Percy had been exchanged by Hera but then the story makes him forget this by the end to let Jason be the one to explicitly deliver that info??

[punkeropercyjackson]

Genuine advice for people who joined the Batfam fandom because of fan content and are too scared to get into actual comics or not sure where to start:Please don't buy a single word 'Fuck canon!' people tell you about ANY Batfam member and i do mean ANY.They're lying to you to get you to sanatize them and deprive you of deserving to know what they're actually like because their peabrains can't process multilayered characters and relathionships in favor of bigoted stereotypes and writing that's insanely insulting to them and if you're a minor especially,they're lying to you about whatever they say about shipping the male members with eachother not being in*cest or ped0 too-Bruce has been Dick's adoptive dad since Dick's debut issue,he legally adopted Jason and Duke too,Damian's his bio kid and with Tim it's a bit more complicated but it's very much canon that they see eachother as father and son and Tim has lived at Wayne Manor at several points in canon and would be brothers regardless of anything else due to this but they also use that exact word to describe their dynamic and so does everybody else

This applies to Cass being their sister too because Bruce adopted her after they formed a dad-daughter bond a while into her being Batgirl but as Stephanie has a mom she lives with and has never seen Bruce as a parental figure nor he her as one of his kids,you're freegame to ship her with Tim or Cass and in fact i highly encourage doing both.Batfanon stans are once again doing mass lying(damn they should get a different hobby)by saying the four male Robins are the 'core' ones.Stephanie has been included in Robin stuff for a long time now and Duke dosen't get the same treatment due to antiblackness so THAT'S an actual 'Fuck canon!' moment so you should make it six Robins and know that the intention with only four is always misogyny and whitewashing(also just saying but those fanarts are always ugly anyway,they make them look like shitty anime boys instead of themselves)

Dick is an almost perfect eldest sibling and the other Batkids deeply appreciate him for it,he was Tim's Robin and him and Cass are his favorite siblings,Duke is Jason's favorite brother and vice versa but he's also extremely close to Cass,none of them make Damian go through 'normal youngest sibling treatment' because none of them are normal so they grew a sense of basic decency and Damian's closest to Dick and Stephanie and Stephanie's a canon csa victim so kindly keep your paws off her with your 'date all of your s/os siblings' jokes because she has self-worth and class,thanks

Ignore the original Red Hood and The Outlaws run and anything to do with Jason and Roy friendship in fandom and read the original Teen Titans run,New Teen Titans,Arsenal 1998,The Titans 1999,Green Arrow 2001 and Outsiders 2003 if you want to understand Roy too or at least ask around blogs centered on him for context.Ignore Tom Taylor's Nightwing run and Teen Titans 2003 and Batgirl of Burnside and anything by Devin Grayson(she's quite literally done irreperable damage to Batman lore and i wish i was kidding).Read Robin 1993,90s Young Justice,Batgirl 2000,Batgirl 2009,Red Robin,Son of Batman and literally everything Duke's in which i can provide a reading list for instead and i'm working on a megapost of all the Jason media that's actually good so new fans don't waste their time.I'm genuinely saying this to be helpful because 'fandom isn't activism' is a puratical priviliged phrase that should've never existed just like Batfanon shouldn't either

[cuephrase]

Of the DC comics you've read so far, what would be your top recommendations for people to check out/what have you enjoyed the most?

when i tell you i have been thinking about this all day- i have been thinking about this. all. day.

so disclaimer, as of writing this, i have only read 31 runs from start to finish and 18 arcs/events outside of those runs. on top of, everything i've read so far has been strictly robin-centric, so dick, jason, tim, and damian. (i have read all of steph's robin appearances lol, but i haven't gotten to reading material for her, like say batgirl 2009, yet.) i've also decided not to rec from any run i'm currently reading, so for example, you won't see any batman: gotham knights recs here. because i'm most well-read on the robins, i'm only going to rec for them.

also, i'm going to operate under the following assumption: you've got a basic knowledge of the robins. none of these are where i would necessarily recommend anyone start reading about the boys, but i do think they'd be pretty interesting if you're already somewhat familiar with them and don't want to commit to reading whole character backlogs. does that make sense? i hope that makes sense.

alright, let's do this!

DICK GRAYSON

oh god. this one is actually so hard because he has so much great stuff, but then also i have like a love/frustrate relationship with so much of it. like for instance, i really enjoyed The New Teen Titans, but also lowkey can't stand space adventures so whenever that went down i was like 😀👍. but okay. hmmmm.

i have two preboot recs, with explanations + caveats.

devin grayson's mob!dick arc, so Nightwing 1996 #99-100, 107-117. caveats: it doesn't really get to finish playing out/wraps up weird because of editorial changes/infinite crisis. but!! it's a super interesting look at how dick handles...failure. how he values himself in light of that failure.

tomasi's run, but specifically #147-153. (listen, i love the dick and tim moments in 'freefall' but the whole eternally pregnant lady thing was too weird.) this is classic, hyper-competent dick, okay? he's such a bad-ass. and an idiot- bro literally flops his severely injured ass over the bars of his glider and rides it UNCONSCIOUS back to the batcave. i can't with him. poor alfred. anyways, he deals with two-face, always a good time. and then at the end, as a treat, he cries because bruce is dead. so fun!! what was my caveat here? oh yeah, he has a girlfriend. i don't remember her name, she serves like...very little purpose, the whole relationship is very minor/background okay, but like it was so unnecessary. he can be single, dc, it's okay.

for post re-boot, just read tom taylor's run!! it's the best thing ever!! zero complaints!!

HA. yeah, just kidding. that run is very like/frustrate for me lol. oh man i'm struggling here. it's not all bad okay, i'm just really picky, and i haven't re-read any nightwing n52 and onwards since my first foray into comics (8 months ago) so my memories of these are the foggiest and i'm not sure how i feel about all of it in light of what i've read now. yk what, i'm just going to...not rec anything. sorry!!

JASON TODD

his comics either go so hard or they're absolute ass, why is there no in between. istg, i can't figure out why writers struggle with him so much?? well. i mean, i do have theories. but you didn't ask for those!

pre-boot:

detective comics #569-574. robin!jason in the hands of writers who like him is so much fun. which, don't get me wrong, i don't flat-out hate how starlin writes him, but i think you get a more well-rounded view of jason as robin when you also see him in 'tec. jason and bruce tangle with the joker, scarecrow, + mad hatter, and all of those adventures are...idk if they were intentional foreshadowing okay, but reading those and knowing where the story goes? oof. especialllllly #574. caveat: #572 is pretty light on jason, but he is great when he's on panel!

reboot:

probably a very basic answer but rhato rebirth (2016) #1-13, annual #1. i abhorred n52 rhato so i almost skipped rhato rebirth since it was still written by lobdell, but i'm really glad i didn't. i really enjoy jason's relationship with bizarro + artemis, but especially with bizarro because i think jason struggles a lot with feeling like a doomed creation, so yk, parallels. i want to say more but i know i'll get too wrapped up in discussing jason so i'm just going to stop myself.

i actually really enjoyed task force z, too. i think about tfz #8 so much, jason is such a manipulative little shit and i love it. he's so- i can't. i can't get into this rn, it deserves its own post(s).

overall for jay, i need people to read something other than utrh/lost days/b:ul 1-6. i love those, i do, but they aren't the only good pieces of jason content!!

TIM DRAKE

MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!! in my heart of hearts, i just want to rec his whole robin run lmao. dick was my intro, okay, he is why i decided to start reading comics, but tim, specifically his robin solo is why i'm still reading comics. hooked me fr. and young justice 1998, ugh love. but it has been a minute since i read these as well, so hmm. okay okay okay

pre-boot:

batman: prodigal. short version, tim is robin to dick's batman. super fun. there's a solid amount of dick and bruce angsting too, which, love. tim is honestly just thrilled that jpv is out of the batsuit and even happier to working with dick. very cute.

robin #46. listen. they're all superheroes okay, they all feel pressure to save people. but tim...losses get to him. the amount of times that he gets shoved to a breaking point and then...gets back up. keeps going. *screams*. anyways!! this is not tim getting back up, okay? this is him being shoved way, way down. it's so good.

teen titans 2003 #20. tim's dad has died. he shows up for his weekend at the tower anyways. he is not okay. that's it, that's the pitch. i did not like...mmm at least 80% of this run okay, but a few of the issues HIT and this was one imo.

reboot:

*deep sigh*. look. tim is not tim for like basically all of n52, although there are moments here and there were he feels like himself. i did not like his 2023 solo, the best parts of young justice 2019 imo are the character designs, (except for his drake costume, what was that omg), and i haven't read any rebirth batman/'tec yet. except for zdarsky's run. which. tim is good there! but yeah, not really a whole lot of material to work with + very limited reading experience atm.

DAMIAN WAYNE

god, i love this kid. nature vs. nurture fascinates me, and so much of his story digs into that on top of trying to figure out who he is apart from all of that. i will say, i'm not a huge talia fan and by that i mean, i have no idea who she is "supposed" to be, like i have no frame of reference for that atm, so if you are a huge talia fan these recs might not hit for you because from what i've observed from her fans she is not well portrayed a whole lot since becoming his mother? i think one of the things that is normal is dick absolutely disliking her though, which cracks me up. there's this older batman story (batman #322-335) where bruce works with talia and dick goes running to selina and i was so entertained. what were we talking about? oh! damian!

preboot:

batman and robin 2009 #10-12. damian is struggling, with a lot of things. the fact that bruce might be alive, what that means for him and dick, and his mother's puppeteering. there's this line that kills me: "can't you just love me for who i am? not what you want me to be?" and the thing that gets me, is the use of who vs. what. because he could have said, "not who you want me to be", but he doesn't

reboot:

batman: shadow war. this is post-alfred's death, and honestly, most damian stuff post city of bane is pretty juicy, but there's this specific moment in shadow war: alpha #1 that had me speechless. just like 😧 i love bruce, but that man has some of the most chronic foot-in-mouth disease. oh but fair warning, for whatever reason they don't draw dami's mask connecting?? it's so- it drives me nuts.

JUST FOR FUN

these are just two issues that i enjoy for the brother content!

nightwing 1996 #25. dick and tim's relationship makes me ILL. *ahem*. this issue is mostly just super cute and fun, (there's like 0.2 seconds of angst when tim asks dick if he ever thinks about jason 😭) and i adore it sm. fun fact, it's actually one of the first comics i ever bought!

batman 2016 #16. unfortunately, tim is not here for this, but duke is! jason and damian's interactions in the background of bruce's Very Serious Speech are excellent. bruce is so dramatic and his kids are so unserious.

what i've most enjoyed

i've enjoyed the majority of what i've read, even titles/events i wasn't particularly looking forward to but had on my tbr for whichever character. i'm going to break down most enjoyed into two catergories, arcs that i loved top to bottom and then the guilty pleasures. this is not an exhaustive list, just what immediately came to mind.

top to bottom

bruce wayne: murderer?/fugitive. shocker, ik. but it's just, it's just so frickin good. i've said before, and i'll say it again, gotham war could NEVER. this right here is peak batfamily drama. the tension? the mystery? the angst? i knew nothing going into this okay, and truth be told, when i started it i was like "oh joy. another event." because i was just trying to read the 1996 nightwing run, but i'd committed to reading in full all the events it crossed over with. but i was invested so quickly. and like, i loved how the narrative supported the possibility that bruce was the murderer, because like, you know there's no way, but the more that comes out the more damning it is, and so you're like really dying to know what actually happened and i feel like the reveal was satisfying.

batman: city of bane. i'm going to cautiously put this here, because there might have been something i didn't like but i cannot recall it for the life of me right now. something about me is i love when the heroes lose. infinity war, empire strikes back? love. and ik bruce takes back gotham, but they lose alfred, okay, they lost. i also didn't expect to like this arc, i decided to read it because i wanted to know how alfred died. and first of all, i was shocked, even though i knew it was coming because i expected it to like happen towards the end. but nope. just *snap*. and then later when bruce is back in the manor and is confronted with alfred's body and his good-bye message? oh. my. god. i was bawling. despite my penchant for sad narratives, i don't tend to cry that much, but this got to me so bad. like i had to pause because i couldn't see. amazing.

red robin. his cowl is so ugly, but i really do love the run. i see a lot of discourse about it and also a lot of...interesting fanfic takes, so i don't really talk about it a lot here because it feels like most people are kind of tired of hearing about this run, which fair. i really enjoyed it as a sequel to his solo robin run. tbh, i almost put this in the guilty pleasure catergory, because there are a couple things i don't totally love, but like if the others are 10/10, this is 9/10.

young justice 1998. i love this comic so, so much. i don't even know what to say, i get so overwhelmed with joy when i think about this comic. nothing has hit the same way with this group since either, which is a crime. i need a title with this team so badly.

guilty pleasures

these are all runs/events i know some/most? people cannot stand and i totally get why, and i have problems with them, so i'm probably never going to rec them in good conscience but also like i can't lie and say i don't like them. these are not recs, okay? okay.

robin war. is it a hot mess? yes. but there is not a whole lot of canon content out there with all the boys working together, okay? so much of that event had me banging my head into a wall, but for me, there were a handful of pearls in there. i mean honestly, if i listed out pros and cons the cons list would be way longer but those pros are very precious to me.

batman and robin: eternal. very similar reasoning overall to robin war. plus cass finally came back!! i missed her. i love robin!dick and batman content, and the kids working together. this is probably my least favorite guilty pleasure though, okay, it's on thin ice.

grayson. listen, i love janin's art sm. i'm pretty neutral about spy stuff, so like i don't engage with it a whole lot. meaning, although i've heard it's tropey af in regards to the genre, i'm not familiar enough with the genre to be like trying to dig my eyeballs out with blunt spoons at the cliche of it all. the constant sexualization of dick got old super fast, and her name may have been helena but she wasn't- my list of dislikes is lengthy. but idk, i had fun with it. and imo it does have some genuinely great moments, i love dick in the desert with the baby, the ache i felt when dick wanted to come home and couldn't get ahold of bruce, issue #12 stabs me in the heart- the dick and dami reunion? stoppppp. i feel like this run and the ric grayson era are dick's most out there lmao

so yeah!! thank you so much for this ask, i had sm fun answering it. if you have any recs for me, feel free to drop them :)

[seeker-ophelia]

Hallelujah

(There are no Veilguard spoilers in this content, it was all created in early September, I’m only posting it now).

So I found this old Bioware article from 2014…

Its about what the writers listened to when they wrote their characters.

I was immediately struck by Weekes’ (writer of Bull, Cole, & Solas) comment that he wrote whole swaths of Solas dialogue listening to K.D. Langs cover of Hallelujah.

Because when I was playing Origins, way back in 2009, as soon as I heard the words “The Chant of Andraste” I thought of Hallelujah.

No better parallel could exist for me. Hallelujah, if you listen to the lyrics, is not really church related, yet it got absorbed into the church as a hymn. Its fucking sad, and yet we’re praising god or some shit?

Kinda like how I feel The Chantry has changed their religion, their original purpose, Andraste and the Maker and all that, into something horrible (subjugation/lobotomization of mages, feeding templars crack, you know, nOrMal StUfF).

I love the parallels there. And I love that Weekes used this sad-ass fucking dirge for our sad-ass fucking egg, especially considering what KD Lang said about it:

Canadian singer k.d. lang said in an interview shortly after Cohen's death that she considered the song to be about "the struggle between having human desire and searching for spiritual wisdom. It's being caught between those two places."       (Be still, my heart.)

And I thought about how Legends Shouldn’t Be Given The Weight of History, and how The Chantry’s purpose has been twisted, and how Hallelujah’s purpose has been twisted, and at the time, I was completing The Temple of the Emerald Knights in DA:I. I was thinking about how the Elvhen temple is littered with statues of Andraste and Mythal (dragon), how there’s a Knight, Andale (which is so obviously Andraste, prob Flemythal reincarnate of some sort).

The blending and melding and mushing of cultures and religions as time drags on, how originally good or pure purposes are changed or shifted, or corrupted.

And I thought of Andraste again.

I have been unhealthily obsessed with this artist named Aly, who is a Bard in Thedas and sings at The Dread Halla Tavern (you can find them on spotify here);  

(for clarification, this human is not me, I am not a singer, she is very good, you should go listen to all her songs-after you read this).

Anyways, I got to thinking…

What would Andraste’s Hallelujah sound like?

I had to write it.

Its sad and beautiful and tells the story of a woman flighting against forces she has no hope of defeating (But we still have to try).

[Andraste’s Lament]

And I got immediately transported to a smoky, dimly lit tavern in Southern Thedas. Aly has just sung Andraste’s Lament, and is approached by Neria, a lone Dalish Elf who clutches a scrap of paper tightly in her hand.

Aly listens to this elf tell her a story of a sad song her mother used to sing her when she was young, before she got killed by bandits. And could she sing this song for her, please, she even has a few coppers.

And Aly sits down, scans the paper, and realizes it’s a different version of Andraste’s Hallelujah.

Written in small looping script at the top, in Common, is Dirge of the Dread Wolf.

And she sings it softly to Neria, a strange story of mothers and gods and tricksters and wolves, and Neria’s eyes well.

[Dirge of the Dread Wolf]

She ends the song, the last beautiful Hallelujah trembling through the thickness of the tavern air.

Neria sniffs once, and then begins a new story. Aly listens to this Elf speak of a crumbling Dalish temple deep in the middle of nowhere, where she found a piece of paper beside a four legged statue that has since eroded to expressionless guardianship, of words crossed out and changed and smudged.

Then she shakily hands Aly a different piece of paper.

This velumm is significantly older than the first, thicker, almost crumbling around the edges.

And its Hallelujah again, but its spelled wrong, and some strange name with too many n’s in it is written at the top.

And Neria asks Aly if she can sing this.

But it’s written in Elvhen, and Aly shakes her head, she doesn’t think she can stumble through all the strange Dalish a’s and ash’s and am’s (there's so many damn vowels in Dalish…).

But, Aly halts the elfs falling face, she is more than willing to sing this in Common, if Neria will stay to act as translator.

So the two bend their heads close over the bar, and Aly pulls out her small precious notebook where she writes down the lyrics to her own tunes, and they quickly make work of the Elvhen words, Aly humming and hawing as she changes some words to better match the pattern of the song.

And soon they have a brand-new Hallelujah, and Aly asks Neria to pronounce the name at the top.

Ghil-an’nain, Neria says, and make sure you spell the hallelujah right.

H, a, l, l, a, l, i, e, u, y, a.

What does that mean in Dalish? Aly asks the elf.

And Neria shrugs. Halla is like a halla, she assumes. But this word lieu, she doesn’t know.

Aly assumes in the context of this song it must mean birth, but Neria shakes her head. Shena is the verb for born.

Well, what about victory? But Neria shakes her head again. Ena’sal’in is the word for victory, or triumph.

Aly blows out a breath. She’s a lyricist. What would make this poetic.

What about truth?

The elf thinks, and a small smile grows on her lips.

She can’t think of a Dalish word for truth.

Ghilan’nain’s Truth of the Halla?

Aly’s beautiful soprano soon fills the room, and her eyes widen when a soft Alto joins her, singing along in the original Elvhen.

[Ghilan’nain’s Truth of the Halla]   

A haunting melody, completely changed by the understanding of the root of halla lieu’ya, not a praise to The Maker, or the curse of a trickster, but the story of a young god, beaten and battered and blinded, and her creations, and her destruction of them.

[Ghilan’nan’es Halla’lieu’ya]

The tavern erupts when they finish, and poor Neria blushes furiously as her back is slapped, and her hair is tousled, by the patrons of the establishment.

Aly and her new friend make their way to the bar, where foaming tankards await them.

They cheers, and as they tip the beer back, a city elf approaches them, dressed like a Dalish, but he has no vallaslin. He pushes his cowl down to reveal a bald head and shocking purple eyes. His voice is quiet, with a deep, romantic lilt.

“Where did you find that song?”

…

Please be gentle with any constructive criticism on my voice, I am absolutely NOT a singer, I know I don’t have a superstar voice but I’m also not tone deaf, so just… don’t be shitty to me, internet. Listen to the lyrics, not the delivery.

If anyone’s actually interested, I'll message you the lyrics. I also did record all four songs (Andraste, Dread Wolf, Ghilly (English), and Ghilly (Elvhen),) but can only put one video per post. Maybe I'll link them later if people are interested.

*It did not even occur to me until after writing Andraste’s Hallalujah that someone might have had this idea already. I did a little googling afterwards, and someone has put solas’ dialogue to the tune of Hallalujah, but no ones “re-written” it yet in this context (that I could find). My query to you is, why would Solas speak in Leonard Cohen's hallelujah/iambic pentameter if he had never heard it before?

---

Obviously, this can never be turned into a real song, because Sony owns the rights to the OG Leonard Cohen’s Hallelujah. But the romanticism of this song, changing through the ages, was too good to pass up. I hope you enjoy it, sincerely, and if you are a better singer than I, by all means, use my lyrics and record it, and please send me the link so that I can listen to it!  

Thanks to Weekes, Leonard Cohen, & The Dread Halla Tavern for inspiring this.

Bare your blade, and raise it high.

[homestuckreplay]

get dave strider a home cooked meal 2k09

(page 587-606)

9/5/2009 Wheel Spin: Parent Bad :( Verdict: Brother Committing Puppet Crimes (And Real Crimes)

9/6/2009 Wheel Spin: being silly :3c Verdict: Silliness Gone Too Far

Homestuck loves to slowly dispense information about a character’s guardian and the relationship between the pair long before said guardian actually makes an appearance. I kind of love it. It’s like hearing stories about a friend’s parents for months at school before going to their house one day and actually meeting these long fabled adults. In Homestuck, it gives these characters a lot of power as they have so much influence over the characters without even being around, it makes them mysterious in the ways that the lives of adults often are to younger people, and it adds another thing to look forward to in the story, another reason to keep coming back and reading the new pages every day.

John’s dad’s car was seen on p.29 – presumably with Dad inside – and Dad was visually seen on p.79 via a portrait on the wall, before showing up for real on p.88. Rose’s mom was seen in silhouette on p.231, but it took until p.388 to actually meet her. Dave’s bro’s appearance was actually foreshadowed on p.456, as he uses his baseball cap and triangular glasses as a lock screen, and again on p.587 with the baseball cap collection, and we get his full silhouette on p.592 where he REALLY looks like a guy with a skateboard. It could be a long time before we see him in detail, but given that Dad and Mom were both revealed during a Strife sequence with their kids, I’d guess that the same will be true for Bro.

But honestly, Bro continues to get worse and more sinister. It’s explicitly confirmed on p.595 that Dave isn’t able to put food in the kitchen, which puts a whole new spin on how excited Dave got about finding the apple juice in his closet (p.320) – that could be the first thing he’s had to drink all day. And depending on how often he’s able to leave the house, he probably lives mostly on snacks, maybe takeout since I imagine that’s how Bro eats. It’s gotta be affecting Dave’s health. No wonder he’s such an asshole.

Dave slicing a puppet’s snout off with a sword and putting it down the garbage disposal hurt me too because I get that Dave is doing this out of anger and fear, but his bro is absolutely provoking him into it, he’s obviously got more cameras pointed at all these setups ready to make more content for PlushRump. The line ‘Besides, it's not like your BRO is around to see.’ on p.591 definitely feels like an omniscient narrator giving a nod to the reader while still accurately reflecting Dave’s thoughts.

There are things Dave still isn’t getting about his situation. He’s caught in this space where part of him realizes how fucked up his relationship with his bro is and he’s scared, another part of him is reacting by doubling down on how cool he thinks his bro is, and a third part of him is still just oblivious. The internal conflict and the moment to moment uncertainty are very real for an abusive power dynamic in general, and although in the abstract it’s funny to imagine a jumble of shitty swords stored in a fridge, I really can’t laugh at any of this.

Dave’s bro is the first character that I don’t enjoy thinking about, but all this stuff is really important to Dave’s character, so I will watch the first Saw movie and see if that sheds any new light.

On p.587, there’s the line ‘You think if you see one more soft, bulbous bottom being like / kind of jutting out and impudent or whatever / you're gonna fly off the handle.’ This is word for word a set of messages Dave sent Rose on p.522: ‘if i see one more soft bulbous bottom being like / kind of jutting out and impudent or whatever / im gonna fly off the handle’ and is the second time Dave’s narration and pesterlog have been identical, the first being ‘it is like fucking christmas up in here’ referring to an unopened container of apple juice on p.26 and p.320. I don’t recall seeing this for any other characters. It makes Dave feel very unfiltered, like the difference between his thoughts and words is less than for the other characters. But it also feels like the narrator likes him, and is entertained enough by his words to replicate them exactly, like he’s god’s favorite.

Finally, I had a revelation that Rose should be the one using hash map. It’s the perfect modus for someone who wants to expand their vocabulary and show off all the weird words they already know. I bet Rose could get so creative with item names. Instead of a PLUSH CUDDLE CTHULHU (1) she could knit a FLOCCULENT OTHERWORLDLY AMUSEMENT (also 1 but like, a fancier 1) and she could spend all her time trying to find words that even the sylladex doesn’t know.

[tianasficrecs168]

Random Naruto Fic recs

Most of these are going to be general fic recs, ones without a ship, just focused on family/friendship and whatnot.

Also I'm obsessed with time travel, so like. There's a lot of that here.

A whole bunch of abandoned works, as well, sadly. This doesn't mean they aren't worth reading just bc they're unfinished!!! Please give 'em a chance.

Edit: some fics from here have been moved to a different list (yes I figured out how to categorize stuff just now, shut up), you can find them on my Warring States Era Naruto Fics

Here's the sitch:

A black dot • means it’s a one-shot

Brackets (…) means it's still being updated/not done/WIP – and I'm paying close attention to it

(000) -> disappeared off the internet (don't worry I have a copy shh)

(general+) -> Time travel or dimension hopping – something along those lines

100demons: "Ten Years Gone" (general+) a series, one of three Thirty year old Kakashi was supposed to have been killed by Pein during the Invasion. Instead, he wakes up in the body of his twenty year old self. (It gets a lot more complicated.)

Chica Blanca: - "One Chance" (...) (general+) last update: 2020 Revenge never tasted so bitter. It never was supposed to be this useless waste of life. Now Sasuke has a chance to go back and change everything.

Frozen Shattered Roses: - “Loop” (...) (general+)                       last update: 2009 My name is Naruto and I'm cursed. I'm trapped in a loop of time, reliving the final fourteen years of my life for the third time. Only this time things will be different, because this time I have a plan to escape.

Phoenyxx: - ��Unofficial adoption” (general) • A bed-ridden, sickly Kakashi receives a tiny unexpected visitor late at night, which causes a few interesting discoveries. Another moment to add to an alternate universe.

Jedi Honor Bound Ninja: - “To Be Cared For” (general) • Naruto doesn't often get sick, but when he does he knows his routine: hunker down and be miserable. But this time around maybe he can finally have a taste of what others normally have.

Laurelsblue: - “Summer Grass” (general) • There are many misconceptions about her. 20 Truths about Fuu, the Nanabi Jinchuuriki.

Blackkat: “Sweet baby, I need fresh blood” (general+) • Shukaku fixes the timeline. Grumpily. And with a lot of bloodshed.

Blackkat: “With friends like these” (general) • If she isn’t utterly mistaken, there's a flush rising in Orochimaru’s pale cheeks, one she only ever used to see when Jiraiya was being especially handsy during their genin days. It’s been a long time since Orochimaru got over that particular crush, and Tsunade stares at him now, at the averted eyes and rising color and aggrieved slant to his mouth, and feels glee bubbling up inside of her. “Really?” she says, delighted. “Who?”

Blackkat: “This is the passing of all shining things” (general) • There's a monster whispering in Minato's head, curled around his soul. It’s vast and hungry and full of fury, radiates it and basks in it and lets it spill over through the bars that cage it. If Minato had one ounce more energy, he would rage too, but— Anger is a luxury right now, an indulgence. He can't afford it.

Blackkat: “Switch It Up” (general) • Yamato is assigned to Team 7 as their jounin sensei. He may or may not be an evil mastermind, but it all works out for the better.

QuoteMyFoot: - “In The Name Of” (general) • Slowly, Sasuke forgets what 'living' is. (Post-massacre)

Searching.For.Enadi: “If the shoe fits“ (...) (general+)                     last update: 2020 Time travel. Technically, she could consider this the greatest mission she has ever undertaken, or a brilliant opportunity to finally hit the hot springs. (Or, the one where Haruno Sakura really, really needs a vacation).

Whispering Darkness: - “The life and times of Hatake Kakashi: nukenin” (...) (general+) In the sealed scroll he finds a Bingo Book – his own page marking him as an S-class nukenin with flee-on-sight orders. “Ok. That is definitely different.” In his head he blames Naruto – even if his number one unpredictable student had been nowhere near him on this mission. When things go this stupidly impossibly wrong it must somehow be the future Hokage’s fault. *it's marked as completed but the story's not done in my heart. so i live in delusional hope that it'll be updated one day

Narf—for-the-Garthoc: “Beautiful Day” (general) • Naruto focuses on his last day as Hokage and the people who mean so much to him.

Agent Malkere: - „What You Knead“ (...) (general) last update: 2022 It started, as most things did in Kakashi's life, with a mission gone wrong. (In which Kakashi accidentally acquires an emotionally healthy coping technique.)

Katlou303: - „Time Flies Like An Arrow“ (...) (general+) last update: 2021 Sakura traveled back in time with the intent of changing everything, but something went wrong, and now she's a four-year-old civilian having nightmares about impossible monsters and losing friends she has yet to meet.

Deletrear: - „Kick The Habit“ (...) (general+)                              last update: 2020 Yes, Itachi's emotional and physical well-being is his first and only priority. No, Sasuke does not have anything remotely resembling a plan to ensure this. It's fine, honestly.

Wroth_and_ruin: - „About Face“ (...) (general)                                      last update: 2017 A little yellow-haired boy saves Sakura from the bullies. And everything changes.

Elumish: - „Adoption by Defenestration; or, A Family Can Be A Fox Demon, Its Jinchuriki, and Three Dozen Highly-Trained Assassins” (general) • He will not be the ANBU who let the jinchuuriki plummet to his death out a fourth story window. Let that be another ANBU’s legacy.

Elesrea: - “Anachronistic Drift” (...) (general+) last updated: 2021                                    Her plan was flawless. Save Shisui. Save the world.

Cyan96: - “Kurama” (...) (general)                                        last update: 2018 Namikaze Minato makes a mistake. Uzumaki Kushina makes a choice. Naruto ends up growing up with a red haired, foul tempered older brother who wants Konoha to be atomized, preferably yesterday.

Dragonpyre: - “Time Travel? What the Fuck?” (...) (general+)                                                       last update: 2020 Basically, Team 7 vs. Kaguya, final smack down. Then suddenly POOF they’re twelve again and waiting to meet their sensei on team assignment day. With no way to get back they decide to stop the war before it begins, and maybe save some people along the way. But they’re twelve, how are they supposed to do that? Starring: Naruto Everyone's-My-Friend Uzumaki, Sasuke Maybe-I-Won't-Destroy-Konoha Uchiha, and Sakura Better-Than-This Haruno; with a guest appearance from Kakashi's guilt complex. We'll be in for a ride folks.

Tozette: - “Strike A Match” (general+) • Sasuke could have reversed time to save the world. He could have done it for his mother and his father, he could have done it for his clan or his village. That's... Those are sweet ideas. They're sort of like what might happen if you let Naruto imagine a motive for Sasuke to return to his hellish childhood. Save the village. Save the world. Be a hero. Sasuke makes a terrible hero.

YumeMadarame: - “I’ll fix it for you” (general+) Kurama wakes up in the dark, trapped inside a human body. The memory loss doesn't help. The Uchiha body either. When he finally understands he’s been sent years in the past, – decades, even – before Kaguya’s revival, before the devastation that had come with it, and before Naruto’s birth… he realizes he’s been given a chance to start anew. An opportunity to make things right, this time around.

Microgeek: - “Fox and Son” (...) (general) last update: 2021 Kurama has little love for humans and even less for his jailors, those Uzumaki with wind and tide in their blood, audacious enough to trap a god beneath their skins. But there is enough love left in him for his newest host, who had as little say in this life as Kurama did, and asked Kurama for friendship anyway. (In which Kurama raises a child out of love, hope, and spite, Naruto grows up to be terrifying, and Konoha collectively regrets that an ancient chakra-beast is better at parenting than they are.)

AvocadoLove: “Teach Your Children Well” (...) (general+)                    last update: 2010 What difference can one man make? After Madara and Sasuke's final attack on the village, Rokudaime Kakashi finds a time-travel scroll. Now he's Team Seven's sensei again. And this time, he's going to do things differently. 

Lolistar92: “Kit and kin” (general+) a series, one of 8 (no this isn't a typo. 8) The Sandaime is resolute when he shakes his head. “No, Kakashi. Naruto is safe where he is. Return to your post, as ordered.” Kakashi doesn’t move. “I’ll give you time to reconsider,” he says, jovial tone chilling with how juxtaposed it is from his previous killing intent. ~~~~ Or, former Rokudaime Kakashi wakes up in the body of his 14 year old self, fresh from the Kyuubi attack. He may not have been allowed to save his first pack, but he sure as hell is going to save Naruto.

[pearwaldorf]

Have you heard about what's happening on dreamwidth/FFA and volunteers talking about the dysfunction happening in the OTW and the CSEM incident?

I have! It's real fucked up!

(Blanket warning for discussion of CSAM/CSEM, as well as exposure to such in a volunteer context, in text and links below.)

For those who are unaware, failfandomanon (FFA) is an anonymous meme community on Dreamwidth for people to discuss all things fandom, serious or not. I think it tends towards kneejerk anti-purity wank, but it is one of the few places where people can talk openly about fandom things without it being traced back to a publicly identifiable handle. This context will become important later on.

You may remember last year AO3 got hit with emails containing CSAM and they had to lock everything down while they dealt with it.

A few days ago somebody on FFA asked about what happened re: the AO3 volunteers working through that period. Here is the tweet chain where I found out about it, with screencaps from FFA. Basically, said volunteers got a list of links to mental health hotlines and the names of people who volunteered themselves as resources for dealing with this stuff. Yeah. (As a tangent, the OTW has an estimated ~$2mm cash reserve. At no point did they decide to hire a counselor or any other sort of professional help to assist their volunteers in dealing with this.)

Impertinence has a good rundown of the timeline of events.

azarias, the person who became the defacto CSAM resource person (a truly horrifying statement), was traumatized dealing with this. The OTW used this opportunity to force her out because people on the Board didn't like her, realized they wouldn't have a defacto CSAM person, and reinstated her, expecting that she would go back to doing what she did previously. This goes beyond benign neglect into real actual harm inflicted upon volunteers.

Then! Then! THEN!! This message (FFA original) was sent out to everybody in the OTW volunteer Slack. Which basically says to volunteers "If we don't like you we'll come down on you like a ton of bricks if you talk about how we abused you."

I don't know who's keeping up on this on Twitter, but somebody started a Dreamwidth aggregating most of what you see above.

I know this is a lot of information to throw at people. I encourage you to read it and process at your own pace because this is important to understand. And while I believe this is trustworthy information (as far as I can tell), I'm not a substitute for your own personal judgment and brain.

It is clear to me the Organization of Transformative Works has abrogated its responsibility to its volunteers as people and as laborers on behalf of the organization. There is no formal mechanism for us as AO3 users or as people the organization claims to represent (members of fandom) to demand remediation on behalf of azarias or other volunteers who have been traumatized by this.

I expect there will be a lot more people than usual at the next board meeting (I do not see one scheduled currently), but they still don't really answer to us. If you donated at least $10 during the last pledge drive you're eligible to vote in the board elections, but that does not fix the current situation or the culture that lead to it.

As somebody who has been in fandom longer than some of you have been alive, and as somebody who's had an AO3 account since 2009, it grieves me to come to terms with the rot in the OTW culture, which is deeper than I could have imagined. It's one thing to see an organization drag its feet on things it promised to do years ago or misread the room regarding new technology. It is a whole other thing to have evidence it harmed people through active malice because they didn't like them and refused to make amends when confronted. That is not something I can support, regardless of what it may have done for fandom in the past.

[atla-confessions]

ambassador katara became a famous trope in early 2014, with "Once Around The Sun" on Ao3. that fic also set the tone for zutara fics that came after it, the anti aang and ant mai sentiment, assassination attempts (on katara's life, for the most part) and zuko's council refusing to accept katara as zuko's lover. i've been in the fandom since 2010, not in the last four years, I worded my rant not in the best way, sorry for that. the four years I talked about are referring to zukka's rise in popularity. If you check Ao3, the first zukka fic there is from 2008. lt's a ship that did exist but not since the beginning and not with the popularity of nowadays. After that 2008 fic, the next one is from the same year and then another one is published in 2009. And then other three during 2010. And then nine during 2011. And the number goes up in next years but really rises in 2020 (atla was added on netflix that year and we were in quarantine, that gave people a lot of time to watch and create content). Also, the majority of the 2008-2013 are accessible only to registered users, probably in light to the fact the homophobia in the fandom was ery strong. fire lady katara was more prevalent, yes, but any fic (and fanart) you check from 2014 and foward will be more kely to have ambassador katara rather than ire lady katara and when they do have her as fire lady, is really towards the end of the fic or in sequences of ambassador katara. i honestly think the first ambassador fanfic was a zutara fanfic, before OATS, on fanfiction.net on 2007. the earliest ambassador sokka fic as you stated is from 2008, but I don't know which site you're using as a metric poor little zuko is a common trope in non-zukka fics (since the majority of atla fics are zuko-centric), even zutara ones, but the majority of the ones i see with katara being "meaner" than she was in the series and sokka "needing to intervene, are zukka. a good portion of "the gaang learns how zuko got his scar" also fall under that label i don't care how "homophobic katara" got started and this isn't me being rude, just honest. It's out of hand and it's an annoying fucking trope (don't now if I can even call it that) and while it isn't common as "mean katara and savior sokka'" it's just as misogynist. Some authors really tried to keep as a little saint and then dunk prejudice on katara I recognize there are zutara shippers who are misogynist to mai but I never denied that. I was talking about zukka and their treatment of katara, I don't see why I would mention mai when she isn't even included in most of zukka fics. If you want to talk about mai hate, be my guest, you're probably more well versed than me since I don't engage with mai related content, being it anti or pro someone before you mentioned suki tho and that's something i wish i had included in my original ask. the show really disregards suki as does the fandom, it's annoying as hell to read a fic and they diminish sokka's feelings or her or make her jealous bc he's dating zuko

Okay, so I did further research into this. And I was right in the sense that Ambassador Sokka was not just a Zukka thing. The earliest Ambassador Sokka fic I have found is a 2006 fic on fanfiction.net. It is a Sokkla fic. There seem to be a few of them, it might actually be originally a Sokkla trope. I also found an Ambassador Toph/Zuko also from 2008. I think it might have just been popular across most ships at the time. A popular trope in general as opposed to one assigned to a specific ship, however it seems to have started with Sokkla unless you can find an earlier one. (The fic is on fanfiction.net).

I was in the fandom in 2014 but I still don't recall a lot of Ambassador Katara fics. Maybe this is because I was not a hardcore Zutara shipper. I remember I saw a lot of Fire Lady Katara stuff but maybe that was mostly from before. I genuinely saw the ambassador trope with Zukka first. Also, the first 'Zukka' fic I found was from 2005 on fanfiction.net but it also used to be referred to as SoZu at one point by some people. (Ao3 was created in 2008 btw, you can just backdate fics to when they were originally created/posted since it is an archive)

Honestly, I do not know how you are encountering so much homophobic Katara, I have not seen it that much and I like Zukka a lot. I have definitely seen these 'mean Katara' whump fics a lot with various characters needing to intervene. Even Hakoda in some. But most I have encountered have been gen fics.

I just brought up the general misogyny in the fandom because I believe it is a huge problem that goes largely unaddressed (or at least not properly addressed). People just seem to like to point the finger at various parts of the fandom but it's everywhere and it's very upsetting. You pointed out the Homophobia in the Zutara fandom, so I brought up that they also have a misogyny problem as well. Because the whole fandom has one. (Also, I love Mai.)

I have never encountered a Zukka fic villainizing Suki but maybe I just got better at identifying when a fic is going to be like that after my experiences with the Zutara fandom in the earlier days when there was a lot of bitterness over the ship not being made canon. (Fanfiction to vent is valid, I just wish it was easier to filter out. No hate to Zutara shippers, being upset about your ship and making content to vent is completely normal)

It's normal to diminish the feelings of the canon ship when doing your own ship. They usually do that, otherwise the characters would be with their canon love interest. I can't think of a non-canon ship where at least one of the people in the ship has a canon relationship where they haven't done that. Zutara does that. Zukka does that. Azutara does that. Ect. It's kinda par for the course

X

[dolliedyhard]

🩷JOIN MY SHORT STORY COMPETITION NOW! [Ends January 1st 2025]🩷

Hello and Welcome! I’m Lucy, better known as the creator of DollieDyhard ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶ I’m a MEGA creepypasta fan like… SUPER-ULTRA-MEGA. As you can guess my blog will be all about Creepypasta! Hooray🎉☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆ From fanart to OC’s to creepy stories to comics, I’ll make it ALL! In fact I have my own creepypasta oc! Her name is Dollie Winehouse, nickname DollieDyhard (hence my username) she’s the blonde girlie in the pic above and my pfp :3 This blog will be centered around her! Learn more about her here!

Stuff about meh!

♥︎15 - black girl🇺🇸🇿🇦 - bday is June 5th♥︎

I’ve been in the creepypasta fandom since 2017! >_<

I used 2 b scared of Slenderman and Jeff the killer when I was a little gal, like DEATHLY AFRAID. I thought they were real ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡

Now Jeff is my favorite pasta, he’s delicious🍝!

Nina, Jane and Slenderman are also my favorite pastas too♡

I’m a songwriter & I want 2 sing as beautifully as Amy Lee one day!

I have a humongous stamp & blinkie collection…ITS NOT AN ADDICTION.

”All can do!” List

this is a list of things I’m good with u doing!

Making fanart for me (OF COURSE DUHHH PLZZZZZZZZ)

Shipping ur OC’s with mine

Writing fanfic about my OC’s

Including my OC’s in ur OC lore (but u BUTTER give meh credit for mah oc >:c)

Sending me dm’s to be friends

“DONT YOU DARE” List

This is a list of things ILL KILL U FOR IF U DO IT.

Making “your own version” of any of my OC’s

Stealing my art

Tracing my art

Taking too much inspiration from me

Copying me

And buggin me for free shit (That’s a friends & moots only privilege HAHAHA.)

My Tags!

#DollieDyhard — All my posts about Dollie are in here.

#Fun Dollie Facts! — The mini series I made about Dollie to share fun facts about her.

#Dollie Dyhard Gallery — A display of all my art!

Socials!

Do not interact list

Alt account: @xlucythekillerx

♥︎Instagram♥︎

♥︎DeviantArt♥︎

♥︎YouTube♥︎

♬♩♪♩ MY ♩♪♩♬

MUSIC TASTE

Every creepypasta fan comes with an obsession with punk-rock and alternative music, it’s a fact! Aaaaand that fact applies to me too _(┐「ε:)_

Favorite bands? Here’s a list! (In no particular order :v)

Pierce the Veil

Panic! At the Disco

My Chemical Romance

Get Scared

Set it Off

Ghost Town

Flyleaf

Three Days Grace

Avril Lavigne

Evanescence

Black Veil Brides

More about the music I like here!

OTHER FANDOMS🦄🪽

｡･:*:･ﾟ★ ,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

A list of my other interests! Including anime, tv shows, and much more! If they are numbered it means they’re my top picks!

You might see me make fanart or mention from these fandoms! So that’s why I listed them.

ANIME

1. Ouran High school Host Club, 2. Black Butler, 3. Death Note, 4. Sailor Moon, Chibi Vampire, Vampire Knight, Inu Yasha, Jujutsu Kaisen, Diabolic Lovers, Tokyo Mew Mew, That time I got reincarnated as a slime, Cardcaptor Sakura, Loveless, Naruto, Hellsing Ultimate and Elfen Lied.

TV SHOWS & MOVIES

1. The Boondocks, 2. Breaking Bad, South Park, My Little Pony, Inside Job, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Ninjago, Hannibal, Camp Camp, Deadpool, Deadpool 2, Deadpool And Wolverine, Interview With The Vampire (1998), Sonic X and Coraline.

VIDEO GAMES

1. Animal Crossing: New Horizons, 2. Miitopia, 3. Fran Bow, Style Savy: Trendsetters, Undertale, Minecraft, Old Roblox (2009-2018), Hatsune Miku Project Diva, Detroit Become: Human, Sonic and Kirby.

Thank you SOO MUCH for reading! ((o(^∇^)o)) a lot of people don’t read intros >_> so I’m glad you did :) (Comment with a 💖 emoji if u made it dis far ^_^) I hope you stick along for the ride because it’ll definitely get wild! XD

If you want to see more art from me check out my gallery on DeviantArt!

Anyways, that’s pretty much everything I got 2 say :D Stay Frosty❄️ BAIIIIIIIIII

[fryday]

favourite taylor swift phancoded songs? I genuinely think her whole discography tbh

oooooohh anon, you're so right there are so many fitting songs. this is gonna be a long response.

daylight (one of my favourite TS songs)

"i've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night / and now i see daylight, i only see daylight" -> dan meeting phil at 18, "and for the first time since i was a tiny child, i actually felt safe."

"and i can still see it all (in my head) / back and forth from new york (sneaking in your bed)" -> replace new york with rawtenstall :')

and just some lines that kill me when i think of it in the context of dnp -> "and i can still see it all (in my mind) / all of you, all of me (intertwined) / i once believed love would be (black and white) / but it's golden"

paper rings

"went home and tried to stalk you on the internet / now i've read all of the books beside your bed" like HELLO? self-explanatory

"i like shiny things but i'd marry you with paper rings" very dan-coded, i love my expensive shit but if it's you none of that even matters

"i'm with you, even if it makes me blue" and "honey, without all the exes, fights and flaws / we wouldn't be standing here so tall" are so 2012-coded. the exes being us, lol.

also "kiss you once 'cause i know you had a long night / kiss you twice 'cause it's gonna be alright / three times 'cause you waited your whole life" like..... dnp supporting each other through every difficulty + see above re: dan becoming an adult and gaining phil 😭

mastermind

dan in 2009 (except for the fact that it was plainly painfully obvious, it was completely intentional)

"and the touch of a hand lit the fuse / of a chain reaction of countermoves / to assess the equation of you / checkmate, i couldn't lose" -> phlirting online, dan knowing phil's interests from following and watching him, etc

"nothing was gonna stop me / i laid the groundwork and then just like clockwork / the dominoes cascaded in a line" -> more of the above

also this makes me kinda sad but uhm "no one wanted to play with me as a little kid / so i've been scheming like a criminal ever since / to make them love me and make it seem effortless" :((((( not that anything about dan's advances were fake or inauthentic, but like, with his childhood experiences and stuff, yeah. him finding someone so perfect for him surely made him put in 10x the effort he would have done with anyone else

sweet nothing (another of my faves)

"they say the end is coming / everyone's up to something / i find myself running home to your sweet nothings" tell me those are not the most dan- and phan-coded lines ever??? we're all doomed, but i have you!!!

[adissonsss]

writing+abt me!

rules abt writing;

please be specific about asking; (not in order) genre of post, what character(s) you want, pairing, and era/season/episode

i will do; smut, nsfw+sfw, all genres of ff, probably all but the things in my no section, just ask

i will not do; (not kink shaming) but super nasty kinks(pet, scat, that stuff), underage smut, no consent(ncc is ok)

taglist; ask or comment, i'll add you

masterlist;

pt1 of detsl hcs(sfw)

pt2 of detsl hcs(sfw)

pt 3 of detsl hcs(sfw, pt1 of halloween special)

pt 4 of detsl hcs(sfw, pt2 of halloween special)

pt1 of bill kaulitz hcs(sfw, 2009)

pt2 of bill kaulitz hcs(nsfw, any era)

pt1 of tokio hotel hcs(sfw, bits of nsfw, any era)

pt 2 of tokio hotel hcs(nsfw, any era)

pt 3 of tokio hotel hcs(sfw, smoking, any era, angst+mostly comfort, pt3 of halloween special)

pt 1 of tom kaulitz hcs(sfw, teen daughter!reader, 2000's era)

what/who i'll write for;

misc.

tokio hotel

flamingo(albert aretz) (NO SMUT)

sam & colby

detsl aka le truk (i don't write for him anymore)

manzini

school bus graveyard

anybody, just ask!!

tv shows/movies

shameless

prison break

criminal minds (since it's summer i'm rewatching from s12)

barbie movie

umbrella academy

squid game

pen15(still on beginning of s2) (NO SMUT)

ncis;la(still on the beginning of s14)

anime

demon slayer (kny)

hunter x hunter

attack on titan (snk)

angels of death

haikyuu

assassination classroom (i've rewatched like 6x times it's SO good)

gangsta. (PLEASE WATCH & REQUEST THIS.)

bungou stray dogs

any anime (i've watched tons but i might have to do research on some)

things abt me;

she/her/hers

purple, pink, and blue are my fav colors!!

infp + december sag

i'm currently learning spanish, yiddish, and hebrew! (haven't been on duolingo in 7 months)

i paint, read, eat, write, draw, make ocs, bite my nails, bake, and take good naps

[x-on-the-calendar-business]

ryan ross iceberg (tier 2)

tier 1, tier 3, tier 4, tier 5, tier 6, tier 7, tier 8

the tip of the iceberg:

the young veins:

this is the band that ryan and jon started after they split from panic! it included a few other members, and often times ryan’s good friends z berg and alex greenwald (of phantom planet), who will be mentioned more later on. they only released one album in 2010, called take a vacation! they played some live shows, but at the end of that same year, they went on an indefinite hiatus. HOWEVER, they made an official instagram account and have been active this year!! it’s likely that it's because there will be vinyl repress (further supported by a comment jon left on their only post) but it’s super cool nonetheless [i].

this is a personal aside, but i honestly like this band more than anything panic! released post split, with the exception of new perspective and the calendar. like god this was such a good fucking band.

dottie, elwood, and hobo:

these were all ryan’s dogs.

hobo was the dog he got in 2006. however, when he and keltie (we will discuss her soon) broke up, she took her with her [ii].

dottie was a dog he got circa 2015.

elwood is the dog he got in 2017.

i’m not sure if ryan still has dottie and elwood since he has pretty much disappeared from the internet.

eta: i misspelled elwood's name as elmwood in the iceberg image. sorry about that!

z berg:

this is one of ryan’s exes and his bestie. they dated around 2009/2010. they still hang out today and he’s made appearances at these events she does called proms. she gives us the majority of ryan content that we’ve gotten in the past few years.

he featured on one of her songs, “the bad list,” and she featured of the young veins cover of “nothing matters but you.” she will come up more in other entries as well, which is why i'm not going super in depth here.

throam:

whew.

this is a ryden fic – probably the most iconic after the milk fic – called the heart rate of a mouse, written by anna green. it was originally posted on livejournal, and it’s LONG, coming in at 3 volumes and over 500k words.

the plot summary is that in the 1970s, ryan is the lead singer/guitarist of a famous band called the followers, and brendon is a roadie on their tour. brendon is openly gay, and ryan and brendon start hooking up, even though ryan is “straight.” from there, the series becomes 3 volumes of angst and pining. of course, there’s so much more that happens, but i won’t say too much for the sake of spoilers.

despite it being a ryden fic, it’s incredibly well written (if you’re able to get past the explicit smut), so i do recommend reading it at least once in your life. i’m gonna keep it 100, i’ve read this series at least 10 times with a yearly reread and have physical copies of it.

anna also wrote some ficlets to go along with it, such as one from brendon’s pov and just some extra stuff that didn’t end up in the final cut. she also wrote a lot of other iconic fics (all of which i also recommend), like the black rose season, how a resurrection really feels, posing in a ballroom, miguel sanchez’s grand slam of love, amongst many, many others. sadly, she purged her entire livejournal account, so you would have to turn to internet archives to read anything other than throam [iii].

unfortunately, this fic also reached the icon status that the milk fic did so multiple people from the bandom sphere know about it and have acknowledged it. for example, keltie, ryan’s ex-girlfriend, has read it and mentioned it on twitter multiple times (embarrassing for her but whatever) [iv]. jon tweeted about it once [v]. also, i swear that vicky t from cobra starship mentioned it (i wanna say it was on instagram, but i could be wrong); however, i can’t find the comment she made anymore.

link to throam for those who are curious

jac and keltie:

these are two of ryan’s exes from the panic! days.

jac vanek was a scene queen in the early 2000s, and they dated from november 2005 until feburary 2006 [vi]. it was a pretty cringey teenage relationship that was overly (grossly) chronicled on livejournal, and if you’re interested to read more, there will be a link in a later tier.

an interesting tidbit is that while ryan was dating jac, brendon was dating another scene queen named audrey kitching, which will also come up later in this iceberg.

keltie knight (née colleen) and ryan started their relationship in august 2006 after meeting at the vmas, where panic! was performing and keltie was a backup dancer (she was a rockette). he was 19 and she was 24, which may not seem like a big deal, but it definitely played into some power dynamics in their relationship. for example, in keltie’s book, she says she often had pay ryan's bills for him. also in her book, she stated that he didn't take their relationship seriously, leading him to propose to her and asking her to move in (maybe he wasn't taking it as seriously as you because he was barely in his 20s keltie just a thought). they broke up in 2009 right before the split. we’ll touch on that again later. there is honestly so much more that i could say about this relationship/keltie, but some of it will be covered in this iceberg and the rest will be linked along with the jac info.

sun and moon:

another ryden entry. this refers to a theory about ryan and brendon about which one is considered the moon, and the other is the sun; it’s based on their personalities, like who embodies which more. polar opposites and all that. when ryden was still relevant, who is the moon vs who is the sun was a hotly debated topic (ryan is the moon, while brendon is the sun is the only correct answer).

this also loosely tied into some lyrics from panic and their solo music. for example, when the day met the night is often referenced in relation to this theory, although this song is definitely about keltie [vii]. also, in 2014 ryan wrote lonely moonlight, which also could refer back to this theory and kind of calls back to the lyrics in when the day met the night [viii]. however, this song is most likely about keltie too, if not another past relationship (not brendon).

dead end kids club:

this is a band/touring project that ryan was part of, including z berg, dan keyes, and the band palm springsteen. it was first announced in july, 2019. later that same year, they went on tour, hitting 8 cities for fall balls. this was referred to as the “1st annual” but….[ix]

in 2020, they released a song called lonesome town that featured a lot of videos from fans [x]. also that year, palm springsteen was accused of assault, which dekc posted a couple of statements about on twitter, here and here, stating that they had been removed from the project “a long time ago” [xi]. they pretty much disbanded after that and haven’t been active since october 2020.

livejournal:

iconic. livejournal (aka lj) was basically tumblr before tumblr existed. similarly, it could be used as a personal blog, a place to post rpf fic, an emo poetry hub, a photo album, etc. it’s on this iceberg because ryan was very prolific on livejournal, under the username i_amclandestine, and it’s essentially where panic! got its start. ryan made contact with pete wentz through lj, sending him the early demos, which lead to pete signing them and then cue domino effect to a taylor swift song.

anyway, ryan made many iconic posts on there, some of which will be addressed directly in this iceberg, but i will leave a link to an archive of his lj account for further viewing. he made his last post in june of 2006, but he deleted the account in july of that year after receiving a spam of hate. at the same time, brendon changed his (part_time_lovah) to friends only [xii].

along with the links to ryan’s old lj, i’m also going to link a youtube video by one of my favorite channels, the cozy representative, in which julian goes through ryan’s posts.

this is the web archive for ryan’s lj (does not include his last post):

this is a tumblr masterpost of all of his entries, including the last one missing from the above link:

and finally, julian’s video:

ryan and spencer childhood besties:

ryan and spencer became friends when they were around 5 or so years old, which was always the saddest part of the 2009 split to me. ryan and spencer were in the og band before panic!, which will be discussed later.

in 2016, spencer’s wife tweeted that ryan and spencer were still friends. however, ryan did not attend spencer’s wedding, which could have been for a number of reasons, one of which we will also discuss more heavily later on [xiii]. of course, there is no way for us to know whether ryan wasn’t invited or if he just decided not to go.

mcr makes me dance:

in 2004, ryan went to the chemicalromance livejournal community and posted, “hey im ryan im new i live in las vegas my chemical romance makes me dance” and history was made [xiv]. this became a "meme" amongst panic! fans, and they started bringing signs with that phrase written on them for ryan told in pics. this has continued even in recent times.

newsboy cap:

this is another iconic piece of ryan ross fashion. he wore it a lot in 2004-2006 cause he’s a little fruity. like seriously, this hat had him in the biggest chokehold.

now, we move onto some of the deeper stuff and into the waters.

tier 3

references:

[i] https://www.instagram.com/theyoungveinsmusic/

[ii] https://pathetic-at-the-disco.tumblr.com/post/171475122211/did-keltie-knight-ever-steal-ryans-dog-or

[iii] https://web.archive.org/web/20170606154418/http:/beggarsnotes.livejournal.com/

[iv] https://youngveins.tumblr.com/post/141384273691/keltie-has-read-throam-this-is-not-the-twitter

[v] https://twitter.com/iamjonwalker/status/958805938227433472

[vi] https://pathetic-at-the-disco.tumblr.com/post/170958104996/the-tragic-love-life-of-ryan-ross-part-2

[vii] https://genius.com/Panic-at-the-disco-when-the-day-met-the-night-lyrics

[viii] https://genius.com/Ryan-ross-lonely-moonlight-lyrics

[ix]https://www.instagram.com/thedeadendkidsclub/?hl=en

[x] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzcWGQQiFDU

[xi] https://twitter.com/DeadEndKidsClub/status/1275849828459823105, https://twitter.com/DeadEndKidsClub/status/1283511345330049026

[xii] https://prettyoddfever.tumblr.com/post/629056560433446912/why-ryan-ross-deleted-his-livejournal-and-brendon

[xiii] https://pathetic-at-the-disco.tumblr.com/post/171901498176/so-i-saw-your-ryanspencer-post-and-i-was-just

[xiv] https://chemicalromance.livejournal.com/96360.html?page=1

[axl-ul]

Writeblr (Re)Introduction

Hello! After some time of being inactive, here's a small reintroduction from me:) And I also guess that this is the exact aesthetic I aimed for. Finally!

General info:

(Nick)Name: Axl-ul, but you can address me as Axl^^

Likes: Writing, reading, drawing, crochet, mythologies and folk stories, tea, doggos, cattos, battos (majority of animals that are fluffy)

Stuff I like to listen to: an ENORMOUS range that goes from og dubstep to chillstep to metal to edgy yeehaw dark country (among my fave artists are Bonobo, Nujabes, Burial, Hugo Kant, Sigmun)

Favourite movie: Noroi, The Vanished Empire

Favourite show: Mononoke (2009) it's actually an anime and yes I do consider it a show, Red Dwarf

Favourite book(s): The Witcher saga (Season of Storms was a little bit mid in comparison to the rest, still enjoyed it though), Solomon Kane, The Hobbit, Whiskey, Blood and Silver, The Warlock, Journey to the West (still reading it)

Favourite manga: anything by Junji Ito, Berserk

Favourite games: The Witcher trilogy, DreadOut, Condemned: Criminal Origin, TES V: Skyrim (also slowly getting into Oblivion), Sleeping Dogs, Darkwood, anything made by Fromsoftware (a fanboy)

Favourite genres: horror, mystery, (dark) fantasy, comedy

Favourite tropes: animal companion, found family, rivals to best friends

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Writer info:

Genres I write in: horror, mystery, dark fantasy inspired by world mythologies, dark comedy, my wips might have a touch of detective stories to them, too^^

Tropes I use(d): found family, animal companion, rivals to best friends, rivals to friends to lovers (used only once as I don't like romance that much, why it appears in my wips is a looong story), orphaned MC

POV: 3rd person, multiple POVs with main focus on 1 to 3 characters max

I tend to write in quite a flowery language and in poetic prose, but since English isn't my first language it can come across slightly awkward (TL; DR I do plenty of updates and edits to my posted stuff)

My wips are inspired and sometimes directly refer to a certain mythology, such as Slavic (this one is also most widely used as I like to read local legends of Serbia, Russia, the Czech and Slovak Republic, Ukraine, Poland and so on), Chinese, Nordic, Japanese and Indonesian. HOWEVER I love to create my own mythos and so the world is a blend of characters directly based of a mythological figure exploring environement both familiar and completely new to them. (I've always been intruiged by a question what would happen if world mythologies bumped into each other and what would be the consequences of it.)

My own mythos are pretty much eldritch-like oriented with a significant touch of folk horror. I'm not going to lie, I'm a FromSoftware fanboi, I see Bloodborn or Kuon, I'm going feral and so is my inspiration.

There are many occuring themes about substance abuse, addiction, health issues, gore, extreme violence, sexual assault/rape and other strongly 18+ stuff, so I'd appreciate if only 20+ y.o. people (or be at least 18, really) follow this account. In other words - PLENTY OF NSFW THAT'S NOT DIRECTED AND INTENDED FOR MINORS.

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WIPs

Not all from my wips have a proper introduction (a.k.a. there's no link for their Tumblr WIP intro). BUT I do plan on doing them, so expect the links to be updated. These are just quick summaries of them.

The Flight of the Western Crane - A dark retelling of Journey to the West where Sun Wukong tries to protect the young Buddhist monk Tang Sanzang while meeting a duo of a stranded Princess of the Great Tiger Kingdom and her foreign advisor Lady Wolf Witch. Their common journey starts out as an innocent one. However, it soon evolves into a dangerous chase where the Monkey King must face the worst of his opponents.

City of False Gods - Hybrid of wuxia, mystery and film noir genres set on a fabricated island near Hong Kong. The fiction evolves around the Monkey King who's, after his yet another imprisonment, woken up to a strange world of 1920s where his powers are under a radar by the local supernatural cop unit and is forced to live among the poorest while trying to solve strange happenings in the city. City of False Gods also serves as a sequel to The Flight of the Western Crane.

Empire of Dust - Historical dark fantasy with horror elements set in 330 Constantinople. The story follows two little sisters one of whom is considered neither dead nor alive. One day, Ulfrika sets out for a strange task in order to provide for her dear little sister. Her pure-hearted intention, though, may lead her down the rabbit hole which may devour her sanity.

Ratpeople - An outline idea for a standalone story involving Ulfrika and her time in the Wild West, where the soulless hybrid discovers an eerie town in the desert while chasing after a man who stole one of her horses. The story is related to weird western (mostly its horror and fantasy elements and no sci-fi stuff) and mystery genres and also mythology related things.

Boy Who Chased a Dragon - Another outline story outside the universe of The Legends of No-man's Land. The story takes place on an island of eternal summer and flower bloom, where mythical creatures live peacefully. One day, Dado* loses his pet dragon, a creature his sister gave him for his 8th birthday, in a harsh storm. Now, he sets out for a long journey to retrieve his best friend from the claws of the cruel Ember King.

*because this is still in a process of an outline/1st draft, I'm still not sure about the name, it's only a working name for the protagonist

[dj-of-the-coven]

Hit me with your favorite defunct website

You will regret this.

Have you ever felt isolated by the modern internet, or nostalgic for the way that you can vaguely--but not entirely--remember experiencing as a child? Well I can't speak for everyone, but the past few years certainly have left me feeling that way. Certain nostalgia posts made circa 2021 got my brain churning in that direction, dredging up ancient memories of reading personal blogs and spending hours on flash game websites that were more or less entirely nuked from the internet by my adulthood. The more I remembered, the more distressed I felt by their absence, even though it'd been years since I even remembered most of that stuff existed...

Aside from Animal Jam, I wasn't sure if anything I knew from my mid 2000s-early 2010s childhood experience was out there on the web somewhere--so, I did as any normal teenager would and I started doing copious amounts of research into a subject that basically didn't exist. I discovered the internet archive entirely on accident; spent days examining the layout of early youtube and any other sites I could remember, navigating by year and trying to figure out when everything took a turn for the worst. I started browsing through webcore tags on tumblr just to get close to what I wanted, because "old internet" yielded few results at the time, and google's input was less than useless. Only a few blogs on tumblr had the kind of content I was looking for, but eventually I struck gold when one of them pointed me in a brand new direction of hope.

This is when I discovered neocities.

Of course, I was already familiar with the webhosting platform of geocities from the old days. Geocities was one of the primary hosting platforms that I remembered without the help of research, but you may already have guessed by the lack of a link that it's dead--and you'd be right. It actually shut down back in 2009, which I learned through the same post that advertised its independent successor. For some reason, I'd always associated the memory with the time I was in kindergarten, but the date of shutdown actually confirmed that I must've known about it earlier, making the platform one of my first memories! It's been gone for a while, but not the impression of it that I had as a core pillar in my early web experience. And then there was neocities. What was that? I immediately went to investigate.

Of course, I was mostly doing this in between two late-night bussing jobs to afford my shitty apartment, aside from being in my final year of high school, so progress was slow. At the starbucks next to my school, I was always holed up in the corner during my short window of off-time with a coffee and my computer setup. It took some time, but I began browsing through the top pages one-by-one, following links and cataloguing where they led to. I took stock of which sites linked to one another. Eventually, I noticed a pattern: a lot of them linked back to a website called sadgrl.online, a purple and black neon haven of internet culture run by a webmaster known as Sadness. Everyone say hello to our defunct website of the hour!

At the time, the thing was absolutely bustling. Almost all of the most popular sites on neocities were linked to Sadness' site somehow, usually through her button collection. My own personal site, which I started building around that time, also contained one of her web buttons. She has several, but her most popular one looks like this. (I apologize if you're on mobile. It will NOT look good.)

I was intrigued! In a community so removed from the usual mainstays of the internet, there existed a blog that hundreds of neocities users were visiting every day, and I very quickly became one of them once I finished looking through her thought-provoking essays on programming and web culture. Her site went through a number of layout changes while I was a regular visitor--the vast majority of them are catalogued on the site itself if not also on the internet archive. It was a blog dedicated to the exact thing that I was interested in; what I had been searching for since the modern web started rubbing me the wrong way in my burgeoning adulthood. Her page prominently featured an essay on the faults of centralized internet and her journey to foster a space more accepting of individuality, information, and creativity without thought of profit. I was totally enamored, especially with the appealing gothic graphics that surrounded the lengthy text!

(here's a capture from August 2022)

Aside from Sadness, several other active community members had formed an alliance of websites dedicated to the preservation of old internet culture and the cultivation of unique online spaces. These people called themselves the Yesterweb. The yesterweb was run mainly by webmasters known as Auzzie Jay, Madness, Tsvety, Grafo, Cinni, Vincent, Iris, and Sadness herself, but webmaster Melon (of MelonLand fame) also ran a forum that was parallel to the movement. The yesterweb was a massive project that included an online newspaper, a web radio station, several introductory programming manuals, a forum, web-themed essays from neocities users, button makers, layout creators, and terms and definitions for people new to the decentralized experience. It was easy to get lost in it all... for a time, the rabbit hole felt endless and exciting.

Every day, I returned to check updates on Sadness' various projects while I began work on my own website. She had totally convinced me of my own convictions--I bought the dream hook, line, and sinker. My only goal for a while was for my site to eventually be included in the yesterweb webring alongside all these amazing programmers. I wanted to contribute to the world of creativity that I could only dream of when HTML was still just meaningless jargon to me! But I was too slow learning the languages necessary, and the yesterweb was just growing too fast to be contained. I dipped for a few months to focus on my move to a new city, and by the time I returned, the whole yesterweb had disappeared scorched-earth style.

Okay, so what the fuck happened?

Currently, on the front page of what used to be a hopeful and inspiring collection of internet resources, there's a long essay made by the webmasters who founded the project, detailing burnout and massive stress due to the community growing faster than they could moderate it. It is certainly not poorly-intentioned. However, the discovery was absolutely devastating to me. My dream had gone up in smoke before I could even try to reach it, and I was apparently a part of the problem by caring so much about it. The radio station is gone. The webring was deleted. The forums shut down. My favorite webmasters' sites were no longer being updated. I felt awful for the people who had been affected by all this stress and pressure, but after so long of working to join the movement, I felt betrayed by their abandonment. The yesterweb disappeared in almost exactly the same way the old web did the first time--ripped from my fingers before I was able and ready to participate. And I can only wonder... what happened to the goal of turning the internet back into a place for us? How did it get to the point of ruining these people's lives within the span of maybe two years? I'm really not sure. There's a lot about this story I still don't know, and there's not really a way to access the drama that happened in a discord server that I never joined. The information published on the yesterweb's page is the only reliable source I'm currently aware of.

Still, in spite of it all, Sadness' website has remained one of my major inspirations in programming and web philosophy. I may be in mourning about a dream that died before it could truly live, but whenever I think about the months that I spent eagerly browsing her site for updates, I remember that spark that initially inspired me to begin researching the net in the first place. She was a major player in the game--not the only one. The website that she created was my favorite while it was active, and now it is my favorite website that is currently defunct.

Thank you for coming to my tedtalk.