#because of crimes
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Batman gives each of his Robins a different code to use when they’re in trouble and need immediate extraction. He promises that when they call, he’ll drop everything just to get to them, come hell or high water.
Jason, during his time with the League, shares his code with Damian, to be used “only in the direst of circumstances, when you have exhausted all other options.” He doesn’t know if Bruce will answer, given how fractured their relationship was before he died, but it is better than nothing. Every tool counts when they live such dangerous lives.
Damian uses it exactly once, and Bruce, who still feels the loss of his son like a yawning chasm in his chest, responds to it even though he knows it can’t be Jason because Jason’s dead. What he finds, instead of Jason, is a boy in League garbs, drenched in blood from the tips of his midnight-black hair to his too-small feet, with a face that Bruce sees himself and Talia in, requesting asylum from a grandfather who wishes to possess his body. Bruce doesn’t question how this boy who is so clearly his son knew the code. Talia al Ghul is resourceful and places family above all; the code is not beyond her abilities to discover, and she is not above using Bruce’s desperate love for his dead son to ensure that hers does not meet the same fate.
Bruce takes Damian in, because of course he does, and since Jason is dead he allows Damian to keep using the code. After all, it’s not like Jason is alive to use it, right? If someone uses the code, there’s no one it could be but Damian, right?
The next time the code is used, Bruce traces the location to Gotham even though Damian was supposed to be in Bludhaven visiting Dick. But whatever happened that resulted in Damian being in Gotham can wait, because he has already failed one son and he will not fail another, his son is in trouble and he needs to get to him, he needs to—
What he finds, instead of Damian, is a boy (just eighteen, too young, but also too old, but also he will always be a boy to him) in League garbs, drenched in blood from the tips of his midnight-black hair to his too-large feet (when had he gotten so big), wearing the face of his dead son.
(Who, maybe, just maybe, may no longer be so dead.)
#Jason sees Bruce answer his code with such desperation and thinks that maybe Bruce still loves him just a little#maybe he doesn’t need revenge maybe he can just go home#maybe when HE calls it instead of Damian Bruce will come get him too#and because of that there’s no red hood in this au#even though I love crime Lord red hood Jason#maybe he can still be a crime lord idk just not one called red hood who baited Batman into choosing between him and joker#Bruce Wayne#Jason Todd#Damian Wayne#Batman#DC#DC comics#DCU#Batfam#Robin#DC Robin#notfic
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Annabeth: I, a child, had to earn Thalia’s love, that’s how the world works! I have to earn my moms love. Love is transactional, you gotta be worthy of it first silly :)
Percy, listening to this on the train
#STOP TRAUMATIZING THIS CHILD PLEASE#this is what it’s like when you were raised in a loving home and you find out your friend wasn’t#but they don’t know they weren’t#so you’re like um hey that’s fucked up and sometimes a crime?#you tell them parents are supposed to love you as is without earning it and they don’t believe you#you can hear the therapy bill racking up#annabeth chase#Percy jackson#percy jackson and the olympians#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo#pjo series#pjo tv show#mine#adding on to my tags because some people are debating if that’s how love works#love is meant to be a mutual exchange and something that grows over time between two people as their bond grows#whereas how Annabeth says it#in my opinion at least#she had to do XY and Z to be worthy of thalias love before receiving it#like with her mother#she has to be amazing before Athena is proud of her#vs Athena being proud of her just for being her daughter#that being said I’m not hating on a traumatized child having potentially negative and toxic patterns#more pointing out the comedy of the scene from Percy’s perspective who has a good grasp on healthy vs unhealthy relationships
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mouse bites™
#anybody do this yet?#house md#hate crimes md#house md game#mouse bites#gregory house#hilson#james wilson#lisa cuddy#robert chase#allison cameron#eric foreman#house md meme#he needs mouse bites to live#shoutout to whoever made the house game generator thing#this took me way too long#house#dr house#also if you notice house's clothes kinda changing colors when he holds the mouse bite serum#its because i had to recolor it myself#i couldn't get the shades of gray to be exact#oh well#i also drew the nosebleed lmao#every house episode ever#generic house episode#editing this to say#this is not an original meme at all#I just ds-ified it tbh#ive seen some people not know it but i recommend you look it up#or like iykyk i guess
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by far the harshest truth ive ever had to come to terms with is that many people genuinely have absolute dogshit taste and that is, technically, not a crime
#ITS NOT A CRIME ITS NOT A CRIIIIIIIME i scream to myself#before forcibly clicking away from a post that made me see red because someone said they liked a book i thought was an insult#to the concept of reading
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this specific expression Wilson makes whenever House is talking and accidentally admits to something deeply distressing is so funny. psychiatrist stare
#gregory house#house md#james wilson#hilson#hate crimes md#he really tries to pretend he doesnt gaf because house hates sentimentality#but whenever house is looking away from him. free game to stare with middle-aged concern
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important family group chat discussions
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#this is so dumb but i feel like the batkids would have really stupid discussions#jason: guys dw im not even that mean of a crime lord#tim with his decade worth of incriminating evidence plus the bloody dollar tree robin costume jason wore at titan tower: r u sure abt that#bruce the next day: WHY is there a paper headline about our family having mob ties with the red hood??#steph telling tim to tip off vicky vale as a joke because hey yk what would be SO funny guys?#dc comics#batfamily#batfam#batkids#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#stephanie brown#duke thomas#bruce wayne#batdad#incorrect quotes#texts#socmed au#social media au#crack#batman#fanatical posting
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It's always "Hades isn't bad or cruel, his deeds are just metaphors of the inevitable death" or "Hades kidnapping Persephone represent the premature death".
But when the argument "Zeus has numerous affairs and many children because he represent the fertile rain" is brought up, all nuance is suddenly out of the window and Zeus is just a womanizer who can't keep it in his pants.
#hades#zeus#greek mythology#greek gods#greek deities#cherry picking who should be condemned for their “crimes” and who can be excused because “their action is metaphorical”#just shows your ridiculous hypocrisy#if you're gonna judge the gods at least put all of them on the same standard#or maybe - i don't know - understand that you're not in the place to judge the deities from a different culture???#i admit i used to have a “Hades good/Zeus bad” phase too#but i'm growing out of it because in the end i'm only reading the stories from another country
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free dick grayson from the shackles of his 20's
#this 97 year old robin still fights crime the old fashioned way#he is the way he is because he'll never reach the legal age to rent a car#dick grayson#nightwing#robin#richard grayson#jason todd#red hood#dc#dcu#my art
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he quit the next day
#artwork#ace attorney#aa by me#apollo justice#aaaj#phoenix wright#beanix#miles edgeworth#narumitsu#wrightworth#aa4#apollo annexing this picture to his workplace harassment lawsuit#which is a waste of time because thats now a crime in AA
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i’m sick and tired of people calling jason a literature buff and then perceive him as only reading jane austen, because, yes he does canonically read austen avidly, but please let him read other books/authors that reflect him like; crime and punishment, metamorphosis, frankenstein, the art of war, the velveteen rabbit, the count of monte cristo, dante’s inferno, to kill a mockingbird etc— maybe i’m salty because i’m a book nerd and no one gets it right, but i want to see people take canon further and excel it rather than boiling down the one thing and beating it with a stick
#jason’s book choices also definitely subtly reflect himself#he’d also eat up hunger games and maze runner and pjo - he’s not strictly classics because even i can’t sustain myself on whatever the hell#dostoyevsky was yapping about in crime and punishment#this also goes for tim and coffee#let that boy get another drink#dc#jason todd#robin#red hood#classic literature#literature
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Danny goes to a new School
So! When Danny got expelled from his High School, it wasn't really a big Suprise. He had missed for too many days or just walked out in the middle of Class, and his grades were lower than anyone else in the school. It was just a matter of time really.
When confronted by his Parents, he had just claimed that it was the constant ghost attacks getting to him (not a total lie) and that he was sorry.
Well, his parents tried to help.
After hearing about his supposed Fear of Ghosts, they decided that it was a good idea for him to go to school somewhere outside of Amity Park, so he could focus on his Schoolwork and not be distracted by the constant Attacks.
Of course no School wanted to accept a problem student like Danny, so they were forced to look into alternative schools to find one that would accept him. And they did! So they had Danny pack his bags, promise to call regularly, and shipped him off to his new School.
HIVE Academy.
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#HIVE Academy#Danny goes to HIVE Academy#Suprisingly they have an actual School System at the Academy#The Headmistress would not have her students be undereducated#They were Villains not Savages#This takes place before Brother Blood ever takes over the School#Danny actually really loves his new School#He was accepted because he was seen as a troublemaker who could easily be converted into a Villain with Ghost Hunter training#I mean he was raised by Ghost Hunters so he must have been trained for it right?#So nobody knows about his Powers#They think he's just a really good Ghost Hunter#Danny mostly keeps his head down#He will occasionally commit a major crime or go on a mission for extra credit#But that's the extent of it#The Titans are extremely confused
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Hugh Laurie: Yeah, I would actually love to have House as my doctor. I actually love him as a character so much, and I think he's actually a very sweet, caring person under his rude exterior. I'd love to sit down and have a chat with him.
Robert Sean Leonard: Wilson's a fucking freak and he scares me
#I dont remember if ive made this post before#so sorry if i have but here it is again#because i think its hilarious#house md#house#greg house#james wilson#gregory house#wilson#hate crimes md#hatecrimes md#robert sean leonard#hugh laurie#rsl
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The real reason why FNAF movie Vanessa got her job,,
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#vanessa shelly#fnaf vanessa#william afton#steve raglan#abby schmidt#idk if this is talked about a lot#but like NO doubt Vanessa is only a cop#IS BECAUSE her father pressured her to be one right#like not to take anything away from her#but it’s obvious too she seems to enjoy child entertainment more#or even teaching people things#especially hanging around Abby makes her happy#Being a cop doesn’t seem to interest her outside of being her job#and she’s probably just a cop to cover up her fathers crimes#she watches the region where Freddy’s is#somehow William was able to change his name and get new work#the officers looked for the kids never found them#and she probably sweeped it under the rug etc#William gotta get jumped man BAHA
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Danny: Hey, I need you to be my boyfriend for a week.
Jason: What.
Danny: My parents are coming over and I've apparently accidentally talked about a partner more than once and only realized when they said they wanted to meet them.
Jason, currently still solidifying his power as a Crime Lord: Excuse me?
Danny: Let me get this out of the way, I do not consider you at all a person of romantical interest and a friend. But I need you to act as my partner for only a week until my parents go on their merry way over to my sister, okay?
Jason: Is there, quite literally, no one else to ask this?
Danny: You're my only friend who lives in Gotham, plus we share the same apartment.
Jason: That's almost sad.
Danny: You in?
Jason: Sure, why not.
===
Maddie: Danny, honey.
Danny: Yes mom?
Maddie: I don't mean to.... question, who you choose as your parent but. Well, me and your father was just wandering if he was a... [Maddie gestures with her hand] you know, one of those.
Danny, uncomprehendingly staring at his mother's hand: What.
Maddie: Oh dear, how do I bring this up. You know, one of those.
Danny: Mother I need more context.
Jack: If your boyfriend a crime lord!?
Maddie: Jack!
Jack: What? Beating around the bush wasn't helping!
Danny: Say WHAT?
===
Danny: Hey dude, thanks for helping with this even though you didn't need to!
Jason: No problem, I wasn't doing anything too [Crime Lord activities flash through his mind] important.
Danny: Can you believe my parents thought you were a crime lord though? Weird am I right?
Jason:
Danny: Jason. You are scaring me.
Jason: Haha, yea that's weird isn't it?
Danny: Jason.
Jason: Well, I have to leave now to attend to my totally real and totally not crime related job at the ice cream shop.
Danny: [Squints eyes]
Jason: [Internally sweating bullets]
Danny: Suuuuure, bring me back some ice cream though.
Jason: [Thumbs up and leaves]
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#dcxdp#dc x dp crossover#Danny isn't romantically interested in Jason in the least#Neither is Jason romantically interested in Danny#But he needed a partner and Jason was the only one available#Jason somehow managed to balance that and being a crime lord#Jack and Maddie instantly had the suspicion of him being Red Hood aka a crime lord aka a criminal aka a danger to their boy#Danny doesn't know at ALL though and so they hang that theory up because if Danny didn't know then he probably wasn't a crime lord#Jason's identity was almost blown because he pretended to be the boyfriend of his friend#Again Danny doesn't know shit about him being Red Hood he just thought dude was dedicated to his job plus its Gotham#Not that weird to come back with scraps and scratches
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Our new Necromancer just discovered that Glory is technically dead. She uhh, then proceeded to imply that she was going to "study" him later.
Evil scientist who does live vivisections + junk with death and the undead, just told the guy who's 1 (of 3) ghosts inhabiting this Changeling that she was going to figure out what made him tick, essentially. Horrifying.
#light's spot#Pierce is desperately trying not to get discovered#because of crimes#he didn't realize he'd have to deal with a crazy scientist trying to figure out wtf he's made of#and like#two of the four identities he takes on (Tamil and Kelsie) aren't even adults and he doubts that would stop the necromancer#this is a whole new threat#forget the party not caring#this new gal is gonna hunt him for sport#lmao
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Thank you for having bee obsessed with fellow and gidel at some point the art is wonderful the jokes are fun and it fuels my newfound love for the newly turned teacher wannabe and his brother
"at some point" heavens no, these idiots have been living rent-free (they would have it no other way) in my brain all year, and will continue at least until skeleton man shows up to steal christmas our hearts. and probably well past that. 👍 years from now I will continue to wake up to incredibly stupid doodles of them that I have no clear memory of drawing and have to debate whether or not they're fit for other people's consumption.
(also thank you! 🧡💜🧡)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#stage in playful land#stage in playfulland#sometimes the characters just hit you in juuuuuust the right way#sometimes those characters are anime versions of 1940s disney villains who go around kidnapping and maybe murdering people#but y'know. in a silly way.#look i wouldn't have expected it either and yet here we are#genuinely i was very excited for the playful land rerun just because it meant i could get back to them#fellow's card story only made things better#they are SO bad at doing crimes but you gotta respect the commitment
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