#because obviously Bruce is going to need an actual human child

[noxcheshire]

Taking it with Phantom now turned Robin, let’s assume he had been de-aged and was wandering different universes, cause I have a VISION. He’s around Tim’s age physically now, but mentally? He’s less human than he is ghost now a days.

So the questions is: just how long Danny stays.

Angsty route is that Danny never intended to stay longer than to just help Batman, and when he sees him healing — perhaps to a human it’s been so much longer, long enough for people to have become comfortable seeing this new Robin, long enough for years to pass, but so short for Danny because time is almost nothing even to a half ghost — and he vanished.

Just up and vanished, because he looked at Batman — he looked at Bruce Wayne — and saw a man who has healed since Jason’s passing. And if this is BEFORE Jason’s return, then I do believe even Red Hood would be confused as to how his replacement is just? Not? There? Not anywhere, what will he think?

Does he believe, in his own burdened mind that maybe Bruce had done it again, he caused another Robin to die because what else could have caused a prominent figure both in the vigilante night life and in the civilian one to suddenly disappear?

Jason’s no longer angry that he had been replaced, now he is angry that even that new Robin had died and Bruce is keeping it hidden.

And the rest of the Batfam?

Bruce who had become dependent on his third child, who could trust and rely on his capabilities and warmth, being the very glue that kept him together — and Dick, whose second brother is now missing, the one he would crack silly little jokes with, and who loved to bother him with that cocky smile and affectionate shove of his shoulder when he would visit — and Cass who felt seen because Danny just knew even when she didn’t speak, like he could hear the voice kept tightly in her chest, and had made her feel like she was just as normal as anyone else — and Damien, who had been righteously upset from the get go, who ran his sword straight through Danny who simply laughed, his blue eyes lighting up with expectation and joy, and who never scolded Damien for his differences and more violent tinged upbringing — all these soul touched people?

He was their brother/son/friend and they wanted him back.

On the other hand, the non angsty Danny side, this boy is just chilling with a smoothie and patting himself on the back for helping out a fellow hero(s).

As for Tim, I’m not sure.

If there is no reason to become Robin, then is there anything truly to integrate himself into the Wayne household?

But he is a kid, a tiny wisp of a child and maybe Danny saw him some nights when he would burst across rooftops and cock his ears to listen for crimes.

He would stop for a moment, and maybe he wanted to help the kid too. Because he was so tiny and pale, and there are bruises clinging to his eyes from lack of sleep.

He begins to act as Tim’s little shadow, a companion, and when finding out Tim is all on his own?

Well, Danny had never really thought too hard about his actions and simply dropped the child right in front of Alfred so that Tim could be feed.

Bruce doesn’t even notice the kid, at first. After all, Tim doesn’t need to be a Robin, Danny has this role filled, so what does Tim do? He stays away, hiding dem sight and trying not to bother because he has nothing to offer the Batman.

Bruce doesn’t notice until Dick visits and finds Danny with a kid not even younger than himself, obviously taking care of the kid and is demanding why Bruce hasn’t introduced them to Timothy Drake.

Tim in this way becomes Timothy Drake-Wayne, but he still isn’t a Robin. But what if he wants to be included? What if he wants to help? What if there’s a moment in all this where Danny get’s hurt, or Bruce, or maybe even both, and Tim decided that he would be the tech support. He would be the mini Oracle of that time, without ever taking the name.

In the future Bab’s and Tim are a fearsome duo.

And maybe that’s what causes them the most pain, because even together, they are not capable of finding Danny.

At least, not until John Constantine gives an unexpected clue: “You never even knew, did you?” Perhaps he’s sympathetic, or maybe he’s just curious because surely they must have noticed how very not human Danny is. “That kid was already dead.”

After Jason's death, Bruce spiraled hard. Tim decided something needed to be done and went to Dick for help. However when the man refused to go back to being Robin, Tim resolved to become Robin instead. It turns out he didn't need to though as by time he makes his way back to Gotham, there's already a new Robin swinging through the streets.

[thesummerstorms]

The other thing that I think I would want in an Annabeth Wayne AU that I don't think I've seen so far is Bruce being absolutely pissed at Athena.

It was bad enough with Talia and Damian, but Athena is a literal god of wisdom who should know better AND he doesn't even have the "culpability" of having slept with her.

She one hundred percent saw Batman, tactician of the Justice League, was drawn in by her aspect of the Goddess of Strategy, and proceeded to create a child without his consent, a daughter who she didn't even raise before the child became a weapon.

And like whatever else, however fucked up Damian was by his own training to become a child-weapon, at least Talia loved Damian.

Whereas Athena loves Annabeth in the way a Goddess loves, not the way a Person loves, and I don't think Bruce, whose entire identity is so fixated on his relationship with his own parents, would recognize that as love at all.

And, like, Talia put Damian through a lot of shit. I think Bruce would be angry there too. But when push came to shove, she at least at some point brought him to Bruce because she thought it was in her son's best interests.

Athena actively lead Annabeth away from Bruce and into the streets at the age of seven, which Bruce would never see as in her best interest, whatever Athena's godly perspective is, however badly he reacted after Jason's death, even though he couldn't see (and dismissed the idea of) the spiders and the monsters. She was seven. In the streets of Gotham.

Athena let Annabeth fight a major role in two wars back to back without being there to train her or protect her or love her or even advise her. Athena advocated for the cold blooded murder of the other children who had actually tried to keep his daughter safe. Athena sent Annabeth against Arachne when Athena's children have universally died on that quest for a thousand years.

Athena let Bruce think he had gotten Annabeth killed because of his own inability to handle his grief. Let him think his daughter was dead or worse for years. Would have let him keep thinking that if the Fates didn't have other plans.

And just, in true fashion for all of my ideas on a PJO x DC crossover, everyone really comes out more traumatized than before. This includes Bruce.

Because now he wasn't just used unknowingly for a child just once, but twice. And in both cases he's going to have to live forever with the guilt of not having been able to protect his kids from what their other parent wanted to make of them

(On top of all the ways he has directly failed them and made any complexes worse, of course )

[shit-talker]

The only way I can rationalise people accepting literal children going out and fighting crime as Robin is if they don't think Robin is a real child.

I think it would be fun to see how Bruce would use that to his advantage in protecting his kids. Like, if people think Robin isn't human, if they instead think he's a spirit or a ghost, they are less likely to shoot at him, less likely to try and physically attack Robin because they think it would be no use.

The fun part would be deciding HOW they would do this. I like to think that Robin's domino mask doesn't have a hole for his eyes but instead is glazed over so that he can see out of it, but you can't see in. Maybe they install small lights in it so it looks like his eyes glow in the dark, because can you image how fucking scary it would be to just see these two sentient light-like eyes and just know the Batman must be lurking somewhere close by?

Maybe Bruce installs super strong magnets in their gloves because on the chance that someone does pull a gun on his kid close range, it would be a lot easier for them to grab the gun away if they had the force of magnetism on their side. Also, grabbing onto poles and other metal materials would make all the scaling on tall buildings a little safer. Obviously, they'd need a way to turn it on and off, but still. Can you imagine, you're in a warehouse and there are steel frames fucking everywhere and you look up and suddenly there's a child gripping onto one effortlessly? Horrifying.

Maybe they have a voice box. Want to scare people? Play this really ominous recording of a child's laughter that echoes just a bit too loud to be normal. Play this ominous screaming that seems too silent to be real. Play this ticking that seems to never end that induces stress and increases the chance of them messing up.

What would be even funnier is keeping this act up with the Justice League and other teams.

Batman doesn't bring Robin to these meetings at the beginning because he sees no need to involve a preteen in such matters, but at some point the subject does come up and it's sort of like; So, Bats, what exactly is the kid? Like...is he yours?

And Bruce (paranoid as fuck) doesn't want to admit to these people that yes, Robin is my son because hello? That's gotta be his biggest weakness, he would do anything to keep that kid safe and fuck them if they ever tried to hurt him to get to Bruce.

So, he tells them that he's a spirit sent to haunt him and remind the city of it'd failures and the Justice League just... believe him?? Because this is Batman, and why would Batman ever lie about something so, frankly, strange? And it's not a huge deal, like they're a team comprised of metas and aliens and literal godesses, so what if the one normal human guy has a weird little ghost child? Who cares if he cares about it like it's a real boy? Maybe the baby spirit has rights, too!! They don't know!

So, when the JLA gets more popular and becomes an actual, legal part of the American government, they're required to list all of their members. And they class Batman as a human, because that's obvious but next to Robin, they don't really know what to say or how to ask Batman about it, ao they just put "Unknown Child Spirit - TBD"

And then just... never change it?

So, they don't question why a few years later Robin seems to look entirely different, or why after that he changes again, or why Robin is suddenly a girl for a while before going back to a little boy. That's obviously just some weird spirit thing they don't understand, and it's not like Batman is going to explain it!

[suzukiblu]

Thank-you sentences for @qwertynerd97; the wet nurse omegaverse. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

“Best intercept her before Jon hears her coming, then,” Bruce says briskly, already heading towards his office door. “Get her up to date on the situation and prepare her for what to expect from the kid.” 

He doesn’t in any way think that Lois would take either Carl’s presence or his total lack of pack manners badly, obviously. Lois isn’t all that manners-oriented herself and in fact typically appreciates people who don’t waste time on them outside of direct necessity. He does, however, want Clark to have a moment with his alpha before Jon goes to her smelling like another omega–and specifically like another omega’s milk. 

That’s definitely for the best, under the circumstances. 

Lois would never look at another omega and Jon would never want another mother. Of course neither of them would do that–certainly not over a situation like this one, of all damn things. Certainly not over a stray stranger half Lois’s age in a socially precarious position and likely in need of legal assistance, at a minimum. But Clark’s stressed and tired and has been worrying about a literal toddler starving to death while watching said starvation happen right in front of his eyes, so Bruce is just going to be arranging things to be a little gentler on the other’s instincts wherever possible. 

It’s just very, very much for the best, that’s all. 

“There’s not that much to expect, Bruce,” Clark says with a sigh, because no doubt he feels patronized by that treatment. 

He still follows him out of the office and to the foyer, though. 

Bruce lets them both out the front door, figuring talking on the stoop will be less likely to reach Jon’s ears. It’s a mental thing–Clark does it too. Just instinctively doesn’t listen outside of certain ranges or through certain barriers unless something catches his attention. Makes it easier to pass for human and focus on what’s immediately present, but also seems to be just a sort of subconscious sense of manners. 

Meaning yes, they’re just reflexively being polite. 

Bruce has always just assumed that the entire planet has Ma and Pa Kent to thank for that particular reflex, considering, and left it at that. 

They stand on the steps, waiting, and Clark keeps his eyes focused towards what Bruce can only assume is Lois’s approaching car. The two-hour commute from the Daily Planet isn’t ideal to be making, well–daily, but there’s only so much “work-from-home” Clark Kent and Lois Lane can do, especially when they’re not actually home and might have to explain being in a different home office than usual if a meeting came up. 

And again, they don’t want any kryptonite anywhere near this situation right now, especially not with Lor already weakened by hunger and starvation. Staying in Metropolis wasn’t an option, even if avoiding anyone noticing the Lane-Kents staying at Wayne Manor is going to be an issue. But Bruce has some cover stories mocked up just in case, and they’d all rather risk their identities than risk a child’s life. 

So–the commute for Lois, since Superman regularly flying her into work wouldn’t be any subtler, and parental leave for Clark for at least a couple of months. They’ll need something better set up for the long-term, especially now that they’ve found Carl and still not succeeded at the formula synthesization and will therefore almost definitely be staying in Gotham for the forseeable future, but . . . 

It’s a process. Bruce will figure it out. Clark and Lois need to focus on their new pup, so he’ll do the planning, and then he’ll bring it to them. They’re pack too, after all. 

And either way, someone has to do it. 

Clark doesn’t say anything as they wait. Bruce resists the urge to poke at the problem. A much more effective solution is on the way.

[linkspooky]

What do you think about the recent trend of the evil Superman? It has become more popular to portray a Superman like character as evil and even in the movies they seem more interested in showing Superman turning evil in the future rather than a symbol of hope.

This is a question I can answer despite not being super familiar with superman's lore, because I just spent a really long time going through the entirety of the Injustice Comics.

Which I think is the best example of evil superman, because in those comics themselves Clark does not really believe himself to be the bad guy and that is the problem in itself. Superman's fall from grace in those comics comes when he starts using his power not to save, but to punish perceived evil in the world around him, because he believes things like enforced police state rules, and him using his powers to assume more political control over the world will lead to him saving more people. Except it's not saving anyone. It's not about other people either, it's about Clark and his need for safety and control after suffering this huge loss in his life.

I actually think evil superman arcs are fine when they come from people who understand Clark as a character. Clark is ultimately just a human. Like he's just a dude. Everyone makes a big deal on how he's the last son of Krypton and obviously like the loss of his birth parents and his home planet is a huge part of him, but life on earth is the only life he's ever known. He was raised on earth by two normal people as parents who never treated him differently than any other child. On all levels except for biological he is a human. In fact Clark's greatest hero and inspiration is batman, because batman is a normal person with no powers who has chosen to do good anyway.

This is the mistake a lot of people make with Clark's characters, they see him as a kryptonian, or a set of super powers first. Clark Kent is like, an interpretation of the Nietzschian idea of the ubermensch. He is a man who has the ability to rise up above normal people and become a hero. However, he's like based off of the interpretation of two jewish men of that very nietzschian idea which I think is incredibly important to who Clark is as a character. Clark is the Superman, not because he has incredible powers he is gifted with, not because of any inherent superiority he is born with, but because he's just a normal person who chooses to do good. His hero is batman. Clark loves Dick Grayson. Nightwing is based off of a krytponian fairytale that Clark shared with Dick. Clark Kent is not a secret identity or even a cover for who Superman, Clark Kent is him. You could say Bruce Wayne is an act on some level for Batman though I don't interpret it this way, but there's way more pull between the batman identities and the Bruce Wayne identity. Then there is for Clark. Clark Kent is Superman. Superman is Clark Kent. They're just the same dude.

Which is why the conflict in Injustice comes not from Superman's powers corrupting him, but Clark using touch with his humanity by the loss of his connections in his life and to the world. Clark loses Lois and his child yes, but on top of that it's cited in Injustice 2 several times that Clark would never have gone as bad as he did if Bruce had been able to accept Clark and comfort him after the loss of Lois and his murder of the joker, rather than just abandoning him and leaving him to his own devices when he was crying out for a friend to help him. Clark goes bad in injustice not because of any inherent quality to Clark himself, but rather just like any person when he has his place in the world ripped from him, and loses all sense of control, he in his grief starts controlling both the people around him and the world at large to regain that sense of control.

So basically, I think when evil superman stories are from treating Clark as a human being and a person reacting to trauma, rather than a set of powers.

Invincible is another good evil superman story, though I would argue the evil superman in question in that story is not Clark, he's not even Clark adjacent. Clark is pretty much a human, whereas Omni Man is an alien, and not only that but one who believes he comes from a superior culture that has every right to dominate and colonise earth because their abilities and technology make them inherently superior. Clark is a character who never believes himself to be superior than the average dude, in fact he's just an average dude who just chooses to do good. Omin-Man comes from a culture that believes in racial superiority, and for most of his time onscreen totally buys that and practices it. So they're almost two entirely different characters, they just have similiar power sets.

Which I think is a common problem with the way modern audiences perceive Clark in general, as a set of powers. Clark isn't really superman, superman is just one of the ways Clark helps people. Clark is just Clark.

[bentbliley]

it’s 2 am but i saw someone complaining about superman and i had to throw in my two cents.

they were complaining about how superman is boring. “any freshman writer can tell you that an interesting character has weaknesses and his only weakness is a single green rock.” that’s not true. his weakness is that he’s clark kent. lois lane is his weakness, so are martha and jon, the farm he grew up on, his job at the daily planet. he not only fights for truth, justice, the american way, and a better tomorrow. he fights for the things he loves personally. to put it bluntly, if kal el were superman, he would be boring but he’s not, clark kent is.

there are two great moments i can think of that display this really well. one is zack snyder’s justice league. in bvs, barry allen tells bruce wayne that lois lane is the key. when superman is revived in justice league, he goes on a rampage but sees lois lane and remembers that’s who he is. he isn’t the most powerful being on the planet because he hails from another, he’s lois’s partner and he’s a boy from kansas just trying to do the right thing. instead of going back to his ship to reconnect, he goes to the farm he grew up on. martha finds him, and they all hug. not a single person in that hug is happy the alien is back, they’re happy clark is back.

the second is one of the old max fleischer cartoons. it happens really quick but in the mechanical monsters, lois is suspended in a cage over a cauldron of molten metal in the scientist’s lair. superman obviously comes to save the day but the scientist tells him to not move or he cuts the rope holding lois up. superman physically reacts out of fear much like orpheus turning back to look at eurydice and lois comes falling down. thankfully because superman is one of the fastest and strongest people alive, he’s able to save her while also getting closer to the scientist but his humanity jeopardized lois. if he weren’t superman, she would be dead. i can’t think of any other hero who isn’t a superman clone who could do that and i can only thank of one who would care enough to be in that situation to begin with.

another quick thing i’d like to add is that superman is a paragon, a symbol of hope. he isn’t just the most powerful man alive to metropolis, he is as inspiring to the people he serves as the statue of liberty. he lifts everyone around him by being exceptionally excellent. i’d argue that’s mighty interesting because it’s one thing to have a strong man who’s strong, it’s another to have a strong man who is kind and caring and considerate who helps everyone around him be those things. everyone wants to be kindhearted like superman. flight would be convenient and strength would be useful but if there’s superman flying around, you just wanna help people the way he does.

i believe kryptonite was created to help writers during the authoritarian reign of the comics code authority or to help lazy writers because neither of those stories even mention kryptonite. and ther was also that excellent but in the comics where he finds out shazam is an actual child and his only focus at the moment is bringing justice to who endangered billy batson. he wouldn’t be interesting if he could be injured by bullets, anyone can be. when spider-man does it, he webs up the wound and runs it off. because superman can’t, the writers and villains need to set their sights on lois or martha or something like that. peter parker can walk away from bullets, clark kent can’t walk away from heartache.

[confusedshades]

Danny between his exhaustion and cold, accidentally reverse summons himself to the mentor. Which is how he finds himself staring up at the JL, in a conference room.

Clark had quickly scanned the being who'd essentially appeared from thin air on the center table amidst the biweekly meeting. The being looked like a child, though his body's systems were behaving strangely. The heartbeat was way too slow, the temperature was borderline normal, but they were still shivering and sweating. Listening to the attempt to breathe made it obvious that they had a severe congestion as well. If this was indeed a sick human child, then perhaps a conversation would be best.

"Hello."

One very slow blink later, the child rasped out a greeting. Their first attempt at scrambling to their feet was unsuccessful, though the second one was, albeit very slow. The blanket wrapped around them didn't seem to make it any easier.

"Um, I think I sort of messed up." Clark glanced over at Batman, and then stepped forward. "Messed up how? And what's your name?"

This close, it was obvious the kid under the blanket hadn't slept in a while, and the glazed dazed look as they looked around made it obvious that they definitely needed help.

"Definitely messed up. Um, my name's Daniel Fenton. I, uh, was hoping to summon someone to help me learn the whole hero thing because I really need help, but, I think I didn't do the ritual properly. Either that or I flipped the alive-dead runes incorrectly. Does anyone know where I am? Oh man I need to get back in time for the quiz tomorrow morning...."

Either the kid hadn't slept in a while or had never learnt about giving away information to strangers. Or given that he obviously recognised who he'd appeared in front of, didn't think he was in danger. Clark could feel his eyebrows rising with each sentence out of this kid's mouth, and Bruce's whole being getting the slightest bit soft even though he'll deny doing that any time he comes across a kid who needs help.

Right. They needed to help this kid first. Hopefully before Robin got another sibling.

"Daniel,"

"Danny, please."

"Danny, I got some questions about what happened so we can help." Batman had stepped up near Clark and Clark could just hear Robin being equal parts exasperated and excited about the new sibling. When Danny nodded, Bruce continued. "When you say you wanted help with the hero thing, what do you mean?"

"I, uh, kinda have these ghosts, who hassle the town. And, uh, since I can actually fight them, I do. But, um, the thing is, I don't know what I'm doing a lot of the time, and I don't get a lot of sleep, and lots of places get destroyed, and I don't want people getting hurt accidentally but I don't want to get hurt myself so I kinda need someone to teach me."

"Are you a ghost?" Diana's question drew everyone's attention to where she stood studying the piece of paper that had apparently come with the boy. It was covered in symbols Clark didn't recognise, but given how Diana was frowning at them, it was evident she did.

"Technically, I'm a Halfa. Half alive, half dead."

"Danny, where do you stay?" The kid turned back to Batman. "I live in Amity Park, Illinois."

One look at Bruce , made a few things obvious. This kid was Phantom, the hero who'd recently become active in that town. But he clearly needed someone to guide him. Bruce was absolutely going to somehow try and take responsibility for the kid, but given the power set that Clark knew Phantom possessed, maybe Diana or J'onn would be a better idea. Flight, strength, some level of intangibility (the reporter part of his brain wondered how that worked for ghosts, but was ignored). Given the kid had also somehow reverse summoned himself, maybe even some magic training.

"I have an idea," Clark said just as Bruce opened his mouth. When everyone was looking at him, he went on. "Why don't we get you back to your home first. You take a few days to rest, get better, and then I will come by with the person I think will be able to help you. How does that sound?"

Diana's raised eyebrow across from Danny's enthusiastic nod, made it it clear she knew exactly what Clark was hoping to avoid. It would also give Mr. Contingency Plans time for research as well. Hopefully he wouldn't be set upon by Batman's brood for failing to keep the man in line. Clark may be favoured Uncle to Nightwing, but that only went so far.

Short DPXDC Prompts #926

There’s so many “Batfam/Justice League summons Danny” ideas out there. What if it was the other way around? Danny, desperate for a mentor and wisdom in defending his small town, summons a Being of Justice to help teach him how to be a vigilante.

[lovelesslittleloser]

Has anyone made a god au for the mcu?

Like, the gods are amongst us mortals, and they’ve got like followers/worshipers and stuff, and they can like access the information of their followers because they’re gods duh

I should probably specify that I’m talking about an irondad fic. I want this as an irondad fic

The great Tony Stark, god of technology, inventor and innovator, creator of things to further humanity along, with as many followers as people have phones, tvs, radios, and cars. His followers buy exclusively his tech, and the richer ones donate money to speed up his research

Hawkeye, god of archery, whose majority of followers come and go with time, but a select few stick around, devoting their life to the art of the bow & arrow

Vision, god of the internet (whose father is the god of technology, obviously), who gains power every moment someone uses the internet, and IS the robot tracking your info to give you some Useful ads, whose followers meme in his name

Bruce Banner, the god of sciences (he has SEVEN PHDS MAN), who learns all he can and shares it all with the scientific community, whose other form, Hulk, may or may not be a god in and of himself, whose followers all devote their lives to research, some on his second form specifically

Of course there’s Thor, god of thunder, and Loki, god of mischief…

But then there’s just. Peter Parker, god of spiders.

Of course, not very many people like spiders, and those who do probably don’t like them enough to devote any time to the god of them… unless they’re trying to form some weird cult or something. And there’s probably a major population of people that aren’t even aware that ‘god of spiders’ is even a thing? Like there’s probably a Wikipedia page or something that lists every god, but I doubt anyone would pay too much attention to a god of spiders.

Like maybe some people do worship him but it’s probably really weird and he’d be like ‘umm I appreciate that you’re following me, but I would prefer that you don’t sacrifice anyone to me?? Because one that’s illegal and I enjoy following laws and two,,, it kinda makes me uncomfortable so please stop’

So just imagine like. Pete having a rough day getting bullied by Flash about being the god of such a ‘creepy’ thing, when suddenly, a shout from an alleyway! He hurries to investigate and someone’s getting mugged! He webs up the threat and the person he saved is just like ‘thank you!! Who are you?’ and he just panics and says ‘uhhhh I’m spider-man’ and the rest is history :)

But then people start getting interested in Spider-Man so they google ‘is there a spider god’ and then they go harass Peter like ‘hey you’re the god of spiders, so who’s spider-man? You had to have blessed him right’ and like what does he say to that???

And imagine Tony seeing this and being like ‘hey I actually wanted to know who spider-man was too but maybe don’t harass a minor?? Like yeah he’s a god but he’s also a child’ and. Omg I need to ✨stop✨ before I ✨break✨

[superbattrash]

SuperBat: I’d rather you broke my ribs again

Hi, my name’s Misha and my brain responds well to being poked with a stick. In this case the stick is @fickle-tiction. Thanks for being my fav stick, this one’s for you, my dear. It got a little out of hand, sorry. ENJOY THO

Oh and this was of course inspired by fickle’s post here. 

Rated rrrrrrrauwr for (0.2 mentions of) sexiness and also tickles. ur welcome  

As far as first times went... it hadn't been half bad. It hadn’t been bad at all, actually, but Bruce wasn’t about to tell Clark that. The Kryptonian was already looking far too pleased with himself. He had good reason to, obviously. What with Bruce panting like a dog, rolled onto his side with his limps spread all over the bedsheets. He couldn’t find it in himself to give a damn though, he was spent.

Bruce fancied himself quite the passionate lover, but it wasn’t every day that you had Superman in your bed. He told himself it wasn’t that different from his other endeavors but even if he ignored the constant warmth (”They’re not butterflies, Alfred, I am not a child.”) in his body when Clark was near, he couldn’t deny that being with Clark was incredible.

There were just no limits to him, which Bruce usually found slightly annoying (okay, so a lot annoying, sue him for being the only actual human on the team, jealousy’s a human emotion). He’d admit that it was quite the feast in bed though – not out loud, of course, he wasn’t about to give Clark the satisfaction.

Speaking of Clark… The Kryptonian had finally finished cleaning them both off (“Just let me do this for you, B, it’s no big deal.” The stupid grin on his face said otherwise though) and settled behind Bruce in the large bed.

Bruce shuffled back discreetly. It’s not like he wanted to cuddle, but the bed was soft, and Clark was warm and – finally, strong arms wound around him. He made sure to grunt in displeasure, just to make a point. Clark shouldn’t expect this every time they’d had sex. Because oh boy, they were going to have a lot of sex if Bruce had any say. And Batman usually had a say in everything.

Clark snuggled closer, pillowing his head on his own arm while the other settled on Bruce’s hip. He then let his fingers trail lightly over Bruce’s side, around to the sensitive skin of his stomach. He enjoyed the feeling of Bruce’s skin, soft and warm and close.

Bruce sucked in a quick breath as the fingertips grazed just below his bellybutton, his stomach jumping slightly under Clark’s hand. A hand, which very quickly stopped moving.

“Are you okay?” Clark asked, worry clear in his voice, as he moved far enough away to look Bruce over. He didn’t need to move to inspect Bruce’s body, they both knew that, but the human habits ran deep in the corn-fed farm boy.

“I’m fine,” Bruce said, trying not to pout at losing Clark’s heat on his back.

“Where are you hurt?”

Bruce rolled his eyes. You forget to mention a minor injury one time (”Your ribs are broken, Bruce, how is this minor?!”) and suddenly his words weren’t enough of a reassurance. It had been an accident too; Clark hadn’t meant to shove Bruce out of the way as hard as he did.

“I’m fine,” he repeated as he turned around to face Clark, cursing his wobbly limps. “Just a bit ticklish, that’s all.” He hoped the slight annoyance on his face was enough to convince the invulnerable man lying next to him.

“Oh?” Was all Clark said in response.

Bruce should’ve known from the tone of Clark’s voice that something was up. He should’ve noticed the shit-eating grin growing on Clark’s face, but he wasn’t in his sharpest state of mind, alright? He’d just had his mind (amongst other things) blown; he needed an extra 0.3 seconds to recognize Clark’s smile as a mischievous one. To be fair Bruce wasn’t used to anyone looking at him like that, like he was some amusing puzzle. At galas and events, sure, with other partners in bed, absolutely, but those looks had always been mixed with lust, with a hint of wanting something from him. Clark’s eyes weren’t burning with the need to make him submit or take something from him - though Bruce wouldn’t have minded either if he was completely honest - it was just… an almost childlike excitement.

“Ticklish you say?”

“Yes,” Bruce said, finally catching on to Clark’s tone of voice. He instinctively tried to move away from the Man of Steel, but it was too late.

Being ticklish for Bruce meant... nothing, really. It meant sharp intakes of breath every seventh year or so when someone accidentally touched him too lightly in certain spots. It happened so rarely he hadn’t even thought up a contingency plan - which was the dumbest decision he’d ever made, if you asked him now.

Because Clark was relentless.

And those big, stupid hands of his could get in everywhere.

They were at his sides, in his armpits, being squished between his shoulder and cheek as he tried to hide his neck. Bruce couldn’t remember the last time he’d giggled, let alone squealed like this out loud. Clark found places he was ticklish Bruce hadn’t even known about. Who the hell’s ticklish in the palm of their hand?! The big brute even went as far as to pinch the thin skin on the inside of Bruce’s thighs and wasn’t that an experience he never wanted to relive?

“When was the last time anyone tickled you?” Clark teased as he pinned Bruce down with the weight of his body.

“N-never!” Bruce forced out through gritted teeth. He wasn’t going to allow Clark to humiliate him like this, but he could feel his cheeks reddening from holding back his laughter and there were actual tears in his eyes.

“Aw, I’m your first? That’s very romantic, B.”

“I will ki-hi-hi-hi-hi, I will kill you!” He spat, trying and failing to roll out from underneath the large body currently pushing him into the mattress. He’d enjoyed that particular feeling much more earlier in the evening. But then again, Clark hadn’t been shoving his hands in Bruce’s armpits back then.

“Yea, sure, you’re real intimidating right now,” Clark rolled his eyes fondly as he wiggled his fingers. “So scary, I’m nearly shaking. Oh wait, that’s you.”

“Shut u-hu-hu-hup!” Bruce laughed.

“Why don’t you make me?” Clark countered.

It’s not like Bruce didn’t try. But what can you really do against a 200-something pound mountain of an alien sitting on top of you? He didn’t stand a chance.

Somewhere between Clark grabbing at the back of his knees – and wouldn’t it be glorious if only Bruce’s knee would actually break his damn nose and not shatter his own kneecap? – and attacking a spot at the nape of his neck Bruce was suddenly enveloped in a memory he’d long since forgotten. Clark wasn’t the first one to tickle him relentlessly. His mom was.

Sudden warmth spread through him as echoes of his own childish laughter rung out through the mansion sounded in his mind. The memory had Bruce forget to cover and Clark took the opportunity to wiggle his fingers over his stomach again.

“Cl- Cla-ahahaha-ark! Stop!”

“Ask nicely,” Clark said in a singsong voice.

“I can’t -” Bruce erupted in another fit of giggles, effectively cutting off his words. “-breathe!” He wasn’t being dramatic (okay, maybe a little), he really did have a hard time catching his breath, but Clark didn’t seem too worried.

“You’ll power through it,” the Kryptonian teased.

“Ple-he-he-he-he-hease,” Bruce finally got out.

Despite his earlier almost-promise to stop, it was only when fat tears started rolling down Bruce’s heated cheeks that Clark let up in his torture.

Gasping for air Bruce shoved the other man off him – silently grateful that Clark actually moved – and threw himself on the other side of the bed, trying to get enough air into his lungs to stop panting.

“You’re very pretty when you laugh,” Clark commented with a smile. Bruce wanted to punch him. He didn’t want to risk breaking his hand (again) though.

“I hate you,” he said instead.

“No, you don’t.”

“I do,” he insisted even as the corner of his mouth struggled to turn up stubbornly. Damn. He couldn’t even keep his glare in place when Clark was looking at him like he hung the moon. 

“You don’t. You enjoy my company. And my tickles.” As if to prove his point Clark grabbed his ankle and held his hand threateningly over Bruce’s foot.

“I’d rather you broke my ribs again.”

“Drama queen.” Bruce grunted in reply and Clark continued: “You know that was an accident.”

“This wasn’t.”

“No, this was fun.”

“I will end you,” Bruce muttered as he pulled his ankle out of Clark’s grip.

“Come on then, scaredy-bat.”

Round two didn’t actually end up involving kryptonite or more tickling but it did leave quite a mess for them to clean up. It didn’t worry Bruce though; they had all the time in the world. There’s no need to rush when your boyfriend has superspeed.  And if he held Clark extra close that night while fond memories of his parents filled his dreams, well, no one had to know. 

(Not about the tickling either, Bruce would literally kill Clark if he told anyone)

(Clark didn’t know how Diana suddenly knew about Bruce’s secret spot, he really didn’t) 

[stxleslyds]

Also, the writers' failure to understand, every crime Jason committed had a motive. Attack other criminals? Holy warrior destined to purify the world of evil. Attack Bruce? Joker's still alive. (Oh, Jason, it's much worse than that.) Attack Tim? A parody of what he once was. He wasn't just a "bad boy". He was dangerously insane.

Hi, Anon! Yup, there seems to be a lot of things that writers have gotten confused about Jason Todd/Red Hood and the biggest one is his motivations to kill certain criminals.

Let’s be honest, Judd Winick set a golden path for the upcoming Red Hood writers. But each and every writer that used Red Hood in their stories completely missed the point of Jason’s character. All of them. It’s so incredibly wild to me that every other writer read UtRH and came up with whichever version of Jason they came up with.

Let’s list the writers that completely missed the point.

Geoff Johns in Teen Titans vol.3 #29.

Geoff Johns was one of the first to completely mischaracterize Jason, why on earth would Jason go to the Titans Tower to beat up Tim? This is not me saying that Jason would never do that because Jason thinks of Tim as his brother or a friend or the person that he can trust the most from the Bat-Clan (can you believe Lobdell tried to sell us that one?), this is me saying that Jason wouldn’t have done that because he couldn’t have given less of a fuck about Tim’s existence.

When Jason found out that Bruce had another Robin he wasn’t bothered by his “replacement” he was mad at Bruce for having another child playing hero after he lost his life as a fifteen-year-old. Jason didn’t even think of Tim as his replacement as fandom likes to make us believe, Jason called Tim “pretender”. And that was that, but to go from minimal recognition to go out of his way to beat him up at Titans Tower is a massive mischaracterization.

Paul Dini in Countdown (to Final Crisis).

Paul Dini in Countdown did absolutely nothing with Jason, I am sorry but that’s all he did. Him writing Jason was like watching a dog trying to catch their own tail. He started with a pretty basic take on UtRH Jason, then he added a bit of Jason being an annoying man with Donna, then we had the jealousy arc because apparently, Jason had the hots for Donna but she didn’t want anything to do with him and he was all angsty when she paid attention to Kyle instead of him, and then, later on, he had that whole Red Robin bullshit (I am sorry about this, but I absolutely hated that, it was so dumb, I am so glad it didn’t last long because it was just too bad), and after all that mix of just not interesting stuff he went right back to the Jason that he had at the very start. It was a waste of time, but I guess that he had to be there because he was an anomaly and all that. I just think that was DC’s first try at making Jason Todd/Red Hood something more than just a street-level vigilante and they failed miserably.

Tony S. Daniel in Batman: Battle for the Cowl.

Even though the first two did make mistakes with Jason’s characterizations, this man was the first to just throw UtRH out of the window and make up his very own version of Jason Todd. And his version was horrendous, that Jason had no problem with attempting to kill children and innocent people, he also really wanted to be Batman because Gotham needed a Batman and he wanted to be the person to wear the Cowl and he was looking for a Robin for himself.

I know, the whole concept is the perfect opposite of what Jason Todd and Red Hood were in UtRH. Every aspect of BftC Jason is based on nothing.

Jason wanting to be Batman because Gotham needed Batman is just the beginning of what’s wrong in this book. Jason became the Red Hood (in part) because he believed that Batman and his ways weren’t what Gotham needed so he made a better version of Batman with Red Hood (according to him) because Red Hood did what Batman refused to do. Another thing that is just wrong is Jason wanting, Damian, Tim or Dick to be his Robin, there is just so much wrong with this, first of all, Jason wanted Batman to stop having Robin because child soldiers ran the risk of dying at a very young age and that’s exactly how he saw the whole thing because that was what had happened to him. Second, if Jason was mad at Bruce for getting another Robin why would he now want one of his own to team up with his Batman? Damian was a child, Tim was someone that apparently Jason hated (because Jason beating Tim was mentioned in this event), and then Jason actually asked Dick Grayson, Nightwing, to be his Robin? Listen, there is no way that was Jason, nothing about him makes sense, even taking into account that Jason had beaten Tim already in this event Jason actually tried to kill both Tim and Damian (it might have been just one of them but yeah, it still doesn’t make sense).

I just don’t think that Tony S. Daniel knew who Jason Todd was, maybe he got confused but the thing is, his “villainous” and deranged version of Jason Todd allowed a villainous and deranged version of Red Hood to happen with the next writer that I will be talking about.

Grant Morrison in Batman and Robin vol.1 #3-6.

This was the birth of the villainous, deranged and bloodthirsty Red Hood. There is absolutely no trace of UtRH Jason here, not even if we are looking at the opposite of things like we could do with Daniel’s Jason. Grant Morrison wanted Dick and Damian to have a villain to match their Batman and Robin and they decided to give us a red-haired-pill-headed-red hood. Everything from Morrison’s characterization of Jason is crazy, from the red hair (hello pre-crisis) to the awful Joker’s Red Hood looking suit, everything was just weird.

I still don’t believe that was Jason, to be honest, I would rather think that version of Jason was actually a rouge Skrull that came all the way from the Marvel Universe and lost his way in Gotham City. Maybe when he made the jump between universes, he got too much information and got confused and took the form of the wonkiest Jason Todd he could come up with.

This Jason was absolutely deranged, he knew exactly what he was doing and he didn’t care if innocents died. This Jason was the one that got locked up in Arkham. This is the Jason that Dick put in Arkham for Jason and everybody else’s safety.

Dick putting that Jason in Arkham wasn’t a bad thing or something that anyone can use to shit on Dick Grayson (not on this house). This Arkham was reformed and that Jason knew that if he stayed in that new Arkham he would stay away from trouble, but here is the thing, that Jason loved trouble, so he took all the tests to prove he wasn’t insane and asked to be transferred to Blackgate (where all the Red Hood’s enemies were). That Jason didn’t ask to be sent to Blackgate because the Joker was a cell away from his in Arkham, he did it so he could go on a killing spree in Blackgate (which he did when he got there).

Skrull Jason was just bloodthirsty and nothing like UtRH Jason, he had no motive other than just killing for fun or whatever. He didn’t want to protect Gotham and he couldn’t have cared less about the drug trade in Gotham. In Batman and Robin vol.1. Jason Todd was unrecognizable. And luckily, we never saw him again.

Scott Lobdell in Everything that he ever wrote about Red Hood.

This one is pretty self-explanatory. Lobdell was the king of overpowering Jason, he was the one that drove Red Hood farther and farther away from his street-level vigilante status. He continuously added more to him, he was a big deal because he was meant to take down Ra’s al Ghul, he was a big deal because he was the only human to train in the All-Castle and learned to summon the All-Blades.

This Red Hood’s morals and ideals were kind of gone, there just wasn’t any kind of interest in Jason to get rid of drugs or try to control its trade in Gotham, he just had no interest in street-level threats, everything was extraordinary in both New 52 and Rebirth. If he wasn’t in space he was in some mystical land. His friends and allies became even more and more powerful, his level of power was completely off compared to the others. His personality was ever-changing and quite honestly you could barely see the Jason that he once was.

This Jason also was very inconsistent in the way that he felt towards people (obviously because Lobdell is a shitty writer), he wanted to follow Batman’s rules and was shown as someone that still had fond memories of his life with Bruce before he died but was also willing to let those memories go, to move on? Maybe? I don’t know. But he changed his mind about Bruce and following his rules or not for a very long time. Jason was also a little bitch about Dick, and he was a little bitch because he (Lobdell) never gave the reader or anyone a concrete reason as to why he hated him so much and then in Rebirth he decided that Dick wasn’t that bad. Also, Jason went from “Willis Todd, abusive husband and father that deserved to die” to “Willis Todd abusive husband and father but he sent me letters when he was in prison and Penguin had him killed so now, I really want to avenge him”. Yeah, I don’t really know why that happened and like most of Lobdell’s arcs and stuff it was never really completed or well thought out.

Lobdell’s Jason characterization was a mess for ten years and that’s the prime reason why Jason is a character with no solid background, story or future.

James Tynion IV in Red Hood and the Outlaws.

Tynion’s Jason Todd was a hero, he was like a mini Tom King Batman. Everything he did was right and there was just no way that you could bamboozle him. This Jason was able to hold to Blades that drained his soul as well as hosting the Untitled in his body (that were able to drain his soul too) and on top of all that he completed his journey of the Chosen One by making those ancient martial arts moves that he learned before he was Robin even though Talia hadn’t been able to master it yet.

Scott Snyder, Tim Seeley in Batman Eternal and Batman and Robin Eternal.

A mess, this was pure New 52 levels of bullshit and they all just wanted to push the “Batfamily” and while Dick was gone, they were trying to make Jason fill the void that Dick left in Batman events. It didn’t work at all and all they did was mess around with Jason’s characterization more.

Geoff Johns in Three Jokers.

I have talked enough about Johns’ takes on Jason Todd and Red Hood, but let me tell you something real quick, if a writer thinks that the best they can do with a character is make them give up their morals/ideals for an unrequited love interest, then they can keep that idea for themselves. Geoff Johns wrote a book that was absolutely not needed and then proceeded to butcher every characterization that he could, Three Jokers was three issues long and he managed to add more trauma to Jason’s torture, push the narrative of Jason being at fault for his own murder and make Jason’s motivations to be the Red Hood weak enough to make him want to give up his work for a woman that he barely knows (and doesn’t like him at all).

Joshua Williamson in Future State: Red Hood and Robin #5.

Now, with Williamson I have issues only when he writes Jason, not because his stories are bad, don’t get me wrong, I would have completely enjoyed FS: Red Hood if it weren’t for the completely unnecessary Rose/Jason side plot he had going on. Jason was clearly working undercover for some people that he hated working with. He had to arrest or kill “masks” (vigilantes, just like he “used” to be) for the Magistrate.

His ideas were pretty solid, Jason did the job but he never killed the masks and actively didn’t trust the Magistrate but he was working there to tear them apart from within, and that’s amazing if Williamson had given us Jason Todd/Red Hood working undercover to dismantle an organization I would have been really happy.

But that’s not all he gave us, even if I just forget about his failed attempt at giving Jason a relationship, I can still see that Williamson is the kind of writer that wants (or is just following DC) to make the “Batfamily” happen no matter how dumb and out of place it looks in comics’ canon. So, I am a little bit weary, any writer that leans too much towards making Jason and Bruce work together and become a family makes me want to scream, but I do understand that is just me, many people want those two to be buddy-buddy, I, personally, would love to see Jason kick Bruce in the balls and tell him to lose his number.

Chip Zdarsky in Urban Legends: Cheer.

Ah, yes, I remember the days in which I thought that this could have been something good. Well, I was utterly wrong and I suffered all the way through this mini. I feel like now I can safely say that Zdarsky only wanted to write a Batman book but DC told him, “Hey you can write Batman but it has to be within a Red Hood story, but don’t worry, you don’t have to know much about the Hood guy, just come up with something and write Batman around that”.

I know that’s what happened because I read that story and all we got from it was horrible characterizations for pre-Robin Jason, Robin Jason, Jason Todd and Red Hood. I don’t know how he did it but yes, he managed to mess it all up.

From Jason not really wanting to be Robin and acting recklessly every step of the way, to secret desires of a perfect family with Bruce and so many other people that he couldn’t care about, Urban Legends: Cheer is the perfect book to avoid at all costs if you believe that the concept of “Batfamily” is the biggest lie, DC is trying to profit off this time around.

Zdarsky also nerfed Jason in ways that I thought DC only wanted to nerf Dick Grayson. But I was able to see that I was wrong. Zdarsky’s run also pushed some of the most disastrous narratives that DC really wants readers to believe like: Robin Jason wasn’t good at his job, he was too reckless and ultimately his death was his own fault. Yay! I want to cry!

I will give Zdarsky two points for at the very least showing that Red Hood wants to protect children and that he has a huge issue with how the drug trade is controlled and abused in Gotham City, it had been a while since we had seen that aspect of Jason’s Red Hood make an appearance.

-

It’s just too many writers completely missing the point of Red Hood’s character or simply writers agreeing to destroy Jason’s uniqueness in the DC Universe so DC (as the publisher) can further push the abomination that is the “Batfamily” in comics’ canon.

I do agree with you Anon when you say that Jason isn’t just a “bad boy” but I also don’t think that we can call UtRH Jason “dangerously insane”. Personally, I will only use that last description for BftC and Batman and Robin Jason, those two were dangerously insane indeed.

UtRH Jason was very meticulous in who he wanted dead and who got to live. He entered Gotham’s most dangerous world and he had to make a big entrance, he invited the eight most prosperous street dealers to a meeting, showed up with the decapitated heads of each of their right-hand men and an AK-47 and said:

“I am offering you a deal. I will be running the drug trade from now on. You will go about your business as usual. You will kick up forty percent to me. That is a much better deal than the Black Mask will give you. In return, you will have total protection from both the Black Mask and Batman. The catch? You stay away from kids and schoolyards. No dealing to children, got it? If you do, you’re dead.”

This was Red Hood! Red Hood wanted to control the drug trade in Gotham because he knew that Gotham is far too corrupt and filled with drug lords for him to just want to eradicate drugs from Gotham. If he had tried that he would have been a dumbass, but he wasn’t. He didn’t want to start a gang war and get innocent people killed because of it, he wanted to set the rules of his new Empire and he had to start with the street-level drug dealers, from there he grew until he became a major pain in Black Mask’s ass.

We went from Jason wanting to control the drug trade and take over Gotham’s underworld so people like Black mask couldn’t have people work for him (or being dependent on him) when they were still in high school or were in a vulnerable position, to Jason fighting a war for a mystic land because he was their “Chosen One”. DC really wanted to do something grand (yet boring) with Jason instead of sticking to a street-level vigilante that could have become a Drug Lord to control the drug trade of a city that is so filled with crime and corruption that it can’t be saved by anyone.

Batman doesn’t eradicate crime, he “controls” it, puts a blank it over it, lets it nap up until it wakes up once more to make more mess.

Red Hood had other plans, certain criminals didn’t get to nap, or, better said, they would get to nap forever.

So, no. I wouldn’t call that “dangerously insane”, I will call that “vigilante that believes himself judge, jury and executioner” of a city that is drowning in crime and corruption.

Anyway, I hope you have a really nice week Anon and thank you so much for sending me this ask!

[khimeaarts]

A what if meeting could be like: (I also imagine him being de-aged depending on his ghost age so like maybe 5 years had passed and many things happened for him to have so much malice but in a small scale cause he's a kid)

Danny: *burning something in GZ* Oh that looks damn fine.

The bats: *staring at the kid with hands on his hips being proud of his destruction*

Dick: He kinda looks like a mini-damian...

Tim: Acts like one too.

Damian: Shut it Drake.

Danny: *notices his audience* Oh hi! You're not from around here, obviously. *mutters* Does clockwork have anything to do with this? *out loud* What are you guys some kind of bat cult- hey why do you look like me but with green eyes? That's so weird. Are you a clone?

Damian: YOU are the clone. Did you not know?

Danny: No way! I've always been me! Where is your proof, without it you can't make me the clone! (Already thinking of his missing memories while panicking inside)

Damian: Stop being a fool. It'll only delay the inevitable.

Danny: But... but-

Dick: Doesn't seem like an evil clone to me (whispers)

Jason: Are you seriously ignoring the huge fire and property damage behind him?

Tim: Evil is a subjective word.

Jason: Wow replacement you're in on it too?

Dick: What? You're not? Isn't he adorable? Look at those chubby cheeks! We didn't get a chance to see that on Dami!

Tim: On second thought. He does look too evil now to me. (One demon brat is enough)

Back to Damian and Danny:

Danny: *already in tears cuz he's 5 rn* I didn't know (Thinking about his adoptive family, his past, Jazz, Dani, everyone, why nobody told him)

Damian: *sighs while pinching in between his eyebrows* You do not appear to have malice towards your original so it does not really matter. Would you like to come with us? (Already proceeding to think about how to locate the people who did this, know more about his mini-me's past, and decide whether he'd have to make someone pay for their transgressions)

Danny: What?

Damian: You do not need to decide now.

Dick: Yes! I'd be glad to know more about you mini-dami- oh I mean what is your name? Could you tell us?

Danny: Danny...

Dick: Danny! Nice to finally meet you! You can definitely come with us and maybe you'd get to eat Alfred's cookies- wait- does ghost eat human food?

Danny: No they don't... but I'm half dead half alive that came back just like that guy- (points at Jason)

Jason: Half what me?! *points at himself*

Tim: *rolls his eyes* This is going to take awhile... (wishing he brought coffee with him)

---------------

Danny will be a part of batfam while the bats get to know more about Danny's life. I see Damian becoming softer as time passed by teaching his mini-me (his blood kid) the ways of being the best Robin there is (he's already thinking of taking Danny as his Robin when he becomes batman XD)

And then Tim would be there taking the L because Damian will use him as targets for their practices just cause he's still a petty teenager hahahaha

Bruce would be there thinking ways how to teach his son how to properly take care of a child but really he has no idea so he had to always ask Alfred for these sessions - they all know- but he's doing his best so they don't call him out that much - they still do (specially Jason, he loved visiting the house for these sessions just to spite his dad)

Barbara, Steph, and Cass, will coo over this new child and spoil their nephew with gifts. Tim thinks it's too much but the girls doesn't care, they love their little nephew being a menace hahahaha Actually they already started to plan for his future date scenarios and promised to teach the boy how to properly woo a girl XD Dick approves! He specially started a collection of photos in an album when Danny became more comfortable in their home. He bribed Tim to help with either more time away from Damian and the brat cause Dick would distract them for some personal time or more love advises with Bernard.

All in all, Danny perfectly fits as the youngest child in the family. Danny found a new family with the bats ^^

"Come get your child." Robin stared incredulously at this...entity? Being? He was a child himself, how could he possibly have a kid of his own.

The creature huffed, seeming very put out by the young vigilantes confusion. "What is there to not understand? Your child has been running wild in the Infinite Realms for a while now. Ever since that portal exploded hes been taking his emotions out on everyone!" The thing said, throwing her hands into the air, "And you!" Robin stepped back a pace or two when he suddenly found a very sharp claw in his face, "I had to do a lot of searching to even find you! What kind of parent are you?!"

"I'm not."

The entity opened and closed its mouth a few times like a fish before suddenly becoming furious, "Its no wonder hes like this when his gardian has so little interest in him! Did you know the other day he plugged a liquor bottle with a cloth and lit it on fire? I don't even know where he got it, but he lit the cloth and yelled something like, "mazzle toff" and threw it at my own adult son!"

"..."

"When my little boy burst into flames do you know what he said to me?"

"...no, but I feel like you're going to tell me anyways."

"I'm sorry ma'am I wasn't expecting there to be that much fire."

"That much? So he fully intended to set someone ablaze but the amount of fire is what troubled him?"

"Yes!" She growled, exasperated, "Please come get your child as soon as possible! Hes terrorizing the whole dimension!"

Damian found himself staring at open space the woman had occupied previously before contacting Oracle through the coms, "Did you get all of that?"

It was Grayson that spoke, "Every word."

---

Aka Danny has a lot of misplaced aggression and kinda terrorizes parts of the GZ. Unfortunately for him hes a clone of one of the bats (weather or not you want it to be Damian, Project R or someone else that hes cloned from is up to you) and they're coming to him to assess if he's an evil clone or mindless or whatever.

Too bad Danny sucks at first impressions.

[youngbugandtonystank]

what's the difference between what wanda did to those people in wandavision and what tony did with ultron?

I have so many asks about this. Hate asks, and people wondering what’s going on. This is the only one I’m answering.

Both of them are responsible for their actions. I’ve seen people try and take away either Tony’s responsibility for that or Wanda’s engagement and accountability. 

In Tony’s case, the Ultron program was supposed to be a global peacekeeping program to protect the people, acting as a suit around the world to prevent events like the Battle of New York. He was doing it in the name of peace and safety. Tony was rightfully scared because he was the only one who knew what was coming. Wanda intentionally enhanced that fear in him and this drove him to create Ultron with Bruce. He has responsibility for it. Same as Bruce. He owns up to this, he took full responsibility and agreed that they needed to be regulated. 

Tony Stark: A few years ago, I almost lost her, so I trashed all my suits. Then, we had to mop up HYDRA... and then Ultron. My fault.

--

Tony Stark: There's no decision-making process here. We need to be put in check! Whatever form that takes, I'm game. If we can't accept limitations, if we're boundary-less, we're no better than the bad guys.

--

Tony Stark: That's good. That's why I'm here. When I realized what my weapons were capable of in the wrong hands, I shut it down and stop manufacturing.

--

If people think he needs to be in jail for it, then I’m guessing the rest of the Avengers too since all of them have made mistakes and killed people too. As a matter of fact, after the events of Wandavision, I’m sure that Wanda should be in the Raft, but because she’s ‘a poor baby’ yall won’t think she deserves that. 

SPOILERS

It’s a big possibility that we don’t have all the info about what happened in Wandavision but we’re going to go with what we know so far. 

In Wanda’s case, she did it to appease her grief and pain, and I can understand why she would get to that point, she’s been through a lot and maybe she was about to lose her mind. Instead of recruiting Wanda after the Sokovia incident, they should’ve given this girl treatment for her mental health problems. She just lost her brother and passed through a very traumatic war zone, of course she needs assistance. Cap and Natasha were the ones responsible for her because they were training the ‘new’ avengers. Sam was with them and he used to be a counselor to veterans with PTSD. He could’ve helped Wanda with some of her traumas. As shown in the series, Wanda did the whole hex business before meeting Agatha, which means creating that little reality was all Wanda’s responsibility. Hayward and Agatha did exactly what Wanda did to Tony (and the avengers/other people) in AOU. They manipulated her and played with her emotional traumas. Hayward showed her Vision’s body parts and Agatha started to pull strings to know how Wanda did what she did and her real powers while orchestrating against her. 

Both of them have made mistakes. No one is better than the other. I don’t understand why some fans want to make someone responsible more than the other or blame one character for the other. While Wanda gave Tony that vision and pushed his self-destructive side to obsess over saving the world, he did create Ultron, what Tony didn’t predict was that the robot was going to corrupt itself. Same with Wanda, while Agatha and Hayward contributed to her trauma, she held hostage and isolated 3,892 people to create her perfect reality, ripping these people away from their identities and free will to fit her own fantasy. Don’t turn this into ‘omg poor her, it’s Tony fault that she’s this way'. I can’t believe I have to repeat this but you don’t see Peter Parker obsessively looking for the person who manufactured the gun instead of the criminal who actually killed Uncle Ben. Ridiculous that I have to repeat this example. 

Oh and about Vision’s body (damn yall have a gift to turn everything into Tony’s fault for some reason). I can’t believe some of you think Tony (while grieving for 5 years) would give Vision to Hayward. You’re either pulling stuff out of your asses or you didn’t pay attention to the show. Maria Rambeau founded and was the Director of S.W.O.R.D. In 2018 (when IW happened), this is where she came up with a new policy within S.W.O.R.D. to ground snapped agents in case they ever returned. Maria was diagnosed with cancer, then two years later (2020), she passed away. Then, Hayward was promoted to Director of S.W.O.R.D., in his first years (2020-2022) he refocused the organization’s work from extraterrestrial operations to robotics, nanotechnology and artificial intelligence, etc. There, that was the 5 years. Then in 2023 it’s when he started project Cataract, which revolved around rebuilding Vision as a sentient weapon. Tony was dead when this happened. How come yall don’t get this part? I don’t understand, do you really think his dead corpse signed some papers to give Vision to those people? LMAO

Instead of thinking Tony would give up Vision just like that, think (possibilities):

Maria was the head of S.W.O.R.D., she might have just been keeping his body safe without doing anything with him. Maybe she trusted Hayward and he, obviously, betrayed her because he’s turning her organization into something else after her death. 

One of the Sokovia Accords regulations states that the use of technology to bestow individuals (the term ‘enhanced individual’ in this book is defined as any person, human or otherwise, with superhuman capabilities) with innate capabilities is strictly regulated by the government, as is the use and distribution of highly advanced technology. Vision signed those accords ('I'm saying there may be a casualty. Our very strength invites challenge. Challenge incites conflict. And conflict... breeds catastrophe. Oversight...oversight is not an idea that can be dismissed out of hand’) The Avengers were no longer be a private organization and they operate under the supervision of the United Nations. This means they (UN) were the ones that referred Vision’s body to S.W.O.R.D., to a trustworthy leader, Maria. 

Vision died in Wakanda, not in New York. Tony was missing for 22 days after the snap, the rest of the avengers should’ve taken responsibility for his body.  

Why is it always Tony’s fault but never consider that other parties are also involved in this? 

I want to address some other asks with this one. I know some of you are angry because people are starting to blame Tony all over again, so a few things to remember:

Tony did not create the Accords. The Accords were the result of all the collective actions the Avengers have done in their superhero careers. All of them have made mistakes and the collateral damage of that was taken into consideration by the government and 117 countries around the world. He signed the accords because he knew that he could amend them with the support of the rest of the avengers and he knew about Thanos (something big was coming). 

Obadiah Stane (it’s so bizarre for me seeing that some people don’t know who this guy is, I’m guessing that the people who are watching Wandavision are too young to remember or didn’t watch the Iron Man movies at all which is highly probable) was the one selling weapons to the wrong people, not Tony. Obadiah was the CEO of Stark industries and became second-in-command for two decades. He grew jealous of Tony and began cooperating with the Ten Rings in Afghanistan, selling them Stark Industries weapons illegally. Imagine blaming all of it on Tony when Obadiah basically murdered thousands only because he felt a little green. If someone who you trust (he had no reasons to doubt Obadiah since he was like a second father-figure for him) does something behind your back (take into consideration that people like Pepper; who was Tony’s assistant and had knowledge of all of Tony’s activities and responsibilities, Rhodey; who was the liaison between the military in the department of acquisitions and Stark Industries, and Happy Hogan; who was his personal bodyguard and Head of Security of Stark Industries, didn’t know what Stane was doing either), how are you going to know about it? Tony trusted him. And when he realized what was going on he immediately stopped all of it. He worked hard to be better and people overlook that because they want other characters to look better. 

Don’t act like Tony was the only one assisting the military. All of the avengers assisted in one way or another. Natasha (who used to be an assassin) was in the Red Room, trained in the Black Widow Program in association with Leviathan and the Soviet Armed Forces, served for KGB, etc. Bruce Banner used to work for the United States government and was commissioned to create a super serum for them. Same goes with the rest, Sam, Clint, etc. Steve Rogers was a soldier lmaoooooooooooooo like, what happened to Tony with Obadiah happened to Steve with SHIELD/HYDRA in TWS. He trusted the people working in there (SHIELD), served for them, did missions for them and as soon as he found out what they were doing behind his back he turned against them. 

Knowing all of this, how is Tony always the villain for yall? I’m guessing because Tony’s popularity in the MCU, but still, aren’t yall tired of not understanding the plot and having people repeat it to you constantly? Watch the movies if you want to understand the franchise, people. Stop following the crowd. 

Also, Wanda is not a kid, she’s a 35 year old woman in Wandavision, she was 26 in AOU and 27 in CW. Hardly a child. Tony had almost her same age (38) when he realized Obadiah was selling illegal weaponry behind his back. The only reason people don’t fully forgive Tony is because 1. he’s a man and 2. he’s a billionaire. Even if Wanda was poor she still killed and hurt many people over the course of her life. Stop trying to make Tony the villain only to downplay Wanda’s actions. 

Both have killed people, both have made mistakes. They’re both responsible for them. 

[river-bottom-nightmare]

Nightwing #80 Review

woot woot i’ve kept it up for three issues lets gooo. i liked this issue more than the last one. there’s a lot of fanon dick characterization peppered in, but not so much that it puts me off entirely. also, i’m getting increasingly concerned about bitewing. but i did like tim in this one, very nice

look at all the blue and purple and pink. honestly at this point, i’m a broken record but come on come on come onnnnnnn. the blue and pink is very pretty though. this cover’s a bit offputting at first, and a bit spiraly, which i’m sure was the intended effect.

this is a genuine concern of mine. dick’s a vigilante, and he doesn’t have the same sprawling network and resources that bruce does. (even if he is a billionaire now, he hasn’t amassed the same collection of crime-fighting equipment that bruce has.) 

i’m not sure if he’ll be able to take care of bitewing. damian’s got plenty of pets, but alfred used to take care of them, and now bruce plus the rest of the batfam is taking care of them. as far as we know, babs only drops by occasionally, and the same goes for dick’s family and friends. will dick be able to give bitewing the love and time and affection that a traumatized puppy like her needs? i really hope so.

she does look adorable in this panel tho.

dick. richard. richie. baby. why are you shirtless.

you have scars upon scars. probably chemical burns. bullet wounds. weird fucking squiggly lines from knives that only psychos with blade fetishes use. no normal person has the body that you do. and you don’t think that showing up shirtless in front of the police is going to raise suspicion? you don’t think that the people accusing you of murder are going to look at someone who looks like they’re a fucking mob enforcer and go hmm that’s a bit suspicious?

put on a SHIRT jesus CHRIST it’s like you’re not even trying to hide your identity.

look at this pompous little princess demanding only the highest quality head pets i’d burn down latvia for her. (no offense latvians it was the first country that popped into my head.)

pretty boy pretty boy pretty boy pretty boy-

no seriously kudos to the artist here. his expression is so human i wanna cry. dick, right now, is sheepishly asking a question. he knows he’s not going to get into any real trouble, he knows that he’ll be able to talk his way out of or somehow maneuver his way off this mess. but he’ll play nice for the police, so he’s asking a friend for a favour, part self-condescendingly and part oh-well-what-can-you-do.

and his expression reflects that. rather than a stoic expressionless face most male comic characters have when asking someone for something (or all the time really), rather than the weird desperate supposedly “seductive” face that most female comic characters plus dick grayson have when asking someone for something (or all the time really), he’s making a face that i pulled like yesterday. or the day before that. it’s kind of silly, kind of casual, very much human. i like it.

thank god. proper (in character) acknowledgement for officer grayson. yea, fuck cops in general, but i like that they included this line.

obviously, he’s not talking about the actual criminals, he’s talking about the police force itself. the bpd was too corrupt, and dick realized that he wasn’t helping. not only does one clean cop not make a dent in an overall dirty force, but dick was putting his allies in danger too. not only that, but it wasn’t good for dick’s mental health either. he was spreading himself too thin, and surrounding himself with some of the worst of crime 24/7 did a number on him. dick’s got a history of self-sacrificing tendencies, and i’m just glad he’s not a cop anymore.

dick has a gotham rogues mug. they make gotham rogue mugs, and dick has one.

what kinda city looks at it’s frankly horrible crime history and long list of certifiably insane serial killers who are all still alive and actively committing war crimes and goes “oooooh yea imma put that on a coffee mug!” gotham, that’s who.

this isn’t important i just like how all of bitewing’s barks are blue

back straight, hand on his hip, cheerful smile on his face as he says he’s being accused for murder. love that for him.

they couldn’t have said “yea it’s complicated” in a better way even if they put the words “yea it’s complicated” right there on the page in bold red letters. literally all the love to the artists.

dick please. you’re KILLING ME what the actual fuck IS THAT???? WHY DO YOU HAVE A MUG OF THAT???

anyway nightwing collects novelty mugs confirmed.

this paneling is so beautiful. 

tim’s the focus, but he’s not the first thing you see. he’s placed in a way that forces the reader to drag their eyes all the way up the page in order to reach him. it us know just how high up tim is carelessly crouching, especially close to the ledge of the building too. i cannot think of a single better way to introduce a character, and this character in particular: you instantly know this is a version of tim with plenty of experience and training, is comfortable in his body and knows his limits, but still hangs onto that civilian awe of being in a high place and overlooking a brightly lit city.

absolute classic robin. i love it. 

this isn’t even that important but it made me happy. this is how you train surf.

you don’t crouch or bend over when you get to a tunnel, which is oddly enough what most people think (at least from my experience). you bend backward. that not only 100% ensures that you’ll make sure you’re low enough to make it through the tunnel (because you can see the top of the tunnel, unlike when you crouch or bend), but it also makes it easier to get up: all you have to do is push up with your arms into a bent stance, and you’ll be in a ready, moving position. from a bend or a crouch, getting up is more awkward and more slow.

on a meta level, i like that this creative team knows what they’re doing when it comes to the small, almost unimportant stuff like that, because it makes the action more real. (as real as you can get with a guy running around stealing hearts.)

on a in-universe level, it once again drives home both dick and tim’s experience and professional level skill.

regardless of who you side with in the “should tim drake be robin again?” debate, you gotta admit that tim’s rebirth robin suit is r a d as fuck. if i’m not mistaken, this is the same one he was wearing in 2019 young justice for a little bit? it’s cute and hella cool i like it.

remember what i said about human expressions? doesn’t happen as often to tim bc he’s a Child, but it’s still nice to note when someone humanizes him, too. (that’s why i love the duckboy panel so much lol.)

me, at first: that’s not a “good call” dick that’s just common sense

me, now: sprinkled throughout the entire comic we can see dick bending to tim’s instructions if only briefly, joking with him to keep the mood light while still maintaining a serious mood and retaining control over this particular outing. this implies that dick’s doing it intentionally, purposefully leaving places in his sentences blank and offering affirmations, in order to encourage tim and train him in things bruce might not necessarily touch on, such as social chameleoning and misdirection techniques and love/affirmation from a family member. dick is not only a loving and supportive big brother, but he never stops training his younger brother in better vigilante tecnhiques because he wants tim to be better than him. in this essay i will-

d o g g o

also bitewing is getting so many head pats today i’m living for it

look at him, standing on a telephone wire with ease. nice flex, dick.

also look at how he’s silhouetted. the moon’s full bright, bright enough that the sky around dick is light, too. (at least. i’m like 99% sure that’s the moon.) not like most batman comics, where it’s sometimes hard to distinguish bruce from the background, which is entirely on purpose.

gotham is a dark gritty city, and so is bruce. the two of them are one. bludhaven may be a bit of a mess, but it’s being portrayed in all these different shades of blue and purple and pink, that are all light enough that dick stands out from the background. he hasn’t been swallowed up by the city, and chances are that he won’t ever be. also, the colouring helps establish bludhaven as a city too. there’s still hope for it. the light colouring means that it’s not going to sink into a pit as deep as the one bruce wove gotham into. the whole point of this nightwing arc in particular is to turn bludhaven into a better place, and it’s (most likely) letting us know early on that dick is going to accomplish that. he’ll struggle, but he’ll do it.

so dick??? dick designed his escrima sticks with a situation like this in mind? he created his signature and most iconic weapon (other than his chatty mouth), with a built in feature that turns his escrima sticks into tim’s signature and most iconic weapon???? just so that if he and tim ever got into a situation where tim didn’t have his staff, dick could make sure tim had the thing that would give him an edge over anyone he was fighting??? he’s such a big brother oh my goddd.

also tim’s smirk in this is just *chef kiss.* a staff is something he can work with, a staff is something he wields like an extension of his arm, a staff is means that someone’s about to get their ass kicked because tim’s about to beat the shit outta them.

this is my new phone background.

they really made sure we remembered that hey, those first few months when bruce was grieving too much to be any sort of a mentor to tim and was still unwilling to properly train him to be robin out of fear that he would end up like jason, dick was the one who stepped up (once he got over himself and his own fears and hangups with bruce) and trained tim to be robin, trained him how to fight and flip and fuckin fly out there, all while changing his own style a bit to be the more experienced one in the partnership while still trusting said partner to hold their own, so dick and tim have a very unique and cohesive fighting style that makes it hell for anyone who fights them together, didn’t they?

[hintofelation99]

Jason Chaperons Damian's Field Trip

Damian and Jason in the Batcave trying to murder each other

Jason: I'm going to kill you demon brat!

Damian: Ha! I'd like to see you try Todd!

Fighting continues for the next two days

Bruce: That's it! Jason, Damian, no more fighting. You two are going to bond even if it kills you!

Jason: Again?

Bruce: Not the time Jason!

Damian, rolling his eyes: And how exactly do you expect me to bond with this barbarian?

Bruce: A trip to the art museum.

Damian and Jason look confused.

Bruce: Damian's class is going to the Gotham art museum next Friday. I was going to chaperon, but since you both decided to try and stab each other in public I have some PR matters to attend to. So, Jason will chaperon.

Damian: That is absolutely ridiculous father. Is it not enough that I am already forced to see subpar art with snot nosed brats? Now I have to take the zombie?!

Jason: Watch it brat!

Damian: Tt

Jason and Damian glare at each other.

Bruce: No, your brother is taking you to see world renowned art with your peers.

Jason: C'mon Bruce, world renowned? It's the Gotham art museum.

Bruce, glaring: Fine. Country renowned.

Jason raises his eyebrows.

Bruce: Don't push it. I'll call the school and let them know that you're taking my place.

--> The Next Friday <--

Jason: Damian! Get your ass down here!

Damian: I am right beside you Todd.

Jason: Where's your tie? And your blazer? Where's your backpack?

Damian: Calm down Todd. I have never been late for school and I do not plan to deviate from that today.

Jason: Whatever. Just be ready in the next five minutes, I want to get coffee first and we are not going to be late.

Damian: Pennyworth has already brewed a pot of that infernal drink.

Jason: And Tim has already called dibs on the entire pot. That kid is scrawny, but when it comes to coffee he's vicious.

Damian: Tt.

-------

Damian: STOP THE CAR RIGHT NOW TODD!

Tires screech as Jason whips into a parallel parking spot in front of the school. Damian's entire class watches this happen. They look terrified.

Damian, jumping out of the car, cursing in Arabic: Are you trying to murder me?!

Jason, casually getting out of the car with a Frappuccino, shrugs: I told you we wouldn't be late.

Damian: WE ARE THIRTY MINUTES LATE!!

Jason, shrugs: Oops.

-------

Teacher: Ok class! This is Jason Todd, he is Damian's older brother and he will be helping out on the field trip today. I expect you all to be on your best behavior today! Now Mr. Todd, would you like to tell us a little about yourself?

Jason, feet on a desk not paying attention, glaring at Damian.

Teacher: Mr. Todd?

Jason chokes on Frappuccino, stands up.

Jason: Uh, yeah, sure. Um, my name is Jason Todd, feel free to just call me Jason. Uh, what else?

Teacher: Maybe give us a fun fact about yourself?

Jason: Sure, sure. Uh I recently spent some time down under.

Teacher: Oh, in Australia?

Jason: Yeah, let's go with that.

Damian facepalms

-------

On the bus, kids screaming and throwing things at each other. Damian and Jason sit at the front near Damian's teacher. Jason has his eyes closed and looks tense.

Teacher: Uh, Mr. Todd? Jason? Are you alright?

Jason: Just peachy.

Damian: Pull it together Todd. You are embarrassing me.

Jason: Listen demon spawn, I'm trying to keep it together and not maim a rich brat. So why don't you shut up.

Damian: Tt. Everyone knows you are too cowardly to maim a child. However, I do admit that the loud and confined environment could cause stress... Here. Take these.

Damian hands Jason headphones. Jason looks confused.

Damian: Grayson claims that music can have a calming affect.

Jason: ...Thanks brat.

-------

Teacher: Ok class we are here! Remember to stick with your groups. Group one is with me. Group two is with Mrs. Smith. And group three is with Jason.

Kids break into groups, each group has seven kids.

Jason: Group three over here!

Damian rolls his eyes as the other six kids approach.

Jason: Be nice. Ok kiddos, we're starting at the uh American Rural Avant Garde exhibit. What the fuck is that crap?

Teacher: Oh my! Um, Mr. Todd. We do not encourage such strong language.

Jason: Wha- oh! You mean crap, so teach' that's my bad.

Teacher: Uh, no I uh-

Jason: Anyway c'mon demons let's go look at shitty art.

Teacher, chanting under their breath: The Wayne's donate a lot of money. The Wayne's donate a lot of money.

-------

In the cubism section.

Kid 1: Mr. Todd! When's lunch?

Jason: Call me Jason kid, and it's only ten? Lunch isn't until one.

Kid 2: But I'm hungry!

Kid 3: And this is boring!

Jason: It's not that bad, look at this thing! It's- oh shit is that a Picasso?

Kid 4: Uh, yeah?

Jason: Fuck that asshole, let's go get ice cream.

Damian: Todd! That is not in the schedule, we can not skip a section just because you dislike the artist!

Jason: See, that's were you're wrong baby bird. I'm in charge and I say that Picasso is an asshole and we're skipping his shit.

Damian: We are already in trouble with father, if we exhibit bad behavior he might force us to spend more time together.

Jason: Look kid, Bruce sent me here because he wants us to bond. The greatest form of bonding is breaking rules and skipping school. So, really, by skipping we're actually doing what he wants.

Damian: Tt. I suppose that sounds accurate.

-------

Jason: Time for lunch kiddos.

Kid 2: But we just finished our ice cream break?

Jason: No, we just finished the seeing the museums second floor. Right?

Kid 6: No we-

Jason: No no, we finished the second floor. The whole ice cream thing, that's our little secret. Right?

Kids: Ohhhhh

Jason: Now you're getting it!

-------

Damian glares at his lunch

Jason: What's wrong kiddo?

Damian: Tt. It appears that I might have, accidentally, taken Drake's lunch instead of my own.

Jason: And? What's the problem?

Damian: Drake, packed that abomination that he calls a sandwich.

Jason: Oh, god. He packed a peanut butter pepperoni sandwich again?

Damian, looking at the lunch with complete disgust: Yes.

Jason: Here, take my PB&J.

Damian: ...

Jason: Timbits taste in sandwich's is a crime against humanity. But I'm not vegan, so if worst comes to worst I'll eat it.

Damian: ...Thank you Todd. I- I did not think you cared about my dietary choices.

Jason: Just because we fight sometimes doesn't mean I won't have your back kid. Yeah, I guess being vegan is a choice, but it's a choice that I'll always support.

Damian quickly hugs Jason before taking his sandwich and pretending nothing happened.

Damian: I appreciate the support. Thank you, brother.

Jason: No problem baby bird.

-------

Jason: So, we have an hour before we have to get back on the bus. And, uh- oh shit! Ok, so apparently we had an assignment. Uh, the instructions say to draw your favorite work and write why you like it. What the fuck kind of bullshit assignment is that?

Jason: Uh, ok we're doing a speed draw. Everyone just pull up your favorite work on the museum website and try your best.

--> 40 Minutes Later <--

Jason: Ok, hand me your sheets and let's head to the bus.

Damian, hands his assignment in.

Jason: Whoa, huh.

Damian, looking nervous: What Todd?

Jason: Nothing, just this is a really good drawing kid.

Damian blushes: Of course it is.

Jason smiles and ruffles Damian's hair: Good job brat.

Damian smiles and heads to the bus

------

Both in the car, about to drive back to the manor.

Jason: You know, I actually sorta had fun today.

Damian: Your presence was... enjoyable.

Jason: We're never telling that to Bruce, right?

Damian: Obviously, if father thinks that his plan worked he will be completely insufferable.

Jason: Agreed. Y'know, sometimes field trips go long.

Damian: Oh?

Jason: Yeah, I mean, it wouldn't be too weird if we were an hour or so late getting home.

Damian: If we were to be late getting home, how would we spend that time?

Jason: There's a cool arcade that should be open right now.

Damian: I do not believe that I have ever been to an arcade.

Jason: Well, that needs to be fixed right now. You down baby bird?

Damian: I- uh I am down, is that the correct usage of the term?

Jason: Hell yeah.

---------------------------------------------------

Based on this headcanon.

[iguessthisisanewobsession]

I’m only talking about the first game bc it’s the one i’m familiar with and assuming this is a no capes au.

Bruce is obviously Joel

But thematically I think Ellie would be Tim.

Think about it, they were both kids who were thrusted upon the men who were traumatized and turned more violent and dark after their children died in their arms.

They slowly build a bond through time until they have a kinship close to a father and their child.

Bu this thought process Jason is Sarah, too young for the new world and killed before their time.

Dick I would place into uncle Tommy’s role. He would have already left for Bludhaven giving reason for him not to be with the family right away.

(Possibly making a U-turn when shit went down to make the timeline make sense?)

Also Dick is willing to put people down for fucking with his family already as seen by his reason of becoming robin and the clown beat down after Jason died. (Though we could also have Alfred shoot the guy with a shotgun but that would be messy.)

Selina as Tess makes sense as the other’s have pointed. The hot and cold maybe they be fucking vibes and the stealing and selling shit is in character for both. (Plus the Selina going out in an implied blaze of glory with her whip would be such a cool scene for her.)

And the only other person I would place would be Ra’s al Ghul as David the leader of the cannibals.

(though Slade would be a good alternative.)

Charismatic, leader of a skilled group of hunters of humans, becomes enamored with the idea of this competent teen, forces their hand to try to sway them into joining their side, attempts to murder them when it doesn’t go their way.

*cough* Tim would get to cut off Ra’s stupid head *cough cough*

Unfortunately, think Alfred would have to be dead in the main story or living with Dick because of his age.

And as for the others last of us characters I only got hints and vague ideas of Hal being Marlene bc I think he would be a good person to have the morally grey view of it’s the needs of the many verses the needs of the one when it comes to the cure. Military background would make him competent when it comes to running the fireflies but not so it is a perfect system. Bruce would also be willing to actually kill him.

Would Bruce still have his no killing ideals in this AU? Would he make exceptions for mercy killings like at the beginning of the game? Or would he have Selena do them for him? It would make the scenes where the human death happens more impactful.

Maybe he changes his code in the univerity of eastern colorado (or this au’s story’s plot parallel)

Or maybe it will be Saint Mary’s hospital?

Idk it’s 3am and I went feral over this idea for over an hour

Batfamily but it’s The Last of Us

[starshipsofstarlord]

Mummy Quinn - Harley Quinn x reader

Masterlist Link

Summary; whilst coming home from shopping, Harley returns with more than just food...

Warnings; kidnapping, Harley having (severe) baby fever, mention of death and murder, mentions of insanity and mental health, mentions of parental abuse, mentions of alcoholism, swearing, homelessness mention

divider by @firefly-graphics

“It’s okay Bruce, mummy will be home soon, she just went out to get us some jerked. Now this time, you’re not eating the whole bag, okay? I need to eat too, otherwise I will die, and well, I don’t want to end up like the rest of my family, okay? Good, I’m glad we’re on the same page buddy, if we weren’t then we’d have a problem.” You spoke the the giggling hyena, ruffling his ears, as the sound of the door opening made the animal lurch his head forward in hilarity, and you turn.

You expected various bags of junk food, but instead there was one small carrier containing such things, Harley also held a container of diapers and a baby, that was clinging onto her shoulder, as she multitasked with all the cargo that she was delivering to your shared flat. A furrow enclosed on your brow, as you focused on the child that she had brought home, it was practically tethered to her, grasping onto her extravagant clothing as though it never wanted to let your girlfriend go.

“Is that a baby?” You asked her, surprised by her tentativeness to it as she placed all else down, and bounced the oblivious infant in her arms. If it were able to comprehend its situation, it would surely be screaming that it was in a nut job’s arms (though you weren’t that much more sane than her), wailing out to be rescued from the mad woman’s hands.

Half the time, you didn’t think about Harley’s mental health, being around her was normal. But right now, you were worrying for it; you wondered why she had a baby, of all things! It’d make more sense if she returned home with a giraffe than a small human, even a dead body would be more comforting than the fact that she had an actual child in her arms.

“Obviously silly.” Harley replied, shrugging the puffs of her shirt up to the sides of her head as a toothy and stretched smile found port on her face. “I’m gonna call him Bruno, he looks like one, doesn’t he? Such a cute baby, aren’t you Bruno, and since we can’t have one of our own, neither can we go through the method of adopting because our reputations proceed us, we have this little guy.”

“Where’d you find him Harl?” You cooed, walking closer as Bruno, as she had claimed to dub him, reached his hand out towards you, his nimble and small fingers hardly managing to wrap around one of your own. It was true, being a criminal sucked. You weren’t able to adopt because laws and blah blah blah. So that was a great blockade in the way of ever having children with the woman that you loved.

“At the grocery store.” She answered, making you snap your eyes up to her, shocked by the revelation behind her words. “What? Don’t look at me like that, if you’d have seen him, you’d have taken him too. The parents weren’t even paying attention to him, instead they were buying vast bottles of whiskey. I know that life, and I lived it!”

“They’re his parents baby.” You tried to reason with her as she ruggedly shook her messy hair in vain, panicking. “You turned out fine, he’ll do the same, in his own way.” She bellowed a laugh out of you, as tears swamped her icy eyes, her nostrils flaring passively as she tried to keep it and herself all together.

“I’m fine. I’m fine?! Really sweets, we sure as hell know I’m anything but fine! Look at me, really look at me y/n, would you say I’m sane? Would you say that I have my head on straight? Exactly, my childhood bore into half of this, my alcoholic father constantly putting pressure on me to be the image of perfection and intellect, but that didn’t last. I was foolish, until I met J, because every one in my life were constantly trying to protect me, except him.”

“Harley.” You sighed, raking your hand through your hair as you watched how she protectively hugged the child to her chest. “People fuck kids up, yes, they do it all the fucking time, but this one isn’t ours to fuck up. He has parents, they brought him into this world, and it’s their responsibility to raise him.”

“Well, we could kill them.” She offered, as her face crinkled in disregard of what you were trying to say. “He could be ours, our baby. We’d give him a good life, he’d have everything he could ever want.”

“And it’d all be stolen except sandwiches from Sal’s.” You stated, huffing as you hated demeaning her wishes like this, but it was necessary. “You have to give him back Harley, he is not ours to keep.”

“But I bought him diapers and one of those rattly thingies.” She pouted, the red on her lips extenuating her expression. The majority of the time you crumbled when she did that, but you couldn’t, not now. The tone was too serious, and whilst you weren’t one hundred percent alike to those who were ‘sane’, it was clear that this wrong, and you didn’t want her to end up in Arkham again.

“Doesn’t matter, you stole them anyway, same as you did with him. Now suck it up, because we will not be keeping him, and you’re making Brucey feel unloved. He is our child, if you want, we can get another pet.” Bruce grunted in satisfaction of his presence being adjourned and noticed, swiping his tongue up the palm of your hand as an act of affection.

“Really?” She squealed, going to clap her hands together, but realising that she had the child in her arms. “Fine, I suppose you’re right.” Her head dropped as she turned towards the door, grabbing the bag of diapers and going to disappear out the entrance. You spoke her name, causing her to freeze.

“I love you, and I’m proud of you honey.” You told her, causing her to nod in relevance, and once she exited out the door, you heard crying, but it was not coming out from the infant. With a sigh, the background noise of them descending down the building rattling in your brain, you grasped your phone. “Can’t believe I’m doing this.” You grumbled, pressing your hand against your hip as you dialled a number on your phone.

“Hello, who is this?” The voice of a woman spoke through the phone, the caller ID clearly not being a concern of the person who had answered.

“Selena, it’s me y/n.” She greeted you in turn, as you waited for her to finish speaking. “So you’re street smart and all, do you think you can get me a rat off the streets? No, not an actual rat, a kid, sorry for my description, don’t claw my eyes out, of a night I see some pretty interesting things... anyways, I want to adopt and being a criminal and shit, that’s rather difficult...” Harley was going to love you, that was until she heard you change your mind on the pet ordeal.

A while later the door opened again, a snicker rolled around the room, but it was not from behind you in the tub, where Bruce was seated. No, Harley walked in with a white leash, and a hyena, of course. “This is Alfred, you said I could get a pet, so I got one.” Great, a new pet and now a kid, the one bedroom apartment was sure going to be crowded.