#because I see everyone likes those two for some reason

[generallemarc]

you care more about proving a woman wrong than you do about improving society. Typical.

Why yes, that is the worst possible way to interpret "it is neither my fault nor my responsibility that members of my demographic do bad things."

Why do you think it’s unreasonable for women to be afraid of the group who commits 90% of the violent crimes?

For the same reason you think it's unreasonable to be afraid of the race that commits the majority of those crimes. Oh, but when you use crime statistics to reinforce your bigotry it's ok, because your statistics are because the demographic you're talking about is just objectively evil.

“being in very real danger of rape and murder”

As a victim of rape, there are two possibilities here: either you are a fellow victim venting rage, or you're lucky enough to not be a victim and are trying to tell me that you understand rape better than I do, that you magically know that every man is Schrodinger's rapist in spite of all the data you were relying on for your bigotry a second ago showing conclusively that rape is usually by someone the victim knows, which I can personally attest to. So, which is it?

Fourth, here are some links about reverse sexism and why it’s ridiculous:

Oh, some articles from a bigot telling me her bigotry isn't akshually bigotry because I'm not oppressed enough for people to judge me by my demographic? Lady, there is no combination of words in the English language that could ever convince me that being a bigot, which is judging someone based on their demographic, which is what you are doing, is akshually ok for this or that contrived exemption. I hold everyone to the same standards, because unlike you I believe in equality and not the supremacy of one group over another.

women are pushed out of male dominated industries (it’s not that we think it’s too hard or too dangerous, it’s that it’s hard to break the glass ceiling.

Oh, so there's women lining up to take jobs in logging and mining? Women are being artificially held back from their dream jobs in being manual laborers on construction sites? Show me. Show me that, specifically. Show me women wanting to work in the bad jobs.

You’re wrong and nobody cares that your feelings are hurt.

Projection does not become you, my dear.

Because women might have the ability to hurt your feelings, but men COMMIT 90% OF THE FUCKING VIOLENT CRIMES. THESE TWO THINGS ARE NOT THE SAME

And there's the collectivism at the root of every dumbass ideology ever conceived. Because Group A members have done bad things to Group B members, it is ok and in fact morally good for individual members of Group B to act like shitheads to members of Group A. What you're doing can't possibly be bad, because children are starving in Afri-I mean, because other people have it worse so your problem doesn't ma-I mean, because men oppress women in all these first-world democracies with countless women holding more power in their little fingers than most men could ever dream of. You wanna see real, genuine gender-based oppression? Try the Middle East. They are, and I say this without a shred of irony, in desperate need of feminism, of the classical model that you and your kind abandoned that simply called for both sexes to be treated equally in all things. But you'd rather defend your own bad behavior than direct your attention towards advancing the cause of women who, unlike your privileged first-world ass, actually need it.

man hating will never be progressive. you can't take terf shit and slap a rainbow coat of paint on it and act like it's somehow now based and woke and pro queer rights. snap out of it.

[aninipanin1]

I think that Anri begs adult manager! reader to force Ego to eat an actual meal that isn’t those instant noodles

EW, VEGETABLES...?

Notes: I actually love this so much, anon lol

"Good morning, Anri-san. How may I help you today?"

You greeted your fellow female manager, figure hunched over the washing machine, scrubbing the white linen sheets from the many rooms around the facility, especially the one that legit had an oyster sauce spill, leaving a spot darkened.

Anri gave her a large smile, one that is familiar, at first before her, she reached some sort of 'Eureka' moment, and her smile turned into one of disappointment she did not think of it earlier along with a hint of mischief in it.

"Actually, can you help me with something, Y/n?"

"Oh, of course! What do I do?"

The redhaired manager motioned for her to come closer, to which she followed. Cupping her hand around your ear, Anri whispered the 'task' she wanted you to do.

As she spoke, the wider your eyes became. How will you even pull this off?

"But, Anri-san..! You know how much he loves his noodles...and how he doesn't really like me."

You always thought that Ego Jinpachi, the head and director of the Blue Lock facility, never seemed to like you. He wasn't rude to you (you think because he talked to you the way he did to everyone else), but you can definitely see that he would go out of his way to avoid talking to you, approaching you or anything related to talking with you alone without Anri, unless it was something prefessional and work-related.

He also always scolds you. You know, it was just because of the betterment of the project. But why did he have to scold you for just being around Noel Noa or any of the master strikers? They were the ones handling the improvement of the boys. Of course, you need to be around them! Well, it was one of the many things you noticed, but you digressed. After all, you know you cannot please everyone, especially in a workplace environment.

So, you were a little shocked when Anri tilted her head at you, confused about your claim.

"Ego-san...doesn't like you?"

"Um, isn't it obvious, Anri-san? He doesn't really like talking to me at all, and when you aren't there with us, he will always avoid talking to me even if I try to make casual conversations! Also, he always scolds me for the stupidest reasons! Why does he get mad when I talk to Noa-san, Snuffy-san, Prince-san, or even Lavinho-san, I will never understand! It's my job to make sure that the boys are doing well and I can only make sure of that through the master strikers!"

You did not know when you started ranting, but you did. Anri, who listened to you with open ears, could not help but chuckle on the inside. She felt quite amused and also disappointed at Ego. But, she cannot say she was not surprised. Ego was one, if not the most emotionally constipated person she had ever met. It was not a surprise that he would try to avoid you.

But, why did he have to do all those things? It wasn't helping his cause at all!

'You better thank me for what I am doing, Ego-san.'

"Ego-san! Um..."

You stood there in the office where the said man was watching the many screens, watching over the progress of the players who were all training in their own ways. In your hands was a tray filled with sautéed vegetables, a bowl of rice, and some chicken in a bowl you cooked just for the man.

Even if you think he hates you, you can not just ignore someone who is literally putting their life in danger because they don't want to eat healthy things. You aren't messed up like that!

But, you did not know how to approach this, much less him. How will you even ask him to do this, much less with the strained relationship you two had? This was a really bad idea! Why did Anri have to approach you of all people for this-

"What is it?"

He turned his swivel chair to face you, his eyes a bit lidded to show that he was not that happy for being interrupted.

"I made some extra food, and uh...I thought you may want to have it."

'That's so stupid, Y/n!'

He raised an eyebrow at this, and it did not help that the look on his face showed that he did not approve of eating the pallate on the tray.

"Y/n-chan, you know I don't eat those things."

"I know...! I just didn't want to waste it. Anri-san said she already ate so..."

Ego did not say anything, turning his swivel chair to face the screens again. Just as you were about to give up and leave the room thinking that he would not accept the food at all, he raised his arm and pointed to an empty space on the desk.

"Put it there. Don't blame me if I don't eat it and it becomes rotten."

Blinking at his words, you just nodded your head, a bit dazed that he actually considered even being near the food. You did as he told before bowing and leaving to do your other chores and duties.

Needless to say, when Anri entered Ego's office, she was shocked to see the man munching on a bowl of rice with chicken and vegetables on top. His eyes were still focused on the screen, back hunched in a weird position, but he was indeed eating.

"Did Y/n pass by here..?"

"She did. Dropped this...abomination and her paperwork."

Ego answered, pointing to the food that he called 'abomination,' yet he was still eating the food, cheeks round with food. Anri nodded, yet it was obvious she did not believe the disgusted look in his face to which he only glared at her for.

"You're the one who said it. The facility should not waste food." He pointed his chopstick at her.

"Yeah, yeah. It's totally not because you favour her, definitely not." Anri shrugged, a cheeky smile as she headed out the room once she dropped the paperwork.

'I'm surrounded by simps, haahh...' She inwardly sighed.

ADDITIONAL TIME!

Anri: You like her.

Ego: No, I don't.

Also Ego: *proceeds to hoard every single thing Y/n gave him, yes, even if it was the inkless pen she passed to him to throw in the trash.*

I'm sorry if this was too short, hahaha. I didn't really know how to go deeper into this. But I hope you loved this!

Blue Lock is WRITTEN by Kaneshiro Muneyuki and ILLUSTRATED by Nomura Yusuke. All credits to the both of them.

[ilikecrocssuckit]

BG3 Headcanons No One Asked For (ilikecrocssuckit edition)

Inspired by the wonderful series by @grenanigans

This episode: Each companion at the movie theater!

Astarion

Gets Hot Tamales candy or other cinnamon one just because it allows him to feel some semblance of warmth.

Pretends to like horror movies. Actually finds them deeply troubling and triggering but he'll be twice-damned if he shows that.

Chronic hater of every movie ever.

Gale

Rather disgusted by theater concessions. Still buys the biggest popcorn because he knows it's how they make money.

Seeks out the artiest and most pretentious films possible. Donates to the Baldur's Gate film festival and submits to it every year specifically to support such films.

Meticulously crafts his Letterboxd reviews after every screening.

Karlach

Wants to get a shushy but they always melt too fast so she never bothers anymore. Settles for popcorn, nachos, and 3 hot dogs.

Genuinely loves horror movies and finds Ghostface, Art the Clown, and Michael Myers attractive. Mostly though, she just loves being at the movies.

Cheers and laughs and generally reacts enthusiastically when the movie calls for it. She always cleans up after herself if she spills though.

Lae'zel

Rarely eats at the theater until she learns that they make money off of concessions, then follows Gale's lead because she finds the fact that they don't make money doing the thing they're designed for reprehensible.

Mostly just fascinated by the fact that movies exist and people put effort into creating them. Deeply interested in the filmmaking process and specifically looks for Blu-Rays with extensive behind the scenes features when she likes the movie. Treasures her Lord of the Rings Extended Editions for this reason.

Obsessively watches those "Expert Breaks Down Scenes From Movies and TV" videos because she wants to know where her favorite things succeed and fail so she can write letters to those responsible in the crew.

Shadowheart

Loves the Good & Plentys or other licorice candies. Doesn't like popcorn. Gets an obnoxiously large drink though and almost always beelines for the bathroom after the movie's over or sometimes during. Relies on Lae'zel to fill her in afterwards because Lae'zel won't speak during the movie itself. This has caused her to be confused about major plot points on multiple occasions.

Loves the horror movies that even make Karlach squirm. The really extreme horror ones that get like a one or two night release or get shown at the grindhouse that Orin frequents. Also has a soft spot for family dramas and romantic comedies but she'll never suggest them as something to go see.

Genuinely fails to see the point of theaters in the age of streaming [Editor's note: Yes, I do hate this about her.] Still goes because it makes Lae'zel happy.

Wyll

Buys a big slushie and puts it in Karlach’s cup holder. Gets a modest popcorn for himself.

Doesn't particularly have a lot of preference for what they watch. Usually just lets it all soak in. Has a penchant for swashbuckler epics though, and secretly keeps his eye out for rereleases of some of the classics. Sad there are hardly any made anymore.

Has the theater membership so everyone else can get cheaper tickets. Is happy to help his friends be more social and get out of the house.

Bonus

Halsin

Has a kink about sex in the back of the theater. Rarely gets to indulge. Sometimes goes to whatever the biggest R-rated bomb of the weekend is with his date so he can do so.

Jaheira

Exclusively sees children's and family movies with her wards and Minsc. Too busy otherwise. Maintains an encyclopedic knowledge of them regardless.

Made the mistake of thinking animation=kid-friendly only once.

Minsc

Only goes when Boo is excited for a movie or when asked by one of Jaheira's wards.

Boo loves to watch space sci-fi to laugh at the inaccurate aliens. Still appreciates practical effects of them though. Minsc just enjoys explosions and cool spaceships.

Wishes someone would make a movie about him. He would absolutely be banned from the set for being too nitpicky.

[foone]

I need to watch more Star Trek: The Original Series. Despite, you know, everything about me, I've only actually seen like a third of it. I never was a big fan as a kid and I never went back to watch it.

The slightly embarrassing reason why I need to watch it is that I've been developing this headcanon about Bones where he's got a complex and somewhat destructive relationship with death and I honestly don't know if it's backed up by canon and I don't want to keep talking about it (in the same ways, at least) if it's not really canon-compatible.

So I wanna re-watch/watch TOS just so I can see if my Bones characterization makes any sense or if it's solidly an alternate take on the character, like "what if bones was a depressed perfectionist with substance abuse issues?"

Like, I know he's often the smilies and jokiest of the crew, but that always read as, like... "clown happiness", for lack of a better term. It's smiling and joking as an act, because you don't want to look and sound as miserable as you are.

I think McCoy is a man who wants to save everyone and despite the wonders of his future technology, he knows he can't win. No matter how many miracles he pulls off, it's just a matter of time before they come back from a mission with something he can't fix, and they die on his medibed or in his arms on a mission. This is, of course, not helped by his two closest friends being Kirk and Spock, who are always willing to die to save each other, the crew, the mission, strangers, alien rocks with laser eyes, the concept of hatred itself, whatever.

He's "happy" and "jokey" but in a M*A*S*H sense: you're saving lives but sometimes it hits a little too hard that you're saving soldiers who are just going to go back out there and get shot or blown up or whatever damn foolish way. And he drinks a lot more than he should to not have to face those facts sober. And to forget, even if only for a moment, all the faces of those he failed to save.

Spocks got an eidetic memory from his green-blooded heritage, but Bones doesn't need one to be sure he remembers that young ensign who was grabbed by a plasma macrobe and had all his red blood cells turned to dust. There's one of those every day, it seems. Different reasons, different situations, different faces dying in front of him and he never stops feeling like a failure when it happens. But he goes on, because if he gives up that'll just mean more deaths and pain and sickness.

He knows he's gonna lose this war in the end. But that's no reason to stop fighting. He drags himself to the sickbay every morning, happy and chipper, because if he doesn't do this he can't live with himself, and you've he's got to put on a good show for the patients, nurses, officers. They're counting on him, and they need his wholesome bedside manner.

But you can see it when he gets angry. How pissed he gets when people die for no reason, are sick for no reason, are denied treatment for no reason, and how much he hates all this space malarkey. His anger sounds like a man who has been hurting for a very long time and is finally letting some of it out.

[heartbreakgrill]

Delicate: Vessel (Sleep Token); Part 9; "Never seen that color blue."

“No, yeah, of course! Noo…no! Thank you! I seriously appreciate all of your help and understanding during this! I hope you have a wonderful day! Yeah, aw, thanks! You, too! Yeah- okay- bye!”

My faux smile dropped as soon as my hand did, phone falling to a silenced settle on my left thigh. I breathed a shallow breath of somehow anxious relief, so ironic that it made me want to scream.

Max reached across the bed and rubbed my knee comfortingly, “You okay?”

I wanted to snort, yell, kick my feet, and laugh hysterically. Throw a temper tantrum, wish on a star, kiss a fucking frog. Fall on my knees, beg the skies. Change fate's cruel course of time.

But my expression was blank as I shrugged, “What can ya do?”

The corner of his lips lifted into the saddest smile. His thumb brushed my skin, “It’s gonna be alright. Once you settle back in, things will start to feel normal. You can start…moving on. And, hey, I’m visiting in just a month. You have that to look forward to. School starting, your new role at the clinic. So many good things, Daz.”

He was right- I had so much to be excited about. I really should’ve felt excited, grateful. A better woman would have. A better woman would have seen the blessings all around her and felt so full of life and love. God, she would’ve respected herself enough to not be in this situation in the first place.

Yet I couldn’t help but feel resentful, knowing that I would trade all of it for-

for him.

For Oliver.

I would give up everything for just another moment, hanging onto his lips like a vine. Just a second of growth, even if being ripped away meant digging up the roots and my leaves dying.

I just gave Max that fake smile, knowing full well he was aware that it meant nothing. “You’re right. It’ll be good for me to be home.”

He squeezed my knee before removing his hand. “You wanna finish packing? Or maybe take a break? Get some food?”

I glanced around at the mess of clothes across Sam and I’s hotel room. My bags lay open, a few piles of my stuff already stuffed inside. But there was more than half to be done. So much to be done before I went…before I went home tomorrow.

Tomorrow. Less than 12 hours from now. I’d be heading back to reality. Closing the doors on Europe, on everything and everybody I’d be leaving here.

There was just one week left on the European leg of the two. Tomorrow morning, everyone will be leaving for Germany. I’d go to the airport with them, like normal, but depart at a separate gate, at the same exact time. Those who needed to know, well, I was going to tell them. And those who needed to know the reason why would, too. Sam was going to think I was going home because of an offer for a higher position from the clinic I worked at. But this was only partially true. Training for that wouldn’t even start for another 3 weeks. School wasn’t for a month.

I was leaving for me- for clarity, fresh air. Oliver was right- London was foggy, full of pollution and shitty, selfish men.

I needed to get away, out. Back to routine and home. Back to what I knew- what wouldn’t hurt me.

I looked back to Max, “I'm gonna finish packing. Get it over with. Before Sam gets back. I think it might hurt his feelings to walk in and see this…mess.”

Mess might have held a double meaning. I had looked better, for sure. Max understood, I think, for he knocked his shoulder against mine, then stood from the bed. “We got it, Daz.”

I stood up quickly, knowing the only way to get started was to just start. Stand. Move. (I wanted to crawl into a hole and die.)

It took us another hour or so to finish stuffing my belongings into their bags. I had bought maybe one too many souvenirs, so we struggled to find a place for everything. When we were done, I slew myself across the end of the bed, breathing heavily, sweating a little bit.

Max groaned from the floor, “Why do you own so many things?!”

“Dude, I don’t even know. It’s gonna take me 12 years to unpack!”

He chortled, half-heartedly, patting his stomach as an afterthought. “I am soooo hungry. What do you wanna eat?”

I sat up as he did so, shrugging a bit, “You pick. I don’t have the energy for all that.”

“I’m good with the hotel restaurant if you are.”

“Fuck it.”

So, we sludged our way downstairs. I hadn’t been leaving my room much, worried you-know-who would cross my path and shake things up again. Though, I doubted he was looking for me. He hadn’t so much as texted me since last week. Oliver was probably sulking, convincing himself that he was the victim in this whole thing. The thought made my blood rush a little bit. I clenched my fist as the elevator doors closed, trying to focus on breathing and not screaming.

The past three had been probably one of the worst of my life. I was so…so sad. So angry. Confused. Nothing made sense, yet all of my fears had come true. It was like I knew all the answers, but my bones felt so put off by how they manifested themselves. Like, what do you mean the cold, dark, distant boy turned out to be a cheating, manipulative liar? Right on the money.

My rational mind couldn’t wrap around the fact that it still felt so…disappointing? Wrong? Fucked the fucking fuck up.

The doors slid open. I followed, quietly, behind Max as we headed for the inlet to the left of the front counter. This was a usual part of my new found routine, grabbing food with Max. Albeit, sneakily, with numerous texts between the two of us (me, badgering him) ensuring nobody else (Oliver) was down here. In avoiding him, I had been avoiding everybody else, too.

I could already see their knowing looks. Sam could read me like a book. Ronnie was way psychic and usually felt the vibe of a situation long before it occurred. Adam, obviously, already was aware. And I'm sure he would have relayed the information to Cyrus.

I was exuding this aura of heartbroken, school-girl-fantasy-crushed, sad-puppy shit. I felt tired, and I’m sure my eyes looked it, too. Any passerby probably could have read my emotions pretty well. No matter, I’d be out of here soon. Back home. I could heal, rest, relax, find somebody else to fuck and get the fuck over this dumb ass white boy.

My dumb ass white boy. I’d tried not to think about him, so deeply sunk into this angry feeling that I couldn’t even fathom the idea of missing what had hurt me. Alas, every once and a while (between every other curse I thought of) something would flash through my mind. A distant memory, an image of his deep-ocean blue eyes shining with flames from the rooftop firepit, triggered by a breath, a catch of the wind, a sink in my heart. I’d feel a little moth flicker in my chest. An air bubble, taut in my stomach, would have me hiccuping from gushing tears in an instant.

I think it was the deep blue suede of the hotel bar’s stools that did it this time. I brushed a hand, slowly, watching the color shift from the movement of the fabric. The lighter color reminded me of a time he felt the way I did right now. Sadness. Maybe it hadn’t meant as much to him, maybe his depravity was not comforted by me. But that moment, when I held him, when he nuzzled his head into my neck and began crying-

“Wanna drink?” Max rested a hand on my shoulder, drawing my attention back from where I was trudging through fleeting, erasing moments.

I ceased my body from flinching, willed away the wetness in my eyes, and nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, let’s get a drink.”

Which was a mistake.

One drink turned to appetizers turned to three drinks turned to main courses, 5 drinks, 2 shots, and dessert. Before I knew it, Max and I were cackling over some typo on some Twitter post. I gripped his shirt sleeve and hoped I wouldn’t slide off the bar stool. For the first time in a week, I wasn’t concerning myself with the logistics of sticking around in this public area as long as we had been. I wasn’t even thinking of Oliver. In fact, Max and I were discussing some of our favorite shitposts about American politics. My mind was far away from dumb Brits and idiotic Europeans.

Of course, the world had a very funny way of spitting in my face.

Adam, Cyrus, and- low and behold- Oliver came strolling into the bar right when Max and I finished ordering another drink. I felt a little sick, watching as they neared us. Oliver wasn’t paying attention. He never did. His head, sunken into his hoodie, hands shoved in his pockets. He moved like the Grim Reaper. I wondered if he had come to take my soul away.

Adam and Cyrus seemed…on edge. They noticed Max and I only after they’d made it halfway across the room. Adam hesitated on his next step, catching my eye, worriedly glancing between me and Oliver.

Max was aware, at this point. He cut himself off mid sentence, swiping a hand across his lips. “Shit,” he mumbled to himself. “Daisy…let’s go.”

His fingers brushed through mine in a desperate grasp to pull me along with him, towards the door. I was drunk. I was not thinking. I was hysterical, sad, heartbroken, angry. I tugged my hand away, instead flipping into the air to wave and cheerfully catch the group’s full attention.

“Cy! Adam!” I couldn’t quite catch his name on my tongue. I thought I might puke. “Hey, girl!”

Oliver looked up at the sound of voice. He stopped, but three feet from our little round table. The light, dim from the overhead lamps and LED strips behind the counter, caught the round pupils in his eyes. I watched as he blinked once, twice. Blue.

“Oliver!” There it was.

He met my eye. The corners of his lids wilted, like the petals of a flower, aged, saddened. Drops of rain dropping them in weight. Max looked between the two of us. Cyrus busied himself with buying a drink. Adam slouched in the awkward, pregnant air. Oliver ignored me, moved around our group to sit as far away as possible.

I clenched my jaw. Rage. Utter, pure anger. How dare he deny me even now? The fact that he had not come to my door in the past few days, on his knees, begging for my forgiveness- I was seething. And, now, he goes back to his old tricks. Pretending like I don’t exist.

I turned to Max, who was bracing for impact. His hands were wary, held up near me as if to catch my fall. I shrugged, smiled cheekily, wrinkled my nose. I bumped Adam’s shoulder with mine and declared, “Shots on me?”

He continued his smug slump in the bar stool for the next hour. Adam, Cyrus, Max, and I hung like the old pals we were, cracking jokes, swapping stories like we were surrounding a campfire. I glanced at Oliver every once in a while, hoping to accidentally make eye contact like we used to. He stared down at his phone or his glass. I was surprised the device worked considering he’d fucking forgotten my contact existed or something.

Ugh.

What a fucking ass hole.

Adam asked me a question, pulling my attention back in. “Are you excited for Germany?”

Oh. I’d almost forgotten all about this little plot. I knew that if I spoke loud enough, Oliver would hear. He’d react. I could almost hear it, the little hitch in his breath. The tickle in his throat. The flit of his tongue across his lips, the patter of his holey heart.

I felt my own chest jitter with the excitement, the want of a reaction I needed from him. The shock. The idea that I would be an ocean away from him. No longer at an arm’s length.

I turned towards Adam and rested my chin on my fist. I frowned, almost playfully, “Ugh, I hate having to tell you guys like this!”

Cyrus slowly lowered his glass from his lips, having been mid-drink, “What’s up?”

“I’m going home,” my brows furrowed in a naive look. Adam and Cyrus’ chins dropped a sliver. I pouted my lip, “Stop! I know! I’m so sad!”

I wanted to wait until the conversation was over to look down the bar, to see if even a fragment of what I was saying had affected him. But, I didn’t need to wait. Oliver had flinched. He literally flinched.

“Yeah, me, too,” Adam touched my hand. “Why so soon? I thought you were staying through August?”

“I was planning on it, but…they offered me a better position at the clinic I work at. I have to get home to start training,” I continued, a satisfied smirk teasing my mouth.

Cyrus lifted his glass, “Well, there’s nothing to be sad about, then! To your new job.”

“I’ll cheers to that,” the smirk slipped into a genuine smile. I really would miss these guys, but my drunken, stupid mind wasn’t thinking about that. I wanted more from Oliver. I wanted a white flag or a look or a…fuck, I wanted him.

I pushed, “I’ll really miss you guys. Max, with your corny-ass pick-up lines, Adam’s mom vibes, Cy’s ability to knock back more drinks than fucking- I don’t know, Spider-man, and not get drunk? Shit’s insane.”

I drank in the laughter for a moment, eyes lingering down the bar to Oliver. Then, I added a name to my list and narrowed my gaze, “Oliver,” he wouldn’t look. “With your need to ignore me in every room we’re in. I’ll really miss your cold fucking shoulder.”

Any laughter that may have hung onto our past moment faded. I heard Max take a sharp breath in through his teeth. Adam pressed his lips together. Cyrus looked over his shoulder at their friend. I didn’t know if he really knew, but he had to understand just a little bit. The vibes were always there. We thought we were sneaky, but we were so sickly up each other’s asses. We’d even run into Cyrus and Adam in the hallway that one time. I guess we were all really good at being hopefully fucking stupid and blind.

I leaned on my palm and stared that man down. I watched as he kept his chin, pointed ahead, like he was playing brave in the situation. His Adam's apple bobbed. Oliver clutched his glass, swung it back, slugged the liquid down. Slammed it back on the counter. Then, he stood up, pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and threw a wad of bills onto the bar. He adjusted his hoodie and left.

I was dizzy. I stuttered back a step. Max touched my wrist, murmuring something or the other about heading back upstairs. Telling me I was too drunk.

I felt slow, felt dizzy, felt scared, felt angry, felt sad. I felt so sad. I felt so angry and so sad and…

And, my eyebrows furrowed in anger, the shock erasing itself from my frame. I took a deep, drunken breath and followed his trail. Fast. Legs pumping, arms swinging at my sides.

He was at the elevator, looking down at his shoes. I couldn’t get his name out. I think if I did the tears were going to fall out, The sobs were going to ricochet through my whole body and knock me over and kill me and I’d die and I’d never get to see that dumb asses blue eyes any more. Ever again. I wanted to see his blue eyes again. I wanted him to look at me and see me for what he sees me as. I wanted him to touch my hip and wring my neck and tell me I was the only one he wanted. I’d take it. One more time, then he could go back to her. I just wanted a goodbye.

He was stepping into the elevator. The doors were closing. I jammed a hand between and he flinched, again.

I stepped in just as the doors began to shut again. His eyes were wider than I’d ever seen them. He was frozen. Frowning. He looked…sad.

I almost reached a hand out, almost caressed his cheek and pulled him into me. But, I didn’t. Instead, I said (yelled?), “What the fuck is your problem?”

He stammered, “Wha-what?”

I struggled to repeat myself. I needed to cry. It was going to open. But, for another moment, the anger took over, “You fucking heard me. What is your problem, Oliver? What the fuck did I do to deserve this kind of shit? I don’t wanna hear more sad excuses about your fucking mental health and your-your fucking anxiety. God, I- I fucking…I don’t even k- you fucking ignored me back there! I looked right at you and I said your name and I smiled at you and…I’ve been so nice to you. I’ve been nice to you all summer and you treat me like a piece of fucking shit. God, I’ve…I’ve told you so much. I told you about my mom and…and you laid there and you told me all this bullshit about how much you liked me! And then you…youre a fucking-”

I cut myself off, out of breath. I was sweating a little bit. I think I had spit a few times. And I paced the elevator so much that I was flush against the wall. I leaned my shoulders back against the cool metal, wringing my hands, tugging at my hair.

He didn’t say anything. I breathed, hard, I thought, long. I kept thinking, and I kept getting angrier. I turned back to him, rearing up again. I had more to say, I just, I just needed to get some more concise- more thoughtful thoughts, right, exactly. Yes. I can…

“And who the fuck is F-”

“Daisy.”

There it was, my name. It was my name, soft and angelic, and holy. And a moment on his lips that he carved out of time and held a space for, for me to hear.

I stopped. I felt nothing for a moment. I looked at him and he was already waiting to see my eyes. My bottom lip wobbled.

“You’re obviously upset. And, drunk. Why don’t we talk about this in the morning? We can both get some rest.” He was always so good at two very distinct things: pushing stuff (people) aside and speaking to me in a way that felt like a cloud was wrapping itself around me. Like the cloud wanted me to lay in its arm and would coo me to sleep. Like I was safe and loved and-

Loved.

He made me feel loved.

I straightened up a bit at the thought. I pointed an accusatory finger at him, “Who the fuck is Fiona? What the fuck was that all about? Oliver, I’m not going to stand here and beg for you to love me. Or beg for you to come back to me. I just want a goddamn apology. For wasting my time, for playing with my fucking heart. For stringing me along. You knew-”

The tears came. Perfect timing. “You fucking know that I love you. You have known for a very long time. And you are an idiotic fool if you still don’t believe it. But I am not going to play this game with you. I told you that already and now I seriously mean it. I broke my back this summer to make sure that I was who you wanted me to be. So I was cool and chill and could take as much space as you wanted me to. I went with everything you asked of me, I was there when you needed a warm body. I comforted you and…and tried to fucking fix you like I knew you wanted me to. But, I am done. I am done with this. I am done-”

My voice cracked. I swiped an angry, shaking hand across my face. Vision blurred. “I am done with you. This is ridiculous. I don’t know if you meant to, but you have manipulated this situation so that you have been the one benefiting. I’m tired of letting you think you’re some broken, sad puppy dog on the side of the road that needs to be taken care of. Grow the fuck up. And, now I find out that there’s some other woman? That I- I’m the other woman, maybe? That you’re cheating on her with me? That I’m your fucking slut? Side hoe?”

I had paced again, this time, towards him. He was taller than me, but my anger was making me taller. He was almost…cowering. I pointed my finger again, nearly chest to chest with him.

“Fuck you, Oliver. Fuck you and fuck London and fuck your stupid fucking music.”

The doors opened, on our floor. I walked out, but turned to face him before he was really gone from me. I wanted to see his eyes one last time.

He was crying. I popped an arm into the door again, buying myself more time to kick him while he was down. I thought this would bring me closure. I thought I’d feel better if he knew, truly knew, the entirety. Every thought. Every hurt I felt.

“You asked me at the beginning of the summer what I was searching for. I thought that it was you. And I thought that I had found you.”

I shook my head sadly. The doorbell on the elevator rang. I stepped back, “I was right. There is no deeper meaning. Goodbye, Oliver.”

I stood there for a second, as though I could still see his blue eyes, boring through the metal doors.

Then, I sludged my way to my hotel room. I opened the door, shoulders slumped, body aching. I knew my makeup was smeared all over my face. My hair was wrecked. I couldn’t stop sniffling or whimpering. I walked into the room.

Sam sat up in his bed. Ronnie was beside him. I barely made it two more steps before Sam caught me in his arms.

–

The sky was gray. The weather in Europe usually was, especially up here on this side of the continent. I wasn’t surprised when, on our drive to the airport, it started spitting rain. I shivered underneath the cover of my hoodie, yet walked slowly through the entrance.

I remember when I had first dropped down in London, wide-eyed, hopeful. I think it had been raining then, too. But, I hadn’t cared. Come to think of it, it was raining pretty much everyday we had been in London.

Oliver was right about a couple things.

Back then, just three months ago, I hadn’t cared about the sun’s shadow curving from behind the clouds, nor did I mind that it was usually quite chilly outside. Now, I felt anger, annoyance at the weather, at the people, at the world.

At him. The stupid weight of my suitcase. The drag in my step. The wetness of my clothes and the chill of the wind.

I felt older, in the worst way. I was a different age, considering my birthday had passed while I’d been here. But, I felt old in a way that was draining. I felt like I had wasted so much time, energy, and all I had left were weary bones and sadness. Just how much I had left, I didn’t know. But I did know that as soon as I got back home, I would be rotting in my bed for a day or two.

Sam, Max, and Ronnie came to the airport early with me. My flight time had been pulled forward by an hour, so I needed to get here sooner than I thought. I wasn’t complaining, though. I couldn’t wait to get the fuck out of the hotel. Out of here. Out of London.

I hurried the process of packing my last few things. Stuffed my breakfast down my throat. Impatiently waited in the taxi, knee bouncing, as Sam and Max loaded the trunk with all of our things. Ronnie slid in beside me and became the first reason that I cried that day.

She reared a look over her shoulder, out the back window, to check on Max and Sam. Then, with an awkward sigh, she turned her knees towards me, “Peaches?”

I glanced up from my lap and the bounce of my knee slowed, “Yeah?”

Upon noticing the somber gaze in her eyes, my brows furrowed. “What’s up?” I added, fully presenting her my full attention.

Ronnie rubbed her nose in a seemingly nervous manner, “I just wanted to say…um, ew. Sorry.”

I softly giggled at her disgust with whatever sentence she was trying to form. “What is it?”

She finally met my eye in a fervently forward manner, “I usually have fun on tour. But this summer was…it was extra special. Getting to know you has been…so cool. I don’t know. I just…I love you, Daisy. You’ve become like a sister to me.”

I couldn’t help but feel the tears well up in my eyes. “Oh, Ronnie,” I sniffled, hugging her around the shoulders.

She pulled me close to her and I swear I heard her sniffle a bit, too. “I’m sorry for not noticing what was happening. I should’ve been there for you more. I got caught up in my own-”

“Don’t even apologize,” I reared back with my reply, “No. It’s nobody’s fault. I’m not even blaming myself for what happened. It was a stupid, weird situation. It was my responsibility to come to you if I needed help. I just needed…I just need to go home now.”

Ronnie smiled a sad, peaceful smile. “I hope I get to see you again soon. I don’t know what I will do without your bright light.”

“Oh, you will. You guys will be in the US soon. Sam said he was gonna drop by. I am positive you’ll be there, too,” I dropped a sly wink.

Ronnie watched my face for a moment, “I mean, of course you know now. But…” she narrowed her eyes, grinning in shocked realisation, “Fucker. You knew the whole time?!”

“Of course I knew the whole time. Sam is-” I snorted, “Sam is not hiding his lovesick, puppy-dog eyes.”

Ronnie’s gaze widened slightly, “I-”

The doors of the taxi popped open as the boys joined us, Max in the back on my other side, Sam in the front. He saw our laughing, secretive expressions in the rearview mirror and turned back. “What are you two doing?”

I brushed my hands across my cheeks to clear whatever tears might’ve been rolling still, then shook my head. “Nothing, Sam-Ham.”

He turned his eyes to Ronnie and tilted his chin forward. She shrugged, a smug smile contorting her once saddened face. Ronnie dropped a wink, “Nothing at all.”

The second person to make me cry was Max. Out of everyone, he was probably my best friend at this point. We had spent so much time together, out drinking, dancing, holed up in my hotel room with trays of room service, movies on the tv. He had been there through one of the most terrifying, exhilarating, strange summers of my life. We were bonded forever, now. I could feel it.

He was helping me check in while Sam and Ronnie headed to drop off our baggage. They were all just planning on hanging for the extra hour until it was time to check in for their flight. I was grateful they all wanted to sacrifice the time for me. To them, though, I knew it was second nature.

Some people made it easy, loving me.

I shook away the thoughts because the attendant was handing me my ticket. She reiterated boarding time, twenty minutes from now, and wished me a safe flight. “Thank you,” I nodded before turning back to Max.

The tall blonde was watching me. I could tell he was on the verge of tears from just the way that his shoulders shrugged forward. It made my heart swell, knowing how much of an impact I had had on them.

He tried to straighten up as I looked him in the eye. Then, he opened his mouth to say something. I threw myself into his arms before he could. Hugging me tight, Max brushed a hand down the back of my head.

“Oh, sweet, lovely angel. I am going to miss you so.”

I didn’t need to hear anything else to start crying into his chest. Max felt the rock of my shoulders and sniffled into my hairline. “Don’t start, love. I won’t be able to stop, myself,” he chuckled shortly.

We stood like that for a few minutes, maybe more, before I stepped back. I rubbed my eyes on the inside of my sweatshirt, knowing my face was flushed and probably swelling. Max touched his fingers to my wrists and gently brushed aside my hands. He took in my visage, so delicately, and sighed. “Can I just say…”

“Oh, no!” I exclaimed through a sob. More tears fell.

Max rubbed my shoulders, “No, no, no, love. It’s okay. No more tears, okay? We’ll be okay. Just…I just want- I need to tell you how important you are. I know you’re going to go home and things are going to start to settle and you’re going to start to think so many things about yourself. You are so easy to love, Daisy. It is like breathing to me, to Ronnie, to Sam, Sasha. It is breathing. And you are worthy of it, too. That’s all. I just…I just needed to tell you, okay?”

I didn’t say anything else. I just whimpered and pulled him in closer to me.

Sam was the worst.

Since the evening before, when I had broken down in his arms and told him, through my blubbering, a short synopsis of what had happened, we hadn’t spoken much. I didn’t know if it was simply because we didn't have enough time. But, I was feeling worse because of it.

I needed my big brother more than anybody else. Sam knew me better than anybody else, even if we hadn’t been around each other as often as we used to. He still understood me. We shared the same blood, for God’s sake.

Yet, as we sat there, in the waiting area of my plane’s gate, he didn’t even look at me. He stared down at the floor, hands folded in his lap. He sat across from Ronnie, Max, and I, making it known that he wanted nothing to do with the conversation. When he first sat there, the aisle a wide gap between us, I furrowed my brows. But, then, Ronnie and Max striked up some topic that I invested myself and my attention into.

It didn’t seem like that big of a deal until they called for me. I stood up, faster than I should’ve, to be honest, and began to gather my things. Phone, bag, jacket, passport. I ran the list over in my head, three times over.

All the while, Sam slowly stood, stuffed his hands in his pockets, and watched his feet as he scuffed his sneakers across the carpeted floor.

I passed my eyes over him for a moment, holding my breath. Surely, my brother would have something to say to me.

He didn’t make a move.

I began walking the short distance to my gate. Before I moved to get in line, though, I turned back to my friends. Max jumped for a hug first, barely allowing me enough time to fully settle back on my heels. I dug my feet into the ground to gain traction as his ginormous body came toppling into my arms. Ronnie joined in the hug yet struggled to toss her arms over Max’s tall frame. He adjusted as we all shared a laugh and tucked her in beside me.

He called over his shoulder, voice muffled, “Get in here, Sam-Ham!”

I heard my brother elicit a laugh. It felt refreshing to hear. Then, I felt the hug grow tighter as he joined in on Max’s other side. We didn’t stay like that for long. It was stuffy and I wasn’t getting much air.

So, I tapped Max’s back and said, “Alright. Let me go.”

I gave individual hugs to everybody, voicing my own grateful, somewhat short, goodbyes.

Then, I turned to my brother. He evaded my eye contact for a moment or two. Then he pulled me in. Tight.

Out of nowhere, “I’m sorry if he ruined your summer.”

Tensing up from the words, the mention of him, I slowly pulled back from Sam’s embrace. He held onto my back, sort of cradling me. The guilt lying in his eyes was far worse than anything I’d ever seen flash across his face. My own gaze softened from the taut expression it had anxiously contorted to.

“What?” I breathily inquired, unsure if I had heard him correctly, saddened that he was obviously carrying so much hurt from my stupid mistakes. “Why? Sam, it wasn’t your fault.”

“I know, Daz, I just…” Sam’s arms fell from around me. I missed the warmth as soon as the chill of the vast room settled in around my sweatshirt. He ran a veiny hand across his forehead, “I'm supposed to be there for you. Protect you. And I already suck at the first part.”

“Sam,” I grasped his wrist, slipping his fingers between my hands. “It’s not your fault. It’s…honestly, if my summer was ruined, it was because of my own shitty decisions. Besides, you don’t suck at being there for me. I can’t believe you would even think that!”

I clasped his hand tight between mine, brows furrowed. To hear him blame himself, to hear him look this way…This whole summer, I had spent my time obsessing over somebody who didn’t even want me. I should have paid more attention to my brother, who was part of the reason I was here in the first place.

The farther I got from the start of this journey, literally and figuratively, the blurrier my original dreams became. There was no meaning to find here- only what was already there.

The thought made me lick my lips in nervous realisation.

Sam let out a frustrated, breathy chortle. “Don’t give me so much credit. I’ve been…gone. Running away from home. For so long. Worried about getting out of that apartment and town and away from…from anything that could remind me of her. Remind me of mom. I left you behind in the process.”

The wetness in my eyes began to pour over. “Oh, Sam,” my lips trembled out as I dove back into his arms. I dug my fingers into his shoulders, holding onto him as though an airplane would dive down and pull him away. I needed this. This kind of hug. This moment.

Clarity was nearer than ever before.

“Listen,” I pulled back, “I need you to understand, okay? My summer was not ruined. It wasn’t. This entire experience has been the most amazing, wonderful, awesome, cool time. I got to spend so much time getting to see you, getting to see your world. And, don’t ever blame yourself for getting away. You had to. I see it now- You had to come be a part of this wonderful band, go with them on all of their amazing tours. I see it on your face, Sam. This is what you’re supposed to do, okay? My mistakes are my own. Not yours.”

“I just…” Sam stared at the floor for a moment, tongue quick to go and defend his original claim But he paused and let the information process. “I…I just wish I could punch him in the face or something. What a douche. Dragging you into his mess. I should’ve known, too. The way he treated you- it was so obvious. For that, I am sorry, Daisy. I should’ve said something. Honestly,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair, “I should beat his ass.”

Max and Ronnie, who had been trying to make it appear as though they were not eavesdropping, laughed at the last line. I opened up Sam and I’s moment by taking a step back. I gave them space to join us here. Ronnie clasped Sam’s hand and rested her head on his shoulder, “As funny as that would be, he is still your boss. And your bandmate,” she nodded to Max.

The tall blond rolled his eyes with a scoff, “Don’t worry. I’ll try to keep it civil.”

It was my turn to scold. I punched Max in the shoulder to gain his eye contact, “Don’t try. Just do it. He’s not a bad person. He just…sucks. A little bit.”

Talking about him, living in the truth of the situation, confronting all the dark realizations- it was a heavy weight to bear. I felt my shoulder slinking forward, as though I were Atlas with the dark, cloudy sky above me. Though I didn’t want to be rid of these three, I needed to be gone already. I needed to go before it all came crashing down again. I didn’t want anybody else to see me cry again. It was…embarrassing, to say the least.

So, I allowed one last hug from each of them and then turned towards my gate. I boarded the plane, mindlessly, going through all of the motions. Like I was used to leaving, like I was good at it. Like I was strong. But, I felt weak. I felt heavy and sad and angry and…

The city was gray. I remember it being sunny, summer-weather, though there had been a chill in the air. He always said it was. Maybe it always had been and I was…crazy. Wide-eyed. Desperate or naive or whatever.

But it was clear as day now, how dreary it looked from this airplane window. The wind whipped at the airline workers, shuffling luggage to their places, green vests billowing up. My breath fogged at the window which narrowed my pointed gaze. It seemed the plane was being pumped full of heat. I hadn’t realized it was that cold outside.

I guess fall was coming.

“Ladies and gentleman, this is your reminder to place your devices on airplane mode. We are approaching take-off,” a thick, European accent declared over the PA system.

I wrestled to retrieve my phone from my bookbag, which was squished in between my feet. When I was able to lift it towards me, the screen lit up. There was a buzz from the device that vibrated my hand then the appearance of a text message.

Oliver: Daisy, I need to tell you…

The message cut itself off, only the sneakpeek visible due to the system settings I had on my device.

It was ominous, though, like it had chosen to cut itself off there.

The tail end of that message could be- anything.

Daisy, I need to tell you…you’re a dumb bitch?

…I fucking hate you.

I love you?

Please, stay?

I don’t think I wanted to know.

My thumb hesitated over the screen, barely gracing it’s smooth glass. If I tapped on the message, if I saw what he said…would it change things?

Would it make me hate him even more?

Would it make me want to stay?

I didn’t want anything else to make my decisions anymore. I wanted to make my own choices, based on my own actions, thoughts. I was tired of living up to everybody’s image of me. If that was all I learned this summer, to be true to what I wanted, to be true to myself…then maybe this summer wasn’t so bad after all.

Maybe there had been something to find- maybe that something was me.

The shaking in my hands must’ve made the screen react to a ghost of my fingerprint. The option to scan my face ID came as soon as a flight attendant passed by my section, a bright smile on their face.

“Hi, friend! Did you put your device on airplane mode?” They asked with a slight gesture towards my phone.

I glanced back at the screen as she pointed. The message was open. That’s where it had ended, what Oliver had sent to me. “I need to tell you something.” But, he was still typing, still coming up with words to say.

My hands moved quickly, sliding down the menu and thumbing the airplane option. If he were still typing, I couldn’t see it anymore.

And any messages he may try to send would go green, undelivered, lost.

Forgotten, in the skies, somewhere between London and Germany, during the beginning of a cold, cold autumn.

[ablogofloveandtrash]

Ok but...

Are we not going to talk about how affected Damon can get when it comes to acceptance and validation? All throughout the segment where Damon had to choose to take back his accusation on Diana with logic or emotions, that throughout the entire thing, the main takeaway was how Diana's actions towards him got to him. The Pathos route shows his internal conflict more but even if the player goes with the logos route, the game still finds a way to show that Damon's emotions do affect him and his judgement. When he sees Diana and hears her cry, his empathic side comes out and part of him begins to feel conflicted on his initial accusation. The others are scared, frightened or angry at Diana, but in the midst of the chaos, Damon begins to feel for Diana. He seems to be aware that Diana was the cause of his inner turmoil yet is unsure of the reason.

Currently I think part of the reason may be simple. It's that Damon has known and felt Diana's kindness before the trial. For in the brief moments they spoke in Daily Life, Damon quietly takes in his thoughts when Diana gave him and Eva the benefit of the doubt. At this point, Damon was probably going on the assumption that the others, especially Wolfgang were not going to be welcoming to him, especially after no one seemed to initially accept his words and mostly deemed that Damon just thought he was 'better' than everyone else. So seeing that Diana still wants to include the two that were casted out and isolated from the rest, Damon adheres to it. To some extent it almost seemed like he is rather drawn to this kindness on a subconscious level. As though he is rather unused to how Diana acts around him, with the way she playfully flirts with him in the first free time event. As he seems speechless whenever Diana expresses joy or excitement even for the little things, when she asks him a few questions in both free time events. Damon clearly has not spoken to many others around him and his lack of sociability is present. But it also shows how sensitive and reactive he is in the situations he is in with Diana involved.

Screen shot below shows his visible reaction to Diana's. He just said 'Sure, I guess.' Provided how excited she looked it makes relative sense that Damon didn't expect someone to find so much delight in his response. But despite how much Damon tries to not express himself as much as Diana does, as he tries to act calm and cool, he does quite the opposite. Reacting to when Diana jokes that Damon could work on his tie. Provoking a reaction out of him. Parts of it even dives on what I could guess as a lack of self esteem for Damon. Because even though he's a loner and doesn't quite wear his heart on his sleeve, he finished the first event feeling overwhelmed. I believe this is due out of him not being used to such flattering company that he didn't quite know how to process it. And provided the way he said it, does seem to establish that Damon at his core really shows that he is lonely and has a sense of self loathing.

Damon almost seems to take in those words like it's some sort of mockery towards him. Like as if, he views self-help as a pointless thing that serves to make fun of him. It rather makes me pity Damon when I saw this. Yet even though he felt exhausted, he seems to feel flattered and touched by her attempts to comfort him. Something he continues to process to the next free time event, when he confronts her on her attempts to please and flatter him. And because of his curiosity and lack of knowledge around kindness, he always finds himself thinking about it. Becoming drawn to it, like something in him deeply yearns for. But his mind fights Damon on it, as he is caught up in the killing game. Because in the game, becoming too trusting with others could make him an easy target. He is suspicious of her behaviour in the second event and even into the night before the first body discovery.

Because as much Damon deep inside wants to be cared for and accepted, he still cannot fully trust her kindness. Yet he is still left thinking about it, as he ignored Tozu's announcements and lets his thoughts stew until he returned to Kai's dorm. This was the last major interaction between him and Diana, up until the trial. And as we circle back to the trial, that is where we see Damon's feelings come to light. before the non-stop debate Damon becomes conflicted about his logic and his feelings. Though he has yet to fully know and trust Diana, a part of him didn't seem to want to give up the sliver of kindness that he's finally recieving. In a game of uncertainty, fear and death. Diana's kindness almost feels like a shelter in Damon's heart. He doesn't want to lose hold of it, nor does he want to be met with the disappointment that Diana could have actually killed Wolfgang. From the way he reacts in the moment, it almost seems like Damon had emotionally craved for something like Diana's unconditional kindness. Even when suspicion was still on Diana, Damon seemed restless about the accusation until he can fully assure that Diana was innocent and that she did not commit the murder. Even after suspicion on Diana starts to clear, that Damon remains vigilant. He isn't as quick to jump to a culprit but he internally reminds himself that while Diana could have thrown the car battery, later into the trial, that it is only a possibility as of now. It is not the truth as of yet.

It's almost certain that Damon has grown attached to Diana, or the kindness she offers him outside of the trial. Perhaps it is from being deliberately isolated is what causes him to become drawn to her. Her concern and affection. For even if it was or wasn't genuine, Damon desperately craved it. These thoughts persist, regardless if you played logos and pathos. But subtly hints more on Damon's emotions if the logos route is played. Yet either way, he recognizes that it's because of Diana, Damon's judgement was affected by her. She's already left an impact on him that he doesn't fully comprehend.

He goes hard on himself for caring so much about how Diana felt, and how much her feelings affects him, that the pathos route doubles down on. His attraction is something he seems to be attempting to push away, even though it is unlikely that his attraction won't go away for the time being. Even if the future may look grim, and that Diana has plans to follow in Wolfgang's footsteps, it's not going to deter Damon from having such profound feelings and attachment. It really makes any possible interactions all the more intriguing with their opposing personalities and views. Yet the two could grow closer in ways we've yet to expect. As with Damon is now left raw and vulnerable from his losses at the end of the chapter, he's even more at the mercy of his emotions rather than not. More so with the way Diana is making him feel. She sees the good in others and because of her influence slowly brings out the good in Damon. Even if he's unsure of it, or ready to acknowledge it, she too could help Damon change for the better. Perhaps if she became a rival, it is to challenge his character and his heart. It's an intriguing take to the rival role if the game goes in that direction.

[eclipsethemagic]

Snowed in |KNJ| |M|

Summary: Being roommates with Namjoon has always had it's ups and downs, but being snowed in with him? Well maybe it will be fun

Paring: Nonidol! Namjoon xf!reader

Genre: Smut, fluff, lil bit of angus

sw: unprotected sex ( don't do- be safe), soft Dom Joon ( we love gentle Joon), spit, ( you'll figure it out when you see it ), praise kink, choking (f.rec), semi rough sex, expedition kink?, breeding kink ( more so reader then Joon), hand kink ( you'll see)

Song of the day: worth it by: avant + railway by: stray kids

[s.masterlist]

w.c: 3,268

a/n: I’m sorry! This was been supposed to come out, and I got so back tracked from work and then school that I just am now posting it. Don’t worry the rest of the Christmas oneshots will be posted, and if there’s any mistakes in here I’m sorry :(

Namjoon has to be an idiot if he thought that it wouldn't snow. Namjoon has to be an idiot to book a vacation with all of his friends in the middle of the mountain in the middle of December and didn't think it wouldn't snow.

He's an idiot.

He felt like the universe was laughing at him, telling him that he is indeed an idiot. And it wouldn't have been bad if he wasn't stuck with you. His roommate, one of his very best friends. But you and Namjoon weren't on talking terms at the moment, and it wasn't like he hated you. Oh no, he actually enjoyed your company throughout the whole vacation. It was just- you hated him. And it wasn't like it was a good reason too.

You and him had a disagreement about one of your good friends that Namjoon hated and he didn't want them there. Which you invited the person anyway and it sent Namjoon into a spiral. He stopped talking to you for a week, and then the week turned into a month before your trip. Yoongi, Namjoon other best friend, suggested that you two should talk before the trip, which you did on your ride there to the cabin. Namjoon and you had agreement that you two would be civil, and that you should keep your friend away from him during the trip.

Which you did.

But that was until the night before. Namjoon had just got out of the shower, he had on his sweatpants and a hoodie as he walked downstairs to the living room. Everyone was doing their own thing, Yoongi, and his boyfriend Jimin was packing their things up to leave that night leaving just you, Namjoon and that annoying ass friend of yours May. Namjoon didn't see that May was on the couch waiting for you to come downstairs, maybe it was the simple fact that any time he seen her he would just ignore her existence. "Oh it's you." Namjoon hears her voice from the bottom of the steps. A groan escapes his lips, he had two options. One was just going straight back upstairs and going to his room until she left or two go in the kitchen, hope she doesn't say anything to him and then go back upstairs. Before he could even pick any of those options the small girl walks up to him.

She smiles, flashing her pretty white teeth. May always tried to get Namjoon's attention whenever she could. And he hated it. Namjoon had a type, and May didn't check those boxes off. You know what else he hated? Was when he kissed her on new year's eve the year before. And he told her, he was drunk out of his mind when he seen her but nope. May just couldn't let him go. "Hi." It was simple enough to let her get the hint that he didn't want to talk to her. But knowing the girl in front of him, it didn't click in that tiny brain of hers. Namjoon walks past her, walking into the kitchen like planned. He then goes to grab a cup from the cabinet and opens the fridge to get some juice.

"You know, we been here for two whole weeks and haven't said a word to me." Namjoon mentally wants to shoot himself. He doesn't respond as the girl continues talking to him. "Did I do something wrong?" She ask. "Because if I did you a can tell me.." she whispers. Namjoon turns around to see her near the kitchen door, her hand playing with one of the ringers on her finger. She's not even looking at him and deep down Namjoon feels bad. I mean, she's right. He hasn't said a word to her the whole trip, but he also didn't even talk to her friend who just so happens to walk in the kitchen as well looking at them both.

"What's going on..?" You say, "is he being a dick again?" May doesn't say anything at first, her eyes still looking at the floor. Namjoon continues to pour his juice, before he hears May's voice. "I just asked him why he's been ignoring me all week." She smiles at you, it was a weak one, But she still tried to smile. You could hear the sadness in her voice as she spoke and it made you feel bad. "Joon stop being an asshole."

Dick? Asshole?

"Asshole? You're calling me an asshole?" He repeats back to you, his eyes widen and his long pointy fingers digs into his chest as he points to himself and then back at you. May's mouth goes to open before she's cut off by you. "Yes. You. You're being a dick and asshole, stop being an asshole." Namjoon lets out a little laugh, you see his jaw moves a bit before he slams the fridge close when he puts the juice back. With his glass in his hand he walks past you both, and the kitchen door slams causing May to flitch a little.

And after that, Namjoon hasn't said a word to you. Even when May left early the next morning Joon didn't even say bye to the girl, even now as the snow leaves you two stuck in, he hasn't left his room and it started to worry you. Maybe calling him an asshole and a dick was too much, but if felt right at the time. It needed to be said, because truth be told Namjoon was indeed being a dick, a bitch and everything above, over a girl who did nothing to him. Deep down his and May's relationship was never like that. Even since high school they always been somewhat cordial. But if you think about it too much, your brain starts to hurt. You knock twice on your best friend's door, nothing, so you knock again. "Hey Joon? I made you a grilled cheese and some soup. I haven't seen you all day, or have you left that room. Joonie I'm starting to worry." With a sigh you place the tray near his door. "I'll leave it by your door..please eat." And with those words you leave, going to your own room and shutting the door softy.

Namjoon doesn't open the door until he hears your door shut. Looking down he notices the food, smiling softy. Even if he was still mad at you, somehow you knew how to make his heart hurt less. He shuts the door after grabbing the food and setting it on the desk near his bed. The snow was still falling, hitting the trees and covering the ground. Growing up Namjoon loved the snow, he loved looking at it, playing with it and he loved being in it. If his parents would have gave him a chance he'll probably live in it if he could. But that's what the thing was about Namjoon, snow reminded him of you oddly enough. You were beautiful just like snow, he could look at you and not get tired of looking at you, just like snow. His heart grew 10 times more when he was near you like snow, and his mood would get 10 times better being with you like snow. And if you would give me a chance like the snow does, he'll make your life worthwhile.

Namjoon doesn't know when his fascination about you came about, but he knew that you were the most beautiful girl he laid his eyes on. His junior year in high school was the first time you came over to his house, it was the first time he seen his mom be so friendly with a girl he ever brought over. In fact it was the first time he seen his mom so excited that you'll come over the next day, and you did, you came over the next day, and the day after that and the day after that until his mom passed away. He remembers the day before she died, and the words she spoke. "Keep her son, she's a keeper. Do it for mama hm?" And ever since then Joon hasn't left your side.

It had to be 5 in the morning when Namjoon finally came out of his room. His dishes in his hand as he walks down the stairs slowly, trying to not fall. He noticed the Christmas tree lights where still on when he walks in the kitchen, setting his dishes in the sink, he walks back in the  living room to turn them off, that's before he noticed you on the couch, curled up under the covers. You look so peaceful, and as much as he wants to look at you, he's questioning why you're down here in the first place. Namjoon walks over to you, he bends down and shakes you gently. "Petal." He mumbles, and he does it again when you don't wake up. You let out a groan, your eyes squeezes shut. "Petal, you have to get off the couch come on." He says and you open your eyes just a bit to look at him. He smiles softly when you shake your head, the sleep crowning your brain and Namjoon does the next best option. He picks you up, one arm underneath you as he walks back up the stairs. Your head is against his chest, falling back to sleep without a care in the world.

The few days after that, you and namjoon's relationship got better. And the first time since you two been snowed in, you actually went outside with him to play in the snow. It was the first in a very long time that he seen you smile. And that's all he ever wanted for you, was to smile. "So Christmas is tomorrow and we're stuck here." You pout as you flop on the couch next to him. "Is it that bad that you're stuck here with me?" Namjoon says as he looks up from his book. His glasses on the bridge of his nose, and he turns his head at you. "I'm not saying that it's bad that I'm with you, I'm just saying that it's bad that we're stuck here and not at home. Don't you miss your bed? I miss my bed." You still pout and it's hard for Namjoon to not smile at you.

"Technically speaking you haven't even been in your bed, you been in mines. And yes, I do I miss home, but with you? I can make a home out of anything petal." Normally his flirting wouldn't make you feel all hot, and your cheeks burn. But it did, in fact the water you were drinking made you choke after hearing those words leave his mouth. Who was he to tell you that? And why did his words have such an affect on you? And what made matters worse, is that Namjoon knew how to use his words for use- he's smart like that. And his words made your cunt throb. Yeah maybe you do need to get laid.

"Shut up." Is all you could say, Namjoon lets out a deep chuckle. his dimples on full display as he continues to look at the book he was reading. "Aw, did I make you shy?" He questions as he grabs a sticky note from the coffee table and puts it in between the part he was reading and shuts the book. "No."

"No?" He questions again as he looks at you. He notices that you quickly look away, a small smile forming on your lips that makes him want to laugh. "Okay maybe. But who just says that?"

"Say what?"

"That- are you trying to trick me right now?" Namjoon sees you tilt your head. "No, I'm being serious." He laughs and shakes his head. "Use your big girl words." Fuck, did your pussy get wetter? "Do you mean it? That you can make a home out of anything if I'm by your side?" You see Namjoon nod his head and smile. He shoots closer, and you feel like your heart is beating out of your chest. "Yeah, I mean it petal." He stares in your eyes, his dragon shaped eyes staring back at you. "Can I kiss you?"

What?

Your eyes widen as you hear your own words leave your mouth. And it doesn't make it better when Namjoon blinks, his eyes widen just like yours. "Kiss me?" He switches from English to Korean so fast that it makes you nervous. "I mean- sure?" It was a question, and that made you more nervous than before. "We don't have to-" you're cut off when you feel his plumped lips on yours. You could taste his strawberry chapstick, and a groans leaves your lips when he pulls you closer. His lips moves against yours, it was like his lips were meant for yours. Namjoon feels your hands grip his shirt, his own hands moving from the back of your neck to your waist, squeezing the fat just a bit. You don't know when you two pull away, but he looks at you, a small smile forms on his lips as he grins at you. "I'm so glad I wanted to do this." And you don't comment on it, as you pulls his face to yours to kiss you again.

Everything happened so fast, at first you two were just kissing, but then you crawled in his lap, and then you started grinding on him, and the next thing he knows is that he's on top of you, rubbing his dick against your wet folds. He's mesmerized. His dragon like eyes glued on your cunt, the way it feels so warm against him. And the sounds it makes, the sounds you make, his brain is spinning. And what makes matters worse is that he thinks your pussy is so pretty, he actually mumbles it when he first seen it. And that made you feel all warm inside. "Joon? Please? Can you fuck me please?" He hears you say, a whine leaves your throat when he groans, a fat glob of spit lands on your cunt and Namjoon rubs his dick again against you for good measure before he slides into you.

It's uncomfortable at first, since he didn't prep you and he's so big. You felt like he would split you in half, thick and big, and you should have known the stretch would burn. You feel him stop at first, your eyes fluttering close. "Do you want me to stop baby?" God the pet name. You let out a low hum opening your eyes just a bit. "No, you can keep going." He nods, and continues to slide in. When he bottoms out you feel namjoon big hand bring your legs up against your chest before he moves his hips. The couch was smaller than him, and he really tried his best not to hurt you. The last thing he wanted for yalls first time was to hurt you and for you to never let him touch you again.

Once he got the rhythm just right, a loud moan is heard from your lips. Your hand grips his arm to sturdy yourself and you feel namjoon go deeper if that was possible and his hand presses down the bottom of your stomach. "Fuck you're so tight petal." He grunts, and you're so fucked out that you don't even notice Namjoon slowing down his movements. A whine leaves your lips, and Namjoon looks down at you, he leans down to pull you in a kiss, taking your breath away before he slams his hips against yours. "S-Sorry, I thought I seen someone outside." Oh, that's right, Namjoon left the curtains wide open when he came down after he left his room in the morning. Usually it would turn you off to know someone could see you getting dicked down by your best friend but for some reason the thought of someone seeing you like this, so fucked out of your mind, being your best friend flush light, his little sex toy, that it made you even more wetter then before. "Shit- baby did you get tighter?" Namjoon lets your legs go for a moment, you feel his thumb rub against your puffy clit and your eyes roll back.

"There you go, go ahead and cream on my cock baby, that's it good fucking girl." You don't know when your orgasm hit, but you felt like you were floating. A white ring of your cum coats his dick as he goes harder, he could feel his orgasm in the bottom of his stomach. You bring namjoon's free hand to your throat, and he tilts his head for a moment. When it finally clicks, he nods and squeezes your throat and you moan. "F-Fuck baby I'm going to cum, where you want it?" In you. Is the first thought that comes to your mind. The thought of Namjoon hot seed filling you up makes your brain shut down in the best way. "In me, please baby? I want your babies, don't you want to mark me as yours? I'll be yours forever."

Fuck, Namjoon wanted that. He lets go of your throat and goes faster, with a few thrust later Namjoon cums inside you and a moan leaves his throat. After riding out his high he pulls out slowly, and he goes to kiss you again.

After you two finish cleaning up and showering you end up laying down in his bed. Your head on his chest as he rubs circles against your back. "What now?" He hears you say against him. Namjoon doesn't say anything at first, afraid of saying the wrong thing. "You..I mean do you like me?" He ask, and it makes you think. Do you like him? I mean the signs were there. You hated him when he kissed May that night, you actually hated any female he ended up dating because it wasn't you. So do you like him?

"Yeah.. do you like me?"

"I thought it was obvious." He snorts and you look up at him. "The fuck do you mean you thought it was obvious? I ain't know shit Namjoon." He bites the bottom of his lip, a laugh threatening to leave his lips. "Pay attention more?" He says and you hit his chest playfully. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" He laughs. "Yes petal, I like you, I like you a lot actually. Why you think I turn down May every chance I get?" Well, you always thought it was because he was playing hard to get, or just being a dick. "Because you're a dick, why else?"

"Don't piss me off." He mumbles and rolls his eyes and it makes you giggle just a bit. "Well if that's the case, I like you too." You smile and peck his lips before laying back down. "Well that was easy enough." You hear him mumble and it makes you laugh. "Yeah, yeah."

[fistfuloflightning]

You’re welcome for those wiki tabs! Oh gosh your tags are lovely ☺️—hope you don’t mind me preserving them here:

#hello op I'm here to tell you I am continuing to love your brain#I feel like I need to study the technical aspects of clothing more so thank you for inspiring the wiki tabs on my phone#I like the idea of Fitzwilliam being at the border and sometimes having to return home#like this is the guy that becomes someone's pretend husband because you can just say 'oh yeah uh I'm married already. no you can't meet him#'no it's not because he's not real it's because he's at the border not because you're coming onto me & I don't like you'#that of course is a complete tangent and nothing to do with the actual story. also I just watched 100 days my prince#that's a huge tangent though. lol. anyway:#one can only hope family obligations are infrequent enough. plus she can still brag about how patriotic he is#I wANt mY NepHEWS oN tHE THrown...he's still at the border? send word post haste to return! *feeble old persona switch*#*activate queen dowager mode* where is my OTHER nephew. I will NOT see my family disposed!#actually how is georgiana turning out here? can she play the gayageum O.o??

The whole Darcy/Fitzwilliam/de Bourgh is just hilarious to me. It feels like such a literal three ring circus, with everyone running around and juuust missing each other by minutes

Fitzwilliam would definitely be down to play the ‘fake boyfriend’ for one of his besties, and somehow gets a womanizer reputation out of it even tho he’s never actually been in a relationship.

Lady Catherine would be the scheming dowager, but like just really hilariously obvious to everyone that she’s scheming. She’s got her network of eunuchs and maids running around playing spy, and some of the court officials as well (Collins 👀—who kinda blows cover when he meets Darcy and pretty much gushes about how Darcy’s set up to marry Princess Anne, no he’s not going sit in the throne itself but Darcy’s son will have the throne so that means it’ll stay in the clan in any case! And Darcy just goes cold and backs tf away 😆 )

And you bet Georgiana would play the gayageum (plus a hundred other instruments) and one of the things Darcy enjoys best is sitting outside with his little sister and listening to her practice (perhaps that’s how Wickham first seduced her, finding her practicing alone in a garden pavilion and approaching her like the smooth scumbag he is). I think Lady Catherine is also pretty protective of Georgiana and blames Darcy for not fulfilling his brotherly duties (unsure if in this au she’s aware of the Wickham situation, if thinking that since he failed to protect her Lady Catherine would do it for him and demanding Georgiana be brought to live in the palace which Darcy would ofc fight)

Ngl I think Confucian doctrine weirdly translates well to the values of Regency England as well and I think that’s what originally sold me on this au—the values don’t really change much, women’s place in their respective societies don't change much, and I just find that fascinating. Something like Mr Bennet being a Confucian scholar and teaching his first two daughters to the best of his knowledge, losing steam with Mary, and then absolutely giving up with Kitty and Lydia and just leaving their education to his wife (which is part of the reason they turn out the way they do (and was largely inspired by my favorite P&P fic Mr. Bennet Travels Through Time, read it. please.))

A few more character designs for the Pride and Prejudice Joseon AU: Mr Collins, Lady Catherine, and George Wickham

I’ve been rereading My Royal Awakening and Crush in Spring and those manhwas gave me a bit more inspo for this au. I couldn’t unsee Lady Catherine in eoyeo meori so I turned her into the queen dowager—which would make for some interesting nepotistic dynamics with her nephews if she favors her own clan in politics, and both Darcy and Fitzwilliam are probably not about that life lol.

Darcy could be a junior official at court where he wears his mask constantly as a matter of survival, or maybe even a scholar of Sungkyunkwan. Fitzwilliam is always gone to the border and only comes home when he’s forced to.

And Mr Collins… *deep sigh* Mr Collins is probably in a lesser administrative position and uses his connection with the queen dowager to crawl his way up the ladder.

[rekino2114]

Pet names headcanons with brave danganronpa girls

A/n:first bdr post since it's won the poll

Anko hibana

Unironically calls you pookie

Ok, it kinda started as a joke. She thought it was funny, so she called you that to make you laugh. But you both actually liked it, so it stuck

You eventually ended up calling her pookie, too, so you two just purposefully come up with the most cheesy and over the top pet names you can think of and call each other them endless to the annoyance of everyone else

"Oh, hi anko, how are you?"

"Better now that my super adorable and sweet pookie bear is here~"

"Thanks, I'm glad you're here too cutest pookiest hottest best girlfriend ever"

"Awwwww that was soooo cute but I should have expected that from my precious, wonderful and amazing pookie"

"........can you two shut up?"

Rei tsuji

She might not know what a pet name is

Listen, this girl is like the most not used to a relationships person ever. Every day she's with you, she discovers something new she didn't know couples did, and pet names are a part of it

The first time you called her honey she was like "....do you want some?" And literally went to grab you honey

You just call her by her name or some variation of it now so she doesn't get confused

"Hey rei-rei how are you?"

".....ehm good but why did you repeat my name?"

"It's a cute nickname, you don't like it?"

"No.....it's fine.......y/n-y/n"

"I....don't think it works quite as well with my name"

"O-oh I see.....sorry"

"It's fine"

Stella hoshinari

She's very classic with pet names, she likes to call you dear, darling or love.

She especially uses them when she's jealous. She knows you're really hot (she tells you that so often) so she has to make sure everyone knows you're with her, even if a lot of people already know it due to how famous she is

You call her classic nicknames too but your absolute favorite to call her is star or my star because that's what she is (and also that's what her name means)

"Oh sorry darling, was I interrupting something?"

"Oh no sorry Stella, that girl started flirting with me but I told her I had a girlfriend"

"Don't worry my love, I heard everything, I'm not surprised she tried to flirt with you, you are very attractive if I say so myself"

"Aww thanks, you're beautiful too my star"

Urara amemiya

She has many pet names for you, she basically calls you by nicknames more than your actual name

Her favorite one is snookums, though. Don't ask her why she just thinks it's cute, even if it's kinda weird you like it since it fits urara's vibes

She also sometimes calls you names from manga series (mainly those she creates) even better if it's the love interest of a character she likes or of the protagonist. You don't always get the reference, but when she explains it, it becomes one of your favorite names

"Hellooo, how's it going snookums?"

".......what's that?"

"What?"

"A snookums"

"To be honest, I have no idea, I was told it's a pet names for partners though"

"Oh I get it, it's cute"

"Hehe, I'm glad snookums"

Honoka onizaki

Definitely calls you hottie, hot stuff, and anything like that, it's a pet name and a compliment at the same time, what more could you want?

She is also a very frequent pet names user, she also comes up with them on the fly, like she changes how she calls you basically every day for absolutely no reason

You like to call her bombshell for obvious reasons. She's hot, and she likes bombs that nickname is literally made for her

"Yo! Wazzup magma, having a good day?"

"......m-magma? What does that have to do with anything?"

"It's you.....get it? Cause you're hot....like magma"

".....oh"

"Nah, I get it it's stupid....how about....."

"Honoka, it's fine, you can call me babe or something like that"

"And where's the fun in that? I need to be more creative"

".....whatever at least they're cute"

Hana kongou

She actually doesn't use pet names that often, preferring to call you by your name, but she still likes using them once in a while

Her favorite ones are sweetheart, sweetie, my sweet, anything to imply how nice and kind you are to her, cause that's one of the main things she loves about you

You like to call me princess, or my princess because that's what she reminds you of, especially when she puts on some dresses she made. And she always blushes whenever you call her that but she still loves it

"Hey y/n, do you mind hanging out later?"

"Oh definitely not, I'd love to princess"

"D-don't call me t-that it's embarrassing"

"You don't like it?"

"N-no I do......it's just....in front of other people it's kinda.....nevermind...I really like it"

"I'm glad, my princess~"

"T-thanks sweetheart"

Ume omori

She is probably the least pet name forward girl here, it's not that she doesn't like them she just uses your name more often

She genuinely doesn't know what to call you. If she really feels like calling you something else that isn't your name, she'll just use a shortened version of it

You call her cutie, and she always blushes and tells you to stop. Sometimes, you even say ghost cutie. She's a bit more accepting of this but still doesn't really like it

"Hey ghost cutie, what are you doing?"

"S-shut up, don't call me that"

"Why thought? You are really cute and like ghosts"

"But I'm not one, if you call me that, they might get angryyyyyy"

"Oh OK.......can I call you just cutie then?"

"*sighs*"

[goddessxdivine]

SydCarmy’s sex life based on this @thoughtfulchaos773 reply:

love this take because i also see a lot of ppl saying syd is the dominant one. and i don’t disagree but …. she’s the golden retriever. i think the black cat/golden retriever dynamic suits Carmy and Sydney, respectively. the black cat/golden retriever are both dominant and leaders but it just depends on when. this dynamic has two people that are dominant in different ways at different times, especially depending on their mood.

in the black cat/golden retriever dynamic, i think syd is dominant in a golden retriever way. black cat can be seen as more nonchalant than golden retriever. black cat isn’t always going to bring the excitement so they can hang back while golden retriever does the talking and socializing but black cat can take the reins when necessary. whereas golden retriever is more sociable and energetic so its easier to consider them as dominant. but when golden retriever has used up all their energy, black cat can step up in the role of being dominant.

i think syd and carm are that het relationship we see often in real life, the one where the woman is the more lively one and she’s headstrong. think about the kind of girl who has her opinions and will voice them, and has her own threshold for the kind of bullshit she’ll accept. again, she’s headstrong. which to everyone else makes her the leader of their relationship. this may be true. she may oftentimes steer the ship except in the bedroom

for some reason the only real life example i can think of is Rihanna. there’s this discourse of whether Rihanna is dominant or submissive sexually (it’s no one’s business really, but for the purposes of this). if you’ve seen the conversation around this then you’re familiar with the idea that Rihanna is a strong woman, who is a leader, and doesn’t take bullshit. in the bedroom, however, she does not mind being led at all.

the kind of woman who will go toe to toe with a man over what they consider worth it, is the same woman who will let a man she considers worth it to tell her “lay down, spread your legs, let me see that throbbing juicy puss”

not trying to be weird as i say this, but i speak from personal experience. and the conversation feels reductive and the verbiage feels like a setback for women’s rights advancement lmao but bear with me. as someone who is considered “a mouthy woman”, the only time I’ll allow a man to tell me to shut up is sexually. I’d never let a man talk to me crazy. matter of fact, most men i come across learn quickly that I don’t play those games lol but when it comes to sex, there something enticing about a man who knows how to take the lead. and this doesn’t mean he has a lengthy resume of sexual experience. it just means that he knows how to be in command.

this to me, is Sydney and Carmy’s relationship. the way people are socially can be but is not always telling of how they are in the bedroom. specifically in social situations, you may see Syd be more talkative and command the room (think: the Ever funeral) but that doesn't necessarily mean she's always in command. i think sexually it’s 60/40 (not a real estimate lol) where he’s dominant at least 60% of the time and the other 40% is left to circumstance. unless your romantic relationship has an established "this is my dom, i am a sub" dynamic, most relationships are going to shift between who takes the lead. this is where I can see the "Syd is a dom and Carm is her sub" idea.

sexually, Carmy is likely to be so in tune with Syd and her body that he’s the metronome ensuring the tempo and the pitch of her sexual pleasure. this is where i think the "Carmy is a munch" idea is very accurate. he wants to make her feel good and know he's the reason she does. but because the dynamic shifts who is in the lead, there are times where she's the one saying "lay down . i want to make you feel good" or "get on your knees, eat me"

tl:dr Carmy is usually more sexually dominant than Syd but they switch

[deathbringerdragon]

Hey Monkey Wrench fans! I wanna do a little game of sorts.

I wanna see how everyone else got into/found monkey wrench. So if ya see this, go ahead and reblog it with your story! It can be I'm the tags or in the actual body of the post, doesn't matter!

I personally found monkey wrench one night about.. eehhh.. a week to a week and a half before Christmas?

I was on YouTube on my phone looking for videos to watch while I ate dinner, cuz I was home alone and bored. And low and behold, the first episode of Monkey Wrench popped up in my recommendations.

The fact that it not only Showed up at that time. But that I also for Some reason was either bored enough, or curious enough to decide to watch it, will forever be a mystery to me. Cuz normally I am So hesitant to watch something new that I'm not already familiar with.

And boy howdy. I was BAFFLED by the first episode. It was so different compared to the stuff I normally like and enjoy or am willing to engage with.

But the second episode was right underneath the first one. Sooo. I clicked on it cuz I was still bored and now mildly curious/interest.

And then I finished the second episode, and my curiosity was starting to grow.

So I watched the third episode. And That's when I was hooked.

No clue why that's the episode that hooked me. But if I remember my thoughts correctly, I'm like 70% certain it had to do with the scene when scratch is talking about the cataclysm, and the giant green eyeball shows up.

So yea. Thats how I got into monkey wrench.

And then 3 days later the 4th episode came out and I just became obsessed with it.

Which is really funny cuz my friend whom I was talking about MW to in dms during those days, can testify that I was trying SO HARD not to become hyperfocused on MW because only two weeks prior I had JUST gotten into a different show

[magpie-blues]

What if I was sent to kill you and we have a duel at your home on Lothal and we make eye contact and I stab you with my saber but you’ve been healed and now we have another chance to duel together and I can try to kill you again for my former Jedi Sith master.

Jk jk… unless

[piko-rose]

My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)

When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.

She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.

She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.

She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.

...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.

Remember this line?

You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:

Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?

...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)

As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.

She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.

I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.

...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.

I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.

And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.

She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.

During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.

She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.

But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.

Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.

...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?

But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.

If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.

I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.

She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.

Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.

So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.

She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.

For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.

She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.

But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.

If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.

But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.

He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.

He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)

She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.

He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.

Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.

They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.

None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.

They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.

Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.

It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.

Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.

She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.

She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...

She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.

I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.

How much he loves her.

And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.

Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.

It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.

She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.

I feel like this moment here...

-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.

Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.

And it's all thanks to Sonic.

If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.

Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.

He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.

Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.

Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.

They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.

"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"

"Wouldn't dream of it."

[idontliketomatoesleavemealone]

My heart is beating so hard I’m so pissed about Everything rn

[untitledgoosegay]

i'll strangle you or i'll kiss you on the mouth

[falindankovsky]

Look I fundamentally understand why they’ve opted to remove survival/combat mechanics from p3 but like…I’m so sad that means I can’t occur a random bloodlust again!