#bc the group was supposed to be called and the angels and then as boys do

[oeurie]

initially !!! i wanted everyone to disappear as soon as they turned 20 to emphasize the cusp of something ( in this case adulthood and a kind of theft of it ) and then most of their "prime" years with for romance so when they re emerged in their 30s they would be completely changed / new people but i wanted the ages to match with dates for year of the rabbit and the ages were a little wonky when some of them were supposed to be pretty popular before the disappearance so 24 works especially considering there's 24 years ( I think💀💀💀 ) between aoi and then the newcomers in saturn ( madchen and the prince are smack dab in the middle bc there's always an out of place cast member ) currently most of them are two years shy of another cusp of something ( aoi are almost 50 mad and the prince are almost 40 and then the younger two are almost 30 if i did the math right the oldest two are ending on an 8 two years shy of the coming up age when the story starts whereas the younger two are smack dab in the middle like a crossroad it could go either way ) which is either going to be a new loop or a breaking of the current one -> the cusp of adulthood is the same as the cusp of perfection an almost attainable something that they never really get to reach bc they aren't the actual what they're supposed to be or what for romance / their parents wanted them to be but they could be an almost

[its-time-to-write]

this is 100% self indulgent. no one asked for this except me and I have zero excuse for how it turned out. i have no defense, no witty rebuttal, no nothing. i wrote this because i wanted to, and at the very least i hope this inspires someone to write their borderline-self-insert fic and post it publicly.

this fic is set after season 3. enjoy😂

(oh now might also be a good time to mention how much I love Man City. bc it’s a lot.)

can’t hear my thoughts (i cannot hear my thoughts)

Calling Lake Como beautiful is like saying space is big. It’s true for sure, but it feels like an understatement. It’s June and the weather is absolutely gorgeous, perfect for the wedding you’re attending. It’s for two good friends of yours, and it’s going to be a party full of football royalty. You’re mostly excited to see friends who are WAGs from other teams who you’ve connected with over the past year and a half.

Oh, and you suppose it will be a nice vacation with Jamie, too.

You’re staying at a beautiful hotel that’s been open since 1910, and you swear you’ll never stay somewhere as beautiful again.

“Getting ideas for the house?” Jamie teases, and it sends a thrill down your spine with the way he refers to his house as your collective home. 

You grin as he spins you around the Suite Greta. Everything is golden, from the drapes to the pillows to the sun catching on his face.

“No,” you reply, “but maybe for a vacation home?”

Jamie laughs as he catches you up in his arms. “I could see us here in the next off-season. Not sure we’d get out much,” he muses and you wrap your arms around him as tight as they can go.

You’re here for a full week but Isaac’s wedding is only one day. You and Jamie have plans to see everyone who’s in town, as well as have some time to yourself.

“Sasha wants to go out for dinner tonight,” you tell Jamie as he unpacks his suitcase.

“Girls only, or will Jack be there?”

“Let’s see,” you hum as you scan the group chat. “Isabel said she and Erling will be there, so looks like it’s a couple’s thing. That’ll be fun, right?” you ask with just a hint of anxiety. Jamie and Jack are friends, they’ve run in the same circles for years, but you’re not sure how he’s going to feel about being outnumbered two to one, City to Richmond, at dinner.

“As long as Rodri ain’t there, I’m fucking chuffed,” he says as he lays out his suit on the bed.

“Chuffed? Is that a thing you say now?” you ask, flat on your back on the bed.

“Yep,” he replies. “I’m posh now, babe. Sorry you Americans can’t do it as well as we Brits.”

“I have it on good authority that we do it very well,” you smirk. “But I don’t think that’s something you’ll get to experience tonight. I haven’t seen Sash or Isa in ages, so we’ll probably talk for a long time and then I’ll be tired when we get back to the room.”

Jamie groans. “You’re sadistic, woman. The shit you put me through.”

You smile and remind him, “You’re the one who picked me, remember?”

—

Jamie is technically the one who picked you. You had just moved from America to London, got a temp job at a Richmond FC, and the rest is history. You don’t work at Richmond anymore, haven’t for a while, as you’ve been able to start your own thing in between attending matches and events and whatever else Jamie’s invited to. Being Jamie’s girlfriend is a full-time job on its own, and he definitely spoils you beyond what you’re used to. He’s the one who bought your dress for the wedding and it freaked you out just a little bit until you called Sasha (an angel, by the way) who laughed and talked you off the ledge. 

“Comes with the territory, babe. They’re just boys with more money than they know what to do with. Jack’d buy me the moon if he could figure out how. Enjoy it. It’s been a while since anyone’s seen Tartt this happy.”

So you do. You had been living together for almost a year now so you’d think that a dress wouldn’t push you over the edge, but there you go. You’re trying to be calmer about it. It’s better ever since you met Sasha and Isabel. 

You had been stuck in a room while Jamie talked to his old manager, and they had noticed your deer-in-the-headlights expression. You’re right in the middle of the two, age-wise, and from similar enough backgrounds.

“Here’s my number. Come over to my flat tomorrow for brunch. We’ll get you settled, babes,” Sasha had said. You went and it had been amazing to finally make real friends, even if they were technically on the opposing team. 

You’re excited to see them, excited for Isaac to finally get married, and excited to spend a full seven days with Jamie by your side. It’s going to be the best.

—

You enter the venue arm-in-arm with Jamie, practically dancing across the grass. The sun’s shining and there are all sorts of people you know and love. It feels a little surreal to be here. 

Earlier, back in the room, you had slipped into your dress carefully to avoid getting makeup stains on the front. The skirt fell just at your knees and puffed out ever so slightly, with thick straps instead of regular sleeves so you could fully enjoy the warm weather. 

“Do a spin,” he had said, voice full of glee. You’d acquiesced, twirling around to let the blue tile print billow out before he caught you, kissing your shoulder so as not to ruin your makeup. 

Now, you’re holding onto him and trying not to wrinkle his linen suit when you hear someone shout your name. 

“Sasha!” you screech, running toward her as best you can with your shoes on the grass. You squeeze each other into a tight hug, uncaring about about the state of her hot pink dress. 

“Hey man,” Jack says to Jamie, who grins and shakes his hand. “You’d think they haven’t seen each other in fucking ages.”

“It’s been twelve hours,” you say. “And before that it’s been like two months. Anyway, don’t you two have some football to discuss or something? Or headbands? Or-”

“Really short socks,” Sasha helpfully supplies. 

Jamie shakes his head. “Fuck off, Attwood.”

“Fuck you, Tartt,” she replies. 

“Oi, you two wouldn’t even be friends if it weren’t for me. You could be a little nicer,” Jamie says. 

“Oh is that Hughes?” Jack asks before either Sasha or Jamie can escalate. Their entire friendship is based off sniping one another and neither you nor Jack are particularly in the mood for it today. 

Jamie turns to look. “Oh mint, looks like things are starting. You saved us seats?”

“Yeah, with Haaland and Isabel,” Sasha returns, linking her arm through yours. “C’mon, did you get yourself a parasol?”

—

It’s the most beautiful wedding you’ve ever been to. Stella looks stunning in her gown, Isaac stoically sobs his eyes out while Colin surreptitiously hands him a tissue. Even Roy seems to be having a good time, but then again Keeley once told you that he “really fucking loves weddings.” You hadn’t believed her, but his lips are in a straight line instead of a frown so maybe she was right. 

There’s a group of City and Richmond players together, and it’s a little strange to see how friendly they are off the pitch. Dani is explaining something with lots of hand gestures to Phil while the rest of the group jokes around. 

Sasha sneaked you and Isabel away to get drinks for yourselves and you were about to get away unnoticed when Erling caught Isabel’s arm and asked for a drink too, so now you’re ordering for your boyfriends as well as yourselves. 

You don’t really care, there’s a part of you that’s reveling in the sheer joy of being young and hot. Sue you. 

“Cosmo, please,” you say while the girls order drinks of their own. Sasha raises an eyebrow so you shrug and say, “Jamie likes what he likes.”

She rolls her eyes and scoffs “Tartt,” but it’s with the affection of an older sister so you elbow her and ask, “What did Jack want?”

She makes a face. “Heineken. He also likes what he fuckin’ likes.” 

You wheeze out a laugh as Isabel comes to join you. She smiles as she sips from something lavender colored in a martini glass. She cuts an elegant figure in her yellow, billowy dress. You smooth your dress and open your mouth to say something when a voice calls your name. You look to see your ex walking up, hand-in-hand with his wife. You know, the one he left you for. 

“Jake,” you say in surprise. God, you need your brain to form coherent thoughts right now. “What are you doing here?”

He grins, far too wide and goofy to be real. Not like Jamie, you think. 

“Oh, you know, Emma’s loosely related to the bride on her dad’s side. She asked for an invite, so here we are. Who are you here for? Bride or groom?”

“Both, actually,” you reply automatically. Jake’s words are grating, not so much in content as they are in tone. He always had a way of saying things condescendingly, like everyone else was a stupid little kid. 

“Oh,” he says in what you think is supposed to be surprise, “that’s funny. I didn’t know you knew anyone out here. You’ve been living in England all alone, right?”

Emma just hovers by Jake’s shoulder. She’s not contributing anything to this conversation except a snooty little smirk. 

“No,” you say. “I’m not alone. This is Isabel, by the way.” You look around for Sasha, but she’s disappeared. Smart girl. 

Isa doesn’t extend her hand. “Nice to meet you,” she says and Jake takes her at her word. He puffs up his chest a little bit as he asks, “Where are you from? You don’t sound British.”

“We’re from Norway,” a voice behind her says. “I’m Erling.”

Sasha has reappeared with Jack, Erling, and Jamie in tow. You mentally congratulate her with a well done, Sash as you feel Jamie’s arm loop around your waist. 

He feels like a solid wall against your back, a glimmer in an otherwise garbage moment. 

Jake takes stock of the three men who are looking at him with less-than friendly stares. You’re not sure what Sasha told them, but you’re absolutely positive Jamie recognizes Jake. You can practically feel the hairs on his arm bristling. 

Jake finishes his assessment and deems it appropriate to talk. “So, how do you all know each other?”

Jamie scoffs and looks away, while Jack stares at Jake like he can’t believe what he’s hearing. 

You wonder what it is with your affinity for J-names. 

“We’re footballers,” Erling says before anyone can take more offense. 

“Premier League footballers,” Jamie adds, as if it means anything to Jake. 

Jake’s American, like you, and he’s never been much for sports anyway. He wouldn’t even recognize David Beckham if the man were standing under a poster of himself. 

Jake says, “Right. Hey, weren’t you on one of those trashy dating shows?” and Jamie stiffens. 

Sasha mutters, “Fuck’s sake,” under her breath as Erling and Isabel take pointed interest in something in the distance.  

“No,” Jamie replies shortly. “The fuck were you talking to my girl?”

Jake looks to you in surprise. “Oh! You two are together? That’s… well, that’s… I guess I just didn’t expect her to be whoring around like that. But hey, move to another country and all morals go out the window, right?”

That’s the thing about Jake. He never speaks as if he’s actually trying to be offensive. He just says what’s on his mind. And you’re a little concerned that what’s on his mind is going to land Jamie (and quite possible Jack) in jail. Neither of them are especially known for backing down from a squabble. “Cut from the same cloth,” Pep was rumored to say. 

“Fuck off, mate,” Jack interjects. “Just fuck off. Everyone here loves her, and you can’t talk about her like that.”

Your ex reevaluates the situation at hand and decides the best thing to do would be to take Emma’s hand and walk away. 

“Strange that his wife does not speak,” Erling remarks. 

You grimace. “You could’ve stopped at ‘strange.’ No idea what I ever saw in him.”

Jamie has a crushing grip on your waist so you wiggle a bit to get him to loosen up. 

“Prick,” he mutters. “How the fuck did he even get here, anyway? He’s in fucking America.”

“His wife’s loosely related to Stella. They asked for an invite,” Isabel volunteers. 

Jamie rolls his eyes. “Oi, if he tries to talk to you again, I’ll grab Roy and we’ll fucking kill him.”

“Yeah, ‘cause McAdoo’s never been above a little violence at a party,” Jack grins. 

You return his smile and say, “Thanks, but I’m pretty sure his mother-in-law would kill you.”

Erling huffs out a laugh. “Never a dull moment in the Premier League, is there?”

Isabel grins and loops her arm through his. “I’m tired of all this,” she says.  “Let’s go dancing. There’s a band and we don’t have to think about anything other than celebrating, yes?”

“God yes,” says Sasha.

Jamie still looks murderous, but you squeeze his hand once and whisper, “I’m fine, babe. It’s fine.”

He looks like he wants to argue, but he lets you pull him along to the dance floor with the group.

— 

There are so many people that you don’t even catch a glimpse of Jake and Emma. You’re not sure what they’re up to, and fairly certain they don’t know anyone else here. You on the other hand, are living your best life as Jamie sings along to “Ain’t No Mountain.” He’s swinging your arms around as he sways in time to the music. You just let him lead you however he wants. The song ends and he presses his lips to your ear so you can hear him over the sheer volume of everyone talking. “D’you want a drink? I can go get you something.”

You nod and mouth my usual, please, so he salutes and begins weaving his way through the crowd. You watch him as long as you can before spinning back around with a smile.

A smile that quickly fades when you realize Emma is right in front of you.

She says, “Cute dress,” and for a moment, you believe she’s being sincere but then she follows it up with, “Did you borrow it from your grandma’s closet? I’ve seen people do that.” 

Right, because grandmas are known for wearing dresses like this. 

“What? No, Jamie got it for me,” you say. 

“Oh cute, is it from Walmart? I think I saw something like it there last week.”

Emma is trying to draw blood. You suppose she’s taking her shot now as opposed to back then because she thinks there’s no one around to call her out. No one who knows her. 

You say, “They don’t have Walmart here,” instead of “It’s Dolce & Gabbana,” because the second phrase would make you sound like a prick. There’s a part of you that wants to be a prick, though, wants to channel that part of Jamie that’s ruthless, vicious and cruel, messing with the opposition before he cuts them down. 

The first time you saw it, it was hard to believe the Jamie on the pitch was the same Jamie who played with your hair while you cooked, or put a sticky note on his fridge titled “Babe,” detailing everything you’d ever said you liked. 

Emma sees she’s not getting to you, so she changes tactics. “Must be hard being here without any friends,” she remarks. “All alone. And you’ve never been especially extraverted. Are those people the only ones here you know?”

God, Jamie, where are you?

You open your mouth to respond but are cut off by someone with a distinctly midwestern twang say, “I heard one of my favorite countrywomen was here.”

You turn to see Ted Lasso grinning at you in a black suit. It’s the same smile you remember, albeit his eyes are a little sharp. You’d bet anything he knows exactly what’s going on between you and Emma. 

“Ted!” you smile as a rush of relief floods your system. You step into his arms for a hug as he says, “Hey, sweetheart. How’ve you been?”

“Oh, you know,” you say. “Kind of great, actually. I wondered if you were going to be here! Have you seen Jamie yet?”

Ted shakes his head. “Y’know, I haven’t. Why don’t we find him together?” He offers you an arm and you take it gratefully, choosing not to spare Emma a glance.

“She seems like a real bucket of laughs,” Ted remarks.

“You have no idea. That’s my ex’s wife.”

Whatever Ted thought you were going to say, he certainly wasn’t prepared for that. He opens and closes his mouth a few times before settling on a short, “Well I’ll be danged.”

You laugh and stand on tiptoes to try to see Jamie. You don’t see him, but you catch a glimpse of an especially tall, blond head.

“This way,” you tell Ted. You brush past Phil who smiles at you, past Colin and Michael, and past someone you’re pretty sure is a Beckham.

You make your way to Erling and Isabel as they dance to the music in their own corner.

You frown. “Have you seen Jamie?” you shout. 

Isabel shakes her head. “He was looking for you,” she calls back.

“Oh,” you say, “Ted, this is Isabel and-”

“Erling Haaland,” Ted says, hand outstretched. “Pleasure to meet you, son. Big fan of the way you play the game.”

You miss Erling’s response, startled by a hand on your shoulder. You turn to see Sam standing behind you.

“Sam!” you exclaim with a grin, “You look so handsome!”

Sam returns your grin and strikes a pose. “I’ve been sent on a very important mission. I am to retrieve you and bring you to Jamie and I am under no circumstances allowed to let a small rat man named Jake speak to you.”

You raise an eyebrow. 

“Jamie’s words, not mine,” Sam clarifies. “Although I must admit, I have seen this rat man. I do not like him very much.”

“You and me both,” you agree. You wave to Isabel and pat Ted on the arm before following Sam.

He leads you away from the crowd of people to a stone path illuminated by small lights. This can’t be right, you think but Sam points down the path and says, “This is where I leave you.”

He turns to leave then changes his mind and spins back around. “It was lovely seeing you today, albeit for a short amount of time. I hope I will be seeing more of you while we are here. It is not often I meet someone who makes Jamie more tolerable.”

He speaks with a touch of humor and it’s just enough to dispel any apprehensions about what’s waiting for you in the dark. 

You say, “Thanks Sam. Love ya,” which he returns before he disappears back to the main party.

You take a breath and head down the steps.

It’s dark, the light barely shining enough for each step, but as you get farther you see a shadowy figure sitting on a bench under a tree. You smile. You can tell exactly who it is by his silhouette.

Jamie stands as you get closer and pulls you into his arms.

“Thought we’d sneak away to make out a bit,” he says. “And maybe to you wouldn’t yell at me in front of all our friends.”

You groan. “What did you do? Please tell me it has nothing to do with Roy. Or Jack. Oh my god, did you two start convincing people you were separated at birth again? Because it’s really only funny one time.”

“Well…” Jamie hedges.

You pinch his back. It’s the only part of him you can reach at the moment. “Jamie Tartt, you’d better tell me what you did right now or so help me you are going to be sleeping on the couch for the rest of our lives.”

“Oi, don’t fucking do that!”

He reaches back to grab your hands and holds them flat on his chest. “We- Roy, Grealish, and me, might have gotten your prick ex kicked out.”

“You what?” you gasp.

Jamie starts speaking in a rush before you can say anything else. “Look, y’know how protective Grealish gets, especially because Sasha fucking loves you, and then Roy heard that your prick ex was here (not the twat ex) and he said it’s easier for him to get in and out of fights on account of him being a fucking manager but then Grealish said that it’s pretty much expected that fights happen so might as well and anyway, no one’s gonna fuckin’ snitch on any of us because (hate to break it to you babe), but you’re, like, everyone’s kid sister. They’d fucking kill for you so it’s possible that we channeled that into threatening to break all of his bones if he ever ended up in the same country as you again.”

You’re processing all of the things Jamie said plus the incredible speed at which he said them, so all you can manage is a single “Okay,” before he’s talking again.

“Ehm, it’s also slightly-fucking-possible that someone did break his foot.”

“What?” you all but shout.

“Coordinated effort between Isa and Haaland,” Jamie says. “Lad’s a fucking wall, don’t know if you’ve noticed.”

“Jesus, Jamie,” you groan. “I don’t know if I should kiss you or pinch you again.”

“You can do both,” he suggests.

You sigh. “I’m going to kiss you. Like, a lot. And I’m not going to worry about getting caught and after we’ve snogged like a pair of kids in high school- sorry, secondary school, then we’re going to eat a bunch more food and dance with our friends. And if you want to get sloshed, I promise I will only take funny videos for myself, and I will not send them to your mum this time.”

Jamie says, “Liar,” as he kisses the tip of your nose.

“Fine,” you concede, “I will most definitely send them to your mum. And Simon. We’re on a group chat.”

“Not even gonna fucking ask,” Jamie says as he threads a hand through your hair so he can get at a better angle to kiss you.

—

You wake up the next morning (ahem, afternoon) to Jamie’s foot in your face.

“Excuse me, sir,” you say.

He hiccups himself awake. “Yeah?” he rumbles. “What fucking time..?”

“Late, I assume,” you say.

He groans and flips himself around so your heads are on the same side of the bed. He wastes no time in tangling your limbs together.

“Oi, koala boy. Some of us have morning breath.”

“No y’don’t babe,” he mumbles.

You scratch his head and a shudder runs through his body. “I know,” you say, “my breath is perfect. I meant you. I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

“Cruel woman,” he returns before lapsing into silence. The sun slips through the curtains, and you’re sure it’s going to be another gorgeous day

“Jamie,” you begin then stop.

He says, “Yeah, love?” while looking up at you with his gorgeous blue eyes and you take a moment to freeze this image in your head. 

Jamie Tartt, in bed, hair tousled from sleep. Pillowy white duvet, golden freckled skin, warm body pressed to yours.

He kisses your shoulder, rousing you from your thoughts. 

“Jamie,” you say again, “I wanted to say-”

“Don’t,” he interjects. “You’re not fucking allowed to say thank you for the bare fucking minimum.”

“But it’s not,” you reply, opting to skate over the fact that he apparently can read your mind. “Bare minimum is like, making sure I’m not alone with him, not getting your friends together to scare him off and break his foot.”

Jamie’s been kissing your skin wherever he can reach as you speak, so his words are interspersed with pecks. “Technically, the foot was an accident. Ask any one of our witnesses. And besides, they’re your friends too. You’re the one who got ‘em all to like ya despite the fact we’re mortal enemies on the pitch.”

“You’re the one who goes tanning with Jack,” you remind him.

“Lies told by the press,” Jamie grumbles. “This is my natural sexy glow.”

You say, “Okay little British boy,” as Jamie decides that his current position is not enough and he wants to lay on top of you.

He says something but his face is buried in the crook of your neck, so all you can feel is vibrations.

You ask, “Hm?” so he lifts his head.

“What if it were us next year?”

“Tanning or breaking feet?”

“Getting married.”

Jamie goes back to having his mouth on your neck as if the air weren’t just punched from your lungs.

You’re quiet long enough that he lifts his head again to ask, “Is that good quiet or bad quiet?”

“Good!” you hastily confirm. “Good, but, babe- you haven’t even asked me yet.”

He says, “I’m going to,” as if you should have known already. 

“Okay,” you breathe, “can you give me like a little heads up or something so my nails are done?”

“Uh-huh,” he says, “At the end of the week. Been planning it. Ring’s in my bag, even asked Stella if she’d be pissed that it’s the same week she took on the most un-sexy last name in history. She said she don’t give a shit as long as it’s not at her actual wedding. So.”

“I love you,” you tell him. “Not just because of yesterday or right now. I just think you’re great.”

“I am great, babe,” he says like it’s obvious. “Picked you, didn’t I?”

You crack a smile. “Alright, that’s enough out of you. Do you want to get out of bed or go back to sleep?”

“Sleep,” he replies immediately. 

“Thank God,” you groan, “I didn’t want to move. You’re like a weighted blanket.”

“It’s me sexy muscles,” Jamie says. You wiggle under him to get more comfortable.

“Uh huh,” you agree, but the words are hardly out of your mouth before you’re both back to sleep.

[vacantgodling]

I think I missed something when I was sleeping, what's gofficka 👀 ?

ok so basically how all of this got started is my partner was watching a youtuber review a shitty dark academia romance book, and in listening i got incensed and was like dude i can definitely write something better than that! and then, very similarly to donut wip i ended up making a wip (who’s mc i really didn’t like at first and tbh i still don’t really like len like i wouldn’t be friends with her she annoys me. but i think she grows up ok lmao i mean she has to pff) and managed to make something that kind of interests me enough to try writing.

and i also wanted an excuse to try out the snowflake method of story writing/planning cuz i saw it floating around and tbh why not? why not just do a thing lol. but anyway! haha have an actual summary. like, a real one lmao:

Lennon Rhapsody Granger (17) is sent to a private prep institute for troubled youth after she gets expelled from school for the fifth time. There, she meets and becomes romantically involved with bad boy heartthrob Aurora O’Rion (18). Aurora is a lackey of a group called The Centurion, who do not take kindly to outsiders being so close to their secrets. Aurora is ordered to kill Lennon, and nearly succeeds—but foregoes the final blow to try and save her life. He hides Lennon with his best friend Morrigan (18), who works for the same organization, and together they try to get a presumed-dead Lennon away from The Centurion before they discover that she’s still alive.

and so like aside from the summary, have a “gist of” explanation lmao

basically the things that i’m drawing from with this wip (nicknamed gofficka LMAO) is

dark academia (it’s set at a prep school, there’s the usual tropes of secret societies, bad boy love interests etc)

gothic romance (the twisted romance angle)

the YA genre (this story is very unintentionally inspired by twilight 💀)

erotica (bc why not)

however some notes on that. firstly being, in YA romance similar to twilight, the mc girl character is supposed to be a self insert for the reader and i want to start the story giving it that vibe, however about halfway through when the Big Shift happens, i’m gonna be veering down a road where 1. len very obviously has her own personality 2. she’s not really a good person (bc a lot of these mcs, BELLA ESPECIALLY, are very shite tbh but everyone regards them as some perfect angel somehow? don’t get it) and most importantly 3. she’s going to be called out on that. especially by morrigan lmao.

also, the “love triangle” (it’s really a love angle but whatever) in these stories is usually centered around the main girl and len has the same assumption too, however it’s revealed that the love angle’s central spoke is around aurora, not len. morrigan is gay, and tbh he’s my lowkey favorite pfff but aurora and len are growing on me. anyway tho he provides a shock of clarity for the narrative, imo—that wanting to love and forcing it isn’t what love is (to me). that there’s more to it than just being attracted to someone, which tbh a lot of YAs just kind of think is close enough. there’s no real chemistry and no attempt to show the complexities of actually genuinely loving someone. sO yeah.

also, the bad boy, aurora? he’s actually bad lol. he almost kills len pff and len having and dealing with ptsd surrounding that situation is also a thing. him being put into a position where most YAs would have him chose the love interest i decided to make him choose something else. because a new love isn’t going to be that strong and that’s the whole point to me??? that love alone isn’t going to solve all these crazy problems. it can contribute to fixing them and becoming strong but idk everything is more complex than that.

i have a lot of feelings about the complexities of romantic love and i hate when it’s cheap so i’m gonna make it. uhhhh not that.

but anyway the actual organization isn’t the point of this story. my brain WANTS me to make a sequel after this book just so i can explore the three of them in a pretty properly functioning polycule where there’s spokes and not full angles but we’ll have to see pffff

[kirider]

VVV obligatory read more bc it's long VVV

💡

First toku oc! They were based on the Transteam suits (bc Stalk's suit is still one of my favorites) but I'm trying to redesign them to be more generic. They don't have a plot yet and probably won't have one ever, I do have a characterization for them but they're mainly just a lil guy hanging around for fun. Their animal is a sea angel, they work mainly as support or distraction, and are terrible at close range combat. They're the only one with half a name, "Bright", bc their suit can light up and one of their main gadgets is floating sea angel robots that can light up spaces or work as flashbangs

💻

Ex-aid oc, bc I started the series and loved the concept too much that I had to. They're mainly mainly a videogame modder and dataminer, if they had to be inserted in the plot they would help Kiriya with his investigation via internet before his death (just by investigating the game data that Kiriya sent them, without knowing the full picture), and coming to investigate in person and getting involved directly after they didn't hear from Kiriya for a while. Their gashat is inspired by collectatons (so less combat focus, but they have access to a special inventory/pocket dimension ), and detective games/point and click for the level up. Their gashat also would either come from a cancelled game or something, that they patched together from various datamines

🐕🦎🦚

DGP trio, I needed background character for a fic, ended up getting attached and now they have a personality and are part of the plot. Their game is set in 2010, Geats is also there bc when I started the story I still thought we were going with immortal Ace. The Dog is the obligatory rival for Ace and work in an restaurant, his theme is mainly based on Laelaps, bc of dog and fox; the Lizard is a sweetheart and I love her, lizard helmet bc I thought the logo looked cool; the Peacock is an athlete (in my defense I made her before Lobo i couldn't have known lol) and never turns down a challenge, peacock helmet bc this was a ooo crossover and I wanted one of the riders to have one of Ankh's animals for absolutely no reason cmon I had to :P

🩰

...she only exists bc I like Sieg and I was sad after he left the first time, I wanted to give him a friend in the past. She's a dance student bc of the Swan Lake theme Sieg has, I've also been calling her Odette but it's very much a placeholder name. I have different headcanons for Sieg after seeing the other episodes/movies he's in, so I haven't been using her much.

🐈‍⬛

Other character that exists only for plot reasons, I have no excuse lol. He's for a Den-O × Revice hypothetical crossover bc of various headcanons I have for Imajins and Inner Demons. That's it that's all. His design is very much still a placeholder, the only concrete thing about him for now is that he's based on a black cat, i tried to give him a punk-ish outfit (ripped striped sweater, ripped black pants, boots) but I don't think it shows, especially in a chibi. Scarf is supposed to have the colors of the imajins on the lines

✧Kamen Rider Arcana✧

Fanseries that me and @margarita-is-the-answer are playing around with, theme is tarots, stars and destiny. The main four are Arcana/the Fool, fluffy sunshine boy; Emperor, veteran rider and victim of the "I have to be the strongest rider" arc; Magician, local SillyMan with secondary motives; and Hanged Man, designated redemption arc haver. The weapons are very much still not defined, pls ignore them.

🌺Flower Sentai Something /j🌺

I'm kidding they haven't a name yet, I've been calling them flower sentai but it's clearly only a placeholder. Flower themed group as if you couldn't tell, they were a group project but I ended up adopting all of them. Don't have a plot yet, just that the theme of the enemies would be based on fairies and other folklore tales. The main base is a flower shop/greenhouse owned by Red's family; Orange is a fae creature (she turns into a cat) and the one that handed them the transforming devices; White is the sixth ranger and they're not allowed near the plants, they will kill every plant they touch. The others have a general characterization but not much yet. There's no Blue bc there's no braincells in this team (don't let the slight blue tint know White trick you they don't know what they're doing either). There's a Violet Dark Ranger who's plot is connected to Orange but I haven't designed her yet.

[29/07/2023]

I got one (1) comment asking for my ocs so woe, lil' guys be upon you (blame Si /j)

I was just trying to count them, I didn't realize how many I have. It's not even all of them, skipped the ones that don't have a design yet (I have at least two more sentais, and a bunch of villain monsters bc of story reasons). That has to be too many.

Emotes next to them are the tags I use for them, since none of yet have a name yet (I am bad at naming rip me o|-( )

Mini ramblings about them in the reblog (for organization reasons)

[ameliora-j]

not rly expecting anyone to see this bc it’s so late but anyways poly!rarry angst to break your hearts :) all hurt no comfort [PART 2]

today was a good day. everything was going perfectly, and you hadn’t been a brat since ron and harry set you straight about two weeks ago. everything was going great. you were hanging out with ron, harry, and hermione in hogsmeade for the day and it was all around just a good time.

until ron and harry went to grab the food at the three broomsticks and left you and hermione sitting at the table. she never did like you. she claimed that you stole ron away from her and you were selfish because you had harry already. but that just isn’t true… harry asked if it was okay that ron joined because he had a crush on you, and you didn’t mind. you would do anything to make your harry happy. 

when your boys left, hermione had a go at you. called you stupid. slut shamed you. any mean name in the book you could think, she said it. and once ron returned, you murmured something along the lines of having to use the bathroom and snuck away. hiding in the bathroom where you released all of your emotions in the form of tears. 

when you returned, the air in the group changed. ron looked pissed, hermione looked like she had been crying, and harry just looked confused. you sat beside harry and looked down at the table as you rolled your eyes. you already knew what happened. she had fed ron lies about you, attempting to drive a wedge in your relationship. you knew she hadn’t told harry because you already told harry what she did to you. but ron wouldn’t believe you he thought hermione was an angel. 

you let out a sigh and intertwined your hand with harry’s. “you okay bubba?” he whispered. 

“later,” you murmured into his shoulder. harry left it at that, pressing a gentle kiss you your head and returning back to the conversation with ron and hermione. 

you planned on talking to harry as soon as you got back to hogwarts. truly, you did. but suddenly he was being pulled away by the weasley twins and ron was dragging you up to the dorm. you made no room to protest when ron got you in the dorm and locked the door. not even when he looked at you and asked what had gotten into you. or when he told you that your behavior was unacceptable and you couldn’t speak to hermione that way. you just shrugged indifferently and kept your gaze trained on the floor.

ron pulled you over his lap and pulled off your skirt and panties and that was the only warning that you got before ron began to lay into you with his belt. you held in your sobs but you couldn’t stop the tears from flowing down your face as you tightly fisted the sheets in your hand. ron was nice enough, and so you only got forty. it was only supposed to be twenty, but he started over anytime you stuttered, messed up, or forgot one. 

your head had been floating since around the tenth one, but you didn’t feel light or happy. you felt sad. broken and dejected… like a worthless object that ron only used to punish when he was angry. you registered him doing his routine aftercare, but you didn’t feel the love behind it. you felt numb as he rubbed the cream on your bottom and sat in the bathtub with you. the tears were still flowing down your face silently as you curled into yourself while he gently washed you off. “stop crying dove,” ron whispered. “it’s okay,” he kissed your head gently, and you only returned his words with a nod before reaching up and rubbing your eyes, forcing your tears to stop. 

“sorry,” you whispered with a quiet sniffle. 

“y’know you’re gonna have to apologize to hermione, right?” he asked. you only nodded as he drained the tub. “what do you want to wear?” he asked.

“i can dress myself thank you,” you whispered as you kneeled in front of harry’s trunk “i’ll see you downstairs.” he nodded and pressed a kiss to the back of your head before going down to the common room. once he was gone, you really let the sobs take over.

they were loud and heart wrenching as you released akk the emotions that you held in during your punishment. you went silent the second you heard the door open. quickly, you wiped your eyes roughly and pulled on one of harry’s shirts along with a pair of panties and a pair of shorts that you had in his trunk. “bubba?” harry’s voice asked quietly.

“hi hazzie,” you murmured monotonously. 

“hi baby. you wanna tell me what happened today?” he asked.

“no thanks. can i just have a hug please?” you whispered. harry pouted and kneeled on the floor in front of you.

“you can always have a hug my love,” he kissed your head gently as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and laid on his chest. 

“hazzie?” you murmured softly into his neck. 

“yes bubba?” he whispered as he rubbed your back.

“i don’t… want this anymore,” you whispered with a sniffle.

“you don’t want what angel?” he asked confused.

“um… us. me and you a-and ron… i don’t… i don’t want it,” you murmured.

“angel… are you breaking up with us?” he asked.

“yeah…” you whispered, voice breaking “yeah i am. i’m um… i’m sorry but… can you tell ron? i… i don’t want to look at him again,” you sniffled as you stood from your place knelt in front of him. you bent down and kissed his head before turning and walking out of the dorm. you kept your head down as you passed ron sitting with all his friends, bragging about how he’d just punished you, only working to break your heart even more, and prove to you that you’d made the correct decision. 

you went back to your own dorm and buried yourself under your covers. cuddling into the teddy bear harry got you as you used your wand to lock your door and put a protection charm on it, as you stared at the wall. you didn’t want to feel anymore, no actually… you couldn’t feel anymore. you were uncomfortably numb.

the only thing that you registered was the pain blooming in your backside and the hole that felt as though it had been ripped right out of your chest. you loved ron weasley… probably more than you should’ve… but you couldn’t keep letting him hurt you by taking hermione granger’s side over and over again. and punishing you before even listening to your side of it. 

so there you laid, dejected and heartbroken, wishing with all your might that the tears would just stop. that the pain would go away and you’d stop caring about ron and harry as much as you did. but you knew that you couldn’t… life didn’t work that way. and somehow… it’s always the things we love most that end up breaking us the hardest.

[asterlark]

ok. samwell college of music au. i wrote all four years let's go babey

eric bittle is this lovely southern tenor (sounds kinda like mitch grassi or ben j pierce) who posts covers (& sometimes originals, but always with neutral or no pronouns because he can't post anything that says he or him ☹) on his youtube channel and has major stage fright but is very talented; he also plays ukulele

he got into samwell college of music on a voice scholarship and his dad doesn’t exactly approve but eric was never the 6′2″ masculine football player he wanted anyway so why not go for his dreams

he auditions for the very competitive samwell men’s contemporary chorus (there’s like 20 choirs; chamber choir, jazz choir, a cappella groups (lax bros do a cappella), combined choirs, etc- smcc does contemporary pop/rock music) and while he’s very very nervous and shaky as he auditions, directors hall & murray see a lot of potential in him (with major grumbling from student director jack)

(the rest of this ridiculously long au under the cut)

the group is small, for a chorus, because the point of the group is not a wall of sound but a focus on all of the very talented guys’ voices coming together in these gorgeous harmonies and basically they’re like one of the best choruses on campus and all the male singers want in

so there’s jack zimmermann, who of course eric knows because everyone knows who he is, he’s the son of bob and alicia zimmermann, both incredibly talented and famous musicians, and basically those genes were in his favor because he’s mega fucking talented

(jack was supposed to sign a recording contract to be in a band with his best friend kent parson when he was 17 but something happened between them and the pressure was too much and jack overdosed on something- there’s so many rumors no one knows what’s real- and kent signed solo in LA & went on to win grammys for his albums about a mysterious ex and jack disappeared for a few years to be a counselor at a music camp and reappears at samwell, knocking everyone’s socks off again like he’d never left, except with a renewed vigor and intenseness that freaks everyone out)

jack is a contemporary writing & production major, freaky talented and sings like a modern day frank sinatra, and he plays like 20 instruments and can read music like breathing air and writes songs like if he stopped he’d die; his music is folksy and mournful and he plays all the instruments on his tracks himself- guitar, piano, strings, drums- it sounds like a full band but nope. just jack. he’s intense

“we all get nicknames in this choir,” justin informs eric on his first day, “we’re those kinda guys.” so he’s bitty, which he finds vaguely offensive (bc he’s not that short!) but still cute, & the rest of the group is introduced to him:

“shitty” knight (voice like colyer) is a musical education major and an enigma of a singer with this awesome, earthy, raspy voice that’s really interesting to listen to and a very.... unique style & look; he writes cheesy but shockingly good raps about social justice topics and he will sing-lecture you if you’ve said something offensive (he also plays banjo)

justin “ransom” oluransi is a music business & management major with an angelic voice you can’t help but listen to; he’s sultry and has an incredible range and does runs like nobody’s business (with a voice like daniel caesar or leslie odom jr UGH)

adam “holster” birkholtz is a voice performance major, wants to be on broadway and it’s all he ever goddamn talks about basically, he’s a belter and has a lot of charisma and starpower and he’ll charm the pants off of you within one note; can also play piano and irritates everyone constantly because his regular volume is like a level 11 (voice like the frontman of my brothers and i combined w/ x ambassadors lead singer)

larissa “lardo” duan is at the local art institute because performing arts is not her jam and she’d much rather paint; she’s a barista at annie’s and supervises open mic nights and keeps the annoying choir dudes from driving away all her patrons

“i’m not even in your dumbass choir,” she says when the group gave her her nickname. holster just told her that she was an honorary member and then started sing-shouting a song at her about how good she is

bitty’s first year is hard because he’s talented and he works hard but he shies away when anyone asks him to sing outside the group and like, he can sing to a camera by himself but being on a stage with everyone looking at you and the sole responsibility of the song on your shoulders is terrifying and no thanks

jack does not. understand this. he’s been performing practically since he came out of the womb and he doesn’t really get performance nerves (what he gets is anxiety about how he did after he gets off stage that follows him home and makes it so he can’t sleep) - so he bothers bitty about it constantly like “you just need practice, you just have to sing by yourself a lot and then you’ll get over it” which like.... that’s true but it’s also hella scary and bitty’s like “no thanks!!!!”

but jack’s annoying and intense so he makes bitty do open mic with him every saturday night and it’s going okay and bitty loves his choir and loves his school and these new friends he’s making and he finally feels comfortable enough to come out to them during his second term

then during their spring choral showcase at the end of his freshman year bitty has a solo and he’s worked really hard on it and he’s feeling good- okay he’s completely freaked out but he’s trying to feel good- but when he gets up on stage there’s so many people and the stage lights are so hot on his face and he flips out a little and maybe he passes out from anxiety and stress right on stage and it’s terrible and he’s so embarrassed and ashamed that he ruined their set at the showcase

of course jack blames himself because “we shouldn’t have given you a solo before you were ready, i misjudged it, i’m sorry” - and they all feel kinda bad bc holy fuck they didn’t know his stage fright was that bad like they didn’t know someone could pass out just by being anxious to sing

he practices all the time over the summer and goes to his local open mic at jack’s insistence and it actually helps a lot because instead of a sea of strangers judging him it’s a bunch of people he knows and they’re all smiling at him and when he finishes his song they cheer for him and it boosts his self-confidence a lot

his sophomore year they have three new members- chris ”chowder” chow (voice like ieuan), an excitable music education major with impressive rapping skills, derek "nursey" nurse (frank ocean or leon bridges type), a songwriting major who can also play violin and guitar, and will ”dex” poindexter (like tom west), a production & engineering major who tried out with chowder bc he needed moral support and didn't expect to get in but impressed the directors with his voice

the year’s going pretty good, bitty’s still pretty scared of singing alone but more confident now and the open mic nights with jack haven’t stopped, so he’s getting better. and one night they’re hanging out at annie’s after closing waiting for lardo to be done so they can walk her home, and bitty suggests that jack sing with him one of these nights, and jack says he doesn’t know any of bitty’s songs and bitty says they can write one together half jokingly but then jack is like “yes.” with that Intense Look

SO they get together a couple days later in jack’s room at the house they all live in together (bitty moved in at the beginning of the year after previous smcc member john johnson called him- how’d he get his number?- and told him he could take his room if he wanted), jack with his guitar and bitty with his ukulele, and it’s a little awkward until bitty says jack should play him one of his songs

and, okay, he doesn’t really know what to expect because the only music jack ever released to the public was that one single he did with kent parson when they were 17 so bitty doesn’t even know if he has anything to play him, but he does- he starts playing these soft, sad notes on the guitar and opens his mouth and sings about being lonely and scared and unsure, about false starts and shaky ground and not knowing where you stand with someone, about expectations and lying awake at night and wishing so hard you were someone else, and bitty watches him sing and just kind of... realizes he’s head over heels for this boy and internally Freaks Out a little

he tries to put that aside and they start to write this song, at first it’s weird because jack’s like “all your songs are love songs i can’t really relate to happy love songs” and bitty’s like “listen... i’ve never even had a boyfriend i just write a bunch of sappy love stuff because it’s not about me it’s about whoever’s listening to it, they’re gonna project their own experiences on my music anyway so it doesn’t matter if it’s my real life or not” and jack’s like “alright while fake af that’s smart and i respect you” (what bitty doesn't say is that he writes about what he really wants which is to fall in love & be in a happy relationship)

they say they’re just gonna write this kinda vague sad song but they both secretly write lines about their actual lives so it ends up being really personal and real and raw for the both of them

they sing the song at open mic that saturday and the crowd at annie’s is never that big but they’ve never got a standing ovation here before, and some girl shouts “MAKE AN ALBUM” (it may or may not be lardo) and they both blush furiously and bitty’s like “... that was really nice, jack” and jack’s like “... yeah it was good good job you’re really getting some confidence out there nice work” (bitty: “THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT AAAAH”)

around this time jack’s really thinking about what he’s gonna do when he’s done at samwell, talking with his parents and his agent and looking into different record companies and deciding if he wants to sign with anyone or possibly start his own company- the head of a small company called falcon records in rhode island has been talking to him a lot, and jack talks to bitty about how he thinks it’d be nice to start small, and the record exec georgia and the producer marty had both been really nice and welcoming, and bitty’s so happy for him but also just... sad that he won’t be around jack every day after he graduates

THEN at a haus party celebrating their win of a local choral competition, who shows up but none other than pop star kent parson to Ruin The Fun

bitty sees the way jack pales when kent walks in, notices them disappear upstairs together and feels a little sick worrying about jack but chalks it up to the highly alcoholic concoction shitty and lardo had cooked up but nonetheless decides he’s sick of the party and goes up to his room and hears.... a little too much

and YIKES he’s standing right there and kent parson, pop star, two-time grammy winner, is looking a little rumpled and staring right at him and he puts his hat on and clears his throat and snaps at jack- “hey. well. call me if you reconsider. but good luck with rhode island. ...i’m sure that’ll make your parents proud.” and jack’s shaking, and bitty doesn’t know what to do but jack goes back into his room and bitty’s just kind of standing there like What The Fuck

so.... he kind of stews over winter break but tries not to think about it too much and he and jack text a bit and jack tells him to practice and bitty’s like “oh, you” and jack’s like “im serious” and bitty’s like “>:( it’s christmas”

spring semester starts and they're doing well in competitions and they go to semifinals and then finals for a prestigious collegiate choir competition and the pressure is mounting but they all are so optimistic and really feel like they're on the same page and bitty’s confidence is better than ever and then.... they don't win

jack especially takes it very hard, but then he also has signing to worry about, which everyone helps him with and he decides to sign with falcon records and start work on an album after graduation

speaking of graduation, shitty and jack graduate and it's hard for them but harder for bitty who feels like he's losing jack in a way, he knows how intense jack gets when he's making music and it doesn't feel like he'll have any time for bitty anymore so when they say goodbye bitty goes back to the haus and listens to his and jack's song and just cries

but, like in canon, dadbob has words of wisdom to impart and jack has an "oh" moment and races across campus to kiss bitty

they get together and the next few months are spent with jack working nonstop on his album (which tbh, he'd had many of the songs written already so it's mostly recording and producing) and texting bitty constantly and coming to visit him and playing him demos of all the songs

jack also asks bitty if they can record the song they wrote together & have it as a bonus track on his album & bitty says of course, so when jack visits they set up an impromptu studio and record vocals in the guest bedroom and this deeply personal song they wrote before they were ever together means so much more to them now

and bitty is so happy but so scared and sad too because jack is playing him these songs telling him "they're all for you bits, & a lot of them are about you" and he just doesn't know how he's going to keep all this love inside even though it feels like jack's career is at stake

he tries to shove it down and stay strong though, especially since he's now an upperclassman and they're taking on new members- connor "whiskey" whisk (voice like finneas or the male singer in valley), a music business/ management major who seems to hate bitty's guts and tony "tango" tangredi (like chaz cardigan), a jazz composition major who astounds everybody with his endless questions but also his ridiculously impressive composition skills & naturally perfect pitch (he can also play saxophone??)

i want ford in this au so fuck it she is a composition major with dreams to write scores for musicals and she stars training as a barista at annie's (aka training to corral the smcc)

the pressure of it all proves to be a lot and bitty and jack have their hi, honey moment where bitty's like i can't be this deep in the closet!!! and so they tell the smcc and also jack's label that they're together and that eases things a bit

jack's album comes out to much critical acclaim and shouting in the groupchat ("#1 ON ITUNES BRAHHHHH!!!!!!!!") and several months later, when smcc has already been eliminated from choral competition in an earlier round, jack is nominated for SEVERAL grammys including best album, song of the year, and best new artist

when the time comes he takes his parents and bitty on the red carpet which, everyone keeps being like "who are you here with jack?" and he's like "my family and my good friend :)" and yes it is awkward

jack wins... all three awards. it's the comeback everyone is stoked to see and when his third win is announced, he and bitty are so elated that they kiss before he goes to accept the award

his speech is basically just "um... wow. thank you. i just kissed my boyfriend on live tv. this is amazing and i'm so humbled. i'd like to thank my boyfriend and georgia and marty and my parents and my friends and my boyfriend"

obviously the press has a FIELD DAY with this but bitty & jack are honestly vibing and so happy that it doesn't matter untiiiillll bitty's mom calls and he has to tell her "mama i'm gay and i'm going on tour with jack this summer okloveyoubye"

the last few months of bitty's junior year pass quickly and he's voted student director which is a huge honor considering how much he struggled with stage fright and confidence & how he'll now be stepping into ransom & holster's shoes

r&h and lardo all graduate (the smcc basically crashes the art school graduation and all scream when lardo gets her diploma lmao), which is a bittersweet occasion and they all do a bit of tearing up

that summer bitty goes on tour across the u.s. & canada with jack and his touring band (snowy is a bassist, tater is a drummer and poots does backing guitar, he also brings nursey to play violin on a few songs) as well as georgia who's there to manage logistics

and tour is so fun & chaotic with many bi and rainbow flags in the audience that end up thrown on stage and draped around jack's neck and they spend so many nights in the bus drinking and laughing and fooling around on the guitars and bitty's uke and exploring new cities bitty has never been to before and it's the freest bitty has felt in a long time

summer ends though, and jack leaves for the uk/europe leg of the tour, and with the new school year brings a few new members- river "bully" bullard (voice like gregory alan isakov), a music therapy major who draws his own cover art for his songs, lukas "louis" landmann (like jr jr), an electronic production and design major with a penchant for EDM, and johnathan "hops" hopper (like keiynan lonsdale), a film scoring major who wants to write music for movies and video games

bitty meets and befriends some of the other student directors- shruti, sd of the women’s contemporary chorus; sharon, sd of the chamber choir; and edgar, sd of jazz ensemble (even chad l., sd of the all-male a cappella group)

senior year passes similarly to the comic; coach visits and sees one of bitty’s competitions, jack comes to madison for christmas, smcc does well in competition and goes to regionals etc

however… bitty keeps putting off and putting off gathering the songs for his senior recital

he has a hard time doing that because he’s so focused on the group and making sure they’re performing well and as they advance in competition, everything else starts to fall away

eventually the rest of the smcc has to lock away his uke and change his youtube password and FORCE him to choose songs for it and start preparing because he cannot graduate without doing this recital and doing well on it

he chooses (of course) a beyonce song, a few of his own songs, an ellie goulding song, and an adele song

with all that his breath hitches and his hands shake before he goes on stage, he does really well and his voice instructor prof atley tears up a little in the audience as does his mom

meanwhile smcc goes to semifinals, then finals, of the national collegiate choral competition they participate in

and i imagine bitty faces somewhat less homophobia in this au because i mean, he’s in the performing arts, but i think it’s still there and he also faces a good amount of classism from richer students and performers who think they’re better because they had the resources and money to be performing professionally from a very young age, and he has been practicing via filming himself on a shitty camcorder and posting it to youtube

but they still get there! and the national finals are fucking HUGE and a big deal and a little overwhelming

bitty’s stage fright is Present because this is the biggest stage and the biggest stakes he's ever had and he has a big solo in one of their songs so if he fucks up, he fucks up a national championship for his whole group and school

luckily though, when he steps on the stage with his best friends and sees his boyfriend and family and smcc alums in the audience and they perform their first song, a high-energy pop medley that always gets the crowd going, everything seems to melt away and it's just him living in this moment and singing his heart out

when it gets to the next song and his solo, he forgets to be nervous and belts it out, getting screams of approval from the audience when he finishes

(dex and nursey do have a duet together that they had to practice for many long nights in the practice rooms alone but that's neither here nor there)

their time on stage seems to last both hours and no time at all and then they're done, the crowd gives them a standing ovation and it's at least 30% r&h & shitty's hooting and hollering and jack's enthusiastic clapping that makes bitty & the others beam with pride

then it's just waiting, giddy and nervous beyond belief in their green room, for the judging to be over

after what feels like forever they're back on stage, arms linked together waiting and hoping for their name to be called and it is, they win and it feels like years have built up to this moment, and bitty tears up because years ago when he was fainting from anxiety at having to perform in front of people he never could've imagined that he'd do this, that he'd be the student director that led them to a championship

they get the trophy and a ridiculous amount of flowers from their loved ones and they all are just in giddy disbelief that this is happening, they're national champs!!! they are the best choir boys in the nation!!

they come home and the rest of the school year passes by so quickly that it's very suddenly graduation and bitty can't believe his college career at samwell is over 😢

(he and ollie and wicky take pictures together, o&w talk about how excited they are to devote full time attention to their band & wedding planning and bitty's just like wait you're gay??)

bitty got plenty of offers from record companies but he likes his freedom of creativity and he has a built in fanbase from doing youtube all these years so he decides to make an album independently (jack helps him produce & master it 🥰)

when bitty's album comes out about a year later, full of bops about being gay and in love and having struggled but come out the other side more confident than ever, it doesn't get any grammy nominations- and he didn't expect or need that.

what it does do is it resonates. it makes the rounds in youtube and queer internet circles; people his age reach out to him saying this is the music they wish they had as a kid and kids reach out to him saying he's a role model and they're so glad to have his music to listen to. his album is written about as an underrated gem that shines with queer brilliance and is sure to start a party when it comes on.

his parents may not fully understand the road he's chosen for himself but they're still so proud and promote the album as hard as any of his loyal fans (especially the one country-inspired song on the album that he wrote and dedicated to them).

and jack, jack who saw this album from its infancy to its release date, who took the film photo that ended up being the album cover, who worked with bitty to make sure his vision was realized exactly how he wanted it to be, is proud beyond words.

jack starts using his semi-abandoned twitter again to tweet "stream [album name]" every day and bitty retweets them sometimes, with just a "this boy. ❤"

and they're happy. they're good. they have come so far and they are reaping the rewards of all the hard work they put in to make the music that they truly love.

the end :)

[heezoneie]

Hello lovely! 💕 Hope you're having a good day!

Can I ask for a reaction from stray kids where they meet you at a fan meeting and are attracted to you?

Thank you so much and I like your blog!

hey babe! i’m having a great day, thanks for asking🥺! i’m glad you enjoy my blog, and i hope you enjoy this reaction! <3

group: stray kids

member: all

genre: fluff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chan:

• when you first walked up to Chan his breath immediately got caught in his chest.

• your bright smile never leaving his view for a second. he couldn’t believe his eyes.

• immediately when you reached the table he began to make conversation. “hii, what’s your name?” he said as he grasped your hands in his.

• “my name’s y/n” his heart began to beat a little faster at the sound of your voice. he has never reacted this way to a fan before.

• chan found himself getting flustered as you ranted about how good of a leader he is. “overall you are the most caring, loving, all round amazing person and leader there could be.”

• his cute dimple showed as he hid his face behind your hands that were still locked with his. he lifted his head and your eyes met with his comforting brown ones.

• “i know i’m technically not supposed to say this,” he began while eyeing the staff behind him, “but i think your super pretty, and i would like to meet you again.”

• your eyes widened at his statement. you’ve read about situations like this happening, but never in a million years did you think it would actually happen.

• chan leaned into your ear and whispered, “meet me outside after the meeting, i can’t wait to talk to you more.” with that he pulled away with a wink.

Minho:

• you had walked up the table while Minho had his back turned. when he turned back around, his eyes widened.

• “oh sorry, i didn’t mean to scare you..” you said sheepishly. minho.exe has stopped working he felt his heart soften at your voice.

• he smiled, “no no, it was my fault i should have been paying attention.” as you were handing him some plushies of his cats, you happen to accidentally drop one.

• ofc minho couldn’t pass up the opportunity to tease you. “mY cAts!! mY pReCioUs cAts!” he grabbed his heart dramatically.

• you quickly picked up the stuffed soonie, and handed it to him. “i can’t believe i just did that,” you muttered to yourself.

• (he’s totally whipped already, but who’s keeping track?)

• “i think you owe me now, after dropping my car of course” he panned. quirking an eyebrow, his statement puzzled you.

• “to replace the pain you’ve inflicted upon this stuffed soonie, i think you should come meet the real soonie and give him all the pets he deserves.”

• deciding to go along, you nodded your head, “ i definitely think i should, to apologize.” grabbing your phone from your hand, minho put in his address.

• “be there by 6, don’t be late.” he gave you a smirk and sent you down to meet the rest of the members.

Changbin:

• we are all aware how this man is a s o f t i e as soon as he saw you in the crowd his face would immediately light up.

• he could not keep his eyes off of you (lowkey jealous when you were talking to the other members)

• but oh boy, as soon as you reached him, he would turn into a big baby, and probably tease you about not coming to him first. not like you had a choice

• he would grab your hands and pretend cry into them, which made your face turn bright red. this man knows what he’s doing to you btw.

• he would be so smiley, and makes sure to show off his famous aegyo, bc he wants to to fall for him

:((( even though you already have smh

• binnie would 100% make sure to somehow give you his number and meet up afterwards, bc he’s totally not in love or anything

Hyunjin:

• i got a little carried away with hyun’s😅

• our drama king

• ofc when his eyes found you, his jaw dropped, i mean physical fell

• his eyes followed you everywhere. he looked like this: 👀🙀 he definitely tried to convince chan to switch places with him so he could talk to you first

• when chan said no, he went 😠😠😔

•pouty baby bc he just wanted to talk you first:(((

• when you finally got to him, he flashed his always amazing eye smile. you noticed he had some makeup covering his mole under his eye, and you told him about how much you loved it.

• he:(((( wiped:(((( off:(((( the:(((( makeup:((((

• like when felix did it to his freckles in that one interview? yeah that’s what hyunjin did

• he is also a lowkey highkey flirt with you, constantly touching your hair, hands, face, basically anything he can within reason

• he got so sad when you had to leave, almost to the point where he got so caught up in pouting that he nearly forgot to ask for your number till you were already walking away.

• this boy did not care if anybody else saw, or what the staff was gonna say. he jumped out of his chair and quickly ran to you.

• gaining your attention, he grabbed your wrist and pulled you out of sight of all the other impatient stays wanting to see their precious hyunjin.

• that’s where he asked for your number, and went on a little rant about how he’s sorry he made a scene.

• it’s safe to say you guys went for food right after the fan sign

Jisung:

• when he saw you walk in, he knew. like he KNEW that he wanted to talk to you, hang out with you, etc.

• so so incredibly hyper when you got to talk to him

• this boy would be so goofy with you, grabbing your hands and flailing them around. it would just be him wanting to make you laugh :((

•jisung swore could swear that when he made you laugh for the first time, angels descended from the heavens.

• he didn’t want to stop talking with you, he just wanted to take you back to dorm right then and there, and just hang.

• you best bet this boy talked to you until finally the staff had to intervene to get the line moving again. he handed you a piece of paper, and told you to wait until you got out of line to open it.

• once you finished going through the line, you found a empty area near the exit and opened the little piece of paper.

• wrote in a messy scribe from writing fast, the paper said “meet me behind the building @ 4, if anybody bugs you tell them your with me. ;)”

Felix:

• he saw you as soon as the fan sign started he basically started bouncing in his seat. (yk the vibrating thing he does? he did that out of happiness.)

• lix would watch you interact with the other members with the biggest smile on his face.

• he would admire all the little mannerisms or quirks/habits you have while making conversations. he just watches with big doe eyes full of admiration.

• he knew he n e e d e d to talk to you. when you got to him, he was so excited and giddy.

• this boy just looked at you with wonder as you talked. he would listen to you talk and laugh all day if he could.

• he thinks you are the most adorable thing to ever walk the earth. he just wants to bundle you up and feed you brownies and cake :((( (someone pls find me a felix)

• when he realized time was up, and he was gonna have to let you go, he got so sad. but was he gonna let you go? no, no he was not.

• felix quickly grabbed a stuffed bear from behind him and wrote his number on its little bow.

• as he handed you the bear he said, “pls call me, i want to see you again.🥺”

Seungmin:

• bby seungminnie

• okay, i feel seungmin would be the best at hiding the fact that he is 100% simping for you even though he just met you 5 seconds ago.

• he would act normal, but on the inside be a complete mushy gushy mess, crying over how adorable and cute you are.

• secretly, would be cherishing the way your hand fit in his perfectly, and the way he never wanted to let go :(((((

• he would look at you with the most adorable eyes ever. he would definitely give you the sweetest most softest smile ever.

• his eyes got so sad when you told him you had to move on to the member bc other stays were becoming impatient :(

• he discreetly put his phone number in your phone, and made sure to tell you to text him asap :(

• i want a seungmin.

Jeongin:

• bbys eyes would be literally this “🥺” when he saw you.

• he was immediately so taken back and needed a minute to compose himself before he ran up to you himself.

• when you were talking to him, he would give you the biggest most cheesey smile ever. he was just so happy to be talking to you.

• he was already falling for the way you talked, acted, looked, just everything about you.

• he would hold your hands so tight, never wanting to let you go. his eyes wouldn’t leave yours for a second, not even when the staff tried to talk to him.

• when he finally decided to listen to the staff telling him to wrap up the conversation, he made sure to tel you to meet him after the fan sign

• and who were you to pass up and opportunity like that?

• he was so happy when he saw you show up after, bby couldn’t stop smiling the whole day. :((

[rinisbowen]

kyla talks about the season 3 trailer time... 

okay, let’s go. i just made a smaller post about the two things in the instagram trailer that i didn’t see in the main one, but if i missed something, i apologize in advance haha. 

i went through literally the whole thing- just less intensely than the season 2 trailer when i wrote it down the other day. still can’t believe we actually got the trailer today lowkey... 

i guess i’ll go in chronological order bc idk how best to go about this

ej picks up gina last (presumably with ashlyn, but who knows), and he’s driving their little group (carlos, kourtney, gina, ashlyn, and ej himself), in his little blue car. different car than season 1, but y’know. changed locations so they needed a new vehicle for him. it makes sense. 

ej’s so excited to take everyone to camp because it means a lot to him (instagram trailer) and like- love and friendship, go wildcats, etc. everyone else in that car is excited to go to camp because there’s a secret celebrity. who we already know is corbin bleu. 

when they all walk into camp and they blur that section on the side... i know that’s the pool area, and i’m going to go ahead and assume it’s so we don’t know there is a pool so we don’t conflate nini being in front of a pool with nini being at camp (nini’s definitely at camp in that shot where she’s in front of the pool, it’s definitely the same pool). they don’t want us to know she’s visiting. mark my words- she will. 

it’s VERY interesting that they frame maddox’s greeting everyone with the clip of ricky looking with interest at someone (or something i suppose)... and the shot of maddox that comes before the shot of ricky is from a different day than the “welcome folks” voiceover is from... ricky’s blue shirt in this shot is from episode 2 i’m pretty sure, idk about saylor’s dark grey shirt with the hot pink undershirt yet. maybe they’ll be from the same moment, but really- we don’t know. it’s just interesting that they’re cut together there, even if it’s not the same scene. might be, might not be.

and then we get maddox where her dialogue is actually from. episode 1, collecting phones, snacks, and electronics. maddox’s badge labels her a CIT and not a counselor. kourtney suffers having to give up her phone, which is apparently named sasha. (i would not be surprised if carlos turns in a phone but also brings a secret phone, i’m shocked the show would give up the facetime call mechanic, but at a summer camp it does make sense.)

they introduce corbin and frozen, we’ve all seen the sneak peek, this is a shorter section of that from episode 1. i don’t think i need to say anything there.

we see gina dancing on stage in a gold outfit- that should be fun

nini shows up at miss jenn’s door saying “surprise”- i know it’s 100% miss jenn by her pink sweater. she’s got a parasol and a massive sunhat. as a side note, her outfits in the trailer are way more nini than that solo promo photo which i appreciate. 

more on stage dancing, this time featuring corbin and people in gold and white basketball uniforms. my guess? showing off for his glory days in hsm. 

ej with gina from episode 1 when they’re arriving at camp- “best summer ever”. this boy is so excited and i love that for him truly. 

ricky throwing his arms up standing on some stumps on the edge of a cliff, overlooking what i’d assume is meant to be los angeles, (camp’s in california, but we don’t know where in california), standing next to big red’s orange car. (lowkey very curious about all this- but i think he’s likely going to sing a solo out here, just a matter of what the song is)

the summer camp car crew in the car- doing carpool karaoke to what time is it. shocker. then it turns to them taking selfies in front of the camp shallow lake sign. 

we’re 47 seconds in now, gina’s delivering a talking head. “it’s my first camp”- 

transitions to her in the cabin with ashlyn and kourtney also in episode 1, “should we spread out our bed assignments or do the new girl cluster”. (gina’s both super familiar with being new to things/places, and has never been to camp. shall be an interesting mix of feelings there). 

“my first boyfriend”-

transitions to her and ej on day 1, he kisses her, and presumably goes off to do counselor stuff (side note: we’ve only ever had a kiss in a trailer and it was between ej and nini in season 1. rini didn’t get one in either season, and neither has any other couple), carlos says “it’s just hitting me now that you two are gonna be a thing all summer”, he looks disgusted, gina looks flustered and all cutesy. it’s her first boyfriend. (i honestly don’t blame people for thinking this is not actually a good sign for them. it’s lowkey giving ‘i’m never breaking up with nini ever again’, rip rini)

“my first time really going out for the lead in a show”

i would like to start out by calling bs on that, but oh well. let’s continue... it shows gina auditionin on stage from episode 2. she looks happy and cute. 

okay- out of the talking head segment. we get the exterior of ‘the barn’ established 1978. so not just a family owned theatre camp, but one that’s been around a good while. 

everyone comes in, val announces “it’s time to introduce you to, your director”... the camera focuses on carlos, kourtney, gina, and ashlyn

transition to the sports day type scene where they’re doing some sort of big group song and dance number, color war thing. val’s cute she’s wearing both colors, the others are on teams with wearing one color. 

more dancing, but from episode 1, the car group, out of and then back in the car, THEN

val finishes her line- “ej caswell!” EJ IS DIRECTING FROZEN. he looks nervous and excited, the campers don’t visually react a ton besides gina who looks happy for him as she claps a little and ashlyn seems to start to clap too. (honestly- this might be the biggest reveal of the whole trailer i’m ngl. or at least the one with the most implications for the greater storyline. like there were other things that were definitely surprises, but didn’t have the same weight on the bigger story as a whole.) i have a LOT of thoughts here, we can talk about it later in another post if y’all would like. only one of which is the fact that that’s DEFINITELY a conflict of interest when he’s making casting decisions. 

scene changes to another episode, maybe episode 3 or 4? idk. gina’s in a red top and a red and white headband and ej’s wearing a deep blue camo athletic hoodie. ej: “just freaking out a little bit”, gina looks at him awestruck and idk if she’s concerned, confused, scared, or all of the above. 

shift to carlos and the others (ej, gina, ashlyn, kourtney) around a campfire from that same camo hoodie episode. ej is holding a guitar. YEAH- EJ. is playing the guitar.  carlos says “shake that money maker caswell”. kourtney visibly shimmies, carlos sort of does. (this was certainly a moment.)

we hear start the party (from camp rock) start to play in the background, as ricky dances with an air guitar type of move on that cliff overlooking la from before. i think he’s doing a solo out there, what it is, goodness knows. but yeah. 

we see jett for the first time, singing something holding a script in the barn in front of a little wooden table.

corbin basketball number returns.

carlos is steaming his vocal chords in the cabin with ricky. this whole scene with carlos and ricky is from episode 2. carlos: “i cannot focus on anything but auditions right now” ricky: “what are the two main guys’ names in frozen again?” carlos looks at him judgmentally, bc how the heck... disney- ricky like everyone else would’ve been inundated with frozen, i’m sorry this is just unrealistic. ricky: “one is... i wanna say... gary?” carlos, shaking his head: “none of them are gary...” ricky looks sort of worn out, laying back on the bed. carlos: “you can’t just zefron your way through auditions this time” 

it seems he takes this to heart, given in the next shot he’s on stage auditioning in like- a snow suit i’d call it. some have said perhaps he’s channelling kristoff. idek what i’d say. then we see visuals of kourtney, carlos, then ashlyn, auditioning, like we saw gina doing earlier. this is all episode 2, like i said before. they’re probably going to show the kids all singing bits from the same song, like montage style similar to belle. 

then we see nini again- playing her guitar this time. i’m pretty sure this is the same outfit from the pool clip we see later, but who knows. the v.o. is done by marvin, nini’s family friend, who says “i promise you, the best is yet to come”. he finishes the quote on screen, talking to nini.

then it changes to ashlyn, gina, and kourtney hugging in their cabin on day 1, more car gang carpool karaoke vibes, then gina dancing on stage in the gold (or green, but it’s shiny) outfit again. suffice it to say gina’s dancing a lot- good for her, bc that’s where she shines. 

we change to ashlyn and kourtney saying “scream!” excitedly. from the glimpse at channing’s yellow shirt, we know this is from the episode titled “no drama,” from the corbin still, from the glimpse at ricky’s blue and orange shirt behind the girls, we know it’s the same episode as the gina and ricky giggling and ej potentially being jealous scene.

then we get jojo siwa aka madison with maddox at the camp prom! this is from the aptly titled episode, camp prom. seventies themed dance. we see madison and maddox slow dancing together in the middle of the room, and for y’all who love seb and seblos, he and carlos are singing with one other person on the stage in the back if you look closely. madison says “sup wildcats” in the close up of her and maddox coming in, and then the image changes to carlos looking super excited. it’s definitely from the same episode from his outfit, but idk why he’s so thrilled to see maddox’s love interest. i’m sure we’ll find out later, otherwise it could be a misleading editing choice. 

corbin in his black jacket comes into the barn trailed by channing in the yellow shirt. this is from the ‘no drama’ episode, but i’ll bet this is what they’re pretending carlos is gasping about

nini’s voice over starts over the last clip, but now we see her talking to miss jenn (from the scene i mentioned towards the beginning, her outfit is the same and again we can see miss jenn’s pink sweater) nini: “it feels like these last few years have been leading up to something big...” we see miss jenn on screen smiling at her as she talks. 

transition back to camp, ej talking to gina in episode 1 in the evening, it’s dark, he’s in the jacket from the sneak peak, “nothing is gonna ruin our perfect summer together”. this is intercut with a visual of gina and ricky fussing over a piece of notebook paper gina steals from him and he tries to steal back, they’re giggling and having a good time, but the focus quickly shifts onto ej who is very much noticing and does not look at all pleased. jealousy... could be interesting. (this is from the episode “no drama”). tbh even just the quote itself doesn’t bode well, again if we look at it next to ‘i’m never breaking up with nini ever again’, and the fact that their sweet moments in the trailer are all pretty much from the one first episode. but i mean time will tell... 

intros of notable guests (aka corbin bleu, jojo siwa (as madison), jesse tyler ferguson (as marvin), and meg donnelly, listed as “zombies star, meg donnelly” (as val), and then “and our wildcats”. 

we see the earlier campfire scene, with carlos, ashlyn, kourtney, and gina wrapped up in blankets, then- gina and kourtney together from “no drama” in gina’s red floral dress, they seem happy, ej giving an auditioner a thumbs up in episode 2 (could be gina or ashlyn, or a particularly nervous auditioner, though he looks fond, so idk)

carlos and kourtney in pajamas outside from early morning, episode 2 (based on these being the same pajamas he has on with ricky in the cabin)

then a quick moment of ricky in his snow suit (presumably watching someone audition, a bit awestruck)

nini at the POOL- aka nini at CAMP. (my rini heart was lighting up when i saw nini at the pool... especially bc it looks like that might be the scene with her guitar... that pool is DEFINITELY at camp, particularly bc they went out of their way to blur the pool at camp when the group was walking in. ricky and nini proper goodbye moment- perhaps featuring nini playing him the song she wrote or them singing some sort of duet...  their last goodbye? we shall see.)

ashlyn, in the girls cabin in pajamas, morning of episode 2. “one could say the stakes have never been higher”

then we get some clips quickly flashing by, maddox with her polaroid camera, seemingly taking a photo of a posing ashlyn, jett winning the color sports day thing and raising a golden oar over his head, nini blowing a kiss and waving as she leaves presumably also miss jenn’s house, a spotlight shining on miss jenn as she stands presumably in camp spinning around, 

camera back on ashlyn but a wider shot, we see gina making her bed maybe, and kourtney under on her bunk as ashlyn sits atop hers, hand raised, “and one will- the stakes have never been higher”

--

a few quick notes, but i’ll talk more later if anyone’s curious about anything

i think they’re purposely hiding something about ricky’s storyline this season. what that is- no idea. but they definitely are. he doesn’t have enough screen time in this trailer for him being first billed and being literally front and center on the poster. (maybe he’s the bi character, but it could also easily be something else entirely.) i just know they’re trying to avoid telling us something, but i have no clue what that could be. if anyone has ideas- feel free to pop in my askbox... 

madison (jojo siwa’s character) and maddox seem to be romantically involved which is fantastic to see. i’m curious to see if maddox is the promised bi character or if maddox is out however she identifies, and leads someone else to sort of... go on that journey. i do hope it’s the latter and i think it would be fun if it were ashlyn. 

jesse who plays marvin said on his instagram story he’s only in the season for about 7 minutes. obviously this is an estimate on his part, but it’s something interesting to think about in terms of nini’s screentime and what her story looks like. he also said he shot his stuff seven months ago, so like- the VERY beginning of january probably, maybe even in december. so olivia was definitely taping her stuff separately due to her schedule... at least separate from the main cast, bc obviously she shot with kate and jesse, and maybe some others individually, we don’t know yet. 

[we-are-inevitable]

Aight so you should write something of Jack and Race just straight up Vibing. I do not care what era, what au, whatever. Just some quality Jack and Race chaotic vibes if you please. Have the greatest night ever! Oh my gosh wait what if then Spot and Davey find out that the boys are being Dumbasses. That'd be funny. Anyway im tired and you should have seen all of the typos i made typing this now we should both go use the sleep.

A/N: this was SO much fun thank you oh my GOD,, it's been a hot minute since i've written anything for canon era but i rlly liked this <3 no period-typical homophobia bc i said so

Read On AO3!

***

“You are such a damn idiot,” Racetrack says as he smacks the back of Jack’s head.

And, okay, Jack knows he is, but Race didn’t have to say it.

“Can ya shut up about it?” Jack asks with a deep frown, shrugging the blond’s arm off from around his shoulders. “I already kickin’ myself; I don’t need’a hear it from you, too!”

“I can’t believe it,” Racer laughs, and throws his arms up. “Ya just lost your shot with Davey!”

“Did not!”

“Ya called him ‘angel’ in front of tha boys,” Racer sneers, then leans his head back, laughing loudly. “Ya- ya just said it! No preamble!”

Jack storms down the street, but Racer follows closely behind, laughing like it’s the funniest thing in the whole goddamn world. It wasn’t anything bad- Jack had been selling with the boys, and they all figured that going to Jacobi’s would be nice; it was a hot summer day, afterall, and the lot of them haven’t been by in a while. With a little help from some of the older boys, like Race, Al, and Finch, Jack had gotten the chance to buy enough food for the group of ten or so newsies to share.

Including Les and, by extension, Davey.

Of course Davey was there. Why wouldn’t he be? Ever since the strike, Davey had been pretty well integrated into the group. Sure, he was still a little awkward at times, but he was respected.

And since he was respected, he was constantly with the boys.

And that’s supposed to be a good thing.

But not for Jack, because nothing ever goes right for Jack.

All Jack had said was “Get’cha some food, angel,” and the whole fuckin’ table lost their minds.

“You’re fucked,” Race chuckles as he catches up and once again slings an arm over Jack’s shoulders. “But, lucky for you, your second in command just so happens to be an expert in the world of love.”

“You wouldn’t know ‘love’ if it slapped ya in your ugly mug,” Jack mutters underneath his breath.

“I know that ya shouldn’t’ve left Davey back there,” Race says in a dreamy voice. “Did’ja even see his face, Jackie? He was lookin’ at you like ya hung the stars for him, and ya just walked off. I wouldn’t’a done that.”

“Oh, yeah?” Jack asks, raising a brow in annoyance. “What would you do, Higgins?”

“I would’a kissed him in front of everyone,” Race says with a shrug. “Gotta show ‘em who’s boss.”

“I--” Jack stops himself with a frustrated groan. “Ain’t you ever shut up?” He shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair. They must be quite the show; people pass them on the street. Couples walk hand in hand, kids play in the road with little wooden toys, and no one seems to be paying them any mind, but Jack looks seconds away from punching Racer in the face and Racer is laughing again.

Finally, Jack growls and stomps his foot. “It wouldn’t’a been a big deal if ya could’a kept your mouth shut!”

“Hey,” Race holds his hands up in surrender. “All’s I’m sayin’ is that ya better sweep in and get Dave, ‘fore anyone else gets any ideas. He’s obviously sweet on you,” He says as he crosses his arms. “That’s why I came to get’cha! Ya just stormed outta there-- Davey seemed pretty upset.”

“Upset that I called him… that,” Jack clenches his fists, letting out a deep sigh. “It don’t matter. He don’t like me like that.”

“You’re fuckin’ blinder than Specs,” Race deadpans, then grabs Jack’s shoulder and looks up at him. “Have ya seen the way Davey looks at you?”

Jack scoffs. “He looks at me the same way he looks at everyone else, I don’t--”

“Cisco.”

Jack cuts himself off, eyes widening just slightly as he meets Race’s eyes. He looks deadly serious now- it feels off, but Jack knows that Race only gets like this when he has to. He’s authoritative and serious as a heart attack when he puts in the effort to be.

Race stares straight into his eyes, tightening his grip on his shoulder. “Davey loves you,” He says as he furrows his brows. “Everyone can see it but you. He’s fallin’ hard, Jackie- has been for weeks, and you ain’t gonna do anything about it?”

Jack gulps, hard. “I… I don’t know what to do,” He admits, and rubs his face.

“What’d’ya mean, ya don’t know what to do?” Race rolls his eyes. “You’ve had a ton ‘a girlfriends in the past, just do--”

“No!” Jack shakes his head. “No, Davey’s- Davey’s different. He’s… He’s just different, okay? Mierda, every time I look at him, I just… I get so scared, Racer,” He sighs, rubbing his eyes. “Dave deserves so much, and I can’t give him any of it. I… I ain’t good enough for him, and he doesn’t… get it.”

Race watches him, a sad look on his face. “Davey’s willin’ to take anything you can give him,” He murmurs, then takes in a deep breath. “Look, I just--” Race shrugs, looking down. “It’s hard seein’ the two of you so upset. You think you ain’t good enough for him? He’s thinkin’ the same damn thing. He’s thinkin’ he ain’t good enough for you.”

“He’s too good for--”

“Who cares, Jack?” Race shakes his head. “Do ya love him?”

“Of course I do,” Jack says with no hesitation.

Race nods. “Then show him. One ‘a the fella’s from Queens likes him, and if you ain’t gonna get with him…” Race trails off, taking a few steps back, before turning and walking back in the direction of Jacobi’s. “Now, come back, and fuckin’ kiss him already. You two are gonna make me go gray, I swear to Christ.”

“¡Vete a la mierda!” Jack calls after him, standing still for a few moments, before groaning and following. “Racer-- Wait up!”

“Sbrigati, cazzo!” Race yells as he breaks into a sprint. “You got a boy to confess to, Kelly! Let’s get a move on!”

Maybe Race is right. Maybe Jack is a damn idiot.

But not for much longer.

[springtimeinthemuseum]

okay so this isn’t anything food related so my apologies hey. i just don’t really have a space to just go mental and write nonsense; so i’m doing it here. so disregard if you’re here for food content, but stay tuned for a bit of wholesome shit.

i am the middle child between two boys. my oldest is 1 year apart from me and my youngest is 5 years. so generally people think i’d be closest to my oldest. not the case. growing up, he really majorly sucked. would bully my youngest every day after school because we were home while my parents were at work. he told me to kill myself many times and once told me, in front of my dad, that if i didn’t kill myself then he would do it for me, then grabbed a knife. lovely.

my youngest is an angel. he was always called the ‘golden child’ and my oldest hated it. was mad jealous. but i fucking agreed hey. like everyone would say how i must hate that one sibling is considered the ‘golden child’. but literally no? it’s fact. this kid is just so thoughtful and kind. i often joke that he is adopted because how can you have me and my oldest, and then this fucking perfect human? impossible. he is just brilliant and as strange as it sounds i truly look up to him. he speaks his mind and he doesn’t do anything that he doesn’t genuinely want to do and he is so fucking beautifully kind. an example of his wholesomeness was the other night. i come out the front to smoke bc i’m an idiot. i often see crazy bugs and animals (i’m in australia). i saw a funky frog the other night and texted my family banter group chat. this kid comes out with his fucking frog book and flipped through the pages with me until we identified the lil guy???? idk if it’s silly but i just found that interaction so sweet. perhaps it’s because i’m used to being told to off myself by a sibling. we just sat there until we figured out who this frog was and then he told me some fun facts about the guy.

anyway. i’m not doing so great right now. tuesday is the 1 year anniversary of being discharged from hospital. i’ve never made it an entire year hospital free so i’m sort of wigging out a bit. i feel awful and on the verge of relapse in so many ways i’m just fucking panicking hey. but i helped my youngest move bedrooms tonight (oldest moved out so youngest took his bigger room). once we were finished we just sat there in his new room and talked. we go to the same uni so we laughed about how insane uni life is. he showed me stupid tik toks and i showed him stupid facebook videos. we do this every now and again. sit down and show each other stupid funny shit we’ve saved recently. and it truly just made everything better. every single fucking issue i’ve been having just faded away because i sat there and realised that the only thing that matters is this kid. if i can’t do it for myself then i can surely do it for this kid. he saves me in ways that he can never understand. i feel so incredibly lucky to have this man in my life and i just wanted to put it into words. i doubt that anyone will read this far and that’s okay. i suppose i’m putting this here for myself. so i can come back to this post when i’m feeling bad and just sit and realise that my world is more than me. i have never ever subscribed to the notion that i should do anything or live for anyone other than myself. but this kid is the one exception. i would do anything for him and he doesn’t even know it. i truly cannot put into words how beautiful this human is. he started a paramedicine degree because he loved the idea of helping people. but he changed his mind a year later and is now studying a degree in environmental management because he ‘wants to work at a national park and take school kids on tours and teach them about wildlife and the importance of preserving it’ ???? like hello? how fucking lovely??????

idk guys. idk why i feel the need to just vent and post this. but i’m doing it because it might help me in the future. i may be making some pretty awful decisions about my diet. but i truly strive to keep myself here as long as i can. not because i want to be here for my own life; but because i want to watch this man live his. so hopefully when i feel super bad i can come here and read this and just think about the fact that people like him exist. idk man. having those nights where it’s just us. two siblings that just get along. it’s not something i’m very used to. i’m so excited and surprised when it happens. i look forward to them so much and i often save videos knowing that it’s something i will show him next time we have a night like this. i sometimes wonder when he’ll grow out of it and when these nights will stop. but they haven’t. he’s 19 now and they haven’t. and i’m so grateful.

i know he will never read this but i hope he can feel the love and appreciation i have for him. if you’ve read this far then i love you too and i hope that you have someone in your life who can be this for you. and if you don’t please message me. we can create that together.

i love you Bus. you are the greatest man i’ve ever known, besides our father Paulos (who may have his own post one day because he is an absolute fucking queen)

thank you for listening to my nonsense if you’ve made it this far. i send my undying love to you. take care. take it easy. you’re okay.

[rainecreatesstuff]

LAMP Soulmate AU Bulletfic thing

Word Count: 2569

TW: Mentions and implications of abuse, mentions of anxiety, descriptions of panic attacks, mentions and implications of death + illness

They’re all connected in different ways

Virgil is connected to Patton through that thing where marks on your soulmate’s skin appear of yours too

Roman through a thing where on your eleventh birthday at 11:11pm a name will pop into your head and wow its your soulmate’s

And Logan through the string thing

Roman is connected to Patton through a timer on his wrist

And Logan through a tattoo-like mark on your wrist that says your soulmate’s first words to you

Logan and Patton are connected through a soulmark (A tattoo or raised pattern on your skin that is also on your soulmate)

Patton is blind

so in this au different soulmarkers develop at different ages

So when V’s little he’s super excited to meet his sm, bc his parents are soulmates and everything he’s seen abt them is so sweet and exciting!

He turns six and doesn’t develop a timer, which is what he was hoping for

But that’s ok! There are tons of other soulmarkers!

And then he doesn’t develop a soulmark when he’s seven

Or a sentence on his wrist when he’s eight

And he can see colours

So he’s starting to get nervous

And hey! Mom’s sick, and in the hospital, and she’s just not doing too swell

But then when he turns nine, a beautiful red string has been tied around his ring finger when he wakes up!

And wow! Mom look, I have a soulmate! Just like you and daddy!

And then a few months later he’s doing his homework at the kitchen table and the string goes limp before shriveling up and turning black

The doctors have no explanation, and V’s anxiety has really started to kick in

Mom doesn’t seem to be getting better either

So when he turns ten, he is fully aware that this is probably his last chance to develop a soulmarker

He writes on his forearm the night before his birthday

It says “Hey, I’m V! I guess we’re soulmates?”

When he wakes up there’s nothing new

Which is fine! Because that means his sm is probably in the same time zone as him!

But then he keeps waiting and

Nothing

Nothing for a week.

Eventually his dad convinces him to wash it off

Then on his eleventh birthday he knows how uncommon a soulname connection is, but he needs to try

So it’s 11:10 and he’s sitting at his desk with a marker ready to write it down and then-

Roman Prince

Roman prince? What do you mean Roman prince? That’s not a name! What the hell?!

So he’s really sad and anxious and stuff because he doesn’t have a soulmate and, yknow, that’s kinda upsetting for him

And hey, your mom really isn’t doing too well, we have to visit her after school, okay?

At first Virgil doesn’t understand why mom’s being so dramatic or why she keeps telling him she loves him

Then it hits him

And now he’s sobbing and hugging her and shaking and he can’t breathe he can’t breathe he can’t breathe

Fun fact! Turns out this is a regular thing and he has really bad anxiety.

And mom has been put in a medically induced coma

So a year later dad decides to pull the plug

Virgil’s anxiety has gotten really bad

He’s just not in a good place

High school goes by without much happening

Now he’s going to university! How exciting and stressful!

Roman, too, was entranced by the idea of soulmates. His parents aren’t soulmates, but they encourage his excitement about them!

And when he turns six, he develops a timer on his wrist! Score! What a romantic way to meet the love of your life!

Or friend of your life

His moms are so excited for him! They get him new paints and take him out to dinner to celebrate.

And then he wakes up on his eighth birthday to words on his right wrist

It says “If you could stop talking, it would be vastly appreciated.”

He’s a little pissed

His moms take him to the doctor bc “wtf why does he have TWO soulmarkers?!”

The answer is that he has two soulmates

It’s uncommon, but possible

So while he is ecstatic and ready to parade his soulmarkers around the school, his moms are a little less happy and a little more worried

They may have made the suggestion that he wears long sleeves most days, those ones that he hates because they will not roll up

But he did what they asked because they’re his moms, and he loves them very much

And then a few years later on his birthday he’s typing up a short story for school

It’s due the next day so he’s rushing through it a little bit

It’s still amazing

But anyways, he’s writing, and he suddenly just gets the name “Virgil Miller” stuck in his head

He doesn’t think anything of it bc he’s writing and that’s normal

He ends up naming the main character Virgil 

Logan grows up in a bit of a run-down part of town

His Mami and Dad are soulmates (he doesn’t think they should be)

They fight a lot, and sometimes Dad’ll hurt Mami, especially at night when they think he’s asleep

And he’s heard Mami on the phone with his Tia, talking about court cases? And laws, and soulmates?

Needless to say, he isn’t all too enamoured with the idea of soulmates

When he’s seven he gets a soulmark, some bumps over his heart, which is a little distressing

He’s never met this person, but he’s supposed to spend his whole life with them?

He’s very scared that his soulmate will be like Dad

And then he develops the words “Bold of you to assume I can stop talking” on his right wrist

And then a string when he’s nine.

He doesn’t tell his parents about any of them. “Soulless” people existed, and he knew his Mami was hoping he was one of them.

And then later that year Mami sits him down and tells him that she’s going to live with his Tia until she can find her own apartment, and that she and Dad aren’t together anymore

Logan cries for a while, and tells her about all the things he’s heard, and the bruises he’s seen, and begs to go with her

Mami says she was hoping he would

His Dad finds out the day before they leave and he hits Logan

Multiple times

And when his Mami steps in, Dad scowls and yells and stomps away and Mami picks Logan up and they run to the car and leave

When they get to his Tia’s he hides in the guest bedroom they said is his and he takes a pair of scissors and

Snip snip, he’s 33% more “soulless”

He steals Mami’s concealer and puts it on his wrist everyday to cover the words there

The only one he doesn’t cover is the soulmark on his chest, which he almost never sees because of his shirt

Whenever anyone asks, he just tells them he’s soulless

He tries not to get too close to people, but he usually fails and so he has a very small, very tight friend group 

Oh also he’s a grade ahead of his year

Patton’s family is very well off

He’s the oldest of four brothers

He’s trans, but his family is v supportive and helped him transition as soon as they found out

His service dog’s name is Cookie and she’s a golden retriever

He’s had her since he was eleven, and he loves her very much

Because he’s blind there’s certain things he didn’t know about growing up

For example, nobody told him about soulmates until he was nine

Which really explains the weird ticking he hears every once in a while, as well as the strange, tiny bumps on his chest (which spell out “Loved” in Braille)

He doesn’t think about it too often, but he’d be lying if the idea didn’t entrance him

He didn’t think he’d ever meet his soulmates, though, and if he did, he wasn’t sure they’d want the responsibility of a blind soulmate

On the day he turns ten, there’s this little tickling on his forearm, like butterflies gently taking off on him

He doesn’t really think anything of it, though

Despite being blind, Patton is super capable

He can’t cook by himself, but if he’s supervised he does a really good job. He’s the most prepared for “real life” out of his siblings, which is strange, considering he’s the oldest

He goes to public school, where most kids are really nice (sometimes antagonistically nice), but there were also some rude kids

“You don’t really need that walking stick, you’ve got a dog, and we need it to play our game!”

The amount of times he’s had to explain that no you dumbass I do still need the stick is ridiculous

But he keeps a smile on his face and forges through it

And then in grade eleven Roman’s studying in the hallway when he sees some kid being bullied

Well, not bullied, but definitely teased. Something was wrong, anyways

He’s been on edge all day because his timer keeps going down

But he’s not really thinking about it rn

So he goes over and gets the idiots to leave and

Holy hell did heaven drop an angel? They must have, because look at this boy with his golden hair and tanned skin and freckles and

Beep beep motherfucker. It’s soulmate o’clock

And Roman is just so happy

“H-hey, I’m Roman!” “Oh, hi, I’m Patton! Did... did your timer go off?” “Uh yeah! It did!”

And Patton

Just grins so wide and there’s tears, and he leaps up and hugs Roman so tight

And Roman is so freaking happy!!!! He asks Patton for his contact because duh and Pat’s like

“Uhhh well I can’t text”

“Why?”

“..... I’m blind?” “OHHHHHHH”

So they figure they can talk over the phone because Patton does have a phone for calling

So they have a cute first date and they fall in love and everything’s good and dandy and Roman’s going to college but Patton’s found this real nifty job that just so happens to be right next to Roman’s college so they move in together and Patton knows about Roman’s other sm and Roman knows about Patton’s other sm

And Roman’s in a lecture now

And he didn’t really notice but he’s been muttering

And he’s just kinda sitting there when he hears it from the guy next to him

So he looks up and here’s this ethereal looking dude with gorgeous brown eyes and dark hair and

“Bold of you to assume I can stop talking.”

He curses every known god for making his first words to his soulmate be a meme

They excuse themselves from class because holy shit

And Logan introduces himself shakily

And Roman asks for his number

And they go on a date where Roman tells him about Patton and Logan mentions having a soulmark over his heart

Logan is really hesitant to join their relationship bc he was hoping he would never meet his soulmates

So they don’t put a label on it right away

But they go on a few dates and hang out a bunch and Logan realizes that he actually really, really likes these guys and he doesn’t really want to live the rest of his life without them

So he talks to them and tells them about some of the stuff that happened when he was a kid

Roman and Patton are horrified but they hug him and promise that they will never lay a finger on him if he asks them not to 

And Logan just has a moment of “These guys love me. Like actually love me. And want me to be happy. And I think I feel the same?” 

So on their next date Logan asks both of them to be his boyfriends and obviously they say yes

And basically they’re just all really in love

They move into a bigger apartment together at the beginning of year two

So then they’re all cuddling one day when Logan tells them about his string

And so the other two are like “oh shit is there another???”

And Roman says that on his eleventh birthday he just suddenly had this name pop into his head but he just assumed he’d wanted the name for a character so

And Patton says that after getting his soulmark AND a timer he didn’t think to check for anything else

So they’re all kinda like well whoops let’s hope we still meet them!

And Patton’s at his job one day when this guy walks in and he’s one of the new employees

Pat’s got his seeing eye doggo with him but the vest is off cuz they’re both on break

And so V’s like “oh cool dog can I pet him?”

Bc usually he would never just go up and ask but he literally can’t stop himself because here’s this adorable dude in front of him and the universe is screeching at him to say hi

And Pat hears his voice and immediately falls in love

“Oh, yea sure! She’s my eye dog, but she’s on break so it’s all good!”

And V meets Pat and his dog

And they end up exchanging numbers because they are coworkers and well

Yknow

So a couple days later, after him and Patton have been talking a lot, Pat invites him over

So V goes over and meets Roman and Logan

And he hears Roman’s name and

Holy shit

And of course Roman is also freaking out because the name Virgil just really hasn’t left his head since he thought of it

So yknow

Logan’s a little unsure, but then the two get talking about astronomy and he doesn’t care if they’re not soulmates he is going to marry this guy

And they all get really close really fast

And then one day Virgil offhandedly mentions the string thing

And Logan freezes and just

Shows V his right ring finger, where they can both see this rotting string that’s still tied tight around it and

Fuck V can’t breathe are you kidding? right now?

So they help ground him, and Logan explains everything

And Roman tells him what’s up

But they’re not really sure how he’s connected to Patton but then he just

Grabs a marker and draws a heart on his hand and

It’s right there on Patton’s hand holy s h i t

So they take Virgil on a date and stuff and they make it official

And Virgil’s a little nervous bc like those three have been together for a while now and he feels like he’s intruding

But he talks to Logan and L understands bc Roman and Patton had been dating for 2+ years when he found them

He promises that V is not intruding and that they all really love him

And Virgil just full on starts crying because he hasn’t felt this loved since before his mom died and he loves his bfs so much

They find their bfs and just cuddle all night

Virgil moves in with the rest of them at the beginning of third year 

They get their happily ever after for the most part

Hopefully y’all liked this! I think I’ll be posting more writing on here, bc I have TONS of wips stacked up in a google docs and I’d like to get them out of there lmao

[gamerwoo]

Wonwoo: Hearing Lips

Characters: Wonwoo x female reader

Genre/warnings: non idol au, angst, a little fluff, a little crack, terminal illness/cancer, implied major character death. basically this starts out a lil happy but just gets worse and worse as it goes on

Word count: 3,053

Summary: Sometimes relationships get hard. Sometimes someone cheats. Sometimes someone doesn’t feel the same anymore. And sometimes, someone gets sick and things take a turn for the worst. But in the last instance, no matter how hard things get, you stick beside them until the end. Because you love them.

a/n: i wanna make a second part at some point bc i have an idea for it but i have a lot of shit to do so we’ll see

Wonwoo took in a deep breath before letting it out slowly. He looked down at the clippers that one of his friends, Minghao held in his hand.

“This sucks,” was what he decided to say.

You pursed your lips and nodded slowly. It was at that stage where your husband’s hair was starting to fall out, but he decided he didn’t want to go through all that. Wonwoo asked if you would care if he just shaved his head to avoid the hair loss. You asked him why you’d care.

“What if I’m ugly?” was his response, which made both of you chuckle.

“You’re always going to be the most handsome man on the planet to me,” you replied.

So he called on his friend, Minghao to do the cutting for him. A handful of his other friends showed up, promising to shave their own heads along with Wonwoo just so he wouldn’t feel so alone.

“Why can’t I do it?” Mingyu whined. “We’ve been friends longer!”

“Because you’d probably shave his ear off,” Joshua scoffed.

As the group began to tease Mingyu, Minnghao turned to you, offering the clippers to you, “Are you sure you don’t want to do it, _____?”

You looked down at the clippers, considering it. But ultimately, you shook your head, “What if I shave his ear off?”

“The only thing I want to lose today is my hair, thanks,” Wonwoo nodded.

“Alright,” Minghao turned the clippers on, but Wonwoo didn’t react to the noise. The sound of the clippers didn’t scare him like he thought they might. Just because he had to shave his head, that didn’t mean it was the end. “Are you ready?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged before he sat in the chair placed in front of Minghao.

While Minghao shaved Wonwoo hair, the strands falling in clumps on the floor around him, the rest of you watched and told various stories of times you’d hung out together just to lighten the mood and make each other laugh. Like the time Soonyoung stuck bubblegum in Jeonghan’s hair to see if peanut butter would actually get it out. Or when they managed to convince Seokmin that girls don’t have to shave, their hair just falls off when it gets too long. 

The rest of the boys took turns sitting down in front of Minghao before Josh did the younger boy’s hair. 

Admittedly, Wonwoo pulled the bald look off.

Seungcheol absolutely did not.

-

“Where are you going?”

You had heard the bedroom door closed and turned your head away from the TV in time to see Wonwoo walk down the hall. You’d brought him home from his chemotherapy appointment and knew he was supposed to be resting afterwards, so you were concerned as to why he was going down the hall.

“Office,” he replied.

You got up from the couch and went to follow him, “Why?”

“Bills.”

Wonwoo was always a stickler for paying the bills on time, but you weren’t sure why he didn’t just let you do it or simply ask you to do it for him.

“You’re supposed to be resting,” you told him.

“I’ll be sitting in a chair, it’s fine,” he said before entering the office and shutting the door behind him.

With a sigh, you retreated back to the living room, deciding to text one of your friends to see what to do. Wonwoo had been getting a bit touchy lately, and you didn’t want to tell him what to do and make him mad. So your best option was to get advice because you didn’t want Wonwoo to pass out in the office or something.

To Hansol: wonwoo wont lay down

From Hansol: ???? whats he doing?

To Hansol: paying the bills in the office

From Hansol: ah

From Hansol: maybe he wants to make himself useful??

To Hansol: wdym

From Hansol: all he’s supposed to be doing now is basically nothing

From Hansol: things arent looking good rn

From Hansol: he probably want to do things for you and himself while he still can

You stared at your phone, feeling a pang in your chest reading the texts. You let out a sigh and set your phone down, letting Wonwoo stay in the office to do the bills.

-

it was the first time all of the guys had come over since putting Wonwoo’s bed in the living room. It was the only place with enough space since it was a hospital bed, and Wonwoo would at least always have the TV since the only thing he could do at this point was lay in bed.

“Wish I could sleep in my living room,” Soonyoung said.

“Yeah, I bet your girlfriend wishes that, too,” Jeonghan nodded.

Once a month, they’d all have a game night where the thirteen of them would gather at someone’s house to play something, whether it be Uno, poker, Cards Against Humanity, or whatever else they could come up with for that many players. But until your husband got better, it would have to be at your house all the time.

You gave them their space despite insisting they could include you in the game. You decided to just go to the office and use Wonwoo’s PC to play some games and watch a little YouTube. 

In the living room, the boys were playing Uno together while talking and laughing together. A few of them were drinking beer as well, but most of them stuck to soft drinks instead.

“How’re you doing lately, Woo?” Jeonghan asked after taking a sip of his drink.

Wonwoo shrugged with a sigh, “Fine, I guess. I can only use this blanket because the others feel bad on my skin. I’m bored. I’ve watched like, every YouTube video ever at this point.”

“How do you feel, though?” Chan wondered.

“Tired.”

Junhui laid down a card before looking over at Wonwoo, “How’s _____ been?”

“She’s an absolute angel,” he chuckled. “She takes care of me and everything. She’s the strongest person I know.”

“If you ever need one of us to stay here for a couple days to help out, you know you can ask,” Jihoon stated with a handful of them nodding or giving various sounds of agreement.

“Neither of us wants to bother anyone.”

“It’s not a bother,” Seungcheol said, looking Wonwoo in the eyes. “Neither of you will ever be a bother.”

Jeonghan nodded, “We know things are going to get tough and we’re here for you guys. Just say the word.”

“Yeah...” Wonwoo shrugged with a deep sigh as he put down a card when it was his turn, “there are days worse than others. But lately, it’s been okay, I guess. At least, that’s what she leads me to believe.”

“Yeah, _____’s never been one to break down in front of people,” Seungkwan mumbled.

“I hope she’s doing okay, though,” Wonwoo frowned. “I feel so bad for her...”

You truly were the strongest person Wonwoo knew for doing just about everything for not only him, but for yourself and everything around the house. And you did it all without ever showing if you were feeling negatively -- at least, not around him. Wonwoo thought you were absolutely amazing, but inside, he felt guilty for doing this to you.

But like you’d never tell Wonwoo when you felt overwhelmed, he’d never tell you how he felt, either.

-

It was one of those days. One of those bad days. You felt like the world was crumbling right in front of you but there was nothing you could do about it. You were sad, scared, stressed out, and you didn’t know what to do next or who to go to. You always just kept things bottled inside even though your friends and family told you it was better to talk to people about things. But you didn’t want to seem like you were complaining about Wonwoo. It wasn’t your husband that was the problem, it was the situation.

You had taken Wonwoo’s empty dinner plate from the living room to the kitchen, setting it in the sink. You dropped your head, hands gripping the edge of the counter as you squeezed your eyes shut to keep the tears threatening to escape from spilling. 

Something one of the nurses had said to you during one of Wonwoo’s hospital visits was to be careful of what you say, even quietly, around him.

“People with cancer and the like tend to just hear really well,” she explained. “Especially when they can’t open their eyes anymore. Their hearing is scarily good. Don’t say anything bad around him because he will hear it.”

You learned to only let out your emotions when you were alone in your bedroom, but you couldn’t make it through the living room to get there. So you just stood in the kitchen, trying to compose yourself to go back out into the living room to sit with your husband.

“This is too hard,” you just barely whispered to yourself.

“I know,” you heard Wonwoo say softly from the living room, “I’m sorry, love.”

You lifted your head, your heart breaking hearing him apologize. You didn’t even think about how he heard you, rushing into the other room to promise that you weren’t talking about him. As you walked up to his bed, he looked up at you with a sad half-smile.

“I know I’m making things tough,” he continued quietly. “I’m really sorry you have to deal with it.”

“No, baby, no,” you quickly shushed him, cupping his face in your hands. “It’s not you, it’s the situation. You’re not difficult or making things difficult. None of this is your fault.”

Wonwoo didn’t really like things touching his skin because it had become so sensitive and felt weird when most things touched it, but he leaned into your touch and put his hands over yours. He noticed the tears welling up in your eyes and reached one hand up to brush his thumb under one of your eyes.

“It’s okay if you need to cry, you know,” he told you. “You keep everything to yourself and that’s not healthy.”

You shook your head, whispering so your voice wouldn’t break, “I have to be strong for you. I don’t want to cry and scare you that things are getting bad.”

He chuckled sadly, “_____, I know things are bad. You’re stressed. You can cry, it’s okay.”

Hearing him say that broke you for some reason. You collapsed in the chair you kept beside his bed and just cried while he held your hand. That was the first time you cried in front of Wonwoo in a long time.

While you cried, you heard him softly tell you, “You’re still the strongest person I know.”

-

Despite not wanting to go, Wonwoo had to be admitted to the hospital. You weren’t sure for how long, but he was complaining about feeling sick and neither of you were sure if it was cancer-related or not. But the doctors decided it was best to keep an eye on him for a couple days until he was feeling better.

Unfortunately, he was getting to a point where his eyes didn’t open as often. Even if he was awake, sometimes he just looked like he was sleeping. You were told that would happen eventually, and whenever Wonwoo looked at you, you looked back at him and tried to memorize the shade of brown as if it would be the last time you’d ever see his eyes.

Jeonghan came to visit you at the hospital after finding out you were there for an entire day without anybody besides Wonwoo. So he rushed there after work and sat with you in Wonwoo’s hospital room, both of you trying to keep your voices down since Wonwoo seemed to be sleeping. You knew if Wonwoo knew that one of his friends were there, he would’ve been talking to them.

Jeonghan reached out with his foot, nudging your shin with the tip of his sneaker to get your attention. You looked over at him. He mouthed something to you, but you weren’t sure what it was.

You cocked your head to one side, mouthing, “What?”

He leaned forward, so you did, too. He tried to whisper his question as quitely as he could, but you still heard absolutely nothing, and you were having trouble reading his lips.

“What?” you mouthed again.

“He asked if you paid the bills on time,” Wonwoo murmured, still looking like he was asleep, “but it’s okay if you didn’t.”

The only part of Wonwoo that moved was his mouth. Even once he was done talking, he looked like he had been sleeping the entire time. You wondered if you almost inaudible conversation was heard loud and clear to him.

“O-oh,” you said. “Um, my mom reminded me, yeah.”

“Did you...have enough?” Jeonghan wondered.

“Please don’t offer us money again,” you frowned.

“You know I have more than enough for myself. And you’re always staying home to take care of Wonwoo. I just want to make sure you’re both okay fanatically.”

It was true that Jeonghan made pretty good money. And considering his last relationship didn’t work out, he only had to support himself. For what he got paid, he definitely had some to spare. Still, neither you nor Wonwoo wanted to take ‘free money’ from your friends.

You opened your mouth to reply, but a nurse had walked in and asked to speak with you. You sent a playful glare toward Jeonghan before you got up and left the room.

Jeonghan was unaware that Wonwoo’s hearing had gotten so strong, and the fact he heard the question surprised him. So he wanted to test it to see how good it was, mouthing something else.

“No, Jeonghan, you can’t steal my wife,” Wonwoo sighed with the hints of a smirk on his face. “At least not until I’m dead.”

Jeonghan ignored the dark addon at the end, letting out a chuckle, “That’s kind of spooky, dude.”

“I hear everything now,” he said.

The older boy sat back in his seat, staring over at his friend who still had his eyes closed -- despite that, he still had his glasses on for whatever reason, “Have you actually...talked with _____ about that, though?”

“About you stealing her?”

“No. Have you told her if you’d want her to move on if you actually do...y’know?”

“Yeah. When I was first bedridden, I figured I should mention it. I told her to just find someone who makes her happy, even if it was one of you. I just said she can’t marry Soonyoung because he’s a fucking idiot.”

Jeonghan let out a laugh, leaning forward in his chair, “Yeah, I don’t think any of us would let that happen. Even Soonyoung knows he wouldn’t be good enough for her.”

“I’m glad she’ll at least have you guys if anything happens,” Wonwoo hummed. “You’ll watch out for her. You’ll make sure she doesn’t get into any shady relationships or do anything reckless.”

“Why do you always assume we need to be there?”

“Because I need to be prepared.”

Jeonghan sat back in his seat again, not knowing what to say. He just stared at his friend, hoping that he was preparing for nothing.

-

You had a bad feeling this was coming, but you were hoping it was just your anxiety telling you that. But when the doctor told you that you had to have the papers signed, you knew that there wasn’t any going back now.

Wonwoo was going to die.

Just in case, he had already gone to have the papers drawn up for if he’d want to be revived or not if anything should happen. But he had forgotten to get them from your attorney so they had to be retrieved and signed. But you were specifically told you couldn’t just instruct your husband to sign them. You had to sit there and explain what everything was, and then he could sign them. You just weren’t sure if you could do that.

Seungcheol was the one who went into Wonwoo’s hospital room with you with the papers. You sat down by Wonwoo’s bed while Seungcheol sat in a chair across the room and watched, just there for emotional support if you needed it.

“What’re those?” Wonwoo asked.

“I need to go over these with you,” you told him.

You sat by his bed with his table pulled out as you read the papers and explained what they meant. You already knew the decisions Wonwoo had made, but reading them and saying them out loud was hard, especially knowing that this was how things would end. He said he didn’t want to be revived because he knew how hard it would be on you. He wanted to make things quicker and easier.

“So if you’re to...start...going...you don’t want--”

You couldn’t even finish the sentence before you choked on your tears, coughing to clear your throat.

And that’s when Wonwoo knew. This was it.

“Why’re you crying?” he asked quietly. He knew this was coming. He knew you knew this was coming. But he knew you wanted to believe it wouldn’t. 

You sniffed while you tried to control your breathing so you wouldn’t break down sobbing. But it didn’t work, tears already falling down your cheeks as you whimpered, “I don’t want you to die.”

“I know,” he murmured. “I don’t want to leave you.”

Seungcheol got up and stood beside you, rubbing your back to comfort you despite tears of his own escaping from his eyes. He couldn’t even say anything to help you feel better because he knew nothing would work. So he helped you go over the papers with Wonwoo while all three of you tried to choke back tears.

-

It was getting close. You knew it was. You just had a feeling that stuck with you all day, so you never left Wonwoo’s side. You held his hand and sat beside him for hours, trying to keep your crying as silent as you could while you mouthed ‘I love you’ as many times as you could because you were too afraid of your voice breaking if you spoke.

But you knew Wonwoo heard every word.

[beanst0ck]

my friend wanted the tsukishima version of this so i had to do it 🥴

pairing: tsukishima x reader

word count: 1438

cross posted on my wattpad

Kissing His Best Friend [[Tiktok Challenge]]

- the gentle wind ruffled the trees and bushes surrounding the high school of crows

- while the air outside seemed cool and fresh, the air inside the gym was hot and stuffy

- the boy’s volleyball team was practicing extra hard especially two certain first years

- halfway during practice the third years got called out of the gym by a teacher to discuss something about their grades, leaving the rest of the team to either continue practicing or take a break

- hinata and kageyama continued to practice hard while tsukki grabbed a water bottle and sat against a wall, waiting for the rest of the team to return

- out of the corner of his eye he spotted nishinoya and tanaka trying to do tiktok dances in sync and failing miserably

- tsukki knew about a lot of tiktok trends and dances thanks to his energetic teammates, but he didn’t spend most of his day mindlessly scrolling through the app

- he had things to do, like studying and watching his dinosaur documentaries, so he didn’t have time to waste doing silly tiktok trends

- snapping out of his thoughts he noticed he was in the camera’s frame and grimaced, trying to scoot away but his upperclassmen immediately noticed

- “tsukishima!! join us!!”

- “no.”

- nishinoya and tanaka pouted at their teammate’s salty behavior, but immediately brightened up noticing a certain someone walk through the gym doors

- “(y/n)!!”

- they ran past tsukki and opened their arms in hopes that they’d be able to trap you in the ultimate bear hug

- sadly for them, you dodged them just in time, leaving them to face plant onto the floor

- you slowly walked away from them and upon noticing your best friend you jogged over to him

- “tsukki!!”

- nishinoya and tanaka sniffled while patting each other’s back, knowing they’ll never be able to have you because your heart belonged to the salt shaker

- tsukishima greeted you and asked you why you were still at school even though school had already ended a few hours ago

- “the teachers wanted me to drop off papers to the captains of all the teams we have, all i need is daichi and i should be free to go!”

- “daichi isn’t here.”

- he had to hold back his laugh once he saw your reaction to the captain’s absence

- “i did not just walk across campus for daichi to not be here.”

- “hate to break it to you, but you did.”

- “tsukki! you’re supposed to be nice to me!! >:(“

- you smacked his arm and this time tsukishima couldn’t hold back a chuckle at your childish attitude

- nishinoya and tanaka’s ears perked at the sound of tsukishima’s chuckle

- they literally looked at each other like ‘ 👀 ‘

- yamaguchi, being the literal angel that he is, offers to show you where daichi is so you could deliver the packet of papers to him

- you literally go “really?🥺”

- tsukki definitely didn’t get salty, no sir he didn’t

- except that maybe he did-

- nishinoya and tanaka decide to set their unspoken plan into motion and cough to get the attention of the group

- “you know what tsukishima? why don’t you go with yamaguchi?”

- “but it’s not my job to deliver-“

- “dont disrespect your upperclassmen!! besides, (y/n)’s feet must be sore from walking around the whole day!”

- tsukki sighs, knowing that arguing with the two of them is literally impossible

- so he embarks on a mini adventure with yamaguchi to deliver some papers to daichi

- just when you’re about to tell nishinoya and tanaka that they didn’t have to do that and you were perfectly capable of delivering those papers yourself they turn to you with one of the biggest smiles you’ve ever seen

- “(y/n)! we have a plan!”

- “...ok?”

- so there you stood as nishinoya and tanaka explained their ‘ perfect plan ‘ on how you would get to kiss tsukishima

- “you’re the only one that tsukishima can tolerate enough to do this!!“

- “...you’re just using me for tiktok views aren’t you?”

- “...”

- “*sigh*”

- nonetheless you agreed because,,, who would pass up the opportunity to kiss tsukishima? exactly no one

- and if you said you would,,, no you wouldn’t stop lying to yourself

- if anything went wrong and your friendship nearly gets ruined you could blame it on nishinoya and tanaka

- so they start setting up the area

- tanaka tells hinata and kageyama to practice on the other side of the court, just incase one of kageyama’s sets goes astray and ends up hitting someone

- nishinoya and tanaka set up the phone and begin recording, not knowing when tsukishima would walk through the doors

- “what if he doesn’t catch me-“

- “don’t be so negative (y/n)!”

- you had many many doubts about this plan

- but you went along with it because you got an excuse to kiss tsukishima

- soon you heard footsteps from outside the window and signaled tanaka and nishinoya

- they gave you a thumbs up, wishing you luck and hoping that their plan wouldn’t fail because if it did you would most likely stop talking to them

- as soon as the doors opened yamaguchi and tsukishima stepped inside, now was your moment!

- “tsukki! catch me!!”

- tsukishima turned his head to the sound of your voice, his mind not registering the words you said when he saw you quickly running towards him

- when you jumped he instinctively held out his arms and caught you, almost stumbling backwards from the force

- your legs were wrapped around his waist and your hands were on his shoulders as you let out excited giggles, happy that he actually caught you

- “idiot, why’d you do that? what if i didn’t catch yo-“

- without thinking you grabbed his head and smashed your lips against his

- tsukishima, still not processing that you jumped for him to catch you, also could not process that you were kissing him

- taking his lack of response as a ‘im not kissing you back’ you slowly pulled your lips away but didn’t get the chance to as tsukishima placed his hand behind your head to kiss you back

- mind you, tsukishima was still carrying you, just with one arm bc he’s strong 🥴

- nishinoya and tanaka were hyping you up with tears in their eyes from sadness or happiness is up to you to decide

- yamaguchi was secretly recording because he wanted to have his own video proof that he was there to witness the moment

- even hinata and kageyama got distracted mid set-

- oh no

- o h n o

- hinata and kageyama got distracted mid set

- hinata was so focused on the scene that his hand unconsciously followed his eyes and he accidentally sent the ball flying towards the two of you

- just as the two of you pulled away from the kiss tsukki noticed the ball flying towards the two of you and turned his body around so it wouldn’t hit you

- instead of the ball hitting your head it ended up hitting his

- the gym remained quiet as tsukishima rubbed the back of his head in an attempt to soothe the pain of the spike

- hinata was absolutely distraught, knowing he was about to suffer the wrath of the angry salt shaker

- “tsukki!! are you ok??”

- you were quick to gently grab his head and rub the back of it, occasionally rubbing your hands through his hair in an attempt to distract him from the pain

- suddenly all the pain tsukishima felt was gone lMAO-

- tsukishima nodded and exited the gym with you

- he set you down outside and told you to wait while he went to go get his things

- all hinata got was a bonk on the head?? which was?? shocking??

- hinata mentally thanked you for soothing the salty monster’s wrath

- once tsukishima returned back to you he squatted down in front of you and you looked at him like ‘🤨’

- “what are you doing?”

- “don’t your feet hurt? hurry and hop on before i change my mind.”

- oh boY

- you were so quick to jump onto his back for a piggyback ride

- on the way home you asked tsukishima if he liked you and he literally sCOFFED

- “we kissed and you still doubt my feelings for you? do you need another one to clear your head?”

- i mean... you didn’t say no to that

- the next day nishinoya and tanaka show you the video they took

- people were fawning over how fast tsukishima was to turn his body so you wouldn’t get hurt

- tsukishima acted like he didn’t like the attention but this little shit was eating it up

- if you wanted to do more tiktoks with him involving kissing he was not going to deny you

haikyuu mlist

[leerongrong]

of dispatch and jealousy.

Pairing: Mark Lee x Reader

Word Count: 2.9k

Summary: In which you’re dragged into a dating scandal with your not-so-boyfriend Jaemin and actual boyfriend Mark gets jealous.

Requested: yess!! what if you wrote a mark x idol!reader where she’s best friends with dream and he gets jealous over her being on a variety show with jaemin and she never leaves jaemin’s  side during it bc she’s nervous and he’s the only one she knows?

“Just relax.” Bright studio lights are somewhat blinding, they stand tall and loom over the figures standing side by side to each other. The studio’s buzzing with life as staff and crew members hustle around the space to prepare the stars for their filming schedule, one of them standing in front of you to add finishing touches to your makeup while another behind you, adding hair spray to your already frigid hair. Your eyes are trailing to the side, where you see one of your best friends in a similar condition. “Besides, you look prettier when you smile.”

The smile that breaks out on Jaemin’s face is sweet, the same one you always see him wear on camera, and it’s almost contagious that your lips start to stretch into one. You and Jaemin are currently on set for a variety show, sent as SM’s representatives along with a few other groups from other agencies, all of them unknown people to you, knowing none of them with only Jaemin as your companion.

“Mark-hyung agrees with me too.” He’s putting both of his hands on his waist, in a mocking fashion along with puffing his chest out and trying his best in imitating Mark’s voice. “She’s so pretty when she smiles- I mean she’s always pretty but like especially when she smiles, the really big one you know? Honestly every one of her smiles are angelic but- you get what i mean right, Jaems?”

The giggle he pulls out of you is angelic, shaking your whole body while your lips form into a smile. Jaemin’s been the only few people who could pull a genuine smile out of you, the other one being Mark Lee, your otherwise current boyfriend of 6 months.

Jaemin was the one who introduced you, claiming with a wink that, “The two of you were meant for each other.” and while you’d never been one for measly crushes, you couldn’t deny the fact that Mark had you enamoured by your 3rd meet up with him. You both had hit it off enough to write your tittle song together, the one which you used to confess your feelings to him and had hit number 1 in Melon the same day the two of you had gotten together, talk about a win win.

“You really shouldn’t day dream about Hyung here.” Jaemin’s face is up close to yours and he has a teasing smile on his face as he boops your nose along with jabbing his fingers into your stomach. “People could find out.”

Your hairstylist rolls her eyes at the two of you, clearly entertained by your jabs and nicks at each other. She adds another clip into your hair before parting on her way while your eyes are scanning the other idols, along with Jaemin, smiling politely when one of them sends a wave your way.

“Everyone! Let’s get started!”

Thinking back on the variety show you did with Jaemin a few months ago, you couldn’t think of anything wrong. It had gone of smoothly, both the MC’s and other idols had been nothing but sweet to you, some even ended up being your friend afterwards. But as you’re sitting down in your own dorm, phone in hand while scrolling down the multiple headlines and news about you and Jaemin supposedly dating, you suppose you guessed wrong.

(BREAKING) DIspatch Reveals NCT Dream’s Na Jaemin and Soloist Y/N Are Dating.

Dispatch has confirmed another 2020′s SM Couple: NCT Dream’s Na Jaemin and Soloist Y/N!

Every year, Korean news outlet Dispatch rings in by revealing new celebrity couples to the public. This year, they released photos proving that NCT Dream’s Na Jaemin and Soloist Y/N have been secretly seeing each other.

According to Dispatch, Jaemin picked Y/N up at her dorm after shortly coming back from his sold out world tour, the two wearing masks and hats to cover their faces before they went to a restaurant for their date.

Dispatch also caught the couple walking while holding hands with each other very often, in between schedules or at filming sights. One of which is weekly idol, where a leaked footage reveals the couple acting very lovey dovey with each other on set.

The dorm is silent, not one sound in the air. The clock is ticking soundly while the cooked dinner you had set up slowly begins to become cold with the amount of time you’ve chosen to scroll down your phone while biting at your nails.

user 0945: i think they’re cute with each other.

user 4790: shouldn’t she be focusing on her career first? she debuts in SM and she’s wasting her time on dating? what an idiot.

user 6905: what does jaemin even see in her?

user 4823: she’s human too! it should be her choice to date.

user 8755: they’ve been dating for 2 years? wow.. we really don’t know our idols after all..

You’re taking in one comment after the other, some of your fans shipping you with Jaemin while others are bashing at the fact that you’ve chosen to get a boyfriend, claiming you as theirs to begin with. Your heart is filled with anxiety, a feeling of everything closing in at once and you’re taking in deep breaths to reduce the amount of stress you feel in your system.

Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! You have 25 new messages.

[22:10] Lee MinMark sent a message.

Babe? Are you okay?

[22:11] Lee MinMark sent a message.

Babe, please read your texts.

[22:12] You have one (1) missed voice call from Lee MinMark.

[22:13] Lee MinMark sent a message.

Answer your phone. Please. I need to know if you’re okay.

[22:13] Lee MinMark sent a voicemall.

[22:15] You have two (2) missed voice calls from Lee MinMark.

[22:15] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message.

so we’re dating now??

[22:15] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message.

does hyung know about this??

[22:17] You have four (4) missed voice call from Lee MinMark.

[22:17] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message.

hyung looks worried and pissed

[22:17] Boss Manager sent a message.

Do not give any information to the press. You need to stay quiet until this blows over.

[22:17] You have seven (7) missed voice calls from Lee MinMark.

[22:18] Boss Manager sent a message.

Come to the office tomorrow. We need to have a talk.

[22:19] Lee MinMark sent a message.

Fuck it. I’m coming over.

[22:20] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message. 

hyung’s coming over to you!

[23:07] Boss Manager sent a message.

Stay calm and be safe.

Your ears perk up when multiple knocks come from the door, fast and more urgent one after the other, turning into rapped jabs at the wooden surface. It soon turns into outright banging and your phone falls down to the carpeted floor below at the sound. You’re raising yourself up on shaky feet, slowly reaching out to grab the emergency bat beside the door and tiptoeing to peep through the fish eye door camera you installed for emergencies like this.

The door bursts open and you’re yelping, swinging the bat blindly at the unknown person in your home. “It’s me! It’s me! It’s Mark!”

“Mark? Are you out of your mind!?” The bat mistakenly hits Mark on his shoulder, him letting out a groan and kneeling down while clutching his injured shoulder. “I’m sorry! Oh My God. Are you okay?”

The door shuts with a soft click while Mark’s still bent down in front of him, promptly groaning when the wood catches on his shirt. You’re shuffling around, running to the freezer for an ice pack to help your boyfriend. The ice is cold in your hands, the material numbing your fingers as you press it down onto his injury.

“Are you okay?”

“How are you?”

You break out into a fit of giggles while Mark lets out a few chuckles, the both of you stilling for a moment before you tear of his cap and mask, revealing the face of your boyfriend. The bags around Mark’s eyes have worsened since the last you saw him, along with the obvious stress lines on his face and frizzy hair from too much hair dye as an added plus.

The dorm is still as silent as ever, this time the sounds of slurping noodles are added to the mix along with the sound of chattering news outlets on TV. Your eyes are wrapped around Mark’s neck as you sit in his lap, head laying in the crook of his shoulder as he works one his hands around your waist while the other sets down the cup of noodles on the desk beside him.

“How are you doing?” He mumbles, lips finding their way to your forehead to leave a peck in place. “About the dating thing.”

“I’m fine.” Your eyelids are starting to droop, the warmth Mark emits adding to the stressful situation makes you want to fall asleep and forget all your worries, even just for a little while. You lean back, eyes flicking up to meet his when he nods as an answer. “How about you?”

“What do you mean?” Mark’s eyes are a soft brown with a tint of gold to them, holding specks of stolen sunlight in them, the kind that you’d miss just with one glance. They’re filled with a raw emotion, an unwavering gaze that sometimes you find hard to meet, along with the earth’s unfiltered beauty that is so fascinating yet intriguing to memorize. “With the comeback? Babe?”

“I mean- yes, the comeback.” You laugh at the confused look at his face, his expression looking similarly like that of a confused puppy and you’re reminding yourself to change his names in your contacts. “But like- more of the me dating Jaemin news.”

“Oh” He mumbles, “I don’t really have an opinion on that..”

You’re tilting your head the moment he finishes his sentence. You know, for a fact, Mark’s never been one to back track on his words and you’re sure the way he spoke sounded more of like a question than it did a statement. “That’s good. I guess..”

“Are you staying the night?”

Mark’s head shoots up from its resting point in the crook of your neck, and he’s staring at you with a look of wonder in his eyes that had you ducking from his gaze, mouth stretching into a shy smile as you see a smile spread on his.

“You just had a dating scandal spread about you and your best friend,” He laughs, “But you still want me to stay over? I really am glad I’m dating you.”

Mark’s hands are pinching at your cheeks, his hands stretching the supple flesh while he scrunches his nose. Your own are entangled behind his neck, tugging the hairs on the nape of his neck with a scrunch of your own nose. It was moments like these that made you fall in love with Mark, the dorky boy that had his nose pressed up against glass, watching a thunderstorm and laughing. As an idol yourself, you found Mark most beautiful not when he had full on make up, but when he didn’t. You fell in love with him when he was lying on the carpet, hair a mess, laughing about something he saw on the internet. When he wasn’t trying to impress anyone, and had taken down all the walls he built for most people.

Six months in and all you knew was that Mark’s your muse, the one you write songs about, and the one who holds your heart.

Mark opens his eyes to the sound of your phone humming lowly and you asleep with his arms around you. He’s reaching his arm for the phone slowly in hopes he doesn’t wake you up from his movements.

You have 3 new messages.

[3:07] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message.

mark hyung went over to yours a few hours ago and he hasn’t come back yet

[3:07] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message. 

is he over with you?

[3:08] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message.

lovie, answer your phone please :(

A scoff comes out from Mark’s mouth the moment his eyes land on the nickname Jaemin specifically has for you. Even before the dating news broke out, Mark’s always been a bit jealous of you and Jaemin’s bond, the people around him always thinking Jaemin’s the one who stole your heart. Jaemin, the one who’s been by your side and who knows you the best, Na Jaemin and not Mark Lee.

You have 5 new messages.

[3:09] You have one (1) missed call from “Lover” Boy Nana.

[3:10] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a voice mail.

[3:11] You sent a message to “Lover” Boy Nana.

Stop messaging MY girlfriend at 3 AM, Na.

Tapping sounds fill the air as Mark turns off your phone before placing it somewhere behind him, he’s looking down at you to make sure he hasn’t woken you up and he’s smiling at the sight of you sleeping on his chest. Mark’s putting his hands under your feet, lifting you up bridal style to place you on your bed. He’s tucking you in when your hands grab at the front of his shirt.

“Don’t leave,” You mumble, “Stay, please.”

“You know I can’t.” Mark’s bending down to press a kiss onto your forehead, cheeks warming when he sees you unconsciously smile in your sleep. Even when he wishes he could spend the night snuggled up with you, he doesn’t want you to get into more trouble than you already have. “I’ll text you tomorrow. Sweet dreams.”

The room is engulfed in darkness the moment Mark’s fingers touch the lamp, his footsteps echoing just a bit before disappearing completely once the door clicks shut. He’s crouching down to throw out his used ramen bowl into the trash can in the kitchen, hands multitasking as he also picks up his hat and mask from the desk.

Mark’s looking back to the direction of your bedroom while he puts his mask on, fixing the hat onto his head. The image of your slightly messy bedhead and cute pout appears in his head and he’s shaking his head, lips parting to let out a chuckle. “One day, they’ll know about us.”

The sun’s rays wake you up from your sleep, groaning at the light that hits your eyes. Your joints and muscles protest when you sit up in bed, wanting nothing but to go back to sleep. Your legs hit the floor, slightly trembling when you feel the cold wood in contrast to your warm temperature, and you’re walking out of your room in search of your boyfriend and your phone.

The dinging from the kitchen catches your attention and you make a beeline for it, doing a slight victory dance when you find your phone on the kitchen counter right next to some chocolate you’re sure you didn’t have yesterday.

You have new messages.

[3:11] You sent a message to “Lover” Boy Nana.

Stop messaging MY girlfriend at 3 AM, Na.

[3:12] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message. 

omo omo hyung no need to be so grumpy

[3:12] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message. 

im just “dating” her not  d a t i n g  her

[3:13] “Lover” Boy Nana sent a message. 

come back to the dorms before manager realizes you’re gone

[3:14] You sent a message to “Lover” Boy Nana. 

yeah yeah omw

[3:39] Lee MinMark sent a message. 

I’m sorry I didn’t stay over! Don’t want you getting in more trouble

[3:40] Lee MinMark sent a message. 

Good night, and I love you.

[7:45] Boss Manager sent a message. 

Meeting at 10. Don’t be late.

The smile that spreads on your face is automatic and the giddiness feels like a wake up call from your previously still drowsy self. Your fingers work nimbly, tapping out words to text Mark before a text arrives just before you sent it.

You have new messages.

[8:13] Lee MinMark sent a message. 

“I fought my eyes

to stay awake.

No dream

was prettier

than the way she slept.”

[8:13] You changed Lee MinMark’s name to Lion Cub.

[8:13] You sent a message to Lion Cub.

I knew you were jealous!

[8:14] Lion Cub sent a message.

Good morning to you too. Sleep well?

[8:14] You sent a message to Lion Cub.

I did! Would’ve been better with you next to me tho :(

[8:14] You sent a message to Lion Cub.

Also that poem is just ugh :(

[8:23] You sent a message to Lion Cub.

Mark? Where did you go?

[8:25]  Pwark Ji-Ji sent a message.

mark hyung banned me from texting you for a week :(

[8:25]  Pwark Ji-Ji sent a message. 

why is he like this :(

[8:25]  Pwark Ji-Ji sent a message. 

so mean :(

[8:26]  Pwark Ji-Ji sent a message.

this is nana btw! hyung’s taking a shower rn and jisung let me borrow his phone eheh

[8:26]  Pwark Ji-Ji sent a message.

no, actually i lied. i stole it from him

[8:26]  Pwark Ji-Ji sent a message.

have a good day, lovie!! ill see you later at that meeting (mark hyung doesnt know btw eheheh)

[8:26] You sent a message to Pwark Ji-Ji.

You’re horrible, Na! Give sungiie his phone back :(

[8:26] You sent a message to Pwark Ji-Ji. 

See you later!! (Also, hi sungiie!!)

[pappydaddy]

Heather (j.m.)

A/N: I guess I’m back? I never really left, I was just kinda without internet and then I just completely lost all concept of time. Like I am not kidding, I have no idea what day it is. But anyway, I am working on my Steve Harrington series and trying to get the third part out soon and I have a bunch of ideas for imagines so I am going to be working on those, trying to get those out as soon as possible. This piece is inspired by sad bitch hours bc I like listening to sad songs even if I’m not sad?? So, this is inspired by Heather by Conan Gray. I also love writing sad angst after long breaks for some reason. ANYWAY, enjoy and check out the song bc Conan Gray is amazing. 

Show/Movie: Outer Banks

Pairing: JJ Maybank x Reader 

Warnings: Sad, angst, longing, negative thoughts about oneself (appearance, personality, etc), comparing to other people, jealousy, unspoken feelings

I think I’m going to do a part two, maybe even a part three, idk, we’ll see!

Link to an edited youtube video of this song (I used this one to write with)

Link to Spotify version of this song 

Part One - You’re here! | Part Two

masterlist | taglist | wips | navigation

- not my gif -

  The cool ocean breeze blew past her as she sat on a piece of driftwood, the sound of waves lapping up onto the wet sand inches away from her bare feet calmed her. The beginnings of a party stirred the peaceful silence up behind her, disrupting the calm the ocean set. Her friends were up by the bonfire they started, talking and laughing about something. Y/N was torn. She didn’t know if she was sad to be missing out on the fun or if she was glad she didn’t need to plaster on her fake smile she usually had to wear around her. The newest addition to their small, tight-knit group. Normally, one of the boy’s flings wouldn’t affect her like this, but when it’s the blonde-haired, blue-eyed boy bringing them around, she couldn’t help but feel her heart-breaking each time. 

  She had tried to deny her feeling for a long time, mostly because she knew that he’d never get into a serious relationship, it was just the way JJ was; the second reason was because of the rule: no Pogue on Pogue macking. Of course, the rule was able to give her a reason to keep her feelings a secret from everyone, but it was also what made her hurt so much. If she could just tell someone about her feelings, she’d be able to sit up there by the warm fire with her friends, laughing and joking with them. Instead, she kept her mouth shut about her feelings and she distanced herself from them whenever she was there. 

  Y/N hugged herself, wrapping herself up in warmth. The thin sweater she wore didn’t do much against the fall wind attacking her along with the breeze blowing off the ocean. Nights were colder, the summer humidity disappearing quickly, but it didn’t stop the teens from partying into the night. Glancing over her shoulder, she snuck a glance at her friends. Her eyes, without fail, went right to JJ. His arm was slung around her, his beautiful smile on his face, his adam’s apple bouncing as he retold an embarrassing story about John B who laughed loudly. She was sitting just far enough away that she couldn’t hear the words they were saying, but she could hear their barking laughter. 

  She watched them, she was beautiful. She was Heather. The new girl. Y/N had nothing against her other than the fact that she had JJ, even if it was going to be over with by the end of this month. JJ never stuck around relationships for too long, but it didn’t mean they hurt Y/N any less. How could Y/N compete with her? Her long black hair blowing in the wind as if she was out of a movie, her striking blue eyes, her perfectly freckled face that looked like an Instagram filter. Y/N would never be as pretty as Heather in her mind. 

  Y/N’s laid-back, hippie/surfer attitude was no match for Heather, nor were her looks. Heather was beautiful inside out. While the casing looked like she was scalped by the Greek Goddesses, her personality was like she was filled with sunshine and rainbows. No matter when you saw her, she always had a kind smile. She was perfect: smart, kind, popular, pretty. It was as if is was impossible to hate her. She was too kind to. 

  Standing from her piece of driftwood, Y/N decided that she wasn’t in the mood to be at a party. Grabbing her shoes from the sand by her feet, she made her way along the water, not wanting to walk past her friends and have to answer questions. She didn’t want to spare a glance in Heather’s direction, not wanting to see JJ’s sweater on her. The same sweater he gave her last December. 

  Shivers ran up her spine as they all laid in the hammocks at The Chateau. While it was winter, they still decided to go out and stargaze after smoking the blunt JJ had just rolled. In their stoned haste to stare at the stars, Y/N had forgotten to bring a sweater or even a blanket, leaving her shivering in the hammock she shared with JJ since he broke his a few days ago. 

  JJ, having noticed her shivering since she was shaking the hammock - making its swing choppy, sat up. “Here,” He sat up, making her look up at him curiously. While they were slightly buzzed, they were still able to think since they were used to the stuff JJ gets. “Take my sweater, you’re freezing.” He told her, forcing her to sit up and put his sweater on. The dark fabric (while thin) warmed her perfectly but she wasn’t sure if it was because it came off of JJ’s body or if she was just that cold.

  “No, JJ, I can’t, you’ll get cold!” She protested, moving to take it off and give it back, but JJ stopped her, zipping it up to make it harder for her to get off. 

  “You’ve got to now, it looks much better on you and it’ll just be embarrassing if I wore it after you did,” He winked, settling back down, his hands clasped behind his head, his elbows sticking out, blocking where her head was supposed to go. “Plus, since I don’t have a sweater, it just means I need you to cuddle me to keep me warm now.” He smirked, his eyes staying on the stars. With a blush heating her face, Y/N laid back, her head resting on his chest, her arm resting over his stomach.

  It was just polyester, but it made her think that there was just a slightest bit of hope that maybe he liked her back. She liked to replay that day over in her head, her mind creating a figment of her imagination - a fictional ending where they ended up together, but since Heather showed up, she stomped all over it with her angel feet, but in the nicest way possible. 

  Sand kicked up on the backs of her heels, sliding off easily as she walked along the beach. She wondered if anyone noticed that she left, if JJ noticed she left. She doubted it, they were all mesmerized by Heather and her amazing personality while Y/N was off drowning in her own vast ocean of sadness. Looking behind her, she could faintly make the group out, spotting the crackling fire spitting sparks into the sky as started to bleed with fading pinks and oranges. They looked like specks, but she could tell that they were still laughing as if she hadn’t left. Sighing, she made her way up the dune, walking through the cluster of trees and onto the sidewalk, walking against the sea of people making their way towards the party. 

 ____

  She was working the next time she saw them. She was trapped and forced to sit there watching them. Of course, she was inside the restaurant while the couple stood outside on the deck, waiting for Pope and John B. Kiara was inside, finishing her shift up. Y/N’s eye caught on them as she grabbed her table their drinks. They were standing there, deep in conversation, their hands clasped together. She couldn’t take her eyes off them as their lips met in a long kiss. Her mind wondered. Why would he ever want to kiss her after having such a perfect girl in his arms? 

  Y/N wanted to hate her, she really did, but she couldn’t. “Y/N, you’re spilling the water everywhere,” Her co-worker exclaimed, jumping towards her with a dry dishtowel, sopping up the mess. She jolted in shock, his voice snapping her out of her daze. “Your clothes are soaked.” He fussed, trying to help dry her hand. Her eyes glanced back up from the mess at the deck entrance dinging, alerting them of someone entering. The group walked in, JJ and Heather in the back of John B and Pope. 

  “Hi, Y/N! Where is your section?” John B called out, wanting to be served by his friend as an excuse to see her since he hadn’t talked to her in a while. 

  “Sorry, John B, I’ll have to take your table so she can get cleaned up, next time.” Her co-worker told them, getting another dry towel to try and help her dry her clothes so she wasn’t dripping everywhere. John B pressed his lips together into a line, nodding with disappointment. 

  “Thanks, Jack,” John B nodded his chin in Jack’s direction. “Maybe we’ll talk before we leave, Y/N.” She looked back up from her shirt, nodding. Her eyes caught on JJ, their eyes connecting as Heather talked to Kie (who had just came out of the back), not noticing. It certainly was a sight for sore eyes, JJ’s eyes were, but it was gone as fast as it came. 

  “That should be good, Y/N,” Jack brought her back, making their eyes connect. His eyes were just a gorgeous as JJ’s, but they didn’t take her breath away like JJ’s did. He smiled at her, his eyes sparkling with happiness. His smile was show-stopping, but it didn’t effect her like JJ’s did. “You should go get changed, I’ll take these to the table for you, table four, right?” 

  “Yeah, thanks Jack, I owe you one.” She called to him, disappearing into the back, thankful that she always brought a change of clothes and thankful that she didn’t have to serve them. Though, she knew that she shift was going to be mostly trying not to even look towards their table, she was happy she didn’t have to go through standing at their table, working even harder at her fake smile so she didn’t show them that she was dying inside while she felt like she wanted to rip her feet off because they were so sore. 

 ____

  It was at school, she had seen the whole thing. Lost in the crowd, she stood there watching as Heather weeped. She could tell that JJ was embarrassed, he had tried to do it quickly and in private, but Heather’s load sobs and gasps drew the first few people then they drew the rest of the crowd. Even with a mixture of tears and makeup rolling down her perfect skin, Heather was the figure of beauty. Now, Y/N was certain - she’d never stand a chance with JJ Maybank, even after he broke up with Heather, for Y/N wasn’t half as pretty as her. 

  Heather pushed through the crowd, trying to get away from JJ. She pushed between Y/N and Jack, who stood beside her, his books hanging by his hip, Y/N’s books in his other hand. “Poor Heather, poor JJ. He actually looks like he tried to break up nicely this time. He must have cared for her at least a little.” He commented, observing the blonde boy while the group dispersed, giving him a perfect view of the two. 

  “Who wouldn’t care for her, she’s an angel.” Y/N muttered, her eyes connecting with JJ’s. A sympathetic smile stretched onto her face, feeling sorry for him. Their eyes never separated, the two of them standing still, just absorbed in their eye contact. 

  “Come on, Y/N, let’s go. We can’t be late for our shift.” Jack told her, forcing her to break away from JJ’s eyes. She looked up at him, nodding before turning and walking the short distance to his pick-up, climbing in. Jack tossed their books in the bed, along with their bags, slipping onto the bench seat next to her. Turning to gaze out the window, she saw JJ staring at her, still standing in the same spot. Their eyes connected once again in a fleeting moment before Jack slowly pulled out of the spot, exiting the nearly empty parking lot. 

[rarebowgart]

Writeblr Introduction

Hi hello hey how ya doing! My name is Remington and I'm a new writeblr, I just want to share my stories somewhere other than my friends DMs asfdhakdk

I write mostly fantasy and adventure type stuff, and a lot of the things I write are coping stuffs because we got mental illnes luv x

Other Places To Find Me

my main blog is @rarewubbox (you'll find my carrd there as well if you want more info about me!)

my art blog is @c0ttonberries

my AO3 is ToTheMax

Current Wips Under Da Cut (because this got long)

No Name, Fair Game- a story about a boy named Colt-Lynx who runs away from home, meets a cute girl named DeLaney, and they go riding on a train to escape his old life. DeLaney isn't everything she claims to be, however, but Colt-Lynx doesn't seem to notice. The only people that can tell that something is off is the quartet of strange humanoids that they've acquainted themselves with on the train. Full of Drama, Fantasy, and of course the recommended amount of Gay

LOVE–LOVE- a High School Romance story between tennis players on rival teams. Lee is the charismatic yet forgetful heartthrob, and Cliff is the pessimistic yet caring stuffed animal doctor. When their schools agree to have an after-school program dedicated to preaching good sportsmanship, the teams have no choice but to get together and mingle. Lee and Cliff start to realize that they don't mind each others company, despite being supposed rivals. This is just gay high schoolers in love what else do you want from me

Infamous Weapons 101 [title might change]- This is another high school story about a group of juniors who decide the adults aren't going to do anything about their dangerous school system, which encourages burnout, coming to school sick, and- worst of all- coming to school while there's a serial killer at large. These kids have to put their personal squabbles and family drama aside, because now lies a threat that only they seem to care about dispatching, and they can only do this together. This is planned to become a webcomic to be a social commentary on the American school system and all of its fatal flaws, with a wide variety of humanoid and animal characters. There's angels, demons, furries, zombie dogs, and everything in between!

Chërophobia- Chëro is a doll that came to life after being thrown into a dumpster for the millionth time. He wanders into the forest and meets a ghost, who brings him to the wonderful lightshow of Meinstro and Family's Bright-And-Wild Circus! There, he finds a home and people genuinely worth caring for, who won't chuck him in the trash. The only problem is... he's caught up in the family drama now. It turns out the ringleader of this circus he cares about has to carry her parent's burden and answer for their crimes against other circus families around town. This WIP can be summed up as "if I had a nickel for every time I met a family who ran a slaughterhouse disguised as a circus in the woods, I'd have... three nickels. Which isn't a lot but its horrifying that I've met three of them." Oh yeah did I mention the circus is a slaughterhouse? Thats kind of important. I'm writing this with a good and close friend of mine and we've been working on the story for a good long while now!

I also have a smattering of other fics and ocs so I might post about those later but here's my Main Writings!

No Better Version Of Me; a Henry Stickmin Fanfic- this is the only fic I'm putting up here bc its the only one I'm actively publishing lmao. It takes place after The Revenged ending in Henry Stickmin: Completing the Mission. I'll refrain from spoilers but there's DRAMA, ACTION, and MAYBE ROMANCE BUT NOT A LOT OF IT. I have my own separate blog for this fic here @nbvom

[CURRENTLY UNNAMED]- A boarding school far away from any neighboring society finds themselves in trouble when students and teachers alike start turning up dead on the courtyard. They'd call the police, but the phone lines are cut. They'd e-mail for help, but something is trapping their signal. Three assumed targets of this unknown killer are placed under a rudimentary bodyguard program, so now these rowdy music majors are going to have to coexist with the prim, proper and intimidatingly dark students of their Academia majors. (Everything about this is still under heavy development but I've had this idea for like literal years)