#bastard can talk
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Smallest of headcannons but I think Stan and Ford always stand beside eachother in a specific way, like Stan always stands with Ford to his right because he can hear better on that side, and Ford always stands with stan to his left because he’s nearly blind on his right.
They don’t realize the other is purposely standing like this until they ask each other sometime before they go out to sea, after that it’s sort of a small comfort thing for them to stand on their specific sides and be able to see/hear the other clearly
#bastard can talk#.headcannons#headcannons#gravity falls#stanford pines#Stanley pines#Ford pines#stan pines
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Fit: Oh yeah, the great outdoors! All we need is a can of beans, and we'll have a good time.
Phil: There's two empty seats, I can't remember what– who they're for though. [Snorts then leans off-screen and laughs]
Fit: [Slowly realizes what Phil said] ...No. No. No. No! No! NO! WE ARE NOT DOING THIS RIGHT NOW! WE ARE NOT DOING THIS, PHIL. Ok? We are not doing this.
Sneeg: Do you wanna talk about it...?
Phil: [Continues laughing]
Fit: No man, this- this man thinks trauma is funny. He thinks trauma is funny– He thinks interpersonal emotional trauma is funny! Yeah, we're all laughing, Phil. We're all laughing. Yeah– [Monotone voice] "Hahaha! So funny." So funny. So funny.
Sneeg: Alright, bro. Why don't you go–
Fit: Gaslight girlboss, right? Yeah, that's what we do, that's what we do.
Phil: Oh my god– [Exhales and laughs] That tickled me, that was a good one. Uh, right–
#Philza#FitMC#Sneegsnag#JoeSMP#QSMP#(Implied / mentioned)#Fit#Sneeg#Phil#Joe SMP#Honestly if he'd killed Phil for this I don't think any of us would blame him for this#I'm glad this server has a bounty system so I can pull out my wallet and be like ''Guards; kill this clown''#/hj#He's SUCH a bastard#Didn't have a chance to post this yesterday sorry#Edited#I saw someone say they thought he was referring to Missa / Pac but honestly I think he was talking about the Eggs#could go either way though#TBH I think cubito Phil knows damn well what he's talking about and remembers everything#He's just the embodiment of that ''Sometimes I can still hear his voice'' / '' I'm not dead!'' meme
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I’m sending this anonymously but this is NOT anon hate
You are such a good person, i think. Your latest post(as of 4:10pm Arizona, US time) spoke to me really hard. My father is a cop, in the united states, arizona, duh. And he used to be such a good person, he was a security guard and a damn good one too, and later in he became a prison guard because it paid better, and then he joined the police force.
I’d like to think that hes one of the good ones, and for the most part he is. A lot of my delinquent friends over the years who’ve had run-ins with him say that he gets them breaks, he takes care of them, hes a good cop. I’ve even seen body camera footage of him in the field and i’m proud to say that hes my dad. He calls out bad actors where he sees them, and he gets punished for it. He doesnt see the system or how his punishments are by design. And he continues turning in his cog, begrudgingly, and slightly out of time, but he thinks hes making a difference
Sorry for the ramble and essay, i just wanted to say that i really like your blog and i think you are a very nice human being. Thank you for sharing your perspective.
P.s. i’m totally basing an oc off of your outlook on security. You strike me as more of a superhero than a security guard.
-🦕 anon
Oh, that’s a super flattering take and a valuable perspective- so thank you! But I’m a gullible dumbass, and not even an incredibly smart or fit one- I just want people to be happy and safe. That’s all. And I don’t want to BE a cop, I’ve NEVER wanted to be a cop, but every time the request comes around I feel like I’m wearing down.
I keep wondering if I could help MORE in a position like that.
Probably like your dad did.
Here, people know they’re safe with me because I shut down the gunhappy jerks, but I don’t know how long it would take to truly make a difference in public security, or how many of my morals I’d have to compromise to get to that point
I feel objectively like a system so archaic and flawed can’t be changed from the inside, but another part of me says that you don’t need to change an entire system to make a difference where it counts
I believe that so many bad situations and life-changing moments can be diverted or changed by a single person in the right place at the right time- and I figure, if I trust myself to do the right thing and BE the right person, shouldn’t I do my best to put myself in those places?
But good intentions, roads to hell, you know? I don’t WANT to be a cop. But I want to be able to DO SOMETHING about the thinks I dislike seeing in conflicts. SOMEONE has to be willing to do that, right?
I’m not religious, you know? But the devil can be very convincing
#I don’t trust cops#I’ve met bad cops#but a lot of bad things have been done by people in systems of power willing to go against orders#And boy howdy am I good at going against orders#And I like people#I genuinely like people#The hero thing is very kind of you#But mostly I just like feeling like I can make things better#We all need to believe that we can make things better#idk#I’ve met shit cops#But ive also met shit guards#And here I am as a guard#stealing their place#so as long as I’m here#they can’t be#I outrank the bastards now#So they have no power#Is that a healthy five year plan#or do I need to talk to my therapist some more#Fuck my life I’m tired#Do you think your dad was a good person anon?#Do you think he made the world better?#Teablart#tagging for later
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"He said that's your style. Never quite lies, clever half-truths that let you convince yourself you're doing the right thing."
#scenes that make you feel insane in retrospect. scenes that make you say 'oh you motherfucker' out loud in real life#it took me three playthroughs to see the way his eyes shift as he realizes you don't know yet and that he can Use That Against You#tfw you killed one of the last people on the planet that actually thought of you as a friend and savable and who you deeply respected#but his idiot protege doesn't know he's dead yet and you're a bastard who WILL take advantage#the way the scene darkens when he finishes talking is actually crazy too. idk if that was purposeful but it's evil#i love him a lot unfortunately#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#datv spoilers#datvedit#solas dragon age#solas#veilguard#**da
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here's the thing about Ludinus Da'leth: if I was bombarded by shitty holographic televangelists at random on a daily basis on my way to the fucking grocery store, no matter what they were trying to sell me, I'd start biting.
#if it persisted. I would not stop at biting.#he's just annoying! he's just an annoying bastard!#we can talk forever about his opinions but before we even get there#he's a shitty televangelist who paid for unskippable ad space on the gas station screen#and i do not want him to talk i want him DEAD#cr spoilers#ludinus da'leth
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Some more Frollo stuff I did during chemistry lesson instead of paying attention.
I'm definitely failing this class ( •ᴗ•)
#Frollo talking in italian sounds so funny to me idk why#hell he can probably speak that#erudite bastard#somebody get this man out of my head I can't focus on anything 🫠#claude frollo#frollo#judge claude frollo#the hunchback of notre dame#thond#my art
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Finally decided to make a bit of a ref sheet for the riptide goobers bc I keep changing their designs every time I draw them. These are for post ep 87 btw, designs for before then will come in the near future (maybe).
Back sketches and alternative versions of the designs under cut (contains spoilers up to ep 115)
I also give you badly drawn Pretzel
#The sillies#yippie#can you tell i only added the notes bc i wanted to talk about gillion's design#the dyslexia hit hard today#had to look up how to spell simplified for this#shoutout to my friend who gave me some pointers despite not giving a shit about these characters#she was the real mvp#okay actual tags time#jrwi riptide#jrwi fanart#artwork#treart#art#jrwi#jrwi chip#chip jrwi#jay jrwi#jrwi gillion#jrwi spoilers#jrwi show#just roll with it#just roll with it fanart#chip bastard#just roll with it riptide#gillion tidestrider#gillion#riptide#chip#just roll with it gillion#gillion fanart
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Stanford never became friends with Fiddleford.
Instead he got himself a different small friend group who cares a lot about him. At least about the Ford he pretended to be in college.
A kind, soft spoken formerly bullied genius who researches very dull stuff in Oregon and definitely not anything weird. Their Ford would never break any rules or ignore safety measures [unlike that other student they heard about during their college years.]
And then Ford stops answering their calls and loses his grant.
It’s time for an intervention and they start pestering Ford with letters and calls until he finally agrees to meet them at a science convention, but he’ll take his brother with him.
They’re relieved! Ford is with Shermie! They like Shermie! It's a good thing that Ford still has one brother who isn't a good for nothing selfish criminal who destroyed his entire future!
If they ever get their hands on Ford’s evil twin they’ll make sure he’ll regret ever messing with their friend. Ford is too nice for revenge. They aren’t.
Meanwhile at the not-yet Mystery Shack, the Stans freshly survived their own angsty canon divergent tale of two stans AU and locked Bill out of Ford's mind like a week ago.
Stan: I don’t know how long Ford will keep me around but this will be good for him. He needs some friends to take care of him after I inevitably get kicked out again!
Ford: I only agreed to this because Stan insisted and I still haven’t found a way to thank him and apologize. I hope all my “friends” die in a fire.
#gravity falls#stanley pines#stanford pines#I need Ford to be a bit off a bastard im this one. But can we blame him?#The poor guy did so much research about how to fit in with his peers before going to college and it worked too well.#He regretted it almost instantly once he realised he had to keep this up for the next couple of years.#He had to pretend to like all the popular music and movies and girls#and partying#instead of spending his weekends solving the greatest mysteries of the universe.#he constantly had to tell himself that this is what he wants. He needs to fit in and be liked if he ever wants to be recognized by his peer#Of course Fords friends have it instantly out for Stan and can you blame them? Ford looks like he hasn’t slept in weeks#hides mysterious injuries and his brother refuses to leave Fords side ven at night#[Poor Ford is just simply too scared to go to sleep without Stan protecting him]#They all come to horrifying conclusions about Stan. Poor Stan might even agree with them. Also#Ford: uses slang and bad grammar Stan: SHIT WHO DID FORD GET POSSESSED BY NOW???#Eventually an anamoly or a science experiment gone wrong happens during the convention and Ford is all over it immediately#pulls out a new journal#spouts out theories faster than anyone can keep up with and runs closer to the madness with no regard to his#or everyone elses safety Fords friends stare after him disbelieving and scared out of their minds Stan next to them sighs “Ford#amirite?#Welp better go and make sure he doesn’t get himself killed” and runs after Ford.#Eventtually in all the chaos Ford and Stan get rescued by a kind man in a giant mech dinosaur. Ford and the new guy hit it off immediately#and solve everything with just a little bit more destuction that might’ve been necessary. It was all for the sake of science.#Stan takes a long look at the robot guy. “Yep#he’ll do. Seems much more Ford’s style”#and throws him into the Stanleymobile together with Ford and escapes before the police arrive.#Ford and the new guy barely notice as they keep on talking nerd stuff. Easiest kidnapping of Stans life.#He knew coming here was a great idea. And thus the mystery trio was born.
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I found the Bastard’s Box!


Inside


#it’s a Trekbest Money Maze Puzzle Box#the bastard box#time bastard#ted spankoffski#tinky#t’noy karaxis#hatchetfield#hatchetfield universe#hatchetverse#starkid#nerdy prudes must die#npmd#bastard’s box#the arcane cat can talk
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Otherkin Ford otherkin Ford otherkin Ford otherkin Ford otherkin Ford Otherkin Ford otherkin Ford otherkin Ford otherkin Fo-
#bastard can talk#chanting it over and over again like im summoning something#gravity falls#Ford is specifically Cryptidkin Critterkin and Creaturekin#it doesn’t know any actual terms/words but it’s always felt very connected to cryptids and like it was one growing up#and after going and traveling in the portal it started feeling very creature like#this is very intertwined with feral Ford headcannons btw#he’s always felt off and didn’t do anything before the portal but after going feral during his travels he has the ability and instincts#for noises and such and always acts a little bit animalistic#after he comes to terms with them he very much embraces them and just loves being able to make little noises#Ford pines#stanford pines#feral ford#.headcannons
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FINALLY. He has something beneath the shoulders 🎉
#my art!#purples art!#fanart!#not mine!#Bobby Fulbright#ace attorney dual destinies#he gets NO BACKGROUND though I’ve already sacrificed enough for you#capricious little bastard. I’m gonna draw him as a gummy next so I can chew on him#I’ve been talking about chewing on gummies a lot recently actually I think I have a candy craving
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You know, the AAI2 fandom’s insistence on referring to the characters by their fan localized names we’ve had for like a decade instead of the ones we received this week is really funny. It almost reminds me of something…

God damn it.
#ace attorney#aai#aai2#aa investigations#aai collection#ace attorney series#ace attorney shitpost#ace attorney posting#ace attorney investigations#yumihiko ichiyanagi#sebastian debeste#eustace winner#courage the cowardly dog#raymond shields#eddie fender#justine courtney#verity gavelle#real talk: the name Eustace is kind of growing on me. it has the even more pathetic energy than both Yumihiko/Sebastian.#still prefer the fan names though.#that and since I’m a microbiology major I know that ‘eu-‘ as a prefix in biology usually means ‘true’ so it connects to Verity/Justine#and I think that’s kinda cute :)#winner however can go burn.#Eustace will never replace Sebastian I am simply adding it to my list of names to refer to the kid.#<- a list which so far includes: 4kids Akechi. Laywer Iruma-kun. Fluffy Little Bastard. Tall Child. Disconnected Tellytubby. Herr Fluffy.#and now Eustace and Stacey have been added to the mix.#what are some others please add.
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I finished my current sketchbook last night and wanted to post some of my favorite doodles in there :-)
there's so so many more in there that I didn't take photos if so I'm probably gonna post a bunch in phases
so I guess sketchbook reveal 1/?
#bandit's doodles#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#caspian jrwi#chip bastard#chip jrwi#jay ferin#jrwi Marshall John#whenever I read through my sketchbook you can clearly see blocks of hyperfixations#like it’s so unintentionally organized#first section is hermitcraft#then riptide#couple pages of sky colt ocs me and a friend made like a year ago#then it goes pd and apotheosis#(the riptide section was the longest clearly that’s my biggest hyperfixation/spin rn obviously)#there’s also little arcs in the sections#like you can see the couple days I was obsessed with swordfish#also I like to think Gil and Caspian got those fish pajamas together in joaldo#this one lasted from July to yesterday so I think that’s a pretty good run right#not too long and not too short#that thing is so loaded with bullshit it’s insane#get hyped bandit prime defenders and apotheosis art posting soon#I’m on episode 28 of pd right now I think#alright I’m just talking now I need to stop myself#(bandit learns self restraint? nah)
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astarion origin playthrough worth it just for all the extra moments where he does the "sad wet cat" face
#bg3#bg3 spoilers#thoughts about media#astarion#*kisses his forehead* my awful little bastard man... i love you and your big sad watery eyes.#IT'S SO FUCKING QUIET THOUGH IF YOU YOURSELF ARE PLAYING HIM GOOD LORD#I'M SO USE TO HIM COMPLAINING TO MY TAV!!!!#OR BANTERING WITH HIM OR KARLACH OR WYLL!!!#I MISS HIS THEATRICS!!!!!!!#not that it's ENTIRELY quiet. until i found karlach i was travelling with shadowheart lae'zel and gale.#and let me tell you. gale and lae'zel do NOT shut the fuck up if they are together.#they were literally having an entire tinder date while we were trecking through the woods to go get karlach.#i NEVER knew they talk so much because while i've travelled with them individually in past saves...#...i've NEVER had them in my party at the same time!#gale is actually pretty nice to lae'zel! he asks a lot of questions but doesn't condescend her as he does others sometimes.#that's probably because he's afraid of her though. I would be too were I nothing more than a wizard with 8 strength.#I do like how you can look at pretty much any two companions and get a well written and generally enjoyable dynamic!#It feels like they considered that a lot of people would want to maybe pair off the companions they didn't romance with each other!#and wanted it to be easy for really any pairing to work... if a person just paid attention to their shared interactions.
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Darry 'Pack it in' Curtis n Dallas 'Tighten the fuck up' Winston are unstoppable 'getting Pony to wrap it up' duo
#darrys trying to get pony to do something n pony starts whining n hes like wrap it UP pony just do it#n pony is a stubborn bastard so hes like no 🫶#n dallas walks in n is IMMEDIATELY like pony tighten the FUCK up n stop acting like a brat#n u know what?#he tightens the fuck up#or dallas is like bitch just do this thing#n ponys like UR not the boss of me!#n darry appears from no where to be like pack THAT SHIT UP#they never talk about it#but they are a powerhouse duo#bc pony is a lil scared of dallas n when hes not darry can be the clean up crew#darry curtis#dallas winston#ponyboy curtis#the outsiders#when dallas doesnt think darry is being a stick in the mud that is#n darry doesnt think dallas is acting like a hoodlum
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tma au where the apocalypse ritual doesn’t work because there’s one (1) typo in the statement document at the very end. Like Jon reads the whole ritual but it fails because the last line says “I opem the door” and so the door opems (not a real word in English) instead of opening and from then on any time Jonah Magnus shows “his” face (not actually his, because he is old and a face-stealing whore) in public everyone points and laughs at him for making a typo in the evil fear apocalypse ritual
#tma#the magnus archives#he’d totally be into that shit too#that evil old man with his voyeuristic eldritch eyeball fetish….#he’d probably be like “oho! the loathing and judgment of everyone around me is going straight to….the penis….what jolly good time!”#or however British people talk idk#sorry but y’all talk a little silly. always talking about “taking the piss”#what the FUCK are you bastards doing with all that piss???#I know you’re up to something. something involving all that piss#you won’t get away with it. not this time#can anyone hear me?
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