#bake as normal for 25 minutes

[margridarnauds]

My Good Thing for this week is that I finally rediscovered my old technique of double-baking my pasta bakes to give the cheese an added crispiness -- I was terrified I’d lost the technique forever before finding the recipe on the Tesco’s page. 

[imdead770]

The Outsiders x Reader Headcannons

♡ Random things the gang would do if you dated them ♡

Darry -

He's fixing everything for you. Your shelf broke? Give him 15 minutes. Your car broke? He'll get Sodapop to fix it up for you. Your heart broke? He's fixing it. This man is Fix-it Felix.

♡

I feel like he wouldn't be the biggest PDA guy, but if you're both alone, he's probably holding you in some way shape or form. Your back against his chest, your head on his shoulder with his arm around you, it's happening and he's perfectly happy with it.

Sodapop -

I don't know why, but I feel like Sodapop picked a specific night for both of you to just spend time together and relax. Probably a Saturday night since he won't have to worry about work. It's just a night where you sit together, eat ice cream, and watch a movie. He'll hold you and quietly talk to you, randomly peppering kisses on your face.

^ this makes me so lovesick holy shit ^

♡

This man is HUGE on pda. He'll hold your hand, have his arm around your waist, kiss your forehead. As long as you're comfortable with it, he'll shower you with affection 25/8

Ponyboy -

He WILL watch sunsets with you. He'll take your hand, run you outside to his porch and sit on the steps with you. Your head rested on his shoulder with his arm around your waist.

" You were right Pony.. it's beautiful.. "

" Not as beautiful as you.. "

I know it's cliche but stfu

♡

I feel like he isn't really used to PDA, so he doesn't really initiate it. But the moment you do anything, from holding his jaw as you kiss him to entertwining your fingers with his, his heart melts. With a bit of time, he'll return the favor, he just needs to get comfortable.

Johnny -

I don't know if this is accurate, but I feel like he'd bring you flowers. No reason, he just wanted to bring his girl flowers. He'll bring you your favorite if he can. If he can't find some he'll pick the prettiest ones he can find. You had to buy a vase for just how often he brings you flowers.

♡

We all know this boy is shy, but I feel like once he warms up to you PDA is just normal. Not big PDA like Soda, but he likes holding your hand in public. In private he'll hold you against him, play with your hair, the whole thing.

Dallas -

He takes you to so many of Buck's parties it's not even funny. You're bored? He'll take you to go dance. You're stressed? He'll sit at the bar and drink with you. You don't drink? Well shit.

☆ On the dancing note, he's not a huge dancer, but he'll stand beside you to make sure nobody steps out of line. He also 100% watches your ass while you sway your hips. Probably grinds if we're being honest.

♡

On the PDA side, he isn't big on it, in public or in private. Gotta maintain that tough guy image. He might have his hand in your back pocket or around your hip. In private he won't be big on it at first, but after a bit he might hold you. Not like hold-hold, but he'll put his arms around you.

Two-Bit -

I swear on my life, this man will throw the worst pick-up lines at you. He doesn't care that you're already dating, he'll do it.

" Yknow, if you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber. "

" Two-Bit, I love you, but shut the fuck up. "

♡

PDA wise, he'll do it. That's about it. He'll do it. He wouldn't make out with you on the spot, but he'll hold you, kiss you on the cheek, whatever. He'll do it.

Steve -

He'd try to bake with you. This isn't a regular thing, but I think since he likes chocolate cake so damn much, he'd decide to make it. He just decided to bring you along for the ride. To summarize it, it was a mess.

" Steve.. when did that milk expire? "

" Says.. December, why? "

" What year, Steve. "

" ... Ohhh.. "

♡

This mf is just a leveled-down Dallas ( in the best way possible ). He acts all tough/tuff but would do subtle acts. Hands around your waist, intertwining his fingers with yours, the basics. In private he'd definitely hold you, though.

I love them all so much

[niefics]

Coffe shop — PSH & FEM!Y/N

Warnings : Cursing, fluff, smut, Reader is 22, sunghoon is 25, public sex, unprotected sex

Synopsis : F/N L/N started a summer job for extra money during their break at a coffee shop, and falls for their boss Sunghoon.

Word count : 2872, I’m so sorry this took me so long idk

— A tired groan leaves your body as you hear the noise of your alarm going off. Sitting up and turning it off to see what time it was. You fought going back to sleep, but you knew you had work that day.

You got up, walking into your bathroom and got into the shower trying to wake your tired self up. After getting out the shower you got ready for the day, getting ready in just enough time to get there on time.

“Good morning Y/N.” A deep calm voice said as you opened the door. “Morning, sunghoon.” You spoke to your boss. You were on the hunt for a job for a while especially for summer to save up for things that financial aid wouldn’t be paying for, you walked into the break room and put your stuff away grabbing a clean apron and wrapping it sound your figure. “So what year of collage are you in ?” He asked, trying to make casual conversation. “I’m going into my 3rd year sir.” You spoke. You normally keep your conversations very casual and work related, there’s really not a reason but you just chose to.

“Y/n, can you please set out those baked goods out on the display before the shop opens ? I made a new batch this morning.” He spoke you nodded, walking to the the case taking anything old out and throwing it away, cleaning it and everything. You added the new foods and and started working on making sure the floor was good before opening for the day. “Everything should be ready for the day to start, I’ll go open the door.” You spoke unlocking it, and going to the back of the counter setting up the register, and relaxing for a moment till costumers showed up.

After about 20 minutes, you hear a door open making you look up, you see a mom and her child walk in. “Hi, what can I get you this morning ?” You spoke giving them both a calm smile. “Uhm yes, can I get a hot chocolate, and a ice latte please ?” She spoke, she looked at her child one more time before saying that’s all with her order. “Can I get a cake pop ?” Her child asked. She nodded, and asked for one pink cake pop. You nodded, putting her order in and giving her the total, the price seemed bigger then what it normally was before you told her so you checked everything before realizing that the machine put 2 of everything down when you only did one. “Uhm one second please?” You spoke going to get your boss Sunghoon.

He was in the back on the computer ordering things the shop needed. “Sunghoon sir, the machine is glitching, do you think you could fix it please ?” He looked up at you lifting a brow, “What ? Why would the machine be down.” He spoke getting up and attending to the problem.

“Good morning!” He spoke to the customers before going to help you with the issue you had. “Ahh, I see the problem, Y/n you forgot to clear the amount on the cash register it’s glitching.” He spoke. “Just move to this one and I’ll redo your order okay? And we’ll make that cake pop free, since you had to wait on something we did wrong.” He spoke giving the child a smile. You pressed your lips together in frustration cleaning the cash register, and fixing the glitch.

You went and made their order swiftly and called it. “I’m so sorry for the wait!” You spoke giving them a smile. “No problem.” She gave a reassuring smile and left. Today was a pretty calm and slow day. It was break time, and so you decided to try and make yourself latte, since that’s one of the harder drinks for you. Sunghoon noticed and came over to help you. “I’ve noticed how hard it is for you to make lattes, can I give you some pointers?” He asked you, you nodded, since it was best to learn from your boss.

“Give my your hand, I’ll show you.” He spoke, it was 20 minutes before he had enough of watching you struggle realizing just telling you how wasn’t gonna work. He placed his chest firmly behind you, his calm scent engulfing you, “Watch and listen for me okay ?” He asked looking at you. You nodded shyly as he grabbed your hand and told you how to do things in such a calm tone. “Look at you, you’re doing so much better already y/n.” He spoke, the tone doing something to you. You tried to keep calm but the fact that he was so close made you week in the knees just thinking about it. “Okay, we’re finished.” He moved from behind you, the cool air of the coffee shop hitting you, making you kinda sad he moved. “Now with my help that way you did really well.” He spoke, you smiled about to speak before you heard the door open. “I’ll take these orders.” He spoke standing at the register.

— Closing shift has finally came, it was just you and him there, getting ready to close. You were counting the registers, making sure everything was all good whilst sunghoon mopped the floors and put the chairs up. To let the floor dry.

“So, how was your 2nd year in collage ?” He asked you breaking the silence. “Uhm, it stressful. I’m supposed to not have a roommate this year so I’m excited for the most part.” You spoke. “That’s good, I always wanted to go to collage.” He spoke, I looked up at him. “You’ve never went ?” You asked, and he nodded. “After high school, I started taking care of my friend coffee shop when she got sick, so there was no time for collage for me.” He spoke. You looked up at him, putting your hands down that were full of money onto the counter looking at him. “So.. if you don’t mind me-“ he cut me off quickly and in a calm dry tone spoke. “She passed last year.” His lips were pressed together as he mopped, the dimly litted coffee shop beaming on his face. The room felt a bit sadder now then before I asked. “Oh .. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have..” you spoke feeling extremely sorry for his lost. He stopped mopping putting the mop back in the bucket. “No.. no it’s fine, you can go home early if you like okay?” He spoke giving you a small smile. “You sure .. I mean the back is still a little messy, I don’t mind staying a little-“ he quickly shook his head. “Trust me it’s fine, I can handle it myself. Enjoy your off day tomorrow. I’ll have some new people working soon so please enjoy your day off.” He spoke, you sighed biting you lip finishing counting the money in the register, going back into the break room and changing out of the apron.

You got into you car driving off into the dark night, feeling bad about asking about his friend no knowing she was dead .. or sick enough to die.

Walking into your current living situation with your friend in their spare bedroom in your hometown till you moved back into your dorms. You went to bed tired from the day.

— As your off day went by it felt off, thinking about how close you and your boss where that day. The way he held your hands to guide you stirred something into you. You couldn’t deny how good looking he was, he was always so calm and understanding even when there were quite rude costumers. He had such a charming smile to you, and customers could definitely agree. Teenage girls making their rounds to the coffee shop during early mornings just to hope that he’d be able to make their coffee or give them their breakfast sandwiches.

You couldn’t deny how funny it was either, the way their expressions changed when they saw that he wasn’t there at that moment made you laugh. Snickering every time a disappointed look grew on their face when you popped up from the back to take their orders which was most of the time, you couldn’t deny those things made you day a little bit better.

There were even times where older women hit on him as he took their order, but somehow they always end up surprised that he’s just 26 it never to make you snicker once more.

You spent the majority of your off day sleeping in, and hanging with your friend on her off day too. Having casual conversations but random thoughts about your boss invaded your brain. Wondering how he made himself look so nice and presentable even when he spilt something. Or how soft his hands felt as he helped you with learning how to make lattes, it and much more thoughts .. but before you knew it. It was time to get ready to go to work the next day.

— The sight of new recruits didn’t fail to surprise you. “Oh I totally forgot we were getting recruits.” You spoke walking into the break room. “Yeah, and I need to ask you something too.” He spoke walking over to you giving you two enough space, for it to not be too close. Especially after the other day .. even though you wouldn’t mind it happening again, you softly hummed to him having a question, crossing your arms and resting your back on the entry way of the door. He moved a little he closer not too though, his hands in his apron pockets before speaking. “Can you help train the second trainee, he’s coming later today and I have something really important later.” He spoke, you looked at him your eyes big and dough like .. it was unintentional, but somehow stirred something in Sunghoon. “I’ll make it up to you later okay ? I’ll help you clean up during the closing shift so don’t worry.” He spoke at you in a way that made you feel some way, yes you found him extremely attractive but could this mean something more ? You shook your head yes kind of eager to find out what he would do to make it up later.

“Thank you, I’m sorry this came so sudden but trust me .. I will make this up to you okay?” He spoke moving a bit closer looking you deeply in your eyes making a promise. “Okay.” You spoke looking at him, watching him as he swiftly leaves to the front to help with the first new worker of the day.

You watched as he left, soon after he left the new recruit came as the other left as well. You help the new recruit with things teaching them how to make simple things and the basic training stuff that you learned. Soon the sun had set and as the coffee shop began to get read to close you got a text from Sunghoon. Your phone vibrating in your pocket.

“Send them home early, I’ll help you clean up.” He texted me, you liked the message shortly after telling the recruit to head home early. Watching them leave made you very anxious in a way, especially when you saw a car pull up in front of the door to see Sunghoon getting out. The door opened and closes soon after him locking in since it was well over closing. “Sorry traffic was busy.” He spoke, walking behind the counter stopping just in front of you. “Mm, how was the new recruit?” He asked, you looked at him still a bit nervous. “They were fine, was a fast learner so it wasn’t too stressful.” You spoke, “I already counted all the cash registers so we can just spend most of the closing time mopping and taking care of the back.” You said walking away from him to the back.

He followed for some reason wanting to talk more then usual. “Listen Y/n thank you for the help really.” He spoke, you turned around looking at him, his nice eyes looking at you, a small smile showed from you. “No problem, it’s the most I could do.” You spoke. He sighed glancing at the door leading to the front of the coffee shop before going in for a soft kiss, it was gentle yet passionate, your hands slowly grabbing his face as you kissed back. He pulled back looking down at you, noticing how cute you looked with your sudden surprised looked. Your look didn’t last long, grabbing his face pulling him in for more. His hands moved to your waist but not for long, he soon moved higher almost too your breast as it became deeper, but self control took over for him pulling back from the kiss, nothing but swollen lips and a string of saliva is left.

“I- I’m sorry .. I don’t want to do things like this, let me take you to dinner or something okay ?” You looked at him, your eyebrows scrunched. “Dinner ?” You repeated, hearing a soft hun from him, his eyes on you. “Mhm, we can clean up quickly and..” His sentence ended sooner then expected by another kiss by you. “I don’t think I can wait till after dinner.” You spoke after kissing him, taking his hand and following him to the break room. The change is demeanor definitely shocked sunghoon, you couldn’t deny you were surprised by yourself too.

— Your hands sat on the table as he kissed you deeply. You were sitting on one of the tables in the break room, legs parted due to Sunghoon taking up the space with his body. His hands shifted from the side of your to gently rubbing the inside of your thigh, inching his way closer to your clothes core. Gently rubbing it before quickly unbuttoning your pants. Finally breaking the longing kiss, breath heavy and lips swollen. “Can I ?” He asked looking at you with the purest eyes. You nodded as you tried to catch your breath.

He smirks attractively as he goes in kissing your neck softly, as his hand slid into your jeans rubbing your folds with his cold hands, you tilted your head back softly moaning until his hands moved causing you to softly whine unintentionally. You lifted your head as you looked down to see him pull down your pants and underwear leaving them on your ankles.

The sudden shift of positions surprised you, his slight manhandling of you, mad your arousal more prominent. You were now bent over the table him right behind you. He rubbed your core slowly with his tip causing you to gasp, the feeling of him slowly pushing into you made you want to cry from the pain. Missionary would’ve been the best position at this moment in time but the way he pestered you with soft kisses on you neck and cheek made you hold your pain back and finally he was in. “Are you okay ..?” He ask softly, you nodded giving him the green light to thrust.

The paste quickens at the same time as his hands squeezing your waist causing you to let out pornographic moans. Your pants surprisingly slipped off your ankles and foot causing sunghoon to noticing giving him the opportunity to make the pleasure so much better and his change to go deeper in you. He grabbed your thigh, roughly thrusting into you making his once quiet groans louder and the squelching noises sound more messy as his paste quickens again. “Fuck! Fuck .. you’re clenching like a fucking virgin.” He spoke, the first time you’ve ever heard him curse, you wanted to say something but but nothing came out but moans and pleads to slow down. “Wait- fuck .. slow down s-sung.. hoon.”

“Mm why? You were practically begging to be fucked, ditching my dinner dates to take my dick.” He spoke in a raspy tone, the change in act made you clench harder. “You’re so- so big..” you whined out causing sunghoon to smirk. “Can’t take my dick can you ? Wipe those pretty little tears and take it okay ?” Your vision became blurry as you felt him bully into you, you felt like you were seeing stars and the room was spinning and it felt like it all came to fast, you cried as you tiredly tried to get him to slow down.

Your hand hitting his abdomen, “I’m gonna cum- fuck!” His hand snaked around your waist as he rubbed your clit causing you to squint tightly as you came messily on him. You rode out your high feeling him get sloppy with his thrust soon pulling out, turning you over pulling you back on the table as he thrust back into you again. The fucked out look prominent as he kissed you one last time before quickly pulling out onto your stomach. You rested on your elbows as you tiredly tried to catch your breath, him leaving to grab a random clean towel cleaning you off.

“Let me take you to dinner, especially after all of this.” Dinner still on your mind. “What about cleaning the-“ “let’s worry about it tomorrow.”

[copperbadge]

[ID: An image of goldfish crackers in a tupperware container on my kitchen counter. They are shot very close-up and covered in delicious seasoning.]

I finished the last of my Old Bay goldfish last week, so I tried the bootleg recipe and it's pretty good! Plus the flavoring is a little looser so when I put a bunch of goldfish and cashews in a bag and shake them up together the nuts get some Old Bay too.

The recipe is on a site RIDDLED with ads so:

Old Bay Goldfish

1 bag (6.6oz) Original Goldfish (not the cheddar -- look for the blue bag. Or don't, I'm not the boss of you.)

5 Tbsp (70g) unsalted butter

1.5 Tbsp Old Bay seasoning

The recipe also called for 1/8 Tsp "Accent" (MSG) but I didn't happen to have any and it was fine without it.

Heat oven to 250F. Pour crackers into a large bowl; melt butter in a normal bowl and stir Old Bay seasoning into the butter. Pour flavoring mixture over goldfish and stir to coat; be ginger but thorough (stir gently but a lot).

Spread crackers on a baking sheet -- I actually used a cake pan to minimize spillage -- and bake, stirring every 10 minutes, for 20-40 minutes, until crackers are "dry". Mine took 25 minutes.

Let cool and store in airtight container.

[sgiandubh]

For a very quick, but effective fix: Pasha's improv rustic pizza

Meet Pasha IV, Shipper Mom's British Shorthair spirit animal and soulmate:

This is the most lazy & gourmet being ever to grace this planet, so it's only normal to dedicate the following quick fix recipe to him (pets are never 'it' in this house, nor should they ever be - damn grammar!).

This is a freestyle recipe I invented for myself back in my first days of desperate cooking apprenticeship, in Paris. Leaving home at 18, with virtually zero food skills, I quickly realized it was not reasonable to eat every single day in town. My path to cooking began with books, fantasizing scrumptious recipes and a lengthy, persevering trial and error process. I always was a difficult, horrendously fastidious client, but now I was slowly turning into a monster, keeping my eyes peeled on cooking gestures and mannerisms, wherever I could find them.

This pizza experiment was an instant success and the moment the coin dropped: I actually could do things to and with food, that would be something more than survival. The rest is reading ahead, combining ahead and never being shy to ask around for that recipe. From taxi drivers to friends, they were all more than happy to generously indulge, all around the world.

You need whatever you have loitering around in your fridge and you aren't really sure how to recycle. I even happily, barbarically put mac & cheese or cold satay noodles (want my recipe? I poached it in Phnom Penh) on it. Tuna/corn/red onion is a sure combo and so are deli bits and bobs/corn/Vidalia onion. Cold roast beef, too. Diced ham, onion and even roasted potatoes leftovers, plus heavy cream - only in winter. Sardines (tinned), lemon/orange zest, ground pepper and perhaps a dash of coriander leaves (add herbs at the end, otherwise, they will go bitter). Fresh goat cheese, pistachio, figs (even fig jam will do) and balsamic vinegar. Sky is the limit. I also never use Mozzarella, and yes, please curse me - I always use Irish red cheddar, because this is what you are likely to find in my fridge until the end of time. And whenever you can or see fit, break an egg on top of it three to five minutes before you take it off the oven: it's called Pizza Radio and it is a local Corsican secret.

Preheat the oven at the usual temperature: 350 Fahrenheit/180 Celsius.

Unroll a store-bought pizza pastry sheet in a parchment paper lined 13x8 baking pan. Let rest while you prepare the easiest sauce in the world.

Mix Heinz ketchup, Sriracha and sweet Thai chili sauce. Should yield about a cup - proportions vary according to your own resistance to heat: one of the reasons you should taste your own concoctions and do it often. If you went overboard with the sacred Sriracha, immediately add honey or some brown sugar, until rectified. Add two Tablespoons (30 ml) of EVOO and mix well. Spread on the pizza pastry sheet with your usual brush.

I always try to use this one, but any brand will do:

4. Add the grated Cheddar, with spiral, clockwise movements (this is something I stole from a pizzaiolo in Florence, it is the only way to make sure all the surface gets evenly covered).

5. Thinly cut the onions (you know: halve them, then go ahead exactly like you would do for onion rings or quarter them and go ahead for more caramelized crunchiness, curse TPTB and cry your arse out). Add them on top. I had red onion - it is stellar with cold cuts.

6. Add whatever it is you want to garnish the pizza with. In my pic, we had thinly cut (recycled) debreceni kolbász (Debreziner) sausages and diced Prague/cooked ham (you need something more neutral to counterbalance all that heat).

7. Finish off with 150 grams/5 ounces (drained) canned sweet corn. No particular brand, but make sure it's dry before you add it on top of this.

8. Bake in a very hot oven for about 20 to 25 minutes. Take out, let breathe (5 minutes tops), cut and devour. I guarantee no leftovers.

You're welcome! We'll get to more serious things this evening, though.

[kitchenscissorbangs]

Magnetic - chapter one

Reincarnated as a roadman in another world?!

"This time, I want you, you, you, you, like it's magnetic"

On a seemingly normal morning, you wake to find your JoJo merch gone and run into a familiar group of weirdos. So now you have to worry about getting them home and not failing your GCSEs. Presented as a series of vignettes detailing your bizarre adventures with your new and old friends.

ao3 (prev) (masterlist) (next)

wc : 1,759

a/n: they aren’t actually roadmen but you get it

Waking up at 6:50 to catch the 7:30 bus is never a good idea. Especially not if you stayed up so late it feels like someone is hitting your head with a hammer. But who really cares? It had been Y/N’s routine since year 8 and it was too late to change. She did consistently arrive 30 minutes early to school so maybe whatever she did worked. School… Some part of her wondered how St Daniella’s school (or STDs as the students referred to it) kept its status as a top 50 private school. Many of the classrooms in the older buildings were being held together with duct tape and the school had gone through six heads in less than a decade. It really was a sinking ship.

With a long sigh, the girl got out of bed. You had already missed the first week of school after spending all summer with her grandparents abroad and you couldn’t miss anymore . Though she mostly hung out alone in the room she shared with her brother… Sure she had friends but she had found out that her phone was the best company.

After going about the rest of her morning as usual and skipping the skincare routine she promised herself she’d do everyday to look like her bias, she threw on your uniform. Her trousers were fraying and she desperately needed a skirt after baking in last year's heat. She shrugged and decided she would worry about that in summer. While the girl was changing, she noticed something odd. The copious amounts of JoJo merch she dedicated her life to collecting had seemingly disappeared overnight. Even stranger, it had all been replaced with a mix of csm and jjk merch. At first, Y/N suspected her mother had finally lost it and threw out all her merch, but then why would it be replaced? The fact bugged her. She must be dreaming.

The fact gnawed at her thoughts as she made her way to the station, with the sound of kpop blaring in her ears. It wasn't until a voice interrupted her thoughts that she snapped back to reality.

“‘Scuse me lady but ummm, d’ya where we’re meant to be going” spoke a boy with strawberry blond hair which ,by the looks of it, he spent a lot longer styling then the now very ticked off teenage girl. He had a thick southern accent and was wearing the same ugly green uniform as the girl.

The girl pulled down her headphones. “To school..” Y/N replied with boredom lacing her voice. Like most people, she was not interested in entertaining some clueless American at 7:25 am.

“Yeah but where is tha-” he was cut off by another boy pushing him aside. Boy 2 was taller than boy 1 by about an inch. He also had blond hair but a golden shade. Boy 2 was also wearing the same school uniform.

“I’ll take care of this, you idiot . Miss it’s our first day of school and noticed that we’re the same uniform as you so we thought that you could help us?” Boy 2 had a smooth accent not too dissimilar to Y/N’s.

“Use google maps or something I dunno,” Y/N replied growing even more agitated. Both boys shared a confused look. As they stared at Y/N in joint perplexity, she noticed that both boys shared an eye colour reminiscent of the lanky man with white hair who stood on her windowsill instead of her precious Giorno figure.

“Santa Maria, both of you are helpless. That’s not how you talk to pretty girl.” You guessed it, another even taller blond boy said to the two boys. He turned the teenager, who was currently debating how an anime character look alike could find her pretty. “Hey bella, wanna see something cool?”

“Go ahead. As long as it's not your penis though,” Y/N said. Boy 3 gave her an amused look and then dug around in the deep pockets of his Superdry coat for something. ‘So he’s gonna show me a dumb vape trick’ Y/N mused to herself. Nothing could have prepared her for what boy 3 did next.

He had pulled out a green steel ball not unlike the weapon of a certain Italian jockey. Boy 3 spun on his finger then threw it at the hedge near the bus stop. The ball trimmed off most of the branches before returning to him. The other six people at the stop didn’t even seem to notice. Y/N however seemed to have her whole reality flipped on it's head.

Y/N gave him a slow clap with a false sense of composure. She was either dreaming or had finally lost it. Her post-pandemic JoJo phase had driven her crazy. She was hallucinating anime characters or seeing them in her dreams. It was hard to decide which one was worse.

“That’s great Gyro Zeppeli. Now can I wait for my bus in peace?” Y/N responded sarcastically. The three boys’ jaws fell slack.

“How’d’ya know his name lady? Who the fuck are ya? You’re not working with Valentine are ya?” boy 1 lunged forward and grabbed the girl’s shoulders with enough intensity to confirm whatever was going was real and leave a nasty mark. He seemed the most distressed out of the group. Recalling the manga she had spent many a night reading and re-reading, the group did look strangely familiar.

“Hold on a second. You’re Johnny Joestar,” Y/N turned to boy 2. “And that’s Diego Brando. What the fuck is going on?” They both nodded as the girl said their names.

“We don’t know either. We were chatting at one of the checkpoints and then there was a loud bang. Next thing I know I’m in some futuristic city and I’m 5 years younger and Joestar can walk again and I’m wearing a hideous green uniform” Diego concluded with a frustrated scoff. He had turned his gaze away from the girl and now started down at his uniform with a look of disdain. Y/N couldn’t help but relate.

“At least the blazer’s not mandatory,” the h/c girl sighed.

Gyro gasped. “Wait a moment. HP was there too. Where is he?”

The trio of disorientated jockeys started murmuring among themselves while occasionally glancing back at the teenage girl. She was just happy that they left her alone. She glanced up at the bus times. Still another 4 minutes. ‘How the fuck did this happen?’ the girl thought to herself. Y/N's mind immediately jumped to the cast of SBR. Maybe it was the surreal feeling from seeing the Gyro use the spin with such precision or the way Johnny introduced himself, but it felt like she was living out a scene from her post-pandemic JoJo phase. She half expected Valentine to crawl out a bush or find a corpse part in her bag.

“That fat slag! I’m gonna kill the bitch the second I see her!” Y/N jumped. The yelling of a fellow teenage girl yanked her out her thoughts. Those words sound like they were being screamed down her ears. Y/N whipped her head around. No-one new had come by. Though there was another teenager across the road yelling into her phone… Y/N couldn’t have heard that… She shook her head.

A shiver ran down the girls back as though something had touched her. There had to be something there. "I didn't get the job. I don't know if I can keep going like this." Another voice spoke. This time a man. Something had to be going on.

“Are you OK, miss?” Johnny asked the girl with a flash of concern in his eyes. As he rest a gentle hand on Y/N's shoulder, she realised that e wasn’t that much taller than her.

“Y/N. That’s my name. Y/N L/N”

“Pleased ta meetcha.” He stuck his hand out. “Name’s Johnny Joestar. But ya already knew that…” He added with an awkward chuckle. For some reason, Y/N found this kind of… cute.

“Oh umm… The bus is nearly here. D’ya have a zip card?”

“A what?”

“One of these.” The three boys looked at Y/N while she dug around for her wallet. She then gestured to the green photo card. The boys did the same before wordlessly getting on the bus with the girl and copying whatever she did.

The group sat in the four seats in the back facing each other.

She found herself caught in the middle of an unexpected and bizarre situation, surrounded by the boys who were bickering and bantering. While they seemed to occupy themselves in their own company, Y/N found time to text Louis some of the situation.

Pookie

You: Pookie guess what?

Pookie: what..?

You: I’m surrounded by teenage boys on the bus

Pookie: are they gorgjoes

You: *gorgeous And yes, they don’t smell like toes—

Pookie: That’s what matters most, right?

Pookie: I love toes

read 07:39

“Flattered you think that Y/N but what is that? And who’s that?” Diego pointed to your phone and the photocard.

“It’s a phone. You use it to call and send text messages. The guy is Yeonjun. He’s a singer ”

“Cara, what’s that around your neck?”

“These are headphones. You can listen to stuff on them” Y/N unpaused the song and gave the headphones to Gyro.

“What kind of witchcraft is this?”

“Bluetooth”

“Gyro, give me a turn!”

“Just wait Johnny, Jesus.”

“It’s not that deep, just give it to him."

“Fine. But only ‘cause a pretty girl asked me to.”

“Idiots.”

“So you don’t want a turn Dio?”

“Not what I said Joestar.”

The boys quickly began squabbling among themselves while the girl laughed. Y/N snapped a photo of the boys for Louis.

Pookie

You: >delivered

Omg

sent 7:43am

“Can I have my headphones back?”

“Oh yeah, of course.” Diego took them off and handed them back to the girl. "So about before. How'd you know our names?"

Y/N sighed. She hoping this conversation wouldn't happen. The thought of everything being fake would probably give them an existential crisis so it was best to save this for later. "Lucky guess."

He gave the girl a questioning look. Fortunately for her, the boys had found their own phones and somehow knew the passwords. She didn't really question it as she put back on her headphones and let herself be drowned in the music.

a/n : i think i made the song reference for the readers stand too obvious. the fic was originally meant to be called who really cares but that didn’t match the vibe and the photocard was meant to be felix but his toes deterred me from that idea

taglist: @lv11sawrr open if you’re interested

[captainbuzzard]

can i please have that better brownie recipe? i've been wanting to bake brownies but i have no quality-assured recipe

My favorite basic brownie recipe to make is a variation on the recipe Mary Encinger's Brownies, which makes a brownie that is somewhere between cakey and gooey. It looks like you can find it online by searching the name and it shows up on NYT, but I was introduced to it through an old cutout from my mom's recipe book. I always make a few changes to the recipe, so I'll put my most commonly used version of it here.

1.5 cups sugar

1 cup unsweetened cocoa powder

1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, melted

4 eggs

1.5 cups flour

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup semisweet chocolate chips (optional. you can also add/substitute this for the original recipe's 0.5 cups chopped walnuts, or skip both altogether if you don't like the textures)

cayenne, to taste (optional. i like it, but if you're going for a classic brownie then it's not necessary)

INSTRUCTIONS:

Preheat oven to 375°F. Grease and flour a 9-by-13 inch baking pan.

In a large bowl, combine the sugar, cocoa powder, and melted butter. Stir until uniform.

Add eggs, one at a time, stirring only until blended.

Add the flour, vanilla, and chocolate, and stir until all the ingredients are just blended.

Transfer mixture to the pan, and shake to even it out.

Bake. The recipe says 20 to 25 minutes but in my experience it's best to start checking earlier (about 15 minutes in) and then stay near the oven to check periodically until it's your desired level of bake. It's key to take them out at the right time. In general, the edges should be just starting to pull away from the edge of the pan, while the middle should still be shiny.

Serve in the pan, or cut into squares for storage. Enjoy!

Extra baking tips:

Personal preference for firmness comes into play, as you can judge when to take them out by how close to the edge the shininess goes. I personally like them on the less baked side, where when you take them out of the oven, you have to wait a couple hours for them to set, but a few more minutes will produce a brownie that's firm enough to eat soon after removing from the oven.

If you're worried that you've overbaked them, it's not the end of the world if you act while they're still very warm. Wet a clean dish towel or cloth napkin (or really, any piece of cloth big enough to cover the whole pan) and wring it out so it doesn't drip. Cover the brownie pan with the damp cloth (carefully! don't do it while it's hot enough to burn you!), wrapping so it's taut enough that the middle doesn't touch the brownies. It may start steaming, which is normal as it's just water evaporating from the cloth. You can take it off whenever you want, but by the time the brownies have gotten near room temperature, it's served its purpose in keeping them from getting dry as they cool.

[kwitras-kitchen]

American Mac ‘n’ Cheese with Hot Chicken Tenders

If American know one thing, it’s creating crazy delicious comfort meals. Follow me and learn how to make this bowl that will make you smile just thinking about it💭🧀

INGREDIENTS

For the Mac 'n' Cheese:

2 cups elbow macaroni

2 cups shredded cheddar cheese

1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese

3 cups milk

4 tablespoons butter

1/4 cup all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon black pepper

1/4 teaspoon paprika 

1/4 teaspoon garlic powder 

1 cup breadcrumbs

1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese

For the Green Beans:

1 pound fresh green beans, trimmed

2 tablespoons olive oil

Salt and pepper, to taste

For the Fried Chicken:

4 chicken breasts or thighs

1 cup buttermilk/ normal milk

1 cup all-purpose flour

1 tablespoon paprika

1 tablespoon garlic powder

1 teaspoon onion powder

1 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon black pepper

Vegetable oil, for frying

Hot sauce, to taste

LET’S START COOKING

1. Prepare the Mac 'n' Cheese:

Cook the Macaroni: Boil the elbow macaroni according to the package instructions until al dente. Drain and set aside.

Make the Cheese Sauce: In a large saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat. Stir in the flour and cook for about 1 minute, until lightly golden.

Add Milk: Gradually whisk in the milk, and continue to cook, stirring constantly, until the sauce thickens (about 5 minutes).

Add Cheese: Remove the saucepan from heat and stir in the cheddar cheese and mozzarella until fully melted and smooth. Season with salt, black pepper, paprika, and garlic powder.

Combine: Add the cooked macaroni to the cheese sauce, stirring until well coated.

Bake: Preheat your oven to 375°F (190°C). Transfer the mac 'n' cheese to a baking dish. In a small bowl, mix the breadcrumbs with the Parmesan cheese. Sprinkle this mixture evenly over the mac 'n' cheese.

Crispy Topping: Bake for 20-25 minutes, or until the top is golden brown and crispy.

2. Prepare the Green Beans:

Cook the Green Beans: Boil the green beans in boiling water for about 3-4 minutes until tender-crisp.

Sauté: In a skillet, heat the olive oil over medium heat. Add the green beans and sauté for 3-4 minutes until heated through and slightly crispy. Season with salt, pepper, and some chii

3. Prepare the Fried Chicken:

Marinate Chicken: Place the chicken in a bowl and cover with buttermilk. Marinate for at least 1 hour or overnight in the refrigerator.

Prepare Coating: In a separate bowl, combine the flour, paprika, garlic powder, onion powder, salt, and pepper.

Coat Chicken: Remove chicken from the buttermilk and dredge in the seasoned flour mixture, pressing lightly to adhere.

Fry Chicken: Heat vegetable oil in a large skillet or deep fryer to 350°F (175°C). Fry the chicken pieces in batches for about 6-8 minutes per side, or until golden brown and cooked through. Drain on paper towels.

Serve with Hot Sauce: Drizzle or serve hot sauce on the fried chicken as desired.

Plate a serving of mac 'n' cheese with green beans on the side, and 1-2  pieces of fried chicken. Add extra hot sauce on the side for those who like it spicy. 😊

Enjoy this classic American comfort meal with a crispy twist and a touch of spice!

If youd’ like to see more of my recipes, don’t hesitate to follow my TikTok where I share my recipes <3

[spiderton]

how to cook a (normal) patapon, a guide

you ever find a suspicious sprout in your yard? or hell, even caught some strange eyeball creatures? congrats, you found one of natures strangest invasive pests thats actually flavorable to eat!

although many are confused about what to do with Patapons (Patapokon D.), one of the recommended ways is to actually cook them! its rather easy, once you know whats tasty and whats not!

(SMALL NOTE) this guide is only for those of Patapokon Donnatapon, or simply referred to as "normal pons" or "plain pons". other patapon subspecies have other range of defenses that you can discover in other blogposts! for normal patapons, unlike other subspecies, they dont have any toxins. the only way they can fight back is with small bites; they wont do any critical damage! itd simply just heal away in a day or so.

STEP ONE

the most important thing to do first is to sadly put them out of their misery. unlike other animals, a simple hit to their bodies with a large item (such as a hammer or butcher knife) will make them explode. the recommended way to do this, without causing a mess, is putting them in the freezer for roughly 15 hours. this results in the patapons dying a peaceful death, and their bodies being frozen enough to mess around.

after you are done, check the pons bodies for any mites or flith. once succeeded, proceed to step two.

STEP TWO

get out a knife (butterknife or a smaller, normal kitchen knife will do) and a cutting board. once the pon is on the cutting board, start cutting around the eyeball and cut the roots connecting the eyeball to the body. pull out the eye and put it in a bowl, repeat this if you have plenty of patapons. put the eyes back in the fridge for 15 hours.

with the eyes gone, next cut off the limbs and push them aside. after youre done with that, put the pons bodies within a mortar bowl (if you dont have one, either a plastic one or the same cutting board will do), and begin to smash the bodies together with either a pestel or gloved hands.

continue to crush them until you feel the body become something close to batter, and then pour in another bowl and keep inside a fridge for 15 hours or less.

STEP THREE

after waiting, take out the eyes and smushed up bodies out of the fridge. take out a cutting board and take the eyes, and start cutting them into four slices like an apple. after that, put the eye slices on a baking pan and bake for 420 degrees and 25 minutes.

once done, take out the eyes and set them to cool. when the mushed pons are a bit warm, you are free to put in butter, flour, sugar, two eggs, and a spoonfull of water. mix them up until you get a then creamy substance.

when the eye slices are cooled down, place on a plate. if you have a piping bag, you can insert the creamy mushedup pons inside and place it in the middle of the plate. adding salt or parmesan is optional.

and ta-daaa! you have your meal! itd taste strangely fruity, but i guess thats the appeal of it! just dont tell your friends those slices are eyeballs.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #282

Today started out normally. But it ended kind of weird.

J made a bunch of rice not too long ago. Like… a bunch of rice. And on the day we went to the reptile and arthropod expo, we also went to the local food co-op on the way home, because J was hungry. Not being one to pass up opportunities, I decided to snag some natto while I was there. But there were three different kinds, and I couldn't choose, and so in my typical style, I decided "fuck it" and got all three…

...Here's what the contents look like:

...Hey, Sephiroth? Do you like natto? I've heard that it's a very polarizing food; in my part of the world, people usually either really hate it or love it a lot, with very little in between, or so I've heard. I wonder what you think...

Normally, in my part of the world, one gets natto by going to the frozen foods section of the Asian grocery store, if there is one. I live in a place that's pretty diverse (and it's AWESOME), so we have Asian grocery stores, Middle Eastern grocery stores, and Hispanic grocery stores, too. We might have more, but... maybe I didn't find them yet. My city isn't as diversified as New York City, but it's still pretty good. Pretty good...

Well anyway. I don't really like the frozen natto by itself; it's really good mixed with rice, for sure!! But this stuff that comes in these jars... I could just eat it with a spoon. I wonder if it has to do with the fact that it hasn't been frozen first. I wouldn't know. Maybe someday, I should go to Japan and see what natto is like over there; I imagine it's oodles better than whatever we have over where I live!

Anyway, we had a bunch of rice, and we had bacon, because I got some from the local convenience store chain on my way home from therapy on Tuesday; M had left the car in a state with low tire pressure and low gas, so I figured the thing to do was to take care of it before coming home, and the convenience store chain called Stewart's (unique to my region!) has gasoline and free air, and also snacks.

So... after doing the whole "responsible adult thing", I decided I get to have snacks. And I went inside the Stewart's, but nothing appealed to me, so I just got a Birthday Cake Shake for M and a chocolate milkshake for J; Stewart's sells these in bottles, and they're really good! And then I saw the bacon, and since we already had rice, eggs, and natto, I decided to get it! And today, I had enough time and energy to prepare it! So that's what I did!

I like to bake bacon in the oven; it's super convenient that way, and you don't get grease splattering everywhere, and it's easy to get it to cook evenly that way. It's just a matter of arranging it on a baking sheet with some parchment paper...

...You stick it in an oven at 400 degrees F (or 204.4 degrees C) for about 25 minutes, depending on how crispy you like it.

Here's how it turned out!

...And if you're wondering what I did with all that rendered fat? Of course, I put it in a jar!

...I used some of it to cook eggs with nice, runny yolks::

...I also used some to fry up some leftover rice, with all three of the different kinds of natto mixed in:

...The result was an epic bowl of deliciousness! Want some...?

...I spent most of the rest of the day playing Dead Cells. I managed to defeat The Hand of the King in the training room with only 4 Brutality, 4 Tactics, and 22 Survival, for 8 points less than the recommended total; my damage multiplier was less than half of what it should have been, while using a play style that is not well-suited for him, and I smashed him up anyways. If I reach him in one of my next runs, he's gonna be in BIG trouble, lemme tell ya!!

I also made chicken leg quarters today - y'know, the same recipe that I've shown you at least twice before. It's a classic for a reason, haha! I was able to serve it up with some leftover broccoli and carrots that J cooked up the other day, as well as the mashed pumpkin I made yesterday. It was good stuff!!! But I didn't think to take any pictures for you; I'm sorry about that.

And here's where it gets weird.

So... M, and J, and I were supposed to go see that Wild Robot movie today, at 7:10. But when we got to the door of the building, there was a pigeon chilling out there, on the ground. It's weird to see pigeons on the ground this late at night. And it wasn't very mobile; it looked kinda haggard, and it seemed sluggish.

...Well. If you've been reading my letters up until this point, you already know where this is going. You already know that I couldn't just leave it there like that. So I didn't. Needless to say, we ended up not seeing the movie in favor of prioritizing the safety of the pigeon.

The nearby animal hospital is closed this late at night, though. We decided to put it in the upstairs bathroom so that it can have space to move, without any risk of our cats getting to it. We put it in the bathtub with a towel for some soft bedding; we expect that it'll poop, and a towel and a bathtub are easy to clean:

...I think it has some kind of respiratory illness. When I tried to reach out to pet it, it made a weird squeaking wheeze; that's not a normal sound for a pigeon.

We're going to bring it to the nearby animal hospital first thing in the morning; they open at 7:30am. They treat wild creatures. Pigeons are technically not wild; they are feral. They used to be human companions before they were discarded as though they are worthless. Nowadays, despite the fact that they used to be friends to humans, they are treated like filthy, disgusting nuisances; it's not fair. I guess I have a bit of a soft spot for them as a result.

...They deserved so much better than this...

And before you ask - yes, we know better than to give it any food or water; we don't know what's wrong with it, and the last thing we need is to give it things to put into its stomach, only to have it choke on its own vomit or something later. No harm will come to it if it goes to bed without dinner; don't worry.

...I just hope that whatever it's sick with is curable, and that it's not on its last legs. But it being on its last legs seems unlikely; it's still cognizant enough to recognize me as a threat, even if it was too weak to get away. That's probably a good sign. We dimmed the lights in the bathroom and closed the door; it's someplace quiet, safe, and warm. Even if it passes away in the night, it'll still be better than passing away on cold, hard pavement on a chilly autumn evening.

...Incidentally, this will be the third sick pigeon I've pulled off the streets of my city. One of them recovered after being sent to the animal hospital. The other one was sick with some kind of digestive system issue; that one didn't make it even after we sent it to the animal hospital, but at least it didn't have to spend its final moments on the pavement in the cold, snowy December air - back when Decembers in my region used to actually be properly cold.

I'm really glad that M and J don't get upset with me for the fact that I can't do nothing when I see something in trouble. I've had partners in the past who would roll their eyes at me and scold me for caring. The people I was raised by were the sorts of people who would roll their eyes at me and scold me for caring. I can still almost hear them: "It's just a stupid fucking pigeon; you're gonna make us miss a movie for a stupid fucking pigeon?" Or else call me gross for being willing to wrap a "dirty" animal in my cardigan. and try to keep it safe.

...But you know. This sort of thing, besides how great they are at maintaining a comfortable temperature for my body and keeping my pasty white ass safe from the sun, is exactly why I wear them. Like your long coat, it's a utility item. It becomes a backpack, a towel, a pillow, a wrap, and whatever else I can think of in a pinch.

...Anyway, I'm really glad that I'm not around people who will scold me for having basic empathy anymore. We can see the movie tomorrow.

...Well. If we're gonna get to the animal hospital right as it opens, I need to be up early - to the tune of 6:30am. It's already almost 9; I had better get ready for bed. Maybe if I still have a few moments after my CPAP is washed and my teeth are brushed, I'll play a little more Dead Cells.

I'll leave this here just in case:

I love you. So please do stay safe out there, okay? Please come back home to us in one piece. Both your world and my world need you.

I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[ladyofthelands]

this is for @oriandcate because they're amazing

yelds 1 12-inch pizza crust [i normally double it. makes 2 flat 9x13 pizzas, 1 round traditional crusted pizza, and a small mess of bread sticks. enough to feed the three of us 3-4 times] Making it by hand, no stand mixer

1 cup warm water (110 degrees F/45 degrees C) 1 (.25 ounce) package active dry yeast (7 g) 1 teaspoon white sugar 2 ½ cups bread flour (210g cup) 2 tablespoons olive oil 1 teaspoon salt Gather all ingredients. Preheat oven to 450 degrees F (230 degrees C), and lightly grease a pizza pan. flour a kneading surface

Measure out water into a bowl, add sugar, then yeast and let stand untill foamy. about 10 minutes In large mixing bowl combine flour and salt, add oil and yeast water. When mostly combined turn out on the floured a kneading surface. kneed until the skin is tight and the flour is incorporated cut into equal portions and rest on a floured surface for 5-10 minutes Flaten portions with hands and spread on the backs of your hands until roughly the size of the oiled pan. turn over on the pan and stretch until desired shape and thickness. (if it's tough and pulling back into shape let rest for a minute and start on another crust. If you have too much on a sheet pizza pinch off the excess and turn it into bread sticks) cover in sauce and toppings of choice

for breadsticks take small portions of dough and pull into long ropes. twist into knots. spray or brush on oil (olive, avocado, butter) and salt the tops. cooks ~5 min faster than pizzas, depending on how thick you make them

bake in a 450F oven for 20 minutes or untill golden brown.

Can freeze leftovers, or refrigerate and eat within 3 days. We reheat in toaster oven on toast for 7ish minutes. Traditional crust needs to go for a bit more or the sauce at the crust doesn't get warm. i haven't tried in an air fryer

my well-wishes for happy baking and enjoying E>E>E>E>E>E>E>E>

[smalltowngnoll]

Whole Cheesesteak Pizza

Slices of steak and gooey cheese make a great combination!

This pizza features a red bell pepper sauce with additional caramelized peppers and onions on top! Little messy, some extra juice and oil came off the topping. But it was delicious!

Ingredients

Pizza dough (I use NYT’s normally)

2 whole, 1/2 sliced red bell peppers

1/2 green bell pepper sliced

1 onion, sliced and divided into 2 groups

3 medium tomatoes, wedged

3 cloves garlic

1 tsp salt total

1 tsp black pepper total

1/2 tsp oregano

olive oil

3/4 lb steak cut into thin strips. I used a thinly-cut chuck from Safeway. Sirloin is apparently the go-to but was really expensive.

8 oz cheddar, grated

Recipe

Broil the 2 whole red bell peppers, rotating to let the skin char. Let cool once skin is pulling away from the pepper.

Bake 1/2 of the sliced onion and tomato wedges in the oven at 400*F, about 15 or 20 minutes. Keep an eye on it.

Caramelize the green and red bell slices and remaining onion in a skillet with a little oil. Save for topping.

Peel the skin off the cooled red bell pepper and remove the stem.

Puree the roasted bell peppers, tomatoes, onion, garlic, 1/2 tsp salt, 1/2 tsp pepper, and 1 TBS tomato paste.

Season beef strips with 1/2 tsp salt and 1/2 tsp pepper. Cook on low until browned.

Spread the sauce on the pizza dough. Top with cheese, followed by beef, bell pepper slices, and caramelized onion slices.

Bake at 350*F for 20 to 25 minutes. Allow a little cooling before slicing so it’s not too goopy.

Final Product

Not too bad! Not my go-to for a pizza, but it came out better than I expected.

[theatrekidenergy]

Vent!

PLEASE Do NOT read below the cut if you are a sensitive to talks of e*ting problems, we*ght loss and everything in that range. I care about you so much, please take care of yourself, eat something that makes you feel good, get some rest, and love you for you hunny. I’m here if you ever need someone to talk too. 🫶

TW: recovering ana, weight loss, weight mention, venting

This post IS NOT pro-ana, this is a VENT and I am trying to recover, if you are pro-ana or a th*nspo blog I will block and report you if you interact with this post. /srs

I lost weight for so long, I’m 5’3 / 5’4, and at first I was 111lbs, then I went down to 106lbs within like 3 weeks. But I flared up, couldn’t walk for more than 10 steps without collapsing, couldn’t workout or skate, chronic illness fucking hurts. And I gained. I gained so fucking much so, so fast. The medication I was on slowed my metabolism to shit and I’m 112lbs now. I know that weight fluctuations are normal at my age, but FUCK why????? Shit it hurts. Then, I lost a couple more pounds a couple days back, went down to 108 and it flucated io again to 110. My birthday was today and last night was my party the night before and my friend wanted to make a candy salad so I said yes. Of course I said yes. They’re my best friend. But I ate so much. And I weighed myself in the morning. 112. How the actual fuck did I gain that much?

I had to punish myself somehow, but my dad, my god awful dad who’s only nice to me approximately 2 days a year (my birthday and Christmas) decided to take me to lunch at a buffet. I ate so damn much. Noodles and soup and shit. I tried to eat low cal but once again my fucking dumb ass actually did something right for once after having a lunch and breakfast taht put me in the 500’s ended up having a salad for dinner. But my big brother and his fantastic girlfriend (love them both SOSOSO much) did baking, they always do baking, and I always feel guilty and it always makes me binge. Today they made cinnamon rolls as a “happy birthday Adam!” Surprise, I got the smallest one (probably like 180 cal, give or take) and by then I had already fucked uo and got my calories to a 1,180. I only worked out for 25 minutes today, and I’m still at 110.5lbs and I feel just so so disgusting. My neck feels fat. When I don’t press my tongue there isn’t even a little crook (I always slide my finger into that crook before I eat, I’m trying to stop in recovery but it’s so hard to break. I used to use it as a determiner if I could eat, period. But now I’m slipping back into the habit, maybe I’ll stop when I’m thin again. I know it’s not healthy. I don’t know what to do to stop. I’ll talk to a therapist when I get the chance. I think my parents are starting to notice.)

[istherewifiinhell]

Carrot Pineapple Muffins

The recipe for the muffins seen here, well. Sort of anyway.

Recipe as written, on a page from maybe a website or book? I just have a photo copy I reprint as needed (read: as the paper falls victim to mishaps)

1 1/2 cups flour

1 cup sugar

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp baking soda

1 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp salt

2/3 cup salad oil

2 eggs

1 cup finely grated raw carrot

1/2 cup crushed pineapple with juice

1 tsp vanilla

Sift flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon and salt together in large bowl. Add oil, eggs, carrot, pineapple and vanilla.

Blend on low speed until all is moist, then beat for 2 minutes at medium speed. Half fill greased muffin tins and bake at 350 F for 25 minutes.

Makes 24 muffins. -Mrs. W. Atkins Agincourt, Ontario

Well thank u Mrs. Agincourt, the impact uve had on my life is not insubstantial. If you would like these muffins id def reccomend just making them as is...

however... u dont have a recipe in your life this long and Not Fuck With It.

Number One alteration that ive never NOT done (well maybe once by accident?) blend those pineapples. well it very well might be to ppls preference to have little morsels of pineapple in there. but a blended pineapple slurry just makes it like. applesauce muffins. just a nice moist texture throughout idk

Number 1.5 is u can make this a cake if u like. i guess thats obivious. BUT. Its good. i had this for many a birthday. ice that shit, normal buttercream please what is with the cream cheese obsession i dont know. do what u like but dont limit urself to expectation okay. Bakes into a nice really brown cake. U gotta bake this recipe like 'well done' if u want it to have any kind of structural intregrity so its kinda? crusty? i like it tho.

Number 2. ratios. in an impluse that im sure started in some healthy eating for the kids blah blah. but its just how i make it now. I tend to increase the pineapple and decrease the oil and use one egg? how much?? ehhhhhh..... like like a cup of pineapple. and 1/3 oil? does that math out? probably not idk. dont do it like how i do it maybe probably but thats how i do it

ALSO. MORE CINNAMON. Live deliciously. could go up to a tbsp of cinnamon honestly. Maybe even apple pie or chai spices. Could do whatever.

Number 3. definitional quibbles. "makes 24 muffins" whos muffins.... i find this tends to make me about 15 large muffins. maybe 16-18 if u want to be safe from over flow? and more if u want to fill em with a jam thing.

"finely grated carrot" using a grater with wholes less that like... idk half a centremeter gives me a bad time. u want like. chedder cheese size not parmesan.

oh also "salad oil" i use canola or vegatable. is that what it means by that? [makes i dunno noise] you could sub with various melted fats. there would be differences but not a big deal. butter or marg or coconut. whatever.

Number 4. Process. Oh mostly just I mix all the liquids together and then add them to the dry ingredients. (u could pop them all into blender together if u want) im mixing this shit by hand so u know. usuaully i do carrots a dry ingredient but that might not even be a good choice again ignore what im doing.

and again bake time. Ur really gonna want to check on them to to make sure their done. like toothpick check colour check whatever. their moist so its not a big like. over cook problem i think. AND i think theyre really good after sitting in the fridge or freezer and getting reheated (fresh baked goods are soooo tasty but a microwave is also a wonderful invention)

post thought. the jam. i dont usually fill these muffins usually i save that for applesauce ones, but i did last time. i tend to just heat whatever frozen berries, little lemon or lime juice. uhhhh maybe 1/4 cup of sugar? in a small sauce pan. how much fruit. ??? enough. i fill each muffin with like. a tablespoon. so idk. math that one out. needs to be a thick sauce! (however if its TOO thick then u also lose out on messy pick apart muffin treat. ur call) and chilled. if u wanna avoid Big Mess Muffin. lmao. u could swril the jam in or whatever else to but. effort.

[facebook-stabber]

RECIPE‼‼

Easy apple cake thing... I guess... (sorry for the terrible photos)

Ingredients:

240g of self-rising flour

150g of sugar

75ml of oil¹ (I used sunflower)

180ml of milk

1 egg

4 small apples (or 2 normal ones, though you can add more or less depending on how much fruit you want)

Vanilla extract

Lemon zest

Lemon juice

Process:

Mix the flour, sugar, milk, oil and egg together

Add 1 cap of vanilla extract, almost an entire lemon's zest, and lemon juice to taste (I add a considerable amount because I like it a bit more sour, though >10 drops will do!)

Peel and cut up the apples into bite-sized pieces (do NOT add it into the batter!!)

Butter the "mold" (where you'll put the batter in to later pop it into the oven; I'm not sure if that's what it's called in English)

Add some of the batter and let it cover the base of the mold, then add some apple pieces.

Add the rest of the batter and apple pieces by layering them in the order stated in the previous step.

Pre-heat the oven at 180°C (or 350°F aprox.) for around 5 minutes (though it depends on how fast your oven heats up)

Put the mold with the cake in and let it bake for 20 to 25 minutes (same heat) (this also depends on how fast your oven heats up)

¹ You can use 100g of butter if you don't want to use oil

NOTE: I used an electric oven, not one of the gas-powered ones.

If you want to use the gas ones, I suggest you put the heat on medium. Though, I'm not really sure how long you'd have to leave it in if you use one of these ovens...

[masaotheheckindog]

shioyaki is an easy go-to meal for me when I don't feel like cooking because it doesn't require you to stand in front of a stove. Yeah it requires a little prep, but then you just stick it in the oven (unless you're lucky enough to have a fish toaster) and that's it. I usually make takikomi gohan with a meat in it and have it be the main dish, but this time, I just made it with various types of mushrooms and seasonings. One difference this time was that I put a piece of konbu in the rice steamer with it, and it actually made it noticeably tastier. Below are some recipes.

If you want to make shioyaki, I recommend soaking the fish in sake for at least 30 minutes in a container in the refrigerator. Then pat it dry, lay it out on parchment paper, salt both sides, and let it rest for 20 minutes. At this point, if you're using an oven, preheat it to 220C/425F. After 20 minutes, the salt will have drawn more moisture from the fish, so pat it dry once again. At this point, you can put it in the oven on a baking sheet covered in parchment paper. Cook it in the oven for 25 minutes or until desired crispiness is achieved. As for the kinoko gohan, start by soaking dried shiitake and a strip of konbu in water for at least 30 minutes. Saving the water, cut off the stems of the dried shiitake and cut the caps into strips. Cut 3-4 each of fresh oyster and shiitake (or whatever mushrooms you want to use). Put a cup of uncooked rice in the steamer pot with 2 tablespoons each of soy sauce, mirin, and sake. Add the mushroom water and top off with plain water until there's enough liquid in the steamer to cook the rice. Stir to mix. Now place the strip of konbu on top of the rice, then add your mushrooms. Don't stir--these should stay on top of the rice while cooking. If your rice steamer has a 'mixed' setting, use it. Otherwise, just cook as normal. When it's finished cooking, remove the konbu and mix the mushrooms and rice together before serving. You can leave leftovers in the steamer on the warm setting and they'll stay good for a while. If you want to, you can make this a full meal by adding cut up chicken thighs or pieces of fish--I especially recommend salmon or red trout. Both of these dishes go well with miso soup and vegetables .