#automatic delivery

[icewindandboringhorror]

Recent ones of these even though they all look the same lol.. forcing myself to document progress..

[kissycat]

Why does PayPal somehow have every address I've ever used saved in countless typo variations and also the address of my ex and a friend's old address and deadname

[scoups4lyfe]

Sonoza's a G for actually taking her xD

a man of mystery,,,, lmao

eY YOOOOO

just attacks head on (respectable)

w o t

[thesufferqueen]

Cough.

(tags)

[egodari]

hi, i study pharmaceutical sciences. aka how medicines work and why they're made the way they are.

OP is specifically talking about topical testosterone meant for systemic delivery (ie, AndroGel, Fortesta, TestoGel etc.) whatever this person's partner was prescribed is a different formulation (aka the form it comes in, additives and all) to the one that OP was talking about, yeah, more likely a cream or ointment formulation that probably doesn't contain the amount of alcohol that AndroGel etc would. i doubt OP meant to say that there's no way to localise the effects of hormones. obviously that can be done given the existence of many topical creams used to treat things like acne.

the reason OP (and actual medicine instructions) state to not put it on your dick, is because that specific formulation is not designed for localised delivery. the high alcohol content in the gel would damage and dry out the very delicate skin on your tdick.

the alcohol is used to establish the viscosity of the gel and to help dissolve the actual testosterone (and other additives that help with the medicine's function), which allows it to diffuse through your skin membranes and enter your bloodstream, achieving systemic delivery. this then causes all the downstream effects of having testosterone in your system (bottom growth, voice lowering, etc.)

creams and ointments are used for local delivery as they're not designed to try and get the drug into your bloodstream, they're meant to concentrate in a specific area and do whatever it is they're meant to do there. that's how acne creams and ointments work, that's how topical corticosteroids for treating rashes work. the whole point of a cream or ointment is to avoid systemic delivery.

just because two medicines have the same active ingredient, doesn't mean that they're the same medication at all. they aren't always able to be substituted for each other, and they can be used for different things.

I saw a post a little while ago that I'll never find again, but it's still bugging me. It was written like a PSA about proper procedure for applying testosterone gel--mainly, how you're not supposed to let it get on anyone else's skin.

And that's correct. But the post went hard on it, like "please, please be aware of the risks of this medication, it can do so much damage to others if you're not careful, I just think we should be honest about the advantages and disadvantages of medications like this."

It could've been sincere, but it gave me concern-trolling vibes real bad and I can't get it out of my head. So here's my PSA:

Don't slap on your T-gel and then immediately rub your bare bicep on anyone.

Once 2 hours have passed, the remaining amount available to be absorbed is negligible. The med guide says to wash your bicep before you rub it on anyone, but even that's being extremely cautious.

Testosterone isn't poison. If you apply a full dose every day, it still takes months before anything noticeable happens. It's not going to kill someone who accidentally touches your skin for .5 milliseconds.

You do not have to handle T-gel like it's drain cleaner. It's not corrosive. Cis women have testosterone. It's a thing that humans have in our bodies. Avoid getting your medication onto anyone else, but holy shit nothing bad is gonna happen if you forget one time and snuggle shirtless.

T-gel is alcohol-based, so it's best to refrain from being on fire until it has dried thoroughly.

Don't put it on your dick. If you've ever accidentally or on purpose gotten IcyHot on your dick, you have an intuitive understanding of how the skin there differs from bicep skin. Also, the effects of testosterone gel don't localize like that and your dick is fine, I promise.

Don't eat it. I don't know why you'd want to, but don't.

Don't leave the bottle out around little kids on account of little kids being the way that they are, i.e., enthusiastic about potions.

[businessskibat]

New upcoming car :आ गयी Maruti Suzuki Fronx, मिलेगा दमदार इंजन और पावरफुल फीचर्स

आप हमारे देश की सबसे बड़ी चार पहिया कार निर्माता Maruti Suzuki Fronx  के बारे में जानते होंगे। यह भारत में खासकर अपने सुंदर और शक्तिशाली इंजन वाली कारों के लिए जाना जाता है। आजकल लोगों के दिलो पर ऐसी ही एक कार है। Maruti Suzuki Fronx हमारी चर्चा का विषय है। Maruti Suzuki Fronx Maruti Fronx, भारतीय बाजार की आवश्यकताओं को ध्यान में रखते हुए बनाया गया एक सुंदर और आधुनिक कॉम्पैक्ट SUV है। यह कार…

[thehashtag]

The Team Robotics: Driving Efficiency and Innovation with Advanced Robotic Solutions

Introduction 

The Team Robotics is a leading industrial robot manufacturer based in Chennai, India, known for its cutting-edge robotic solutions. We excel in delivering innovative, high-performance technology that enhances productivity and efficiency. Our commitment to in-house development ensures cost-effective, tailored solutions for diverse industries. As a top robotics company in India, we are transforming the future of industrial automation.

 The Team Robotics: Pioneering Industrial Robot Manufacturers in Chennai

The Team Robotics stands at the forefront of industrial automation, emerging as a leading industrial robot manufacturer in Chennai, India. Our company has earned a reputation among the top robotics companies in Chennai and his Ro-WAITER Robots  as one of the best robotics in India. We specialize in creating innovative, cutting-edge robotic solutions that cater to the unique needs of various industries.

 Revolutionizing Industrial Automation with Advanced Robotics

At The Team Robotics, we are dedicated to revolutionizing industrial automation with our advanced  Human Robot Manufacturer technologies. Our smart industrial robots are engineered to enhance productivity, efficiency, and safety in manufacturing processes. By leveraging state-of-the-art technologies, we provide customized robotic solutions that address the specific challenges of different sectors.

 The Growth of Robotics Companies in Chennai

Chennai has become a hotbed for robotics innovation, with numerous companies contributing to its dynamic growth. Among these, The Team Robotics stands out as a trailblazer, consistently ranking among the top 10 robotics companies in India. Our commitment to excellence and relentless pursuit of technological advancement have established us as a preferred choice for businesses seeking top-notch robotic solutions.

 Indigenous Manufacturing: A Core Strength

A core strength of The Team Robotics is Agv Robot Suppliers. By developing all our technologies in-house, we can offer cost-effective solutions without compromising on quality or performance. This approach allows us to stay at the forefront of the industry and provide our clients with reliable, high-quality robotic systems that are tailored to their specific needs.

 Smart Dinner Robots: Enhancing the Dining Experience

One of our innovative products is the smart dinner robot, designed to transform the dining experience in restaurants and hospitality settings. These robots utilize advanced vision systems to navigate and interact with customers, improving service efficiency and overall customer satisfaction. This groundbreaking innovation underscores our position as one of the top robotics companies in Chennai, leading the way in service automation.

 Automated Guided Vehicles (AGVs): Optimizing Material Handling

Our Automated Guided Vehicles (AGVs) are revolutionizing material handling processes in various industries. These next-gen AGVs are equipped with cutting-edge navigation and safety technologies, ensuring seamless integration into existing workflows. As a leading robotics manufacturing company in India, we prioritize reliability and efficiency in all our products, helping businesses optimize their operations.

 Humanoid Robots: The Future of Human-Robot Interaction

Humanoid robots represent the future of human-robot interaction, and The Team Robotics is at the forefront of their development. Our advanced humanoid robots are capable of performing complex tasks, interacting naturally with humans, and adapting to various environments. This revolutionary technology solidifies our standing as one of the best robotics companies in India, pushing the boundaries of what robotics can achieve.

 Vision Solutions: Precision and Accuracy in Industrial Applications

Vision solutions are crucial for precision and accuracy in industrial applications. At The Team Robotics, we have developed advanced vision technologies that enable our robots to perform tasks with exceptional accuracy, reducing errors and enhancing overall efficiency. This expertise places us among the industry-leading robotics companies in India, trusted by clients across various sectors to deliver cutting-edge solutions.

 The Competitive Edge: Innovation, Quality, and Customer Satisfaction

The competitive edge of The Team Robotics lies in our unwavering commitment to innovation, quality, and customer satisfaction. Our in-house development capabilities ensure we stay ahead of industry trends, offering the latest advancements in robotics technology. Our customer-centric approach guarantees that we provide unmatched quality and performance in all our products, making us a trusted partner for businesses seeking reliable robotic solutions.

 Conclusion

The Team Robotics is poised to continue leading the robotics industry with our transformative and future-ready innovations. Our dedication to developing indigenous technologies and providing cost-effective, high-quality solutions ensures we remain at the forefront of industrial automation. For businesses seeking the best in robotics, The Team Robotics is the top choice among robotics companies in Chennai and across India. Our vision is to redefine the landscape of industrial automation, creating smarter, more efficient solutions for a rapidly evolving world.

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[incorrectbatfam]

Bruce looks like the kind of parents who will hear the children say that they like some food and automatically accept it as the children's favorite meal

And the children will just eat it forever now to make Bruce happy

What food/snacks/fruit they accidentally say "oh this taste good actually" and now are they cursed by it?

Waitress: And what would you like as your side?

8-year-old Dick: French fries!

[19 years later]

Bruce: And here's your dinner, side of fries as always.

Dick, who's been eating fries every day since: Yippee.

———————

12-year-old Jason: *looks at a candy bar*

Bruce: You want it?

Jason: I dunno, it's like three dollars.

Bruce: Hey, don't worry about it, chum.

[11 years later]

Jason: *finds the same candy bar in his belt*

Jason: Well, it's the thought that counts.

———————

14-year-old Tim: Since Alfred's not home I ordered pizza for dinner.

Bruce, working: *grunts*

[3 years later]

*doorbell rings*

Tim: Weird, I wasn't expecting anyone.

Tim: *opens the door*

Bruce, in a Bat-pizza uniform: Delivery for Tim Drake.

———————

15-year-old Steph: *makes waffles*

[3 years later]

Steph: Bruce, why'd you buy so much flour?

Bruce: So you can make waffles.

———————

Bruce: You hungry?

Duke: I dunno, I guess I could go for a smoothie or something.

[later]

Duke: What's with the second fridge?

Bruce: To keep your smoothies.

———————

Damian: From now on, I am a vegetarian.

Bruce: Okay, but what about protein?

Damian: There are plenty of options, like tofu.

[later]

Damian, faced with a tofu truck: Perhaps I should have listened to Brown's advice.

———————

Bruce: *driving*

Cass: *points to a pumpkin patch*

Bruce: We'll see.

[later]

Cass: *goes to her room*

Cass: Dad?

Bruce: Yes, princess?

Cass: Pumpkin patch. In my room.

Bruce: I called in a favor from Ivy.

[kossups]

Safeguard Your Electronics with a Robust Battery Backup System

In a digital age where we're dependent on electronic devices for work and leisure, unexpected power disruptions can be a real buzzkill. But fear not! The answer to your power-related worries lies in one powerful solution: the battery backup system. In this article, we'll delve into the world of battery backup systems and highlight why they are a must-have for anyone seeking uninterrupted power.

The Power of Battery Backup Systems: Imagine you're in the middle of an important video call or finalizing an important document when suddenly, darkness envelops your room. Enter the superhero of electronics – the battery backup system. This ingenious device steps in immediately during power outages, ensuring your devices stay online and operational.

Exploring Different Types of Battery Backup Systems: When it comes to safeguarding your electronics, not all battery backup systems are created equal. There are three primary types:

Offline/Standby Systems: Basic yet effective, they're perfect for safeguarding home devices like computers and entertainment systems.

Line-Interactive Systems: A notch up in protection, these systems offer voltage regulation and battery power during outages, ideal for small businesses.

Online/Double-Conversion Systems: The cream of the crop, they provide continuous AC-to-DC conversion, making them indispensable for critical operations like data centers.

Crucial Components of a Battery Backup System: Let's crack open the anatomy of a battery backup system:

Batteries: The powerhouse that stores energy, ready to leap into action when the main power falters.

Inverters: These wizards convert battery-stored DC power into usable AC power for your devices.

Automatic Transfer Switches: The gatekeepers that detect power disruptions and swiftly switch to battery power, ensuring seamless operations.

Advantages Galore with Battery Backup Systems:

Device Defender: Shield your devices from power surges and voltage spikes.

Data Protector: Keep your data safe during sudden outages, whether you're working from home or running a business.

Operational Savior: Crucial processes in businesses like servers and communication systems remain unaffected and uninterrupted.

Life Extender: Ensure the longevity of your electronic gadgets with consistent power supply.

Stress Reliever: Bid adieu to power-related stress as you continue your tasks seamlessly.

Choosing the Right Battery Backup System: The key to a harmonious power backup experience lies in selecting the right system for your needs:

Load Capacity: Calculate the combined power requirements of all connected devices.

Runtime Consideration: Determine how long the battery can sustain your devices during an outage.

Device Compatibility: Match the power needs of your devices with the capabilities of the battery backup system.

Simple Setup and Easy Maintenance: Installing a battery backup system isn't rocket science. Stick to the manufacturer's instructions or consult a pro for complex setups. Regular maintenance includes battery checks and system functionality tests.

Real-Life Stories:

Home Heroics: A homeowner's crucial work project was saved by a battery backup system during an unexpected outage.

Business Triumph: An online store didn't lose a penny in revenue during a blackout because their online operations were backed by a battery backup system.

Medical Marvel: Hospitals rely on these systems to ensure life-saving medical equipment remains operational, even during power failures.

Battery Backup vs. Generators: Making the Choice: While generators offer prolonged power supply, battery backup systems are compact, noise-free, and provide instant power. They're a cost-effective solution for short-duration outages.

Conclusion : When darkness threatens to disrupt your digital world, a dependable battery backup system steps in as your guardian angel. Whether you're safeguarding your home office, ensuring business continuity, or protecting critical systems, investing in a robust battery backup system is a smart move. Empower yourself with uninterrupted power and embrace the future of electronics resilience.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Amazon's bestselling "bitter lemon" energy drink was bottled delivery driver piss

Today (Oct 20), I'm in Charleston, WV at Charleston's Taylor Books from 12h-14h.

For a brief time this year, the bestselling "bitter lemon drink" on Amazon was "Release Energy," which consisted of the harvested urine of Amazon delivery drivers, rebottled for sale by Catfish UK prankster Oobah Butler in a stunt for a new Channel 4 doc, "The Great Amazon Heist":

https://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-great-amazon-heist

Collecting driver piss is surprisingly easy. Amazon, you see, puts its drivers on a quota that makes it impossible for them to drive safely, park conscientiously, or, indeed, fulfill their basic human biological needs. Amazon has long waged war on its employees' kidneys, marking down warehouse workers for "time off task" when they visit the toilets.

As tales of drivers pissing – and shitting! – in their vans multiplied, Amazon took decisive action. The company enacted a strict zero tolerance policy for drivers returning to the depot with bottles of piss in their vans.

That's where Butler comes in: the roads leading to Amazon delivery depots are lined with bottles of piss thrown out of delivery vans by drivers who don't want to lose their jobs, which made harvesting the raw material for "Release Energy" a straightforward matter.

Butler was worried that he wouldn't be able to list his product on Amazon because he didn't have the requisite "food and drinks licensing" certificates, so he listed his drink in Amazon's refillable pump dispenser category. But Amazon's systems detected the mismatch and automatically shifted the product into the drinks section.

Butler enlisted some confederates to place orders for his drink, and it quickly rocketed to the top of Amazon's listings for the category, which led to Amazon's recommendation engine pushing the item on people who weren't in on the gag. When these orders came in, Butler pulled the plug, but not before an Amazon rep telephoned him to pitch him turning packaging, shipping and fulfillment over to Amazon:

https://www.wired.com/story/amazon-let-its-drivers-urine-be-sold-as-an-energy-drink/

The Release Energy prank was just one stunt Butler pulled for his doc; he also went undercover at an Amazon warehouse, during a period when Amazon hired an extra 1,000 workers for its warehouses in Coventry, UK, in a successful bid to dilute pro-union sentiment in his workforce in advance of a key union vote:

https://jacobin.com/2023/10/the-great-amazon-heist-oobah-butler-review

Butler's stint as an Amazon warehouse worker only lasted a couple of days, ending when Amazon recognized him and fired him.

The contrast between Amazon's ability to detect an undercover reporter and its inability to spot bottles of piss being marketed as bitter lemon energy drink says it all, really. Corporations like Amazon hire vast armies of "threat intelligence" creeps who LARP at being CIA superspies, subjecting employees and activists to intense and often illegal surveillance.

But while Amazon's defensive might is laser-focused on the threat of labor organizers and documentarians, the company can't figure out that one of its bestselling products is bottles of its tormented drivers' own urine.

In the USA, the FTC is suing Amazon for its monopolistic tactics, arguing that the company has found ways to raise prices and reduce quality by trapping manufacturers and sellers with its logistics operation, taking $0.45-$0.51 out of every dollar they earn and forcing them to raise prices at all retailers:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/25/greedflation/#commissar-bezos

The Release Energy stunt shows where Amazon's priorities are. Not only did Release Energy get listed on Amazon without any quality checks, the company actually nudged it into a category where it was more likely to be consumed by a person. The only notice the company took of Release Energy was in its logistics and manufacturing department – the part of the business that extracts the monopoly rents at issue in the FTC case – which tracked Butler down in order to sell him these services.

The drivers whose piss Butler collected don't work directly for Amazon, they work for a Delivery Service Partner. These DSPs are victims of a pyramid scheme that Amazon set up. DSP operators lease vans and pay to have them skinned in Amazon livery and studded with Amazon sensors. They take out long-term leases on depots, and hire drivers who dress in Amazon uniforms. Their drivers are minutely monitored by Amazon, down to the movements of their eyeballs.

But none of this is "Amazon" – it's all run by an "entrepreneur," whom Amazon can cut loose without notice, leaving them with unfairly terminated employees, outstanding workers' comp claims, a fleet of Amazon-skinned vehicles and unbreakable facilities leases:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/04/17/revenge-of-the-chickenized-reverse-centaurs/

Speaking to Wired, Amazon denied that it forces its drivers to piss in bottles, but Butler clearly catches a DSP dispatcher telling drivers "If you pee in a bottle and leave it [in the vehicle], you will get a point for that" – that is, the part you get punished for isn't the peeing, it's the leaving.

Amazon's defense against the FTC is that it spares no effort to keep its marketplace safe. As Amazon spokesperson James Drummond says, they use "industry-leading tools to prevent genuinely unsafe products being listed." But the only industry-leading tools in evidence are tools to bust unions and screw suppliers.

In her landmark Yale Law Review paper, "Amazon's Antitrust Paradox," FTC Chair Lina Khan makes a brilliant argument that Amazon's alleged benefits to "consumers" are temporary at best, illusory at worst:

https://www.yalelawjournal.org/note/amazons-antitrust-paradox

In Butler's documentary, Khan's hypothesis is thoroughly validated: here's a company extracting hundreds of billions from merchants who raise prices to compensate, and those monopoly rents are "invested" in union-busting and countermeasures against investigative journalists, while the tools to keep you from accidentally getting a bottle of piss in the mail are laughably primitive.

Truly, Amazon is the apex predator of the platform era:

https://pluralistic.net/ApexPredator

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/20/release-energy/#the-bitterest-lemon

My next novel is The Lost Cause, a hopeful novel of the climate emergency. Amazon won't sell the audiobook, so I made my own and I'm pre-selling it on Kickstarter!

[pucksandpower]

Like … for Uber?

Max Verstappen x Reader

Summary: maybe you should have been a bit more specific when you told your parents that your boyfriend drives for a living

The aroma of roast chicken and freshly baked rolls wafts through the air as you nervously adjust the centerpiece on the dining room table. Your parents and younger brother are due home any minute, and you’ve spent the afternoon preparing for this pivotal family dinner. Tonight, they’ll finally meet your boyfriend.

The doorbell chimes, sending a jolt through your body. You hurry to the entrance, smoothing down your dress before opening the door. Max stands there, a bouquet of flowers in hand and an easy smile on his face.

“Hey,” he says, leaning in to kiss your cheek. “These are for your mother.”

“Thanks, you didn’t have to do that,” you reply, taking the flowers. “Come on in. My family should be here soon.”

As you lead Max into the living room, you can’t help but feel a twinge of guilt. You haven’t exactly been forthcoming about Max’s career, telling your family only that he’s “a driver.” It wasn’t a lie, per se, but you knew they assumed he worked for a ride-sharing service or delivery company.

“Nice place,” Max comments, looking around. “Very ... homey.”

You laugh. “Is that a polite way of saying it’s nothing like your fancy Monaco apartment?”

“No, I mean it,” he insists, pulling you close. “It feels lived-in. Comfortable.”

The sound of a car pulling into the driveway interrupts your moment. “That’ll be them,” you say, your stomach doing somersaults. “Ready?”

Max squeezes your hand. “Always.”

Your parents burst through the door, arms laden with grocery bags. Your mother’s face lights up when she spots Max.

“Oh, you must be the boyfriend!” She exclaims, setting down her bags to give him a hug. “You’re even more handsome than Y/N said.”

Your father steps forward, extending a hand. “Nice to meet you, son. Heard a lot about you.”

“All good things, I hope,” Max replies with a chuckle.

As introductions are made, you can’t help but notice your parents exchanging curious glances. You know they’re dying to ask about Max’s job, but they’re too polite to broach the subject right away.

“Dinner smells amazing,” your father says, sniffing the air appreciatively. “Shall we sit down?”

Everyone gathers around the table, and you begin to serve the food. The conversation flows easily at first, with your parents asking Max about his family and where he grew up. But as the main course is cleared away, you can sense the questions they’re itching to ask.

Your mother finally breaks. “So, Max, how long have you been driving?”

Max looks momentarily confused. “Uh, professionally? Since I was 17, I guess.”

Your father’s eyebrows shoot up. “Seventeen? Isn’t that a bit young to start with Uber?”

“Uber?” Max repeats, bewildered. “I don’t-”

You quickly interject, “Dad, Max doesn’t work for Uber.”

“Oh, my mistake,” your father says, looking embarrassed. “Lyft, then?”

Max turns to you, a mix of amusement and confusion on his face. “Schatje, I think there’s been a misunderstanding.”

Before you can explain, your mother chimes in. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of, dear. Driving for those apps is honest work. We’re just curious about what it’s like.”

Max opens his mouth to respond, but you cut him off. “Mom, Dad, I think I need to clarify something. When I said Max was a driver, I didn’t mean-”

The sound of the front door slamming interrupts you. Your younger brother, Tommy, comes barreling into the dining room, out of breath and wide-eyed.

“Sorry I’m late, I was at practice and-” He stops short, his jaw dropping as he spots Max. “Holy shit! You’re Max Verstappen!”

The room falls silent. Your parents look from Tommy to Max, then back to Tommy, confusion etched on their faces.

“Language, Tommy,” your mother scolds automatically, before adding, “Wait, what did you say?”

Tommy is practically vibrating with excitement. “That’s Max Verstappen! He’s not just any driver, he’s a Formula 1 World Champion!”

Your father turns to Max, his expression a mix of shock and disbelief. “Is this true?”

Max nods, looking slightly sheepish. “Yes, sir. I’m a Formula 1 driver for Red Bull Racing.”

The silence that follows is deafening. Your mother is the first to recover, letting out a nervous laugh. “Oh my, and here we were asking you about Uber! We must look so foolish.”

“Not at all,” Max assures her, his smile warm and genuine. “It’s actually quite refreshing. Most people I meet already know everything about me.”

Your father leans forward, his interest piqued. “So, Formula 1 ... that’s the racing with the really fast cars, right?”

Max nods, launching into an explanation of the sport. As he talks, you can see your parents becoming more and more fascinated. Tommy, meanwhile, is peppering Max with questions about his latest races and rival drivers.

“I can’t believe my sister is dating Max Verstappen,” Tommy says for the third time, shaking his head in disbelief.

You feel a blush creeping up your neck. “Tommy, please ...”

Max reaches under the table to squeeze your hand. “It’s alright, liefje. I’m just glad they know now. No more secrets, yeah?”

Your mother stands up suddenly. “Oh, goodness! I completely forgot about dessert. I’ll just go fetch it.”

As she hurries to the kitchen, your father clears his throat. “So, Max, I have to ask ... is it dangerous? All that racing, I mean.”

Max considers the question carefully. “There are, of course, risks. But the cars are incredibly safe these days, and we take every precaution possible.”

Your mother returns with a homemade apple pie, setting it down in the center of the table. “I hope you like pie, Max. It’s an old family recipe.”

“It looks delicious,” Max says sincerely. “Thank you for going to all this trouble.”

As your mother serves the pie, the conversation shifts to more casual topics. You find yourself relaxing, relieved that the truth is finally out and that your family seems to be taking it well.

“So, how did you two meet?” Your father asks, between bites of pie.

You and Max exchange a glance, both smiling at the memory. “It was at a charity event in London,” you begin.

Max jumps in, “She spilled her drink all over my shoes.”

“Max!” You exclaim, swatting his arm playfully. “I did not spill it, you bumped into me!”

He laughs, holding up his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay. Maybe we bumped into each other. Either way, I’m glad it happened.”

Your mother sighs contentedly. “That’s so romantic. And now look at you two, so happy together.”

Tommy rolls his eyes. “Gross, Mom. Can we talk about racing again?”

The rest of the evening passes in a blur of laughter and conversation. As the night winds down, you find yourself in the kitchen with your mother, washing dishes while Max chats with your father and Tommy in the living room.

“He’s a lovely boy,” your mother says softly, handing you a plate to dry. “I can see why you like him so much.”

You smile, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. “Thanks, Mom. I’m sorry I wasn’t more upfront about his job. I just ... I wanted you to get to know him as a person first, you know?”

Your mother nods understandingly. “I get it, sweetheart. It must be hard, dating someone so famous. But from what I’ve seen tonight, he seems very down-to-earth.”

“He is,” you agree, glancing towards the living room where you can hear Max’s laughter mingling with your father’s. “He’s just Max to me.”

As you finish up in the kitchen, Max appears in the doorway. “Need any help?”

Your mother shoos him away. “Absolutely not, you’re our guest. Go relax.”

Max insists on helping anyway, drying the last few dishes as you and your mother put them away. The domesticity of the moment strikes you, and you find yourself imagining a future where scenes like this are commonplace.

Later, as you walk Max to his car, the cool night air nips at your skin. He wraps an arm around you, pulling you close.

“That went well, I think,” he says, a hint of relief in his voice.

You nod, leaning into him. “Better than I expected. Sorry about the Uber mix-up.”

Max laughs, the sound rumbling through his chest. “Don’t be. It was kind of fun, actually. Your family is great, by the way.”

“They liked you too,” you assure him. “Even before they knew you were famous.”

He stops at his car, turning to face you. His eyes are soft in the moonlight as he cups your face in his hands. “That’s all that matters to me. That they like me for who I am, not what I do.”

You lean in, pressing your lips to his in a gentle kiss. “I love you, Max Verstappen, Uber driver extraordinaire.”

He grins against your lips. “And I love you, Y/N Y/L/N, girl who definitely did not spill her drink on my shoes.”

[p0orbaby]

Parental Guidance

summary: you’re on the brink of a baby induced nervous breakdown and you need your wife to pull her finger out a little

warnings: just some postnatal tension, but it all works out

a/n: thank you for the request !

word count: 1.2k

-

You’re pretty sure you haven’t slept in three days. Or is it four? The baby’s a demon. This tiny, adorable, 8-pound entity that seems to thrive on your misery. His cries have melded into a never-ending soundtrack of despair, punctuated by your own hollow attempts at soothing him with a song that you made up on the spot about 48 hours ago and now can’t stop singing. It’s called “Please, for the Love of All That is Good and Holy, Sleep.”

You used to be a person. You had interests, hobbies. You read books that didn’t have the words “Goodnight” and “Moon” in the title. You once watched entire movies from start to finish without interruptions. You’re pretty sure you used to smile, and not the deranged, Joker-esque grin you’ve developed from trying to maintain your sanity while walking a screaming infant around the house at 2 a.m.

And where is your darling wife, Alexia, in all this? Nowhere to be found. Well, she’s at work, technically. Which, fine. Someone has to pay the bills, but wasn’t there some kind of brochure about shared responsibility? Maybe she’s left it in her locker, along with her soul. You barely remember what she looks like at this point. You could pass her in the hallway and just nod politely, like she’s the postman.

You’re doing your best. Really, you are. But the situation is like trying to fill a bath with a teaspoon. And maybe you’re filling the bath wrong. Maybe the bath is cursed. You’ve tried everything—rocking, singing, automatic bouncers, and some baby yoga thing that some well-meaning Instagram mum swore by but mostly just made you realise how tight your hamstrings are.

Last night, you were so desperate, you found yourself Googling “Can babies drink Nyquil?” You didn’t actually give it to him, of course, but the fact that you even considered it is telling. Your maternal instincts have been reduced to the level of a sleep-deprived zombie.

You call Alexia. She picks up after the third ring. You can hear the echo of her voice, so you know she’s in one of those soundproof meeting rooms, which would be useful for something other than work right now, like, say, your mental breakdown.

“How’s it going?” she asks, with a tone that implies she has absolutely no idea how it’s going.

“Oh, fine,” you say, with the kind of deadpan delivery that would get a standing ovation on a late-night comedy show. “The baby’s great. He’s taken up wailing as a full-time job. He’s really passionate about it, you know? Very dedicated. I think he’s trying to set a record”

You hear her exhale softly. “I’m sorry, bebè. It’s just i'm in the middle of some media stuff—”

“No, no,” you cut her off. “By all means, finish giving your opinions on that new stadium or whatever. I’m sure our baby will appreciate it when he’s, I don’t know, 18 and actually sleeping. Maybe he’ll get a job there. Or just stand outside and scream, since that seems to be his true calling”

There’s a pause on the other end. Not a comfortable pause. The kind of pause that suggests she’s realising you might not be entirely okay. The baby shrieks louder, and you realise you’re bouncing him up and down like he’s a basketball and you’re trying to make a buzzer-beater shot.

“I’ll be home soon,” Alexia says finally, her voice softer.

“Define ‘soon,’” you counter, adjusting your grip on the baby before he launches himself out of your arms and catapults into a new dimension where babies don’t need sleep. “Is it ‘soon’ like in 20 minutes, or ‘soon’ like in three hours when I’ve lost the will to live?”

Another pause, this one even worse. You’re pretty sure you can hear her wincing through the phone.

“An hour?” she offers weakly, and you let out a laugh that’s halfway between genuine and maniacal.

“Perfect,” you say. “I’ll just go cry in the airing cupboard until then. The baby and I have matching dark circles under our eyes now, so that’s fun. Maybe we’ll start a band”

You hang up before she can respond, not trusting yourself to say anything else. You’re exhausted, stretched thin, and the fact that your wife isn’t here to witness the madness is only making things worse. You know she’s working hard, that she’s doing her best, but in this moment, it feels like you’re on a sinking ship and she’s on shore, waving at you from a distance.

An hour later, when she finally walks through the door, you’re sitting in the middle of the living room floor, surrounded by a sea of baby toys, burp cloths, and what you think might be some sort of baby vomit, though at this point, who really knows?

You look up at her, and she looks back at you, and there’s a brief moment where you’re pretty sure she’s about to turn around and walk right back out the door.

Instead, she says, “I brought wine”

You blink at her, then at the bottle of wine in her hand. It’s a good bottle, too. The kind you used to drink before you had a baby and your definition of “good wine” became “whatever has the highest alcohol content and is closest to the till”

“Great,” you say, pushing yourself up off the floor with a grunt. “Let’s get the baby drunk”

She gives you a tired smile, but you can see the worry behind it. “Cariño…”

“No, it’s fine,” you say, holding up a hand. “It’s totally fine. I’m just saying, if we give him some wine, maybe he’ll sleep. Or at least pass out for a little bit. We can all get some rest. Or die. Either one sounds good at this point”

She sighs, setting the bottle down on the coffee table and coming over to you. She takes the baby from your arms, and you’re almost tempted to just collapse on the spot. Instead, you let yourself lean against her, just for a moment, just long enough to remember what it feels like to be supported by another human being.

“I’m sorry,” she says, and you can hear the guilt in her voice. “I know this is hard. I’ll try to be here more”

You nod, but you’re too tired to respond with words. Instead, you just rest your head on her shoulder and close your eyes, savouring the brief reprieve from the bedlam.

“Do you think he’s broken?” you mumble after a while. “Like, did we get a defective baby?”

Alexia chuckles softly, pressing a kiss to your temple. “No, he’s not broken. He’s just…expressive”

“Expressive,” you repeat, nodding slowly. “Right. So we got the model with all the extra emotions. Great”

“Extra emotions,” Alexia echoes, her tone lightening. “Maybe that means he’ll be a really good artist someday”

“Or he’ll just be really good at screaming,” you say, lifting your head to look at her. “You know, for someone who’s supposed to be on a team, you’ve been doing a lot of solo missions lately”

“I know,” she says softly, her eyes meeting yours. “I’m sorry. I’ll do better”

You let out a long breath, feeling the tension between you, and your shoulder, start to ease. “Okay. But if he screams one more time tonight, we’re selling him to the circus”

“Got it,” Alexia says with a smile, and for the first time in days, you feel like maybe, just maybe, you’re not going through this alone.

[gfhunklescalendar]

The 2025/2026 Gravity Falls Hunkles Calendar (print version) is now available for pre-order on Etsy! 

Additionally, digital versions of the previous calendars (2022, 2019, and 2017) and the Wayfaring Strangers art book are also for sale during (and after) the pre-order period. The old digital calendars will be $5, and Wayfaring Strangers will be $10.

The 2025/2026 Gravity Falls Hunkles Calendar features art from 21 amazing artists and is priced at $30 USD. The calendars will be 12”x 12" and saddle-stitched with a hole for hanging. 

This is a limited print run of 350 calendars, so when they’ve sold out, I will not be printing any more! Pre-orders will be available for 2 weeks, and if I somehow sell 350 calendars in that time, There’s a chance I will print more copies.

2025's "Fully Clothed Old Men: Back in Style" is a slight derivation from our previous years. More of a silly pin-up-ish calendar, this year mainly features a young Stan in all his mullet-sporting glory, but there ARE 4 months where we've given young Ford a spotlight.

2026's "Fully Clothed Old Men: The Final Layer" features senior Grunkles enjoying some more mundane adventures, like baking, doing laundry, or just chilling in front of the TV.

Both calendars feature art and holidays based on Gravity Falls (and Gravity Falls adjacent things), standard US holidays, key religious holidays, and a select number of international holidays. 

I am funding the printing for the calendars with the pre-sale money, so please be patient with the shipping/delivery time. Calendars will ship sometime in July, and I’ll be sure to announce when I’ve received the order and have begun shipping them out.

You should find that the Etsy shop will automatically figure out shipping costs for you, once you put in your address. Please, please make sure you enter your complete address correctly!

PRE-ORDER IT RIGHT HERE!!

Payment methods available are PayPal and credit card.

This is a charity project, and all proceeds will go to A New Way of Life Reentry Project!

If you'd like to help us spread the word, please reblog this post!

Or share this post over on Twitter! Cover arts by @Stephreynaart & @toasttbutt

[businessskibat]

Hyundai की धज्जियां उड़ाने आ गया ई New Maruti Baleno जबरदस्त फीचर्स के साथ लंच हुआ 

New Maruti Baleno 2024 में एक सुंदर कार खरीदना चाहते हैं तो यह लेख आपके लिए है। मारुति ऑटोमोबाइल फोर व्हीलर ने 5 सीटर हैचबेक कार न्यू मारुति बलेनो पेश की, जो अपने दमदार पॉवर और उत्कृष्ट फीचर्स के लिए जानी जाती है। इस हैचबैक कार का अट्रैक्टिव डिजाइन युवा खरीदारों को अपने और आकर्षित करता है। इसमें पावरफुल इंजन भी है, जो बेहतरीन परफॉर्मेंस और माइलेज देता है। यही कारण है कि मारुति बलेनो आपके लिए…

[woso-dreamzzz]

Second Time's The Charm VIII

Alexia Putellas x Reader

Summary: You have your baby

It all happened so quickly that Alexia didn't know what to do.

One moment, the cries of your new baby girl filled the room.

She was perfect, bright eyes and a little tuft of wispy hair.

Alexia was allowed to cut the chord.

"Hello, Elena," You said when Alexia presented her to you.

"You did so well, amor," Alexia said, eyes shining with unshed tears," I'm so proud of you."

"She's beautiful."

"Yes." A little bubble of laughter spilled out of Alexia's chest. "She is."

She'd turned away for a second. Only a second to give baby Elena to the nurse to weigh and check. It was just a second, not even that.

A hint of a second.

A bare moment of time when her eyes weren't on you.

A tiny amount of time in the grand scheme of things. Not even enough time to say a word.

You were pale, much paler than before and breathing heavily.

You were already panting through the birth but this was different. It was worse.

You were clammy and unfocused and Alexia reached for you.

Only to have her hand knocked away from you by a doctor hurrying forward.

He said words but either Alexia couldn't understand them or didn't hear them at all. His mouth moved but nothing computed.

Bags were hung up on your iv pole, something injected into you, something else put on a drip.

But you didn't look any better.

You didn't even look really present at all.

This was meant to be one of the best moments of your lives, on the top spot alongside adopting baby Maya and marrying your wife but something was wrong.

Something was so wrong.

"No," Alexia said, scrambling to force words out of her mouth," I...What's going on? No! Stop! Don't take her! Please!"

The doctors were already activating the wheels on your bed, already pulling up the guard rails.

One of the nurses caught Alexia's arms as a flurry of activity happened around her.

"Miss Putellas, y/n is haemorrhaging. Has she told you what that means?"

"Mrs," Alexia says faintly, staring down at the wedding band on her finger, hot like flames against her skin.

"What?"

She looked up at the nurse. "It's Mrs Putellas. We're married."

The nurse's features softened a fraction as she gently led Alexia to the seat by your bed.

"Y/n is bleeding. Heavily. We can keep her on a blood transfusion or we can take her to surgery but we need permission."

"S-Surgery?" Alexia's eyes widened in panic. "She's dying?! She's going to die?!"

"Miss-Mrs Putellas-"

"You need to save her," Alexia insisted, a prickling feeling in her stomach," Anything! Everything! You have to save her!"

"We'll try," The nurse promised," We're going to take her in now but, for you, do you want to wait here or down by delivery with your baby?"

"Elena."

"Huh?"

"Elena. The baby. Her name is Elena."

"That's a beautiful name."

"My wife chose it."

Alexia sat by delivery practically catatonic.

Elena was in the nursery with all the other babies, routinely checked upon but Alexia couldn't bring herself to move, mind swirling with thoughts of you and just how weak you looked in that hospital bed.

You had been smiling before she turned away. You had been happy, eager to have Elena in your arms.

The pitter patter of little footsteps was all Alexia could hear and her body turned automatically, drawing Maya closer to her.

"Mami!" Maya chirped," Abuela say our baby is here?"

"She is. Elena. Your baby sister."

At some point, Alexia had called Eli. She didn't know how. She didn't know when but Maya had been sent to Eli to babysit when you went into labour.

For her to be here now means that Alexia had called Eli.

Maya stood on her tiptoes to look into the nursey.

"Alexia-"

"Mami, they took her. She's in surgery. They're-They're-"

The sobs that had been forced down until now, sprung out full force and Alexia sobbed into her mother's shoulder.

"She's going to be okay, Alexia," Eli said," She's strong. She's going to fight."

"I want my wife, Mami," Alexia said," She didn't even get to hold Elena."

"Something wrong with Mama?"

Maya stood in front of them, bored of staring at the babies and Alexia tried to clamp down on her tears, tried to explain but her words got stuck in her throat.

"Maya," Eli took over though," Your Mama just needs to be checked out a little more. Having your baby sister-"

"Elena," Maya interrupted," Name is Elena. Mama name her."

Alexia bit on the inside of her cheek to clamp down a heart-breaking sob.

"Having Elena has taken a lot out of your Mama so the doctors are checking her over."

Maya took a step closer. "Mama is doctor. Looks after hurt people. Mama hurt? Mami, Mama hurt?"

"Mama is going to be just fine," Alexia said, desperately wishing it into existence," She's going to be perfectly fine. She just needs a bit more rest."

Maya burst into tears.

Alexia cried harder.

The clock taunted them, the hands moving slowly but surely until it was hours past since you had first been taken away.

Maya kept crying.

Alexia cries some more.

Eli kept them hydrated and fed, making stops at the café to get them food.

"Mrs Putellas?"

Alexia was up like a shot, Maya already on her hip.

"Yes? That's me! How's my wife?!"

"She-"

"My Mama going to be okay?" Maya asked.

The doctor nodded. "She suffered a post-partum haemorrhage but we performed a laparotomy. It was successful and she's being taken back to her room. Should we bring the bab-"

"Elena," Maya said," My Mama name her."

"Should we bring Elena back too?"

Alexia nodded, wiping her tears. "That would be nice."

She was by your bedside when you woke up, Maya fast asleep on her lap and a little bassinet nearby.

"Hello, my love."

"Amor, how are you feeling?"

"Like I've just been cut open," You teased but Alexia's face fell," Too soon?"

She nodded. "A little bit."

"How are our babies?"

"Maya was worried. Elena is still perfect."

"Can I see them?"

Alexia gently transferred Maya onto the bed with you. The little girl automatically curled into you in her sleep as Alexia gently lifted Elena.

"Well, hello there, beautiful girl," You cooed as Elena was placed on your chest," It's nice to finally meet you."

She was asleep too, a nice weight on your chest with her scrunched-up little face and even smaller tuft of hair.

"My love," You said," Don't cry."

Tears rolled down Alexia's face as she joined you on the other side of the bed, burying her head into your shoulder as she sobbed.

"I thought I lost you," She choked out," Amor, I was so worried. I didn't understand what was going on."

"I'm okay, Ale," You assured her, pressing a kiss to the top of her head," I'm alright."

"But you weren't. They took you to surgery."

"And they saved me, Ale," You said," They saved me and I'm here, with you and our children and I'm not going anywhere."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

[stagbeetleboy]

Bc starwars has those heavy ass automatic doors do you think instead of saying “don’t let the door hit you on your way out” it would be more appropriate to say “don’t let the door crush you to death on your way out”? While making excessive eye contact during the delivery of the phrase.