#autism betrayal

[loth-creatures]

Going about my day like holy shit I am disabled. Goddamn. Wtf.

[heuldoch7b]

[bleue-flora]

So, if in the finale c!Dream’s helmet, that he takes off for c!Tommy, represents his mask, does that mean that when c!Sapnap puts on c!Dream’s armor, Nightmare, he is putting on and stealing c!Dream’s mask? - Because I’m not gonna lie that really puts a new perspective on that betrayal… Furthermore, when c!Techno brings c!Dream armor in prison, did he make him a mask and bring it to him… and then take away the mask later? - If so, again that’s kinda screwed up. Though you could argue that perhaps he made c!Dream a mask for the jailbreak so he had one to face the server with and then because they were trying to not seem like allies he took it back, knowing that c!Dream would get another one. Which also begs the question, did c!Punz make c!Dream a mask for after prison or is he simply handing over one of c!Dream’s masks?… When c!Tommy in the minecart skirmish stole c!Dream’s armor, was he taunting him with his own mask? - Because oof that’s some serious violation and disrespect…

In other words, if you think that c!Dream’s helmet in the finale represents the mask (which I’d say is implied by c!Tommy) does that same logic apply across the board or is it just for that moment? And if it does apply to rest of the lore, wow does that have some implications…

[cookie-nom-nom]

man the ‘no boundaries pretending to be polite to people he can’t stand’ toshiro combined with the ‘alienated yet desperate to do anything to make people like him’ Kabru in one episode is such a gut punch to me as an autistic people pleaser. Having a minor crisis rn Kui what the hell

[transcendencepheonix]

You want me to talk when you want me to talk and you want me to be what you want me to be. And that's not fair.

I thought you would have been different.

But your just like everyone else.

[autisticmind]

For an autistic person to "give up" on you entirely, to leave your life after any kind of real relationship it generally takes quite a lot— of mistakes and/or simply pushing them away.

They probably gave and gave until they couldn't anymore, past what they even thought they could until it became too draining, too much and they were forced, by one limitation or another to stop.

Because, in my experience, autistic/neurodivergent people are more persistent— they gain and lose interest/attachment far more quickly, or completely in general.

Don't lose someone like that, who will put in and maintain the effort to help and fix things as much as possible.

[myrmica]

infinity mechanism/worst breakup in minecraft roleplay history.mp4

[gods-favorite-autistic]

A list of things I know I won’t be ready for in the pjo series:

Everything about May Castellen

Having to watch an actual ten year old Nico Di Angelo ask where his sister is

Beckendorf

Silena

Annabeth and Luke

Thalia and Luke

I can see the stars again my lady (my fucking HEART)

Like half of the battle of manhattan let’s be real

[vulpine111]

I don't know why I want an apology from someone who hates disabled people so badly. What is Sam supposed to say?

"Sorry I kicked you when you were down and I am sorry I can't respect you because you are disabled. I'm sorry, I just don't care about your feelings or happiness because you're less than human to me and always will be for reasons you can't even help."

The best thing she can do is leave me alone, I think. She's the one who doesn't deserve to know me. She is the one missing out on a great friendship. Not the other way around.

It's not a loss that she cut me out of her life.

I should be happy the trash took out itself!

[thatonegaybrit]

; sigh. feeling great but why does my wrist not have the ability to bend backwards, it'd make stimming aggressively ( /pos ) much easier. the limitations of my flexibility disappoints me.

[weird-gay-disaster]

Uh, so this is really out of left field for me to talk about, but I've been feeling this type of way for over a month now.

I'm very ambivalent about the new Famicom Detective Club.

Before the game's reveal and when we basically had a teaser to go off of, there was a lot of speculation (jokes, memes, or otherwise) over what the project could've been. I'm not much of a survival horror enjoyer, I was just interested in what it could've potentially been. I noticed some accurate leaks about it beforehand, but didn't think they were legit.

When it was fully announced, I basically went "oh. okay..." before feeling a growing sense of disappointment and embarrassed for having such an autistic level of obsession over the teaser. Not because of it being a visual novel, but the fact that it was a certain type of visual novel from a series I genuinely did not care that much about. And the way it was described in Yoshio's interview (mainly the part where the ending was described as "divisive for some people") made me think "oh...so THAT'S how it's gonna go...").

And I probably wouldn't be so vexed with it if I didn't notice a number of FDC's (supposed) fans responding to some similarly disappointed people by...basically insulting them. Because...that'll make people want to enjoy the obscure, niche thing you seem to care about so deeply.

What made things even worse was when I noticed a certain Twitter profile (@WhoIsEmio) and thought it was an ARG linked to the teaser somehow, especially since the bio linked to Nintendo's Emio website/the new Famicom Detective Club game website. There were somewhat sporadic, cryptic uploads with seemingly random Japanese words and music (?) that I assumed would've hinted at certain plot points of the game.

So imagine my shock & disbelief when I eventually found out this shit was apparently an AI experiment from a college that may not exist. And this apparently has nothing to do with the actual game (which creates a number of...interesting questions as to how they even knew about certain dates revealing more FDC information...). It legitimately made me want to jump off a building or something.

Uh, so for the demo (as of Ch. 2 right now)...

I think the music's pretty nice...and the mystery is at least interesting enough...the antagonist is pretty menacing & enigmatic so far....

But....

I'm not saying it needs to be like Danganronpa (especially since that series has issues with a good number of its character designs being increasingly more derivative), but...the character designs here are REALLY bland and boring to look at (besides the main antagonist himself). It's like it's trying to go for a more "anime/stylized realism" angle, but it ends up looking very cookie-cutter instead. Many visual novels, even with all their flaws, at least have some interesting art direction, so seeing how it is here felt very lackluster.

And the writing...the mystery itself is fine so far, but much of the regular dialogue between characters incites little to no emotion within me. Beyond certain key characters, I personally didn't feel that much for the main cast.

When I got to the point where you had to wait at a bus shelter before deciding whether or not to call a taxi, the pure silence and the angle made me paranoid enough that I assumed Emio was either watching from the background or was about to creep up to the protagonist as he closed his eyes to...somehow summon a taxi. Needless to say, it felt anticlimactic when neither of those things happened.

I might continue looking into this, but very likely via a playthrough online (and not just because I'm currently poor).

[misspermitted]

Sometimes it’s just you and that dirty cup in the corner of your room that has been there for 3 weeks and you gives you daily anxiety but you still won’t clean. It’s about the chemistry. The will they won’t they. The mutual pining but oh no I can’t give in. Stolen glances across the room. Oh the torture. Even when my eyes are off you I’m thinking of you.

[d0d0-b0i]

she took the fucking coke cans from my room again. AND drank the half of the coke can i left in the fridge while we were eating. she never even considered that someone mightve opened the can and left it for later. my life is in shambles

[productofaritual]

Unmasking is such a bizarre experience like wdym not everyone feels the urge to click their tongue and whistle when they're bored or anxious and that now I'm unmasking I'm actually supposed to do that and I'll feel better

[ghostofaudhdpast]

recently i’ve learned about “betrayal trauma” and “complex partner trauma” and it’s really opened my eyes to ummmm a lot.

i’ve had thoughts for a while about being afab/perceived as female and the way my autism has made me particularly vulnerable to abuse from past partners (all cishet men)

i’ve been single for a long time and i’m still processing a lot of the trauma i’ve dealt with, over and over, because i repeated the same pattern with multiple partners.

lots of cheating, lots of lack of informed consent, lots of gaslighting and lying.

and learning the terms betrayal trauma (and betrayal violence) and complex partner trauma and what those entail has been really helpful.

[autisticmind]

I suppose I am "crazy", for sometimes trying to reason or logic people out of their intense emotions— I know it's in all likelihood futile, but I can't always help trying anyway, and then some people assume it's for some awful reason instead of informing for the usually sole purpose of understanding.

When I discuss down to the details, I am making a sincere effort to promote connection rather than hinder it, providing all knowledge possible to make the best decision possible— at least, that is my intent.