#ate lunch and now i want to kms

[breakbreadwithme]

i wish it was easier to not be sad

[stellewriites]

Part Two

Summary: When John gets an unexpected invite to his ex-wife’s wedding, he scrambles to find a suitable date to take with him to ward off old ghosts from his past.

Notes: trans John, fat reader, subtle transphobia from minor characters

John was sat in his flat watching a Match of the Day rerun for a football game he’d missed while away when his phone buzzed on the kitchen counter.

His head swivelled over to it to see if it buzzed again, determining it unimportant enough to ignore for the time being when it stayed silent. Kate always called, so it wasn’t work and anyone else that was texting him after 9pm could wait.

It buzzed a second time, then a third and a fourth in quick succession and he felt curiosity twinge at the base of his skull. He pushed himself up, ignoring when one of his knees popped, and grabbed his phone.

Your name flashed up on the screen and he opened the chat without hesitation.

>> the photos from today, don’t forget to swap them out :)

He flicked through the photos you’d sent before picking one at random to save.

John sat back on his couch and agonised over swapping his lock screen.

It was currently an old photo of Charlotte from their honeymoon, and it had stayed that way this entire time in spite of the divorce. He had kept her there even when he’d removed her photos from his desk and was unable to put any up in his new flat. His little secret. Though he knew Kate had seen it despite his best efforts to leave his civilian phone at his flat or turned off during his office hours.

But now…

He felt almost queasy as he selected the new photo. It felt like the first of many final nails in the relationship’s coffin that John would have to deal with over the next month in the lead up to Charlotte’s big day.

It felt like he was mourning a relationship already six years dead.

---

John adapted quickly to seeing your face on his phone screen at the end of the day over the next two weeks, even if he did miss seeing Charlotte’s cheery smile, and found it just as easy to accept seeing your name pop up more and more frequently when you messaged with a new question you’d thought of regarding the wedding or your fake relationship.

It was easy to talk to you, he found. Easy to let his guard down just a tinge and to try and bury the hurt he felt.

>> what’s a childhood story you’d have told me about a couple months in?

<< I fell out of a tree when I was 12, was meant to be grounded at the time so I had to walk home with broken ribs and a scraped up arm and leg. Tried to pretend nothing had happened when my mum got back from work, but it didn’t fool her.

>> i broke my arm climbing a tree too, maybe one of our dates should’ve been at a forest climbing adventure place lol

<< You wouldn’t have wanted to be wined and dined?

>> sure but it can get a little boring

>> you wouldn’t have wanted to hypothetically stare at my arse cinched in climbing gear?

>> were there food options for the wedding? like on planes? i’m not a veggie so you dodged a bullet if you chose a main with meat but i do love pasta if we’re able to swap last minute

<< Everyone loves pasta.

<< And no, think it’s an open buffet.

>> i’ll bring a doggy bag for snacks on the way home then

>> waste not, want not

<< Say that in front of my dad and he might just add you to his will.

>> this is the dress I have in mind, what do you think?

<< Good choice.

>> glowing praise, john, i’ll take that as it won’t cause a scandal among the locals

<< Don’t think you’ll be the one causing a scandal, Sunshine.

It was in a rare occasion he’d texted you first that you arranged to meet up a second time. He’d asked about the plans you’d mentioned a few days back and was currently waiting for a reply while he tried to slog through his own work.

>> was super excited for the play today but I think I might have to cancel my tickets, my friend was driving us there but her kid has gotten sick so she can’t go now :/

<< Where were you going?

>> it’s at a park on the other side of the city with the outdoor stage, i could grab a couple of buses but i don’t know if i’d make it in time

John put down the dry sandwich he was eating and looked at the meeting reports he’d been ignoring for the last ten minutes while texting you.

<< I’ll come pick you up.

>> really??

<< Sure. Send me your address and I’ll be there soon, Sunshine.

John had barely parked up outside your house before you were opening the door and giving him an excited smile and wave.

“I love stuff like this anyway, but this community group have put on some amazing portrayals of Shakespeare’s plays over the years despite their low budget and they make it so accessible with cheap tickets and the outdoor venue. It’s cut down so the teens performing have a better chance at remembering their lines, but it’s always one hell of a forty-five minute show. I think it’s Othello this time, but honestly I’d watch anything,” you rambled as you buckled your seatbelt. “It’s always good to support local art.”

“So we’re seeing Shakespeare?” John confirmed.

“It’s at the open air theatre inside the park.”

“Been a while since I went to the theatre, longer than that since I’ve been in a park.”

“What do you do in your off time?” You asked with a snort.

“Don’t get much off time,” John said easily, unbothered. It was him after all that had decided work would become his priority.

“Well then I’m glad we’re getting to see this together,” you said. “I’ve had a pretty long week too.”

“Hm?”

At his inquisitive hum you fell into complaining about your managers and the long, tiring shifts you pulled.

It didn’t take you long in the car to get to the park however and you were soon jumping out. You gaped a little when John got out and joined you at the front of the car.

“Holy hell you’re tall, shit a brick,” you said, staring. You’d noticed he was broad at the café and he seemed to fill the cab of his pick-up, but he’d been slumped and seated both times so you’d assumed he was maybe creeping just below 6’ and the rest was his attitude that made him seem all encompassing. Looking at him stood up to his full height now was something else, even as he tucked his chin down and slumped his shoulders to speak with you. “I think we’ll have to sit at the back for this or someone might complain.”

John rolled his eyes but you saw the hint of a smile play at his lips as he agreed.

You led him eagerly to the crowd you could see gathering at the entrance of the outdoor stage; the front four rows of the small open air auditorium had been unfolded for the event, suggesting the size of the crowd expected. You both elected to take a seat on the back row as others started to head to the front, but he nudged you fondly when he saw you shift excitedly waiting for it to start.

John pulled out his phone when he felt it buzz in his pocket, but put it back when he saw it was just a reminder to sort out his tux for the wedding.

“Cute pic,” you said with a sly smile when you caught his lock screen. “We should take another, might be more convincing if we have more than one photo of us doing stuff together, right?”

John leant into your side and hesitantly wrapped his arm around you, stiff where it draped over the back of your seat, for the photo.

You were no better, your smile suddenly tight at the corners as you took a quick snap. You held your breath until he moved back, his aftershave surprisingly enticing and the warmth and weight of his arm too inviting.

It wouldn’t do for you to become attracted to John, not that it was something you could control, you knew. But maybe if you just wished it hard enough it wouldn’t make the weekend away with him more difficult than it had to be; falling for a man still blatantly in love with his ex never ended well for anyone.

You smiled a little weakly at him when nudged you again, nodding at the community group making their way onto the stage in front of the clapping crowd.

Maybe attraction would be fine you decided, already knowing how impulsively forgetful and weak-willed you got when your vibrator was between your legs - you could already imagine his name slipping through loose lips, and you couldn’t blame yourself for it as you sneakily took in his side profile - just as long as there were no real feelings from your side.

---

You’d graduated from texting to calling when John mentioned one night that he found it hard to multitask while at work. You’d offered to leave him alone and talk to him once he was done later but he’d been quick to interrupt, said instead that although he couldn’t text and write at the same time, he’d be fine talking and writing.

It’s how he found himself sat at his desk with his phone propped next to him on speaker, listening to you complain about the shitty restaurants near your work.

“I need to get back into meal prepping, or at least start buying something nicer pre-made to bring for lunch. If I have to eat another Greggs meal deal I think I’ll throw up, John,” you bemoaned.

“There’s a new place just opened up ‘round the corner to you, you know?” He said, checking over his team’s reports before signing them off. At your interested hum he continued. “Greek place I think. The sergeants went the other day, said it was a good menu and they’re usually quite picky about where they spend their free time together.”

“That sounds perfect, I’ll meet you there in twenty?” You asked rhetorically, already gathering your stuff to take your lunch break. “I can order for us both in case it takes you longer so it’ll be served by time you arrive. See you in a bit, bye!” You didn’t wait for him to confirm or reply in any capacity, too excited for a delicious lunch.

John stared down at his phone where the screen fell black through lack of use at the ended call. He took a moment to recount the conversation and where he’d gotten mixed up before reluctantly dropping his pen and grabbing his coat and keys.

He stopped by Simon’s office on his way out.

“I’m heading out for a quick lunch, won’t be back in time for that meeting with Laswell after all so you’ll need to take notes.” He waited for Simon’s nod before knocking once on the doorframe in thanks and leaving.

Sure he could’ve just sent you a quick text to correct you, or rang you back to explain it was just a recommendation and he didn’t have the time to join you.

But he didn’t want to. He wanted to go eat Greek food with you until you were humming happily and rubbing your soft stomach, comfortably full on more than a lukewarm pasty and sad looking iced donut. He wanted to hear about your day at work so far and what you’d been up to with your friends on Saturday evening when your replies had slowed down.

He wanted.

It had been a long time since John had felt that way. Given most of the people he’d consider friends were people he worked with and kept their personal lives close to their chests, it wasn’t often he wanted to do much more than spend a couple hours in a pub after a rough mission with them.

You were quickly solidifying yourself a space in John’s life as a friend, whether you knew it or not. Whether you liked it or not. And as a result, he didn’t want to leave you to eat on your own knowing you to be a social butterfly, even after such a short time. John was known to be protective - some had said possessive - of those he considered his. And being his friend meant that you would given the same effort of care and consideration that he gave his team, it just needed to be applied differently.

It wouldn’t be through proud shoulder pats after a mission well-done or through unshakeable confidence and trust when he put his life on the line stood side-by-side with the 141.

No, it would be pulling up to hole in the wall restaurants last minute so that you could spend your lunch a little happier than you were when you were sat at your desk.

He found you sat at the back table, the seat facing the front windows and door left free for him to take with silent appreciation.

The food was as good as Gaz and Soap had promised it would be and the sight of you scarfing down baklava before you had to head back to work had him grinning into his glass.

“Christ, I might have to get a to-go box of this for tonight,” you groaned lowly.

“Big plans?” John asked, clearing his throat.

“Just some DIY I’ve been putting off around the house, figure if I entice myself with a treat for after it’s done I’ll be more likely to actually do it.” You go to take your last bite before pausing and pointing at John. “And before you say it, I realise it sounds like how you train a puppy.”

John snorted, but a frown pulled low on his brow. “What needs fixing?”

“My front door is scraping low when I open it, hinges are loose I think. Nothing major but I’d rather not fuck it up, you know? But if I leave it any longer then I’ll need to pay someone to deal with some real damage,” you sighed. “So I’ve borrowed my neighbour’s drill.”

“I’ll do it for ya,” John offered out of nowhere.

“What? No, you don’t have to, you’re busy,” you declined.

“It’s fine, I’ll pop by later tonight. Just let me know when you’re home and I’ll swing by and sort it.”

“I, uh, ok. Sure, thanks, John. I appreciate it,” you said with a grateful, if not bemused, smile.

---

As soon as you opened the door that evening, John noticed how the bottom caught.

“Hi, do you want a drink? A tea?” You offered as you let him in.

“I’d love one, thanks, Sunshine.” He stepped inside and placed his drill case by the doorframe.

“Oh, you brought your own drill? You didn’t have to go home for it, did you?” You fretted as you headed towards the kitchen. “Did I not mention I’d borrowed my neighbour’s?”

“You did. But this was in the back of the truck from Simon borrowing it, it’s not a big deal,” John lied. He’d stopped off to grab it after your lunch together. “Wasn’t sure what your neighbour’s drill was going to be like, but I know this’ll get the job done proper.”

You bit back an amused smile and hummed your assent down the hall as you waited for the electric kettle to boil.

“Thanks again for helping out, John. I can get by doing my own DIY usually; not to brag but I’m kind of a pro at assembling IKEA furniture. Sometimes though it helps having a second person look it over too.” You walked back to the front door as you spoke and held his tea for him as he set up the drill to match the screws in the door.

“It’s no hassle,” he said before setting to work.

A quick three minutes later your door was once again in full working order, no longer sticking when it swung open and closed.

“Good as new,” he said. You passed him his drink, still hot, and grinned, leading him to sit on the couch for a moment. “If y’need anything else fixing up or looking at, just let me know. I’d be happy to help.”

“Opened the floodgates with that offer. You’ll be regretting it soon enough,” you said with a laugh. “This place is a bit of a fixer-upper, ‘s why I could afford it in the first place.”

“You’ve done a good job with it,” he said earnestly, looking around the cosy living room. Would be better if you weren’t alone, he thought suddenly, unbidden. He took a deep sip of his drink and avoided eye contact. “I like being useful, you might as well take advantage of it since no one else is at the moment.”

You smiled softly. “That’s all the permission I need.”

His phone vibrated in his pocket and he slipped it out to see a text from his mum.

>> Make sure your date isn’t wearing white, luv. I’m sure she’s a lovely girl, but we wouldn’t want to spoil Charlotte’s day would we? xxx

<< Her dress is green, nothing to worry about mum. xx

>> Green is a bold choice, must be quite the lady to pull that off! Give her my love. xxx

John sighed as he put his phone down and caught your eye in his peripheral.

He smiled tiredly to ease your worried frown.

“Just my mum checking in, she gives you her love,” he said.

“Mm. She gives you a headache,” you pointed out. “Wedding shit still?”

“It’s her prime focus right now. It’ll be done soon.”

“You want a paracetamol? I’ll top up your tea.” You reached forward for his empty cup.

“Got something stronger?” John asked hopefully.

You winced. “I’ve got a gin ‘n’ tonic in a can that my friend left the other day? Can’t even offer you a strong coffee because it’s decaf.”

“Jesus,” he groaned through a laugh. “Another tea it is.”

---

The morning of the wedding came sooner than you’d expected. The dress that you’d carefully hung on your wardrobe door to avoid creases all those weeks ago would finally be put to use.

You got up early enough to get yourself ready, nervousness unsettling your stomach enough that you stuck to only a slice of toast for breakfast with a strong coffee.

>> Setting off now, I’ll be at yours in 20.

<< you mean you’ll be here by 0900 🫡

>> Funny.

>> See you soon.

You chuckled to yourself as you grabbed your things so you were ready to go when John arrived and double checked everything was locked up for the weekend.

The knock on your door had your heart jump and pound double-time in your chest before you shook your hands out and told yourself to fucking chill. It was just John.

“Hi, you ready to— oh, you look, uhm…” John trailed off as he took in the flowing silk dress you’d bought. He’d seen it before, of course, but now seeing you in it and the way it clung to your curves and highlighted your plush tummy and wide hips had his tongue heavy and lost in his mouth. He swallowed thickly as he looked back up to your face, trying not to linger on the plunged neckline and what it did for your tits, and felt his cheeks redden when he noticed your own flustered, wide-eyed look as you stood and watched him. “You look very nice,” he finished lamely.

“Right, good, thanks.” You tried to force a laugh but your throat felt too dry, even as you grinned at his red cheeks. “You clean up pretty well too,” you said instead and reached your hand out to brush against the neatened trim of his beard, his muttonchops less pronounced.

He stiffened at the unexpected touch, not disliking it, but a memory of Charlotte doing something similar had him flinching back. Charlotte, he remembered, would usually only rub at his beard with a frown and ask when he was going to go clean shaven again.

You didn’t know that however and you snatched your hand back to your side as you felt a chill drop from your chest down to your toes like a bucket of cold water. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have done that,” you apologised.

“No, it’s fine. Just caught me off guard,” he said, trying to ease your suddenly tense shoulders and cursing himself for getting lost in old memories.

He led you to the car and held open the door for you, smiling when you thanked him and tucked in your dress to avoid its long length getting trapped in the door.

Once he was sat in the drivers seat he hesitated for a moment before turning to face you.

“‘M glad you like it,” he said with a quick gesture to his beard. “I was thinking about shaving it off for the occasion.”

You winced reflexively at the thought, teeth gritted and bared as you tried to picture him without facial hair. He let out a deep rumble of a laugh, throaty and unfiltered, as you tried to square your face back to a neutral expression, though your eyebrows wouldn’t pull back from their frown.

“I’m sure that would’ve looked… sweet,” you hedged carefully.

John only snorted.

You huffed and rolled your eyes. “Ok I’m a terrible liar,” you started, glaring when John muttered an amused, you don’t say. “If you want to shave and like how it looks, then we can detour back to yours and I’m sure you’ll look just as handsome in whatever photos you’re forced to pose for. But if you’re asking for my opinion? Then I think this suits you better, it’s more distinguished. You’d have looked too much like a banker if you’d shaved and wore a suit,” you said with an exaggerated shiver.

John hummed a chuckle, his shoulders shaking with it. “I’m sure the word you’re thinking of rhymes with banker, Sunshine.”

It was your turn to snort a laugh at that.

“Your words, not mine, John.”

“Cheeky. Put your bloody seatbelt on,” he huffed, a smile pulling at his lips as he started the car. “Suddenly thinking this drive might feel ten times longer than usual for some reason.”

You rolled your eyes and didn’t dignify his jab with a response. Tried not to focus on your pulse racing in excitement.

masterlist

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling mom to stop giving me unhealthy food and then refusing to say "I love you" back?

I (16, FtM) am autistic, for the longest time I struggled with eating different types of foods, in fact, i only started eating vegetables when I was 16 because my nutritionist told me to. Since I have memory, i've been teased by my weight, all my life. It led me to make decisions i'm not very proud of (like getting groomed at 8-9 years old), because of my low self esteem.

I've gone to the nutritionist a total of 2 times in my life, but in my opinion i should've gone more but my parents didn't seem to think the same. Both of those times the doctors told me I was a little overweight. They didn't tell me i was obese or morbidly obese which thank god because I would've broken down and kms (not really but even thinking of getting told that makes me anxious).

They did tell me to start eating more food other than fried food and other type of stuff. After the meeting, my parents started scolding me for embarrassing them in front of the doctor, but all i did was being brutally honest with her! I told her how my parents keep buying flavored water which has at least 2 stamps in it (The government makes it so that companies have to put stamps on their products saying what's exactly in it), so the only source of natural water is the one we boil ourselves, which i drink every time i do exercise. And also how the dinner mom makes is sausages and french fries, it's quick and easy. This last week I've eating that dinner two times and on the weekend i ate fast food for lunch, on Saturday and Sunday which means TWICE. By the end I was so worried i might have to double my exercise next week (so now) to balance it off. I felt really fat on monday so uh not a good feeling.

For my part, I've had this discussion with my P.E teacher, and she agreed to make me play basketball more so i can both exercise at home and more at school other than P.E class. I've also done the effort of eating vegetables (which due to my autism it was very hard at first but I've gotten the hang of it!) And doing more exercise at school.

But even when mom agreed to start feeding me more healthy foods, it's like she gave up. She's gone back to giving me the same lazy foods that are filled with cholesterol and grease, and every time i eat those it makes me feel worried. Tonight was one of those dinners and all i want is to get it out of my system (literally).

I told mom she can't keep feeding me like this if she wants me to lose weight, and she responds by saying "but what can we feed you? You don't eat anything else" which? Fucking excuse me? WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST MONTHS??? She always says that, it's like whenever i eat entire salads she fucking ignores me or something! It makes me feel so angry, fuck my efforts i guess???

I got more angry, but she's my mom, so i decided to shut up. Since i was getting ready to bed once i got comfortable she told me "I love you", which is a normal habit we have every time i go to bed. She says "i love you" i say it back. But this time I didn't, and she just sighed and closed the door.

Right now i'm really mad at her, but i recognize that maybe not saying "I love you" back was a bit too much, but if i have to stop saying it at all for her to understand I want to lose weight, then so be it. If she doesn't want to recognize im the only one doing the effort, whatever. I'm thinking of starting to refuse her food to make myself clear.

What are these acronyms?

[tapiokauwu]

this morning my dad told me "you look nicely thin in the morning because you haven't eaten... after lunch you get fatter haha"

wtf is wrong with him? I honestly don't know.

I fell asleep again and skipped lunch and I woke up at like 6 pm and ate something, but now I feel bad and guilty and I want to kms lol

[ibeblizzard10]

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. I was doing hella well w my liquid diet on day 3 and then my mom asked if I could try some high cal dessert she made except she doesn’t give me a choice and I keep saying “no, I don’t want it it’s gross.” Which is true btw I really hate that dessert. But she keeps persisting so I take a bite and even tho I hate it and I don’t have to finish it I do probably cuz it’s the first solid food I’ve had for almost 3 days 😭 thankfully I didn’t eat anything else but I ate it at 3 pm and I was trying to fast for 24 after lunch so now I fucking hate myself and I wanna die and I tried to run on my walking pad but I couldn’t do it for more than 5 minutes cuz I felt like I was gonna faint. And the worst part is she offered the dessert to my sister and father and they both declined and she immediately left them alone and it’s not like I didn’t pretend to eat in front of my mom 2day either I pretended to eat pasta and then I spit it out when she wasn’t looking but u digest a third of the calories still if u chew and spit so that’s why I want to fast for a bit omg I wanna Kms I don’t deserve to live I’m so fat ughhh and don’t think my mom “saw my wl cuz I gained 1.4 lb on day 1 of liquid diet and on day 2 I only lost 0.4 lb so in total I gained 1 lb on this fucking diet so I’m gonna fast from now on starting at 3 pm 11/10/2024 until 8 am 11/12/2024 😭😭😤😖😤😭😤😖😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😖😖😖😖😣😖😥😰🫥😓😣😔😞☹️😩😫😖😣😭😢😤😠😡😰😤🙂‍↕️😕😤😤

[l111ae]

Rant

I’m gonna kms, we have so much chocolate in the house and i can’t stop eating! I want to throw everything away but then I’ll fell guilty about wasting food my parent bought but I can’t go on like this. It’s so draining living in a house with a lot of snacks when I’m trying to restrict. And I can’t ever thr0w it up because it just doesn’t work

The worst thing is that I was so good today until now. I skipped breakfast ate a little lunch and went to the gym and now I’ve thrown it a away

[aminocamino]

Day 16 - 25 April Atapuerco to Burgos 20.6km and 126m

We left our lovely albergue (not!) as early as we could - out by 7.20am. Ate at a lovely cafe in Cardenuela Ropica. Nothing much to say about the route to Burgos. It wasn’t the most attractive walking.

You could see Burgos 14 km out but it took forever to get to. There was alot of new roadwork going on and at one point we ended up on what looked like a main road bridge with a very narrow pilgrim walk path which suddenly disappeared. Had to go over the barrier onto the road.

We took the ‘green route’ to Burgos which was meant to avoid the industrial landscape on the outskirts of Burgos. Ended up skirting an airfield instead!

Initial path was rough terrain, came to the famous cross and I laid a stone in memory of dad. The landscape was strange, a very high plain with a military zone on one side. We could see for miles but we were 3,000 feet up!

We see lots of Camino signs on the way. Loved how colourful this old bus advertising an albergue was.

The industrial landscape - some more interesting than the rest. We took the riverside route into Burgos and it was through this huge park , lovely to start off but after 7 or 8km felt incredibly punishing after the rest of the walk. Neither of us felt it was going to end. Now I would choose the industrial route just to get some variety!

We got to the hotel at 12.30 just to drop our backpacks off. Check in wasn’t till 4pm so we headed out for a light lunch and wandered round the shops to stock up on essentials. Found a love little pattiserie serving the mist delicious cakes. Two coffees and two cakes - 8€.

Our apartment is clean, slap bang in the centre and we have a little kitchenette and washing machine. Utter bliss!

In the evening we wanted food at our normal time of around 6.30/7.00. But all the restaurants open at 7.30/8.00 in the evening. Nothing in the larger places caters for peregrinos. We found a pasta place in the end after much googling…and it felt like the best pasta ever.

[realfunnotfun]

Day 1 &2 of following my 3 simple rules of weight loss that I put for myself:

For anyone who doesn’t know, yesterday I made 3 rules for myself: weigh myself once a week, drink 1.5L of water a day and stay under 1000kcal.

Tw: mention of food, and restriction.

Day 1 was yesterday, I drank 1.5L of water, ate way beyond my 1000kcal goal but at least I didn’t binge ig.

I failed bcs I wanted to eat smth sweet at night but I didn’t have any so I ate another lunch portion.

I noticed that I always have sweets cravings at night so today I bought some hot chocolate drinks and some chocolates so that I can eat them at night to not binge my ass off, I know that it still counts but I would say 150-200kcal is better than 500+.

As of today (Day 2):

I stuck to my goal of not weighing myself and I’m gonna drink my 1.5L in a bit but I didn’t stick to my kcal limit 😭😭

I know, disappointing but listen 1450kcal is better than a binge ig (I’m trying to cope)😭😭😭😭

Starting from tmrw I wanna actually stick to all of my goals, my main goal is to notice why I fail and fix it so that I can have a personalized plan for me.

Update: I had 800 more calories just now, I wanna kms hehe

[wanderella-w]

A stormy adventure

The storm was going to start on Thursday evening so on our way to our campsite in Porthleven we had our fingers crossed that there would be a sheltered spot on the campsite to pitch our tent. And there was! Actually the whole campsite was quite sheltered from the wind but it took us 20-30 minutes to find the most sheltered spot, a sloped grass triangle near the pub and sanitary building. It started raining when we were cooking dinner and the friendly women from the pub let us have our dinner inside. We ordered coca cola (Ella) and sparkling water (Rosa) with it and stayed in the pub all evening. I swapped my book in the bookshelf there, 'De meermin' for 'The girl with the dragon tattoo '... a bit too heavy actually but I don't regret it so far.

The next day about five people warned us for the storm and called us silly or crazy to go hiking. But there was also a man we talked to in the café where we had coffee that morning, to sit out at least a part of the storm, saying that it was safe going on the path because the wind was blowing onshore. Also we had only 14 km planned for the day and we were really looking forward to the pod we had already booked on a National Trust campsite, so we said to each other that we would at least try it. And it went well! We avoided parts of the coast path by taking inland routes and parts of it we just did, with the typical broad-legged wind-fast walk, and Emma looking like a balloon in her rain cape. The sea looked really cool, big waves and lots of foam on the beaches. When we had lunch we thought we had found a sheltered spot but the wind found it's way between the lifeguard house, dixi toilet and shrubs, and blew sand on my chiabatta with cream cheese and rucola. It was delicious anyways.

It stopped going well behind Million Cove. On a plateau the wind was blowing so hard that you just wanted to walk really fast to escape it. However, the shrubs and swampy grass made that impossible and it also started raining heavily. We weren't really on the path anymore, not sure if it was too muddy, to close to the cliff or if we were just blown off it. I half-jogged in between Emma and Rosa and fell twice, a lot of water from the puddles came into my shoes. After a while we could give in to the wind and take a turn left, inland, towards our pod. Now it was only a 10 minute walk along a sheltered road with hedges around it, what a difference. Our pod was great, it was like camping (no kitchen bathroom or anything, just a wooden tent ) but we had a heating, one power socket and matrasses called tuffies. It smelled like in a sauna. I took a nap and in the evening we drank tea and ate biscuits on the floor.

[krunchylegs]

kms just binged on cheesecake 😭😭 it was just supposed to be a quick chew and spit and thats what happened, like i only wasted one slice so i didnt feel bad but then i just looked at the quarter of cheesecake left and since no one was really eating it i was all like, "well maybe if i cut off a little bit and eat that then it wont matter" and then i basically ate it all 💔

it was like the only thing in the house that made me want to impulsively eat so at least its gone but i feel so guilty bc i feel like ive eaten someone elses food and on top of that i already chew and spat so much bc i chew and spat quarter of it when it was first opened and then today with the one slice, and now ive actually eaten a quarter, like bro i really couldnt have been content with the cheesecake that ive already wasted?????? anyway 😔 i have my meals set out for the next 3 days and im not going to eat outside of them so yeah, im not doing that out of response to the cheesecake but i am going to increase my steps which atm is 12k a day but bc of the cheesecake idek how many steps i want to increase bc of it but ill span it out over the 3 days ive meal planned.. i feel sick rn tho and for the last 2 days ive been bloated so hopefully after my planned meal days ill feel better

my plan for the next 3 days:

Day 1:

breakfast:

Apple + coffee

Lunch:

2 eggs + tomato

Dinner:

Protein bar + green tea

Day 2:

breakfast:

banana + coffee

lunch:

chicken + tomato

Dinner:

Protein bar + green tea

Day 3:

breakfast:

Soya yogurt + coffee

Lunch:

2 eggs + tomato

Dinner:

Protein bar + green tea

P.s. tbh im doing this bc im not feeling like tracking cals every single day so im giving myself a break from that while knowing im still in a deficit, also i got inspired by a youtube video diet thing, not the biggest fan of fad diets but i think doing this will give me more inspiration when it comes to making low cal meals. ALSO LOOK AT ME FIGURING OUT HOW TO CHANGE THE COLOURS OF THE TEXT?!?!?! still figuring tumblr out 😭❤

[leonora0704]

Omggg

I know I haven’t posted in like weeks but …idk

This is my first vlogand I’m really excited to write🎀📝

anyways yesterday I really FUCKING messed up because I ate something sweet

even though I promised myself not to have anything sweet and then I felt really horrible

Like I actually wanted to kms but I didn’t 🎀🤍

And now I’m starting off new;

so I didn’t eat breakfast today obviously

And for lunch I had baked potatoes which were sooo goddamn delicious honestly though

Im not sure if the potatoes were that delicious because I haven’t eaten since yesterday noon

or if they were just really that YUMMY who knows and then I also ate an apple because I was craving

Something sweet, but obviously, I am not going to eat sweets.

Also, I’m trying to lose asap so I have about two weeks to lose somewhere from 15kg to 25kg

20 kg would be perfect but is always better to loose more

In about 2weeks I wanna wear shorts and I wear crop tops cose it’s gonna be really hot

So I have to lose that weight rn also it would be really nice if y’all could send me mealspø

that would be really cool or just honestly DM me no matter what you have to say

like maybe you found some mealspø or maybe just some words to hype me up I would actually love that thx

🦋🫧☁️

New mealspō0 coming soon🤍☁️

[shahronak47]

Trip to New Zealand - South Island.

After some (?) complications we finally were excited to travel to New Zealand. Our flight was one-stop flight, so we went from KL to Sydney and then from  Sydney to Queenstown. Enjoyed interacting with Sydney immigration officer, loved their accent. Surprisingly, no-one asked for transit visa in AUS nor even NZ visa when entering their country. Maybe they already have it in their record against our passport details. The view in Sydney to Queenstown flight was amazing. The sight of Remarkables mountain is breath taking.

It was summer in NZ and the first day sun set around 9.30 pm. It was very bright till that time. We had already booked car from Yes rentals.  They came for pickup at the airport and take us to their showroom. Completed formalities and drove away the car. After reaching to our destination, we unloaded our luggage and went for some Grocery shopping. The place where we were staying was a secluded area but at the same time the view from the top was awesome. Once it went dark it was very cold at night. First day driving in NZ was challenging. Still trying to understand the roads signs and rules.

DAY 1

We woke up a bit late and mostly relaxed in the first half of the day. It was raining when we woke up and the rain continued till around 2 pm. We left the home when it was raining and roamed around in Queenstown street. It has good restaurants and places to eat. St. Omer Park was next to it. The park has nice view of Lake Wakatipu has a long trail for a walk. Ate an ice cream at Patagonia, it was very different and tasty.

Brought some groceries from an Indian grocery shop and back to home.

Day 2

This was a very pleasant morning as the sun was out since morning.

Today we had to reach Te Anau which was 170 km from Queenstown. The best thing with NZ is there are lot of spots on the way where you can stop and enjoy the nature. In fact, there are road signs indicating that such stops are coming up in 2 kms etc. In the morning we went to Queenstown garden,  had coffee and breakfast there and continued our journey to Te Anau. Queenstown garden is very big and we also saw rose garden. Thanks to awesome climate we could enjoy the stunning views that NZ had to offer today. Turns out Queenstown garden is at the same place where we were yesterday but it was just another end of St . Omer park. Everyone was sunbathing in the garden. Next we went to Kingston lake park which was a refresh stop and lot of caravans were parked here. Some of them from overnight stay. It had lake as well and this time we dared and stepped in the lake. The water was freezing cold. The sun was out since morning and it was around 3 pm now but the water was dangerously cold. Couldn't be in the water for more than 5 seconds. We had our lunch here under the shade of tree and took rest.  I also read couple of chapters of the book I was reading.

Finally, we left for Te Anau at 4 pm and drove for an hour and half to reach here. The place that we were staying in Te anau was a quite neighborhood but it was so beautiful. As soon as we reached our stay we took a cup of coffee and straight went out for a walk to explore the neighborhood. Everyone had their own simple home with garden of its own and it was very beautiful. I mean in our 30-40 mins of strolling outside we only saw one old lady who had came out for walk. Didn't saw any other human on the road there. It was very empty but we loved it.

Day 3

Milford sound is 120 kms from Te Anau. Lot of people drive directly from Queenstown to Milford sound and back on the same day. However, we didn't want to over exert ourselves so we took a stop at Te Anau. Te Anau is also last town before Milford Sound. We left at 10 am for Milford sound and on the way there are many photo stops and beautiful places. It was very difficult to resist and not stop for them. For many stops we said that we will wait here while coming back but few of them were too beautiful to resist. After couple of stops we did realize that we were getting late so decided to wait for them while coming back. The good thing about visiting NZ in summer is that there is visible sunlight till 9-9.30 pm so we do get good amount of time to be outside. Milford sound was a cruise ride to different waterfalls and mountain views.

It was very windy and the temperatures was very low. We went to the uppermost deck however, after 30 mins or so it became unbearably cold so we went down in the closed area of the ship. They serve coffee and some snacks on board which is paid of course. The tour lasts for 2 hours however, I was not too impressed by it. It costs us 145 NZD per person which also seemed super expensive. The only good part about going to Milford is as I mentioned all the scenic spots on the way where you can stop for toilet, relaxation and some photos.

Day 4

We left from Te anau and our next destination for night was Fairlie which was around 500km. This was going to be longest drive of our trip. As Queenstown was on the way we decided to have lunch there as we were aware about the restaurants there from day 1. Parking however can be a problem near Queenstown street. We took multiple breaks on the way. We had a booking at Tekapo springs near lake Tekapo. It had stargazing and hot pools experience combined. However, our booking was at 11.30pm.  Since in summer the sun sets late, only available slot were 10.30 and 11.30 pm. 10.30 pm was fully booked so we had to take 11.30pm slot even when we did the booking in advance. Star gazing was okayish , you could see lot of stars with naked eye itself. After the sun set, there were so many stars visible in the sky. Haven't seen sky so full of stars in a very long time. We expected a detailed view of some of stars through telescope in star gazing experience however, we were disappointed as the view was not as our expectation. The host was not very engaging as well as she only spoke about the things that she had memorized. Space is such an interesting topic , I tried to ask her one question but she did not answer it so I stopped those questions. We skipped hot springs as we were super tired by the drive and it was already 12.30 am. We were not willing to wait another hour and then drive back home at 1.30 am. Fairlie was around 50 km from lake Tekapo and it had become super chilly and windy at night when we were leaving. It was impossible to be outside. The drive was scary as well because it was pitch black and there were hardly any cars in the road at 1 o'clock. The only light that we could see was of our headlight. No lights in the front or back.

Day 5

It was super relaxed as we had came late at night from lake tekapo. We left home after lunch at 2 pm. Went to Good shepherd church as it is one of the places to visit when nearby.

Later, we went down straight to lake Tekapo to sit at the shore. Yesterday, although we were at the same place but couldn't spend time near the lake. A warning was issued that it is going to be windy today and so it was super windy wherever we went. We just had a nice cup of coffee there.

For later part of the evening we rested mostly. Watched a movie on Netflix while preparing dinner and eating it.

Day 6

Drove from Fairlie to Christchurch. Surprisingly, there was nothing much to do on the way unlike what we had experienced till now. The route not scenic as well. I think we are already spoiled by NZ in the first week itself expecting everything to be scenic all the time :P. After reaching Christchurch, we went to Hagley North park,  had lunch there on park bench. Checked in to our home,  had some rest and went for grocery shopping. We mostly prepared and ate our food at home itself, so grocery shopping was a big task wherever we went. First impression of Christchurch not too great. Too many traffic signals on the road, reminded me of Singapore where it was the same. Maybe it was because this was a big city. Saw some indiscipline on road for the first time in NZ from the locals. Otherwise till now, be it driving or pedestrians on the road everyone followed traffic rules. No place to park in the city. We went to new Regent Street where we had high expectations but it wasn't lively. Maybe we went at the wrong time of the day.

Day 7

When researching about things to do in Christchurch everyone suggested Tram and Punting on the Avon River. Both of the things we were not interested in. It didn't leave us with much options and we had 3 days here. Went to Quake city which is a museum about history of earthquakes in Christchurch. Christchurch is high earthquake prone zone and gets a lot of earthquakes. The one on 22 Feb 2011 was a major one where 175 people lost their lives. This museum shares the stories of the people , the people who experienced it first hand. It shares the science behind earthquakes and has some fun experiments related to it. Ticket was 20$ per person. After that, we visited Botanical garden and saw some wonderful flowers there.

Finally, at the end we went out to nearby beach. It was 15 kms from city center so close to Christchurch and there was literally no one on the beach. It was completely empty.  It was windy and we were surprised to know that no one was at this beautiful beach so close to the city. Anyway, that worked out good for us.

Day 8

We were going to spend one more day in Christchurch. First, we went for shopping in Central city area. Had food in Riverside Market. Then we spent some time playing with the birds in the Avon river and then went to 2$ thrift shop where there were things (mostly clothes ) starting from 2$. I bought myself couple of novels to read for 2$ each.

Day 9

Finally, left from Christchurch,  visited Racaia George. The water was beautiful and blue.

We loved our time there. This was one of the most recommended place but still it wasn't over crowded. I think there were around 20-25 people when we were there.

We spent rest of the evening at Fables which was a lovely place.

For the entire trip we had booked AirBnB's but this was only an exception. It was a lovely hotel with a very big landscape. It was very huge and view from the room was very beautiful.

After dinner we sat outside drinking coffee at the sunset and playing nice romantic music in the background.

Day 10

We did breakfast at the hotel and left for Hoktika. It was very windy today since morning. Hoktika was 250 kms from the hotel and the road was challenging. Steep ghats and turns along with wind and rain made the journey even more challenging. It rained the whole day without a break. Apparently,  it was a wet day is what our host said after reaching their place.

Day 11

We didn't do much yesterday after reaching hoktika since it was raining the entire evening. In the morning we checked out and went to nearby Grocery store to buy some essentials. After that we went to Hoktika beach where the waves were very strong. Maybe it was because of the wind or geography of Hokitika.

After strolling there for a bit we went to nearby cafe which was surprisingly very full. Had some sandwiches and coffee there. Roamed around the street, visited few shops and bought some clothes as they were on discount. In the afternoon we left for Fox Glacier and did wait for couple of stops on the way.

Day 12

Our main activity for the day in Fox Glacier got postponed. We had booked snow landing in glacier with helicopter ride. However, there was a very high cloud cover today affecting the visibility so it was not possible to do this today. We had one more day in Fox glacier so we were going to try again tomorrow. Later we went to lake Matheson which had a beautiful reflection point.

It was an easy walk and had different points to visit. Later on, we strolled near the town Centre.

Day 13

The day started with another bad news that the weather is not clear today as well and there are lot of cloud cover near the landing area. This was strange since it was sunny today and the climate was much better than yesterday. The good thing about this glacier landing we were going to get refund if the flight was cancelled. We saw few other companies still taking people on rides, it was only our operator who said that it was cancelled. We enquired at them and they had one flight available. It was expensive 330$ per person. The one that we had booked was for 250$ doing the same thing. After thinking for a while we decided to book it. They took us to a helipad nearby which was a 5 mins drive and then the helicopter flight was around 10 mins. The glacier was a very close spot. They land on the glacier and we spend around 10 mins there for photos. As it was sunny today, the snow was reflecting very brightly.

The pilot mentioned that it is 14km glacier which is present all the year around. Lucky for us we were also sitting in the front along with the pilot. In one helicopter ride there are 6 people, 2 in the front and 4 at the back. 330 seems expensive for the short 30 mins flight but it is the tourist season now, so no regrets. After that we were driving to Wanaka today. It was 280 kms drive and we had nice stops this time on the way. We reached Wanaka at around 5.30 pm after taking 4-5 stops.

Went out for lunner (lunch/dinner) and came back to home. We were very tired from the ride and slept very early today.

Day 14

Left home after breakfast and went to lavender farm. Beautiful flowers and landscape. However,  entry there is not free. It costs 15$ per person. Spent the afternoon there, clicked some nice pictures , came home and did lunch.

Went out for some shopping in town centre and visited wanaka lake which is in town center as well. Roamed around the shops there. Had dinner at a nice restaurant and came back to home.

Day 15.

Today we had to drive from Wanaka to Queenstown. After checkout we want to #thatWanakaTree and had nice breakfast at Dougbin bakery before leaving for Queenstown.

It was a nice 70 kms drive which we completed in little more than hour. This was the last place of our stay. My wife was not feeling well so we mostly stayed in the apartment for today.

Day 16

Today the only thing to do in our agenda was shopping. We had to buy Souvenir for friends and family back home.

Day 17

After checkout out had some time so went out to have ice cream at patagonia and gave back the car at Yes rentals and they dropped us to the airport. However, it did not end there :(

Looking back at the entire here are some reflection points.

Things we did well -

1. Self managed everything. I was a bit skeptical about this but it was the best decision. We could tailor made itinerary for us. We had enquired with some tour organizers however, we decided to do it on our own. Yes, it was not 100% successful but still the houses we stayed in, routes we followed were specially made for us keeping our likes and dislikes in mind by us. 2. Self drive. Before coming to NZ, I must have drove car for around 200 kms, my lifetime total. Whereas in NZ, I drove for 2300 kms here but the kind of flexibility it provided was amazing. Couldn't imagine doing this via tour or a dedicated driver as well. Btw, having a dedicated driver is twice as expensive. 3. Travelling in February instead of August. Previously, we were planning to travel to NZ in August for my wife's birthday. However, it is winter during that time and things are unreliable. Roads are closed due to snow, weather changes frequently. You need to check the road condition before leaving for every trip. Additionally, the days are shorter where sun sets much earlier.

Things we'll do differently next time -

1. Reduce duration of trip. There were days when we were bored and didn't have much to do. NZ is very expensive as well, so everyday you stay adds an additional expense to your pocket. 2. Include insect repellent. It is nice to visit in summer in nature but while being in nature also brings lots of insects that bite. It would be much better if you have an insect repellent with you. 3. Don't include overnight activities especially when we have full day travel. The stargazing experience in lake tekapo taught us that.

Few things that are special to NZ - 1. Except within the city in Christchurch and some parts of Queenstown everything in NZ is a single lane road. More than 90% of road that we drove on was single lane. 2. NZ is home to all modes of transportation. Hiking,  walking,  cycling,  biking, car driving,  RV's and campervans. 3. Very common to see people jog at any time of the day. 7 am, 2 pm, 12 pm. Seen people jogging/running at any time. 4. Made in NZ products mostly throughout the country. Be it shampoo, detergent, ketchup, spices most of the ones that we picked up from grocery was made in NZ. 5. Abundant parking wherever we went. Abundant seating places. There was never an issue for them. I think less population in NZ makes it possible to do it. 6. 10 am check out everywhere in NZ. 10 am seems too early but I guess this is the standard they have. Although, check-out is early but check in is still at normal time i.e 2pm or 3pm. 7. Viewpoints at every highway. I have mentioned this multiple times but if you are travelling from point A to point B, there are going to be multiple stops on the way for you to appreciate the beauty of NZ. 8. Every town/village has town center which is a central place where you can find everything.

I hope you enjoyed this trip to NZ with us. Here are some final few photos from NZ.

[vitamingummybear]

fuck fuck fuck fuck no way i didn't just ate 690cal for breakfast damnnn how did that happen. if i'm fat it is literally because my mom makes me eat so much shit. that's why i have a breakfast apart from what my family eats. cause no no no. fuck ugh no goddamnit no i want to cry. i still have to go out tonight for my cousins birthday party, and now i cant fucking drink, because i ate too much. i literally can't have more than 300cal for lunch or i'll kms fuck noooOOOO. and what if they want to have tacos after that? hell no ugh

[mwagneto]

.

[whyse7vn]

BTS BOYFRIEND TEXTS -

[ ot7 x reader ]

lmao what is this it’s 3 am and i’m tired enjoy ^ ^

SEOKJIN -

jin: you ate without me…

y/n: did do that

jin: you said you’d wait

y/n: lied

jin: you’re not even gonna try and lie and say you tried you wait or something?

y/n: no

jin: we’re over

y/n: damn that sucks

jin: you don’t even care 😓

y/n: i do

seokjin please please please take me back i love you so much please please !!

jin: i guess i’ll give you another chance 🙄

y/n: thanks so much jinjin love you 😍😍🥰🥰🥰‼️‼️‼️‼️💕💕💓💓💓

jin: ew stop

y/n: stop what bae 😓💓

jin: that

y/n: you’re so hard to please

jin: i deserve better than you

y/n: choke

jin: i’m plotting your murder

y/n: it’s giving jin !alpha !hybrid !mafia boss !hard dom (disturbing content) minors dni

jin: i wolf you

y/n: would turn you into a rug

NAMJOON -

namjoon: got a loaf of bread

y/n: smooth like butter

namjoon: also got broke that green bowl so i bought a new one

y/n: haters gonna hate and players gonna play

namjoon: the bowl is blue tho

hope that’s ok

y/n: pretty woman

namjoon: did you eat lunch ?

y/n: everybody say no

namjoon: you should go do that then

y/n: run run run

namjoon: i think there is soup in the fridge

go check

y/n: did you see my bag ?

namjoon: is it there ?

y/n: you’re so big for no reason

namjoon: what ?

y/n: i’m looking at that photo on the fridge

namjoon: the disney one ?

y/n: yeah and you’re standing behind me you a big bitch

namjoon: thanks ?

y/n: ur built like a brick

ur so hot

lord

come home pls

namjoon: i’m on my way love

y/n: DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN THAT INTERVIEWER TOLD YOO TO PLAY UR OWN RACE LMAOOOOO

namjoon: i do

y/n: he really got you like that

foul

i would of laughed if i was there

namjoon: i know

y/n: loud asf too

namjoon: i know babe

y/n: pls he really ate you up

lord i’m laughing now

namjoon: i figured

y/n: still love you tho 🤞🏽❤️

namjoon: love you too

was the soup in the fridge ?

y/n: no

namjoon: k i’ll order something when i get back ok ?

y/n: light it up like dynamite

YOONGI -

y/n: what if i had 1 hour to live and was going bald and my leg was broken and all my family was dying from cancer right now

yoongi: it’s 8am

y/n: what if

yoongi: it’s 8am

y/n: yoongi 🥺

yoongi: it is 8 am.

y/n: ok and i am gonna kms.

what now yoongi ? what now ??

yoongi: bye

y/n: what the frick bro

fuck you

you’re an opp fr

can’t trust anyone

not a soul not even your own bf

this is so sad

all they ever do is leave you in the dirt

this is what fame does to people

man this is so sad

all this money gets to them fr fr

i can’t believe it

you switched like a pussy lil bitch 💔🗣🙏🏽

agust d too famous for me 😓���

omg am i the next rap monster but actually black ????

you should get them braids again bae 😍

could be twins

nvm i don’t like you forgot

suga flopped 🥱‼️

bts disband

skz outsold bts 🗣🗣🗣🗣

felix should replace suga 💯

agust d a flop 🙄

cyphers ain’t even that good

suga old asf

yoongi: i am trying

y/n: omg hey bae 😍😍❤️🥵🥰

yoongi: to sleep

y/n: without me 😩⁉️

yoongi: yes

y/n: omw to america rn btw like fr fr no joke /thisisnotajokeimbeingfr

yoongi: i know

y/n: i can tell you’re so excited ur so cute love you 💞

yoongi: yeah.

going to sleep now.

y/n: rest up bro ‼️‼️‼️

see you soon g 🥱🤞🏽

HOSEOK -

y/n: i had a dream you violently slammed me into a pile of bricks

you had me by the throat

hobi: my fault

y/n: my back is broken now

hobi: sorry

y/n: it’s ok i forgive you

hobi: thank you

y/n: just don’t do it again

hobi: i promise i won’t

y/n: don’t let me down

hobi: ok

y/n: we are in love

hobi: true

y/n: cool

hobi: went into a cake shop today

y/n: what did it smell like

hobi: roses

y/n: interesting

hobi: got a small cake with a strawberry on top

y/n: photo ?

hobi: i dropped it

y/n: oh

hobi: i took a picture of it on the floor tho do you want to see ?

y/n: please

TAEHYUNG -

tae: hiiii

y/n: saw a trumpet on the tv made me think about how shit you sound playing it

tae: fuck you i’ll be great one day

y/n: i take it back ur hot

tae: fanks

y/n: we can get matching trumpets

can we put like sequins on them or will that fuck up the sound or something?

tae: idk

y/n: you should

tae: can we drink tn?

y/n: we can make a lil marching band 🥺🥺🥺

tae: also can we not invite jin this time want it to just be us

y/n: we should learn how to play dynamite

tae: and we are gonna eat yesterday’s leftovers

y/n: but if i see your fucking feet out one time today marching band dreams will come to an end ok ?

tae: but idk if i’m really feeling leftovers yk???

y/n: make sure them dogs are LOCKED away

tae: yeah idk i’ll wait until it’s time to eat then i’ll decide

y/n: what ?

tae: huh?

why are you talking about my feet

y/n: they’re scary 😟

tae: i feel like we’re on the completely different pages rn

JUNGKOOK -

jk: what if i was spiderman ?

y/n: that would be hot

jk: yeah

y/n: why aren’t you spiderman?

jk: racism.

y/n: valid

jk: do you still think i’m hot even tho i’m not spiderman?

y/n: i guess

jk: thanks

y/n: yw

jk: sorry i’m not at my full potential

y/n: i forgive you

jk: ok

y/n: ok

jk: bought a rock today

y/n: a shiny one ?

jk: no

y/n: like just a normal one ?

jk: yeah

y/n: nice.

jk: ikr

y/n: how much was it?

jk: 4k

y/n: what

jk: 4,000

y/n: jungkook

jk: yeah

y/n: what the fuck

jk: the rock seller was very convincing

y/n: can you return it ?

jk: no

y/n: what does the rock do

jk: sit ?

y/n: oh

jk: i’m gonna draw a face on it

y/n: i think i’m gonna take your card for a bit

jk: oh

y/n: yeah

jk: did i do something wrong ?

JIMIN -

jimin: watched 10 fancams of myself today

y/n: watched 10 of v

jimin: go fuck him then ???

y/n: might do that

jimin: no don’t it was a joke /j /j /j /j

y/n: don’t joke like that got my hopes up for nothing 😔💔

jimin: you would never

y/n: try me

jimin: you make me sick

y/n: 🤞🏽🤞🏽

jimin: you make me hard

y/n: i would hope so

jimin: yeah

y/n: yeah

jimin: i’m in our room

y/n: ok

jimin: just thinking

y/n: nice to know your brain still does that

jimin: you ruined it

y/n: my bad bro 🙏🏽

jimin: bro ???

y/n: bestie ?

jimin: ur so annoying

y/n: i’ll try better myself for you jimin 😔

jimin: you cant

you’re too lost

y/n: find me jimin 🥺🥺

pls find me 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

jimin: i’ll try

y/n: that’s so hot 🤤🥵❤️‼️💯

[mymoon125]

what I ate today(triying to eat less again but failed)

breakfast: /

lunch: some kind of salad and something my parents made, I didnt eat much of it and it was pretty healthy so I hope it was only around 400kcals

random stuff I ate: apple pie, 2 cinnamon buns, one cookie, and a lot of dough from making the cinnamon buns bro thats so bad gonna kms definitely over 1500kcals help

my current weight is 58.9 but I still feel like I gained over the last weeks... I hate my relationship with food so much because literally 3 weeks ago I was exercising because I tought 800kcals a day was too much then last week I tought I am recovering again, 2 days ago I purged and now I binged without even have satrved. but the ana thoughts are ALWAYS there no matter on wich stage of those I am. I am literally the worst an0rex!c ever

gonna exercise now tho, I want to burn at least a few of those calories, dont want to wake up at 59 something tomorrow