#at least i got it out of my system right?

[joemomrgneissguy]

via @iamthepulta

When I was around 13 or so, I got introduced to a friend to Christianity after being brought up in a mostly atheistic household. My parents had also just gotten divorced and my Dad had coincidentally decided that then was as good a time as any to start going to church again, and so would start taking us because we seemed interested in it.

As a pretty lonely kid with a big desire to fit in or have community, it was a formative time in my life, and I took to it quite quickly.

But the thing about a lot of evangelical spaces is, there is no room for nuance, and, perhaps more crucially, having doubts is seen as a crisis. If you are saved by faith alone, the thinking seemed to be that faith must be total and absolute.

For teenaged me, that meant not questioning things too much, at least not openly, and just accepting what was said at face value like anything I had learned in school up to that point. There were limits to this, like when my church brought in a guest speaker that claimed evolution wasn't real and that the dinosaurs had survived Noah's flood, but on the whole, I didn't have enough of a basis to dispute anything I was told.

Enter 'Mark'. Mark went to the same middle school as me and the same highschool I attended freshman year, and he was a really annoying and combative atheist. At some point he clocked that I was Christian, and he started arguing with me all the time. Most of it wasn't all that substantive. We were young teenagers, after all. But it often got heated, because how dare he question this stuff that is obvious truth?

I realize now that me getting into arguments with him so much was based out of a certain emotional immaturity, and a desire to justify to him and myself that I was right in making a decision that I myself was unsure of. It was performative, to an extent, so I didn't actually hate the guy when everything was said and done.

That beef died down after a year or so. The arguments were getting nowhere, and Mark turned out to be a pretty good guy with perhaps a bit of an antisocial streak. We started hanging out a bit more, and talking about things other than religion, and were eventually at least nominally friends.

This same thing played out with a friend that was Jewish, and another that was Mormon. This was all around that same time in my life. We bickered over things for a while, and then eventually religion just wasn't a factor in our relationship.

These pointless arguments made me realize the simple idea that arguing over religion, trying to convert people to your side, is ultimately a pointless endeavor because it is unprovable, and that I could just as easily be "wrong" with my beliefs. They had just as much 'evidence' as I did. So no matter how hard I 'believed' in this stuff, I just had to accept that some other people never would, and that's okay.

That is somewhat heretical in an evangelical context, since the whole idea is to evangelize, but it opened me up to there being space for other religions and belief systems in the world, and that they were comprised of good people who deserved nothing but love and respect.

This seed of openness and maturity was ultimately what allowed me to change when I moved for college, where I was exposed to stuff like the actual science behind evolution, friends who were LGBT, and programs challenging ideas of creationism.

I owe my life now to those conversations. My career, my friends, my outlook on life could have never occurred without them.

And it's why I now could never return to the same spaces I grew up with, because I can now see them for the toxic, hateful places they are.

I don't know how to navigate faith these days, but I am eternally grateful to "annoying" atheists in my life, and for the patience people had when I was still figuring myself out.

We need the obnoxious atheists back. I know they engineered their own destruction by being annoying and pretentious, but it has become apparent how essential to the ecosystem they were. The religious fanatics have become too bold without their natural predators. Jesus wojaks would have been torn to shreds in 2011.

[grandline-fics]

For Valentine's event! I'm so deeply in love how you write, especially Doflamingo!! So maybe, True love's kiss for him?

Anyway thanks for your works they're all amazing 🙌💕

DESCRIPTION: True Love's Kiss- The moment they realise they're in love

WARNINGS: none (at least I don't think so, other than the fact is about Doflamingo)

CHARACTERS: Doflamingo

WORDS: 1,420

A/N: At first I was tempted to link this to Immune To Your Charms but then decided against it so we could have a different version of Doffy and another version of his realisation he's capable of love. I hope you enjoy what I came up with for this for you anon. Thank you for the request!

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

DIRECTORY | PROMPT LIST | KO-FI | VALENTINES EVENT MASTERLIST

———————

Doflamingo thrived on the adoration and unequivocal loyalty of his family, his most trusted elite officers in the inner circle ready to throw their lives down should he simply say the word. The rush that would flood his system when his subordinates and civilians bowed low before him took him flooding back to his short lived days in his rightful standing as a Celestial Dragon; it’s never quite the same that his nostalgia had preserved in his memory but it's as close as it’ll ever get. The only other thing that ever came close to giving him a surge of true satisfaction and happiness is when you, one of his best and most precious officers, would throw him that sweet smile contrasting with that sharp and dangerous gaze of yours and greet him with a smooth “Hello Doffy.” 

He could always count on you to see to it that any mission he gave you was executed perfectly and without hesitation. Not only did you take pride in your efficiency and skill but seeing it recognised in a man like Doflamingo mattered to you too. You knew that Doflamingo’s trust and reliance on you had nothing to do with the fact that you were Doflamingo’s current lover. As it was, you understood your place in the whole situation, just as you’d witnessed with his previous entanglements.

It was only ever going to last as long as your King wished it to. Should anyone else ever catch his eye and attention and he wished them to warm his bed instead of you, you would be cast aside in that regard. You came to terms with that long ago and idly part of your mind always wondered when that day would come so you enjoyed what you had for as long as Doflamingo wanted you that way.

One morning you were summoned to his office for your latest mission. Wordlessly you accepted the information he handed over to you and began to read it over while listening to his every word. “Seems someone’s been pushing their nose into places that doesn’t concern them. That’s the most recent location we could learn so it’s likely they’ve moved on already.” He explained, his sinister grin in place. “I know it’ll be no issue for you to track them down and taking care of them before returning home to me.”

“Sure you don't want me to take my time?” You asked curiously, finally lifting your head with your own smile curving your lips. “You normally enjoy it when I make them suffer first.”

“You’ll already be spending time away in search of your prey, my dear.” Doflamingo explained while rising from his seat to step around the desk to stand in front of you. Never needing his strings to make you move or respond in the ways he wished, you simply always knew. Keeping your eyes on his face, you turned to face him, stepping back until the desk was now behind you and his hands settled on the wood to playfully cage you in. “I’d much rather have you go and kill and come back, otherwise I’d just miss you too much.”

For the smallest moment his words threw you off but you quickly controlled your expression. Unfortunately you weren’t fast enough and it hadn’t gone unnoticed to Doflamingo. Lifting one hand away to pinch your chin he made you look firmly at him, refusing to let you go until he got answers out of you. Doflamingo knew you wouldn’t have to force it out of you. The second he asked, you’d answer. “Now what was that look for? What could I have said to possibly create such a face?”

“Just surprised my absence would have such an affect on you.” You explained calmly, your smile returning. “There’s plenty here that’ll keep you company if I take too long. Speaking of, with your permission, I’ll go straight away Doffy.” Doflamingo regarded you silently and moved his hand from your chin to thread his fingers into your hair and pulled you in as he leant forward to capture you lips in a harsh, bruising kiss. Under his lead, you effortlessly followed the pace and intensity of the kiss, only breaking apart when he allowed it to. Breathless and dazed you could only stare at Doflamingo when he released you, offering a small but determined nod when he ordered you to complete your mission as fast as you could.

——

Two weeks went by and still you hadn’t returned, leaving Doflamingo to feel restless. Uncomfortably so. He had been receiving updates from you steadily up until a few days ago, everything in code and brief but you hadn’t given him any signal that something was wrong. You were closely on the heels of your target who you were certain you’d catch up to soon. Doflamingo had no doubts about your abilities, you were one of his best so he knew you’d get the job done but still something was annoying him about it all. He was also unshakable in his knowledge of your loyalty to him, there was no way you’d leave him but he still needed to know what was causing his agitation. Thinking back to the day you left he remembered the look of genuine surprise that captured your usually self-assured features when he spoke of how he’d miss you. 

Your little comment about others keeping him company also hadn’t gone unnoticed by him either. Truth be told now that he had the time to think about, you had lasted so much longer than anyone else had as his lover. Those that came before you held no true interest with him, simply attractive things that allowed him to satisfy his needs before he kicked them out of his bed and sought his next source of entertainment in another person. You held his every attention, staying close to him even without having to give your body or touch to him. It was you he wanted and he had meant what he’d said when he said he missed you when you were gone, only now he seemed to realise just how much. 

Two more days passed before you returned to Dressrosa’s Palace, walking slowly and tensed. At your arrival in the entrance hall, you saw a few servants hurrying in different directions most likely in search of Doflamingo to let him know. You didn’t know why they bothered, he was going to be the first person you sought out to report the success of your mission and apologise for taking longer than you should have. You were only halfway up the staircase when Doflamingo appeared at the top, watching you climb the last few steps until you were beside him. 

Carefully he inspected your face. You looked exhausted, dark circles under your eyes and your shoulders slumped slightly. You were barely staying awake, he could see the steeled focus in your gaze as you were determined to remain conscious enough to greet him with an attempt at your usual sweet smile. “Hello Doffy. Sorry I took longer than intended.”

“Was the mission successful?”

“Mhm.” You nodded before covering you mouth to yawn. “Target was a nuisance though.”

“In what way?” Doflamingo lifted you effortlessly into his arms and carried you to his quarters.

“Devil Fruit user.” You explained with a mumble, a small hum of contentment breaking from your lips when you were laid down on his bed, sinking against the pillows. Doflamingo tilted his head curiously at that revelation. Had he known that the target had an ability, he would have ensured you were better prepared for that. Doflamingo felt relief wash over him to see you’d been unharmed, knowing better than anyone how monstrous Devil Fruits were, and made sure that in future you would be better prepared so there would be no surprises like that on your missions. “Doffy? Why am I in your room?”

“I had your things moved here while you were away, of course.” He chuckled watching you struggle to open your eyes to look at him in confusion. “It seemed as though you had a lapse in awareness about your standing with me. Your place is beside me always and there will never be any room for anyone else. Understand, love?” For emphasis he pressed a tender kiss against your lips.

“I understand.” You hummed softly, the loving smile gracing your lips suddenly securing itself in Doflamingo’s regard as something no-one else could ever come close to competing with.

——————————————-

TAG LIST (If I’ve missed anyone or if you want to be added just let me know) @3v37773, @tsaaps , @i-am-all-love-puns-and-lazy , @fiery-captain-spider-santa, @kabloswrld , @atanukileaf , @ane5e , @stuckinthewrongworld , @deathsmajestysworld , @cloudysunset04 , @chillerkiller , @extremely-ashtridic , @decayingpizza , @liesatemyocean , @ace-for-ace , @nerium-lil , @destynelseclipsa , @dreamcastgirl99 , @my-name-is-heartache , @iamn1ya ,  @yunho-leeknow , @hinata7346 , @h0oouwlss , @missrandomdreamer , @sleepykittycx , @ddawn111 , @jaygrl22 , @sylum , @acehyacinth , @resident-cryptid , @treelogirl , @maellem , @thulhu , @appalost , @dindjarins1ut , @irumawife , @laidenbreecatchall , @redwolfxx , @jevoislesbrasdemer , @schanwow , @pao198391 , @glitchtricks94 , @nina-ya , @48daisies , @sagyunaro , @artemis162534 , @rosemary-lungs , @thecraftywriter , @rorozorolover , @yagirlsmuchelle , @engenemoazen , @sukunasstomachtongue , @nico-ith

[icouldntthinkofabetternamesook]

my brain made so connections

I'm not sure how pictures work here so this is gonna be formatted goofy but these two polycules/love angles have far to much in common and I need to share

Mel Medarda and Hazel Levesque

beautiful terrifying black women with mommy issues, gold, an association with wealth, prodigious magic powers, artistic pursuits and a distant brother. in a position of power in a system that will always see them as outsiders to some extent. big kindhearted boyfriend. terrible relationship with mother who is in many ways the antagonist of the entire piece and they never get a satisfying conclusion to their relationship(I see Gaea as Hazel's mom in this comparison). deeply and seriously underserved by a narrative that treats getting magic powers as the same thing as getting character development. I once again cannot overstate the shared connection to gold and wealth, especially gold. in many ways responsible for the events of the series but she did it for her mother's love so I can't blame her. Mels love of painting and Hazels love of drawing. A deep, loving, if damaged heart. if they came from anywhere near the same social strata they would be the same character

these two characters are defiantly cross universe variants of each other and their massive similarities kicked off this entire thought process

Viktor and Leo Valdez

scrappy, messy inventors with low self esteem, resurrections, a weird thing going on with a magical entity, and they both die to save the world. in weird sorta love triangle with the above. Leo has that pre arcane Machine herald vibe. they both push people away and are in a self inflicted cycle of loneliness despite being full of love. died for your sins and only got hate and pain in response

Jayce Tales and Frank Zhang

probably the least similar of the polycules. absolute puppies of men, tendencies to fail upwards, get put at the very top of a system of authority of a kinda fascist organization, magic totem of some form, come from some level of legacy in their systems though Frank has far more. most importantly in a weird polycule, love angle with the other two, officially dating the golden girl and has weird thing happening with the resurrected one.

these are both utterly delightful polycules were the boys should go make out so the girl can self actualize

a few more arcane riordan parallels under the cut with more thematic exploration

Caitlyn Kiramman and Reyna Ramirez-Arellano

queer woman of color who got pulled into the facism despite their good intentions

Vi and Piper McClean

a bit of a stretch, but messy haired lesbians in conflict with a lot of the existing order and pressure of family legacy. I kinda have it divided with Piltover=Rome, Zaun=greece. which leads me to another connection. their both very close to the next person on my list

Jinx and Annabeth Chase

now this is definitely a hear me out, but I love my girl geniuses who after a falling out with their family ran into an older male figure who loved them like family but nonetheless was horribly toxic and wound up falling into even through their genuine dedication to their righteous crusade being soured after a falling out with another figure who also acted in a similar capacity to the girl they took in and the story ends with the little girl standing over their corpse they are various levels of responsible for after choose their devotion to another over their toxic semi parental love who spends their last breaths reaffirming their relationship and ultimately winning a more centrist version of their cause after death. I just love when little girls wind up alone, and desperate to prove themselves because the system cares about them as weapons over children to be protected.

Silco and Luke Castellan

was right. bitchin scars. fallen hero figures who care deeply for the people they sent out to protect but ultimately became what they feared most and got corrupted by power. leftist hero's in a centrist narrative. this does not change the immense harm they did specifically to the young girl in their care they have weird semi sexual/romantic subtext with despite ultimately having a familial bond. they also have an antagonist relationship with

Ekko and Percy Jackson

the boy savior, far to much on their shoulders to early, leaders in their community, truly look out for the people, will spit in authorities eye but is also pretty close to some specific people in power, in love with the victim/adopted family of the villain/fallen hero. the one who breaks the cycle and saves the day

I managed to get most of the Arcane characters and the tip of the ice berg for riordan. this obviously has Thalia as Vander in the Luke/Silco, Annabeth/Jinx trio, as well as an association with wolves and dying in a heroic sacrifice to protect a little girl in their charge and ultimately coming back from the dead after being saved against their will. I think Vi might actually be the closest to Jason in this dynamic, especially after making Reyna/Caitlyn, but they don't have that much more in common. serious complexes about being what others need and a lack of internal stability? amnesia if you take vi's old league lore into account? I still prefer Piper I think they have more similar vibes and I'm trying to make the camps and city's line up

this also has Gaea as Ambessa and Calypso as Hexcore Sky. no one really lines up with singed or Sevika and no one lines up with Nico. Sevika works as Clarisse, as in utterly amazing butches

this might all just be similar tropes lining up in similar ways but I kinda like it

[cleolinda]

Weekend links, March 2, 2025

Silent Hill 2 update: If you sneak over to my Patreon, you can watch the first commentary video already (I'll be replacing it with an updated version). I’m still working on the timestamp writeup (links, sources, etc.) and, uh, that updated version with some corrections at the end. I’ve also been formatting the writeup for Tumblr and, uhhh.... it’s like four posts. It’s honestly just embarrassing. But I know what the carving on the church door you might not even notice says, I know why all the oscillating fans are turquoise blue, I’ve found a thematically relevant Goya painting hidden in a shop you don’t even have to enter, and now we all have to suffer for it. 

The second video’s been recorded but isn’t uploaded anywhere, and I’ve finished taking notes for the writeup. I’m taking so long that I might honestly just clip out a few excerpts and put them on my YouTube channel (I have a YouTube channel) (in theory).

(Yes, watching other people play video games IS a valid way to enjoy them, and it’s how I got into playing in the first place.)

Meanwhile: I just wanted to address the idea that medication obscures your real personality, and I ended up writing a memoir.

Reblogs of interest

It was a bad week for celebrity deaths: Roberta Flack ("Killing Me Softly"), after two years diagnosed with ALS; Michelle Trachtenberg (Buffy, Gossip Girl), after a prior liver transplant; and then, under circumstances that still haven’t been explained, Gene Hackman and his wife Betsy Arakawa.

Now, it’s important to know about the political protests happening in the U.S. (and I hope people run HARD with “Impeach President Musk” for maximum in-fighting), but it was “Vermont insults” that gave me the most joy.

"NASA released the clearest pictures yet of our neighbours in the solar system"

What Queen Nefertiti may have looked like in real life, improved

Microsoft is shutting down Skype

Joann Fabrics is going out of business (+ online alternatives)

“YOU FREAKS CRASHED THE DASHCON SITE AND THEN SOLD OUT THE TICKETS IN UNDER 30 MINUTES” (“I need you all to understand this is a post from February 22, 2025”)

“Help your local library; get books out even if you know you can’t read them all!”

Ursula K. LeGuin: “As you read a book word by word and page by page, you participate in its creation”

This full-series retrospective of Animorphs, however brief, is so unhinged that I went and legally downloaded the entire set of books. 

“Good night to only the team names at the Seattle women’s hockey club” (personal favorite: Rink Pony Club)

Sometimes I wonder what the Victorians would think of “naked” dresses. Anyway, I really like Elie Saab

All they know is charleston, shake cocktail, eat hot chip & lie

“stop what you’re doing right now and look at archaic period terracotta fox scratching its head”

“The bath house duck spirits from Spirited Away, taking a dip in this lava lamp”

Tumblr: Where “Pelican Childcare” is inherently funny

Crow Time: Business bird

Gorgeous Dominique Ramsey art with a Langston Hughes quote

Grocery cats (“but then you scroll down and it’s like oh, there’s a team of cats ringing up that lady’s tea and jam”)

Look this bunny in the eyes and you will understand why I tagged this “become ungovernable”

“where is that cat with the kind and reassuring face”

Paint me like one of your French bears

Hi. 1 quastion

Video

LOTR film fandom has been going strong for 20+ years and we’re not gonna stop now (re: Pippin’s song in Return of the King)

Zelenogorsk is sand bathing

The sacred texts

Periodic reblog: this massive catalogue of parody lyric tweets

“The neurodivergent urge to do this,” or: the origin of a very popular reaction pic

Personal tags of the week

Wet Beast Wednesday is worth a look, plus the newest Beneficent Chain Post (happiness will come to you. “When You Least Expect It. Probably Late March”).

[playstation-dreamcast]

I've seen yalls requests and I'm working on them but oh man I gotta get this out of my mind.

Chris's need for control absolutely started incredibly young.

Okay follow me here: I know the popular headcanon is that Chris took care of Claire in a very literal sense, posing as a legal guardian from an incredibly young age... but like, that's just not the case.

Legally speaking you have to be at least 16 to be legally emancipated. This includes from the foster care system. Meaning Claire would have been around 12 years old at the earliest that Chris could have gotten out of the system.

But heres the thing: in most states, you can not legally adopt a child until you're 18. Meaning Chris could have maybe taken legal custody of Claire when he was 18 and she was 14. I think Chris probably immediately went into the military to try and get out of pvoerty/build a better life for Claire, but that's a post for another day.

That means they spent their entire lives at the will of a system that didn't give a fuck about them

It didn't give a fuck if they were placed in a safe home.

It didn't give a fuck if they were separated.

It didn't give a fuck about what they wanted. And Chris was powerless to do anything about it. Especially as an older sibling, it's hard to find placements for older kids- even harder to find placements with room for two kids.

I wonder how often they we're separated, left to the whims of whatever foster guardians they had getting a long so they could see each other. Siblings don't get visitation rights you know.

And like, I fully believe Chris stepped up to get his sister out of the system as soon as he most possibly could- but he spent his entire adolences there. Learning that his will, and his wants and needs do not matter. He had to internalize that right?

I wonder if that's why he had such a hero complex even before Racoon City

It explains to me why they made sure they kept such close contact once they could. And why Claire probably freaked out so hard when he vanished

But that's probably why Chris feels the need to be so in control now as an adult, even before Racoon City (see: how bitchy he gets with Jill when he's in the cage and he has to trust her to get him out.) Because as a child he had zero control of his life and it probably led to a lot of hurt.

You think him and Wesker ever bonded over their time as orphans? Do you think that shared string of trauma was the first thread that bound them together? I wonder if Wesker ever used it against him, softly nudging at his sore spot to manipulate Chris into doing what Wesker wanted him to do

I just got home from an overnight shift at work, so this is probably pretty incoherent and all over the place. You're welcome 💙💙

(Oh, and btw: I stand by that Chris was a running back in high school. I just think he had to drop after his freshman year and get a job. I believe this because God damn it I need him to have ONE good thing man)

[electricpants57]

rambles #1

i love my friends, and i'm grateful that i have them, but sometimes i wonder "why do i feel so lonely?

i have so many friends

so why do i feel like i have none?"

and sometimes i wonder if maybe my loneliness is required so that i know my place, so that i don't get ahead of myself and let things get to my head

but sometimes when i'm out with my family and i see kids my age talking i just wonder why, despite the amount of connections i have, do i feel so alone

i'm not blaming my friends at all, i care about them more than i care about myself, but sometimes i feel like someone convenient to talk to. a placeholder for when their real friends arrive.

maybe i just crave a real human connection, cause an "i love you" is nothing compared to being able to talk without it being one-sided or talking knowing the person you're talking to won't respond

i don't believe in fate. but maybe this is an exception, maybe i'm just supposed to be alone

[benevolenterrancy]

~ Extremely Unwilling Magical Protagonists Attempt To Outrun The Plot And Not Fucking Die ~

(@takofukkatsumi this tag is from a while ago but it hasn't left my brain -- L-Space got very weird all of a sudden)

[alongtidesoflight]

i swear my stepdad is so illogical AND stubborn it hurts

[kirby-the-gorb]

[sysig]

Let him dad her!! (Patreon)

[redrook]

since I somehow need to lay this out plainly,

I was in high school working full time so I could have regular meals, and the grocery store I worked at decided to regularly handcuff me inside a steel cart for at least one shift a week for well over a year. Customers were otherwise so terrible that employees would rather be literally handcuffed in the cage than deal with then. I regularly got creepy comments from older men, because I was a big-chested teenaged girl handcuffed inside a cage. And I did not complain, because I did not want a customer to complain about me, and I got to sit down, and the treatment was still preferable to regular customer service and having to fake a polite smile for 8 hours.

my point in making the grocery jail post was that there would be people that expressed horror, dismay, etc. at my situation, but never actually challenged it in a way that would have stopped it. it was an exploitative system dependent on placid outrage.

you can boycott a product while still unknowingly buying something from the same damn parent company. you can be complicit in a system by never challenging it at the root, and never looking at the long term effects of your actions. you put money in the basket to help my bail, and then the manager comes along to collect a chunk so I can keep staying "so close" to getting out. what is the point of your actions.

and some of y'all really looked at this entire situation and just went "so this was a kinky awakening for you right OP"

regarding my spouse's grocery store jail charity post, it's one thing to be like "oh i'm personally into being put in a cage" and another thing to say "so that unlocked a kink for you huh?" to the person who was 15 at the time in a deeply uncomfortale retail job where grown men were routinely creepy to them. like, context matters lol, if you wouldnt assume the minor was into it by virtue of it being an inherently exploitative scenario involving a child then dont assume the adult looking back on it is either. that's a bit fucked up.

[heartbeetz]

I really hope the game being out + me beating the main story doesn't have the exact opposite effect it should and like... make me LESS fixated on Anton. He's my special guy I love him a lot. But now I'm not constantly going to be checking the surface of my tank for fish flakes (looking for teasers and dev info and stuff), so... idk. Idk. I hope he stays very important to me for a while.

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

gratitude list time I'll go first

[microwavetoaster-selfships]

Congratulations, Kane! You've successfully determined a grocery store was from the UK by looking at one small section of the shelf and only zooming in and looking for the currency symbol on the price tags after you figured it was from the UK.

[dennisboobs]

most annoying thing about being me is that i cannot engage with like. any fanon shit about dennis because i'm constantly on some advanced derangement and the stuff i thought two years ago when i was first getting comfy in the fandom is still the way everyone else looks at dennis but i'm like. yes but its Worse than this. you're like a quarter of the way there. this isn't the interesting bit, this is a symptom of it, keep going.

[acetheta]

.