#as cher would say
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why did you plagiarize someone else’s pro eddie post 💀
ok so imma make this real simple for you:
● ALL my posts are far from an anti eddie post. I love eddie. as a fellow cunty hispanic he is so dear to me. I think the word you're looking for is pro buddie.
● I have no clue what you're talking about and even if I did this wouldn't be plagiarism if I took an idea and made it my own (assuming that my bucktommy post isnt word for word of this supposed buddie post). Maybe learn the actual definition of plagiarism.
● if you wanna send an ask like this at least have the balls to show your face (as to say: don't do it anonymously) or do you only have the courage when you're anonymous? But really how much more anonymous can you get than a tumblr blog? But whatever go off. Also anonymous is now turned off 😊💕 because if you don't have the courage to send an ask like this without being anonymous (i.e. more anonymous than a fucking tumblr blog 🙄) then you just don't need to send it.
● First I get accused of being a new acc of a racist homophobic (most likely transphobic) white lady in her 40s when I'm hispanic bi nonbinary and 24 and now I'm accused of plagiarism over a silly little post about buck being horny on main for tommy... so fucking done 🙄 if you can't engage in fandom maturly then get off my fucking page istg be ffr.
● so are fanfic writers all plagerists now for taking an idea and making it their own? be for fucking real bro.
● literally don't get how a post about Tommy can sound anything like a post about Eddie when they are literally nothing alike (no matter how many people try to say he's an Eddie knockoff, which like ew).
#wren rants#asked and answered#now go away#911 on abc#911 abc#bucktommy#buddie#fandom discourse#as cher would say#ugh as if!#why cant people fandom maturly anymore#as much as a hellscape as the spn fandom was it really spoiled me and im ickified#i was so excited for 911 cuz it was everything we didnt get to have for dean but now im lowkey wondering at what cost#like im not even a big blog so its a little stressful#but whatever ig
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Everytime The Witcher appropriates the welsh language but the has the GALL to mispronounce it, the power of my rage grows
do you know how seldom Welsh gets a fucking look in?! and the you have the gall to pronounce it like its fucking English
#the witcher#welsh#like i want to be excited because YAY WELSH#but then they do that#HE SAID SHAERRAWEDD 'Cher-Wed' i'm going to scream#its not even proper Welsh but if you're going to base your conlang that hard of an existing language i beg of you learn the rules#say it Shere-a-with#i'm going to start showing witcher colang to my nain to cause her psychic damage#i joke but tbh i think she would like that someone is taking the language she had stripped from her as a kid and is reviving it in a new wa#Anya at least says the first part right#to the point i suspect she studied and did her best but the directors fought her on the dd
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Cher - I Found Someone
#Cher#music videos#1987#the 80s#1980s#my shitty cell phone gifs#my favorite cher song i would say#musicedit
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I HID THE LETTER AND I RACED TO HER PLACE SCREAMED
HØW ČÕŲŁĐ ÝÔŰ
IN HER FACE
#say no to this#yay cher shitposts :3#but it sounds way more...dare i say aggravating#also i know it would be pronounced way different w/ the accents on the letters pls dont come 4 me
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it will literally take a miracle for me to end up liking arkarm more than any of the other boys/ships. like i'm going to like them but i know they'll be at the bottom of my list
#gun and top i knew from the moment i saw them that i would love them#theo mew and cher are so insanely beloved#and akk ummmmmmmm ok akk might get outstripped#but only because his arc REALLY frustrates me and i think he's underdeveloped/unexplored as a character#i don't think i'm going to like arm more than him but ark has a fighting chance#yeah akk is my least favorite of the forcebook boys grab your torch and pitchfork#that doesn't mean i DISLIKE HIM#i know that's hard for fbtwt to understand lmao#say anything vaguely negative about akk everyone fucking freaks out#and i know full well if i said something similar about theo everyone would be SILENT >:(#anyway#ptl liveblog#fb
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#really exhausted by the continuous internal gender struggle#I’m afab who enjoys feminity so why do I always feel like:#woman?#I feel sometimes like I’m half woman and half something else#not man just….not anything on the binary#I hate it because you have a bunch of shitty people who say:#on you just have internal misogyny#but I don’t feel discontent with the feminity I do possess#I just feel like it’s not all there is#I would prefer to be called they#but being called she isn’t upsetting and is easier to navigate the world with#and often enjoyable when I’m reaching for the celebration of feminity#if I could have a face that was perfectly androgynous#(in these sense that you could not tell agab when looking at it)#I would love it#and sometimes I wish I had a completely flat chest#and a deeper voice (like Cher!)#but neither can I say I hate my breasts or the face I do have#because frankly I think they’re very beautiful#and I love feeling beautiful#I’m just so frustrated and feel lonely#I feel like I’m not queer enough to be considered queer and still too queer for everyone else#to actually be open about how I feel about gender in real life#and I don’t feel comfortable being called trans#because I don’t feel like I’m transitioning genders#I just feel so frustrated#and lost
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Prev when my mom who doesn’t like cher went to a cher concert to keep her shithead friend company and then was trash talking the looks of the other women there afterwards (sunglasses lowering emoji)
#jams#mom#like what would cher have to say about this#my mom’s genuinely like the nicest woman in the world but she’s also still a mom so Watch Out
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i can’t believe we live in a society where people genuinely earnestly believe that the media they consume needs a likable protagonist in order to be good or relatable or valuable as art. i will NEVER support a bitch that hates a protagonist just because they’re unlikeable or a bad person… you didn’t get it. read it or watch it again!
#this movie had to say in the beginning that the protagonist wasn’t likable and like. i know it was a joke but also no it’s not….#there are literally people out there that expect all their protagonists to be likable heroes they can relate to in surface level ways becaus#they’ve been spoon fed superhero and sci-fi movies for years and years…:#what happened to the greg heffleys of media. what happened to the jeff wingers of media. what happened to the cher horowitz’s.#when people could watch a movie or read a book and the protagonist would be a total asshole and it was understood that that was the case and#that’s why it’s funny and that’s why it’s relatable because we as humans are not always good…#anyway. that’s my piece. i love scammer liar bitch zoey deutch <3#beth.txt
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anyway i just listened to these albums back to back and they really are just perfect pop albums
like i knew i loved them for reasons but i hadn't listened to them in full in so many years, they really are great pieces of modern production
like they're both so well received, they got radio play, they weren't flops by any means i think, but as album projects they feel underrated in the pop canon
#mfpoty by cher lloyd is actually underrated fr its such a fun party bop#and close by nick jonas w tove lo DID get its recognition but i do think it should be even MORE recognized for being one of the best pop#songs ever created. finneas eilish of billie eilish blood was right saying close is like a song of the century or whatever tf he said#Spotify#also cher lloyd i want her back every day i wish she was still making music i did think she was coming back in like 2021 or something#but nick jonas really is a pop god and im not sure that gets talked about enough... spaceman was also literally stellar#also for 2014 and 2016 respectively they just feel like really ahead of their time like tapped into both the radio pop of the year and also#the sounds that would come into the mainstream in the next 2-3 years forward#a:cherlloyd#a:nickjonas#g:pop#audio#justalkin#minna's reviews
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I mustve blacked out while watching the HGTV episode of Family Guy bc I've been getting auditory hallucinations of the Five Front Doors jingle lately
#ik ive talked abt it before butlike yeah#back when id get super high from a certain substance im too ashamed to even say n id get the head ringing my mind would record sounbites#which present day justlike appear at an audible level whenever im just chilling#ig i get the hallucinations with alcohol too lets so i guess??#at least its better than cameron mikhaels (switch the c and k) singing 'hOLLYWOOD' in a cher voice#and the one song in the WWE episode of sp#tony speaks#drug use mention#ask to tag#this post is rat proof
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hm. I sure have been playing some Very rash and potentially dangerous games as of late ha ha
#wak#like.. have I really become this desperate for attention and validation#that now I'm doing things that could very well compromise what little reputation I have online#like.. @ me: people aren't stupid. they can v much put two and two together even if you don't/won't say who you are#also @ me I wonder... how would the people who rb'ed your gallery comic or your Wholesome™ art feel if they knew about That Side of you?#and God forbid it gets back around to your family/they find out about it somehow! how would your poor grandmother feel I wonder!#or your mutuals/friends you have outside of Skype!#but even while asking these questions and knowing all of the risks I.. just can't help/stop myself#it's as if somebody else has taken over my entire body and I'm going on autopilot now#and like.. how much farther will I go? how long before I abandon everything I stand for just for the sake of wanting to belong somewhere?#and idk how I should feel or what to do and I feel sick and idk#'cher what tf are you talking about' it's actually something incredibly embarrassing and dumb. dw about it#and no it's nothing illegal or even particularly harmful/bad. in fact it's something most people probably wouldn't care about#and I am probably being very overdramatic and thinking too hard rn#but.. dw about it.#vent /#delete later probably
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I'm so happy with the 'Deadpool and Wolverine' Gambit
Man you have no idea, I'm Cajun and I've always been irked by the different variations of Gambit because Remy is one of my favorite characters but he's never been proper Cajun. He's always had a stereotypical southern gentleman accent that's not something anyone in Louisiana or New Orleans would have, he says French words in most variations but none of them are words we actually say here.
But this variation of Gambit, oh he is amazing, he has a proper Cajun accent which I was worried about when I saw Channing Tatum but he nailed it, it's spot on sounds like my family members and friends. They forwent his usual French words that no one here says for actual proper Cajun words we commonly use here in Louisiana the whole theater was going nuts. When he said sha (no one uses cher or mon cher / cheri everyone uses "sha" , " oh sha" or "mah sha" ) instead of cher or cheri you had people clapping and laughing with joy , he called someone a couyon (fool/ idiot in French commonly used even with monolingual english speakers here in louisiana) and everyone was loosing their minds.
I live in the part of Louisiana where Cajun accents, dialect and French are most prevalent in the state and everyone was so happy with Gambit. I love how this variation came out , I think Channing did a terrific job and I hope that any other variations of Gambit in the future are more like this one.
#sorry i just watched the movie and am so happy about this#deadpool spoilers#deadpool and wolverine spoilers#movie spoilers#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#gambit#remy labeau#remy is one of my favorite characters man im so happy#x men gambit#x men#deadpool and wolverine gambit#x men remy lebeau
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I'd Fight The Devil
Pairing: Alastor x fem! reader
Background: reader is Lilith and Lucifers oldest, and resembles Lilith more. Lucifer has a hard time bonding with her because of this, and Alastor decides to step in.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
"DAD'S COMING?!"
(Y/N) Morningstar, firstborn daughter of Lilith and Lucifer, was currently having a breakdown over the fact that her father was on his way to the hotel.
She'd have no issue leaving, of course, but Charlie tricked her dear old sister into staying by saying she needed help with the hotel. . .and told her their dad was coming when he was two minutes away.
It's not like she didn't miss him, but things became different once their mother disappeared. Lucifer threw himself into his ideas, and (Y/N) tried maintaining their relationship but he couldn't even stand the look of her.
"I'm sorry! But I thought maybe you guys could talk while he's here?" Charlie suggested with a gulp, twiddling her fingers.
"I'm done trying with dad. If he wants to talk, he can come to me," (Y/N) crossed her arms, firm on her stance.
"I never thought I'd meet someone with worse daddy issues, but here you are, cher," Alastor, with his famous grin, looked down at the Princess of Hell. She huffed, not in the mood for his side comments.
"Alastor, please-"
"He's here!"
"-please fucking hide me!" She ran behind him, despite the mass amount of blonde hair making it obvious.
He chuckled.
Honestly, since meeting the eldest Morningstar, Alastor deemed himself her Protector. Not that the girl wasn't capable or needed him persay, but he cared for her. Being on the aroace spectrum, he wasn't plagued by a selfish desire to fuck her, but it was a sweet concern that slowly turned into a need to be near her.
A need to make her his.
"Hopefully he doesn't-"
"Pumpkin?"
"Fuck," (Y/N) silently cursed under her breath before Alastor stepped aside.
"Hey dad," Lucifer felt a pang in his sinister heart at her tone. She sounded uncomfortable and wouldn't even look at him, but he also remembered that he couldn't look at her at times.
It reminded him of happier times.
Times he didn't want to be reminded of anymore.
"So how've you been? Heard you've got a fancy job now. Probably making loads of money, huh?" He chuckled nervously.
"Dad, it's my company. I made it."
And he couldn't even remember that she did that?
Any dad would remember that his child created her own business.
"Ouch."
"And it's got a fucking duck on the logo. God, dad," She rose her voice, "you can't even remember that?"
"I've been busy, pumpkin-"
"Too busy to call? Too busy to even fucking call?!"
Charlie flinched at the harshness in her voice. She's always been a firecracker but she's never seen her so angry.
"I'm not fighting with you, (Y/N)," Lucifer stepped towards her, "why do you insist on fighting? Especially when I'm here for Charlie."
"Oh, you're here for Charlie?" Her horns started to come up through her skin, rolling back like a rams.
Just like her mom.
"I'm not making this about me. I just wish you'd make the effort instead of it having to be me," She missed who he was.
And during this, Alastor could see the pain on her face. She was furious, and rightfully so.
But he let her fight her own battles.
"I'm sorry that I look like mom. Is that what you want me to say?!"
"Yes!"
He didn't mean it. Of fucking course he didn't mean it, but it slipped out.
"Dad! That's enough!" Charlie ran to her, seeing tears well up in her sisters eyes. "How could you say that?"
"Pumpkin, I-"
"Don't," She sniffled, holding Charlie close, "don't come near me."
But he didn't listen.
He hated being the fact that his little girl was crying because of him.
"I think you've come far enough," Alastor spoke, getting infront of Charlie and (Y/N). He is excellent at saving face, so his pure unadulterated rage was hidden beneath his smile.
She hiccuped behind him, sobbing into Charlie's shoulder.
"Don't make me move you," Lucifer glared.
"And don't make me fucking kill you for hurting what's mine."
His voice turned more static-like than before, his eyes a burning red and his horns outstretched. He was a fucking shield for his Princess, and not even the King of Hell could get through. Lucifer recognized this and humbly backed away, retreating with his tail between his legs.
_ _ ☆ _ _
(Y/N) spent the next hour crying in her room. Over the years, she had started to hate herself for looking like her mom, and Lucifers' confirmation only reaffirmed it.
"Need anything else?" Charlie asked her. Although her sister wasn't searching for redemption, she had her own personal room in the hotel.
"Can you get Alasto-?"
A knock sounded at the door.
"Was he there the whole time?" She sniffled, and a muffled "maybe" came through the door.
Her bed was surrounded by napkins that she quickly placed on her bedside as Charlie allowed Alastor inside.
Alone.
The two of them.
Might as well just throw them condoms and say get to it, is what (Y/N) was thinking. She's known about her crush on The Radio Demon for a few months now, having a fantasy dream here and there, but wasn't much of an active person herself.
"Thank you. I know he tried to fix it, but I couldn't stand to look at him," Her puffy eyes made Alastors eye twitch, still a small spout of anger for her father.
"Of course, my dear," He sat himself next to her on the bed.
"Because your father, although the King of Hell, is a fucking coward", is what he wanted to say but kept those words for himself.
"Did you mean it? That I'm yours?" She asked, her hand inching closer to his.
"I never say anything I don't mean, cher," He grabbed her hand, kissed it, and made the she-demon gasp.
"I thought you hated touch."
He chuckled, "Oh, I do, but not if it's you. Your skin is warm, and it brings me comfort. You bring me comfort."
"You'd have me, even if I want to be glued to your side? Even having petty fights with my dad?"
"Darling, I'd wear your skin if you asked."
"Oh, how romantic," She blushed before both his hands came up to her face, bringing her into a needy kiss. With her, he needed to feel her.
Someday, even all of her.
"And I'd eat demons with you," She whispered against his lips.
"Oh my heart may burst, my dear."
Taglist: @lorkai @droopingdatura @tr1coo @randomuser-89 @abbiedail @evelin1o1 @sseleniaa
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You want X-Men requests? Well, I think I've got a few kicking around for our favorite Cajun.
Ok, so this is NSFW but like...imagine overstimulated Gambit to the point where he can only speak garbled French? Idk, I think that's super hot.
YES OMG YES. I absolutely love this idea I ran with it SO QUICK! I'm Southern, but not necessarily the Cajun flavor of Southern, so I tried to use a translator/dictionary for Cajun-French. There's not really a translator for cajun dialect specifically, so forgive me for some mistakes. I tried my best ;-;
Tw: MDNI. NSFW. Creampie, Overstim, Praise kink (kinda). Reader written while picturing AFAB but no genitals specified. No pronouns specified. Soft dom!reader
Anyone looking outside-in on Gambit's relationships would think that the man is a player, due to his flirty nature, and he could be to an extent, but you know otherwise.
Remy LeBeau was a lover boy. Sure he showed out a lot by flirting, but at the end of the day it's you he's coming home to. The moment someone tries to make a move on him and flirting goes to touching, you know he's shutting that shit down quick.
He was all talk, and you were happy to find out that extends to the bedroom.
Now having said this, it's not that Remy was a liar. He's incredible at sex, but at the end of the day when he's with someone he truly loves, his walls come down. Loverboy was putty in your hands the moment you decided to grace him with your love and praise.
"Plus, donnez-m'en un de plus, s'il vous plaît." Remy is trembling underneath you, head tossed back into the pillow and twitching inside you still as he cums hard. His hands are clenched around your thighs, grip loose enough for you to grind on him slowly as he comes down from his high.
"Remy, I can't understand you." You say softly, cocking your head at him as you brush some hair out of his face. He leans into your touch, chest still heaving. He mumbles something else you can't quite catch, before repeating "donnez-m'en un de plus, donnez-m'en un de plus." Again and again.
"Reeemmmy~" You smile, rocking back against him just slightly to make him groan and curse, before leaning forward to kiss him on the chin. He tries to catch you in a real kiss, but you don't let him, choosing to hover over his lips teasingly. "English, please, sweetheart."
"Je commence Cher, don't tease." Remy whines, leaning forward again. You let him kiss you this time, unable to stop yourself from giving into Remy's charms. You grind onto him a little more to hear him moan and gasp into the kiss, and his grip on your thighs gets a little tighter. He mumbles again in Cajun, and you shake your head at him. He'd been trying to teach you, but you still weren't quite fluent. You decide you should ask him to teach you bedroom phrases soon. It'd make this a whole lot easier- but you wouldn't lie, you almost enjoy teasing him like this.
"One more, Cher. Please. Please, give me another one." Remy finally grunts. He looks at you with those pretty eyes of his, all blurry with his pupils dilated. You can't help but lean in and kiss him a few more times. You lift your hips, before sinking back down onto his cock with a little more force this time. He gasps out a broken "merci! merci," tears starting to trail down his cheeks as you start to ride him again.
"Oh- Only because you asked... so nicely." You moan. It's a struggle to get the words out, fighting your own oversensitivity, but hearing Remy crumble beneath you is worth how sore you would be in the morning ten times over.
#remy lebeau#gambit#gambit x reader#remy lebeau x reader#x men 97 smut#x men 97#x men headcannons#x men smut#x men#x men comics#x men 97 x reader#gambit smut#remy lebeau smut
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brother i still have no idea how tumblr works and this is my first request and it might not even be in the right place but—
why does NO ONE talk about the fact that “Allie” would be such a silly nickname for Alastor? i would love to see some headcanons/a lil story about how he would react to the reader calling him that. maybe completely detests it at first but secretly likes it?
a/n: hello lovely, you've come to the right place 🫶 yes yes yes!!! i'm obsessed with this idea <3 i'm adding to this: he would think you're mad at him when you finally call him normally again ^ ^
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
"What did you say?"
"Huh?" You hum, attention devoted to fixing Alastor's bowtie.
"That thing you just said. Repeat it."
You finally blink at him, using your palms to smooth out the front of his jacket before stepping out of his bubble. "I said your tie was undone."
"No, dear, before that."
The Radio Demon can feel his eye twitching in irritation. You look at him again dumbly, trying to retrace your steps.
"Oh!" You flash him a little smile and he thinks his brain is going to explode. "Allie?"
He just gawks at you, surprised by the sheer audacity you have. And it doesn't help that he's so fond of you that he doesn't even want to strike you down.
Had it been someone else calling him so endearingly, he might have done something violent. But how could he do that to you, his darling companion, when you look so sweet calling him such a ridiculous name?
"My apologies but... where did that come from?"
"Isn't it cute?" You grin, completely dodging his question.
No, he wants to say. Absolutely not. However, your smile is ever-growing and he can't very well deny you this pleasure. So he sucks it up, draws in a deep inhale to compose himself, and nods.
"Of course, cher."
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
Weeks pass and the rest of your friends in the hotel begin to raise a brow at how casually you address such a powerful Overlord. And more than that, he doesn't seem to want to correct you.
It becomes his name reserved exclusively for you. Angel had tried, once, to purr out Allie in a seductive way that made Alastor's skin crawl. Never again.
He gets used to it. Even likes the idea that there is something shared between you that no one else can have. That is, until you're pushing around your breakfast on a plate one morning.
"Can you pass the salt, Alastor?"
He looks up from his mug of coffee in confusion, brain taking a moment to buffer before it catches up with his already moving mouth.
"Alastor?" He repeats his own name, staring at you intensely and most definitely not passing the salt over the table.
You look back up at him blankly. "That's your name, don't wear it out."
He scoffs at your lame joke before sliding the salt shaker over the table. There's something unsettling him and he can't quite place it.
Setting down his newspaper, he watches you as you eat. His gaze is so fiery that you look up from your food almost instantly.
"What's wrong?"
"Are you alright? Have I done something to upset you?"
Your brows scrunch. "No, why?"
"Why did you not call me Allie?"
Complete and utter silence settles over the dining table until he feels like he can't breathe. Your spoonful of food hovers just in front of your open mouth as you stare.
Then, laughter. Laughter fills the room and his ears so heartily that he feels it in his own chest. You double over the table in your fit, spoon clinking onto the plate as you drop it.
"What?" He grumbles.
"Of course I'm not mad at you!" You howl, using a finger to wipe up the tears gathering in your eyes. "'Sides, I thought you hated that name?"
His jaw grows taut. "Hate is a powerful word."
"So you like it?"
"Absolutely not!"
"Liar, you do!"
Alastor is never one to get flustered, but here he is for the first time in his afterlife, teetering on the edge of bursting out in flames. "You are terrible, you know that?"
You snicker, leg getting trapped between his under the table. "Yeah, Allie, I know."
Yet the way his smile softens says it all.
~
taglist: @the-lake-is-calling @dragons-and-dwarves-are-nice @averylonelysea @bri22222 @cxrsedwxrlds @amarokofficial @anae-naea-zacheria @for-hearthand-home @fantasy-is-best @angixyc (send an ask to be added!)
#alastor#alastor x reader#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin alastor#hazbin x reader#alastor fanfic#alastor fanfiction#alastor fic#alastor headcanons#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor x you#hazbin hotel fanfiction#hazbin hotel headcanon#hazbin#hazbin hotel fanfic#hazbin hotel headcanons#faye's thoughts — ☁
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iii. deer dolly
see all chapters here tags: fem! reader, reader is a performer in a speakeasy, jealousy, possessiveness, written before episode 7; may become inaccurate, gorey-ish descriptions of love, murder
The next night, Alastor returned in unusually high spirits. He practically dragged you onto the dance floor, twirling you around in dizzying circles for eight whole rounds. If you hadn't asked him to stop, you might have ended up collapsing from sheer exhaustion.
As it was a Saturday night and you weren't scheduled to perform, the trio of you settled in at the bar, enjoying drinks and each other's company as the night wore on.
"Come on, doll! Bottoms up!" Mimzy cheered, her laughter bubbling with infectious energy. The blonde pressed a crystal-clear glass against your lips, tilting it up and urging you to indulge further. The cool liquid burned as it slid down your throat, leaving a tingling sensation in its wake. The room turned into a swirling blend of jazz melodies, clinking glasses, and loud, loud chatter.
After a few seconds, unable to endure the relentless flow of alcohol, you finally pushed her hand away with a sputter and a cough. The taste of the giggle water lingered on your lips as you slumped against Alastor's chest, your burning cheeks squished against the fabric of his coat.
"Had a bit too much, have we?" he smirked. The radio host smoothly wrapped an arm around your shoulder, the fine fabric of his suit brushing against your skin as he held you upright against him. You nestled against Alastor, swaying slightly to the music, the alcohol-induced haze casting a dreamy glow over your vision. "My, it looks as though the night's got its claws in you, cher."
"Not yet it hasn't," you grinned, your words slurring slightly as you shifted against him, a hand outstretched to grab your drink off the counter.
"Ah ah ah," Alastor chuckled as he took your glass from you, setting it aside with a careful motion. "Let's not push our luck, shall we?"
"Aw, don't be such a wet blanket!" Mimzy snorted, her curls bouncing as she plopped onto the seat beside you. "She's just having a good time! Ain't that right, doll?"
"Mhm!" you nodded your head eagerly before stopping, the ceaseless nodding causing a dull ache in your head.
"There's a good time, and then there's getting plastered. I'd hate to see the star of the show here end up on the floor. Ha ha!" Alastor boomed out with a laugh, catching you off guard. You would have stumbled off the seat if it weren't for his swift reflexes, his gloved hand wrapping around your arm to pull you back up.
"Such a klutz," Alastor tutted with a smirk as he steadied you. "See? What ever would happen to my favorite showgirl if I don't keep a watchful eye?"
"Oh, please!" Mimzy snorted as she slid another cool glass of giggle water in front of you, leaving a glistening trail of water from the condensation. "She's handled worse than this. We're just getting started!”
"Mimzy, my dear, it seems my words didn't quite get into that thick skull of yours," Alastor enunciated with a tight-lipped smile. "Allow me to say it in much more simpler terms; she has had enough."
"Oh, come on—"
"Do you want all your patrons to witness yet another fiasco in this establishment?"Alastor smiled as he bore his gaze into the blonde's doe eyes. "Because it does sure seem like a night can't pass here without a fuckup!"
Mimzy's shoulders raised in surprise. She stayed silent for a while before forcing out a response through gritted teeth. "No."
Alastor leaned in, glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose, voice devoid of his usual eccentricity. "Then dry up. Understood?"
"Understood," Mimzy rolled her eyes, tucking her chin to her chest as she stared at her feet.
"Lovely." Alastor hummed before straightening himself. And just like that, the tension dissipated, replaced by an air of nonchalance.
"Well! This has been a delightful night, but I do believe it's time to escort this lovely lady home, don't you think?" Alastor's tone shifted back to its usual charm, as nothing had happened. He wrapped an arm around your waist, tugging your ditzy self out of the bar stool as he began to guide you out of the speakeasy.
"Best of luck, chums!"
.
"Can you believe it? That lousy, two-timing rat! You introduce him to the girl of his dreams, and what does he do? He high-tails it outta here with her, leaving us all high and dry!" Mimzy ranted, shaking her fist in frustration before pouring herself another drink. "Not a word for a whole week! I had to call in Nitwit Nancy to cover her Friday shifts! And you know that broad sounds like a screeching cat on a hot tin roof."
Beside her, Angel Dust was flabbergasted, his jaw hanging open with the champagne glass dangling loosely from his hands, its contents long spilled onto the counter, creating a shimmering puddle on the bar. Husk grumbled as he wiped the counter clean with a worn-out rag, eyes flickering between Mimzy and Angel.
The spider was staring at Mimzy as if the blonde had just sprouted a third tit, his eyes wide and struggling to process everything he had just been told.
“Why is you gawkin'?!” Mimzy leaned away from Angel, unsettled by the look on his face. “Aww. Is it 'cuz I'm adorable?”
"Fuckin' hell, toots," the spider coughed out a laugh. "I'm having difficulty understanding all that you just spat at me, blondie. What happened to you ‘keeping a secret’?"
Mimzy's body tensed, a sudden realization flashing across her face as she belatedly registered the fact that she had been running her mouth.
Shaking her head, she pulled herself back together with a huff. "Whatever, alright?! I doubt—"
Suddenly, a loud bang at the door echoed through the room, causing the two demons to startle in their seats. Mimzy's head snapped towards the source of the noise so swiftly she nearly gave herself whiplash. In growing horror, she watched as the hinges of the hotel's entrance door began to creak, the walls around them starting to crack and shed plaster.
"Mimzy! We know you're in there! You lousy bitch!"
"Oh, shit," she winced sinking into her seat.
"What the fuck—" Husk cursed, his words drowned out by the sudden explosion that violently rattled the lower windows. Shards of glass rained down onto the floor as dust and debris filled the air, choking their senses. Husk whipped his head around to glare at Mimzy when she vaulted over the bar counter, seeking refuge behind the sturdy wood.
"I fucking knew it. What shit have you brought to us this time?" Husk demanded, his grip tightening on her dress as he lifted her up. Another explosion echoed through the building, the shockwaves pulsing through the floor causing Husk to stumble and drop her.
With a pained grunt, the blonde crashed to the floor, her bruised front absorbing the brunt of the impact. As she lifted her head, she met Husk's glare.
"Ahah... Well," Mimzy sheepishly smiled, her eyes darting nervously as she cowered on the floor. The banging on the door grew louder and more aggressive, echoing through the hotel lobby like a menacing drumbeat.
Angel Dust stood frozen by one of the living room walls, his hands pressed against it to anchor himself. Suddenly, he noticed the television set flickering with an eerie glow, emitting dissonant static noises that seemed to crawl under his fur. The crackling sound took on an unsettling pitch, and an odd pink electricity surged through the screen, casting a sickly hue across the room. "What the fuck...?!"
In that moment, Vaggie and Charlie stormed onto the scene, their eyes widening in disbelief as they absorbed the chaotic sight. The hotel lobby, once orderly and serene, now lay in ruins—furniture overturned, glass shattered, and the wallpaper charred.
"What's happening?!" Vaggie exclaimed, swiftly drawing her spear and slicing a chunk of concrete in half before it could reach her. The broken pieces ricocheted off the walls, adding to the destruction.
"We are under sssiege!" Sir Pentious screamed as he scrambled to get Nifty into his arms, slithering behind the toppled-over couch for cover. The banging on the door intensified, accompanied by muffled threats and angry shouts from outside. "It'sss all that harlot'sss fault!
"Harlot?" Vaggie questioned, her fiery gaze sweeping the room for a familiar mop of blonde hair. Upon spotting Mimzy, her eyes narrowed as her lips curled into a snarl. "Explain."
"I may or may not be in trouble with an overlord! Well, maybe a couple of 'em," Mimzy rushed out, her words tumbling over each other in a nervous babble. "And I may or may not have 'borrowed' one of their top showgirls. And, well, got that girl killed… but she had it coming!"
Vaggie's patience waned with each new sentence Mimzy added, and a low groan escaped her lips.
"Leave this to me," she hissed, red-hot fury flashing in her eyes as she tightened her grip on her spear. "Everyone, get somewhere safe."
"I'm afraid that will not be necessary, my dear."
A sudden crackling static, skin to the ominous hum of a radio, seeped through the room as Alastor emerged from the shadowed corners. The demon's grin twisted unnaturally, stretching up to his glowing crimson eyes, which emitted an eerie, hollow glow. Tendrils of inky shadow began to writhe and sprout from Alastor's back, emitting sickening cracking noises.
In the blink of an eye, he dashed outside, engaging in his unholy work, swiftly and effortlessly ridding the area of its assailants. The air outside carried echoes of screams and the sharp, metallic scent of blood.
Before everyone could fully comprehend the whirlwind of events that had just transpired, the screaming ceased. Shortly after, Alastor returned to his usual demeanor. Nonchalantly stepping back into the damaged lounge, he dusted off his suit, traces of blood marking his path on the floors.
"Alastor! Babyface! Good show!" Mimzy began clapping, seemingly unfazed by the gorey scene as she stepped out of her hiding spot. "Bravo! bravo!"
Upon hearing Mimzy's voice, Alastor's head fully twisted around with a loud, bone-chilling crack accompanying the movement. The radio demon moved toward her, his towering 7-foot form eclipsing her much smaller figure. He bared his sharp teeth in a menacing smile as his antlers began to grow in length, curling and twisting over his head—a display nothing short of terrifying.
"You—"
"Alastor~" Charlie's voice quivered with forced cheerfulness, her hands wringing together anxiously. "Haha! Let's, uh, try to keep our cool here, okay? We really don't need any more messes, do we? Haha!"
The princess's attempt at forced cheerfulness made her look desperate, her manic expression surfacing as her pupils visibly shrank, darting around the room like startled prey.
Alastor closed his eyes, the tension in his form visible as he took a moment to regain composure. Gradually, his antlers reverted to their usual size. With an eerie calm settling over him, he reopened his eyes, though the strain was evident in his smile. "My apologies, chum. I'll be out of your hair in a bit."
He spared Charlie one more glance, his gaze piercing, before redirecting his attention to Mimzy. The intensity in his stare bore into her as he spoke, his voice low and measured. "Since you are so eager to catch up, why don't we have a talk? In private."
With that, the radio demon snapped his fingers, transporting both of them out of the lounge.
"Dumb bitch," Husk grumbled under his breath, covering his eyes with his paws and slamming his head onto the bar counter. "We're all fucked once he finds out."
"Find out what?" Walking up to him, Angel Dust shot Husk a confused look. The spider delicately brushed away the dust that clung to his grey fur, picking out the bigger pieces of cement and plaster. "I thought they were friends?"
Husk raised his head off the counter, mismatched eyes meeting Angel's own. "Not anymore."
.
Mimzy slowly opened her eyes, greeted by the surreal sight of a blood-red room surrounding her. It housed a radio station complete with an array of dials and a microphone, the very tools she knew Alastor utilized for his broadcasts.
'His broadcasting station?' she noted, curiously looking about the room.
Suddenly, Alastor's firm grip closed around her shoulder, causing her to whirl around with disorienting speed. His bloodied claws moved to cradle both of her rosy cheeks, their sharp edges looming dangerously close to breaking skin while he squeezed her face as though dealing with a disobedient child.
"I thought I made it very clear that you were to step nowhere near me," Alastor forced her to stare up at him. Despite the discomfort caused by Alastor's claws digging in, Mimzy maintained her confident demeanor and glared straight back up at him. "Did I not, dearest?"
"Oh, I just ran into a spot of trouble, and I thought, who better to lend a helping hand than you?" Mimzy rolled her eyes as she pulled herself away from his grasp, massaging the tender flesh of her cheeks. "You always love helping lil ole me."
"Enough. What is it you want?" Alastor snapped. "Should you persist in wasting more of my precious time, I will relish tearing you apart limb from limb, and the symphony of your sweet screams will be a broadcast for all of Hell to revel in."
Mimzy, unfazed, leaned in with a sly grin, her fingers playfully tracing the lapel of Alastor's coat. "Alright, tall, dark, and creepy. I know you aren't going to do shit."
"After all," she batted her lashes at him, "Hurting me would be hurting her, now wouldn't it?"
The blonde pressed her finger into his chest, poking him repeatedly. "That was in the contract~ You. Heartless. Son. Of. A. Bitch."
A low, guttural chuckle rumbled in the depths of Alastor's throat. "Oh, sweetheart," he drawled, catching her finger mid-poke. "You seem to be overlooking the delicate nature of contracts. It might be wise for you to tread more carefully, relying on such flimsy assurances."
"Flimsy?!" Mimzy scowled. "I got your girl on a leash!"
"Lets make this very clear," Alastor's voice deepened into a growl, eyes flashing red in warning. "This contract doesn't grant you a carte blanche to play games with my patience. If not for her plea to spare you, your fate would have been sealed by now."
As Alastor's grip moved to tighten around her throat, Mimzy's eyes nervously tracked the sharp edge of his claws, her breath catching in her throat.
"W-Whatevah! A contract is a contract," she retorted. Mimzy roughly pulled away from him, scrambling to gain the upper hand again. "Even if there ain't a soul exchange, it's still binding!"
"Yes, indeed! I am well aware of contractual obligations, dear," Alastor grinned, his cane tightening in his grip, claws leaving indents on the dark steel. Bending down to meet her gaze, he continued, "But you seem to have forgotten that time's almost up! The expiration for your contract is nearing. And when that happens, I do intend to reclaim what is rightfully mine – my wife. At that point, you will find yourself plunged into an abyssal world of unrelenting agony."
"Abyss, schmabyss. I've dealt with worse," Mimzy scoffed, her hand waving dismissively. "Now look, I got what I wanted outta you, and I don't have to take this."
With that, the blonde turned with a dramatic flair, her heels clicking against the floor as she stomped towards the door. She adjusted her hair and straightened her dress, a smug smirk dancing on her lips.
"Have fun with your little princess and your little project," she quipped.
Over her shoulder, she shot Alastor one last look, a sly glint in her eyes. "Because I sure am having fun with mine~"
Dry up - Shut up Giggle Water - Liquor Carte Blanche - Complete freedom to act as one wishes
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