#as an asexual he means the world to me

[plinko-soup]

SINCE PPL REALLY LIKE MY CARY POST... i never finished this but its ANCIENT now. So i'll roll him out of my WIPs i think. I was going to finish this after my first cary drawing but I just lost motivation... Sorry Cary... maybe I'll draw you again soon <3

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

At The Feet Of The Sun

book 2 in a slow paced high fantasy duology*

the right hand of the emperor (who is off searching for an heir) struggles with what to do after passing on his responsibilities and also discovering various pieces of information that are mindblowing to him, personally,

after adventure is thrust upon him, he travels to find His Radiancy and they go on some otherworldly adventures while growing closer and figuring out the nature of their friendship

(*there’s extra novellas & i think another book coming? duology adjacent, currently,)

[mars-ipan]

look i love my asexual headcanons to death and what i’m about to say in no way discounts said asexual headcanons. with that disclosed i do not think aziraphale is a “virgin” (<- virginity isn’t real but you get my point) take one look at that angel and tell me he didn’t go to bacchanals i mean come the fuck on

[asexualenjolras]

CA$H PIGGOTT.

I need to talk about Cash Piggott and how important his character is to the asexual community.

I absolutely adore the fact that Cash calls people out on their acephobia and never, ever apologises for who he is. He doesn't think he's broken.

In season one, we see Darren say "you know what, I think there's something really fucking wrong with you, Cash," and Cash immediately, with no hesitation, screams "well fuck you then".

In season two, we see Dusty say that he's being selfish asking Darren to give up sex and he immediately stands up and says "fuck this" because he knows he doesn't have to listen to people making him feel bad about his sexuality.

And when he's talking to his nan about it, Cash says "it's not fair, I would do anything, why does it have to be the one thing I can't change about myself?"

In every single one of these scenes, we never see Heartbreak High blame Cash for his sexuality. We never see him apologise to anyone for not feeling sexual attraction, and we never see him feel guilty about it, or try to change who he is.

CA$H recognises that his sexuality might be difficult for people to accept and understand, but he never lets other people make him feel like he's broken, or flawed. And that's so powerful to see.

Because asexual people are not broken. And we can't be fixed. And we are not being selfish for putting in boundaries.

I absolutely adore Douglas Piggott. He means the world to me, and this representation is so, so important.

[thereallyreallylatebird]

From some of the discourse I've seen, I've gotten the impression that some people think intersectionality is like math. Let me explain.

Some people think of certain identities as universally giving privilege (we'll say these have a value of +1) and some as universally taking privileged/causing discrimination/bigotry/etc. (we'll say these have a value of -1).

And what I've seen is that people will add these values and decide how hard someone has it based on the value of the product.

For example: A white (+1) Christian (+1) gay (-1) man (+1) would have a score of 2, since 1+1-1+1 is 2. (Keep in mind I'm not saying people literally do this sort of math, though I have actually seen charts that do, it's more of a way of illustrating a way of thinking I've seen.)

The problem with this, of course, is that this isn't how the world works at all. Depending on where he lived and his situation in general, that white Christian gay man could be bullied severely, called slurs, or even beaten and killed--all things you wouldn't expect going off a score of 2--because intersectionality is not like math. And because, in some places, this man's gayness would overshadow all his other identities.

Also, this mathy way of looking at things fails to consider how identities interact with each other. For instance, (and this is something several of my mutuals, but especially @dysphoria-things, have discussed in the past) a trans man's identity as a man does *not* serve to "cancel out" his being trans in the eyes of society. First, many won't even view him as a man. Second, even if he is viewed as a man by a certain group, he still may be subject to less explicit forms of transphobia. Not to mention the expectation many hold that he perform his man-ness in order for them to keep seeing him as a man. There's a lot more to unpack here specifically, but the previously mentioned mutual has already done many many posts on this, and is more qualified to speak on this than I am as a cis person, so I suggest you go check that blog out if you want to hear more on this topic.

Another example would be one of *my* identity intersections. That of being aromantic and allosexual. Now, being allosexual (not asexual) is not a minority identity. However, it by no means "cancels-out" my aromanticism. In fact, the specific combination of this majority identity (allosexuality) with my aromanticism actually leads to some seriously nasty assumptions and stereotypes. Because what do you think goes through the majority of people's (especially conservative's) heads when they hear "Oh I'm attracted to people sexually, but not romantically." Nothing flattering.

Point is, intersectionality is not like math. Having a majority identity does not necessarily mean that identity will always be rewarded (especially depending on the combination with a minority identity), and also this way of thinking is one thing that can start people down the "oppression-olympics/who has it worst" route, which is helpful and productive to exactly no one. The world is complicated, society is complicated, and people are complicated. And anything boiled down this much is usually inaccurate enough to be useless or actively harmful. Thank you for coming to my TED-talk.

[delucat]

25 Questions About Bloody Painter

1. Birthday? Height? Physique?

Born on October 1, 1980, under the Libra sign.

In the current storyline, he's about 26 years old.

He stands 178 cm tall with a well-built physique.

2. Favorite food and drink?

He loves sweets and cocoa; basically, he enjoys all kinds of chocolate.

In all official works, the brown drink you see him consuming is not coffee but cocoa.

3. What kind of scent does he have?

He uses perfume to mask the smell of formalin used in specimen preparation or the rusty smell of blood.

His preferred scent is oceanic.

4. His MBTI?

INTJ.

5. Preferred clothing style?

He likes simple and sleek outfits, often wearing colors in calm tones.

Also, the blue jacket he usually wears isn’t a trench coat; it’s a suit jacket.

6. Does he smoke or drink?

He doesn't smoke or drink because he finds the smell of smoke pungent and dislikes the bitter taste of alcohol.

If he has to drink, he prefers fruity soda-like alcohol or sweet cocktails that barely taste like alcohol (he has childlike taste preferences). His alcohol tolerance is average.

7. Does he listen to music? What genre?

He listens to almost anything and becomes particularly interested in music with unique styles from an artistic appreciation standpoint.

8. How does he kill?

He's a clean freak and dislikes making a mess at crime scenes.

His methods focus on easy cleanup, avoiding unnecessary torture of his victims.

9. Does he cook for himself? What type of dishes does he usually make?

He’s good at household chores and can prepare common Western dishes.

10. Favorite color?

Blue.

11. Does he watch TV shows or movies? What genres does he like?

Yes, he enjoys anything with innovative themes or visual techniques.

However, he dislikes romance dramas because he can't understand or relate to love, which makes them boring for him.

12. Is he a light or heavy sleeper?

He’s a night owl and a light sleeper, which causes his prominent dark circles.

13. When does he wear gloves?

He only wears gloves when handling objects or when he doesn’t want to leave fingerprints.

14. Preferred medium for painting?

For his public art, he prefers oil paints for oil paintings.

As for those darker pieces, he might mix in victims' blood or other substances.

15. Does he smile when he’s in a good mood?

Yes, but it’s rare for anyone to see it. Also, when he’s shy, he tries to hide his emotions by looking away, but his flushed cheeks and ears give him away.

16. Regarding character pairings?

In the 2018 version update, all pairings with other authors' OCs were removed to keep his story realistic. He is currently single.

However, fans are free to create any pairings in their fanworks.

17. Defining trait?

Selfishness.

18. Sexual orientation?

He identifies as agender, meaning he doesn’t feel tied to any particular gender. His attraction to others is based purely on his mood and feelings.

To put it simply, he doesn’t care about gender.

Also, agender ≠ asexual; he still has sexual desires but finds it difficult to develop intimate relationships due to his cautious nature (which likely means he's still a virgin).

19. In terms of intimacy?

He behaves gently and gentlemanly, but he has a deep-seated violent streak.

If his partner consents, he may become more dominant and leave marks, enjoying the sense of control.

20. Does he have possessiveness towards his partner?

Yes, but he respects his partner, so he wouldn’t try to control or limit them.

However, it’s clear when he’s jealous!

21. What was his childhood like?

He suffered severe mental abuse from his controlling mother, leaving him psychologically shattered, though his body bears no signs of physical abuse.

For more details, refer to the 2018 version story animation: https://youtu.be/AaHgY62-ggI

22. Would he make a good father?

Since he never experienced a normal family life, he doesn’t believe he would be a good father and doesn’t aspire to become one.

He thinks, "The world doesn’t need another me." However, he would make a great older brother or mentor.

23. Ethnicity and nationality?

The official story doesn’t specify his nationality, but he is ethnically white.

24. Is he really afraid of cockroaches?

He’s not afraid of insects and even makes insect specimens.

His fear of cockroaches stems more from his germaphobia than the insect itself, as he perceives them as dirty creatures.

25. Any other tidbits?

● He values manners, so he avoids cursing. Still, in moments of stress, he might accidentally let out a quiet curse. 

● When he’s alone and relaxed or happy, he hums to himself.

=================================== 

Do you have any more questions about Bloody Painter?

Feel free to ask in the comments, and I’ll reply when I have time!

[writteninlunarlight-years]

Them saying someone elses name during sex TW: AFAB Reader, 18+ MDNI, ANGST

Adam

You knew that sleeping with Adam was a risk, yet you were so in love with the man that you didn't dare refuse the offer.

His dick was divine, and the way he worshiped your body was even better.

However, you never realized that he paid such special attention to you and your needs in bed because of how much you resembled Eve.

You weren't her carbon copy by no means, but your pussy, smell, and voice were a damn close match for Adam.

As he was balls deep in you, pounding you relentlessly, it's when it happened.

A soft whine left your throat at how good he was kissing your cervix with his angry red tip when the faint 'Yes, Eve...I know you like it...' was heard.

He hadn't caught what he had said, yet you heard it clear as day, and your world shattered.

All the nights, he slept with you, not because he loved you how you loved him, but because he was trying to have a moment with Eve that he would never have again.

The following day you tried to talk about it with him, tears stained your eyes, and you shook from the sobs as he coldly reminded you that you were only a fuck, nothing more.

Your nightly visits became less and less, the ones you did have he unashamedly would moan out for Eve while he fucked you.

Eventually, you were just another woman, a notch in his bedpost as he looked for the next replacement for Eve.

Alastor

You knew all sexual interactions with him were just for steam release and nothing more. Alastor was Asexual and only seemed to seek you out for a quick get it out of my system moment.

You wouldn't lie that you felt special; he always chose you, excitement coursing through your veins when he was a little snappier and colder to others, signaling his time of need.

However, you never expected to have your whole world flipped upside down as he fucked you one night.

He had your knees to your chest as he rammed into you, making you scream and cry in blissful pain.

He was larger than any man you had been with, and this was what you craved for months that no sex worker or toy could do for you.

Yet when the words 'Oh fuck Liz, just like that' left his lips, you froze, your whole body clamming up.

He quickly realized his mistake, the walls he let down around you, and the session ended.

For weeks, you two never talked about anything that happened, and you wallowed in limbo.

You knew sex for him was just a release, yet you wouldn't lie. You fantasized about being romantic with him. Maybe that is why another woman's name from his lips hurt so badly.

When his next need arose, he called on you again, but things were awkward; he was stiff and just working you to get his own pleasure, and you were well there.

You tried to talk about what happened after he had his fill, yet he shut you out and asked you to leave, or else this would never happen again.

Lucifer

You witnessed the day Lilith left Lucifer and Charlie. It was horrible and painful, to say the least. As the one to pick up the pieces, you also became the best friend who fell in love with him.

You kept your feelings to yourself, knowing he needed time to heal and process what Lilith had done to him and his child.

However, when Charlie invited you to the hotel, it was a grand occasion and allowed you space from Lucifer so you wouldn't breach that boundary.

Only half a year after joining the hotel, he looked like a different man. He was no longer depressed and obsessed with ducks, and he was so much more handsome.

It didn't take long for the looks and touches to escalate to you riding his cock in the luxury bed that he conjured in the new hotel.

The battle, having almost taken your life, led you to believe Lucifer realized how much he loved you for what you did for him and Charlie.

However, as you moaned out again when the tip of his white cock brushed your G spot, you heard his moan too.

He grunted deeply, his hands holding your hips. 'Fuck Lilith, ride me so good, baby'

Quickly, you hopped off of him, and like lightning struck, Lucifer realized what had happened. Apologies after the apology had left his lips, but nothing mattered to you.

You avoided Lucifer like the plague; eventually, the whole hotel noticed. Even though he was heartbroken to lose his friend, he couldn't deny his love for Lilith.

It could have been more productive when Charlie finally convinced you two to sit down and talk. It was only filled with you asking why he would sleep with you, knowing you cared for him, and him simply sitting in guilty silence.

Not too long after, you left the hotel and were never heard from again as you reclused to avoid the sting of always being the other woman.

Husk

It was hard to get in Husk's bed, and he wouldn't deny that he had some underlying feelings for you. He also knew you; you were as hopelessly in love with him as he was with someone else.

He hated using you, but he convinced himself he could be a better man and make himself love you and care for you.

He treated your body right each night he brought you to his bedroom, from sensual make-outs to hours between your thighs.

However, as the rouse continued, he almost convinced himself he finally began to love you how you loved him, yet he was dead wrong.

You were on your hands and knees before him, back arched beautifully, and your moans muffled by the soft pillows.

When it happened, you were begging so nicely for more of him to be filled to the brim with his kits.

As he came deep inside your gummy walls, he let out, "Fuck, Angel feels so good in you," and your high was quickly erased.

Husk realized immediately, even while drunk, what had happened. Sorry's, and let me explain, left his mouth as you looked at him and yourself with disgust.

You know the two had a thing for one another, but due to their contracts, they were separated. A pitiful laugh left your mouth as you gathered your clothes and did the walk of shame.

As you made it back to your room in the hotel, you saw Angel, and though you cared for the sex worker, you couldn't help the venom that left your voice when he asked what had happened to you.

You just hope when the two finally fuck, Husk remembers what he did to you and hurts as badly as he hurt you.

Vox

Vox was a man of carnal pleasure, and he was known to get around; his only consistent sex partner was Val, but when things went south between them, it was rough.

You happened to stumble into the world of the Vees around that time, and Vox took a special interest in you and what you could offer.

At first, for you, the sex was transactional, your safety and protection for the price of being dicked down by the overlord of cyber security.

However, it grew to be more over the years, and you wanted it to be more than just a quick fuck or a rough session.

When you propositioned a more sensual night, Vox relented, seeing as it had been years of using you for his pleasure, and he was sure he would be fine.

However, as the night progressed and he languidly slid in and out of your frothy tight hole, he began to lose himself.

As you came over and over from his hands and cock you couldn't help but feel something was off with Vox; he usually was aggressive, and even though you asked for something more sensual, you figured he would cave by now.

However when you looked over your shoulder and saw the blue 'Fuck I miss you Val' screen on his face you felt your whole mood shift.

He wanted Val and always had; you were just the convenient dumb fuck that appeared right when he needed you.

Vox doesn't remember most of that night or when you became so cold about having sex with him. You went from excited to barely caring.

He also had no idea what possessed you to suddenly seek out Valentino's or Velvette's beds. He was shocked that you willingly stopped being his personal toy so blatantly.

It hurt him, but he would never know how badly he had hurt you.

Prompt assistance: @literallurker

[one-paper-bag]

okay i know the girlies are talking about Isaac in regards to the aroace rep and realisations (and as they should he’s a phenomenal character and he means the world to me!!) but can we talk about Charlie in s2 episode 6 when he says to Nick “if you didn’t ever want to do it, then I wouldn’t either.”

i’m asexual biromantic and i worry about being rejected for not wanting something that 99% of the population wants, i’m worried that i won’t be able to have a fulfilling relationship with an allo person because i feel like i’d be robbing them of something that i’ve been taught is expected in relationships. But hearing Charlie say, so easily, “if you didn’t ever want to do it… I wouldn’t either.” is so personal to me because he’s literally saying that he can still love Nick and be in a fulfilling relationship with him and never have sex and that it’s okay if Nick never wants to have sex

[hersterical]

I’ve put a little too much thought into atla slang for gay people tonight so here’s this.

Kyoshi Island:

Speaks about sexuality openly on Kyoshi Island but knows to be more careful around outsiders.

“Is she, you know…a student of Rangi?” (gay/lesbian)

“No. But she does follow in the footsteps of Avatar Kyoshi. She prefers the versatility of the fan over the sword or the shield.” (bi)

Water Tribe:

More “traditional” than the other nations so it’s a bit more subtle and reliant on accompanying eyebrow movements, hand gestures, and tone of voice.

“He’d rather go sailing than stay in the village.” (mlm)

“She’s shown some interest in ice fishing.” (sapphic)

“I personally prefer to fish in the same waters as Avatar Kuruk.” (bi)

“He’d rather spend the winter months alone.” (ace)

Earth Kingdom:

“Are you a member of the Flying Opera Company?” (lgbt+)

No one, including the Kyoshi Islanders are aware of the origins of this particular phrase

Fire Nation:

“I’ve dabbled in dragon’s fire before.” (This phrase specifically would be something like ‘I did some experimenting in college’ but the reference to dragon’s fire/breath would mean lgbt+)

“He wears a crown of fire lilies.” (lgbt+)

Even before the hundred year war they were one of the more intolerant of the nations (based on the Kyoshi novels) and they probably only got worse during the hundred year war. I’m sure they would’ve come up with more slang by the time we get to Korra’s time but I’m out of ideas for the Fire Nation.

Air Nomads:

As they are totally open and accepting to all genders and sexualities they wouldn’t feel the need for coming up with specific labels, let alone weird secret codes and slang. When nomads begin exploring the world and start to learn about the other nation’s ideologies and slang and everything they’re always confused but respects the other nation’s traditions and cultures.

bonus

Swamp benders:

Even more open about gender and sexuality than Kyoshi Islanders. They’re super casual and blunt about it without being disrespectful but also not trying to be respectful because why would anyone be disrespectful about this? There’s a polycule consisting of roughly ten people who all connected through an asexual tribe member that each member of the polycule has a qpr with. Darryl over there is interested in folks of all sorts. His spouse is all the genders. Not to be confused with Jim over there who is none of the genders. Not to be confused with Junjun who is the third gender… (etc)

I didn’t do a big deep dive into each nation’s culture and history. This is just from the top of my head and is just for fun. Let me know if you guys have any other ideas!

[cookinguptales]

So… I’ve been turning all this over in my head since last night, and I wanted to make a post about vampiric transformation as sex, and how it’s being used in wwdits as a metaphor for sexual repression, sexual freedom, virginity, and cuckolding.

Before I even get into the obvious metaphors about virginity and cuckolding, I think we need to talk about the elephant in the room. Guillermo’s sexual repression and how that’s come to find an outlet in his vampiric longing.

Guillermo is highly repressed, sexually speaking, but I don’t think he’s asexual. He’s shown interest in sex several times, but in an uncomfortable “this can’t be for me yet” kind of way. He was clearly raised Catholic and has internalized a lot of that shame re: sex, especially gay sex. He wants intimacy, but he’s also internalized the idea that wanting these things is dangerous and shameful.

But… the vampiric world seems to symbolize all the things that Guillermo wants but cannot have. He wants to be strong, powerful, attractive, and sexually liberated. As much as their openness about sex embarrasses him, there’s a certain longing there, too. He didn’t just want to be handsome as a vampire — he explicitly used the word “sexy.”

A vampiric Guillermo is a version of Guillermo that gets to have sex. Loudly, proudly, and without shame. It’s a version of him that is wanted, that wants, and who gets to have the precise kind of intimacy he's always craved.

Now, how much Guillermo has actually done sexually is still up for a lot of debate in fandom, but I think that’s kind of immaterial. For most of the show, Guillermo clearly wasn’t having the kind of intimacy that he wanted to be having, and he only started to even begin to allow himself to seriously consider all that in s4, when he got a boyfriend and came out to his family.

As being gay and wanting to be a vampire. 

Guillermo is finally starting to own both his homosexuality and his vampiric life, and that means he’s finally starting to explore sex.

Now… At the end of s4, I talked about how Guillermo going to Derek in the finale had the air of a person who’d been fantasizing about losing their virginity in a certain way all their life — but then they finally give up on those dreams and hire a sex worker instead. There’s a resignation there in Guillermo that he couldn’t get it “the old-fashioned way,” he’s disappointed and jaded when it comes to intimate relationships, and now he’s tired of waiting for love and just wants a business transaction.

I wasn’t quite expecting for them to push that metaphor even more in s5! The money aspect was almost forgotten (Did… Derek even take the money? Why is he still cleaning toilets?) but the scene with Derek biting Guillermo was clearly a metaphorical virginity scene.

Guillermo’s nervous eagerness, his growing realization that this wasn’t actually the way he wanted it to happen. Asking Derek if he’d ever done this before and figuring out if he was “ready.” Taking off his clothes (that his grandmother got for him, even, that’s a whole meta post right THERE) and trying to make the vibe “right.” His insistence that though Nandor had never done this for him, they still had a caring and intimate relationship.

But… it was also a metaphor for bad sex. Many people lose their virginity in a way they don’t find satisfying, and Guillermo definitely seems to fall in this category. It was awkward, it was bloody, it hurt, his partner didn’t listen to him, they weren’t on the same wavelength, they didn’t connect, there was no emotional bond, and most importantly, he didn’t feel changed.

Like a lot of people do, Guillermo thought losing his virginity would change him. He’d be cooler, sexier, more powerful. His station in life would change. He’d become an adult his ideal form. But he’s still just Guillermo.

As he told Laszlo, as soon as he did it, he regretted it. He immediately knew that he’d been right, that this wasn’t the way he wanted to do it. He wanted to do it with someone experienced who loved and cared about him, who listened to him, and he wanted that person to be Nandor. But he wasn’t patient, he paid an inexperienced acquaintance for a one-night-stand instead, and he was left feeling deeply unfulfilled.

Most upsettingly, he immediately discovered that, like virginity, you can’t lose it twice. He can’t just have a do-over with Nandor now. He’s given something up that he can’t give to anyone else, and he’s going to have to live with the consequences.

Because like sex for humans, transformation has social implications in the vampire world. It can only be done in very specific situations. Guillermo seems to have grown up in a human world where sex should only be happening within a heterosexual marriage, and now he’s finding that in the vampire world, transformation is only supposed to happen between a master and familiar currently in a contractual bond.

So… him going to Derek and finding “outlet” in another relationship, so to speak, is effectively vampirically cuckolding Nandor. He’s given that honor to another vampire, which Nandor seems to find both vampirically humiliating and personally hurtful. It would in fact hurt him so badly that he would probably not survive it, in Laszlo’s words.

(There’s also definitely an element of an abusive “if I can’t have you, no one can” vibe in Nandor’s threat to kill Guillermo and then himself if Guillermo got what he needed from another vampire, but since when have we ever liked them well-adjusted?)

Guillermo is realizing that, as much as he’s been thinking of this in sexual terms, so have the vampires. He thought he was the only one who thought it was a big deal. He thought he was the only one placing intimacy and partnership and loyalty into this event. But now he’s realizing that as much as it meant to him, it might have even been a bigger thing for Nandor.

For Guillermo, vampirism-as-sex represents the idealized transformational aspects of losing your virginity. He’d built up this big event in his mind that represented his intimate bond with Nandor, he’d built up this idea that the event would change him, would make him better, would make him free. But he’s finding, like many first-timers do, that sometimes it’s not transformational. It’s just awkward and disappointing and the only thing that’s changed is that you ache in the morning.

He still doesn’t have the intimacy he wanted. He still doesn’t have the ability to be loudly himself. He still hasn’t been able to fully own his sexuality and ask for what he wants. He wasn’t ready. He didn’t enjoy it. He regrets it.

He also regrets it because now he knows it will hurt Nandor and the relationship they’ve built. Because for Nandor, vampirism-as-sex represents the societal aspects of sex. The rules people follow. The societal humiliation you feel if you’re cuckolded. The personal agony you feel when you’re cheated on. The sense that your home is broken if your partner goes to find satisfaction with someone else.

Guillermo, who has had to deal with societal disapproval of his desired type of sex in the human world his whole life, was viewing vampiric transformation as a way to be free of all that. The shame and the repression and the societal penalties for being himself.

But he’s just found himself in a mess of new rules, hasn’t he? Different culture, same struggle. And while the vampiric world has always symbolized a sexual liberation that both repulses and attracts Guillermo, he clearly doesn’t have as much freedom here as he thought.

So… to sum up, Guillermo always kind of thought of transformation as losing his virginity. He associated vampirism with sex, and he thought this would be his entrance into the sexual world. He wanted to have an intimate experience with Nandor, but eventually gave up on that and decided to pay for it — and then immediately regretted it, both because he found it personally dissatisfying and because it came as a betrayal to the man he loves.

The problem is that he thought he was the only person thinking of it as sex — he didn’t realize that Nandor does, too, just in a very different way.

Nandor was also thinking of vampiric transformation as this special act, and one that belongs only to him as Guillermo’s master/partner. He was thinking of it in intimate terms, but also in societal partnership terms. He’s thinking of his household, while Guillermo was thinking of things on more individualistic terms.

If only they’d both talked about all this shit even once. :’)

But that’s not how we do things here in Staten Island!!! We just long for things ineffectively, keep secrets, and fuck everything up!

(There’s also a whole thing here about how Nandor wasn’t keeping his side of the relationship bargain and that’s why Guillermo looked elsewhere in a moment of weakness, but I guess that’s probably a separate post. This is long enough already.)

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Kill Your Darlings

a depressed author struggling to finish the last book in her bestselling fantasy series lucid dreams into the protagonist in the midst of the narrative and can't get out

she uses her omniscient knowledge to help them win the war and survive, despite not having any of her protagonist's magic powers - but when she starts to change things she can’t predict, and starts to forget her life before, things get more and more chaotic

explores mental health & suicidal ideation

ace MC

[what-even-is-thiss]

I’ve been on one date in my entire life and we got coffee and walked around the neighborhood just talking about our lives. We were both transmasc, both asexual, looking to get started in life. I texted him merry Christmas on Christmas eve and he said “You too, man.” and I never got another reply again.

What a strange thing. A strange moment. To find someone whose world aligns with yours so cleanly to have such a nice evening and then they just never call you again. It would probably mean less if I’ve had a hundred dates in my life but I’ve just had the one. So it’s the only one that there is to haunt me.

That was two years ago. I wonder how he’s doing now. If that thing with his job worked out. I wonder who he wonders about. I wonder if I would’ve liked him still if we’d had a second date. If we would’ve kissed or hugged, because we didn’t get to it on the first one. I’ll never know. I shouldn’t wonder, but he’s the only one I have to wonder about because his eyes were brown right next to my blue ones. Same height as me. Binder poking out from under his shirt. Vaping cotton candy out into the wind. I’m sure it meant almost nothing in the grand scheme of things but again, I’ve got limited things to dwell on.

[blackenedsnow]

Hello! Feel free to ignore this if you can't or wouldn't like to write it!

If it's not any trouble, could I request an Arthur Morgan x Asexual!Reader thing (one shot or headcanons, whatever fits better and/or is easier!), where there's like, mutual pining, but the reader speaks about their aversion to sex and lack of that sort of attraction, and how they think they're just never gonna have a meaningful romantic relationship because of this? Been feeling discouraged and sad about this, so yeah lmao.

And if the reader could be buff, it'd be awesome (no, I am not buff yet, but I will use this as inspiration to get there lol.

Anyways, tysm for taking the time to read this! Have a lovely day/night/afternoon!

heart stronger than flesh

WARNING: None

PAIRING: Arthur Morgan x Asexual! Reader

NOTE: I hope this gave you the encouragement you were looking for! Arthur's got your back, and so do I. You're going to reach those buff goals, one step at a time. Stay strong and know you're worthy of all the love and care in the world! Thank you so much for requesting this. Remember that love comes in many forms, and you deserve it as you are.

SUMMARY: Arthur has always admired you—your strength, your sharp wit, the way you stand tall in the middle of this messy world. He knows there’s something unspoken between you two, but neither of you has dared to name it. That is, until one evening when you finally confront your fears about the future.

The camp was quiet tonight, only the crackling of the fire filling the air as the rest of the gang slowly drifted off to sleep. You sat a little ways from the fire, resting on a fallen log, your muscles tense from the long day. Arthur sat nearby, the warmth of the firelight casting flickering shadows over his face as he quietly cleaned his gun. His usual frown softened whenever his eyes flickered your way, though he was trying to act like he wasn’t paying too much attention to you.

It had been this way for a while now. The unspoken tension between you two simmered just beneath the surface—an unacknowledged pining that neither of you knew how to handle. You weren’t blind to how he looked at you, especially after all the times you’d ridden into town together, his eyes lingering on the way your biceps flexed when you pulled the reins. He was always good at keeping it hidden, though, his cowboy façade of stoicism remaining intact. But tonight felt different. He kept glancing over at you more often than usual, his jaw clenched a little tighter.

You sighed and stretched your arms above your head, feeling your muscles strain under your skin. Even in the dim light, your physique was obvious—strong arms and broad shoulders earned through days of hard work and rough living. You were proud of the strength you'd built, but something else gnawed at you. The weight in your chest wasn’t from exhaustion.

You tried to brush the thought aside, but it came creeping back, like it always did.

Arthur noticed the shift in your expression. He finally broke the silence, his voice low and gravelly. “You alright?”

You hesitated, your fingers idly picking at the worn fabric of your pants. “Yeah. Just… got a lot on my mind, I guess.”

He nodded, putting down his gun and giving you his full attention now. He was quiet for a moment, waiting for you to speak. His eyes were soft, his usual guarded expression slipping as he looked at you with concern.

You shifted on the log, feeling the words at the back of your throat, but they were hard to spit out. How could you explain it? You weren’t shy about being tough, about fighting back against the world, but this? This was something different. Something more vulnerable.

“Arthur…” you started, not looking at him directly. “You ever… feel like you're not ever gonna have what other folks have? Like, love… romance?” You paused, feeling the knot in your stomach tighten. “I mean, I see people, how they are with each other. But for me… I don’t feel the same way they do.”

Arthur frowned slightly, not sure where you were going with this yet. “What do you mean?”

You swallowed hard, your hands tightening into fists in your lap. “I don’t… I don’t want the same things as most people. I don’t want—” You stopped, heart pounding, before forcing yourself to continue. “I don’t want sex, Arthur. I never have. Never felt that way. And it makes me feel like… like I'm gonna be enough. Not for anyone.”

Arthur was silent for a moment, his gaze fixed on you, but there was no judgment in his eyes. Just understanding, like he was listening to every word you said with more focus than he gave most things in this world.

You let out a shaky breath. “I’ve been thinkin’ about it for a while now. About... us. I know there’s… something between us, but I’m scared it’ll never work because I can’t give you what most people expect in a relationship. Hell, I don’t even know if it’s fair to you.”

Arthur finally spoke, his voice low and calm. “You really think that’s all there is to love? To wantin’ someone?”

You blinked at him, surprised by his question.

“I’m serious,” he said, shifting forward slightly, his elbows resting on his knees as he leaned toward you. “You think I’m with you—care about you—just ‘cause of what I could get outta you physically?” He shook his head. “It ain’t like that. Not for me.”

You stared at him, unsure of what to say.

“I don’t care about that,” he continued. “Hell, I’ve been around enough folks to know what really matters. I care about *you*. I care about the way you carry yourself, the way you look after the people you care about, the way you get stronger every damn day.” His eyes softened even more. “You think I ain’t noticed how damn strong you’ve gotten, how you keep pushin’ yourself?”

Your heart skipped a beat as he spoke, and a warmth spread through your chest at his words. You had always prided yourself on your strength, but hearing it from him—hearing how he noticed and appreciated it—meant more than you could have expected.

“I’ve felt it too,” he admitted, his voice dropping to a rough whisper. “Somethin’ between us. I ain’t gonna pretend I know all the answers, but I know I care about you. And I don’t need anything else but you by my side.”

It was hard with the weight of your fears crashing into the relief his words brought.

Arthur, ever perceptive, reached out slowly, placing a calloused hand on your knee. It was a gentle touch—so different from the hardened man you were used to seeing in him.

“I ain’t here to push you,” he said softly. “You don’t ever have to be anything you’re not. I don’t expect you to change, and I sure as hell don’t think you’re any less for feelin’ the way you do.” He hesitated, squeezing your knee gently. “You’re more than enough. I promise you that.”

You let out a shaky laugh, wiping your eyes quickly. “Arthur, I… I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t gotta say anything,” he murmured, his thumb brushing lightly over your skin. “Just know that you mean somethin’ to me. And I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

For the first time in a long while, the tight knot in your chest started to loosen. You weren’t used to feeling this kind of reassurance, and yet, here was Arthur Morgan—someone as rough as the life you both led—telling you that you were enough just as you were.

You looked down at his hand on your knee, then back up into his eyes. “Thank you,” you whispered.

He smiled—just a small, fleeting thing, but it was real. “Anytime.”

The two of you sat there for a while longer, the fire crackling softly beside you, the night quiet and peaceful for once. And in that stillness, you felt a sense of calm settle in your bones.

You were strong—physically and emotionally. And with Arthur by your side, maybe you didn’t have to carry that weight alone.

[dunmeshi-darlings]

"you cant ship izutsumi with anyone in the cast she is a child!!"

or

"you cant ship izutsumi with anyone she is canon aro/ace!"

Firstly, Its fiction and people can do whatever they want in fiction it does not matter.

But also, this just isnt correct? izutsumi is considered an adult in the dungeon meshi world with multiple sources proving this.

Here We have the Race bio for teh tall-men race, here it lists ever bit of information about tall men from where they are most common, to hieghts, notable tall-men characters including our favorite cat girl izutsumi.

Here we see that the age of maturity is specifically listed as 16 years of age. That at 16 years old in dungeon meshi, Tall-men are considered adults. Maybe this isnt good enough proof for you, well thats fine the words "age of maturity" are a bit vague. However we have this bit of dialogue between Laios, Chilchuck, And Marcille

Laios Specifically uses the word "adult" Because thats what it is, At 16 the Tall-Men are Adults. Adults who can Do adult things like Join the army, Go out and live on their own, Look for Love and Romance and sexual relationships. Want more proof of that? i can do that

Here we see that Chilchucks daughters Plan to try and seduce and romance Laios, Wanting to engage in a relationship with this new king. As for the ages? Chilchucks daughters are all between 14-16

Puckpatti is the youngest at 14

Flertom is the middle child at 16

And finally meijack who is also 16, however she must be older than flertom as she is referred to as "big sis".

As for laios? We know he is 26 years old.

So here we have two half foots who are 14 and 16 wanting to try and seduce King laios, who is 26 years old. A full 10+ year age gap between them, but it doesnt matter because as Flertom herself says

"But wont it embaras you, dad? To have three ADULT daughters who are unmarried?"

She literally says adult, because thats what chilchucks daughters are, they are adults because they fall into the age of maturity for half foots. (which is stated here)

So because they are at least 14, they are considered an adult and can try and romance king laios, a man who is 26 years old and chilchuck isnt upset at that because they are adult women (just upset that its laios of all people)

So if Chilchucks daughters at ages 14-16 are called adults, The half foot age of maturity is listed as 14, and they call THEMSELVES adults, and are shown showing romantic interest with a 26 year old man. Its safe to say that they are adults in every sense of the word, meaning that age of maturity is when the individual of that race is considered an adult, as for izutsumi?

She is listed as 17 years old, a full year past the age of maturity for Tall-men. Aka, a full year past when a tall-man is considered an adult, therefore by all the rules of the dungeon meshi world she is an adult.

As for the Aro/ace part? there is no specific wording for it besides these parts in the succubus arc

Here we see her say "i dont have a type or anything that im attracted to, so ill be fine."

Here we see the succubus take the form of izutsumis mother (or her supposed idea of her)

As somebody who is asexual (yes little lore drop about yours truly, i am actually ace myself) this doesnt strike me as her being asexual. That isnt to say you cant headcanon her as ace, thats your right and i fully support that especially being ace myself. But that doesnt make it canon though.

I personally headcanon her as demisexual, but i know that also isnt canon. and i dont want to try and claim it is.

[meeks-just-wants-to-scroll]

Do I ship your Bill/Javier/Micah? No? Do I like rarepairs and think they are awesome? Yes, so QUESTIONS FOR YOU BECAUSE I KNOW THE RAREPAIR TRENCHES ARE HARD TO LIVE IN:

What is your fav part about their story? How do you think they realised they all liked one another? Do you think they go on dates?

Thank you!! Yes, the life of a rarepair shipper is rough but it isn’t the trenches. It’s more like a very boring white box. There are no haters here (I haven’t experienced any), but neither is there enough fans to make content. And so it is just me wagging the flag for F of a Feather.

I think I have already answered questions like these in detail before so I’ll make these briefer. I’m still answering them just in-case my ideas have changed since I last spoke.

Fave part about their story?:

They don’t have a lot of story since I mostly drew this ship from thin air and loosely pieces together interpretations of scenes. Scenes that inspired the ship are:

- Javier pinning Bill with a knife to his neck (camp interaction)

- Micah and Javier drunk and laughing (Camp)

- Micah, Bill, and Javier during the entirety of Guarma: I especially like Bill helping Javier get around. Also Micah abandoning Javier is so angsty oh man…

- Javier getting Arthur to help save Bill from bounty hunters (random event).

- Micah making fun of Javier being effeminate + Javier punching Micah (campfire)

- Javier and Micah whispering to each other, then laughing and shaking hands during Chapter 6 (camp).

- MICAH FUCKING HITTING ON BILL??? (Missable dialogue in the over world before the mission ‘a short walk in a pretty town.’)

- The preamble cutscene at the start of ‘The Delights of Van Horn’ with Micah and Bill.

- Bill and Micah’s bickering dynamic in the optional ‘Rob A Stagecoach’ mission with Micah in Chapter 4.

- and more I am sure…

I like how none of the three of them were on the same page by chapter 6, hence them all splitting. Bill and Javier ran away together from Dutch and Micah by the end of chapter 6. I haven’t played rdr1 so I can’t say much in detail, but I hear Javier and Bill still seem to be amicable by that time which is another reason I feel they could have had some connection pre rdr1.

How did they realize they all like each other?:

I think they were all cheaters and realized they cheated on each other with the same people /j

The more serious response is that Bill and Micah were the first to become a situationship because both are closeted gay/bi men and wanted their dicks wet.

Javier and Micah had an odd amicability that only existed when both were drunk. Drunk micah is far more tolerable and more willing to divulge personal details or talk about his feelings. (Drunk bill and micah are also a hoot.) while drunk, Javier and micah have some gay stares and touches.

Bill and Javier is harder to box into a dynamic label. Javier tolerates Bill’s asshole behavior and sometimes doesn’t have the energy for him, but they bond over their loyalty to Dutch and both being hard workers. Bill appreciates Javier to the point of being a drunken fan girl at times. Javier can see there is a good man within Bill, he’s just frustrated with all the flaws that cloud that from coming out.

Uh and then they all individually got drunk and emotional and wanted to show their appreciation for each other because they’re all friends (I guess) and they don’t know how else to show that than making out hot and wet.

Meek’s headcanons ⭐️: Javier is asexual /aromantic spectrum and doesn’t have interest in being anything official with anyone. Micah is sexual but aromantic-spectrum and non-monogamous; he hates the idea of being an exclusive partner to anyone (he sees it just as repeated actions, not that those repeated actions mean anything). And Bill is a conflicted Monogomous gay man who wants to have the closest thing to a sexual gay relationship.

So… none of them are very compatible in the long run. They just have periodic moments of being what could be considered “on and off situationship bros.”

Do they go on dates?:

No, not really.

- Javier isn’t that interested in sex (at most he used it to shut Micah or Bill up, but Javier doesn’t get a whole lot out of it). Javier’s love language is quality time and showing his interests in the form of music and fishing (among other activities and topics). Micah has no interest in these things. Bill may listen to Javier’s music but can provide no deep conversations (at least, not deep enough to be stimulating for Javier).

- micah is so vindictive on relationships that it’s hard to tell if he is going to be agony to be around or if he’s going to be an okay person. He has near no interest in anyone else’s lives so a date with him would be the most impersonal and dismissive conversations.

- bill is not a dumb ass, he is the one person who might actually want to go on dates. Issue is he can’t execute complex date ideas without messing up and immediately calling it quits (because he anticipates everyone to laugh at him and hold it over his head for being a fuck up). His go to attempt is to: “Hey! Come over here and have some drinks with me.” Those brief moments of skin grazing and tipsy smiles means a lot to Bill. Javier and Bill could maybe go on a date, but it might be emotionally exhausting for Javier to spend the entire time trying to coax Bill to relax and open his shell.

- as a triad, they don’t go on dates. Closest thing is when they somehow roll the dice and they all get assigned a mission together. It’s rarely just the three of them because their dynamics clash so heavily.

Ughhhh idk how special any of this is. This really is just me repeating my previous posts. I love the ship because they are so dysfunctional. They are the polycule that ruins the polyamory party

[lunarw0rks]

Hiii, I've absolutely devoured most of your fics and I absolutely LOVE your writing style ♡♡♡ could you do an established relationship fiction with Ghost? Y/n is sort of asexual, so sometimes even if she's not in the mood herself, she just likes to watch Simon get himself off (maybe multiple rounds!!!)? Nsfw with lots of fluff??? ♡

warning(s): nsfw (18+), established relationship, fluff/smut, (m.) masturbation, asexual!fem!reader

A HELPING HAND | SIMON RILEY

it's no secret that simon's relationship with intimacy is complicated.

but so is yours, and it makes for a perfect pair... sometimes. tonight was not one of those nights.

"are you alright?" you ask, glancing up from the book in your hands.

he hasn't stopped fidgeting, and he won't. sit. down. it's starting to drive you nuts. but frankly, for such a calm man to get jittery — something was up.

it was random, his sudden urge for intimacy. however, it was clear you were relaxing, in your own little world. he didn't want to soil that. it had been weeks since you two had sex — which was usually never a problem, but tonight was especially difficult for Simon to stifle.

"...'m fine," now he's rearranging the desktop, only sitting down in the desk chair briefly as a means of distraction. his pants were painfully tight by this point.

"simon... simon." you interrupt his rambles, recognizing that familiar shift he's doing in the seat. how one hand has remained on his inner thigh for several minutes. "if you want something, all you need to do is ask, you know that, right?"

the swivel chair comes to a stop when it faces you, but he's still stiff in his posture. "not that kind of favor, love." he says, looking awfully meek for someone with such conviction any other time.

you were only teasing him before. but now you really had an answer — the root of his not-so-little problem, which resided in boxers that are currently a size too small.

though you weren't feeling any urges of your own arise, there was fun to be had in watching him. it wouldn't have been the first time, either. "why don't i watch you again?"

there was no sense in being coy like he was the first time you proposed the idea. it wasn't as awkward as you thought it'd be. in fact, that night you found the sight quite arousing... without acting feeling aroused at that moment. besides, it made the reward for later twice as satisfying — whether it be weeks, or months before you have the desire to reciprocate again.

"you're sure about this?" his movements went still as if waiting on your permission to start palming his thigh again.

with a small smile, you tossed your book aside and let it land somewhere out of sight on the bed. still, you insisted, "deadly serious, si. it doesn't bother me."

he clicked his tongue and nodded to himself, slouching a bit in the chair to unbuckle his belt. the metal clinked as he shimmed with it, eventually setting the accessory on the desk behind him. once the jeans were loosened, you could truly see the pressure of his hardened length — begging to be sprung free.

simon shifted his hips until only his jeans were pulled down a bit. next, he peeled back the waistband of his ebony briefs, cock slumping against his tone stomach. tip ruddy and oozing pre-cum, and his stomach heaved a bit from the sensation of having his problem released from the confines of clothing.

thick, calloused hands grasped his erection, slouching forward to spit on it. the translucent string rolled down his shaft, going the pattern of the prominent veins along its sides. a truly lude image to witness; tempting, even, if you were truly in the mood.

instead, it was motivation enough for another time.

manspreading in the desk chair, he continued to work his cock. faint, wet clicks of the lubricant echoing through the bedroom. it didn't help how quiet simon naturally was. but where was the fun in this, if not putting on some sort of show for you?

he let a few noises slip, huffing through his nostrils audibly and letting out small grunts the faster you went. you lay back against the plush bed, biting back feelings of fluster that came whether aroused or not. his moans were rare and cherished — and you happened to be one of the few souls lucky enough to hear them.

you folded your arms and watched intently, gnawing on your bottom lip. not being aroused didn't mean you weren't going to ogle him, especially when all hot and bothered.

his hand moved hastily, its large size swallowing his length, covering more surface area than yours ever could. you'd catch his hips bucking in the seat while he maintained eye contact — unless they drooped shut when his fingers brushed against his sensitive slit. the same way he shuttered when you skimmed your tongue along it many times, except he had the luxury of not getting 'scolded' for it.

now he's exposed his weak points. you now knew he savored it when you teased your tongue there.

especially when he'd gotten so twitchy with his own thumb caressing. well, now you've taken note to tease him that way again, no matter the repercussions.

"need to— fuck— touch you," his speech skipped like a scratched CD, the strokes growing sloppier and more desirous. he was close; so fucking close.

you nod your head, watching him stand to his feet. as simon walks over, he slows his roll a bit, enough to ensure he won't spill right then and there. you remain in the same position, except for the hand you place on his waist, running your palm up and down his abdomen to give him for stimulation.

he stands beside the bed, his clean hand reaching out. his thumb brushes against your lip, giving your bottom one a slight drag — then slipping between them and running along your gums, allowing you to tongue along his finger like you would his cock.

the sticky, gummy texture of your mouth — like that of your entrance clenching around him. and your caress, like you always did when he hit spots deep inside. your small contributions allowed his imagination to do the rest of the heavy lifting.

you palmed his abs, maintaining eye contact to give him every bit of this otherwise touchless act. but your hand along his stomach was enough, as was playing with your mouth; enough to push him turbulently over that edge.

a string of curses poured from simon's lips, just like the globs of cum that followed quickly after. into his palm, he released his load, hips grinding against nothing until the overwhelming sensations ceased. his finger removed from your mouth with a pop, before he sped to the bathroom to wipe himself off.

a few moments later, he returned, finding you in the same position. it was quite a show, to put it lightly; not one you'll forget any time soon, either.

instead of standing like before, he knelt in front of the bed, sitting between your legs with his neck craned to look up at you. "that was alrigh' with you?" he asks again as if the 'damage' wasn't already done.

you nodded again, reassuring him once more, "of course, si. it doesn't bother me. and it's... a sight to see." you attempt a wink but look more like you're trying to get something out of your eye.

he scoffs at your attempt, taking both your hands — while simon's are icy and freshly smelling of the lavender soap in the washroom. despite your humor, it means a lot to be reassured by you. "christ, you are unbelievable, lovie. y'know tha'?" he teases, giving each of your knuckles a buss.

"i know it," you sneer, squirming slightly from the pecks. "but i still won't forget tonight. it'll keep me warm when you're away."

his brow cocks, and then comes a half-awkward chuckle. "you're a bloody tease, but i'm guessing you know that too, don't you? and a proper smart mouth."

you retort the same, having keen knowledge of how to press his fragile buttons. "what are you going to do? get the soap?"

"might have to." simon replies with faux sternness, even while speaking through a warm smile, the rough pads of his thumbs still rubbing your knuckles.

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