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John summing up the thoughts of every autistic person in the world here. I love him.

Ludwig - SE01 E01

“I-I can’t do this Lucy. I don’t know how anybody can. I don’t know how James ever did.”

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Might as well post my les mis tweets here instead of letting them collect dust on twitter lol

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Enjolras thinks Grantaire doesn't care about France because he doesn't believe in anything, but Grantaire doesn't care about France because he knows France doesn't care about Enjolras.

Grantaire believes in Enjolras, and so he can never believe in France.

And that hurts a lot.

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There's such a fine balance between Scorpius knowing that Delphi can't be trusted but not being able to explain why, and also distrusting her simply because he's afraid she will take Albus away from him.

And it's something that is so interesting to look at.

Because, for the longest time, it's always been Albus and Scorpius. And he wants to like Delphi because Albus does, but he also doesn't trust her. And he doesn't want to be pushed out.

The emotional turmoil that he would have surrounding that isn't talked about enough.

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I will never stop thinking about Scorpius Malfoy wanting to prove to the world that he isn't a bad person like everyone thinks his parents were, and I can't stop thinking about Albus Severus Potter wanting to prove to the world that he doesn't have to be a hero like his dad was.

And I can't stop thinking about them both finding one another and connecting over the shared experience of trying to prove to the world that they are their own people, trying to prove to the world that they're more than who their parents are.

Albus and Scorpius needed to meet because they needed each other.

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I have seen a lot of Enjolras and Grantaire pairings over the years, but none have ever seemed more like boyfriends than James D. Gish and Connor Jones on the Les Misérables Arena Spectacular tour, and I need to talk about it.

James' Enjolras is so confident and is so committed to the revolution, but he is also very human and very soft with Grantaire and Gavroche. Througout the show they are seen together like a little family unit, and you can see that Enjolras cares for them both. He's conflicted throughout the show, and is very protective over them both.

Connor's Grantaire (and I say this every time I see him) is another level - he is so brick accurate and he portrays Grantaire with so much care. He's the usual drunken R, but he is so gentle and he feels things so deeply. He's anxious, and emotive and cynical, but he wears a mask and pretends to be okay. He's so aware of everything going on and he cares about his friends. And he cares about Gavroche; he's like the little brother that he never had. And he is so enamoured with Enjolras - he doesn't take his eyes off him for more than 2 minutes the whole time they're on stage. Connor Jones Grantaire will always be my favourite.

During Look Down, James' Enjolras is so confident. You can see how much the cause matters to him, and you really believe in him. And he's so human in Red & Black - he's clearly a little bit nervous, but when he looks to Grantaire and sees that he is smiling at him, he gets a boost of confidence. It's really sweet, and I've never seen that before. When he sings "don't let the wine go to your brains", he's poking fun at Grantaire and offers him a cheeky smile, which makes Grantaire laugh too.

Connor's Grantaire holds his wine bottle up to the roof in reply, laughing, and is reprimanded by another student. He, playfully, stands to attention and listens to Enjolras again following that. He goes towards Enjolras once he finishes singing, but immediately stops when Marius walks in and takes to teasing him. Enjolras speaks to the other students and intervenes before they can tell Grantaire off and tells them he will sort it. But he can't help himself but laugh at him when he's teasing Marius. He pulls himself together and continues with the song, keeping his eyes on Grantaire to make sure he's listening and he looks so proud of himself when he realises he's getting through to him.

Until Grantaire and Marius start up again, and then he looks so defeated but, again, can't help but smile. He's rolling his eyes but he's laughing because he just can't help it when he's watching Grantaire. It was so sweet.

It really was as if he was torn between upsetting Grantaire, and upsetting the rest of the Amis. And it worked really well. He was so relieved at the end of the song when Grantaire stopped joking around. He verbally said "YES" when Grantaire said "give me brandy on my breath and I'll breathe them all to death".

THESE TWO. They are such boyfriends.

Grantaire looks so concerned when Gavroche tells the Amis that Lamarque has died, and he runs straight over to him to make sure he's safe as the students prepare. He takes such a big drink of his wine and forces a smile onto his face for Enjolras. Enjolras constantly looks at Grantaire during the song, and Grantaire is doing the same but with so much love and pride in his eyes. James' Enjolras is so confident in what he believes in, but he is so soft with Grantaire and I really love that choice. While Grantaire stands with Gavroche, Enjolras is constantly seen walking over to them both and they really do seem like a little family. 

As Grantaire sings "let's give them a screwing they'll never forget", Enjolras looked at him with so much pride and smiled so wide once the words processed in his mind. 

After Èponine died, Enjolras was looking behind himself like a lost puppy and Grantaire stumbled forward and offered him his hand with so much desperation to try and help the man he loves. But Enjolras pulled away from the hold when Valjean clambered onto the barricade, leaving Grantaire holding his arm out. Gavroche gave him a little nudge but R looked so broken and upset. He literally growled the "a volunteer like you" line through gritted teeth.

After Enjolras shoots down his "so the war is won" line, he shakes his head and rolls his eyes as he walks to the back of the stage. It's at this point that you can see that Grantaire is really understanding that they're all going to die. He drinks some more and sits with Gavroche as Valjean and Javert have their confrontation.

At the start of Drink With Me, Grantaire stumbles (again) to the front of the stage, looking around at his friends and taking in what they're saying. He holds his arms up and then a few of the Amis stand up and storm towards him as he sings his part (with such a broken voice). But before they can get to him, Enjolras pulls them back and pushes them away from Grantaire, and they both look at each other on the "will the world remember you when you fall?" line, with Enjolras placing a comforting hand on Grantaire's shoulder.

But Grantaire pushes him away in his hurt and frustration, and Enjolras looks so concerned and upset. He looks around at the other students to see whether they're all watching too before just staring at R with so much sadness. He tries again to comfort him, putting both of his hands on his shoulders and leading him away as Gavroche runs up to them and throws his arms around him.

AND THE LOOK ON ENJOLRAS' FACE. OH MY GOD. IT SAID SO MUCH.

He wanted so much to be the one to hug Grantaire, you could tell. He was trying so hard not to cry, and it was gut-wrenching. He looked so sad, and so broken, and let out such an exasperated breath (he looked like he was going to have a panic attack, I'm not exaggerating) before forcing a smile onto his face for the other students.

The death scene is staged a little differently in the Arena Spectacular, but Grantaire still holds Gavroche and he still looks around for Enjolras and Enjolras gives him a small nod before they're both killed (do you permit it? vibes).

During Empty Chairs at Empty Tables, Enjolras, Grantaire and Gavroche stand together at the top of the stage like the little family that they are, and are together at the end for the finale too.

In conclusion, I love them, your honour. James D. Gish and Connor Jones will go down in history for their ExR. I hope we get an official recording with this cast, or I hope they do a stint in London in the future.

They ARE Enjoltaire.

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Aroace Edmund and Lucy?????

Listen. I know that its just a funny quip in a movie that repeatedly forgot that the Pevensies are actually twenty-something year olds in the bodies of children, but, if I can use the writers' sloppiness for my own gains, then I will.

Canon fact: the pevensies spent at least 15 years in narnia. Therefore Lucy was at least 25, and Edmund at least 26 when they came back, and 26/27 by the time of Prince Caspian. Also a fact: they retained all their memories of adulthood.

"I'm sure when I'm older I'll understand." Lucy, by this stage you've lived 26 years of life. If you dont understand yet, I dont think you ever will. The above is a classic line that you might get from aroace who hasn't cottoned on yet to the fact that theyre aroace, and is still waiting for all the mythical "feelings" that others talk of to kick in. I was once that 26 year old oblivious ace myself.

"I'm older and I dont think I want to understand." Classic line you might hear from an aroace who's accustomed to the lack of all those mythical "feelings" that others speak of, and is perfectly content without them, and wouldn't change it if he could. I'm that ace now.

Further supporting evidence: there is no mention of romance for either character in the books. Susan gets a love interest in the Horse and His Boy, but even with Archenland and Calormen full of potential suitors, theres not a word of interest on Ed or Lucy's behalf.

Aroace younger Pevensie siblings.

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Ryan Kopel as Evan Hansen is one of the most incredible casting choices made in the world of theatre, and I need to talk about it.

Before I start, I want to preface by saying that I understand that Evan is a complex autistic-coded character. That being said, though, I really do see parts of myself in his character ... and especially in Ryan's portrayal of him. As someone that also has pretty severe anxiety and is autistic, it was really refreshing to see someone similar to myself, and my struggles, on the stage played with so much care and delicacy.

Ryan's Evan stims, he walks on his toes, he struggles with eye contact, he stutters over his words, he doesn't pick up on Jared's jokes and he looks visibly lost whenever he can't think of the right thing to say (or anything to say). And the thing that I found most interesting about his portrayal was the mask that he gave Evan whenever he spoke to the Murphys. He forced himself to speak even when he was struggling, and his voice would change to a deeper, more socially acceptable tone. His posture would change entirely, his stimming would become more subtle (little tugs at his shirt or strokes of his fingers) and he'd appear more confident, even though we, as the audience, know that he isn't.

Masking is something that I rarely see portrayed right, but Ryan as Evan did it so well. And I cannot get over it. I will not get over it.

And then there's the overstimulation that we see Evan Hansen go through: he puts his hands up over his ears, with his eyes darting around the room for an escape while bouncing on his toes and flailing around. His 'Words Fail' was on a whole other planet - the desperation in his voice and the genuine pain as he screamed the words. Oh. My. God. I'm never recovering.

I think my favourite thing, and the most important message that I've taken away from the show, is that Evan Hansen doesn't mask in the final scenes. He's completely himself. And that's okay. That's absolutely okay. You don't have to lie or change yourself to live and you will always be found.

Anyway, thank you to Ryan Kopel for (once again) taking so much care with the characters that you play. It really did make me feel found.

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This is an appreciation post for Adam Colbeck-Dunn's Grantaire (24/25 West End cast) and his PANIC ATTACK AND BREAKDOWN during the barricades.

His Grantaire is so wide-eyed during Red & Black, he's so smiley and he jumps around the stage like a lamb in spring. He tries desperately to get Enjolras' attention, and he watches him so intently. And then he loses that innocent, child-like smile the moment it's announced that Lamarque has died. He grabs hold of Gavroche and shields him away from the others with so much concern.

And then there's the barricades...

Not only does he breakdown after Drink With Me and push Enjolras' hug away, he openly sobs in Gavroche's arms before sliding down against the wall to calm down.

He, again, scoffs and pushes Enjolras away after Eponine dies, and sits on the bench beside Marius to comfort him (stroking his shoulder and telling him he's sorry).

And when the battle starts again, he situates himself on the bench and watches everything around him with so much disbelief and pain on his face. He sits there still until Gavroche runs across the barricade, and then he jumps up and SCREAMS "no" at the top of his lungs. He's reassured by Marius and he is so relieved when Gavroche is okay ... until he isn't. And then he visibly pales and carries Gavroche's body so gently to his resting place, and delicately lays him down on the floor.

AND THEN HE CURLS UP ON THE FLOOR BESIDE GAVROCHE IN A FETAL POSITION AND JUST SOBS AS THE FIGHT STARTS AGAIN. And stays there until Marius is shot, which is when he gets up and rushes over to him ... where Enjolras is too. When Enjolras hugs him, his posture visibly changes and he holds onto him with so much desperation, like he's refusing to let go. When Enjolras runs to the top of the barricade, Grantaire watches in despair from the side of the stage, pinned against the wall by his anxiety and fear.

As his friends start to die on the barricade, he's struggling to breathe and he's frozen in his spot, trying desperately to go and help his friends but so visibly conflicted. He's shaking and he's hitting himself because he thinks he is being a coward. He's having a full blown panic attack and breakdown as Les Amis fight ... and then he lets off the most painful scream and hits himself in the head because he's so frustrated at himself when Enjolras dies ... and this appears to be the push he needed, so he races up to the top of the barricade screaming "you bastards" really softly to go and die alongside the one person he loves more than anything.

I'm never going to get over it.

Adam Colbeck-Dunn is the most beautifully painful Grantaire I have ever, ever seen and I am never recovering from this portrayal.

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I loooove the name Emeric for Enjolras because it means power and I think it really suits him, and I've always gone with Rene for Grantaire because ... 'R' and also because it means rebirth :)

what do yall hc the first names to be of the les mis characters? im curious to hear what others think👀

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It's the 39th anniversary of Les Misérables on stage, which means Les Amis de l'ABC have been dying for their cause for 14244.75 days.

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I am, once again, thinking about how much confusion, hurt and guilt Edwin Payne probably carried around with him after his interaction with Simon in Hell.

Imagine all of the thoughts that were running through his head about not realising how Simon felt about him, about pushing Simon away and making him believe it's because he's disgusted by him, about how different things could have been if he had shown him some kindness.

Imagine how difficult it must be for him to recognise that he probably wouldn't have died if he had realised.

And imagine Charles telling him he's absolutely incorrect about it all because Edwin was not to blame.

Just imagine that interaction between them both.

Imagine Charles reassuring Edwin that he is not to blame, and that he is not broken. Urgh. I love them.

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I will NEVER be getting over Edwin Payne, the dead boy that is touch averse and uncomfortable with his feelings, having to wade through Hell's room of LUST and reaching out for his best friend, who he's in love with, while screaming his name.

He HATES people touching him and it sends him into such a panic when they're trying to pull him in but he still reaches his hand out for Charles.

He trusts him so much.

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How am I supposed to function now 😭

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There's something so painful about Tom Hext Grantaire and Will Callan Marius being so puppy-like, happy and joyous throughout Red & Black and then immediately losing their happiness and dropping their smiles the moment it's announced that General Lamarque has died because they mutually realise they're about to lose the people they love more than anything.

And the way Tom's Grantaire looked at Djavan's Enjolras with such sadness? I'm never recovering from it.

Tom Hext read and understood the Brick better than anyone.

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Happy 11th anniversary to George Blagden's ?

Nobody has ever understood or developed on Grantaire's love of Enjolras in the same way, and I will never get over this cover.

He knew exactly what he was doing, and what he was going was channeling Grantaire completely.