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Ryan Kopel as Evan Hansen is one of the most incredible casting choices made in the world of theatre, and I need to talk about it.

Before I start, I want to preface by saying that I understand that Evan is a complex autistic-coded character. That being said, though, I really do see parts of myself in his character ... and especially in Ryan's portrayal of him. As someone that also has pretty severe anxiety and is autistic, it was really refreshing to see someone similar to myself, and my struggles, on the stage played with so much care and delicacy.

Ryan's Evan stims, he walks on his toes, he struggles with eye contact, he stutters over his words, he doesn't pick up on Jared's jokes and he looks visibly lost whenever he can't think of the right thing to say (or anything to say). And the thing that I found most interesting about his portrayal was the mask that he gave Evan whenever he spoke to the Murphys. He forced himself to speak even when he was struggling, and his voice would change to a deeper, more socially acceptable tone. His posture would change entirely, his stimming would become more subtle (little tugs at his shirt or strokes of his fingers) and he'd appear more confident, even though we, as the audience, know that he isn't.

Masking is something that I rarely see portrayed right, but Ryan as Evan did it so well. And I cannot get over it. I will not get over it.

And then there's the overstimulation that we see Evan Hansen go through: he puts his hands up over his ears, with his eyes darting around the room for an escape while bouncing on his toes and flailing around. His 'Words Fail' was on a whole other planet - the desperation in his voice and the genuine pain as he screamed the words. Oh. My. God. I'm never recovering.

I think my favourite thing, and the most important message that I've taken away from the show, is that Evan Hansen doesn't mask in the final scenes. He's completely himself. And that's okay. That's absolutely okay. You don't have to lie or change yourself to live and you will always be found.

Anyway, thank you to Ryan Kopel for (once again) taking so much care with the characters that you play. It really did make me feel found.

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This is an appreciation post for Adam Colbeck-Dunn's Grantaire (24/25 West End cast) and his PANIC ATTACK AND BREAKDOWN during the barricades.

His Grantaire is so wide-eyed during Red & Black, he's so smiley and he jumps around the stage like a lamb in spring. He tries desperately to get Enjolras' attention, and he watches him so intently. And then he loses that innocent, child-like smile the moment it's announced that Lamarque has died. He grabs hold of Gavroche and shields him away from the others with so much concern.

And then there's the barricades...

Not only does he breakdown after Drink With Me and push Enjolras' hug away, he openly sobs in Gavroche's arms before sliding down against the wall to calm down.

He, again, scoffs and pushes Enjolras away after Eponine dies, and sits on the bench beside Marius to comfort him (stroking his shoulder and telling him he's sorry).

And when the battle starts again, he situates himself on the bench and watches everything around him with so much disbelief and pain on his face. He sits there still until Gavroche runs across the barricade, and then he jumps up and SCREAMS "no" at the top of his lungs. He's reassured by Marius and he is so relieved when Gavroche is okay ... until he isn't. And then he visibly pales and carries Gavroche's body so gently to his resting place, and delicately lays him down on the floor.

AND THEN HE CURLS UP ON THE FLOOR BESIDE GAVROCHE IN A FETAL POSITION AND JUST SOBS AS THE FIGHT STARTS AGAIN. And stays there until Marius is shot, which is when he gets up and rushes over to him ... where Enjolras is too. When Enjolras hugs him, his posture visibly changes and he holds onto him with so much desperation, like he's refusing to let go. When Enjolras runs to the top of the barricade, Grantaire watches in despair from the side of the stage, pinned against the wall by his anxiety and fear.

As his friends start to die on the barricade, he's struggling to breathe and he's frozen in his spot, trying desperately to go and help his friends but so visibly conflicted. He's shaking and he's hitting himself because he thinks he is being a coward. He's having a full blown panic attack and breakdown as Les Amis fight ... and then he lets off the most painful scream and hits himself in the head because he's so frustrated at himself when Enjolras dies ... and this appears to be the push he needed, so he races up to the top of the barricade screaming "you bastards" really softly to go and die alongside the one person he loves more than anything.

I'm never going to get over it.

Adam Colbeck-Dunn is the most beautifully painful Grantaire I have ever, ever seen and I am never recovering from this portrayal.

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I loooove the name Emeric for Enjolras because it means power and I think it really suits him, and I've always gone with Rene for Grantaire because ... 'R' and also because it means rebirth :)

what do yall hc the first names to be of the les mis characters? im curious to hear what others think👀

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It's the 39th anniversary of Les Misérables on stage, which means Les Amis de l'ABC have been dying for their cause for 14244.75 days.

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I am, once again, thinking about how much confusion, hurt and guilt Edwin Payne probably carried around with him after his interaction with Simon in Hell.

Imagine all of the thoughts that were running through his head about not realising how Simon felt about him, about pushing Simon away and making him believe it's because he's disgusted by him, about how different things could have been if he had shown him some kindness.

Imagine how difficult it must be for him to recognise that he probably wouldn't have died if he had realised.

And imagine Charles telling him he's absolutely incorrect about it all because Edwin was not to blame.

Just imagine that interaction between them both.

Imagine Charles reassuring Edwin that he is not to blame, and that he is not broken. Urgh. I love them.

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I will NEVER be getting over Edwin Payne, the dead boy that is touch averse and uncomfortable with his feelings, having to wade through Hell's room of LUST and reaching out for his best friend, who he's in love with, while screaming his name.

He HATES people touching him and it sends him into such a panic when they're trying to pull him in but he still reaches his hand out for Charles.

He trusts him so much.

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How am I supposed to function now 😭

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There's something so painful about Tom Hext Grantaire and Will Callan Marius being so puppy-like, happy and joyous throughout Red & Black and then immediately losing their happiness and dropping their smiles the moment it's announced that General Lamarque has died because they mutually realise they're about to lose the people they love more than anything.

And the way Tom's Grantaire looked at Djavan's Enjolras with such sadness? I'm never recovering from it.

Tom Hext read and understood the Brick better than anyone.

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Happy 11th anniversary to George Blagden's ?

Nobody has ever understood or developed on Grantaire's love of Enjolras in the same way, and I will never get over this cover.

He knew exactly what he was doing, and what he was going was channeling Grantaire completely.

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today i am thinking about the eight bullets that kill enjolras, and how i always see people saying they represent his eight friends to die at the barricade, but when i first read his death what came to my mind was the eight men to escape the barricade alive: valjean, marius, javert, and the five men who are given the national guard uniforms. i think of those eight bullets being meant for those eight men, and enjolras taking them all. he did not change the world in the way he meant, but he changed the world for eight men, and that has to be enough.

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I think the thing that hurts the most about Umbrella Academy season four is that they spent three whole seasons building characterisations and developing the personalities of these traumatised characters that so many people could resonate and see themselves in all to just ... ruin every bit of that in just six episodes.

I didn't recognise a single Hargreeves by the last episode; they were all watered down and they didn't get any redemption or healing.

And that really hurts because they made us care about these people so much.

I suppose ... it makes it easier to say goodbye to characters that you no longer know? Was that the intention? Because it worked? I guess?

I feel so sad for every single fan that had high hopes for their favourite characters, who learned to accept part of themselves because of these characters. The Hargreeves family are so human, and they meant so much to so many people.

I never thought I'd see the day that I'd rather have had a cancelled Netflix show than a finale season.

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He might be the sun, my dear, but you are the star. And it is time you showed your brother how brightly you can sparkle.

EVAN WILLIAMS and ALEXANDER VLAHOS as Chevalier de Lorraine and Philippe I, Duc d'Orléans VERSAILLES 2.02: A STILL SMALL VOICE.

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I want it to be known that when I saw Les Misérables in London on the 24th of July 2024, Tom Hext Grantaire slapped Djavan Van de Fliert Enjolras' backside during Red & Black to try and get his attention and draw him away from his conversation.

And Enjolras turned around, just laughed, and rolled his eyes in a playful way while Grantaire and Marius continued to sing.

They're such a soft ExR. Nobody is doing Enjoltaire like Djavan and Tom. Nobody.

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In loving memory of baker boy Javert <3

hello first post all my main work is on insta but i’m gonna start putting some sketches on here ANYWAY saw stewart javert for the first time last week and i’ve still not recovered. here’s barricade stewvert feat. baker boy hat

(rip baker boy hat, you will be missed)

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Why's it always "omg" and never "I am agog, I am aghast"

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I can't believe there are people out there that go and watch Les Misérables and don't cry over the silly drunk cynic that's in love with their ambitious, god-like leader.

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Enjolras cared about everyone, and Grantaire knew that.

He knew that Enjolras cared so deeply about every person in France that he was willing to put his life on the line to stand up for them. He knew that.

And yet, despite that, Grantaire believed that Enjolras did not care for him.

And that is why Enjolras accepting his hand at the end is so powerful.

Because Grantaire realises he was wrong, and that Enjolras did care for him after all.

And that's his last thought.

As they die hand in hand.