#anyway the first three episodes were amazing
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It has arrived!! PART 2!!
Oh would you look at that...it's absolutely gorgeous. And it's mine~...er, ahem! So! Yes, you are looking at the cover to the Season 2 DVD set of "She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat." I actually got it a day early, alongside other pre-orderers...which is amazing because I'm in the Northeast US and most everyone else who has pre-ordered this is probably only in Japan. That's some amazing shipping power, hot dang!
Anyway, below you will find more photos and me gushing about this firsthand~ [for my S1 post, check here]
The power of fandom knows no bounds, sometimes....The only reason this DVD came to be was thanks to the vocal Japanese fanbase begging all the NHK channels to release it on home media after the show ended back in February. They filled out surveys, they would answer the little engagement posts on Twitter and the like. And bam. Suddenly, in August, this just kinda gets announced out of nowhere! That was when I looked into proxy shipping with CDJapan (I definitely recommend them if they can ship to your country!). I have had this pre-ordered since SEPTEMBER. It has been a long, eager wait.
This one has 3 discs (I love the 2nd disc's photo lmao). After all, S2 was 20 episodes long. Needs more room! But this also has a few more extras than last time, video-wise. The booklet is simpler in comparison, but I did appreciate an actual relationship chart with the whole season's cast featured on it (and I mean whole cast. It even has Fujita's coworkers and the folks that Nomoto and Sayama were working with). That one I will attempt to translate for you all, just like I did with that Yuri Yamada foreword in the S1 set.
The other noteworthy thing from the booklet is just the art that's featured in it. I mean the actual photos and art pieces, not just screencaps. The cover alone? A pretty mash-up on that two-photo set from the promo poster shoot. The first page features some art from Yuzaki-sensei. It's some regular illustrations as well as the announcement illustration made that a S2 was happening. Gotta love the pancake motif~
And then I was floored by the end of the booklet. The same photo is used on the back of the DVD, yes, but let me tell you, it looks REALLY AMAZING as a standalone. I mean, look that that. It's so warm, almost ethereal, the two women looking forward into a brighter future, together!
I should totally also scan that when I scan the relationship chart as well. You all deserve this.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to finish a Good Couples Day illustration and then proceed to enjoy the three different extras featured in this set (a 5-min PR vid, the one 10-min special with Higa, Nishino, and Fujiyoshi, and I guess some social media ads? Something like that, anyway~)
#funari's photos#tsukuritai onna to tabetai onna#she loves to cook and she loves to eat#tsukutabe#yuri#gl series#jdrama#my tsukutabe shelf is getting cramped...no regrets though#i preordered vol 5 btw so i'm gonna have to make some room lmao
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ARCANE S2 SPOILERS
Y'all calling Viktor "Jesus" or the "Messiah" but I KNOW who Viktor reminds me of
#the staff?#the fact he was once on the side of the 'enemy'?#the fact he's trying to save his people from an oppressive regime?#Y'ALL GOT THE WRONG PROPHET#anyway the first three episodes were amazing#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane viktor#viktor arcane#arcane spoilers
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@toshi-flakes
@rainylunesstorm
You make a post asking others to tag their favorite mutuals.
You tag your favorite mutual and post.
Your favorite mutual reblogs your post and tags you.
You two are now obligated to tag each other and reblog the post forever.
The longer it goes on, the faster you two get.
Eventually, the bulk of new posts is just you two reblogging the same post.
Tumblr is forced to buy more servers and storage just for your reblogs.
Tumblr starts selling a new badge called "Best Mutuals" to fund the growing infrastructure.
Tumblr becomes known as that site that's exclusively about two people calling each other their favorite mutuals.
ISPs are forced to improve their infrastructure to accommodate how quickly you two keep reblogging each other.
News spreads to other sites.
The internet eventually becomes just you two reblogging each other.
All news becomes updates about how many times you two reblog each other.
One day, you reblog your mutual's post and they do not reblog back.
Everyone on Tumblr panics and tries to find out what happened to your mutual.
Other social media sites learn about the drama.
News sites give Breaking News reports that your mutual didn't respond back.
Every website starts gathering information about what happened to your mutual.
Political parties come together to find out what happened to your mutual.
World leaders come together to find out what happened to your mutual.
Billionaires pour all their money into finding out what happened to your mutual.
Eventually, your mutual is found and the world waits with baited breathe fearing the worst.
Your mutual was hungry and stepped away to make a sandwich.
After finishing their sandwich, they reblog your post.
All is right with the world.
#AUGHAUDGHUDG FUCK I KEEP FORGETTING GOD UFKCING DMAN IT#SO VERY SORRY YALL...........#anyways YES I DO WANNA HEAR ABT UR HYPDERIFIXNIATONS!!!!!!!!!#<- prev#AUGH I FORGET WAS I AWAS GONNA INFODUMP ABOUT....#OH WAIT I REMBER NOW!!!!#okay so theres this REALLY REALLY COOL AND GOOD AND AMAZING ANIMATION SERIES ON YOUTUBE MY RAINBOTT#ITS CALLED WELCOME TO DREAMWORLD#it was originally going to be a fnaf au#but when they released the prologue they were like “NOPE THIS IS AN ORIGINAL WORK NOW F YOU!!!” and and and and and and and and adn and and#AUGH. I LOVE IT. ITS SO AMAZING AND THE STORYTELLING IS SO GOOD#in the first like. 2 or three episodes it feels like a fever dream. BUT AS YOU GO ON. YOU START TO REALIZE WHY ITS MADE THAT WAY.#the storytelling and voice acting and everything is so good#I GOT SPOOKED AT THE BEGINNING AT FIRST BECAUSE ONE OF THE MCS NAMES IS "STAR LIGHT' AND SO I GOT WHIPLASH LMAO#ANYWAYS INFODUMP OVER GO WATCH WTDW (/nf (unless?))
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how did you get into the magnus archives? like how did you discover it since you were a fan before you got cast?
have your opinions on the podcast (like fav character, headcanons, etc) changed since getting cast?
anyways thanks if you do answer!!! you do such an amazing job as gwen in tmp and it’s truly a delight every time we get to hear from the fandoms favourite character!!!
Hiya!
So, during lockdown I started a TTRPG campaign with friends from uni, college, drama school ... you name it. Just a random bunch of people who liked the idea.
Around October/November 2020, one of them recommended Magnus. They're a massive horror nerd, and I was not into horror at that point (or so I thought, like a FOOL.), but I liked the sound of it and decided to give it a go. I listened to the first two episodes and only broke off because I was about to go and play D&D, and from that moment I was in love - with Magnus, with horror, with voice acting, the whole lot. I said "God, I don't care if I have to work awful jobs for 6.5 days a week - just let me spend the remaining half day working on a show like that" (touch wood, I haven't needed to keep that promise yet ...).
Anyway, time went on, friend and I were on the phone to each other sobbing over the finale (I had liveblogged every episode with them), and that was that. A week later I finished my MA, started working day jobs, and had already e-mailed RQ after being encouraged by my old improv teacher whose name I had heard in the credits a few times (thank you, Ian ❤️).
Three years on and here we are! Madness.
Anyway, I'm not sure how much my opinions have changed as I haven't re-listened since I was cast (except to the odd old favourite). I think it would feel strange to do so now - so much has happened and changed in my life both personally and professionally, and I also listened to TMA at such a distinct moment in time. I always loved the Archivist, Jonah, and the whole concept of the Eye, as well as the Leitner storyline in S2 (possibly my favourite series).
Right, that's turned into another essay. Thank you so much for such kind words - I fully expected everyone to loathe Gwen, so this has all been something of a surprise. Still, I suppose there's still time yet ... 😊
#the magnus protocol#tmagp#magpod#magnus protocol#rusty quill#gwen bouchard#gwendolyn bouchard#tma#the magnus archives#ask noosh stuff
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Transcript of Aaron Ehasz Interview (Sept 2024)
Podcast link here. Transcript down below with bulk under a read more.
R: Alright so welcome back to the Wordswithdragons podcast, and today I’m joined by a very special guest, the co-creator of The Dragon Prince, Aaron Ehasz.
A: Hello, thank you for having me today. Glad to be here.
R: Thank you so much for being here. Um, yeah, so, as we semi touched on, it is the 6 year anniversary of The Dragon Prince this September 14th.
A: Yeah.
R: Do you have any thoughts, reflections, feelings about the show having gone on for this long and being such a big part of people’s lives?
A: I mean for starters, it’s really hard to believe it’s been on for six years. Like that seems insane to me. Cause it seemed like we had — Justin and I had been working on it for so long before it finally came out because we had worked on the story and then gotten feedback, and help in improving that pitch and bringing it out and we had it set up at Netflix, and we had to — we wrote the pilot obviously, and we didn’t know where we were gonna produce it, and found Bardel. So there was so much time between even just starting to think about it and when it came out.
R: Yeah, cause that was like 2015, right?
A: Yeah, I guess we started the journey in 2015 and we got with Bardel by the end of 2016, and it got released evidently in 2018, so... Yeah, yeah, cause I remember even we were writing kind of the end of season 3 when we had that panel with Marco and named the character after Marco.
R: Oh yeah.
A: The character [chuckles] from the first episode, we only had an opportunity for him to say his name out loud in that last episode because we were writing the ending while we were showing the episodes for first time, so. Anyway, that’s my reflection, it’s great it’s been six years.
R: Yeah. I know The Dragon Prince has been a really like — both life changing and I think, like, life affirming experience for a lot of people, myself included. So we just really appreciate everybody’s hard work on the show and are very excited for season 7 and hopefully beyond as well. As well for any future projects that Wonderstorm comes out with, like Bonders sounds amazing.
A: I feel — well first of all, thank you for saying that it’s life affirming, that’s such a nice thing to hear about something you’ve worked on, but I also agree that Justin and I feel a ton of gratitude for the whole team and the work and heart that everyone put into making this. I think people wanted it to be meaningful and special and that takes a certain kind of energy and vulnerability to build something like that, that you share, and our whole team really did give that in building the show.
R: Yeah. I think for sure. I think that’s like, um, I was even — I was rewatching some of the show earlier for — for a parallel, and it was the scene between Avizandum and Zubeia when she goes to him in like her kind of corruption dream semi-nightmare, and obviously that’s such a heartfelt, touching scene, and it’s always so strange. Because on the one hand, you should hate Avizandum, he killed Sarai and Rex Igneous has rightful criticism of him, but then you watch that scene of him and he really did love his family, so I think the show being able to draw out those strong, conflicting emotions for so many of the characters is one of the reasons why it connects with people to the degree that it does.
A: And that’s one of the themes you probably see in the show — just gonna make a quick —
R: Yeah, yeah for sure.
A: Avizandum, which is that being a good dad can make up for awful lot of [R laughs] monstrosities, as long as you’re doing it in the name of being a good dad. I’m joking, uh. Of course, yeah, Avizandum was always meant to be a complicated figure like many of our characters.
R: You mentioned that you guys have been working on — I think season three during this panel with Marco, or Marcos, and I remember, I think you’ve said before that the seasons get worked on concurrently, that there’s a decent amount of overlap.
A: Yeah.
R: I’ve always wondered, because we know — obviously, I’m a big Rayllum fan — but I’ve always wondered, cause I know they weren’t originally planned, and then you guys were boarding season two when you were like, “Hey, maybe this should be a thing,” and then probably like shifted and tweaked things or changed things to write more towards that in the future... Um, I’ve always wondered, if there was time, like at that time, to go back and change anything in season one for them, or the season one that we see was just like that?
A: I don’t recall there was time to change season 1 — that does happen because we are working on things in parallel because we are working on something in the script and then some time later we are working on the later stage of production, like an animatic, and we’ll be able to kind of give notes or even make changes with the knowledge of what’s coming, so that has happened. But in the case of Rayllum, I don’t think so. I mean, I think — again, I remember...
R: It was a while ago, yeah.
A: We were rekindling, or when we were realizing that something was being kindled between them, it was watching an animatic so that shouldn’t have informed our writing of season one, but our later stage stuff. But we weren’t trying to force anything so it got in there naturally and I don’t think we went back and changed anything.
R: Yeah, that’s what I’ve always — they had those kind of vibes to me from like episode two and three, obviously season two brought a lot more people on board, but I was always curious. Cause in season one, like, I think, it feels so natural, it feels so organic, and like I’ve shown — one of the things I love about Dragon Prince is it’s a great way to connect with friends and family and you kind of catch up with each other like through the show, of “oh have you seen the new season yet?” and that sort of stuff. And so when I’ve shown the show to like my brother-in-law, who is not plugged in at all, he also kind of picked up on it in season one, so I’ve always been curious.
A: You know, what else, I’ll even say, I think we initially, intentionally planned they weren’t going to be a couple. We were like “Oh yeah, no, they’re—”
R: Friends, yeah.
A: Friends, with different views of the world and they journey together, and we don’t want them to be a couple. We’re not — we’re definitely not targeting it. I think we were intentionally not targeting it, and then it was “too bad creators! [R laughs] We’re going to fall in love despite everything you’re planning.”
R: Well, that very much I think even fits what they represent to each other, of like you don’t have to do this path that you think you have to do...
A: Yeah.
R: You can be something new. I always kind of felt like Ezran and Zym were — felt very kind of like designed as foils, as like a pair, of like through Zym, Ezran learns more so like how to grow up, and they’re both like the princes who will be king, and then Callum and Rayla also kind of felt sort of like developed as a pair, in terms of like — he needs to gain more confidence, she’s pretty confident on the surface.
A: Yeah.
R: She needs to learn how to open up, he’s really good at being open especially in the beginning.
A: Right.
R: So I was always like...
A: He needs to be murdered, she needs to learn how to murder someone.
R: Yeah! They complete each other, yeah. Uh... Some other questions that I had [rapid typing]. So I guess, maybe, I have some questions that are more season specific, in respect to time, but I also had like more general questions.
A: Okay.
R: So, one of the things I’ve always love in general and really love about The Dragon Prince is its like use of philosophy and like its deeply interested in ethical and moral questions, and presenting some answers for some of them, but like are those the right answers? We don’t know.
A: Right.
R: So I know King Harrow’s choosing of Lady Justice’s blindfold is a pretty apt comparison to John Rawls’ Veil of Ignorance—
A: Yes.
R: Of, you know, you strip away everything that you could have, like advantages, disadvantages, and think, would the system work for me? Which has been useful when I’ve like, had to tutor students in philosophy actually, but I was curious, were there any like philosophical concepts or ideas that people really, or you really, wanted to work into the series? ‘Cause we have a lot of trolley problems.
A: Right. Um, probably. I mean like, I should say, I was a philosophy concentrator in college so I absorbed a lot. Things like Rawls, I had a class with John Rawls, and thought that was a really interesting concept and I liked including it, and I thought we can include it in a fun way, the idea of justice. So other philosophy probably makes its way in, it can makes its way in accidentally or subconsciously, so nothing specific right now comes to mind. I will say, as with kind of Avatar before this, I don’t like to have — I’m not trying to have a right answer, ever. I’m trying to have the characters have a deeper understanding of what they’re struggling with, and y’know, move in a direction of deeper understanding, so if anything, it’s more interesting to me to see conflicts between maybe philosophical approaches that are different and see how — Oh well, this has these kinds of results, and positives and negatives, and this has... so that the audience can have a chance to say, “Oh well okay, I have some thoughts on that,” or “here’s what I feel,” and that’s why sometimes I think we see the fandom actually kind of go back and forth—
R: Yeah.
A: On — around characters and people’s choices, and things like dark magic or Viren, which are controversial, are things where like, I do not have a strong point of view on... the kind of binary right or wrong of... Viren in the long term. He’s made a lot of wrong choices and he’s made a lot of choices for good.
R: Yeah.
A: He is an arrogant and power hungry person and he’s also a caring and loving father and someone who wants to have a positive impact on the world, right, like?
R: Yeah.
A: So those conflicts play out in him. But similarly, I think with maybe most of the philosophical ideas I can think of, I’d rather get to like a place where everyone just has a chance to entertain those thoughts and ideas and struggle with them, or hold them in an authentic way, and then can come to their own conclusions and feelings. I mean, I have some deep feelings about like, the world, and how can people be optimistic or not pessimistic or—y’know, what it means to hold onto hope or what it means to try to move past conflict, and I have beliefs that there are conflicts that get so you know, kind of sewn in, that they feel they are impossible to untangle, and especially if the game you’re playing is who started it, or who did the worst thing, where you can’t just ever untangle it. You can’t ever find a right or wrong, so how do you get past that? That’s one of the questions I was hoping Rayla, Callum, and Ezran would try to—
R: Figure it out.
A: Struggle with. Anyway, I’m giving a very long winded answer—
R: No, no.
A: That’s the philosophy that comes to mind. If something comes to mind for you, you can bring it up and I can go, “Oh yeah, that was probably influenced by so-and-so.” [R laughs] Or maybe not.
R: Well, one of the things I loved about season six was kind of — you see, even... One of the things I thought was really interesting was we see, not quite like that return to trolley problems, but we see Aaravos at the end of season 5 is telling Viren you have to make the sacrifice so that you can live, and then we see Rayla tell Callum, “Hey, if the choice ever happens, you also have to sacrifice me,” for — so Callum can live, but also for like the greater good and that sort of stuff. And then you have Kpp’Ar, who — I love Kpp’Ar, I think he’s terrible and interesting and I love him.
A: Awesome. He is — we’ll learn a little more about him in the future, but yes.
R: And obviously when Viren’s like, “A child will die,” and this is a kid that Kpp’Ar would’ve known, and we see in The Puzzle House that he loved these kids, and whatever is up with the Staff is bad enough that Kpp’Ar’s like, “Okay. I’ll make that sacrifice.” Which feels very much in a way like he’s given up on dark magic, and to a certain degree he’s both given up on the mindset of dark magic, and maybe also hasn’t given it up in the same way. Like I love that — Claudia, you know, obviously, puts Viren above all else, is she always right to do so? Maybe not, but we get why she’s doing it, that’s a hard thing to say. And then we have Callum, who also seems inclined to put Rayla above all else, and because we like Rayla more, we’re like “Yeah, he can do that, it’s okay for him to do dark magic for her, that’s fine,” even if there’s also like, consequences. Cause most characters in the show, like you said, everybody kind of wants the same thing, they wanna have a positive impact on the world, they want to protect their loved ones, but what constitutes that world, what they think is a positive impact, or who they want — how they protect those people, that’s all very malleable and can fluctuate. Viren says “Claudia, you’re on the wrong path,” and we’re like yeah, he’s right, and Karim says the same thing about Janai, like the exact same thing, and we’re like, well he’s wrong.
A: Yeah. I mean a lot of things come to mind when you’re talking through that, but one is there’s often a conflict between rigidity and rules and some kind of compassion, or emotional decision, and those decisions are hard, right? Like I dunno, maybe Kpp’Ar should’ve said, “Okay just this once, it’s Soren,” or not, I don’t know. I mean obviously Kpp’Ar had taken himself to some deep horrible place and he really had, actually. And was like, “Okay, dark magic is just corruption when you start and keep going down this path, but this Viren’s kid so I don’t know.” One of the things here, I think there’s a relationship between — you know, sacrifice plays a role here. Sacrifice and thinking about generations and generational conflict and thinking you know maybe in a way I think is interesting. I think about the beginning of season 6 when Claudia has done all of this and sacrificed another life but also sacrifices some of her soul or whatever to save her dad and he’s like “No no! This is not the way! A parent is supposed to do this for a child but never the other way around,” right? And there’s something to that I find interesting which is — it’s almost the inverse of children having the opportunity to start anew and break cycles, parents potentially have the opportunity to make sacrifices that don’t pass by burdens onto their kids, but sort of like that’s the mirror I see a little bit, in terms of how do you have generational change and evolution? It’s somewhere in younger generations being able to not get stuck on conflicts and burdens, but also the older generations recognizing that they may have to be the one to take the — and this is I think a natural... I dunno, it’s something I think about a little bit and came to mind when you were talking. So we’ll see more about what is the meaning of sacrifice and when — when do you... trade? Yeah.
R: Yeah.
A: Side note on sacrifice. You’re familiar with Game of Thrones? You’ve watched all of Game of Thrones?
R: I’m decently familiar, yeah.
A: Okay.
R: And if not, I can have Kuno explain it to me later, so.
A: One of the things I love about the sacrifice Ned made, that we didn’t realize he’d made until I think the very end of the series, we realize — a sacrifice to his kind of reputation, right? And I’m talking about him representing Jon Snow as his bastard to protect him, right? Think about that, that’s a sacrifice, he had to go through the anger — he didn’t tell his wife the truth, he didn’t tell anyone, because it was the only way to protect the child, and as a result he lived with — even though the truth is that he was a really honest, good, or evidently he didn’t go cheat on his wife, he sacrificed that part of his reputation to protect Jon, at least how I see it. I think things like that are kind of interesting. I dunno.
R: Yeah. Yeah, I think it speaks to that idea of — one of the things I love about Dragon Prince is it’s so much about choices.
A: Yeah.
R: Like one of the things I really really liked about season 6 was that, you know, Callum is like, “Okay, I’m going to get myself purified, healed of dark magic,” and Rayla was his light, which was very validating, cause I had noticed in season two there was like some framing so I was like well “Maybe, maybe” you know? And then slowburn buildup but it was — I think that was a great moment that really paid off. And he’s told “if you ever do this again, it’ll corrupt you completely.” And whether he will or won’t — I personally think that he will, but spoilers, you know — but whether he will or won’t, I think it’s really nice because now whatever choice he makes, he’s making with the full context, of what this would do to him.
A: Yeah.
R: Whereas in season two, yes he was making his choice to do dark magic then, and I don’t necessarily think he would make a fundamentally different one if he had known what it would lead to, but there’s a different kind of awareness. Like I always of it would’ve been so easy to have Harrow not know that Viren was going to kill Zym, cause that’s such an easy way to kind of let Harrow off the hook of well Viren went off and did this on his own, and Harrow had no idea, and blah blah blah, right? Cause we like Harrow, he’s a — again, he’s a good dad, we’ll forgive a lot. And instead, it’s not his idea but he’s fully aware, he signs off on it. And I think constantly pushing characters to make hard choices — kind of like what Ezran says, “these aren’t dreams, these are choices.”
A: Yeah.
R: You can choose love, you can choose to make... It’s something that makes all the characters feel so fully developed and interesting, so I always appreciate that you guys push them to make the hard choice.
A: Yeah. Cool. Thank you.
R: One question I did have is, uh, Karim is one of my favourite characters.
A: Okay. Unusual person. A lot of people hate — or love to hate...? I love him too.
R: I also love Kasef, so I think I just kind of love everyone, because I’m like well, they’re really interesting. I feel like [Karim’s] arc was one of the things I loved most about season 4 because you can see him really wrestling with his choices and I love watching him fail, cause that’s kind of all he does, so that’s always fun. But I am really curious obviously now he’s been betrayed by Sol Regem, Katolis is in ashes and maybe they’ll blame Karim for that cause Sol Regem is like — dead, and now, presumably his only hope is going to be that his sister doesn’t execute him on the spot?
A: Yeah.
R: So is there anything you can tease about Karim’s arc in season 7?
A: Yeah, so — so it’s not just Karim, there’s an army of people who betrayed Janai, and — and...
R: What do we do?
A: Yeah, what do we do? That will be something we’ll have to see them grapple with pretty much right away in the season. Especially cause [Karim’s army] showed up for this battle where they were never even — they were just planning to sweep up the ashes afterwards, so when they didn’t get the dragon support they needed, I suspect they lost really quickly.
R: Yes, yeah.
A: So uh... Yeah, but basically as of the start of season 7 — all of them are prisoners of Queen Janai and the question is — what do you do with that? What do you do when you have an entire army and your own brother who betrayed you? And so that’s — we’ll find out.
R: Yeah. [Laughs]
A: But yeah.
R: Yeah. Another question I had going forward was Terry and Claudia obviously I thought had a really beautiful relationship arc, particularly in season 6, and we saw in season 4 the lengths he’s willing to go to for her, and how Terry, I think, is a great example of how there’s a lot of character traits where we think “oh, if you’re a selfless, helpful, accepting person, you’re a good person,” and I feel like Dragon Prince does a really good job of how, Rayla’s selflessness can be great but it can also be kinda bad, or, um, Terry can be super accepting, maybe a little too—
A: Yeah.
R: —accepting sometimes, right? So I feel like at the end of season 6, it will presumably be him, Claudia, and Aaravos for a little bit now that he’s out of the prison. And it feels like maybe Terry might hit a breaking point?
A: Here’s what I will say — Terry is a really special character and if you watched him, he’s so good, and what we’ll find out is, he is — there is an episode called TRUE HEART and he is someone who has a true heart.
R: Oh that’s so sweet.
A: It’s very impossibly rare and special — but also we all understand what a true heart is in some way and we’ll learn a little more about that. But yeah, the question of what will Terry do, what can he do, is difficult because he has a very strong sense of right and wrong, but he has a very deep capacity for love and he loves Claudia with all of his heart. Where does that present an impossible conflict, it may... we’ll see a challenge.
R: Yeah. Yeah, for sure.
A: I’ll also throw in like I sometimes see some parallels between Terry and Uncle Iroh—
R: Yes.
A: Though Uncle Iroh I think has a very different journey. Iroh is kind of a recovered problematic person who now has some wisdom and enlightenment, so in terms of the difference between the purity of a true heart versus where Iroh is more of a later stage enlightenment, the love that they have for the kind of complicated person that they are with is similar to me. And the way that they both sometimes have to, or don’t have to but...
R: Choose to?
A: You have to give that person the space — you can’t force them to choose right or wrong, you can be there with them, you can try to guide them, you can — but ultimately you have to give them the space to fail, and eventually, you may have to turn your back on them.
R: Yeah.
A: At some point. I don’t know. But um yeah — I still see them as connected characters in my mind.
R: I think I can even see some of that with even the way Callum is with Rayla, like season five onwards, of like “I’ve hit my turning point, I’m not mad at you anymore, and you can steal my key, you can lie to me, and I’m not going to have you open up to me out of guilt or obligation, I want you to tell me what’s going on when you want to tell me what’s going on, and I’m going to give you the space for that.” So I think it speaks to that unconditional love that I think—
A: Yeah.
R: —a lot of the characters are blessed to have. But I do see the Terry Iroh connection. So another thing that I thought was really interesting was — obviously next season is dark magic, and I’m very hopeful that maybe we’ll learn more about the origins of dark magic or Elarion, even.
A: Great.
R: Because I know when I was watching Sol Regem burn down Katolis, it made me think of what might’ve either happened or almost happened to Elarion in the past, you know?
A: Yeah.
R: Even down to Ziard and Viren both die, kind of deflecting and trying to save people, with the same staff, you know, and how the cycle continues to just always repeat itself over and over again. And if there was like — yeah, cause burning down Katolis was a massive shakeup, you know?
A: Yup.
R: And what maybe the process was there, with the — Aaravos seems like he’s trying to repeat the cycle of like “Oh I’m going to take down the dragon monarchy or I’m gonna use that vacancy to my advantage, and mess with the Sunfire elves.”
A: He has a specific vendetta against Sol Regem, obviously, but it’s one where he has played it out in... What’s certainly meant to be implied, even though we’ll find out more later, is that one of the great mysteries of Sol Regem’s life is that his mate disappeared and he never found her. He’s the freaking Dragon King, and she disappeared. And though we don’t know how or what happened, while she was buried alive. He killed her. He didn’t even realize it, somehow. Somehow, Aaravos manipulated him into killing her, and he doesn’t — I dunno, I assume Sol Regem does understand when it must have happened, but that moment, it’s like an impossible — it’s meant to be just...
R: Awful.
A: He’s tortured him for 1000 years or whatever, without him knowing he was being tortured by Aaravos, and now he’s given him the mercy/cruelty of knowing the resolution to the mystery was that he killed her. And one of the things that worked well with that was that, we had sort of said Sol Regem can smell the truth from a lie, so he has the horrible curse of being able to know this is the deep dark truth. So I dunno, I think um, are we going to find out more about that? So, if we can eventually get the Book Three novel out [R laughs], we will find out more about that.
R: I did wonder, I was like “Maybe this is something that was gonna be in the book three novelization.”
A: Yes, we will find out more in the book three novel, it may be a year or so before unfortunately. And then I don’t think we’re gonna get too deep into that in season seven, that’s part of — it is involved in what we’re thinking about as the third arc, understanding and resolving the third arc, is gonna go a little deeper into...
R: Some of the history, yeah.
A: Some of the stuff that happened with Sol Regem. But yeah, no, I — it’s enjoyable to have these figures like Aaravos and Sol Regem who are ancient and operate over the course of centuries and are incredibly powerful, yet they can’t — or at least Aaravos, they can’t conflict directly as easily, and so Aaravos has played this really complicated game. Anyway, but yes Sol Regem is part of that, but there’s — there’s more, there’s more people who — beings that took from him. He feels that Leola was unfairly punished and that that was — you know, he sees a future and he has something... All this time, a burning — it’s the twisted form of his love, in which he’s full of hate right now to the beings who brought this about. Obviously, Sol Regem played a role because he’s a rules dragon.
R: Yeah, yeah.
A: He is the one who betrayed her to the Cosmic Council ultimately — but how do you punish the Cosmic Council? That’s a bit more complicated.
R: Yeah. No, I remember finishing season six and just being so impressed with the story. Like, taking that direction, and almost doing a lot of recontextualization, because it’s one thing to have like your worldbuilding where “magic in the story works like this” and it’s just very kind of like hand of God, you know? Like oh — cause the magic system has always been unfair, that’s why we have Callum, you know? It’s another thing to say we’re going to have characters in the story who are responsible for it being unfair. And now we’re just going to have that in terms of conflict and themes of destiny. We have about seven, ten-ish minutes left I think.
A: Probably seven, if that’s okay?
R: Yeah. Of course.
A: I’ll throw one other thing in there, which is that — cause characters experience things that change them: has Aaravos experienced — I’ll phrase it as a question, even though probably the answer is here, has Aaravos experienced much that has changed him in the last — since the death of Leola? I mean certainly some things, and is what’s happening now changing him in any way? Is it satisfaction, is it the relationship with Claudia, and what does that mean to someone? That’s a question that I think we’ll have to watch play out a little bit.
R: [Intrigued] Okay. Yeah. One thing that I really liked about Leola’s character was I felt like she had pieces of each of the main trio in her? Of this very helpful innocent well meaning child, kind of like Ezran — and I have also always seen Ezran as autistic as well cause I know that Leola canonically is — and then you also kind of have the whole oh she gave / helped humans have primal magic, which obviously Callum has. And even just being this young elven girl punished for her compassion and mercy, that felt a lot like Rayla. And when making the choice for Leola to be Leola, was that something intentional or like the choice for it to be a child rather than another loved one?
A: It was very intentional that it was a child... And we talked through other versions of Leola that could’ve been, in other ages, genders, relationships with Aaravos that an important person was lost. Some of the things I liked about the way, Leola both as a child, children are the cycle breakers.
R: Yes, yeah. I think it was the strongest choice.
A: And in particular also, the idea of coding her autistic was a little bit like not as cued to kind of accept the social order and the order of things, but actually more open in a way to in what some people see as like — something that’s broken which is not taking those cues, something else about that — not being bound by it that allowed her to have compassion that crossed the line in terms of the perceptions of what the Cosmic Order needed to be in it — but it made her more, both as a child and an autistic person, to make that choice and do what she did that changed everything.
R: Makes a lot of sense.
A: [Her being a child] also frames it with some innocence obviously right? It’s not calculated, it’s kind.
R: Yeah.
A: So I dunno.
R: Yeah. Yeah, I’ve been curious about how Ezran might be challenged now that Runaan is back in the picture.
A: That’s a great question. That’s a great question. I mean, it’s so weird, it’s like no one even asks that, it’s like “Cool,” Rayla’s like “I’m gonna go get him. Awesome! Runaan’s back.”
R: Yeah I’m like either — either Callum is like “Ezran will be totally fine with it,” and Ezran is probably not going to be fine with it, or maybe Callum knew that maybe it wouldn’t be great, and kept it under wraps. Yeah, I’m so excited for that like trio, potential broyals conflict, so...
A: Well, I mean, Ezran is a very special kid and he’s very positive and kind and forgiving and all of this. But we’re talking about, Runaan is back.
R: Castle’s destroyed.
A: Katolis is rubble. Where does that leave him?
R: Yeah.
A: You know? I mean — so I’m excited about that part of Ezran.
R: I know the fandom is really, really excited for Ezran to get to be — not that he hasn’t always been complex, but to get to be like messier, of letting his emotions maybe get the better of him and that sort of thing. So people are definitely hype for that, for — cause I feel like season six really brought home a lot of things for Soren, and it seems like season seven is going to do a similar thing for Ezran, so that’s — that’s really exciting. Um, with our final couple minutes, I wanted to see — do you have any questions that you want fans to ponder or to be thinking about?
A: Um... Gosh. I don’t think I have anything specific that we haven’t talked about, but you know. On some level, like, you know how do you take the tragedies and conflicts that we all inevitably face repetitively and relentlessly and kind of learn to move forward in hope and optimism? I think that’s more of a question of like how do you personally learn to process — all the kind of bullshit in the world, and process it, and still move forward as a kind, connected—
R: Measured person.
A: —hopeful person? That’s a challenge we all face in our lives, so that’s like...
R: Yeah. Well, I think the show does a good — really good job at asking and challenging that — that question. Uh, yeah, I think — I think that’s our time for today, uh. Thank you so much, this was...
A: It was my pleasure.
R: This was a lot of fun.
A: It’s always my pleasure reading your theories and your—
R: [Gasps] Oh my gosh.
A: Honestly, I came on today and to tell the truth [R laughs] a little bit intimidated.
R: Oh my God.
A: You’re so—
R: I also felt intimidated [laughing] so don’t worry.
A: You’re so insightful and articulate, that I almost am like [R laughs] what if they catch me that there’s something not as smart in the show as I thought it was?
R: Oh my gosh, no, you’re fine.
A: [Overlapping] So anyway, I really enjoy what you write—
R: [Overlapping] I’m also a writer so I know what it’s like to be like “I did this subconsciously,” it’s — yeah.
A: I love what you instigate in the fandom and the kind of conversations you support and engage in. I’m a huge fan of yours, so.
R: Oh! Thank you so much, that’s so sweet. Um. And I am a huge fan of yours.
A: Yay. That’s a great way to end a podcast.
R: That is a great way. Okay. Alright, well thank you so much, hope you have a great day, great week, uh, and — yeah. Okay.
A: Alright, and I’ll see you soon, we’ll do this again sometime, I hope.
R: Yes! Yeah. Okay.
A: Alright. Thanks again. Alright, bye.
#tdp#the dragon prince#podcast#cast and crew#wordswithdragons#aaron ehasz#transcripts#interviews#s6#arc 2#transcription
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Random Obey Me! Headcanons Part 2
During the first year of the exchange program and when MC couldn't fend for themselves yet, the only way they were allowed out of the house "alone" was with Cerberus accompanying them. And when I tell you the hellhound did an amazing job at protecting them… all it took was a slightly off-putting stare at MC for it to send back the most terrifying glare and loud growl at the demon eyeing them. These outings of theirs once resulted in a pretty infamous picture going viral, where MC was mindlessly buying ice cream at a stall while Cerberus was beside them giving off the most ominous aura as all its heads glared at someone off-screen. You can imagine all the memes that came from it.
When Satan was a baby he used to have constant nightmares about the war and would always wake up screaming and crying, waking up everyone with him. Because of this Lucifer would have to stay up at ungodly hours of the night trying everything he could to calm him down, having to rock the tiny demon in his arms for hours around the corridors till he eventually went back to sleep. At some point Diavolo suggested that he read for Satan, as it was a less energy-draining method. And although Lucifer didn't really see the point given that Satan was a baby and couldn't even understand words yet, he gave it a shot anyway. It ended up working, to both his relief and surprise.
When Mammon first realized he could both understand and tell crows what to do he thought he was going insane. And the brothers were all sure he was lying when he first told them of his ability, having to see firsthand Mammon order around an army of crows as if it was nothing. They were definitely left speechless that day.
Asmo has a podcast where he mainly talks with other famous influencers from the Devildom and demons in the fashion or music industry. All the brothers participated in an episode at some point, and so did MC, the Purgatory Hall crew, and Diavolo.
If MC has a similar clothing style to Mammon's, he'll let them have the clothes he doesn't use anymore. And there's a TON of them, since he buys so many just out of greed and never bothers wearing them more than two or three times.
A few months into the exchange program Diavolo came up with an idea to have the whole gang ( HoL, Purgatory Hall, and the Demon Lord's Castle ) meet up monthly to hang out, have dinner together, etc. It was another way he found to strengthen the bonds between everyone, and no one was allowed to miss it. In the beginning it was a chore to participate but now everyone gets excited when the end of the month starts coming around and they can meet again.
This one time when the brothers were all drunk playing stupid games together they decided that whoever ended up last would have to get an embarrassing tattoo of whatever the others chose. Belphie lost, and to this day the brothers still crack up whenever they catch a glimpse of the small tattoo on his rib that reads "baby of the family". Belphie always gets pissy about it, making them tease him even more.
( Spoilers for lesson 16 ) I went into more detail about this in another post but I believe MC also carries memories from the Celestial War because of their connection to Lilith. And this is something that brings them closer to Satan, since as mentioned before, he also has memories of that time but from Lucifer's perspective. Aka, trauma bonding ✨
Following the tattoo headcanon, Belphie definitely lied to MC about the rib tattoo at first since they didn't couldn't understand Infernal and didn't know what it said. Man 100% told them it meant something else and made up some deep story behind it to make himself look cool or whatever. But it all came crumbling down when everyone went on a trip to the beach and the brothers brought up his "adorable tattoo". He never felt so embarrassed in his life.
Ever since finding out about pride month, Asmo made it into a thing to visit the human realm every year to celebrate it by going to the biggest parade happening that year. And he always drags the brothers with him, making sure to pick outfits for Belphie, Beel, and Lucifer since none of them know how to "dress properly for pride." He just can't let what happened the first time they went happen again, with everyone at the parade wearing colorful and beautifully elaborate clothing while these 3 looked completely out of place ( Lucifer was wearing a full black suit, just so you have an idea. So yeah, he was sticking out in the crowd like crazy ).
As a joke, every time Father's Day comes up the characters go around giving Lucifer, Barbatos, and Simeon shitty gifts and wishing them "Happy Father's Day". But not Beel, who even though knows everyone's doing it for a bit, still gives them a genuine gift and a sincere smile every time. Because let's be honest, these three deserve some actual acknowledgment for raising their troublesome children-not-children. ( Fun fact: Diavolo gives Barbatos both a gag gift and an actual one, and Luke gives Simeon a gift while trying to make it seem like he's just doing it for the joke, though it's obvious he means it. )
Long ago when anime wasn't a thing yet Levi used to be obsessed with marine life. He had extensive knowledge of it and would be pulling random ocean facts out of nowhere and leaving everyone confused. And he absolutely loved sharks, like, you know those people that'll go into great detail to explain why our perception of sharks is fucked and they're actually sweethearts? Yup, that was Levi. Also, if you said your favorite animals were dolphins? Oh, you'd be seeing the most disgusted look show up on his face. ( He'd too explain that dolphins are evil and why you shouldn't like them at all, completely ruining your view of them )
Since Asmo, Beel, and Levi are represented by cold-blooded animals ( a scorpion, a fly, and a serpent ) I headcanon that they can't generate a lot of body heat and touching their skin when it's cold would feel like coming in contact with freezing ice and definitely not the move if you're looking for warmth. Lucifer, Mammon, Satan, and Belphie though? These 4 become MC's personal heaters when winter comes around, and you better bet they're demanding cuddles from all of them ( cold-blooded gang be jealous as fuck of this ).
Solomon puts weird shit on what he cooks on purpose just to fuck with everyone. His grandpa ass finds it absolutely hilarious how everyone tries to keep him away from the kitchen at all costs while simultaneously doing everything to avoid outright saying his cooking is terrible because they don't want to hurt his feelings. Because come on, how does a man who's lived this long on his own not know how to cook? He can follow strict instructions to make the weirdest potions ever but not a recipe to make a simple dinner? Nah, I don't buy it. He definitely knows how to cook and does a decent job at making food for himself when he wants to.
#omswd#obey me headcanons#obey me lucifer#obey me mamon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#obey me luke#obey me simeon#obey me solomon#om brothers#om purgatory hall#om demon lord's castle#om headcanons#☙ no creativity for names ✾
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LOVE ON AiR: 16. YAP CENTRAL EP.136: did social media ruin relationships?
WARNiNGS » profanity, mentions of d wording, sexual jokes, crying, ynhoon teasing, yn never being safe
wc: 3.1k
episode desc - enjoy your stay today in yap central! as we’ve done the whole cycle, todays episode is a deeper one! we open up with a positive impact we’ve seen on each other. then we go right in with how our presence on social media has affected our relationships. following that up we keep the theme of the deeper episode and go over the influence social media has on us and how we view ourselves. we end the episode off by saying one thing we’ve noticed about one another as we’ve grown and how we think it affects the friendship. the episode ends off on a bittersweet note but we hope you enjoyed your stay today in yap central!
*the 6 of you are seated in your assigned seats. jungwon adjusts the soundboard and riki tests the mic out, then giving him a thumbs up. sunoo sets his mic up a little closer to pick up his audio and looks to the camera, setting his phone down*
sunoo: it’s been so long since we sat in here
giselle: i know like two weeks right?
yn: i think almost three *you say, adjusting your outfit as well as your seating position. riki scoots over so you have more room.*
jungwon: i mean it counts as like a summer break since we didn’t really take one.
kat: good point. you know guys do you guys remember those um fuck what were they called
riki: it would help if you gave a description
kat: shut up im thinking
*the rest of you stare at kat in silence until jungwon breaks the silence to laugh, the rest of you following suit*
jungwon: im sorry it’s just what could it be that has you thinking that long
giselle: she’s using everything in that little brain come on now!
*giselles comment makes the rest of you laugh even harder, kat laughing as well*
kat: i can’t even think of it nevermind
yn: it’s okay babe you’ll find it later.
riki: i have to say these costumes are amazing actually. might be my favorite theme
giselle: you know riki you’ve been hating a lot less recently.
jungwon: i was gonna say that too, he’s a bit nicer
riki: what can i say, finally holding my deal for the new year’s resolution
yn: watch now that we said this he’s gonna be doing some fucked up shit by the time the episode comes out
*a text box pops up on the screen saying “he in fact did do some fucked up shit during the editing process of the episode - jungwon” then disappears after a couple seconds.*
riki: you have no faith in me
yn: simply stating the facts
jungwon: you guys ready for me to sign in?
kat: go for it man *she nods at jungwon who smiles back. jungwon adjusts himself and looks to the camera*
jungwon: beep beep! you’ve arrived in yap central i am your host today, jungwon or aang. starting from my far left we have.
kat: toph
riki: zuko
yn: katara!
giselle: azula
sunoo: appa!! *he shows off his fuzzy appa bucket hat, earning a smile from all of you*
yn: sunoo i love you please don’t die
*sunoo looks at you in horror as the others burst out laughing*
jungwon: anyways.. *nervous laugh* the cycle is complete so today is a deep episode!
giselle: oh my god last time i literally bawled on my way home
kat: won you always pick the most brutal questions
sunoo: i cannot believe you asked us if the younger versions of ourselves would like the us now. like that is so ugh
riki: look at the way he’s smiling i think it’s something torturing again
*jungwon grins evilly at everyone making the rest of you groan in both discomfort and agony.*
jungwon: starting with my first question! what is a positive impact you have noticed on each of us. let’s start with sunoo. you guys don’t have to go one at a time just build it up.
sunoo: okay well.. lay it on me. *he looks to the rest of you, nervously, then shocked at who speaks up first*
riki: you laugh a lot more
*giselles eyes widened as riki spoke, the rest of you sharing the same reaction. everyone stayed quiet so riki could talk.*
riki: like when we were in highschool you always seemed to be bothered, or like you just never really were happy. and i think when we started doing this and you started tiktok you’ve been a lot happier
yn: i was honestly gonna say the same thing. you seem happier when we go out sunoo, like you want to be there.
sunoo: i feel a lot happier, honestly it sounds stupid but doing this with you guys does make me really happy.
kat: i agree. i mean i really wouldn’t trade it for anything.
giselle: awww look at us having our moment!
*both you and sunoo giggle at giselles comment, jungwon nodding to giselle, signaling she’s next*
kat: giselle, you don’t really care what people have to say about you anymore.
jungwon: ahhhh i was gonna say that
kat: like you seem so much more confident now than you did before.
giselle: when though? because i feel like i just started feeling like this overnight.
yn: if i were to pinpoint a time frame id say when you broke up with [BLEEP]
sunoo: no i COMPLETELY agree, like there’s a brightness to you now.
giselle: aw thank you guys *she pouted then smiled*
jungwon: guys please be nice to me.
riki: you’ve always been a natural born leader. i just think you’ve always been positive.
yn: i agree but there’s like a glow to him now
kat: oh my god are you pregnant?
*everyone looks at kat then bursts out laughing. some of you stop but jungwon and giselle can’t stop laughing.*
sunoo: oh my god it has something to do with who gave you that bracelet
jungwon: sunoo seriously *his cheeks turn pink, hand now covering the friendship bracelet*
giselle: oooo who made it for you?
jungwon: it was a mutual swap
yn: mutual swap.. or she gave you that wap?
*the others start laughing again, jungwon as well. riki daps you up*
riki: that was a bar
jungwon: i’m not admitting anything.. on camera.
everyone: OOOOOOOO
jungwon: next! go flame yn!!
yn: not fair, we weren’t even done with you
jungwon: don’t care, you’re not as closed off as you used to be
riki: oh my god yeah, when we were kids you were so shy
yn: really? i feel like im still in my little shell
kat: no i get what they mean. i mean even when i met you, you were really shy.
yn: thank you?
riki: i think jungwon means it in the way that you’re more open to meeting others now. like you enjoy being a people person
yn: ahhh, i see now. i guess the podcast really helped with that. like seeing people say how they enjoy my little bits and just things like that. it sounds conceited but it almost made me feel like people actually valued me? you know.
giselle: i get it, it doesn’t sound conceited babe
yn: okay i don’t like this much attention
giselle: this sounds weird to say but riki has gotten nicer atleast to us
kat: yeah i see
riki: die
sunoo: glad to know you haven’t changed..
jungwon: guess someone doesn’t wanna open up today
riki: oh would you look at that! it’s kats turn!!
yn: i think kats tells us a lot more now. like before you never really told us anything about yourself.
kat: i just have trust issues, it was nothing personal.
giselle: it’s true it took her so long to open up to me
riki: i honestly think the podcast brought out the best in us. surprisingly enough
jungwon: i see what you mean. maybe another way to put it is that we realized how much closer the camera brought us
giselle: or this friendship is just a ploy for jungwon to make more money off of us
*everyone laughs*
sunoo: we’re such coworkers
yn: heard it here first!! giselle hates her friends
giselle: can you stop with that *laughs*
yn: oh i’ll drag it through the mud
giselle: then i’ll drag yn[BLEEP] through the mud
*everyone laughs even harder now, you side eyeing giselle.*
sunoo: she kinda got you there
yn: let’s move on?
jungwon: speaking of relationships. *you glare jungwon down as he chuckles a little, looking at his phone once more.* how do you guys think social media affected your relationships and how do you think social media just influences how you view yourself. you can answer it in any order.
sunoo: i feel like having a presence on social media just makes having a relationship so much harder.
giselle: it kinda does, like people just expect for you to lay out your entire lives on social media.
jungwon: i think it depends on what kind of person you’re with, it’s almost like that person has to be up to your fans standards you know.
yn: i think there’s some people who can be normal about it but at the same time you have to be okay with everyone knowing everything about you.
kat: yeah but then it just shows that people online think that we don’t deserve privacy. it’s fucked up like they’re borderline stalking us you know?
*riki glanced at you as kat spoke, noticing how you stiffened at the word stalking*
riki: a lot of people aren’t okay online, it’s weird. like being so obsessed with someone to the point of finding out their personal information
giselle: if that ever happened to any of us i really don’t know what i would do.
jungwon: i think i honestly would try to sue you know. you have to be a certain level of fucked to do something like that.
yn: yeah, i agree it’s so weird.
kat: i kinda don’t wanna sound like a pick me
riki: just say it, you won’t sound like one.
kat: it’s so much harder being a girl with a social media presence.
sunoo: the fact that you had to hesitate to even say that says everything
jungwon: i really don’t get it either, like i’ve seen both women and men do the same things online and sometimes the guy is worse than the girl and yet it’s always the girl getting attacked and harassed.
giselle: i think it’s because people just view girls as easy targets almost. like a girl could do something completely normal and the internet would spin it to make her a villain
yn: it’s disgusting really, no one really ever really wants to side with a girl.
jungwon: do the comments still get you guys? i mean i know it was really bad in the beginning
kat: actually no i remember when it got bad. it got bad that episode where [BLEEP]
*jungwon and giselle glance at each other then start laughing*
giselle: remind me to edit that out.
yn: honestly no, the comments don’t bother as much anymore. after a while i realized that they’re just saying this because they have nothing else to talk about so i just stopped looking.
kat: i agree, it gets better when you just stop reading the comments all together.
riki: god please take periods away from women and give it all to me.
*you and kat give riki a look then burst out laughing, sunoo jungwon and giselle following that.*
sunoo: can’t stay serious for a second
riki: i would never joke about women in pain
*jungwon and kat keep laughing as riki goes on, unable to take him seriously*
yn: going back to the original question i just think it’s hard, like seeing people overstep a boundary or intrude on your life and just be okay with it
sunoo: and people just say oh well you asked for this um? no i didn’t actually i just wanted post skincare videos
*jungwon snorts, causing a chain reaction for everyone else to laugh*
kat: im glad we haven’t cried in this episode yet.
giselle: oh my god don’t jinx it he still has two more questions
jungwon: you might cry at this next one *kat sends a look to jungwon and he gives her an evil smile* my next question is what changes have we seen in one another as we’ve grown up together. it can be good or bad.
riki: jungwons lost it this is so similar to the first question
yn: i feel like he means overall
jungwon: thank you! atleast someon listens to me
yn: *you look around shocked and confused* oh my god.. did you guys hear that? was that a ghost?
*jungwon stares at you as everyone else laughs at your joke*
sunoo: so are we gonna go around in a circle?
jungwon: no how about.. the person sitting across from you. like riki sits across from giselle so they can say it about each other
kat: wait i wanna start
sunoo: this is too much pressure
kat: *she stares at sunoo and smiles warmly* sunoo i admire your love for us. like i don’t know you always support all of us no matter what and i feel like as we’ve grown closer you just have so much love to give
giselle: that’s so adorable
riki: sunoo i love your videos please don’t die
sunoo: STOP WITH THAT JOKE *he turns to look at kat* thank you kat i love you. i have to say sometimes i feel like you don’t tell us everything but it’s okay, just because we’re your friends doesn’t mean we have to know everything about you. i just want you to know that we’ll always listen no matter what.
*kat stares at sunoo as he smiles at her, then looks down when she feels tears welling up in her eyes. riki looks at giselle and jungwon panicked as they pass him the box of tissues.*
yn: aw babe *you frown looking at her as she lifts her head up to see tears streaming down her cheeks*
sunoo: wait i didn’t mean to make you cry
kat: it’s okay i jinxed myself
*everyone laughs slightly, still worried about her. sunoo moves his mic and gets up to hug kat. they stay like that for a few seconds until he lets go, patting her head. he says something but the mic can’t pick it up then walks back to his seat.*
kat: it’s not that i don’t want there was just a time where i felt like no one really care you know?
jungwon: you’re not obligated to tell us everything, but we care more than you think even if we have weird ways of showing it. *he glares at riki who only throws his hands up*
*the rest of you laugh at riki’s reaction and even kat lets out a chuckle after wiping her tears*
kat: to the viewers watching.. this never happened i am mysterious and batman doesn’t cry
giselle: nurse.. she’s out again
riki: okay giselle! lay it on me! *claps his hands together*
giselle: you use being mean as a cover up you actually care a lot about what people think but you use being rude or mean as a shield.
*sunoo gasps, the rest of you stare in silence because giselle is 100% right*
riki: okay cut the cameras
jungwon: i mean she’s not wrong
riki: if you wanted me to cry it’s not gonna happen
giselle: i know
riki: i hate you guys
sunoo: yeah sure you do
riki: well, since you want a taste of your own medicine *riki clears his throat* you shouldn’t get into another relationship, atleast until you evaluate how you act during them.
giselle: excuse me?
jungwon: weird ass time to admit your feelings
riki: you’re a weirdo that’s not how i meant it
yn: well then how did you mean it
kat: i’m curious
riki: every time i've seen you get into a relationship you just stop acting like yourself. you’re less confident and it’s almost as if you change yourself to please the guy you’re with. I just don’t like seeing any of my friends like that.
*all of you stare in silence at giselle, the air feeling heavy as she pushes her mic away and mumbles something to jungwon then ups and leaves.*
yn: um. is she okay?
jungwon: she needs a second
riki: was it something i said?
jungwon: it’ll be okay, she just said she needs a second.
sunoo: she’ll be okay guys, let’s move on yeah?
yn: okay well.. jungwon i think you bottle a lot of things up, intentional or not.
jungwon: *he sighs, crossing his arms* it’s not intentional i just think you guys have too many worries on your own plates to worry about mine.
kat: even if we have a lot going on that’ll never stop us from wanting to know what’s going on won
jungwon: i know i guess it’s just hard? to admit i need help?
sunoo: there’s never anything wrong with that
jungwon: thanks guys
riki: yeah yeah
jungwon: okay yn, im glad you like yourself more
kat: um
riki: wow!
sunoo: that is certainly a statement
yn: excuse me??
jungwon: no i worded that terribly
*the 5 of you burst out laughing at jungwons poor word choice. within this time giselle walks back in, closing the door slightly. the mics can’t pick it up but riki mouths “im sorry” to her. causing her to shake her head and smile. “it’s good” she mouths back making him smile back.*
jungwon: what i mean to say is that you’re more confident now. not just about yourself but your videos too. i’m glad to see this change in you
yn: thank you won, it means a lot
jungwon: of course
giselle: well this was certainly an episode
yn: one of us always ends up crying
sunoo: that sadist probably likes it too
jungwon: woah? the term isn’t sadist
*the rest of you laugh*
sunoo: let’s have a group hug! everyone up on your feet
*sunoo stands up, kat and giselle following suit. you and jungwon stand up and riki groans, then reluctantly stands up. the 6 of you huddle around one another and go for a group hug. the mics can’t pick up your voices but the recording has slight shuffling and giggles from you 6. after a couple seconds you pull apart and sit back down in your respective seats.*
giselle: i love you guys
kat: me too
sunoo: me three
jungwon: me four
yn: me five
*everyone looks at riki who only rolls his eyes*
riki: me six..
jungwon: well guys hope you enjoyed your stay in yap central we hope you didn’t cry too much. i have been your host jungwon and please make sure to check out our links in this description and like, share, subscribe, and comment! till next time!!
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AUTHORS NOTE » lol UMMMMMMM sorry guys i didnt realize how long it had been without an update WE ARE SO BACK THO
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Episode 1. Season 1 (Pilot)
The Big Bang
Come follow me to luxury
Gold on the floors
And all over me
Warnings: MDNI!! Profanity, mentions of violence, adult themes, use of the n-word, use of the b-word, themes of infidelity
Summary: Not every princess lived in a castle. Terry learns this when he meets what he considers a celestial being in the dirtiest of places. Too enamored, he forgets about all his spoken promises to another.
"AND ACTION" 🎬
There's always a comfort that comes with having options, especially if every option benefits you. It didn't matter how miniscule the situation may be, having options just made it all the better.
A man like Terry was one that believed options to be a luxury. He wished he had that luxury when life struck a butcher knife to his heart and ordered him to walk like it didn't hurt. Maybe then, if he had options, he would've picked a butter knife instead. And maybe then, he wouldn't have needed to experience hell or high waters.
So it's understandable that he felt a tinge of discomfort when that luxury was taken away from him, maybe a little irritated. Here he stood, with two of his friends (dumb friends, might he add), first in line to enter what he would describe as the dingiest strip clubs he has ever seen, not that he’s seen many. Now, Terry has been in worse predicaments than this, he's been in places that looked way more… unsightly than this.
It was just the subtle air, a foreboding feeling that washes over him as he looked at the club doors, that made him think that he could have spent his bachelor party at home instead, by himself. Nothing appealing came from watching strippers dancing anyway… for him at least.
“So you tellin’ me you couldn't have picked a less shady place? Looks like it's bout to rain bullets here.”
Or maybe he was just paranoid. Three years of therapy could only do as much as you let it, and Terrence Richmond? Well, he didn't let it do much for him.
“I just wanna see some ass shake man, all them fancy strip clubs have the bitches with no ass. They not even pretty in the face.” Rome exaggerated, chewing the gun in his mouth so loudly, Terry had the right mind to knock him out.
“Nigga, you dense as fuck. This that shit that got you that STD.” Yosohn shook his head as he schooled Rome, not that Rome was open to listening.
Terry met Rome and Yosohn a year after moving to Georgia. Rome being the big mouth he was, got a little mouthy with Terry and almost got knocked out clean. Yosohn spoke on behalf of his friend, then weirdly, they became friends. Although they weren't the type of company he would normally surround himself with, they were great distractions when life didn't seem worth living. Them and his fiancé.
“Man, I ain't ever telling you shit. This why Ronda left yo ass. Let's get inside before I crash out on you, blowing my high.”
Yeah, amazing distractions.
It smelled better than expected really. While Terry expected a cacosmic mixture of perfumes, sweat and vomit. It smelled like sweet cherry liquor, only a little bit of sweat and it seemed every woman here used the same perfume because it smelled all the same to him.
The interior of the club was very… busy. Not a shocking resolution, it was a strip club. Just a little uncomfortable, the three men had to bump, push and wedge between drunk bodies to get to the small booth Rome booked.
“Man, look at all this. Tell me you don't want that Terry.” Rome tilted his head downwards as one girl, seemingly a dancer, walked past him. Terry just gives Rome a blank look, “You don't ever get tired of talkin’?”
Yosohn's shoulders shook, head thrown downwards. Rome was clearly the most talkative out of all three, and while Yosohn matched his energy sometimes, it got a little unbearable at times. But what made him laugh was how he shut up as Terry spoke to him, until this day, Rome doesn't dare cross a line with the large man.
“Fuck you laughin’ at? Bald-headed motherfucker. Yo beard patchy as fuck, go take some Minoxidil.” Terry couldn't help but laugh at that. Their banter is always something worth watching.
Raunchy music dripped from the speakers as dancers performed praise-worthy tricks on the poles at the main stage. With hands digging deep into his pockets, he bopped his head to the catchy beat of the music. Not his usual taste, but anything was better than standing there looking awkward.
Rome had long disappeared, Terry wasn't sure if it was the bar he went to, or perhaps he followed behind a dancer. “Let's get you a drink man, can't even act like you enjoying yourself.” Yosohn shook his head at how sad the man looked. “It's cause I'm not.” Terry retorted with a small chuckle, the first he's given since being away from his fiancé.
Alas after a few drinks, Terry has let a little loose. His teeth were on display more, his shoulders slack and his hands out of his pockets.
There were a few girls in the booth with them, Terry didn't care to entertain either of them though. Courtesy of the club, they sent them a bottle with knowledge of the occasion, and of course, that was thanks to Rome.
The DJ kept announcing the arrival of dancers on stage for solo performances. All which had patrons screaming and throwing money on the stage, painting it green with Benjamins. Clearly this was a generous crowd.
It wasn't until the music changed into something slow and sensual that his attention perked towards the stage. The lights have changed to warm,dim, orange, then queued the DJ. “Aight, y'all already know what time it is. Let's get into some slow seduction with one of your favourites… Indigo.”
Except this time the crowd was quiet. Not a single scream, just sublime silence. “Yo, what's this wack ass shit? We don't wanna hear this slow shit.” Silence that Rome had no problem breaking.
Terry couldn't help but internally agree, because this was a strip club. There was a specific aesthetic that strip clubs had, and slow wasn't one of them. The crowd wasn't silent in boredom though, they were attentive, staring directly at the stage. He notices how not a single phone was out, just wide eyes and anticipating smiles.
He wondered why until he registered the soft melody of Victoria Monét's “Big Boss” playing through the speakers, and there was Indigo.
A hand on the pole as she walked around it, before climbing up. A gold set was on her, glitter stuck to her skin. Just as the song recited. She resonated a bright star as she twirled on the pole with skill.
Her black tresses flowed around her in controlled movements. Her movements weren't as sharp, quick or as ‘sexy’ as the other dancers. Her movements were smooth, sensual and hypnotising. She didn't let the pole control her, instead the pole gave her every command and she obliged willingly.
Indigo wasn't dancing to seduce. She danced to engage, to captivate. She captured more than just her audience's eyes, she captured their hearts and their minds. She commanded everyone to silence. The small smile on her face as she danced made her all the more ethereal, there was no way on this damned earth that a beauty like that existed. Not when mundane people like himself existed. Was it possible to co-exist with such an entity? That much was unbeknownst to Terry.
She had taken so much of his attention, that he did not notice when her set was over. The party was back up again once everyone regained their composure, everyone except him because his friends had to shake him out of his trance.
“Yo Terry, you good bro? This nigga gone.” Yosohn laughed at Terry, but truthfully, he understood him. Indigo was a beauty yet to be reckoned with. It took him a while to shake out of it after watching the dancer perform.
“Now that's the kind of hoe you turn into a housewife.” Rome comments, still glancing at where Indigo had exited the stage.
“Aye Rome, Terry gone bruh.” Yosohn doubled over as he took a short video of Terry. Rome reached over and slightly smacked the big man out of it. And immediately, old Terry was back to mugging and grunting.
“Don't get fucked up.” He muttered to Rome, before glancing back to the stage again. “Oh hell no, bring her back on stage. Big ass attitude. I hope Amber cheating on yo ass.”
A drunk Yosohn was sliding off the sofa in laughter. Terry smacks his teeth before taking a sip of his whiskey. His mind was racing, eyes twitching as his leg began bouncing. He needed another fix of seeing Indigo and suddenly he understood the crowd, the silence. The need to capture that moment in its entirety, because Terry thought it was short… too short. *She just got on stage.*
“Who was that?” He asked, nobody in particular, as long as he would get an answer, he didn't care who it came from. “That's Indigo, she been dancing here for a couple years. Pretty as fuck, as you see. I think her-” Yosohn answers before Rome interrupts. “And greedy as fuck too, you forgot to add that.” Yosohn rolls his eyes, “She rejected him, don't mind him. Anyway, think her real name Senia or some shit like that.”
Terry hums, eyebrows twitching subtly. Now his mind was treading on dangerous territory, wanting to know how he could get to see her again, right now. “She do private dances?”
The mere question has Rome and Yosohn shocked. Terrence Richmond had lost all sense of composure at that moment, that he didn't care much about looking a little too invested.
“Huh? You tryna fuck up before your wedding day? Yeah no, let's bounce.” Yosohn shook his head, being the angel on Terry's one shoulder, and of course, Rome would play devil's advocate. “Bro what? Stop being lame, it's his last day single, one lil dance not gon hurt. Amber probably doin’ the same shit.” Rome waved his hand in dismissal. “He's not single dumb ass nigga.”
The two continued going back and forth, they didn't even notice Terry getting up. “Hey man, I was wondering if I could get a private dance.” He questioned the bouncer who stood near velvet curtains. The bouncer mugs Terry, “Nigga, do I look like a stripper to you? Fuck you asking me for?”
Terry sighs, how the fuck was he supposed to know who and what to ask. His thick brows furrow and his lips curl downwards before looking around. The bouncer sighs, the man was clearly new to this.
“Who you lookin’ for?” His ears perk, head whips in the bouncer's direction. Wasn't even the slightest bit embarrassed in his pursuit of finding her. “Indigo.”
The bouncer nodded with a hum, his request was very much understandable. Sticking his head in the curtains, he yells the stripper’s name. It wasn't long until she appeared again that Terry felt his heart skip a beat. The stage did not do her any justice, because even now under dim lights that made it hard to see, Indigo still looked jaw-dropping. “What’s up Nyx, who is this?”
Her southern accent was thick, the drawl did something to his chest that had him wondering if he had a heart condition. “He askin’ for a dance, baby.”
The dark-skinned beauty raised a perfectly trimmed brow in Terry’s direction. “Oh is that right?” she asked the man himself, and the smile on her face was enough to send him into cardiac arrest. “Yes ma’am.” Terry retorts with a smile of his own, close-lipped and gentle.
Eyes glazing across her features, Indigo laughs at his politeness. It wasn’t often she met someone as polite as him when asking for a dance. “It’s gon’ cost you.”, a declaration. Terry found that wooing more than anything, “That’s fine. I’m willing.”
They stare at one another for a while, while Indigo seemed to be sizing him up, Terry was tracing her face, pocketing the memory in a place where everything felt nostalgic, because Terry couldn't help but feel something familiar about her. A feeling he shook off because now he sounded stupid.
Indigo hums, that was also a response she didn’t hear often, but she wouldn’t dare complain. “I’ll keep that in mind, c’mon baby.”
"AND CUT" 🎬
Note: Not as long as I would have liked, but I also beat a record... so win some lose some?
Yosohn pronounced. Yo-shawn. I'm extra...
This will be an angsty series revolving around uncomfortable matters. Infidelity. Like I said in my last post, I do not condone it, and neither should anyone.
This is purely fiction.
Hope you enjoy this, I'm honestly really invested. That playlist I made is really doing what it's supposed to.
Playlist here if you're interested. Hope you enjoyed the first part.
#Spotify#terry richmond#terry richmond fic#terry richmond fanfiction#terry richmond x oc#terry richmond x black oc#black female oc#black women#terry richmond angst#aaron pierre
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Sword gays showdown, round 4 of bracket two
Propaganda:
For Hikaru Sulu:
1) Okay, first off: Which version am I submitting? Prime timeline (TOS) or Kelvin timeline (AOS, also known as the reboot movies if you're not in the fandom)? The answer is both. Prime Sulu has the more iconic fencing scenes (and is also said to have other sword related abilities) while Kelvin Sulu is canonically gay. Specifically as a tribute to George Takei btw who played prime Sulu in TOS and is famously gay and an LGBT+ rights activist among other causes. The picture provided is prime Sulu but if you've only watched AOS, feel free to vote for him anyway.
I'm not gonna link any videos here since that would probably exceed the scope of the propaganda section but clips should be pretty easy to find. And if you can't, just trust me: The TOS fencing scenes are amazing. The AOS one is probably fine too but it's been ages since I've watched it and I forgot it even existed so it can't have been THAT memorable.
Fun fact: George Takei initially didn't know how to fence and didn't find out he'd have to until pretty late and started taking fencing lessons only three weeks before the filming of that episode (The Naked Time) and apparently "became so out-of-control and boisterous that he had to be separated from the rest of the production personnel, for their own safety" which, in context of what the episode is about, is just absolutely amazing. Truly iconic.
Anyway, considering Star Trek is an important part of queer history (I'm only half joking) you need to vote for Sulu, we all know George Takei is an icon, make the right choice here.
2) When they got hit with the drunk virus he took his shirt off and started challenging people to duels. Iconic
3) This bitch got the outer space disease that makes you silly, and revealed they were gung ho for fencing, and brought out their sabre to just. Swashbuckle. Goes "/oh my/," and is clearly gay and played by a gay actor
For Olivier:
She is only female general in her nation, and guards the northern border. She fights with a sword even though there are other people with guns. Olivier is unmarried despite being older (not sure how old exactly, but she is a general, and that takes time). To the best of my knowledge she shows no interest in anyone, thus making it possible to interpret her as aromantic and asexual, or as a lesbian. The bit where Mustang offers to take her on a date and she threatens to eat so much she will bankrupt him is funny.
#sword gays showdown#hikaru sulu#star trek#star trek aos#star trek tos#olivier mira armstrong#fullmetal alchemist#fullmetal alchemist brotherhood
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Alrighty! @number-one-shadisper-shipper and I binged the Knuckles series today, so time for thoughts! SPOILER ALERT.
I'll admit the show wasn't perfect. I've seen the negative reviews, and I kinda get where they come from. BUT! I did enjoy this show greatly! And I'm not here to complain. Time for some happy thoughts, y'all! 💙🤩
I think you need to have a love, not just tolerance, for the SCU in order to properly enjoy this show. I do have such, so I had a lot of fun with it.
There were definitely scenes from every episode that had me either squealing, laughing, crying, or flipping out. But my favorite was likely the first episode, because come on, we saw the Wachowski family! Most of them, anyway! While I missed Tom's presence, I was grateful for that comment from Maddie about him being "out of town," so he wasn't just gone for no reason.
The SECOND it showed our three space babies hanging out together in their room?! I SCREAMED. THE BOYS!!!!
Tails sitting on his bed tinkering with one of his gizmos, Sonic rocking out to music with an air guitar, and Knuckles exercising from one of the ceiling planks. IT'S THEM!!! They're just hanging out, doing their thing, looking oh so much like brothers. And Sonic's narration at the beginning was GOLD. 🤣💙
Even though we didn't get enough of Maddie being a parent, we definitely got a nice chunk for it only lasting part of an episode. Maddie called Knuckles "one of our kids" (that had me SCREECHING). The angry mama vibes were GOLDEN. 🤣 The way she made breakfast for them, the "Boys, breakfast is ready!" I love the normalcy of it! Can't wait to see more in the future! (Her calling to them with "boys" is somehow just the sweetest thing and I'm melting.)
The poor mailman being like "I just wanna go home, man" 🤣
We were right, fellas, Knuckles had no idea what being grounded meant. 🤣 Although the way Sonic piped up with "Oh, I definitely know what it means," has me suspecting that Sonic himself has gotten grounded a decent amount before. 😂
Knuckles trying to talk back, and Maddie going, "ExCUSE ME?!" then just making those tiny, terrifying noises and Sonic being like "Bro don't mess with Mom when she's mad" (okay, he didn't say "mom" and that made me sad, but the mom vibes were 110% there so I'm here for it). 😂 And since Knuckles snuck out and later Wade said, several times, "Aren't you grounded?" seems to confirm that this entire show is basically what Knuckles does when he's grounded. 🤣 Although ... his comment about not being able to be grounded because he had no home made me very sad. 😭
I did not have an issue with so much Wade screentime! Sure, he isn't my favorite SCU character, but I love what this show did with him! I'd already seen his moments in the movies (like nearly shooting Robotnik in the face with an actual handgun). I like how they gave him actual family issues; a dad who abandoned him and his family, a realistic sister, a mom. Bad family memories. Awkward reunions. They could've made it a joke, but they didn't, and I greatly appreciate that. Especially since I've witnessed firsthand how painful family separations can be. 😔
All the emotional talks Wade and Knuckles had caught me off guard in the best way! The way they talked about their different family issues, the way they talked of betrayal from friends, and being left alone, hit way harder than I was prepared for. Especially that talk they had at the burger place in the middle of the night? Oof. Good talk right there.
Also, even though they took a "show don't tell" take with it, I loved how Knuckles relaxed more and more throughout the show. In the beginning, he couldn't rest, he couldn't sit back and have a genuine good time. But the more he hung out with Wade and his family, the more he learned. He learned about music and found "his jam" (that was literally amazing btw). He watched movies with Mrs. Whipple and ate snacks in the hotel room in Reno and watched more movies. He had his teenager moments of rolling his eyes and rebelling, but he was so well portrayed here, I loved it. I felt for him.
Despite the bizarre nature of the episode "Flames of Disaster," (we were cracking up so hard) I'm trying to glean bits of the truth of Knuckles's story from the crazy musical play that Pachacamac put on in Wade's dream. I mean, "Longclaw" and her tribe were there, and ... what the heck was that giant demon thing?! Iblis?! Does our Knuckles Wachowski have an actual history with freaking Iblis?!?! 😱🔥
I was deeply intrigued by the two main antagonists, especially at the implication that G.U.N. did seem to exist before the events of the first movie?! Did it exist, get disbanded after the Maria incident, then get reformed?! My brain is exploding. 🤯 I was even more shocked that they apparently died? I guess I shouldn't be surprised, the Wachowski kids don't seem to have much qualms about getting rid of the baddies for good as the game versions do. That was a terrifying phenomenon, what happened with the two rings. 🫣
And then the Buyer getting crushed by the giant glass ball 👀
Although in those last two episodes, I admit I was freaking out and legitimately near tears at Wade's seemingly having to "betray" Knuckles. Before the reveal that all was in good communication, all I could think was how relaxed Knuckles finally seemed, chilling in the hotel room, being excited about whatever Wade wanted to "show" him, questioning whether it was a song, him declaring that he was going to bring his favorite hat, 🥹 all I could think was of their previous discussions about betrayal from friends and family, and when Knuckles called Wade "my friend" right before the elevator doors closed, I just about sobbed. I was like "please, don't let him be betrayed, don't let him have come all this way and relaxed so much only to get 'betrayed' once again by someone he's come to consider a friend." 😭 We heaved a HUGE sigh of relief when it revealed he was aware of the trap the whole time. 😪
Maternal instincts went nuts when he got so badly hurt in that final battle 😭 I literally reached for the screen several times and was right back to almost weeping 🥲 And someone tell me I wasn't the only one noticing the parallel in that scene with Wade standing in front of his unconscious body the way Tom did with Sonic in the first movie. That, PLUS Knuckles's epic comeback, and his retrieval of his own power?!?! EPIC!!!!
The ending was abrupt, sure, but the pure joy on Knuckles's face after everything as he jumped up to high five Wade was just too sweet. 🥹
So yes, even though I would have loved just a little more, a return to Green Hills, a reunion with Maddie, Sonic, and Tails, I adored this show. It was a wild ride, full of laughs, tears, excited screeching, etc. 💙💛❤️ I don't care what anyone says, nothing will make me hate it.
#sonic the hedgehog#sonic#knuckles series#knuckles series spoilers#spoilers#knuckles#knuckles show#knuckles wachowski#sonic wachowski#tails wachowski#maddie wachowski#the buyer#review#positivity#positive review#IT WAS SO MUCH FREAKING FUN#sonic cinematic universe#scu#wade whipple#no hate to wade you hear me#none#any hate replies or anything will be deleted#this is a positivity zone#i am here to have fun not complain#i will have all the fun and no one can stop me#sth
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the more i think about tua s4 the more it’s like. wow they really just lost steam after the first four episodes huh? like the first four weren’t amazing necessarily, but there was some interesting stuff being set up. i wanted to see what would go on with ben and jennifer, or where the hell five and lila were, or how they would fix some dynamics within the group like between klaus and allison. and i thought gene and jean were kind of good villains, like they were just on the classic tua spectrum of funny, unsettling, and weird. and then it’s like they just didn’t know how to wrap any of it up. like i would fully believe that the ending of the show was not how they meant to conclude it, but they couldn’t think how else to “fix” things in so little time. the five and lila thing i still just really don’t get the purpose of, but it did still feel very rushed and maybe the writers didn’t want to try and figure anything else out about the subway thing they created and five’s new powers being connected to it. and that problem is solved if they have five and lila give up looking (no matter how out of character it is for both of them) and create some lame sibling drama to fill the screen time they could’ve used to explain any of their own world building. not to mention that they then go “oh actually none of it matters anyway because they’re gonna destroy all those timelines and there will just be one real one”- which now that i think about it is another plot hole but that’s another post.
anyway. i guess what i’m trying to say is that some of season 4 was fine. like. the “you’re a good brother” moment from diego to five who looks a little guilty yet touched bc he knows he’s still kind of lying to diego, but he also knows if he were in lila’s position he wouldn’t want his partner to just be told that he’s getting himself into dangerous situations again like that? that’s good. that’s diego, lila, and five’s dynamic right there. lila thinking it’s absolutely hilarious that diego would ever think she’s cheating on him with five? that works, because it is ridiculous. and lila and five both sneaking into the keepers meetings at the start was very in-character for both of them as well. they’re the two former commission agents who get bored with normal life very easily (another reason it makes no sense to have them settle down with each other, lmao). it’s like they understood the three of them decently well before the fifth episode, and when it started they just kind of lost the plot. so i personally will just be ignoring the last two episodes. diego and five love each other even if they are both very grumpy sometimes. and diego and lila still have communication problems but they also are never going to leave each other (and hey, even david castañeda understood that). and then five and lila are commission frenemies who on some level still can’t stand each other but also know they need to work together a lot of the time. and i’m sure they and the rest of the umbrellas figure everything out and stop the fourth apocalypse and live happily ever after. the end.
#tua#the umbrella academy#tua s4#tua season 4#the umbrella academy s4#the umbrella academy season 4#to be clear i know there were other like arcs and stuff not wrapped up very nicely#but i still think if they had six more episodes instead of TWO then they could’ve been#and also these are just the ones i’ve been the most bothered by#bc i have biases.#tua spoilers#the umbrella academy spoilers#five hargreeves#diego hargreeves#lila pitts#aylo talks#mine
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Full Audio Transcript (6.17.24)
The following episode contains potentially disturbing content and we want to alert trauma survivors. It contains material that for some may be difficult to discuss or listen to.
This is He Said, Ella Dijo with Eric Winter (EW) and Rosalind Sanchez (RS).
RS: Como estas, Eric?
EW: Oh, bien bien, and you?
RS: Hoy tenemos una persona muy especial, mi gente. Guys, we are, I know you don't, but you're learning. We are excited about our guest today. He's an actor currently on ABC's 911, which is a huge show.
EW: In the ABC family.
RS: Yes, you may know him from Step Up dance films or from playing the sexy boy next door opposite Jennifer Lopez.
EW: That's right, we have Ryan Guzman. He's here with us today to talk about his new film, The Present, out tomorrow. We're excited not only to dive into his career, but so many other personal things he's opened up about—mental health, his career, so many other things he's been talking about. So let's bring him in.
RS: Yeah, looking forward to Ryan Guzman.
Ryan Guzman (RG): How you guys doing? You guys sweating in that room?
EW: Yeah, man, it's been hot in here. We don't want that air running because you're gonna hear it in the background. So we're just like, this is all for you, Ryan. We're just gonna be sweating the whole podcast.
RS: My armpits almost stink, I hate it!
EW: Yeah, that's great. Great way to open up the podcast.
RS: It’s terrible. Anyways, we're so happy that you are joining us. Thank you so much for doing this.
EW: Yeah, fellow ABC star now. I know you guys jumped over from Fox. You're now on the network where I'm at.
RG: Yeah.
EW: How's that transition been? Has it been weird? I've never been a part of a show that jumped networks. Did it feel totally seamless to you?
RG: Honestly, I've never been a part of something like this either. I mean, I've been on four other TV shows and this one—it felt like a revamp for our show. So it's just like, as soon as we went from Fox to ABC, all of this promotional that we've never even seen in six seasons happened.
EW: Yeah, like a relaunch almost.
RG: Yeah, it was a relaunch. So it was, you know, a blessing. We're all grateful for it.
EW: Which is great. You guys came out with a bang. The ratings were great. You guys were sitting pretty in a good position.
RS: How many seasons now?
RG: Now we're gonna be going on our eighth.
RS: And you've been part of it since the very beginning?
RG: Since the second season.
RS: Since the second, wow, long gig. That's awesome. Good for you!
RG: It happened perfect timing right before I was about to have my first born.
EW: Really?
RS: Oh my God, perfect.
EW: Congrats. So your first born is how old then right now?
RG: Five.
EW: Five. And you have just one right now? You have a second?
RG: No, two. Yeah, I have two. I have a three year old. Little boy, Mateo and my baby girl, Genevieve.
RS: Oh, that's beautiful.
EW: Changes your perspective on everything, right?
RG: Amplified everything. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I'm also losing hair quicker than I'd like, but.
RS: Yeah. We just did a podcast and we were talking about parenthood, you know, and generational trauma and how I understand my mom now that I'm fifty-one more than ever. You know? My whole life, it was all about, I don't get her. I don't get it. I don't get her. Why, why, why? And now as a mom of a twelve-year-old girl, I just go, okay, now I get my mom.
EW: Yeah, you're not there yet. You're getting some challenges, I'm sure. You know that they say with the terrible twos, the terrible threes, the fucking fours, the fucking fives. That's it! It'll beep those curse words out. But I mean, there's challenges at every level, but there's also so many blessings and so much fun.
RG: Yeah, I'm sure right now as a twelve-year-old girl in this day and age—I'm sure it's insane.
RS: It is work. It's a little work. It's beautiful, listen, it's delicious, it's amazing. She's awesome. We have a little star. She's a tennis player. She's a good girl. But she is so fierce. She's fiercely independent, and she's at the age that I know everything and you don't know anything and just leave me alone because I am finding who I am. And sometimes you want to slap her and be like, you don't know, you don't know shit. So it's interesting.
EW: Let me ask you this, Ryan, because we were just having a conversation about our son is very, very passive. And I mean, he's coming out of his shell more and more, but we have some good friends that started their kids at a very young age in jujitsu and all these things that are just great training grounds to learn for self-esteem, for self-defense, for all these things, right? You grew up doing taekwondo, correct? Got your black belt in taekwondo. Started where you were like around eight, am I right? In that range?
RG: Yeah, it was my seventh year old birthday I started, yeah.
EW: What was the reason that, was that just, why not, I'm gonna try something new? Or was there something that prompted you to go, ah, taekwondo, I wanna jump in?
RG: Way too many Bruce Lee films.
EW: Yeah, I was gonna say, because I used to love watching movies like that too and get excited. So that—it just became a cool thing. You're like, I wanna do it.
RG: It was, honestly, it was everything. Bruce Lee was my idol, he still is my idol. From the philosophical to the physical, it was just a key component in my own evolution. So as I got to read more books, I mean, I was a young kid reading Bruce Lee books and Richard Marchenko books, which are Navy Seal books. I don't know why my interest led me there, but I feel like I needed that kind of structure. And that structure has been such an incredible foundation for, I mean, all of the success that I've been able to be grateful to get. So I highly advise every parent to put their kids into Jiu-Jitsu, wrestling at least, if not some Taekwondo or karate or some kind of martial arts, especially if you're a boy.
RS: I told you.
EW: I'm open to it. I have no problem with it.
RS: We just talked about this.
EW: I have no problem with that. I just know my kid's not gonna do it yet. He's six. I just know like his personality. He did a version of like a Taekwondo for a bit. He lasted, it was like, you know, little kids running around.”
RS: No he never—he did karate.
EW: Well karate. I think it was Taekwondo.
RS: No, it was karate.
EW: It was for sure a blend.
RS: Really?
EW: For sure a blend, it wasn't just straight cut. But he did it for a few years and then kind of got bored, right? And like with any discipline, it takes a lot of work, a lot of patience. I think the age you started feels like a pretty solid age to dive into something that takes that much focus and patience as well to learn.
RS: Did they get hurt though? At six and at seven, when you see them fighting and doing Jiu Jitsu, that is such a physical and a contact sport, do they get hurt?
RG: Yeah, I mean, they can get hurt, but they can also heal really quick. They're young. So I mean, when I was doing Taekwondo, I ended up sparring guys that were like actually twenty-years old to even my master and actually got taken out of—what was it?—a tournament because I broke my hand trying to break, I'm trying to block one of his kicks.
EW: Oh wow.
RS: Oh no.
RG: Yeah. I would say there's different, you know, personality types. I think from one to six, it's less about the structure and less about the discipline. It's more about play.
EW: Yeah.
RG: How can you allow them to feel comfortable in their own bodies and know their movement and then play with this now new martial art? And then after that, then yeah, you start to develop more structure and discipline and say, this is, you know, we got to tame the mind before we tame the body. And you start to understand a little bit more of why it's called an art, martial art.
EW: And when you first started competing, what age were you when you jumped in and then you started fighting, taking shots?
RG: I think it was right away. I was like, I'm around maybe eight, nine. Yeah, around that time.
EW: You learn life lessons quick, right? Like Mike Tyson says, everybody's got a plan till you get punched in the face. Then you have to figure it out.
RG: Yeah, yeah, I wanted to be quick. I wanted to be powerful. And I think another reason why I liked Bruce Lee so much is he was a tiny man. He wasn't a massive, like Michael Jai White kind of guy. So he was able to demand respect just off of his own technique. And I thought, you know, okay, I need to copy that. Technique can beat power and strength or technique can beat strength. So I ended up doing that and proving to myself like, oh, even at eight years old, I can be a force. And as soon as I started doing actual sparring, I just kind of fell in love with it, with the competition of it.”
RS: So Taekwondo and then MMA, right? Because you did a little bit of MMA. So all this is just fighting. When did acting came to the table? Like, and how?
RG: The acting was something I never even thought of coming from Sacramento, I mean, that's not even something that we talk about out there. And it's either martial arts or working for the state or an automotive job. But none of that called me. I was doing modeling in San Francisco. I got offered to do a photo shoot in LA, and I just asked my modeling agency from San Fran to hook me up with an agency in LA, not knowing the racket that modeling is. And I stayed in a one bedroom with five guys creating a massive amount of debt before I learned there was commercials and there was acting available. And I think the competitive streak just kind of clicked. And I was like, well, I want to get out of this situation. That seems to be making a lot more money. And this is the time and day where commercials—the nationals were actually bringing in some money. I don't know if the landscape's the same anymore.”
EW: It's very different for sure.
RG: Yeah, so I was very fortunate at the time to catch the tail end of that. And then I remember being a new twenty-three year old in LA. I'm going to clubs, I'm enjoying, I'm having a great time. And I'm seeing some of the guys that are being successful as actors. And they're kind of like, they were idiots, to be honest. So I was like, how are these guys, you know, so successful? Like I got to try this acting thing out. And I remember I didn't have enough money to download scripts. So I would just take the same page or pages that I had in my place and I'd write my own scripts off of the internet. And I would invite two or three, maybe even five guys over to the house, and I'd just start doing those scenes in front of them. And that was kind of my acting class. And then I went and auditioned for a manager, didn't get that manager, got another one who is my manager today. Three months after that, I booked the lead in Step Up and my life forever changed.
RS: Oh my God. So it was fast.
RG: Within nine months. So yeah.
RS: That's incredible. Good for you. That's incredible.”
EW: I can relate to your journey in a lot of ways. I had a similar—I went from sports to modeling to the same thing, curiosity with acting, reading different books about acting, seeing people do commercials. And like you said, back in the day, you could do one national commercial and if it was a good one, you could actually make your living for the year off of just one commercial. And little by little, just very, very similar path. I didn't get one big movie out the gate that changed my career. It took a lot of grinding. That's an amazing blessing to have something like that happen. And then you have to balance the ebbs and flows of this business at that point, right?
RS: The dancing was just organic to you? Or you were a dancer? A lot of people have that question. Does he really dance?
RG: It was something, I think it's—culturally, I don't know, just being Mexican-American, I was literally raised with my family going to do, like Quinces' [Quinceañeras], or like just parties in general, we'd always dance. And it was less about the one, two, three, ba, one, two, like doing any kind of structured kind of stuff, more of the feel. And I've always loved dancing, but never on that level.
RS: How was it having to follow choreography?
RG: It was kind of like fighting. I put it next to it because the amount of hours we did—we did eight hours every single day for about two, three months. I remember seeing the guy that, and I feel bad because I gave him such a hard time. He was supposed to be my dance double, but my competitive streak was just like, no, no, no. I gotta be that guy. So I would do the eight hours with everybody and then I'd videotape our session and I'd go home and I'd do another two, three hours by myself. And just go over and over, and then I ended up being in every scene.
RS: That's awesome.
EW: Good for you.
RS: Have you done a movie playing a fighter, like an MMA, a boxer or something like that? Have you done that already?
RG: I've not. I've wanted to for the longest time. And I don't know if—I think it'll come. Everything's happening for a reason. I believe in... to, actually what you were saying earlier, getting that job right out the gate, it was overwhelming. It was too much for me at the time. I wasn't ready to be catapulted in the way I was. And I wasn't an actor really. I wasn't really a dancer. I had kind of just been fooling everybody.
RS: How old were you?
RG: I was twenty-three.
RS: Oh baby, okay.
RG: Yeah, so I'm brand new with all this.
EW: Months in, like you said, months in.
RG: Yeah, and everybody's thinking that I'm this thing and I'm kind of taking it. My ego was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe I am. And then reality kind of checked me and the next movie I did and two movies after that were bombs and I realized I don't know anything about this business. So I would say up until maybe three years ago, I didn't really call myself an actor and I was just lucky to count my stars that I was amongst other actors that were like a Jennifer Lopez or working with the Richard Linklater and now Glenn Powell being who he is now. So just super grateful that I got the time and maybe the hustle that I had, those combined allowed me to stay and have some longevity in this career.
RS: Did you get caught up in the whole business—the ugly dark side of Hollywood because you were so young and it came so fast?
RG: I didn't get caught up, but I definitely got put onto it, and it quickly showed me I want no part of it. That's why I kind of say to myself, I stay with my kids. I rarely do any press, but that was just like, the fame game was never something... I don't want to be seen too much and then have to speak in front of thousands of people as if I'm speaking for them. I can only speak for myself and my experience and hopefully people connect to it. But I saw a lot of people that were not necessarily skilled in any asset becoming really famous and rich. And it kind of just wasn't feeding anything other than a hole in the soul. So it kind of made me go a different direction.
RS: That's amazing.
EW: Do you remember on your climb at any point—maybe an older actor you came across that maybe, maybe not a full mentor—but somebody who guided you or gave you some words of wisdom early on that might have helped you navigate this business or any of that even failed you and just set you back going, oh, that was a horrible example of somebody on set? You don't have to name names if you don't want, but I'm just curious if you had people that hit those marks.
RG: I've definitely been blessed to be, I mean, I've worked with some of the greats, Edward James Olmos, Jennifer Lopez, I mean, Juliette Lewis. I've worked [with] some amazing actors and actresses. I could, yeah, I would never name names, but I have gotten some really good advice and some really like [makes a noise] advice. And... so grateful for the good advice. Eddie Olmos has given me some incredible advice. He's just a sound individual.
EW: He's a great human.
RG: Yeah, and his son, Michael Olmos, another sound individual. But I think it was just on all aspects—just stay true to you. I think that's the general narrative that I've gotten from plenty of other individuals. It's just, no one can do you. And your uniqueness is meant to kind of shine in its own unique way. So if you're trying to be—I can't be Antonio Banderas I can't be, even though I'm a Latin actor, I can't be somebody else that's already had that role. I need to just kind of explore myself and allow that to shine, and that's what I feel like I'm just starting to tap into these past couple of years. So I'm really excited to see where it goes.”
RS: Before we talk about your movie coming out tomorrow—and listen, we don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, because we want to be very respectful—but we read that and you came out openly saying that you had to deal with some mental situations, and you battle a little bit of depression at some point in your life. Only if you want to talk about it, otherwise we don't have to. I was just very curious, where did depression come from? If you even know.
RG: Yeah, I've spent many, many years dissecting where the depression has come from, and it's essentially from people pleasing. It's a trauma coping mechanism that I started a long time ago when I was a child, and I didn't even realize it. And it's kind of these things that I'm aware of now raising my own children to give them less to work on later on in life and give them a better foundation. But yeah, as I got older, I started to realize that I was people pleasing so much to a detriment that I had nothing left for myself. And I've even watched old interviews and where I'm smiling the whole time and trying to say the right thing and do the right thing and be the perfect individual, be the all-American boy, and that's not who I really am. I'm flawed and I have my own issues, and I think being raised a Mexican-American man who's not supposed to tap into his feelings or understand them, let alone, that set me back a lot. So I came to a point about seven years ago where I reached my limit, and I had just seen my parents' divorce. I had just gone through a horrible relationship, and I was looking around for some kind of aid, somebody to be there, and no one was there.
And I realized that I had been leaning on the wrong people. So feeling that lonely, feeling like you wake up and you just know what's gonna happen every single day is just kind of a time suck and it's quicksand, and that's how the depression kind of starts. And luckily, I got a second chance, and from that moment forward, it kind of just awoken—I awoke into something new, something better and a path towards a purpose. So. Yeah.
RS: The second chance came from within, from a person, from a book?
RG: The second chance came from my attempt at not working. So I'm a very extremist person type, and right after my attempt did not work, I just started crying like crazy. And I was in a horrible environment. Somebody was yelling at the other side of the door. You know, just horrible things were happening at the time. And then after I stopped crying, I remember sitting on my bed and just having this moment of like this epiphany. You can't ever be the same. You got to be something different because you've already reached the absolute limit with this type of person you are. You got to deconstruct, break everything down because the foundation you've been building on is so fractured and cracked. And for the last six, seven years now, I've broken myself down and try to stay as humble as I possibly can and look at all the horrible things about me and then kind of start from there and rebuild and heal and allow myself to be a different individual and actually show and implore people to change via changing myself.
RS: That's amazing.
EW: Yeah, thank you for sharing that. I think a lot of our listeners will gain a lot just hearing. Maybe they don't go through something to the extent you went through, but everybody deals with some sort of down moment, whether it gets as far as a deep depression or not, and a lot of people don't know how to even pull out of the simplest thing. And you, like you said, hit a level of rock bottom and had that epiphany. Thank God. Now, I mean, you're a dad and you have so much to offer your children and let alone your own— yourself and your life. You have so much more to do—so thank you for sharing that. That's powerful.
RS: I'm assuming spirituality is very important in your life at the moment.
RG: Yes. Yes. Yeah. That's part of my purpose as well. I was raised a Catholic. I was an altar boy at one point in time. I went into the seminary for a little bit. And then I kind of disassociated with the church and religion in general. I saw the underbelly of it. But yeah, my spirituality is—I started to reread the Bible and tap back into my spirituality and just be open to Eastern and Western, allowing all forms to kind of really like be permeable. So I think there's so much to this life that to say that you know it all is kind of cutting yourself off of so much opportunity and abundance. Yeah, so that's kind of where I'm at right now. Just—I'm exploring that with like-minded individuals, and propelling love rather than fear, so.
EW: It's great that you're putting all this into perspective in your life now because especially—I know every business has challenges, but I think in a business like ours, where so many people—their happiness hinges on the ups and the false belief that people around you have all the time—and the moment you don't deliver, the moment people's attitudes or perceptions of you change, or the moments—it's such a roller coaster emotionally, the business that we're in, that a lot of people, I think, aspire or want—they want it so bad because they see fame, they see that meaning, the all-encompassing success. You must be happy because people know who you are. It's like nobody has to know who you are to be happy.
I like what you said—just staying out of press unless you want to do something or maybe you have a social media presence when you want. But it's not because you feel the need to feed the ego to be seen by everybody else. It's something that speaks to you, so I'll do it. But it's not to please people. And that's what this business has become for so many others. I need to constantly please. And when I'm not pleasing, I failed. And when you fail, you feel like, what have you accomplished? You could have accomplished—you could be an Oscar winner and it still wouldn't be enough. Because you're gonna fail at some point again. Like it's very rare that someone just rides high all the way through in this business. And so I think our business is such a tough one to navigate the waters you've been through. But thankfully you're putting those pieces in perspective now, which I think is perfect timing because your career is just gonna continue to go and go and go and go and go like that, because that's just what the business does. But you've got the tools now.
RS: It's brutal, to be honest. So it's good when we find spirituality and when we have all the things going for us that are so much more important, like parenthood. Because for me, I decided to be a mom late in life because it was all about career, career, I need to make it. And I wasn't searching fame. My problem with the business—and the lows were low. Not because, oh, I'm not where I wanna be because I wanna be famous. It was more about why do I have to constantly prove myself? I've done big movies, I've done huge TV shows and then why is there, what I call in the meantime, this moment of nothing that all the stuff that you have accomplished basically becomes nothing and you have to do it all over again. And it's the constant, I'm swimming against the current. It's not about being famous. It's about why, like it's been almost 30 years. Why do I still have to prove to you that I can do this when just look at my body of work? I've done it many times before. And it is very frustrating.
RG: Both of you guys have great points. I mean, and both of you guys' careers speak for themselves. I would say that I've been blessed now again with this new chance at life that I've come to understand it's more about connectivity. Connectivity to like minded individuals and loved ones and connectivity to a purpose, which for me is creativity. So to your point, I always felt that same way where I was like trying to outdo my last thing and that was so fleeting—or get some type of money, some type of recognition, and it was all fleeting because at the end of the day, after you pass away, that's all gone.
But if you create something, you connect with somebody, that remains even after you pass. So that's what truly matters. So I find myself having deep conversations with individuals. I find myself getting lost in my art or my poetry or writing screenplays and just kind of just creating, allowing my own storytelling to come in and flourish. But it can be very defeating in the time and age that we're in right now. So many people are trying to be social media stars and do the next TikTok dance and say the next absurd thing to get all the views.
And I think they're gonna find what I ended up finding a long time ago, which—one example sticks out in my mind. I'd always wanted to throw a first pitch in a baseball game or at least be a part of a baseball game, and I luckily got invited to the LA Dodgers game. And I remember getting that experience and the people that I wanted there weren't there. So it felt meaningless. And it felt like I had no true connection. I'm like, my mom, my dad, my brother, somebody should be here. Why are they not here? I've lost all contact because I've been so busy working. I've been so focused on creating this brand of Guzman. And now I understand. It's like, none of this means anything without the people that you care about right next to you.
EW: 100%. Talk to us about your movie. This is exciting. The Present.
RG: Yeah, The Present is an awesome film. It's a good wholesome family film. Nice little comedy in there. Cause you know, Isla Fisher, Greg Kinnear, they're incredible individuals. The kids kill it in this. I mean, they're the star pupils in this film. And then it was new for me. It was a little fun role to play. You know, comedic timing, trying to master that still. But I had fun with it playing opposite of Isla. And essentially the movie is about a family who's on their way to separation going on divorce and their kids get gifted this grandfather clock and this grandfather clock can turn back time. So the kids try and use this to try and save their family's relationship. And everything that ensues is really nice.
EW: You know, when I saw the premise, I was thinking to myself, cause I come from divorced parents and I remember as a kid always going like, how can I just change this? How can I take that back? And so to put that into a movie, I think is a fun concept that anybody coming from a divorced family could probably relate to in that sense. Cause you always want to turn back time and go, is there something I could have done? And even though, you know, kids take that blame, but it's a great premise. That sounds like a lot of fun.
And comedic timing, like doing comedy and stretching, even though you've done it before and you continue to do it, it's like, it's always its own art form. It is so tricky. People don't understand how difficult great comedy is. Like, I always think some of the best actors in our business, period, are comedians, because to make someone genuinely laugh, like crying laughter, to me is way harder than making someone feel like cry with tears of sadness. I think people can tap into that as a viewer much easier than like someone genuinely making you die laughing. So just doing comedy as an actor is such a fun art form to continue to explore, I'm sure.
RG: 100%. I mean, Robin Williams is the, I would say my go for that. He shows—”
EW: Do it all.
RG: The comedy that he does is so based in truth.
EW: Yeah.
RG: It's so grounded. That's why it works. And obviously it helps that he can play like 12 million personalities, but—
EW: Totally, but then he'll crush the drama at the same time. Like he'll do drama, no problem. Then to do comedy, you don't see a lot of dramatic actors come over and knock out comedy like you see comedians go over and knock out drama.
RG: Yeah.
EW: So I think like it's awesome that you got to explore that as well.
RS: Is there one thing that you see yourself in five years doing? You have a successful show, and now you're a dad, you know, you're pretty accomplished. But if you can look at your future and be like, there's this thing that is my north is the next, is what is gonna make everything make sense and be full circle.
RG: Yeah, being my own director. Right now I'm working on a film that I've written. I'm working with an incredible director, Mo McCray, mentoring under him and taking ownership of my own career and allowing myself to kind of open the space and open the door for not even just more Latinos, but just in general for newer voices and more creative voices and human experiences. But I mean, there's always that one big thing to be like a Marvel superhero at some point in time.
RS: You will.
EW: You can have more than one North for sure, but that's a great one. That's a great one.
RS: You know, it's interesting. I'm going through the process. I'm leaving to go to Puerto Rico to do this thing that I wrote that I'm gonna direct. It's my first feature that I'm directing, and it's like, I want it to be like the second stage of my career. And it's so hard, Ryan, to—it's an independent film and to be able to raise finance, you know, it's years, you know, like we had Ricky Martin a couple of podcasts back and he was saying that he learned that in this business, everything takes five years from beginning to end is five years. And now that I think about it, I'm like, you know what? Absolutely right. It's gonna be five years, you know, once I'm done, I edit, you know, locked picture, boom, it's gonna be five years.
And it's been brutal. The process, it's been brutal because it's a lot of letdowns and people offering you all kinds of things and at the end of the day, it's all BS, you know, it's all smoke and mirrors. And the only thing that keeps me going is the love of the art and the love of what we do because I wrote it and it's so special to me. It's like my third baby. And even though I'm going through logistical nightmares and finance, is it gonna fall apart? Is it here? Is it not? When I sit down to do my shot list and when I'm actually doing the creative work of it all, I can do that all day long. All day long, because it's amazing if you love it.
RG: Yeah. Yeah, the business part of it is just—it's defeating. The creativity part of it is incredible. And I'm sure this is just gonna be, you know, an abundance of opportunity and knowledge, you know, for the next thing. And like anything you do in life, as soon as you begin something new, you probably suck at it, unless you're one of those rare few individuals that can do everything. But there is a learning process, a learning curve. And this was gonna probably be one film that spurs on so many other films now.”
RS: Amen.
RG: Watch and enjoy.
RS: Yeah, amen. Anyways, thank you.
EW: Well, Ryan, thanks for hanging with us today. This was awesome, man. Thanks for sharing everything. Wish you the very best. Obviously you're crushing it and you have a lot of great aspirations still to come. So we truly wish you the best.
RS: Thank you.
RG: Alright, guys, you guys have a great day.
RS: You too, bye bye.
EW: That was great.
RS: Oh my God, he's so wonderful.
EW: Yeah, such an awesome guy. And truly wish him the best with the trajectory and everything he has planned for his career beyond 911. I love that he's writing and wants to direct. Check out The Present movie coming out tomorrow.
RS: Tomorrow. On demand.
EW: On demand. Till next time.
RS: Bye, love you.
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Some of my favourite Doctor Who fanfiction (mostly One Shots)
Drawing Nearer by Geat (Ninth Doctor/reader, Ninth Doctor & reader) on AO3
This author understands the beauty of Nine like no one else does. Like fuck. Wow. If you want something immersive and soft and beautiful this is the one. Actually, even if you don't, this is the one. You need it in your life believe me. And! If you're into the Tenth Doctor instead, or just want more of the amazing stuff after you finish the first one, there's a sequel to it, Like One of My French Girls?, which explores the same prompt (reader drawing a portrait of the Doctor) with a freshly regenerated Tenth Doctor. Which is really clever and witty so you should read it as well.
Immolation by songofdefiance (Donna Noble & Twelfth Doctor, feat. Bill Potts) on AO3
This one is what would happen if the writers were geniuses. It's a whole episode and holy shit it doesn't matter who your favorite characters are: it's for everyone. It's so smart I felt like an idiot reading it. (and yes the 1k words comment on there is me lmao don't judge me I was just very enthusiastic)
Children of the Time War series by illyriashade56 (Donna Noble & Tenth Doctor) on AO3
There's a reason I've read so many fics from this author. Had trouble picking a favorite, and still can't, but this one deserves whatever publicity I can give it. It's got it all. Holy crap. Hurt/Comfort, nice Donna whump, amazing descriptions, solid plot, and you know what's good? Once you're done reading this one, you can check her account and read another one cause they're all so good. I haven't read part three yet cause I'm keeping it for a perfect night (do y'all do this as well or is it just me? anyways lol, some fanfics are just so good that I need to shower, change my bed sheets, make a playlist and clean my room before reading them) (also the author is nice and I'm referring you to her account if you want to check more of her stuff: @illyriashade56)
Run (To A New Beginning) by Topaz_Eyes (Donna Noble/Tenth Doctor) on AO3
Just like the previous one, I had trouble picking just one from this author. The sex scenes dont seem to exist just out of horniness, they're really, really good, funny, witty and moving in a way I can't explain. The author has a way with words, it feels like you're in the story (so if you're horny for Donna Noble this is the one for you). And if you don't like explicit scenes, still check out the author, they've got some other amazing stuff! Like a bittersweet, sort of fix-it for Donna's ending (Journey's End).
The Awesome and Entirely True Tale of the Doctor's New Companion by TheBigCat (Donna Noble/Ninth Doctor) on AO3
Honestly this one slaps on all aspects and that's all I have to say. You need to read it. And when you have, you need to read it again.
Stress Fracture by Youth_of_Australia (Donna Noble & Twelfth Doctor) on AO3
I wasn't expecting to love this one so much when I clicked on it. The author specifically says they don't like Twelve and that's their bitter take on him. So you'd expect it to be Twelve slander, but actually, and I'm saying that as a big Twelve fan... it's surprisingly accurate. It's a mature, well-thought take, in the point of view of Donna, it bathes in the remains of TenDonna's friendship in bittersweet ways and it's beautiful and sad and nostalgic.
The Greeting-Card Aisle by twelvedimensional (Donna Noble & Ninth Doctor) on AO3
Pissed myself reading this one (all three times), cause it's so real. This author knows what they're doing. Take Nine and Donna, put them in a room together and that's certainly what's gonna happen. And believe me, the result is side-splitting.
Constructive Criticism by goldenrod (Donna Noble/Ninth Doctor) on AO3
A very sexy take on Donna and Nine as traveling companions. Nine only has eyes for Donna and her boobies (as he should). Oh, and it's sassy and hilarious.
Creature Fear by goodbye2pisces (Donna Noble/Tenth Doctor, Donna Noble & Tenth Doctor) on AO3
This one could very well be canon. I need it as an audio book. It's cute, funny, there's a bit of Donna/Ten whump, it can be read as platonic or romantic, and it has the most adorable little epilogue.
Think Outside the Box by TheAsexualofSpades (Tenth Doctor & kid!reader) on AO3
Basically if you love Ten but don't wanna fuck him, if you had a rough day and no one's around for a hug, if you grew up with emotionally distant parents, or if you simply need to have a good crybaby moment, this one's for you.
I'm On Fire by TheDarkMaterial (Donna Noble/River Song, Donna Noble & River Song) on AO3
Just like the last one, this one's kinda like a warm blanket. It's short, it's healing, it might make you cry nice little tears... also idc it's canon to me.
Appetites by EllyF (Donna Noble & Tenth Doctor) on whofic.com
This one is hard to read because it's very graphic on the Ten whump, but... it's fucking worth it. Trust. Me. Jfc. It's Hurt/Comfort so don't worry for yourself, but the angst is real, the gore is terrific, there are some horrible comparisons in there that will absolutely draw some tears, and the frustration will be real, but when you're done with it, you'll be like Wow. Wtf did I just read.
Only Human by Louiecat68 (Donna Noble/Tenth Doctor) on whofic.com
If you're looking for Donna whump, search no more: this is the place. This one's pretty graphic, pretty horrible, Donna's going through it in all possible ways and you'll want to wrap her in a blanket, feed her burgers and hot chocolate and burn the world down around her. Quite literally.
The Doctor is In by crystanagahori (Martha Jones & Tenth Doctor, Martha Jones & Donna Noble, Donna Noble/Tenth Doctor) on AO3
This one's funny and so sweet and you have no trouble reading it in the characters' voices cause it's faithful to all three of them. I don't read Martha fics usually, I only clicked cause I saw TenDonna, but even if you're like me, you'll have no problem reading it even when it focuses on Martha's life, believe me. The vibe's just immaculate.
Your Eyes Aren't Rivers by ClementineCrane & Multifandomfuckfest (Donna Noble/Tenth Doctor) on AO3
Another one where the vibe's immaculate! Basically one of the things that made me want to write a Doctor Who High School AU of my own. Ten and Donna are absolutely adorable in this.
I'm tagging some people who'd probably be interested in one/some of those:
@bobcatblahs
@madhatter0309
@doctordonnasstuff
@brisingr-sword
@peggysbundy
@doctor-donnaa
@daze-stole-ur-milk
@obsessedanddepressed
@doctordonna-protection-squad
@jellojellyroll
@basmathgirl
@illyriashade56
@ichangemyusertoomuch
@tatennant
@paradox-n-bedrock
@cdyssey
@love-in-the-time
@davidtennan-t
@rushinintolove
@whatsfourteenupto
@nat-20s
@thegingergoddess
@odakota-rose
If some of you read/have read one or several of those and wanna interact feel free to dm me :)
#doctor who fanfiction#and this doesn't include the crossover fics btw#ninth doctor#tenth doctor#donna noble#doctordonna#tendonna#ninedonna#twelvedonna#dw#twelfth doctor#9th doctor#10th doctor#12th doctor#they're all so well written#you'll have the time of your life with any of those#trust me
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Random things I would have loved for Voltron
-Keith never leaves w/ the BOM and stays the leader of Voltron (I have no problem with him being a blade, I actually enjoyed watching it, but I just didn't like him choosing them over Voltron)
-also! I wished we actually saw the "Galra Keith reveal" w/ the team. Such a missed opportunity.
-More of Lance being Keith's second in command. I feel like we didn't get a lot of that.
-Shiro stays dead. Look I love the man. One of my favorite characters. But after S2 it always feels like he just doesn't quite fit into the story like he used to.
-Very biased. But. Klance romance. Not the "will they won't they" shit. No. A actual relationship development. If it was written well I could see it happening maybe in s4/s5?
-Lotor and Keith friendship! Bonding over being mixed race and not fitting in.
-Keith learning Galra culture! Maybe through Lotor? Or BOM?
-Lotura. Pls. They were so cute.
-Oh, should have said this before the other three, but a Lotor redemption arc.
-A Keith and Lance ep. Because in eight seasons they never had an episode centered around them like they did for other characters. Klance had moments. But not eps.
-A Pidge arc !! She had a motivation (save her family) but not really an arc. The same could be said for Hunk.
-follow through with Lance's character development. Writers...you already set him up for it, you just had to follow through with it and actually do something with it.
-more found family fluff throughout the seasons. Because I felt like they never actually got to the level of "found family" if that makes sense
-change the armor color to match the lions. Mostly because I feel Keith wearing Shiro's armor for the first time when he takes over would also have an emotional impact.
- Coran being fleshed out. I know he's a comic relief. But I really love Coran! And I'd love to know more about him.
- I wish the team all had their own little quirks or interests, just something that didn't really have big significance to the story but made them feel more real, you know.
-okay, but It would have been amazing if team Voltron came to a planet that had no idea there was life outside their planet. Just like earth. Idk I feel like it would be funny XD
Anyway, that's my food for thought, feel free to add to this post :)
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I DIDN'T NOTICE YOU RB'D THE DEATH NOTE ASK MEME uhhh. 23 and 24 maybe?
ooooh thanks!!!
23. what was your favorite moment and why?
"oooh that's a very hard question" ...is what I might've said, if this wasn't the light yagami animanga series and light yagami makes me insane. uhhh. I do have several though, if that's allowed.
(update: when I said "several" I meant uh. a lot apparently. whoops)
favourite line / favourite moment in a "holy wow this is amazing thematically": the. y'know. "Tell me, Light, from the moment you were born, have you ever told the truth?" line in the anime rain scene. yeah. holy fuck that is amazing because I LOVE that sort of thing. as far as character traits go, there's like nothing I love more than characters that are liars who lie lyingly (multiple types of this apply). it's truly, truly the best.
favourite moments based on what I repeatedly rewatched immediately following my first watch of the anime: there are, uh. three (in no particular order)
light goes home from the entrance ceremony, incredibly stone-faced (like 😐) the entire way -> gets home, gets up the stairs, opens the door, shuts the door, sits down on his chair, suddenly starts shaking -> blows up "Dammit! He got me! Damn L! I have never been so humiliated in my life!" (even Ryuk comments internally that he's never seen him lose his composure so much) -> suddenly laughs and calms down talking about how it's a battle of wits now and he'll make L trust him and kill him, with his own hands if necessary. i rewatched this several times in a row which was definitely very normal of me.
look at him. grumpy but in like an extremely restrained way (his face is even hidden). until it breaks completely in the next page lol
the last episode. light trying so hard not to laugh/smirk in the warehouse, then he reveals himself as kira (a lot of laughing), and he loses and falls pathetically, shouting for kiyomi and mikami and misa after matsuda shoots him, and then runs in the beautiful sunset, passing his younger high school self by, and seeing a vision of L before he dies on the stairs. all this is great and i did an immediate rewatch of this episode after finishing it
the Relight scene where Light laughs on top of L's grave soil. it's conceptually fucked up in an amazing way that really really appeals to me. murder and grave desecration are really romantic/beautiful/erotic on principle.
as you can see I am very normal. as you can see I am a very normal Light Yagami fan. one of those two statements may be unironically true, but the two statements inherently cannot go together. anyway this particular selection of scenes totally doesn't actually say anything about me right but anyway I'm right those are totally the best please torture light some more everyone
favourite moments I didn't immediately repeatedly rewatch/reread like that but are still my absolute top favourites:
The entire first episode because DAMN did it hook me completely very, very fast. I did NOT know there was going to be Faustian contract + god complex&general big ego + everything else in one in this little and very infamous character known as "Light Yagami". my expectations were blown instantly and I got obsessed with DN right away
L and Light declaring war on each other over the live broadcast and L asking and taunting Light/Kira to kill him. amazing. it was really... gay. sorry I can't think of a better word lmfao
L's death scene oh my god. GOD I loved (and was really really amazed/impressed by by) Light rushing to him at once and basically lying on top of him for a second, so that he will die in his arms. GOD. it is SO. like yeah this is literally my favourite sort of thing holy shit it is amazing (it's to gloat to him and to declare victory before his death, and it's to pretend to the Task Force too, and yet it seemed like such an instinctual reaction really that I think his first instinct really IS to hold him in his arms before he dies. this is really good). and the dramatic performance afterwards. I love it
on a COMPLETELY different note. JESUS CHRIST I love Soichiro's death scene actually. because holy fuck the multi-layered irony. I really love it. actually I think I wrote about that scene long before I even really wrote anything else about DN. alright here:
idk if I still 100% agree with my initial impression but it should still overall hold and MAN. I definitely loved it (<- fan of irony) (<- extremely, extremely normal Light Yagami fan) (<- fan of Soichiro also, to a lesser extent)
favourite moment that gave me a lot of thoughts when I'm reading the manga: (even though I already first watched the anime and this stuff is also in the anime)
the moment where Rem is like "okay I will kill L" and Light, person who has been plotting this exact murder for ages, is like. Oh shit. he'll die...? which is. man. Light sure is Light
like look at his face here!
favourite manga-exclusive moments:
Light not considering killing Sayu. Light asking Soichiro to promise him to come back alive with Sayu. that scene afterwards where Soichiro is at home thinking he should die. (at least I think those weren't in the anime?)
the manga ending is also good
I like that the manga tells us he lost weight and has nightmares due to using the death note. (it possibly has happened to anime light too but we don't get to see it)
not a "favorite moment" exactly, but while the scene is beautiful I don't like Misa dying in the end despite how much I adore everything else in that episode, so I like that Misa doesn't canonically die like that in the manga
favourite anime-exclusive moments:
rain scene and footwashing scene yes obviously
everything about Light being "haunted" after L's death. aside from the aforementioned Light dying scene, I really like the anime
I love the anime ending too
also hmm this might be a less popular opinion, but personally I also love some of anime Light's characterization tidbits that differs from the manga (e.g. first episode). I would say it's because it's maybe very slightly more relatable for me but that probably sounds wack lmao so
favourite moments based on how comedic I find them: (not including ones I already included in other sections) DN is such an amazing comedy I'm not even kidding
the whole handcuffs thing oh my god. homophobic misa moment. I didn't think she'd actually call him gay, but there it was. also just fken. buddy. L??????? why and how and in what world was there an absolute need for this totally normal, totally appropriate, absolutely most safe and most ideal method of interrogating criminals. I was laughing because god. that's not even. yeah okay I'm happy with it but LMFAO YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS. and Light just easily went along with it
the... the... first date scene. I was like oh my god c'MON you two. I didn't think something like this would be so like this in the actual canon manga. first date where Misa is being thirdwheeled while Light and L sit together chained together and then they focus all energy on talking to each other and then they get into a fist fight (date activity) all over the room. combined with the later dunking on matsuda. this is LITERALLY how a fucking sitcom goes at this point.
the anime's footwashing also. not the scene itself necessarily but just the fact that it fucking exists between lawlight and is. Like THAT????? lmfao like what the hell
ALSO the. fken. Matsuda fake death scene lmfao it was so wack in retrospect
live Ryuk reactions + "hey Light can we play Mario Golf? can we play Mario Golf Light? come on let's play a match of Mario Golf"
man I can't even include all of it here because Light Yagami is so entertaining to me in 85%+ of all the scenes she appears in in one way or another like his existence itself is peak entertainment to me. it's entertaining when Light is humiliated and it's entertaining when he's succeeding. and like I mean, he's the protagonist of the whole manga / show, and I mean I can't list every moment in the series can I. lmao
favourite moments that don't have light yagami in it: I'm sorry everyone else but I am especially obsessed with light. as you can see. however I love many other characters too
Kiyomisa dinner kiyomisa fighting !!!
(technically this includes light but) matsuda shooting light
misa being unexpectedly smart (compared to her wider reputation) (the higuchi car scene! and others) is also nice
idk if it makes sense but. the scene where Rem and Misa mention the way a Shinigami can die, and Misa admits to thinking about killing Rem like it's. just very Neat. I like the vibes here and Misa is very beautiful (related to the dialogue about love and killing. yeah)
also!! I love the meronia moments
and then I recently got myself into soichello so actually yeah. the soichiro mello scenes too. very good
24. any headcanons you want to share?
uhhhhhhhhhhh hmmm. man what's a headcanon I haven't properly shared on tumblr before, and also isn't like a take that is shared and often discussed by tons of people around here already?
... fine okay let's do this finally.
neurodivergence + mental illnesses headcanons
[disclaimer: please read this post first. if you disagree, you can skip over this and skip to the next section!]
aside from OCD and autism, imo Light has NPD with some ASPD traits, and also bipolar. this is because the way his mental illnesses are is like. I feel represented lol. (not as in I have every one of those things I listed, but I probably have some/most of them, and the combinations are interesting). even though this is unfortunately Light Yagami. but I really like him for that too tbh because man. I don't get to see that stuff often. (like idk how to explain it. even though I'd never even remotely pull that kinda stuff because of differences in personalities, values, background, abilities, and manifestation and degree of symptoms, etc. however some of his mannerisms sometimes feel right on point e.g. I feel like the way he is like sometimes gives me depression + hypomanic/manic vibes, in a way where I can see myself in him if it makes sense lmao)
on that note Misa 100% very BPD I agree. I wanna say on top of autism, L also seems to have some ASPD traits imo. Near is autistic but I think that goes without saying lol. Mello has like... C-PTSD and/or NPD. and then this probably not a very unexpected take, but Matsuda has ADHD or audhd vibes. OH and! Soichiro also very much has OCD and autism, imo.
other headcanons:
not a hot take, but Mello and Near are both nonbinary and/or genderqueer (and/or otherwise trans, if not applicable) to me (could be transmasc or transfem, not necessarily transneutral; I could see either or any direction among those, although I would say I lean toward seeing Near as transfem and/or nonbinary, and Mello as transmasc and/or genderqueer).
Light is demi, and has had a covert superiority complex about not feeling attraction unlike his peers (like. you can view him deciding to use porn mag reading to prove himself as a normal teenage boy as indicative of his subconscious? mental association of his more "normal" peers as, like.... unfortunate horny perverts. in a way. if that makes sense) I know how it feels because I was kinda like this in grade 6-8
man I definitely have other ideas too but I'm drawing a blank at the moment partly because it's late and I still haven't eaten lunch lmao. I will continue to post my thoughts and headcanons in the future, so tune in by clicking on the subscribe butto- *gets shot*
ask game
#thanks for the ask!!!#death note#light yagami#lawlight#misa amane#l lawliet#soichiro yagami#ryuk#rem#touta matsuda#asks#i (ai)#ask games#.....you may notice that I did not really answer question 23. as I provided like 23 favourite moments instead of one. whoops
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Hello! I've been reading through your blog for the past few days and everything you write is so amazing. I was wondering if maybe you would consider writing something about an aro high schooler who gets asked out by this person they've convinced themselves that they like, but when they're actually asked about it, it just feels wrong? (Bonus points if they think kissing is gross because imo it is) - sincerely, an aroace teen writer who is very inspired by you
"River kissed you!?" Their best friend shrieked, with all of the excitement that the protagonist had expected to feel.
They managed a weak smile. Their stomach squirmed.
It was supposed to be great, wasn't it? A first kiss. People wrote novels about them. It was the epic climax of the episode. It was fireworks and a fluttering stomach, it was the whole world narrowing down to a single moment, it was heart pounding love.
It was gross.
"...was it bad?" their friend asked, catching their expression. Their face fell. A smashed plate of disappointment.
The protagonist swallowed. "It was...wet."
"I mean, it takes a bit of practice to get good at it. Even with the right person. Did they stick their tongue down your throat?"
"No. I don't think so? I mean - it was fine." It would be fine. It would definitely be fine. Maybe their first kiss hadn't exactly been what they were hoping for, but it would get better. Wouldn't it? Their throat suddenly felt horribly tight. They pressed their lips together to keep their voice from wobbling and took a breath. "You're probably right. I mean, I don't know if they've ever kissed anyone before either. Maybe I was really bad at it."
"No!"
"It's okay." At least, if they were bad at kissing, that was something they could improve upon. At least it wouldn't always feel so...
It wasn't like it was all some elaborate ruse the whole population was in on, anyway. That would be ridiculous!
It had been a nice night otherwise. The movie had been good, and their hands had touched over the popcorn, and they'd got into a great discussion about the plot after.
It would get better.
...it did not get better, though.
They started to find excuses not to kiss River; "Let's take it slow."
A kiss on the head or the cheek wasn't so bad, or like a one second peck on the mouth. It was all the other kisses.
When it didn't feel wrong, they felt nothing. They counted the awkward seconds for it to be over, then vowed to do much better next time when they caught a glimpse of the confused sort of hurt in River's eyes.
"I know you're shy," River said, one day, in a trying-to-be-casual voice. "But you like...never kiss me. It's always me kissing you. Did I..." Their voice dropped, agonised, "am I really bad at it or something?"
"No, no!"
"Oh, good."
"I just - I don't now." Their stomach squeezed. "I'm not sure I really like kissing," they confessed. "It's - I don't know." It felt rude to say ew.
"Oh," River said, in a tone of less good, but trying to be chill and non-judgy. "Okay."
"Sorry."
"It's okay." River took their hand, squeezed. "Kissing isn't everything, I guess. There are other things."
For a second, just a second, they were sure they'd never loved anyone more.
They liked River. Didn't they? They certainly thought they had. They had those cheekbones, and those pretty eyes, and they were always nice to everyone. They made the protagonist laugh, at least when there wasn't kissing involved.
It should have all been perfect.
They'd always wanted to fall in love.
In the end, they broke up after about three months.
The protagonist didn't ask what they'd done wrong, because it felt obvious, even if River wasn't cruel enough to say it. Maybe they should have ended it themselves, instead of forcing River to do it. Probably.
But what could they possibly say? It's not you, it's me. Nobody would believe that even if it was true. Oh, I know I said yes to dating you, but I'm just not that into you. That felt far too mean. It wasn't like River had done anything bad.
Their best friend held them while they cried, wracking things that choked up in their chest.
"What if I die alone?"
"Don't be stupid." Their best friend hugged them hard. "Of course you're not going to lie alone. River wasn't that great anyway! There's clearly something wrong with you if they don't want you."
The protagonist didn't quite dare say that wasn't exactly how it happened.
They kissed a few other people over the years, normally around the time when everyone else did. New Year, at the strike of twelve. If there wasn't any fireworks in the kiss, at least they were popping and fizzing outside and a new year was a new slate. They tried once after a few too many cocktails, with a friend, because maybe it would feel a little better when they were tipsy. With someone who definitely knew what they were doing.
It wasn't, though.
"You'll find the right person," their best friend said. "It's different when it's the right person, you know? Like me and Willow. I didn't think, but then..." They were happily in love; exuberant on it, nonstop on it.
The protagonist didn't want to resent it. They didn't want to be that person, spitting bitter like the villain in a fairytale.
"Romance novels are very exaggerated," their best friend said. "It's not always butterflies. It doesn't have to be butterflies to be real, you know? It's just someone you really want to spend time with."
But, the more the protagonist thought about it, the more they weren't sure that was quite true. There were plenty of people that they liked being around. It still didn't make them want to kiss them.
They weren't even sure they wanted to fall in love anymore. It wasn't like they spent most of their life miserable or anything. It was just...sometimes, when everyone else in the room had someone, or their parents asked them yet again if there was anyone they'd been seeing. Even in the height of drama, it all seemed so much easier for them.
They were twenty when they first came across the words.
Aromantic Asexual.
It was the second time they'd cried over the whole kissing thing.
That time it was relief.
"Oh my god," they left their best friend a message, vindicated. "It is an elaborate ruse!!! I'm going to bite something!!"
It got better, after that.
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