#anyway off to sleep now

[wishfulsketching]

Both @dangerkrill and @teawithghosts mentioned this meme thanks to the leash art so I just had to do it!!!!

[heartorbit]

figure skating set right now please. thanks

[moonlightcycle571]

Wouldn’t it be funny if Billy could only give powers to one person at a time, so the Vasquez kids take turns being Captain Marvel Junior (as they still look like kids) and they make everyone thinks it’s one shape shifting child.

Reporter: Captain Marvel, who is this new protoge worth you?

Marvel: you’ve met Junior though?

Mary, who wanted to take over: yeah we talked last week.

Reporter: ah what

At first it’s just Mary and Freddy (mostly Freddy cause he’s really into being a superhero) so everyone thinks Captain Marvel Junior is a shape shifting gender fluid kid and Marvel is a supportive dad.

But then the other Vasquez’s join in the fun

Reporter: Captain, new protoge?

Eugene, in it for shots and giggles: Claire, it’s me, Junior

Reporter: … you’re Asian now?

Eugene: woooooowww

Marvel: that’s low even for you

Reportee: but I-

Eugene: Both Captain and I have lived lives of many genders, colours and have been in many cultures. And yet you shame me for feeling nostalgic and reverting to an ancient form of mine.

Reporter: I- w h a t

It’s sparks a lot of debate of cultural appropriation for shapeshifters in general, with a lot of people invoking Martian Manhunter, fae and other shapeshifters. So naturally Pedro steps up

Captain Marvel and Junior both volunteering at a homeless shelter.

Reporter: ��� junior?

Pedro: yes?

Reporter: what are you doing

Pedro, making an ancient Mexican recipe he got from the Library in the Rock: making a dish I learned a couple of centuries ago from my then family.

Reporter, really doesn’t want to get cancelled: ok

Naturally this takes a lot of coordination, and a lot of people test them by giving info to one kid, and different info to the other. Solomon sees right through them cause the divine group chat is connected to Billy and the chosen Junior. Things were starting to chill for a bit. Then Darla joined in.

Darla, visibly younger than the other forms: Hi :D

Reporter: why do you keep getting younger and younger???

Darla: :3

At this point the reporter is so done. Are you a child with a lightning emblem on you? You are Captain Marvel Junior. And it seems to work most of the time.

Billy: *gets deaged as Cap*

Reporter: oh junior! New form? This one looks closer to Cap!

Billy: I’m not Junior???

Reporter: *bluescreens*

Bonus:

In a Justice League Meeting

Flash: So is Junior like a mantle? If so why is it only one kid at a time?

Hal: yeah, what do the others do when you take one at a time?

Billy, an absolute troll at heart: what do you mean, it’s the one kid?

Superman: what???

Billy: yeah so Junior hasn’t settled into which form they like the best and switch it up. I think they like it better that way.

Martian Manhunter, troll n2: *nods along* finding ones main form is an important part of self discovery. On Mars, many like to alternate between forms as they could not be tied down to one.

JL: ah

Bonus 2:

Batman: *slowly puts away the ‘Not An Adoption Problem’ Support Group invite*

Bonus 3:

Dudley: please please please please

Billy, fed up: WHY

Dudley: it’ll be so funny.

Billy: you know what, fine!

Later Dudley is given some powers but decides to only let the Reporter see him.

Reporter: … Junior????

Dudley: no one will ever believe you *flies off*

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

finally at that age where i'm thinking i should get a tattoo. not bc i feel strongly about it, just seems like a waste not to. i've got so much skin i'm not using

[jaztice]

ttrpgs are poetry. to Me

To See With Eyes Unclouded By Hate | The Fall of Home | Uncanny | Shadow / Giant | Misspent Youth | Thorn | Eyes on the Prize | Cracker Barrel Has Fallen

[xxcrumbxx]

Hello hello soo um im still workin on it ,ive been kinda burnt out from it an ik thers no real preshure and im wayyy past valintinse day but heres a wip of those silly lil valintines cards

Also today is my birth day im 22 now so .. Thats a thing. Anyway im planing on making like 3 alternet vershions of eclips 1 with the cannon tipical 2 arm pre decomishion desighn 1 with the 4 armed fannon /cannon design and 1 with the 4 armed ballone world desighn. Probly ganna take a bit but what ever it will be valintine in fuckin may who cares lol

[salmonlyster]

someone make up a good ship name for these two while i go crazy

[casualavocados]

You've never done that when I got close to you before. Why? None of your business. Tell me, or you can't leave.

KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 10

[centaur-dreaming]

Aftg Hunger Games au with Jean as Katniss because in the end Elodie dies anyway

[varpusvaras]

More Soulmate Marks AU stuff (a thing I will be writing later on because this is possessing me) is that Padmé and Anakin have matching marks. Palpatine sees these and fully believes that Anakin and Padmé are soulmates, especially since by the time Palpatine meets Anakin for the first time, Anakin and Padmé have already met each other, and with how taken Anakin is with Padmé, it's a safe assumption to be made.

What he doesn't know is (and what Baby Anakin doesn't mention because he at first didn't quite get the Marks either) is that while Padmé and Anakin have the same mark, they didn't fullfill each other's marks.

No, Anakin and Padmé are not soulmates.

Anakin and Rex, however, are.

As are Rex and Padmé.

When Padmé gets pregnant with the twins, it is Rex who takes her to her prenatal appointments, because if it comes down to it, they can just claim that Rex is the father. It would still cause a scandal, of course, but not as big as if people knew that the twins were Anakin's. Anakin rather likes this arrangement, because it keeps everybody off his back as well. They all know that Padmé is having an extremely healthy pregnancy, and they since finding out that it's twins, they have really put an effort into making sure that everything goes well, as Padmé is accessing all of the top-tier health care.

The thing is, that Anakin is still really, really obsessive.

He has it all planned out. He will carry out his destiny, he will end the war, he will get Rex and his brothers their freedom, and he, Padmé, Rex and the kids will live a happy life together.

He gets the dreams of Padmé dying in childbirth. They go to the doctors. The doctors run every single test and tell them that everything is absolutely as it should be, and with them all there for the birth, the chances of something happening are minimal. They will take every precaution, so if something goes wrong, they have every tool available to prevent things from escalating.

Anakin thinks that maybe the stress of the war is getting to him. But the dreams just keep coming, and they are so similar to the dreams of his mother, and he just cannot let them be.

The doctors continue to tell that everything is alright, and that they will do absolutely everything to stop anything from going wrong.

Anakin still cannot let it be. He analyses every part of his dreams, trying to see what could be the cause, trying to see the thing that connects all the dreams together-

Rex is not there.

He's never there, not in single one of the dreams. And Padmé looks so heartbroken, and she keeps asking after someone and-

Rex is dead.

There is not other option. In his dreams, Rex is dead, and Padmé keeps asking after him. She has lost her soulmate, and is heartbroken, and cannot keep going-

No, no, no. Anakin can't let that happen. He cannot lose Padmé, and he cannot lose Rex, and he cannot let Padmé lose Rex either.

If Rex is alive, then his dreams cannot come true. If Rex is there, then they cannot be real.

So Anakin becomes extremely protective of Rex, and every single battle is even more stress to him, because at least Padmé is safe on Coruscant, but Rex is not, Rex is always there, and Anakin needs to keep him safe, because if he doesn't, he will lose them both.

And he just keeps spiraling deeper and deeper, because he needs them, because losing one of them means losing the other as well, and he can't take it, he can't-

Then Palpatine offers him his help.

Anakin is so ready to listen. Palpatine is the Chancellor. He could do something, he could make it so Rex doesn't have to fight, he could make it so Anakin can have them both-

Palpatine tells him that he can help, if Anakin just helps him. And Anakin listens, listens to Palpatine tell him everything, listens to the solution he could have, and Palpatine just keeps telling how he can keep Padmé from dying.

But that's not enough.

If Rex doesn't die, if Rex is there, then Padmé won't die, either.

Palpatine keeps talking and talking and talking, and then tells Anakin of how the clones will help them destroy the Jedi, how they will be their army that brings the Empire to its fruition, and Anakin-

all Anakin hears is that Rex will have to keep fighting, that he won't have Rex, that Rex is forced to keep fighting, forced to be in more danger-

And right then and there, Anakin looks at Palpatine, and sees the enemy.

[toxiccaves]

these are some ugly looking fish

[dsnzfb]

Coming On Quickly (R18+)

Cactus/Rose (m/m), cold snz. Just under 5.5k warnings: sex, contagion talk, uncovered snz, cactus is doomed In which Cactus has to deal with some strange new feelings when Rose catches a particularly intense cold.

He felt fine. That’s what Rose told himself when shivering on the way to work. He picked up a cup of tea from his usual coffee shop, though a certain someone wasn’t working that morning. The cold air and steam from the tea was what was making his nose run, not anything else.

The morning was going well, even if he sneezed out of nowhere and dropped his keys as he was trying to unlock the door. Didn’t mean anything.

Another couple of sneezes when he was finally warming up and going through his morning checklist, and Rose finally considered the fact that he might’ve caught a tiny cold.

Just a small one. Not anywhere near bad enough to go home, it was just a sniffle. Besides, he had his tea, the shop was warm (for the flowers’ sake), and he was surrounded by handkerchiefs if he needed them.

His nose was running properly now, soft sniffles no longer enough to keep it at bay, which was definitely chalked up to the change in temperature.

It was a few days post-christmas. He wouldn’t even usually be open this time of year, but it was surprisingly lucrative, especially when his competitors were shut. You never know when someone needs some flowers! A last minute gift, or one ordered weeks in advance to be picked up on a day like today…

Rose sniffled again and rummaged for one of his own handkerchiefs. Didn’t wanna dip into his stock just yet, his nose was only a little drippy. And itchy-

“HheiH-KKSHh! Oh, goodness…”

He didn’t have to hold them back, he realised, but it’s difficult when it’s all you’ve known- ohgod, the itch was back-

“Hhi-KKSHhew! …Ow…”

Okay, that stung his throat. He snuffled into the handkerchief he finally found and flipped the switch on his kettle. He was going to need more tea to get through today, and the one he just bought was getting dangerously low.

His first customer of the day came in about half an hour later, wanting to browse and ask Rose his expert opinion on what flowers to get his mother-in-law to get on her good side for the upcoming year. When trying to offer up assistance, Rose’s nose of course decided that was the moment to start running like a freight train.

“snf! Goodness- please excuse me a moment…” He turned away to blow his nose, though he knew this wouldn’t be the end of it, “All this cold weather, you see…”

“There’s a lot of it going around this time of year.” The customer replied with a sympathetic smile, though Rose noticed them taking a subtle step back. He didn’t blame the guy. From all the dripping and blowing and sneezing he’d done, his nose was probably a cherry red.

“I sound worse than I feel.” He replied, unsure if he really believed himself. His muscles were starting to ache, “Sorry about that. Anyway, you were talking about her favourite colours? We can use it either as a base or as an accent colour.”

“I know she likes pink, but I think it’s the, uh, the really bright one that’s basically red.”

“Magenta?”

The guy looked confused. Perplexed, even.

Rose got out from behind the counter and took him to a bunch of brightly coloured carnations.

“This colour, dear.”

“Oh- yeah, that’s it! The bright pink!”

“It’s quite the bold colour, so I’d recommehhhnd… E-excuse- hhat’sSHHKk!! KkshHHEew!”

Rose realised as he sneezed into his elbow that he’d left the handkerchief at the counter, and that the double was very productive.

“Bless you!”

“My god- sorry- a moment please-” he mumbled into the crook of his elbow, hurrying back to the safety of his handkerchief. He felt mortified as he cleaned himself up.

“I’m so sorry about that, how unsightly, they snuck up on me…” He blew his nose with a slight honk, wincing at how productive even that was.

“Uh, it’s okay? Sorry to make you work when you’re feeling so bad.”

Well, at least this guy wasn’t an asshole. More customers should be like him.

“It’s not that bad, it’s just… Noisy. And annoying. What I was trying to say was that it’s a very bold colour, so it would be best as an accent against a more baby-pink or white bouquet.”

The guy nodded at him, looking now only a little confused. He seemed to get the idea.

“I’ll show you what I mean, if you like. Here- let me just…” Rose got out from behind the counter again, this time bringing his handkerchief with him. He picked out some white flowers – delicate things, big fluffy ones, some light pink roses, and placed them in his demonstrative vase, adjusting them so they were just so.

“So this would be the base…” He said, then going to grab a few more bright flowers, some lilies, carnations, and chrysanthemums.

“And these would be- b…be… Please hold-” he handed the flowers to the customer hurriedly, at least able to prepare his handkerchief properly this time.

“HhpSSHhh!! HhiITSHhew-aahSHOo! Goodness… Excuse me.”

“Bless you, sounds like it’s hitting you hard.”

“It wasn’t this bad earlier, I swear- hhaPSSHHh!!”

Rose sniffled pathetically, muffling a cough into his kerchief. “Sorry, I wouldn’t want you to catch this. Would you just- just put those in the vase?”

The guy followed Rose’s instructions, then the Brit adjusted the positioning of the brightly-coloured flowers so they didn’t overpower the rest of the bouquet.

“Like that. Is that sort of what you were looking for?”

“I don’t really know what I’m looking at, but, uh, yeah? It looks like a real bouquet, way better than what you pick up from the superstore.”

Rose nodded, hiding his streaming nose behind the now thoroughly-used white cloth. “Those bloody places… You know they use dye in the water to make their flowers different colours? Poor things, it’s not that hard to breed other strains… Anyway, thank you for the compliment! It’s words like that that make it all worth it.”

Giddy from the kind words about his work, Rose happily took payment for the bouquet, finished it up, and wrapped it in acetate and coloured tissue paper.

“I hope your m-muhh- hhGTShh! GgsHHh! -snf!- Mother-in-law likes it!”

“Thanks a ton, feel better!”

Rose deflated when he heard the bell on the door signify the customer was gone. How exhausting - and he wasn’t even a troublemaker!

He decided to rummage in his drawers to see if they had any medicine, brows furrowing as each one came up empty.

“Well, shite.” He cursed, blowing his ever-running nose again. He took a handkerchief from the piles in the store and made a note to write it off - it was at this moment he regretted making them scented. He wasn’t allergic to perfume or scents, but his nose was so sensitive from this accursed cold that-

“HhaPSSHHh!! PPSHhew-aashHiiee-iiISHHhoo! Hhat-TSSshh-SSHh-SSHHew! Oh my god!”

His eyes were watering now, and he dabbed at them with a dry corner of the cloth. Is this how Cactus felt when he gave him his number?

Speaking of Cactus, maybe he could swing by some medicine, maybe a box or two of tissues… Rose was fairly certain that if he kept using his handkerchief, his nose would violently protest all day long.

‘Morning sweetie 🥰🌹’ he sent the text. Cac had not long taught him how to use emojis, and he had great fun choosing the right ones for the occasion.

A few minutes later, he got a reply:

‘mornin, what’s up?’

‘I don’t always text when I want something from you, do I? 🗣️’

‘not always, you just sayin hi? heheh hi there cutie’

‘Well… Maybe a little more than just saying ‘hello’. Could you pop over with some paracetamol and tissues, dear? It’s not a big deal, I just can’t leave the shop unattended.’

‘ur sick?’

‘Just a sniffle.’

‘yeah, sure it is. gimme 20.’

‘Love you, dearest. 💓’

“There we are. I hope he doesn’t worry himself silly.” Rose spoke aloud to himself, noting the stuffy and almost gravelly nature of his voice. Gods, he really did sound worse than he felt. He sniffed experimentally and found that instead of dripping, one nostril was now utterly blocked.

His nose felt hot and itchy and- wait, like something was moving? Oh- he squished his nostrils up against the new handkerchief to find that it was starting to run, even while supposedly blocked. How kind.

Ugh, and the proximity to the perfumed cloth-

“hhaPTSH!! AahYISHH! Ha… Hhhuua-AIITSHHhew! My giddy aunt, I can’t stop sneezing… Maybe toilet paper will just have to do for now… This blasted scent is too much…”

Rose sipped at his tea, but even the warmth from that couldn’t stop a shiver washing over him, then another stuffy attempt at a sniffle. A mistake, perhaps, as it stoked the embers of a tickle in his nose into flames, and he ducked into a wad of toilet roll, scratchy against his red nostrils.

“iiHhaPTSHHew! AAESHOO!! …Guh… Unsightly…”

Another shiver to make him cross his arms, and he pulled up a chair at the counter. He wasn’t usually one to use it, since he always had something or other to be getting on with, but… His arms hurt, his chest ached from sneezing, and he couldn’t seem to get warm. Was the central heating on the blink, or something?

…He couldn’t be bothered to go check. He’d need all his energy for if a customer came in, to put on a smile and save face. For now, though, with soft jazz playing as his store's ambient music, he found himself zoning out. Then his eyes started to flutter closed. He had things he should be doing, really, but… He just ached so much, and he was cold. Moving would lose him the warmth he tried so hard to gain.

The bell chimed, signifying an entrant, and Rose jumped, quickly wiped his nose, and opened his mouth to greet them.

“Hey, ain’t you a sight for sore eyes?” came a low voice, warm like spiced honey.

Oh, he could cry. What an angel. What a darling. Here to save the day.

“Cac…”

“So… Just a sniffle, huh? Sure looks like it.” The blond approached with an eye roll, then side eyeing the flowers surrounding them, “You’re lookin’ pretty under the weather. Glad I trusted my gut.”

“What do you-” Rose was interrupted by a bag being set down on the counter in front of him.

“Stopped by a pharmacy, thought you might need some more actual supplies. Go on, you can look.”

Rose took things out one at a time: cold medicine, thank goodness, a decongestant spray, cough drops, several boxes of tissues…

“Aloe vera? You’re a saint.”

Cac laughed at that, “I just know what you’re like. Keep lookin’.”

Wait, why was the bag warm?

He pulled out a watertight container with a thick liquid in it, and blinked at his boyfriend.

“You got me soup?”

“The, uh… It’s… There’s a place right by the pharmacy, so it wasn’t outta my way or nothin’, and it smelled pretty good, so… Got you their soup of the day… Figured you probably hadn’t eaten. It’s minestrone.”

“It’s perfect. You didn’t have to do this for me- god, I’m going to cry…” Rose’s throat tightened, hot tears welling up in his eyes. He wasn’t exaggerating.

“H-Hey, don’t-! Uh- I can’t take it back, but- I brought this stuff to make you feel better!”

Scrubbing his eyes to wipe away the tears, Rose spoke with a wobbly voice, “I’m touched, dear… You’ve done so much for me…”

Cactus’s large blonde eyebrows furrowed in worry at this, “You’re pretty emotional, you must be feelin’ like shit… Just gonna check somethin’, okay?”

That was all the warning Rose had before a hand was placed on his forehead, which then moved to his cheek, under his chin, and finally, behind his neck.

“You’re runnin’ a fever.” the larger man concluded with a frown.

“Explains why it’s so bloody cold in here…”

“Yeah, cause it’s not. You always got the heatin’ on. But, uh… Look, you take your meds, do what you need to. Want tea?”

Rose motioned to his half-full mug, “I’m good on that front, but thank you.”

Cactus nodded and pulled his coat off, hanging it over Rose’s shoulders like he was some sort of heated coat stand.

“Put that on.”

“Cactus, no- I’ll get my germs all on it, and you’ll…”

“No ifs, ands, buts, or coconuts. Boyfriend cold. Boyfriend get coat. Gonk get club, ooga booga, whatever.”

Rose couldn’t help but snort with laughter, hurriedly plucking out a fresh and blissfully soft tissue to clean himself up. His cold wouldn't even let him laugh without making a mess of him?!

The redhead blushed when he lowered the tissue to find Cactus smiling at him warmly.

“W-What, do I have something on my face, or…?”

“Nah, just thinkin’ bout how cute you are.”

“In this state?!”

“Hell yeah.”

Instead of frying his brain further to think up a retort, the Brit instead busied himself with taking pills and opening his soup. He couldn’t smell it, but it looked totally homemade. He’d need to bug Cactus about the exact location of the restaurant later. He took a spoonful of it, the flavours experienced even through his dulled senses.

“…Sorry it ain’t, uh… I mean- if I knew earlier, I woulda made some soup for ya myself, but for you to actually ask me for help, I wasn’t gonna make ya wait…”

“Oh, stop apologising, you silly thing. This is delicious, it’s perfect. You can make me your soup next time, I’m sure this stupid body of mine won’t leave it too long before the next bout of illness…”

“How, uh… How long have you known you’ve been feelin’ bad?”

“It came on this morning, so it’s only really been a couple of hours.”

“So fast? You’re in for a rough one, huh… Hey, see if your cousin can cover you the next few days. Got a feelin’ you’re gonna need the rest.”

“I couldn’t do that to hiih-.. hii…iihhm- hhiIESSHOOO!!” He’d managed to move the soup away just in time, thanking the stars for his increasingly dramatic hitches.

”Oh my god, bless you! Geez, that was one hell of a sneeze! They all been like that?”

“Ow…. Owowow…. Not all, but they’ve been pretty strong…”

“Yeah, you’re definitely gonna need to take some sick days, jeez… Thought you were gonna fall off your chair!”

Rose spluttered, cheeks further reddening, “I-It wasn’t that big…”

“Are you kiddin’ me? Your usual sneezes are quiet, rapid, and there’s, like, loads of ‘em.”

“Well, I suppose ‘loads’ is still right… It’s just… Teasing me!”

“…Mm, I know that feelin’.” Cac rubbed at his own nose, smiling knowingly when he saw Rose’s eyes widen at the action.

‘I know what you are.’ said his grin.

“I’m… I… Suppose you would, wouldn’t you… Hhu-uuh- hhaAH-!”

“hhrRSSHHHOOOoh!”

Cactus’s booming sneeze interrupted the redhead, giving a cough and a sigh before paying full attention again.

“Jeez, sorry. All these flowers, then… Seein’ you all itchy made me feel itchy…”

Rose was silent for a moment, as if he was in shock, then groaned.

“You stole my sneeze away!”

“Scared it off, huh?” Cac sniffled, “Hey, uh… Why don’t you, uh, close for lunch? Sure would suck if someone walked in while you were tryna eat your soup…”

Rose looked up at him, mind foggy and thoughts muddled. It took him a moment to connect why his boyfriend was talking so suspiciously, and why he had a slightly nervous look on his face.

“F-Feel free to flip the sign and lock the door, sweetheart. It would be awkward if that were to happen, after all…” He dabbed at his drippy nose and kept eating. Even if Cac was suggesting what he thought he was, Rose didn’t want this soup to go to waste.

“Maybe we should go to the staff room, too… These flowers are really startin’ to get to me.” The American commented, enjoying the shiver that ran through Rose’s body, one he knew wasn’t from the fever.

“Is that so… Poor thing, so allergic. Tragic that this is my job, mmm?”

“Is it tragic? Could be worse if you found my allergies super gross, or something…”

Rose picked up his box of soup and a handful of tissues and brought them to the staff room. Cactus followed after locking the door, picking up everything else left behind. Rose was already burying his face into a new tissue with a wet, honking blow, followed by hitches, and hitches, and… Nothing.

Sympathy gripped Cac’s heart, to see Rose succumbing to his cold so quickly had him wanting nothing more than to hold his boyfriend close, to stroke his hair. To help him along.

He took a seat next to the redhead, rubbing his back, “I really did scare it off, huh? Sorry ‘bout that.” 

“It’s… Guh, it’s okay… You didn’t mean to. They’re my flowers, after all…”

“You finish up that soup, then I’ve got an idea.” The shorter man stood up again, making his way to a nearby shelving unit. It was there that he found a feather duster - real feathers, and real dust.

This, of course, would be overkill, so he carefully pulled out a single feather from the bunch. It would help Rose just the same.

Only when the sick brit had his fill of his lunch did Cactus approach him again, nerves twisting his stomach.

“This, uh… I wanna try and help you, but if I go too far…”

“I’ll tell you.” Rose assured him, a smile on his face, “Believe me, I won’t be quiet about it.”

He scrunched up his nose again, clearly very itchy. Shaking his head again in irritation, he scrubbed at his nose with his knuckles.

“Gghghghh-!! God, this is driving me crazy. If I’m going to sneeze, then just do it, you know? Bloody thing…”

“Heh, uh, that’s… Well…”

Cactus brandished the feather in front of him.

“Oh, I see your game plan, big boy.”

Without further words, Cactus traced the feather flat against Rose’s nostrils, watching them quiver and start to run at the new irritant. It didn’t stop the dust dislodging from the barbs at each tickly sniffle, and soon had Rose’s teary eyes shut as he hitched, and hitched, and…. Faded away again.

He groaned, so Cac tried another tactic – direct insertion. This time, his nose couldn’t dare fight back against the dusty, pointed, yet soft tip of the feather tickling what felt like every molecule of his nasal cavity.

“Hh-hhgh-eeh-!! C-Cactus, I’m going… Going to… HhaAAESSHOOOo!! AadsshhEW-AASHHHheEWw! Oh my god, sorry, please m-m-move- hhaSSHEW-ASSHHOO! ATTCHHOO! H-HAAAHH… AahSSHHYEWW!!”

As Rose finally sneezed over and over, rapidly, harshly, and spraying on anything in front of him, he couldn’t think of anything but the incredibly itchy tickle in his nose that had to get out, now.

Cactus didn’t care at all that he was being sneezed on. He signed up for this when formulating this plan, after all. If he caught it, he caught it, and since Rose would enjoy that anyway, it’s no loss.

He actually felt his cheeks warming as the man in front of him repeatedly lost control. Was this…?

He was definitely getting turned on by the situation in front of him, but he didn’t want to overdo things - Rose was clearly feeling awful, he didn’t have to deal with Cactus coming onto him as well.

Thoroughly a mess, Rose blinked up through tears at his boyfriend, barely able to read his expression.

“Bless you, holy shit… That’s one hell of a cold you caught.”

“It’s… H-ha-aah… HhuUUH-IISHhhEW!! Ghhwah… S-sou’ds worse-”

“-Than you feel, yeah. But I gotta say, it looks about as bad as you sound.” Cac tugged out a tissue from the box with one hand, cupping it over Rose’s very red and irritated nose.

“Blow. That’s it, good boy…”

He followed instructions. He was, after all, a good boy.

“Feelin’ any better?”

“Idt’s- snfk! … It’s not as itchy as it was before… My nose, that is. Still something up in there, like the cold’s doing a jig on my poor nerve endings, ready to set me off at any time…”

Cactus swallowed, trying hard not to stare as he pulled away the used tissue.

“That sensitive?”

Rose rubbed at his eyes as he nodded in return, “Mm-hhb.”

Cactus sighed. Poor thing, feeling so sick, and so suddenly… Stuck at work when tons of people were off for the holidays… He could make his-

“Hha-aah-KKSHhh!! HhaPTSHHYEWW!! Oh my god, see? Any bloody moment…”

-day better, at least? Focus, Cactus. Improving Rose’s day doesn’t automatically mean sex.

Rose had sneezed his glasses off the moment prior, the pair falling into Cac’s lap.

“Oh- fuck, I can’t see a thing…”

An exaggeration, but Rose’s lenses were pretty strong. Giving them a cursory wipe, Cac put them back on for him, trying to avoid hitting his nose with the bridge of his glasses, nostrils red and twitchy, like they had a mind of their own.

“Ah- thank you, sweetheart. Now I can see your handsome face properly. Ah- that being said, I’m… I’m so sorry, you’re going to catch this, and… It really is quite awful, you were right the whole time… And I’ve been sneezing all over you!”

“I made my peace with that ages ago. You…” Cac swallowed again, forcing himself to push through nerves and make eye contact with his boyfriend, “You know I don’t mind. Look, uh… So you don’t keep freakin’ out… Can I kiss ya? If it’s pretty much confirmed already, will you be able to relax a bit more?”

“I… I suppose it’s too late now, anyway…” Rose sniffled, then blew his nose again, “I’m stunned you’re not running a mile.”

“Shush, ain’t nothin’ could scare me off.” The blond closed the distance between the two, glasses bumping awkwardly as they kissed.

‘His mouth is hot. Fuck, that’s so sexy. It’s a fever though, behave.’

Mentally scolding himself didn’t do much to stop him, though, the intensity of the kiss growing deeper until Rose pulled away to breathe.

“…Hah… Phew… You’re doomed now, then- oh!”

At this point, Cactus was practically on Rose’s lap, and the Brit was staring down at him.

“Well, hello there,” Rose grinned, “Someone’s keen.”

Oh. Fuck. He had an erection, and it was definitely pushing up against his boyfriend.

“Shit- sorry, you’re sick, and- and all miserable, and- fuck, you don’t need this on top of everythi-”

Rose pulled him in for another kiss, this one needy and wanting and passionate.

“If I’m going to feel like this, why not enjoy it? I didn’t realise you got it this badly. Before, it was sort of… The situation. But this…? You’re finding me sneezing all over you sexy, mm? I should apologise, really. This is my fault…”

“Don’t… Don’t apologise, fuck… I wanna do it with ya, but… Feelin’ guilty as it is.” Cactus felt his face warming shamefully. He didn’t wanna be responsible for making his boyfriend worse.

“Orgasms can help clear your sinuses. Consider it a treatment, Doctor Asta.”

The shame Cactus had been feeling quickly left and was replaced with lust. Rose was as into this scenario as he was, it seemed.

“A treatment? Guess I’ll have to administer it for ya, then. It’d be cruel not to, right? Especially if my patient is askin’ it of me.”

A pause as he considered his next words.

“Do they turn you on?” He asked, “Your own sneezes, I mean.”

“It would be quite debilitating if they did, but… I have to admit, the grip this cold has on my poor nose is quite titillating…”

“Mm, it’s getting chapped already.”

“So the short answer is ‘no’, the long answer is ‘yes, sometimes, if I’ve got a big guy like you here to share them with’.”

Cactus grinned and kissed him again, “And ain’t ya glad I am?”

“Mm, awfully so. It’s quite the cold, you know… In a couple days’ time, you’ll be holed up in bed, I’m sure, making your way through several packets of tissues. Goodness, if it can make my sneezes this intense, I dare not think what it’ll do to yours…”

Cactus slid his hands up under Rose’s sweater vest to pull it off expertly, “We’ll just have to find out.”

“Ehehe… Mm, your hands are cool…”

“Your skin is hot. Only you could run a fever the first day of a cold.” Cac removed his boyfriend’s shirt as well, not bothering to unbutton it. His own hoodie was discarded swiftly after, Rose watching hungrily as more of Cac’s brown skin and white vitiligo was shown.

“My god, I love you… You’re everything… I just want to kiss all these… These gorgeous marks all over your body…”

“Mm, yeah? You’ll have a tough time.”

“Why?”

“I’ll be too busy kissin’ all your freckles.”

As if to prove his point, Cactus started placing butterfly kisses on Rose’s cheeks, then his shoulders, which made the Brit giggle.

“S-pff-Stoooop, that tickles! Okay, okay, you win! I give! Haah… Phew…” Rose coughed lightly and pushed his glasses back up his nose, then quickly returned to touching his boyfriend’s torso. Then lower, and lower… So soft, so warm. Even with a fever, Rose’s hands struggled to retain heat, so he loved to steal it from him.

“You playin’ with my tummy, or are we having sex?” Cactus questioned, tone light, “Though, if you’re having second thoughts-”

“Nope! No such thing! You really think I’d decide, ‘no, actually, I don’t want to have hot kinky sex with my boyfriend’? If that happens, call a demon hunter, because that’s a changeling.”

Now that was taken care of, Cactus traced his own hands over Rose’s sensitive body, cock twitching whenever his boyfriend reacted, whimpered, or whined.

“I… I want you inside me, Cactus…” The redhead pleaded.

A nod. “Mm, good choice. Wouldn’t want ya wearin’ yourself out.”

“Lube’s in… In the drawer… Second one down, under the- the… HhaPPSSHIEW!! …The plant encyclopedia… We don’t really use that book, so… It’s a good place…”

Cactus blessed him as easily as he breathed, following instructions to find the small bottle underneath a deceptively large book. Who knew there were so many flowers?

“Okay, ya ready?” Cac poured out a small handful, warming it in his palms.

“I’mb- snf! -always ready for you, darling.”

Oh, the seduction of it all. And yet it still drove Cac crazy.

“Good boy. Pants off, and spread your legs for me.” Cactus praised him again, knowing how much Rose loved it. His commands were followed immediately, and he almost got distracted by how red and needy Rose’s cock looked.

“If you’ll excuse me, I’m goin’ in…”

He pushed a digit into Rose’s ass, eliciting a short gasp from the other man. Like the rest of his body, it was warm inside him, more than usual.

Expertly coating the inside before adding a second finger, Cac looked up at his boyfriend. He loved his expressions dearly, it was amazing how easily emotions showed on his face.

Just before he could add a third, Rose tensed, and tightened, and-

“Hhi-iih-… hiiih… Iih’SSHHEW!! IhpSSHh! Kktsh- hhaAH- AAHtsSHYEWW!!”

Cactus blinked, a deep blush growing on his cheeks. He wondered briefly what it was gonna feel like when he was actually inside Rose and he sneezed like that…

“…I, uh… Wow, bless you.”

“Guh, thank you, dear… This’ll be you, soon…”

“…Fingers in my ass, too?”

“If you want there to be.”

Once Rose was starting to squirm, greedily hoping that Cac’s fingers would hit his prostate, the blond pulled them out.

Rose whined.

“Just a sec, okay?” Cactus used his other hand to lube up his dick - not that it needed much help - and gently, carefully pushed in. Wiping his hands off on a nearby towel, he then held Rose’s waist, using the grip to start thrusting into him rhythmically.

God, it was so hot inside him, the sensation was incredible. They needed to fuck more often when they were sick, especially with Rose so eager.

“Just- nnh! T-tell me if… If it’s too much… I’ll stop whenever you-”

“Oh my god, Cactus Asta! If you stop, I’ll decimate you where you stand!!”

“Got it, no stoppin’.”

“Fffuck, I’ve missed this… I… Nnh… God, I love you… Hey, um…” Rose took his glasses off and haphazardly threw them on a nearby surface, “You can use that feather, if you want… It felt pretty… HhaANH~!! P-pretty good…! Maybe that’s an understatement, but-”

Before Rose could finish his sentence, Cac had needily grabbed the feather and was starting to tickle his lover’s sensitive nose with it, almost in a trance himself.

“W-Whoa- that’s… That’s reeeaahh… Really… HhaAH-!! HHAPt’TTSHHhewW! AAHGTSSHHOO! HH-…! …hhPSHHEW-AAHTSSHOO-AAYYIISHHHH!!”

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck, the way Rose clenched with each sneeze, the lack of any attempt to cover, spray glistening on Cac’s chest, it made the blond whimper with need.

“Nng-ghh… Bless you…” He swallowed the whine and almost growled instead, “Good boy… How’s your nose feeling?”

“Hhh… Hhgh-AAaahn..!! It’s… It’s itchy… snf! And drippy… Kind of sore… It’s hot, and that makes it tickle m-moohhre… And the… The d-dust… On that featherhh!! I-… I have to sneeeh… Eeehh… eeeze again…”

Rose was killing him here. He knew what it was like on the receiving end of this, so this teasing had to be on purpose…

It took one swipe of the feather under his quivering nostrils to set off another fit.

“HhaDSSHH! TTSHh-iiIISHh-iisHHEW! HHitSHh! Aah… Haaah… aaAATSSHYYEWW!! …Oh my god, this cold!”

Cac pulled him close, hugging Rose while thrusting into him now. It took all his self control not to bite the taller man, and he choked out another blessing.

“Nngh~ Cac, it’s driving me c-crazy- and… And… Ah- there!!” Rose called out, arms wrapping around his lover. He left scratch marks on Cactus’s back as he grabbed needily at him, something he would have to rub ointment into later.

Cactus kissed him again, fucking deeply and rhythmically, “There, baby?”

“MmhaaAAH~!”

“Yeah, that’s it…! Fuck- you’re so tight, so hot, I can barely take it! I… NnGGgh…” Cactus squeezed his eyes shut, starting to become overstimulated. He could hold out, but…

“Whatever you do, Rose… Nnhah… Don’t sneeze… O-or… Or I’ll cum…”

“What-?!”

As hot as that statement was, Rose couldn’t help but question it.

“I… You know me, how on earth do you expect me to not s-sneeze when I’m… I… T-this cold, it’s… And the dusty feather you-”

Cactus dropped the feather and clamped his hand over Rose’s mouth in panic.

“D-don’t-…!”

A mistake, as Rose then had to breathe through his nose, and with the dust from the feather now on Cactus’s hand…

“Mmgh-mmn!!” The Brit tried to warn him, but it was too late. Even if Cac pinched his nose now, it wouldn’t help. Tension built between the two, of the blonde trying to hold back his orgasm, and the redhead, his oncoming fit.

Slowly, worriedly, Cac removed his hand, allowing Rose to properly hitch.

“I-I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinkin’…”

“Hh-hhiIIH-!! I-it’s… It’s okay… B-but I don’t thiiiIIHHh!! …think I can h-hold back… for very long.”

All the while, they were still fucking at a good pace.

“M-Me neither… Fffffuck, is this what you were feelin’ the whole time? How the hell is it s-so- so niche?”

“Let’s not get into the iiih… HhaAH…! …ins and outs of… Fetish distribution right now…”

“R-Right, right…”

“Oh god, Cactus, I’m… I’m g-going to… Hhaa-AAah! Hh-iitSHHhhYEW!! aahTSSH-kktSHHh! Kktssh-SSHHYOOo!! HhaPTSSHHeww! Ohmygod-HHITSSHh! Iitshh-sshh-tsSHHh!! C-can’t stop- AATSHhOOo! H-hhaa-AAPsSHH! GGHTSSHUUu!”

As warned, Cac couldn’t take it anymore, and came violently during Rose’s fit. His partner was driven over the edge himself at the feeling of being filled while helplessly sneezing, making a mess of Cactus’s stomach.

“Oh… Oh my god… Fuck, bless you.” Cac panted, slowing down and pulling out of his lover, “Sorry for the mess inside ya… Couldn’t… Haah….”

“It’s… It’s okay… Wow…” Rose coughed, wheezing from the exertion, “I… Phew… Think I need my inhaler…”

Cactus fumbled around the desk until he felt a familiar plastic shape, then pressed it into Rose's hands, “I… hah~ I got it…” 

After gratefully taking a couple of puffs and feeling his lungs settle down, he felt something in his nose shift as well, and took a cursory sniff. “Oh, hey! See, I told you orgasms are a decongestant!”

“You sure did. When I get this cold’a yours, you wouldn't mind, uh, givin’ that treatment to me, wouldya? Got a feelin’ I'm gonna need it.”

[deoidesign]

A short comic I made for an anthology

[hakusins]

lord have mercy...

he's overcome with uncontrollable lust

[emahriel]

everyone: entranced by vessel me: oh, vessel... the man that you are. i wonder what iv's up to- iv:

[bizzyboysbizzydays]

Coughing up blood hey i'm still gay gay homosexual gay