#so much fun to deal with his emotions like oh shit. wait. what. really? this? damn
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Coming On Quickly (R18+)
Cactus/Rose (m/m), cold snz. Just under 5.5k warnings: sex, contagion talk, uncovered snz, cactus is doomed In which Cactus has to deal with some strange new feelings when Rose catches a particularly intense cold.
He felt fine. That’s what Rose told himself when shivering on the way to work. He picked up a cup of tea from his usual coffee shop, though a certain someone wasn’t working that morning. The cold air and steam from the tea was what was making his nose run, not anything else.
The morning was going well, even if he sneezed out of nowhere and dropped his keys as he was trying to unlock the door. Didn’t mean anything.
Another couple of sneezes when he was finally warming up and going through his morning checklist, and Rose finally considered the fact that he might’ve caught a tiny cold.
Just a small one. Not anywhere near bad enough to go home, it was just a sniffle. Besides, he had his tea, the shop was warm (for the flowers’ sake), and he was surrounded by handkerchiefs if he needed them.
His nose was running properly now, soft sniffles no longer enough to keep it at bay, which was definitely chalked up to the change in temperature.
It was a few days post-christmas. He wouldn’t even usually be open this time of year, but it was surprisingly lucrative, especially when his competitors were shut. You never know when someone needs some flowers! A last minute gift, or one ordered weeks in advance to be picked up on a day like today…
Rose sniffled again and rummaged for one of his own handkerchiefs. Didn’t wanna dip into his stock just yet, his nose was only a little drippy. And itchy-
“HheiH-KKSHh! Oh, goodness…”
He didn’t have to hold them back, he realised, but it’s difficult when it’s all you’ve known- ohgod, the itch was back-
“Hhi-KKSHhew! …Ow…”
Okay, that stung his throat. He snuffled into the handkerchief he finally found and flipped the switch on his kettle. He was going to need more tea to get through today, and the one he just bought was getting dangerously low.
His first customer of the day came in about half an hour later, wanting to browse and ask Rose his expert opinion on what flowers to get his mother-in-law to get on her good side for the upcoming year. When trying to offer up assistance, Rose’s nose of course decided that was the moment to start running like a freight train.
“snf! Goodness- please excuse me a moment…” He turned away to blow his nose, though he knew this wouldn’t be the end of it, “All this cold weather, you see…”
“There’s a lot of it going around this time of year.” The customer replied with a sympathetic smile, though Rose noticed them taking a subtle step back. He didn’t blame the guy. From all the dripping and blowing and sneezing he’d done, his nose was probably a cherry red.
“I sound worse than I feel.” He replied, unsure if he really believed himself. His muscles were starting to ache, “Sorry about that. Anyway, you were talking about her favourite colours? We can use it either as a base or as an accent colour.”
“I know she likes pink, but I think it’s the, uh, the really bright one that’s basically red.”
“Magenta?”
The guy looked confused. Perplexed, even.
Rose got out from behind the counter and took him to a bunch of brightly coloured carnations.
“This colour, dear.”
“Oh- yeah, that’s it! The bright pink!”
“It’s quite the bold colour, so I’d recommehhhnd… E-excuse- hhat’sSHHKk!! KkshHHEew!”
Rose realised as he sneezed into his elbow that he’d left the handkerchief at the counter, and that the double was very productive.
“Bless you!”
“My god- sorry- a moment please-” he mumbled into the crook of his elbow, hurrying back to the safety of his handkerchief. He felt mortified as he cleaned himself up.
“I’m so sorry about that, how unsightly, they snuck up on me…” He blew his nose with a slight honk, wincing at how productive even that was.
“Uh, it’s okay? Sorry to make you work when you’re feeling so bad.”
Well, at least this guy wasn’t an asshole. More customers should be like him.
“It’s not that bad, it’s just… Noisy. And annoying. What I was trying to say was that it’s a very bold colour, so it would be best as an accent against a more baby-pink or white bouquet.”
The guy nodded at him, looking now only a little confused. He seemed to get the idea.
“I’ll show you what I mean, if you like. Here- let me just…” Rose got out from behind the counter again, this time bringing his handkerchief with him. He picked out some white flowers – delicate things, big fluffy ones, some light pink roses, and placed them in his demonstrative vase, adjusting them so they were just so.
“So this would be the base…” He said, then going to grab a few more bright flowers, some lilies, carnations, and chrysanthemums.
“And these would be- b…be… Please hold-” he handed the flowers to the customer hurriedly, at least able to prepare his handkerchief properly this time.
“HhpSSHhh!! HhiITSHhew-aahSHOo! Goodness… Excuse me.”
“Bless you, sounds like it’s hitting you hard.”
“It wasn’t this bad earlier, I swear- hhaPSSHHh!!”
Rose sniffled pathetically, muffling a cough into his kerchief. “Sorry, I wouldn’t want you to catch this. Would you just- just put those in the vase?”
The guy followed Rose’s instructions, then the Brit adjusted the positioning of the brightly-coloured flowers so they didn’t overpower the rest of the bouquet.
“Like that. Is that sort of what you were looking for?”
“I don’t really know what I’m looking at, but, uh, yeah? It looks like a real bouquet, way better than what you pick up from the superstore.”
Rose nodded, hiding his streaming nose behind the now thoroughly-used white cloth. “Those bloody places… You know they use dye in the water to make their flowers different colours? Poor things, it’s not that hard to breed other strains… Anyway, thank you for the compliment! It’s words like that that make it all worth it.”
Giddy from the kind words about his work, Rose happily took payment for the bouquet, finished it up, and wrapped it in acetate and coloured tissue paper.
“I hope your m-muhh- hhGTShh! GgsHHh! -snf!- Mother-in-law likes it!”
“Thanks a ton, feel better!”
Rose deflated when he heard the bell on the door signify the customer was gone. How exhausting - and he wasn’t even a troublemaker!
He decided to rummage in his drawers to see if they had any medicine, brows furrowing as each one came up empty.
“Well, shite.” He cursed, blowing his ever-running nose again. He took a handkerchief from the piles in the store and made a note to write it off - it was at this moment he regretted making them scented. He wasn’t allergic to perfume or scents, but his nose was so sensitive from this accursed cold that-
“HhaPSSHHh!! PPSHhew-aashHiiee-iiISHHhoo! Hhat-TSSshh-SSHh-SSHHew! Oh my god!”
His eyes were watering now, and he dabbed at them with a dry corner of the cloth. Is this how Cactus felt when he gave him his number?
Speaking of Cactus, maybe he could swing by some medicine, maybe a box or two of tissues… Rose was fairly certain that if he kept using his handkerchief, his nose would violently protest all day long.
‘Morning sweetie 🥰🌹’ he sent the text. Cac had not long taught him how to use emojis, and he had great fun choosing the right ones for the occasion.
A few minutes later, he got a reply:
‘mornin, what’s up?’
‘I don’t always text when I want something from you, do I? 🗣️’
‘not always, you just sayin hi? heheh hi there cutie’
‘Well… Maybe a little more than just saying ‘hello’. Could you pop over with some paracetamol and tissues, dear? It’s not a big deal, I just can’t leave the shop unattended.’
‘ur sick?’
‘Just a sniffle.’
‘yeah, sure it is. gimme 20.’
‘Love you, dearest. ��’
“There we are. I hope he doesn’t worry himself silly.” Rose spoke aloud to himself, noting the stuffy and almost gravelly nature of his voice. Gods, he really did sound worse than he felt. He sniffed experimentally and found that instead of dripping, one nostril was now utterly blocked.
His nose felt hot and itchy and- wait, like something was moving? Oh- he squished his nostrils up against the new handkerchief to find that it was starting to run, even while supposedly blocked. How kind.
Ugh, and the proximity to the perfumed cloth-
“hhaPTSH!! AahYISHH! Ha… Hhhuua-AIITSHHhew! My giddy aunt, I can’t stop sneezing… Maybe toilet paper will just have to do for now… This blasted scent is too much…”
Rose sipped at his tea, but even the warmth from that couldn’t stop a shiver washing over him, then another stuffy attempt at a sniffle. A mistake, perhaps, as it stoked the embers of a tickle in his nose into flames, and he ducked into a wad of toilet roll, scratchy against his red nostrils.
“iiHhaPTSHHew! AAESHOO!! …Guh… Unsightly…”
Another shiver to make him cross his arms, and he pulled up a chair at the counter. He wasn’t usually one to use it, since he always had something or other to be getting on with, but… His arms hurt, his chest ached from sneezing, and he couldn’t seem to get warm. Was the central heating on the blink, or something?
…He couldn’t be bothered to go check. He’d need all his energy for if a customer came in, to put on a smile and save face. For now, though, with soft jazz playing as his store's ambient music, he found himself zoning out. Then his eyes started to flutter closed. He had things he should be doing, really, but… He just ached so much, and he was cold. Moving would lose him the warmth he tried so hard to gain.
The bell chimed, signifying an entrant, and Rose jumped, quickly wiped his nose, and opened his mouth to greet them.
“Hey, ain’t you a sight for sore eyes?” came a low voice, warm like spiced honey.
Oh, he could cry. What an angel. What a darling. Here to save the day.
“Cac…”
“So… Just a sniffle, huh? Sure looks like it.” The blond approached with an eye roll, then side eyeing the flowers surrounding them, “You’re lookin’ pretty under the weather. Glad I trusted my gut.”
“What do you-” Rose was interrupted by a bag being set down on the counter in front of him.
“Stopped by a pharmacy, thought you might need some more actual supplies. Go on, you can look.”
Rose took things out one at a time: cold medicine, thank goodness, a decongestant spray, cough drops, several boxes of tissues…
“Aloe vera? You’re a saint.”
Cac laughed at that, “I just know what you’re like. Keep lookin’.”
Wait, why was the bag warm?
He pulled out a watertight container with a thick liquid in it, and blinked at his boyfriend.
“You got me soup?”
“The, uh��� It’s… There’s a place right by the pharmacy, so it wasn’t outta my way or nothin’, and it smelled pretty good, so… Got you their soup of the day… Figured you probably hadn’t eaten. It’s minestrone.”
“It’s perfect. You didn’t have to do this for me- god, I’m going to cry…” Rose’s throat tightened, hot tears welling up in his eyes. He wasn’t exaggerating.
“H-Hey, don’t-! Uh- I can’t take it back, but- I brought this stuff to make you feel better!”
Scrubbing his eyes to wipe away the tears, Rose spoke with a wobbly voice, “I’m touched, dear… You’ve done so much for me…”
Cactus’s large blonde eyebrows furrowed in worry at this, “You’re pretty emotional, you must be feelin’ like shit… Just gonna check somethin’, okay?”
That was all the warning Rose had before a hand was placed on his forehead, which then moved to his cheek, under his chin, and finally, behind his neck.
“You’re runnin’ a fever.” the larger man concluded with a frown.
“Explains why it’s so bloody cold in here…”
“Yeah, cause it’s not. You always got the heatin’ on. But, uh… Look, you take your meds, do what you need to. Want tea?”
Rose motioned to his half-full mug, “I’m good on that front, but thank you.”
Cactus nodded and pulled his coat off, hanging it over Rose’s shoulders like he was some sort of heated coat stand.
“Put that on.”
“Cactus, no- I’ll get my germs all on it, and you’ll…”
“No ifs, ands, buts, or coconuts. Boyfriend cold. Boyfriend get coat. Gonk get club, ooga booga, whatever.”
Rose couldn’t help but snort with laughter, hurriedly plucking out a fresh and blissfully soft tissue to clean himself up. His cold wouldn't even let him laugh without making a mess of him?!
The redhead blushed when he lowered the tissue to find Cactus smiling at him warmly.
“W-What, do I have something on my face, or…?”
“Nah, just thinkin’ bout how cute you are.”
“In this state?!”
“Hell yeah.”
Instead of frying his brain further to think up a retort, the Brit instead busied himself with taking pills and opening his soup. He couldn’t smell it, but it looked totally homemade. He’d need to bug Cactus about the exact location of the restaurant later. He took a spoonful of it, the flavours experienced even through his dulled senses.
“…Sorry it ain’t, uh… I mean- if I knew earlier, I woulda made some soup for ya myself, but for you to actually ask me for help, I wasn’t gonna make ya wait…”
“Oh, stop apologising, you silly thing. This is delicious, it’s perfect. You can make me your soup next time, I’m sure this stupid body of mine won’t leave it too long before the next bout of illness…”
“How, uh… How long have you known you’ve been feelin’ bad?”
“It came on this morning, so it’s only really been a couple of hours.”
“So fast? You’re in for a rough one, huh… Hey, see if your cousin can cover you the next few days. Got a feelin’ you’re gonna need the rest.”
“I couldn’t do that to hiih-.. hii…iihhm- hhiIESSHOOO!!” He’d managed to move the soup away just in time, thanking the stars for his increasingly dramatic hitches.
”Oh my god, bless you! Geez, that was one hell of a sneeze! They all been like that?”
“Ow…. Owowow…. Not all, but they’ve been pretty strong…”
“Yeah, you’re definitely gonna need to take some sick days, jeez… Thought you were gonna fall off your chair!”
Rose spluttered, cheeks further reddening, “I-It wasn’t that big…”
“Are you kiddin’ me? Your usual sneezes are quiet, rapid, and there’s, like, loads of ‘em.”
“Well, I suppose ‘loads’ is still right… It’s just… Teasing me!”
“…Mm, I know that feelin’.” Cac rubbed at his own nose, smiling knowingly when he saw Rose’s eyes widen at the action.
‘I know what you are.’ said his grin.
“I’m… I… Suppose you would, wouldn’t you… Hhu-uuh- hhaAH-!”
“hhrRSSHHHOOOoh!”
Cactus’s booming sneeze interrupted the redhead, giving a cough and a sigh before paying full attention again.
“Jeez, sorry. All these flowers, then… Seein’ you all itchy made me feel itchy…”
Rose was silent for a moment, as if he was in shock, then groaned.
“You stole my sneeze away!”
“Scared it off, huh?” Cac sniffled, “Hey, uh… Why don’t you, uh, close for lunch? Sure would suck if someone walked in while you were tryna eat your soup…”
Rose looked up at him, mind foggy and thoughts muddled. It took him a moment to connect why his boyfriend was talking so suspiciously, and why he had a slightly nervous look on his face.
“F-Feel free to flip the sign and lock the door, sweetheart. It would be awkward if that were to happen, after all…” He dabbed at his drippy nose and kept eating. Even if Cac was suggesting what he thought he was, Rose didn’t want this soup to go to waste.
“Maybe we should go to the staff room, too… These flowers are really startin’ to get to me.” The American commented, enjoying the shiver that ran through Rose’s body, one he knew wasn’t from the fever.
“Is that so… Poor thing, so allergic. Tragic that this is my job, mmm?”
“Is it tragic? Could be worse if you found my allergies super gross, or something…”
Rose picked up his box of soup and a handful of tissues and brought them to the staff room. Cactus followed after locking the door, picking up everything else left behind. Rose was already burying his face into a new tissue with a wet, honking blow, followed by hitches, and hitches, and… Nothing.
Sympathy gripped Cac’s heart, to see Rose succumbing to his cold so quickly had him wanting nothing more than to hold his boyfriend close, to stroke his hair. To help him along.
He took a seat next to the redhead, rubbing his back, “I really did scare it off, huh? Sorry ‘bout that.”
“It’s… Guh, it’s okay… You didn’t mean to. They’re my flowers, after all…”
“You finish up that soup, then I’ve got an idea.” The shorter man stood up again, making his way to a nearby shelving unit. It was there that he found a feather duster - real feathers, and real dust.
This, of course, would be overkill, so he carefully pulled out a single feather from the bunch. It would help Rose just the same.
Only when the sick brit had his fill of his lunch did Cactus approach him again, nerves twisting his stomach.
“This, uh… I wanna try and help you, but if I go too far…”
“I’ll tell you.” Rose assured him, a smile on his face, “Believe me, I won’t be quiet about it.”
He scrunched up his nose again, clearly very itchy. Shaking his head again in irritation, he scrubbed at his nose with his knuckles.
“Gghghghh-!! God, this is driving me crazy. If I’m going to sneeze, then just do it, you know? Bloody thing…”
“Heh, uh, that’s… Well…”
Cactus brandished the feather in front of him.
“Oh, I see your game plan, big boy.”
Without further words, Cactus traced the feather flat against Rose’s nostrils, watching them quiver and start to run at the new irritant. It didn’t stop the dust dislodging from the barbs at each tickly sniffle, and soon had Rose’s teary eyes shut as he hitched, and hitched, and…. Faded away again.
He groaned, so Cac tried another tactic – direct insertion. This time, his nose couldn’t dare fight back against the dusty, pointed, yet soft tip of the feather tickling what felt like every molecule of his nasal cavity.
“Hh-hhgh-eeh-!! C-Cactus, I’m going… Going to… HhaAAESSHOOOo!! AadsshhEW-AASHHHheEWw! Oh my god, sorry, please m-m-move- hhaSSHEW-ASSHHOO! ATTCHHOO! H-HAAAHH… AahSSHHYEWW!!”
As Rose finally sneezed over and over, rapidly, harshly, and spraying on anything in front of him, he couldn’t think of anything but the incredibly itchy tickle in his nose that had to get out, now.
Cactus didn’t care at all that he was being sneezed on. He signed up for this when formulating this plan, after all. If he caught it, he caught it, and since Rose would enjoy that anyway, it’s no loss.
He actually felt his cheeks warming as the man in front of him repeatedly lost control. Was this…?
He was definitely getting turned on by the situation in front of him, but he didn’t want to overdo things - Rose was clearly feeling awful, he didn’t have to deal with Cactus coming onto him as well.
Thoroughly a mess, Rose blinked up through tears at his boyfriend, barely able to read his expression.
“Bless you, holy shit… That’s one hell of a cold you caught.”
“It’s… H-ha-aah… HhuUUH-IISHhhEW!! Ghhwah… S-sou’ds worse-”
“-Than you feel, yeah. But I gotta say, it looks about as bad as you sound.” Cac tugged out a tissue from the box with one hand, cupping it over Rose’s very red and irritated nose.
“Blow. That’s it, good boy…”
He followed instructions. He was, after all, a good boy.
“Feelin’ any better?”
“Idt’s- snfk! … It’s not as itchy as it was before… My nose, that is. Still something up in there, like the cold’s doing a jig on my poor nerve endings, ready to set me off at any time…”
Cactus swallowed, trying hard not to stare as he pulled away the used tissue.
“That sensitive?”
Rose rubbed at his eyes as he nodded in return, “Mm-hhb.”
Cactus sighed. Poor thing, feeling so sick, and so suddenly… Stuck at work when tons of people were off for the holidays… He could make his-
“Hha-aah-KKSHhh!! HhaPTSHHYEWW!! Oh my god, see? Any bloody moment…”
-day better, at least? Focus, Cactus. Improving Rose’s day doesn’t automatically mean sex.
Rose had sneezed his glasses off the moment prior, the pair falling into Cac’s lap.
“Oh- fuck, I can’t see a thing…”
An exaggeration, but Rose’s lenses were pretty strong. Giving them a cursory wipe, Cac put them back on for him, trying to avoid hitting his nose with the bridge of his glasses, nostrils red and twitchy, like they had a mind of their own.
“Ah- thank you, sweetheart. Now I can see your handsome face properly. Ah- that being said, I’m… I’m so sorry, you’re going to catch this, and… It really is quite awful, you were right the whole time… And I’ve been sneezing all over you!”
“I made my peace with that ages ago. You…” Cac swallowed again, forcing himself to push through nerves and make eye contact with his boyfriend, “You know I don’t mind. Look, uh… So you don’t keep freakin’ out… Can I kiss ya? If it’s pretty much confirmed already, will you be able to relax a bit more?”
“I… I suppose it’s too late now, anyway…” Rose sniffled, then blew his nose again, “I’m stunned you’re not running a mile.”
“Shush, ain’t nothin’ could scare me off.” The blond closed the distance between the two, glasses bumping awkwardly as they kissed.
‘His mouth is hot. Fuck, that’s so sexy. It’s a fever though, behave.’
Mentally scolding himself didn’t do much to stop him, though, the intensity of the kiss growing deeper until Rose pulled away to breathe.
“…Hah… Phew… You’re doomed now, then- oh!”
At this point, Cactus was practically on Rose’s lap, and the Brit was staring down at him.
“Well, hello there,” Rose grinned, “Someone’s keen.”
Oh. Fuck. He had an erection, and it was definitely pushing up against his boyfriend.
“Shit- sorry, you’re sick, and- and all miserable, and- fuck, you don’t need this on top of everythi-”
Rose pulled him in for another kiss, this one needy and wanting and passionate.
“If I’m going to feel like this, why not enjoy it? I didn’t realise you got it this badly. Before, it was sort of… The situation. But this…? You’re finding me sneezing all over you sexy, mm? I should apologise, really. This is my fault…”
“Don’t… Don’t apologise, fuck… I wanna do it with ya, but… Feelin’ guilty as it is.” Cactus felt his face warming shamefully. He didn’t wanna be responsible for making his boyfriend worse.
“Orgasms can help clear your sinuses. Consider it a treatment, Doctor Asta.”
The shame Cactus had been feeling quickly left and was replaced with lust. Rose was as into this scenario as he was, it seemed.
“A treatment? Guess I’ll have to administer it for ya, then. It’d be cruel not to, right? Especially if my patient is askin’ it of me.”
A pause as he considered his next words.
“Do they turn you on?” He asked, “Your own sneezes, I mean.”
“It would be quite debilitating if they did, but… I have to admit, the grip this cold has on my poor nose is quite titillating…”
“Mm, it’s getting chapped already.”
“So the short answer is ‘no’, the long answer is ‘yes, sometimes, if I’ve got a big guy like you here to share them with’.”
Cactus grinned and kissed him again, “And ain’t ya glad I am?”
“Mm, awfully so. It’s quite the cold, you know… In a couple days’ time, you’ll be holed up in bed, I’m sure, making your way through several packets of tissues. Goodness, if it can make my sneezes this intense, I dare not think what it’ll do to yours…”
Cactus slid his hands up under Rose’s sweater vest to pull it off expertly, “We’ll just have to find out.”
“Ehehe… Mm, your hands are cool…”
“Your skin is hot. Only you could run a fever the first day of a cold.” Cac removed his boyfriend’s shirt as well, not bothering to unbutton it. His own hoodie was discarded swiftly after, Rose watching hungrily as more of Cac’s brown skin and white vitiligo was shown.
“My god, I love you… You’re everything… I just want to kiss all these… These gorgeous marks all over your body…”
“Mm, yeah? You’ll have a tough time.”
“Why?”
“I’ll be too busy kissin’ all your freckles.”
As if to prove his point, Cactus started placing butterfly kisses on Rose’s cheeks, then his shoulders, which made the Brit giggle.
“S-pff-Stoooop, that tickles! Okay, okay, you win! I give! Haah… Phew…” Rose coughed lightly and pushed his glasses back up his nose, then quickly returned to touching his boyfriend’s torso. Then lower, and lower… So soft, so warm. Even with a fever, Rose’s hands struggled to retain heat, so he loved to steal it from him.
“You playin’ with my tummy, or are we having sex?” Cactus questioned, tone light, “Though, if you’re having second thoughts-”
“Nope! No such thing! You really think I’d decide, ‘no, actually, I don’t want to have hot kinky sex with my boyfriend’? If that happens, call a demon hunter, because that’s a changeling.”
Now that was taken care of, Cactus traced his own hands over Rose’s sensitive body, cock twitching whenever his boyfriend reacted, whimpered, or whined.
“I… I want you inside me, Cactus…” The redhead pleaded.
A nod. “Mm, good choice. Wouldn’t want ya wearin’ yourself out.”
“Lube’s in… In the drawer… Second one down, under the- the… HhaPPSSHIEW!! …The plant encyclopedia… We don’t really use that book, so… It’s a good place…”
Cactus blessed him as easily as he breathed, following instructions to find the small bottle underneath a deceptively large book. Who knew there were so many flowers?
“Okay, ya ready?” Cac poured out a small handful, warming it in his palms.
“I’mb- snf! -always ready for you, darling.”
Oh, the seduction of it all. And yet it still drove Cac crazy.
“Good boy. Pants off, and spread your legs for me.” Cactus praised him again, knowing how much Rose loved it. His commands were followed immediately, and he almost got distracted by how red and needy Rose’s cock looked.
“If you’ll excuse me, I’m goin’ in…”
He pushed a digit into Rose’s ass, eliciting a short gasp from the other man. Like the rest of his body, it was warm inside him, more than usual.
Expertly coating the inside before adding a second finger, Cac looked up at his boyfriend. He loved his expressions dearly, it was amazing how easily emotions showed on his face.
Just before he could add a third, Rose tensed, and tightened, and-
“Hhi-iih-… hiiih… Iih’SSHHEW!! IhpSSHh! Kktsh- hhaAH- AAHtsSHYEWW!!”
Cactus blinked, a deep blush growing on his cheeks. He wondered briefly what it was gonna feel like when he was actually inside Rose and he sneezed like that…
“…I, uh… Wow, bless you.”
“Guh, thank you, dear… This’ll be you, soon…”
“…Fingers in my ass, too?”
“If you want there to be.”
Once Rose was starting to squirm, greedily hoping that Cac’s fingers would hit his prostate, the blond pulled them out.
Rose whined.
“Just a sec, okay?” Cactus used his other hand to lube up his dick - not that it needed much help - and gently, carefully pushed in. Wiping his hands off on a nearby towel, he then held Rose’s waist, using the grip to start thrusting into him rhythmically.
God, it was so hot inside him, the sensation was incredible. They needed to fuck more often when they were sick, especially with Rose so eager.
“Just- nnh! T-tell me if… If it’s too much… I’ll stop whenever you-”
“Oh my god, Cactus Asta! If you stop, I’ll decimate you where you stand!!”
“Got it, no stoppin’.”
“Fffuck, I’ve missed this… I… Nnh… God, I love you… Hey, um…” Rose took his glasses off and haphazardly threw them on a nearby surface, “You can use that feather, if you want… It felt pretty… HhaANH~!! P-pretty good…! Maybe that’s an understatement, but-”
Before Rose could finish his sentence, Cac had needily grabbed the feather and was starting to tickle his lover’s sensitive nose with it, almost in a trance himself.
“W-Whoa- that’s… That’s reeeaahh… Really… HhaAH-!! HHAPt’TTSHHhewW! AAHGTSSHHOO! HH-…! …hhPSHHEW-AAHTSSHOO-AAYYIISHHHH!!”
Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck, the way Rose clenched with each sneeze, the lack of any attempt to cover, spray glistening on Cac’s chest, it made the blond whimper with need.
“Nng-ghh… Bless you…” He swallowed the whine and almost growled instead, “Good boy… How’s your nose feeling?”
“Hhh… Hhgh-AAaahn..!! It’s… It’s itchy… snf! And drippy… Kind of sore… It’s hot, and that makes it tickle m-moohhre… And the… The d-dust… On that featherhh!! I-… I have to sneeeh… Eeehh… eeeze again…”
Rose was killing him here. He knew what it was like on the receiving end of this, so this teasing had to be on purpose…
It took one swipe of the feather under his quivering nostrils to set off another fit.
“HhaDSSHH! TTSHh-iiIISHh-iisHHEW! HHitSHh! Aah… Haaah… aaAATSSHYYEWW!! …Oh my god, this cold!”
Cac pulled him close, hugging Rose while thrusting into him now. It took all his self control not to bite the taller man, and he choked out another blessing.
“Nngh~ Cac, it’s driving me c-crazy- and… And… Ah- there!!” Rose called out, arms wrapping around his lover. He left scratch marks on Cactus’s back as he grabbed needily at him, something he would have to rub ointment into later.
Cactus kissed him again, fucking deeply and rhythmically, “There, baby?”
“MmhaaAAH~!”
“Yeah, that’s it…! Fuck- you’re so tight, so hot, I can barely take it! I… NnGGgh…” Cactus squeezed his eyes shut, starting to become overstimulated. He could hold out, but…
“Whatever you do, Rose… Nnhah… Don’t sneeze… O-or… Or I’ll cum…”
“What-?!”
As hot as that statement was, Rose couldn’t help but question it.
“I… You know me, how on earth do you expect me to not s-sneeze when I’m… I… T-this cold, it’s… And the dusty feather you-”
Cactus dropped the feather and clamped his hand over Rose’s mouth in panic.
“D-don’t-…!”
A mistake, as Rose then had to breathe through his nose, and with the dust from the feather now on Cactus’s hand…
“Mmgh-mmn!!” The Brit tried to warn him, but it was too late. Even if Cac pinched his nose now, it wouldn’t help. Tension built between the two, of the blonde trying to hold back his orgasm, and the redhead, his oncoming fit.
Slowly, worriedly, Cac removed his hand, allowing Rose to properly hitch.
“I-I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinkin’…”
“Hh-hhiIIH-!! I-it’s… It’s okay… B-but I don’t thiiiIIHHh!! …think I can h-hold back… for very long.”
All the while, they were still fucking at a good pace.
“M-Me neither… Fffffuck, is this what you were feelin’ the whole time? How the hell is it s-so- so niche?”
“Let’s not get into the iiih… HhaAH…! …ins and outs of… Fetish distribution right now…”
“R-Right, right…”
“Oh god, Cactus, I’m… I’m g-going to… Hhaa-AAah! Hh-iitSHHhhYEW!! aahTSSH-kktSHHh! Kktssh-SSHHYOOo!! HhaPTSSHHeww! Ohmygod-HHITSSHh! Iitshh-sshh-tsSHHh!! C-can’t stop- AATSHhOOo! H-hhaa-AAPsSHH! GGHTSSHUUu!”
As warned, Cac couldn’t take it anymore, and came violently during Rose’s fit. His partner was driven over the edge himself at the feeling of being filled while helplessly sneezing, making a mess of Cactus’s stomach.
“Oh… Oh my god… Fuck, bless you.” Cac panted, slowing down and pulling out of his lover, “Sorry for the mess inside ya… Couldn’t… Haah….”
“It’s… It’s okay… Wow…” Rose coughed, wheezing from the exertion, “I… Phew… Think I need my inhaler…”
Cactus fumbled around the desk until he felt a familiar plastic shape, then pressed it into Rose's hands, “I… hah~ I got it…”
After gratefully taking a couple of puffs and feeling his lungs settle down, he felt something in his nose shift as well, and took a cursory sniff. “Oh, hey! See, I told you orgasms are a decongestant!”
“You sure did. When I get this cold’a yours, you wouldn't mind, uh, givin’ that treatment to me, wouldya? Got a feelin’ I'm gonna need it.”
#snz fic#dye ocs#i love these two so very much#it feels like a sort of tradition that when i get sick i have to inflict my own symptoms onto a character#i partially wrote this last time i had a cold#and im finishing it now im sick again HAHAHA#bullying Rose hours is just so real#that being said im running off very little sleep so if you see mistakes. no you didnt.#i dont know when exactly this takes place but it's after cac knows about the kink and just about after he gains it himself#so much fun to deal with his emotions like oh shit. wait. what. really? this? damn#anyway time to stop stalling and actually post this thing
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୨୧ be there for you ; lh43
➪ summary: luke always knows when his girl is sad, and this time it's no exception
➪ warnings: depression, fighting parents, kind of bad family dynamics
➪ word count: 1.6k
➪ cupid's notes: this is so weird because i'm listening to really hype music while editing the sad fics. oh well, i wrote this when i was sad so that's fun. also i reread this and i actually almost cried because i didn't realize how well i portrayed my own emotions in it so that was also fun
© cupidbedsy ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here
There was something about that time of year that caused her depression to hit its highest level. There were a lot of reasons that could’ve caused it, but there was none that she could say was right. It wasn’t seasonal depression, she had been asked that a plethora of times. It wasn’t a feeling of not being enough, she had been told that by multiple therapists.
She could say it was her parents fighting, her parents’ financial struggles, her brothers' snarky comments about how he couldn’t wait to move out and not deal with their crap anymore. She could say it was her family going to her for every little thing that went wrong, the amount of shit she gets from everyone in the family, the comparison of her to her brothers. It could’ve been a lot of things, but she wasn’t about to pin her depression on her family members, it didn’t seem right.
Every one of her friends and family knew she had depression, it wasn’t a secret. She felt as if as soon as her parents were told about her diagnosis they couldn’t wait to tell every single soul they knew. She felt like she was a story waiting to be told. She often thought that if she had a kid who acted the same way she did, she would know how to raise them better.
She hated critiquing her parents and her brothers, but they did it to her, didn’t they? She knew about the multitude of times her parents had gone to talk to her brothers about how she hadn’t been to class in a week, how she looked fine so there was no reason for her not to go. She felt like the little boy who cried wolf, however, for much different reasons.
She always said she was sick when she felt this feeling looming over her so her parents wouldn’t get worried, and they would let her stay home from school. But then, she would actually get sick and no one would believe her. She was stuck in an endless cycle.
Luke was worried. He had known about her tendencies to fall into this state of mind and not know what caused it. He knew about her family, the therapists, the psychologists, and the social workers. He knew about the multiple attempts everyone had made to get her to open up, about the amount of times she had screamed in her head at them that she didn’t know. He knew about everything.
It was easy for her to open up to Luke when they first met, he had this unmistakably calming and supportive aurora about him. He had bumped into her one day in freshman year, immediately apologizing for not looking where he was going. She had been on her way to the dining hall while he was on his way back, but he offered to take her there anyway.
Ever since then, they had been each other’s rock. Luke asked her out two months later and the two were practically inseparable. However, this was the first time he had experienced this side of her. He could tell it was happening just slightly, her face said it all. He wasn’t entirely sure of what to do, she had always told him it was nothing to worry about and it should be better in a couple of days. But it wasn’t.
She wasn’t the best at answering her texts, not wanting to face the fact that she was not doing well. She had been cooped up in her room for almost a week now, usually occupying herself with reading or playing a game on her phone. She wanted to go to class, she wanted to do her work, she wanted to do better but she just couldn’t.
She stared blankly at her phone as her podcast played through her earbuds. She had seen a text from Luke come through but she didn’t pay much attention to it. She felt bad for not answering, yet another part of her brain just accepted defeat and the fact that he might be mad at her. She had been able to get up and sit at her desk which was a step in the right direction, however she hadn’t done much since she got there.
She heard a knock on the door, ignoring it at first. When the knocking became more persistent, she sighed and got up. Her, Luke’s, hoodie fell from its original bunched-up place in her lap as she walked over to the door. Her eyes had dark circles around them, her hair was tied messily in the back. She opened it and looked at the person standing on the opposite side of the door.
“Hi.”
Usually, she would’ve been excited to see her boyfriend but at this point, that was what she dreaded most. Her face looked tired as she stared at Luke with blank eyes, “Hi.”
Luke nervously shifted his weight back and forth between his feet at the sound of her voice. It was hoarse from the lack of use, it had unfallen tears caught in it, and it had a hint of harshness laced in it. His mind flooded with thoughts as her voice reached his ears, he hadn’t been expecting it to sound that way.
She looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to say something more but he didn’t. The lack of communication between the two caused them to stand in the doorway for three minutes. Luke’s nervousness and awkwardness were seeping into y/n’s body language as she toyed with her hair and stood with her left foot propped up behind her right leg.
When they made eye contact, the tension in her body went away and her eyes softened, “You wanna come in?”
He nodded and she stepped back so he could walk in. Instead of going back to where she was previously sitting, she went back and climbed into her bed. The feeling of being able to be vulnerable in Luke’s presence made her want to curl into herself, she didn’t want to be vulnerable right now. She pulled her comforter up to her chin, creating heat around her.
Luke shivered from the moment he stepped into her room, goosebumps rising all over his arms. He sighed when he saw his girlfriend revert to her original space, moving to sit at the edge of her bed. He placed his hand on her calf, the sheets creating a barrier from them touching, “Hi baby.”
Those were the only words that both of them could muster, an awkward tension forming between the two of them for no reason. She just stayed staring at the wall in front of her. He let out a soft sigh at the lack of response and turned his head away from her to collect his thoughts. He wasn’t sure how to approach this, she had told him not to worry about her but he couldn’t help it.
“What can I do to help?”
She shrugged in response, not giving him her full attention. Luke slowly moved his thumb to start rubbing her calf in circles as a form of comfort. Another moment of silence passed again, and the two slowly started to become more comfortable with each other once again.
“Luke?”
“Hmm?”
“Can you lay with me?”
Luke all but jumped onto the opportunity she gave him, slipping his shoes off and climbing in behind her. He wrapped his right arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him. It was a mere five seconds before y/n was turning over and burying her head into his chest, “I’m sorry.”
“For what? You haven’t done anything wrong, baby.”
“For not responding, and for being like this.”
Before he had shown up she had hoped he wouldn’t even think about coming over. She hated when people had to see her like this. It wasn’t because of the way she looked but rather the thought that nobody would understand how she felt, that everyone would just complain about her problems.
But Luke was absolutely, positively in love with her. From the moment they met, the way he had been able to make her laugh within two minutes, the way she was able to ramble on about random things to a stranger amazed him. She had him wrapped around her finger since the moment they bumped into each other and there was nothing that would change that.
He frowned at her words, “Don’t be sorry. You can’t control it.”
“I just wish it would stop sometimes. Move on from me.” He kissed her forehead and held her tighter, feeling angry at the world for doing this to his girl.
“I’m sorry this is happening to you.”
Her fingers went to tangle into his hair, her frowning at his apology. She played with one of the curls that had been sticking out amongst the rest due to its length. Luke calmed down at the feeling and gave her a small smile. It was hard for her to return the action, not having anything to smile about.
Luke knew that was all he needed to do, just be there for her even if she said she didn’t want him there. Remind her that he would be there to support her through everything, even the parts she didn’t want him to know about. Reassure her that those feelings were common even if he didn’t know what it felt like. Love her as if the world was gonna end tomorrow.
LH43 MASTERLIST ; NHL MASTERLIST
TAGLIST ; NAVIGATION
#˚ ༘♡〚 cupids writing 〛ₓ。#˚。⋆〚 fics 〛#˚。⋆〚 luke hughes 〛#nhl#hockey#nhl hockey#nhl imagine#hockey imagine#luke hughes#lh43#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes imagine#luke hughes fic
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Hi! Can i please request about kidd trying his veryy best at comforting his s/o after a bad day and a stressful day? Thank you!
KIDD; how he'll comfort you
warning/s: none, very sfw, gn reader
note: smaller font is a subtext of the previous bullet point
* he isn't an emotionally intelligent person let alone an emotional person, so this is a challenge for him. seeing you not being your usual self and donning a pained front puts a bad taste in his mouth
* he wouldn't try to pry nor act differently, which would sometimes be mistaken as him not caring or acting indifferent. WHICH IS NOT THE CASE OK ✋he just planned something else to deal with it, something that only involves the two of u so no one else can try and talk about it (not that anyone would dare 😭)
* he'll definitely notice throughout the day that you're acting differently, forcing a smile amidst your dull eyes. he'll wait till dinner to tell you to meet him by the crow's nest
* once you reach the agreed place, you'd see kidd settled by the couch with his flesh arm resting by the top of the backrest where he left a space for you on the couch and cans of beer for the both of you. he was quiet and patient. such a rare sight for you
* once you sat down and have prepared to apologize for keeping him waiting, he had already pulled you in for a hug. his flesh arm that was previously rested by the backrest was now caressing the back of your head as he pressed it towards the crook of his neck
* "you think i haven't noticed you ain't yourself today? tell me what happened."
* as you gave him a play by play, he'd be an active listener! commenting and expressing so much emotions on your narratives
* "oh i'll beat them up, tell me where those bastards are!"
* "ah so someone's worse than me."
* "please tell me you kicked their asses. you did? hell yeah!"
* and soon enough, you'll forget about your problem because kidd will be on a mission on making you laugh. taking jokes from your narratives or teasing you and such
* even when it's approaching midnight, he'll take you out on a quick foodie date. then he'll take you to a pub to hear more about your day and ramble about his. really just to take your mind off of that shit you're carrying
* once you try and thank him randomly while walking home, he'll be very grumpy and turn all red 🤧 he's honestly just flustered and isn't expecting to hear those words. you'd even follow up with a kiss on a cheek which would give him even more butterflies and he'll go tsun tsun on you 😭🥰
* "w-what's with that a-all of a sudden?!" he'll say with a scowl and red cheeks as he avoids your gaze
* you'll say, "thank you for cheering me up, love. you act all tough but you're really a softie for me, aren't you?" while pinching his cheek
* "s-shut it! the alcohol's gettin' to you real fast, ain't it!"
hi anon! 🌷thank you for the request i had fun making this <3 i first had a hard time thinking how this dumbass would comfort his s/o but here we are HEHEHE i hope u guys like it!
#manga#anime#one piece#eustass kidd#cha writes#one piece headcanons#eustass kid#one piece x reader#eustass kid x reader#eustass kid headcanons#eustasscaptainkid#one piece eustass kid#eustass captain kidd#one piece eustass#eustass kid fluff#eustass x reader#eustass kid x y/n#eustass kid x you#eustass kidd x you#eustass kidd x reader#eustass kidd scenarios#eustass kidd headcanons#eustass kidd x y/n#one piece x female reader#one piece x gn reader#one piece x y/n#one piece x you
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EPIC - The Musical LIVE BLOG (bc I've never done one of these)
Damn okay vocals from Odysseus
THEY WANT HIM TO KILL A CHILD???
Yeah don't do it bro just raise him as your kids brother or smt
Okay he actually did it goddamn
Oh they hungry
Polites is such a little cutie omg I love him❤️❤️❤️
THE LITTLE CUTIE GOT TUNES OKAY POLITES I SEE YOU!!
I better see Polites with a lover at the end of these and they better greet him with open arms
Okay the lotus eaters are really cute
Never mind they're a hive mind okay😭
OH OKAY ATHENA OKAYYYY (Lil biased cus I'm a worshipper of her but whatever)
Ooooh sheep okay, I've seen this part specifically. Poor cyclops guy.
DONT GIVE THE CYCLOPS WINE???
Hear me out, maybe just flee the cave and don't fight the big ass bitch??
POLITES NO!!! WHAT THE FUCK!? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I HATE THIS I HATE THIS, FUCK YOU EPIC DIE KILL THE CYCLOPS IMMEDIATELY
Yeah die you stupid one eyed bitch and stay thay way fucker. I hate the cyclops. Fuck the cyclops man.
Hell yeah Odysseus remember them indeed. Mainly Polites.
Oh damn there's more of the big fuckers oh no
Oh wait the cyclops is lonely. Wait they left him and he went "Don't go" why the fuck does my heart hurt now. Fuck this musical man😭
Odysseus, my guy, you can't just say NO to Athena???😭😭
OKAY ODY GET IT BUDDY
THE INFAMOUS ODYSSEUS HELL YEAH
Why did the cyclops smile that was so fucking creepy.💀
Okay back to Athena hell yes.
Okay a little harsh girlie, you can't blame him for getting emotional there.
OKAY DON'T INSULT HER DUDE???
Oh damn the girls are fighting guys just hug it out please🙄
JESUS ODY THATS A BIT MUCH???
Valid crash out Athena😭
They'll talk it out don't worry guys😔
Oooh "Storm" okay
Is Poseidon about to fuck them over?😭
OH THESE VOCALS ARE HEAVENLYYY
STOOOOOORRRM (STOOOOOORRRRMMM)
Eurydice be positive omfg yall have dealt with enough death
Yall really about to shoot the fucking sky???💀
Ohhh there was an island okay I wasn't paying attention my bad yall
Oh wind god? Okay fun.
EURYDICE SHUT UP MAN POLITES WOULD NOT APPRECIATE THIS
Oh okay okay
How much longer till yo luck runs out duh duh duhduh vibe okay
Okay I get Eurydice's concern now I shouldn't have shit talked I'm sorry everybody deals with grief differently I guess😭
NOT THE FUCKING POLITES FLASH BACK ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME JUMP OUT MY BEDROOM WINDOW AT HALF TEN AT NIGHT????
Oh shit the passive aggressiveness
"I need to talk to you in private" Ooooooh Eurydice's in troubleeeee
Shit bro fr getting scolded below the decks right now😭
Oh the flute love that okay
Aeolis? How do you spell it???
OH SHIT HES A SHE??
I love her.
AWE THE LITTLE LOTUS EATERS AWEEEEE
Lmao this animator drew the lotus eaters twerking💀
Okay I really fuck with Aeolis (I do not know how to spell her name and I refus to use subtitles)
DAMN THE LOTUS EATERS ARE SHIT STIRRERS😭😭😭 "It's treasure!" "...what?" "Buh-bye!"
THE WAY HE HAS TO TALK TO THEM LIKE THEYRE KIDS DUDE💀 I love them bro
Shit they arguing😔
Okay they're almost home great wonderful awesome cool. And they all lived happily ever after and no one opened the bag.
For the love of fucking God don't open the bag PLEASE.
ODYSSEUS STAY AWAKE FOR FUCK SAKE. PLEASE.
MORON.
THEY TIED HIM TO THE FUCKING BOAT??? DUDE??? YALL ARE WARRIORS YOU CANNOT BE THIS STUPID COME ON😭😭😭
WHAT. THE. FUCK. DID. HE. TELL. YOU???
EURYDICE YOURE HIS SECOND IN COMMAND SURELY YOU TRIED TO STOP THEM OR SOMETHING??? FUCKING IDIOTS.
OH SHIT ITS POSEIDON YALL ARE SO FUCKED-
Oh damn he's yelling lemme turn this shit down.
Damn bro really just tryna chill with the waves and yall pissed him off because you're IMPULSIVE FUCKING BUFFOONS-
Shit the cyclops is Poseidons kid??? You guys are actually already dead write yo damn wills😭
RUTHLESSNESS IS MERCY UPON OURSELVESSSSS
I may have a crush on EPIC Poseidon...
Hey the sea man (with tentacles I may add) has got a point and I would listen to him if I were you I'm just saying like I'm totally not biased or anything because he's hot that's ridiculous-
Bro really would've preferred if he just offed his son omg😭
His vocals are fire tho fr
Oh damn the rest of his men are about to die aren't they😭
I FUCKING KNEW IT DAMMIT POSEIDON
Okay at least it wasn't all of then I guess?😭
OH DAMN HE STABBED THE WINDBAG OKAY-
Yeah okay that was such a smart move but also Ody you're such a little shit and it's hilarious😭🙏
Oh where the fuck are we now
Eurydice shut the fuck up nobody said you could speak be quiet.
HIS NAME IS EURYLICHUS? I GOT HIS NAME WRONG THE WHOLE TIME? FUCK SAKE MAN
Yeah no shut the fuck up baldy (that's what I'm calling him from now on cus fuck yall)
TELL ME MORE MEN DIDNT ACTUALLY JUST DIE MAN😭
Yall just... entered a random Palace because the voice sounded pretty??? NO WONDER ODY TALKS TO THEM LIKE THEYRE CHILDREN ITS BECAUSE THEY FUCKING ARE😭
"A woman😔" "...what-" Bro is so done with baldy and so am I honestly-
Ody is APPALLED at how easy it is to grasp these stupid men bro😭
LMAO SHES SO ICONIC WAIT I LOVE HER
Also you cannot tell me baldy was the only one to stand there skeptical I refus to believe that.
STOP I LOVE CIRCE WTF SHES SO ICONIC
SHE TURNED THEM INTO PIGS LMAO WHAT A DIVA
Baldy shut up bro.
HERMES YAY HERMES IS HERE
STOP I LOVE HERMES VOCALS AND THIS SOMG IS SUCH A BOP WHAT- THEY DID MY BRO PROUD IM SURE
HIS VOCALS ARE INCREDIBLE DUDE I CANTTTT
Did Hermes actually just get Odysseus high???😭
Hermes is just there for the drama bro. What. A. Queen.
"REVEAL THEIR TRUE FORMS" SHES SUCH AN ICON BRO I LOVE HER
The way she knew this was Hermes doing those two have beef I guarantee it😭
ODY LEAVE CIRCE ALONE SHE'S JUST TRYNA PROTECT HER NYMPHS DUDE
THEYRE LIKE HER DAUGHTERS??? ODY JUST LEAVE BRO😭😭😭
IS SHE ACTUALLY ABOUT TO TRY AND SEDUCE HIM TO SAVE THE NYMPHS FUCK MAN I LOVE HER
Okay if there's one thing I knew before listening to this it's that Odysseus like refuses to cheat on Penelope so I'm not worried rn
Hell yeah we love loyal men- NOT HIM SITTING NEXT TO CIRCE LIKE SHES A FUCKING THERAPIST BRO I CANT😭
I'm gonna pause and assume she keys them go with absolutely no catch whatsoever and then Ody gets home with no further issues the end. THE. END. PLEASE. IM DYING.
Damn okay R.I.P to the prophet I guess😭
DONT SEND HIM TO THE FUCKING UNDERWORLD BRO- WITH HIS LUCK??? HES FUCKED DONT DO THAT-
Awe she was in love?😭
I KNEW WE COULD FUCK WITH CIRCE MAN I LOVE HER
Let's hope they fucking listen this time man, especially in the fucking underworld???
Yall ever go to the airport when you were younger so your mom would scare you into staying near her so you wouldn't wander off? Yeah that's what Ody should do here.
Damn bro is being YELLED AT
YOU CANT SPRONG A DEAD POLITES ON ME LIKE THAT MAN ILL FUCKING SOB AGAIN I MEAN IT IM A WEAK BOY PLEASE
(I doubt Polites would be in the underworld, he'd probably be in the Elysian fields but fucking whatever man ignore me)
DO NOT FUCKING BRING HIS MOTHER INTO THIS-
WAIT SHES DEAD?? OH MY FUCKING GOD DUDE-
You've got me sobbing in the middle of my bedroom at that "Bye mom" Jorge I hope you fucking know that. You're paying for my therapy.
OKAY NOW YOURE YELLING??? SHUT UP-
Do we meet the prophet now-
We do yay.
Oh he's cute as fuck wait-
Bro is just refusing to help okay😭
Okay if you can predict all that could you not have maybe predicted all the current bullshit going on and maybe idk WARNED US?? Sorry I shouldn't talk about politics my bad🙄
But my guy is actually just refusing to cooperate what a diva
"WHO?" Bro take a wild fucking guess Ody-
Okay I no longer fuck with the prophet. He may be a diva but he's also a bitch so-
Ody: "It's me, hi. I'm the problem, it's me."
R.I.P Ody you would've loved Tay Tay
THANK YOU ODY YOU FINALLY UNDERSTAND THE NECESSARY KILLINGS FUCKING HELL DUDE.
SCILLA IS FREAKING ME THE FUCK OUT GET AWAY- IM TRYNA SEE ODYS REACTION TO BALDYS STULIDITY AND SHES SITTING THERE WIDE EYED FUCK OFF-

SHES SO FREAKY HELP-
EW WHY DID HER NECK FUCKING ELONGATE???
oh bro got snatched okay-
WHY IS SHE SNATCHING EVERYONE EXCEPT THE BALD FUCKER???
Okay but how many died just now???
Six okay, also stfu and sit yo Baldy ass back down Eurylichus
PUT THAT SWORD AWAY IMMEDIATELY LIKE YO DUMBASS WOULDNT HAVE DONE THE FUCKING SAME-
THEY STABBED HIM??? YALL MAD CUS HE LIKES WIFE MORE THAN YOU??? JEALOUS FUCKS-
THE FUCKING NECK OF THESE GUYS MAN OMFG-
Omg no pls listen to Ody- BALDY FOR ONCE JUST FUCKING LISTEN TO ODYSSEUS PLEASE-
You are not about to slay a cow that belongs to Lord Apollon bro😭
Idiots. All of them.
OH NOW YOU WANNA FUCKING LISTEN TO ODY??? FUCK OFF MAN YOU STUPID FUCKS-
I KNEW ODY SHOULDVE THROWN BALDY OVERBOARD IN SCYLLAS LAIR
GET THEIR ASSES APOLLON!!!
Oh or Zeus that works too ig I was excited to see Apollo-
WHY IS ZEUS SEDUCING A CLOUD RIGHT NOW???
This is grossing me out wait😭
EUGHHHH NO FUCK OFF I HATE THE MYTHS OF ZEUS DUDE😭😭😭
Lmao Zeus avenging Apollo's cows instead of Apollo is pretty funny to me honestly
Okay why are we dissing pride rn Zeus you homophobe-
LET THEM DIE THEYRE USELESS AS FUCK! THEY LITERALLY JUST STABBED YOU LIKE AN HOUR AGO LET THEM DIEEEEE PLEASEEEE
OH FUCK OFF BALDY WITH YOUR SAD PUPPY LOOK YOU BROUGHT THIS UPON YOURSELF YOU DUMBASS BITCH YOU CLEARLY SHAVED OFF PART OF YOUR BRAIN ALONG WITH YOUR HAIR
NO DONT CRY ODY THEY WERE USELESS ITS OKAY!
Oh 7 yrs later
Oh damn is this Telemachus? My boy rocking those dangling earrings okay-
NO HES NOT DEAD DUDE HAVE HOPE COME ON!
He has a dog???
Buddy you do not want to fight those monsters maybe just stay with you, yourself and... thou? And the dog ofc and Penelope I'm guessing.
OHHH OKAY L-L-L-L-LEGENDARY! GET IT TELEMACHUS!
Damn not them rocking up in the Palace just to disrespect the Prince wtf???😭
OWL??? ATHENA??? ARE YOU BACK???
STOP I LOVE HIMMMM
"Where is he ehememememe" SHUT YO DESPERATE ASS UP-
HOW DARE YOU CALL PENELOPE A FUCKING TRAMP???
YOU STAY AWAY FROM HER FUCKING ROOM!!
HELL YEAH TELEMACHUS DEFEND HER NAME!!!
BEAT HIS ASS TELEMACHUS!!!
STOP SINGING AND STAB HIM WTF???
HELL YEAH GET HIM!!!
THE FUCKING NERVE OF THIS CUNT??? GET HIM TELEMACHUS!!!
GET YOUR HAND OFF OF HIS NECK IMMEDIATELY???
TELEMACHUS GET UP OMFG-
HOW IS THIS BOY PENELOPES SON??? I KNOW DAMN WELL SHE CAN PROBABLY FIGHT LIKE A BEAST WHY IS SHE NOT TEACHING HIM???
ATHENAAAA YESSSS HELP THIS POOR GUYYYYY
YEAH UPPERCUT!! FUCK YES!!
YES ATHENA!!! FUCK HIM UP!!!
YES FUCK HIM UP TELEMACHUS!!!
GET IT LITTLE WOLF!!!
I HATE THIS GUY?? NOT TELEMACHUS BUT THE FUCKER HES FIGHTING-
Yay Athena has a new student and it's her old students son we love thatttt
Damn just tell him you were his father's mentor??? No? Okay-
Stop Telemachus is such a fucking cutie I can't-
OMG SHE HIGH FIVED TELEMACHUS BUT NOT ODY THATS AMAZING-
"You're a good kid..." "Thanks :D" I LOVE HIM-
Damn she really just hasn't even checked on him for ten years-
Athena, girly, you have missed alot😭😭😭
Damn now he's missing alright
Okay now who is this girly calling him "sleepyhead"?
LMAO NOT HER JUST BRUSHING PAST THE WIFE COMMENT😭
OH EW FUCK OFF??? HOMEWRECKER GTFO-
Damn okay it's kind of a bop though
Okay this is low-key SA I'm gonna be honest so I'm actually not gonna joke much about Calypso and Ody out of personal preference.
Oh okay he's just gonna jump off a cliff, cool-
CALYPSO HES TRYING TO KILL HIMSELF CAN YOU STOP HARASSING HIM FOR LIKE TWO FUCKING SECONDS YOU ANNOYING HOMEWRECKING BITCH I HATE YOU-
STOP SPRINGING FLASHBACKS OF POLITES ON ME!!!
let's not mourn the baldy he was useless anyway-
Valid crash out.
HE CALLED FOR ATHENA OMG THIS POOR GUY DUDE
YEAH GO HELP HIM ATHENA!!!
Wtf are the god games
Oh she asking for Zeus's help okay
Bro, your kid is asking for your help, and you wanna make it a game fuck off-
YAY WE ACTUALLY GET TO SEE APOLLO OMG
Okay, so, she has to convince all of them to help save Odysseus and then they'll let him off Calypso's Island cool awesome fun-
Imma do this in sections wait
Apollo
Love the vocals omg? Bro mad about the sirens. OMG HE DIDNT EVEN CARE ONCE HE FOUND OUT THE SIRENS WERE FINE😭 BRO SAID "TF AM I HERE FOR"
Hephaestus
Yeah valid reasoning very valid
LMAO HE DOESNT SOUND ARSED TO ARGUE WITH HER I LOVE THAT-
Aphrodite
Oh I love her
No I don't never mind.
Ehhh.
Ares
LMAO COMING TO BACK UP HIS WIFE AND ANNOY HIS SISTER I SEE YOU ARES!!!
I kinda love him
Oh oh rapping okay get it get it
AYE DONT DISS TELEMACHUS-
Yes Athena get his ass.
Lmao the simultaneous response between him and Aphrodite what a power couple honestly. Love Ares.
Hera
AHHHH LOVE HER
Lmao she's low-key on Athena's side she just wants a good reason. She's here for fun.
LMAO SHE WAS CONVINCED BY THE LACK OF CHEATING THATS SO AMAZING-
Zeus
Oh he being scary.
DONT YELL AT HER???
Bro don't get pissy because you lost
(LMAO ALL OF THE OTHERS LOOKIM AT ZEUS LIKE "UH WTF-")
GET UP ATHENA GET YOUR ASS UP-
GET UP GIRL PLEASE😭
YESSSSS LADY ATHENA!!!
LISTEN TO YOUR FUCKING DAUGHTER ZEUS??? WHY ARE YOU ACTUVELY HURTING HER??? YOU BITCH-
Oh not fucking Calypso again please-
YEAH HES LEAVING GOOD FOR YOU ODY!!!
Shut up bro nobody likes you
CAME ON TOO STRONG!? YOU FUCKING ASSAULTED HIM YOU WORTHLESS BITCH???
Oh NOW you'll say you were wrong huh? What's up with assholes apologising far too late in this fucking musical???
I do hate you yes.
Bro BE sorry for loving him??? HE HATES YOU AND HE HAS EVERY RIGHT TOO-
ODY DONT FEEL FUCKING BAD FOR HER? DONT TRY AND COMFORT HER??
Okay sad backstory, yeah, but that doesn't really excuse you assaulting him now does it, Calypso?
STOP GUILT TRIPPING HIM YOU MANIPULATIVE BITCH-
IS THIS NOT ABUSE??? IS THIS NOT ABUSE???
He should hate you and he has every right to hate you because you're a fucking bitch-
"Ehememememe I have all these negative emotions so it's your problem now EHMEMEMEMEMEEM" that's all I hear right now-
ODY NO! DONT TRY TO MAKE HER FEEL BETTER?? WHERE'S THE BEAST GONE?? WHERE'S THE MONSTER??? STOP IT!!!
I HATE THIS WHOLE SEGMENT AND NOBODY CAN EVER MAKE ME LIKE CALYPSO IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM! ARGUE WITH THE WALL!
Ain't no way he's getting all the way back to Ithica on a fucking raft😭🙏
HERMES IS FUCKING BACK WITH THE WIND BAG WHAT AN ICON!!!
HIS STUPID FUCKING LAUGH OH GOD I LOVE HIM SO MUCH-
Can I just mention how amazing Hermes would be at hosting a circus? Like je would fucking love the greatest showman
STOP BECAUSE HES GENUINELY ACTUALLY ROOTING FOR ODYSSEUS HERE LIKE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH MAN
Do. Not. Open. That. Fucking. Bag. I swear if this bag opens I'm suing SOMEBODY-
This song is such a bop btw
AHSGDHSKDHDGW I LOVE HIMMMMM
Love how he's low-key shit talking a sea monster
OKAY DONT GET CARRIED AWAY ODY PLEASE JUST THINK FUCKING LOGICALLY YOURE MAKING ME NERVOUS-
YAY HE CAN SEE ITHICA!!!
WHY THE FUCK CANT WE JUST LET THIS FUCKER BE HAPPY FOR LIKE TWO MINITES? POSEIDON FUCK OFF-
DO NOT GET IN THE FUCKING WATER-
Oh maybe get in the water actually...
AYE DO NOT THREATEN TELEMACHUS AND PENELOPE???
POSEIDON YOU HEARTLESS FUCK
Lmao he's really trying to reason with Lord Poseidon, get it ig-
LMAO ITS OKAY ODY YOU WERE SO CLOSE KEEP TRYING BUDDY
OKAY POSEIDON CHILL CHILL CHILL-
ODYSSEUS NOOOOOO
STOP. GIVING ME. POLITES. FLASHBACKS. PLEASE BRO-
BRO CMON YOU CANT DIE NOW-
OH? OH OKAY HE GETTIN BACK UP!!!
WHY THE FUCK IS HE FLYING WHAT IS GOING ON-
Oh damn was he just empowered by like three different gods???😭
Oh he screaming okay-
GET HIM ODY!!!
OH DAMN DID HE JUST KILL POSEIDON??
Oh he didn't okay.
HE OPENED THE BAG??? ODYSSEUS WHY???
Oh he threatening him-
OH- NOT THE TORTURE!
HES REALLY TORTURING A GOD FUCKING HELL-
BRO JUST TORTURED A LITERAL GOD TO GET HOME OH JESUS-
"Next to my wife" COLDEST LINE IN FUCKING CINEMATIC HISTORY- YES ODYSSEUS GO AND GET EM TIGER!!!!
Oh we back in the Palace okay
PENELOPE YOU WILL NOT CHOOSE A SUITOR BRO-
PENELOPE YOURE AMAZING DONT CRY I LOVE YOU-
I KNEW SHE WAS A BADASS!!!
NO DONT SET AN ACTUAL CHALLENGE FOR THEM PENELOPE THEY HAVE PLOT ARMOUR-
STOP GIRL DONT CRY YOURE SO STRONG WERE ALL SO PROUD OF YOU HONEY!!!
NO, YOU HEARD THE QUEEN, IF YOU CANT STRING THE FUCKING BOW THEN YOURE USELESS AND SHE HATES YOU SO FUCK OFF!
FUCK. OFF. STUPID. UGLY. BASTARD. I WISH SOMEONE WOULD HOLD YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU FOR FUCK SAKE-
STOP- NO- LEAVE TELEMACHUS ALONE YOU FUCKING FREAKS FUCK OFF I HATE THIS DONT YOU DARE LAY A FINGER ON THAT BOY!!!
SLIT WHOS THROAT?? I WILL CUT YOUR DICK OFF-
WHAT EVEN IS THIS GUYS NAME??? FUCK OFF YOU FREAK NOBODY LIKES YOU-
IF YOU TOUCH PENELOPE IM GONNA FEED YOU TO THE CYCLOPS-
EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW I CANT EVEN JOKE ABOUT THIS THATS JUST FUCKING DISGUSTING???
OH ODYSSEUS IS HERE? FINALLY!!
HES DEAD! YES! OLAY PENELOPE AND TELEMACHUS ARENT HURT WE'RE GOOD!
TELL THEM ODY!!!
KILL THEM ALL!! 600 STRIKES PER FUCKER!!!
HES BAAAAAACK!!!
yall ever play hide and seek in the dark? Yeah that's what this is to me-
HUNT THEM DOWN ODY!!!
FUCK YES ODYSSEUS!!!
NOT THIS FUCKER TRYING TO SWEET TALK ODYSSEUS SIT YO ASS DOWN AND TAKE THIS ARROW BITCH-
"Open arms insteaaaa-" "No :/" FUCK YEAH ODY!!!
YESSSS ODY
OH IT WAS TELEMACHUS!!! FUCK YES BUDDY!!!
OH YOU COWARDS LEAVE THE KID ALONE
YOU WILL NOT ALL ATTACK THE LRINCE FUCK OFF-
FUCK THEM UP TELEMACHUS!!! YOUVE GOT THIS!!!
ODY TO THE RESCUE FUCK YES
MERCY???
KILL THEM ALL ODY!!!
SCREAMMMMMM COWARDSSSSS
AAAAHHHH THEY FINALLY MEET THE FATHER AND SON OMG YAY-
Oh buddy😭
I'll be too busy sobbing to react to this part so uhhh yeah
See, this is why I can't watch father and son things because I genuinely do just start sobbing. I'm not joking, there's tears streaming down my neck it's really annoying me actually-
OH YAY ATHENA IS BACK FUCK YES!!!
GO AND SEE YOUR WIFE ODYSSEUS!!!
Wait I don't like that song title I thought they were already madly in love??? THEY STAYED IN LOVE NO??? IF I CRY AGAIN IM MAKING IT EVERYONES PROBLEM-
YES ITS REALLY HIM TF-
YES YOU ARE ODY FUCK OFF.
ODYSSEUS FUCK OFF STOP BEING STUPID YOURE STILL HER LOVING HUSBAND STOP IT😭
SHUT UP STOP MAKING THINGS HARDER JUST BE IN LOVE-
YOU WANT HIM TO TAKE AWAY YOUR FUCKING WEDDING BED??? PENELOPE ITS A TREE THATS NAILED INTO THE FUCKING GROUND ALSO WHY THE FUCK-
Oh wait she was just testing if it was him oh my god my heart stop fuck off I'll cry-
STOP SHE'S SO IN LOVE WITH HIM IM GONNA CRYYYY-
OH MY FUCKING GOD KILL ME NOW DUDE MY HEARTTTTT
Okay so uhhhh
Verdict: Masterpiece, absolutely loved it, never getting over Polites, Hermes is an icon and I love him, and this might be the topic of all my solitudious discussions for the next like month or so-
Okay it's half three in the morning GOODNIGHT-
#epic the musical#polites#odysseus#telemachus#penelope#hermes#athena#apollo#loved that#currently sobbing#i love them#goodnight
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heyy, can I please request ‘I love you’ prompt no.23 with Neal Caffrey from White collar?
Someone to Lose
a/n: Hi nonnie! This one has literally been sitting in my drafts for SO long, so sorry it took this long for writing this. I pretty much dropped off the face of the earth on this, but I'm back now until prelims, where I will literally drop off the face of the earth again (at least until christmas/new year).
'I Love You' Prompt: [23] = in an argument
Summary: When you find out Neal could possibly be forging art again, your walls are raised, not wanting to lose him again.
Word Count: 1.5k
TW: ANGST
You never thought you'd get here, sitting here in your boyfriend's apartment in your pyjamas with a mug of tea in front of you, waiting for him to get home, watching the clock like a mother waiting for her child after their curfew.
Which was almost the same situation, but at least your boyfriend at least had a tracking anklet.
Glancing at the clock you'd made Neal stick up by the fireplace (much to his protest) once again, seeing it just go one am, you take a sip of your tea while adjusting the piece of paper in front of you. It was a receipt for some replica art piece that you knew that was in one of the local art galleries in New York.
You didn't know if this was 'Peter approved' as you liked to call Neal's FBI art dealings or off his own back, but all you knew was that you had to talk to Neal about it.
Just as long as he got home before you fell asleep.
Hearing the front door click open quietly, you turn to face it, seeing Neal walk in with an 'oh shit' look on his face at the fact you were up.
"Hi." Neal whispers, looking guilty as he hands his coat and hat up on the coats stand.
"Hi Neal." You say back at a normal volume, bouncing your foot under the table, grasping your mug with a vice-like grip as you try to hide your emotions.
"Sorry I'm back so late, Peter and I were working on a case and Moz wanted to show me something." Neal said, walking over and kissing the top of your head before going over to your bed and grabbing his own pyjamas and starting to unbutton his shirt after taking off his tie.
"If you were working on a case, then what's this?" You ask after a few beats, obviously stopping Neal in his tracks as you hear the fabric stop rustling and his footsteps wander over before stopping just behind you, as Neal looks over your shoulder at the piece of paper sitting in front of you.
"It's a receipt for a piece of art by the looks of things." Neal says, plopping his head on top of yours as he looks down at the receipt.
You turn around in your chair, making Neal raise his head as you respond. "It's a receipt for a piece art that's put down as for you, Neal. What are you up to?"
Neal stands there with a neutral face before it going from one of guilt to betrayal to almost disappointment. But not in you, in himself.
"Neal, please don't tell me your pulling off some sort of heist with Mozzie again." You almost plead him, searching in his eyes for some sort of answer.
When you don't find anything except guilt in Neal's bright blue eyes, you feel tears brim your own eyes and you turn away from Neal, rubbing your nose.
"I'm sorry, y/n." You hear Neal whisper and your lip quivers at the thought of Neal going back to jail. You already lost him once when he was only a close friend, but now as your boyfriend? The man you hoped to spend the rest of your life with? You couldn't even begin to deal with the thought of it.
You swallow before flicking your head up to look at the kitchen, tears really pushing against your waterline. "Neal, that's not good enough. You can't keep doing this."
Neal audibly scoffs at what you say. "A man has to have his fun somehow, doesn't he? I haven't been fully free in years, y/n. I need this."
You get up and move over to the kitchen, holding your mug, and place it next to the sink before turning to face Neal as he looks at you with an unreadable face.
"Neal, you don't. You have less than a year left on that ankle monitor, and you could possibly spoil it all by doing this," you state, looking at Neal in disbelief. "Neal, Peter gave you a second chance at this. He's given you a job and a chance to make up for what you've done. Not everyone gets that."
"So what? I'm not everyone and I know that y/n! I've got away with it before, there's no reason to say that I can't do it again." Neal objected, raising his voice slightly.
"And what? Leave me here while you go off to some Spanish island again!?" You demand, raising your voice as well as your brow furrows, in shock at how ridiculous Neal was being about the whole situation.
"No! Of course not! But there's no reason why I have to keep playing by the rules!" Neal seethes, his voice raising even more than before.
"Really, because I think there is!" You countered, your knuckles turning white as they grasped against the edge of the kitchen counter.
"What then y/n!? What!" Neal yells and that's when you break, tears releasing while you finally snap.
"Because I love you!" You raged at him, hot tears starting to run down your face as you take a few steps forward and Neal's face freezes as he realises what you said, the whole room being draped in silence.
You and Neal had never really said 'I love you' to each other during your relationship. It had really only been after Neal had come back from Cape Verde that you'd said it, but even then you don't think he'd actually heard you, so technically, this was the first time.
You were living together and you'd never actually, properly, said I love you to each other.
"You what?" Neal asked, stunned at what you had yelled.
You take a few more steps forward, more confident in what you were saying now, approaching the dining table that Neal was standing around. "I said that I love you Neal Caffrey. And I can't lose you for a second time because you've decided to go and do something stupid with Mozzie."
Neal nods slowly before taking a tentative step towards you, reaching out and taking your hand in his and brushes his thumb over the back out it.
"Alright. I'll talk to Moz. If he really wants to do it, he can pull it off himself." Neal murmured, pulling you towards him and wrapping you up in his arms.
You let out a few sobs before whispering a quiet 'thank you' before burying your face into Neal's bare chest.
For the next few minutes you both stand there, being lit by the moonlight and the warm glow of the few lamps you'd switched on around the apartment while waiting for Neal. As you stand there, Neal strokes your hair, whispering sweet nothings against your hairline while you cry.
When the sobs turn to quiet sniffles, Neal releases you, but keeping you in his grasp, wiping the tears from your eyes before pressing his lips to your forehead and holding you close for a moment.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't think and I'm sorry that I left you like that." Neal whispers, eyes squeezed shut and he says it as he rests his forehead against yours.
You continue to stand there in the silence for a moment before you break the silence this time by kissing Neal softly and breaking apart from the hold you were in.
"Come on. Let's get to bed." You murmur and start to drag Neal back towards your bed and he takes his shirt off as he does so, quickly getting changed into the plaid pyjama trousers and dark grey t-shirt that he uses for pyjamas.
After that, Neal goes and quickly brushes his teeth, squeezing your hand reassuringly before going and doing so before eventually joining you in bed, switching off the lamps and closing the giant curtains you had gotten to cover the floor to ceiling windows that led you out to the rooftop.
When Neal does finally join you in bed, you hug up to him as you read, curving to fit up the space Neal took and after about five minutes of reading, you place your book down and switch off your bedside lamp.
As you start to drift off into sleep, you breathe out, barely audibly, to Neal, "I'm sorry for yelling."
You close your eyes and Neal kisses your hairline once again. "I'm sorry for yelling too. I love you y/n." He mutters as you snuggle into his chest.
"I love you too, Neal. Goodnight." Was your muffled response as sleep takes hold, so much that you nearly miss Neal's reply.
"Goodnight, honey." Neal muttered, letting sleep grasp onto his own body, succumbing to the droop of his eyelids as a silent serenity surrounded your apartment.
And it really was now that you knew Neal was really there with you and he wasn't going to risk it.
a/n: woo! it's done! Also, even if you don't want to put in a request, talk to me about Austin Grand Prix (like, the whole Norris/Verstappen situation at the corner, oooh I have some opinions), anyway have a nice whatever!
requests are open!
#writing#writers#white collar#neal caffrey#neal caffrey x reader#neal caffrey x fem!reader#white collar fanfic#white collar one-shot
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More than a friendship
F bodied reader x Lee Felix 💕🎧
Tw! Smut, Cursing, and Fluff 🍬
——————————————————————————
Felix was your best friend. There was no doubt in that.
You two had something special. A bond that couldn’t be labeled. Oh how you loved Felix.
And he loved you.
Your other friend’s constantly nagged at you when it came to Felix. Everyone could see what you couldn’t. Every time someone said he liked you, or suggested that you be together you simply shrugged it off. Blocked it out of your head. You couldn’t afford to lose such a pure and lovely friendship.
But did you have feelings for him?
Yes. Yes you did.
Someone like Felix deserved so much more than you could offer. You knew that. He was too perfect in every way. You would burden him. Besides, nothing ever worked out in your favor. Chances are if you did attempt to be something more than friends with him, he’d end up despising you. Something would happen. Something would go wrong. That’s how it always fucking went. 
Despite how much you wanted to protect this friendship, you ended up on Felix’s doorstep, four glasses of whisky in. Like an idiot.
It’s been a rough night… and you’re really looking for some comfort. You were at the bar with some of your friends when they all left you for a hookup. It wasn’t a big deal. Not at all. Usually you’d be cool with it. But you were drunk and sensitive. You felt that you needed some company. You were tired of feeling left out. You watched as your friends got action all the fucking time. Dates, hookups, relationships. It would be nice if you got something for once.
You were aching for Felix’s attention at this point.
So here you were, standing at his door debating on if you should knock or not. You drew in a deep breath, finally knocking a few times. It was cold out and late. You wouldn’t be surprised if he was asleep.
You waited for a bit, feeling disappointment come over you. You really didn’t want to go home.. to be all alone.
The door opened and your eyes lit up. A sleepy Felix in a white t-shirt and baggy sweat pants stood in front of you. It was clear he had been in bed. “Y/n?” He spoke in a groggy, tired voice. “Ah- Felix. Shit. Were you sleeping?”
“Not yet. I was just laying down,” he smiled and stepped back from the door. “Come in.” Immediately you walked in, kicking your shoes off at his door. You were hit by the darling scent of his home. His home was truly your safe spot. It was always welcoming, warm, and safe. It never failed to calm your nerves. “I’m sorry for coming so late with no warning… I just really needed to see you.”
“You know you’re always welcome here, y/n.” Felix hummed and ruffled your hair. “You’re drunk, right? You smell like alcohol.” You only grinned to his question, finding it amusing that he was able to tell your state of sobriety so quickly.
“Is everything alright? Wanna tell me what’s going on?” He spoke in a much softer voice, his eyes heavy on your face. He was trying to read your emotions. Of course it confused the hell out of him for you to show up drunk like this. It wasn’t really normal behavior from you.
“Mm… yeah. Everything’s fine I guess. I just felt pretty lonely,” you admitted, eyes on the ground. This was stupid wasn’t it?
Felix smiled and motioned for you to follow him with his hand. He lead you to his couch and left you there while he made you a cup of tea. He knew just how you liked it, extra sugar. He returned with the tea, carefully handing it to you before taking a seat next to you, your thighs touching. “So… what caused you to go out and get drunk tonight?”
“My girls wanted to go out. Do something fun. I ended up sitting at the bar alone the entire time,” you sighed lightly before taking a sip of your tea. “Why’s that? Did they ditch you?”
“Well.. not necessarily. I knew it was their plan to get laid the whole time. I’m not sure what I was expecting, or why I said yes.” You said honestly, a small giggle escaping your lips.
“Why didn’t you?”
“Why didn’t I what?”
“Get laid.”
You cocked an eyebrow at Felix and sat your glass down on the small coffee table in front of his couch. “Do I seem like the type to go out and do that? Come on, Felix. You know me. I refuse to hookup with some random stranger I met while drunk.”
“Yeah but… you could always try it.” He said with a shrug.
“Nu uh. No way. Every time I’ve had sex it’s been a disaster anyways.”
“How so?” Felix asked with an entertained smile.
“Well… you know. They never.. get the right spots.”
Felix laughed a bit, his shoulders bouncing as he did so. “You poor thing,” he teased, shaking his head as he leaned back against the couch completely.
“I’ve lost all hope when it comes to sex,” you chuckled and rolled your eyes. “I’ve come to the conclusion that clits are invisible to all men.”
Felix laughed again, his cute smile on display for you. It made your heart ache. “We aren’t all bad. I’d like to think I know my way around the female body pretty good.”
“I’m sure you do,” you hummed sarcastically.
The thought of Felix doing… dirty things drove you crazy. He seemed so innocent. So pure. It made your heart race to hear him speak of such stuff.
“I do!”
“I’m sure that’s what you’ve been told.”
You laughed when Felix planted a soft smack on your arm, your sarcasm frustrating him.
You two chatted for over an hour, the time passing by so fast. It always did when you were with Felix.
“I should head out. Thank you for spending time with me on such short notice.”
“No way. You’re drunk. Just sleep here, y/n it’s really no problem.”
“I think I’ve caused enough issues for you. It’s okay.” You smiled and stood up. He grabbed your arm and forced you back down on the couch. “Stay here. It’s okay. I promise. You haven’t caused a single issue for me. Not ever.”
Your heart raced as you looked into his pretty doe eyes. You were sobering up at this point, yet you felt even more drunk now in Felix’s overwhelming presence. Maybe you were just really drunk, but you suddenly felt the urge to do nasty things with him.
You wondered how it would feel to have your tongue against his. You wondered how his hot skin would feel against yours. How your nails would feel digging into his skin as he fucked you messily. How his praises would sound. How his deep voice in your ear would send shivers throughout your body.
You were needy for him. Really needy. And this is something that hadn’t ever happened.
You gulped and pressed your legs together, silence filling the room as you looked at each other. Something about his gaze felt dark, sexy.
“Y/n?” Felix whispered, his way of asking what the actual hell was going on right now. A question you couldn’t answer. The sudden tension in this room was suffocating.
You couldn’t hold back anymore. Fuck it. Fuck everything.
Felix is all you needed right now.
You suddenly and quickly climbed into his lap and took him into a needy and heated kiss. He was shocked. It was clear with the way he didn’t kiss back or touch you. But within a few seconds he recovered and happily embraced everything that was happening.
He had wanted this for so long.
Felix broke the kiss to look at you, his hands slowly sliding up and down your sides. He squeezed your waist and leaned in, his lips attacking your neck. He took his time making dark marks on you, fully aware that others would see them. He wanted that. He wanted everyone to think you were taken. He wanted you to be his. “Felix,” you whined out and pressed yourself against his lap.
A groan escaped his throat as he laid you down, getting on top of you. He kissed you more. As hard as he fucking could. He didn’t pull away until his lips were sore.
He broke the kiss and began to lift up your shirt, pulling it up until you were exposed. He eyed your tits covered by your pretty dark blue bra. He almost lost it right fucking there. You looked like a wet dream.
He lifted you up a bit, enough to get his hands behind you and unclasp your bra. He threw the piece of fabric somewhere, getting pretty distracted by your now bare chest. His dick twitched with the view. He waisted no time going in, his wet lips starting at your neck, then making their way down to your pretty tits. He grunted as he took one of your buds into his mouth, licking and sucking at it. His fingers began to work on your other nipple, twisting and pinching it. It was sending waves of pleasure throughout your body. It felt good, really good, and it was a fucking sexy sight to watch Felix suck on your tits. You paid close attention to the way his tongue moved around your nipple… to the way that it seemed like he was enjoying this. Like he was hungry for you.
Fuck.
You placed one of you hands into his hair, tugging at it as he took his time working on your nipples. Finally he moved his lips down your stomach, positioning himself in between your shaky legs. Your heart was absolutely racing at this point. You felt like a nervous wreck, like one touch will send you into shock.
Felix could tell you were anxious to be touched. He liked that. It made him feel fucking proud. He had never had such an effect over somebody.
He kissed at your stomach as his fingers gently rubbed at your clothed core. You jerked with his hand placement. Even with the thick fabric covering you, it was too much. “Felix- Ngh.”
He grinned at you as he pulled away, taking your shorts and panties off in a swift but smooth motion. “Fuck,” he whispered underneath his breath as his eyes landed on your exposed pussy. “Pretty. Such a pretty girl.” His words made your entire face flush. You were soaked and it was clear. He ran a finger up your slick, a gasp escaping from your lips. “How are you already so wet?” He teased with a cocky chuckle. “Fuck you really are needy for me, aren’t you?”
You nodded, feeling out of breath with the tiny bit of contact you guys have made. You didn’t have time to catch it either. Not when Felix’s finger pressed against your clit.
Shit. He wasn’t lying earlier. He does know his way around a woman’s body.
A moan fell from your lips as you spread your legs for him, a silent way of telling him that you were ready. That you wanted more.
Felix simply gave you a charming smile before diving In between your legs. You hadn’t been expecting this so suddenly. You figured there would be at least a bit more foreplay. But no. His tongue was now running up and down your soaked cunt, taking in your flavor. You tasted so damn good to him.
Constant moans escaped your lips as satisfied hums left his. He ran the tip of his tongue over your clit, causing the muscles in your legs to tense up. “Oh- God. Mm-“
He started to properly eat you out after that, his tongue working wonders on your pussy. This was the best fucking head you’d ever had period. You didn’t even know it could feel this good.
You roughly grabbed at his hair with both hands, keeping his head down, making sure he wouldn’t pull away. He wasn’t going to anyways. He was enjoying this as much as you were.
“Felix- fuck. That’s so good-“ you praised, your eyes rolling back into your head out of pure pleasure. You knew you wouldn’t last long, not at this rate.
You focused on the way his tongue moved all over your cunt. The way it was warm and fast. God. He really knew how to use his mouth.
You let go of his hair and instead gripped the sides of his couch as you came. Fucking hard too. Your body jerked completely as loud, lewd noises spilled out of your mouth.
He pulled away and watched you as you recovered, sitting there with your chest heaving.
“How was it?” He innocently teased, knowing that it was good. That would’ve been clear to anyone that saw you. The way you were whimpering and squirming was a dead giveaway.
“Good… really good,” you whispered weakly. Just when you thought it couldn’t get better he stood up and stripped. You eyed him like candy as he revealed his toned and gorgeous body to you. And fuck. His cock was big.
“Don’t you think I deserve something in return?” He asked seductively as he walked in front of you, lifting your chin with his finger. “Look at me.” You looked at him, your throat going dry. He was being so hot. “Yes… you do,” you finally answered.
“Open wide,” he directed, your mouth dropping open without a second thought. Felix snickered at your neediness and pushed you off the couch, onto your knees right in front of his hardness.
He grabbed his length and guided it into your mouth, making it clear he wanted full control over this. You groaned once his tip was in your mouth, the salty flavor of his precum making your mouth water.
Felix grabbed the back of your hair as he started to fuck your mouth. He didn’t give it much time until he was thrusting himself into your mouth at a fast pace. You were constantly choking a little bit on him. You didn’t mind. This was good. It felt really good to please him. The pleased expressions on his face made it all worth it.
He groaned loudly, his eyes not moving away from you for one second. You looked so slutty doing this for him. So dirty. He wished he could take a fucking picture and keep it forever. “Good girl. Taking my cock so well,” he purred.
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted this, hm? How much I’ve thought about this very moment. You are so unreal, y/n. So perfect.”
You closed your eyes and relaxed your throat completely, allowing him to go as deep and as fast as he needed. Drool was rubbing down your chin and chest from how sloppy his thrusts were. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” He cursed in a low voice, sending chills up your spine.
Felix came pretty soon, your name leaving his mouth several times as he did so. You swallowed every drop proudly.
He slowly pulled his dick out of your mouth and looked down at you with a tired smile. “Damn… I was not expecting this to happen.”
“Me neither,” you whispered shyly and looked down.
“I’m glad it did,” he muttered, making you look back up at him. He offered a hand to help you up out of the floor and lead you to his bed.
Felix held you all night. And then all morning.
It was a dream come true.
Thank God for the alcohol in your system. For the encouragement to do all of this. It changed your life forever.
Felix was now all yours. And you were all his.
#stray kids#lee felix#felix smut#stray kids felix#skz felix#skz fluff#skz smut#felix fluff#stray kids smut#kpop smut#kpop fanfic#kpop#kpop fluff#smut
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RANDOM THOUGHTS: Unknown ep. 10
I’m going into this episode hoping for further progress in Qian and Yuan’s relationship (especially after Qian’s moment of introspection at the end of the previous episode). We also saw in the preview that we’re getting more about Qian’s health status in this episode and that Yuan might get pissed at Qian for keeping that from him. And then, let’s see if they cut the episode before the kiss or not.
Shitless Qian! That’s a nice start (if we ignore the nosebleed, which, to be fair, isn’t that ignorable).
The way Yuan stared at shirtless Qian… I mean, 100% relatable.
I wouldn’t want to sleep alone after that Russian roulette shit either.
The way they’re fucking snuggling in bed! Qian’s leg over Yuan’s, Qian holding Yuan’s arm with both hands, and Qian brushing his thumb on Yuan’s arm in that comforting manner…
Wait, Le is worried Qian’s condition has worsened? So, he knows that Qian has a chronic condition? (I can’t remember if this has been mentioned before or not. My memory is hella fuzzy when there’s a whole week’s wait between episodes.) Perhaps that’s why Le’s been so adamant to keep Qian out of the gang and make sure they don’t cross paths again.
Nosebleed again…
”I’m fine.” The biggest lie ever told (and most used) in the history of humanity.
The way I cackled when the Doc suggested that San Pang should also get a neurological examination.
WTF! Nosebleed again… Please, Qian, get yourself checked out!
The whole ”don’t tell Yuan” will cause more trouble than actually telling him, though. I’m sure that’s why Yuan avoids Qian (the short snippet, in the preview of this episode, when Yuan walks into the house). I’ve been in Yuan’s shoes, and it fucking hurts when the truth comes out later than it needed to.
Yuan must’ve heard more than he let on. He practically tried to run away from the clinic. And the fact that Qian is lying to Yuan… Trouble, trouble.
I don’t mind that Yuan is getting bold (or, bolder). The talk about tying up Qian… I’m on board with that to a million percent!
Yuan definitely knows something serious is going on. But how much does he know about the whole truth? Most likely a lot more than he lets on. Like I wrote before, he must’ve heard what the Doc said. But he might not yet know how long it’s been serious. Qian has had issues for years, right?
Oh lord… Look at these idiots trying to cover up for Qian. I’ve got to love their loyalty to Qian, though. Even though I need someone to tell Yuan the truth (preferably Qian, but I don’t think that will happen…).
Seriously, I would fucking snap if I was in Yuan’s shoes. No way I would take part in this bullshit coverup. Either you tell me the truth (because that’s always easier to deal with) or I’ll avoid you like the fucking plague.
Lol, Yuan is really laying it on thick when he talks to San Pang. Emotional blackmail. But the situation clearly calls for it. Qian is more silent than a brick wall.
And then he uses the Lili-card. He knows exactly what to say to get San Pang to cave. I love him. So, please, someone tell him the truth, for fuck’s sake!
Just as I thought, Yuan heard everything at the clinic that day.
Finally! The truth is out. Thank you, San Pang.
Yuan: ”Do you still think this is just about you?” That FUCKING. BROKE. ME.
I’ve been sitting here, trying to get my eyes to stop leaking for the past 30-ish minutes so I can watch the rest of the episode. What is this series doing to me? They’re gunning for my emotions with Yuan’s reaction because it’s relatable to me.
Qian must know he fucked up, though. If he blames San Pang for telling Yuan, I’ll be fighting back an urge to kick his shin. (I know he’s fictional, but that also means I can give him a fictional kick, just for the fun of it.)
I can’t call that blaming San Pang. Not really. Okay, Qian, I won’t fictionally kick your shin. Not right now, at least…
Btw, San Pang not telling Lili about Qian’s condition… She’ll be just as pissed at him as Yuan is with Qian right now, right? I honestly can’t wait to see her lose it on San Pang and him begging for mercy and forgiveness. Is it weird that I want to see him on his knees as he begs? I wouldn’t mind him crawling either…
I get Qian’s fear of going to the hospital and perhaps never coming out again. BUT! If Yuan and Lili knew the truth, they could prepare themselves for the possibility that Qian might not make it. Qian just dropping dead isn’t going to help anyone, though. And how would they feel if they found out about his condition after that? And finding out that he knew about it?
I wonder how Qian would feel if their roles were reversed. As in, if he found out either Yuan or Lili (the two people who are most important to him) had kept something like this from him.
Am I the only one who loves that Yuan is avoiding Qian? Because I fucking LOVE IT! And he ignored Qian even though Qian had made Yuan’s favorite dishes. This is my shit! (I know, I need help…)
Oooh, Yuan is both bold and bossy in this episode. I didn’t know I could love him any more than I already do. I was wrong.
Is it weird that I’m excited to see the confrontation I know is coming within the next 10-ish minutes?
San Pang is saying all the right things and asking all the right questions. Now it’s up to Qian to figure it out on his own (perhaps with a bit of help from Yuan).
Qian getting emotional is making me emotional. What is this series doing to me?
San Pang: ”Do you want him to have a future without you?” My eyes are leaking again! What the fuck is this series doing to me?
I stopped mid-confrontation because Yuan’s calmness was killing me. But, also, some of the things Qian has said so far gave me the feeling that his approach to figuring out if his feelings for Yuan are brotherly love or something more is more about thinking/reflecting on it rather than feeling it. In my experience, thinking isn’t the best way to gain clarity when it comes to emotions. Clarity comes from feeling and experiencing the emotions. So, just shut up and kiss already… Perhaps it’s time for Yuan to give Qian a little nudge in the right direction, even though he’s been so cautious not to cross the line since he came back home.
Qian: ”All I know is I can’t live without you.” The fact that he’s admitting that, out loud, to Yuan… We’re making some progress.
Seriously, Yuan’s calmness is killing me. He still thinks it’s his problem that he fell for Qian. He still thinks it’s his shit to handle. He still doesn’t want to put that on Qian. Being calm is almost like his armor.
I fucking knew they would cut pre-kiss! That’s just mean.
This episode was great! I loved that Yuan finally found out the truth. I loved that he ignored Qian (again, it’s a me-thing). I loved all the emotions. Seriously, the amount of time I spent crying… I just realized it took me just a little less than 2 hours to watch this 30-ish minute episode…
What is this series doing to me?
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I finished the second episode of Heartstopper last night (wanted to post about it yesterday, but I was too tired from work), so here are some of my thoughts in no particular order for you now.
Good on Nick for checking up on Charlie after what happened. I found it odd, though, that he seemed more emotional about it than Charlie, but I guess they're in two very different places, mentally. One being 'why do I seem to like this guy way more than my other friends?' & the other being 'omg stop being so nice to me, your straight!' lol. Plus, I get that everyone deals with stuff in their own way & poor Charlie is probably so used to being mistreated that he might just be repressing the full weight of how his feeling as a copeing mechanism. It was also probably very cathartic to finally tell someone everything that happened between him & Ben (as I'm guessing he kept most if not all of it a secret from his friends & sister).
WE FINALLY MEET NELLIE!!!! And she is as cute as I'd hoped (though for some reason I expected her to be a different colour).
Sorry, Charlie, but Tori's right. Your hair looks exactly the same. Also, love that they kept the gag from the novel about her scaring him with her, always showing up suddenly without warning.
Nice to see that the outfits are on point for our boys so far with the plaid/black jeans (trying to impress someone, I see Charlie) & T-shirt/joggers (also what product is Miss Nelson using coz Nick's tops look soft as hell).
Wait, what season is it supposed to be because it looked really sunny when Charlie was walking to Nick's house (I know he was wearing a coat & hat but Charlie is always cold) but then suddenly it's snowing? Idk when Alice first came up with this story, but as a Brit, I haven't seen proper full on Snow since I was probably around eight years old. But hey, maybe in the Heartstopper universe, global warming doesn't exist.
I don’t care what anyone says, I will never get the fun of a snowball fight. If I go somewhere with a friend & they start throwing stuff at me, I'm leaving! Also, picking it up with your bare hands? One, it's been on the ground 🤢, and two, where are your gloves? Do you not feel the cold? Snow angles do look fun until I think about how my entire behind would be frozen/damp. Sorry if that makes me a "stick in the mud", I don't care 😝.
Damn, that is one photogenic dog & and aww, they already look like a couple. Also, give it up for Nick's freckles, the real star of the show 👏.
Omg, being in the same group as someone you hate must be so hard, but I get why Nick can't really say anything about what Ben did, at least not right now. Also, what is up with that Imogen girl? Mind your damn business.
I think it's good we get to see Elle longing for a bond with other girls that she just can't get from her male friend group. Makes her transition feel more fleshed out (for lack of a better word), you know?
Yay, we finally meet Tara & Darcy & they're exactly how I thought they'd be (except I imagined Darcy with brown hair for some reason). Ooh I didn't know Elle was artistic. I wanna decorate pencil cases now. Tara's pink puffa coat is so cute. What is up with adults dictating how long kids' hair can be? Like who gives a fuck! Also "gal pals" had me 😆.
Oh, thank god, it's just misinformation. For a second, I thought Tao was making shit up just to make Charlie get over his crush. Are kids really like that, though? I can't imagine kissing someone once & having people insist, I'm madly in love with them to this day, like move on already.
Ok, I officially really like the gay teacher, lol.
Love Charlie's sweater & Nick's coats are also very nice. Where are these kids getting their clothes? Coz I'm embarrassed by most of the stuff I wore as a teenager.
The big hoodie moment should be cute, but I just can't help thinking about how skinny Charlie is, which makes me ☹️.
Ok, so I didn't care much for the leaf animation in the first episode, but omg, the little fire crackles when Nick was trying to hold Charlie's hand? Screaming, crying, throwing up!!!!!!! & the hug before he left? Fucking crops watered for life, bitch!
Was digging Elle's outfit, very 70's vibes.
Ah, so their "secret" is out. Also obligatory: 🗣 LET'S GO LESBIANS LET'S GO 🗣
Can't wait for the next episode, but I practically passed out after watching episode 2 (manual labour is hard, kids 😭), so maybe I hallucinated, but did that Imogen girl ask Nick out? I thought she was daiting Ben? Or is that a different girl?
PS. I found out Aled won't be in the show, which I accept & the only reason I haven't talked about Isaac is because he hasn't really done much yet
#heartstopper#heartstopper season 1#heartstopper episode 2#nick nelson#charlie spring#ben hope#tori spring#nellie nelson#imogen heaney#elle argent#tara jones#darcy olsson#tao xu#heartstopper netflix#heartstopper season 1 episode 2#lgbtq+#lgbtq+ media#lgbtq+ characters#trans character#trans female character#lesbian characters#gay character#queer media#queer characters#sapphic relationship#sapphic characters#sapphic#narlie#trans
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ARCANE SEASON 2 SPOILERS!!
.
I have a lot to say.
1) Oh my gosh, I did NOT expect Sky to hahnt the narrative like this. I'm so happy they're using her for this, I was getting bored of people saying she was a wasted character when it was obvious they were setting up something. I also wanna add (which is a little bit of a tangent but wtv) that this, to me does not confirm that Viktor had a romantic interest for Sky necessarily, but to me it shows that he did CARE about her a lot. I was getting a little upset at discussions saying that Viktor simply never cared for Sky and she only mattered when she died, since it made Viktor realize his effects on other people. She had way more of an impact on him than this (obviously, they've known each other since childhood). I don't believe he ever saw her romantically tho. Probably just go a lot more attached upon reading the confession she had written for him. Nevertheless, I am sooooo enjoying this sort of messiah persona their giving him (it lines up well with what we know of him in the games).
2) A part of me is a little sad that a Mel wasn't the one who died. Not because I hate her character, in fact, I find her to be very interesting (The stuff with her mom is ALWAYS so visceral to me???). I just think that it would have had a lot more of an impact on Jayce and probably given her mom more of a reason to be here. It also would have given the start of the season more emotional weight. Sure, I'm sad that Caitlin's mom died and I'm happy this is being used as a drive for her, but it just didn't hit me as hard as it could have. I have some thoughts on it is all.
3) Does anybody else find it kind of jarring how many musical moments there are? It's not that I dislike them or anything, but I liked that there were less of them in the first season so it felt fresh and unique to the scenes when there were. In the first episodes, I can already count like a good 3-4 of them. Just thought it was a strange decision.
4) Gosh, I am loving some of the new character's and their designs. I hope we see more of them. They look really good. In general, the show is just as, if not MORE aesthetically pleasing than in season 1. Everybody and everything just looks really nice and I'm happy that's something that wasn't slept on.
5) I really like the Sevika/Jinx alliance! OH, THAT AND THE LITTLE KID! I love the idea of putting Jinx in a sort of protector role after having every older figure in her life promise to keep her safe just to fail at it. At first, I thought it might not fit her, but I think it's a good decision.
6) Jayce and Viktor breakup part 2... Omfg, these two. THE HUG SCENE. IT'S SO... INTIMATE. The way Viktor was caressing Jayce's back, it's like the other was precious. I felt like I was interrupting something like HELLO??? "It was affection that held us together."
...IT WAS AFFECTION THAT HELD US TOGETHER. SAY FUCKING SIKE RN. I DID NOT WAIT THIS LONG FOR YOU TOO TO TENDERLY EMBRACE AGAIN JUST FOR YOU TO THROW THIS SHIT AT ME. OML. They make me sick. They make me ILL.
7) Vi is having the police effect rn (The oppressed becomes the oppressor). It was to be expected since yk, the games, but like I hate seeing it in real time. I hate seeing how little fights for it not to happen.
8) The Vi x Caitlyn stuff is real cute, but I'd be lying if I said I found the Caitlyn stuff to be very interesting at the start... I'm sorry, but we have so many things to deal with rn, how are we spending this much time over the poor girl's dead mother. It was just uninteresting to me, but it was a vehicle for the fun stuff to start, so I can't really be mad.
9) Seeing how the underground functions now that Silko is dead has been a lingering question of mine for a while and I'm happy that it was answered!
10) I was so worried the second intro wouldn't be as good and was even kinda wondering if they would just go for the same one, but I LOVE the vibes and tones set for the second! It doesn't beat the first, since that's almost an impossible task, but it's a fun treat and I am also not skipping that one when I watch an episode from now on.
11) And of course, the most important thing; EKKO LOOKS SO FUCKING FINE UGHHHHH HE FINALLY GETS MORE SCREEN TIMEEEEE!!!

LORD, HAVE MERCY.
Oh, and the Heimerdinger stuff with him is also cool ig.
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Lore Post//
Mafuyu picks up Tsukasa from his house by her car and they drive to her home. On the way, Mafuyu wanted to have small talk with Tsukasa. However, he WAS going through a rough time. And since he was sitting in the back seat, Mafuyu thought that this would be a great moment for him to finally cope a bit in silence. It always helped her calm down when she was feeling bad, she believed it would be the same for Tsukasa. When they arrived, Mafuyu got out and opened the door for Tsukasa, holding her hand out for him. It was the same as a prince helping a princess get down.
Oh..! Uhm...thank you...
Tsukasa awkwardly took her hand and got out. Mafuyu unlocks the front door and they both enter the house. Tsukasa was almost immediately greeted by Mafuyu's mother.
"Ah, Tenma-san! Right, Mafuyu did talk about you coming over. Please, make yourself comfortable. If you'd like, I can make tea for the both of you!"
It's nice to meet you too Ms. Asahina...
Thanks mom! Tea would be nice, it helps with bad emotions!
"Right. I'll make it, you two go have fun!"
T-Thank you...
They go in Mafuyu's room.
Don't mind my mom. She's only like that when a guest arrives.
Really? Is she the opposite when you two are alone?
Mhm.
Oh...I'm sorry to hear that...
...No wait...
Hm?
I'm sorry...I invited you to make you feel better, not to make you feel worse by gushing about my problems.
Oh it's fine...I need something to take my mind off of things anyway...
I know but...I'm just worried about you. You're acting like high school me.
Ugh...high school...what a hell it was...
Yeah. I don't think anyone liked their high school time.
Hehe...hnm...
Maybe I triggered something? Saki-san did mention his trauma in high school to me...Ugh...I shouldn't have said that.
You have...lots of bunnies in your room...
Oh, yes. They're my favorite animal! What about yours?
Uhm...I like dogs...but cats are pretty cute too. And birds are so interesting. Though if we're talking about any animal it has to be any sea animal! Their living style is so interesting and it's so much fun to look up and research about them!
Mafuyu listens intently to Tsukasa's words. Tsukasa is talking about things he enjoys other than dealing with Ena's death. This was a good step. Mafuyu couldn't mess it up now.
Which sea animal do you like researching the most?
For underwater, it's either sharks or jellyfish! For above it's otters and platypuses! Did you know jellyfishes don't have a heart, brain or anything else but can still live? Oh! Oh oh!! And then there's these tardigrads and oh god they are fascinating!! Their other name is "Sea bears"! They can live in extreme weather! Without oxygen! And it's so interesting!!!
How did this conversation go from bunnies to sea bears that can live without oxygen?
No clue!
Mafuyu's mom knocks and opens the door.
"Hey kids...I made you two tea."
Thanks mom! I'll take that from you.
Mafuyu takes the tea set from her mother. After that, her mother leaves. Mafuyu touches one of the cups before taking the other one. Tsukasa raises the other cup and takes a sip. He immediately drops the cup on himself because he burned his tongue, and ends up burning himself again. Idiot.
GAH-!! Hng-!
Oh god. I'll get some napkins.
Mafuyu leaves to get napkins. While she does. She glances at her mother, which she notices.
"Is something wrong dear?"
You made the tea hotter for one of the cups. I'm not stupid.
"Oh but why would I ever do that? You're simply overreacting."
Hey. Remember why dad divorced with you? It's because you're a piece of shit that makes sure when you're in a bad situation, you make someone's already bad situation to hell. Learn to suck it up you bitch ass cunt.
"..."
With that, Mafuyu goes back to her room and gives Tsukasa some napkins.
Oh...thank you...
You're welcome...
B-But you didn't have to do this...
I just want to make sure you're okay.
Huh...?
Sigh...Saki told me about your state and I can't lie that I became worried...a lot for you.
...!
Because...We all have different ways of coping, but I want to make sure yours is a safe one.
Asahina-san...
Please....just call me by Mafuyu...
Mafuyu...Mafuyu...
Hm?
Sniff...sniff...I uhm...can I get a hug...? I'm just...
No need to explain. Of course.
Mafuyu hugged Tsukasa tightly. Tsukasa gripped on her very tight. She wants to...make sure he's coping in a safe way? That's too much. You could never hear that from anyone. Not even your parents. And Mafuyu just said it like that. Even with Saki, he wanted to stay strong. He didn't want her too see him as vulnerable as a lost kitten. But it felt like Mafuyu broke a limit. Like...she knew his life and knew the right things to do. He was so greatful to have her. He cried like never before. Mafuyu sensed different types as he cried. A lost kid's cry. A cry of a middle schooler who failed a test. A cry of a collage students who couldn't get accepted. The cry of a girl who broke up with her lover. The cry of a boy who broke up his lover. The cry of a mom who lost her baby. The cry of a man who lost her wife. The cry of a dog who witnessed it's puppies getting taken away. The cry of a cat who saw it's kittens die before it. All the cries in the world...yet his cries hurt Mafuyu deep. She didn't want to let go. So she didn't.
Tags: @aspenii @bobcross1010 @blankblyke @delartz @kusanagi-nene-official-mod @t4m4r1 @kiwi-does-stuff @mai-mai-mai @mizuribbons @scodscod
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(( so i've decided to repost the Freaky Friday fic here on the blog, to have one other place to read it besides just ao3. here we go! ))
HLVRFF: Chapter 1
It all happened so fast, Benry didn't even detect what was going on until after the fact. And by then, it was too late for him to do anything about it.
Being an eldritch horror from the cosmic void, Benrey had a lot of real fun abilities at his disposal. One of those being the ability to 'astral project' as he'd heard humans call it. He never really used this one too much, though. Until he moved in with Gordon, that is. He'd found that slipping out of his own body to go hang out in Gordon's dreams was a pretty sick way to pass the time at night, when nothing else was keeping his attention successfully. Or when he was feeling lonely. Being the only one in your friend group who doesn't need to sleep at night kind of sucks sometimes.
Gordon was… a little unnerved by the brain-intrusions at first. But he never told Benry to fuck off with that shit, as the night time chats with the entity were much, MUCH preferred over all his PTSD night terrors. Dreams never kicked in right whenever Benry was there, including the bad ones, so it was a win-win situation, really. However, if a dream was already in the middle of happening when Benry jumped in, the dream didn't just automatically stop.
He never thought much about it until tonight.
Benry wasn't really feeling in the mood for any video games, so he decided he'd go see what ol' Feetman was up to in dream land. He got himself laid out nice and comfy in his bed, slipped out of his body and into Gordon's.
And soon came to very much regret it.
Gordon was having a nightmare about Xen, looked like. From his vantage point, he could see the man fleeing for his life from something. He didn't see what, but whatever it was, it had the poor guy scared absolutely shitless. Benry could feel all the horrible emotions Gordon was having while sharing a headspace with him, and yeah, no, this was not cool. He needed to calm Gordon down, show him he was just dreaming. If he could get him in a more lucid state, the nightmare would be easy to knock away.
Dream-Xen wasn't set up the same way as the real deal was- but thankfully Benry was able to just clip through everything just like the real one, which allowed him to cut Gordon off as the human frantically made his way through the winding tunnels.
When Gordon rounded the corner and came face to face with Benry, the human let out a strained shriek, and looked like he was about to book it back towards whatever he was fleeing from before. Whu..? Oh, shit, right. Benry was playing the bad guy when they were all on Xen, so of course Gordon wouldn't be very happy to see him, even if he wasn't at the same giant size he was back then.
…Wait.
Benry was the main threat to Gordon and the Science Team when they were on Xen.
So… did that mean…
As if to answer Benry's unspoken question, a massive, pale hand came phasing through the roof of the cave, one of its sharp black talons nearly impaling Gordon as it did. Gordon fell to the cave floor and looked on in horror as the monstrous owner of the hand brought their face into view.
Gordon wasn't having a nightmare about Xen. He was having a nightmare about Benry.
The alien's heart dropped like a fucking rock at the realization. Dream-Benry raised his fist, looking like he was getting ready to crush Gordon, and that's when real-Benry shoved down the sanguine and shadow building up in his throat and dove towards the human. He grabbed Gordon, and then sunk them both down into the floor, escaping into another chamber. Gordon thrashed in his grip, desperate to get away, but Benry held firm, and flipped the man around to face him.
"dude, dude, you gotta- you gotta calm down. that thing- that's not me, you're dreaming-" Benry tried to explain, but Gordon wasn't fucking listening, he just kept screaming at him to let go and get away and-
They were both silenced when the sole of a giant combat boot came down hard directly on top of them.
------------
Benry's whole form jolts as he returns to a more corporeal state of being. God, fuck. Dying was never fun, even in dreams. He lets out a heavy sigh and blinks- wait. His eyes are open? Why is it so fuckin' dark, then? He looks around the room, and does see… a faint light, shining in the corner of the room. Focusing on that light, his eyes begin to adjust a bit more to the dark. It's then he realizes that everything is blurry? He moves to push himself up into a sitting position- oh holy fuck he feels so tired and heavy and weak. What the shit. He brings a hand up to his head to rub at his eyes… and finds that his cheeks are a lot less bony than he remembers. Benry blindly gropes at his face some more, and feels what is very clearly a scruffy beard that he very much did not have before.
"yo what-" he says aloud, cutting himself off instantly when he hears himself speaking with Gordon's voice.
That's… new.
And would explain why he can't see shit all. Benry carefully feels over for where he knows Gordon's bedside nightstand is, and turns on the lamp once he finds the switch, to back up the little light from what he now realizes is Gordon's night light. Okay okay, no longer dark, but still blurry as hell. Squinting at the nightstand, he makes out the general shape of Gordon's glasses, and gingerly picks them up and places them on his face. Ah, there we go, blessed with sight once again. Albeit still pretty fucking shitty sight. This isn't how Gordon's eyes are ALL the time, is it? No, no, can't be. That'd be messed up. His sight, and all of his other senses come to think, are probably just all discombobulated from being forced into the wrong body. Yeah. Totally. He just needs to give it a minute.
Suddenly, a scream rings out in the house, in a voice that Benry recognizes as his own.
Oh shit, Gordon.
Welp, 'giving it a minute' is now officially off the table.
Benry quickly hops out of bed (ignoring the foreign ache in his-Gordon's? legs) and bolts towards the door. It's here that he makes yet another discovery.
His usual powers didn't carry over with him into Gordon's body, apparently, as when he tries to clip through the door because it's faster than opening it, he just fuckin' slams right into the damn thing. He groans, both in pain (so much pain…) and embarrassment, before opening the door like a normal human person and books it down the hall to his bedroom.
Flinging the door open and flicking on the light switch, he's met with a very concerning sight.
------------
Gordon lurches up into a sitting position, reflexively throwing his arms up, as if to hold off the massive boot that was trying to squash him like a bug. It was just a dream, he thinks as he realizes that he's not dead or on Xen. Doesn't do anything to calm his residual panic, though. His heart is still going a mile a minute and… and that's not right. His heart isn't beating right.
His brain finally catches up with the rest of him, and he realizes that he's in an entirely different room than he was when he went to sleep. It's Benry's room from the looks of it, but… it's not right, either. Why is the lighting so weird. The light's not even on, but he can see, he can see SO clearly and- the colours. They're all so much more vibrant, and there's ones he doesn't even recognize. He can't even think how to DESCRIBE them, what the fuck.
Ignore that for right now, Gordon, you gotta calm down, he thinks to himself. Closing his eyes, he reaches a hand up to run his fingers through his hair. Doing such has often helped him ground himself during anxiety and panic. But instead of feeling his long, soft hair, he feels a knit beanie. He does not wear knit beanies. His roommate wears knit beanies. His roommate whose room he inexplicably woke up in just now.
Gordon's eyes snap open and he looks at his hands.
They are not his hands.
"What the fuck," he utters, barely above a whisper, in what is definitely Benry's voice.
No. No? No. No! This isn't happening. This is NOT fucking HAPPENING. He's still dreaming, CLEARLY he's still dreaming! He just needs to wake up. C'mon, Gordon, you can do it. Wake up. Wake up, Gordon. Wake UP, Gordon. WAKE UP, GORDON-
A scream rips out of his throat, as he feels something else in his borrowed body rip.
#half life vr but the ai is self aware#half life vr but it's freaky friday#hlvrai#hlvrai fic#benry#benrey#gordon feetman#body swap#fic repost
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normal anon here to talk about faust for no reason. this was meant to be general bus stuff but like. im the #1 faust enjoyer ever. i need that stoic woman to piss her pants too.
wait noo whose ordering the sinners all their pull-ups 😭
either dante knows whose wearing pull-ups when (less embarrassing) or FAUST knows (i mean she knows anyway but YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN)
do they just like. STOCKPILE diapers/pull-ups for all the littles???? imagine its mail day and faust just is like "ah, don quixote. here is your package of red mist pull-ups. heathcliff, here are your pull-ups. sinclair--" (she gets cut off by dante whose realizing this is a disaster.)
idk i hc faust as also a regressor tho so maybe shes more understanding and tries to be subtle. gets embarrassed if someone retaliates against her by pointing out the packages of her diapers (sometimes she gets distracted in her studies, ok, its totally normal to piss yourself when researching!! dont ask her if shes feeling little after that because like. 50/50 chance that she just isnt. its convenient to piss yourself sometimes. multiple times. in one sitting.)
as much as ishmael probably is also a regressor (i think the whole bus can regress, as a treat) she tends towards "playing" cg for heathcliff + don/sancho. yi sang is fausts cg.
so ishy and yi sang are like "MY little is autistic and YOUR little is autistic so maybe they would have fun with a playdate." and ishmaels like "well... don wont go anywhere without heathcliff" and yi sang is. hesitant because heathcliff and faust are like polar opposites. reluctantly agrees because ishmael promises he'll behave well.
on the night of the playdate, don's absolutely little, and both heathcliff and faust are in slightly less little headspaces. they're all in don's room because that place is absolutely the most little friendly.
at some point during the playdate, don gets all squirmy, then freezes, and then continues like nothing happened. its clear she just used her pull-up and. faust just kinda makes a face at that. its not even really intentional on her part (this woman does NOT emote shes behind 3 limbillion masks so no one can EVER get the drop on her but... shes little-ish right now and yi sang promised that this would be good for her so she's... only got like 5 masks up right now.) (yi sang asks faust it later and she shuffles her feet and apologizes to don because don peeing made her think about how she also isn't the best at holding it (even when big, nowadays) and she really was making that face at herself! don just giggles and is like "its ok ^-^". maybe even offers to be potty training buddies which faust immediately rejects but it seems like that was don's plan all along because now they're back to normal)
don notices faust making a face first and reacts by like. embarrassedly hiding behind heathcliff and sniffling. heathcliff sees the fact that faust's "bullying" his little sister and he has to step in even if it'd make ishmael cross with him because right now his little sister is more important!!!
and. maybe heathcliff is a little bit mean when he points out that yeah, don did wet her pull-up, but what does that make faust who wears diapers. faust denies and deflects because what else are you supposed to do in that situation. she wears a skirt when little because its easier for yi sang to deal with instead of her normal jeans so shes wearing a skirt now. so faust is like "faust does not wear diapers." and heathcliff is like "yeah you do" and like. flips her skirt up and is like "see?" which causes don to giggle. faust freezes & panic pees. (why is that one of the panic responses though.)
heathcliff gets an "oh shit" look on his face. faust's fully dropped little & is starting to cry. he knows he can't leave to go get ishmael or yi sang (he doesn't want to be in trouble but also because he doesnt wanna leave his little sisters alone when one is crying. (i think he very quickly adopts faust as a little sister when shes little when she lets him. makes him feel strong or something ^-^)
quickly has to go into damage control. bites the bullet and is all like "its ok, its ok, we're all wearing padding, see?" and pulls the waistband of his pants so she can see his pull-up and that makes her sniffle and look at him with the widest eyes hes ever seen from faust and. it makes her look so small when she does that. he's already shown her that ishmael doesn't trust to keep him unpadded so he pulls faust into his lap and starts telling her about times he's wet himself. and faust giggles now and then which is just about the cutest thing in the world. don chimes in with her own stories about straight up not being potty trained and faust stares at her with wide eyes and (though she completely denies it later because fuck. she did NOT mean to say that. dont even THINK about what it'd imply or she will. die on the spot.) she kinda just whispers "that's allowed!?"
eventually they all fall asleep cuddling and ishmael and yi sang pop in and are like "awww so cute!!"
idk i think the whole bus deserves to piss their pants when its their time. pissbus company even LMAO. they put the golden in golden bough if you get what i mean. ok ill stop these arent funny aSFJDFJOIAJDS
I LOVE FAUST YOU ARE SO RIGHT SHE NEEDS TO PISS HER PANTS.
every time i read stuff about regressing sinners i just realize: wow these people understand the characters at a deeper level than most of the fandom! im taking notes and nodding sagely. im learning things. my eyes are open. ESPECIALLY when they match my own opinions its like yeah based.
i may have done too much worldbuilding of my own about who orders pull-ups and i think each sinner handled it on their own until faust or dante realized 'theres a lot of devayt deliveries...' and then noticed theyre all from like the same company and in order to save money they started to get a bulk order. i think faust does keep a stockpile also but none of them were cute and this became a problem when Don ran out. (Vergilius helping her move stuff from the Lighthouse and there were a lot of pull-ups from Bari and he just sighs.) Hong Lu I think was who helped Don really early on because he's very smart and he also wears pull-ups and offered to add her to his subscription until Dante went 'why dont we just... merge all the orders...'
but YES I AGREE. Faust in diapers and Yi Sang caretaker... she doesn't get that little very much but. look she has the teddy bear ego that is THE regression ego. (a discord im in was talking about how rodya hates it but she does regress too but Sinclair actually regresses to an OLDER little age than usual due to the ego and so hes actually older than Rodya and Faust with it which is so sososo cute the only time he can be older) ANYWAY Faust does regress but also its kind of scary for her because also messes with the connection to the Gesellschaft in different ways i think so she tries not to. but she needs extra attention when she DOES get little because of it.
UGH little heathcliff is so much to me. the really nice and good family life he never had... hes soooooo protective of his little sister... he's accidentally called don cathy when little but then he also gets soft for faust too.... he wants to be a good big brother so bad!!!!!!! even when its hard!!
I LOVE THEM YEAH SAME THEY SHOULD ALL PISS THEIR PANTS PLEASE.
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finally had a good, fun invasion experience in dark souls 2. and then a bonus, kinda okay one!
i kinda fell off the game a few weeks ago (around when Satisfactory 1.0 hit, strangely enough) and haven't been playing it much. Satisfactory is starting to make me want to pull my hair out, though, so i thought, all the hard shit at the end of DS2 will be a welcome, relaxing reprieve! ho ho ho!
so i'm creeping through the Crown of the Sunken King DLC. Shulva, Sanctum City. it's the bit with all the towers you have to raise and lower. I'm Human, so I've been expecting an invasion sooner or later, and i prepare in advance by bringing my #1 surefure PVP secret weapon: Chameleon. The spell that disguises you as a prop of some kind. (My other spells include Great Heavy Soul Arrow, Soul Spear, and Crystal Homing Soulmass (remember that last one! It's a surprise tool that will help us later))
so anyway, i get the alert that an invasion is happening. (it's from a mod that provides anti-hacker protection, and it's set up so that when someone connects suddenly, i get an alert. in this case, a .wav of a cow mooing.) and i think... fuck it, let's have fun. i'm feeling emboldened and i still have a decent amount of resources. so i pop chameleon and wait! form of... big crumbly clay jar. hmm, okay.
it seems painfully obvious to me that this jar does not blend in, so i just park myself right in the middle of an open area. like. just squarely in the road. and i wait for the invader (his name is "Stinky Pete") to just happen by. soon, he does! running up the stairs into view, just over yonder! and now he's running this way! is he going to emote at me? wave? just start attacking? hee hee hee, I'm so excited to find out~!
and he runs right past me. doesn't slow down for a moment. literally clips his leg through my magic jug disguise and keeps going until he disappears into a nearby tower. oh my god. that worked? i don't think he knows this area very well.
do i pursue? do i follow? eh, playing hide and seek doesn't seem like as much fun as playing this straight. so I look around until i see him observing from above, on a perch above my position. makes sense, he went to highground to scout the road below. the one i'm in. so i spin the jug around and around and just run in circles. "look at me! down here! what fun we've had, but you overlooked your quarry here~!" and shit. He waves. I break disguise and wait for him as he runs down.
so he's back and he approaches, and I do the "welcome!" gesture as he draws close. he "welcome!"s back.
okay! duel time. i'm gonna try to kill this dude but i don't think it'll happen!
we play footsies for a bit, during which he grazes me with a twinblade that deals some kind of poison damage... and that's it. barely a bit of my health bar is damaged and, since i'm in Poison Suck Toxic Town, i'm wearing a poison soaking ring anyway, so even his weapon poison doesn't really bother me much. so, okay. that's not too threatening. maybe he has some other trick up his sleeve?
more footsies ensue. i try to blast him with a Soul Spear and he dodges it without issue. okay, let's mix it up, make some space, and get Homing Crystal Soulmass ready, see how that works. alright, those are up, all five shots ready to go, powered up by my 50-int boss-murdering magic build, aaaaand... let's try fencing for a bit, and... oh boy! there go the Soulmasses!
they hit, and knocked that dude down to like 35% of his health. Just absolutely blew his shit wide open. i was pogging.
and then blood was in the water and i got hungry. he dodged a second burst but i kept up the aggression and didn't give him a chance to turn that shit around for a moment. the third HCS blew him up real good. dude went spiralling off into the distance like Team Rocket. i bowed politely, my clothes immaculate.
i have never survived an invasion in these games, i haven't seen a whole lot of them, admittedly, so this was a good feeling. even if the guy seemed incredibly outgunned! i mean, his weapon wasn't doing much for me, he didn't really outmaneuver me (and thereby get any backstabbing opportunities), he took a lot of damage from my spell-and it's very possible he just got unlucky and invaded well above his level. so i'm not under the impression that i outplayed some absolute predator and, therefore, i am now an even bigger, meaner predator. this felt more like a couple of squirrels having a slapfight in a tree or something.
but not only did i get to win, i got to fool someone with the best spell in the game AND have a nice friendly duel afterwards. what a dude! Stinky Pete's the best, I tell you. the man's an absolute ledge.
i went back to my adventuring through the area. two minutes later i botched a fairly easy jump and fell to my death.
the end, that's the story. the following is bonus content:
so now i'm Hollow and probably won't be invaded. probably. i should have protection from that for a little while anyway. i guess it expired, though, since some 20 minutes of bumbling around later (have i mentioned how i really don't like the moving towers in Sanctuary City Shulva?), i get another alert. Moo! here comes an invader! i'm literally in the same area that i was when Stinky Pete invaded, so i think, let's just try it all again.
this time, Chameleon makes me look like an open treasure chest. okay, that doesn't look like it fits AT ALL. so let's just get silly with it. i'll creep up on the invader like this.
and here he comes now! his name is "Ray" and he has a Greatsword of some kind. oh ho ho, here I come, Ray~! the big scary treasure chest is gonna getcha! whatcha gonna do-
well, he attacks, is what he does. so i scoot away for a bit and give him a second chance to either play along or at least stop and wave. he doesn't, he just attacks again.
alright, fuck this. drop the disguise and try to kill him. i beat him around for a bit and heal whenever i want (no bow? no fair duel rules). he eventually runs off and heals up himself, then comes back, and i kill him.
and that was also very satisfying, but not in the way the first one was. it was a sloppy fight that i didn't play very well. the win didn't feel especially earned. but this was like fending off a mangy coyote instead of playfully tussling with a squirrel so i'm at least a little proud.
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hiya dio!! tossing in 3 (honkai star rail? 👀), 5, and 15!!
hiya ian! thanks for shooting me an ask!!
3.) Go to the [honkai star rail] tag and reblog some art you like that has under 100 notes
aight i gotchu oomfie, ill search for stuff to queue up 😤😤
5.) What genre do you like reading the best?
angst and hurt/comfort 🔛🔝!!!
it's painful, it's good, and it makes emotional processing so much easier and less burdensome because the difficulty goes into finding an okay sentence and stringing together ok-ish dialogue (but at least those can be solved with a banger ass playlist, ykw?)
augh special mention to one of my formative twst fics i love that grim has such a big role in this
15.) Worst fanfic tropes ever?
NOO!!!! U CANT MAKE ME SAY BAD THINGS ABT FANFIC!!! ALL FANFIC IS GOOD WHEN IT IS MADE WITH HEART!!!
(did i say bridal carry? ill just say it again for funsies HAHAHA i dont like bridal carries, it doesn't spark any joy, please just carry me like this🤧👇👇)

i'm usually really open-minded with reading fanfics... so aside from the obvious fanfic writing sins (using generative AI, plagiarism, not doing enough careful research for sensitive topics) OH WAIT--
(this is probably specific to genshin/hyv) but i Reaaaaally don't like it when fandom infantilizes characters that use the teenage model. like, there is such a thing as short adults! (me. i am one of them!) one time i saw someone say that lynette was probably a year younger than lyney and i was confused bcs aren't they twins??? like, are we forgetting that lynette was the primary "errand-goer" for the house of hearth upon getting her vision? girlie's probably seen more shit than lyney did.
^^semi-related to infantilizing characters, i dont like how some obm fics treat luke as a literal toddler. like, yes he's immature but he's got a good head on his shoulders and even if he's a low-ranked angel he probably has sm powers that he can make use of to protect MC. and i esp see how he gets left out even in gen/platonic fics and hcs. smtimes i feel compelled to look at the game's shitty pop quiz events for fanfic fuel (i mean, the luke tag has more ppl saying not to sexualize him than actual writing and that bugs me ://)
There used to be this really good obm fanfic (Nightmare by StarsEncrusted) and it had a plot point of helping luke get his wings, but it++the author's orig account got deleted from ao3. thankfully some fans had the foresight to archive it, so heres a wayback link to the fic and the accompanying side stories
i guess to expound more on my aversion to marriage in fanfic, it icks me when the characterization stops feeling like the characters themselves and the fic starts feeling heteronormative (also sometimes the writing comes across as if the marriage/childbirth "fixes" all those issues, which, it doesn't) and, well, i already kind of deal with the idea of "getting settled down" shoved in my face. it's really not for me. but i do understand why it's comforting to people, smtimes i can indulge in reading in it. but on a bad day, nah, i can't.
anyway, also special shout out to chat fics, they can be fun but idk it reads to me as a way to regurgitate overused incorrect quotes. (please some vines need to be laid to rest. also, can we stop quoting that one copaganda show oh my god)
(art appreciation ask questions, please bug me to rb some underrated fic and art)
#dellet-asks#mga chismoso kayo!!!!! (/j)#im alr wracking my brain on how to word what i dont like in fanfic sdfkjsldfjs without being nitpicky bcs writing hard#smtimes fanfic discourse is a subtle way of dissing writers who dont have english as their first language js#i have specific characterizations that muddle canon and fanon and itll probably piss off people on both sides#idk but if it makes the fic more interesting ill go for it (if i have the spoons for it)#also just as a disclaimer i like most incorrect quotes. just not the ones from b-(nasagasaan)#scint1llat3
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Heart of the Weave - chapter 39 - Fanden’s POV
[Emmy’s evil half-brother Fanden is introduced]
My name is Fanden, a former human who grew up not having much of a childhood. I had a mother who was an escort and worked at Sharess Caress in Rivington during the week while I stayed with a sitter most of the time, and my father…well, he’s a tyrant who hungers for power, control, and working people to the bone. One night he slept with my mother to ease his mind, which was rampant from stress and his eagerness to get shit done. I saw my mother for only one hour a day as a kid, and the most fun I ever had was when my sitter took me to the playground every day. Occasionally, we went to the beach, but it didn’t feel right not having my mom there. I wonder who she would’ve been today. I wonder if I’d be so corrupted if she was alive.
My father was mostly out of my life, because my mother never told him she was pregnant with me. He didn’t want to have sex with anyone else but her when he went to Sharess Caress, and when he realized she stopped going, he felt the need to search for answers, like where she went and if she was even still alive. She left the city and hid for as long as she could, taking me with her and promised me a new life.
“We won’t live in these sewers for long,” she told me. Her voice was broken, her eyes drenched with salty tears. When I was around ten years old, she was murdered by Orin and her body was given up to the altar of Bhaal, right before Orin became his chosen. Gortash didn’t know of this for a while. I don’t quite remember how he found out or if he even knows Orin was responsible.
I wanted to forget every single horrible instance I’ve endured. I sold my soul to the devil Mephistopheles to replace the horrid sadness I couldn’t escape from. I told the devil that I’d rather feel any other terrible emotion than the painful heartbreak that I just couldn’t handle any longer. He couldn’t promise me happiness, but he could promise me a new life. I accepted and couldn’t wait for the heartache to leave my body. The moment my soul was sold, I became a grey-skinned tiefling with crimson eyes, beyond recognition of who I once was. This happened seventeen years after my mom’s death, and I found a new way to live: bloodthirsty for murder.
As a kid, I managed to survive on my own, though it was hard. Hiding in shadows, scrounging off food from the trash, hunting animals…and dealing with the sorrows of my mothers death along with it all. However, recently, after selling my soul to the righteous devil, I’ve felt empowered. Right after Orin got killed by Emmy, who is my half-sister, I became his chosen. I have searched every corner of Baldur’s Gate seeking ways to murder so I can please my angry lord. Yes, the dragonborn used to produce Bhaalspawn is dead, but I’m now Bhaal’s chosen, and it’s only going to get worse from here.
Gortash came to me after becoming resurrected, admitting to me that he’s my father and he found out the entire truth just years later. He resents my mother for never telling him I was his son. He took me in, and I’m free to shelter and eat an endless amount of food as long as I obey his wishes.
“My son, have you gotten any sightings of Miss Emmy yet? I need to find her soon. She will receive the wrath that’s been long-awaited from her,” he mumbles, cracking his knuckles. “Maybe I’ll be merciful. She is my daughter after all.”
“The last I saw, she was eating breakfast at that Inn in Waterdeep where you had made contact with her mind. Her, that Wizard, and their baby were eating with some other tiefling. She was so absorbed into the mind tricks, I really couldn’t get too much info out of her. That was last tenday though.”
“They have a baby? My grandchild?” He hesitates, trying to process what I had just said. “Oh, even better.” The hallways of the palace are rather quiet as his voice echoes through the place. “This will be so much easier without Orin getting in the way.” My brow furrows, confused by what he means by that. Last I understood, she was alive and ready to rip apart the city again. Hells, if she’s dead, that just makes life even easier for me.
“Wait –”
“Yes, she’s dead. Again. Bhaal made his choice, realizing she’s really not as worthy as he thought. He found you, a much better predecessor. We’ll have to get into that later. This is the one instance I guess I could say I’m glad you worship Bhaal, though I hope you can join me in my praise for the almighty Bane. Ahem. Moving on to other matters.” He studies my face, realizing I have so much I need to ask him. “It appears you have questions. Out with it, son.” My claw scratches the flesh of my thigh, but I’m fighting the urge to dig for blood, even though it’s my own. I want to destroy it. Obliterate. Annihilate.
“Well, you mentioned the baby before. Why do you want her?” A smirk appears on his stern face as he begins to pace back and forth.
“You’re a paladin. An oathbreaker, like our dear friend Ketheric. I wouldn’t expect you to understand everything, so I’ll let it slide. That baby has a chance to grow up and dominate the brain, helping us control and gain power for ourselves. It’s not too late. I will please Bane and show him I really am worthy of this second chance.” I guess I can’t argue that. However, there is one particular issue getting in the way of the plan.
“I’m afraid that’s not possible, father.” Gortash sighs heavily and crosses his bulky arms against his chest, pouting like a toddler.
“And why not?”
“Emmy, that wizard, and the baby included – they’re all immortal. All of them. That baby won’t age, so she has no chance of falling to your demands.” Ketheric steps in next to my father, holding a serious stare with him.
“That also means Emmy’s memories can’t be affected if she’s immortal. If we chain her with the soul chains…we can take that from her. She’ll be weak like a squirming imp who can’t bother to fly.” Gortash smiles, nodding at Ketheric and impressed with his plan. It seems their goal is to gain immortality for themselves and conquer the world like before, but hopefully with success. I’ll be there to take control also, and bring those who refuse us to slaughter.
“Fanden, my son, I must say I am rather impressed with your abilities to get all the information I need about her. You’ve been keeping track without even being spotted, and for that, I must say thank you. I underestimated you. Bring Emmy to me at all costs. We will use the soul chains to grant us eternal life and suck out the weakness within her, unless we can somehow manage to get her to comply. We’ll go from there.”
“And if she somehow catches me?”
“Find a way to lure her in.”
“Tell her that little tiefling friend of hers was abducted,” Ketheric grumbles, his voice so deep it brings chills across my flesh. “If she doesn’t comply, he dies.”
I pick up my warhammer and place it behind my back, feeling a powerful urge within me to destroy. I have to fight the temptation to murder her right then and there, no matter what happens. I will become worthy of my father’s love and compassion…if Gortash even has it in his heart. I’d rather have his approval than Bhaal’s, but neither of them need to know that.
“And spawn? Try not to get yourself killed.” I nod as I turn around to storm out the doors.
“You underestimate my power, father.” He claps his hands together as he gives me an evil yet appreciative gaze, his smirk expressing hopefulness and determination.
“That’s what I like to hear, son.”
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incorrect quotes generator tag meme
so there's this incorrect quotes generator on perchance, and @worldsfromhoney tagged us to toss some of our ocs in it >:)
This was fun, so I'm tagging @kung-fu-cutbug @kitdriveyards @comicallycubicalcassie @pure-vanilla-lilies @kiraheartilly36 and uhhh anyone else who sees this and thinks "oh this looks fun" to also try this. if they wanna.
Oh and it's lengthy as h*ck cause my basic-bitch fandom trait is that I really fucking love incorrect quotes -
(programme note: there's a character in leaf story whose name doesn't get revealed for a rather silly amount of time. it's kinda an open secret on our discords but lol)
(redacted): *holds a gun out to Leaf* Leaf: I-I don't believe in guns. (redacted): Well, trust me, they're very real. Now take it.
Leaf: This bloodline ends with me. (redacted): That's the fanciest way I've ever heard someone say "I'm gay".
(redacted): I have lots of friends! Leaf: Name one. (redacted): Well, there’s- Leaf: Name one you haven’t gotten incredibly angry at. (redacted): Hey, that’s not fair, then there isn’t any!
(redacted): I’m doing what I can to jog your memory. Leaf: It’s jogging, I guess. Its tiddies are jiggling a little. (redacted): Nice.
Leaf: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm? (redacted): If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.
(redacted): GET BACK HERE YOU DUMB FUCK! Leaf: LET ME RUN FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS!
And now let's add some canon characters into the mix:
Colette: I didn’t know that air fryers are a real thing. Used to think that they were made up by the internet as a funny joke and that their purpose was to “fry air”. Leaf: WAIT, BUT IT FRIES THE AIR TO FRY THE FOOD?? Colette: I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS A KITCHEN APPLIANCE, MY FIRST ASSUMPTION WAS SOMETHING AKIN TO AN AIR CONDITIONER! Lloyd: IT’S NOT LIKE AN AIR CONDITIONER???? (redacted): You guys clearly don’t own an air fryer.
(redacted): How late were you up last night? Leaf & Colette, in tandem: Me? (redacted): No, not you two. You stay up late all the time. (redacted), to Lloyd: You.
Lloyd: What is love? Colette: An emotional minefield. (redacted): A neurochemical reaction. Leaf: Baby don't hurt me.
Leaf: ARE YOU- Zelos: Fucking. Leaf: KIDDING ME?! YOU- Zelos: Fucking. Leaf: IDIOT! (redacted): …What was that? Zelos: Raine banned Leaf from swearing, so I’m helping her out.
Leaf: I give up. I am so tired. Raine: Get the emergency supply! (redacted): carries Zelos and places him in front of Leaf Zelos: smiles Leaf: AND I AM BACK BABY, LET’S GOOO
Zelos: Subs are so fun to play with. All you have to do is hint at what you might do, back them into a corner with a look, or grab their wrist in a certain way and they're a wide-eyed mess. Raine: What the fuck kind of Subway are you going to? Leaf: Substitute teachers deal with so much shit. (redacted): Guys.
leaf is absolutely just committing to the bit on that one
Zelos: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?? Raine: Microwave for 40 minutes. 😔 Leaf: Why were you microwaving a lemon??? Raine: I read boiling lemons helps cover up up bad smells (I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges) but I didn't own any pots. (redacted): Did you burn an orange too? How??? Raine: Microwave for 40 minutes. 😔
Raine: I’m the smartest person in my friend group. (redacted): You hang out with Leaf, Lloyd, Colette, and Zelos. (redacted): It’s not as high a compliment as you think.
Colette: So, did everyone learn their lesson? (redacted): No. Leaf: I did not. Zelos: I may have actually forgotten one. Lloyd: Also no. Colette: Oh good, neither did I. Raine: *Exhausted sigh*
Raine: A mouse! Lloyd, pulling out a knife: Go back to where you came from or I'll stab you. Zelos, pulling out a frying pan: It'll make a nice meal! Colette, giving the mouse cheese: You deserve a treat, little guy. (redacted), gasping: It's Ratatouille! Leaf: His name is Remi, dummy. Raine: …I was going to say to just trap it and throw it out the window… what is wrong with you people.
Lloyd: Wait, hold up, why you draw yourself like that? Leaf: Uh, like what? Lloyd: Like with gorgeous, muscular legs. Leaf: Uh, this is what I look like. Lloyd: Leaf: THIS IS WHAT I LOOK LIKE! Lloyd: Okay, then I want big beefy arms. Hot ones. Colette: I wanna have a cowboy hat! Leaf: Okay, arms and hat. *draws them* Zelos: Ooh, give me a cowboy hat too! Leaf: You can't just take Colette's hat idea, Zelos! She thought it up all by herself like a good person! Come up with your own thing! Zelos: BUT I WANNA LOOK COOL! Raine: Put Zelos on one of those stupid baby tricycles. Zelos: NO!! Leaf: Tricycle, done. *draws it* (redacted), want anything? Raine, making finger guns: Pew pew. Leaf: A blaster?! No, that's not really our style, (redacted). (redacted), making finger guns: Pew pew. Leaf: You know what, okay. *draws it* But it's just for holding, not for shooting.
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