#anything else? nah

[politicalprocrastinator]

Close enough welcome back Mary Tamm

[plaguedocboi]

Least favorite animal/plant/insect/fungi?

I haven’t been a huge fan of ticks since last year when I got Lyme and I’m scared of wasps but other than that I don’t really dislike any living organisms. I think mammals are kind of overrated tho.

[caguaydreams]

boops might be gone but the experience will stay with me forever

[solarmorrigan]

Silly idea I talked about ages ago with @azure7539arts, inspired by a similar event my workplace hosts every year. Would minors be allowed to participate in such an event? Probably not! But then again, it was the 80s, who can say for sure. Anyway, it's my birthday and I'll post nonsense if I want to <3

-

“I need you to buy me.”

Eddie looks up from his notebook, effectively jarred from his campaign-plotting fugue state by Steve’s declaration.

Steve is standing at the other end of the dining table, staring at him expectantly.

“Y’know, this is the part where someone usually follows up their completely bonkers demand with an explanation,” Eddie says slowly.

“At the charity auction,” Steve clarifies. “I need you to bid on me, and I need you to win.”

Ah, yes, that weird Rent-an-Athlete charity auction the school runs every year; anyone on any Hawkins High sports team could volunteer to be “auctioned” off in order to raise money for said sports team, to spend a day at the beck and call of the highest bidder (within reason, supposedly). It’s generally restricted to students, but occasionally, prominent alumni are invited to participate – and Steve certainly fits the bill, especially after the story the government spun about his heroism in the face of “serial killer” Henry Creel last spring.

“And what, deny all those pretty girls a chance to get at you?” Eddie asks drily (he’d never turned up at previous auctions himself, but you could hardly avoid gossip in a school their size; it had usually been some cheerleader bidding with daddy’s money who won a date– that is, a day with Steve Harrington).

“It wasn’t always a girl who won,” Steve says, crossing his arms over his chest. “One time it was Mrs. Dalton – you know, the lady on the school board who lives on my block? I just spent the day doing yard work for her. She gave me lemonade. That was pretty cool.”

“Right,” Eddie drawls. “And I’m sure she definitely didn’t sit outside and stare at your ass while you were working.”

“She did not– she– I mean she was on the porch, but, like– she wouldn’t have– she’s, like, seventy, Eddie,” Steve splutters, and it’s all Eddie can do not to laugh.

“Older gals have needs, too, Steve,” Eddie says, giving in to a smirk. “So she was checking you out from the porch, huh?”

Steve goes red. “Shut up, that isn’t the point. I’m trying to ask for your help.”

“Right, right, your absolutely reasonable request for me to buy you at market. Why, again?” Eddie asks.

“The kids are planning to bid on me,” Steve says gravely.

Eddie blinks at him. “Okay?” he says, when no further explanation is forthcoming. “You basically do most of what they ask, anyway, so…?”

“Okay, believe it or not, I actually say no to at least half of what they ask me to do. I would literally never get anything done if I gave in to all their demands.” Steve jabs a finger at Eddie, who holds up his hands in mock surrender. “Anyway, this is all Henderson’s fault.”

“It usually is,” Eddie agrees, nodding sagely.

“He decided that he was going to bid on me and then use that day to finally make me play your nerd game with you–” Eddie snorts, and Steve shoots him a look, “but Wheeler doesn’t want me to play, so he said he was going to bid against Dustin and make me do anything but sit in on a session with you guys.”

“So let Wheeler win.” Eddie shrugs.

“No! I can’t let fuckin’ Mike win, he’ll probably make me do something even more ridiculous!” Steve exclaims. "He’ll make me play chauffeur for him and El on a date, or something, and he’ll probably include the stupid hat.”

“Wait, I thought El broke up with him,” Eddie breaks in.

“No, they’re on again,” Steve says absently, shaking his head. “Which is why Max has been in a bad mood lately.”

Eddie bites back the reflexive need to ask “How can you tell?”, going instead with, “I thought she and Sinclair were on again.”

“No, they are. That’s why no one’s been actively murdered,” Steve says.

“How do you keep track of all of this?” Eddie asks, squinting at Steve.

“It’s a natural skill. And we’re getting off track,” Steve says quickly. “Normally, I wouldn’t be that worried, because Dustin regularly blows his savings on weird science gadgets or whatever, but then Lucas and Will started taking sides.”

“This is getting very involved,” Eddie says.

“So you see why I’m stressed!” Steve insists, smacking a hand to his forehead (personally, Eddie thinks Steve is stressed for many other reasons, but he figures pointing that out just now won’t be appreciated). “Lucas is on Dustin’s side, and that kid does odd jobs like nobody’s goddamn business; he actually has shit saved up. And usually I’d have faith in him being more, like, sensible than to spend it all on this, but the little shit is really fucking competitive.”

“Wonder who he got that from?” Eddie mutters.

“Okay, we do remember that I’m not actually biologically related to any of these idiots, right?” Steve snaps.

“Well now we’re just getting into nature versus nurture–”

“Eddie.”

“Right, sorry, continue.”

“Well, Will took Mike’s side–”

“Shocking.”

“Right? But anyway, I don’t know if the kid has much saved up, but between him and Wheeler, they might be able to win.” Steve sighs, looking far more world-weary than Eddie feels the situation really warrants.

“You know you don’t actually have to do what they ask you to, right?” Eddie points out.

Steve rolls his eyes. “If an auction winner complains to the school that the person they bid on didn’t fulfill their end of the bargain, they can get their money back. It’s a whole…” he waves his hand vaguely, “thing. Happened once when I was a sophomore; Deacon McNab. Lost a good chunk of change for the football team, and they vandalized the shit out of his car.”

“Ah, right. Forgot we went to school with literal psychopaths,” Eddie hums.

“So, I just need you to bid on me and win, so I’m not stuck wasting a Saturday on whatever the hell the kids are going to try to make me do. Or not do. Or– whatever,” Steve says.

“Okay, not that I don’t understand your predicament here, but I think you’re forgetting something kind of important, Steve,” Eddie drawls.

Steve’s brows draw together in question. “What?”

“I’m fucking poor.”

“Oh.” Steve shakes his head. “I didn’t mean– no, I will give you the money, you don’t have to spend a dime, man, I just need you to get me out of this.”

“Why not have Buckley do it?” Eddie asks.

“That was Plan A, but she actually has a date that night, and it’s kind of a big deal, so I don’t want her to cancel,” Steve says. “But I assumed you wouldn’t be busy.”

“Wow, rude,” Eddie scoffs, and Steve sighs.

“Fine, sorry, I just really hoped you wouldn’t be busy.” Steve gives him the most lethal set of puppy dog eyes Eddie has ever seen, as if there had been any chance from the beginning that he’d be able to say no. “Please?”

Just for show, Eddie lets out a long sigh, falling against his chair and letting his head flop over the backrest like he’s deflating.

“Fine.”

“Thank you,” Steve groans, sounding so genuinely relieved that Eddie almost feels bad about how quickly his thoughts dip into the realms of the inappropriate. “Oh my god, I owe you.”

Eddie glances back up at Steve, tongue darting out to wet his lips almost unconsciously. “You know I’m not as easy to appease as a couple of fifteen-year-olds, right?”

Steve’s eyes drop for just a second—maybe down to Eddie’s lips, maybe not; who can say?—before he looks back up, cocking an eyebrow at Eddie. “I think I can handle it.”

Slowly, Eddie grins. “We’ll see.”

[amaltheas-garden]

people still shocked that in the year of our lord 2024 some of us don't want to see Dany get her 'happy ending' by becoming the white savior who was promised

[grumpygwen23]

Don’t mind me but there is Nothing I love consuming more than the trope of “the path one takes to avoid their destiny is the path that leads them directly to it”

Like

Odysseus really heard “I see a man that gets to make it home alive, but it’s no longer you” and “I see your wife with a man who is haunting, a man with a trail of bodies”

And said “fuck it. Fine. I’ll become a monster. I’ll be a horrible (debatable) person to everyone but those I care about to make it home. Fuck it, I’ll be cold like the gods tell me I must be, if that’s what it takes. Fuck this prophet, imma prove him wrong and get home and fuck up whoever this guy is who thinks he can get with my wife.”

BUT ITS HIM!!? The prophecy isn’t “someone else will make it home in your place, someone else will get to be with your wife” it’s Just. Not. Him. Anymore.

Because it’s a different version of him by the time he makes it home.

It’s a monster. With a trail of bodies.

And he hard right-turned right into that. By trying to avoid it. By trying to take fate into his own hands. But he’s playing right into it.

When does a man become a monster?

When there is no man left.

[buqbite]

keep your guard up, buddy

[twistedappletree]

are cultivators’ spiritual instruments only flute and guqin or can jingyi have a spiritual kazoo?

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

DAVE: you guys dont know how much south park and adult animated sitcoms hurt me. my bro has watched adult animated sitcoms all day every day for half my life and everything he says is a family guy reference or something. i came out to him as trans and he literally says like "well you know on family guy they at first had a hard time with this kind of thing but later they came around. that was a good lesson" its like his religion

JUNE: somehow, the weirdest aspect of this is that watching family guy made your brother LESS transphobic.

[triglycercule]

killer eating food in front of horror as a way to taunt him. duuuude do you see this delectable parfait he has in his hands right now. he just put a spoonful in his mouth. horror is scratching at his own arms right now (trying not to jump this bitchass). killer can't even taste it LMAOOO another bite ‼️ imagine not being able to eat food 🤣🤣🤣 killer can't even taste it and enjoy the food but horror can't even EAT food

then horror grabs the parfait glass out of his hands and oh killer you should probably teleport away before horror does to you what undyne did to his eye

[swagging-back-to]

worst trope is found family separating as soon as the antagonist is dealt with.

[polaris-likethestar]

my mom saw a post that maybe señor scratchy is agatha’s “husband” (like she turned him into a rabbit) and my mom liked it and even said now much she actually thought that was true

…..idk how to tell her but the lesbians have claimed agatha as their own and they’re not giving her back anytime soon

send help pls 😀

[some-teeth-in-a-trench-coat]

Ok I want to actually write some stories about Moth Wizard (no promises, this brain has ADHD) so uh I'm gonna ask because I'm curious what people are interested in and how many are interested. Also this was an excuse to write short introductions for everyone.

Moth Wizard: The protagonist only in a technical sense. He's a kind but clueless and sometimes awkward Jewish Wizard specializing in controlling moths. The story is not about him but the people he meets as we follow him through his post-apocalyptic world in the 6200's.

Esh: They don't make cool, mysterious characters like they used to. These days there's always a cynical twist that says "Just kidding! They're not actually cool haha could you imagine? How naïve to think such a thing would exist!" Esh exists in defiance of this. A powerful wizard who makes it look effortless roams the land cloaked in mystery. Even their gender is unknown even to allies.

Natan: A rather ordinary, or at the very least un-magical, Jewish man who's lived a long good life and it shows. A loving husband, father, and grandfather and altogether a kind and generous man.

Necromancer: Long after Natan's death, his remains were torn from the earth to serve an undead army, but something strange happened... This is the origin of Brakha.

Brakha: This magically animated skeleton mysteriously developed free will and is now burdened by the knowledge that her bones belong in someone else's grave. She's determined to undo the necromancer's work... but could she learn to live if she fails?

Bus Driver: A Jewish wizard specializing in portals and transportation has together with her wife restored an ancient bus, which she uses to help large groups of people travel great distances in no time. Her services are invaluable to her community.

Bus Driver's Wife: A Jewish woman married to the Bus Driver, she helps her wife maintain the bus and is a very skilled artist, decorating the exterior of the bus with beautiful renditions of the two women.

Pathetic Woman: Because where's the feminism if women can't be a bit terrible? A bitter old lady, stubborn to a fault and somewhat self destructive. She'll bite if you get too close. (This post, in which I create her, explains her better)

Wolf Golem: Shameless self-insert in my true form. With glowing eyes, flesh of clay, and teeth of metal, this wolf-shaped golem seems to always appear when it's needed the most, determined to defend its chosen people at any cost, but always hoping its growl will remain a warning.

[sirhenrymotherfucker]

The fact that the majority of DE content online is centered around kimharry/harrykim really is a testament to fandoms worst features. 1 million pieces of dialogue about many overarching subjects, the depth of character given to the npcs in Revachol, the history and commentary of the game and the majority of you choose to fixate on old man yaoi. And no before anyone rbs this like hehe yeah :3 know that I think you are less than a worm.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

I feel like barnabys favorite drink (alcoholic) might be a old fashioned? And non alcoholic mixed drink. Might be a Shirley temple. (Which Is my favorite non alcoholic mixed drink!)

(Of course this is all my opinion! But yea!

he Does feel like a classy guy, huh? but who's to say! Who's. To. Say...

[dailyhermitdoodles]

[433] I may be cringe but I'm FREEEEE