#any guesses for which position?
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Foundations of Decay — Chapter 11
as promised, the new chapter is up :”) tis an xmas miracle
we’ve got yet another long conversation, this time between harry & the concerned order members. mr. weasley snitches about madam bones and he has to face their accusations. in the process, he lays out some truths. truly, this fic is nothing but yapping extraordinaire. we love to see it.
go read it and tell me what u think!
#harry potter#sirius black#good godfather sirius black#but also#good godson harry potter#that rly should be a permanent tag for this fic huh#we’ve officially hit 60k words w this chapter#haven’t yet seen how many words it is actually hmmm lemme look it up#i quite enjoyed writing it. realising i love dialogue#next chapter will be fun#spoiler: irrelevant black family lore is dropped and walburga black is outed as a quidditch player#any guesses for which position?#regardless#i want to thank my anon once again. they are solely responsible for this miracle#i hope ur tea is perfectly warm and ur pillows cool and ur skin hydrated#fic: foundations of decay#pen’s writing
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Pages from trying to keep a little sketchbook-scrapbook type thing going for two weeks lol. I gave myself specific rules in hopes they might all end up more cohesive/consistent seeming, but alas, scribbly chaos reigns, it seems
#sketchbook#scrapbook#Actually I feel like these are kind of incomprehensible in photo form like.. In person holding the book its easy to look at#but as images on this scale I feel like there's so much tiny little text and small scribles and stuff you'd have to 'right click > open#image in new browser tab > zoom in' just to actually really see the thing. which for 7 images is excessive lol.. so. probably not the best#medium for sharing really but. I suppose I thought they might look cooler lined up next to each other. The whole part of using a#limited color palette is so that maybe they kind of seem to have more consistent color schemes or something throughout. but I dont#know if they look all that 'related' or not. I think these types of challenges I have always sucked at because I am a being of clutter and#excess. I can't just do like one little simple nice looking design and have that Crisp Neat calligraphy with evenhanded perfect lines#and perfect symmetical composition and etc. etc. Like some poeple post very aesthetically clean and cohesive looking sketch#pages or something but I simply cannot hold back the brain impulse to add more. more. more. Fill every single blank space with color#or a little drawing or a sticker or something. I take away 500 things and there are still a million there. Even when I thik I'm being#'simplistic' I'm still usually being 2x more complicated and cluttered than the standard or whatever lol. I guess thats clear from my#outfits/costumes though too. Like whatever that saying is from that person about something like 'before you leave the house take off one#more accessory. you dont need it' for me is like.. 'before you leave the house. add 10 more accessories. and 6 more layers. and another'#AAANyway. I wonder if also maybe some people would try to plan theirs in a way to look good or something or like.. plot things on the page#before placing them. I did sometimes have a theme for a day kind of (like day 10 I ended up finding a few gold and green things and then#was like.. hey... what if I looked for a few other things and only used these colors today') but aside from that I was just slapping down#stickers randomly and working around them to fill the page. Maybe a lot of neat minimalistic asthetic design is about planning and#having a Vision set ahead of time. instead of just complete random whatever. doodling whilst watching youtube videos or eating lunch. It's#a miracle actually I've managed to not spill any food on the book the whole time. anyway.. I do wish the highlighter really showed up. the#scanner kind of makes the colors look VERY different to irl. But also it got much clearer images than just camera pictures of pages. alas..#..Still oddly enjoy the phrase 'Salisbury Steak gently kissed with industrial pollutants'#probably my favorite section of 'gluing random papers and things onto the page' lol#Also I wonder if it's super obvious that I literally never ever use references when I draw (save for the few freakish looking youtube#face sketches) since everyone is always in the same positions and looking very similar ghhb. This could have been a good opportunity to#work on not solely drawing from my mind and try to do more Dynamic Experimental scribbles. NO. Same exact eye for the 90th time#be upon ye. But I guess it was meant to be casual 'daily doodles'. True 'practice' would make it seem too effortful like a full project. hm#(lol the one decimated pencil in the set... never hand me a writing utensil. i will passively destroy it somehow. shaving the sides of a#pencil off with a knife or snapping a pen in half as a nervous fidget without even realizing i've done it. sorry to the drawing implements)
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heyyy shoutout to the selfshippers who struggle with feeling lovey-dovey about their f/o(s).
maybe you don't think about them very often. maybe you can't imagine being affectionate with them. maybe you don't gush about them, or you find it hard to articulate how you feel about them. maybe you're not very active on your selfship blog, or maybe you don't have one in the first place. maybe you're neurodivergent or somewhere on the ace spectrum. maybe you're just independent.
for any reason at all, your f/o(s) would understand.
they know that affection is only one aspect of the feeling of love, and they would never assume that you "don't actually love" them just because you're less dependent on them. they would try to understand how you express your love in your own unique way, and they would give you all the space you need without crossing your boundaries or forcing anything on you. they would be patient and work with you to make sure both of your needs are met.
(pro/comship please do not interact.)
#self ship#self shipping#self ship positivity#selfship community#selfship#f/o#f/o imagines#i wonder if this even makes sense#idk. ever since i started taking new meds i've been struggling with feeling any attachment towards my f/o#which sounds BAD but it hasn't impacted any of my irl relationships and i think coming back to this community has helped#i think my whole romance drive has tanked. which is unfortunate :(#but i think she'd understand question mark? i dunno i'm just tryin to feel something i guess#oh and also#safeshipping#safeship community#i may be ace
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Thinking about Elizabeth Woodville as a gothic heroine is making me go insane. She entered the story by overturning existing social structures, provoking both ire and fascination. She married into a dynasty doomed to eat itself alive. She was repeatedly associated with the supernatural, both in terms of love and death. Her life was shaped entirely by uncanny repetitions - two marriages, two widowhoods, two depositions, two flights to sanctuary, two ultimate reclamations - all paralleling and ricocheting off each other. Her plight after 1483 exposed the true rot at the heart of the monarchy - the trappings of royalty pulled away to reveal nothing, a never-ending cycle of betrayal and war, the price of power being the (literal) blood of children. She lived past the end of her family name, she lived past the end of her myth. She ended her life in a deeply anomalous position, half-in and half-out of royal society. She was both a haunting tragedy and the ultimate survivor who was finally free.
#elizabeth woodville#nobody was doing it like her#I wanted to add more things (eg: propaganda casting her as a transgressive figure and a threat to established orders; the way we'll never#truly Know her as she's been constantly rewritten across history) but ofc neither are unique to her or any other historical woman#my post#wars of the roses#don't reblog these tags but - the thing about Elizabeth is that she kept winning and losing at the same time#She rose higher and fell harder (in 1483-85) than anyone else in the late 15th century#From 1461 she was never ever at lasting peace - her widowhood and the crisis of 1469-71 and the actual terrible nightmare of 1483-85 and#Simnel's rebellion against her family and the fact that her birth family kept dying with her#and then she herself died right around the time yet another Pretender was stirring and threatening her children. That's...A Lot.#Imho Elizabeth was THE adaptor of the Wars of the Roses - she repeatedly found herself in highly anomalous and#unprecedented situations and just had to survive and adjust every single time#But that's just...never talked about when it comes to her#There are so many aspects of her life that are potentially fascinating yet completely unexplored in scholarship or media:#Her official appointment in royal councils; her position as the first Englishwoman post the Norman Conquest to be crowned queen#and what that actually MEANT for her; an actual examination of the propaganda against her; how she both foreshadowed and set a precedent#for Henry VIII's english queens; etc#There hasn't even been a proper reassessment of her role in 1483-85 TILL DATE despite it being one of the most wildly contested#periods in medieval England#lol I guess that's what drew me to Elizabeth in the first place - there's a fundamental lack of interest or acknowledgement in what was#actually happening with her and how it may have affected her. There's SO MUCH we can talk about but historians have repeatedly#stuck to the basics - and even then not well#I guess I have more things to write about on this blog then ((assuming I ever ever find the energy)#also to be clear while the Yorkists did 'eat themselves alive' they also Won - the crisis of 1483-85 was an internal conflict within#the dynasty that was not related to the events that ended in 1471 (which resulted in Edward IV's victory)#Henry Tudor was a figurehead for Edwardian Yorkists who specifically raised him as a claimant and were the ones who supported him#specifically as the husband of Elizabeth of York (swearing him as king only after he publicly swore to marry her)#Richard's defeat at Bosworth had *nothing* to do with 'York VS Lancaster' - it was the victory of one Yorkist faction against another#But yes the traditional line of succession was broken by Richard's betrayal and the male dynastic line was ultimately extinguished.
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I don't think Izzy hates Valentine's Day, but I do think Izzy hates Valentine's Day- the pomp and ceremony of it all, the crowds and the noise and the expectation to do things that he doesn't enjoy, or find romantic, or see the point of. Flowers die, restaurants are as busy as they ever get (not to mention his food intolerances), chocolates and hearts are a hollow present that shows his partner doesn't know anything about him...
He's happy to do something romantic, mark the occasion- even if they could do it just the same at any other time- but what he wants is something that feels like it matters to him. A quiet night in with his favourite meal cooked exactly how he likes it, a rerun of his favourite movie.... time spent together with nobody else around. A simple, quiet love.
#i feel i need to qualify that this is modern au where izzy is marginally more chill about things#(because. you know. its not 1717 and hes lived a different life and has different opinions)#(which i feel is obvious but apparently it isnt always. so: its modern au and hes lived a life where romance is much more normalised)#(hes still a grumpy old man about a great many things but like. hes been on a date before)#nyxtalks#ofmd#izzy hands#israel hands#this was another one that was originally an edizzy thing but the words just. arent happening i guess :/#so you can have this instead- and i left it vague enough that you can make it any ship you like <3#the original idea is an edizzy post-stede thing but i also think it holds up as post edizzy & izzy finding a partner who values what he#wants on valentines day & doesnt ask things of him they know he actively dislikes#(like that was the point of the edizzy one. ed doing something focused on izzy for once- but its just as good as rizzy or sprizzy or ouizzy#or ANY izzy ship!!! the point is the tenderness to HIM for once. he always buts himself in that position to cater to what his partner wants#(to his own detriment!) but i want to see someone do that for HIM)#(i think he would cry a little)
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kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....
#bungou stray dogs#been thinking a lot about chuuya lately (shocking for me i know (said with no sarcasm truly lmao it is rare for me))#cause of the 15 manga and also playing the fucking jeht quest in genshin impact ugh (where's the one dual genshin bsd fan who Understands)#but like this pressure has been building up for chuuya for so long due to being used and manipulated by all these people#first the sheep then mori then verlaine then still mori now#he was groomed since childhood just like dazai#but unlike dazai he didn't have an oda to help him get out of the mafia........ he's still stuck there#and his personality is different from dazai's. dazai was more self-aware imo (but still a groomed emotionally abused kid don't get me wrong#but chuuya's whole thing is needing to belong and wanting a leader to be loyal to but ending up in positions of leadership himself#which makes him feel pressured but he accepts and stifles any negative feelings just because he wants to belong#and all this crushed him with the events in the light novels and yeah he went through character growth but he's...... Still In The Mafia...#and that fucking scene asagiri added to the cannibalism stage play i don't think hardly anyone even knows about bc IT'S NOT DISCUSSED ANYMO#where mori emotionally manipulates him with the flags!!! and it deeply hurts him!!! and he presumably deals with that shit all the time!!!#it is WORRISOME. it WORRIES ME okay.#chuuya doesn't have anyone who can save him from the mafia (dazai is in no position to okay; it's all he can do just to try to save himself#and it's so so scary. it spells awful things for him.#didn't asagiri say he'd have a rough path or something??? and he added that fucking scene in the play!!! it haunts me!!#i fully expected this shit to hit a turning point in the meursault arc but we can't have nice things i guess#and as for kunikida a;lskdfl (took me this long to get to him oop) literally the ending of Entrance Exam (the novel) is just#One Big Foreshadowing for Kunikida's downfall#he's compared to the azure king for a reason. Sasaki saw the azure king in him for a reason. it's fucking worrying!!!!!#there hasn't really been anything like that since in the manga (just like for chuuya lol ugh) but he's TERRIBLE at coping with his trauma#and it only gets more apparent once shit hit the fan in the doa/hunting dogs/meursault arc#it's not good!!! i'm worried for kunikida too!!!!#even if the manga isn't focusing on this these worries are always in the back of my mind man#both kunikida and chuuya are doomed to hit some kind of breaking point eventually and i await those moments with dread yet anticipation#i want dazai to be able to save kunikida from the despair being too good a person brings the way he couldn't save oda#and chuuya.... if we get a scene with him & mori mirroring the one in dark era where dazai finds out that mori orchestrated the kids' death#oh man i think i'll fucking die (give it to me i need to cry)
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sorry i haven't posted much lately! tbh i've been feeling kind of burnt out and massively unmotivated with palia. don't get me wrong, i still really love the game (especially the characters and the worldbuilding) and i have tried to log in and play but tbh the game itself just isn't keeping my attention rn.
i don't blame the devs at all since i know they're going Through It rn what with the massive layoffs, california fires, and losing money. that being said, the little story progression, constant game breaking bugs every update, and Way too high prices for things,,, it got to me. it sucks because i do really love this game and i Want to devote more time to it but i've lost the motivation to do that.
i'm hoping that i'll gain at least some of it back with the elderwoods update but i also can't help but feel some trepidation at the thought of the release getting pushed back and what kind of bugs will inevitably come with it.
anyway, ik i don't have to explain myself or anything, but i just wanted to let you guys know i guess? i Do still love the game and i anticipate future updates (and hopefully getting sucked back into it) but for now, i'm not devoting a lot of time to it. i'm thinking of doing some art for the characters just so i don't lose interest completely but the game itself is taking a massive backseat :/
#cw negative#kinda?#*game criticism#also kinda??#also i Know its not a fair comparison at all considering the size of the companies#but ive been playing infinity nik.ki since it's release and in Two months it already has way more content#faster addressing of bugs and more surveys#ive spent money on it!!! and gotten way more for way less compared to what the pal.ia devs are charging#it just kind of reminded me of what a good game is like lol and that sucks but yknow#and while i have concerns about some of the gameplay im still really motivated and i know i wont have to make my own fun#which is what i've had to do with pa.lia for like two years now#again massively different games with massively different resources but Still#im just having so much more fun and the community is still really positive#even the people who have concerns are expressing it in fairly chill ways instead of the Constant dev badgering with pal.ia fans#OUGH listen i still love the game (hassian my beloved) but i probably wont be playing it a lot until the next major update#idk has anyone else been feeling the same way with the state of pal.ia?#like i want to support the devs but also god everything is so expensive and for so little in return#not just the actual thing youre buying but also story progression in general#and so many bugs......... i know we all expect it at this point but also that in and of itself sucks??#like just expecting something to be buggy and never get fixed like okay#what if i want my game to be fun and work properly... what then.....#adhglajdhg#if any devs are reading this sorry i guess i salute you for still working there please add hassian and reth kissing in game thanks#aldglda
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#just a little mental health check in mostly for myself just to write it down#I'm in a weird place#in some regards I've been doing really well lately#I've been more social which always does wonders for my mental health#on the other hand a couple weeks ago I was home alone for a couple days and I was so stir crazy I almost couldn't handle it#I've actually been happy with my body for the last few months and I haven't had any anxiety about food nor have I attempted any restrictions#that's been a big bonus#I'm having a lot of trouble with decisions lately. I'm second guessing everything to a stressing degree#I feel like a bad person for reasons I can't totally pinpoint. like I think I'm manipulating everyone but to what end I can't tell#and there's a part of me that knows this is irrational but I can't shake it#it's so weird being aware that I'm doing so well in many regards#but I'm also able to feel myself slipping into types of paranoia that I know I'm suseptible to#today's been better but for the last few days my heart rate has been noticeably high (which says a lot because it is generally high)#it's caused unease#I don't know if I really have a point to typing any of this out#I'm feeling fine overall. I'm happy with my life right now. I have plenty of things to look forward to in the near and further future#I can just tell something is a little off and I think it might be beneficial to my future self to write this out for sake of timeline#I really need to start tracking my period because it totally might be that. or you know. I have OCD and anxiety is just a part of my life#who knows. it could be a mix or nothing or everything#I don't think anyone's reading this whole thing lol but if anyone does I do want to leave the reassurance that I'm fine and I'll be fine#like I said. just keeping an eye on myself.#oh I thought of another positive thing! I've been way less freaked out about chemicals lately! that's a nice note to end this on!#ashley rambles
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For the first time ever, I used tarot as a method to try and contact Lord Apollo. I've been anxious about it for a while, but today the sun shone brightly and I saw some beautiful art of him, so I just.. felt compelled to give it a try. It went better than I ever could have expected and I truly do feel cared for, and that what I do in devotion to him is enough.
#val talks#should i tag. im scared. but this was a very positive experience so why not have this be the post that might make people perceive me lol#hellenic polytheism#apollo deity#apollo#apollo worship#helpol#apollo worshipper#lord apollo#if anyone is curious i pulled a card for confirmation that i was talking to him (got temperance which is associated with him. so yay)#and then asked a few questions. some related to me and my practice. some related to more personal topics. and they all were answered#very nicely i feel. queen of wands about if what im doing is ''enough'' which ties to confidence and self-assurance so i'm sure it's a yes#the emperor when asked if he had any opinion of me thus far that he wanted to share which i interpret as a confirmation that i can seek#stability and security from him and depend on him. maybe? that's how i read it#and more. but y'know. very positive stuff hehe. the card i got on one of the questions i asked seeking advice was possibly the most#appropriate card i could have pulled for the topic so. i'm honestly very happy about it!#tarot#hellenic pagan#i um. guess. anxious to talk to people and maybe get perceived but hey! why not try
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Some mild existential dread in the house today
#im just feeling reeeeally really drained#works taking a LOT out of me#like. it feels less intense day to day? or maybe im reacting less? but its still very much piling up#and im just feeling very...idk. like im still waiting for permission to live my life#except now the permission osnt coming from any one person its. having the money to docit#and the time and the energy#and i guess thats just what adult life is? waiting#and hoping#and along the way losing sight of what i even wanted in the first place because im so *tired*#idk. i definitely need a project of some kind but im struggling to settle on something and then organise it#i have stuff to do today anyway. alfie had a lil bit of emergency cash saved so i need to go shopping#and i need to tidy the kitchen and do some dishes#and have a bath and shave at some point#i also want to draw but again. struggling ti pick something and idk if ill have the executive function spare#AND i want to try and be more social and talk to folks but thats its own kind of difficult#part of me would like a disc server that just has all of my friends in it bc i find it easier to dip in and out of conversarions#but i imagine that would be weird for folks who dont know each other#idk. lot goin through my mind when all i really want is sleep#which also hasnt been...greeeeat lately#mainly because Alfie wakes me up in the mornings bc they dont like being alone but also have a very different sleep schedule to me#and can take multiple smaller naps over a day whereas i really need a solid 8 or so hours or i just. dont fully switch on#but theyre also struggling atm (mentally and also they got an injury at work AND seperately broke their foot ffs)#so they need me more and its just#this never ending cycle of SOMETHING needs my attention#and its fucking exhausting asfghfkd#but!!! we keep goin!!!!! been applying for a bunch of jobs and havent heard anything positive yet but. we keep tryin huh
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... why he sit like this
#in this position his face is extremely 'cartoon cat' shaped.. like the perfectly round cheeks and little#rounded bump of a snout.. big round eyes. etc. stretched over the arm of a chair like a weirdo#cats#It's still Hot Evil Summer time and I have so much to do so am just aimlessly hopping between various projects but not actually#getting anything done. as usual. Also so so so so tired. I almost fell asleep in the middle of the floor like 3 times today lol#Trying to finish some costume photos and also another poll adventure thing. plus I do really want to do a sculpture sometime#I haven't finished one in a while. Hopefully my tiredness is nothing bad.#Maybe I'm anemic again so that's making me tired. Or maybe it's just a Listless phase. not that I'm ever really THAT productive considering#all of the health problems and etc. always holding me back. but still. I'm not usually 'sleep or just stare at a wall literally all day' ty#e unproductive.. at least not for multiple days in a row so. hmm... Sometimes especially in the summer though I will have periods of time#that are listless like that. I am under low level phyiscal stress for months at a time due to summer heat so I guess it makes sense#that would eventually take a toll. I just have SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO!!!!! AAUUGhhh#I also came up with a new idea for a game that is so so cool and I wish I could make it but I have to finish the other one first lol#which I will NEVER do. if I spend all day just sleepy unfocused barely able to do anything#I also really need to sell some clothes and sculptures because I'll probably have to buy a new computer soon so I need money. (plus still#recovering the costs of having to euthanize my other cat.. wehh) There's nothing clearly wrong with it right now but it's getting gradually#slower and there's more weird glitches happening randomly and idk.. just weird things that make me think 'hmm... bad.. possibly.'#ANYWAY... I just have so much to do that I both REALLY want or need to do - so it's perpetually frustrating that I just can't for whatever#reason like. Time is always mving forward. every day I waste is a wasted day. The year is already almost half over. I havent finished#any of the projects I wanted to .. and there's only more and more things to do each day. It's overwhelming and stinky#and thats not even considering having to do all of my tasks also with the background noise of economic inequality. everything increasingly#going into an even scarier political direction. active climate change crisis. pandemic that still exists and is insane to act otherwise. et#etc. HOW am I supposed to solo make two whole games . write 3 book series. finish sculptures. do costumes. make outfits. game videos. make#stable network of social connections. do my little side crafts. take care of myself and cats. pay rent. manage health issues. keep a routin#.try to make some sort of money. go to doctors appointments. handle regular maintenance like cleaning and cooking and self care#and buying new plates when old ones break or etc. make sure to do other things like backup my computer data regularly. do shopping lists.#take care of plants. pursue like 6 different academic interests. do the other side side projects I have for fun (like music or carving avoc#ado pits). eat in a healthy way thats okay for my Special Health Issue diet. exercise so i don't die early. etc. etc. etc. AND all while it#82F in my apartment all the time and I have tiny income and also need to move to another country/climate somehow??? lol......#ANYWAY.. ..very frustrated today over my chronic Tired Sleepy.. time for Cat Photos - which cure all of life's ailments lol
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more scenes that basically everyone sees but pointing out a specific detail i find interesting: "though i hope you don't cause a scene this time" does avery regularly cause scenes at parties?? lmao
#original post#citations#avery#i don't need to maintag any of this this is just for me. a tumblr is a diary first and foremost#i really need to start actually paying attention on avery's dates so i can better understand what her deal is. like i get the gist#but i like to know specifics. which is obvious if you scroll thru this blog for thirty seconds. also she doesn't tell us what her job is!#“businessperson” is vague#it pays enough for her to be a sugar mommy and for (gestures to the post-school helicopter scene) but her actual social standing#seems. unstable. like girlie is NOT secure in her position. i guess this contributes to why i find f!avery more interesting than m!avery#she's very intentionally being shallow and looks-based by toting around this pretty young thing on all these damn Events she gets invited t#and obviously she seeks power over money because if it was just the money she wouldn't bother suger mama-ing us#also. we're not special to her. she finds another young thing if we piss her off too much. like i said it's looks-based it's playing to#the people in power she wants to impress (and subsequently become)#AND DESPITE HER “APPEARANCES ABOVE ALL ELSE” NATURE she has anger issues <3 which obvi looks bad if you're flying into a rage in public!#looks bad if you're being violent towards the pretty thing young enough to be your kid who you're toting around like a trophy!#and back to the subject matter: causing scenes at parties does not endear you to anyone either girlie#she really wants to be one of the wealthy powerful socialites who has everyone under their command but she can't even rein in HERSELF#let alone her orphan of the week. my failwife <3
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I always found it slightly awkward how media makes siblings or people who see each other as siblings call each other brother/sister all the time as in real life you almost never see people do that with their own siblings (maybe someone out there like that)
In the case of Arkham Shadows I see why they did though because Bruce quite literally tells Harvey he loves him and Harvey says it back. Can't have the audience think Batman is in love with the DA.
They had Bruce pay for his college, pay for his campaign, pay for his surgery, pay for his therapy and had Harvey have him as his best man at his wedding. Wow..... Sugar baby Harvey is real.....
The calling sibling title thing is less common in English than in some other languages for sure- me and a couple of my siblings do it on occasion, but it's for a bit then. More common is when I call one of my close family friends "my sister" or "my nephew" when talking about them to someone else because it's faster and easier to say that than to say "my friend who I've known since she was born and lived with for a few years and consider a little sister" or "child of a close family friend who considers me an aunt" to someone who doesn't know them. Which is a lot of words to say that if they wanted to fully sell me on the brothers thing they should have either had a different bit or should have referred to the other as "my brother" when talking to an unrelated character instead.
But "oh no we have to make Bruce not look gay" has been a problem DC has struggled with more than once for many decades and it basically never works so I guess at least they didn't try to solve it this time by having Bruce pick a lady love over Harvey or cutting the holding hands thing
Because I saw that scrapbook! I know Harvey has been Bruce's sugar baby since he was ten years old! But we can't have Bruce take Harvey's hand and call him the love of his life because ok technically that's Gotham but also because gay. And we can't have Bruce take Harvey's hand and call him his best friend because they're not ten anymore and somehow that seems gay also. So brothers it is, I guess. Even if I think my brothers would bite my finger if I ever tried to pay for everything for them on that scale, guess it's different at billionaire levels
#I'm actually simultaneously a believer in grew up like brothers and absolutely down bad romantically#(and harvey as a representation of Gotham itself as a love)#like an election in two (three) positions at once#but the point remains- you can't really fully cover the care by slapping a brother label on it like dc tries to to avoid it being too gay ig#which is very funny because did you see all the bi Tim and Dick stuff in Gotham Knights- but Robin has always had more freedom than Batman#in the 'can we let anyone think he's anything other than totally straight' department#anyway now I'm thinking about how on earth-3 all the characters get a morality flip#but Two Face/Three Face is the only one i can think of who gets a gender flip as well#as if 'oh if we had just originally conceived of Dent as a woman it would have been better (morally) because then it wouldn't have ended up#looking so gay'#but no they did not explore that thread because apparently uh having love interests in the joker and riddler was more important#which you'd think should reflect back on standard issue harv eddy and clown but uh. not really no they don't want to admit it#and i suppose 'well no three face wouldn't have a thing for owlman because he's technically not a version of Bruce he's a version of b's#brother'#but like then again. if Harvey is his brother. then shouldn't something have been used there to connect it#in any way at all#but no#instead I'm left with many thoughts about Harvey as a brother as a lover as a personification of gotham and as a woman but#i am still very sleepy rn so i don't know how many of those thoughts are coherent#but all that to say#YEAH SUGAR BABY HARVEY#guess it wouldn't be comforting for Harvey to shakily ask what he is#and Bruce to answer 'you're my companion who i turn to for affection in and give you obscene amounts of money in turn'#but like. it also wouldn't have been incorrect.#... though 'sugar baby harv as part of the representation of Gotham itself' probably has something to it too#but i digress I'm sleepy#pocket talks to people#anon#* i meant 'electron' not 'election' in that earlier tag
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Good Lord. Okay. Listen. We all agree that pre-timeskip Houses Dedue is not doing so great in the mental health department. We all agree on that. My guy needs therapy about his survivor's guilt and his PTSD and we're all agreed his self deprecation is Intense but like.
Listen. You can't…address that without also acknowledging he's like that because people have been Fucking Racist To Him Constantly for the Last Four Years of his Goddamn Life. And not like, just ‘microaggressions at the workplace’ racist, though also that too. Like, ‘somebody might fucking murder him’ kind of racist. He's not just insecure or whatever. This man is trying not to get hate-crimed.
It's rational, actually, for Dedue to assume that Any Given Faerghan is gonna be racist to him, because before going to Garreg Mach every given Faerghan except Dimitri HAS BEEN super mega turbo racist to him everywhere he goddamn goes. There's no reason for him to believe his classmates are gonna be different. Like, he doesn't know Mercedes is from the Empire! He has no reason to believe Chivalrous Knight Fanboy Ashe doesn't hate Duscur and everyone from there for regicide. Annette is the only one with a pass and only because Dedue respected Gustave until he went out for cigarettes and never came back, abandoning not only Dimitri but also Dedue in the process. The safest thing is to assume people are gonna come at him hot and preemptively deescalate the situation.
Like, he suffers from the “you can get C and B supports after the time skip” weirdness for sure, but even in his C supports, even if you get them before the skip, he is fully willing to tell Felix where to stick his fucking grapes, and he's willing to tell Ingrid she can be as big of a bitch about it as she wants but he's still going to do his job on the battlefield even if that means keeping her alive. He's consistently assertive of his boundaries with Dimitri in all their supports, including when Dimitri wishes that he did not have a particular boundary (using Dimitri's name and calling each other friends, things it's actually physically not safe for pre timeskip Dedue to do).
Because he is confident Dimitri isn't gonna fucking lose his mind at Dedue about it. He's also confident Felix, Ingrid, and Sylvain won't do a hate crime at him if he's acting in capacity of Dimitri's Vassal because of their fundamental loyalty to Dimitri, so he can safely tell them to shove it also. He tells Gustave he's a disappointment to Gustave’s face in their support!! Dedue isn't just a shrinking violet or whatever, he's just judicious about what shit he's gonna start, and how likely it is that talking shit is gonna get him hit.
(Also, yes he's a quiet guy... But also he's interacting with all these people in his second language, which he has no formal training in and which he learned from Dimitri. He really has to think about what he's going to say before he says anything because there is very little margin for error for him to misspeak without consequences and he knows it.)
Honestly unpopular opinion because like while I'm under no illusions that they did clearly fake out killing him for reasons other than his personal growth, I actually think it was in Dedue's personal best interest that he spent the timeskip in Duscur. This man hates Faerghus, he says that to Dimitri in their supports, but he's been stuck with them and having to just put up with it because he had nowhere else to go (even aside from the fact that Dimitri is literally the only living person in the world who loves him and he's terrified of losing that).
He's very clearly much more self-actualized when he returns, and in a much more relaxed and self-assured emotional place after the timeskip. Probably because he wasn't the one and only Highly Visible Do A Racism Here target and instead was with his own community, where he could actually unpack all that shit safely. Dedue needed that time outside the Racist Aggression Bubble of Faerghus to deal with his survivor's guilt properly.
You really can't address Dedue's self-image issues without also digging into the way dealing with constant racism reinforces those issues. You super cannot. Race and racism and how he deals with it is critical to the character. Is it always handled gracefully by the narrative?? No, absolutely it's not, but it is in fact in the narrative and you HAVE to engage with it if you're going to engage with Why Dedue is Like That.
#Dedue Molinaro#fe3h#disclaimer that I'm a white lady and I'm not trying to get out of my lane here but like.#I keep seeing fic that wants to address Dedue becoming more self-actualized but which. Absolutely refuses to touch the topic of race#like. hey maybe his experience with race and racism is fundamental to Why he is the way he is#Dedue is complex it's not as simple as he just has poor self-esteem or whatever#also tbh one of those was just so tone-deaf like there was one line that was i guess supposed to be positive but i was like#good lord author you are this close to actively calling him a slur without any awareness of it at all#actually tbh the tone deafness seems to be a recurring problem in fic featuring Dedue let me not lie#anyway.#racism
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I know everyone said it a hundred times but if Sonic Prime really was about Sonic not caring about his friends enough why did they kickstart the plot with Sonic losing his shit because Eggman said his bestie was ugly
#sonic the hedgehog#sonic#and tbh I don't think this really is what this is about#it's more like sonic getting to know his friends better#by putting himself in their shoes#or meeting counterparts that lack some of their personality traits which highlights that the ogs do have them#sonic prime#like the whole thing with thorn where sonic is forced to play the role that amy is said to usually play in peace negotiations#or like.when they really try to make us believe in the first ep that tails doesn't get emotional and is more concerned with stopping eggman#vs nine who's angry at everything all the time and mostly cares about his own comfort. etc.#but sonic keeps treating him like he's tails and it's not really working#nine obviously got attached but they aren't actually connecting. it's like they keep talking past each other#dread who completely lacks any of knux's positive qualities that sonic mentions...#the vibe is more 'sonic loves his friends but doesn't really get them'#I guess it would lead to him appreciating them more but it's not like he doesn't already? idk#it's just a weird thing to start the show with if this is what you're going for#project.txt
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The Mufasa movie was really good and really bad at the same time but it wasn't bad for any of the main reasons people are saying it was bad for, y'know?
#which makes this movie SO hard to talk about online#because you can't say even a single positive thing about it without getting 'So you're a Disney shill?? Lmao enjoy your slop. Sonic clears!#this movie has so many genuine issues with pacing and music and runtime and character development and tone#but if any of your complaints contain the words 'Ahadi'#'Uru'#'canon'#'retcon'#or 'biological brothers' then......sorry but shut uuupppp#none of that intrinsically makes it a bad story#ooh I'm sooo sorry this big budget company didn't acknowledge your favourite c-tier spinoff book for children#as an idea? I think Mufasa and Scar being non-bio related absolutely rocks. Same with all the stuff about Mufasa founding the Pridelands#and uniting the animals. Like in theory that goes so hard!!! But...#there's so many good elements in here that get so so close to being a great whole but they just don't come together cohesively#its nice to have a new third best Lion King movie I guess#although it probably the most frustrating installment in the franchise yet. more so than the remake
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