#and when he does

[they-hermes]

the darkest hour of the darkest night comes right before the dawn

au where cdrw are orpheus and eurydice but in this version eurydice doesn't know of the deal between orpheus and hades

[justascrollingghost]

Does someone want to fucking explain to me why Kitt would do that to Kai because I’m about to start throwing hands

[xstarlightxstarbrightx]

thoughts on how the Liyue Archon quest went [5]

Bolai: so what kinda silk flowers u guys want Paimon: uh. the good kind? Bolai: Zhongli: lists the flowers Bolai: oh i see, u three must be this fine gentlemen's servants then! please refrain from contributing further! Kaeya: Lumi: ???? bro. Bolai: anyway!

i love how, immediately after, Zhongli just,,, yaps about flowers. he's so silly, and he yaps so much. and also Kaeya and Lumine are just like "oh,,, he's so knowledgeable,,,, and also his voice pretty,,,,,,,,"

and then immediately it's followed up with "oh do you have any mora to pay for these flowers?"

anyway, the Traveler Trio go off to get the flowers turned into perfume after the whole thing, while Zhongli goes and waits by the Statue of the Seven. while i am focusing mainly on Lumine and Kaeya rn, i do think that currently, Zhongli's just,,, burdened by such a heavy weight? he's probably still thinking about this decision he's made, and is probably consistently thinking of the outcome it'll have. he's a God of Contracts currently thinking heavily about this Big Ass Contract(tm) that he's got rn. so it makes sense that he kinda just,,, stops to stare at this Statue of his Divinity.

meanwhile, with the Traveler Trio goes off to like,,, talk to women abt perfume.

Paimon: [in reference to some NPC i forgot] Paimon remembers she smells pretty good! Lumi: Lumi: we barely spoke to her when we first arrived here, why are you SNIFFING PEOPLE, PAIMON Kaeya: even by Lumi's standards, that's weird.

anyway, Lumine gets a Weird Vibe(tm) from Ying'er and Kaeya, meanwhile, is personally very concerned and disturbed by the,,, innuendos that Ying'er uses when chatting with them.

on the way back to Zhongli, I like to imagine that Lumi tells Kaeya about her theory while Paimon is charging ahead. she's incredibly adamant about him being the Geo Archon, but Kaeya's not convinced. the current belief he holds is that Zhongli is more likely an adeptus of some kind��because Zhongli's DEFINITELY not human. but the God of Commerce not knowing about Mora??? pleaaaase.

and while Lumi's like 100% sure, Kaeya makes the joke that 'maybe Zhongli was just a simp for Rex Lapis before he died or something, lmao'.

and then they walk in on Zhongli staring at the Statue and kind of being Zoned Out(tm) and Kaeya's just like "hmmmmmmmmmmm"

[batcavescolony]

Katniss is such an unreliable narrator. She says "Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me" girl you deliver strawberries to the Mayor, you hunt and trade for the district, when you fell at Prim being chosen someone caught you, when you went to Prim people parted for you, when you volunteered EVERYONE stopped. Idk how to tell you but I think you're a pillar of the community.

[review-anon]

See, she is chill, just know she will get pissy if the wolf shows up and she doesn't get the killing blow - Abno anon

Yeah I suppose you are right, its nice to have something around which isn't murder trigger on sight.

And I know the Voidship is big but a giant wolf isn't exactly hard to miss.

Yeah, hopefully if he does show up he would be Kokichi's problem and then...

We can deal with two birds with one stone.

[m3djed]

"he would not fucking say that" but you ever be looking at fanart and suddenly its "he would not fucking have abs"

[captainsaltypear]

IS ANYONE ELSE GONNA TALK ABOUT THIS OR

[monkesupreme]

ref

a satisfactory answer for Selina

[noodles-and-tea]

Continuation of this

[freefallintothevoid]

Whenever Bruce can't do something as Batman he sends one of his kids in the cowl. Literally any of his kids. To deal with having to wear the cowl, they turn it into a game: will the justice league notice that Batman isn't the person under the mask?

Spoiler alert, they don't.

Somehow, the league never notices when it's not Bruce under the cowl, or at least that it's not the same person they all know.

Like never.

______

Hal: Hey Bats, you look taller today.

Jason, determined not to lose: hm

Hal, sensing danger and immediately backtracking: uh, that's not to say you don't usually look tall, I mean you just look taller today, um did you change your ear thingies?

Jason: *Batglare intensifies*

Hal: uh, I'm just gonna go

_______

Aquaman: you've been quiet this whole meeting, Batman, even for you.

Cass, currently wearing shoulder pads and absolutely insane platform boots: *a fim huff of breath*

Aquaman: right sorry, I forgot you were dealing with another mass break out from Arkham this week, you don't need to stay for the whole meeting. We know you probably know everything already anyway

Cass: *nods*

_____

Flash: Morning Batman. *zooms past*

Duke, absolutely befuddled:

Duke, quietly into his comm: you'd think the speedster would have the time to notice

The several batkids on the other side of the line: *laughing hysterically.*

Dick, wheezing: just do the thing where B tucks the lower half of his face into his cape like he's Dracula. You're doing great.

Bruce, from somewhere in the cave, actively giving up on the assumption that his coworkers have at least one working braincell between them: stop comparing me to Dracula, Dick

[carryondrawing]

An alternate universe where The Archivist forgets to top up his oyster card and misses the train

[evgar]

nicky loves putting flowers in his mama's hair, naturally whenever rio is around she makes sure to grow the prettiest ones for them

[inkskinned]

okay is she being actually immature or is it just a woman over 30 expressing a human experience you find to be immature.

like yeah. at certain ages... let shit go. im not defending the real immature shit. im not defending the karen you're picturing. i worked in retail i hate those people too. (once somebody got mad at me because she didn't like how our winter window decor was a snowman smoking a pipe. i wish i was joking).

but men at 57 will write books about how 17 year old girls are soooo sexy. they will invent worlds where women have to be naked for "armor reasons." they will write songs that treat women as objects. people rush to defend them. meanwhile a woman at 35 will be like "heartbreak is hard, actually" or "i feel betrayed by a friend" or "i am struggling with something emotionally." immediately people will say stuff like this woman is 35 by the way. by the way this woman is SO OLD to be experiencing this. BY THE WAY.

im 31, almost 32. the other day a poet was blasted online because at her "big age", she had written a poem about feeling unloved. top comment was "this woman is 29 by the way." this woman is too old to still be useful, by the way. she has to behave better . maybe if she was a good wife and mother she could stop existing loudly, and the story could continue on without her. this woman has served her purpose, by the way. she's so cringe, by the way. at 29 - so old! - she still hasn't figured out that her existence should be one of shame.

[eydilily]

would you bite the hand that feeds you?

[starii-void]

going to chb must be crazy like imagine sharing a camp with

-one of the strongest demigods ever who's saved the world like at least 3 times, fought multiple gods & titans and WON (and is a tartarus survivor)

-the literal main architect of OLYMPUS who's also saved the world multiple times (also tartarus survivor)

-THE lord of the wild who's also close friends with the first two (and has helped save the world multiple times)

-an emo kid from the 1930s who again helped save the world and is also a tartarus survivor (TWICE)

-a son of apollo who survived tartarus with nothing but cargo shorts and sheer will (pun intended)

-the main designer and builder for the argo II, also the first hephaestus kid to have fire powers since hundreds of years ago (did i mention killed gaea? no? yeah he did that too)

-a girl who somehow charmspeak-ed gaea into falling back asleep (also side note daughter of super famous actor because why not)

-pretty much everybody is a two-time war veteran

-THE GOD APOLLO who just sometimes comes down to visit in the form of a teenage boy

-did i mention dionysus, god of wine madness and theatre

-also chiron, trainer of pretty much every greek hero ever

[vozart]

he just needs them to get together or something

based on <3