#and trans men sorry you guys are too masculine

[fioredivenere]

Lesbian things I did

before realizing I am, in fact, a lesbian.

Being jealous and overly protective to my girl best friends

Having only one girl best friend at a time, because I only ever think of my girl best friend.

My first kiss was to a girl and for the next four years no matter who was in a relationship (with some other guy), we kept kissing each other in secret.

The first time I had unrestricted online access I only ever search for wlw content.

I only ever had crushes either on the super popular guy (bc that's the correct way to have crushes, am I right) or the super shy and introvert guy. Both ways I only ever went for the impossible guy and then oopsies, I Guess I Have to be Single forever.

The guys I ended up dating where always stereotypically feminine guys, either because they were so much shorter than me, or had long hair, or had very soft personalities.

For almost every guy I dated I secretly thought what would I do if they came out as transfemme. I even used a filter to see how they would look like as girls. I am not making this up. Guess what? I always thought I'd stay if they wanted to transition and all.

As a kid I was so obsessed with a weather reporter girl, who's extremely attractive btw, and I still have a crush on her.

As a kid the first time a boy told me he liked me I ran away in fear and disgust, without saying anything, and hid from him for the rest of the time.

In middle school this boy was super into me and tried to kiss me in multiple occasions. Every time I would slap the shit out of him. [note: this boy I was kind of in a "relationship" from the age 5 to the age 11. I never actually liked him and I only referred to him as my super best friend. He used to shower me in romantic gifts (as much as a kid can do) and try (unsuccesfully) to hold my hand, hug me and kiss me on the cheek. We ended this thing because I told him I only liked him for his toys (that I couldn't have at home because they were "boy toys") and I actually liked the popular older kid. I shattered this poor boy's heart, and in return he traumatized me by locking me in a classroom with his older friends holding me up against a wall just to kiss me on the lips a couple years later at 13) Now back to the regularly scheduled program:

I barely ever notice if a guy is attractive, but I think almost every woman is stunning.

I'm super into any kind of femininity, anything associated with it really.

I remember perfectly, down to the smallest detail, what every single best girl friend was. But I keep forgetting the faces of the guys I dated... This specifically might be caused by other reasons, but I listed it anyways because it sounds gay af.

When I tried to come out online as lesbian a year and a half ago I was the happiest I ever been. I then was shoved back into the closed and I buried everything for a year, but you can read more of this on my other post "My queer journey".

When I'm with a girl I like I'm literally so happy I get euphoria and start laughing like an idiot.

My biggest aspiration in life is to own a beautiful country home with a partner. This partner must be not-a-man.

Well, I also made this list.

[snobgoblin]

I'm gonna be so real and I don't know how to address it but fellow trans men you *have* to be more normal about other trans men being feminine. I promise this doesn't make you look like a girl. let other people express their gender differently and stop policing others, and other peoples characters, on how feminine they are allowed to be. I'm not sure where this comes from. be more normal about femininity I know it was forced onto you so I see how you would reject it. but. you've just gotta work through that I dont know what to tell you

[feline-evil]

Dick or no dick confirmation Pickles was always going to be trans to me anyways; if he's swingin' somethin that's phallo babes, if he's not then his t-dick fat. What's not to get.

[gaylittleguys]

I hate it when people make posts or whatever like ‘ugh 🙄 I can’t believe I’m a MAN 🤢🤮 I grew up thinking I was woman and women are so great and pretty and I’m just a gross stinky man ew’ like ok. speak for yourself I love being a man it fucking rules. trans masculinity is awesome. you sound like you need to sort those feelings out for yourself dude.

[trans-estinien]

people really love to conveniently forget trans men exist when they talk about feminism. or if they dont they make us out as also part of the problem as if we somehow are able to have the same amount of privilege as cis men. absolutely wild

[certifiedsexed]

hey there! i don’t mean this in bad faith at all, and i’m not trying to use a term that’s a fascist dogwhistle. i promise i’m just confused😭

so i’m not a guy, nor have i ever been perceived as one, but in one of your recent posts, you said that men can’t experience oppression solely based on the fact that they’re men. which was kind of confusing to me — i don’t think you’re wrong, i think it’s me but i don’t know how to get to how you see it like that.

because in my experience, men can experience oppression because they’re men, although i don’t know if i’m saying that right or conflating the meanings of certain terms. i’m probably wrong, and would just love some clarification?

for example, my brother and i were always held to different standards growing up — it was expected of me to always cry and be emotional, and i was a ‘stone cold bitch’ if that wasn’t the case, but if my brother wanted to show negative emotions like sadness he was treated like there was something wrong with him too. and i know it wasn’t my brother — i spend a lot of time working with my high school’s diversity team, and in a lot of the events we organise, guys talk about how they feel enormous pressure to be angry and never sad, and to have stereotypically masculine interests and never deviate from that norm.

i also know men who’ve struggled to get jobs such as teaching as those are viewed as ‘female’ jobs and it’s a common view that men who want those jobs are ‘only in it to be around kids’. i’ve heard many women around me perpetuate sentiments like that, so i know they’re not making it up, even if it isn’t equal to the systematic oppression women face in almost every aspect of their careers.

i’m not providing these examples to prove you wrong, since i do think you’re right. i’m hoping that a window into the way i’ve always thought might help you clarify this in a way that can help me to change my mind, since i just think i’m lacking some clarity or context here. i think i’m conflating abuse and stereotypes with oppression, but i’m really not sure. any advice would be really appreciated!

i’m so sorry if this comes off badly, i don’t mean it that way. i’m just trying to learn, i promise i’m not trying to promote the kind of hate and close mindedness you’ve been seeing in your inbox as of late.

Hi! As always, I do not mind answering genuine questions!

The things you're talking about growing up and seeing boys around you pressured to present only certain emotions, that's part of the patriarchy!

Certain emotions are supposed to be "feminine" and thus boys shouldn't show them, while girls are often always considered "emotional" in some fashion. That's not oppression based on those boys being men that you're talking about.

It's the backlash that the patriarchy, and by addition trans/misogyny has on men. It's boys being pressured not to show certain emotions because those emotions are "feminine" and they're supposed to associate feminimity with weakness and shit.

What you're talking about there is also trans/misogyny!

The idea that men who do things perceived as feminine are predators, the idea that specific jobs are "female" jobs [while even in those specific female jobs, men are generally paid better and find it easier to get into those jobs than women trying to get into traditionally "male" jobs"]

[Though obviously this varies based on race and whether they're trans, etc, etc.]

To be a little more clear, all of the things you're talking about don't primarily affect cis men/boys. They fuck up transfems, because it's trans/misogyny.

You're right! It's not systemic oppression.

You might wonder if it's social oppression, which is also a no. Social oppression would require a historical/systemic oppression behind it. But that doesn't exist in this case.

What it is is the common issue oppressors run into. While they benefit greatly from oppression, there is also backlash they face from their own systems of oppression.

Like white people who fall into suicide cults trying to work towards white supremacy, or TERFs who fall into groups where they slowly pick each other off as they discover they're not all exactly the same and wind up accusing each other of not being "real" women, systems of bigotry simply do not work out perfectly even for the oppressors.

They never do.

To create the patriarchy, you must establish trans/misogyny, you must establish intersexism and you must push people to conform to those ideals, even if they hurt your own.

It's similar to how white supremacy can harm white people, despite white people obviously not being oppressed racially. The backlash of oppression hits even the oppressors sometimes.

Suppression, as a term, would honestly work far better to describe what you're talking about.

So yes, it's stereotyping, yes it's abusive to tell your children not to show/feel their emotions but it's not oppression based on these guys in your life being men! It's part of how trans/misogyny, transphobia and intersexism are enforced.

I understand exactly where you're coming from! It doesn't sound bad and I genuinely don't mind answering questions! Especially since you've got some good ones!

I'm not sure if I rambled too much to explain this properly but I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions and/or need me to clarify anything here. <33

[genderqueerdykes]

Regarding one of your recent posts heavy agree. I'm a straight (heteroflexible) trans man and the amount of times I've been assumed to be cishet because I act masculine or talk in dudebro terms is insane. I've noticed such a difference in treatment from when I was a butch lesbian to now. If I speak on treatment of lesbians I'm hit with people assuming I'm someone who couldn't possibly understand because I'm obviously not queer and obviously haven't had the same experience for the majority of my life. I've been insulted, mocked and gossiped about simply for being a trans man, in a *queer space*

This is about trans men/mascs but I do want to return to a point I made - straight trans people. The way people treat us is god awful. I denied being trans for so, so long because of the fact that people assume straight = cishet. If you want to speak about cishet people, just say cishet. You don't need to just say straight and then go "this doesn't include trans people btw" when asked. Going from being the "local cool GNC butch lesbian" to "Kyle" is a jarring experience in terms of social interactions.

Being a straight, aromantic, man is a triple kick to the nuts too because it's automatically assumed to be sex crazed guy on the street that doesn't care about love and only wants to fuck. Aroallo treatment is a whole nother topic too.

Sorry for going on a rant. I didn't mean for this to become so long. A thought sparked, and then another when I was typing.

that sucks so bad, i'm sorry you've had to experience this. that's so nasty that people switch on a dime, just like that, but its a very real experience and you're not alone. i've known a lot of transhet guys and i hate how people treat y'all, you're not evil for being straight. first of all, you're still queer, but second of all, there's not anything wrong with being straight. it's not the concept of straightness that hurts people, it's being forced to be straight that does.

it's really frustrating how people want to distill butches down to being the Cool Butch. like nobody really seems to care for us aside from wanting praise for seeing us as cool. it's very depersonalizing, and it shows, because the second we change the terms we use to identify ourselves, suddenly, we're not cool anymore. all it takes is changing the words we use, not ourselves. i want people to think about this.

people refuse to be normal about aromantic men. i really don't know why people make the jump to "dangerous predatory heartless emotionless asshole" when they hear aromantic man. it's very puritanical and conservative to insinuate that love has to be involved when sex is or else that person is dangerous and predatory. really speaks volumes for what people really think about sex and romance

i wish you the best of luck in finding people who understand you better. some people are so determined to hate when it accomplishes nothing. stay safe

[mikaela-the-slut-expert]

yayyyy 💕 then can i ask for a scenario in which the reader, who’s a trans guy, volunteering to be the bride in the ghost groom scenario and threatening to stab anyone who says anything about him looking like a girl with platonic feng xin + mu qing and romantic hualian? (or just xie lian, since technically hua cheng is only there for like, .5 seconds lol)

(💥 anon)

Masculine Bride?

HuaLian x ftm(?)reader

IM SO SORRY 😔 I'VE HAD THE WORST FEW MONTHS OF MY LIFE BUT I LIVE I WILL BE COMPLETING REQUESTS AGAIN THANKS FOR NOT GIVING UP ON ME AGAIN GUYS ☺️🖤

____________________________________

☀️Feng Xin didn't want to be in this ridiculous mission at all. He has to deal with Mu Qing in disguise and he has to see Xie Lian who was once his best friend. So it feels a little awkward to him but he gets to see you too! So he's quite happy to see you and Xie Lian again

☀️When he finds out that the plan is to disguise as a bride he immediately says Nuh uh. No way he's doing that, Mu Qing would never live it down.

☀️But when you offer to disguise as the bride, since you do looke somewhat androgynous he's like great!

☀️He doesn't have to do it and he can protect you if you all get in harms way

☀️Honestly he's surprised you volunteered so quickly. Feng Xin knows you'd rather stay in your male form and he knows you don't like appearing feminine much these days. Gods do it all the time so Feng Xin doesn't mind. Have you seen Shi Qingxuan?

☀️So everything was going great, they got you dressed and the one village girl did your makeup so you didn't look like a clown. But then they ran into those annoying men again.

☀️ They were congratulating Xie Lian, Mu Qing, and Feng Xin for finding a pretty bride and even wanted to join up, but they all knew the men just wanted to eat off their success.

☀️So when you laughed and explained you did make a good bride even though you're a man, No one really laughed. The men had genuinely thought you were a woman sooo they try to call your bluff.

☀️You did in fact change forms to look more like a bride but it doesn't feel good to have every single feminine feature to be pointed out. You're used to it so you weren't going to say anything but the group of men freeze and their skin pales when you hear a crack behind you

☀️Feng Xin may or may not have broken a pillar. May or may not have damaged his own temple. . .

☀️it succeeds in shutting the men up because what man is able to just break a God's pillar?!

☀️Feng Xin has to admit he's pretty irritable, but hearing the group of men bully you just pisses him off. He knows he's supposed to be in disguise and not gain your attention but he can't stand by and watch you be passive about it.

☀️ When the men practically evacuate the area you only laugh softly and link arms with him saying, "I found my guard!" You already know it's Feng Xin🙄

🌕Mu Qing was also your best friend and you never really gave him the chance to distance himself from you like he distanced himself from Xie Lian.

🌕Mu Qing has been with you a long time and he knows you're more comfortable identifying as a man. He has no issue with it. It took some time getting used to but he doesn't care as long as you're happy.

🌕so hearing the group of men start pointing you out so blatantly ticks him off. He knows he can't harm mortals but he sure wishes he could.

🌕It's not against the rules to threaten them though, so when he threatened to cut off their hand because it's rude to point isn't against the rules either.

🌕You were surprised honestly, Mu Qing doesn't care about a lot of things and doesn't usually get violent unless it's with Feng Xin.

🌕but you laugh when the group of men run off and you lean on Mu Qing. Saying you're so happy to have your own personal protector

🪷Xie Lian doesn't really fight. It's not that he can't he just doesn't see a point to do so.

🪷but that doesn't mean he'll let people bully you either

🪷 You've stuck with him for awhile so you're used to just taking mean words in stride. Xie Lian has never let them get away with it though.

🪷So it comes as a Surprise to you all when Xie Lian uses rou'ye to tie the group of men up together and he "advised them to go away before something unfortunate happens"

🪷You smiles and kiss his cheek, linking arms with him with a smile.

🪷"You're cute when you're protective"

[stormyelliotwritez]

hello! i’ve written a request for you before and it was under anonymous but i’ve decided that i have no shame in my game soooo, i was wondering if you could do a fic or headcanon where reader is autistic and has touch aversion. And this obviously hard on logan and wade but, they find out part of the reason reader has touch aversion is because they’re uncomfortable with their masculinity (they’re ftm trans). Alsothey grew up with a difficult and toxic childhood so saying i love you and showing love through physical affection is hard. (they show they’re love by acts of service or cooking/gifts) but in they end they’re happy and reader is more comfortable with touch and stuff. Please and thank you! <3

(sorry this was so long i was just YAPPING)

yay!!! Hi!!!! hehehehehehehehe yeah i can and also coz this is so me and i love it, you can have headcanons and also a mini ficlet!!!

DATING THEM AS AUTISTIC!FTM!READER WITH TOUCH AVERSION

they’re both very touchy guys so when you freak out and get annoyed at them for touching you, they both get a bit disappointed but they respect it

wades the one who finds out it’s partially because you’re trans because he accidentally bumps you in the chest and you just seem really uncomfortable and a lightbulb goes off in his head

logan does some research on how autistic people can feel weirded about by touch and he also talks to trans people about dysphoria because he wants to understand you

you start cooking and giving them gifts and logan goes oh because he’s seen this before in kids who came from bad homes who try to show their love in other ways

they wanna make you feel heard so they listen to you no matter what and they accept whatever you give them

after a while, you start to let them touch you a little bit and they’re both so happy.

wade literally squeals with joy when you don’t get annoyed at him when he gives you a hug

they wanna help you feel more comfortable in your masculinity so they make comments about how men are really hot and nice and how you’re great and that other men they’ve known weren’t as nice or cool as you

they also buy you clothes and other stuff so you feel more comfortable in your own body

when you let logan give you a kiss on the neck, he almost stabs his leg out of happiness

ficlet time!!!!!

Logan and Wade had been sitting on the couch. They were watching TV and waiting for you. Wade had left the recliner free so you could sit there if you really wanted. When you eventually walked in, you sat down in between them on the couch. Both their jaws dropped and they looked at each other behind you and both grinned.

“Are we watching something or not?” You asked as you leaned back on the couch and leaned your head on Logan’s shoulder.

Logan got a surprised look on his face like when you have a cat and it hates people but then it lays down on your lap. He covered his mouth with one hand so he wouldn’t make a noise and scare you off.

Wade was also shocked and he was even more shocked when you grabbed his hand and tried to pull him closer. He leaned his head on your shoulder as best as he could and wrapped his arms around you.

“I love you guys,” you said quietly.

They both smiled widely. They hadn’t ever expected this and it was fine that you didn’t like touch or saying that you loved them but they were both on Cloud Nine now.

“I love you too,” they both said at once.

The three of you then settled into a content silence as Logan turned the movie on. They were both so happy that you finally felt completely happy and safe.

[babsaros]

hey. when cis society is oppressing a trans man, what he is experiencing is. In Fact. misogyny. i'm sorry i know none of us like to be reminded of our agab, and it hurts whenever people perceive you as the wrong gender. but a cis person hate-criming, assaulting, verbally abusing, etc, a trans man is not doing "transandrophobia" because they do not perceive him as a man.

they perceive him as a woman failing at her gender, as a woman who has been seduced and lied to and manipulated because women are so easily led astray, just like it says in the bible. they perceive him as a woman who has been mutilated. they perceive him as a dyke that needs to be fixed. if they are hate-criming him because they *do* perceive him as a man, because he passes well enough they aren't thinking he could be trans, then they're doing so out of homophobia, perceiving him as a gay man, a pervert, a sissy, a danger to children. OR, they are being transphobic but specifically because they think he might be transfeminine instead. when cis society oppresses a trans woman, they are able to do it on multiple levels at once. She's a woman failing at her gender, a dyke that needs to be fixed. Or she's an evil and grotesque crossdressing pervert, a rude caricature, a danger to polite society. she will never be doing enough to escape oppression entirely, no matter if she gets every surgery she can and wears makeup every day and passes perfectly, because she lives under a patriarchy, and she's a woman, so she lives in a panopticon, and HAVING to get surgery and wear make-up to be respected IS oppression, especially if the alternative is being hate-crimed.

trans women (and trans men who pass) are not experiencing "transandrophobia" when a 'queer women and nbs" event turns them away at the door for being too masculine. they are. IN FACT!! experiencing the byproducts of misogyny in a patriarchy!!! where the terfs and coward cis women running those events and occupying those spaces have been taught (sometimes through experience, sometimes by men, sometimes by women) throughout life that men = stronger and more dangerous than women ALWAYS. That they need to protect themselves at all times and always be vigilant. That men and women can't be friends without sexual tension (and so as queer women the mere existence of what they perceive as a "man" is a threat). That women need a separate sports league because they can't possibly compete with someone who has even a little bit "extra" (an unquantifiable amount actually because there isn't a standard range) testosterone. That women should cook and men should fix cars. i promise you, i promise i promise i promise. it's misogyny. like!!! you don't say cis gay men experiences "androphobia", bc that's not a thing!! you sound like fucking mens rights activists guys please! you don't say a black man experiences "misandrynoir"!! because living in a patriarchy fundamentally means men do not experience oppression based on their gender. its not happening. shut the fuck up. stop walking us back to 2014 can we please take a step forward and stop bitching about this. there are genuine issues in the world and i'm frankly sick of people who should be smarter than that needing to be gently hand-held through this fucking explanation for the millionth time and still stomping their feet.

[genderkoolaid]

hey i wanted to get this off my chest and i feel like u r someone who will get it! im an out trans guy and i work with mostly cis queer women, and the other day a trans man (wearing a trans shirt- we chatted :3) shopped in the store and afterwards one of my coworkers (who is my close friend and dating a transmasc person and i trusted her) LITERALLY said she could tell he was a trans guy “because he was too nice and trans guys who are nice are so obviously not actually men” and went on and on. she tried to walk it back a few minutes later with “i mean they’re the real men and cis guys aren’t” i didn’t say anything (i’m a coward) but like fuck. cis women are so comfortable calling us fake men and acting like that’s not a horrific thing to say. like it’s a compliment even. sorry for the rant i just feel so gross and stupid and evil for being a trans guy around women !!!!

need people to understand that "i can clock trans men because they're so nice and docile and polite" is one of those complementary-stereotypes-are-still-harmful things.

for one its kinda giving "women are kinder because they are biologically predisposed to caretaking and motherhood, so they are naturally kind and generous because thats how their brains work :)" misogyny. Obviously a lot of trans men do act differently than cis men because we had to personally confront toxic masculinity and what it means to be a man & likely personally experience (or have in the past) things like misogyny and menstruation. Similarly, a lot of women historically have been motivated to help others because they wanted justice and cared about others lives. But there are also trans men who are huge assholes and women who are deeply selfish and cruel, and a lot of how people are is based on their choices in reaction to the situation they find themselves in by birth, not the situation itself.

Its like. saying "Ashkenazi Jews are biologically smarter than others" sounds like a compliment, and someone might even say it trying to be genuinely nice. But its rooted deeply in antisemitism & notions that Jews are supervillains who could overpower White Christians. There's a difference between "Jewish culture values education and study" and "Jews have higher IQs, because they are essentially a different species, and I totally don't mean this in a Nazi way and if you think that, maybe you're the real antisemite!" Same thing here. If your "compliment" is othering to the people you are complimenting, then you should rethink it.

[eva-does-its-best]

can you shut the fuck up youre making all trans guys look bad so fucking annoying. insane that u cant handle any fucking criticism whatsoever lol holy shit. whole ass fucking paragraph. gotta put that evil mean trans woman in her place right. god forbid someone gets frustrated at being consistently shit on by people in her community. im gonna be so real rn and say that as trans guys / tme people we have it so much easier its actually insane (coming from someone whos been thru corrective rape when i was 12 after i came out as a trans guy btw! theres my fucking pound of flesh. jesus.) not even rly trying to convince u but u just piss me the fuck off annoying as fuck

First off: So sorry about what happened to you, my most sincere condolences. It's the only thing I can really give, hope your life gives you enough peace and happyness to allow you to live with such an event.

Second:

You're making all trans guys look bad

I'm not a trans guy, I'm a transmasc, very different, a difference you should if not care about at least keep in mind if you want to respect less binary forms of masculinity. I don't speak as nor speak for trans guys, because I am not one, maybe if you actually read what I write you would know.

Insane that you can't handle any fucking criticism

Criticism where? Let me be absolutely blunt and sincere: All I see in the posts I replied to is tired, scared and hurt people who cope with said feelings by turning their vents into everyone else's problems.

I vent a fucking lot, everyone can see that, but when I vent I am sincere and point the source of my pain, how I feel, why I feel that way, and which people I believe reinforce it. What I don't do is go out of my way to involve people who have nothing to do with it or with how I feel.

Trust me I know how they feel, and the way they are dealing with it is incredibly self-destructive and I want nothing more than for them to get out of that shitty mental state that hurts them so they can feel better and have a slightly better life and emotional responses to the world.

Whole ass fucking paragraph

Yeah, that is how one transmits ideas. Shocking.

Gotta put that evil mean trans woman in her place right

I've replied to a couple posts so I don't know which one you're talking about, but I've no clue about the gender of the people who I replied to, I simply replied to shitty ideas, don't care who's behind them.

Pretty lame that you try to make this a gender war, don't you think?

God forbid someone gets frustrated at being consistently shit on by people in her community

"her" ok so this is you personally defending someone you know, I can tell.

Statement goes both ways don't you think? You think this is just for fun?? Yeah let's start a conflict that is affecting the lives of real people for fun!

We are fucking tired of the mockery, the disrespect, and the extreme policing of transmasc and trans men's language and experiences by people who have no say in them.

Do you care about that too or are you a hypocrite? Because when I reply to people's shit-ass posts I do in fact care about them otherwise I'd ignore em and let em keep hurting themselves.

"Oh but these ones attacked this person" I. Don't. Give. A. Fuck. There are shitheads everywhere, in every opinion and side of any conflict. There are gonna be shitheads who use this as an excuse to attack people of a certain particular gender they already had something against, it is irrelevant to the ideas exposed. Let's not act like there isn't a whole plethora of posts about killing transmasc please, you SHOULD care avout that too.

As transmascs/tme people we have it so much easier

You're free to have an opinion about your own experiences and I have no horse in that race. HOWEVER:

•You're not the only transmasc in the world and your opinion is very clearly not a universal truth, so don't you dare spit on everyone else's experiences by deciding what's true and what's not without counting with them.

• In your dumbass dychotomy of "tma/tme" transmasc are not the only ones put on the "tme" label and the same way I cannot talk about YOUR experiences you have no fucking right to talk about everyone else's experiences specially the ones from other identities and lives that you did not get to be or experience.

•Without dipping my toes in your opinion or your experiences I profoundly disagree with you.

• Lastly, WHO THE FUCK CARES WHO HAS IT WORSE?! WE'RE ALL FUCKING HURT AND BROKEN WE'RE LITERALLY KILLED IN THIS WORLD FOR JUST EXISTING, YOU WANT A COMPETITION??? GO FIGHT FOR TRANS PEOPLE'S RIGHTS TO COMPETE IN SPORTS INSTEAD OF CREATING OPRESSION OLYMPICS. GET YOUR COMFY ASS OUT OF YOUR INTERNET ARMCHAIR AND GO SEE WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE WORLD FFS.

There's my fucking pound of flesh. jesus.

Again so sorry you had to go through that, but you realize the whole point of this is to be able to have words for those specific forms of opression and awful events right?? To have experiences like that respected and treated with the seriousness they deserve right??? That is what we want.

You experienced transandrophobia, and the people you're defending right now don't want you to have a word for it, or allow only words picked by them as if they had any right to speak for you. Respect yourself more, man.

Not even rly trying to convince u but u just piss me the fuck off annoying as fuck

Hey at least you're honest, good. I don't give a fuck though, if you wanna keep hating me I have good news for you: I don't plan to ever shut the fuck up, enjoy.

The one person you hate is not me anyway, that is plain obvious... but that's a you thing to try and work on.

Sayonara dude👋🏻

[lufyuu]

(I accidentally deleted the ask last time so bare w me, I'm so sorry anon😓 , it was about how my ocs would react to a trans reader)

Well I'll start with that none of my ocs will treat you differently regardless of the fact you're cis or not! Maybe they have different thoughts of you though

➤Eun Hyunwoo

He probably didn't know you were trans before working with you. He just thought you're a very pretty man<3 I mean, there are feminine looking men in the industry too so it doesn't matter if you're feminine/masculine presenting! He'd be extra careful during sex though, he's not ready to be a father and with your job...it's impossible for you to be pregnant whilst working at the same time. He's also always going to be there for you when the gender dysphoria hits, he doesn't understand it as he himself has never felt it but he'll do anything in his power to make you feel better. He often affirms your gender by calling you all sorts of things. "My pretty boy" is what he loves to say the most. He also loves to refer to you as his boyfriend a lot. And I mean a lot. He's partially flexing the fact that he's dating you too.

➤River Sterling

Mans didn't pay much attention to you before your first meeting, but he had heard about the rumors of you being afab. He brushed it off since it's really none of his business. When anyone talks shit about you just for being trans, he's ready to give them the "shonen background character treatment" if you know what I mean lmao. He's always going to use protection during sex! You're both in your early 20s! No way he's going to be a dad! Loves the idea of it though. He probably once tried to turn you into a cis man, not because he wants you to be one, but it was when you were having major gender dysphoria. He thought he'd be a good boyfriend and give you a dick and balls. Unfortunately, even the powers of a protagonist have their limits. His efforts were still appreciated, though! Loves stroking your hair while calling you "the loveliest boy he's ever met". He's an ass at times but can be sweet when needed!

➤Liu Zihao

Couldn't care less that you're trans. He has a duty to uphold, and that is to punish you for your wrongdoings. Though he does think it's convenient since getting you pregnant would be easier now. Who could blame him for wanting to breed you full of his cum? He's been waiting for you for so long it's only right for him to take what he wants now. He isn't the type of guy to babytrap you though. Gender dysphoria? Now that, you have to explain to him. Despite being in a powerful man both in the political stand and in general, he's only learned about the laws. He doesn't really understand humans. When he does get it though, expect him to be very supportive. Maybe overly supportive. Probably empathizes the word "boy" a lot when referring to you. Not that there's a lot of people he can talk about you to. He just doesn't care what you have under your pants.

➤Han Minho

I'm not sure how this one would work as the way reader met Minho was through military training where everyone was amab but let's say they do meet. Again, doesn't care much. Though he's ready to be a father, it all depends on you whether you want to start a family with him or not. He'd rather your parents know about the situation first before anything that far happens. He doesnt strike as a guy who knows that much about gender dysphoria. Probably awkwardly caressing your back as he tries to again, awkwardly comfort you. "You're a boy..I don't know what's the problem..?", he's trying his best.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for changing my (30 FtM) name?

I was born with a very angrogynous/masculine name. For the sake of this post we'll say it's Alex Andrew Lastname. I was bullied for it growing up and can often see on people's faces that they were expecting someone different when they see my name first. I never liked my name growing up because I didn't think I fit the vibe. I'm just not an "Alex". But honestly, if I ever fully pass, that could change.

I recognize I've hit the trans guy jackpot. I've seen quite a few trans men change their names to my birth name, first and middle. Logically, I'd never have to change it for safety or validation reasons.

I've been using a different name for years now. My partner of 10 years doesn't know me by another name and cringes when we have to use Alex for legal paperwork. This name has been public knowledge to everyone including my family for about 8 years. We'll say this new name is "Elijah" (it is not)

The problem arises when I bring up my final legal name choice to my mom.

"Why that? I would have never named you that. I don't think it suits you." I double down and explain I like the name and don't mind the religious connotation (we went to church but she's always appropriated eastern religions, I am not religious) Additionally, SHE should have been using it all this time, even when I'm not there. She complains. "Can't I still call you Alex? I mean, I gave birth to you, I should still be able to call you Alex. I gave you that name because it was androgynous and cool, why do you want to change it?" I tell her again, no. If she's the only person deadnaming me, other people will feel they have the right to. "Can I call you Al?" No, sorry. "Can I call you Andrew? I named you after your uncle, he didn't do anything wrong."

Because she's pushing back so much, I tell her the truth. Growing up, she was abusive and negligent. When she did use my name, she said it like she hated me. When I was in trouble, when she was disagreeing with me, when she bullied me. She didn't really say my name in rare situations where she was proud because she was jealous and focused on making sure everyone knew I was cool and "unique" because I was "her kid". Because of it, I cringe when I hear my birth name. It's a strong name, a good name, even, but it makes me feel small and tired. I told her I was proud of her going to therapy, that we could start over, but that I'm asking to be respected as a person.

Shortly after I was born, she asked my grandma to draw up a tattoo of my deadname. It's a large, dark piece on her entire lower back. I told her I don't expect her to cover it, that she can keep it and mourn the name however she feels, but I'd like to get a matching, small tattoo with her to celebrate my new name if she's interested. She didn't really respond. She finally said she still doesn't like the name Elijah, but asked if she could call me Eli (yeah, obviously)

Despite all of this reaching some sort of compromise, I've heard I've made a bad decision from both sides. Some think I was too gentle and understanding and should have essentially said "fuck you this is my name take it or leave it". Others think I should have kept my deadname because there was nothing wrong with it, I'm being too emotional about it, or that I'm choosing to inconvenience others by changing things age 30. There's also the idea that no one really likes their name so it's not a great reason to change it.

AITA for having no real reason to change my name and doing so anyway?

What are these acronyms?

[steelestallion]

I’m sorry to ask you this if you’re just on here to mind your own business and be horny, but I have no idea where else to ask- I’m a cis woman who finds forcemasc really appealing, but I have mixed feelings about interacting with it because it seems to be a really T4T genre and I don’t want to disrespect anyone. Do you think it’s okay for cis women to be into it, or should I keep searching for a different similar label?

I find that masculinization kinks are really niche, so I’ve had trouble finding a label if you’re not a lesbian or are only interested in being hyper-masculine in the bedroom.

Howdy there,

I say anyone can to be into forcemasc. If cis men can be into sissification/forcefem stuff while not being trans, I think it’s only fair the opposite exist.

I think its mainly T4T stuff because trans dudes seem to be the epicenter of content and we like what we like. I would love for forcemasc to be as mainstream and popular as forcedfem, and think it would do really good to raise trans dudes and ftm content to the equal popularity of mtf and sissy content. This is just my opinion, but I think that any trans dude that says this kink only is only for a certain demographic is thinking backwards, so I say don’t worry.

What you mean by label I’m not sure, you can say you have a hypermasculinity kink. You can say you’re into forcemasc, it’s up to you to decide how far you take it. It doesn’t have to be a 24/7 fetish like a lot of content explores. It can be in the bedroom only and I think that’s a very interesting concept to explore in terms of loving masculinity and freeing it from the toxic societal cage it has.

You’re a cis woman and want to be the man in bed? Be the fucking man! You’re straight too? Make that guy your f****t! Make him call you daddy and say he loves your cock and enjoy how good it makes you feel. Or whatever Dominatrixes do that all the time just differently. And they’re still ladies outside of sex.

°˖⋆.°𓃗 .°˖⋆ °˖⋆.°˖⋆ *gallops away*

[do-you-ship-it-polls]

I am the first anon who posted about misandry. Thank you for your answer, I understand better why you posted this banner.

I just want to make a distinction between what I'd call feminist misandry and TERF misandry.

My friends are the farthest you can imagine from TERF (a lot of them are even trans). They are misandric because a lot have suffered from cis-men. For them, misandry is a protective instinct: if you meet a group of cis-men, be careful.

They hate cis-men as an oppressive group. They don't take a essentialistic view of masculinity, but a sociological one. Men are a group of power, that can abuse it, and they will protect each other. And of course, they don't include trans women in it. (A lot of the feel waaaaay safer with trans women than cis men).

That has nothing to do with TERFs, who use misandry to say "trans women are oppressors" or "trans women are essentially men"

Anyway, I understand the desire to piss off terfs and radfems. But I'd be sad if the word "misandry" was appropriated by them.

Sorry to bring that discourse, and thank you for the clarification!

genuinely don't understand why people are so deadset on identifying themselves as bigots who think 50% of humanity is out to get them. like, being against the patriarchy means you're a feminist or anti-sexist or ideally just a normal person but idk how many people agree. irrational hatred of men is not the same as wanting to knock the patriarchy down, all it does is just: be irrational hatred against men. when there's discussions like this, it also verges on "trans men aren't real men" territory because for some people, they are the exception. until they go on T and dress in a masculine way, then they're too cis man-like to participate in queer spaces (dunno how common it is, but it does happen!)

english isn't my first language, nor have I grown up in an american culture, so I wonder if it's my use of the word misandry that sets people off? like, is that a loaded word? because the definition of misandry is simply "hatred against men". it doesn't mean you feel uncomfortable with men or are scared of them, it means you hate men. I never thought that I would get so much shit for saying that it's weird to have such a deep, blind hatred for half of humanity. I don't think the word can be appropriated my radfems/terfs because there's nothing to be taken out of context, it means the same thing for anyone who uses the word.

why not just call yourself a feminist, an anti-sexist person, an anti-patriarchy person, etc etc. why do you label yourself as a person who hates all men for being born men and no matter what they do, they can never become a good person because they were born as men? I'm genuinely so baffled. not that anyone is planning on changing their mind about this, atleast not me.

thanks to the comments and asks that confirm to me that I'm not crazy for thinking this lol. also, I'm just some guy behind the screen. you can unfollow, block me, ask me to remove your submissions from the queue, whatever.

Just a fun side note, you know who started this discourse in the first place? All of this about transandrophobia and misandry?

little chihiro over on my queer blog... (I really liked the headcanon so if the person who submitted them sees this, i'm not saying it's your fault at all) just funny that it's this little cute character.

I should probably stop answering asks about his now.