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the cardio machine i want is on the cardio machine
cw: gym rat toji x loser!gf - size kink, sweat kink (?), toji is a big old meanie. loser!gf series: geto gojo nanami.
loser!reader who, like a million other sedentary people on new year’s eve, said “new year new me” and proceeded to enroll at the local gym.
gym rat!toji who knew how things are in the beginning of the year, so the first week he arrives one hour earlier than usual to avoid all the lazy fucks that won’t last two months.
of course he makes a few mental bets on the ones that would quit and how long it would take, you included.
it’s easy to spot the “i don’t want lift weights cause i don’t want look jacked” type of girl.
at the breaks between one set and the other he looked around, not surprised to see you slowing down the treadmill after running not even two whole minutes.
sometimes he caught you staring at him through the mirror, not an uncommon occurrence amonst the women there, though you surprised him one day by tapping his shoulder after he finishing his weighted squats.
“can you… give me a few tips?” he looked so intimidated, from up close his shoulders looked like a wall, he stared at you from above, dark green eyes seemed to be heavily judging you, “never mind this was a bad idea, sorry” you turned around, grabbing you bottle and running off the gym.
by the time you managed to gather the courage to show your face back there two whole weeks had passed.
“consistency is the key you know” you were distracted looking down your phone while slowly walking the treadmill when the handsome man appeared beside you, the sudden presence destabilized you.
before you could become the viral video of the week when inevitably a gym employee decides to post the security footage of your ass rolling off the active treadmill, toji wrapped one big arm around your waist and pulled you to the stable floor.
“you caught me off guard the other day” he said completely unfazed by saving you from a life of embarrassment, “then you disappeared.”
“yeah i didn’t know if i wanted to come back anyways, i haven’t see any results so far” you pulled the hem of your shirt down.
toji snorted, “‘course you ain’t seeing results, sweetheart, you don’t lift.”
“well, it’s hard…” toji rolled his eyes, there was always an excuse.
though he also did a new year’s resolution of being more patient, for his kids primarily but teaching a cute thing like you could be a good exercise too.
soon enough, toji was correcting your form, texting you asking why you haven’t showed up to the gym and ringing your bell incessantly when you complained about muscle pain and said you wouldn't go that day.
“it’ll feel better once you start to move” he explained, resting on your door frame when you opened the door on your pajamas.
“let me alone, just today” you whined.
“you asked for my help now go put on something without cartoons on it” he waited for you to turn around and slapped your butt. it had been only one week he was coaching you but there was already a weird intimacy due to the fact he was pretty much always looking at your body and touching you.
to correct your form. obviously.
"what do i have to do today, coach fushiguro?" you asked from your bedroom through an ajar door which allowed toji to get a peek at your pink underwear and cute ass.
"cardio, bicycle first. get some blood flowing on those sore muscles" he tilted his head and raised his eyebrows watching you bend over to grab a biker shorts at the lowest drawer then holding back a laughter at the grunt of pain coming from you.
"once it gets better i can teach you other types of cardio" he walked around your kitchen examining your cabinets and stuff you kept in your fridge. needless to say it was all junk.
"can't wait" you replied sarcastically, failing to understand the meaning.
it took a few more days till you got used to toji's training, then he decided to focus on your upper body.
"such a simple movement, how do you manage to get that wrong?" he raised from the bench he was sitting behind you watching your form through the mirror. you almost dropped the weights at your feet when he came close. it was almost scary how much bigger than you he was especially seeing it throght the mirror. his right hand wrapped around yours on the dumbell and his bicep touched your arm as he pushed your arm closer to your body, "tuck your elbows in, straight your back" his free hand pushed your shoulders till they were touching his chest.
how come he smelled so good, so... musky and...
"are you even making any force?" he lowered his head, his reflection looking annoyed. so you decided to ignore the sudden heat between your thighs and flex your arm the way he taught you.
and just like he promised, when you were consistent enough and handling a good 5 minute run he decided to show you a more pleasing cardio.
"toji please~" you whined, thighs burning from riding him, you were using his rock hard abdomen as a support, but still.
"one more minute, come on" he looked at the watch on his wrist and slapped your ass, "haven't i prep-ed you good enough?" his thumb rubbed your bottom lip then pushed in meeting your tongue, where you tasted yourself in his digits one hour after he ringed your bell and said he was going to reward your good discipline, but he had to strech you first.
"good girl" you felt his abdomn flex when he raised from his laying position on your bed, "now leave it to daddy" he pecked your lips and quickly changed positions, putting a pillow under your ass and rolling his neck to start his cardio of the day.
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.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𝕲UESS ᝰ! CHAPTER TWELVE
synopsis: katseye lucked out when their team managed to score a-list award-winning actress, y/n l/n to be featured in their upcoming music video for ‘touch’. when the cameras turn off and the doors close, lara feels a little more than just onscreen chemistry with her music video love interest.
RECOMMENDED READ; It’s their first date, come on.
When Lara slammed her car door shut, the last thing she expected was to hear frantic—and somewhat aggressive—yelling from beyond the gates of your LA condo.
She had just come from a very interesting dinner with Megan, whom she swore on all the Gods was more excited for her hangout with you than she was. And parked outside by the sidewalk of the address you sent her, she peered at the lavish gates to what she could see was a modern, slick home. She couldn’t make out what was being desperately shouted out, but she could tell there were two voices—two very familiar voices. And as two no as she felt listening in on the argument, she couldn’t help but worry as it grew louder.
Lara hated when things felt tense, she really did, and that’s coming from a person who thrives in chaos.
She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but she knew her ability to stay professional wouldn’t last long with y/n. Earlier that day when she would wipe the tears from your cheeks as you caught your breath, she couldn’t help but feel her head ache. It made her wonder if her friends—as much as it gutted her to admit—had a point. The girls’ teasing was usually bearable, but it was getting somewhat intolerable, the way they seemed so convinced she had a “thing” for the actress. They were so deprived of the drama they were used to stirring on Dream Academy, Lara told herself, I’m just their scapegoat for now.
She reached your gate, pushing it open easily. Seeing what looked to be Avantika’s McLaren parked right at the mouth of the driveway. Her eyes followed the stone road leading through a well-groomed garden of seasonal flowers, up to where light shone from the front of the house just out of view.
She walked around towards the front door, raising an eyebrow as the sound of arguing grew more coherant. At the sight of a familiar head of h/c hair, her eyes widened.
She immediately hid, her body stiff and shoulders tense.
Oh shit, you’re arguing. It’s you and Avantika, arguing. Fuck, did you see her peeking? She’s so stupid. Why the fuck would either of you want someone walking in on the two of you arguing? Oh my God, you were crying… Who would ever, in good conscience, make such a pretty woman cry-Goddammit, Lara, what’re you thinking? Get a fucking grip!
“I don’t want to play this game anymore, Avantika, it’s fucking exhausting! You call me over late at night and then you spit me out when you’re done with me,” your voice cracked, the back of your hands wiping the corners of your eyes. “Just fuck off, okay? Leave me alone and don’t text me again.”
“Why’re you being so hysterical? All I wanted to do was talk, it’s not my fault I’m getting called in!” Avantika scoffed with a smirk, shaking her head. “You’re an actor too, for fuck’s sake, I’ve always prided you in the fact we got each other’s jobs.”
“Oh my God, just go ‘do your job’, I don’t care,” you sniffed.
“Fuck, you’re so fucking frustrating,” Avantika grunted, grabbing your wrist when you turned to walk into your house, “Where are you going, we’re not fucking done here.”
"...L-Let go, Avantika," you stuttered, “Fuck, just stop!”
"Why do you like fighting me so much? I just want to be with you and you’re always shitting ok me got this and that." Avantika snapped back, her hands gesturing wildly. "Is this really how you talk to me? I love you."
You flinched, the sudden aggression making you tense.
Lara didn’t think. She immediately jumped from where she hid, eyes narrowing as she saw Avantika’s grip on you tighten. Without a second thought, Lara moved forward, shoving Avantika back hard. The force made Avantika stumble, her eyes wide in shock. “Dude, what the fuck are you doing?”
"Lara?" Avantika gasped, a mix of confusion and anger in her voice as she straightened up. “What’re you even doing here, this isn’t any of your business.”
Lara stood her ground, her fists clenched, her chest rising and falling with the sudden rush of adrenaline. "It’s my fucking business when you’re getting physical. Is this why you kept asking me about the shoot? ‘Cuz you should’ve told me you’ve been seeing my fucking costar,” she stuck her tongue into her inner-cheek, “What’re you doing, Tika?”
Avantika blinked, her surprise clear. "I’m chatting with my girlfriend, whom you’re standing in my view of.”
Lara didn’t break eye contact, her gaze fierce as she kept a protective stance in front of Y/N. "I was gonna come tell y/n a message from my management,” she lied, “I don’t know what’s gotten into you, Tika, but you’re acting like a fucking lunatic. And I’m not letting you treat her like this."
Avantika stared at her for a moment, then sighed sharply, almost as if realizing she wasn’t going to win this argument. She glanced down at her phone, which buzzed insistently. Her manager was calling again. "I—" she started, but then looked back at Lara with a tight expression. "Whatever, I’m late to my reshoot,” she glanced past Lara’s shoulder at a sniffling you, who stared back in terror, “We’ll continue this later.”
Lara didn’t move until she could no longer hear the car’s exhaust roaring as she sped down the street. Only then did she turn to you, the tension in her shoulders slowly relaxing.
“Are you okay?” she asked, “What the fuck was that?”
You nodded, tossing your head back to flip your hair away. You shot her a smile, as if your eyes weren’t brimming with tears and your cheeks weren’t flushed with emotion. You inhaled deeply, finally meeting her weary eyes. Your wrist still tingling from Avantika’s iron grip, relieved to have Lara intervene. "Yeah… it’s nothing. We just got caught in the moment.”
Lara wasn’t convinced. You were still shaking.
But she knew not to press, just like she didn’t when she caught you crying after lunch earlier that day. So Lara let it be. She just nodded, her hands tucked into her pockets, her stance relaxed but ready. After a beat of silence, she spoke again, her tone light. “You want to get out of here? I came to make things up to you, but I get it if you’re not feeling up to it anymore.”
You shook your head, hand reaching out to lightly grab at her arm. You watched her head dart down at the contact, her arm tensing into a flex. “No, I want to, just—let me grab my jacket.”
The drive to the diner was quiet, filled with the low hum of the car engine and the low sound of Lara’s playlist. You kept your gaze fixed on the world outside, watching the streetlights blur past, their glow softening the edges of everything. Lara didn’t say much, didn’t push, and for that, you were grateful. The silence between you wasn’t heavy or uncomfortable; it was soothing, like a balm for the rawness left behind by Avantika.
Oddly enough, you figured it would be awkward in some fashion, but you didn’t realize how little time you truly had to sit and appreciate silence the way you did with Lara. That’s how you knew, despite her initially negative approach to your (professional) relationship.
When the neon lights of a diner came into view, a small sigh of relief escaped your lips. Lara pulled into a parking spot, cutting the engine before glancing over at you. Her expression was gentle, her eyes filled with an understanding that didn’t need words. “Have you ever been here before?”
You glanced out the window, eyebrows furrowing at the unfamiliar exterior of the diner, shaking your head.
“Well, when I was still training, I would take my friends out here all the time for a break.” She unbuckled her seat belt, eyeing the diner. “They have, arguably, the best milkshakes in all of LA. I mean. I’m talking smooth and sweet blended ice cream with little chunks of strawberry and chocolate in them.”
You raised an eyebrow, your lips quirking into a smile at her reaction. “Really? How have I not heard of this place before?”
She smirked, “Only the real VIPs get to know this place.”
She popped her door open, “Come on.” She jogged over to your side, but you had already opened your door. Still, she insisted on closing it as you stepped towards the diner. The tiny bell above the door rung when you stepped in, and she shot the man stood at the register a quick wave before she guided you towards a booth. You made note of the warm hand on the small of your back as she gestured for you to take a seat. She plopped opposite to you.
The diner was warm, its retro charm wrapping around you like a duvet of nostalgia. Red leather booths lined the walls, and a jukebox in the corner played soft tunes from a bygone era.
Across from you, Lara watched you closely, searching your eyes for signs of tears. She felt her chest tighten at the redness around them, but once you glanced back up at her through your lush lashes, she felt her worries flush away. She followed your movements, her eyes softening as they traced the subtle tremor in your fingers. You caught her watching, and for a moment, you felt exposed. But Lara didn’t look away or make you feel self-conscious. Instead, she smiled, just a small curve of her lips that seemed to say, I see you, and it’s okay.
The waitress came, notepad in hand, and Lara let you order first. “Strawberry milkshake, please,” you ordered with a small smile, your voice soft. The waitress smiled back.
“Amazing choice, honey. What can I get you, Lara, dear?”
“The usual’s good, Jen. Can’t go wrong with a good chocolate delight.” Lara chuckled, earning a nice pinch to the cheek.
“Good to see you back, Lara, we’ve missed you. Just ‘cuz you’re all famous now doesn’t mean you can forget us squares, eh?” Jen brushed off Lara’s dismissive wave. She glanced between the two of you, shoving her pen and pad back into her apron. “Now, I won’t impose on your date. I’ll be right back with your orders… What’s your name, honey?”
You swallowed, waiting for Lara to correct the woman’s assumption. She didn’t. “y/n.”
“Well, y/n. You’ve hit the jackpot with this one.”
Once the waitress left, Lara leaned forward slightly, her elbows resting on the table, her fingers loosely intertwined. She watched you with a quiet intensity, not the kind that made you want to shrink away, but the kind that made you feel seen, like you mattered. She didn’t address the waitress’ words, which seemed to bug you—it made you wonder how many times she has had dates here where you sat.
“You like strawberry?” she murmured, almost to herself, but loud enough for you to hear. There was something in her tone, something warm and gentle, as if she was cataloging this small detail about you like it was something precious.
You nodded, unsure of what to say. You felt naked before her, for this woman—a woman you had only known for a week—because she’s seen a side to you only your closest friends would know. It wasn’t just the fact you liked strawberry; Lara seemed to notice everything—the way your shoulders sagged just a little, the way your eyes flicked to the window when you felt overwhelmed, the way you traced circles on the table with your finger when you were lost in thought.
“Y’know, for years I’ve known Avantika, and I’ve never heard her mention a girlfriend once,” Lara began, careful to tread the topic lightly. “She’s one of my best friends, but… she’s always had a short temper. I’m sorry.”
Why was she apologizing? This was so out of character.
“No, it’s fine. We just,” you paused, “We’ve never really told anybody about us… she insisted on keeping things out of the public eye to protect us. But we’re not here to talk about that, right? You didn’t need to ‘make it up to me’ or whatever, it’s been my pleasure being able to work with you both.”
She scoffed, “Absolutely not. Y’know the amount of fire I’ve had to take from Sophia and Dani? The girls are so in love with you, I figured if I could get to know you better, I would too.”
Well, there’s a flutter. Where did the Lara you knew go?
“I had a lot of fun today. I didn’t think I could enjoy fake-riding a motorcycle that much,” you joked, earning a laugh from her.
“Yeah, well, I’m glad I was your partner, doll. Full disclosure, none of the others would have made it that fun.” She whispered, before leaning back into the booth. You laughed, feeling yourself ease into the conversation. “Y’know, I love your smile much more than you crying. Don’t get me wrong, you end modelling careers everyday, but that smile,” she pointed at you grinning softly, “That’s why the world’s in love with you.”
How could she say such things so casually? You’ve been trained your whole life to mask your emotions, to show a different level of self to deceive the cameras. But you couldn’t help the genuine smile that cracked on your features.
The milkshakes arrived, tall glasses with whipped cream and a cherry on top. You took a tentative sip, the sweetness grounding you. Lara watched you, a soft smile playing on her lips as she did the same.
“Don’t be shy,” she said after a while, her voice gentle. “Try it out. I wanna know what you think.”
You took a sip of your milkshake, your eyes widening at the silky texture. “Oh my God.” was all you could utter.
“Good, right?” You nodded, swallowing the mouthfuls after mouthfuls of milkshake. “When I saw you and the girls went out for boba, I knew you’d appreciate a sweet treat.”
After a while, the milkshakes were gone, the diner settling into a peaceful quiet. You and Lara didn’t talk about a lot, mostly about your career and the day you had with her bandmates. By the end, you reached for your wallet, but Lara quickly fought to leave a few bills on the table and stood, waiting patiently for you to slide out of the booth and join her.
The walk back to the car was quiet, the cool night air kissing your cheeks. To your surprise, Lara opened the passenger door for you, her movements easy and unhurried, as if she had all the time in the world for you. You climbed in, murmuring a quiet “thanks” before she shut the door and rounded the car to the driver’s side. As she started the engine, the soft hum filled the silence between you again. Lara didn’t rush to fill the quiet, instead letting it stretch comfortably as she pulled out of the diner’s parking lot and onto the road. The city’s glow was a faint shimmer in the distance, and the streets were mostly empty, giving the world a hushed, almost sacred feel.
Lara’s hands rested easily on the steering wheel, her fingers tapping lightly to an unheard rhythm. Every so often, she glanced over at you, her gaze lingering just long enough to make sure you were okay. You felt the weight of her attention, not oppressive but gentle, like a soft blanket on a cold night.
“You sure you’re alright?” she asked quietly, her voice barely above a whisper as if she didn’t want to break the delicate calm that had settled in the car.
You nodded, your eyes fixed on the passing streetlights. “Yeah. I’m... I’m better now.”
In her company, you hadn’t thought of Avantika once since you entered the diner. You didn’t think it was possible to have a breath of fresh air like that, to be able to just have her plague your thoughts like the parasite she was. But Lara made it possible. The city lights gave way to quieter streets, the houses familiar as you neared yours. Lara’s car slowed as she turned onto your block, finally pulling up into your driveway.
She shifted the car into park but didn’t turn off the engine. Instead, she leaned back slightly, one hand resting on the steering wheel while the other dropped to her lap. Her gaze softened as she looked at you.
“You know,” she started, her tone light but sincere, “If you ever… run into trouble again, you have my number.” She didn’t say it explicitly, but you both knew what she was talking about. “I’m one call away, I’ll knock some sense into her.”
You nodded, your fingers fiddling with the hem of your coat.
“Thanks, Lara,” you murmured, glancing up at her. “For the offer and for tonight. I appreciate it. Really.”
Her smile widened just a bit, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “Of course, doll. What kind of fake girlfriend would I be if I didn’t take good care of you?”
You swore you thought she was flirting. And much different to how you first approached her, you felt yourself be the one getting flustered. For a moment, neither of you moved, the stillness in the car filled with something warm and unspoken. Lara’s eyes searched yours, not for answers but for understanding, making sure you knew she was someone you could lean on, even if it took time for you to open up.
Finally, you reached for the door handle, pausing as you glanced back at her. “I’ll see you friday?”
Lara nodded, her voice soft. “See you friday.”
You turned back to wave slightly before heading into your house. You hear her car pull out the driveway, feeling for the first time in a long while you could relax. And it was because Lara was there, not fixing everything, but simply being there, offering you the space to heal in your own time.
next. 𝜗𝜚⋆₊˚ masterlist.
author’s note: where are my lara y/n truthers rn…
taglist: @vivilvr @1luvkarina @meiphobic @yeetaberry127 @lafortezalover @lararajjj @kristalag @meizinisnumberone @vrtualstar @jaythegirlkisser @arihiu @cassiespoiler @nyssalvr @hazel-tanthamore22 @kathleenmikaelson @taikabui @wtfisthisnoclueman @onlyyou-metanoia @yjiminswallet @firstclassjaylee @xochitlisbest @saysirhc @sunshinez4 @fruityg0rl @urmom2314 @cceanvvaves @bowforgodjihyo @blushmimi @justtluvrr @ssamlovr @peanutbutterlover05 @yazzyminny @karli6 @fillthwvoid @urfriendlylocalidiot (taglist open!)
#katseye smau#katseye x reader#katseye#lara raj x reader#lara raj#daniela avanzini#daniela avanzini x reader#manon bannerman#manon bannerman x reader#megan skiendiel#megan skiendiel x reader#sophia laforteza x reader#sophia laforteza#jeong yoonchae
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Danny did a little interview for AARP Magazine in December. I haven't seen it copied anywhere past the paywall and I enjoyed reading it, so wanted to repost here
(Article is pasted as text below the cut)
Noisemaker I was born in Asbury Park, New Jersey. I was the baby, my sister Theresa was 10 years older, my sister Angie was 16 years older, my mom had two sisters, and none of them shut up, ever. It’s an Italian family, so the decibel level is out there. A little smart aleck I went to Our Lady of Mount Carmel School, because if your mother and father didn’t know what to do with you, they gave you to the nuns. … and still a smart aleck I remember when Peter, my nephew, was born. I was 7 years old, and I went over and looked into the bassinet, and the first thing he did was pee on me. It was great! I don’t think there’s a conversation I’ve had with the guy over all these years where I don’t bring up the fact that he peed on me. Also an old softie Do anything you can to keep on an even keel with your family and friends, no matter what happens in your life. That’s all we have. Don’t hide things. You’ve got to get up every day thinking about how you’re going to make it easier for the people that you’re working with or that you love or that you eat breakfast with. Because it’s infectious; everybody starts feeling good. Falling into the business Growing up, I’d spend the weekends at the movies, but I actually wasn’t even thinking about doing it. I got introduced to the American Academy of Dramatic Arts in a roundabout way, took a couple classes, and I got the bug. And I thought, I’m not like Cary Grant, but I got a feel for this thing. So I studied, and then I went and started looking for jobs in New York, like every other actor does. I didn’t care what the description was—“male, 6 foot 4, 250 pounds”—I’d go out for the audition. Once I got in the room, I’m going to do what I’m going to do. Becoming Louie I wanted that part, Louie DePalma [in Taxi]. I walked into the room to audition in front of the four guys who created it, and I said, “One thing I want to know before we start. Who wrote this shit?” And I threw the script on the table. And I had a nanosecond of, did I screw everything up? Then they fell on the floor. Louie walked into their lives. Sudden fame I went to the market the day after the first episode aired, and people are stopping me on the street: “Hey, Louie!” They weren’t calling me Danny. After a couple of days of this, I called my publicist, and said, “This is really crazy. People are chasing me down the street.” He says, “Danny, you don’t have to worry until that stops happening.” Now it’s all, “Frank, Frank, Frank!” because of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, which is good. The fans are all you have. Still evolving I think I’m bolder than I’ve ever been—I don’t monitor myself as much. I do say things that are, like, pretty far out, that are really weird, and sometimes I’m inappropriate. But I am always respectful, and that’s because of my two sisters, I swear to God. You have to respect other people’s space.
My happy place Since my two grandbabies have been born, I am just in- corrigible. You gotta tamp me down in the joy department, you know what I’m saying? I’m just so lucky. Blessings have been showered down on me. I wish that for everybody.And the thing is to be aware of it. Don’t let it go. Rhea [Perlman, DeVito’s wife, from whom he is separated but with whom he still spends a lot of time] and I were always able to see those little, incremental changes when our kids were growing up. And I tell my kids that, with their babies: Don’t miss a thing, don’t look away. A sudden case of holidays I’m in the movie A Sudden Case of Christmas with my daughter Lucy, who plays my daughter. It’s just a real warm, wonderful movie, and I loved doing it. As far as the actual holidays go, we have family dinners. Basically we’re Italian, so you know, anybody who’s around, we grab. We get to celebrate all the holidays, because Rhea’s parents were Jewish, so we did all the Jewish holidays, and we do all the Catholic holidays or Italian holidays. My mantra It’s always a good thing to be positive about life, and always get out of bed thinking today’s the day you’re really going to kick its ass. That’s the way to do it
#i hope its legible in photo form#i had to torrent this whole magazine to read it#and then just screencapped it so#not the best quality but you get the picture#the piss story took me out#like ofc#danny devito
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HGSN 33-2
Chapter (Japanese)
(Please hit the green thumbs up at the end of the Japanese chapter to show support)
Rough translation by me
P1
Asako: The hamster's scared...
Tanaka: Ah... She's very sensitive, so this place must be rough for her...
(sfx: rattle)
P2
(sfx: whoosh)
(sfx: thwack!)
(sfx: thwack!)
(sfx: thwack!)
(sfx: thwack!)
Asako: What's that?
Tanaka: A barrier. It's only for our peace of mind though
P2
Tanaka: What we are going to do now is negotiate with the impurity in this house to close the hole for us
Tanaka: The original resident of this house seemed to have...enshrined something here. So it should still be inside.
Asako: If we negotiate, will it actually close the hole for us?
(sfx: stick)
Asako: Ah! Whoa! What's that?
P4
Tanaka: A threat towards the impurity
Asako: A threat...
Tanaka: Well, I'm sure it won't go easily. This isn't an exorcism, it's only an equal trade.
Tanaka: Since you're here, we can communicate. That'll make things a bit easier
Tanaka: Our voices will reach the impurities, so all you have to do is interpret what the impurity is saying
(sfx: nod nod)
P5
Asako: Um...Mister, are you always doing such dangerous stuff? You aren't a medium or anything, right?
Asako: Then, who exactly are you...?
Tanaka: Mm...I wonder...
Tanaka: The employee of an exploitative company,...I guess... Hahaha
Asako: Wah...
P6
(sfx: taiko drums)
(sfx: rushing water)
--
P7
Maki: Gn...Ah...
Yoshiki: Maki!!
Maki: Huh?
Rie: Are you alright!?
-
Maki: What? I'm still in danger?
Maki: And I took cleaning the shrine seriously too!
Rie: Maki-kun, listen carefully.
P8
Rie: We're going to do something about the origin of the "legs", but when that happens, Maki-kun, you might be pulled towards it too.
Rie: I'll protect you, but be prepared.
Hikaru: Me and him are gonna do something about the source, so all you have to do is last through the night
Maki: You guys are talking like psychics or something all of a sudden...and it feels like something about you guys has changed? ...well, no matter
Maki: I'll give you this
P9
Hikaru: Oh, good
Maki: It's an amulet from my grandpa.
Yoshiki: A white rope?
Maki: It's made with the rare fur of a serow
Maki: Apparently if you have it, the serow will come help you out. Just in case, I've been carrying it around everyday.
Yoshiki: Is it really okay? To borrow something that seems so important...
Maki: I mean, this is about all I can actually do, you know? (haha)
Maki: And I just had the weirdest dream...I've got a bad feeling about this.
==
Extra (link):
Q. Aren't there a lot of people who can sense spirits in this area?
A. It's because spiritual senses are inherited.
It's possible that the people who can sense spirits in this area are all descended from the same ancestor.
Hikaru: Huh! Is that also the reason there's so many people with naturally curly hair?
When it's the impurity that's making contact, ordinary people like Yoshiki will also see them.
==
T/N: The text of the talisman on Asako's head seems to be a "counter-sorcery" incantation from a Chinese Buddhist text called the Foshuo zhoumei jing (佛説咒魅經).
Unfortunately, I couldn't really find any accessible English translation or much more info on it online, so I'll just leave it at that.
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Between love and madness .ᐟ
.ᐟ Synopsis: you guys also like that trope where: character A is in a relationship with character B, but character A doesn't value character B, until character B gets tired and decides to move away, but suddenly character A starts trying to win back character B and without anyone noticing this ends up becoming an obsession with character B? ‘cause I love it!!
.ᐟ Character: Childe/Ajax/Tartaglia
.ᐟ Warnings: Yandere tendencies, stalking, obsessive behavior, invasion of privacy (?)
notes: childe is such a fun character to write •ᴗ•
𓍼 At first, you thought he didn't want to be in a relationship, after all, he always acted like he didn't want to be in one.
You were the one who always texted him, you were the one who always invited him on dates - which he always made some excuse not to go to - you were the one who always started a conversation when you two were together. You gave everything you had and more only to never get anything back.
The last time you tried was when you sent him a text asking if the two of you could go together to the ice cream shop that had opened near your school, surprisingly, he said yes, he would meet you there as soon as he finished with whatever it was he was doing.
You believed that this time he would go, only to be left standing there, alone, for hours.
That day, it was like something clicked in your head. All the times you tried came flooding back, and you didn't feel angry or hurt, you were just disappointed, and you decided to stop trying. You didn't say anything to Childe, and you didn't even intend to. To him, it It was as if what you two had didn't even exist, so he wouldn't notice if you stopped. Maybe he would be happy when he realized.
You were like a guardian angel, always around Childe, so when he woke up the next day without a single message from you, he thought it was strange, but it wasn't something he gave much importance to. At school, when he saw you and you didn't even try to get closer like you always did, he was confused. Was it because of yesterday? He just forgot, you didn't need to get so mad about it.
For the first time, he started paying more attention to you during the day. You two were in the same class, he expected that during breaks between classes, you would turn to talk to him, but you kept your back to him the whole time. You didn't wait for him to leave, you didn't invite him anywhere, you didn't send him any more messages. Nothing.
You still talked normally with your friends, you smiled at them and hugged them when you were going to say goodbye. He even heard you talking to them about the movie they all agreed to watch together at your house this weekend…
But what about him?
Childe didn't know exactly why he felt so uncomfortable, why were you leaving him aside so suddenly?
He had also agreed to go out with his friends that night, but that idea wasn't as fun anymore. Didn't you care about being with him anymore?
When the days went by and he realized that your behavior wouldn't change, he tried to get closer. It was as if the switch that had turned off in you had turned on in Childe.
In high school, when you saw him standing at the entrance talking to his group of friends, you tried to get closer to at least say “hi”. Now, you always walked right past him, so he decided to come to you.
When you felt a hand on your wrist, you turned around instantly, only to find Childe’s smiling face beside you. You frowned, not a single word coming out of your mouth, you didn’t know what to say.
“You’re going to class, right?” He asked, still with that friendly smile on his face. And without even waiting for your answer, he added: “I’m going with you.”
What the hell…?
“Fine…” You replied, your eyebrows still furrowed, revealing your confusion at his sudden action. You were so confused that you didn’t even try to smile back at him, and he noticed.
Inside the classroom, he would often call you, trying to start a conversation with silly conversations or saying that he had doubts about some question in class. It was the first time that he didn't prefer to join the group of people at the back of the classroom to do anything other than study, so you knew that he didn't care at all about the questions he called you for help with.
The days passed, and the lack of your attention not only bothered Childe, but consumed him. He couldn't understand how you had simply erased him from your life so easily, so indifferently. For someone who always seemed to revolve around him, it was inconceivable that you were now able to move on without even looking back.
At first, he kept trying subtly: getting closer to the classroom, starting a conversation, trying to rekindle what he thought still existed. But your coldness, your distance, became a wall that he couldn't climb. And that only made something grow inside him. An unbearable need. An obsession.
When you laughed with your friends, he couldn’t look away. When you left the room, he noticed the rhythm of your steps, the path you took. He began to memorize the times you went to the cafeteria or the library. And without even realizing it, he began to adjust his routine to match yours.
At first, it was just observation. He wanted to understand. He wanted to know what you did, what you liked, who you talked to. But it didn’t take long for it to become more invasive. He started following you to places. When you walked home, he made sure to walk in the same direction, keeping a safe distance.
One time, he saw you leave the house at night, probably to meet your friends. He should have been with his friends, but instead, he followed you, hidden in the shadows. He saw you enter a cafe and sit with a group. And while you laughed and seemed genuinely happy, he felt something strange—a mix of anger and sadness. How could you look so good without him?
And then the messages came. At first, they were sporadic, trying to make conversation. When you didn’t respond, he sent another. And another. “Are you okay?” “I saw you today, you looked beautiful.” “Why don’t you talk to me?”
You tried to ignore it, but the messages started arriving at odd times. In the early hours of the morning, when you were sleeping, or even when you were in class. Messages like: “Who were you with at the park yesterday?” or “I saw you changed your haircut, it looks nice.”
That’s when you realized something was wrong. He was starting to cross the line.
One day, when you opened your locker at school, you found a note. It was simple but direct: “You can’t ignore me forever.” There was no signature, but you knew exactly who had put it there.
You confronted Childe in the hallway, your expression full of anger and confusion. “What are you doing, Ajax? Why are you following me?”
He smiled, but there was something disturbing in the gleam in his eyes. “I just want to take care of you. I don’t want you to get hurt… or for anyone to take you away from me.”
His words sent a chill down your spine. He wasn’t acting like the indifferent person you knew before, but like someone completely different. Someone unstable.
From that day on, things got worse. He started showing up in the places you frequented, even the most unlikely ones. At the ice cream shop, at your front door, at the places you went to study. He always had an excuse ready. “I was nearby.” “I wanted to see you.” “I missed you.”
You blocked his number, but he found other ways. He created new accounts, sent you notes through colleagues, showed up in person. He was insistent, inescapable.
One night, you were at home, alone. While reading a book, you heard something outside the window. A subtle sound, almost imperceptible. When you went closer to look, you saw a familiar shadow. It was him. Standing there, in the garden, looking at you as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
You immediately pulled the curtain back, your heart racing. He picked up his cell phone and thought about calling someone, but before dialing, he sent a message: “No need to be scared. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
You realized then that this was no longer about a boy trying to win your attention back. Childe was becoming a presence you couldn’t control, a constant weight that watched over you and followed you. And somehow, he seemed more and more certain that this was what he had to do.
After all, without realizing it, he had started to make you the most important thing in his world.
tags:
#yandere#obsessive yandere#genshin impact#ajax x reader#childe#dark content#yande.re#childe tartaglia ajax#childe x reader#possesive love
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If it's not too much trouble, do you have headcanons for Kotoko/Monaka? I like to imagine post-canon they work out their issues with each other and get to a much healthier place, like, when they're teenagers. I related a lot to Kokoto's toxic relationship with Monaka, I definitely had relationships like that when I was in elementary school too. It's kind of nice to imagine a world where - whether romantically or platonically - they work out their issues and work out, even if that might not be exactly realistic, aha...
Oh MAN do I have post-canon Warriors of Hope headcanons. I really do love imagining these kids and the lives they lead when they come of age.
I try not to use read mores, but this one got way longer than the usual headcanon posts, and it very much is less "Kotoko/Monaca headcanons" and more "elaborate set-up for how Kotoko and Monaca feel about their crimes as teenagers." So more under the cut I guess!
Firstly, some setup. I love adoptive family relationships, and especially mother/child adoptive relationships. So of course I love daydreaming about Aoi "Bleeding Heart" Asahina adopting Kotoko, and it becoming a Kyoko (or Miaya!)/Hina-parenting-Kotoko, friends-to-moms slowburn. SOMEONE'S adopting these children, and it's not Komaru "I Just Spent A Full Year In Solitary Isolation (:" or the "We Taser Ourselves To Decide Whether The Serial Killer Fronts (:" Fukawas. Hina's upbeat, she keeps it light, and unlike Makoto "Spotless" Naegi, she understands the guilt of attempting/committing mass murder. Kyoko isn't quite any of that but deep in my heart. Through The Power Of Love And Elaborate Metaphors About Her Relationship To Her Father
And I mean. I'm going to be honest. Monaca's, like, 10. She spends three days in space before she goes 1. Wow this sucks 2. I did not in fact prepare enough materials to live like this indefinitely. I'm like 10. I packed enough for about 13 hours and thought I was good Forever. I need more marshmallows.
So it takes Monaca all of half a week to admit her failures and crash land somewhere on earth. The island with the Remnants? Misaki and Takumi? In-universe versions of the V3 students as adults? Personally I'm a fan of Yasuhiro and Kanon adopting her in the world's absolute weirdest fantasy. What matters is SOMEONE finds her. And we get Mod Loves Sappy Adoptive Relationships V2: Now With The Green One.
Because listen. Listen. These are kids. They have committed heinous, unforgivable crimes of extreme ethical concern, and they are also ten years old. Their only frame of ethical reference is a manipulator and abuser so good at what she does that she ended the world. People generally remember this with the other Warriors, but they almost always set it aside for Monaca, so I want to be clear: Monaca Towa is redeemable. Because she was 10 years old, and the moment she was out from under the thumb of the people who taught her how to do these cruel and unusual things, her first plan was Run Away To Space To Escape The Things That Have Happened Here. They're children.
THAT MEANS A LOT OF GUILT. NO ONE HAS EVER NOT BECOME A PUDDLE OF REGRET ABOUT SOMETHING THEY DID IN MIDDLE SCHOOL.
In general, I actually think Kotoko struggles with guilt the least amongst the Warriors. Firstly, I think having a parent who understands and can help her come to grips with what she's done from a very personal place really helps her work through it. But I also think Kotoko is low-empathy in general. I think eventually, she comes to understand intellectually what she's done wrong, but I don't think she ever struggles with the idea that she shouldn't have done it. I think she would be very practical about the circumstances that she was in, and in her mind, well. What else was she supposed to do? She'd been abused all her life. She was up against Junko Enoshima. Obviously what she did was wrong, but any other kid in that situation would've, in Kotoko's mind, done the same.
On the other hand, I believe Monaca would get hit with guilt very intensely once she finally processed everything she'd been through at high-school age, but that she would absolutely keep that under wraps and act as though it was meaningless to her.
Monaca is, in my opinion, a compulsive liar. You can see that in a lot of canonical ways, but I choose to extend it a bit to headcanons - it's not that she Doesn't need a wheelchair, it's that she has days when she needs it and days when she doesn't, and pretending she never needed it at all gives people a huge shock. She didn't plan to not kill herself with the rest of the Warriors as a prank; she really planned to do it, but people look at her when she says that. It's a defensive mechanism, and a method of feeling in control. At least I can choose for them to hate me by lying and being terrible, instead of being hated when I haven't done anything.
So I think, when she is finally faced with the enormity of what she has done, Monaca does what her first instinct is always to do: runs away from it and lies herself into culpability. Of course I killed all those terrible adults, and now that I'm almost their age, I'll just die instead of becoming one of them! That sort of thing. I think she traps herself into her own persona, no matter how hard she tries to improve, because Monaca is a child who internalizes until she breaks.
So when Kotoko and Monaca meet coincidentally at high-school age. Ho boy. Kotoko who still sort-of blames Monaca who blames herself, and neither of them completely aware of how to comfort a person or how to hate a person in a way that isn't lethal...oh the GROWTH. The Strawberry Wine by Deana Carter of it all
#asks#anon#im sorry this wasnt about their relationship it got too long T_T#you can send me another ask if you want me to talk more about their actual interactions as teens! i just started talking about the backstor#and then all of a sudden it was. So Much Text#monakoto#headcanons#monaca towa#kotoko utsugi#udg#dr3#talk to the mod
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it’s so easy to forget that you can literally write whatever you want
#i think especially if you post your writing it’s easy to forget because#sometimes we subconsciously try and write reader as someone who most readers will like#instead of writing reader as#yourself for example#sometimes i feel disconnected from my own reader-insert-guy#you know ?!#i haven’t written anything with me in mind as the reader#i had this sudden realization#just now#as im writing a lil vent-y kind of fic#that i probably won’t end up posting HOWEVER#im writing the reader as myself for the first time and it’s#making me happy today#as for the vent not to worry sbshjsjdkd I’ve had this issue with an irl for a couple months now#tis all okay and well#🐇 — text !#but you can literally write so much. like if you’re nervous for something u could write ur fav offering support#if ur happy u can write them being happy w u! if ur mad u can write them telling someone off for u#u have so much freedom as a writer#love that a lot#on the other hand i can write sakura pouring milk before cereal if i wanted to#i could even make suo do that#cw vent#INCASE
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Muggle college AU where Harry sneaks into tom’s dorm room (after making sure to drug tom’s water earlier ofc) and takes pictures of him while he sleeps and posts them online. because god fucking dammit, Tom riddle is the most annoying RA that could possibly exist, and he wants a little bit of light revenge.
Harry realizes that “light revenge” may have gotten out of hand around the same time he started stripping Tom, and suddenly he was balls deep in both Tom riddle and a felony. The gravity of the situation did nothing to prevent Harry from taking a video, even though it was just more evidence that could be used against Harry.
#i don’t wanna over-work it so have a barely thought out idea!#tomarry#tom riddle#bottom tom riddle#harry potter#non con#somnophilia#I heart somno if you couldn’t tell#cuz like Tom Riddle is such a brat but he can’t be when he’s unconscious !#I also really like the idea that Harry was convinced Tom was stalking him so of course to confirm this he had to stalk Tom back!#(tom was not stalking him)#(he was too busy figuring out how to get away with another murder)#and so harry decides to finally get revenge on Tom for being an asshole (doing his job and confiscating materials not allowed on campus)#by taking embarrassing pictures of him when he’s at his most vulnerable#the idea was that Harry’d post em online somewhere or use it as blackmail#(harry just wanted to jerk off to em)#but all of a sudden harry is having the best sex of his life (it doesn’t matter that tom’s asleep it’s fine) and he doesn’t want this to be#his only night with Tom#so he leaves Tom all messy and used on his dorm bed with a note telling him to check his phone#which has texts from Harry with the video and pics of their night together <3#he used his burner phone tho ofc ;-3#anyways#Tom thinks Harry knows about The Murders (Harry has no clue about The Murders) and freaks out#and eventually offers to let harry fuck him as much as he wants as long as he ‘keeps it secret’#and so starts a horridly fucked up situationship that Tom can’t leave for fear of his murders being exposed#but also he comes to crave these meetings with Harry#meanwhile harry is like the closest thing to a himbo that a stalker can be#he’s just happy to be here (sexually coercing Tom Motherfucking Riddle)#I have many thoughts
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ok actually I have 2 more pointless yapping text posts I need out of my system
1) every day I wake up and I go "I can't deal with this not-actively-playing-a-zelda-game life anymore, I Need to start my next one!" and then I go on here and I see people and their Zelda art and I their Zelda talks and then I come home and stare at the like 5 games I have right now and there is absolutely no way I could pick where to go next.... they're all gonna be amazing... it has to be the perfect time... what if my alttp spark gets taken over before I get my ideas out.... I'm dying to play more Zelda though.....
2) anyone else ever feel like the fact that they learned english on deviantart back in like 2010 is like. a physical feeling. like it's bursting out from within and you have to pull yourself back to at least Try to talk like a real person. use punctuation and stuff. be understandable...
I'm not letting go of him though ➡️ :3c
#text#giving the people on bsky a break and haunting you guys instead#I promise I won't make it a habit though do not worry#I might just play OoA since it won't be committing to too much new... but omg has my picking of a next game been haunting me#I need the time to be perfect for full enjoyment for like all of them bc I'm so excited for all of them#not that there's anything wrong with talking like 2010 ofc!!! I mostly mean the part of it that was borderline incomprehensible#great times though no one needed to understand each other to be besties all of a sudden hfdiuhufds
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I miss my dad.
I miss my aunt.
Today has been so hard.
This weekend has been so hard.
#grief#kiki shouts into the void#this weekend has been so hard#at least with dad we had some time to come to terms. to say goodbye#this was so sudden#we were supposed to talk on the phone yesterday#she was gonna visit after thanksgiving#which#while sometimes it was fraught#it didn’t matter#none of that fucking mattered#i would let her rearrange my room to her heart’s content#i’d let her talk to me however she wanted#just to have her talk again at all#i have shawls that are half done for her. yarn that was earmarked for her#we had a pile of presents waiting to be sent#saved for christmas#had sent them a subscription box of fun things to eat.#it arrived there sat#we texted almost every day in the family group chat#i keep pulling up our thread to share something anf then i remember#i went to share a knitting project with her#and i can’t#we had plans to see a show in jan#we had plans for camping in the summer#that is going to be so hard#there were bad times. yes. some things were very difficult sometimes.#but i also laughed so much. and even if things were difficult she was ALWAYS in my corner#i’m just. so sad rn#i miss her
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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i keep getting hit with these like. weird waves of sadness over liam's passing yesterday?? a big chunk of what shaped me as a person during my teenage years is gone and it's such a weird and sad feeling.
i don't really have the words to describe how i feel about this (well, i do, but they're not like. brief. or clear). the liam payne i'm sad about losing was gone awhile ago, i know that, but part of me always hoped he would get to receive the professional help he so clearly needed.
anyone who was obsessed with one direction knew that liam really lost his way and fell into addiction almost immediately after the band broke up. he's needed help for years. he did go to rehab awhile back and started to heal a bit but clearly things got bad again.
i'm aware that death does not make someone innocent. you are allowed to be surprised and sad by the tragic loss of a life while also holding them accountable for the shitty things they've done. those two things can and should coexist. i know the internet is allergic to nuance but PLEASE exercise some critical thinking and perspective. this is not as black and white as it seems to be on the surface. keep in mind that there's also a lot that we just don't know.
this grief is so nuanced. like i said, i don't support what he has done in the past -- i haven't supported him in YEARS because of the things he's said and done. i stand w all of his victims that spoke up, and i hope they're all doing okay rn and that they know that none of this is their fault.
there's something so weird and sad about combing the emotions of coming to terms with the fact that the person you idolized as a teen turned out to be a bad person, along with the rough and weird feelings of grief that come with that same person dying suddenly, gruesomely, and tragically.
this is all so tragic, so weird, so surreal, and SO hard. there's a lot of weird conflicting and nuanced emotions running through not just me, but so many of us who grew up loving one direction. i'm aching for 12-15 year old me who wouldn't recover from this. i'm destroyed for his son who survives him, his family, friends, and the other one direction boys. my heart also aches for his victims, who i'm sure are experiencing a lot of conflicting and weird emotions about this. i can't imagine what they're all going through right now and can only hope they're doing okay.
this is the first major celebrity death ive experienced, at least with a celebrity i genuinely loved and obsessed over growing up. ik a lot of people feel the same way too.
whatever you're feeling about this right now is valid. you have the right to feel however you feel. you can mourn the loss of someone who meant a lot to you as a child while also remembering that they turned out to be a bad person.
sorry i keep talking abt this but it hits so hard. like i said like 30 times this is so weird and hard and confusing to a lot of us one direction fans who stopped supporting liam a while back bc of his actions. grieving with perspective and nuance is necessary here but it's not easy.
i hope my fellow one direction fans are doing okay today <3
#sorry for the wall of text but. i just wanted to say something more coherent now that the shock has settled#this is such a weird and tragic and sad situation all around#a huge chunk of my childhood is gone so i'm sad about that#i'm also sad and disappointed about who he turned out to be. on top of being sad and shocked about his sudden death#this is all so much to handle and ik i'm not alone in this#if you wanna talk abt it don't be afraid to dm me or send me an ask <3#regardless of how you feel abt this please take care of yourselves and check in on your friends and loved ones 🫶🏻#liam payne#one direction#cw death#cw accidental death#cw mentions of alcoholism#cw mentions of addiction#amori rambles#long post
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the fact that all grown up ran for five seasons is unaccountable
#they're all on paramount plus#text post#i remembered the show recently out of curiosity#and i'm not bashing it don't get me wrong. that show's been bashed enough#and frankly i haven't watched a single episode since i was like 11 so i can't judge#rugrats also ended when i was kinda young. and i've seen that show since but like. i'm not a Rugrats Kid#i never appreciated it as much as some ppl. it was just kinda another show i watched. i missed the big phenomenon of it#i think#but i never knew a single person growing up who was really all that into all grown up#it seemed like whenever someone talked about it they were just like 'why'#i knew a girl on my bus in like 2nd/3rd grade whose mom stopped letting her watch all the 'cool' shows#i dont remember why. but all of the sudden she was complaining about how all she watches anymore is like#all grown up and life with derek#loooool#LIFE WITH DEREK WAS ... LET'S JUST NOT TALK ABOUT IT#those 2 shows were not incredibly popular and the main networks never showed them that much#so like. hm? FIVE SEASONS#im assuming at the end they sent it to nicktoons network to die but still. five seasons#is it good actually? im thinking of rewatching it just to see
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I feel like we should use the excuse that knowing someone for 7 years doesn’t mean being friends with them for 7 years. Like I know people from high school but hell if I know what they’re doing now
#missed opportunity of them remeeting each other#re getting to know each other#sure they had a year where they hung out multiple times a week or did a thing together or lived close by#but radio silence or raaaaare holiday texts for the following 5 years they knew eachother#paired by the suddenness of working together all day every day#learning so much about someone#only remembering who they used to be#still being scared to say something because of opinions shared years ago#hm.#thinking thoughts#sf
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can i be honest for a sec? i kind of don’t like the david tennant + catherine tate much ado.
truly just personal preference but i hate the direction of the confession scene, it takes all of the gravity and weight out of the previous scene, hero’s humiliation, claudio’s betrayal, beatrice’s anger…. i understand the intention: love is a funny, embarrassing, human thing! but i also think that the tone shift ends up being so jarring and bizarre and ultimately doesn’t work very well with the themes of the text.
anyways everyone go watch the 2019 shakespeare in the park Much Ado it’s on archive.org and it’s FANTASTIC!
#truly my favorite thing about much ado is the way it VERGES on tragedy. if one thing had been different in that story it would have all gone#so very very tragically and i love that it doesn’t! and i love the sudden genre shock in the middle of the text like fuck it’s good#claudio’s rage and beatrice’s ‘kill claudio’ are SOOOO shocking and sobering from the humor and revelry of the rest of the piece and they’re#such a stark difference to the previous scenes. they make you stop and go. oh. he ruined hero’s life on a whim#and beatrice wants him dead for that. and is benedick’s love great enough that he will kill for her?#somebody take me home i’m thinking about the way much ado was very nearly a tragedy again#lu.txt#shakespeare#much ado about nothing
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incomprehensible yap in the tags tldr im just not doing well i guess
#text#i miss my weed + benadryl + ibuprofen + occasionally valium days (1 year ago) thatwas so much more awesome#i used to use benadryl n valium to sleep but i ran out of the former n could barely sleep for days so i stole some from . costco .#of all places😭#but id built up an intolerance i guess cause it stopped working At All i cld take like 3 times the amount i used to and nothing wld happen#since then my sleep schedule has Kind Of fixed itself since im in school now n have to wake up before the ass crack of dawn#its just better tho not awesome#n lately its been worse again all of a sudden#ive been having nightmares n less sleep n ive been rlly out of it during the day#in a lot of pain also <3 i love not going to the doctor out of fear and self medicating with caffeine and ludicrous amnts of ibuprofen#i think i might have built up an intolerance to that too lately its barely helped#but i do mean Ludicrous i went thru one of those big bottles(500 tablets) in less than 2 months#im aware it's bad and not healthy for me but like theres nothing else i can Do#theres no cure or catchall treatment plan for cloves syndrome#and it gets worse over time and Brouther Its Been Worse#so yay i will be in horrible pain for the rest of my short little life <3 im just trying to make it as better as i can#ive said all this before probably but im upset again#ive been rly fucking suicidal lately n ive been meaning to tell one of my teachers or my counselor but i know for sure theyll tell my mom#and that wont help at all#i Dont want to kill myself i just dont want to be in pain im so so sick of the pain and no one seems to understand
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