#and the fucking responses are sending me

[saffrongymleader]

🫒

[inkskinned]

it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.

yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.

it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.

how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.

chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?

how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.

"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.

i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.

[front-facing-pokemon]

[starry-bi-sky]

pouring one out for luo binghe in my disciple SQQ fic, poor guy has taken a backseat here. we're nearly 30k words deep and he hasn't even shown his face once. it'll be much longer before he even actually talks to Shen Qingqiu.

(i say im pouring one out but in reality im sitting in my director's chair chewing on a cigar and wearing a beret as he tearily and unsuccessfully pleads with me for more scenes with Shen Qingqiu)

[spaceparadize]

Ok but imagine writing Faust a song about being flawed and lonely and practically begging for love to come save you to create a dream of bare minimum human survival things like friendship and sleep. And then. And then some cunt steals it, calls you a fag, has you kicked shitless, sends you to jail, funds them ripping ur teeth out, and to top it off ruining that same fucking song, which of course you don't know about till it's on the god damn radio. this is reasonable murderous intent if there ever was one, and then you fuck it up, You fuck it up so bad and ur face. And you think oh maybe I can fix this with a goth outfit and this knife I have with no explanation and you fucking fail to knife the most easily knifable man at his most knifable moment. And then he looks you dead in ur fucking eye, calls you horrible and is like let's be friends k :3 trust me. Fuuuckk thaat fuck that all the way to hell and back. If I were Winslow, no, I would have continued with the knife plan for the rest of the duration of the film in increasingly comic and absurd ways and once I realized Swan can't die that way I woulda kept knifing him just for catharsis. Just oh there's a pause in this conversation, Knife You.

[deadpoetsandlivinglegends]

Something something our lives are echo chambers and we just keep repeating the same motions

[vulpinesaint]

I really like your writing style. Do you have any literature you can share that you use as inspo?

going to start by disclaiming that from a specifically stylistic approach, i don't know if i have any writers that are distinctly similar. i do have writers that i find inspiring, though! if none of these are helpful for style, i hope they can inspire you in the same way that they make me aspire to achieve fantastic things with my writing :) i am always a poet first and foremost, whether it's poetry or prose (which is often just poetry hiding in a longer form), so most of my recommendations are poems; i have a few books at the end, though, just in case. everything that i link here should be free to access!

i am like 90% sure that anyone seeing this will already know that i keep all my poetry over at @trickstersaint, but just in case you're coming direct from a quiz, that's the place to read more of my writing! now. onto my list of a bunch of other trans poets with tumblr platforms 🖤

keaton st. james (@boykeats), i think, was the first modern poet that i really found and loved. stumbling across some of his dictionary poems as a younger poet was so revolutionary to me, and reading his poetry changed the way that i thought about and approached poetry as a whole. inspiration in the way of seeing the things that someone can do with poetry. opening up all the limits. this is what every good poem will do for you a little bit, i think, but keaton st. james is always my first recommendation for a modern poet. highly recommend his collections growth and light (i personally really love light. guy who is normal about religion voice) and rural boys watch the apocalypse is to me what that one richard siken poem about being in a car with a beautiful boy is to everyone else haha

other poets whose work i really enjoy and admire include silas denver melvin (@sweatermuppet) and dante émile (@orpheuslament)! recommending the poems an impractical marvel and dioscuri from them, respectively. sweatermuppet also has a full collection called grit, and orpheuslament has one called misplaced organs and various saints (this particular one isn't free but linking it here!) :)

my favorite poem since high school has been gravity by maura o'connor. life-changing. that poem is just like me for real.

for more of a narrative style, if you've read + liked my piece aromanticism, i definitely recommend with those we love alive by porpentine! really gorgeous twine piece with a kind of mysticism to it that could definitely tie back into the kind of stuff you'd see in my little quizzes too :)

if you're looking for actual literature-as-in-books, i can point you towards our wives under the sea by julia armfield and white is for witching by helen oyeyemi. both are novels that i've enjoyed for their kind of eclectic and poetic writing recently! i will also take any chance to recommend my favorite book, which is the hours by michael cunningham; regardless of similarity or inspiration, i find the writing of this book gorgeous and heartbreaking and i think it scrapes at the human condition in a way that draws blood. gently. if you know what i mean.

i hope this was helpful! i constantly feel as if i don't read enough poetry so if anyone has any suggestions they want to give me. i am more than happy to hear them <3 happy reading everybody!

[salamanderpickle]

🚨 PSA FOR MY COLORADO HOMIES 🚨

If you live in an apartment complex or have a mail locker of any kind

GET YOUR MAIL EVERY DAY.

Colorado mail lockers all use the same master key and that key has been stolen. Mail theft is on the rise. My apartment's mailboxes have been broken into 3 times and management never told us. I did not find out until I walked into the mailroom and found a bunch of lockers open and empty.

I recently applied for my passport. When you do that they mail you back your identifying documents. My fucking original birth certificate and my new credit card were both stolen out of my mailbox this weekend.

The only thing you can do to prevent theft from your mailroom is to get your mail every single day.

[amrv-5]

Going to walk into the fucking water 🙏👍🚶➡️🌊

[sunnibits]

I literally have zero art motivation right now but you can have these ofmd x pokémon doodles I made ages ago and never posted ‼️

[frederickkittens]

.

[anxiously-sidequesting]

Not to keep beating dead horses like I so much love to do but I am still completely Flabbergasted and Astonished at how you (Merle Ambrose) could discover the most terrifying fact that a child that is essentially under your care has been indoctrinated into a cult (which, by the way, a process that has taken over the course of years) ((by an agent that has been stationed in a direct position to make it easier to access and manipulate children, that has easily escaped your notice for such a long time)) that worships a nihilistic entity whose ultimate goal is the absolute and total destruction of Everything and Everyone around you, and your one, single, simple-sentenced response to that is to say "Oh, that's a shame. He (Duncan) always was pretty terrible. Hope he gets better someday." And then to move on from those extremely worrying and dangerous bundle of issues permanently without taking any sort of action to protect the vulnerable and make sure nothing like this ever happens again

[carouselunique]

Is it true that there's no animosity between you and... you know, you know who. You never talk about her in any way. I guess I'm curious. You guys seemed like really close friends and then just weren't friends at all. And there was some stuff she said that seemed very targeted at you...

I don't know if she feels any animosity toward me or not any more. Our mutual friends have said she doesn't and I take them on their word in that regard, assuming that if they have an answer for me it's because they're aware how she feels. I wouldn't know and it's not my place to put words in her mouth.

I haven't spoken to her/about her in a long time and the only time she even crosses my mind is when people bring her up to me. As for me feeling any animosity? I'll admit my feelings on her these days are complicated and way too nuance-core for people who aren't my friends to hear about but I wouldn't call them animosity in any way. I inherently want people my friends care about to live well because I care about my friends, and anyone my friends care about by proxy and I still share friends with her. I would never wish ill on people my friends care about so animosity doesn't fit into that by definition. I'd say I'm hurt more than anything and even then I've worked through a lot of it with trusted friends who have helped me deal with my emotions in a healthy way.

(Besides, my own life struggles keep me from even being able to invest time into animosity. I have to expend that energy loving my family, doing my best to support them during our struggles. And I've never been a hateful person it isn't in me. I would rather play 'Hot To Go' by Chappell Roan and teach my dad how to do the hand gestures to help him strengthen his muscles again than focus on hating anyone...)

I try not to think about her because it hurts. I often think that people forget that I'm a real person outside of her sphere, and that I wouldn't want to talk about what happened because I truly did consider her a friend for a long time. And when someone I consider a friend appears to not regard me with care any more suddenly and I don't even have closure on that... well... it hurts... A lot. Of course I never talk about it.

And I'm not stupid, I have seen some stuff she's said that I've gathered was about me. I remind myself that she has a right to vent in her own spaces and I truly mean that... it's just a shame that her own spaces have people who then have taken these things to me to show me (after all, I wouldn't have even seen these things myself if not for third-party anons going 'this u?') saying it is my own fault because I was a terribly cruel friend or my own fault for not listening to warnings about her when I had the chance and that makes me a stupid gullible bitch. You lot haven't seen some of the awful shit about me from some of her more ravenous fans and haters I've seen over the years that I've had to let roll off my back in the fear it would bring backlash - not even to me, to her. I don't want to be the cause of any hatred going to anyone.

Also I'm just not going to ever talk about the details of our fallen friendship or our fallen relationship. That's private. She might be a public person to some extent but I never was, even if I do gain some measure of small fandom for my work one day I'm just private about personal matters especially raw ones. I almost deleted this ask entirely but Idk I never stated that it bothers me when people talk to me about her from my own mouth, so I guess that's what this ramble is.

If you send me anything about Lily Orchard it will not be addressed. I am not a part of her life not even through our mutual friends. I do not know or care what's going on with her public/personal life. I haven't kept up. I will never keep up. Don't treat me as an extension of the situation because I am not in the situation. In the most plainly stated sense of the word: Leave me the Hell alone. (...pretty please.)

All I've wanted this entire time was to be left alone to process everything in a healthy, peaceful way. I'm workin' on it.

[front-facing-pokemon]

[momo-shut-the-fuck-up]

Hello I’m new! I read somewhere that most of the outfits so far have been very Lilith kingdom coded (??) because that’s what the heartland kingdom is based on (??) and they predicted that when we get clothes they’ll usually be in the design of the location we’re in in-game?? Do you have any expertise or comments to share with an enthusiastic Nikki newbie?

Hihi welcome to nikkiverse :] This is quite a long reply, thats y it took me so long to get to ya.

I summarised the 7 nations and their respective styles/names across the franchise, and included a link to a more in depth explanation of the nations of Miraland if you feel like doin research- but then i saw that post had a much better and much more succinct TLDR than i made oops. So i ll keep what i wrote but if u dont feel like readin it, just go to the reddit.

I'll give you a v brief overview of the other games too, thats y im tryna save u from my rambling lol- it aint over once u get past the nations pfft. Put it under a readmore cuz it was gettin looong

Ninir/lilith/Heartcraft kingdom: cutesy and/or fairytale-esque designs. Most people call it Lilith, from Love nikki. I can see why they started with Lilith, it s the most "whimsical" of the bunch, and they love that word. Its true that there's been a good amount of Lilith-styled suits released so far, but there's a decent amount of apple and north and now we have cloud styles too- hold on,

Apple Federation/Starhail Federation- It's basically modern styles, and anythin that doesnt quite fit into the rest of the nations. Styles are very varied and range from Regular Girl from Class to Worlds Most Overdesigned Gacha Character (and they fuck hard). The trend is just that the clothes are inspired by (relatively) modern fashion trends.

Cloud/Linglang empire- chinese/east asian traditional clothing. Devs loove cloud, ofc they do, bcs theyre a chinese company. If ur into this style too, ur in for a wonderful time playin these games buddy

North kingdom/ Empire of light: Millitary style, knights, soldiers, cool bitches w guns or just cool bitches in general (istg sometimes they put apple suits in north for no reason) oh also fluffy warm clothing. Its cold in the north after all. They dont get a lot of suits.

Pigeon/Twinmoon Kingdom: European style clothes, as well as religious inspos, and demons/angels (pigeon has always had some connection with the church). Academia, steampunk, uhh idk victorian clothing etc. U get the vibe yea?

Wasteland/Terra Alliance: Racism land. Or more accurately, whatever seems "exotic" to devs, they throw it in there. Ancient egyptian, middle east, indian, uhh idk dreamcatchers r wild right? Put that in there. they have some native american ones too and yeah they re all pretty questionable. Wasteland doesn't have a great reputation. Idk if infinikki will be better about this, but when u throw half the planet's traditional clothing styles into a mixer you re already doin somethin wrong imo

Ruin island/Whale port: Futurism babey. Wires and glowy things and tech and robots n shit. Pretty simple really

https://www.reddit.com/r/InfinityNikki/comments/1hbslkd/an_general_introduction_to_the_seven_nations_of/?rdt=49525

Here s the reddit post. Very helpful, a Nikkiverse veteran that explains the world of Miraland for people just getting into it in Infinikki. I just realised at the very bottom of their post, there's a much more compact TLDR of the nations than I cooked up.... coulda saved me a lotta trouble writing it and you a lotta trouble reading it...

So. In the other games (Love/Shining Nikki) we get whatever style the devs feel like throwing at us. Sometimes there s craftable ones related to the main story thus the location we're in. But in Infinity Nikki it's slightly different.

We are Not region locked in terms of aesthetics- as i said, we got Apple and North style clothes as well as stuff from Cloud, alongside the cutesy Lilith style clothing. A lot has been "Lilith Kingdom coded" as you put it, because we are in Lilith equivalent. (I Think we have some Pigeon coded stuff too- but sometimes Apple/Lilith/Pigeon's styles blur together a bit)

However, i d guess it's gonna be some time before we get Ruin style suits, let alone Wasteland- they're already the least popular in devs minds, they have the least amount of suits in every single game so far. So ima guess we're only half region locked, but not at all completely stuck with bows and frills.

Now, I don't really know if you're currently Playin any of the games. Ima guess infinikki is ur gateway drug?

Love Nikki is a lot of people's first Nikki game. 2D and incredibly detailed, it's been running for- close to 10 years now. It's Old, and feels old, and isn't very friendly to newcomers- but if you get past it's clunk you'll get the most robust 2D dress up experience there is. Except that yes, we have bunch of skintones, but none of them work with 99% of makeups..... devs have a bad track record with diversity.

Shining Nikki is the new shiny (ha) 3D game that got a global release in 2021. I was there day 1 i was so fuckin hyped for it- and it does it's job damn well. Much more intuitive and more f2p friendly than Love Nikki, but it will fry your phone. Monkey's paw curls.

And Infinity Nikki is "what if Sn was open world" except that we're not even in the same world as Sn do nvm.... Clothes are every bit as detailed as in Sn, and i'll stop here cuz my guess is that ur comin from here. If sn fries ur phone tho, infinikki destroys it- cant really enjoy the beautiful dresses unless u got a nasa phone or play on pc. If u can tho, it's the most straightforward of the bunch in terms of gameplay- really made for beginners of the franchise.

Soo pick ur poison, or play all 3 if ur insane. Read the main story, or don't, make pretty outfits, save diamonds so u can get more pretty clothes to make pretty outfits with- now Nikki has cemented herself in your life. You can never leave. You will wake up in a cold sweat at 12 am thinkin "oh fuck shit i didnt do my dailies-"

That is to say, remember these are all gacha games, Infinikki being the purest form of them 3. Thus, they all have inherently predatory monetization. Be conscious of it and spend responsibly if you choose to do so. It's not necessary per se, i haven't spent in love nikki in- 3 or so years i think? (I got mad at devs so i did my own lil boycott lol- long story,) and ever since sn came out, i think i gave em like, 60? 80? I dont remember. Its a lot when put in plain numbers, but when i think this was across 4 years, it makes me feel better lol.

And well, i think these are the essentials to know- honestly, the whole nations stuff isn t even needed to get started, but you asked specifically about it, so i gave u the rundown. Nikkiblr is a much smaller community than others, but it's cozy in here- hope u stick around~

[chamiryokuroi]

Trying to explain front end logic to back end developers is the most annoying and time wasting task ever.

You would think me being a full stack dev would make things easier right? WRONG