#and put protect on every single mon

[imunbreakabledude]

before i started playing renegade platinum i feel like 90% of what i heard about this romhack was about how spooky scary the 12v12 battle on spear pillar is and after clearing it 0 deaths on my first try im feeling very elle woods What Like It's Hard?.gif

[lostmymind-0]

Loosing you broke me (SMAU)

this takes place somewhere on the same timeline as the written fic, around 2020/2021

Masterlist

Lestappen_love

liked by Maxverstappen33 and others

And we have an other post to worship Juliette Leclerc aka the sweetest and most beautiful human (all pics are from Max's new post)

User1: Gosh she is so cute!!!

USer2: We need to protect her!!

Maxverstappen33: ❤️❤️

->User1: why is no one suprised that he is commenting and following!?

Juliette_Lec

liked by pascale.leclerc, Maxverstappen33 and others

Some things never change <3 happy seven years, mon amor

Maxverstappen33: The best years of my life! i love you, baby <3

Danielricciardo: How the fuck are you together for seven years? You two are basically babies?!

User1: Wait five years ago were they 16 and 15?!

User2: HOw the fuck did they do this? I mean i love them but they were so young and still are!

Gosspi.F1WAG

liked by User1, and others

Is the sunshine WAG not that much of a sunshine? lately a lot of fans have noticed that the young girls arms are allegenly covered in scars, which look a lot like self harm scars. What do you think?

User1: My heart breaks thinking about her being in any pain!

User2: I hope she is getting help and support

Hater1: This is not something Max should be sorrounded with

Hater2: I saw a pic and it was horrible. Simply disgusting

Maxverstappen33

liked by Juliette_Lec, Danielricciardo, Charlesleclerc and others

LOOK AT MY GIRLFRIEND EVERYONE!!! MY BEAUTIFUL, SMART, STRONG, TALENTED AND LOVING GIRLFRIEND!!! <3 <3 I love you baby

Maxverstappen33: PS: If anyone dares to talk shit about her, am i going to kill you

User1: Do you guys think he saw that post abt the scars?

Juliette_Lec: I love you, Maxie. You make me blush

-> Charlesleclerc: She is actually blushing.

-> Charlesleclerc: I still do not like this btw

Danielricciardo: SIMP

-> Maxverstappen33: Maybe but everyone would be with her as girlfriend 💅🏻

liked by Redbullracing, Maxverstappen33 and others

My two fav things painting and my maxy on the podium <3

User1: "My maxy" i am so single it hurts

User2: I am not sure if i want to be her or be Max to be WITH her?!

Maxverstappen33: Can i put it in my sim room? It looks amazing, liefje

-> Juliette.Lec: You already have six in there?

-> Maxverstappen33: And?

Danielricciardo:The painting is really pretty

Redbullracing

liked by Maxverstappen33, Charlesleclerc and Juliette.Lec

Happy birthday to our favourite Red Bull girly <3 We love to have you in the family and wish you all the best

User1: Red bull loves her more than they love Max and Checo 😂

Juliette.Lec: Thank you, Red Bull 🫶🏻

Maxverstappn33: My beautiful girl <3 Ps: you are welcome for the picture, admin

Ferrari

liked by Charlesleclerc, Maxverstappen33 and Juliette.Lec

back off @/redbullracing she is ours! Happy birthday to the girl who looks best in red, our favourite Leclerc ❤️

Redbullracing: We had her first!!

-> User1: Not the teams fighting over her 😂

Juliette.Lec: Thank you, Ferrari 🫶🏻

Julitette.Lec

liked by Maxverstappen33, Charlesleclerc, Arthurleclerc and others

Joyeux anniversaire, papa. Tu me manques tous les jours. Il y a une grande partie qui manque sans toi. Je t'aime. Tu me manques.* 💔❤️

Charlesleclerc: Il est fier de vous, chéri

User1: OMG this is so cute and sad at the same time

User2: The painting is killing me

User3: She was such a daddy girl

*Happy birthday, Dad. I miss you every day. There's a big part of me that misses you. I love you, Dad. I miss you

[cry-ptidd]

NEW QUESTION for the question gods! How does Laura, Walter, Alucard, Seras, Pip, and Integra treat their love interests/SO's?

Integra

Integra is a very proud and headstrong woman, it is only natural that she wants someone who can withstand her strength.

She has a motherly side, and would treat her SO with grace and care. She would make sure they’re protected.

She knows the dangers of the world, and is intent on keep her SO safe and sound, sometimes restricting their movements if she senses the situation is too dangerous. She would keep them in her study, talking all night and reading together, complimenting them just enough to keep them on their toes. She knows her charisma and isn’t afraid to use it.

She would also not hesitate to make them work. She is the Hellsing family’s heir, and is not going to settle on someone wimpy. They’d have to prove themselves to her, in more than one way.

Alucard

Likewise, Alucard won’t settle for less than someone interesting and entertaining.

I imagine he would be very romantic in a strange way, always singing praises and teasing his SO in any way possible. He’s also very kinky, so that doesn’t help his creepy allegations.

Despite that, he would hesitate to bring his SO on missions alongside him. Only if they know how to protect themselves. He would gladly take holy bayonets to the ribs for his partner if it comes to it.

He would be unsettling at times, testing their limits (without crossing boundaries of course, vampires can’t come in unless invited) and seeing how they react to his different forms and powers. Maybe he’d let them hold his guns to see if they can lift them, or let them put on his coat just to see his partner wobble around in a coat that’s five sizes too big for them.

Seras

Seras is as sweet as they come. She knows what hardship is like, and loves to take care of her SO.

She is a cuddle monster. Don’t let her catch you off guard, because her vampire strength is no joke. She has yet to control it.

She would also object wholeheartedly to her partner going on missions with her, not wanting a single scratch on them. If she has to, she WILL tape them to a chair to prevent them from going anywhere while she’s at work.

She would get very defensive if anyone ever tries to mess with her SO, and knowing her, that can range from getting told "Go away, you mean freak !" to actually getting shot to smithereens.

Walter

Walter is very attentive and doesn’t mess around. One wrong move and someone is getting dismembered. So their SO can know they’re safe with him.

He would cater to their every need, and see as they are the most comfortable possible.

Emotionally, he would be devoted and suave. As a butler, it is only natural that he makes sure his SO is living their best life. He might be a bit smothering at times. However, when it comes to HIS emotions, he can be flustered and might slip up if his SO makes a move first.

That said, he would not hold them back on missions, letting them grow stronger and intervening if he has to.

Pip

Pip is a womanizer. And a romantic one at that. But, with a SO he settled with, they don’t have to worry about cheating. He might get smacked on the head for flirting innocently with someone else, but that’s about it.

Dates with him are simple, but they’re the most fun someone could have. Maybe he’d even bring them with the Wild Geese to teach them how to use weaponry.

He would give them the most sweet and teasing french nicknames, ranging from Mon Cher, to Mon Cœur, to Mon Amour to ones you have to see in a dictionary. All said with a cigarette in his mouth and a wink.

He would show off his SO to everyone, say loud and proud that they’re his, especially to the Wild Geese. He just has to let everyone know that they’re together and he loves them.

Laura

Laura is a bit of a mixed bag. For an old creature, she hasn’t lived among humans that much. However, when she does find someone that loves her, she clings to them like a leech.

As a maid, she would make sure everything is perfect for them and that their every need is met. Do not complain around her, because she WILL kill someone if they looked at you wrong or break a door that caught your sleeve. In means of security, her SO probably has one of the best bodyguards one could wish for. They might even see her in full wolf form if the situation calls for it.

She has a hard time being emotional, so she lets them make moves. Other than her serving them with her deeds or her body, she has no idea how she could be desirable. So her SO would need to know how to treat her with kindness, even if she can be a bit too honest from time to time. (She apologizes immediately if she says something wrong.)

They would see her at her most vulnerable maybe. She takes care of them as much as they take care of her. It’s a symbiotic relationship.

[earth2pearl]

Summer rain

“Regulus?” James called, checking the bathroom for what felt like the 100th time. He wasn’t in the kitchen, the bedroom, the bathroom, his studio, the dining room, or the living room, and James was beginning to panic.

He walked back into the living room, a small rumble of thunder causing him to notice the crack in the back door. A bit of water was beginning to pool as the relentless rain poured down from the darkening sky. Beside the door frame sat Regulus’ work shoes, neatly placed side by side.

James made his way to the back porch, making a mental note to fix the bloody leak again.

“Regulus, darling?” He called, scanning the slowly flooding backyard. On the water-covered path laid the younger man, his bare feet crossed at the ankles and his hands folded over his stomach. His white button-down shirt and black pants were thoroughly soaked, his hair painted across his forehead. James thought he looked ethereal but could see the red puffiness surrounding the other man’s eyes.

“Oh, darling” James whispered, walking out from the safety of the porch to crouch next to his lover.

“Please go back inside mon chéri, you might get sick. I’ll be in in a moment, I promise” Regulus softly mumbled, opening his eyes but avoiding eye contact with his fiancé.

“Darling you’re going to get sick” James whispered in return, gently moving the hair on Regulus' forehead away from his eyes. Although this didn’t happen often anymore, James was familiar with how to help. He knew Regulus was telling him to go away but needed him to show that he cared. He began to lay down beside Regulus, offering out his hand.

“What are you doing?” Regulus inquired, his voice full of concern.

“I’m here until you're ready to go inside”

“But you hate getting your clothes wet”

“But I love you”

Regulus wavered, then gently took James’ hand. For a while, there was only a comfortable silence between the two men.

“I don’t deserve you” Regulus whispered, afraid to utter it any louder. He felt James slightly tense beside him before responding.

“You deserve the universe Regulus. The stars, moons, planets, and galaxies. I’d give you it all in a heartbeat. You are worth everything and more. I’d give anything for you to see yourself the way I see you” James whispered back honestly, hoping the other man knew he meant every word.

Regulus couldn’t respond, not verbally. Instead, he turned his head to face James, and placed a soft, gentle kiss to his temple. James smiled, his face towards the sky, his glasses completely covered in water droplets. He didn’t look over, knowing Regulus didn’t like to be looked at when he felt vulnerable. Regulus looked back up, a faint smile ghosting his lips, the rain washing away his melancholic mood.

—

The two men stayed there until the porch light turned on, and the rain slowed to a drizzle. Regulus was the first to move, but James quickly stood and held out a hand for his star.

After a hot shower and a quick meal, the two men found themselves in bed, Regulus safely tucked into James’ chest. He absentmindedly traced the tattoo on his lover’s upper arm while listening to his heartbeat.

“Thank you,” Regulus quietly muttered.

“What for love?” James questioned sleepily.

“Everything” he whispered, hoping to convey how grateful he was for James in just a single word.

In return, James pressed a gentle kiss to Regulus’ forehead with a hum. Regulus smiled to himself, letting himself be consumed by James’ aura of comfort and warmth. Soon both men were sound asleep, protected in each other's arms.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

This is the first fanfic I ever actually put effort into writing and actually post which I’m super excited about! I would love feedback/tips if anyone is willing to give them! I hope you enjoyed reading it!

[footballfanficwriter]

Can I have some Kylian fluff where reader rests her feet on his lap, he knows she loves having her feet tickled so he always runs his fingers up and down her soles, tickling her arches and toes and always cooing at her tootsies and shes just always grateful for his touch pleaseee💗

Home alone

Summary:where the reader and Kylian are just enjoying each other's company

"Kylian" I shout through as I enter the house after a long day at work

"Cherie?" He responds from the other room

"Where are you?"

"Living room"

I walk to the living room and find him watching TV

"Ça va"

"Ça va ma cherie" he says pecking my lips

"How was you day" I ask sitting on the sofa

"Boring, just training and eating, then showering and then i came back home and made dinner"

"That doesn't really sound boring"

"Well it was, any way how was your day" he asks

"Tiring, my boss is an ass, that's for sure" I say and rest my feet on his lap

"What happened this time?

He starts removing my heels and starts rubbing my feet

"What are you doing"

"Trying to relax you"

"Weird, but ok"

"So, what happened" he asks and starts ticking my feet

" Kylian, stop ticking my feet" I say trying to stop laughing

"Shhhhh, I'm trying to relax you, tell me what your boss did"

"It's not even important, I don't wanna talk about her when I'm with you"

"Ok babe only if you say so, but are you sure you're ok"

"Yeah, just had a very stressful day, where are the kids?"

"Lizzy is having a sleepover at Roxy's house and Enzo is having a sleepover at Fernando's house"

"Was, that today?"

"Yeah, but don't worry I took care of everything"

"Merci beaucoup, mon Amour"

"De rien, ma cherie"

"That means, we have the house to ourselves"

"Yip"

"So, what do you want to do"

"I'm not gonna lie, I'm too tired to do anything naughty right now"

"Same"

"Let's just watch some movies"

"Ok, I'll go get my food and then we can find something"

"Nah uh Mrs. Mbappe, sit yourself down, I'm taking care of you for the rest of the night"

"Ok fine"

He walks to the kitchen, warms the food up and brings it to me

"Thank you"

"You're welcome"

He walks goes upstairs and walks our room

"Where are you going?" I ask

"I'll be back" he says

After some time he comes back with some of his clothes

"Here, I got you something to change into"

"Thank you"

"Here let me help you"

"I can do it myself"

"I know but I wanna help"

He starts helping strip down until I'm in my underwear and bra

"Can you help with my bra" I ask

"Yeah"

I then turn around

I feel him trace my healed scars on my back and his warm fingers trace them as I have my eyes closed feeling every single touch

"I can't believe, all this happened to you" he says

"Yeh, but it's all in the past now, ok"

"Ok "

He unclasps by bra and puts a shirt on me then a hoodie then his joggers that I have to fold because of how big they are

We eventually find a movie to watch, but after eating my food, I fall asleep cuddling Kylian

Kylian's POV

She's asleep now, and she looks peaceful

As I watch my wife sleep while cuddling me, I think about all the trama and abuse she went through only because she was born into the wrong family, the many times they hurt her and she'd still get up every time only to take their crap again

The amount of therapy she went to was a lot, flip a lot is an understatement

After some time I realize I'm crying, I try to be quiet,but seems unsuccessful as she sees my red eyes and tearful eyes

She looks at me and cups my cheek while wiping my tears

"Stop, ok you saved me from that horrid place, if it wasn't for you I don't know where I'd be , it's because of your love and our children that I healed and opened my eyes, Thank you"

"Don't thank me Amour, I was just protecting you, like you'd done for me before"

She looks at me and hugs me like this is our last hug

She then pulls back and says

"Merde mais je t'aime Kylian"

"Je t'aime aussi ma cherie, tes mon vie"

She kisses me and I deepen it and she pulls away and lays he head on my chest and I think of how lucky I am to have this woman in my life

[pokemon-academy-official]

Hello, Academy! I've always wondered what the measurements are in galarian battles. Simply put, how do you allow a mon' to get HUGE and nobody get hurt? I'm sure there must've been an accident at least once, right?

Especially with mons like hatterene, which from what I've read in the pokedex is already extremely upset by emotions, in its gigantamax form it becomes much more violent in that aspect.

How can it be that they battle in stadiums with hundreds of people and that they can concentrate on the battle without being distracted and upset by the emotions of all those people?

Sorry if this question is a bit silly, but I'm genuely curious..

Greetings!

Woohoo, Wooloo! This is a question about the Dynamax phenomenon of the Galar region. Specifically, about how battles involving the phenomenon can be safe and comfortable for the Pokémon involved.

The Dynamax Phenomenon, Abridged

Note: Much of this section is a summary of the work of Professor Magnolia.

Dynamaxing is a phenomenon observed in the Galar region, in specific areas known as "Power Spots". While many of these spots have been left in their natural state as Pokémon Dens in Galar's iconic Wild Area and less populated surrounding areas, some have had stadia constructed upon them to engage in thrilling Dynamax battles, most often in the region's Gym Challenge and Champion tournaments.

The phenomenon itself is the temporary enormous growth of a single Pokémon, granting it increased strength and modified offensive moves. Some Pokémon undergo a more dramatic transformation, called Gigantamaxing, which further improves certain moves and changes the Pokémon's appearance.

The phenomenon appears to be caused by the absorption of Dynamax energy in the form of Galar particles. This energy is most easily concentrated by artifacts called Wishing Stars, which are often incorporated into a Dynamax Band for a Trainer to wear.

Isn't That Dangerous?

Simply put: yes.

Dyamaxed Pokémon are inherently more dangerous than non-transformed Pokémon for two main reasons.

Size. A Dynamaxed Pokémon is significantly bigger, heavier, and stronger than a non-transformed Pokémon. This increases the risk of getting hurt or trampled intentionally or accidentally, as well as the resultant injury being much more likely to be grievous.

Agitation. Dynamaxing puts considerable strain on a Pokémon, making it more likely to lash out.

So, with that in mind, how can the Dynamax battles of Galar be safe?

Dynamax Saftey

The first thing to mention is that, in the Gym Challenge and Champion tournament matches, there are several protections in place for the audience, such as invisible solid barriers maintained by groups of worker Mr. Mimes. No Dynamax accidents involving the audience have been recorded in an official Galar League battle.

So, what about the safety of the Trainers and Pokémon? Well, this is largely taken care of by the fact that not every Trainer is given a Dynamax Band. A Dynamax Band can only be granted to a Trainer after a successful evaluation by a member of the Galar League. This consists of evaluating basic safety measures, such as throwing the Dynamaxed ball well behind oneself, as well as an evaluation of the bond and trust between Trainer and Pokémon.

As is the case with so many other battle strategies, trust between the Trainer and Pokémon is the key. A Dynamaxed Pokémon may become more easily agitated, but if it has a trusting bond with its Trainer, it will know to forge on and continue battling. This is the same concept behind the successful use of Mega Evolution, Z-Moves, Battle Bonding, and Terastalization.

Consider Pokémon Dens and Wild Max Battles. These are considered extremely dangerous, and Trainers may only enter in a group of four. This is because wild Dynamaxed Pokémon are indeed a terrific danger, due to their agitation. But a trained Pokémon will know to put trust in its Trainer and continue to obey commands as normal.

But What About Hatterene?

The asker mentioned that the Hatterene line is extremely sensitive to the emotions of others and can be easily overwhelmed. Surely this would make it a poor candidate for Dynamax battles, with the excited audience of hundreds and tense situations, as well as becoming significantly more powerful?

Well, while wild Hatterene are indeed extremely reactive and dangerous, a well-trained Hatterene is among the most disciplined of Pokémon. In a Dynamax battle, with its Trainer standing before them, it will power through the psychic noise to defeat the opponent!

There is one other detail that may be of help to the Hatterene. The Gigantamax form is still not well understood, nor why only some Pokémon are able to utilize it. But Hatterene is one such Pokémon. This may suggest some natural aptitude in the Dynamax phenomenon, further explaining why a Hatterene might actually be among the better choices to Dynamax in a battle.

We hope this answers your question!

[lookbluesoup]

Here's a part II to my original NSFW ffxiv headcanons! Someone requested an afab version :3

Some of the information below will be repeated and expanded on from P1 since it's relevant, but this post will focus mostly on the female sex and also delve a little more into reproduction. It's more technical in wording than the original post, mostly because I've spent more time thinking about this since then, fleshing out my ideas.

You're welcome to adopt parts of these for your own fics/headcanons/etc if you like them, I don't mind! You're also welcome to keep doing you if you don't. To each their own pussy. If you like pussy.

There is a lot of vulva talk under the cut. If you don't want to read about genitals then don't click the cut. There is also a version with illustrated diagrams on my Pillowfort(here), if you do not want to see vulvas, do not click the link. The post was intended to have the visual guide alongside it, but I have to leave these out on tumblr bc of content restrictions.

There is also some mention of the role of things like tail docking and food restriction to maintain body shapes, so if you're sensitive to these themes, read with care.

Descriptions of genitals are "averages" but ofc size, shape, color, hair content might vary significantly between individuals!

Miqote vulvas are pretty similar to Hyur in size, shape, and variation. It should be noted, however, that instead of pubic hair, Miqo'te women grow fur similar in texture to that of their tails, which may also be similarly patterned. Fur does not grow around the anus, leaving a smooth gap between the tail and mons pubis.

Most healthy Miqo'te have a "primordial pouch", a pair of fatty deposits around the lower abdomen, stretching to the start of the legs. It is generally soft and warm, used to insulate and as a bit of natural protection over their organs. A prominent pouch is considered attractive in traditional Tribal environments, where it represents being well fed. Though the novelty of its softness can be quite enjoyable to non-Miqo'te, some working as dancers or in Ul'dahn pleasure houses may be encouraged to restrict their diet and reduce its size so they might appear more conventionally appealing to patrons of other races.

Males do not have heat cycles, but females do. Females in heat have an extremely strong drive to mate that is often impairing to other senses, and bear a distinct scent which will arouse and attract male Miqo'te. Heats commonly last between 2-14 days, and reoccur every 2-3 weeks if medicines, magics, or potions are not used to limit it. If pregnancy occurs, heat will end "early" within the next day, and the heat cycle will be suspended until roughly a month after the end of the pregnancy. 

Ovulation is induced by genital stimulation, particularly from the soft "barb" like structures on the surface of an erect Miqo'te penis. Pregnancy is possible outside of heat cycles and with amab partners who have smoother dicks, but both are extremely uncommon.

Because they are induced ovulators and have heat cycles, Miqo'te do not menstruate.

Pregnancy lasts about seven months. Fraternal twins and even triplets are extremely common, and may have different fathers. Miqo'te children learn to climb often before they can even walk very well, and infants are known to put this to use escaping cribs and getting on top of furniture where they absolutely shouldn't be

------------

(Note this section is subject to potentially significant rewriting if we ever get playable female Hroths and more lore)

Hrothgar vaginas are relatively small, though the single set of labia around it are quite large by comparison and covered in short, thick fur, joining in a point near the top. The clitoris is deeper inside the vagina and not usually visible from the outside. There is a small hairless patch directly around the anus, but otherwise the nether regions are entirely covered in fur.

Like Miqo'te, Hrothgar often have primordial pouches around their lower stomach and upper legs. These tend to be less common in Hrothgar, however, and less prominent. They are visually more obscured by fur, and may not be noticed without being touched.

They have a heat cycle and traits similar to Miqo'te, however, female Hrothgar only go into heat every 3-4 months. Cross-race pregnancies for Hrothgar mothers are especially rare, as the barbed penis of male Hrothgar is necessary to stimulate ovulation. Mating between Hrothgar can be painful because of these barbs, so it's probably not done for pleasure much outside of heats, unless the gal's really into masochism.

Because they are induced ovulators and have heat cycles, Hrothgar do not menstruate.

Pregnancy lasts around 9 months, and while twins are far more common than in other races, usually only a single child is born. 

------------

Viera vulvas are not terribly different from Hyurs, though on average tend to have much larger labia and prepuce, and a smaller vagina. The clitoris is quite large and erects significantly when aroused. Viera naturally grow a lot of pubic hair, which if left unshaved will typically completely obscure the genitals. 

Viera are born with fluffy tails that curl upward to around the small of the back. In traditional villages, these are usually docked off of infants and magic may even be used to remove the scarring during the healing process. It is not widely discussed with outsiders, to whom it often appears that some Viera have tails while others do not.

Female viera have no heat cycle. Ovulation occurs during arousal and genital stimulation. Because they are induced ovulators, Viera do not menstruate.

Pregnancy lasts around 18 months, but can go on as long as two years, at which point a single child completely devoid of hair is born. Twins are very rare.

------------ 

Au Ra vaginas are tucked inside a scale-covered cloaca. The cloaca is the only rear orfice, concealing also the urethra and anus. This slit is convex (curving inward) usually, but when aroused, will convex out as it swells. The cloacal entrance usually does not reveal anything internal on its own, and must be pried open (y'know, with a dick. or fingers. or a toy.) However, during orgasm, it's known to "flash" open in time with spasms.

The "labia" are fused to the walls of the cloaca and large. While the vagina appears narrow between these and the large clitoris, it can be stretched open fairly wide. Note that "fairly wide" is relative - Au Ra women are quite small and races like Roegadyn and Hrothgar would likely cause pain if their dicks were forced in very deep. Small dicks are generally preferred, unless, like that Hrothgar lady, you're into it. 

Au Ra do not have heats, but do have yearly "mating seasons" when the drive to reproduce is stronger for both sexes, and offspring are more likely to be conceived. Outside of these conditions, Au Ra females enter a period of estivation where their reproductive cycle is suspended. This may lead to decreased interest in non-reproductive sex. Au Ra do not menstruate.

Pregnancy lasts around 5-6 months. Au Ra children are born extremely small, but grow quickly and from one year up until about 10 years of age, tend to be larger than children of the same age in other races.

[three--rings]

When I worked mental health it was a full time salary job with a requirement to also work a certain number of on-call hours. You were either on call for a week, Mon-Thurs evenings from 5PM-8AM or the entire weekend Friday 5PM-Mon 8AM.

You got paid a pittance to hold the pager and a lump sum that was more than time and half if you got called. But you got the same whether the call took you 30 minutes or 8 hours. And when you're arranging for a hospitalization, it was average 5-6 hours to finish one patient. (For utterly dumbfuck bureaucratic reasons but that's another post.)

So you could get a call out every single night Mon-Thurs, if you were unlucky. And what happened to me several times was that I'd get a late call at like 10-11PM, drive to the ER and be there all night until it was time for me to go to my normal work shift at 8am. When I'd been up for more than 24 hours, worked a full day, went home for dinner, and then worked a full night. I was still expected to still do a full 8 hours after the full 24.

I always flat refused and would call my boss and say "nope, I'm done, going home to sleep" and would have to use my sick time just for some time off. Leaving me behind when I did get back to work.

All of that for a total of like $2-3000 extra dollars a year. And this is for a job where you're making life and death decisions about people's safety. It requires not being exhausted to do the job correctly.

At least once I did make a decision that endangered someone because it was 3am and I just was too tired to think straight and wanted to go home (luckily I was able to see the patient the next day and get him help. unfortunately he did end up eventually taking his life.)

And yeah it's WILD that people who are, like, stock brokers are getting their hours rigorously protected and the people ensuring all of our safety are mistreated and forced to work impaired.

Eventually all of the people in my position just up and said "we can't keep doing this", took it to management, told our sob stories, and they made it voluntary and hired contractors to do it. I never worked another on-call shift cause fuck that. (In our case I think it was a system that was put in place when the area was less populated and the call volume was way lower. And also I worked one of the most populous areas with the most calls so got extra fucked.)

Fucking hell why are we making people in hospitals who are responsible for the health and wellbeing of everyone work 12 hour shifts with no breaks I feel like I'm going insane does no one else see the problem here??

[wwehotty]

ONLY LOVE CAN HURT LIKE THIS

By: Dominic Sanchez

You and your bf Alex love to go to places together but one day he seemed off like something was bugging him but he didn’t want to tell you because he didn’t know how so you asked “ hey are you ok is something wrong did I do something wrong” he replied with a quick “ no “ but you knew he was hiding something so then you asked again “ look if there’s something you need to tell me I’m all ea…” then he speaks over you “ actually I do need to tell you something look I don’t know how to say this but I’m cheating on you sorry” your heart breaks you feel like he betrayed you you don’t know how to process this but all you see is him with a suit case and a girl parked outside in a car like she was waiting for him to be done with you and he says is “ bye “ and all you can do is cry all the tears coming down your eyes all you can do is go to your room grab your protection bat and start to break every single thing inside your house you feel so heart broken like someone you loved dearly betrayed you and then you turn on the radio and a song come on “ ONLY LOVE, ONLY LOVE CAN HURT LIKE THIS, ONLY LOVE CAN HURT LIKE THIS MUST HAVE BEEN A DEADLY KISS ONLY LOVE CAN HURT LIKE THIS “ and it plays over and over like this but then things start to take a weird turn because then while the song is playing you start to feel dizzy and you fall on the floor. But then you wake up and you see Alex in your mind your like what the hell is this where am I your in bed with Alex his clothes all off you feel this nice tension between you too you love what’s going on and out of no where his nice long hair falls on your chest you feel his nice muscle hands on you you feel horny and then he puts his big hard cock inside you and you love it you act like none of that stuff even happened then he says “( name) you like what you feel cuz I’m so horny for you love me” and all you can do is mon “ ahh ahh ahh ahh ahh and then you fall asleep you wake up he has breakfast done and your like what the fuck happened here but then you realize wait is he trying to do all this for you to not remember or his he showing a different kind of apology then you go behind him put your hand on his nice muscles and then you meet again with his cock because he’s naked cooking and he says “ babe let’s save that for tonight “ you say “ok can’t wait “ but then you realize that he can’t cook so you ask “ how are you cooking if you can’t he says “ caught me I bought it from a breakfast place” you say ok but then what’s even weirder is that the song that was playing earlier comes on again then he hugs you and you take off your clothes and you guys are dancing naked but then he whispers “ I wish we were actually dancing together “ and you say “ what do you mean” and he says “ you don’t remember I left you and you fell on the ground and died this is all fake you are just imagining what happens to us for the rest of your life “ then you freeze and say “ I’m dead how “ he says from the depression and only ness you got right after it then the song plays again and this time it’s your body laying in the dirt buried and all you can do is just set there and listen to the song only love can hurt like this and a single tear falls from your eyes.

What does this mean are you still alive? Find out on part two of ONLY LOVE CAN HURT LIKE THIS.

[kiwikipedia]

The Dooku Time Travels AU that no one asked for

This is also in its conceptual stage but this is both a Time Traveling Dooku + Dooku doesn’t Fall AU and i have no idea whats going on but it exists.

So basically, Dooku gets killed. Does not enter the force because he is a bad bad man, does not pass go, does not collect 200$.

But the Force is neither good nor bad. The Force holds him, makes him see what he has created by joining with Sidious. So he does.

He watches as his youngest Lineage brother, Kit Fisto, goes with Agen Kolar, Saesee Tiin, and Mace Windu to confront Palpatine. He watches as they're cut down one by one, watches as Anakin betrays Mace and Mace is killed.

Watches one of the finest sword protégés impaled so quickly with a grit out "this doesn't hurt" before the saber was ripped from his chest and Kit and Saesee’s stomachs were slashed open.

Watches as Order 66 is enacted and feels the Jedi being murdered, feels every single one of their deaths, and feels as they pass through the Force because, well, the Force is holding him captive almost to watching.

He witnesses Operation Knightfall, sees another of his Lineage Siblings fall because even though Cin Drallig was great, he was also feeling the deaths as Jedi were betrayed and murdered.

And Dooku might have resented the Order but he never wanted them so brutally genocided like this. even though he knew what the Command Chips were.

Because Dooku didn't want to see the pained looks of betrayal on the face of his Lineage brother and the fear in the eyes of Bene as she was killed.

And the Force holds him still as he watches because "Don't you see? You could have changed things, had you not fallen"

And then everything is thrown backwards. Rippling, branching, and time halts. Dooku wakes in the temple.

It takes him several hours to gather everything and put all he remembers into a comprehensive timeline. He writes it down, stores this in a datapad protected and locked. He checks the date. Qui-Gon and Kit are knighted, no, Qui-Gon should be a Master by now. Kit still had a bit longer— had to train... Bant Eerin, yes, that was the young Mon Cala's name, he had to train her more before he was ascended to Mastership.

Dooku takes some time to reorient himself. Build walls back up, take deep breaths and he steps from his quarters— running directly into Cin Drallig as he's heading down to teach his class on (Dooku has to think, which day is it? Ah, right) Niman for the morning.

And he stiffens.

Cin and Dooku always had an odd sort of relationship. Dooku set the bar too high, Cin had realized that he fallen short of expectations and so he had pushed himself hard. Pushed himself to the point of his hands bleeding as he mastered as many forms of combat as possible before breaking from the Consular path that Yoda had wanted for him. Cin had chosen to become a Sentinel— then a Guardsman— before being pulled to be an instructor.

But Dooku doesn't remember that when he sees Cin— much younger than he remembered him ever being— because all he remembers is the gangly teen from Lavisar asking him for advice a few times, the way his brows furrowed in frustration, and—

And the way his body fell, his saber rolled from his hand, a wild sort of desperation to protect the children, the younglings who were behind him dying as his life left him.

Dooku doesn't hear the disgruntled noise that the younger man makes when he gabs him and pulls him into a hug because they had drifted far apart once Cin had left as a Guard, because Dooku no longer could see Cin as Cin, just as another White and Gold, nameless Mask. But still, Dooku grabs his younger lineage— no. Not just lineage, he swears in his head. His brother.

Because Yan Dooku never wanted the Jedi to be Genocided like that. Never wanted to see the pain, the fear, the anguish in the eyes of the Jedi— many who were just children still.

Cin pushes him away, of course, giving him an odd look but before Dooku can make an excuse on his odd behavior, Cin is already hurrying back down the hall in long strides to get to his class he needs to teach.

So that leaves Dooku to his own devices. He needs to regain himself, center himself, and so he heads down to the Meditation halls— no, perhaps the Room of a Thousand Fountains would be better. Yes, there were many people there, but certainly, there was a strange sort of peace that was better than being alone.

And then there was that secret spot that all the Councilors seemed to collectively know about.

He's hit with another wave of emotion, seeing Plo Koon and Saesee Tiin meditating together, serene as ever, despite the fact that Plo's lap is full of a Preteen Kel Dor. Because once again, he sees Saesee's side torn open in Palpatine's office, and feels the flames and pain and betrayal of Plo Koon's death.

And he sees Tyvokka in the way that Plo holds himself, an unconscious act, shoulders back as he sits with the tiny (Kel Dor really didn't shoot up until they were sixteen standard, did they?) Kel Dor in his lap.

And Dooku misses the academic spats he and the Wookiee would have, because who would have given up the chance to get into a spat with a nearly five hundred year old Jedi Councilor who didn't see you as a son or padawan or whatever?

Plo Koon just never had that same bite as Tyvokka when it came to discussing academia— though Dooku never bothered to try and connect, he realizes.

Still, he doesn't get the chance to escape the room when he realizes who was occupying it.

"The Force around you is like a storm, Master Dooku."

Plo Koon always was formal with everyone he wasn't close to.

"Perhaps, Master Koon"

"Come, sit and center yourself, Master Dooku. As iron sharpens other, so must we assist one another."

Dooku takes the invitation and sits.

"You have not met my niece Sha, yet, have you?" he muses and the tiny Kel dor looks to Dooku.

"I cannot say I have."

"Despite her age, she still enjoys centering herself with an old man like me."

"Ito’sa!"

Dooku finds himself baffled at such an open display of familial love, blinking and his view is skewed again as Saesee just chuckles and shakes his head.

Thus begins the odd sort of friendship that Dooku never expected with Plo Koon, a man who was ages of years his senior, yet still had a penchant for mischief— and taking care of himself poorly when engulfed in grief, he learns.

Because through Plo, he ends up friends with Saesee Tiin, with Shaak Ti, connecting more with his Lineage brothers, actually meeting the Healer Vokara Che. Through Plo Koon he learns that he and Mace Windu aren't too different and that Eeth Koth was very good at making tea and that Saldith was the only sane man in the entire group.

And because of them he puts the name to the Face of Micah Giiett, another of their group and they were close knit, despite their varying ages. But they welcomed Dooku despite it all.

He meets their padawans— meets Bultar Swan, Lissarkh, Bant Eerin— and sees Sha Koon more than he really knew how to deal with because she always glared at him— and he always raised a brow back, before she would seem to decide he was alright and continue on her way.

He sees Agen Kolar— the Padawan of T’ra Saa at that time, but close with the other Padawans— and he is reminded of that saber piercing his chest and he looks away as the Zabrak and Lissarkh bickered.

He meets Voolvif Monn, another of the padawan’s agemates, as he's reluctantly pulled along with the others— a crèche of chaos, Eeth would laugh and say he's glad that he's not Agen's Master, despite Agen being all but his brother. T’ra would end up never being able to fully curb his ‘fight first, questions later’ attitude, but he supposed that was part of the charm.

And he... feels the same pain when Micah dies that the others do. Because somehow he became part of their group of friends. He feels it sharp in his chest as Plo holds tightly to Bultar, she was still just a child, a small thing holding onto her Master’s best friend like a life line.

And Dooku knows now more than ever that he cant fall because no one else would be able to protect this small circle of peace that just had one of its limbs torn off.

And Dooku slowly pulls strings, allowing for Plo to care for both her and Lissarkh— despite the rather unusual act of a Master having two Padawans. But Plo Koon was ancient, and could hold himself decently well, and they all agreed that they would help should he need it— a type of communal teaching.

And he feels that deep sorrow again when Saesee and Plo both return when Voolvif's master, Paouoish Rahhdool, is killed and no one wants to take a Shistavanen to teach. Many others reacted badly to Shistavanens, their predatory appearance put them on edge but gods Voolvif was just a child, quiet and it wasn’t fair to him to be sent away because of his master’s death.

Dooku never wanted to take another padawan. he fears it even more now. But he knows Voolvif because he's seen the pup take down droids without a problem in the Outer Rim. And he knows... Voolvif took his own training into his own hands in the other timeline. Stood on his own feet and refined himself and became a Knight even while he bounced from one master to the next with no permanent solution.

Dooku never wanted another padawan after Qui-Gon, but he finds himself attaching beads in the form of a braid to Voolvif's fur.

Dooku does not stop Syfo Dias, because in all honesty, he forgot.

While he maintained their friendship in this second chance it... was not as strong.

Instead, Dooku sparred relentlessly with Shaak Ti who was much more vicious than he remembered her being, he locked sabers with Saldith and Eeth Koth, and combatted Mace and Cin's varying forms of Juyo.

He scolds Kit when he beats him, training him even farther than Yoda and Cin had, much to Cin's amusement as Kit picks himself up again with a huff. He learns that Saesee Tiin is as stubborn as a bantha when he choses not to do something, and that includes duels.

He is startled when, in a secluded, private, sparring chamber as green lightning arcs across Plo Koon's skin, as Vokara rolls her eyes and Dooku is flat on his back because telling Plo Koon that he wanted a real fight was something of a danger.

Because he forgot that the man was a Baran Do Sage as well.

And, so he forgets that Syfo Dias goes to commission the Clones.

Because at the same time, he's watching with a flat expression as Kit pursues Plo Koon and as Saesee and Shaak somehow convince Cin into their little group and shakes his head as Mace and Eeth laugh lightly together. And he introduces Saldith and Vokara to his very expensive alcohol tastes as they complain about their love-struck idiot friends.

And Saldith gripes that Sha is spending a bit too long looking after that blind padawan of the Togorian Master, Syu'Mirkko, and Dooku has never been more grateful that Voolvif prefered to sleep in a patch of sun instead of giving into flirting because, ugh, teenagers and their feelings. He remembered enough about Qui-Gon pinning after Tahl to really never want to deal with that again.

And for a little bit... for a bit, Dooku can forget that a war is looming like a bloody shadow— he can forget that war will have changed because he's not there to bring everyone to Geonosis. But he has no idea who is going to be

For a little bit he can forget.

And then Qui-Gon is killed.

And Dooku feels the death like he just got hit by one of Coruscant's passenger trains.

But this time there are others who can help him, get him back on his feet. There's Shaak Ti, and Eeth Koth, and Saldith who lost their padawans, there's Plo Koon who has lived through ages of loss, taking it without falling, there's Cin Drallig who has faced deep rooted grief when a Gaurd takes their own life because they cant stand it anymore, there’s Vokara Che whose felt lives slip through her fingers, Mace Windu who clenched his teeth and prayed to god that Depa didn't fall, and Saesee Tiin and Kit Fisto who have watched all of this, and helped all of them through it— and would help him too.

So Dooku grips tightly to the hands outstretched to him, clawing his way up when he feels the whispers of Palpatine's force on Naboo, trying to drag him further down. Trying to entice him into the dark, but he grips onto their hands and hauls himself up from the grief, and grabs Voolvif and holds the usually touch adverse Shistavanen tight for a moment because fuck that could've been him— could be him in the future and Dooku doesn’t want to think about that.

And even in grief, Dooku knows what he has to do and he talks to them— talks to Shaak Ti, to Plo Koon, to Saesee Tiin, to Eeth Koth, to Mace Windu. Because Obi-Wan cannot train Anakin. Obi-Wan needs to heal, not get thrown into the overbearing realization that he needs to train a child. He hasn't even led a clan group yet.

There is talk on who can take Anakin, when he is ready. Plo Koon will not, Dooku knows. The man was pulling double with Lissarkh and Bultar. They will be knight soon, yes, but he cannot do it. Saldith won't do it either, it would be a poor fit, and Vokara won't, because Anakin won't want to be a healer— and even so, Bant Eerin will be transferring to the Halls after she's knighted. Vokara will have to look after her then. Kit was ascended to master half way through Bant's training but even he deserves a break. Cin needed to be free for Serra, or the child would be sent to the Agricorps, Dooku knows, and—

"My uncle has not taken a Padawan in ages. He fears leading them to their deaths. Perhaps... this can break that fear."

"You wish to use Skywalker to break your Uncle's fear of padawans, Master Koon."

"Not in such a harsh matter, Master Dooku, I am simply suggesting that they can help each other. My Uncle is wise and patient, and Anakin is a strong boy. They will balance one another. Unless you have another option?"

Dooku knows nothing about the mysterious Fae Koon. Just that he and Tyvokka were... a thing but he never quite managed to meet the Kel Dor despite his not-quite friendship with the ancient Wookiee.

Their First meeting is strange, when he joins Plo in asking the other to take Anakin when he is ready.

"You're the one who argued with my Aat-kaevde so often."

"I— yes?"

"He means Master Tyvokka, Master Dooku."

"I... see..."

And at first, Fae Koon is reluctant to agree. He has not taken a Padawan in so long— he trained five total but only two reached Knighthood, and none lived much longer than that. But he agrees with the promise of their help because it has been a very long time, of course. And Plo agrees— only for them to later find out that it was unneeded because T’ra Saa, Tholme, Yarael Poof, Oppo Rancisis, Yaddle, and Fay (who came back from the Outer Rim, just for this) ended up all pitching in, wither or not the Eldest of the Koons wanted them to or not.

A group of Ancients and Tholme, Plo would remark with a chuckle and Dooku feels himself relax— just a bit.

The fact remained that the War would be upon them in a few years. And he had no idea who would be on Geonosis, still.

But for a little bit he can forget again, as they all pile into his quarters laughing because their Padawans— their weird little children— were Knights. They smile and laugh and talk and Dooku has no qualms about sharing his selections of Alcohols and maybe Dooku ends up under Vokara and Saldith with Eeth's legs thrown over his as Mace and him curl up together, and maybe Kit and Plo have slipped away sometime during the night, and maybe Saesee and Shaak Ti have Cin between them but in the morning he can forget. Just for a bit.

And when the time approaches, Dooku steels himself.

And then the rug is pulled out from under him when instead of Kenobi being sent to investigate the assassin, Voolvif goes— tracks him to Kamino and fuck Dooku knew he forgot something.

And then when Mace calls them all together because Voolvif is trapped on Geonosis. And two hundred and sixteen Jedi go— the original two-hundred and twelve, but this time Kenobi and Anakin and Fae are there, this time Dooku is along side of them, this time Cin Drallig rolls his shoulders and sets off with a grim expression.

Dooku... doesn't expect to see Ky Narec where he once stood.

And the battle for Geonosis is bloody, even more so now that Dooku is down on the field, but Kit and Cin are right along side of him, and he shakes his head because he forgot how much of a monster Cin could be in battle. Because he forgot how much more in-tune lineages tended to be when fighting with their members, the damage created in their wake.

It still isn’t enough, though.

Coleman is still shot down by Jango, and Dooku knows he couldn't change that. He just couldn't get there in time. Mace still kills Jango. He knows that Boba was watching and braces himself for the future.

And still, even with all of them there, they're routed, surrounded and Dooku just keeps his head high, knowing that Yoda was on his way. Yoda, Saldith, and Eeth Koth were gathering the Clones and he had to trust in them.

He thinks Ky's monologue is worse than his own had been and his heart aches because gods he saw Agen kneel down, close the eyes of Tan Yuster as Bultar and Voolvif stand ready to deflect any shots towards their friend.

But the Clones arrive, and Dooku grasps the arm outstretched to him— a clone whose name he would have to learn, he supposed. And the battle outside of the arena is still bloody, but he doesn't falter. He fights, deflects, and survives.

And the Clone Wars begins. Many battles go unchanged, even with Dooku's arrival, he realizes. Muunilinst, the outer rim, and Hypori.

And it's tense, not knowing if Shaak Ti and Aayla Secura would pull through, even when K’kruhk shows back up.

But there is some brightness in the dark. Dooku knows that Palpatine cant get to Anakin because he’s not on the front with the 501st, that fell to Sha to lead and she was doing magnificent.

Instead, Anakin was running strike missions with Fae still, still a Padawan but due to be knighted soon. And Palpatine can’t get his hands on him because he’s always protected by a Baran Do Sage far older than the one that Dooku claims as a friend.

And Ahsoka as a padawan, but Bultar Swan takes her instead. And Dooku shakes his head, knowing that his plans for Voolvif to take Ahsoka were foiled when he sees Plo’s smug look. He lets the other have his small victory.

And then Dooku knows what's next.

He feels what's to come and he grabs Plo's arm as he and the 104th prepare to disembark. He can't stop them from going, but perhaps he can save some more lives.

"Be careful. Contact Sha or Fae should your communications go out."

"Master Dooku, if I didn't know better I would've thought you were worried."

Cheeky Kel Dor.

"Master Koon, if you've forgotten, you and my brother happen to be... together. I would hate for Kit to get mopey."

And of course, despite that, Dooku contacts the Muunilinst 10, meets them before they depart to join them in going to Abregado

"Because I have a bad feeling, Commander Fordo"

"Whatever you say, General Dooku, we’ll follow.”

Many lives are still lost in the wake of the Ion Canon, but Plo pushes through and sends a distress call to Sha through their familial telepathic bond, and she contacts Dooku as he and the Muunilinist 10 are already on their way.

Dooku doesn't know how Plo managed to do it the first time, but he isn't taking chances this time.

Two more pods full of clones are rescued, along with Plo and the original three. And it’s more than Dooku could hope for as they remain silent and waiting for Grievous to bypass them. Silent, waiting, tense.

Dooku pretends not to hear the call between Plo and Kit when they're back in safe space, reluctantly joins Lissarkh's strike team against the Malevolence to make way for Obi-Wan and Roron Corrob's Star-Destroyers in order to protect the injured clones.

The Glade Company are very skilled skilled pilots, Dooku finds even in the face of the Neebray Mantas. Which turns out to be because its not the first time that Lissarkh and the Glade Company have done this and—

"What do you mean you've been using these old smuggler's runs to get across the Galaxy, Lissarkh"

"Master Plo, it's faster and we're a small company. We've managed so far"

"I swear to the Spirits, if it's not Sha or Bultar, it's you causing me to loose years of my life...."

Dooku just chuckles under his breath, because even in war Plo and his former Padawans still have that light and heart to joke around.

Still, Lissarkh is perceptive, able to destroy the Malevolence with just a bit of quick thinking. And Dooku marks another major event he changed off. He's not holding his breath for an early end to the war though, not unless he chooses to go off the rails and murder Palpatine.

And The Lair of Grievous?

Dooku struggles to remember who else could possibly go along with Nahdar before suggesting to Cin that Serra get out on the field again and join Kit because it'll be good practice. Cin is uncertain, but Serra goes, and three Jedi are there when Grievous shows up. And really, the poor guy has a Bad Day because Serra is... Serra.

Kit is both parts terrified and amused as he watches as Serra kicks Nahdar out of the way of a blaster shot and engages Grievous herself.

But things all end well. Mostly. Grievous escaped— again.

And the war keeps going.

And in the final fight, instead of Saesee and Agen, Mace brings the Lineage Trio— because Dooku, Kit, and Cin fighting together is terrifying.

Because instead of Obi-Wan, Agen and Eeth have gone with the 212th to Utapau, because Agen has been itching to confront Grievous and Eeth didn’t leave the Order this time.

And Palpatine would not win easy, not with Dooku filled with hidden rage at both his betrayal at getting beheaded and for ordering the genocide of the Order. Not with Kit Fisto's blood singing to destroy the Sith. Not with Cin Drallig who has stood by as the head of the Guard, watching as more and more Jedi returned to the Temple to be entombed.

Palpatine would not win easily with the three falling into well practiced forms, into a familiar dance with Mace and even through Lightning and darkness, they slagged through.

And Four masters walked into Palpatine's office, grim and determined, and four masters left, laughing because gods Dooku felt high on the light of the force for the first time in a while, leaning on Mace as his brothers staggered and leaned against each other, as the Coruscant Guard rushed over to see what was wrong.

But the four of them just laughed and staggered back to the temple after telling Commander Fox to secure the area. Saesee greeting them with raised brows as Shaak laughs at their states and Vokara sighs and drags them to the halls of healing while Saldith organizes the Guard and Shadows to go with him and investigate the office for anything that could be used as evidence against Palpatine. And the others are called back from the front, because without Palpatine, things crumble.

Plo and all of their once padawans come to the Halls, Yoda and Obi wan and Fae and Anakin too, and Cin grunts that he really hates being known as a hero once Shaak cheekily tells them that they're going to be attending some senate gathering as heores of the Republic.

And Dooku just shakes his head, falling back against the bed with a chuckle because its all fine now. Palpatine's gone. He can relax. Sure there was clean up, but he could relax. And the Force hummed as he fell back into sleep, to the noise of Ahsoka, Bene, and Baylis Archan laughing, and Bant Eerin scolding Kit for jarring his injuries.

The Force hummed and he knows that he did good despite his actions in the past.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ there is no timeline because i moved Micah's death forwards if i ever write this for real though i'll fix that

[dreamdropxoxo]

Maybe my soulmate died

Warnings: Major Character Death, Hurt No Comfort, Sad Ending

Read at own discretion. 

Nikandros dreaded every single battle during the war. He knew, he shouldn’t. After all he was a warrior, he was a proud Akielon and his prince trusted him to have his back. Yet, nothing could change the words written in a beautiful cursive on his forearm.

“Promets-moi d'épargner mon frère.”

Every time he killed a Veretian soldier, he couldn’t stop the panic from gripping his heart in a vice like grip. What if he had just killed his soulmate? Luckily even through the madness that was the battle of Marlas, the words stayed there, black and strong on his dark skin. He checked them whenever he got a break from the bloodshed to catch his breath.

And then they were forgotten the moment he saw Damen face off against the Veretian crown prince. Auguste of Vere was a legend even in Akielos. During the war it had become more than obvious that the crown prince was the only thing standing between Delpha and the Akielons. He was a great commander and an outstanding fighter. Not even Damianos could outmanoeuvre him and Damen was rumoured to be blessed by the God of war. The man didn’t even back down when the news of the Veretian king’s death spread all over the battlefield. He stood strong and called order to his men, strengthening the formation within minutes despite having a father to mourn.

As a result, it was understandable that Nikandros’ blood ran cold when he saw the two heirs face off against each other. Around them the fighting had stopped, Damianos and the Veretian heir both commanding their men to stand back. Damianos looked like he had bathed in blood, his curls stuck to his head with a mixture of sweat and blood from where he had lost his helmet sometime ago. Nik had given him his own but Damen had lost that one a few minutes later too and since that moment Nik had spent all of his time to protect the prince’s head from stray arrows. He really didn’t want to witness said head being severed from his best friend’s shoulders by the Veretian crown prince, who was now king. Auguste of Vere looked every inch the warrior he was said to be. Blond hair sweaty and in disarray, but his eyes were attentive, sharp like a hawk’s. He had a good built, obviously shaped to be a capable warrior, he moved with sureness and agility. The golden starburst on his chest plate was the only thing distinguishing him from his men. There was nothing arrogant about him, only well-deserved confidence, that much was obvious from his soldiers' reactions to him. The prince offered his helmet to one of his commanders who obviously tried to protest but was shut up by a sharp, “C'est une question d’honneur.”

“Only our swords, Damianos,” he promised in accented Akielon.

“Yes, Your Majesty,” Damianos agreed, making a show of un-sheeting his sword. Nik wanted to interfere and tell him how foolish all of this was. He would get himself killed and Nikandros would have to watch. Auguste was shorter than Damianos, but not by much and while his reach might be impacted, he was without a doubt in his prime as a fighter. Damen on the other hand was still a youth, only just starting his prime. He lacked experience. Experience which the Veretian prince certainly had.

Nik felt like throwing up. For the first time since the fighting had begun, he thought about running away. But by then it was too late and sword clashed against sword. The Veretian heir was even better than Nikandros had expected. He was powerful and clever. And then it happened, Damen stumbled and his sword fell. The horror at that sight made Nik clench his jaw so hard it hurt. This would be the moment he saw his best friend die.

“Pick up your sword. I won’t kill a defenseless man.” The blond man stopped in his assault and waited until Damen was back on his feet. Nik’s heart skipped a beat. He could only gape at the Veretian prince. Weren’t Veretians deceitful and without honour? Auguste could have put an ending to the fight, to the whole war, with one strike of his sword, but he didn’t. Nik stared at him for so long that he realised how tired the man looked. Dark rings under his blue eyes and the pallor of his face, which seemed to be more a sign of exhaustion than of a naturally fair complexion betrayed the stubborn tilt of his chin and sure grip of his sword. He still moved beautifully, more beautiful than any soldier Nik had ever seen, but it grew apparent that he wasn’t at his best, every swing looking a bit less effortless.

And then— then happened what was unavoidably bound to happen. The fight came to an end. Damianos’ sword buried in the young king’s chest. The blond man dropped his sword, swayed on his feet and fell. Nik didn’t know why there was no feeling of triumph. He had no idea why pure horror washed over him. He broke formation and ran towards the man.

In retrospect he was surprised nobody killed him on the spot but in that moment he only had eyes for the Veretian man lying in the dirt, sword piercing his chest, blood pooling under him. He reached him, not knowing why he was even moving.

Blue eyes met his for the first time, pain and devastation in them.

“Promets-moi d'épargner mon frère.”

Nik didn’t understand a lot of Veretian, but he knew those words. Coldness gripped his hear. He ignored the hands trying to pull him away, the angry Veretian voices shouting at him.

“Please, no, by the Gods. Please don’t die,” he pleaded pressing his hand on the wound, blood welling up between his fingers. Those blue eyes widened and then there was a smile, looking horrifying with the blood coating pale lips.

“Oh, c'est toi.” A cough, more blood. “Je suis content d'avoir pu vous rencontrer à la fin.”

Nik had no idea what he was saying. He just knew that if this man died his own life would be over. Another cough. It sounded terrible. There were no more hands trying to make him move. No more voices. Everything was eerily silent.

“No. No, no, nononono.” Nik gripped his soulmate’s shoulder. “You can’t leave me.”

“Désolé.” And then it was over. Auguste of Vere was dead. Nik knew because he could see the words leaving his forearm as if they had never existed. All the fight left his body. He kneeled beside his soulmate’s corpse, his blood coating his hand and legs and he couldn’t move. He considered throwing himself onto his own sword just to make the horrible feeling of emptiness stop, but he had no energy left.

“Please, kill me,” he whispered, pleaded, with anyone who might hear. Oh, how he wished he would have been the one dying first. Had he just been a little less careful, a little less lucky, he would have been spared this pain. “Please, make it stop."

Read also here.

Translation:

“Promets-moi d'épargner mon frère.” - "Promise me to spare my brother." “C'est une question d’honneur.” - "It's a matter of honor." “Oh, c'est toi.” - "Oh, it's you." “Je suis content d'avoir pu vous rencontrer à la fin.” - "I'm glad I got to meet you in the end." “Désolé.” - "I'm sorry."

[smhalltheurlsaretaken]

"The prequels Jedi were corrupt," is something I've just stumbled upon, again.

How are they though? How? I want an example, a single example of corruption.

Do they take bribes? No they don't, not that we ever see. What would they even do with bribes? They don't pursue material wealth.

Do they influence politicians to gain power? Lol, Riyo Chuchi almost bosses Obi-Wan Kenobi, member of the High Council, around and only backs down because he makes a reasoned argument she agrees with. Padmé Amidala is literally the only politician we see getting influenced by a Jedi to a Jedi's benefit (*cough* Anakin diverting her from her duties *cough*). The Council systematically gets shut down when they try to get something from the Senate (like when they try to get Palpatine not to bring the Zillo beast to Coruscant - Obi-Wan and Padmé *do* ask Anakin to speak to Palpatine, and it does precisely nothing.)

Do they accept a corrupt leadership? In a sense but they don't benefit from it (since most of the Senate doesn't trust them, drafted them into a war they never wanted to be part of, and essentially forces them to send their teenagers into battle because they are stretched so thin) which makes all the difference. They don't enable the corrupt system because it profits them, they support it because the alternatives they have are worse (the Separatists during TCW, who are backed by mega corporations like the Commerce Guild, Techno Union and Trade Federation, and who enslave the Twi'Lek, the Mon Calamari and the Togruta onscreen, just for starters, and use weapons of mass destruction like the Malevolence or that defoliator thing they almost test on the Lurmen when Republic weapons are specifically made not to target organic beings - see the Zillo beast arc) and because the Senate has the authority to order the Jedi to kick people out (Ahsoka) or to drop investigations (Maul in s4, Kamino in s6), and can declare them all traitors. The Jedi don't have the means to go against the whole Republic, and frankly making sure politicians aren't corrupt should primarily be the job of the billions of citizens, not theirs (the 10000~ space monks who have kids to raise and Sith Lords to deal with and would very much like to spend their days meditating and being nerds ("I was going to study that!") and helping people.)

Do they lie to their subordinates to get more power? The Council doesn't lie about its beliefs, and its members actively practice what they preach (letting go of things, staying in control of yourself, protecting the helpless...) so no manipulation there, and while they do lie or cover up things from time to time it's never to achieve power or to benefit themselves directly. The Rako Hardeen act? They lie to save the Supreme Chancellor of the Republic, who, as far they know at this point, is their legitimate Commander-in-Chief. OpSec isn't corruption. They cover up the discovery that Dooku made the Clone Army to protect the Clones themselves (as stated by Yoda) and because the public would freak out and then they'd have a civil war on top of a galactic war to deal with. It doesn't benefit them, exactly, because they explicitly say they're not happy about the decision but don't see another way out. ("The right path, no. The only path.") Oh, and Obi-Wan literally tells Rex, Ahsoka and Bo-Katan about Sidious, because the Jedi aren't secretive as a rule. They share intel easily if it'll help people.

Do they seek power in any way? Ffs, when they go against Palpatine – the Sith Lord who orchestrated an entire and forced hundreds of them to for in it, along with hundreds of thousands of Clones and millions of civilians – Mace tried to arrest him twice in the name of the Senate. "In the name of the Galactic Senate, you're under arrest" and after Palpatine kills three Council members "you're under arrest, my Lord." He only tries to kill him without a trial after Sheev blasts him full of lightning for like two freaking minutes. Talk about a coup. (By the way, arresting the Commander-in-Chief of your armies when you have proof of his own corruption, when he has given himself control over the banks (Clovis arc), gotten more emergency powers (RotS), holds power over the courts (Wrong Jedi arc) and has stayed in office for longer than his term? That's not corruption, that's actively fighting fascism.)

You could argue that Obi-Wan sending troops to Mandalore is a misuse of power, but there's a Sith Lord there who could potentially tell them the identity of Sidious and this help end the war. Also, it doesn't benefit him directly since it puts Ahsoka in danger, it divides his fleet and it could get him in trouble since he didn't make the operation a secret in any way. The one time Obi-Wan does go to Mandalore for his own benefit, he does it without backup and without even using Republic property since he borrows Anakin's ship.

So maybe the Jedi are corrupt because they distort their old ideals and preach a false image of the Force? They are corrupt in the sense that they are stagnant and the Dark Side corrupted them? But... Yoda is the Order's greatest critic (see AotC) which points to self-awareness, as he's one of their most important leader, the "fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate to suffering" credo is literally how Lucas describes the Force working (see @gffa 's collection of quotes) so they are narratively correct on most of their doctrines (same goes for attachment as Lucas defines it, in opposition to love), and Yoda and Obi-Wan the quintessential Jedi are deemed worthy of immortality by non-Jedi entities. The Jedi constantly talk about how hard war is because it's against who they are at their very core ("we are keepers of the peace, not soldiers," "we are peace keepers," "unfortunately war tends to distort our point of view; if we sacrifice our ideals, even for victory, we may lose that which is most important, our honor," etc) and every decision they take is motivated by the need to protect civilians and the Order. They don't join the war, they get drafted. Hear that, Rebels!Yoda? This is why I base my understanding of Star Wars on the movies and TCW alone, aka Lucas' canon. I swear, idk wrote that part about "the Jedi joining the conflict swiftly in their arrogance" but that's not what happens in the movies. They literally go save a high profile politician and two of their own from unlawful execution and try to arrest Dooku for being a terrorist (he hired people to kill a political opponent) and a threat to the safety of the Republic (he's literally manufacturing entire armies and talking about going to war), and 200 of them get slaughtered for it, and then they get drafted as Generals despite having no military expertise and they can't say no because again, the Senate can (and would) label them as traitors, and if they don't fight the Clones have people like Tarkin leading them. (You know, just the guy who later commits genocide on a whole planet.)

Seriously, I want one, just one concrete example of the PT Order/Council being corrupt, because it's such a common accusation that surely it must be grounded in canon somehow. Right? Right?

[not-poignant]

Have to say, I am fully Team Kadek here. Like, everyone is just lucky that it was Augus they ran into, who has committed enough abuse of his own that he could bounce back from running into Ef. Suppose one of the young women who Ef molested (digitally raped?) had been there? Sure, Ef can't avoid every supermarket in the same city he shares with his victims, but a club dealing with sexual intimacy and vulnerability?! I'm definitely associating myself more with Kadek than anyone else in that room.

Suppose one of the young women who Ef molested (digitally raped?)

I just want to be clear: Efnisien never digitally raped anyone. He groped people by putting his hand flat over their underwear (only ever getting as far as - and wanting to get as far as - resting his palm over their mons pubis), and never penetrated any of his victims, in any way, with any part of his body.

That doesn't make it okay, but he was not a rapist. There was never any digital rape. The most contact he made was with the palm of his hand, and he did not want to penetrate anyone at all. Definitely molestation, but yeah, what people have assumed Efnisien has done, and what he has said he has done, does not line up - in any way - with his memories of what he has done, and his intrusive thoughts have contradicted his actual feelings about any kind of sexual act.

The only orifice he's ever willingly stuck his fingers inside of re: penetration, was the knife wounds that Crielle created herself, when he opened his stitches and tried to feel his own intestinal tract and organs. Though I wouldn't put him past being curious about his own ass, and then potentially finding it too difficult to do.

Even canon Efnisien isn't a rapist. This carries over to human Efnisien pretty much from the canon, but for different reasons. It's one of the reasons it was in some ways so easy for Crielle to protect Efnisien for his actions, because they could never under most legal definitions, be counted as 'serious sexual assault.' A single groping that was never repeated by a teenager is - sadly - something that the courts are likely to dismiss. Again, doesn't make it right! But I think it is an important distinction, because it speaks to Efnisien's psychology re: why he was doing what he was doing and why he couldn't actually go any further.

who has committed enough abuse of his own that he could bounce back from running into Ef.

This...is a strange statement.

Being abusive does not make it easier to take abuse. Case in point: Efnisien, to be honest. But also Augus not being able to take abuse as a child, is a huge part of why he became so abusive in the first place. Augus developed a very strong 'kill or be killed' perspective. And he was validated for his malice and his sadism.

But even outside of writing, it's just completely wrong that people who have committed abuse suddenly develop a magical ability to be able to take it?

The reason Augus found Efnisien so easy to deal with, and did not find the experience traumatising was:

1. He held complete authority over Efnisien who he's just seen safeword, and who is clearly, visibly terrified. 2. Efnisien never fought him back or indicated he would fight back which made Augus keep escalating his violent and abusive behaviour. 3. Augus enjoys revenge - see: 'the entire start of Spoils of the Spoiled' and the premise that gets Augus and Gwyn in the same room. Augus isn't 'traumatised' that Gwyn broke his brother's nose, he's incensed, and immediately plans to disproportionately and maliciously destroy Gwyn's life. 4. He's a sadist with anger management issues and almost no capacity for remorse for anyone who he doesn't care for, regardless of what that person has done (see: all the innocent students he blackmailed during Spoils) 5. He has a strong and supportive network. He has an adoptive parent and many sisters who love and adore him. He has a brother who looks up to him and loves him. He has a partner who thinks he's amazing, is a millionaire, and offered to casually buy him a house. He's financially secure not just now, but for the rest of his life. This - more than anything else - along with knowing he held power over Efnisien, was what helped him 'bounce back' and enjoy the experience as a malicious person who does veer towards revenge fantasies.

6. He got to literally act out a revenge fantasy via felony grievous bodily harm, and no one stopped him, and the person he did that to thanked him, advocated for him, and then left the room.

But yeah I'd just like to say to anyone reading this that being abusive is not miraculous armour against bouncing back from trauma. That's not an idea that I support, and it also has no medical evidence to support it, and it's kind of dangerous to even put that out into the world, imho.

But at any rate, Falling Falling Stars is a great fictional example of the many reasons why being abusive doesn't guarantee anything at all re: bouncing back from abuse or trauma. And then additionally, Augus was not particularly traumatised re: encountering Efnisien.

*

But other than that I 100% agree with you that Kadek did the right thing.

If Arden had used the pragmatic and smart part of his brain, he would never suggest that Efnisien go there in the first place, and if Efnisien had researched the rules himself (instead of assuming they were like the play parties) he would never have gone. Unfortunately Efnisien is now very much experiencing the consequences of Arden's arrogant oversight and forgetfulness re: the rules. There's no part of the story that's going to suggest Efnisien go back to a kink club.

[thesolotomyhan]

ramon arellano felix as a dad would include

a/n: heyy mis carinos youre favorite clown is back with something none of you guys asked yet here i am sharing this with you all i was soft but also because i havent written anything for my arellano boys in a minute and i got inspired wow anyways i hope you guys enjoy my desmadre

taglist: @fandomnerd16​ @visintaes​ @sheeshgivemeabreak​ @artemiseamoon​ @umvirgo​ @redhairedace 

let me know if you want to be tagged! 

ok right off i want to mention ME MUERO imagining ramon with the mini versions of himself

like he would be the fun dad thats always playing with his kids and always wanting to be around them constantly :(

but also my heart hurts imagining this ball of emotions being so happy about having kids with you

like i cant with the thought of him in the very moment you tell him youre pregnant-

like this soft ass moment where hes just in disbelief,, holding your face- “embarazada? de verdad princesa?”

i just- him being so excited,, wanting to hear you say it again and again before he picks you up from so much excitement :((

wow would not even hold back before hes already walking you both over to announce it to all his siblings :(

and like enedina would be the most excited because you know she would :( and i just have a feeling dina is going to go all the fucking way to be the consentida aunt :((

wow? um she definitely gives me the vibes of her always being around you to make sure your ok,, making sure you and her little niece/nephew have everything available to you within arms reach-

because she adores you with mon :(

but also ramon being constantly worried about you when hes not with you even tho he knows youre the safest person breathing in mexico

and because he knows dina is there with you all the time puts him a little at ease-

like omg if something,, even the slightest look,, happens to you or your kid, he would shoot up all of tijuana becasue no one touches his familia- his overprotectiveness goes through the roof- i

i am crying at the thought of him always kneeling down and talking to your stomach,, like that is a daily thing he does all the time-

like :(( imagine him doing it right after you told him your pregnant or something :( i-

no but also because the very fucking moment he knew about his kids existence in you,, he would give up his crack usage :/

todo porque he wants to be the best dad figure for his kids :((

like he vows to that shit even more once he had his kid in his arms- excuse me let me go cry,,

im sorry this is supposed to be a dad hc yall im starting to get carried away-

BUt WOw i cant even explain the way i go soft imagining this cabron as a dad with his kids :((

because you know what i thought of that first came to mind?

UM NIEVE DATES WITH HIS KIDS ANYONE???

where he for sure would always give into them whenever they ask if they can get some ice cream for breakfast or something-

he would probably have his kids pinky promise to him to not tell you anything about skipping meals just to have an ice cream cone :((

and like having them happily eating their ice cream while he picks them up and sets them on his hip :((((

i am sorry,, but you cannot tell me park visits are not a thing right after having ice cream:(

like the thought of him pushing his kids on the swing set :(( or going on the slide with them is breaking my heart- :((

but ramon also being extra af with protectiveness with his kids :(

like him making sure everything and anything that could hurt his kids in anyway,, hes moving his kids away from them-

:(would make sure his mens guns and his own guns are away from his kids sights-

and moving a whole bunch of dangerous things away like in hard to reach places so his babies dont even get the glimpse of danger :((

all because he would never forgive himself if something he could have prevented hurts his ninos :(wow

:((((( AH he would love styling his kids hair all the TIME

omg i fucking cant at the thought of him having a daughter and loving to braid or putting his daughters hair in these little pigtails??? :(((

like him sitting her on his lap in the morning,, the both of them watching some kids show on the tv as hes just gently as fucking possible brushing her hair out :((( why do i do this to my s e lf

and he would like,, give her a little kiss to his ninas head like “mi princesa hermosa,, la mas guapa de la casa” :( WOW

or if he has a son,, the mini fucking version of him and dressing him up in those pinshis camisas :((

im just- holding in my tears imagining ramon being the dad that would love to bathe his kids :((

and like him having all these toys for them too,, playing with them all the time just to make his kids laugh-

fuckk- he would definitely do that cute shit where he would gather bath bubbles in his hands and place them on top of his kids hair :(( no one look at me

him def being the dad to like,, burrito wrap his kids in towels after their baths :(( carrying them around the house while they dry :(((

bro? picking out their clothes?? for them to wear?? because he has style??? :((((( im sorry

would always be seen walking around with his kids sitting on top of his shoulders when theyre old enough-

like my mon is a toll bby and his kids love getting upsies from him beacuse of that :(

wow would this one loving blowing all his fucking money if it means his kids have the best birthday party in all of mexico even if its like their first birthday loL

just christmas and birthdays especially being a mf highlight for him because he buys so much presents for them to have

decorating the house from top to bottom,, every year it’s somehow better than the last-

ok but also him buying everything and anything for his kids when he’s out with them

like before his kid even finishes their sentence that they want some car toy on the shelf

his ass is already shoving it into the cart because his little angels will get ANYTHING their little hearts desire ok?

i laugh because you probably scold him at times that he’s spoiling them too much

but he’s always on defense like “mi amor,, dime como les puedo decir que no a estas caritas preciosas????” :(( like low key tho he loves consintiendo his kids because he cant help it :(

oh my god??? you know what just attacked my mind that it made me start bawling??

the fact that mi ramon would love dancing nortenas with his kid/ daughter :((((((((

OR THE FACT THAT HE WOuld love taking you to bailes-

dancing with you all pegaditos to banda or nortenas,,, tu by los elegantes de jerez anyone??

AND HAVING HIS FUCKING KID IN BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU :(((

im definitely not in the club crying my soul out at the thought of him kissing the top of his kids head and then you-

his stupid smile and heart eyes as he leans his forehead on yours and tells you “como te adoro princesa, por darme la mejor bendicion de mi vida” :(( someone pls come hug me

no :( i swear all i do is hurt myself because get this-

like do you guys remember when miguel angel killed off mi amor gueritos family?? holy shit could you imagine the way ramon would go fucking frantic to make sure that doesnt happen to his own family :(((

i kid you not he would go through anything to make sure you and his kids dont even get a single little piece of hair touched-

like im almost positive ,, family man ramon would fucking THREATEN to the max if miguel angel even looks or breathes in tijuanas direction-

wOW like when all the plazas got together and left in s2

and miguel angel saying some shit like “con cuidadito eh,, dicen que en tijuana anda bien peligroso,, no quiero que nada le pasa a esa hermosa familia que tienes, ramon”- ALL FUCKI NG SMUG WHILE MIGUEL THREATEN S HIM AND THE TJ BOYS FOR LEAVNI G-

good god- and ramon not hesitating for a second to try and pull his gun out,, all heated- im sorry for bringing that thought up

but overall just such a soft, overprotective family dad whos always going to be there making you and his kids as happy as possible :((

[misfit-fics]

Demon Rehab For Dummies

Summary: (Y/N) started seeing seven demons when she was 10. Through the years they all disappeared, all but one. Namjoon. A demon who has not so creepily, creepily, very creepily been in love with her for years.

Genre: fluff, crack, extremely minimal angst, idiots to lovers, romantic-comedy

Word count: 7384

Rating: Teen

Warnings: mentions of suggestive & kinky themes, a handful of cursing, a story with a plot but not doesn’t exactly have a plot, a stubborn (Y/N) who dismisses love confessions & genuine flirting, an unspoken confession

A/N: Hey! we're back, it's been a while. We're starting school in a while but it will be gamble if we'll be more active or not. Well... we ARE active but just not posting? Yeah, you know what I mean. This has been sitting in our drafts for a while now and we're posting it now... although it's pretty unedited, feel free to address any oopsies. Hope who ever finds this enjoys reading!

At the ripe young age of ten (Y/N) began seeing seven men. Which- would’ve (should’ve) freaked any kid out but you know (Y/N) is just kinda quirky like that so she didn't really mind much. The men were nice and played with her anyway, and the only weird thing was that sometimes they would bring her dead birds.

At age eleven (Y/N) noticed that one of the men was missing.It didn’t affect her much except for the fact that this particular one would help her find things and she’d lost almost all of her socks since he disappeared. Not to mention the increase of bug bites after he left. The darn things seemed like they multiplied exponentially after a month.

By twelve only two of the men had disappeared, at this point (Y/N) not only lived in sandals (she still couldn’t find her socks) but she also couldn’t explain why her hair was burning off every time she tried to straighten it (her lil demon friends didn’t want her to, you’d think after almost 3 years of having men following her around and telling her what to do she’d get with the program already.) Her dog her parents had given her when she was 9 started disappearing quite often after he left. He always came back with a single sock that would disappear the next morning.

By thirteen (Y/N) had developed a crush (more like unhealthy obsession) on one of the men, Namjoon. The third year was also the year when Jimin disappeared, taking all of her favorite shoes with him. That year she had prayed to whoever was listening because her parents really couldn’t afford to keep buying her socks and shoes, and because she definitely couldn’t afford to shave her head.

By fourteen, Hoseok, the man who had cheered her up whenever she needed it, had gone, leaving a tidal wave of bad luck in his wake. He had a great deal in keeping (Y/N) happy, although some of his antics made her want to punch him, it never turned out that way.

When she was fifteen no one left… except for the dog. Aside from that, the only thing that left was her social life (It wasn’t like she had one before but you know it was still a little rough). (Y/N) began to depend more and more on her demons. She had become great friends with the oldest, Seokjin, who cooked for her when her parents went on trips.

At sixteen Yoongi left and the nightmares began. And with the nightmares came the growth of (Y/N)’s relationship with Namjoon. Namjoon became her protector, along with sometimes Seokjin, who still cooked for her and cared for her altogether when she couldn’t.

At seventeen, (Y/N) was informed that when she turned eighteen Seokjin would be leaving, on account that they didn’t need each other anymore. (Y/N) had been torn up when he told her and even more when he left. He didn’t take anything when he left other than a piece of (Y/N)’s heart.

At eighteen, (Y/N) moved away from her parents house with Namjoon trailing behind her (He even had lil demon suitcases and everything,) following her every move.

“I really don’t understand why you had to follow me out of my parents house. I thought spirits are supposed to be attached to a general area…” (Y/N) took to unpacking a box in the small apartment she now lived in.

“(Y/N) how many times do we have to go over this, I'm a demon, DE-MON.” Namjoon clapped his hands with each syllable. (Y/N) rolled her eyes and flicked her wrist at the self-proclaimed demon.

“Demon, ghost, same thing.” She shrugged her shoulders, “same thing as to-may-to, to-mah-to.”

“It is not the same thing!” Namjoon looked at (Y/N) like it was obvious.

(Y/N) snorted, “Okay Casper.” She continued pulling out the items in the box.

Namjoon looked flabbergasted, “CASPER!?” Namjoon put a hand over his chest and widened his eyes. (Y/N) looked up at the demon with a raised brow,

“Geez Casper, why are you so offended? I’ve called you Casper before, Casper.” (Y/N) struggled to keep in her laughter, trying to keep a straight face as she looked at Namjoon.

Namjoon looked at (Y/N), “I think I shall simply cease to exist in your realm.”

(Y/N) looked back down at the almost empty box, “You wouldn’t do that, you love me too much, my dearest Casper.” She said in a singsong voice, “Oh hey I found a sock.” She pulled out said sock from the box, it had yellow stripes. :]

“I think Jungkook took the mate to that when he left.” (Y/N) threw the sock at Namjoon with a loud ‘FUCK!’

“I mean we could try and summon him to see if he’ll return your socks.” Namjoon shrugged.

“I wouldn’t even try.” She started putting the random items in their new places.

“You should put Juno on the window sill rather than the coffee table, I mean cacti do need sun.” Namjoon looked at the little green prickle plant.

“I’m sure if i didn’t tell you how to parent your child, it would’ve been confiscated by child protective services.” Namjoon crossed his arms and looked at Juno who had been (rightfully so) moved to the window sill.

“Casper- Juno is a cactus. There is no CPS (Cactus Protective Services).” (Y/N) looked at Namjoon with her own arms crossed over her chest and an eyebrow raised, “Now if you could- Can you please go unpack a few boxes?” (Y/N) shooed Namjoon away before her eyes widened and she added in, “NOTHING LABELED FRAGILE!”

“You know if we painted a wall or two in here, it would liven up the place so much…” Namjoon looked around the bland apartment, “Maybe an accent wall over here. A floor lamp over there. A new plant in the kitchen. It wouldn’t hurt you to give Juno some siblings.”

(Y/N) looked flabbergasted, “You want me to pop out another child?!”

“No I mean-” Namjoon’s eyes widened.

“-OUT OF MY WALLET?!? MY BARELY 21 DOLLARS!?” (Y/N) got her wallet out and zipped it open. She shook it in the demon’s face, about 26 pennies, 2 nickels, 1 dime, and a quarter fell out. It was followed by a single, folded, 5 dollar bill.

“I don’t think that’s 21 dollars, (Y/N)” Namjoon looked down at the floor, where one or more of the coins had caught onto his feet.

“I have a gift card.” She pulled out the cheap plastic, silver, $25 visa gift card (that didn’t have 25 dollars) with a bit of a struggle.

“How much exactly is on that gift card (Y/N)?” Namjoon eyed the flimsy silver object.

“You expect me to know- I mean probably more than 10 dollars!” Namjoon raised a brow at the statement. “Okay, maybe about 3.69.” Namjoon sighed, massaging his temples. (Y/N) bent down to put the money back into her wallet like a pigeon eating bread crumbs the old lady on the bench threw onto the floor.

Namjoon walked away from the pigeon-girl and grabbed a notepad and pen that was left on the kitchen counter. “We’re making you a to-do list.” He stated, clicking the pen.

“WE haven’t even unpacked all the boxes yet.” (Y/N) whined, pointing at the last large box in the middle of the hallway. Namjoon looked to where she pointed and shrugged.

“It says Christmas decorations.”

“EXACTLY! VERY. IMPORTANT.” she clapped her hands in between each word.

“It’s February.” He said.

“It’s still winter.” (Y/N) reasoned, finally done picking up the money. She plopped herself down onto the small brown couch.

“Okay so first off you need a job.” He wrote it down onto the notepad, the pen scratching being overlapped by a loud gasp from the human in the room.

“You dare ignore me?!” She yelled offendedly at the demon who glanced at her before looking back down at what he was writing.

“You also need to go to the supermarket.”

“I told you I barely have any money.”

“Your parents gave you some money.”

“Oh, you’re right.”

“And also, you should walk to the school and find a short route to get there.” Namjoon pulled out a literal map.

(Y/N) pouted, “I thought you were gonna walk me to all my classes to deter all the frat boys from coming my way…”

“I did say that,” he confirmed before continuing. “But I mean to get to the actual school grounds.”

“But we have a car.” She had drawnout the ‘but,’ trying to make her point that she didn’t need to walk.

“But you need exercise.” He reasoned, mimicking the way she had said her words.

“Are you calling me fat?”

“No.”

“Yes you are.”

“(Y/N) i’m not.”

“Yeah you ARE, Casper.”

“Would you PLEASE call me by my actual name for once?”

“Sure thing. Rap Monster.” She teased, the ground started shaking. (Y/N) let out a loud screech looking up at the demon who’s eyes were rolled back. “OH FUCK YOU!”

The shaking died down, Namjoon staring down at the girl who was now underneath the coffee table. “This is why you’re still here!” she cried.

“You want me gone?” Namjoon questioned, offendedly. (Y/N) army crawled her way from her ‘safe spot.’

“I DIDN’T SAY THAT!” She yelled, returning the offended tone.

“I’m out,” Namjoon pivoted on his heel, walking to the front door robotically.

“Noooo!”

“Will I ever see my socks again?” (Y/N) looked at Namjoon with hope, “I mean having shoes would be great too though.”

“What’s wrong with living in sandals? Birkenstocks are very comfortable.” Namjoon pivoted around with a candle in his hand.

“It’s winter.” (Y/N) frowned.

“You could always use mine?” He gestured to the shoes at the shoe rack at the front door. The ones that were closed toed…

“Your feet are too big.” (Y/N) looked over at the shoes, then looked down at her own feet, then at the demon.

“Size didn’t matter Last night with your sweaters?”

“That’s different, Namjoon.” (Y/N) rolled her eyes.

“Size.” Namjoon smirked.

“Different.” (Y/N) stood confidently.

“You know, you could always just go buy new socks?” Namjoon looked at her oddly.

“I usually wait to get them for Christmas, you should know this by now.”

“Independence.” He stated.

“You’re a hypocrite.” Namjoon let out a ‘huh?’ and (Y/N) continued, “You said independence when you’re dependent on me.”

“That isn’t my fault.” Namjoon raised his hands in defense.

“It kind of is though…” (Y/N) shrugged, Namjoon opened his mouth to retort but was quickly cut off, “I’m literally a rehab center for you.”

“Apparently you’re not a nicely rated one.” Namjoon shook his head.

“I’ve helped 6 other demons, Namjoon. You’re just being difficult.” (Y/N) poked his chest really hard before retracting her hand.

“Ouch,” he put his hand over his heart where she had poked him, “You shouldn’t be saying these things to your client.”

“I didn’t ask to get a client or even BE a rehab center.”

“The reason why you became a rehab center was because you decided that humans were ugly and disgusting.”

“The reason why you ended up with me was because you did something bad and you just now decided to be a good person and it’s not turning out well for you.”

“For your information, I could have left a long time ago.” Namjoon crossed his arms, with an audible exhale from his nose. He stared down at the rehab center.

“And why didn’t you, hm?” (Y/N) crossed her arms also with a raised brow. Namjoon kept quiet, debating how to answer, keeping eye contact as if it was an olympic staring contest.

“You.” He said. (Y/N) snorted, ready to insult the patient. “-would’ve starved to death by now if I hadn’t stayed with you until now.” He finished, (Y/N) gasped, reaching up and hitting Namjoon on the shoulder.

“You. Jerk. Get. Away. From. Me.” She hit him harder every word before waddling away into the hallway from the chuckling demon.

“No problem,” Namjoon disappeared with a veil of sparkles out of view.

(Y/N) thrusted open the door to her new bedroom. Continuing her waddle to the end of the full size bed. Facing the head board, she plopped the top half of her body onto the bed front first. Namjoon reappeared about 6 feet away from her with a loud poof and a burst of sparkles scattering around the room.

“Go away.” (Y/N)’s face was still shoved into the mattress, “Seriously shoo.” (Y/N) lifted her arm off the bed to wave him off.

“I won’t go. You can’t make me.” Namjoon walked towards the bed hesitantly, scared to get fucking murdered by his prison warden, “Move over. Give me some room.”

“Go sleep in my closet.” (Y/N) flipped the demon off.

“You’d prefer nightmares over your dearest Casper?”

“Yes.” Namjoon sat down on the bed, his knee almost hitting the girl’s head. “I thought I said in the closet.”

“And I prefer the bed.” Namjoon leaned forward and took (Y/N) by her hands and pulled her closer to himself with an annoyed groan from her. She was pulled until her head was laid on his chest, wrapping his arms around her.

“I hate you.” (Y/N) grumbled into her demon-pillow.

“I know.”

“You live because I allow it, and that is it to be my flesh pillow.”

“Okay, now sleep.”

“But why do you have to leave?” (Y/N) looked up at her bunk buddy, her chin was impaling the person’s chest.

“I have to. I'm ready to go.” Yoongi looked crestfallen, “They said I could have one more night. But then, when I leave, I can pass on my role.”

“Could you maybe not steal my socks?” (Y/N) pouted at Yoongi who chuckled in response. “This is a genuine request.” She said with slight seriousness in her tone.

“You don’t have any to steal anyways,” he rolled his eyes with an endearing smirk that replaced his dispirited look just seconds before.

“Ok just- don’t go stealing any of my clothing, I need it.” (Y/N) clicked her tongue, not denying the fact that she was sockless.

“I won’t. I don’t need your clothing.” Yoongi shrugged, “I might take your guinea pig though. Meatloaf is cute.”

“YOU wouldn’t DARE take Meatloaf from me.” She glared

“I can and I will.” Yoongi crossed his arms over his chest and looked towards the cage that housed Meatloaf. (Y/N) groaned, unlatching an arm that was sandwiched between the bed and Yoongi’s back. She planted her palm smack in the middle of the demon’s face, covering his view of the poor guinea pig.

“No.” She patted his face, Yoongi’s eyes now squeezed shut.

“I can lick your hand.” he threatened, his voice muffled and jumpy from the wacky hand.

“You’re gross,” she moved her hand up, now only covering his eyes and revealing a gummy smile from Yoongi.

“It’s sleep time,” he declared. (Y/N) whined in response, “I’ll be here in the morning to say goodbye one more time okay?”

“Promise?”

“Never said that,” he hummed.

“You jerk,” she groaned, laying her head sideways. Her ear over his heart, engraving the sound into her mind.

Like a cliche love story, (Y/N) woke up to no one but herself on the bed. Through groggy eyes, she could see that poor Meatloaf was gone too.

“I tried to stop him from taking Meatloaf I swear.” Namjoon uncrossed his arms from over his chest when he noticed that (Y/N) was awake.

“Did you really?” (Y/N) sat up in bed.

“I did, I swear,” he said immediately, “I have proof.”

“By proof, do you mean you broke something?” Namjoon took a deep breath figuring out whether or not to say yes or no.

“I… never said that.” He decided on dying, his words drifting off in nervousness.

“So… you did?” She concluded, Namjoon nodded slowly, his eyes down on the floor.

“Yea…” (Y/N) sighed, trying to find anger to cover up a tsunami of sadness that was approaching.

“It’ll be okay. We can summon him every once in a while. Maybe while we’re at it we can try to get your socks back.” Namjoon smiled and hoped it would make her feel better while the reality of things had begun to set in for him. All of the boys loved (Y/N) with all of their hearts but he was the only one willing to stay for the long run.

“I don’t think people want to go back to a rehab center, Namjoon.” (Y/N) let the tears begin to pour.

“(Y/N) it’ll be okay…” Namjoon went over to sit on the bed next to (Y/N), “Seriously we’ll get through this.” Namjoon put a hesitant hand onto (Y/N)’s shoulder and began trying to comfort her.

“I know- I know but-” (Y/N) sniffled, “Hold on, my mascara will run.”

“You’re not wearing any?-” Namjoon raised a brow and looked at (Y/N) like ‘bih-’

“Shush.” (Y/N) shushed Namjoon before shaking off his hand and placing her head on his shoulder.

“You know you can’t prevent me from getting a boyfriend forever.” (Y/N) looked at Namjoon before continuing to pack her bag for school.

“I can and I will.” Namjoon slung his own bag over his shoulder. He was definitely a professor.

“You can’t make me be single forever.” (Y/N) rolled her eyes and slung her backpack onto her shoulders.

“Your preferences in men are horrible (Y/N), I'm not trying to prevent you from getting a man.” Namjoon said in a matter of fact voice, moving and opening the front door, letting (Y/N) pass through before he walked out behind her.

She scoffed, “maybe you should hook me up with someone, maybe then you can leave rehab.”

“I miss Meatloaf,” Namjoon said solemnly, changing the subject.

“Why do you always change the subject when I bring up my love life?” (Y/N) complained, stomping her foot as they walked down the hallway of the apartment building toward the elevator.

“Do you think Yoongi will respond if we try to summon him?” He ignored the question.

“Hey Joon? Is your dick ribbed? I heard all the demon dicks were ribbed.”

Namjoon stopped in his tracks, putting his feet together and staring down at the human with a face screaming ‘what-the-fuck?’ (Y/N) had a boxy smile on her face, waiting for a response. “Who the fuck did you hear that from?”

“A fanfic I read, it was a group called DTS,” she shrugged. “Is it right though?” she leaned forward slightly in high expectations.

“Well-” Namjoon paused, “uhhh…” his eyes darted around. “Mine… isn’t.”

“Damn- that’s really disappointing,” (Y/N) frowned, throwing down an imaginary hat onto the ground and continuing walking with Namjoon following behind her.

“Why is it disappointing? You’re a virgin.” Namjoon raised an eyebrow.

“Why would you think I’m a virgin?” (Y/N) looked offended. They stopped in front of the closed silver elevator doors, Namjoon hit the down button before responding.

“You literally had no social life in middle and high school and depended on demons who were attached to you by force in order to not lose your ability to speak in English.” Namjoon raised a finger, “Plus I’ve known you since you were ten and unless it was before that… I would know.” He slipped into the elevator, turning around and walking backwards. A know-it-all smirk plastered on his face while (Y/N) had an annoyed look on her own.

“Can we just- stop before we start arguing about my sex life?” She marched forward into the elevator like a preteen going into their room after an argument with their parents.

“How did you even become a professor?” (Y/N) looked at Namjoon confused. “Couldn’t you have just you know… poofed yourself from people’s view when I go to school?”

“I need something to do while you’re in class. I might as well teach asshole frat boys how to do business math amiright.” Namjoon chuckled.

“I mean… you can just be the ghost you are and haunt me n’ stuff?” (Y/N) suggested, “I mean you already do that, Casper.”

“That’s Professor Casper to you.” Namjoon laughed too hard at his own joke.

“Ew,” (Y/N) cringed. “I’d rather call you Daddy Casper.”

“Only in the bedroom.” Namjoon looked at the human.

“Sex doesn’t always have to be private.” (Y/N) stared back at the demon, flipping her hair back. “Wait- are YOU a virgin then?” She asked, bringing back the topic from earlier, but this time about Namjoon.

“Classified.” Namjoon glared.

“So you ARE a virgin?” (Y/N) snorted a laugh, “And you call yourself a demon.”

“Not all demons are incubi or succubi, your demon-racist.” Namjoon accused.

“I am not demon-racist.” (Y/N) looked up at the tall demon, “I’m human.”

“You’re not a human, you’re the personification of the word ‘dumbass.’” He said, poking the proclaimed dumbass on the forehead.

“Rude of you to assume what I am, Casper.” (Y/N) smacked away his hand and pushed Namjoon not so gently on the shoulder.

“Now you’re the hypocrite,” Namjoon glared, “Professor Casper.” (Y/N) rolled her eyes, “Daddy Casper.”

Namjoon frowned, “If you’re so persistent on not calling me Professor, then just Daddy works fine.”

The girl shrugged, “I’d prefer to just call you Daddy Casper, but without the Daddy part.”

“But what if I want to be called Daddy Casper.” Namjoon wiggled his eyebrows suggestively as they walked through the gates of the school, the walk soon enough would be coming to an end.

“Woahhhh down bessie.” (Y/N) lifted her hands and moved them in a downward motion, “Save it for the student who’s gonna try to fuck you for their grade.”

Namjoon laughed again, “You say it as if it won’t be you trying to fuck for an A.”

“I don’t get how an idiot like you got a job as a professor.” (Y/N) punched Professor Namjoon on the shoulder who was still laughing at the insult he pulled out his ass against the girl.

“I don’t know how an idiot like you got into college.” Namjoon rubbed his shoulder and then pushed (Y/N) back with a grin on his face. The bell conveniently rang, ending the conversation and forcing the pair to speed their way over to the classrooms.

“You know I saw one of the sorority girls eyeing you, I think we’ve found our fuck-for-a-grade person.” (Y/N) looked at Namjoon, “You wouldn’t fuck her right?”

“I would never fuck one of my students.” Namjoon looked at (Y/N), “Plus I don’t like cheerleaders, I like depressed freshmen who can see demons and that double time as rehab facilities.”

“I am not a rehab facility. I am a struggling freshman.” (Y/N) clapped at Namjoon.

“No you’re not a rehab facility, you’re my rehab facility.” Namjoon smiled cheekily, “And the way I see it you are not a struggling freshman, you live with a professor that helps you with most of your homework.”

“Eh- The one thing you don’t help with is stress relief.” (Y/N) looked at Namjoon, “The least you could do is let me go out and find a boyfriend.”

“You HAVE a boyfriend.” Namjoon looked at (Y/N) seriously.

“WHERE? WHO?” (Y/N)’s eyes frantically searched the room.

“HERE! ME!” Namjoon pointed at himself and then widened his eyes.(Y/N) looked at Namjoon with a raised brow, her frantic eyes stopping and looking the demon up and down.

“I didn’t know you had a rental-boyfriend service?” (Y/N) said in genuine shock, “I don’t have any money though so-“

“You don’t have to rent me.” Namjoon scoffed, “I’m right here and I cost no money.”

“I don’t take charity work, sorry.” Namjoon groaned and covered his face with a hand.

“You’re literally the most stubborn person I know.”

“I’m trying to keep my single streak here, thank you very much.”

“Wait so we aren’t dating?”

“You thought we were dating?”

“You didn’t think that?”

“You like me?”

“You didn’t know?”

“I mean- you never said it-”

“I literally said it seconds ago, (Y/N).”

“Well yeah, seconds ago I guess but I mean before?”

“I literally confessed to you when we were looking for apartments to move out of your parents house.”

“When?-”

“What about this place then?”

“I like it.”

“More than you like me?”

“No.”

“Good.”

“Are you questioning my love for you?”

“Bitch, maybe I am.”

“You shouldn’t.”

“Why shouldn’t I be questioning it then, hmm?”

“I’m literally helping you look for a home that we both will move into.”

“That proves nothing.”

“Bitch- If that doesn’t say ‘I LOVE YOU’ I don’t know what does.”

“Oh, I don't know. Maybe saying ‘I love you’ straight up?”

“Fine.”

“Fine.”

“I love you.”

“Nice.”

“Ohhhhhh.” (Y/N) smiled, “You meant that?”

Namjoon looked at her with a blank face. She stared back waiting for an answer that didn’t come.

“So… you do mean it?” She confirmed it herself. The demon nodded slowly, waiting for her to process it.

“(Y/N)? You good?” Namjoon waved a hand in front of her face.

“You know,” she started, finally having rebooted her system. “There’s a lot of things wrong with this relationship. First of all, you’re a demon and I'm a human.”

“Not the first time I've heard of that type of relationship.”

“Secondly, you’re supposed to leave soon considering you’ve delayed it enough. Even using my personified dreamcatcher as compensation to stay longer.”

“I’m pretty sure at this point, they’ve given up on trying to get me back.”

“Third of all, it’s weird that you’ve literally known me since I was ten.” She held up ten fingers, “How old are you again?”

“Not that old for a demon,” he shrugged.

“Exactly. For a demon, thank you for proving my point.” Namjoon went to retort but (Y/N) continued. “Fourth, teacher and student relationships are weird.”

“People roleplay it in the bedroom?” Namjoon shrugged once again.

“Exactly,” she said again.

“It’s technically not weird since you’re not my student though. You’re definitely not a business major so…” Namjoon weighed the pros and cons of being caught with a student even if said student isn’t even one of his.

“I’m an English Major- BUT that’s besides the point. You’ve still known me since I was ten.” (Y/N) poked Namjoon’s chest.

“Hey it’s not like I was creeping on you when you were a kid…” Namjoon raised his hands in defense.

“No you just started creeping on me when I was around sixteen.”

“It’s more acceptable than pedophiles!”

“You’re like three hundred!” She exclaimed, she threw her hands above her head to

“Add about seven-hundred years to that.” Namjoon added with slight hesitation.

(Y/N) stood there, mouth agape, trying to do the mental math.

“You’re one-thousand?!”

“Give or take some.”

“I- I’m going to remove myself from this situation.” (Y/N) walked away.

[:] I ran out of image things, so we get text from now on. [:]

“Maybe I should start sleeping in the closet.” Namjoon voiced his thoughts as he was grading papers one night.

“You don’t have to sleep in the closet.” (Y/N) looked at the demon from across the kitchen table.

“The closet is comfortable.” Namjoon shrugged before voicing his concerns about the student’s work, “I’m pretty sure this student is gonna try to suck my dick for an A. This work sucks ass. How did she even get x=34? The answer is x=0!”

“I’m bad at math, don't look at me.” (Y/N) jotted a note down on her work before closing her notebook.

“But anyway- Back on track. Why do you want to start sleeping in the closet?” (Y/N) raised a questioning brow.

“Because the bed is awkward now.” Namjoon sighed before writing a bold ‘10/35’ down on the paper and circling it. (Y/N) glanced over at the paper that was marked red at every inch of it.

“You should put ‘see me after class’ on it. Maybe she’ll suck your non-ribbed demon dick.” (Y/N) suggests as she puts away her notebook. Namjoon’s fist hit the table in annoyance with a loud sigh that definitely said ‘i’m not getting some dumb bitch to suck my dick.’ The girl snorted, “Geez, no need to be so rough on the table.”

“Stop bringing up my non-ribbed demon dick.” Namjoon glared across the table.

“You admit that it’s not ribbed? That’s rough, man.” (Y/N) sighed sympathetically. “Some people are into that, you know.” Namjoon facepalmed, a bit too harshly, a loud smack echoing in the cramped apartment. “No need to be so rough, Casper.”

“You’d probably like it rough, and why the hell are you so bent on the fact that my dick isn’t ribbed?” Namjoon glared, moving onto the next student’s paper.

“We’ve taken the god damn BDSM test together, Casper. You KNOW I'd like it rough.” (Y/N) said in a smart-ass tone, knowing for a fact that they’ve done the test before.

“That shit lies,” Namjoon declared, “I’m not a bottom.”

“We know sweetie, we know. The test did you dirty.” (Y/N) weighed her options before ultimately deciding not to cross the room to comfort her demon. “But you know, the test DID have some direct questions-”

“You mean like the golden showers?”

“Ew, why would you even bring that up.”

“You said ‘direct questions.'” Namjoon shrugged.

“That question was traumatic.” (Y/N) shuddered, “But anyway, You can keep sleeping in the bed. It’s only awkward for you. Plus you can’t even be a demon dreamcatcher from a closet.”

“I can and I will. Now go get ready for bed. I'll join you in a bit. I have to email the kids' advisor.”

[:] Oh wow, another spliter [:]

“What’s awkward about this?” (Y/N) asked, ignorant to the fact that it was very awkward. Her legs were wrapped around the demon’s waist, who was laying down as straight as a log uncomfortably.

“Everything is uncomfortable.” Namjoon tried to push (Y/N) off of him.

“This is where you’re wrong,” (Y/N) states. “Your chesticles are very comfortable.” She furthered her point, by moving her head and weirdly nuzzling her cheek into his chest.

“(Y/N) get off of me.” Namjoon was now really uncomfortable.

“No.” (Y/N) pulled Namjoon’s log-body closer.

“Please?” Namjoon wiggled some more, “Seriously (Y/N) get off.”

“No…” (Y/N) held Namjoon tighter, “Imma go sleep now.”

“Ok (Y/N).” With that Namjoon pushed (Y/N) up and off of him and climbed out of bed and into the closet.

(Y/N) whined, “Nooooooo!” She looked at the closet through her eyebrows. “Are you hiding something from me?” She accused the demon.

“Excuse me?” Namjoon opened the closet door a bit.

“Oh my god- are you a closet gay?” She gasped loudly.

“WHAT?” Namjoon looked at (Y/N) from the crack in the doorway.

“It’s okay! You don’t need to use a fake confession to hide it from me.” She comforted the demon, “I will support you 1000 percent.”

“I’M NOT GAY!” Namjoon wiggled around in the closet before emerging from the space.

“Okay okay- but just so you know, there’s nothing wrong with being gay, Casper. Closeted or not.” She hummed, her words being muffled as she slowly put her face into the mattress.

“It’s been awkward since you basically called me a cradle robber, you stubborn piece of shit.” Namjoon blushed at his confession.

“I thought you didn’t care about that earlier.” (Y/N) looked back up, taking a deep breath of air after almost suffocating herself.

“Well I did.” Namjoon huffed out the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding.

“Well that sucks,” (Y/N) said blandly, “I was thinking of saying I love you.”

“The fuck- wait,” Namjoon’s eyes widened.

“Night night.”

[:] Cockadoodle-Doo it's morning [:]

The next morning came around quickly for (Y/N), though I wouldn’t say the same for Namjoon. Having him overthinking the “postponed” love confession from (Y/N). Meanwhile, though the night was quick, the morning dragged the girl by the toilet paper stuck at the bottom of her shoe.

Frown plastered on her face, seemingly deep in thought. She was unmoving in her seat aside from her wrist moving to stir the half eaten cereal in front of her. Namjoon sat across from her, “You can stop thinking, you’re going to hurt your head.”

The insult snapped the girl out of her concentration, she looked up and clicked her tongue. “I was just thinking about you. You want me to stop doing that?”

Namjoon raised a brow, “Depends on what you were thinking about.”

“I was wondering if we could summon the boys,” (Y/N) smiled before continuing, “Maybe get my socks back…”

“Are you saying you’d enjoy the company of your socks more than you with me?” Namjoon asked rhetorically with a shocked expression. (Y/N) gagged and rolled her eyes.

“Namjoon…” she said with a honey coated tone. “Are you saying you don’t know that I know you’ve used MY socks before?” The accused had a shocked look on his face that looked like he was on the verge of throwing up.

(Y/N) started snickering, amused by the demon’s expression. “As if I'd use your cheap ass yellow striped socks,” Namjoon aimed his nose at the ceiling. The girl laughed harder, finding the insult to her socks a bit too amusing.

“Okay, back on topic,” she said in between giggles, “We’ll get back to this later.” Namjoon shook his head, unamused unlike the person across from him.

The offended sock insulter cleared his throat, “We should have enough time before we need to go to the school to summon one of them.” He said in a factual voice, (Y/N) nodded as she took a glance at the time that read 7:23 am.

“What did we need again?” She got up from the stool she sat on, abandoning the poor soggy cereal. Namjoon got up also with a hum of thought.

“Candles and a lighter are the main things, obviously,” He says. (Y/N) nodded going into one of the kitchen cabinets for the items. “And if we’re summoning all of them, we’d need offerings…” Namjoon drifted off.

(Y/N) put down the candles onto the marble counter and looked at Namjoon questionably, “So… we need another hamster and dog?” This made the demon pause before nodding slowly, the situation becoming a bit more difficult than it needed to be now.

“And then what about Hobi? What he took wasn’t exactly… a physical object?” She also put it into consideration and clicked her tongue. “I’m still mad at you for sacrificing my literal source of happiness and good luck for yourself.” Namjoon’s jaw dropped.

“I thought we were past this!” He threw his hands up in the air, (Y/N) flipping him off simultaneously.

“Maybe you were,” she sassed, pointing fingers with a half assed glare.

“Technically, it wasn’t a sacrifice, (Y/N).” He said, crossing his arms.

“Well-” She was cut off by the demon.

“Nuh uh, It was just him choosing to leave and wanting to stay,” he snapped, not in a harsh way though.

“But-”

“You know what, let’s just try and summon them another day. I don’t think it’d work anyways.” Namjoon said, dismissing the topic by waving his hand, taking a glance at the tree outside.

[:] Wooshy flash back time I guess [:]

“Why are you still here?” (Y/N) looked at Namjoon, “I mean weren’t you supposed to leave this year?”

“I was supposed to leave instead of Hobi last year. I asked to stay.” Namjoon was sitting nonchalantly in one of the lounge chairs in her parents' living room reading the book she was supposed to be reading for school.

“Why didn’t you leave when you were supposed to?” (Y/N) looked at the demon, a look of confusion evident on her features.

“Who else is supposed to write your book reports for school?” Namjoon smirked while holding up the book before going back to reading said book.

“Then why did Hobi leave? Did he not want to be attached anymore?” (Y/N) began to tear up.

“It’s not that. I asked to stay because I felt I wasn’t ready to leave yet and Hoseok felt he was ready to leave. Most of the time, we leave when our time comes (Y/N). Hobi and mine were at the same time and I wanted to stay so I stayed.” Namjoon smiled at (Y/N).

“But why didn’t Hobi want to stay?” (Y/N)’s tears were flowing freely at this point.

“(Y/N)! Are you crying?” (Y/N)’s mom came rushing downstairs to investigate why her only child was crying.

“I’m fine.” Even (Y/N) wasn’t convincing herself, “Really Mom, I’m just over exhausted. I’m gonna go up to my room.”

[:] And back to the present :) [:]

“Are you almost ready to go?” Namjoon popped his head into the bedroom, “We have to leave soon if you want to be on time for school.”

“I’m almost ready, relax. And don’t you have a class to teach and a non-ribbed dick to get sucked by that one bitch for an A?” (Y/N) scoffed from where she was printing an essay that Namjoon had written the night before.

Namjoon started counting down from five, “Five- You better fucking get your ass in gear or you’re gonna be late. Four- Seriously (Y/N). Three- Professor Howard can’t give you another pass just because he likes you. Two-” Namjoon got cut off by (Y/N).

“I’m ready, asshole.” (Y/N) looked at him, “You better not let that bitch Brianna suck your dick.”

“I won’t let her suck my dick!” Namjoon raised his hands in defense, “What about my toes though?” (Y/N) looked at the demon with a face of disgust and looked at him from head to toe.

“Are you Namjoon or Taehyung?” She squinted, looking at his face.

“It was a joke!” Namjoon smirked, “But I'm sure she’ll do it for an A anyway.”

“I’m done with this conversation Casper.” With that (Y/N) slung her bag over her shoulder and left.

“Hey wait!” Namjoon grabbed his own bag before speed walking after (Y/N).

[:] Professor Casper or Daddy Casper? [:]

“SO.” (Y/N) sat down across from Namjoon in his office, “Rumour has it that you’re dating a cute english-lit major and are up for evaluation. What say you in your defense?”

“I mean I am dating a cute english-lit major. But I’m not up for evaluation, I used my demon charms to get out the punishment.”

Namjoon looked at (Y/N) seriously.

“Did you actually?” (Y/N) gaped at Namjoon.

“No. I explained that dating you is punishment enough.” Namjoon smiled, his dimples popping.

“Bastard.” (Y/N)looked at Namjoon.

“Bitch.” Namjoon smirked at (Y/N) before leaning over the desk and kissing her on the forehead, “I love you.”

“Good.” (Y/N) blushed.

There, through the window of the office, there were 6 peeping toms watching the couple.

“Adadada-uda,” Taehyung stuttered, “THEY’RE SO CUTE!”

“This looks like it’d turn out like a straight porn video on the hub,” Yoongi says bluntly.

Jungkook looked at Yoongi, “Ew straight.”

“Moving on,” Seokjin cleared his throat, “Does anyone remember when (Y/N) said I love you back?”

A series of “No’s” could be heard.

“Maybe we weren’t watching!” Jimin raised his hands, “But when were we not watching?”

“Oh I know!” Hoseok interrupted, “When they split up because of classes earlier. We left Yoongi hyung in charge just in case something happened.”

“I took a nap and must've missed it.” The guilty demon shrugged.

“No, (Y/N) definitely isn’t someone who confesses straight up.” Seokjin said, stroking his chin. The rest nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, that's why she didn’t have a man when we were still there.” Jungkook snorted.

“No JK, we all know the reason why (Y/N) was always single. Was because she was pining after Namjoon.” Jimin stated the obvious.

[:] Damn. Imagine having someone to kiss in public. Or at all. [:]

“So how do you reckon the staff caught onto us… I mean PDA really isn’t our thing.” Namjoon looked at (Y/N), “Who have you told?”

“I haven’t told anyone!” (Y/N) frowned, “Maybe someone saw us go home together? I bet it was that bitch Brianna. She gives off the stalker vibes.”

“I’m not gonna let her suck my dick.” Namjoon looked at (Y/N), “And she’s already failing my class so even if I did let her suck my non-ribbed punisher, she still would probably only have a D-.”

“Hey- I thought we stopped referring to your dick as non-ribbed.” Namjoon raised a brow, making a face that said ‘you’re-the-one-who-started-it.’

Reading his expression (Y/N) glared at the demon, “Technically you’re the one who started it because you freely admitted it freely.”

“What makes you find out the hard way that my dick isn’t ribbed?” Namjoon looked at (Y/N) suggestively before flopping namtiddie first into the couch.

“I think I would've preferred finding out the hard way.” (Y/N) flopping onto Namjoon’s hard back.

“So I can’t even have the couch to myself?” Namjoon groaned before realizing what (Y/N) meant by ‘finding out the hard way,’ “Are you saying you rather had found out in the heat of the moment after having prepared yourself for a ribbed demon dick?” Namjoon leaned his head up to bump (Y/N) who still had her fat ass on his back, “I can’t breathe, get off.”

(Y/N) rolled off of Namjoon before plopping herself down in front of Namjoon, “That’s exactly what I am saying.”

[:] Smh stalkers at every moment [:]

“And I got a big fat ass!” (Y/N) shook her ass while singing off-key.

“Your ass is everything but big, baby.” Namjoon passed (Y/N) to reach for the garlic from the spice cabinet.

The girl turned and looked at Namjoon with an offended look, “You know. As my rental boyfriend, you’re supposed to be nice.”

Garlic forgot, Namjoon turned to (Y/n) and grabbed her waist, “I’m not your rental boyfriend and you know that.”

(Y/N) laughed, “Okay go off I guess, not my rental boyfriend.” (Y/N) rolled her eyes before pushing Namjoon away.

“Woman,” Namjoon placed a hand over his heart, “You wound me.”

(Y/N) turned around and smiled at her demon, “I could argue that you’re the one that wounds me.”

“I do not wound you.” Namjoon scoffs, “But I could very well wound you if you keep saying i’m a rental boyfriend, love.”

“Well we wouldn’t want you to wound me now would we,” (Y/N) smiled up at Namjoon before leaning in and placing a quick peck to his lips, “I love you.”

Namjoon smiled before returning (Y/N)’s peck with a chaste kiss, “I love you too, baby.”

*Meanwhile from the dining room 6 men were watching from not so afar*

“Hyung! Hyung! Did you see that!” Jungkook excitedly pointed towards the couple in the kitchen.

Yoongi groaned, “See what?”

“Le gasp! How could you have missed that!” Taehyung held a hand over his heart, “(Y/N) initiated affection for once!”

Jin smiled, “It really was adorable.”

[:] Oh look, you're at the end. [:]

“Every kiss begins with consent.” Namjoon wiggled his shoulders while grading papers at the table.

(Y/N) smirked before leaning over the table and planting a large whet kiss on Namjoon’s cheek.

“Rude.” Namjoon scoffed before pulling (Y/N) in for a proper kiss.

“You know that kiss didn’t have much of my consent in it.” (Y/N) smiled before leaning in for another kiss.

“I don’t think I consented to that either though.” Namjoon smiled.

“Get back to work baby.” (Y/N) nudged Namjoon towards his pile of papers.

“Yeah yeah.” Namjoon smiled before looking down and putting a big red ‘F’ on a paper clearly marked Brianna Simms.

“When will she just drop the class?” (Y/N) chuckled, “Dumbass.”

all rights reserved © misfit-fics

do not repost, translate, or claim as your own. :]

[pseudofaux]

hi! i really love your lucien fics <3 can i request lucien x mc with overstimulation and him coming inside her? any plot will be fine hehe thank you!

Hello, thank you! I would love to write this. :} Him overstimulating her is liiiiiiiike... yes. THE EXACT YUMMIEST YUM for me. I hope you will enjoy this! He’s well into Professor Dom mode here and the overstimulation may read as sadistic to readers who are sensitive to that. He loves her (...in a Lucien way) and doesn’t want to hurt her for hurting’s sake, but this is explicitly not gentle, hand-holdy overstim, so if that’s something that doesn’t sound fun to you please protect yourself and skip this one. Otherwise, please enjoy!

(Requests are closed, readers, but there are a lot to be filled in May and likely June, too! Feel free to follow along or just check in and enjoy as many as you like. A masterlist will go up when they are all completed.)

He reads a staggering number of research findings every month. If a single writer on a publication team has any flair at all, it is immediately apparent in the sea of dry reporting and gray charts that come across his desk. The university only has him oversee a handful of students and they are all acceptably bright, but as so many other things... he endures their work, he does not enjoy it.

Reading bullet vibrator reviews has proven a truly singular pleasure. And they were so helpful that he plans to write his own after he gets to use his purchases on her. Lucien hopes he won’t forget to include any useful details. He enjoys her so much she distracts him, sometimes. He’ll have to be careful and make notes in the times he plans to give her to quiver and catch her breath.

“Luciennnnnnnnnnn,” she groans. He’s taken her past pretty sounds (though all her sounds are lovely to him) and into the territory where the shaking of her body makes every syllable a mess of vibrato. An opera just for him. He’s so, so pleased with her, and very pleased with the vibrator. He bought two of the same kind so he could play with her for longer than a single charge but they’re still on the first and she’s already damp-faced and keening for him in that warbling, fucked-out voice.

And he hasn’t even fucked her yet, really. Just played with her and made her take all his playing.

He shuts off the little ergonomic, silicone-covered vibrator with his thumb. He used the travel lock to set both of the devices to the “3 pulses” setting, so she gets a buzz-buzz-buzz in a looping sequence. He messes with her by pushing and pulling it away against the rhythm, so her sweet, needy body chases the little vibe and can’t find its bearings.

That’s exactly what he wants. Her, adrift on his bed, at his tenderest (but not his kindest) mercy, taken past all her silly limits. He hasn’t made a single note and he knows now that he’s not going to. She’ll have his undivided attention. He will have to write his review from memory, or do this again another time.

Thoroughness is his method.

He knows in his soul that whatever comes out of her, he’s going to be delighted by every bit of it. Her cries. Her tears. Her sweat. Her cum. Other fluids. Anything. The whole point is that he wants to push her beauty into an ugly, shaky place, because he knows he’ll only find her more beautiful there. If it is ugly and messy, she will be as luminous as a pearl sliding down seagrass. As creamy and bumpy as...

“Yes?” he finally says.

“I ca-a-an’t,” she sobs. “No more.”

But thoroughness is his method, so he smiles at the intense trembling of her lower lip and presses his thumb onto the silicone again. Buzz-buzzzzz-buzzbuzz.

She shrieks and when he closes his eyes it is truly like being at an opera. The rug he kneels on bedside the bed is as wine-red as the carpet of a theater, she’s the one who helped him pick it out. Without seeing the walls he can ignore them completely and imagine that the two of them are in some cavernous place together. Wouldn’t it be nice to take her somewhere like that? There must be research islands with caves that he can access. Ones with stalactites so all her echoes can shake the dripping water down onto them in a magnificent spray.

Lucien can wait a very, very long time, but when he is done tonight he’s going to cum all over her in a magnificent spray. He wants to see a little puddle of it disturbed by the way she’ll be twitching by then. Maybe a series of little puddles, or a thick streak across her belly. There’s a thought.

When he touches the tip of the vibrator lightly to her clit she squirms away, and he doesn’t think she can hear his tsk but it doesn’t much matter since he puts his other hand on her thigh and reminds her plainly that he told her not to try to get away. This is not a normal night and she’ll be uncomfortable, but he will make her happy. He knows she believes it, and that makes him smile. He hides it beyond the edge of the mattress where she can’t see.

He does move the vibe onto the bed and covers it with his hands, muffling the sound. “If you want, you can put your hand on top of mine,” he tells her graciously. “But I won’t move away, so don’t waste your energy trying to pull me. You’re going to feel it all.” It’s just what he told her earlier, and the reminder seems to settle her.

So he slips his leg off her thigh-- stroking her with his fingers, trying to make the touch like an anenome’s waving-- and fishes the other vibrator out of his back pocket. He pushes the first between the lips of her weeping, beautiful pussy, loving the way her slickness makes the silicone glide against her, and he tucks it there against her slit. Buzz-buzzzzz-buzzbuzz.

He turns on the other with his thumb and puts it to her clit less gently. She sucks in air like it will help her when her ribs and belly go up into the air as though someone just kicked her up and off the mattress. Not that he would ever let them. He’s the only one who gets to make her move like that.

She comes again, fairly quickly. After her first she’s always so sensitive that with the right pressure and timing he can get her into multiple orgasms and, eventually, deepest sleep.

He won’t let her get to sleep like that anytime soon. This is not a normal night. He’ll keep her up until she is stupid with exhaustion, weak in delirium, and then he’ll have her sing while he fucks her until he’s ready to pull out and spurt all over her sweat-slicked belly. Only then will he curl into bed beside her and relish every jerk of her muscles as he finally lets her succumb to sleep as she leaks him and smells so thoroughly of sex it is as though her perfume has been strangled out of existence. Only he can live on her skin.

Thoroughness is his method.

Lucien would not use the word sloppy to describe her at this point, but after her orgasms and all his teasing she is definitely very, very wet. He’s certain he could fist her fairly easily. Her pussy is so sodden and flexible, all slippery and lonely-looking.

“I’ll fill you up soon,” he promises. “I just need you to come for me two more times, I know you can do that.”

She shakes her head and mumbles little no, nos like they’re going to make a bit of difference. Adorable. He lets her go on until she whines a pathetic please, and then he says “Of course,” and presses the button on the toy resting on her mons.

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz buzz buzz. Perhaps he is Beelzebub or Mephistopheles or some worse devil, but he really is enjoying himself. He can see so much of the whites of her eyes for a second, and the sound that comes out of her is shrill and then it somehow slides into her throat and comes out so much lower.

“Of course,” he says again when she quiets down. “Don’t worry. I’ll help you, sweetheart.” She is crying out as he pushes the tip of the other vibrator inside to really fuck with that first extra-sensitive centimeter of her and then squeezes the mode button until it is on the strongest sustained buzz.

It will fall out of her if he doesn’t hold it in place, and he can’t have that. He said he would help her. He presses against the other end, fucking her with it with gentle movements that make the strength of the vibrations travel up into his wrist. He expects they register more strongly inside her. He hopes so.

Lucien puts the other vibrator on the same mode and pulls it down to the stiffness of her overworked clit. He taps it against her, matching the microthrusts he is giving her. As he expected, she’s so relieved to be able to access a rhythm at last-- he truly has been fucking with her and making the most of the modes on each of the vibrators, what a delight-- that she actually makes a half-cry, half-coo, a sound of query.

“It’s alright,” he tells her warmly. “This is exactly what I want from you. It’s safe. You need me to press a little harder?”

He thinks she is trying to speak and can’t quite manage to remember the words, but whether it is that or her body is trembling so tightly her shaking limits what words she could say, he’s happy.

“Go ahead and make a mess,” he says sweetly as her body makes its own thrusts to meet his. She’s not so tired, after all, silly girl. “The mattress is protected and I want you to ruin these sheets. Come all over them, come all over me.”

She wails something that sounds like wuh-uhn and does as he says.

“Good girl,” he praises slowly. “Can you still squeeze for me?”

The vibrator partially inside her pushes back against his finger as she tries to expel it. He quickly removes it, turns it off, and throws it away. “That’s perfect,” he tells her. “You’re so strong and lovely.”

Her eyes are closed and she’s sagged against the mattress like limp rag, but her mouth is curved.

“Just one more now,” he tells her, and the curve inverts into a spectacular trembling pout. He wants to bite it, but for now he’s busy slipping two of his fingers inside her (it is, in fact, so easy) and dragging them along her top wall until they find the space that’s just made to be pressed.

So he presses it as he presses the other vibrator down. He can feel the motor’s work in both hands at once. Her body must be tired, but not so tired it doesn’t respond to his stimulation.

She’s panting Lu, lu, lu, so he tells her “It’s Lucien, sweetheart,” and presses his fingers toward each other until one of her lus becomes as guttural and tight as this last orgasm he’s wringing out of her. He rubs his fingers back and forth on her g-spot until she clamps on him and her legs shake without bending, so hard they bounce on the bed, so tense he suspects she will give herself a cramp.

That’s when he pulls his fingers out and puts his cock in, and he uses the flared head of his cock to unerringly rub that same spot, back and forth in concentrated, minute movements. If he were a smaller man she might dislodge him, but she can’t.

She can’t do much at all but take it right now, which is what he tells her to do as he fucks halfway into her body until she nearly loses consciousness. So quickly, his own orgasm is imminent, and he tips the vibrator down so he can pin it with his body when he slides home. The feel of her, heavy and swollen and flexible and fucked up around him is enough to make him spurt into her like he’s been edged this whole time.

In a way, he has. A very pleasant way.

He lets her drift off as he relaxes into the comfort of his own release. After the first gushes it is as sluggish as her breathing.

Lucien murmurs her name to check on her and gets only a tired sound of acknowledgement. He pulls out slowly, watching the way he drags her open and smears his cum backwards and out of her. Her thighs twitch as he goes, so he puts a hand on each of them to catch that glorious feedback. He does not want to take his eyes off the cream oozing out of her.

“Should I leave it on?” he asks.

“No,” she moans. “Please no.”

He presses the buzzzzzzzzzzz against her anyway, but does take it away after that. “Oh, alright,” he tells her. He’s winded but he does not think she will recognize his vulnerability when her own is so terribly overwhelming.

He tells her she can relax but not fall asleep, and he takes himself in hand to work up to painting her belly. There’s so much of her beauty to take in it feels like barely any time at all before he’s breathing harder through his nose and feeling the inevitability at the base of his shaft, the point of no return reached and run past.

“Beautiful,” he breathes before the first spatter even lands. She looks down at her body in a daze as his cum glazes her lowest ribs and pools in her navel.

He allows himself to imagine absolutely covering her one day... it is important to him to be thorough, after all. But for now this will do. His little puddles and the charming stream he painted over her are trembling like she is seismic just underneath. To him, she is.