#Count Dooku

[bluepickle36]

I never actually watched tcw but I'm pretty familiar with the plot and this never fails to crack me up

[charmwasjess]

Since it’s my birthday this weekend, I’m giving myself the gift of rewatching the original trilogy and I’m having so much fun, god, I love Star Wars.

I haven’t rewatched the OT as recently as I have the prequels or certain TCW seasons, and because I can’t look at literally anything in existence without thinking of Dooku (eg., a potato, a used piece of floss, an electric bill), I can’t not take a moment to compare and contrast Vader and Dooku in their respective roles as Sith apprentice. Namely, to reflect on how my fav is a kind of a sad loser in comparison. Just a couple random thoughts:

Vader is choking out disposable underlings over zoom whereas Dooku in TCW is the disposable underling getting choked out lol, F, sorry, bro, I wonder how close Sidious came to actually killing him in that one episode, you know he thought about it

Vader is on the Rebel's heels in the opening scene, first through the doors at Hoth, he’s a step ahead of the gang on Cloud City. So proactive! So competent! It’s an interesting contrast between that go-get-'em 110% attitude and Dooku’s constant refrain of “can’t someone else do it?” Dooku, being asked to do something in his job description:

You have to know the minute Vader started talking what-ifs about how Luke “could be turned, something-something, powerful ally!!”, Sidious was quietly thinking “oh not this fucking shit again” and getting flashbacks to Dooku bleating that about Rael, Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, probably Sifo-Dyas

I found that same “the son of Anakin Skywalker” conversation between Sidious and Vader very interesting. And I'm not trying to make too much out of this, because, of course, they can't spoil the I-am-your-father reveal, so Sidious refers to Anakin Skywalker in the third person instead of "your son" and of course, Vader-is-Anakin is an in-universe secret, too. But they're in private in that scene, and I can't help but notice how differently Sidious treats the Tyranus - Dooku alter ego - also an in-universe secret. He might call Dooku Tyranus, but whenever Dooku's Jedi past comes up, Sidious consistently uses "you." Tyranus's past isn't dead to Sidious, it's something he actively throws in Dooku's face. I'm thinking about Sidious's sneering line in Dark Rendezvous about Yoda: "Did you love him?"

[rochenn]

Thinking about Dooku in distress and pain is one of my favorite things ever. Makes my heart swell. I should pull up some old whumptober prompts or whatever and practice writing drabbles, that would probably be sexy

[skeletons-eat]

Y'all depression is depressioning

[darth-jess]

One of my favs omg

That one episode in TCW

[prequelsnet]

@prequelsnet prequels appreciation week: day 5 — found family

↳ The Disaster Lineage

[redstuffs-ig]

Quick tip for Star Wars modern au writers! If you're not sure how to use him in your story, write Grievous as Dooku's weird pet gecko for which Obi-Wan holds an immeasurable amount of contempt. Anakin just thought he'd be bigger.

[galactic-rhea]

While I work on a longer Luke & Anakin comic, have this y'all, is cursed :)

For cursed context you can check this

[lualuadraw]

evil grandpa takes obi-wan off melida/daan

[saphronethaleph]

Soresu Negotiations

“Get help,” Palpatine said. “You’re no match for him. He’s a Sith Lord.”

Obi-Wan turned to look at the Chancellor. “...yes?” he said. “But he’s also something else – something I’m surprised you’ve forgotten.”

“What?” Palpatine asked.

“A politician,” Obi-Wan replied, turning back to Dooku.

Anakin groaned, then sat down.

“Here we go,” he said.

Palpatine blinked, looking from Anakin to Obi-Wan.

“...what do you mean, Anakin?” he asked.

“This happens sometimes,” Anakin replied. “How do you think he got his nickname?”

“Count,” Obi-Wan said, at about the same time. “It’s occurred to me that I never actually found out what the Confederacy wants.”

“Isn’t it a little late for this?” Dooku asked. “We have been at war for several years.”

“True,” Obi-Wan conceded, readily. “The war having started on Geonosis, because of tracing back your clone army which we… appear to have appropriated, mostly because you did it in our name. But that’s how the war started – not your objectives.”

Dooku was silent for a moment.

“I assume some semblance of a point will be emerging,” he said, eventually. “If you could be so kind as to provide it?”

“Wars begin for all sorts of reasons,” Obi-Wan replied. “But how they end… they end because a mutual settlement has been reached. And it’s occurred to me that I don’t know what you’d want out of a victory.”

He spread his hand, the one not holding the – unlit – saber. “It’s not the conquest of the Republic, I can tell that much. If the CIS annexed the Republic, what you’d have would still be the Republic, just under a different name… it’s not the Republic without the corruption that’s been causing it problems, because most of the corruption in the Republic was – was – the big industrial concerns like the Techno Union, Commerce Guild, Trade Federation. But you seem to have taken all of those off our hands, and they provide essentially your entire military so I don’t think anyone else could honestly believe that either.”

“I wouldn’t expect a Jedi to understand,” Dooku replied. “The Confederacy’s member systems have concerns relating to over-centralization.”

Obi-Wan stared at him for a long moment.

“...no they don’t,” he said.

“I hardly think you can have earned your reputation as a negotiator, Kenobi, if you are so willing to be insulting,” Dooku said, archly.

“That’s not what I mean,” Obi-Wan replied. “I mean… yes, now the Republic has an army, though really it’s actually the Jedi’s army and we’re simply letting them borrow it, but four years ago the Galactic Republic was proverbially incapable of doing anything. It took emergency powers for the Chancellor to get the Republic to authorize having any kind of military whatsoever – and the only one available was the one you ordered. That’s not over-centralization.”

He drummed his fingers on his ‘saber. “And I note that I overheard Nute Gunray insisting on the head of Senator Amidala – literally, in those words – as his price for signing a treaty. But I still haven’t heard an actual answer. What does the Galaxy look like if the Confederacy wins?”

Dooku frowned, and after about three seconds Obi-Wan glanced at the Chancellor.

“Didn’t you discuss this at any point, your excellency?” he asked. “Count Dooku doesn’t seem to have thought about this.”

Palpatine blinked.

“...he’s a Sith Lord,” he repeated. “Shouldn’t you be fighting him?”

“It’s called diplomacy, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan replied, before returning his attention to Dooku. “Grandmaster, are you seriously telling me that you never thought about what you would do if you won?”

Anakin checked his comlink, for the time, then the ship trembled slightly.

“Artoo?” he asked. “Can you tell those ships outside to stop shooting at us and give us a wide berth? This could take hours and I don’t want to find out if my name’s literal.”

“Hours?” Palpatine repeated.

“He’s rolling,” Anakin replied, rolling his eyes. “Like I say, I’m used to this.”

He rummaged in a pocket of his robes, taking out a miniature toolkit, and began disassembling his lightsaber. “I’m pretty sure I can retune these crystals to give two stable configurations which it’ll snap between, that should give me a length toggle instead of a single adjustable length…”

“Are you taking your lightsaber apart?” Palpatine hissed. “What if you need to fight?”

“It’s okay, Chancellor, I’ll get about five minutes’ warning if the negotiations are going downhill,” Anakin replied. “That should be time to put it back together again…”

Palpatine looked up to Obi-Wan, who – sure enough – was still going.

“...of course, a separate but related issue is what it’s going to be like afterwards,” Obi-Wan said. “In principle the Republic and the Jedi Order could probably accept the existence of Sith so long as we actually knew who they were and they weren’t trying to destroy us. It’s the fact that the first Sith we met in a thousand years tried to run Anakin over and cut Qui-Gon’s head off as an opening move that’s soured us towards them a bit… but are you really going to be content as someone whose whole job is to die for Sidious?”

Dooku stared at Obi-Wan, baffled, then glanced at Palpatine and Anakin.

“What do you mean?” he asked, forcing his gaze back to Obi-Wan.

“Sidious is your Master, we know that much,” Obi-Wan replied. “Partly because you told me yourself. But has he ever put himself in danger? Or has it all been you dealing with Jedi like myself and my apprentice? Putting yourself out there, in danger, while you do exactly what he says?”

He smiled slightly. “A Jedi would accept that, but you’re a Sith – you’ve said so yourself. Sith are self-interested. What do you think your new master is getting out of the situation? Because if you don’t know, it’s got to be something and it’s probably something he doesn’t want to tell you.”

“My master is quite willing to put himself in danger,” Dooku said, then clamped his lips shut at a frantic mouthed shut up from Palpatine.

“Real or feigned?” Obi-Wan asked. “Do you think he wouldn’t manipulate you? He’s been doing it to everyone else – you’ve said it.”

Dooku’s brow furrowed.

“But we’re getting off topic,” Obi-Wan said, turning to look at Palpatine. “Chancellor, what about this as a starting point? Your emergency powers were granted to resolve the crisis, and I’m sure you want to abandon them as soon as possible… so why not take away the whole reason why the individual systems in the Confederacy had problems with the Republic to begin with? Freely allow the departure of any system which wishes to do so, under the emergency powers legislation; enact a progressive tax, one which hits the Core worlds harder owing to their greater ability to pay, to sustain a carrier based navy able to hunt pirates more effectively than conduct occupations or orbital bombardment, and have the navy established on a sector-federal two-level model?”

Palpatine stared at Obi-Wan for at least ten seconds.

“...he’s a Sith Lord,” he said, yet again.

“Oh, shut up,” Dooku replied. “You’re a Sith Lord and I don’t see you doing anything constructive.”

Obi-Wan glanced at Palpatine.

“...you know,” he began. “I’m quite sure you’d need to note that on your financial disclosure forms, your Excellency.”

He turned sideways, so he could see both Dooku and Palpatine at the same time. “What was the point of this whole abduction, anyway?”

“As it happens, I was supposed to kill you,” Dooku said. “It’s the only way to turn Anakin to the Dark Side, if you’re out of the way.”

“Huh?” Anakin asked. “Is something up? I’ve almost got the crystals realigned.”

“This plan looked a lot better this morning,” Palpatine muttered.

[stealingpotatoes]

Imagine ghost Dooku's reaction to literally all of Rebels! And/or to each of your AU’s!

you guys come up with some random-ass ideas but i love it lets run with it

(commission info // tip jar!)

[mandhos]

perdon por la falta Sabine...

[red-raven-reading]

What is it about Obi-Wan Kenobi that makes everyone think: 'I've got to choke this b*tch.' ???

[m00ntunaart]

Even as padawan Obi-Wan knew Grandpa Dooku was stinky.

(I know canonically Dooku and Obi-Wan didn’t meet until Attack of The Clones, but screw the canon timeline. I want gremlin padawan Obi-Wan and grumpy rat-bastard Master Dooku to meet).

[rochenn]

I don't post enough Dooku for someone who calls himself a Dooku Guy. Have this

[6blackfilin9]

it's not him locked up with you, it's you locked up with him

... for an hour or two, til' he escapes, i guess